#reblogging because it didn't get any attention rip

[acid-ixx]

I’m new, I just read your fic about neglect reader. I haven’t read through your blog yet but I am so excited after reading this fic. I am an emotional wreck right now and my curiosity is eating me alive with this question “Does reader know about Jason? Will they ever met? Ever have a platonic relationship together? Will Jason be more of a brother to reader?”

I’m sorry I speed through the fic and tears are in my eyes I couldn’t think straight BUT I notice that Jason is hardly there so I’m curious. Please this is such a brain rot, it’s way past midnight after I read this cause I keep stopping to cry.

major (?) spoilers below.

reblogs and interactions are encouraged and appreciated.

hello anon !! im so happy ppl are getting more exposed to the content i have written so far. anyways, i can't believe i also got others to cry bec i did too when i was writing 😭

anyways, to answer ur question: yes! the reader will meet jason and he would actually be the first sibling you would meet after you have left the manor. the way he would turn yandere for you is a different approach to how the others would be because in the prequel, it has been stated that you had your fair share of encounters with him.

"will they ever have a platonic relationship with him/see him as a brother?" maybe, maybe not. because your meeting with him would all be a blur to you, and jason's obsession would stem from the trauma he had experienced, causing him to be more protective of you.

you're not in your best mindset and you're vulnerable walking through the streets of gotham and all alone? oh god, only a dumbass would do that— but once the red hood recognizes your face and the way you carry yourself so pitiably, he immediately tries to take you in his arms just as he should.

but the moment you push him away? tell him to fuck off despite your drunken state? the moment you cry and tell him you could deal with everything yourself without his help or anybody else's? you just remind him of himself and that triggers his first spiral into yandere-ism.

it's the way you share trauma, the way you both feel immense anger. he should've noticed sooner because you two would've been as close as peas in a pod. and yet he failed you by being a hypocrite. you were literally taken into the manor right after his death and discarded like you were mere trash. he should've taken you away when he had the opportunity to but he was too caught up in his feat of revenge.

yet the worst part was that he had taken notice of tim before he did you, and jason had momentarily hated you too because he thought bruce had replaced him. if he had looked through that veil of contempt that he had for you, and saw just how neglected and in need of attention you are, then he would've taken you under his wing.

but he didn't, and he had done the same thing to you as most did.

so take it as you will when i say you're more or less going to be closer (albeit unwillingly) to jason than anybody else because unlike his other siblings who are bound by their vigilante duties, your big brother jason wouldn't mind shooting any creeps who think they could touch his precious angel.

and he gets it, too, angel— you hate him, you hate them all and that's valid. but you can't just walk out in the streets alone and expect to be home in one piece; so leave it to him to scout your apartment alright? leave it to your big brother jason to intimidate the goons who try to stalk you when you're not looking. even if you don't want him near you, you'll always find warm food by your table and a note reminding you to take care of yourself more often.

it hurts when you rip the paper to shreds but it breaks his heart even more if you refuse to touch the meal he would leave for you, because that probably means you saw him as danger more than anything else. and he doesn't know it, but you're already planning to make a run for it now that you're under red hood's radar.

it's obvious that you have no experience when it comes to living by yourself, so please don't fucking push him away and let him protect you from any harm. your self destructive habits only causes him to become more protective of you and it only lets him stalk you more often to ensure nobody would touch his precious angel.

just like dick, you'll be treated more like a child than that of a young adult, but at least jason has the concept of personal space compared to your eldest brother. but still, jason wishes to hold you in his arms.

heaven forbid if the joker ever got his crummy fingers on you. jason would go berserk.

little does he know, little does your family know just how much they had lost the opportunity to keep you in wraps inside the manor.

they should've never let you out in the first place.

[russellsppttemplates]

Straight from the heart (Lando Norris)

It takes a bad race for Lando to notice how much he has neglected your relationship, and he can only hope he can fix it

Note: english is not my first language. I was fighting the other piece I was writing so I jumped to this one and I did something a little bit different (* cough cough * longer) and see how it goes! I'm not sure how good this is (or how much you will want to kill me), but I promise this has a happy ending!! 🥹🫶

Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated 🤍 and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!

my masterlist

Tw: relationship struggles, curse words

Tag list: @myloverjk-blog @hiireadstuff @c-losur3

The result on the screen was not the one you hoped. Lando had a wonderful race, but a mixture of bad strategy calls, dark rain clouds appearing on the sky with only a couple of laps left to finish the race and the wrong tire compound made him lose a good number of places, cars overtaking him in the last seven laps.

"Is the race over?", you mother asked as she stepped inside the living room, carrying the curtains she had left out to dry and proceeding to hang them back in their place.

"Yes, just now", your father said as he adjusted the volume on the TV, "let me help you, darling", he offered, getting up and standing beside your mum in case she got out of balance.

"Are you going to call Lando?", your mother asked once her squinty eyes read the position he had finished in. Even though the prescription glasses were on the table, she insisted she didn't want any mishaps after she accidentally dropped her last pair while she was gardening and one of your younger cousins found a rusty frame a couple of months later when he was over.

"I'm not, I don't think - he's flying back tonight and the timezone is so different, I don't want to bother him", you blurted defensively, making up excuses as you went along with your answer, "he's doing the interviews, and I'm sure the debrief will be long and torturous - he will need his rest to fly back", you stated as you got up, "I have to check on the project I handed in on Friday, the professor said he would post the grades around this time and if we want to appel, we have to do it right away - I'll be in my bedroom".

The subject was an open wound that stung everytime you so much heard a mention of it, let one having to seem completely okay with it when it ripped through your heart.

The calendar on your wall is full of stickers, both with notes, urgent matters and things you couldn't forget. It's the last stretch, you tell yourself, one more week and then it's done and you'll have a well deserved break.

A knock on your door catches your attention as you reply with the allowance to let whoever is on the other side in, "is something wrong?", you asked. Lately, the negative side of your mind was the first one to speak.

"That's what I want to ask you - that conversation we just had downstairs was not your usual self", she sighed as she pointed to the living room, "I've noticed you haven't mentioned him much, but I don't want to intrude or offer my help because I know you don't like meddling", your mother looked for your eyes before you could fully focus on the wooden floor.

"Things have been rough between us lately", you sighed, "Lando is keeping me at a distance, and I don't know the reason why, mum", you shrugged, "I don't know if it's because I've known him all my life and the comparison is so profound, but it seems he only cares about racing and his friends, and I'm nowhere in the mix. We rarely call eachother, no texting - I know the triple headers are intense, but all I got from him were reactions to my stories and a little video from Max where he's in it and said something to me", you recalled, "I can't be the only one making an effort, can I? Either he realised where this is going and we catch it while we can, or I don't know where this is going, I don't know where we're going".

Your mother's heart broke as she saw you allow the tears you had held on to fall freely, your sleeves bunched up on your hands to wipe them, "and have you talked about this? A long, grown-up and serious conversation?", she mused.

"We have barely been with eachother, mum!", you whispered shakily as more tears got caught on your throat.

"Couples go through phases, darling - do you think me and your father was all smooth sailing?", she tried to get you to smile as she brushed your hair while she hugged you, "you need to talk to eachother, seriously and let it all out, nothing is off limits because that's how you'll get to where you need to".

You kept your head on your mother's chest, accepting her comforting hold despite being an adult. A mother's hold was truly the best.

You hoped she was right and this was something that would pass. A rough patch that you and Lando would work through a look back on with a sense of accomplishment.

This wasn't how you and Lando end, is it?

.

Max and Lando headed for the plane as soon as they left the race track, having made prior arrangements to had their luggage there waiting for them once they arrived. Max was the first to sit down and get himself comfortable on the seat, texting his girlfriend to let her know they were leaving.

"Y/N hasn't called or even texted me, nothing", Lando mumbled, "didn't she watch the race? Doesn't she know that I need her?".

Max weighed in the good and the bad that his next few words could do. He could either be honest and encourage his best friend to finally come to his senses, or keep covering the lie and perpetuate the suffering and miscommunications.

"This is not how I wanted to do this - truth be told, I never wanted to have to do it", Max rambled off.

Lando was quick to notice that there was more to it than just this instance, "you know something - she's my girlfriend, Max, if something is happening, I deserve to know", he said in an antsy tone.

"Are you really so blind to it? Have you not noticed it yet? Damn it, Lando, I've been on your side, trying to clean it up and now I'm questioning it", Max declared as Lando only grew more confused.

"What am I missing Max?", Lando snapped, even catching his own self off guard at the reaction he had.

"Mate, think about the last couple of months and whether or not you have been a good boyfriend, or even the boyfriend Y/N deserves", Max offered.

Lando wasn't expecting that answer or point of view.

The last couple of months roll through his memory as if he's watching a movie and when he tries to select the moments he spent with you, he finds himself struggling to gather any at all. He can't remember any of the times you spent together, and considering his memory isn't that bad, it could only mean those moments didn't even happen. Thinking about it, he can remember the last time he held you in his arms, just the two of you.

"Fuck!", Lando shouted, punching the arm rest.

"Glad you figured that one out almost all on your own", Max tsked, "do you really think you deserve any interaction from Y/N? Thought so", Max muttered. He didn't like the situation his friends found themselves in, and he certainly didn't feel any joy in the words he told Lando, but the truth wasn't always easy to hear.

"Seems Y/N doesn't think so either", Lando mumbled, "do you know anything? Has she told you anything?".

He wasn't sure he deserved to know, but he needed to.

"The last time I spoke to her she didn't say anything - you know how Y/N doesn't want to bother anyone with her things and getting information from her is harder than solving the world's problems -, but P and her talk here and there", Max reasoned, "she obviously won't tell me all the details but from what I can tell, Y/N has really taken a toll because of this, P is always quite upset whenever it comes up", Max offered. Quite upset wouldn't cover it, so much so that, unbeknownst to Lando, the last couple of time Max's girlfriend couldn't join them for their plans was an orchestrated excuse from her to avoid being in the same room as the McLaren driver.

"Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!", Lando groaned into his hands, "how could I not realise this was happening?".

"You want the honest, blunt truth?", Max asked and Lando nodded, "I know it's your job, but lately, it's all been about racing, and I think you've neglected Y/N ", Max offered.

McLaren had a one hundred and eighty degree turn lately. From struggling to get their cars in the points, the team had managed to turn things around to the point where P5 and P8 was considered a bad weekend for them.

With the new signings, Quadrant had grown exponentially and it had naturally drawn him to spend more time on it, and it seemed to have alienated everyone in his life that wasn't directly a part of those.

It wasn't intentional, but it didn't mean that it didn't hurt. And by the looks of it, the person Lando loved and cared about most was also the one he hurt the most.

They both sat in silence as the British drive thought about all of it. Things got so good that he didn't look back, he worked his hardest and gave every piece of himself to the cause and the new territory he was paving. Being on the podium was a common feature for him, and the race win was there, up for grabs and he wanted it. Yet, he had been dazzled by it and had let himself fly higher, his characteristic "both head and feet on the ground" posture no longer present and resulting in a degree of neglection for the things and people thay mattered to him.have always been important to me.

"How did I push away the most important person in my life and I'm just now realizing this?", Lando asked, not really expecting an answer, but rather to let out all the frustration that boiled inside him, anger soon following at his late realisation, "what's worse is that I've only come to realise this because you had to tell me - stupid, stupid, stupid".

"I don't know what you want me to tell you, mate, and frankly there isn't much I can, but look on the bright side: now you have a chance to fix it", Max tries to comfort Lando.

"What if it's too late? What if Y/N doesn't want to be with me anymore?", Lando voicesd his deepest fear. What if the anger had finally got to you and you wanted to call it quits?

"Wouldn't you be able to understand that? I don't think that is the case - I've never seen two people who love eachtoher more than you two, it's as disgusting as it it lovely most times. And even though she might feel angry or hurt, I believe she has it in her to forgive you", Max states.

"I hope you're right", Lando sighed as he tapped his phone, his finger hovering over your contact.

"I wouldn't do that", Max chirped, "you should rest before diving into anything about that topic, and today has had too many emotions as it is. Tomorrow is a new day for you to think about it", he advised.

With his head on the headrest, Lando went over everything that occupied his mind, allowing the heavy sinking feeling to settle in. To a degree, he deserved the discomfort he felt. Shame, guilt, frustration, remorse, embarrassment, overwhelm, sadness.

What if he had destroyed the thing that made him the happiest? If I managed to single out the person who loved him for him?

.

Lan 🧡

Hello. You were probably expecting a text or a call, but the last few days haven't been easy and I needed to ground myself a little. We really need to talk, Y/N. Do you think we can grab lunch today?

It irritated you how quick your heart was beating the minute you saw who sent you the text after you submitted all the projects that you had left. Battling an inner fight of whether or not you should answer it, you decided to so it. Rip the band-aid off, Y/N.

To Lan 🧡

Hello... We do urgently need to talk. I'm on my own today - where do you want to go?

Your tone was cold and unusual when you compared it to the older messages, filled with hearts and the pet names you had for eachother.

We can go to that café by the marina, the one with the paninis you really like.

Yes, we'll meet here at one pm.

Do you want me to pick you up?

No, I'll walk.

Your sunglasses are good enough to hide the nervous gloom on them as you walked to the marina. There is no script or guideline to go about this lunch other than honesty and finally admitting everything you were feeling. It could go either way and, truth be told, you believed it would go down the way it was supposed to.

Stepping on the wooden path to the small café's outside area, you looked for the boy whose arms were where you used to feel safe.

Lando chose a table that overlooked the water, the warm sun shinning and bringing out the blue of it. It would be a big conversation, and while the café wasn't crowded, he never knew how things could pan out so he went for the most demure spot.

When you take a proper look at him, it surprises you. His eyes are not shiny like they usually are - there's a dark hue surrounding them along with sadness.

"Hey", you utter out to grab his attention.

The moment he faces you, you feel naked despite the summery dress you have on. All vulnerabilities exposed for the person who knows you best and who can read you like the back of his hand.

"Hello, hi", Lando cleared his throat, "how have you been?".

Setting your bag on the chair, you shrugged, not ready to engage in casual chit chat.

"Do you already know what you are having?", he wondered.

"The italian panini and iced tea", you mumbled after looking at the menu he handed you, "have you ordered yet?", you mused before calling the waiter to do so.

The silence between you after the waiter left the table was painful and hard to digest. You avoided looking at his colourful eyes - once you did it, breaking down would be in an instant.

"We really need to talk, Y/N", Lando says.

"Do you want to go first? Or shall I?", you asked bitterly, accepting his silence.

The waiter comes back with your orders. The café doesn't have a big menu and it's mostly empty, so the service was quick, "I hope you enjoy it - Bon appétit!", he interrupted the tension filled moment.

"I recognise I need to apologize to you for all the things I did without realizing it an-", Lando was cut off by you.

"Let me stop you there before this derails", you stated, "I'm here to have a serious, grown up conversation, so I'm not going to sit here and listen to dusty and beaten up childish excuses".

If the ground could sink him into it, Lando would've accepted it gladly.

"It's a start that you have realised that something was wrong, but you can't excuse yourself like that, Lando. Not when this situation has taken proportions that you can't fanthom - you can't get away with being sorry for not noticing what you were causing", you argued.

Lando gave you a nod, "I'm still not sure about all the things that led us to this point and what it entails, and that's why I wanted you here. I don't want to be blind to it anymore - I want to get all of it so all the pieces make sense in my head. You probably won't believe it, Y/N, but I'm so lost in this. I feel like I've lived a parallel universe for the past couple of months", Lando added all in one go.

"When did your feet come back to the ground?", you mused, "when did you feel like maybe things weren't the way they should be?". The curiosity was killing you, and the answer could very well do the last stab.

"When I lost all of those places in the race", Lando gulped, "I expected you to call and to hear your comforting words, and they never came. Max was the one to bring my mind to the matter", he admitted and you could see he was the opposite of proud of his own actions, "How I've been the worst boyfriend in the world and how I deserved that you didn't call - hell, I'm not even sure if I deserve that you're here today and willing to listen to what I have to say".

It's difficult to maintain a tough appearance and pretend that his words don't affect you, but alas, you keep your armour on.

"That afternoon was a struggle for me, Lando. I wanted nothing more than to call you and hear your voice, silence your cornerns and negative thoughts, let you know that you're the best driver out there and that a bad race doesn't define you. That it wasn't your fault and that you shouldn't beat yourself up because of it, that I was still so proud of you and how you handled things and that nothing could keep me from shouting to the rooftops. But you didn't deserve it, my dignity has been punched by your actions day in day out for the past couple of months and I couldn't take it anymore".

"I need you to hear things from your side, I need to know your perspective so I can understand what I did wrong and if I'm able to fix it still", Lando asks desperately.

"We should start from the beggining then", you laced your hands on top of the table after taking a bite of your panini, "I think it was at the end of the last season - at the time it didn't seem like it, but looking at it now, it was the start. I even took some time off and travelled with you so we could enjoy your break, then I came back for university. It's never easy, I know, but up until then we never had any issues with it - even if it was a bloody run, we made time for eachother. Then, you barely texted, let alone call - but all relationships hit rough patches and I thought that it was ours. Then Christmas came around and we finally felt like us again, there were no work or uni commitments, and it was bliss. After that, life happened again and I couldn't find a way to spend time with you - there was always a Quadrant video to film or a meeting or some event. You, Max and Martin went to Bali, and despite the fact that I didn't have any exams and could easily do university stuff remotely - like I do everytime - you didn't even think to ask me if I wanted to go or if I had planned something for us in the first place. I just took it for granted that you would spend it with me, but when P showed me the photos I looked like a fool and an ungrateful friend and girlfriend because I stayed back, Lando. I never felt so humiliated. Max had his girlfriend and you didn't, you ignored me as if I didn't matter to you", you breathed out. Ruminating was one thing, talking about it out loud was another. The latter angered you less and hurt more.

"I'm sorry", Lando murmured and you were quick to shoot it down.

"I don't need you to apologize now, Lando. What I needed was for you to make a decision then, one that considered me and what I wanted", you sighed, wiping a stubborn tear that got out, "after that, I just watched you pull further and further away, and I tried to get closer, work things out, but you wouldn't let me in. You floated and floated and I stayed here, both feet glued to the ground as I watched you go higher and higher. You were never like this, letting things get to your head wasn't something you ever did, but it happened. You alienated me in such a way that for this triple header, I didn't hear your voice once unless it was from the TV or the McLaren social media. You only wanted to call when you needed comfort, and it hurts that it took Max to help you see things the way they are", you state as tears fell uncontrollably down your cheeks.

Apart from your earlier bite, both wooden serving boards look full and no one made a move to go further.

"You told me time and time again that you would always be there for me, but when I was the one needing a cuddle and reassuring words, I was all alone in my bedroom, crying because of you. When you said you'd be there for me, I guess you failed to account for the fact that you can't protect me from yourself.. Because what hurt me these past couple of months was you", you declared, sniffling and, finally, looking into Lando's swollen and tear-filled eyes.

The tears Lando has been holding back fell. He was angry with himself, at how he had done the one thing he promise not to do to you. He made you hurt, he was the reason you were in pain and he couldn't keep you from feeling it.

"I wish I could tell you there was a reason behind it and that it all has some justification, but there isn't and I can't lie to you. I was propelled from the results and the promise that this could be our year - my year - and everything else faded away. I know it's not any help, but I'm not proud of what I did, and definitely not proud of the way I made you hurt - I wish I could turn back time and do it differently", Lando confessed.

"I needed you, Lando", she bit back.

Lando couldn't find any words after that and once you began eating the now cold panini, he followed your movements, granting you the quietest meal you ever shared with him. Lando was playful, loud, cheery and giggly on any other day. As much as it nagged you that your words were the ones to dim that light, you had to put yourself first. Someone had to.

"Can we walk along the marina?", Lando asked once you finished eating, earning your nod to his surprise.

You both get up, Lando paying for your meal at the front before you left the establishment. You walked along, looking at the luxurious boats and yachts before you found a part of the wall that you was comfortable enough to sit on, remaining in silence as you watched a couple of people unlock their yachts and sailing away.

Lando wanted to say something, to prove to you that he was sorry and that he still loves you more than anything, but the fear of saying the wrong thing and hurting you even deeper was not something he wanted to risk.

"You're going to break up with me, aren't you?", Lando voiced the biggest worry on his mind since he left his apartment.

"I walked here, so I had time to think about all of this, and all I could think was that I was going to meet you there, be reminded of all the pain you made me feel, and then we wouldn't see a solution to this. And on my way here, it got harder because I passed by the shop where we always go for croissants, and then that park where I tripped and you carried me home because of my bruised knee even though I could walk just fine, the bench where that lady asked if Mila was our daughter when your brother visited. And when I arrived at the café and saw you, I knew there was no way I could do it", you half smiled.

"I struggled to see what was happening, and I didn't see what was clearly in front of me, and I know I can't undo all of the crap that I've made", Lando pointed out, "but I can say that I love you, Y/N. I love you even more than when I asked you to be my girlfriend, which I never thought was possible, but everyday I love you a little bit more. I know I won't be able to love anyone the way I love you and, honestly, I'm not sure who I am without you, because I've turned into a person I don't recognise anymore and I'm afraid that if I don't have you around, this is the real me, and I don't like it. You make me a better person - since day one! I'll love you forever, but I also understand that you don't need this pressure in your life and that you want us to be over. I deserve that", Lando mumbled.

As much as the idea of not being with you hurt him, he knew it didn't equate to the pain he caused you hence why he deserved it if you dumped him.

"You're making it so hard", your groaned rubbing your temples, "It would have been so much easier if you had told me that you didn't care about this, that you didn't care about me anymore".

"That's never going to happen, Y/N", Lando assured you.

"It would be so much easier if I told you to fuck yourself off, wouldn't it?", you chuckled and Lando got to see a small glimpse of the world's best smile, "but I can't do it - I do think, though, that we need to take some time, for both of us to work on our own things", you suggested.

"I get it, you can have all the time and space you need, Y/N", Lando nodded, "would it be too much to ask if I asked you for another shot?", he wondered as you quirked an eyebrow, "I know you just asked me for some time, and I'll give it to you, but I'm not going to let you entertain the thought that I don't care about you or that I don't love you any longer. I'm still the same person you met all those years ago and I want to remind you why you fell in love with me in the first place - if that's even the case", he blurted, "please".

"Slow steps, okay?", you mused with a small small.

"Is it still the case?", Lando picked up where he left off, "are you still in love with me?".

"If I wasn't in love with you and if I didn't love you, trust me, I wouldn't be here", you smiled, squeezing his hand in yours on top of the warm stone.

.

Over the last couple of days, you felt lighter. University was finally over for the semester and you could rest, and the whole situation with Lando was better. Even though it hurt to tell him all of those things and see his reaction, and even if Lando still had a lot to make up for, you had to admit you didn't expect to feel like this right away. The right path was being trailed and you couldn't feel more at peace with it.

So far, he kept his respectful distance, which didn't mean that you didn't know he was there. Two days after you met him in the marina, Lando sent you a bunch of flowers to your doorstep, your mother being the one to bring them up to your bedroom since she was arriving from work as the delivery man was about to knock on the door, smirking when she saw who it was from.

You were getting ready to go out for a picnic with Lando. The sunny day invited you to go out and Lando seemed to think the same, sending you a quick text with the location and plan ideas.

"Where are you off to?", your mother asked as she noticed you looking for your hat, "you look very nice, dear".

"Lando invited me for a picnic", you offered her a smile despite the butterfly feeling on your tummy.

"I'm glad you're working things out, Y/N - I know how much you care about him. And even if he hurt you, he's doing the work to get you back - a lot of men would just give up, but not Lando", your mother nudged. She always liked him despite her initial concerns when he moved up the racing ladder and the toll it would take on you. For a brief moment, she was upset that she had been right, but she never lost the hope that the young man dating her daughter would fight for them and for her. For you.

"I'm not sure how long I'll be out, but if I'm not home for dinner, don't worry too much", you added, waving at her before closing the door.

You drove yourself to the park, politely declining Lando's offer to pick you up. As you followed the directions, you spotted Lando under one of the trees, seemingly battling with the corner of the picnic blanket.

"Hey, need help with that?", you called as you approached him, noticing his flustered face at getting caught.

"Hey! It's fine, it's fine", he dusted off his shorts, "I didn't fold the corner properly, never mind iron this", he grumbled.

"We're going to sit on it, I don't think we needed it ironed", you smiled, setting your small backpack on the blanket and occupying the space that wasn't covered with glass containers and pape bags, noticing the logo of your favourite bakery and the sweets shop near Lando's apartment.

