#reblogging to send them waffles

[necrotic-nephilim]

in lieu of having posted any writing/headcanons/asks in the past few days because i have been *so* busy and unable to do anything fandom-related which is terrible and evil, i have a poll out of morbid curiosity and self-indulgence. i've been meaning to ramble here about how i feel about DC's lack fo Deaf representation and which Batfam members i would personally make Deaf, but i am mildly curious about the larger opinion and now i will subject you all to the question, i would love to hear thoughts/opinions/headcanons on any specific choices. (would love d/Deaf/HoH opinions esp but i'm mostly expecting this to reach the hearing crowd, so opinions from hearing ppl are ones i'm very curious about. if you've never given it thought before you are going to now or else /lh)

[violentdelightsandviolentends]

Honey Girl. Chapter Eight.

chapter one. chapter two. chapter three. chapter four. chapter five. chapter six. chapter seven. chapter nine. chapter ten. series masterlist. the playlist.

Chapter Synopsis - Turns out, you’re not the only ones with a secret.

Pairing - Dadsbestfriend!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader - soulmate au

Warnings - cursing. mentions of hospitals/medical settings.

Word Count - 5k

Authors Note - I promise that the reveal was supposed to be in this part!! but I hit 5k words real quick and thought rather than rush it, I’d give it its full own chapter. guess what’s coming next ;). as always, thank you for your love and support and patience and encouragement and kindness. don’t know where I’d be without it <3

as always, if you enjoyed this, please consider reblogging!! reblogs are the only way to circulate my writing, which generates more of it. feel free to send me a comment or an inbox, too!! thanks, my loves!! <3

Masterlist. Inbox.

The sun beams through the white linen curtains, salty ocean breeze drifting through the open window. The rays warm your skin as you kick off the sheets, stretching your arms above your head. You turn over, to find the space next to you empty.

Rubbing the sleepiness from your eyes, you yawn, inhaling the scent of breakfast. Throwing on Bucky’s soft blue button up, you pad out to the kitchen to find him at your stovetop, shirtless and sun kissed.

“I’m getting the full girlfriend experience, huh?”

He grins at the sound of your voice, entire body lighting up with it.

“Girlfriend,” he laughs. “This is the soulmate experience, baby. It’s even better.”

You shake your head, but you can’t fight the smile that etches itself on your face. He looks so at home here, so comfortable. He reaches up to grab a plate from your cupboard, and you feel the sudden urge to burst into tears.

He knows where everything is.

He’s learnt his way around the kitchen just like he’s learnt his way around your heart. Your soul. Your very existence.

“You okay?”

He turns off the burner and glides over to you, warm hands finding your hips like it’s second nature.

“What’s wrong? You like pancakes,” he teases, leaning in to press a kiss to your forehead tenderly. “Oh no. Did you want waffles?”

You shake your head, swallowing down the lump in your throat.

“I’m fine,” you say, but your voice cracks instantly.

“Doesn’t sound like it.”

He says it so gently, so carefully. You feel like a precious flower, something to be taken care of, cherished, loved. No one has ever made you feel like this.

“I just realised you… fit, here. Like you were always supposed to. I can’t really remember what this apartment was like before it had you in it too.”

Bucky cradles your face in his hands, tilting your head up to look at him.

“Wherever you are. That’s where my home is.”

You surge forwards to press your lips to his, alive and buzzing with the electricity of being loved so wholly. He reciprocates instantly, wrapping his arms around your back to pull you closer, so you’re chest to chest.

“Your pancakes are going to burn,” you mumble, forehead resting on his.

“Let them.”

“No, don’t let them. I’m not calling the fire department today.”

He laughs, kissing you again chastely before returning to his original position. He plates up your breakfast - pancakes, fruit, granola and yoghurt, with fresh coffee in your favourite mug.

“I could get used to this.”

“And you will,” he flirts, kissing the crown of your head. “Every day for the rest of your life, baby. You’re gonna have to wake up to my face forever.”

You pretend to shudder, laughing when he pinches your side.

“Come on, trouble. Let’s eat breakfast on the balcony and pretend we’re on a tropical vacation somewhere.”

“Sounds perfect.”

✵  ✵    ·　 ✵ 　　 *  · ✵

“We’re really doing this.”

You look up at Bucky, the heavy weight of his arm around your shoulders acting as a grounding agent. Your plates are discarded on the table, cleared and finished, the two of you curled up in your loveseat. The sun is getting warmer, and it’s bringing out Bucky’s freckles, all boyish and glowy.

“We don’t have a choice.”

“Honey girl, there’s always a choice.”

“Not this time,” you sigh, shifting so you can face him properly. “I wanted to do this on our terms, and now I feel like I’ve been forced into it. It isn’t fair.”

“We can wait,” Bucky reassures, confident and understanding. “We don’t have to do anything until you’re ready.”

“I am ready. I have been for a while. It just sucks that it feels like I’ve been pushed in a certain direction, you know?���

“I know,” he soothes, work rough fingertips tracing patterns on your bare legs. “But like you said, we were going to do it anyway. This is still our choice. These are still our terms.”

You press your lips onto his cheek, chuckling when his stubble tickles your skin. He retaliates by attacking you with kisses, planting them all over your face, wherever he can reach. You squeal, hands flying out to his bare chest to try and stop him.

“Your neighbours are going to think there’s a murder happening,” Bucky laughs, fingers sliding up your shirt to rest on your ribs.

“Oh no, they love you too much for that.”

He quirks his eyebrows in surprise.

“They do?”

“The lady that lives next door, Mrs Daniels - she’s like ninety, has that white cat you always see?”

Bucky nods in recognition, so you continue.

“She talks about how handsome you are every time I see her. Always asks when the ‘man that looks like a movie star’ is coming over next.”

He laughs, shaking his head as you tease him.

“Shut up.”

“I’m serious! She probably watches you come and go from her balcony. She’s gonna love it in the summer, when you turn up in your short shorts with no shirt on.”

Bucky chuckles, pulling you into him and leaning his head on top of yours.

“Don’t be jealous, baby. You’re the only one for me.”

“I better be,” you chide jokingly, pinching his thigh in warning.

“I’ve been waiting for you my whole life.”

There’s no humour, anymore. Just love. So much love.

“I’m here now,” you whisper. “And I’m not going anywhere. Ever.”

Bucky leans in to press a kiss to your lips, gentle and filled with a lifetimes worth of promise.

“I love you, honey baby.”

“I love you, Bucky Barnes.”

You let the morning sun slip over you like silk sheets, warm and smooth and completely luxurious. Bucky’s steady breathing grounds you slowly as peace and contentment settle into your bones, weighted and calming. No matter what happens today, you know one thing for certain - you have the security of Bucky’s love to fall back on.

✵  ✵    ·　 ✵ 　　 *  · ✵

You’ve been sat in Bucky’s truck for twenty five minutes.

It’s parked down the block from your parent’s house, just out of the way. You were pulling in to their street when you panicked, begging Bucky to stop the car so you could breathe for a second.

“Sweet girl, we’ll be fine.”

“I know. I know,” you exhale. Inhale again. “Why is this so hard?”

“Because we’ve been thinking about this moment ever since that first night.”

“It’s almost been a year.”

That seems to stop Bucky in his tracks for a second.

“It… it doesn’t feel that long. Feels like yesterday. But also, somehow, like I’ve loved you my whole life.”

You lean over the console to kiss him softly, trying to ignore the hummingbird fluttering of your heart in your chest.

“Honey, I can feel your anxiety, remember? If you don’t calm down a little, we’ll both collapse.”

“Sorry,” you laugh, taking a deep breath. “Sorry.”

Bucky intertwines his fingers with yours, thumb running over the backs of your knuckles. Soothing, like a field of lavender gently blowing in the breeze on the first day of spring.

“We have to do it sometime.”

“I know,” you nod, squeezing his hand once, twice, three times before pulling away and fixing your hair in the tiny mirror. “Let’s do this. Now or never.”

You pull up outside your childhood home, instantly relaxing a little at the sight of the colourful drapes and flowers in the windows.

“Shit, Buck. We haven’t even planned what we’re gonna say.”

“We don’t need to. Just speak from your heart, baby. I’ll follow your lead.”

When you walk up the driveway, you know there’s no turning back. You also know that the weight on your shoulders will feel a hell of a lot less heavy when you leave. It’s a double edged sword, but you’re ready to wield it, with love as your armour and Bucky as your shield.

You stand a foot apart and ring the doorbell, bouncing nervously on the soles of your feet.

“Hi, sweetheart. Oh - hey, Buck.”

“Hi, Mama.”

“Hi, Lori.”

“Didn’t expect to see you both today.”

You go to speak, but she continues quickly.

“I’m glad you’re here. We need to talk to you both about something. Come in, come in.”

You look at Bucky, realising suddenly that your chest is filled with a foreign anxiety. It’s his.

You squeeze his hand chastely as you walk past him to enter the house, kicking off your shoes in the hallway.

There’s something in the atmosphere when you walk into the living room. The sun is still shining, everything is in its rightful place… but it feels wrong. You know Bucky feels it too, judging by the way his muscles tense next to you.

“Is everything alright, Mama?”

You hate the way your voice sounds like a child’s, small and naive. Your Dad is sat on the couch waiting, always happy to see you. You press a kiss to his cheek before taking a seat across from him, Bucky sitting next to you. Your Mom joins your Dad, both of them looking at you with too much compassion for a normal day.

“What are you two doing here?” your Dad asks, voice still full of light.

Something inside of you is telling you to abort mission, postpone until further notice. You listen to it, wondering for a second if somehow you and Bucky can send messages to each other telepathically all of a sudden.

“Mama said you needed to talk to me. To us.”

He looks taken aback, only for a second. Something like sadness flashes in his eyes before he paints that familiar smile right back on his face.

“Yeah, we do. You sure you don’t wanna tell us why you’re here, first?”

“It can wait,” you reassure, catching Bucky’s minute nod from the corner of your eye.

“Okay,” your Mom begins. “First of all, I need to tell you not to panic, okay? It’s going to seem super scary, but it isn’t.”

Bucky slides closer to you by a millimetre, but you feel it like it’s a mile.

“I don’t really know how to tell you this, honey, so we’ll just start from the beginning. Jack?”

Your Dad nods before taking over the storytelling.

“It all started last year. I was doing some work in the backyard. One minute I was mowing the lawn, the next I was lying on the ground.”

All of the colour drains from your cheeks, and Bucky slides ever so slightly closer again.

“We thought maybe it was heat stroke, or dehydration. No cause for concern, and nothing your Mom’s iced tea couldn’t fix.”

She takes his hand in hers, both of them with their eyes fixed on you.

“But then it happened again. In the shower, this time. I didn’t hit my head, luckily, but I did whack my shoulder against the tiles, which hurt like hell.”

He laughs, and so does your Mom, but you’re not sure what’s funny. Anxiety is rolling off you in waves so strong, Bucky’s worried he might pass out.

Your Mom takes back the reigns, continuing.

“I was insistent that he saw a doctor, which he was reluctant about. Luckily, he agreed, finally,” she gives him a look, “and we got referred to a specialist.”

“What kind of specialist?” you choke out. It feels like someone is sitting on your chest, constricting your lungs with every passing minute.

“A cardiologist.”

It seems to be that word that unravels everything for you. All you can think is cardiologist heart attack cardiologist surgery cardiologist. Serious. Serious. Serious.

“Sweetheart?”

You grab Bucky’s hand, praying that the familiar touch will ground you back down to Earth. When it doesn’t, you feel like you’re falling, down and down and down with no end in sight.

“Honey, it’s okay. Hey, listen to me. You’re okay.”

Your Mom sits down on the other side of you as your Dad kneels down, forcing you to look at him.

“Sweetheart, don’t panic, okay? Everything’s going to be fine. I know it’s scary, but I’m okay.”

“For now,” you whisper, limp in your throat forming.

“I know it’s a lot to take in, and I know it’s probably not what you were expecting us to say. We thought we’d wait until we had answers to tell you… but it’s taking longer than expected. Which is why we’re telling you now. We don’t want you to feel like you’re in the dark.”