"So, I baked these - who knew my oven works, hm?", he joked as he pulled out some granola bars that smelled delicious, "Jon did give me the recipe, but I made them! He says they don't have any harmful raw ingredients in them so there's no danger if they're not cooked properly".

"You could've told me to bring something too", you sighed, "you had all this trouble and I'm just going to sit here and eat it", you reasoned.

"I think we've gathered that I deserve all this trouble, even though I didn't mind doing it - I think I finally get it when people say they find baking relaxing, even if I just threw some oats and syrup on a bowl with nuts and chocolate", Lando shrugged.

You smiled at his antics, "this looks lovely, Lan - thank you", before you grabbed a paper napkin to grab the food.

Lando's heart did a little backflip at the pet name - when he thought about it, he can't remember the last time you called him anything other than his name.

He wiped the thought away as he noticed you get one of the paper bags, "It was no trouble, but I did have to make sure the lady at the pastry shop knew I was the next in line because there was this lady, you should've seen her, she was, like, eighty? I don't know, maybe more than that, and she was very posh and very proper and she was trying to cut in line! Then she started saying something in French and I was like 'no can do, madam! I need to get these croissants for my girlfri- for Y/N because they're her favourites' - I bet she wanted to get them first but I did!", he dramatised the scene, earning your loud laugh. How much he missed that sound.

"Seems like it was a little troublesome, though", you teased. Inside your chest, your heart beat fast at his efforts.

"You're worth it", he smiled before taking a bite of the granola bar, "not to toot my own horn, but for someone who eats pre-prepared meals, this is amazing! Try these!", he offered, forming a shell with his hand before he brought it up to your mouth.

For anyone else, this would be just another set of cute behaviours, but for you, it carried a sense of intimacy you hadn't felt in a while. Taking a bite of it and chewing, you had to admit the balance of the nutty taste and the chocolate was on point, "it is good, Lan! You should make granola bars more often - might even make a side business out of it!", you smiled.

"Charles has some ice-cream, there's alcohol from the other guys too - me? Granola bars", he smiled, eating the rest of it and looking at you. He would never be stupid again. He would never take you for granted. Never ever.

The conversation flowed once you started eating, mainly pointing out the new swings in the park or the pretty blooms that were showing up, and even though you weren't acting like you would had it not happened, it was comfortable and Lando had definitely put some effort into this.

"Thank you for this, Lando", you smiled after you helped him clean up the supplies, making sure he wouldn't have any spills and trouble taking the rest home.

"It's alright, really", Lando mumbled as blood rushed to his cheeks, "it wasn't much, but I wanted to make sure you remembered I'm still in and that I love you more than anything", he smiled, closing the basket and getting up with it to walk back to the car, "which actually brings me to an invite I want to make you", he went back to mumbling again.

The invite was a risk, he knew it. After all, it was the reason that got your relationship here in the first place. Yet, he wanted you there and he thought it would be good. Adding to it, it would be the way that he could make sure he was able to see you as it would be a busy day.

"What is it?", you asked as you walked with him.

"The day after tomorrow, we're going karting - Max and P are coming over for a few days, they arrive tomorrow - and I was wondering if you wanted to join us", he invited, "I know it's not the best environment to be in given al-", he started rambling.

"I'd love to go, Lando", you assured, touching his arm confortingly, "I might need a ride though, if you don't mind doing the detour", you pointed out.

"It's fine, of course we'll pick you up!", he smiled, happy and excited at your answer.

"That's me", you nodded to your mother's car, unlocking it with the key, "thank you so much for this, Lan, I appreciate it a lot", you smiled, raising your stance so you could kiss his cheek, "will you text me the details when you know, please?".

"Yes! Absolutely!", he gave you a big smile again, "until then, Y/N!", he waved.

As Lando walked back to his car, there was an extra spring up on his step, a new found energy and a smile that insisted on not disappearing from his lips.

Little by little, he was slowly getting you back.

.

"Why are we going this way?", Max asked as Lando took the first exit on the roundabout, "isn't the track that way?".

Lando couldn't contain his smile, "we're going to pick Y/N up first".

Max and Pietra exchanged a look before rhe blonde woman spoke up, "you finally came to your senses?".

"P!", Max scolded.

"It's alright, Max - she's not wrong", Lando added, "but yes, I have, and I'm working on it, respecting her but making sure she knows how much I regret it, how sorry and how bad I feel that it happened and how I'm trying my hardest to make sure it does happen again", Lando turned around once he stopped at the red light, "Thank you for looking after her when I didn't, P. I know you have been a good friend to her, so thank you for that", he added.

"She didn't deserve what you did to her, but I'm happy you figured it out and that you're working on it - I don't say it too often, but if you two ever broke up, I would consider that true love isn't a thing, what you two have is something else entirely", she smiled.

"Excuse me?!", Max dramatised, "what did you just say?".

"Did I lie, Max? Who was it that came home in a nervous fit without any fingernails because they bit all of them off after Lando realised what happened? The same person who couldn't even sleep because of it? Who was it, hm?", she quesioned her boyfriend.

Lando chuckled at his friends, thinking that they really had been made for one another, "you two make me look like the sanest person inside this car", he shook his head, pressing the pedal and turning into your street.

There you were, the person he was sure was made for him too. Your outfit was simple, consisting of black jeans, black trainers, a shirt sleeve polo and a cardigan on your arm.

"Hi guys!", you greeted, getting inside the car and kissing Pietra's cheek before putting your seatbelt on.

"Why don't I get a kiss?", Max pouted.

"Because you stink, that's why", Lando chirped in, "all ready to go back there?", he mused, sending you a wink from the rear view mirror.

Blushing, you nodded before looking at Pietra again, accepting her hand in yours as she gave it a squeeze. For the whole drive to the track, you engaged light conversation, mainly listening to the plans they had for the clips they were filming before they raced eachother since you and P would happily drive around in the karts just to pass the time.

For the first segment, you stayed on the stands, watching the team get the equipment ready.

"How have you been, Y/N?", Pietra asked as she handed you a bottle of water she had gone to her and taking a sip of her own.

"I've been well - university is finally done with and I can actually have a thought that doesn't involve it", you giggled, "and Lando is home", you offered.

"Now, I wasn't going to be so blunt, but that is the subject I wanted to get at", she raised her eyebrows playfully.

"He's... Goodness, he's Lando again, my Lando", you sighed happily, "surely, it still stings a little and we need to work through our issues, but we're trailing our way through them. Learning our ways together - it's a bit like falling in love again and it's such a good feeling", you blushed at your admission, "it's doing us well and we're going with it, and not out of it", you smiled.

"Y/N", Pietra cooed, "you have no idea how make that makes me! It's so good to see you so happy and hopeful", she squeezed your arm, "I was ready to avenge you on him, by the way, Max did us both a favour in telling him, because I was sure what I wanted to do to Lando was considered a crime and I'm a good person", she raised her hands defensively.

Once the boys were done, Max waved at you to come down and meet them, giving them the time to get your equipment ready.

"Come here, I need to make sure you don't fly out of your kart this time", Max called his girlfriend after she was fully equipped to go on the single seater.

You finished the makeshift hairstyle before you looked for the helmet, finding it in Lando's hands, "come here, big head, I'll help you put it on", he smiled.

As you approached him, you could see his sudden nervousness at having you so close to him, hands setting the helmet on top of your head and then pulling in on, "Look who's talking", you mumbled quickly before it was all the way in, his fingers gingerly touching your neck as he did the strap buckle.

"All good for our speed daredevils?", Max joked, getting an instant slap from Pietra before he got up.

"Does it feel safe, Y/N?", Lando checked with you, making you wiggle a little to make sure you were strapped tightly enough, making you flash his two thumbs up.

"Ready, set, go!", Max yelled before you and Pietra went off, happily driving on the track despite not extracting the full potential out of the kart.

"You and Y/N seem well", Max offered as him and Lando took a break before they joined you back at the track.

"I don't think I'll ever stop feeling this guilt on my chest, it's like a weird weight that sits here and gets heavy every now and again", Lando explained, "but I think we're going in the right direction, and I'm going to spend every day of our lives making sure it never happens again. Y/N will never doubt my love or affection for her. I just want to make her happy now that she knows I know how much I screwed us up".

"I'm proud of you, man", Max tapped his back.

"You're what?", Lando asked, a little flustered at his bestfriends words.

"I'm proud of you, Lando - you're dealing with this in such a good way! I'm not saying I doubted you would, but seeing you actually do it and make it happen in such a grown up, loving and accountability filled way makes me proud of who you became. As much as I joke about it, what P said in the car was true - you and Y/N are it. Whenever I think about what endgame is, you two are the first thing that comes to mind", he admitted.

"Thanks, mate", Lando replied earnestly.

After a couple of laps from you, you saw the boys joining you in the track, making you assure that whenever they lapped you, you made a Mario Kart like noise, always managing to get a smile and a headshake from Lando and Max.

Once you were done, Max and Pietra volunteered to take all of the supplies back to the storage room.

"Did you enjoy your day, Y/N?", Lando asked as he approached you.

Surprising him, you nodded before you hugged him, "I haven't been this happy in a long time", you cuddled him, letting your head rest on his chest and letting yourself feel enveloped by his arms after the initial shock wore off.

"I'm glad", Lando uttered out before he composed himself, "I just want you to know that I could fulfill all your dreams and that there I'll never do anything to hurt you again. I'm well aware of all shit I've done and put you through, and how accountable I am for it. I just want to make you happy", he chuckled, "I don't want anything else in this world other than to make you happy, to show you how much I love you and that I want make this work, I want to make us work", he let out in such a serious and intense tone that you could feel a knot forming your throat, "you were my first love and I want you to be my last, Y/N".

"Lan...", you gasped softly, "I know it hasn't been good for you, but I just need a little bit more time to put it behind me, once for all", you added.

"I know, and that's alright", he mumbled against the top of your head, "I just wanted you to know that it is coming straight from my heart - everything I do, I do it for you", plucking up the courage to press a kiss there.

You closed your eyes and basked in the feeling, "two Bryan Adams references in the same sentence from the guy who used to DJ? You impress me, Lando Norris", you giggled and teased him playfully, feeling the rubble from his own laugh on his chest.

"I'll make sure to impress you everyday that we're alive, Y/N Y/L/N", he promised.

And he intended to keep it.

.

Lando invited you to his apartment for a cosy night in, thinking the plans over and over while he waited for you to arrive.

The delivery service was faster than he expected so he wrapped the takeout boxes in all of the kitchen towells he had so they would help retain the heat while you weren't there yet.

The whole apartment was tidy, he had your favourite blanket on the sofa and the TV had your favourite shows ready to stream in the background as you hopefully shared a comforting meal.

Your acceptance to come to his place made Lando feel very pleased with the way you were trailing in your relationship. He had been able to correct his mistakes and make you happy again. Even though there had been moments where he seemed to forget, he now knew that you had always been and will always be a priority in his life. He had never been in love with anyone else, and he was sure he would always be in love with you until his last breath.

A knock on his door pulled him out of his thoughts, heading up to the door to open it, "Hello hello! Come in", he gestured as you stepped inside, pecking his lips on the way - a few days prior, you had kissed him out of nowhere when you went to the bookshop and you swore he looked like a cartoon, all wide eyes and blushy cheeks.

Lando assured you you wouldn't leave the house and it would be just the two of you, so you hadn't bothered to put together a proper outfit, opting to wear a pair of leggings and an old Quadrant hoodie.

"I wasn't sure if I should bring anything, so I stopped by the sweets shop to get some of these hard candies, apparently they're very trendy now", you giggled sweetly as you set the bag on his hands so you could take your trainers off.

"You didn't have to, but thanks! We'll do a taste test after dinner - which is here by the way", he guided you to the living room.

Unravelling the mountain of kitchen towells, he had you sit down before he opened the containers, handing you a plate after you chose a bit of each of the dishes he ordered, "thank you, Lan", you smiled, sitting criss-cross on the sofa and waiting for him to do the same before you started eating.

"These are really good, have you tried them? They're new on their menu and when the guy explained it to me, I thought you'd like it", he pointed to one of the bite sized pieces.

"They are! They're not too heavy on the seasoning and they're really nice when you dip them in this sauce - try it!", you offered him the small cup.

"Is this going to be like the time you made me dip my spring rolls in that other sauce you claimed was the best thing in the world?", he asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Just try it, Lan!", you insisted, getting one from your plate, dipping it in the sauce and taking it up to Lando's mouth, your hand under the chopsticks in case some of it fell on his clothes.

Lando chewed it before nodding and humming in satisfaction, "is it good", he admitted with a smile after he wiped his lips.

Once you finished eating, you helped Lando bring everything back to the kitchen, saving the leftovers on his fridge, washing the plates and putting them away.

"You didn't have to help, I could've done it myself", Lando nudged before he laced your hand in his and pulled you back to the living room, "do you want to watch something?", he asked.

"There's this new Disney movie I haven't watched if you're up for it - or any of the shows we usually watch, I'm not picky", you answered quickly.

"Disney it is", he smiled sitting down and resting his arm on the back of the sofa, hoping you'd sit next to him and cuddle him.

You shuffled around before grabbing the fluffy blanket, pulling it over your legs and tentatively closing the distance between you, taking the plunge and taking a spot on his chest.

Once the movie was playing, Lando's arm dropped to wrap around you, lulling you closer to him and rubbing your arm.

"I can hear you thinking, and I'm sure you're not thinking about that little goat", you nodded to the screen.

"I'm watching the movie, I swear - and he's quite funny actually! He's also Mila's favourite character, at least he was last week", Lando chuckled, "but I was also thinking about us", he admitted.

"You were?", you turned to look up at him, wanting to know more.

"You do know I will apologize for what I did until the end of our lives, don't you?", Lando reflected out loud.

"Lando, stop it, it's forgiven and forgotten", you offered.

"Is it really?", he asked, a small smile breaking his way into his lips.

"It is, it's behind us now", you kissed his clothed chest.

"I will never forget it, though. It doesn't matter how many times you tell me to forget it or that you've forgiven me", he let out a shaky sigh, "I don't think I will, I hate myself for what did to you, the hurt that I caused you".

"Lando, let's not talk about it right now - not now, not ever. It's a part of our story, yes, and we learned from it, but I don't want to to remember every day. We are good now, and I don't want you to torture yourself with something that is out of your reach and that you can't change", you told him sternly, now sitting back against the sofa so you can face your boyfriend, "Promise me we won't mention this again, Lando".

"You're right", Lando agrees, "Okay, you're right, I promise, Y/N", he stated with a smile.

Your delicate lips peck his quickly before you go in for a second kiss, longer and more intense this time, and you both got lost in eachother.

You couldn't change what happened, but you could learn from it and work everyday to make sure it never happened again.

Lando was crazy about you, about who he was when was with you and how you made him feel, and you felt the same way about him.

"I love you, Lando", you smiled after you pulled away, resting your forehead in his.

"I love you forever, Y/N", he whispered, sealing his promise with a peck and bracing himself, "I'm never taking you for granted, and maybe this is a big gesture and I'm not sure how much this fits our new way - new patch? It's not a patch if we want it to last forever, right? - anyway, I would like to ask you to move in with me", Lando stated, "it doesn't have to be tomorrow or right away, we'll do it when you're ready! I just- I spend so much time of the year away as it is, and I don't want to cut the short time even shorter when it comes to you, so this way we'll be together for a bit longer - even if it's just at nightime and we can intertwine our legs or I can warm up the bed for you", he rambled on and you were sure he wouldn't stop anytime soon.

"Hey, hey! Lando, baby", you cupped his face with your hands, "look at me", you smiled as you straddled his lap, your thighs on each side of his and keeping you from fully sitting on him, "good now?".

"Well, since you're already there - sit, please", Lando added before he allowed himself to stress about your answer.

"I don't want to squash you", you mumbled.

Laying his hands in your thighs, he pulled you down, "I said sit down", he spoke sternly despite the playful glint on his eyes, "it's my home after all, I get to make the rules".

"Oh, I thought it was our home, but maybe I misread th-", your playfulness was cut short as your boyfriend flipped you around, your back hitting the soft sofa cushion with a yelp.

"You're moving in? For real?", he asked.

"Yes, baby, I'm moving in", you cupped his cheek, pulling him for a kiss, "I love you".

"My love, I'm going to spend everyday reminding you how beautiful, how strong", he started kissing your face with every word, "how kind, how amazing, how sexy, how hot, how smart, how kind, how incredible you are", he stopped just above your lips, "how all mine you are - I love you Y/N, forever", before he kissed your lips.

[serverusslaype]

Shameless, pt. 10

Severus Snape x professor!reader fic

Shameless Masterpost

it's ya girl, back again...! 😼

hello, hi, how are you all? :) hope you are doing well! i'm feeling a lot better, i'm just congested now fml </3

this chapter is shorter, but not too short. as in it's not as long as the previous ones - they were like 6,000 words+, this is only 4,000-5,000 i think. The main reason is because it didn't really make sense to me to have it longer. so i hope you guys enjoy it!

thank you for all the likes, reblogs and most importantly the replies you left on the last chapter, they had me fucking dying oh my lord. 😭 you guys are so funny honestly. please keep leaving stuff like that it truly makes me laugh and makes my day 🌟🩷

Also guys what the fuck since when could you attach songs????? IM ABOUT TO GO BACK AND ADD SOME ON THE PREVIOUS CHAPTERS BECAUSE WHATTT MIND BLOWN

without further ado......

You trailed behind McGonagall and Snape, keeping your eyes glued to the floor in front of you as your body was still on fire from your encounter with Severus.

"How on Earth did Black manage to slip into the castle?" Snape hissed, briefly looking at McGonagall who was striding beside him, her brows laced together with worry. A shiver slid down your spine as Snape's stern voice bounced off of the stone corridor, creating a rather dramatic echo. Only moments ago were you about to kiss the man, totally disregarding the fact that you were seeing Ben. What a fucking mess.

Then again, you thought, how could anyone not get lost in his eyes? Gods, you were such a pathetic excuse for a woman as of right now.

Severus's eyes were distracting, almost magnetic-like, as they beckoned you to look further within them, silently persuading you to forget about anything and everything that mattered to you. You were sure he didn't intend to do such a thing, or maybe that's what you were telling yourself, but in that intimate moment with him, you couldn't help but feel inclined to kiss him. Whether it was the heat of the moment or not, you were sure he wanted to kiss you too.

"We're not sure," McGonagall replied, sighing in a distressed manner as she ripped you from your self-destructive thoughts. "Even Albus is baffled as to how he eluded our defences." You flicked your eyes up to glance at Minerva. You sort of felt like you shouldn't be here, it's not like you'd be much help if Black appeared in front of you right this second - your knowledge and skill in combat was nowhere near the level of McGonagall and Snape, you were certain that you'd probably be a burden. The thought of slipping away down a corridor poked at your brain, taunting you.

"Y/N?" Minerva's worrisome voice once again pulled you from your thoughts. You looked up, face flushing as you met Severus's curious eyes. Quickly glancing away, you focused your attention on the Gryffindor Head of House, afraid of the outcome if you stared any longer at him.

"Yes?" You cleared your throat, ignoring the way Severus was side-eyeing you from behind Minerva.

"Would you mind going to check the greenhouses?" She asked. Severus snapped his head at Minerva, clearly in disagreement with her proposal. You frowned slightly at his quick reaction, a tad offended.

"Minerva, I don't think that's a wise idea." Severus said rather sternly, glancing at you for a brief moment. Your face felt hot again.

"Y/N is more than capable of handling herself, Severus." Minerva replied, matching his stern tone. Severus's jaw ticked as he huffed quietly, looking away from the the older witch, silently feuding with her decision. She turned to you and offered a reassuring smile. You appreciated the faith that she had in you, but you weren't sure it was... correctly placed, to put it lightly. You pursed your lips, slightly awkward, stuck between staring at Severus's doubtful eyes and Minerva's confident ones. As you met Snape's eyes, he looked away, his brows furrowing. Your stomach somersaulted, but you weren't sure it was in the positive way you wanted. "Severus, check the dungeons." Minerva ordered, and he obliged with a curt nod, leaving almost immediately without a blink at you.

You shut your eyes briefly, fighting the urge to scream. Fuck, did you just make it extremely awkward between you two? Or was that just him being his naturally dismissive self? Was he just saving face because the two of you were in the presence of McGonagall? Did he actually lean in to kiss you as well or... did you imagine that?

"Y/N?" Minerva called, once again pulling you from your thoughts.

"Hm?" You blinked, eyes widening quickly as you realised you had a job to do. "Sorry, I was just-"

The older witch gently touched your forearm, causing you to look up at her with twinkling eyes. "What's going on with you and Severus?" Minerva questioned you, keeping her voice low but curious. As you looked at her, hesitantly, you saw sadness in her eyes, or perhaps... pity? "I know what I saw." She added rather glumly. You were a little confused at her tone, why did she seem so... sad about this?

"I don't know what you're talking about." You choked out awkwardly. Her brows knitted together as she leant her head back slightly, almost like she was disappointed in you.

"Don't make me sound like a fool, Y/N." She said. That was the same tone she had taken with you when you were a student. You immediately tore your eyes away.

"I..." Your mouth stayed open for a moment, unsure of what to say. "It's... complicated."

"It always is with Severus." Minerva sighed through her nose, a little agitated. You looked back and tilted your head at her, confused.

"What do you mean by that?"

"Severus is a complicated man, Y/N. I'm not sure you're aware of just how far his... trauma... goes." She said quietly, her tone switching back to it's usual soft one. You broke your gaze from Minerva's and shifted it to the ground thoughtfully.

"Nothing will come of it," You shook your head as the image of Ben flooded your mind. You winced. "It was a mistake, I shouldn't have done that, it was just a spur of the... moment... sort of thing." You shrugged, trying to ignore the pain that was currently blossoming in your chest at the sound of your own words. "I'm, err, seeing someone, anyway."

"Oh?" Minerva quirked a brow at you. This must sound so disorderly to her. You're seeing someone, but she had walked in on you almost kissing Severus? She probably thinks you're some kind of harlot that can't keep her legs closed now. Jesus. Nice one.

"Um, Benjamin- Benjamin Bluewater, I'm sure you're familiar with that name..." You trailed off, shrinking as you awaited her answer. You knew he wasn't a fond topic amongst the teachers at Hogwarts back in the day, so you were always preparing yourself for a scolding or some sort of judgemental remark.

"Oh, yes, I remember Mr Bluewater." Minerva hummed thoughtfully, staring at you with her inquisitive eyes. You felt as if you had to explain yourself.

"In regards to the... thing you saw- Severus and I, it's complicated, like I said, there's this weird... tension between us-" You were rambling now, and you couldn't stop yourself. Merlin, someone stop you, please. "I can't really explain it, I mean I have feelings for him, but he didn't feel the same, then I-I met Ben, and then today happened, and... it's just a whole... mess, Minerva, I don't know what to do." You huffed, clearly distressed with the situation. You looked down at the floor, your cheeks flushing with embarrassment, too worked up to even look your colleague and former-professor in the eye. "I'm sorry, I know there's another situtation at hand and I shouldn't be bothering you with such... trivial things but..." As you looked up, a soft smile had made it's way onto her face. You were rather shocked to see that. You'd expected another disappointed frown.

"Y/N," Minerva said soothingly, placing a calming hand upon your frantic ones, "as much as I respect and admire Severus, I think you should focus on Benjamin." She sighed softly. "Save your heart. Severus will only break it." A sad smile crossed her features, almost like she knew how you felt. Your mouth was parted - mainly from shock. Perhaps you should listen to Minerva, she'd known Severus for much, much longer than you have. You didn't know what to say, so you only nodded, closing your mouth slowly. "Now, I have to find Albus. Will you make sure the greenhouses are safe?"

"Of course." You swallowed, a feeling of uncertainty settling upon you.

"Lumos." You muttered, aiming your wand in the darkened room, the reflections of your wand glittering against the mossy windows. Your eyes darted around the greenhouse, searching for any sign of Black having been inside or nearby.

Everything seemed to be as you'd left it. All of your assignments were in the correct place, no plants nor pots had been knocked over and broken... no signs of forced entry... A sigh of relief slipped out of you, your tense body relaxing. Though, before you got too comfortable, the sound of a twig snapping behind you reversed all indications of your relief.

"Jesus!" You cried out, whirling around like a bullet, your frightened eyes softening a tad as they fell upon a tall, cloaked figure - none other than Severus Snape. "Please, can you not do that?!" You sighed, a hand flying to your chest in a feeble attempt to settle your racing heart as your cheeks painted themselves pink.

An amused smirk tugged at Snape's lips as his hands were clasped behind his back, staring down at you. "And not witness the terrified look upon your face?" Severus quipped, clearly relishing in your entertaining reaction. "I must disagree."

"At least let me know you're there, I could have hurt you." You replied with a glare, looking up to see an incredulous brow cocked up on Severus's face. You rolled your eyes at him. "Okay, I wouldn't have hurt you, but still, just... tell me next time." You huffed, rather exhaustedly. "Why are you here anyway? Aren't you meant to be checking the dungeons?" 

"I did." Severus nodded, allowing his eyes to study your still-petrified, yet red face. You swallowed, feeling rather vulnerable under his gaze. He seemed to hesitate for a moment, debating whether to speak again. "I just wanted to make sure you were... alright."

"Oh," You choked, feeling like someone had just winded you. Did he really just say that? "I'm okay." You said, placing your wand back inside the pocket of your forest-green robes.

"I can see that." Severus muttered, blinking slowly at you. McGonagall's words uttered in your mind as you felt yourself becoming lost in his dark, black eyes once more.

'Save your heart. Severus will only break it.'

"We should head back." You cleared your throat as your soft voice pierced the blanket of silence that had fallen upon the two of you. "The greenhouses are clear. I doubt Black would choose to hide out here, it's not exactly... erm, tidy." An embarrassed grimace twisted your features as you glanced around the room.

"I don't suppose it helps when one is bombarded with... gifts." Severus said, spitting the last word out like it was poison. You glanced up at him, frowning.

"And what's wrong with that?" You folded your arms against your chest rather defensively.

"In my humble opinion," Severus gave a curt sigh through his nostrils, evidently disapproving of Ben's tendency to send you a copius amount of flowers amongst other things. "Few small, meaningful gifts are far more superior than a prolific amount of materialistic gifts." He finished, sneering slightly at the wilting flowers that were dotted around your greenhouse, all adorned with different handwritten notes. Inside, you agreed with Snape, and you wished that that was the case with Ben, but he just seemed to think that throwing gold and flowers at you would keep you interested. Of course, you didn't mind him sending you such things, you were grateful, but it was getting a little tiresome. 

"Just because you don't get any." You teased, trying to hide the cheeky smile that tugged at your lips. Severus's head snapped to yours, an icy glare piercing your soul. You shivered slightly, a little sheepish as his sharp eyes dug into yours.

"I don't need gifts to satisfy my ego." He quipped, turning his nose up at you. Clearly, he didn't appreciate your light-hearted joke.

"Right, because talking down on people does that for you." You retorted, narrowing your eyes at Severus. Your patience was thin today, obviously.

"You seem to have grown a backbone, Y/N." Severus stepped towards you.

"I need one with you." You huffed, turning away from him. Severus watched curiously as you stepped away from him, his eyes trailing down your back, silently admiring your robes. He couldn't help but notice how pretty you looked in green. He thought it suited you better than your usual yellow and black. Perhaps he was just being selfish, imagining you in his House colour.

"Are you quite done?" Severus voiced. You cast a confused glance at him.

"With?" You frowned, cocking a brow expectantly.

"Having a tantrum." He replied, infamously cocking his brow at you.

"You're joking, right?" You scoffed at him, taking the bait like a fool. You turned yourself around to face him. "I made a lighthearted joke and you took it personally." The corners of his lips tugged upwards slightly in amusement. At this point it was too easy for him to wind you up. "What are you smiling about?" You stepped towards him, challenging him. He was getting underneath your skin.

"It's a pity that big mouth of yours doesn't match up with your brain." Severus said languidly, his deep voice sending a shockwave through your body. You had to swallow to compose yourself as your stomach began to tingle. He stood motionless in front of you, his hands still clasped behind his back, though you were blind to the fact that he was currently squeezing them harder the closer you got.

"Big mouth?" A gasp fell from your lips as you stared up at Severus, your eyes narrowing into a glare. "That's rich coming from you." You retorted, feeling your cheeks grow hot as you held his gaze. His lips twisted into a smirk as he closed the space between you with another step, that familiar smell of him overwhelming you.

"Is it?" Severus challenged you, silently enjoying your vain show of determination. He set his shoulders back as he stared down at you with scrutinising eyes, studying every inch of your pinkening face. He was getting a reaction out of you, and he was loving it.

"Yes." You panted. At this point, you were so worked up and distracted by his words and luscious scent that you hadn't noticed how unravelled you'd become. Your chest was heaving, breaths quiet and deep, your cheeks flushed unashamedly. You were a breathless mess. Your body was begging for Severus at this point. You were desperate for him to touch it, to even just lay a finger on it- anything. You had to relieve this ache.

"Please, enlighten me, Y/N." Severus whispered, leaning in towards you. A growl bubbled in your throat as you glared at him, your irked eyes boring into his. You were so tense and wound up that you couldn't talk. Your words were so jumbled together that you just couldn't form a coherent sentence without embarrassing yourself. "Hmm," Severus hummed, tilting his head at you, as if he was analysing you like an equation. "Didn't think so." He added smugly, the corner of his mouth quirking upwards.

"You're such an arsehole." You exhaled, shoving him with a flat palm. He didn't budge. Instead, his hand flew to your wrist, gripping it like an iron vice. Your eyes widened as Severus's once-smirking lips fell into a serious, flat line, his eyes burning.

"Weren't you taught that you mustn't... touch... what... isn't... yours?" Severus tutted, articulating each syllable with a hint of venom. You wished that wasn't the case, but in this world, you rarely get what you want. 

You clenched your jaw at Severus, tugging at your wrist in a vain attempt to free it. His grasp tightened, and you balled your fist. "Let go." You whispered as he tugged you towards him, just mere milimeters separating your bodies. Severus's eyes burned into yours, your body betraying you as it erupted into goosebumps; his face dangerously close to yours once more.

"Where are your manners?" Severus whispered back harshly, his hot breath dancing across your face once more, teasing you. You let your eyes flick between his, hesitating as they dropped down his face, eyeing his lips.

"Perhaps you need to teach me some." You taunted, breathless, your mind jaded. Not one appropriate thought was racing through your mind right now. Severus's brow quirked at your reply, quite obviously taken aback.

"An insufferable brat like you is unteachable." Severus spat back, baring his teeth. The insult didn't do it's job of hurting you, rather, it... aroused you. Your bodies were grazing against one another now, and the way his chest was scraping against yours was sending you into overdrive.

"You wanna bet?" You growled as he released your wrist after one more relentless tug from you. Severus kept his arm raised for a moment, his palm splayed as he glared down at you, your noses almost as close as they were just hours ago. Silence encased the two of you again, only your irregular, ragged breathing being the one thing that the two of you could hear. He was the first to break it.

Gods, you were so close. At this very moment, you had no care left inside of you. You were shameless for him. You couldn't hold yourself back anymore.

After several insufferable seconds, you threw your lips against his; the electric jolt that shot through you almost unbearable as a stifled moan slipped from your lips. A muffled grunt growled at the back of Severus's throat as his hands flew to your hips, kissing you back with such thirst and force you were worried he'd leave bruises around your mouth. His long, slender fingers dug into your clothed flesh like the desperation of a starved man as he pulled you taut against him, his left hand gliding down your arm to grasp messily at your hands, guiding them to sit around his neck. You allowed your fingers to comb through his thick, raven locks; nails grating at his scalp, prompting a delectable, throaty groan from him. Your legs tingled at the sultry noise. The rough, black buttons of his frock dug into your bared chest as he hauled you closer with greedy hands, the coarse texture scraping against your skin, bound to leave thin red scratches across your breast. A strangled cry fell from your lips as Severus teethed your bottom lip, playfully pulling at it. He released it and pressed another heated, sloppy kiss against your swollen mouth, your lids fluttering as you felt yourself melt into his addictive touch.

Severus pulled away from you, a begging whine falling from your lips. "So needy." He teased, breath hot and dangerous.

"Shut up." You muttered through gritted teeth, pulling him back onto you, your body igniting once more his lips met yours.

Pressing your aching body against his, Severus's cold hand slipped up to the back of your hot neck and brought your face impossibly closer to his; your spine aflame as delicious chills shot down it. With burning lungs, you parted your lips, darting your wet tongue into his mouth. Severus let out a heavenly whimper as your tongue licked against his, sending a rush of blazing heat through his shuddering body. Suddenly, he was pushing you backwards, lips still locked in a ferocious fight as the backs of your thighs hit the edge of your desk. Severus's hands swiftly slid from your waist and hooked themselves beneath your bum, inducing a breathy gasp to fall out of you as he lifted you up onto the wooden desk, the two of you disregarding everything that lay upon it. Including handwritten notes from Ben. You felt him smirk against your quivering mouth at the sensual noise that left you, clearly proud at what a panting, desperate mess he'd made you.

As he shuffled you onto the desk, your back knocked over a silver candle holder.

"Careful." You whispered against him, your eyes opening to shoot him a warning glare, though a hint of playfulness was hidden within your lustful voice.

"Shut up." Severus demanded, ultimately silencing you as he forced his mouth on yours, drowning you with his devilish tongue.

Your hands snaked down from the smooth skin of his neck, heading towards his chest, fingers clamping around the edges of his black cloak. Tugging him closer, you laid back on your desk with interlocked lips and Severus gladly obliged, leaning over you, planting a steadying hand beside your head. His other hand caressed your waist in a back-and-forth manner, feeling you, sending your body into a frenzy. Your wet, bruised lips fought against his, noses pressing into each other's cheeks. He pulled another moan from you as he gently brushed his hand against the side of your breast, teasing you.

Before Severus could trace his fingers down your middle, the crack of a branch in the distance ripped the two of you from your intense, sweaty encounter. Immediately, you and Severus pulled away from each other's faces with an audible, wet smooch, the both of you glancing to the source of the noise; breaths still heavy, hands still glued to one another's bodies intimately.

"What was that?" You whispered, fingers tightening around the silky material of his cloak. Instinctively, Severus's hand tensed around you protectively as he let his eyes search the dark; foggy mind racing.

"I don't know," He whispered back, turning back to look at you underneath him after he deemed it safe. You looked ethereal. Your hair was messily splayed-out behind your head, parts of it drooping over the opposite edge of the desk he was leant over. Your cheeks were red and flushed, lips swollen and pink, almost bruised from how harshly Severus had attacked them. After several seconds of admiring his work, he spoke. "Look at you," he hummed, a dangerous smirk painting his face, "what a beautiful mess." He let his eyes rake over your shuddering body, lingering on the red marks that scattered your bare chest. If possible, you blushed harder, your hands reluctantly flying up to fold against you, framing your breasts almost perfectly. Severus bit back a groan. "We should head back, I wouldn't want the others to think Black had had his way with you."

You rolled your eyes at him, a little irked. He'd learned perfectly well how to get under your skin. "What, you don't think I can hold my own against him?"

"Certainly not." Severus answered simply, stepping back from you and offering a hand to help you up. You wanted to protest against his answer, however, you knew he was right. There was no way you could fend off Sirius Black of all wizards. You'd just become another statistic to him. As you took Severus's hand and slipped off of the desk in one swoop, his eyes fell on the notes from Ben that you'd been laid upon. He let out a disapproving hum. You frowned and followed his eyes. Your stomach dropped and your body ran cold at the now slightly damaged notes.

"Shit." You exhaled as you stared down awkwardly at the ripped parchment.

"Shit, indeed." Severus repeated, side-eyeing you with a cocked brow. You glared at him. "Who would have thought, committing adultery with another professor at Hogwarts could be such an interesting feat?" He teased, stepping towards you, intentionally brushing his shoulder against yours.

You swallowed thickly, trying to ignore how close Severus was to you. "It's not like it was serious," You sighed curtly, running a stressed hand through your hair. "I mean, we've only been seeing each other for like, almost... four... months..." You trailed off, your shoulders feeling rather heavy as a strong wave of guilt flooded you. Were you really trying to justify your actions?

"Four months?" Severus sounded impressed.

"...Yes." You replied, avoiding his amused eyes. "You can wipe that smirk off your face right now." You scolded, casting a daring glance his way. For a moment, you admired how he looked - his hair was a little scruffy from where you'd had your hands buried in it, lips partially reddened from how you'd kissed him only moments ago. A hot blush took to your cheeks as you stared at him, your mind reeling back to how he'd grabbed you and pulled you so close against him, like he was scared you'd disappear into thin air.

"We can decide what to do later." Severus stated, slipped his wand from his sleeve and casting Lumos, illuminating the once-darkened greenhouse. "For now, let's return. I'm sure Minerva is wondering where we've disappeared to."

We? Did you hear him correctly?

Before you could question him, he already had his hand pressed against the small of your back, ushering you out of the greenhouse and back towards the castle entrance.

"I've searched the Astronomy Tower and the owlery, sir, but there's nothing there." Filch's decrepid-like voice came from in front of you as Severus escorted you into the Great Hall, his hand falling from your back as you neared Dumbledore and the other staff. You felt a little bummed at the loss of contact, but you didn't exactly want to out yourselves immediately. Speaking of that, you weren't even sure if anything was going to happen between you and Severus, maybe he'd change his mind again like he did last Christmas...

As you glanced around, you noticed every single student was asleep in the Hall, gentle snores slipping from their peaceful faces. You felt a little relieved that they were all safe and sound.

"Yes, the third floor is clear too, sir." Professor Flitwick said to Dumbledore, his beady eyes peering at the old man through his glasses. As the sound of yours and Severus's footsteps began to echo in the large hall, Flitwick turned, staring at the two of you. Clasping his hands together, he watched you and Severus stroll towards him.

"The greenhouses are empty as well, sir." You spoke, offering a polite smile to Flitwick. He happily returned it, averting his attention back to Dumbledore.

"Very good, thank you." Dumbledore acknowledged you with a small smile as you reached him. You stopped just beside Flitwick, your stomach flipping as Severus continued passed you. His addicting scent glided along with him, a pink tinge staining your cheeks as you inhaled. You turned away from Flitwick, afraid he'd notice your poorly-hidden reaction.

Severus was next to speak as he halted himself beside Dumbledore. "And I've done the dungeons, Headmaster, no sign of Black, nor anywhere else in the castle." He said, his deep baritone ruffling your feathers. You cleared your throat, quietly, glancing away from him. You could hardly control yourself right now. That moment in your greenhouse had really messed with your self-control. Severus glanced at you sideways, a tiny smirk picking at his lips. He must have noticed your crumbling composure.

Flitwick eyed the two of you, a perplexed expression crossing his features.

"I didn't really expect him to linger." Dumbledore replied, hooking Severus's attention from you. Flitwick used this moment to slip away to keep a watchful eye over the slumberous students.

"Remarkable feat, don't you think? To enter Hogwarts on one's own... completely undetected?" The Potions Master drawled as he and Dumbledore began to slowly walk forwards. You caught up to them and settled yourself beside Severus, sheepishly glancing up at him, your hands settling in front of your hips. He glimpsed at you, cocking a brow questioningly, a tingling sensation building in your stomach as you stared up at him.

"Quite remarkable, yes." The Headmaster agreed, his hands floating behind his back, subsiding as they intertwined themselves. The three of you continued walking between the rows upon rows of sleeping students, your shoulders brushing against Severus's now and again.

"Any ideas on how he might've managed it?" You asked quietly, your voice curious but concerned. Dumbledore glanced at you with his wise eyes, rather surprised at you. When the older wizard was around, you tended you keep quiet. However, with Severus beside you, a newfound confidence had arisen within you.

"Many. Each as unlikely as the next." He replied, turning back to focus on the path in front of him.

Severus spoke again, his voice rattling you. It felt as if someone had let off a grand show of fireworks in your chest. "You may recall, prior to the start of term I did express concerns about your appointment of Professor Lupin-"

Dumbledore quickly interrupted him, his voice strict and unforgiving. "Not a single professor inside this castle would help Sirius Black to enter it," he said, looking to Severus, "no, I'm quite convinced this castle is safe, and I'm more than willing to send the students back to their houses." You glanced away for a moment, zoning out as you glazed over the large stained window that had the crest of all four houses set within it. Your eyes lingered on Slytherin and Hufflepuff, flicking between them thoughtfully. Could a Slytherin and Hufflepuff truly work together?

As you'd stopped to admire the window, Dumbledore and Severus had continued on forwards. You stood still, your eyes falling onto Severus's tall, black cloaked figure, a deep sigh leaving your nostrils. Was this a good idea? Crossing the line with a colleague? Or was this a recipe for disaster? You wanted it to work out, but you had your doubts. Minerva's words were etched deep into your mind, and they slowly slithered out of the woodworks, chanting in your head tauntingly.

'I'm not sure you're aware of just how far his trauma goes.'

'Save your heart. Severus will only break it.'

'Focus on Benjamin.'

Oh, Merlin, Ben.

What were you going to do about him...? Do you tell him you kissed Severus? Do you just break it off silently? No, he deserves to know. You needed to be an adult and admit to your wrongs, whether it made you look like a sack of shit or not. You'd made your bed, and now you had to lie in it.

Just as you were going to return to Severus's side, a familiar voice called your name.

"Y/N!"

You turned around, your head snapping towards the voice like a bolt of lightning. All colour had drained from your face as your widened eyes became glued onto the one person you did not want to see right now.

Ben jogged towards you, a worried expression twisting his features.

No, please, no, not right now. This could not be happening right now...

talk about perfect timing, hey?

sorry this was such a short chapter!! i wanted to make it longer, but what better than to keep you in suspense? i hope you have partly forgiven me for this chapter... </3

let me know what you thought!! your replies on the previous chapter had me rolling omfg.

daily reminder that i love you all and to make sure you are taking care of yourselves!! thank you all so much for your continued support, it really means a lot to me, and i hope i am doing this story justice, i have- well, had a plan, but it's sort of gone a different way... however, i’m liking it. :) i hope you are too!

Part 11!

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[nyxthejinx]

Answering to this desperate cry for help

Maaan this was so much fun fr, i hope I made these bad boys justice. Also, didn't know what kind of format I should be using and especially how to repost the original thing, since copying and pasting on the reblog would be absolute hell rip

𝐓𝐖: people biting each other but in an affectionate way, idk lemme know if there's more

𝐅𝐭.: Dottore, Xiao, Childe - GN!Reader

𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 1.1k (in total)

𝐋𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨: 3rd Made in Abyss soundtrack - Kevin Penkin (yes, it's that good, no comment)

𝐃𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐞

OHOO he's gonna be so intrigued by this weird habit of yours.

We all know he's not big on social interactions and all -he barely values human life- but when you came into the picture he felt invested in someone for the first time. Hence he observes... Normal people, to learn the basics.

He's smart, a quick learner. Will understand in no time your likes and dislikes, but one day you?? Bite him? Chomp like a feral newborn kitten? Oh, his scholar personality spikes through the roof.

Dottore's never seen anyone bite their partner like you do, it confuses him at first, although he won't say anything and just chuckle. He'd rather observe you and come to his own conclusions before asking.

Was it a one time thing? When, how and where do you like to do it? Is there a deeper meaning, a show of intimacy? Need for attention? Affection?

Yeah he'll treat it like a maths equation, that's how he is.

Some days you'd see him without his mask, leaning particularly close to your face. Other times he'd set his gloves aside and let his digits linger on your cheeks and jaw for every little thing. (He knows he’s difficult to bite because of his clothes)

"Oh Dear, look at your lips, they're chapped/full of crumbs/smeared with any other kind of food/every single excuse he can come up with."

It takes you a bit longer than you would've wanted, but you realise his true intentions eventually. If you feel smug you can just chomp on him randomly and see him lose his mind (he thought he'd figured everything out rip dottore.exe).

I advise against it though, he'd repay the torture tenfold. (aka not cuddle with you even if you ask nicely).

Overall, Dottore finds this habit of yours cute. You're a nice little, innocent thing in his eyes and that just adds to your charm.

Yeah you can be a 1.90m tall menace of a person and he'd still tease you, an arrogant, mean jerk >:(

After some time he starts biting you back (ouch shark teeth), not in a painful way ofc. He's so casual with it, most likely to strike when you least expect it just to see your surprised and/or flustered face.

Or to have you chomping in return, even ;)

I'd say 7.5/10, good chomping partner but will "fight" back.

𝐗𝐢𝐚𝐨

My guy, poor guy.

He's another social inept, we all know why.

He started to learn about human customs after meeting you, and you've helped him out a lot, but he's still so stiff.

He probably gets a heart attack every time you give him a surprise hug. The day you chomp on him his soul leaves his body.

It's not that he's a scaredy cat, physical touch just overwhelms his senses if he's not prepared :((

Asks you to tell him beforehand next time.

But aside from that he doesn't seem to mind. He finds every human custom weird in a way, this one is no exception, and eventually it becomes routine yeah?

I think he's a perfect subject for chomping, with all the exposed skin he has. I mean, look at his shoulders! The urge to sneak up from behind and just CHOMP.

He's got muscles for days too, won't shatter your teeth on his bones. AND HIS CHEEKS- his baby cheeks, they look so soft how can you not bite those.

But yeah, just give him some time and he'll get used to this.

Xiao's not stupid either, he notices right away that you're the only human partaking in this activity, or in public at least. Lowkey feels happy and proud to have you as a partner, you're so special and unique :( <33

At some point he'll want to try it out as well, but he's sooo shy about it and a bit scared he'll hurt you. You gotta make him confess with bone crushing hugs.

When he eventually chomps back he's UGHH so soft with it. For Xiao it's more about the meaning and the bonding experience than the chomp itself.

9/10 if you're fine with doing all the chomping. 8/10 if you want chomps back, but definetly recommended.

𝐂𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐞

Run. RUN. RUN FOR YOUR CHEEKS' LIFE.

He is THE chomping menace.

Let me tell ya, you're putting your life on the line. It's like a declaration of war and he will not hesitate to respond with all he's got.

We know for a fact that he's always up for a challenge. If you're crazy enough to engage and bite him first, well I hope you have a survival plan for the rest of your life cus he won't stop.

It can and will escalate in a "fight" if you're in a private space (you know the tickle fights where you become a mess of tangled limbs? That.) If you try that in public though? He's gonna look at you like a damn predator.

He'll eat your cheeks once you get home, good luck.

His bites are rough-ish too, unfortunately for you. He’d never hurt you on purpose, and is always careful with his strength, but in the heat of battle he’ll forget; 7 times out of 10 you leave the field with a 32 teeth bite mark. 

I think he is more of a cheek guy than anything. They're always available and easy to reach, regardless of your height, and it's also so intimate because who else touches your face? No one, aside from him.

He's the chosen one.

And don't think it will stop at the first time, no no. You've unlocked a new hobby for him. He'll put so much effort in it, it's terrifying.

If you act surprised or flustered well, bonus points in his opinion. Your face is just priceless and will make a habit to make you react that way.

At that point you either fight back or succumb. His soft spots are his stomach (duh, nibble on the exposed skin when he's in his work clothes, I bet he's ticklish), his nape, collarbones and overall the base of his neck.

The rest of his body is still a good chomping surface, but his instincts kick in and his muscles go taut, it's like biting a rock and has no effect on him.

Childe will definitely give you a hard time. It's up to you to take advantage of the right moment and give him a good revenge chomp.

Honestly, he's my fave ever but I'll give him a 5/10 just because of that. Can't even bite the man in peace anymore 🙄

DON'T copy/repost my work. REBLOG instead! ©nyxthejinx

[starlightsearches]

ooooooooh can we eget a track 8 with edward nashton? maybve it's his first time but he doesnt want to tell the reader that?? love your writing 🖤

Moving Too Fast

Track 8: Start Me Up by The Rolling Stones - Give me a character and a NSFW prompt (or give me free rein) and I'll write a short blurb or headcanons about it.

Edward Nashton x F! Reader

AN: Thanks for the suggestion, friend! Here's a little love letter from me to pre-mature ejaculation uwu. Comments, likes, and reblogs are always appreciated mwah mwah

Warnings: 18+ only, some language, lots of self-loathing from Eddie, sexism, mentions of creepy behavior, making out, and pre-mature ejaculation. Let me know if I missed anything!

Eddie could have sworn it was three dates.

Isn't that what everybody said? Third date go great? Try these six tips to make him yours for sure.

Or maybe he just got that idea from some stupid magazine back when he was in college. The ones he'd shove inside his jacket before the guy ringing up all the ramen packets and dandruff shampoo would notice.

Magazines he'd read whenever his roommate was gone—when he'd stroke his cock nice and slow at the lurid words, still getting used to the idea of pleasure, guilt always sitting at the top of his stomach like an oil slick—reading about all the ways a woman could touch you. Too scared at the sight of tits to look at any real porn.