Bucky’s running his thumb over the lines on your palm, reassuring and steady. He knows exactly how to comfort you, like a warm blanket wrapped around your shoulders. If you listen carefully enough, you can hear the drumming beat of his heart. You tune into it, letting the familiar rhythm calm you down.

“Sorry,” you murmur. “I’m being dramatic.”

“You’re not being dramatic,” your Mom responds, squeezing her hand over your knee. “It’s overwhelming. And we’ve just… thrown it at you, with no warning. It’s a lot to take in.”

You’re anxious and scared and completely lost. You’re also safe and home and completely surrounded by love from all sides.

“I’m okay,” you nod, taking a deep breath.

Your parents return to their couch across from you, but Bucky’s hand doesn’t let go of yours. If they think it’s strange, they don’t say anything. You have a feeling they’re a little preoccupied.

“Now what?”

“Your Dad is still undergoing tests to get to the root of the issue. Whatever they find, we know we’ll all be okay.”

“Your Mom’s right. I have an appointment this afternoon for an EKG. They’re trying to rule things out slowly. We’ll get to the bottom of it, sweetheart.”

“Are you okay?” you ask, suddenly realising you’ve accidentally made this about you.

“I’m fine,” he laughs. “Seriously. I know it’s scary, but I feel good in myself for the most part. The most annoying thing is that I can’t predict it - it just happens. Very inconvenient, if you ask me.”

Your parents laugh, and this time, you try to chuckle with them.

“You’ll keep us updated, won’t you?”

Bucky’s voice surprises you, somehow. His fingers are still intertwined with yours, but you’ve been so focused on your Dad, you almost forgot he was there.

“Of course, Buck.”

“And if you ever need a ride to an appointment or anything, all you gotta do is ask, alright?”

“You offering to take me on your motorcycle?”

“Sure,” Bucky laughs.

“Absolutely not,” your Mom says at the same time.

You chuckle for real, now. This feels like normality - the four of you, joking around. You have to remind yourself, sometimes, that Bucky knew your Dad before he ever knew you. You were away at culinary school when they met, but you were told stories instantly about this new guy in town who bought the old Garage and drives a cool truck. Your Mom, of course, didn’t fail to mention his big blue eyes and chocolate brown hair, or the way his shirt hugged his biceps. You thought she was exaggerating, when she said he was handsome.

Oh, how wrong you were.

You’re one hundred percent sure you’ve never met a more beautiful person. Maybe it’s your Tethering talking. Maybe it isn’t. You’re not unaware of the way people look at Bucky - he’s got this old school movie star thing going on, and people seem to eat it up. You get it. You get it more than anyone.

But it isn’t his pretty face that makes your heart skip a beat. It’s just him. Him, with his contagious smile and healing laugh and observant eyes. Him, with his confident demeanour but gentle touch, his mind reading abilities, his talent for making you feel like you’re the only person in the room. He’s a rarity, Bucky Barnes. A diamond in the rough. You remind yourself everyday how lucky you are.

He knocks his knee into yours, pulling you out of your daydream. He gives you a look that asks are you okay? to which you nod subtly in reply. A conversation, somehow both silent and loud.

“As much as I’d love to stay here all day, we should get ready to go. My appointment is soon.”

Your Dad strides over to you, wrapping you in his arms. You instantly feel like a little girl again, safe and protected no matter what. You bury your face into his chest a little more, inhaling the familiar scent of your home.

“Everything’s okay, sweetheart,” he whispers into your hair. “Promise.”

You nod against him, tightening your arms ever so slightly. He gives you a squeeze, letting you know he got the message.

As you’re putting your shoes on in the hallway, you can hear your Dad and Bucky chatting away about the baseball game from the previous night, routine easily resumed. Your Mom brushes your hair back from your face, looking at you carefully.

“I almost forgot why you came here in the first place, babygirl. What’s up? What did you want to tell us?”

Your heart skips a beat and Bucky feels it, glancing over to you with concern in his ocean blue eyes.

“It’s okay, Mama. It can wait.”

She raises her eyebrows in scepticism.

“Promise,” you reassure. “Another day.”

She doesn’t look convinced, but lets it go anyway, pressing a kiss to your cheek gently.

“We’ll call you after his appointment and let you know what they say. We love you. So much.”

You hug her fiercely, realising that you don’t do it often enough.

“Love you guys. More than anything.”

Bucky gives you a nod that tells you he’s ready to go, both of you leaving a little different than you entered.

“Call us as soon as you get out of that room, okay?”

“We will, Buck,” your Dad laughs, mock saluting his best friend.

Bucky chuckles, falling into step next to you as you walk down the driveway. You make your way down the street, out of your parents view, before your knees give out. He manages to catch you just in time, strong arms wrapped around your middle. You both sit on the kerbside, Bucky rubbing soft patterns into your back through your shirt.

“Baby, hey. You okay? Talk to me.”

You take a deep breath, looking at him with watery eyes.

“What if it’s bad, Buck?” you whisper. “I can’t do this without him. He’s the best Dad in the world.”

Bucky pulls you closer, fitting you into his side perfectly. Two pieces of a jigsaw puzzle, made for each other.

“They don’t lie to you, honey. They’d tell you if it was really serious. All you can do is wait, and hope everything will be okay. Which it will.”

You rest your head on his shoulder, letting his warmth calm you down.

“My Mama knows something.”

“Like what?”

“About us. She didn’t say anything, but I could see it on her face. She didn’t push it any further, but she was definitely suspicious.”

“We’ll tell her soon. Give it a little more time.”

You nod, wrapping your arms around his bicep tightly. He presses a kiss into your hair, inhaling the scent of your shampoo as he does it.

“Let’s go home, hmm? We can sit in the sun for a while, chop up that pineapple we bought yesterday.”

“Sounds perfect,” you whisper, looking up at him.

The afternoon hits his face just right, all warm yellow light and soft angles on his cheeks. The intermittent salty breeze ruffles his hair, all fluffy and sea swept. He looks like an ancient statue, a work of art from the renaissance, a museum piece. The sun could burn out tomorrow, but you’ll have a life source forever. Your Soulmate.

Bucky takes your hands in his and helps you to your feet, heavy arm slung over your shoulders as you walk back to the truck.

Your light in the dark. Your water in the desert. You’ve never been more grateful for him.

✵  ✵    ·　 ✵ 　　 *  · ✵

“Close your eyes.”

Bucky’s driving you home, the sound of the ocean waves hitting the shore a replacement for the radio.

“What?”

“Close your eyes, sugar. I want to show you something.”

“How are you gonna show me if my eyes are shut?”

He chuckles, pinching your thigh.

“Just shut up and close your eyes.”

You smile gently before doing as he says, covering your face with your hands for good measure.

“Where are we going?”

“It’s a surprise. You’ll like it, I promise.”

You relax back into the seat, allowing the breeze from the open window to whip through your hair. Eventually you come to a stop, Bucky clicking off your seatbelt for you.

“Keep ‘em closed.”

Bucky sprints around to the passenger side, swinging open the door and wrapping his arms around you. He practically carries you out of the car, ensuring you don’t trip while you have no vision. He plants you on two feet, making sure you’re steady before he lets go of you.

“Okay. Open your eyes.”

You blink slowly, adjusting to the brightness of the afternoon.

You’re in the middle of nowhere. The two of you are stood on a huge, grassy plot of land, overlooking a small cove of the beach. You’re tucked completely out of the way, not a neighbour to be seen. All you can hear is the ocean, the birds, and the sound of your thumping heartbeat.

“Where are we, Buck? It’s pretty.”

He takes your hand, looking out towards the water.

“This is gonna be our house.”

Your head whips around in shock, confusion written all over your face.

“What?”

Your voice is barely above a whisper, but Bucky hears it, clear as day.

“I bought this land years ago, when I moved to town. I always knew I wanted to build a place of my own, but I could never get the plans off the ground. Something didn’t feel right. And then our Tethering happened…”

He squeezes your hand tightly, pulling you into his side.

“And everything fell into place. I was waiting for the right moment to show you, and it feels like you needed it today.”

You can’t speak. You’re completely lost for words, looking out at the perfect view. Turning to him, you throw your arms around his neck, burying your face in the crook of it and inhaling.

“Thank you,” you murmur into his skin. “It’s so perfect. You’re so perfect.”

“I’m so lucky,” he chuckles. “My God, you were worth the wait. I’d wait another ten lifetimes if I meant I got to love you again for one of them.”

You’re glad he’s holding onto you, or you’re convinced your legs would give out. You lean up to press a kiss to his lips, savouring the spearmint on his tongue.

“I love you,” you pray into his mouth. “I love you so much I can barely breathe.”

He kisses you back, harder, determined to show you exactly how he feels about you. Your fingers tangle into his hair, making him groan as you tug. His hands slide down to your ass, gripping harshly as he pulls you into his front. He wants every inch of you pressed together.

When you pull away, he rests his forehead against yours.

“You can have anything you want, you know.”

“Hmm?”

“With the house. I know we talked about it that night, at dinner in California. But if you think of anything else you’d like, all you gotta do is tell me.”

“One storey or two?”

“I was always thinking two.”

“Then I’d like a balcony, on the master bedroom. I love mine back at my apartment, especially in the summer.”

“Done,” he confirms, pecking your lips again.

“And a porch,” you whisper. “That we can sit on and watch the waves, when we’re old and grey.”

“I’ll be grey a lot sooner than you,” he jokes.

“You’re a lot more relaxed than me,” you laugh. “So I doubt that, actually.”

You rest your head on his warm chest, both of you swaying to the song of the ocean.

“We’ve got plenty of time, Buck.”

“All the time in the world, honey girl.”

The two of you stay wrapped in each other for a little while longer, enjoying the company of the one person you were destined for.

You can’t remember why you were ever so against soulmates. Loving Bucky is the easiest thing you’ve ever done.

✵  ✵    ·　 ✵ 　　 *  · ✵

The two of you spend the rest of the afternoon curled up on the balcony, letting the sun warm you from the outside in.

“Pineapple will always remind me of those margaritas,” Bucky smiles, throwing a piece into his mouth. “Our first date.”

“And last, apparently,” you laugh. “We haven’t been on one since.”

“I mean, we sort of date everyday, right?”

“Yeah, I guess we do. After we’ve told my parents, we don’t have to worry anymore. We can go out whenever we want, whenever we want.”

“Exactly,” he murmurs, leaning in to kiss you tenderly. “Not long now.”

The sound of your phone ringing startles you both, your hand flying out to find it in the cushions of the loveseat.

“Hello?”

“Oh, thank God. I half thought you were dead.”

“Not dead, Lacie. Just busy.”

She laughs, and you realise suddenly how much you’ve missed that sound.

“You’re back in town, right?”

“Yeah, just for a few more days. Then I’m gonna go back to Cali and pack up my stuff for good.”

“Perfect! Me and you are doing dinner tomorrow night. I want you to meet Cameron.”

“Really? Finally! I’m so excited, Lace. Your place, or are we going out?”

“Come to mine. Cam is the best cook, seriously. I’ve gotta run, we’re picking out a couch today. A couch, babe! Can you believe it?”

“Happy couch shopping, you two,” you laugh. “I’ll see you tomorrow. Love you.”

“Love you, bestie! Bye!”

You can’t help but smile when you hang up the phone.

“She’s gonna love having you back home again, isn’t she?”

“Oh, yeah. I can’t wait to see her more. I know she’s been so busy with her soulmate and me with work and with you, but I miss her like crazy. We text all the time, but it isn’t the same.”

“She knows about us, right?”

“Yeah,” you giggle. “She was the first person I told.”

“Thought so,” he laughs, pulling you back into his side. “Knew you wouldn’t be able to keep it from her for long.”

“She can practically read my mind. It was easier to avoid the truth over the phone, but the minute I saw her in person, I crumbled. She gives me this look, and I’m done for.”

Bucky chuckles fondly, pressing a kiss to your temple.

“I can’t wait to get to know her properly.”

“Oh, she’s gonna love you.”

“I hope so.”

“She will, trust me. She used to talk about how hot you were all the time. Pre-Cameron, of course.”

“I’m glad you’re finally getting to meet him.”

“Me too. I feel guilty, you know. It was the biggest moment of her life, and all of a sudden I’m up and leaving across the country, barely keeping in touch through scattered text messages. I was so wrapped up in you and in work, that I wasn’t there for her like I should have been.”

“I’m sure she’ll understand if you say this to her, honey baby. You have to remember that her Tethering was a lot less complicated than ours. They just got on with things, as easy as can be.”

“I guess you’re right,” you murmur into his chest. “I’ll tell her all of this when I see her tomorrow.”

He wraps both arms around you, pulling you impossibly closer. You relax instantly, the warmth of his skin and familiarity of his touch soothing you like melted honey.

Your phone rings again.

“I bet it’s Lacie moving the plans around,” you chuckle. “She always underestimates how long it takes her to get everything ready.”

You find your phone from under the cushion and answer it.

“Hi, sweetheart.”

“Mama?”

“Where are you?”

The sun disappears behind a cloud, sending a shiver down your spine.

“I’m at home.”

“I need you to go and get Bucky, and come to the hospital.”

Your heart stops in your chest, and Bucky has to breathe for the both of you.

“Why?” you ask, barely above a whisper.

“I’ll explain when you get here, but it’s more serious than we thought.”

She sounds scared, which in turn terrifies you. She’s the bravest person you know, your Mom. If she’s afraid, you know it’s bad.

“Okay,” you choke out. “I’m leaving right now. I, uh, I’ll get Bucky, and - do you need anything? Does Dad? I can bring whatever… whatever you need, what do you need?”

“Nothing, baby girl. Just you guys, for now, okay?”

“Okay. Yeah, okay. I, uh, I- I- I’ll leave right now. Where is he?”

“Follow the signs for Cardiology when you get here. Room 4.”

“He’s in a room? In a bed? Mama, please. What’s happening?”

You’ve never heard your voice sound so weak. You’re kicking yourself internally - you have to be strong for her. You need to be.

“Baby, just get here as soon as you can, okay? Get Bucky to drive. I love you.”

“I love you too. So much.”

You try to hang up the phone, but your hands are shaking so much that you’re unable to press the red button. Bucky does it for you, intertwining your fingers with his.

He pulls you to your feet, smoothing your hair back from your face.

“It’s all going to be okay, honey. Put your shoes on and grab your purse. I’ll get my keys.”

He kisses your forehead gently, letting his lips linger for a second before pulling you inside and shutting the balcony door.

He doesn’t let go of your hand the entire time, even as you drive to the hospital.

You feel like you’re drowning. Repeatedly slipping beneath the surface of the water, lungs heaving, desperate to stay afloat.

Bucky feels it, too. All he can do is hold your hand and hope for the best.

All he can do is hold your hand and hope for the best.

tag list part one

@lillytracy6996 @securegorgon @roostersforevergirl @povlvr @val-writesstuff  @dreadfulxives18 @1deadpool26 @abbygraceasd @nyutasgirl @mavrellover91 @winterslove1917 @f-this42 @skewedcherries @noisesinthedark @kandis-mom @black-cat-2 @harrystylesandthegoobs @vladsgirlxx @h0nestly-though @arienotari @nash-dara @wandaneedstherapy @galaxy-dusk @justherefortheficandsmut @cremebruleequeen @cjand10 @buggy14 @avengers-fixation @blueberrybambi @beautiful-loserr @sarah1barnes @miss-rebel-without-applause @ragingrainbowshipl @shamrockqueen @savemeroman @jenn-f @8crazy-freak8 @daddyjackfrost @openup-yourmind @adangerousbalance @mandijo17 @daddylorianisastateofmind @rcarbo1 @casa-boiardi @spideegwen @navs-bhat @mssbridgerton @asuni921 @middle-of-the-earth @mfrnchsk

[saradika-graphics]

This is going to sound really corny, but if you’re able to make some line dividers of pancakes (or waffles? or both?) that would be really really sweet :3 (pun intended). If you don’t want to, that’s okay <3 And if you have made some already, I must’ve missed them, so sorry in advance 🙈

ahh no - I love this!! 💖🥞 I put together an assortment for you, I hope you like them!! I am a waffle and pancake fan, so this was so fun - thanks for sending this in!!

[Free] Masterlist Headers & Dividers!

Please consider liking or reblogging if you use 💕

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Prerequisite

Masterlist

Warnings: this fic includes dark content including rape/noncon, power imbalance, blackmail, and other potential triggering elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: You attempt to move on from your time with Professor Hansen, but can't seem to shake the past.. (plus sized reader)

Characters: Ransom Drysdale, some Lloyd Hansen

A note on reader characters:

For clarity,  each reader will have a defined nickname when appearing in any installment not their own. This is Flora, previously featured in Below Average. This fic also features characters from various installments.

Note: Finally got this on paper.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. Thanks to everyone who reads this one and thank you for all your energy.<3

Love you all like Donkey love Waffles. Take care. 💖

You cross your arms as you narrow your eyes at the front of the lecture hall. It's your last choice in elective but the only one you could get to pad out your schedule. Law. Hardly riveting stuff.

What's more intriguing is the professor. No, no, you haven't acquired a taste for them, if anything Hansen taught you to be wary of them. The very lesson that has you glaring down at Professor Barber, waiting for his first slip.

You're not clever by any means, you're just the only one looking for the signs. The same ones you saw in Tweed at your first meeting, those that you catch in yourself, and the other girls who won't say the truth aloud. 

Brownie, that's the one. You see the way he looks at her and you note how she stays after class, every week. Only three weeks so far but a pattern is a pattern.

You twist your pen, the nib poking out, then do it again, retracting it. The clicking noise forms a tempo at your listless fidgeting. You have a study date tonight with the girls, what’s one more? You’re forming a habit of taking on lost souls, yourself just another wisp floating in the void.

You scribble down the date for your next quiz, your mind hardly processing the words as you guide the pen. You’re trying to plot your approach. You think you have an idea.

As Professor Barber dismisses class, you slide your notebook into your bag and hike it up onto your shoulder. At the edge of the row, as usual, you quickly descend as Brownie stays in her seat, waiting and watching her feet. You catch the small glances aimed in her direction from the man behind the podium.

You take out your phone and quickly text Cookie; ‘you got room for one more?’

You don’t wait for an answer. You don’t care. You’ve made up your mind, it’s a warning, not a question.

“Hey,” you come around the front row. The girl doesn’t seem to hear you. Or she’s ignoring you, “um, Brownie?”

She looks up, startled. She sends a look towards Barber but you ignore him. You cross your arms and sway, your skirt stirring around your legs.

“Remember me?” You ask, “you lent me your pen?”

“Oh, uh, I remember,” she squeaks, her voice thin and raw, as if she never uses it, “hi.”

“Um, so,” you try to sound casual, “I’m not really a law student. English,” you touch your chest and smile, “and I think I could use a study buddy, if you’re interested?”

“Er, oh?” Her brows draw together, “I don’t know…” she scratches her neck, another peek at the professor, “I–”

“Do you have plans? Or maybe you already have someone to study with,” you look away and frown, “sorry, I just figured I’d ask. I need someone to help me make sense of all this. I’m totally lost.”

There’s a subtle rumble, a noise you likely wouldn’t notice if you didn’t know to listen for it. You don’t even glance back at Barber as you hear him packing up. You sit in the chair next to Brownie and smile.

“I just figured you’re like, the smartest person in the class, and I need this grade to bring my average up. Please?”

She chews her lip and plays with the high collar of her turtleneck. She hides beneath her lashes, shrugging before she manages a tiny nod. Her fingers flutter and she shivers nervously.

“I can help,” she presses her fingers to the ribbed fabric of her shirt, “sure, I…”

“Me and my friends are meeting tonight, we’re getting pizza,” you chirp, “wanna tag along?”

“Friends?” She bats her eyes at you frightfully.

“Oh, don’t worry, they’re all super friendly and they’ll love you.”

“I… I don’t know. I’m not very…” she speaks so quietly you have to lean in to hear her.

“It’s okay, you don’t have to say much,” you assure her, “Cookie always bakes way too many brownies. You could help us finish them, huh?”

She looks terrified. Her mouth scrunches and shifts back and forth as she measures her options. You know exactly what she’s thinking. That man will be disappointed. Well, let him be. Unless he wants to step forward and admit that he’s fucking a goddamn student.

“Hm, okay, but… just for a little. I can’t stay very long.”

“Just until I figure out what actus reus means, alright?” You stand and send a sharp look towards the professor. He quickly dips his chin down in feigned concentration as he looks over his notes. Not today, fucker.

“Okay,” she gets up and lifts a crochet bag, her hand shaking as she tucks away her laptop in the slouchy purse, “um, I’m sorry, but… I forgot your name.”

“Don’t be sorry,” you wait for her to pass you before walking at her side towards the door. She’s still hesitant and reluctant as she looks over her shoulder, “Flora.”

💮

“This is Brownie,” you introduce the mousy addition to the girls as she tries to fade into the blue wall, “she’s in my law class.”

She doesn’t move. She just looks up with round eyes as the others cheerily call out their welcome, already clustered around the table amid coffee cups, laptops, and a few baked goods. The scent of cinnamon mingles with the stale caffeine.

“Welcome, Brownie,” Muse gives both of you a start as she appears at the girl’s other shoulder, “I’m Muse! Oh, you have wise eyes.” She flutters around the girl, a boa around her shoulders, “you would look wonderful in jade. Yes, it would highlight your undertones.”

Brownie frowns and mutters, but you can’t tell if it's a thank you or just a whimper.

“She says I’m a sapphire type,” you remark as you wave her away from the door, “you can toss your coat with ours,” you motion to the bench bench piled with outerwear, “then I’ll introduce you to the rest… they’re not as bouncy as Muse.”

Brownie gives up her dark gray coat and steps out of her plain boots. She dresses in a very simple way. Turtle necks, corduroys, nothing with much shape or structure. Her style can be best described as part of the wall.

“So,” you walk just ahead of her. She stays behind you as if trying to hide, “Tweed, Foxy, Sunny,” you point out the three girls at the table, “you met Muse,” you look at the artsy wraith fluttering around the counter, “and Cookie, our host.” 

The woman in question puts down a plate of sugar cookies, “hi, nice to meet you! I’ll find an extra chair.”

Brownie doesn’t say a word. You realise it might be a bit overwhelming. She reminds you of Tweed in that way. You point her to a chair and assure her you’ll take whatever Cookie comes up with. She sits, hugging her bag in her lap as she stares at the table.

Foxy gets up as you head for the counter, you pause and look back at Brownie, “you want some tea? Something to drink?”

She chews her lip before she answers, “water, please, if that’s okay.”

You nod and go to the cupboard. Foxy comes up next to you and leans on the counter as you shift to pull out the water jug from the fridge. You come back to her as she keeps her voice low.

“What’s up with that one?”

“Law professor, I think,” you mutter, “could barely get her here.”

“Fuck, another one, huh?”

“Uh, yeah, you know, shitty men everywhere,” you fill the glass, “I brought her here to try to forget all that. Like the rest of us.”

“Sure thing,” she taps the countertop with her nails and pushes off.

You put the jug back and take the water over to Brownie as Cookie emerges with a small white stool. You accept it, the seat lower than the rest so that you feel like a kid at the table. You pull out your laptop and open it up. Your phone slides out with it and you catch it as notifications flash on the screen.

You tap your thumb to expand the preview; Insta, emails, and a text that neither surprises or interests you. Professor Dillhole’s message is swiped away without reading a single word. You got your grade and now you’re done with him. He doesn’t seem to get the hint.

“So, Brownie, you’re in law? Are you going to be a lawyer?” Foxy asks.

Brownie shrugs and nods. You wonder for a moment how she’ll manage a courtroom when she can barely give a vocal answer. Well, she has lots of time to figure that out.

“That’s really cool,” you say, “you know, I don’t have the mind for all that. I can’t really sort out one act from the rest. I’m more into bigger narratives than the tiny details.”

She looks at you, still hugging her bag. She’s ready to leave at any moment.

“Why don’t you stay a while?” You poke her bag, “how about we compare notes? I’m sure I missed all the important stuff. This tort gibberish is doing my head in.”