High school was where he learned what it meant if a girl let you touch her on the first date. Eddie had spent every hellish minute in those fucking locker rooms with his head ducked low, trying to avoid attention, curling in on himself to hide the body he was so ashamed of and didn't understand.

He still heard what the other boys said. Learned all the words—slut, whore, skank—practiced saying them under his breath whenever he was alone so they'd come out naturally if the occasion ever arose. (It never did.)

But this isn't a third date. It's not even a date. And Eddie's not sure what that's supposed to say about you.

He doesn't think you're a slut. There haven't been any other men here on the nights Eddie watched your doorway (before you'd ever said a word to him) from the nearby alley, standing guard, looking for glimpses of you through the windows.

No other men, and he's glad, because there's no way for him to know what he'd have done.

But you do seem eager for him—or for this, at least—with the little noises you're making against his lips, kissing him in the darkness of your bedroom, pulling him against you and all your warm skin.

A word like eager doesn't even belong in the same room as Eddie. Not directed at him, although it emanates from his body like a disease, keeping everybody at a distance.

Everybody but you.

His clumsy hands grip at the extra fabric of your baggy t-shirt where it hangs at your sides, his hold so tight it could rip at any moment.

"You can take it off," you whisper, the words slurring out in the quick pause before you're kissing him again. Eddie's lungs are getting smaller as he lifts the fabric, knuckles bumping against your waist, catching at the edge of your bra. He's lucky his grip doesn't falter, or he'd have to start over.

But maybe Eddie wouldn't mind spending the rest of his life like this—the Sisyphean task of taking of your clothes a riddle he'd love to spend all his time working out—baring your skin but going no farther.

Never needing to show the vulnerable parts of himself.

He has to pull back so you can get your shirt off the rest of the way, balling up the warm fabric in his hands. Eddie thinks about holding it to his nose and breathing deep, letting your scent wash over and through him.

But that will have to wait for another time. When you're not here. When the lock-picking kit he ordered finally shows up on his doorstep.

He rubs the fabric between his fingers instead, gripping hard enough his knuckles turn white. You drop down to the mattress, tits bouncing, and Eddie's vision blackens at the edges.

"Come on, Eds. What're you waiting for?"

To wake up. He can't think of a better answer, so he doesn't say anything, shins hitting the bed, looming over you with his too-warm body and heavy breaths. And none of that makes you push him away, pulling him closer, your body pressing and rubbing against his.

Tits pillowing against his chest as you cup your hands around his neck, tongue dipping deeper into his mouth when you raise your chin. One of your legs hooks around the back of his ankle, stroking at the leg of his jeans.

And worst of all, your palms—warm, and a little damp—slipping the bottom of his shirt out from under the waistband of his pants. Eddie feels the press of your hands against his skin like a brand, and he hopes your touch will stain him somehow because he'll never feel you like this again. Not after what comes next.

Eddie's already too close. You've hardly done anything and he's close, so hard it's painful, his tender dick pressed up against your thigh, warm from your body even through the layers he wears. He feels his heavy balls drawing tight against his skin, so desperate to spill somewhere besides his own hand.

Eddie literally begs his body to hold on, to wait, pleading silently with god, with whoever could be listening, with his own shame to stop the inevitable next step.

It's no use, as he knew it would be. Eddie cums with a moan that mortifies him down in his bones.

Your hands stop their movements, lingering questioningly at the space above his hips.

"Eddie?"

He feels your breath hit his face, lips no longer against his when you press your head further into the pillows, looking up at him as his cum seeps into the fabric of his jeans, hot and heavier than he's used to, probably soaking through and smearing over all your lovely skin.

"Eddie, did you—"

He shoots back with a cry before you can get the question out, unsure where to look, pressing his hands over the wet spot on his crotch, all his visible skin bright red and flushed.

"I'm—oh, god—I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm—"

He's crying, actually, steps away from full-blown, whiny sobs. The one chance he had to be close to someone, to be with someone, and he's ruined it.

The same way he ruins everything.

"I- this doesn't—this doesn't, uh, usually happen."

It's a lie, even without the implication that this has happened with other women. Eddie never lasts long when he's thinking about you, no matter what he tries.

It's a weak attempt, but he has to save face, has to kill the sickness inside of him.

Has to hope against hope that you won't laugh in his face.

Eddie thinks he's imagining it when he feels your hand at his wrist, insistent in its grip until your eyes meet his, not mocking, like he was certain they would be, but curious, and fervent.

"Really?"

There's this lilting appetite in your voice that Eddie could never imagine, that tells him just how dull all his daydreams had been.

"Eddie," you whisper, lips painted wet by your tongue, and you're on your knees, closing the distance he left open, "that's—"

Whatever it is, Eddie doesn't find out. You don't finish your sentence before you're kissing him again.

[jaylver]

SILVER SPRINGS — P.JS

synopsis: falling in love and starting a band with a man who you swore to be your soulmate was your first mistake. after your break up, you wrote a song about him, not knowing performing it with him would soon haunt him for a long time.

pairings: guitarist!jay x singer afab!reader

genre: lovers to exes, broken relationship, break up, band au

warning(s): angst, profanities

wc: 1480

a/n: yes this is another jay fic ... guilty. and it's also a fic based off a song ... guilty. dedicated to any fleetwood mac fans because this is based off their song 'silver springs' and also inspired by stevie nicks and lindsey buckingham's relationship, specifically that ONE performance. hope you enjoy this one! please leave a feedback and reblogs are appreciated!

masterlist | © jaylver 2023 all rights reserved

Who said breaking up with your boyfriend who also happened to be part of your band was a great idea? Not you. 

You blamed the fame. Something in you had a feeling that blowing up and gaining attention would eventually turn sour, but you didn’t think it would affect your relationship. It got to both you and him.

Jay, your first love and the man who you started the band with, called it quits right before a show. 

He was a sweetheart, and he has always had decent manners, but to break up with you before performing was a low blow. Maybe it was an outburst that he could no longer hold in, or he just had an intrusive urge to do so, but whatever it was, it was so unprofessional and not cool.

Obviously, you turned up on stage almost ripping the guitar out of his hand and smashing it into pieces, but you didn't. Instead, your eyes were red and puffy, voice hoarse and stage presence at its all time low, just like you. The drummer of your band, Heeseung, was avoiding the tension actively, whilst Yunjin on the keyboard was casting concerned glaces. Then there was Jake, the other guitarist, glancing in worry between you and Jay.

It didn't take long before fans figured out something was wrong, and their theories were proven correct when the news got leaked out. Just great, wasn't it? Especially when you were at your peak of fame.

"Oh, don't say that she was pretty," 

It was pathetic. Arguing with Jay and breaking down crying one night when he came back to your shared apartment to get his things.

You didn't expect your sudden outburst during then. You admitted that it was you who picked an argument first, but how could you not when he brought up his recent date?

"Did she say that she loved you?" You mocked, noticing the things you've said had angered him equally.

"Fuck off, would you? We're done, alright?"

His words cut deep, unexpected and surprising. You scoffed, turning your head away from him. "I loved you years ago, but have you ever loved me?"

"Don't talk bullshit with me, Y/N. I've always loved you!"

"Then why would you talk to her while we were together?" You choked down a sob, remembering the rumours plastered over the tabloids, ones where he never denied. That was when you began not to love him, losing sparks and devotion.

Jay was silent, jaw clenching and the grip on his boxes tightened. He knew you struck bullseye and he couldn't deny it. He was aware that he's a prick, a scumbag that didn't deserve you, so he'd gladly take all the punches from you, but seeing you cry was making him weak.

“Can you tell me, was it worth it?"

The silence followed, tension filling the air around you. He shook his head, holding onto his boxes and turning around for the door. That was the end, wasn’t it? 

“I know I could’ve loved you but you wouldn’t let me,” you said softly, falling onto a chair, needing to have a seat before your feelings overwhelmed you.

Without anything more from him, the door closed, leaving you to yourself in the home you once shared with the love of your life. Now, it was an empty shell reminding you of times you had together, continuously haunting you even as you took a pen and started writing down lyrics into your notebook.

Releasing the song you wrote about Jay was probably the best and worst decision you’ve pulled.

Despite the break up, the state of your band wasn’t affected, instead you two took the professional path and kept it together for the sake of achieving each other’s dreams. It was hard and definitely awkward at the start, but you grew accustomed to everything eventually.

What you didn’t expect was the song blowing up. The fans loved it, they ate it up, taking in every part of the dramatics of your break up. Of course, the label and your bandmates didn’t mind the fame that came along with it, but you could tell Jay was bothered.

It was the night of your first performance after your break up and the song’s success. You mustered the little courage left in you, hoping you wouldn’t crumble whilst singing the song you wrote about him, or literally any song in general. Thankfully, the set list was short, and all you needed to do was sing then leave. Easier said than done. 

You heard the screams of fans, felt the flashing of lights, but all you could think of was Jay who stood to your left, setting his electric guitar up. It might've taken you a while to come to an idea of getting back at him, but it was definitely a great one. Singing the song you wrote about him while all he could do was listen, coming on stage and be reminded of you, those could be your best revenge. 

The familiar sounds of the guitar began the song slowly, you sang naturally and didn't think much about it. That's when you felt his lingering gaze on you, the same eyes that stared back at you with love once were filled with unspeakable emotions.

As the song continued on, reaching almost the end, the tension between you and him only grew. You turned to face him now, holding tightly onto the microphone stand, pouring out your vulnerability with each word, never breaking eye contact once.

"I'll follow you down 'til the sound of my voice will haunt you, give me just a chance!" you sang harder, seeing him strumming his guitar with equal strain.

"You'll never get away from the sound of the woman that loves you," hands reaching out to him, you felt as if you were the only ones there. "Was I such a fool?"

You were professing your love for the last time, knowing he had already moved on, you were just a fool. Anger, pure rage were genuine and raw as it continuously flowed from you. 

"You'll never get away, never get away, never get away!" 

Every word from you came out like a spell, cursing him with every ounce of you. Your lyrics were placing an eternal curse on him, one that has him never getting away from you, your voice and your pain.

Jay stared back with the same ferocity, his eyes screaming loud, gaze never leaving you for even a second.

Until the last minute of your stage, you only learnt to breathe deeply and stop your stare on your past lover, legs weak and head spiralling. Oh God, you need a whole tub of ice cream once you get home.

Being left alone in your own room backstage after closing the set, you finally had the freedom to collect your emotions and thoughts, still shaking a little. It didn't take long before you heard a knock on the door, expecting Yunjin to come and check up on you, but it wasn't.

It was Jay.

"Hey," he breathed out, seeing your seemingly beaten down state.

"Hi," you couldn't believe he was here, not when you literally sang a song about him to his face earlier.

"I–uh–just wanted to come and tell you that … it was a great performance. You did well,"

"Oh," that totally caught you off guard. "Thank you,"

The awkwardness between you and him made you cringe. It wasn't an everyday occurence to be in a band with your ex and having to see him frequently, especially when he came to compliment you.

"I hate this, Y/N. I don't want you to hate me but I understand if you do. I'm sorry, for the things I've done and said. Just … don't be a stranger,"

"I won't," you said shakily, gulping in anxiety. "I've got too much love for you, it doesn't just dissipate after years. You're always going to be someone to me,"

Jay smiled, releasing a breath of relief. "I love you too, and I wish nothing but happiness for you,"

"For the both of us."

Months passed and the success of the band only grew bigger. You and Jay were on civil terms, but nothing was the same as it was.

Jay might've slowly gotten over you and the break up, but it seemed that you kept haunting him.

Walking down the streets, he saw your face on bilboards for campaigns you've shot for. Going into stores, he heard your voice playing from the speakers. Performing on stage, you were there, under the bright lights, shining and sparkling. 

He would never get away from the sound of the woman that loved him. He would never escape you.

Time might've casted a spell on him, but he would never forget you and you would always, always haunt him.

( © jaylver all rights reserved. do NOT copy, plagiarise or edit my work and repost whatsoever. once discovered will be exposed and blacklisted. )

☆ permanent taglist (open):

@silentkarnival @strvlveera @freshsaladbowl @bejewelledgirl @fakeuwus @yenqa @hsgwrld @ilovegyuvin @enhacatalog

[romewritingshop]

Biker Book Club

Fandom: Jujutsu Kaisen

Pairing: Biker!Sukuna Ryoumen x Reader

MASTERLIST

A/N: So I wrote a smut and here's something to tide people over whilst I'm working on Part 3 of my Choso series. Thanks and I hope you enjoy. Let me know what you think! Follow, comment or reblog, IDC because I enjoy writing this fic. Please pay attention before reading.

NO UNDER 18s 🔞

WARNING: Smut, Explicit Sex, Cowgirl, Blowjob, Fingering, Use of Lube, Almost unprotected sex, Use of Protection, Slight Choking, Gagging, Slight dominance, Swearing, Talk of sex, Loss of Virginity, talks of cunnilingus and face sitting, cum eating

This wasn't where he expected to find his next good fuck but somehow he found you. He noticed you sitting at a beanbag in the library. Your glasses were pushed right up your face.

Even the way you were dressed was getting to him as he took in your black straight jeans and matching woolly turtleneck. You were reading a book with an interesting cover, it had skulls and thorns with cursive that made it difficult for him to guess the title.

What drew him to notice you was the way your face was deadpanned, almost looking uninterested in what you were reading. Why continue reading a book you're uninterested in? Your legs were crossed over and you had white headphones covering your ears, probably blocking all the sound.

He came here to look for Geto and Gojo, apparently he needed to go over details for the gig they were being security detail for. The two of them were meant to be in the library for some college assignment. Sukuna stood out with his facial tattoos and black leather jacket.

Right now, he wanted you to warm his bed tonight, you seemed like the type of girl who liked to be wined and dined which wasn't so bad as long as he got to use them however he wanted. Rolling back his shoulders, eyes locked on target, he stepped towards you.

You were feeling hot under the collar as you read your book and followed along the words with your audio book. It was embarrassing reading this in your library but lately your parents weren't allowing you any privacy. They felt that you stayed indoors too much thus you went to the library to prove that you did go out.

You were a grown woman who should be allowed to do what she wanted but you worked a retail job whilst being rejected for different jobs as an admin assistant. Apparently they didn't want to hire an inexperienced graduate which made no sense.

You were stuck to reading smutty books in libraries and working inhumane hours for minimum pay. The book you were reading currently involved a tall tattooed biker that fell for the mayor's daughter and it was hot as hell. Currently you were listening/reading about them getting hot and heavy in the mayor's office during a party.

You were just getting to the bit where the biker was going down on his knees when something tapped you on your knee which made you drop your book, phone and headphones. You let out a short scream but shut up quickly when you realised that you were in a library.

The first thing you saw were black laced boots, nicely polished before trailing up to ripped black jeans. Your eyes went up to a white form fitting t-shirt underneath a black leather jacket. He had pink hair with a black undercut which was an interesting colour in comparison to his attire.

For a moment you thought you were hallucinating and the biker from your book had somehow come to life. However the facial tattoos reminded you that it wasn't the male lead, this person was actually standing in front of you.

Sukuna found it cute the way you were reacting to him, shocked like he caught you doing something nasty. Although, it didn't take him much to realise that you probably were as he picked up your book, headphones and phone to hand back to you. He took a look at the title and snorted.

"What the hell kinda book is this?"

You crossed your eyebrows as you folded your arms expecting him to return your things. You stood up, but suddenly felt a little nervous at the fact that this man was a whole foot taller than you.

"It's an action book about a biker."

That wasn't a whole lie, the book involved a biker and a lot of actions. Just more of the sexual type but she wasn't going to explicitly say what the book was to a total random stranger. Especially one that looked like a handsome jerk.

"An action book?"

"Yes, why?"

He shrugged, tucking his hands into his jean pockets.

"Why are you reading it if it looks boring?"

You frown as you look at the book cover. It was far from boring. What did he even mean by that but he answered your question.

"It's just, I came in looking for some people … I noticed you looking bored while you were reading."

It took a second before you made an 'oh'. Sometimes reading smut made your face go straight, especially if it was written in a generic formula. You pursed back a smile as you put your hand out to ask for your book.

"Well, I was reading a very important scene and wanted to focus."

Sukuna didn't really believe you as he opened the book, flicking to where your bookmark was. With a quick scan of the page you were on, he noticed an interesting word which made him quirk an eyebrow at you, which made you realise that his eyebrows were pierced.

"Important scene, huh? So you don't mind if I read that?"

Your eyes widened as you lunged forward to grab your book. You don't know how much he saw but you weren't going to let him find out more. Sukuna was quicker as he swung his arm to raise the book above his head as he tutted.

"Ah, ah ah! Mind if I read, Rosy?"

"It's not your kind of book."

"Maybe it is, Rosy, what would you know?"

"You haven't even read the book from the start! You're not gonna understand a thing if you start from the middle."

"So what? I just wanna know why this is such an important scene."

You scoffed as you dropped your hands to your hips. You couldn't believe this guy. Sukuna smirked as he glanced up at the title page, you were clearly hiding something about this book.

"'Sides, why are you reading about a biker?"

"Because they're interesting."

"You ever met one, Rosy?"

"Pft … where would you find one?"

There was a smug grin on Sukuna's face as he spread his arms to gesture at himself, answering your question which made your eyes widen. The coincidence was creepy but Sukuna almost laughed at the reaction on your face.

"You're a biker?"

"Yup but that's a part time hobby. I run a security company, lending out freelance security guards to events and people."

You nod and he brings a hand out to introduce himself. Sukuna was his name, it was interesting and even Sukuna found your name nice to repeat on his tongue but he liked the nickname he gave, Rosy. He had you on the hook, all he needed to do was to line and then reel in.

"So, Rosy, did you happen to see two tall guys: one with a dark black ponytail and the other with white hair and sunglasses?"

You scratch your head as you think back, shaking your head. Sukuna looks at your book one more time before finally handing it back to you, along with your headphones and phone. He was gonna get you in his bed tonight as he exhaled.

"I see. By the way, are you doing anything tonight?"

You deadpanned at the fact that Sukuna was cocky enough to ask what you were doing. You weren't that easy although this has been a literal dream. He was probably a red flag in disguise as you amuse his ask.

"Why? You plan to ask me out on a date?"

"Well a certain someone won't let me read this important scene without reading the whole book so I want you to read the book to me. Think of it as a … what's that thing those housewives do where they read a book together?"

"A book club?"

"Yeah, Rosy, a book club. We'll have our own little book club."

Sukuna was amused as he watched you make several confused expressions, looking at him, the book cover and the pages.

"What?"

"Come on, Rosy-"

"Why are you calling me, Rosy?"

"I promise, you'll have a good night. All we'll do is read your book. What have you got to lose?"

It wasn't much and this was a good opportunity for you to get out of the house like your mother wanted. You tapped your toe, looking down before looking back up at his face. He was persistent for sure and as long as you held out your temptation to dive in, you'll have an interesting night.

"No funny business?"

Sukuna wanted to snort at the fact that that was a total lie but he straightened his posture and raised his hand to show his fingers weren't crossed.

"No funny business, Rosy. So your place or mine for our book club?"

"Yours."

This was too easy as Sukuna took your phone out of your hands, he unlocked it and typed a few things before handing it back to you. You looked as he saved his number as 'Sukuna' with a skull emoji.

"Send me a text with your address when you're ready and I'll pick you up, in the full biker fit and motorcycle. Don't forget your book."

Without letting you say another word, Sukuna walked off leaving you confused yet lowkey excited at the fact that you were probably going on a date of your fantasies. 

It took you half an hour to get home, your parents were still at work so you went up to your room to change. You were going to wear your plainest most unattractive clothes which was a white button up and a long lilac coloured skirt with a nice silver necklace and earrings.

He surely wouldn't be aroused by these clothes as you pack your bag with your book. You look at your phone, hesitating to send the text. You could just not go … he seemed like a conceited douchebag. But he promised an interesting night and heck he might end up being a highlight in your boring miserable life.

You sent the message and not long after you hear your phone ping with his response that he'll be at yours in twenty. This was plenty of time, you took this moment to ponder on your thoughts. You couldn't make your mind up as you were interrupted by intrusive thoughts begging you to sleep with him.

You didn't know much about him and he seemed like the type of guy that had one night stands. You didn't want to be a conquest. Plus you didn't know if he was good in bed. The cocky ones were usually all talk no bark. You had a sneaking suspicion that he maybe was good in bed.

A loud roar sound from outside, this made you jump as you rushed to your window to see who had a lion only for you to notice Sukuna outside your front door with his motorcycle. That was embarrassing as Sukuna caught your eye in the window and waved.

It was time to go as you took a few quick breaths, going down and sending a text to your mother before you stepped out of your front door, locking the house and walking to the tattooed biker who was leaning against the seat of his parked motorcycle. He was still in the same clothes as before and he did not shy away from looking you up and down.

"You look nice, Rosy. Didn't know you had more colours in your wardrobe."

"I see you didn't change."

"Of course not. We're doing a book club. I'll dress nice when we have our first date."

He winked at you which made you huff before he reached around the right side of the motorcycle to hand you a black coloured helmet. You turned it around your hands in surprise as he then pulled out a red helmet for himself, sitting it on his head and lifting the visor up to look at you.

"What's the matter?"

"I didn't expect you to have a helmet."

This made Sukuna laugh as his head reared back, shaking his head. You may have read too many biker stories to come up with that assumption as he took the helmet from your hands, to sit on top of your head.

"Of course I do. Don't want my book club partner to have an accident before she can read her book to me."

You roll your eyes as Sukuna sits the helmet on top of your head properly, adjusting the strap before checking if it was secure on your head, he gives a nod and goes to take his motorcycle off its stand, sitting on it and starting it up. It had a nice loud purr that almost vibrated in your chest as he cocked his head to gesture you.

You look at Sukuna and then at your clothes, realising that maybe your plan to look unsexy may have made it unsafe.

"Sukuna, how am I gonna sit on your bike?"

"You're just gonna have to hold your skirt up, Rosy."

You crouch slightly to lift the hem of your skirt up to your knees as you step up to Sukuna, holding your skirt in your left hand and using your right hand to rest on his shoulder to help you bring a leg around his bike. You're seated properly and bunch the skirt in the middle of your legs, unsure of where to put your right hand.

Sukuna can hear you think too hard as he gets your hand to hold onto his waist. He pushes your visor down as he warns.

"Hold tight, Rosy. Squeeze or scoot closer if you're scared. I don't mind."

One rev. Two revs and the motorcycle is kicked into ignition as Sukuna pushes forward slightly before beginning to drive to his place. He's smooth at driving as he effortlessly weaves in between cars, surprisingly it's not too fast or too slow and you're able to actually look around you

Motorcycle driving was a different experience as the lit lamps gave the city a lively vibe than the sleepy one you often used to see when looking through a car window. You could feel the rush of wind on your arms as you tighten your grip on Sukuna.

He was giving you a wonderful experience and it isn't long until he reaches an apartment complex, he parks his motorcycle near the kerb. He steps off first before giving you a hand so that you could lift yourself off his bike.

You had a good time, Sukuna could tell as you took off your helmet and gave him a chance to see your exhilarated facial expression. He too took off his helmet as he led you through the doors, straight to an elevator to the third floor.

His apartment is neat and tidy with an open floor living room and kitchen. The colours were dull and grey, almost like it hasn't been lived in for a while as you examine.

"It looks nice."

"Thanks. Only moved here two months ago so I didn't get a chance to redecorate."

"Ah, where were you before that?"

"Around Japan. Never settled in one place. When I set up my company, I decided to settle here. Makes it easier to list the business."

You gave a nod, looking around, there weren't many pictures. Was he alone? There were two doors in front of you, one door to your right and one to your left as Sukuna pointed at each one.

"The far left one is the bathroom, next to it is a guest room, my room and then a laundry room."

You nod, taking your shoes and socks off by the front door as you go over to his dark grey cushion sofas, setting your bag on the white coffee table. It was better if you knew more about him and surprisingly he wasn't shying away from any personal questions which made you wonder what he was intending.

"Yeah. Been on my own for a long time."

"You live alone?"

He was an interesting open book. As you get your book out, he heads to the kitchen to look in his fridge.

"Want a drink? I got water, beer or orange juice."

You crinkle your nose at the beer and juice, instead asking for water. He comes back with two bottles of water, handing one to you and taking a sip from the other one. He was definitely not what you assumed him to be.

"No beer?"

"Don't feel like it."

That was a lie as you picked your book up, flicking to get to the front page after making sure that your bookmark was in its proper place. How were you going to do this? But Sukuna answered that as he sat right next to you on the double sofa, his arm spread on the back and his legs spread wide.