She puts her chin down and slowly lifts the flap of her bag. She slides out her laptop and gently lowers the bag between her feet. She opens the lid, almost reluctant, and her desktop comes to life. You see the email in the corner right before the notif flicks away. A.Barber… Mmm.

For a moment, you feel a pang of guilt. You hope your impromptu invitation doesn’t cost her anything. That he doesn’t hold it against her. You should’ve thought of that sooner.

“Let me find…” she trails off, her finger running over the trackpad.

You wait patiently. No, you don’t feel bad. She deserves this. Like the rest of you, she needs a place to get away. Just a single space where she doesn’t have to be crushed under his thumb.

💮

You sit outside of Dean Drysdale’s office. His secretary types away at her keyboard and you twirl your phone in your grip. It’s mostly a paperweight these days as you ignore almost every message that comes in. Blocking didn’t work on that jag off.

You jiggle your foot anxiously. This meeting is important. You really need this scholarship and through the grace of your hard work, and the regrettable cooperation of a particular professor, you’ve met all the requirements. The last piece, an interview with the dean.

The clock ticks, drawing your attention in the stagnant office. It’s five after. The dean is running late. That doesn’t really matter, he can do whatever he wants. But you’re early and that can only help in his consideration.

You hear muffled voices near the other side of the door. Shadows darken the frosted glass emblazoned with the dean’s name and credentials. You sit up straight but try not to look too eager. The door opens and your heart falls into your ass. Fuck, not this guy.

“Friday,” Dean Drysdale claps Lloyd’s back as they emerge from the office.

“Can’t wait,” Lloyd returns but his eyes are on you, “ah, sorry,” he says to you, “didn’t mean to keep him so late.”

“No problem, professor,” you stand and grip the strap of your bag, masking your disgust with a smile, “Dean Drysdale,” you greet the other man, “nice to meet you. I’m Flora.”

“The one and only,” he doesn’t offer his hand, “looks like you’re running behind so better get started.” He points you into his office, “later, Hansen.”

He tosses the last remark over his shoulder as he turns to follow you through the door. You enter and hover across from his desk. You hate to be presumptuous. He shuts the door with a click.

“Sit,” he orders tersely as he rounds the desk and falls heavy into the leather chair.

You lower yourself. Your nerves are wily, especially after seeing Professor Hansen. You had no idea he was close with the dean.

“Hansen speaks highly of you,” he begins, “as do the rest of your professors.”

“Oh, I, that’s great.”

“So, I have thirty candidates. Why should I choose you?” He leans back, elbow on the armrest, posture nonchalant as he swivels.

“Um, well, I work hard. I keep my average up where it needs to be. I have gotten involved in quite a few extracurriculars, I helped with the library bakesale and–”

“Boring. Got it. That’s all in your application,” he dismisses, “just like all the other ones. Bunch of filler. But why you?”

You’re speechless. You prepared for this but you feel as if you fell into this from thin air. You don’t know what he wants to hear.

“How many parties have you been to?” He asks suddenly.

“What?” You can’t help your surprise.

“Come on. You’re a young coed. I know how it is. So, let’s narrow it down. Fall term, how many?”

You squint and look at the wall, thinking. You’re not much of a partier. You twiddle your fingers and count in your head.

“Four, maybe,” you push your shoulders up. “I don’t really… I mostly just spend my spare time with my friends–”

“Are they hot?” He chuckles and sits up, your mouth falling open. “Relax, I hate these things. So uptight,” he rolls his shoulders as he wheels closer to the desk and plants his elbows, “at least you're honest. The last six freshmen that sat there insisted on a big O. Think they would see the plaque and realise I’m not stupid.”

“Well, I… yeah,” you chew on the tip of your tongue. You really don’t know how to proceed. “I brought a portfolio of my essays–”

“No time for that,” he waves his hand at you, “think I got the picture.”

“Oh,” you frown.

He stares at you, poking his cheek with his tongue as his brows draw together. He hums and sits back, once more swiveling back and forth. He tilts his head and clucks.

“You’ll hear from my secretary,” he declares at last.

“That’s it?” You gulp.

“Yeah, whatever, I got about five more of these today and I need a fucking coffee,” he lifts his feet onto his desk. “Be a doll and send in Sienna when you leave.”

“Um, okay,” you stand slowly, “thanks for your time.”

He doesn’t respond as he takes out his phone. You hide your unease and leave. As you emerge you see the name card on the secretary’s desk. Sienna.

“Er, he told me to send you in,” you approach.

She looks up at you and snaps her gum, “great.”

She gets up as she rolls her eyes and you swiftly march past the desk. You don’t understand what just happened. Did you fuck it up? What did Hansen say? Oh my fucking good, you swear if he–

Your thoughts race ahead of your feet as they carry you without intention. You find yourself in the stairwell, stunned and confused. You turn down the first flight only to dodge out of the way of a figure coming up. You yipe as you find yourself shoved into the corner, Lloyd’s arms outstretched to pen you in.

His hands brace the painted brick as he smirks down at you, “hey, sweet cheeks, long time, no suck.”

You curl your lip at him and snarl, “get away from me.”

You shove on his chest and he retracts his hands, grabbing your wrists. You struggle with him but he easily pushes your hands up, pinning them to the wall. He leers as looms in front of you, his eyes scanning down your body.

“Damn, I forgot how good you look in those skirts. Panties or nah?”

“Fuck off–”

“Always looked better around your waist–”

“I said get the fuck off of me. I’ll scream–”

“I’d love to hear it,” he snickers, “what happened to us, flower? We were doing great. Living life, fucking hard.”

“You’re an animal–”

“We had a good thing, the whole professor-with-benefits gig worked for us, didn’t it? It sure as hell loosened you up. Look at you, all wound tight–”

You snap your teeth at him and he recoils, barely saving his nose from the chomp. He cackles and keeps you trapped, squeezing your wrists tighter. His laughter rolls out to a growl.

“You know, if you get that scholarship, they need two professor’s to sign off on it… but you know, I don’t just put my name on anything–”

“You’re pathetic.”

“I fucking am when I got blue balls, honey,” he scoffs, “just touch em. A little bit.”

You grit your teeth and throw your knee up. You yank your hands free and shoulder past Lloyd as he bends and grips his crotch. He chokes on his breath as he leans against the wall. You bluster away as quickly as you can.

“Not like that,” he gurgles as you charge down the stairs, dizzy as you turn down the next flight. 

So much for that scholarship.

💮

You stare at the C circled in red on your last quiz. Law isn’t your forte, that’s clear. Your GPA and hopes for that scholarship are dwindling in that simple little letter. You look up at the front of the lecture hall as Professor Barber reclaims the podium, preparing to take up the answers as he does every other week.

You sit closer than before. You’re always sure to take the seat next to Brownie and she has yet to tell you to stop. Something about her though suggests that she won’t ever do that. No has been erased from her vocabulary.

You don’t miss the Professor’s eyes as they flit up to your study buddy but quickly meet your own. He darts them away, caught. You wonder, however, if your middling grade has something to do with that. Oh well, you won’t regret doing the right thing.

As you open your laptop, an email pops up in the corner. ‘On Behalf of Dean R. Drysdale’. You click on it before you can stop yourself. You’re holding your breath. You read it slowly.

‘Schedule a follow up for the dean’s decision’.

What? That’s not an answer. Fuck. Why can’t they just put it right there? Yes or no. You have to stop yourself from slamming your laptop shut. You grab your quiz and rest it over your keyboard. You look over at Brownie, she stares at the paper in her hand. She got an A, as always.

“Good job,” you whisper.

“Mmm, yeah,” she returns as she drops the quiz onto her folding desk. “He’s a good teacher…”

“Sure,” you accept dryly.

She glances at you but says nothing. You hate to be sharp with her but it’s pretty obvious what’s going on. You’re just smart enough to know to be cautious. You can only be there for her when she needs you. It would be too risky to do anything else. And not fair to Brownie, that man could destroy her career. You’ve been her, you just hope she finds her way out.

“Alright, let’s get started,” Barber calls out, quieting the class, “it seems we need a lot of review on case law.”

💮

The hour is unexpected but you don’t think much of it. A dean is busier than most and you can’t help but imagine that Drysdale is even less elated to be meeting at such an off-time. Seven in the evening on a Friday is prime time, even for those outside the coed population.

You show up to an empty office. Sienna is gone, the place desolate. The vibe is off. Something about it reminds you of another meeting. No, this isn’t Hansen. Still, you’re on edge, vigilant as you approach the dean’s door, an amber glow through the frosted glass.

You knock and cross one arm over your chest, clutching your upper arm. You sway as you wait. Deja vu paralyses you on the spot. It can’t be. It can’t happen twice. This is about the scholarship.

The door opens and Drysdale steps back as he gives a flippant greeting, “come in.”

He has a glass in hand, a dark brown liquid in marbled crystal. He sips as the door falls open. You step inside and look around the office, the framed degree behind his chair and the several photographs placed around them; a previous dean with his imperious features, and a large house with a rustic landscape crowded around it. You hover at the threshold.

“Close the door,” he sits heavily, “these old buildings are drafty as–” he stops himself and smirks. 

He drains the last of his drink, liquor by your measure, and puts it on the marble coaster. You shut the door and sit, just like last time. You can’t help but be slightly irked to think he brought you all the way here to issue you a rejection.

“So, top three,” he points a finger gun at you as he slumps in the same lackadaisical way, “Flora… you’re a star. Shining reviews. Can’t say my professors ever said anything nice about me but you… you even got Hansen singing your praises.”

“Oh,” you utter.

“I’ve known him a while. We were in the same frat, you know? He was a senior when I was a freshman, hazed me real good but look how things turned out,” he leans an elbow on the armrest and cradles his chin. He watches you. “All these years and I never heard him say anything nice about a fucking student.”

You’re put off by the obscenity. Further, upended by his history with Lloyd. What does that have to do with anything?

“You know, he’s all about self-discipline but you get a few scotches down his gullet and he’s like an open book. Also…” he raises a finger, “leaves his phone unlocked.”

You try not to let that suspicion turn to panic. He can’t know. Even if he did, it’s not your fault. He should be talking with Hansen, not you. He’s the one abusing his position.

“You let him fuck you in his car,” he sits up and laughs, his hand on his stomach, “looking at you, I never would’ve guessed.”

“What? How–”

“I mean, he was hitting it from quite the angle so I don’t blame you for not noticing the phone in his front pocket…”

“No.”

“Yes,” he cackles. “Listen, sweetie, it’s not the first time it’s happened. Some girls just don’t have anything else to offer, so who am I to be mad if they use what they got.”

“I’m not– I’m not like that. He made me–”

“Oh, I’m sure the promise of an A plus helped,” he scoffs as he lets his hand drift down his stomach, “so what can a scholarship get me?”

He gropes himself through his russet coloured pants. Your throat constricts as you clutch your purse tight in your lap. You’re rigid, alight in horror and shame. Of course Lloyd didn’t walk away without something.

“I’ve waited twenty years for this,” he plants his feet.

“No, I’m not– I’m not doing this again.”

You stand and Drysdale rips his hand away from his crotch, snapping his fingers, “with that video, I could take you to the review board and have you kicked out. Not only that, all your credits would be invalidated.”

You swallow and wince. No, this can’t be happening. Again. You’re stronger than this. You’re worth more than these men’s dicks.

“So, sweetie pie,” he reaches forward and takes his phone off his desk, “we’re gonna make a nice little video for Hansen and show him how it’s really done.”

You shudder and hug yourself, “I…” your throat is dry, your heart hollow. What other choice do you have? You’ll lose everything. “I’ll do it, but no video. Please.”

“My rules. I am the dean and you are… the slutty coed.” He tuts, “mmm, classic Pornhub fodder.” He taps the screen of his phone, “let’s go. Get your clothes off.”

He aims the lens at you. You look at the floor. You can’t move.

“Please, turn it off.”

“Get your fucking clothes off,” he repeats, “I want to remind that fuckface what he’s missing out on.”

You dig your nails into the back of your arms then let go. You keep your head down as you lift the strap of your purse over your head and throw it in the chair behind you. You unzip your coat and shrug it off. The room rings in your ear and blurs in your vision. Your breaths are shallow and painful. Your skin is buzzing.

Your coat falls and you pull down the straps of the denim dress you wear over a flowered blouse. You shimmy it past your waist and peek up for just a minute. Drysdale bites his thumb as he records you.

You quickly tear away your gaze and continue. You unbutton the blouse and turn as you fight to free your wrists from the cuffs. Goosebumps speckle over your skin. You close your eyes and ball your hands before pushing your fingers wide. You touch the top of your stockings.

“You can leave those on, cheeks.”

You gulp and retract your hands. You pause and turn back to face the desk.

“Tits out, ass out, go on.”

No wonder he’s tight with Lloyd. Birds of a feather. You reach back to undo your bra and sling it onto the chair. You hook your thumbs in your panties and step out of them.

“I always liked an extra helping,” Drysdale taunts, “her cups overfloweth… is that Shakespeare?”

You don’t answer. You fight the urge to hide behind your arms. You raise your head. You have a morsel of dignity left in you.

“Come here,” he demands, “I wanna fuck those tits.”

You cringe but obey. If Lloyd taught you anything it was to just get it over with. You round the desk as he opens his fly. He pulls himself out above the zipper, playing with himself, rolling his thumb over his tip as he growls.

“Knees, baby, I’m sure you know the drill,” he snickers. You get down as he wiggles his dick in your direction, “push those things together.” You grab your chest and smush it together. He taps your tits with his tip and laughs, enjoying his mocking.

He guides himself down under your tits and slides between. He cups a hand around yours as he refocuses the phone on you. He rocks the chair back, moving his pelvis as he slowly starts to thrust. He groans at the friction. You clench your jaw tight, dreaming of biting off the end of his overinflated worm.

His breath hitches as he fucks faster, the bottom of his wolly sweater rolling up his muscles stomach. You could just punch him right there. You could grab him by his balls and twist. No, that would only assure you of your scholarly doom.

“Look at me,” he demands.

You snap your eyes open as he shoves the phone in your face. You shy away but he keeps fucking, turning the lens down towards your tits. He gives a breathy laugh and it trickles into a moan. Weak and pathetic.

“Shit, yeah, that’s good,” he groans, “give it a kiss, baby.”

You grit back your disgust. You bend your neck and kiss his tip as it pokes through.

“With tongue.”

You force your tongue out as his tip pops up again and you swirl around it, planting a sloppy kiss on the salty flesh. He twitches and hisses. He pulls his hand away from yours and grips the chair.

“That’s good, get up,” he snarls, “turn around.”

You suck in a chestful of air and do as he says. You get to your feet and turn away. He grabs your hips and rolls closer. 

“Bend over.”

You bend and rest your elbows on the edge of the desk. He angles you down into his lap, your body stretched between the two. He rubs his dick against your ass, once more tapping. He kneads the flesh. You shake your head as he tilts you further down.

He prods at your cunt and you can’t help but clench. He pushes against your entrance, tight and burning as he grunts, bulling his way past the resistance with a slap against your thigh. He latches onto your hip and pulls you down another inch.

“It’s all you. You just gotta fuck that scholarship outta me.”

You bite your lip and force yourself to take him. You hip down until you reach your limit but before you can pull back up, he grabs on and holds you in place.

“More.”

You sink your teeth in deeper, urging yourself lower until it’s unbearable. You take him in fully and let out a shaky breath through your nose. You raise your ass as he lets you go. He lets out a raspy noise and you repeat the motion. You keep your motion mechanical and slow, trying to adjust.

“Faster. I wanna see you jiggle.”

You roll your eyes and claw at your arm, arms crossed over the desk as you rock your weight over him. The flesh claps loudly as his chair squeaks with each descent. He groans and gulps, hand wandering over your flesh, along your thighs, across your ass, up your back.

“Fuck, look at her go,” he snarks, “you work that dick. Just like that.”

You close your eyes and let the scowl mar your features. You speed up. He’s almost there. You can feel the tension, you can hear it in his voice.

“Ah,” he pinches you meanly, “stop!”

You try to keep going but he pushes you off of him. He growls and the chair jars as he sits up. You puff and peek around your shoulder at him.

“I’m cumming in your fucking mouth,” he cradles his balls, half-keeled over. “Open the fuck up before I blow–”

You get back to your knees and glare at him. You won’t falter. You have nothing over these men but that. You lean your head back and open your mouth. He lets himself go and holds the camera over you.

“Well, not gonna finish itself.”

You grab him, roughly, and he grunts. A warning. You ease up and stroke him, placing your mouth by his tip. 

“Look into the camera, cheeks.”

You glare at the camera, you hope it can catch the sheer loathing radiating from you. You stroke him, squeezing harder and harder until he spasms and mewls. He spurts all over, missing your mouth and streaking up the bridge of your noises and across your brow, a few strings over your cheek. 

He gasps and clings to the chair as if he might slip out of it, the camera drooping with his arm. You let him go and wipe your slimy hand. You stand and snatch a tissue from the box on his desk and wipe the mess from your face. His heavy breaths fill the silence.

“Can I go?” You ask flatly.

“I got nothing else for you,” he spits out.

You refuse to look at him as you dress. He chuckles. You fight not to turn around and throw every single thing on his desk at him. You hate him. You hate Lloyd. But more, you hate yourself.

“Congratulations,” he says as you pick up your purse, “did I mention, paperwork went through yesterday.”

You whip around and stare at him. You quake with anger, eyes hot with unspent tears.

“Hey, even I got deadlines. Had to make the call last week.”

You take a step back. What the fuck? You stumble away, ready to scream, ready to strangle this man. For now, you’ll settle for never having to see him again.

[gatheredfates]

In the wake of there not being much to update the Compendium with, I thought it would be a perfect opportunity to promote the project broadly again. ✨

Hi! My name is Sea, and I have an unhealthy obsession with taking on large community projects! This is my Final Fantasy XIV Community Compendium, focusing on linking as many XIV writing/roleplaying discords, forums, events, free companies and resources as I can get my hands on. While the inspired by and predominately tailored for role-players, it should have something for anyone looking to engage creatively with the game in some capacity.

If you'd like to simply check out what the Compendium is all about and miss my waffling below, any of the links on this post will take you there — but this is a handy one! A reblog also goes a huge way to increase my reach and find communities/resources. You're also welcome to share this post with people not on Tumblr who might be looking for communities/resources, or have something to add.

What is the Compendium?

In my opinion, the way people engage with fandom and communities has changed. It was once extremely common for people to hop onto the XIV Roleplaying Forum or find people looking for contact on Tumblr, but most of these resources have shifted to Discord. While Discord is great for keeping a community when you have it, the isolation of these communities into hidden, secular spaces doesn’t do a lot to help people find them in the first place and creates an air of loneliness/disconnect for new players or people looking to find specific communities.

I don’t believe that a person should necessarily be a part of x amount of servers to find the one that suits them, nor that all communities should necessarily be on Discord — or just plain hard to find.

However, while this is currently the standard, I’d like to try and help these communities be fostered and seen in a place accessible to basically anyone with an internet connection. If one community has benefited from this document, then I have done my part.

What's on the Compendium?

Large-scale community discords such as the XIV Reddit Discord, Hunts, GPOSE promotions and broad-space roleplay servers that harbour a large number of people and are publicly available to all. These may not have an RP focus but will assist in other aspects of the game.

Free Company & community-focused servers. E.G. an Ishgardian Roleplay server whose mission is to foster a community for Ishgardian characters; an EU server created to help players struggling with timezones. This also includes event discords such as fight clubs, markets, cafes, etc.

Friend/casual servers that have a roleplay element but may be just a group of people looking to find others to hang out and do content with.

Miscellaneous. Likely to be less community servers and more resources such as lore compilations, how-to guides, gposing techniques, boosting blogs, etc. These may get their own dedicated section later.

Want to submit? You can either fill out the google form here, send me an ask with the relevant information contained on the Compendium, or join my Discord at SEAFLOOR (21+ only)!

Is my space suitable for the Compendium? Most of the time, yes! Below the read more is some more information/stipulations. Again, all accessible on the document! 🪸

Below are the following things I do not accept on the Compendium:

Personal/Single-Character LFC ads.

Content intended for or can be used for bullying, harassment and OOC gossip. E.g. ‘Secrets’ blogs, receipts, callout posts, etc. This does not include in-character tabloid blogs used to generate RP.

Communities that do not have an RP/writing element (large-scale exempt).

Anything I find personally distasteful or goes against the spirit of this project.

Common-sense rule applies.

FAQ.

I want to put my community on the compendium but we have an application process. Is this okay?

Yes! Just note somewhere in your application that's a requirement. The only thing that is mandatory for the Compendium is that you must be open to new members or have a public-facing/accessible facet. There's no point advertising a community if no one can join it in some way!

I want to put my community on the compendium but I only have x number of members —

Also totally okay! People don't start with large communities. Activity is a must but, whether your server has two or two thousand members, if you're looking for new people to join, I'd love to help you find people.

I want to put my community on the compendium but I worry its too niche?

Okay, and? If your Eorzean Fishing Alliance has four members but you roleplay every second weekend, I still want to know about it.

What resources/communities can I add if I'm not the owner of them?

Mutual consent is extremely important to me, so anything that isn't a large-scale community OR a publicly accessible resource must be endorsed by the owner/admin/moderators in order to be added to the compendium. I operate under the assumption that a resource posted to a public space (tumblr, googledocs, youtube, etc) is open to all. A large-scale community is one with a significant member count or openly advertises itself as being accessible to everyone for whatever purpose it serves. If in doubt, please get in touch with me. I'm happy to contact your community owners for you!

How active does a community need to be?

If you find a community has not been active in about two/three months, send me a message and I'll take a look at it. Communities have ebbs and flows, especially event spaces that may take hiatuses depending on member interest/life events. I'm not strict in my implementation provided a space isn't dead. If a link or anything is broken, absolutely contact me about that.

I have [insert a question not stated here]?

No drama! Send me an ask or use the #Compendium channel in my Discord!

[roopnavarro]

Spotting Misogyny in the Mad Max Fandom: A Handy Guide

What IS Misogyny

Pull up any Mad Max Facebook group, the comments section on the official Furiosa marketing posts, or the comments section on any Furiosa video on YouTube. You'll find whiners screeching things like "boohoo we can't even have Max in Mad Max BECAUSE OF WOKE." You'll see them blaming the movie's modest box office returns on the fact that the movie has an "ICKY GIRL PROTAGONIST WITH COOTIES." If you get really unlucky when seeing misogynistic content, you might even find some really gross dirty AI deepfake pics of ATJ or Charlize as Furiosa.

What is NOT Misogyny

An artist drew some characters that aren't Furiosa. AND/OR The fandom likes some male characters from Furiosa. If you feel the need to consider this misogyny, consider the following points: 1. Waffles vs. pancakes. If someone says "I love waffles!" it's absurd to read into that message and assume it carries the hidden meaning of "I hate pancakes!" If someone draws some male characters from "Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga," it's equally absurd to assume they're doing this as a malicious and misogynistic act against Furiosa. ALSO If you think "No Furiosa in this pic = misogyny," then do you think "No Big Jilly, Fang, or other POC character in fan art = racist"? I'm guessing no. Because that would be silly. And probably because you're just morally grandstanding and slinging bad-faith accusations as a way to justify your temper tantrum about not getting free content of your blorbo. ----- 2. Everyone making fan art for "Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga" is someone who saw the movie and was passionate about it, despite it being an under-marketed movie that didn't strike gold at the box office. Most of us didn't have any IRL friends that saw the movie. For those of us who followed the hype (or lack thereof) leading up to the film, there was a bunch of backlash from actual misogynists over the film just straight-up existing. (Like all those manbaby whiners on the gamergate grifter side of YouTube) . And it's not like the fandom is riding a cultural tidal wave — the people making fan art are genuinely expressing their love for the film and its universe. We're not farming internet points or drawing these "popular male characters" for some nefarious purpose. Some people just happen to attach to different characters. Does that bother you? Learn to blacklist tags. ----- 3. If you wanna go fight misogyny in the MM fandom, go over to Facebook and Reddit and get into an internet slapfight with one of the many middle-aged neckbeards screaming shit like "MAD MAX HAS GONE WOKE REEEEEEE." But nah, it's probably easier to send shitty anon asks to artists, isn't it? What do you think you're doing? Do you think you're owed an apology because someone made high-effort fan art, but without your blorbo? Do you think you're creating some kind of positive change in the world or the fandom by whinging anonymously in the ask box of an artist? ----- 4. There's plenty of content of Furiosa (the character.) Aside from there being, y'know, a whole damn movie dedicated to her, she was pretty much Tumblr's darling from 2015-2016, and remains a popular character for art and fic. Yay! That's great! Go feast on those! Every artist in this fandom is not obligated to feed you. We all have our fixations. And if you want that content so damn badly, make it yourself or pay someone to. ----- 5. Also, if you feel the need to go through someone's blog to see if they've reblogged enough Furiosa to pass your litmus test, you're being a weirdo. Stop it. Get some help. What are you, a cop? Do you think you can just pull random artists over and go through their reblogs to determine their "guilt" or "innocence," with regards to your accusations? It's as if you're a highway patrol officer checking out someone's history of traffic violations when determining whether to issue them a speeding ticket.