"Go ahead and start, Rosy."

With no other qualms, you started to read. You had a nice soothing voice as you began the story and Sukuna was getting into the vibe. He was curious and interested as he asked you all sorts of questions about the characters, further clarifications about certain scenes and actions.

It was a nice intellectual discussion and Sukuna was for once enjoying with you. In fact he was slowly beginning to let go of his idea that you would be sleeping in his bed. He would much rather read which surprised him.

You had reached halfway and your hands started to get clammy as you were getting to the scene you were reading earlier. This was going to be embarrassing as you rolled your shoulder back, feeling a slight stiffness as you paused your reading. Looking up at him over the book, he seemed calm and interested which somehow made it harder to ask.

"What's up, Rosy? Wanna take a break?"

You were almost thankful as Sukuna glanced at his phone, noticing you had read for a good hour and a half. Yeah you needed a break.

"Let's take a break."

"Thanks, I'll just go to the bathroom and be back."

You step off the sofa and shuffle to the bathroom, rushing in and locking the door behind you. Taking deeper, harsher breaths to try and calm your beating heart. Surely Sukuna had to have some inkling that this was not an action book else why would he insist on you reading it to him.

You pee and wash your hands, freshening up and shaking away your nerves. It was just a book and fiction, you read it quite a lot, heck you can pass off your facial expressions to not be a giveaway. But Sukuna was going to know that this was a porn book and he was going to tease you endlessly.

After a few minutes, you leave the bathroom and rejoin Sukuna on the sofa, picking up the book to pick up where you left off when he plucks it out of your hands, offering.

"Why don't I read? This is a book club and we should share reading turns. Besides, I wouldn't want you to overexert your voice."

This was the worst idea Sukuna had as he began to read where you left off. All of sudden the temperature dropped, his voice dropped as he started to talk about the female lead encountering the male lead. You kept your body still as you listened to Sukuna begin to slow his pace.

Talking about the male lead getting down on his knees, kissing a trail up the female lead's legs and nuzzling his face into her panties. It felt like a whisper in your ear and for the moment you felt like you had been transported into the mayor's office and Sukuna was the one in between your legs.

His hands stroked up and down your legs whilst he sniffed at your panties, you felt yourself lull into a dizzy lusty spell as you closed your eyes to fully manifest the image in your mind. The voice stopped and you were back in reality as you opened your eyes to watch Sukuna pout.

"Is my voice so bad that you fell asleep?"

You hadn't fallen asleep as you blink your eyes, furrowing your brows at Sukuna. His lips twitched slightly and you had a feeling that he knew what this book was all along.

"No … not at all."

"We were just getting to the scene you said was important and I can see why."

You huffed, bringing your bare feet to tuck under you as you face him fully, straight posture and slightly leaning forward.

"You knew what this scene was?!"

"I caught a glimpse of the word 'suck' back in the library but snuck a better look while you were in the bathroom. It's an interesting book."

"Interesting book? It's got explicit sex scenes!"

"And? Sex is natural. There's nothing to be ashamed about. We will have an intellectual grown-up discussion about it. I'll continue."

That he did, he brought the story to life as he read about the oral scene in the mayor's office. You tried to keep a straight face but inside you felt yourself slowly burning, from shame or excitement the two were blurring.

Sukuna, too, was getting hot under his shirt, having shed his jacket now to show you his arms which were muscular and tattooed making your eyes wonder where else is tattooed. The book wasn’t what you were expecting, since it was meant to be a highly smutty pornographic book.

It was nothing, since you listened to the story. The main leads were hot and heavy in her room and the office. You had passed your bookmark and reading the climax was … underwhelming for you. Apparently the male lead was using the female lead to get revenge on her dad by screwing her in his office. She finds out, they argue and they make up. The big sex scene which your friends hyped up was unbearably tame.

Sukuna found it incredibly hot as he finished off his last sentence, closing the book and turning it over in his hands. He got a few good tips from the book which will help him as he took a moment to look at his book partner. His eyebrows crossed with confusion as he took in your disappointed disgruntled expression.

"Rosy?"

"Yeah?"

"What you think of the book?"

You look at the book cover, taking it from his hands and reading over the reviews. In all honesty, you couldn't believe how disappointing the book was despite the four/five star reviews.

"You tell me first, Sukuna."

"Well … the plot is interesting. Both the guy and the girl had interesting chemistry which made the love scenes hotter. I liked it. Especially that argument scene."

His words eventually stopped at the growing disappointed look on your face.

"So you didn't like the book?"

"It just … I have completely opposite opinions to you. The guy and girl have no chemistry. There was no captivating conflict and just the sex scenes were lackluster."

Sukuna tilted his head, you were unhappy? He wanted to grin so badly, hearing you be so disgusted by the lack of creative sex, making him wonder what you were into.

"Lackluster?"

"Yes. I've read better books than that. With better chemistry and sex."

"Really? What books are they?"

You were about to answer his question when you clamped your mouth shut. Did he truly want to know what books were better? Nah there was no way. He was just doing this to get you to have sex with him. You huff and let out a sarcastic sneer.

"Maybe when we have our next book club meeting."

"Sure, you're free tomorrow?"

"Wait … what?"

You wanted to laugh, say that he's joking and get him to give up but the serious expression on his face confirmed that he was interested. More than that, he would read more books with you.

"I'm serious. Look … I'm not gonna lie, at first I wanted to have sex."

It shouldn't surprise you. It really shouldn't. This was an expectation whenever you hung out with men who wanted a quick fuck. Basically a fuck boy but somehow you were surprised and taken aback by the fact that he outright admitted his true intentions. You wished you could be disgusted but instead you felt … vindicated.

"But when you started reading and then I took over, I enjoyed reading. I especially enjoy the conversation we're having, which surprises me as much as it might surprise you. I could be satisfied just reading a book with you, tonight."

You blinked once. Blinked twice, ruminating over his words. You least expected this outcome. Did your outfit work all too well? You look down at your clothes before looking up at Sukuna, just perplexed and befuddled. Sukuna seemed to reveal something to you which made him incredibly more attractive to you.

"You're not just saying that to guilt trip or manipulate me?"

"I might look like an asshole but … I'm not just saying that without any meaning. I'm serious."

This time he called you by your actual name, not that god awful nickname. He was serious. Dead serious. Somehow that made him more attractive. You shook your head harshly to knock that thought out of your head. You were in some kind of mood. Sukuna watched you rather nervously.

"Right. Well … I guess … thank you for being honest."

Sukuna gave a nod as he turned the book in his hands, changing the topic back.

"Well thanks for reading this book to me. I guess we agree to disagree on this book. Although I still find that argument scene hot. Especially when she grazes her teeth on his dick. Shit had my dick twitch."

At the mention of his dick, your eyes dropped down to see the imprint of it against his right thigh. What the fuck? Your eyes widen slightly, looking at his imprint. He looked like he had quite a bit of length on him.

"You liked the teeth? Isn't that like a no-no in blowjobs?"

Sukuna shrugged, looking up and answering the question.

"There is no rulebook on how to give a blowjob. You just go with the way you feel. Never really considered the thought of teeth on my dick but this book proved me wrong. Would be nice if a girl was rough with my dick."

At that moment a challenge was presented in front of your eyes. Somehow you felt the urge to be that girl. To be Sukuna's girl, even if it was just for one night and if he never called again. All your logic and reasoning went out the window and you only live once.

Sukuna watched you curiously get inside your head, wondering what you were planning. He exhaled looking down at his phone to see the time.

"Well, it's getting very late Rosy and I'm hungry. Want to order some -"

He was about to get up when you stood up and pushed him back onto his double sofa. What was going on with you as Sukuna watched you get on your knees, his eyes widened.

"Hey! What are you-"

You pressed your hand against Sukuna's mouth, your other hand drawing circles on his knee.

"For the record, this is out of my own volition. Can I …"

You trailed off, almost feeling embarrassed to say what you wanted to do to him. Your bravery was all over the place and Sukuna quirked a curious eyebrow. He couldn't believe this was happening and he didn't even initiate it. He didn't know whether to stop or carry on. Either way he felt like a dick and he was going to be an inconsiderate dick.

Sukuna gently pried your hand off his mouth, holding it and fiddling with your fingers.

"Can you what? Come on say what you were gonna say, Rosy?"

You huff through your nose and bite your lip. Now you definitely weren't going to say it as Sukuna grinned. You were the type of girl to live in fantasies so he truly didn't expect you to follow through as he brought his hand onto your shoulders.

"You know this is very cute but … I'm fine with just reading. Don't strain yourself."

You hated this placating tone, like Sukuna wouldn't believe you and let you do what you wanted and this made your nose scrunch in anger.

"Fine. Can I give you a rough blowjob or are you gonna be a difficult piece of shit?"

"Well shit, Rosy. You didn't have to be such a brat but I appreciate you asking for permission."

Sukuna watched you as he gestured for you to go ahead, his eyes trailed down from your eyes to your nose, mouth and neck. He was gonna let you have your way with him as he watched you unbutton the jeans, unzipping the fly and tugging slightly so that his jeans were off his butt.

You could see the dick more clearly as you noticed it was not only long but quite girthy. It was half erect which offended you as you brought your finger to stroke along the length. Sukuna flinched at your sudden touch, watching your finger stroke him through his boxers and making it rouse to life.

This was your first blow job. Heck, this was the first time you've ever done anything sexual except for masturbating and even that was … You've read books and watched porn. You could do this. Somehow you weren't too fussed about giving your virginity to someone special. You could do this. You didn't care about your first as long as you found someone to be a lifelong last.

Hooking your index finger into his waistband, you tugged it down, almost getting smacked in the face by the sudden growth. Even more, he was circumcised, and trimmed. Sukuna was a shower for sure, looking up at him and connecting your eyes with his.

"Are you waiting for something Rosy?"

"Nah, just wanted to see if you were watching carefully."

Sukuna huffed a laugh, leaning his head back before shuffling down slightly to get his dick to brush your lips.

"Oh, I'm intending to watch everything, Rosy, especially if you're planning to use your teeth. Lemme know if you need help."

You frowned at his words, deciding to just go for it as you leaned forward to purse your lips around his tip, you begin suckling on it, pushing your tongue down to lick up his length. Making your mouth water more so that your saliva drips down as you slowly push more of his dick into your mouth.

His hands clenched the cushions of his sofa, his nose let out short breaths as he watched you slobber over his dick like a dog on a bone. You had no experience for sure but somehow this was so much better than any blowjob he had received. Your inexperience was driving him crazy as he watched your saliva droop down.

For sure you were a messy girl as you took Sukuna's dick out of your mouth, licking up and down before spitting on it and retaking it into your mouth. You bring your teeth down and gently graze against his frenulum which made him yelp. An interesting sound as you repeated your action.

This was way better and somehow his heart pumped faster every time your teeth pinch the length. You could bite down and somehow the potential pain of that made him grow so hard, and before he knew it, he was whining. He's never whined or whimpered. Your teeth teased at his girth, threatening to bite down which almost had him arch his back.

Watching Sukuna react like that made you push harder, licking down to where his balls were. You kissed them before gulping them into your mouth and sucking at them like they were a melon ball. Precum was starting to pool at the slit of his penis which surprised him because it took Sukuna longer to get to an orgasm stage.

There was something different about you as you noticed the white viscose cum on his tip. You licked at it, finally tasting what you've only read about. It wasn't great and it wasn't awful. It was salty and you began to suck his tip again in the hopes to get him to produce more.

"Shit, Rosy. Stop teasing."

Sukuna was at his whims end as he watched you guzzle his dick like it was ice cream. You weren't teasing at all in fact you wanted to try to fit him into your mouth as you sat up straighter and brought your head down. Slowly swallowing his cock to try to deep throat him.

Unfortunately you had a terrible gag reflex that made you pull up immediately, Sukuna jerked in surprise as he watched you pull away, gagging. You were an overachiever which made him grin with glee at your grumpy pout. He patted your cheek to reassure you.

"Hey Rosy, don't be so grumpy. You're doing well."

You mimicked his words and tried again but failed once again as your gag reflex made you pull up. Sukuna exhaled exasperatedly, grabbing both your cheeks to make your attention face him.

"Why are you being a brat? You clearly cannot deepthroat me so don't do that again."

"Or what?"

You were in that kind of mood as Sukuna almost guffawed in laughter. One of his hands slid down to press just below your jawline. A shiver ran down your body as Sukuna leaned in, quoting from the book.

"Or I'll fuck that throat so hard that you lose your voice."

You bit back a smile, the logic of that made no sense and you just found it funny which made Sukuna curiously tilt his head and tighten his grip on your neck.

"That funny?"

"I mean … that is so not possible."

Sukuna pursed back a smile, bowing his head slightly so he could not laugh at your words. You were by far the funniest most interesting lay, he was for sure never going to make this a one time thing as he looked up and into your eyes, trying to maintain that serious tone.

"Oh yeah, wanna bet?"

"Totally."

Sukuna shaked his head and huffed out a laugh, leaning his head back and palming his face. You and your terrible sense of humour got to him.

"Goddamn it Rosy, I'm tryna set a mood here."

You shrugged and were about to return to sucking Sukuna's dick when he shook his head and pulled you up by your shoulders. Standing up and lifting you in his strong arms, pressing his lips onto yours. His tongue licked around your mouth, taking in his own taste.

He blindly guided you to his own room, stepping on top of his own bed to lay you down. There was no more patience in Sukuna as he let go of your lips to fully undress and show his full nude body. This time you noticed that he was covered in tattoos, all over his chest and arms and legs. You were surprised there weren't any on his dick.

"I see you admiring me Rosy."

"Nah, just wondering why your dick ain't tattooed?"

"Just cause I didn't. Now I'mma ask this once: can I be your first?"

You blinked in surprise, how'd he know you were a virgin. There was no way he should have been able to tell that. You clear your throat and unbutton your shirt.

"What kinda question is that? You're not my first."

This was funny to Sukuna as he broke out into a full blown laughter. It took a few minutes for him to settle before he loomed over you making your thighs rest on his hips as his nose brushed against yours.

"Don't try to be funny. It's actually cute that you're a virgin. Don't worry, I'll take care of you."

Sukuna pulls off your shirt and skirt, raising an eyebrow at your fox print bra and underwear. At least you were wearing matching underwear as Sukuna snapped the band of your panties against your waist.

"So this is the new kind of lingerie nowadays. You're just getting cuter by the minute."

You frowned, you weren't cute, you were sexy and you had enough of Sukuna's cockiness as you brought your hands to his shoulders, shoving him to roll onto his back. Bringing your whole body to straddle him and have your pussy press against his cock which made the both of you shiver.

"Think I'm cute now?"

By instinct, your hips began to slowly roll on his cock gradually increasing in speed which made Sukuna huff and whimper, the only thing he could hold onto was your hips. You had your hands on his chest to steady yourself. This was way better than anything you imagined as your head lolled back in pleasure.

Sukuna too was enthralled in the act, there was something about you that was making his cool dominant demeanour just fade away as you began to hump him faster. He brought a thumb down to rub rapid circles on your clit which had you convulse and beg.

"Sukuna! Fuck!"

"Shit!"

You were being brought closer to the edge by Sukuna's thumb as you gyrated your hips faster until you shuddered with pleasure. Finally reaching your high, followed by Sukuna who's cum spread: a little bit on your underwear, his stomach, his chest and his lower jaw.

You were lost in pleasure as your head rolled back and forth, Sukuna was also feeling a little out of breath but he had enough energy for one more round, this time he was going inside. He blindly reached into his bedside drawer to pull out a red bottle of lube. He squirted some onto his hand and fingers, spreading a little more onto his penis.

Sliding your underwear to a side, you let out a broken gasp at the intrusion of Sukuna's lubed fingers inside your vagina. Thrusting them a few times to get you used to the feel before sliding them out and grabbing the base of his penis. In your orgasmic daze you noticed his hand on his penis.

To help him, you shift forward slightly and guide the penis inside you. Full on moaning uncontrollably whilst one of your hands dug and yanked Sukuna's hair.

"Fuck Rosy, gonna be the death of me."

You smiled and gave a nod, finally sitting down onto his dick. He fit snugly inside thanks to the lube as your gushy walls clenched at the feel of his dick inside you. This was way better than any book you've ever read. You were way better than any woman Sukuna fucked.

It felt incredible and warm being inside you, Sukuna was never going to let you go. However something seemed to snap in your head as you squealed and pulled yourself out, hopping off the bed and going through the drawers before tossing a foil packet on Sukuna's chest.

"Fuck, you forgot protection."

Sukuna huffed with a smirk, ripping open the foil and rolling the condom on himself.

"Shut up!"

"Virgin. Totally called it."

You got back on the bed, this time sliding onto Sukuna's dick again, your insides clenched and relaxed at the feel of him inside you. A hiss left his lips, planting his feet on the bed and making you bounce up and down as if you were on those bouncy balls.

Your nails dug into Sukuna's shoulders as you couldn't control your movements, feeling like a toy. No wonder the female protagonists in the books you read were pushed to their limits in sex because sex itself was tiring. Sukuna had his eyes closed and teeth gritted whilst sweat was sticking like water droplets on his skin.

Once again feeling a little offended, you brought your right hand onto his neck, squeezing as hard as you could to get his attention.

"Hey! Sukuna! Keep your eyes open! Thought you were gonna watch everything."

He opened his eyes which made you notice that he had dark brown eyes like the bark of trees in a forest. It was the warmest kindest thing you saw from him as you watched Sukuna take your fingers to scoop some of the cum that was about to dry on his skin, moving your fingers into his mouth and sucking off his own taste.

"Don't worry, I'm not missing anything."

A few more thrusts and you were close to cumming which disappointed you. For some unknown deep embedded reason, you wanted Sukuna to cum first, to tire out first. Just anything to get rid of that placating confidence. You needed to delay your orgasm and the best way to do that was to completely move away.

Immediately you got off Sukuna, huffing and puffing rather tiredly which made Sukuna groan in disappointment. He couldn't believe that you pulled yourself off again, as he turned his face to watch you only, for you to climb back on him, slide him in and go again.

Sukuna tilted his head in confusion, unsure of what you're playing at. Although he could feel himself getting close to the edge, he was about to move his hand down to squeeze at the base of his penis to delay his orgasm but you grabbed his wrist and pressed it down beside his head. You did the same to his other hand. 

Thrusting harder and uncontrollably, Sukuna was getting very close to spilling as he hissed through his teeth.

"Fuck Rosy! Stop! I'm gonna-"

"Go 'head. I want ya to."

This was what you were playing at as Sukuna knowingly grinned. Instead he dug deep into himself to mentally block himself from coming but the sound of your words snapped him out.

"Oh Sukuna! Fuck! You feel so good!"

You were playing dirty. Talking loudly, holding his hands down and bouncing on him. Truthfully, he could overpower you, and really fuck you hard. However you were the one who initiated the sex, so you were the one in control. Sukuna was fine with that and next time he could get the upper hand and really mess you up. 

You could have this one as Sukuna exhaled deeply, ejaculating into the condom. He came harder than before and somehow he felt a little more exhausted. He looked down to where you were joined, watching his penis disappear into you and it wasn't long until you reached your high. Your vagina got wetter and started dripping down his condom.

Your arms and legs started to burn slightly as you dropped yourself onto Sukuna's chest making him huff in pain at your sudden drop. His eyes furrowed in confusion, tapping your shoulder and calling your name to see if you were still awake. You hummed slightly which made Sukuna exhale in relief.

"Hey, wake up. Gotta dispose the condom."

You frowned rather tiredly but rolled yourself off him and beside him. Taking deep breaths to cool down your skin, looking to your left to see Sukuna take off the condom and tie the end with a knot. His legs felt like they were glued to his sheets, he broke out in a smile and wiped his forehead. There was a small bucket which he used as a bin, he tossed the condom as it landed inside.

Sukuna glanced back at you, seeing you take deep heavy breaths. You were tired out like him.

"How was that for your first night?"

"That wasn't my-" You cut off at the look on Sukuna's face. There was no point lying. "It was … good. You?"

Sukuna laughed heartily, heart warm from you asking him how it was.

"I mean, I cannot feel my legs so … it was really really good, Rosy."

Your heart swelled from the praise as you bit your bottom lip and looked away which made Sukuna grin because you were shying away again. He brought his hands onto your waist to make you lie on top of him, stretching his hand out to pull the sheet over both of your waists.

"Why'd you call me Rosy?"

"Aw don't look away Rosy."

Sukuna shrugged, his fingers coming up to stroke at your cheeks.

"Cause I like how flustered you were when I called for your attention for the first time."

That was clever of him and flattering as you gave a nod. Sukuna grinned, bringing your chin up to give you a peck on the lips.

"So same thing for tomorrow's book club?"

You raised an eyebrow, bringing your finger to trace at Sukuna's lips.

"I never agreed."

"Come on Rosy. We need to read a book that's not so … lackluster as you so put it."

There was something about Sukuna that just made you roll your eyes but agree as you give a short nod.

"Okay fine. But we are strictly reading."

"Says the one who initiated this."

"I did not-"

"Really? I told you I was just fine reading but you said it yourself: 'I'm doing this out of my own volition.'"

You laugh breathlessly, agreeing and not contesting his words.

"Okay fine. But we are not recreating book scenes if we do end up having sex."

"Ugh, stop acting like a virgin now."

You smack Sukuna on his shoulder which makes him squeeze your thighs, staring down into your eyes whilst raising his eyebrows. You technically hadn't recreated a sex scene as Sukuna informs you.

"Well if you wanna get technical: we only recreated an oral technique. We've still yet to recreate a sex scene. Did I tell you that I have an office for my company? We can do the office scene there."

"We're gonna have sex, again?"

"I mean …it's only a suggestion."

It sounded like a challenge again as you pierce your eyes together. Somehow you manage to gain some strength in your body as you push yourself to sit up on his thighs.

"Why wait for your office when we can just go ahead and recreate the bedroom scene? This time following - it - exactly."

He liked where you were going with this as he nudged your body to shuffle forward slightly.

"Sure, why not? But you're gonna have to scoot up and take a seat on my face because I still can't feel my legs."

[robin-the-enby]

Hello!! Could I request some sweeney todd x reader heavy fluff please? thanks!

Marked by an angel

Pairing: Sweeney Todd x gn!reader

Smmary: A chance meeting of two strange people on Fleet street. What started just as part of your job lead you to finding a new friend and perhaps...a lover.

Warnings: hints of murder (it's Sweeney, c'mon), unfair boss/employee dynamic, description of getting robbed and bruises (1 blackeye)

A/N: After what felt like an eternity, I am back! I am so glad I finished this. I was dealing with mental issues, financial struggles, work and uni so I had no time and time or energy to do anything. But I am very happy to post this! Maybe it's not as fluffy as you wanted and for that I am sorry, but I feel like it is as true to the character as possible :) I'll gladly hear your feedback on this piece and all likes, but especially reblogs and comments are greatly appreciated! Also, if you'd like to hear some bonus stuff about this oneshot, feel free to shoot me a message!

There are many men in the world. And yet you can't say you've ever met anyone the likes of Mr. Todd.

The quiet barber from Fleet street. With his pale complexion, white streaked hair and dark eyes that held the depths of the ocean that surrounds Britain. He had captured your attention the very first time you made an appointment with him for your boss. The recommendations for his shop floated around your part of town and all the gentlemen could not seem to praise his skills enough.

Your boss had ordered you to find him a new barber, since his old one was ripping him off on money. Not that you blamed the poor bloke, times were tough, prices high and it wasn't like your boss couldn't spare a few pounds, especially since he liked to have his hair and beard trimmed once a month. Luckily, you managed to talk him out of getting the authorities involved, knowing that if the man was to be jailed, it would take a massive toll on his family.

Your job as an errand person, a sort of secretary, was simple enough in theory. You followed your boss around, a businessman dealing in produce from a few farms that he owned in the countryside. All you had to do was carry a notepad and a pencil with you to scribble down tasks that had to be managed and appointments that had to be made or dealt with. But in reality your legs were probably stronger than most people's, with how many steps you walked every day. Even though it wasn't in your job description, you did everything your boss didn't want to, went everywhere he wasn't exactly needed. You swore that the lazy bastard would have you walking to the latrine instead of him, if it were possible.

That was one of the reasons you liked the visits to the barber's, because you got to just sit on a chair by the window for an hour at least, quietly listening to the conversation made between your boss and the man grooming him, only occasionally having to scribble down one thing or another. But ever since your boss started to frequent Mr. Todd's shop, the rest wasn't the only reason accompanying your boss there was enjoyable or you.

Mr. Todd was an enigma. Mostly silent during work and outside of it, you learnt to appreciate the sound of his voice and to study his body language, little quirks that gave off pieces of his personality. The way his eyes flitted around, scanning the face of his customer for any imperfections that needed to be dealt with. His hands were steady, working seemingly without relying on his eyes or even brain, with a level of discipline you haven't seen before in your life. And from time to time, his eyes would flick up to meet yours, for a fraction of a second, before falling back down to your boss, lounging on Mr. Todd's intricate chair. You wondered why it had to be so intricate, compared to other barbers you've seen in your career, but you didn't question it, just as you never questioned the way the man's eyes would inevitably get stuck on your boss' neck every once in a while for some reason that had yet to reveal itself to you.

Maybe it was morbid curiosity or some other strange pull that made you want to find out just what was the cause of the deep emotion swirling behind Sweeney's eyes. The kind of pull that made sure the mysterious barber did not leave your mind for longer than a few hours. So you started to come around to the meat pie shop right under Mr. Todd's. The shop owner, Mrs. Lovett, was a sweet and terribly lonely woman, whose meat pies were, also, quickly gaining popularity around its part of town, and it didn't take long for her to take a shine to you as soon as she recognised you as one of her regulars.

While making a new friend wasn't your primary goal when you started hanging around the pie shop, you didn't mind how Mrs. Lovett warmed up to you. She was a sweet and funny woman, in her own way, and you soon recognised she was also dealing with romantic feelings towards Mr. Todd, as she confided in you one day. These feelings were unreciprocated, as far as you knew, although Sweeney visited the shop every night, coming down to fetch his dinner, for free of course. He usually came around after closing his own shop, sometimes even later, when even Mrs. Lovett closed down for the night. He would walk past you two sharing a glass of wine and exchanged a quiet and smooth, although cold 'good evening', before taking a pie and disappearing upstairs again.

But the longer you kept visiting Mrs. Lovett, the more Sweeney started to notice you. Once in a blue moon he would share a glass of wine with you both as you would more or less listen to Minnie ramble about this and that. After some time, one night, when Sweeney was upstairs and you were spending an evening at the pie shop, Mrs. Lovett told you cheekily that Mr. Todd asked about you, how you and her met and why you were around so much. Despite her mischievous smile you felt as if he was wary of your presence here, which puzzled you, but it did not deter you from wanting to get to know the man more.

In the end, it was him who made the first move, and you didn't even realise until much later. One time, when you were accompanying your boss for his monthly trim, Sweeney suggested that he should come around more often, at least every two weeks, because it would do wonders for his hair and beard health. It was evident your boss had no idea whether that was true or not, so he looked at you for confirmation. You shared a look with the barber, through which you tried to communicate to him that if he was planning to swindle your boss, it would be on your head, but something in those dark eyes of his made you trust him, so you confirmed to your boss that yes, coming to the barber more often would not only be beneficial to his hair, but it would also be good for appearances.

From that point on you got closer with the barber much faster than you could even register. One night, as you were sitting at the table in the pie shop across Minnie, nursing your second glass of wine and venting out frustration from your job, Sweeney came down to get his dinner. Before he left though, he stopped in the door to the kitchen, where the pies were made, and stared at you for a while, gaze calculating, but not as cold as you were used to. With the alcohol flowing through your veins you called him out on it, to which he simply replied "Your hair. It would do good with a trimming." before turning around on his heel and walking out. Mrs. Lovett cursed his lack of etiquette and assured you that you looked fine, although getting a trim wouldn't be a bad idea. She knew that given what your job was, you didn't have much time left to treat yourself.

The next time you accompanied your boss to his barber appointment yet again, Sweeney brought up the subject as your boss left you to pay. "Have you thought about my offer?" You blinked up at him, not knowing for a second what he meant, before his eyes shifted to your hair and you understood what he was implying. Feeling the heat rising to your cheeks, you tried to keep your cool as you asked, just to be sure "You meant that you would trim my hair?" You didn't want your voice to come out as unsure and surprised as it did, but if Sweeney noticed it, and something told you he did, the barber didn't mention it or let it show. He only smirked the slightest bit, making you wonder later if you didn't just imagine it, and replied "Well, at this point I would be offended if the first person you tasked with such a job wasn't me. Or do you deem my skills inadequate?" he raised his brow as he jokingly asked, knowing well what your answer would be. Feeling as hot as a boiled potato, you quickly settled the date of your appointment before you were out the door, so that your boss wouldn't scold you for dilly dallying.

When the day of your appointment came, you felt strangely nervous, your legs slightly shaking as you walked up the stairs to Sweeney's dark shop. For some reason, you couldn't shake the feeling of cattle being herded to a butcher. You chalked it up to your crush making you nervous, but that feeling only intensified when Sweeney positioned the barber chair you had sat on, so that you were half laying down. And yet when he tended to your locks, his touch was soft, quick and precise, never wandering where it didn't need to and leaving as soon as he was done in one area, moving swiftly to another. What came as a surprise to you was that he made small talk with you the entire time you were in that chair. Maybe it was because he sensed your nerves, but maybe not, you really couldn't tell. He asked you where you came from, why were you in London of all places, he even asked about your job and your family. The last topic he brushed upon quickly, which made you suspect it was a tough subject for him, an information you filed away safely in your brain to mull over later.

The last thing he told you when you were done and admiring yourself in the mirror he provided was to not tell Mrs. Lovett who cut your hair. You nodded softly and made your way home, feeling like a brand new person. Although the next time you set foot in the pie shop, Minnie's first question was "Did Mr. Todd cut your hair? It looks wonderful, darling!" You didn't confirm nor deny her rhetoric question, only smiling a bit bashfully before Mrs. Lovett insisted on opening 'the good wine' for the occasion. You didn't mention the fact that he refused to take payment for the service...

And as if that wasn't enough embarrassment in the short amount of time, this night at Minnie's pie shop turned out to have gone on much longer than any other one. Mrs. Lovett insisted you stay a bit longer any time you brought up going home for the night. Her reasoning being that since you finally did something for yourself after what must've been quite a long time in her opinion, you deserved to treat yourself some more, because when would an opportunity like this arise again?

And so you stayed seated in the dimly lit pie shop that smelled of baked meat, the likes of which you have never smelled before, and a mixture of herbs that reminded you of a memory long buried in your mind.

The conversation flowed freely and as the alcohol made its rounds through your bloodstream, your tongue became looser, as well as did Minnie's. She told you how her attempts at wooing Mr. Todd were progressing, or rather, were stagnating, with the man ignoring any and every romantic gesture or hint made towards him by his friend. That brought you to joining her in her admiring words for the handsome barber, leading to many laughs and jokes. Maybe it was because of her tipsy state, but you were surprised Mrs. Lovett took your admission of your crush on her upstairs neighbour better than you expected.

Your conversation then moved elsewhere and you were both so engrossed in it that neither of you heard the quiet footsteps leading to the shop. Sweeney's brows rose a little as he opened the door to a peculiar sight. The two people he had allowed closer to himself than anyone else since his return to London were sitting huddled at a table, which wouldn't have been that unusual, if it wasn't for the nearly empty bottle of old and undoubtedly strong wine. Both of your glasses were somewhat filled, the precious liquid spilled here and there in small amounts on the table. If Sweeney wasn't such a gentleman, despite his cold and often ruthless heart, he would say you were drunk. And not just a little bit.

Announcing his presence with a gruff cough, both your and Mrs. Lovett's heads snapped around to face him and he fought the small smirk that grew on his face at the sight. "Mr. Todd! We haven't even noticed you were here!" Minnie quickly addressed him with her signature friendliness. You stayed silent, instead opting to just admire the way Mr. Todd looked in the dim lighting in the shop. You felt you were seeing him completely differently than the other nights you spent there. His eyes reflected the light, making them look even more mysterious and alluring than usual and his normally pale face seemed more livelier. You would have spoken up, offered him some wine, but suddenly, being brought out so suddenly from your conversation with Minnie, your tongue felt big in your mouth, the weight of lead and you just did not have the energy to move it. Or open your mouth for that matter. Somewhere in the back of your mind crossed a thought that maybe you have had a bit too much to drink.

"It is quite late, I am surprised to catch you awake." Mr. Todd pointed out in a neutral tone, despite the playful mirth he was feeling. "Oh but the same could be said about you, Mr. Todd." Mrs. Lovett retaliated cheekily "Besides, we have a good reason to drink into the night! It is my friend's birthday, after all." she announced with an air of pride. You blinked at her a few times, not knowing where she had gotten that information from, because you were pretty sure today was not your birthday at all. Perhaps Minnie has forgotten the reason you were celebrating altogether and her drunken mind just made up a reason on the spot. As you were pondering when actually was your birthday, Mr. Todd spoke up again "Is that so? Well in that case-" and in a few strides he was at yours and Mrs. Lovett's table. He grabbed her half full glass of wine and before you could start wondering if it wasn't half empty, he raised it, grabbing your hand. "Happy birthday." he smiled slightly while you stood up, because you were being congratulated and you didn't want to appear rude, even though there wasn't actually a reason to congratulate you. Mr. Todd downed his, previously Minnie's, glass in one gulp before setting it down again.

Turning to Mrs. Lovett, he addressed her "I need to discuss something with you." he then turned his attention towards you "But it seems there is a more pressing matter at hand." he smirked as he gave you a once over. You felt your cheeks flush, knowing he was right. Standing up was the last straw before your alcohol fueled downfall. You were barely standing, your body swaying side to side slightly to keep itself balanced. Mrs. Lovett studied you for a while as well, before standing, with only a slightly lesser difficulty than you. "Oh I'm so sorry, dear, it seems that I have gone overboard with the drinks." she apologised and you couldn't help but smile softly at her sad tone. "'S alright, Minnie. 'M not mad." you shook your head with a small smile "I best be off though..." mumbling to yourself, you bid your friend a goodnight, not really paying attention to Sweeney, assuming he was waiting for you to leave so that he could discuss whatever it was with his neighbour.

Stumbling away from the table, you were surprised when a hand gripped your upper arm, supporting your weight and grounding your otherwise spinning world. Tracing the arm the hand was attached to with your eyes, you found Sweeney's already looking at your face. You said nothing, in the case that he only supported you in your struggle to weave through the tables in the shop, but as he continued to lead you out of the old building, Mrs. Lovett having gone in the back already, you were confused by this act of chivalry. Not that you took Mr. Todd for a brute, you just didn't expect such a gesture aimed at...yourself. The fact that this was also the first time he has touched you in any way while not necessarily needing so, unlike when he gave you your haircut, did not help your inebriated mind from running wild with conspiracies.

The crisp night air helped clear your head a little bit and you gulped it greedily with deep breaths when you walked out, arm in hand, with the barber. He stood, patiently, right next to you, his secure, but not tight grip on your arm never faltering. If he noticed how you took your sweet time collecting yourself, he didn't mention it, his eyes instead trained on the silver moon hanging in the sky like a lamp, blurred slightly by the infamous London fog. When he sensed you move more into the street, however, he tugged you back towards him slightly, as if he could not let you stray far.

"Where are you going?" he asked, his tone devoid of emotion and yet his eyes shone in a particular way that you couldn't exactly put a finger on in your state. The smirk that once rested on his handsome face was gone and you were perhaps more confused than before. "Home?" you half answered, half asked, unsure of what was the problem. Mr. Todd shook his head sternly "I cannot send you home alone at this time of day and retain a sound mind." he said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. You couldn't help but laugh at his statement. Where were you supposed to sleep then? Inside the shop? Sliding your arm out of his grip, you grabbed your stomach, your laughter gaining in volume, making you double over. "Oh, you're funny, Mr. Todd!" you wheezed, not caring the man you were addressing was looking at your drunken self with a completely neutral expression, not understanding in the slightest what was so funny "I have to go home! Where else would you have me spend the night?" you asked when you caught your breath, your laughter simmering down into tired giggles. Drunk laughing was hard, but really fun at the same time, you thought.

Sweeney reached out to take your arm again, turning you around to face the stairs like a puppet and started leading you to his home. "You can spend the night upstairs. If I sent you home, alone, you're sure to get robbed...or worse." his voice was cold and harsh and yet you had the sense this sudden change of tone was not due to anything you said. Not taking any chances, just in case, you kept your mouth shut and let him lead you up the stairs while you could feel your face heat up. It felt awfully wrong to just...invade his space like that. If there's one thing you learned about Sweeney, and let's be honest, there weren't many to choose from, it was that he was a very private person. At the same time, he invited you here. If he didn't want you in his space, he could've just let you stay downstairs with Minnie, she would take good enough care of you without a doubt. But what did all this mean?

You said nothing else as you let the barber move you along, much like a puppet, while trying to focus on every confusing thought and feeling that ran through your head. But your energy was quickly dwindling and you couldn't help but to succumb to sleep as soon as our head hit the pillow.

Regaining consciousness again was...unpleasant, to say the least. The first thing you registered was rain. Not very unusual for London though. The next thing was a piercing headache, that threatened to split your skull in two. Groaning, you flipped over in bed. That's when you noticed the smell. This didn't smell like your sheets... Slowly, but surely, the events of the previous night came back to you, even the less than appropriate ending of it. Blinking open your eyes, you let yourself get adjusted to the lighting of the room, before taking a look around. You were, in fact, in Mr. Todd's small abode and you were very probably in his bed too. You could feel heat creeping up your neck as you registered the all too familiar objects of the barber shop, now from a brand new perspective. There was the barber chair, as ominous as ever, the normal chair to the side, where you usually sat, now occupied by the master of the house.

Polishing and sharpening his blades, Sweeney sat by the window, seemingly uninterested and unbothered by basically a stranger waking up in his bed. His unwavering focus was only on his blades, a focus so intense it would send shivers down your spine, if you weren't so engrossed in your own embarrassment. Only when you began to sit up, your arms threatening to give out underneath you, did the barber tear his gaze away from his tools. You tried to get up to your feet as quickly as you could, manners all but forgotten, your only desire was to get out and never return to Mr. Todd's barber shop or Mrs. Lovett's meat pie establishment ever again. But your knees were wobbly and you felt in your body like a newborn fawn, so your quick escape proved to be harder than you thought.

Sweeney looked at you inquisitively and it seemed like he wanted to say something, but you beat him to it, the thought of anything he could and probably would have said making bile rise in your throat. Fighting the nausea, you pushed yourself off the bed and lightly stumbled before standing in front of the barber. "I am so sorry for what transpired yesterday, Mr. Todd." you apologised first and foremost after clearing your throat "You should not have had to witness any of that." looking awkwardly to the side, you continued "However I am very grateful for everything you have done for me yesterday." And with those last words, you bee lined it for the door, only briefly noticing the 'closed' sign on the door that should have been turned around probably hours ago. It wasn't until you were in the middle of the journey home that you realised you didn't even know what time it was, nor did you at least have the decency to make up the bed after you have slept in it. Which brought forth a question...Where did Mr. Todd sleep? There didn't seem to be another sleeping area nor any kind of furniture suitable for such activity in his living/working quarters. You weren't sure what made you blush more, the possibility that you shared a bed or the possibility that he stayed awake somewhere in the same space as you were the whole night. Both seemed strangely...intimate.

For the next few weeks, you avoided Fleet street like the plague. Luckily for you, your boss wasn't in need of a trim anytime soon, even though you did convince him to visit the barber's more than he did previously. But whenever you thought about the mysterious gentleman residing above the pie shop, hot embarrassment flowed through your body like lightning. And so you didn't remind your boss to upkeep his appearance and as usual, the big oaf wouldn't think of such thing himself. He had money, so what if he looked a bit disheveled? Everybody was saving up on everything they could, the rich and poor alike.

Mrs. Lovett was especially vocal about your absence. She worried that she really did offend you or did you wrong somehow during that a bit too wild night. Whenever Sweeney would appear in the shop to fetch his meal, she would bombard him with questions, if he had any news of you, your whereabouts, your wellbeing, or whether your boss' appointment was coming up anytime soon. She regretted now never asking for your address, with how much she'd come to like you in the time you've spent together. You brought a normalcy to her life that she's dreamed of oh so much.

And while Sweeney wasn't pretty much vocal at all towards your sudden absence, when he closed down for the day and looked out of his window, overlooking the grey London sky and dark and gloomy rooftops, he wondered where you could possibly be. What were you doing? Were you alright?

You had came into the vengeful barber's life unexpectedly and while at first Minnie's obsession with you irritated him, making his goals, his work, that much more dangerous, he couldn't help but notice your good nature. Not only towards his neighbour, even though with how strange the woman could be it was surprising in itself, but towards him, even towards your boss. It wasn't that you were naive, no, he could see in your eyes that you knew exactly how cruel and unjust this world was, and yet you still chose to be kind. Despite all the hardships he knew you were dealt by destiny, no, by other people, the biggest monsters on this earth, you still remained with your heart open to others. And he admired that. Your presence on Fleet street was like a beacon of clean light in the constant grey fog, when he sometimes glanced at the street below him and you happened to be there, he always recognized you, as if you shone more brightly than others.

The lonely man spent many a night pondering on what was it that made you occupy his mind so much, what made you so special. He still loved his wife, and his daughter, wherever she may be, that much he knew. But sometimes...sometimes when he looked at you, your face, as you were laughing with Mrs. Lovett about this or that, he could see her smile. And it was so reassuring, as if Lucy herself was sending her mark upon you, signaling to him that you were someone he needed to protect. And when he came to terms with this revelation, he swore to himself that that was exactly what he was going to do.

So of course it was no problem for him to let you spend a night in his bed. He found your drunken antics and your embarrassment the next morning quite endearing. If you would've paid more attention to him and your surroundings that morning, you would've noticed the small smirk on his face as he watched you clumsily apologize, even though he saw no reason for it. And you would've noticed the two cups of coffee, along with some painkillers standing prepared on the table near the bed. But Sweeney didn't think his actions would've driven you away from him and Mrs. Lovett like that. He knew there was nothing that he could do except wait for you to come back, although he didn't like the idea of something happening to you without him knowing it, being able to prevent it. And he didn't even want to think about the scenario that you would never be back. He saw the way you looked at him, studied him, the confusion in your eyes from the way he behaved so often and now he wanted nothing more than to tell you everything and sort things out. Even if he wasn't sure how exactly to do that. Benjamin was good with words, but Sweeney? Sweeney was all about action, because unlike Benjamin, Sweeney Todd knew just how little weight words could hold in the world.

It didn't take long for you to start missing Fleet street, with your two favourite residents, Mrs. Lovett and Mr. Todd. You contemplated when should you pay them a visit and how you would explain your avoidance of them, until after one night, when that became irrelevant.

It happened in the evening. You were let go from work for the day and while you were on your way home, thinking mostly about whether you had any leftovers from yesterday or if you had to cook dinner from scratch and not paying much attention to your surroundings, when you were jumped. Two men, none of which you knew, cornered you against a wall of a building along which you were walking, asking for some money. You, not wanting any more trouble than necessary, pulled out your pouch, where you kept all the change you needed, but it wasn't enough for whatever they were planning. With two figures towering at least a good head above from you, demanding you do what they say, you didn't dare look them directly in their faces, so you knew little of what they looked like. But they smelled awful and faintly of fish. When they asked to show them what more you had in your bag, yo asked them to leave you be, that you've already given them everything important you had on you. That proved to be a mistake, since one of them grabbed you roughly by the arms from behind, while the other ripped your bag from your hands and turned it upside down. You struggled to get away from the bastard's bruising grip and started calling out for help, which was another mistake. The guy that was going through your things, most of which were only daily necessities, such as your keys and whatnot, suddenly sprung up and hit you in the face, gruffly telling you to shut up, if you valued your life. It was at that point you noticed his voice was slightly slurred.

Luckily, an officer must've been patrolling nearby, or someone must've taken pity on you and called him over, it wasn't that late in the evening after all, because as soon as you heard the distinct sound of a bobby whistle, the first guy let you go while the second one hastily grabbed your notebook and both of them booked it down the street, weaving through the city's intricate alleyways. The officer quickly asked what happened and told you to stay put while he chased after them. But it wasn't even five minutes before he was back, informing you that he lost them and he asked you to accompany him to the police station to give a statement on what happened and they would see what could be done.

The next day, you showed up to work with a nasty looking black eye, without your notebook or a single penny. The police officers told you that with the limited description you provided they weren't sure how much could be done. After telling your boss what happened, he surprisingly took the matter quite seriously. Not only did you write down ever single appointment he needed to attend to in your notebook, but some quite serious and important information, codes to safes, finance tracking, different information having to do with sales and so on. He asked what police station you went to yesterday and said he would get in touch with the officers, since it wasn't impossible that the attack wasn't planned ahead and the notebook was exactly what someone was after. You didn't need or want to know anything more than that. Your boss also gave you two weeks off, to let your eye heal, commenting how it would seem weird if you accompanied him looking like that and he didn't need any more rumors being spread about him, like physically abusing his personnel. He gave you your money back, saying it was going from your next paycheck until the police got your original money back, plus some more to buy a new notebook. As incompetent as he could sometimes be, he was still a businessman, and even though his motivation for these choices was questionable, you were still glad he made them.

As soon as you were outside again, your legs immediately took you in the direction of Fleet street. Still quite shaken up after the incident, the thing you needed the most at that moment was a friend and something told you Minnie would not turn you down.

And you were not mistaken. As you took a step inside the pie shop, Mrs. Lovett's arms were around you, her worried and apologetic rambling reaching your ears as soon as they got used to the buzz of the busy establishment. As soon as the woman pulled away from you, her relieved expression turned to one of shock as she carefully cradled your cheek where the bruise was, asking "What in god's name happened?" Immediately she brought you to the back of the shop and fetched the cleanest rag, which was then promptly soaked in cold water, so that you could relieve some of the ache of the black eye. And she had you remain there until closing, spending her time between serving customers and preparing pies chatting with you. She informed you that she wasn't mad about your sudden disappearance, that she was just very worried and then she promptly asked you your address "In case you want to pull something on me like that again." she reasoned with a cheeky smile.

After Minnie closed down in the evening, you both could sit uninterrupted in the main area, with the businesswoman cleaning up here and there and re-wetting your rag. Anytime you tried to offer her help as a thank you, she would just sternly order you to sit back down and not even think about work, since you've been given 'a sick leave'. Just as she was done with cleaning and was about to head out to get rid of the dirty water, a person you were still dreading to meet walked into the room. You immediately knew who it was by the way Mrs. Lovett's eyes brightened, her face blooming into one of sweet happiness as she cooed out a greeting "Oh, Mr. Todd! Look who decided to join us today! Poor thing got mugged yesterday, can you believe it?" she shook her head, carrying her bucket out the door "So nice of you to join us, there are some pies hidden in the oven in the back for you!" she called behind her as the door clicked close after her.

There was nothing for you to do but turn around, your face heating up again, only praying Mr. Todd wouldn't pay attention to it. But to your slight surprise, he only stared intently at the black eye adorning your face, like a joke of a monocle the more posh men liked to wear when out and about. With a few quick strides, the barber was next to you, his hand under your chin, tipping your head upwards, so he could assess your wound better under the light. His face was contorted into a frown, but his eyes were nothing but gentle as he murmured "Who did this to you?" His voice was ice cold, but somehow you knew you didn't need to be scared. "I don't know." you whispered "The police are after them now." You both said nothing as you only continued to study each other.

When the sound of a door being opened could be heard, Sweeney gently let go of your chin and took a step back from you, but not quite leaving your side. Mrs. Lovett trotted happily back into the room, taking the seat across from you and looking up at her neighbour, she patted the chair beside hers. Not waiting for him to comply, which was good, because Sweeney did not move an inch from where he stood, she asked you, her expression concerned "Darling, do you think it'll be okay for you to walk home alone at this hour?"

Looking out of the window, you saw the street was getting dark. It would not take much more time for night to completely settle over the city. You felt so safe and comfortable, that you completely forgot about the passage of time. Surely there will be little to no people out at this hour. And those who will be outside roaming the streets are definitely not the kind of people you want to associate yourself with. And while you had no problem walking on the bring of darkness alone before, after yesterday's events, you couldn't help the cold shiver that ran down your back at the thought of the many alleyways you'd have to pass before getting home.