-----

So there you have it. TL;DR, it's some deeply terminally online clown behavior to attach moral weight to how many ATJ gifs and Furiosa drawings someone has on their blogs. Quit slinging bad-faith assumptions at fellow members of the fandom.

[cosmicstarlatte]

Customer Service (Obey Me!)

━━━━━━━━━━ ✦ ━━━━━━━━━━

They try contacting customer service. 🤷‍♂️

»Characters: Demon Bros

»Tags: Certified Shitpost™️, Pathetic Lucifer is my favorite Lucifer

»Notes: It's been a while since I've done a shitpost bulleted fic so ♡reblogs♡ are appreciated. I've had this wip since March apparently? 💀

Lucifer:

A hand on his hip and the phone in the other

This man means business

"Don't talk to me, I'm trying to keep my level of anger"

Held onto his anger for two hours waiting for the next agent

The annoying hold music only fueled him

Tried to be reasonable with the agent when he got patched through

But they were new

"Look, just get me your manager."

Waited another half hour for them

The problem got fixed rather quickly actually

smirked in satisfaction...Lucifer always wins.

If only he noticed the two stuck pages in the manual, he would've not wasted his morning

Mammon:

If he wasn't broke he would've paid someone else to make the call

Waited for an hour but it felt like eternity

"Yeah ain't there a satisfaction guarantee on this anyway!? The customers always right!"

Tried to get a replacement for his earbuds

And a refund while he was at it

Scammy? What?? Nooo....

"They fell in the wash! It's not my fault! Did I get insurance? Who has the money for that?"

Him and the agent went back and forth for a while

The agent finally caved and promised to replace the earbuds

"Finally! Ya better send 'em quick! -click-"

...

He realized he never gave the agent his address & had to start the process all over again

Levi:

Lol

Tried online chat but his specific issue needed a real agent because...of course it would

Tried to pay one of his brothers to make the call for him

They rather stab themselves or wage war against Diavolo than call customer service

Took anxiety medication before trying to call

Waited three hours on hold but played something soothing in the meantime

helloooo ruri and friends crossing

He stopped when he heard the hold music stop

"Hello thank you for calling Akuz-"

click

"It's not that important."

Satan:

This is how a pro does it.jpg

Drank his little coffee and ate his fresh little pastry

See, he set an alarm to call customer service right when they open their lines

Had the number typed and ready to go with a press

BEEPBEEPBEEPBEEP

Finally!

-dialing tone-

"Hello. Your wait time is 2 hours and-"

...

...

...

Slammed his phone on the floor and it broke

Went to go fight the company in person

His issue got fixed

The company had to tighten their security after this incident

Asmo:

Is that one lucky demon that happens to get patched through quickly

He was having problems with his devilgram account verification

Just as he started speaking about his issue the agent freaked out

Turns out they were a huge fan and could automatically tell it was the REAL™️ Asmo speaking

The issue got fixed and Asmo stayed talking with the agent because they sounded really cute

One thing led to another and...it went from a customer service hotline to a phone sex one real quick

This always happens when he calls customer service akskjfksls

Beel:

Collected all the snacks he had

Even cooked an entire feast

He needed everything he could get before making the dreaded call

After an hour of waiting (and barely any snacks left) he finally got to an agent!

It was a pleasant experience for both sides

Beel is getting sent replacements for his shoes plus a discount voucher for his next purchase

güd boi™️ as usual

Belphie:

Almost fell asleep while waiting

The music soothed him, they had classical music playing

He's not really sure how long he waited if he's being honest

When he finally got to the agent he sounded so weak the agent was concerned

"Mm? No I'm always like ...losing... consciousness ...it's normal...zzz..."

The agent was still so concerned they sent someone to the HOL to check on him

Beel ended up making the call for him

⬦You might also like: Coconut︱Devil-Mart⭐︱Waffle House

[weaverreaver42]

Luigi Mangione is going to be found guilty.

Let's not beat around the bush, we all know this is rigged against him- and by extension all of us. Acting like there's any real justice in America is asking to look like an idiot at this point.

If anyone is still arguing about what's "legal", they don't need to be involved in the conversation anymore. Laws are only meant to exist if we allow them to, and we shouldn't do so if the system that enforces those laws exist just to exploit us. American Governance and capitalism have become nothing more than a parasitic cyst on the lives of anyone it touches, and it's time we act like it.

We shouldn't be shouting from the rooftops, we need to be rioting in the streets. We can't just argue online, we need to have our voices heard in public everywhere that any politician, "news" outlets, and C.E.Os are around to flinch in response. We don't just need to send a message, that was what Mangione did. What we need is to get violent and force change, to make sure no one can afford to waffle on this issue.

People are dying, homeless, broke, and without hope. None of which have to be the case, but remain the default for as long as we allow it to be. We have to come together, get rid of the problem, rid ourselves of the filth in governments businesses and our sources of information. Don't reblog this, that isn't enough. Talk to people who you know feel the same way as you, remove all doubt in each others minds about what needs to happen next, and get rid of the parasites killing our homes.

Coordinate, Cull, Cleanse. It's time to end these atrocities once and for all.

[littleredsonja]

Houses Of Witchcraft

Update 30-10-2023:

Added Chinese translation (Thank you Mieli and Orchard Team!)

Update 31-05-2023:

Added Polish translation (Thank you Krzydkowy!)

I have been working on this for several weeks and I can finally release my new mod, "Houses of Witchcraft" (HOW). Version 1.0 includes:

4 different Houses of Witchcraft that your sims and NPC spellcasters can join. Each House has different strengths and weaknesses, different bonuses and modifiers. Rogue spellcasters that have not been sorted into one of the Houses have a very hard time learning magic. To join or leave a House talk with one of the Sages (a new menu with new interactions is included inside the "Magic" menu). You can also join a House if you buy the reward trait.

Add NPC spellcasters to a House or make them leave with the included cheats menu (shift+click on any NPC spellcaster).

Rebalance in Witchcraft XP and Charge for more interesting gameplay.

Familiars provide now different bonuses to skills and buffs to spellcasters sorted into different Houses.

A new Skill with 15 levels, "Witchcraft Studies". By studying your textbooks you will learn a lot about the Magic World. Certain levels unlock new interactions and recipes. A higher level in this subject will give your sims a better chance for positive results and rewards during events and rabbit hole interactions.

A LOT of lore about the Magic World, creatures, famous spellcasters, gossip and much more. Your sims will learn about it when talking with other spellcasters, going into rabbit holes and adventures, and reading Witchcraft Studies textbooks.

New activities for spellcasters, from attending a Quidditch match to visiting shops or exploring dangerous places, where you can get rewards, meet other spellcasters, or sometimes being bitten by a book… Victory or Defeat will depend on your skills, knowledge of spells and potions, and of course a little bit of luck. You can find the activities in a new menu in your phone.

New custom potions, including the mysterious "Potion of WaterBreathing", that you will discover during your adventures and studies.

New advanced ingredients for potions, that you can obtain from other common things such as Motes or Seashells.

You can brew herbalism remedies in your cauldron now.

A new lot trait, "Harnocks School of Witchcraft". You can add this trait wherever you want, it will provide bonuses to learning and practicing any kind of magic and alchemy, and make the lot more "magical".

More than 10 new social interactions exclusive for spellcasters. You can tell jokes about Muggles, argue about your favorite Quidditch team, share your knowledge about the Magic World, enthuse about your new broom and many more! All the new interactions are in a new menu, "Talk about Magic" inside the "Magic" menu.

And much much much more that I have on the works and I will be adding to the mod very soon, so stay tuned! Also, you can expect new spells soon 😊

Special thanks to mlyssimblr for allowing me to use her "Pufferhead" custom content for the names and art for the Houses. Go check her awesome content in her page!: Pufferhead Special thank also to Icemunmun, MizoreYukii, Frankk, Lot51, Kuttoe, Waffle, Pankake, Lumpinou and everybody in "creator musings", "Deaderpool" and "Sims after Dark" discords for always being so nice and helpful when i ask silly questions, and for the suggestions on how to improve some of the feature in this mod. Thank you Crashdown117 for the testing and feedback on the mod. Thank you also to Scarlet, Luth, Holodeck, meg and the other Mod Heralds and Mod Hunters for always posting and reblogging my mods, even when they are very small. And a very big 💜 THANK YOU 💜 for reading this and using my mods.

If you have suggestions for how to improve the mod or if you find issues please contact me here or on Discord (@LittleRedSonja). You can leave a comment if you open the Dashboard or send me a message if you click on “ask” (lateral menu). You can also give it a “like” if you enjoy the mod 💜

LANGUAGES:

English

German (by Crashdown117 💜)

Polish (by Krzydkowy 💜)

Chinese (by Mieli and Orchard Team 💜) Link

New translations are always welcome! If you would like to translate the mod please contact me and let me know, don’t be shy 😘.

COMPATIBILITY:

This mod will conflict with mods that remove or change the buffs from familiars because my mod already does this in a much more extensive way, and will expand this even further in the near future. Other than that, it should be compatible with everything else.

REQUIREMENTS:

Packs: Realm of Magic. The features included in the "Potion of WaterBreathing" require "Island Living" to work. Herbalism requires "Outdoor Retreat".

XML Injector: It is used by A LOT of other mods, so it is very possible that you already have it installed. If not, the only thing you need to do is download it, unzip the zip file, and put both the .ts4script and the .package files right inside your mods folder. That is it. If you already have it you do not need to download it again.

INSTALLATION:

Download the mod and add the file to your mods folder. If you are updating remove the old file and put the new one in your mods folder.

LINKS:

LittleRedSonja_ROM_Houses_Of_Witchcraft_(HOW) XML Injector

Chinese translation

[amateur-art-critic]

Assigned TERF by trans women (or; we should teach people about Occams Razor)

So this is a new development. I got accused of being a TERF for writing this on a post I reblogged:

So I'm a TERF because I think TMA/TME as terms have set back trans solidarity? Because I think TMA and TME just reinvent the gender binary? That's TERF-y to you?

Sure.

But there's more; OP decided to comment as well;

Me when I'm not a TERF

Yes, that is the point of my blog. To hate TERFs. Because I was harassed by TERFs at one point.

and then her pinned is signaling how opposed to radfeminism [she is].

Radfems/gendercrits/TERFs are the same breed and I use the terms synonymously. There's nothing more to it.

bitch your header has a play on the terfs term TIM.

Yes, because I was trying to co-opt their language to piss them off. @/butchbarbieagainstterfs was the one to introduce me to the concept of using FIT, Feminist Identified Transphobe, as an alternative to TERF.

And if anything, it's a play on TIF (trans identified female), because it uses the exact same letters as FIT.

Your entire blog is predicated on transfem exclusionism

No it's fucking not? Never have I excluded transfems and trans women. I focus on transmasc and trans men's issues because they fucking apply to me.

This is the most "i like pancakes"/"so you hate waffles?" argument ever.

you ain't slick

Neither are you.

Then @/june-egbert-official decided to add onto OPs reblogs with an "analysis" of my bio, from the view of me being a TERF;

"Shrödinger's Woman" - Shrödinger's Cat was a thought experiment of being unable to measure something without investing it [...] - in other words they want to be allowed to look at your junk.