Seeing your hesitance, Mrs. Lovett placed her hand softly on yours "It's alright, love. You can stay here for the night! I'm sure there's plenty of room for one more person in the house." her smile was so reassuring, you couldn't help your own taking over your face. But you shook your head "As much as I appreciate your offer, I have to go home. The officers might need me for more questionings, it's best I don't stay out of the house too long." you explained with a small smile and got up from your chair. Surprisingly, it was Sweeney who spoke next "I'll walk you home. If you wouldn't mind, that is." he offered, his eyes flickering between your face and the table during the latter part. "Oh, Mr. Todd! Such a gentleman!" Minnie squealed adoringly, standing up as well "Trust me, love, with Mr. Todd, you're in good hands." something about the way she looked at the barber when she said that made you feel strange, but you had no reason not to believe her or the quiet man standing beside you. So you nodded and looked towards the window again "Best we head off though, I wouldn't want you to have to return when it's completely dark." you muttered, more to yourself and then looked at your companion for confirmation. The dangerous glint you caught flashing through his eyes made you shiver again, but you ignored it.

After hugging Mrs. Lovett goodbye, you were on your way. The first few minutes passed in complete silence, you had no idea what to say and Mr. Todd wasn't one for many words. Sighing, you decide to be the one to break the ice "I...I'm sorry, once again, Mr. Todd. For running out on you like that. You've done so much for me and I repaid you horribly." your gaze was set on the stone path as you apologised. For a while, the barber said nothing, which did not help your nerves at all. "Sweeney." That was the only thing he said. You whipped your head around to look at him, your mouth hanging agape in confusion. "I'm sorry?" Sweeney then looked at you, a single chuckle escaping his chest through his smirking lips. In the dim night lights of the London street, he looked possibly more attractive than ever before. "My name. I feel like we don't have to keep up such formalities, since you've spent a night in my bed already."

You couldn't look him in the eyes anymore, your face heating up. "You make it sound like something much more serious." you pouted. He chuckled again. This was the most you've heard him talk or just express himself in any way since you've known him. "And it wasn't? I don't let just anyone into my bed, you know." It was clear as day he was enjoying this. But his words held an underlying meaning, one which was much more deeper than the lighthearted teasing. Sweeney slowed into a stop and you followed suit beside him. The last street lamp was now behind him, leaving his face covered mostly in shadows. And yet you could see his eyes, vulnerable in a way he probably hasn't been in a long, long time, you could feel his intense gaze on your face, studying your every small reaction. "What are you saying?" you breathed out, your heart in your throat. Sweeney took a step closer "What I'm saying is that you've grown to be quite important to me. After that night..." he stopped, searching for the right words to continue "I realised many things. And I've realised...that I want to keep you close. To protect you. To know you and to allow myself to be known by you. If you'll let me, that is." and he slowly reached for your hand, holding it in both of his oh so gently. "Do you deem me worthy of knowing your heart? Your soul?"

You could feel your breath hitch in your throat as you were overwhelmed by sudden conflicting emotions. But the one that stood out from all of them was... "As long as you'll deem me worthy of knowing yours." you replied in almost a whisper. And with those words, that one sentence, it was as if the tension in the air disappeared all at once. Sweeney stood beside you once more, this time offering you his arm to take and after you've linked your arm through his, he continued to escort you home. Not just as an acquaintance, not as a friend...but perhaps not yet as a lover. But there was time for all of that. Right now, there was the chilly London night air, you and him. And you could figure out the details, such as breaking the news to Minnie, or discovering why exactly there was a trapdoor behind the barber chair, some other time. Tonight was just for you.

[cacodaemonia]

🍡 and 🍙 for the ask game?

🍡 Which of your fics was the most emotionally difficult to write?

Huh, that's a tough one. While a lot of what I write is of course based on my own experiences in one way or another, the things happening in the fics are still happening to the characters and not me, so I don't find them difficult to write about in that way. I guess the closest I might have come to that was writing about Echo gaining weight (after being rescued on Skako Minor) in Cartography. I tried not to touch on that much in the fic or go into his food or weight gain in any detail.

But if anything, I'd say that the most emotionally difficult fics I've written have simply been the ones that fought me all the way because I kept getting stuck on technical things—like what scene should come after this one, or what do I do with this character while these two are interacting, etc.—or because I just didn't like how I ended the fic. And there are quite a lot of those, including Cartography, A Ballast in the Rip, most of the drabbles I've written, and Good Morning, Goodnight - just to name a few 😂

🍙 Is there a fic you wish had gotten more attention?

Hm, I can't really think of any fics where I was specifically disappointed, but I was bummed out to get relatively few comments on an animation I made that was inspired by @lizardberries's amazing 'Force-sensitive Waxer and Boil' fic, Far Into the Night. It's the only animation I've ever made, but I worked on it for days, and I think it's actually pretty decent for a first try.

Thanks for the ask!!

If you want to reblog the asks, they're here.

[draguta]

.fairytale of new york | ten.

pairing: professor!bucky x fem!reader

summary: a semester in new york. a handsome man in a bar. whiskey neat. to the lighthouse. christmas lights. this is the tale of a whirlwind romance. a forbidden fairytale. college au.

chapter word count: 2295

warnings: age gap (reader 19, bucky 34), student/teacher relationship

a/n: here it is guys, the final chapter of fairytale of new york! an epilogue will be out in two days, so make sure you keep an eye out for that!

🍃 series masterlist 🍃

please remember to reblog, like, and share a comment if you enjoy it - it's always appreciated by writers to see their hard work valued.

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🍃 join my taglist 🍃

Y/N

The drive home to Elmdale was long, much too long. The traffic heading out of the city was relentless, drawing the drive out even longer, meaning that you simply had more time in your own head, more time to ponder over what had happened, and mourn the loss of Bucky.

Yelena, who had taken Bucky's place on your trip, tried to keep you entertained during the drive, having chosen to take the wheel so that you could relax, singing off-key to every song that came on shuffle and regaling you with stories of her party antics, but it didn't work, as much as you wished it would. Your mind kept wandering to Bucky, to the girl - Dot - in his kitchen, and to the look of guilt on his face.

When the pair of you finally arrived outside your parents house you immediately rushed to your childhood bedroom and closed the door, barely even saying 'hello' to your family, leaving Yelena to fend for herself.

A week passed by quickly, and Christmas approached. Your family kept trying to drag you into family activities, hoping to cheer you up.

"Why don't you come to the Christmas Market with me?" Your mum would ask.

"Or maybe we could take the dog for a walk?" Your dad would suggest.

"Christmas movie marathon?" Was your older brother's proposal.

You always went with them and joined in, not wanting to upset them during the holidays, but your heart wasn't really in it, and it was clear that they knew that. You hadn't told them what had happened, you didn't even tell Yelena until the night before Christmas Eve.

She had come into you room where you were sat in bed, watching a crappy Christmas movie on Netflix, although you hadn't really been paying attention, your mind focused on the last conversation that you'd had with Bucky.

"So, are you planning to tell me what's going on?" She asked from the doorway, ripping your thoughts away and bringing you back to reality. When you didn't immediately answer she moved to position herself in your bed beside you, pulling the covers up to keep her warm. "What happened between you and Professor Barnes?"

In all honesty, you were embarrassed, ashamed that you had ever let yourself fall into that trap in the first place. But as Yelena pushed, begging you to tell her, you finally let it spill from your lips.

Tears welled in your eyes as you spoke, letting out everything that you had been holding to yourself for the past week. Her expression was that of shock and sympathy as you continued to tell the story, even letting slip that you had brought his present with you because for a second, when you had been getting ready to leave the next day, you had completely forgotten what had happened, until it hit you again as soon as you sat down in the car.

"I'm so sorry," was all Yelena could say, and you shrugged, wiping a stray tear from your cheek.

"You know the stupidest part?" You continued. "I actually thought that this was the one that was going to last. That this was real, that I was important to him. I guess not."

You choked back a sob, but as soon as Yelena wrapped her arms around you and pulled you into a tight hug, you began to weep, unable to hold it back any longer. The pair of you sat like that for most of the night, your head resting on her shoulder, until you both finally fell asleep.

Christmas Eve was usually your favourite time of year; the anticipation, the festivities, the magical feeling of knowing that Christmas was only one sleep away. But you didn't feel very festive that year. You curled up on the sofa, your family and Yelena long asleep already. You held a cup of tea in your hands to warm them from the cold, the fire blazing in the hearth. The lights were turned off, but the golden glow from the Christmas tree in the corner was enough to light the room as you sat there, absentmindedly watching 'Elf', waiting for the moment that sleep would take over and you'd finally be able to head to bed.

You took a sip of your tea, glancing out of the window at the snowy landscape. Elmdale may be a small town with not much going on, but during winter time it was truly beautiful. The moon was bright in the sky, an almost unhindered view of the stars visible to you even through the window. The orange beams of the street lamps shone down onto the country road outside, bouncing off the sheet of thick white snow that had fallen throughout the day, illuminating the figure that stood on the other side of the street.

You froze, sitting up in your seat to get a better look at the figure. They were looking directly through the window, straight at you, and as they took a step forward into the light, you were able to make out the features of their face.

Within a second you were on your feet, rushing out into the snow, your slippers doing little to keep your feet warm in the snow, the thin jumper that fell to you mid-thigh barely protecting you from the cold.

"Y/N."

"Bucky, what are you doing here?" You asked when you finally reached him, looking up at him. His blue eyes twinkled in the street lamp - he looked tired, almost as tired as you knew you also looked.

"I-I couldn't go another day without seeing you," he said quietly. "Without explaining."

You sighed, shaking your head as you brought your arms to wrap around your body. "I think it's too late for that Bucky."

"Please." It sounded almost like a beg, as if he were pleading for you to just listen to him, even for a second. Slowly you nodded, looking up at him again as he prepared himself to explain. "I didn't sleep with Dot."

Your heart hurt at the sound of her name, at the memory of her looking you up and down as she introduced herself as if she were judging every inch of you, of finding out that Bucky had told her about you.

"I swear I didn't," he continued, running a hand through his hair, a tell-tale sign that he was stressed. "She's an old hook-up, someone that I used to see whenever she was in town. She showed up at my door, soaked through from the snow. I gave her a dry shirt to wear and a drink to warm her up, and as soon as she was changed and feeling better, I explained that it wouldn't happen this time because of you. She completely understood, and had already booked a hotel and called an Uber when you arrived. Nothing happened, Dot means nothing to me, not like you do."

You paused, squinting your eyes slightly in surprise. You wanted to trust him, you really did, but you couldn't be certain, after everything that had taken place, that he was telling the truth.

"I told her all about you, how amazing you are," he kept going. "I told her that I didn't want anyone else but you. How I've already applied for a position at NYU so that we can be together, because you're more important than anythin-"

"You applied to transfer to NYU?" You interrupted, astonished.

"Yes," Bucky smiled. "And I got accepted. I start after winter break."

"Y-You did that for me?" You couldn't quite wrap your head around it, that he would give up his position at SHIELD Institute for you.

"Of course I did," he replied, placing his hands on your elbows, pulling you closer slightly. "I would do anything for you. I love you."

You felt as if you could cry once again, but this time for a completely different reason. He had said the three words that you had been waiting, hoping, to hear. You couldn't stop yourself from reaching up, wrapping your arms around his neck, and planting a kiss to his lips. He melted into the kiss, melted into you, his arms quickly wrapping around your waist.

"I love you too," you said with a smile as you pulled away. It was him that instigated the kiss this time, smiling against your lips happily. When the pair of you were suitably out of breath, you parted, and Bucky reached down, bringing your hands into his.

"You're so cold, doll," he said, planting a warming kiss to your knuckles. He quickly removed his jacket, draping it over your shoulders, before you reached for his hand again, guiding him to your home.

"What's going on?" Your dad's voice sounded from the top of the stairs as you and Bucky made your way inside, closing the door behind you. "Who the hell is this?"

You beamed up at your parents, who stood on the top step of the staircase, your brother hovering behind them, Yelena leaning against the wall with a smile, all of them looking down at you and Bucky. You chuckled, glancing at Bucky before looking back at your parents.

"This is Bucky," you said with a smile. "My boyfriend."

Your family quickly rushed down the stairs, bustling you and Bucky into the kitchen and seating you at the dining table. Your mum whipped up a mug of hot chocolate for everyone, and the whole family, plus Yelena, crowded around the table. They fell into conversation easily, as they always did, asking how you and Bucky had met, to which you replied in a bar, and your dad had warned you against dating drinkers. Thankfully, Bucky knew that he was joking, and had laughed aloud with the rest of your family, squeezing your hand under the table.

Not long after they began throwing questions in Bucky's direction. For a second worry grew in the pit of your stomach - what if they didn't like him? What if he accidentally let slip that he was your teacher? But Bucky answered every question with ease, almost as if it were natural to him.

"Where are you from Bucky?" You mum asked, leaning forward in her seat towards him.

"New York born and bred," Bucky explained, taking a sip of his drink. "Besides college in DC, I've always lived in New York."

"And what do you do now?" Your dad asked, raising a brow at him. Bucky threw a concerned glance to you, but quickly recovered.

"I work in the education sector," he said with a flash of his charming smile, pushing his glasses up his nose just slightly.

"Ah good!" You dad beamed. "A very respectable job."

"Did you know that you're the first guy that Y/N's ever brought home?" Your brother piped up, motioning to you. Bucky frowned, looking at you with a smirk.

"Is that so?" He chuckled, and you could feel the blush rising on your cheeks.

An hour or so later everyone retreated back to bed due to the late hour, but you and Bucky decided to stay. You watched your family make their way upstairs and caught, for a second, as your mum leaned in to talk to Yelena.

"He's cute," she said with a smile, glancing back over her shoulder, causing Yelena to laugh.

"That is right," she chuckled, throwing a wink at you. "You could even say he is a hotty."

You chuckled, finally cuddling up on the couch with Bucky and watching the end of the movie that you had been watching when he had arrived.

"Your family is nice," Bucky said finally, his fingers absentmindedly drawing patterns on your shoulder as you snuggled closer to his chest.

"I think they like you," you smiled up at him, the movie quickly forgotten. "They like people that they can joke around with."

"Is it true that I'm the first guy you've ever brought home?" He asked, raising an eyebrow. You giggled slightly, glad to finally be back to normal with him, as if everything had fallen into place exactly, no cracks, no seams, just perfection.

"That is true," you laughed.

"And why is that?" He chuckled, but you simply shrugged.

"No one else was ever important enough."

Bucky beamed.

"Oh, I almost forgot," Bucky said, sitting up and leaning down to reach into his bag. "I got you a present."

You jumped to your feet quickly. "So did I, wait here."

You rushed up to your room, rooting through your suitcase until you found the little wrapped book, running back down to the living room and falling into the couch beside him. With a smile you exchanged presents with him.

Your fingers slid under the wrapping paper of his gift to you, pulling it open gently. As you removed the paper, you turned the gift over in your hand, recognizing immediately the same sky-blue leather and hand-painted gold borders. You looked up, catching his eye, and the pair of you fell into a fit of laughter. You had bought each other the exact same book.

You hand trailed over the hand-painted golden lettering on the front cover.

A complete history of Halley's Comet.

"Let me guess," Bucky chuckled. "Cogito Books?"

"Exactly," you laughed in response. You leaned forward, placing a quick kiss to his lips. "I love you."

"I love you too."

From the corner of your eye you saw a tag attached to the wrapping paper that you had just ripped away. You picked it up, plucking the tag from the paper and opening it to read the words written in his scrawl.

To Y/N, My Everything. Merry Christmas. Love, your Professor, Bucky.

| @eclecticpatrolroadlawyer | @moonlightreader649 | @stormy-stardust |

[parin-gurumin]

Although I don't particularly care about popularity or receiving attention, due to the nature of how my experience on twitter has been like these past few years, I have always enjoyed the Tumblr experience far more than any other platform. People are far more likely to interact by means of overall reblogging and adding comments in the tags, it's very sweet and motivating.

I came back to homestuck after A DECADE because of me having a rough, mentally and emotionally draining week because my impulsive thinking was like, "Hey man, fuck it, how far into Homestuck do you think I can read before I get help. (from discord support for context)" I had never actually read it when I was a kid because I just didn't have the attention span and willpower to read through SO much dialogue. I only ever interacted with it by means of just celebrating it as a fan who never actually read it, but liked it nonetheless. Of course now that I am a grown ass adult who can make their own conscious decisions and actually has the time and whatever to actually both appreciate AND enjoy reading extensively I am enjoying homestuck way more than I ever did before. I know that because of the death of flash (fuckin rip, dude, AWFUL) and extensive information about Hussie (TO PUT IT LIGHTLY) have since made getting into the comic a bit of a hassle and a choice it makes me wish I had actually read it at its best performance.

But, back on topic, twitter and other socials have the tendency to be particularly attached to trend hopping and sticking with what's currently doing numbers. Because, again, I don't care about dabbling in trends I just do what I want and ultimately that causes people to just not care about what I create. I have grown very apathetic towards my art and due to academic trauma from having been in a private art college with a low acceptance rate I have been in art burn out hell for literal years. The mix of both nobody caring about my art and my own rocky broken relationship with art made me extremely unmotivated yet long for the joys of creation once more.

Whenever I post here specifically it brings me joy again, it makes me realize that YES PEOPLE ACTUALLY DO CARE ABOUT AND ENJOY WHAT I MAKE NO MATTER WHAT IT MAY BE AND ITS CURRENT POPULARITY. I'm very happy seeing the same faces in the likes and/or rbs for my posts. I'm very happy seeing the same person revisit and reblog it for a second time or more. I'm very happy with how close and genuine it feels. (in a non-parasocial way) I'm just glad that despite this site being in a perpetual state of uncertainty, run by a skeleton crew, functions like shit, current CEO is a moron and the site is set to sail until it dies naturally it became the most genuine feeling of the social platforms ESPECIALLY for art.

I know this has gotten very longwinded and is essentially chaotic practically emotional rambling but like, thank you!!!!!!!!!

I have more stuff to come and from the bottom of my heart genuinely appreciate everyone's support here, it actually means the world to me. THANK YOUUUUUU!!!!!!!!

MY OLD ART BTW!!!!!! anything that's not in that small 2021 corner is 2013-early 2014

[ratherbefangirling]

I posted 1,740 times in 2022

That's 1,518 more posts than 2021!

204 posts created (12%)

1,536 posts reblogged (88%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@jung-koook

@namchyoon

@amoc94

@bang-tan-bitches

@mintsugarmy

I tagged 569 of my posts in 2022

#bts - 86 posts

#bts x reader - 79 posts

#bts au - 57 posts

#bts fanfic - 57 posts

#bts fluff - 48 posts

#i awnsers - 48 posts

#kim namjoon - 46 posts

#bts angst - 35 posts

#park jimin - 33 posts

#jeon jungkook - 31 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#but seriously every time i find an amazing fanfiction i'm holding my breath crossing my fingers and scrolling to the ending notes hoping to

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Drabble : Blind for you

Pairing: Yandere Taehyung x toxic darling reader

Summary: Who thought blind could turn into blissful

Warning: Yandere, mentioned lovemaking non explicit (they do makeout though i guess), mentioned cheating.

More in this universe 🖤

Taehyung isn't interested in any of the blind date candidates he has met so far. They are the same old boring women.

Until he meets you.

At first you don't seem to be worthy enough for his attention. Honestly he just wanted to try the latest menu of the restaurant and Jungkook refused to accompany him because he was on a diet, the traitor.

You are an anxious mess. Easily startled when he comes sits infront of you. Your hands tiny compared to his are fiddling but he pretends not to notice that.

"You must be Miss Y/n. I'm Taehyung. Nice to meet you."

You were perhaps not ready to meet him because for a while you just stare at his face he doesn't blame you its hard to come across a face like his, but then you realise yourself and offer him a polite smile.

"Same.. I feel the same." you say.

He nods.

The server comes to takes your order.

You are torn on what to decide.

"I would like the same as his." You tell the server trying your best not to seem to out of place hating you are out of your comfort zone.

Then you both talk light topics. Taehyung is bored, he can tell you're pretending. Like calls to like afterall.

"So Miss Y/n What are you looking for in a partner?" He asks really not interested.

"Someone who can protect me?" You say eyes earnest. Wouldn't it be lovely to kill the hope in you.

"As lovely as you are I'm not the one youre looking for I am not a good man."

"I didn't ask for a good man." You said taking a sip of your drink.

He raises an eyebrow. Amused by the turn of conversation, do you even know what you're talking about.

"I just want someone to love and protect me."

"Waiting for your prince charming cinderella." He laughs rolling his eyes internally.

"No I don't mind a villain. Rather I'm fond of them."

A misinformed kid, he thinks. Probably with a saviour complex.

But then he looks at you, really looks at you and there is something about you which makes him feel that there is something more.

"You are very interesting Miss Y/n. Has someone told you that."

"You just did."

See the full post

295 notes - Posted August 27, 2022

#4

In too deep

Summary: Reconnecting with Jungkook you realise you never really knew him.

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Warning ⚠️: Yandere behaviour

His eyes were so pretty why would anyone blame you for falling but nobody told you his love was a maze with no escape

He stared at you with those precious doe eyes.

"Little Dove."

Your last memory of Jungkook has been of this shy kind boy who was so easily flustered that it was comical that was two years ago.

"Jungkook." You breathe out his name.

"You sound so sexy when you say my name dove."

You blush. You had no idea he could be like this.

Fiery intimidating but so in control.

You are dressed in your favourite sexy red outfit. You watch him as he checks you out shamelessly.He is dressed in a red shirt with way too many buttons open and skinny black ripped jeans.

He catches you looking at him and smirks.

How you had landed in this situation was a bit complicated.

Your younger sister was getting married. Your mother had asked you about your partner. Promising to set you up herself if you had denied. You had told her you were seeing someone but it was too early to meet the parents.Your sister had suggested meeting them on a double date.

Searching for a convincing guy proved harder than you had thought possible so after your sister had sent you the date for the date. Your fear became real.

Hurrying from work one fateful day you crashed into Jungkook transferring the cream of your cupcake into his shirt. You and Jungkook studied at the same University. He was the famous prodigy of the computer science department. Even though you joined at the same time he was completing his PhD when you graduated. You had met him at the lamb skewers shop located near your college.

"I'm sorry...Ju... jeon Jungkook., I'm y/n remember .. we went to the same uni we used to meet at the lamb skewers shop."

"Hi y/n. I remember" He replies.

"I'm so sorry I'm in a hurry please take my buisness card.. call me or text me your account for cleaning." You say giving him your card and leaving for work.

He called you later asking you to treat him to coffee instead and you obliged.

It was then you spilled the fact you needed a fake boyfriend.

"I could be one." He offered.

" You sure. Like 100%...Like definitely."

"I am."

"Remember when in college you never dated because you were an IU fanboy." You teased.

"Come on I never called you out for listening Mono on repeat." He countered.

"Wait when did I tell you I listen to Mono."

"You've put it on your story so many times."

See the full post

325 notes - Posted January 10, 2022

#3

Belong (3)

Part 1 | 2 | 3 | 4

Pairing: ot7 x reader

Genre: omegaverse au, hurt/comfort, Angst, romance

Synopsis: You seem to be falling in love with the pack and Jungkook isn't very happy but what will happen when. He realises you are his mate?

No warnings?! (Did I actually 😳 manage that)

Am I regretting making the different moodboards yes yes I am but was I still too invested to back out also yes

Your mother knocks on your door.

"Coming!!" You tell her opening your window and spraying all sorts of perfumes in the air so she doesn't worry about you.

Happy thoughts think happy thoughts . You think to yourself.

And it kind of sucks that all in the top of your head belong to the pack.

Your mom sits in the kitchen working on her laptop . A food package opened.

"Did you order something?" You ask sitting on the other side of the table.

"No the neighbour brought it."

"You hang out."

"Yeah a bit."

"Isn't he too old for you ?" She asks munching on the muffin her work abandoned for now.

"It's not like that he just helped me out before."

"Fine this old mother will nor interfere in your life."

"It's not that... ugh" You say picking for yourself some savory focacia bread.

"He did bring you breakfast after whatever happened to get you so depressed."

"You noticed."

"If I don't point everything does not mean I don't notice young lady."

"Mom." You say and go hug her. Nothing beats her calming scent anyway.

"My baby." She cooed. "Should we invite them to dinner so you can show me the skills you learnt in your cooking classes."

See the full post

344 notes - Posted October 7, 2022

#2

Belong (2)

Part 1 / 2 / 3

Pairing: ot7 x reader

Genre: omegaverse au, hurt/comfort, Angst, romance

Synopsis: You seem to be falling in love with the pack and Jungkook isn't very happy but what will happen when. He realises you are his mate?

Warnings: Mentions of eating disorders, self harming behavior, themes of depression and anxiety, anger issues(someone gets hurt)

Jungkook locks himself in his room angry at his pack. Only coming out to sneak in food.

The pack feels guilty and decide to plan a surprise vacation. While they didn't regret having you around they still cannot neglect there baby alpha.

All preparations are made.