Or, maybe, we Occams Razor this: maybe I am both a woman and not a woman. You won't know unless you ask, but everyone always assumes and argues I'm one or the other.

In other words: I'm fucking nonbinary, you dumb fuck. I'm not a woman and I am also not not a woman, because I'm also not a man. And saying I'm "Shrödinger's Woman" is a subtle nod to TERFs assuming I'm either a cis woman, a trans man (who they see as women) or a trans woman (who they see as men, but I don't) when I argue with them.

I don't think I have ever in my life seen a more bad faith argument.

Aforementioned TIF as a play on TERFs TIM shit.

Well, if you knew anything about TERF lore outside them targeting trans women and transfems, you would know that "TIF" is already a term coined by gendercrits for trans men and transmascs.

I recognize that it's probably just a spelling mistake, but I just want to clarify in case it isn't. But, if it is;

But I digress.

Actively calling out where TERFs should go.

Or, and bare with me here, I want TERFs off of Tumblr. That's literally what I say in that sentence in my bio! Can you not read between the lines when I call TERFs an "invasive species" and how they "cause an imbalance to the tumblr ecosystem"?

Tumblr is the only social media left that I feel safe on and I don't want TERFs to poison it for me. So I would rather send them to an echo chamber of equally insane people than to other popular social media.

Just how much bad faith do you have to read my bio with to jump to this conclusion?

Calls themself a female pink and purple toed tarantula (generally considered "feminine colors, for what that's worth) [...]

...I just fucking like purple and pink. And I like spiders.

As for the "female" part, I'm literally just stating the sex I was assigned at birth. I may be female, but that doesn't mean I'm a woman.

Once again; Occams Razor.

[...] and, probably at least a little tangential, they become aggressive against males this time of year.

That's not tangential, it's just straight up wrong. Not the spider facts, but that you think that it's implying I'm aggressive towards males because I have a female spider motif. It's not symbolic of anything other than that I like spiders and that I was assigned female at birth.

To end this, I would just like to ask both @/june-egbert-official and @/0w0tsuki, in the small chance either of you are stalking my blog and reading this; Why did you think I was a TERF? Do you just see all AFABs who disagree with you as gendercrit radfems?

Or was it because I believe that transandrophobia is real you see me as a TERF? Because I can't find any other reason as to why you would call me a TERF other than the fact that I'm nonbinary transmasc and I disagree with trans women.

[murdermepeacefully]

John Carver Headcanons

For the ever amazing @fingersinmyhair 💕I hope you like them~

NOTE: Some of these may be spoilers for the movie regarding who the killer is, so please don't read my post as a gauge for if you'd enjoy it if that would bother you.

These are of course my own personal opinion, but feel free to reblog, add onto them, ask questions about them, or add them to the ones you accept yourself! I absolutely love hearing from others on their thoughts.

꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎

Things Inspired By The Movie:

Has a burning hatred for waffles after the massacre at Rightmart.

You see that table setting? This man is a Martha Stewart stan.

Prefers the intimacy of an ax or knife as a weapon, when possible.

Definitely ran track at least part of high school.

Hella destructive anger. This man would 100% punch a hole in the wall when pissed.[*🌶️More under Spicy]

Would love rage rooms as a result.

Mildly perfectionist mindset.

Enjoys calligraphy

Purely speculation, but I would absolutely believe if he tampered with the float to result in additional chaos at the parade.

Definitely get the vibes that while Kathleen's fate was determined from the start given lines such as "I'm sure you'll make an excellent dinner, Kathleen", the pushback she gave to Rightmart being closed on Thanksgiving made it so that he ensured she would be awake when she went into the oven as punishment.

Chose to use John Carver mask/imagery due to Thomas's use of it for Rightmart commercials, both in the past and the year that he's committing the murders.

Things Inspired by Fandom Content:

[None ATM, but leaving this space for if/when I think of some!]

Random Things:

Despite enjoying baking, he doesn't have a huge sweet tooth. He prefers things a bit more savory.

Likes making dinners from scratch, despite the extra work

Enjoys using his authority as sheriff to control those around him.

Drinks his coffee black.

The only hinge this man has is one he got in a box of corn flakes. He's very well-practiced at faking it, however. [Edit: I've had a few people mention this didn't make sense to them, so I wanted to say it was my attempt at a creative way to say he's unhinged because the hinge he did have was a very cheap/low quality one, like a toy in a box of cereal, but that he's good at seeming more stable]

Likes animals in general [No preference re: cat or dog.]

Spicy 🌶️🔞:

Oh this man absolutely loves using handcuffs or ropes on a partner.

Enjoys taking photos/videos of a partner, and will reward them if they're well behaved and send him nudes or videos without being asked.

Enjoys the idea of 'stealing' a person from their partner/convincing them to cheat with him. [Once you're his, however, you're his and his alone forever]

Absolutely turned on by the idea of breaking someone completely to make them his sex slave, who exists only to give him pleasure.

Blood kink, 100%. Likes making partners bleed, using blood as lube, seeing his partner bloody, etc. No hard limits when it comes to blood.

Would carry a bottle of his partner's blood with him to use as lube spur of the moment if he can't get it fresh.

Has absolutely jerked off in his patrol car before.

Got a custom-made dildo shaped like a gun to fuck his partners with.

Likes to make you watch him fuck you. [Be it from angle or using a mirror]

Loves to degrade and humiliate during sex.

Loves to make his partner a mess, but if you make him one he'll make you clean him up with your tongue.

While the idea of seeing his partner pregnant with his child is a turn on, the actuality of it isn't something he could easily handle due to the trauma of losing his baby with Amanda.

Absolutely would wear a shibari harness under his uniform for the fun of it.

Form of punishment he'd absolutely use was to drug his partner with an aphrodisiac and set a timer, to see if they'll behave and wait until the timer goes off to touch themselves despite how horny they are.

Gets incredibly turned on by begging.

*🌶️ After punching said hole in the wall, there is a chance he would push his partner into it so that they're stuck in the wall and completely at his mercy.

[roadhogsbigbelly]

can you see where she says “private”? private sexual activities, between consenting adults? like being private in their own homes, like you said?

and the abuse you’re talking about ISNT “part of the package”, there is literally no reason to normalize it in this way, you are implying there is a ~dangerous slippery slide~ between kink and abuse like a republican where there fucking isn’t. i think those kinks ““stop”” there because thats where they go from something between two consenting parties and abuse. risk aware consent matters first and foremost, which isn’t possible in an abusive situation.

and as for why she reblogged it, if you were looking around that time, you would’ve noticed it was in the midst of another trans woman getting pedojacketed and called out for bullshit! kind of crazy, but she reblogged the post for the reasons she described on it, instead of your fanfiction headcanon that casts her as a pedophile apologist.

this is the last ask i'm going to repond to and than i'm going to block you because it's very clear nothing i'm going to do or say is going to change your mind and my mutuals are genuinely concerned for my mental health. so yes the post did not say "pedophilia is good" most posts don't, most posts also don't say "transphobia is good" or "antisemintism is good" or "zionism is good" or "racism is good" must people use dogwhiles of language that's seem reasonable but with context of how the person is and they're other beliefs makes the post bad or even rethinks why you liked the original post at all.

you yourself have called out people for a reblogging a post that used transmisogynistic dog whistles. as you should, but people could use the exact same defenses you and her are using to dismiss criticism of the post. "what am i expected to do a background check on every post i reblog" and "i never said anything bad about trans women so why are you lumping me in with the person i reblogged" and like no not the inherently harmless ones but the one's that discuss gender politics or kinks or race, yeah you kind of have to AT least be able to spot dogwhistles, and when you're informed what the post actually means and you ignore it, that doesn't help your case.

they're are many posts that seem feminist and perfectly accurate but than when you find out when op talks about "men" they're actually talking about trans woman that obviously should make you reevaluate the post. very often i'll see people being like "a terf wrote this post so i stole it and it's transmisogynistic but with "terfs dni' added onto it.

the post isn't just bad BECAUSE a pedophile wrote, but the fact that it was SHOULD make you reavulate the post and the message it's sending. again this wasn't a post about pancakes or waffles or whatever it was a post about ageplay and incest kink written by someone who has a lot of reason for people to agree with them. this actually matters.

[nuriiz134]

Irresistible

so um its my first time posting and all. so um i am gonna write ffs (for enhypen only hyung line please) and all like smut and fluffs u can put in ur requests in my dms and and asks. and um thats all and umm i will be writng dual povs um liek if anyone wants to be in my taglist u can just dm me or like just out in asks or reblog whicheevr u want. btw i am like a beginner writer... so there might be errors and stuff smtime may not make sense but please be kind thankk uu

ya'll just wanted to take a moment to appreciate for liking my blog. to everyone. thanksss

summary- jake is your roomate, y/n and jake has a lot of sexual tension between them. after weeks of not trying touch or kiss each other the thin line of resistance breaks and um yeah.

pairing- y/n x jake

warnings- fluff,kissing,groping,ass smacking,making out,cursing (i think thats all let me know if there is more)

genre-romance,fluff

y/n pov and Jake's pov

Y/N pov Our friends left soon later in the day leaving me and Jake alone in the silence of our apartment. These few weeks Jake has been looking irresistible. Our sexual tension just seems to be increasing more day by day its like everytime we are in the room together there is there feeling in the air going around asking for something. I am hella sure Jake is aware of that too. Jake Pov:

"Care for some food?, I am starving." I asked her. She nodded. "I am gonna make us some waffles and fruit okay?" "Ya" I could feel her presence beside as she placed herself to sit on the counter beside me. I could feel her prying eyes on me. oh what I would to see those hazel brown orbs roll back when i fuck her senseless. the effect she has on me. things i would do for and to her. these few weeks have been too hard. the sexual tension. we can't stay in the same room without looking at each other. its been too irresistible. today she looked as enticing as ever in those shorts and that tank top. oh! i want to kiss her all over. i want to kiss her? maybe i will go for it today. one time it won't hurt will it?

I reached out to grab the spatula kept beside her. As I reached over to grab the spatula. I felt the slightest brush of her hands over sending jolts down my spine. fuck my conscience i can't And the next thing I knew I had pulled her by the waist and our lips were inches apart. "You know I can't handle the tension anymore, everytime something happens, you push me away ." "Then don't pull away I ain't pushing you today" she said in the most tantalizing voice ever. And the last string of my conscience tore. I crashed my lips onto hers. I could feel her body arch into mine. As if it was meant to be. Y/n's lips moved in a rhythm with mine hungrily as mine moved with hers. My hands traveled on her body to explore her beauty. I met my eyes with her as if asking for consent. "Can I?" She nodded. She doesn't know what she does to me. She is like a drug to me I had had her.I wanted more of her. I almost moaned at the feeling as her hands slid up my chest and then traveled to the back of my neck as I felt her hands on my neck I groaned softly. I started trailing kisses down her jaw to her neck. As my hands roamed around her body. I softly smacked her ass earning a moan from her. My lips went back to her lips and they fitted together like a piece of puzzle. My tongue asked permission to her mouth for her entrance and she immediately let it enter. My tongue fighting for dominance along with hers as our tongue danced together for the next few minutes. It was like a dream come true. To have her, the most stunning woman in my arms. Her body against mine our chests fitting together perfectly, like an interlocking puzzle piece, and I knew that I had found the perfect partner. Our breathing was heavy as our bodies were pressed against one another. I felt my heart beating fast with passion. I could feel her heartbeat against mine as our lips separated to give each other air. *We looked into each other's eyes and I brushed a few loose strands of her hair behind her ear. Our breathing slowed down and our bodies separated slightly, but my hands still clung to her body. I then leaned my head on her shoulder and I rested on her. My heart was beating loudly and my breaths were still a bit heavy. I felt her hand brush against mine as I wrapped my other arm around her, pulling her closer to me. She snuggled her head onto my chest.* Then suddenly I could feel my phone ring in my pocket breaking us out of our trance. I immediately snapped back to my senses. As I realized what I had done I immediately let go of her. I ran back to my room.

Y/n's pov After he literally ran back to the room and left me on the kitchen counter as a breathing mess. I was flustered after kissing how could he just leave me like that? I don't think it was a mistake. AND HOW COULD HE FUCKING LEAVE ME LIKE THAT?! HE GODFUCKING KISSED ME AND WE MADE OUT AND HE JUST LEFT ME LIKE THAT ON COUNTER AFTER KISSING ME?! HOW COULD THAT JERK. I went back to my room and lied down on my bed. I touched my lips with my hands still tasting his feeling on my lips reminiscing the feeling. I wanted to kiss his soft lips again. The way he ran out I actually thought I did something wrong maybe he is just flustered.

[illadvisedselfships]

I have a very general ask to rattle off before I leave the house!! I've been revolving the idea of sending this in my mind for a few days, but I think that last post you reblogged is a sign that I should just do it XD Because it kind of relates to my questions... sorry if it seems disjointed, I'm sort of rushing to get it out of my system ^^

When you imagine anything with your F/Os, is it you you that you're picturing? Or like. An idealized version of yourself? Is anything about her different or is she just straight up *you*? I've had this image in my head for so long of someone who thinks like me, but looks and acts quite different - almost like an OC. I think I'm getting a bit better about this though, I've been working on making my Sim self and it's helping 😅😅

From looking through this blog, it seems like you usually imagine your F/Os with you in the real world? Do you ever imagine yourself in their universe? For me I almost always imagine myself as a character in their universe!

I'm still warming up to the idea of F/Os... but for as a long as I can remember I've had daydream scenarios with soooo many different characters over the years. But I always just considered them maladaptive daydream scenarios 🙈🙈🙈 I LOVE the enthusiasm you have for your F/Os, though!! <3

Marinerainbow or anyone else is welcome to share their thoughts too, but there's no pressure to do so of course :D

💛💕💛💕💛💕 I love this ask, its so interesting! ^^

First of all- @marinerainbow , what are your thoughts here? ^^

As for me: First of all I think with F/O stuff you can - of course, - be whatever the hell you wanna be!! If thats an idealised or just, plain, fictional version of yourself- ball!! ^^ For me I generally just imagine myself. Though, admittedly, a slightly more confident, and open version of myself XD

As for the w o r l d, I usually imagine- it depends on the day XD Here are the various worlds I imagine myself in with them XD I put them under the cut cuz it partly answers the question and its also just me waffling about my various ongoing fantasies 😅

All of them: Some weird in-between world set in London with Cruella. Somehow the other 3 live there too now in this one 😅

All of them: Variant of same in-between world except I live in Maine with Jim because I l o v e the idea of living near a lake or in the bush/woods or something- I swear, if I could live out in the sticks I'd never be anxious ^^ Usually in this one, Otis lives in the basement XD

All of them: Different variant of same in-between world except I just live in Aus this time and am upholding 4 different long distance relationships 🤣 XD

Jim: The Lake Placid universe. Yes, I imagine myself in the universe! ^^ I'm not a character in the story, though, I generally imagine I'm cursed or the multiverse glitched or something and I ended up dropped in the last fictional universe I watched on TV XD So I'm just there, knowing e x a c t l y what happens and when in this story but keeping my mouth sealed s h u t about it (*cough* while shooting my shot with Jim) XD

Jim (Variant): At the moment I'm playing with a variant of this one where a version of me does already exist in the Lake Placid universe when I get there- and she's a... shall we say... adult movie star XD 🤣 Its fun!

Otis: The H1000C universe. Same as the Lake Placid one above. I end up in this universe at Spaulding's petrol station with a friend from the real world (Who either knows the story or doesn't- both can be equally fun cuz I'm either freaking out with them or freaking out for the both of us XD) and get wrapped up in the story with the main victims while trying to get the hell out before Otis sees me cuz n o I don't wanna get m u r d e r e d thank you very much-

Any of them: Switcheroo. They get dumped in t h i s (o u r) universe/timeline. And I have to keep them hidden so no one recognises them as their actor in public.

Any of them: Switcheroo Variant. We both end up in a separate universe and have to work together to get the hell out. Catch? This universe already has a version of them (A different character by the same actor. For example if the focus F/O is Jim it could be the ANOES universe. Or if the focus F/O is Otis, it could be Texas Chainsaw Massacre! XD) and possibly a different version of me as well and we have to avoid meeting/making eye contact with these other versions in order to avoid a fault in the space time continuum or whatever 😅 (And also avoid other problems that might come along with meeting characters like Freddy Krueger or Inkubus or Chop Top Sawyer🙃)

So yes... I do like to use the real me in my F/O fantasies (feels more personal for me ^^) but its not always the real world XD Its not always their fictional world. A lot of the time its just random 😅 Its completely up to you individually what you do with your daydreaming! ^^ It is s o so individual and self indulgent.

I hope this helps you? Or was interesting? 😅😂 I wish you so much luck in your future F/O-ing! XD Its all good fun and it can be comforting too ^^ And I wanna hear all about it if you ever wanna gush! Here are your free gush tickets 🎫🎟🎫🎟🎫🎟🎫🎟🎫🎟 They're infinite and theirs no expiry date! ^^

[gatheredfates]

Hi! My name is Sea, and I have an unhealthy obsession with taking on large community projects! This is my Final Fantasy XIV Community Compendium, focusing on linking as many XIV writing/roleplaying discords, forums, events, free companies and resources as I can get my hands on. While the inspired by and predominately tailored for roleplayers, it should have something for anyone looking to engage creatively with the game in some capacity. ⭐

If you'd like to simply check out what the Compendium is all about and miss my waffling below, any of the links on this post will take you there — but this is a handy one! A reblog also goes a huge way to increase my reach and find communities/resources; you're also welcome to share this post with people not on Tumblr who might be looking for communities/resources or have something to add.

Why a compendium, Sea?

In my opinion, the way people engage with fandom and communities has changed. It was once extremely common for people to hop onto the XIV Roleplaying Forum or find people looking for contact on Tumblr, but most of these resources have shifted to Discord. While Discord is great for keeping a community when you have it, the isolation of these communities into hidden, secular spaces doesn’t do a lot to help people find them in the first place and creates an air of loneliness/disconnect for new players or people looking to find specific communities. I don’t believe that a person should necessarily be a part of x amount of servers to find the one that suits them, nor that all communities should necessarily be on Discord — or just plain hard to find. However, while this is currently the standard, I’d like to try and help these communities be fostered and seen in a place accessible to basically anyone with an internet connection. If one community has benefited from this document, then I have done my part.

This is my monthly drive to showcase the Compendium but find new things to add! A lot of the below is already on the document, but I split communities/resources into four distinct spaces:

Large-scale community discords such as the XIV Reddit Discord, Hunts, GPOSE promotions and broad-space roleplay servers that harbour a large number of people and are publicly available to all. These may not have an RP focus but will assist in other aspects of the game.

Free Company & community-focused servers. E.G. an Ishgardian Roleplay server whose mission is to foster a community for Ishgardian characters; an EU server created to help players struggling with timezones. This also includes event discords such as fight clubs, markets, cafes, etc.

Friend/casual servers that have a roleplay element but may be just a group of people looking to find others to hang out and do content with.

Miscellaneous. Likely to be less community servers and more resources such as lore compilations, how-to guides, gposing techniques, boosting blogs, etc. These may get their own dedicated section later.

Want to submit? You can either fill out the google form here, send me an ask with the relevant information contained on the Compendium, or join my Discord at SEAFLOOR (21+ only)!

Is my space suitable for the Compendium? Most of the time, yes! Below the read more is some more information/stipulations. Again, all accessible on the document! 🪸

Below are the following things I do not accept on the Compendium:

Personal/Single-Character LFC ads.

Content intended for or can be used for bullying, harassment and OOC gossip. E.g. ‘Secrets’ blogs, receipts, callout posts, etc. This does not include IC tabloid blogs used to generate RP.

Communities that do not have an RP/writing element (large-scale exempt).

Anything I find personally distasteful or goes against the spirit of this project.

Common-sense rule applies.

FAQ.

I want to put my community on the compendium but we have an application process. Is this okay?

Yes! Just note somewhere in your application that's a requirement. The only thing that is mandatory for the Compendium is that you must be open to new members or have a public-facing/accessible facet. There's no point advertising a community if no one can join it in some way!

I want to put my community on the compendium but I only have x number of members —

Also totally okay! People don't start with large communities. Activity is a must but, whether your server has two or two thousand members, if you're looking for new people to join, I'd love to help you find people.

I want to put my community on the compendium but I worry its too niche?

Okay, and? If your Eorzean Fishing Alliance has four members but you roleplay every second weekend, I still want to know about it.

What resources/communities can I add if I'm not the owner of them?

Mutual consent is extremely important to me, so anything that isn't a large-scale community OR a publicly accessible resource must be endorsed by the owner/admin/moderators in order to be added to the compendium. I operate under the assumption that a resource posted to a public space (tumblr, googledocs, youtube, etc) is open to all. A large-scale community is one with a significant member count or openly advertises itself as being accessible to everyone for whatever purpose it serves. If in doubt, please get in touch with me. I'm happy to contact your community owners for you!

How active does a community need to be?

If you find a community has not been active in about two/three months, send me a message and I'll take a look at it. Communities have ebbs and flows, especially event spaces that may take hiatuses depending on member interest/life events. I'm not strict in my implementation provided a space isn't dead. If a link or anything is broken, absolutely contact me about that.

I have [insert a question not stated here]?

No drama! Send me an ask or use the #Compendium channel in my Discord!

[purgatory-hotel]

new pinned post ogh

hi everyone 😁 this is my blog for my hazbin hotel rewrite, purgatory hotel! I post updates on Instagram under the username purgatory_hotel. there's a mini hiatus since I'm working on finishing the first chapter then uploading it bit by bit

for as long as I've known about it, hazbin hotel hasn't really entered my mind like. at all. until the show came out. this is because I kept seeing other people's reimagining of these characters and so I got invested (and also I recognised Keith David so I decided to watch it 😭)

I don't really like the show to be honest. some bits made me laugh but it wasn't really my cup of tea, although the concept itself is good!

uhhh. uh byf and all that:

purgatory hotel isn't a project made from spite (even if the spite store arc of curb your enthusiasm was one of the funniest /silly) but it's just me fixating on something for no real reason and getting silly with it

I don't really post criticism unless it's relevant to my rewrite or if I feel like yapping. however I would like to run over Valentino and canon Stolas with a combine harvester. if that upsets you then I suggest you stay away

I don't think ph is "better" than hazbin hotel either. obviously I prefer it because it's my own project, but again this isn't a thing I did out of spite, even if I personally don't really like the creator

hellaverse fans are free to interact/follow, just be nice and civil

I'm an adult (20) this isn't an adults only account but I'd say it's like,,, 13+ for the most part? anything sexual will have a warning and obviously won't be for little uns, but I doubt I'll post anything that is explicitly 18+

dni. only putting this since I'm mainly on mobile and I can't block side accounts from the Tumblr app

being against certain identities such as neopronouns or xenogenders. obviously if you don't understand them then that's fine, so long as you're civil and try. I mean actively being a nob about other people's personal identity/expression

fairly obvious but transphobes, homophobes, racists, etc etc. typically I wouldn't put this but I've seen some pretty alarming posts from critics and fans alike

antis who are horrible to any and all hellaverse fans. if they're on your dni that's fine I get that, but if you harass them for liking a show then you need to get a job and/or hobby

tag guide:

#not ph - things that aren't related to purgatory hotel specifically

#viv crit - mainly reblog stuff. primarily for organisational purposes. just things for me to look back on and take into account when working on ph

#fan crit - same for viv crit but surrounding the fandom

#critception - some criticism is just straight up doo doo feces and I will waffle on about it

#other rewrites / other redesigns - self explanatory. things I like to share and/or take inspiration from

#ask to tag - if there's something that may need a warning but I'm not sure what to put. it's just sort of There. you can send me an ask or a dm telling me if you want me to put a specific tag on something. I'll tag almost anything aside from scars and food and I won't tag for more specific triggers. this is just to prevent me from getting muddled up in case I forget to tag something. this isn't me having a go at people with more specific squicks or triggers (I've many of my own)