Taehyung is kind of sad to be the one to tell you (Just because he lost in stone paper scissors.) You are saddened and he just wants to hug you till you feel better.

But you put on a brave smile and tell him he must give you a party later. He readily agrees and peace is made.

Noticeably you visit less. The pack is kind of disappointed.

Even though it is outside the house you do spend time with them, you and Joon enjoy hanging out in the park. You refuse to share earphones asking him to just put the song in speakers and Namjoon is kind of disappointed and he wants to protest hating the boundaries you have put but unable to say anything against them.

You, Hobi and Jimin go shopping together. It's fun you try on things. You suggest each other ridiculous clothes. You even beat them at the dance step machine in the arcade. Causing you all to laugh so hard that your stomachs hurt.

When Hobi asks you opinion for earrings.

"Are you planning on getting your ears pierced?" You question.

"No I thinks it suits you." Hecsays brightly.

"It's pretty but I didn't bring the money."

"Let me get then for you." He offers

"No. ... you don't have to why don't you get something for Tae his birthday is coming." You say.

Jimin silently notes your behaviour but passes it of as a sign of comfort but when Hobi comes close to kiss your forehead as they drop you of and you step back; He can't help but think Jungkook's word have deeply hurt you more than they could imagine.

Taehyung and you eat out. Going to different aesthetic cafe's. Yoongi accompanies too Because its been a whole week since you stepped inside the house. He's been counting and when he suggests to watch a movie together at the house which even surprises Taehyung because usually Yoongi's social battery would have run out. You just say next time.

When Jin complains of missing you. You with your brave face on, come visit him once or twice careful to not run into Jungkook.

It takes you 30 minutes to knock, Namjoon notices who himself had been out to bike and had seen you when he was leaving for a ride. He decides to wait until you went inside not wanting to embarass you.

Yoongi hung around Jin when you came.

Close to Taehyung's birthday Jungkook's rut hits.

He wakes up very groggy, very out of consciousness. Until he goes to the couch in the loving room and you had forgotten a scarf and it has your scent Jungkook just nuzzles into it. Happy to have the scent. His wolf satisfied for now.

Hoseok wakes up early and goes to get his clothes he had put out to dry last night when he stumbles upon Jungkook.

He swears to himself. They had checked earlier but no one had planned for an unexpected rut. He woke up Jin and Namjoon to help him usher Jungkook to the nesting room and prepare for his rut.

"Hyungie." He murmurs only half awake.

See the full post

370 notes - Posted September 23, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Belong

Part 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5

Pairing: Ot7 x reader

Genre : mostly fluff. {Tragic backstory.. the usual and a n g s t .. sorry not sorry } omegaverse, hurt /comfort

Warnings : reader's not confident and maybe anxious ... mentions of incidents but not in detail

Notes: people present at ages 21-24, late and early presentation also occurs.

⚜️⚜️⚜️

Imagine you a sweet smelling omega are neighbours with BTS.

With their subgender as follows Namjoon, Hoseok, Jungkook as Alpha, Jin and Yoongi as beta and Taehyung and Jimin as omegas.

So Taehyung and Jimin are go to an omega focused campaign event and you are there and they meet you and your scent smells really nice except it has a bitter after note to it. Still in the large amount of people they overlook it.

You go to cooking classes where you stumble upon Joon who wants to surprise Jin on his birthday with a meal without destroying the kitchen.

You end up talking as you help him with his cooking. Your inner omega preening under praise from an alpha.

As your cooking improves so does your confidence increases now you won't die alone, your alpha would love a mate who could cook.

Also you develop a crush on this handsome, kind alpha and a part of you knows it's wrong to let your feelings out of hand but you still decide to bake him something because you'd do anything to make him smile at you fondly.

So off you go to the supermarket to get ingredients to bake something.

Someone nearly hits you with their cart. Your eyes widen and you freeze on the spot.

The beta, a very tall and handsome beta. You know its a beta because his scent is faint. Beta scents are faint to everyone except their mates.

"I'm sorry are you ok" he ask concerned.

" I am fine."

"Thank goodness." He says and then spots the paper in your hand. "Looks like you're looking for baking supplies and you seem stressed. I'm a good Baker if I say so myself. Please let me help as an apology."

And your first instinct is to say no. Namjoon's face flahes infront of you.... you need all the help you can get.

You find Jin to be pleasant company. He guides you to the best things.

You are so engrossed in Seokjin that you dont see Yoongi approach. Yoongi eyes you and asks Jin if the grocery shopping was done.

Jin tells him how he was helping you find ingredients. Yoongi shakes his head and picks an easy to make mix and hands it to you.

"Here this would be easier and cheaper." He says.

That's how the two leave. Two Betas in a relationship you wonder if they have a pack at home.

You wonder how nice it would be to have a pack .

It was only you and your mom at your house. Your dad an omega. Had passed away, so had your little siblings. Your mom had thrown herself into work and with the insurance money and support manage to buy a big house to compensate the small space which killed your family. But bigger the house emptier it was.

You end up making a cake and take it to the classes. You are getting late though.

So you decide to take a shortcut except you come across some rowdy alpha.

See the full post

547 notes - Posted September 8, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[musesofthemoon]

I posted 346 times in 2022

That's 274 more posts than 2021!

149 posts created (43%)

197 posts reblogged (57%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@frostchilld

@musesofthemoon

@shiroi---kumo

@rpmemes-galore

@bcrcavcd

I tagged 342 of my posts in 2022

Only 1% of my posts had no tags

#meme - 100 posts

#ooc - 59 posts

#cotton cookie - ic - 22 posts

#frostchilld - 22 posts

#starter call - 21 posts

#cotton cookie - threads - 20 posts

#ai - ic - 17 posts

#cotton cookie - relationships - surely she will wait until that reply comes (frostchilld) - 14 posts

#mari - ic - 14 posts

#yu - ic - 14 posts

Longest Tag: 109 characters

#you don't even have to reply to this or anything my brain just got the muse way later than it should have rip

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Hey y’all! Got some icons set up for the twins, so like if you want a thread with either of them!

6 notes - Posted October 20, 2022

#4

@dcviated​ 

"Cecilia? Good morning... I didn't expect to see you here this early." Raguna takes a pause in the clearing of his field, shouldering the scythe to pass a quizzical smile to the young elf. "Russell knows you're out and about, right?"

It’s not as though Cecilia wouldn’t have liked to see Raguna around town on any other day. She would be happy, usually, but she was a little unhappy to see that her plan to try and sneak around the fields wasn’t going to work. She wanted to see one of the bigger caves today, just so she could be seen as a Big Girl! She knew no one would really let her go on her own, especially not to Toros... 

She couldn’t let Raguna know that, though...

See the full post

6 notes - Posted May 20, 2022

#3

@offlyingwater​ || s.c.

Ever since her trip to Wonderland, Ai had found it more difficult to find herself at any sort of beach. Sure, even going to it before was rare, usually once every year or two during the summer, and it was always a longer trip since her parents didn’t want the children on the coast with the Pillar of Darkness, having to instead go to the other side of Sadoshima in order to go at all.

Considering how hard at work the twins’ parents had been as of recent, she found herself missing those trips. Sure, it wasn’t like she wanted to distract them, considering they’ve always been hard workers, and the world still had the promise of threat looming over its head, but it still felt lonelier than ever, the fond memories seeming to be a catalyst for it. So, the one person she could think to just vent to, as she’s sure Yu probably feels some sort of similar way to her already, is Clear.

She certainly looks a bit dramatic, although she doesn’t plan on acting so horribly sad the whole time they talk, its hard to be super cheerful as this weighs on her. “Hey Clear? Is it selfish to feel sad about something you know you can’t do right now?”

6 notes - Posted October 23, 2022

#2

Onion Cookie heard of the new cookie making their home in the village. She always seemed to hear things, since no one but Blackberry Cookie could quite speak with her. She always begged them not to leave when they finished their conversations, but no one ever seemed to listen. Nevertheless, she wished to keep trying. She wanted to make at least one friend, if she could...

The cookie in question was caught in the little ghost’s sights, which she soon made her way over to. She found it somewhat difficult to figure out just how to get the Cookie’s attention, especially since he wasn’t looking in her direction, so she opted to speak, in hopes of finally finding someone to hear her. “Helloooooo?” she asked, her voice slightly shaking with a mixture of anticipation, and fear of rejection.

@frostchilld

6 notes - Posted November 30, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

@frostchilld | s.c.

She knows she has something great to show Sherbet Cookie today. Because today, she found something she’d never quite seen before, especially for being outside in the climate she lived in. The excitement is clear on her face as she opens the door to her friend’s home, almost bursting at the seams as she tries to hide what she’s holding. It’s a flower, a little yet vibrant flower. She’d heard of them, sure, but she’d never seen one for herself before, since it was always so cold in their little village. So her discovery felt so very exciting!

“Sherbet Cookie, I found something really cool when I was exploring today!” she chirps, though still keeping one hand behind her back. “But you have to guess. Can you guess what I got?” She knew she was probably too excited about something so small, and yet she didn’t care. She wanted him to see it too, since who knew when he’d be able to go out in order to find something like this? He deserved to have the chance to see the world, even if it was through someone else’s means.

9 notes - Posted November 26, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[fratricideknight]

oh boy. i hate reblogging fandom wank but. the bias towards dean over sam and the way that some people seem to be in straight up denial over who his character really is can be soul-sucking. it's okay to like a character who can be kind of a dick - that's part of what makes his character interesting. that we're supposed to root for this guy who salivates over highschoolers and see him as our righteous hero. he's majorly flawed, much more so than sam is, and that's okay! they're just different kinds of characters. what isn't okay is victim-blaming and twisting stuff beyond recognition, because those justifications carry over into real life. if you make a serious argument that this fictional character is really at fault for 'allowing' himself to be manipulated, then you are still arguing that people can be at fault for actions they are victims of. not cool. about that, though: i understand what you're (op) saying about dean consciously choosing to do wrong, but i still think you're being somewhat unfair. dean didn't know that breaking and torturing others would kickstart the apocalypse - as far as he was concerned, he was torturing people who would be tortured regardless, because he couldn't take it anymore after thirty years. fair enough, in my book.

liking sam more is just personal preference. you can like any fictional character as much as you want, no matter how fucked up they are. but yeah... the big preference for dean in certain spaces is mind-boggling. i literally love him, but he's an acquired taste. and when i say i love him, i mean as a character. in real life, i would not want much to do with him. sam, on the other hand, is best friend material, even if it gets me killed within a week - bc it isn't his fault supernatural forces are always vying for his attention! i feel the same way. there is more to dean's character than selfishness and dickishness, which is why i love him, but he is undeniably both of those things and more! if you deny this, i invite you to reassess your principles. sam has so much going for him and the fact that he gets so much hate and purely inaccurate nonsense tossed at him is, again, soul-sucking. the criticisms that people often make about him are both ludicrous and concerning. like running with the idea that he's some educational elitist who looks down on dean for dropping out of highschool. literally what are you talking about? but also, are you always this belligerent to anyone who enjoys and craves education for themself without looking down on others, solely because you don't feel the same way? do you immediately rip to shreds anyone who isn't exactly like you and doesn't value the same things you do? this has been established already, but i'll say it outright: some level of empathy is required.

I think another thing that makes me really bitter about Supernatural and its fandom is best demonstrated by the Supernatural TV Tropes page, and the various entries about the show elsewhere on the website. Tropers are generally really good about analyzing characters, but when it comes to Supernatural, there’s barely anyone defending Sam.

So many times, Dean is referred to as the “selfless” one. He gets the positively worded descriptions - fun, playful, smart, heroic, tragic. His real flaws are ignored for ones that sound prettier - loyalty and devotion, instead of possessiveness and selfishness. Sam on the other hand, what does he get? Called selfish and proud, even though he’s the most selfless and least proud character on the show. His best character traits and story arcs are stripped away from him because people want to claim that they fit Dean better.

Eric Kripke said himself that he wrote the story centred around Sam. That’s what those first five seasons - the best seasons - were. Sam was the Messianic archetype. He sacrificed himself to save the world. He released Lucifer, and he took all of the blame even though it was only partly his fault. He took all of the responsibility, and he had the willpower to overcome the Devil and throw them both into the Cage. He died so everyone else could live. But the entry about the Messianic archetype on the TV Tropes page? Sure, Sam’s mentioned - but as the second bullet point, after Dean is called the “most selfless and martyr-like individual on the show”.

No one in universe, and very few people out of universe, talk about how Dean was just as responsible as Sam for releasing Lucifer in the first place. In fact, he might be more. Sam had no reason to believe that killing Lilith would be a bad thing - as far as he knew, she was trying to break the final seal, and he needed to stop her. No one was telling him the truth. The only person trying to stop him was Dean, and Dean’s way of going about that was calling him a monster for drinking demon’s blood. So Sam ended up breaking the first seal because of a lack of information. Dean on the other hand, he broke the first seal, and that was a very conscious choice. Dean voluntarily tortured souls in hell. To save himself pain, he tortured others, and that set the ball rolling.

Despite this, Dean doesn’t take any responsibility. He blames Sam for all of it - he blames the one who was abused and manipulated, rather than think about his own responsibility.

Sam Winchester has done everything for other people, and yet all of his sacrifices are seen as just fixing what he broke. His character is criminally misunderstood. Sam deserves so much more.

[glacial-snowflakes]

Freak // Eddie Munson x Y/N

Pairing: Eddie Munson x fem!Wheeler!reader

Word count: 1,09k

Summary: Being tired with the way you're boyfriend is treated force you to take action.

WARNINGS: some swear words, minor spoilers

Likes, comments, and reblogs are greatly appreciated. It’s really motivating <3

Some people are like open books, but not Eddie Munson, no. His heart was wrapped with a thick chain secured with a padlock, and only a few individuals had a key to it. You, obviously, were one of them - Y/N Wheeler, this year's graduate and a dear girlfriend of his. 

Eddie never liked to brag about his personal life, so not many actually knew you two were in a relationship. You were his greatest secret that he promised himself to take to the grave with him. Well... Maybe not that dramatic, but he persistently tried to keep nosy students away from your love. Number one of the reasons was his not-so-saint reputation, and he didn't want you to become a target of snarky remarks. Though he'd managed to succeed for quite a time, it all collapsed in a blink of an eye. But that wasn't his fault...

*

"Enjoy your meal, dear." 

You've heard the kind voice of a cafeteria worker as you got your last piece of lunch placed on your tray. You thanked her with a smile and immediately headed down to the table you'd sat at from the first day of school. Your friends were already there, gossiping about the last basketball match. 

"Y/N, what do you think?" Vickie asked you as soon as you squeezed between her and Robin.

"About what?"

"Yesterday's Jason speech."

"And his gooey love confession? Or using a tragedy to encourage the team to win a game? Because the first one made me want to vomit, and the second made me almost rip my ears out. Fucked up." You poked a hole in a juice with a straw. 

"So you share our views." They laughed.

"The devil has come to America. Dungeons and Dragons, at first regarded as a harmless game of make-believe, now has both parents and psychologists concerned." A familiar voice reached your ears and caught your attention as you were about to take a mouthful of a bun. Like magic, a broader but still subtle smile appeared on your face. You completely zoned out from conversation by your table. Instead, you focused on an article that your boyfriend read aloud to Hellfire Club's members.

"Studies have linked violent behavior to the game, saying it promotes satanic worship, ritual sacrifice, sodomy, suicide, and even... murder!" 

Eddie's laugh was enough to turn your head towards his group. You noticed your brother sitting by the table with Dustin. He gave you a look that said, "get lost, sis.". We'll see who'll give you a ride to the arcade next time you ask. You thought to yourself and stuck your tongue out. You'd probably make some faces to each other if not your boyfriend, who suddenly got on the table and distracted you from the teasing.

"We're the freaks because we like to play a fantasy game. But as long as you're into band... or science... or parties... or a game where you toss balls into laundry baskets-" 

"You want something, freak?" Jason instantly stood up, taking a few steps toward Eddie. Oh boy, the troubles begin.

Now everyone was watching the two of them. As you predicted, Munson didn't give any shit. He raised his hands to make devil horns on his head, spluttering with his tongue stuck out from his mouth.

"Prick," Carver said before heading to his seat.

And before you could even think about anything, words shot out from you like your lips were the rifle aimed at your biggest enemy. "Oh, fuck off!" All eyes were on you now, whether you liked it or not. There was no way out, so instead of running away like a coward, you got up from the chair you'd been sitting on and faced Jason.

"What did you say?" The team captain looked at you.

"Don't act like you didn't understand. Stop saying shit about Eddie." 

"Or what?" Jason got closer to you. Sudden chairs' movements were heard, and all the Hellfire Club got up like they were about to have your back. A loud thud meant Munson jumped off the table.

"Y/N-" Eddie tried to catch your attention, but you waved at him to make him stop.

"What "or what"? Do you think I'm threatening you? I'm not that stupid. Don't be a dick and fuck off from Eddie, that's all."

"I think you actually are dumb, Wheeler." You extended your arm to stop your boyfriend and brother from rushing to Jason. "He IS crazy."

You glanced at Eddie, who looked angry, ready to fight for the woman he loved. For a moment, you thought he acted foolishly. Not him wanting to protect you but being willing to throw hands, knowing well that the whole basketball team would beat the shit out of him. That's when you realized...

"You know what?" Your eyes went back to Jason. "You're right. He is crazy... But in a good way. This is what makes him so attractive. Not that you can relate. You, Jason Carver, are like a poorly written character that is so perfectly boring. A golden boy without any flaw that thinks of himself as the best. In fact, your personality is dull, blank... And, honestly? Listening to you makes everyone want to puke their guts out." Students burst into laughter. "Without further due, leave my boyfriend alone and get lost because now my lunch is cold because of you."

The word boyfriend traveled from mouth to mouth like a ping pong ball bouncing back to back during an intense match. To be frank, you couldn't care less. You were finally free. There was no need to hide anymore. Whether Eddie liked that or not, it doesn't matter to you. 

You kept your eyes on Jason, not letting him win this fight. You were done with the way he treated someone so important to you, someone, you loved so dearly. 

"Y/N." A quiet whisper rang into your ear when the arms wrapped around your waist. Munson pulled you away because he knew you. You wouldn't back down so easily. "For someone who doesn't like to make scenes, that was quite a spectacular one." You could feel Eddie's lips brushing your ear.

"I told you, there was no need to hide our relationship. I can protect us both." 

Your boyfriend chuckled. "You're right. I was stupid."

"No, I'd say you were crazy." A broad grin crept onto your face.

"Crazily in love with you." Eddie winked, trying to sound as cute as he could.

"Ew, Munson. That's gross."

"Ew, Wheeler. You're right."

tag: @eddie-munsons-sweetheart @eddieemunson @beauty-in-the-brkdwn @dragon-ash13 @notafinalgirl

[avatar-of-procrastination]

Doctors Orders

HCs / Imagines for Dune characters (2021)

~Imagine being a healer who's caught the eye of a few of the Dune Chatacters~

AN: I tried my level best to keep this gn. So i avoided fem/male pronouns to the best of my abilites. Pls lmk if i unkowingly added some.

And as always, likes and reblogs are well appreciated <33

(Pardon my grammar. Eng is not my first lang) (gifs not mine)

☆ Paul Atreides ☆

My boi is absolutely smitten the moment he sees you.

It was a normal day in training and he had a few scrapes here and there

His mother did not let him eat dinner before checking up with Dr. Yueh. Unfortunately for him, Dr. Yueh was attending his Father, leaving you, his apprentice in charge.

Paul was visibly shocked at how graceful you looked and handled his wounds. You blushed under his gaze and dressed his wounds before letting him go.

After that encounter, Paul made it his mission to get hurt every training session, even if it was the slightest of bruises.

And everytime he came into the infirmary, you'd end up falling in love with the raven haired duke just a bit more.

You found his visits endearing but also stupid. He was literally hurting himself to see you.

So the next time he came in for something silly, you didnt talk to him like you normally did. You simply prescribed some medicines on a piece of paper and walked away.

He was a bit hurt to see you ignore him. He was worried he overstepped boundaries the last time he came in.

When he opned the piece of paper, however, his face broke into a grin.

Meet me in the gardens. Doctors orders.

——————

☆ Duncan Idaho ☆

Now this guy is ripped af and rarely needs to go to the infirmary.

When he does, it's usually for something very serious

So you can imagine the shock on people's faces when they see him come regularly to the infirmary, without a scratch on his body.

This guy literally came to the healers for a paper cut

Why?

Because he wanted an excuse to talk to you, look at your wonderful face and make you blush with his goody comments

You were mesmerised by his gaze. Every single time. Your heart melted at his display of affections

You were in the middle of filing the medicine cabinet when Duncan rushed in, with a hand to his heart

Fear crippled you before you got on your senses and rushed to him

"What happened? Whats wrong? Are you alright?"

"Oh God. My heart. I think - It stopped beating."

"Wh-?"

"Until I saw you"

You could have punched him in the face fore scaring you like that but you involuntarily cracked a smile. Unable to control it, you giggled softly at his dorky grin before pulling him closer to you

"Well in that case, i must prescribe a day of resting, before a get well soon kiss."

Duncan grinned at your reply, "Yes, Doctor"

——————

☆ Duke Leto ☆

Now, catching the attention of a Duke was something that you never imagined

Like seriously, how does one get up one morning and go "oh yes, today I shall make the freaking duke be heads over heels for me"

Whether you did or not, the Duke was smitten by you.

Ever since you assisted Dr. Yueh in treating the wounds of the Duke after a particularly rough battle, he was entranced by the way you held yourself

As a person of high power, he couldnt afford to hurt himself like Paul just so he could get a excuse to talk to the healer that caught his eye.

So he made you his personal healer.

You were the first to reach him in any distress

And he loved seeing the care for him in your eyes.

Eventually he had the courage to ask you out on a date. But you'd be hesitant. Sure the back and fort flirting was exhilerating , but actually dating the duke?

"What will Lady Jessica say? What will Paul say?" You were close to the son of the Duke and didn't want things to get weird between you two

"Would you believe me if i said that this was their idea?"

You were shocked to say the least. But having being confirmed that the others were okay with you acting on your feelings, you became brave enough to initiate a kiss

The Duke smiled into the kiss and caressed your hair lovingly

"Lie down and rest. Let me take care of you. As a thank you for the times you've saved my life."

——————

☆ Lady Jessica ☆

Lady Jessica had some basic knowledge of medicine

She knew how to dress a wound, tie a bandage, etc.

What she didnt know was how to deal with dreams and nightmares

After Paul discussed having visions with her, she started having nightmares with Paul dying in battle. She always woke up with a start and never drifted back to sleep, causing bags to form beneath her eyes.

As a woman of steel, she regarded this with a pinch of salt and refused to take help

You however, were starting to get frustrated. As the appointed healer for the Lady, your superioirs were berating you for not "doing you job"

You were in half the mind to punch them but stopped yourself for the Lady's sake. If word got out about the nightmares, it would send Caldum into a state of panic, since Jessica was considered to be a powerful Bene Gesserit, who couldnt be easily shaken

You were becoming increasingly worried for her though. You could hear her screams some nights but couldnt get into her room to comfort her.

Your heart ached for the woman. But you could t get into her chambers with explicit permission fom the high ranking officials

So you talked to the Duke and he granted you permissiom to enter her chambers in the event of another nightmare

( he ships you both so hard omg )

That night, you hear shuffles and whimpers coming from Jessicas room and you slowly enter it.

You see her panting and clutching at the sheets. You slowly wake her up, not wanting to scare her further. You hug her, while running your arm up and down her back

She sees you and pulls you closer into her arms.

"Stay with me please"

"Ofcourse, M'lady"

I think its safe to say that Paul and Leto saw a rather well rested Jessica the next day

——————

☆ Gurney Halleck ☆

Even if Duncan never visited the infirmary for small cuts and bruises, he atleast went to the infirmary for a big wound

Gurney? He'd rather die than go to the infirmary

He hates the place. It makes him feel weak.

That is until he found a reason to willingly go the that god forsaken place. You

You always managed to break his stoic facade. You were one of the few people who were allowed to see his soft side, his smile, his adorable nature.

Sure, it made him vulnerable, buy he wouldnt want it anyother way

To say that the others are surprised is an understatement

But seeing their uptight swordmaster finally falling in love with someone was heart warming

That didn't mean they didnt tease him. Oh no. Now that you guys were official, the hurricane of teasing flooded in.

Whenever he was being bombarded with jokes, you'd go upto him and pull him away, muttering lovingly into his ears.

"Sorry people, I've got to go. Doctor's orders."

Requests are open!