#really wanted to draw them super bad so i took a break from the 6 characters thing

[slavhew]

ww

[improbable-implosions]

This particular mend turned out to be MUCH more complex, involved, and fussy than I really ever expected it to be at the outset. That said, after all the work where I focused on taking my time to get things just so, I found out that I'm quite capable of handling larger projects like this!

First up, here, before starting, my partner Razz and I sat down, and went through our clothes with a careful eye. More and more of her pants in particular were in need of little fixes here and there, and I figured rather than going about it all piecemeal and in no particular order, not accomplishing the fixing of clothes she needs, we put them together into an order of "most wanted fixes" to "least pressing fixes".

Once I had all that info, I settled in with a measuring tape, and got to identifying all the mends that needed to happen. For every piece that was more than, say, a few inches of rip, or of a shape that standard embroidery wouldn't cut it for a fix, I cut out a piece of patch fabric, with the intention of making use of these patches by doing sashiko mends.

Step 1: pin the hem of the patch down, initially hoping to run it through the sewing machine to have a nice hem! Sure, it was kinda fussy doing the quarter inch hems, since I hadn't really done this before, but it's not _too_ bad in hindsight!

Step 2: Realize that the sewing machine foot you have on hand got mixed up with a family member's in a move, and begrudgingly realize you have to re-pin the hemmed patch directly to the jeans being mended. Grumble, grumble! Oh well, at least this light blue thread is going to be really cute on the jeans, so there's that.

Step 3: stitch down the patch to the fabric, blissfully unaware that this big of a patch which interacts with the main seams four times like this is going to be a huge pain later!

Step 4: with some clever use of tape and bumping the laptop brightness, make a tracing of the segaihana pattern onto the dissolvable backing. (I did realize later, mind you, that I could have just used something small and circular to draw this manually, but the tracing worked out just fine, so we take those!)

Step 5: get stitching, following the pattern on the backing! I get about this far before two things happen: first off, the sewing machine foot returned from family-home purgatory, and secondly, I realize that pushing this needle over and over with my bare hands is REALLY wearing out not only the muscles in my hands, but also thoroughly frustrating my skin, in the process.

So, as a little test of the sewing machine, I made this little palm thimble! the loop of thread on the left there loops around my middle finger, and then the denim takes the brunt of pushing the needle, instead of my poor fingies!

So, over the course of a few days, with a LOT of help from the palm thimble (some pieces even getting done on stream, go check out the vods: https://youtu.be/oeytUetT2Z0 and https://youtu.be/u6k-Yr4Vjn0) we get the first (major) panel done! Might not be super visible in these shots, but there is in fact a second piece to be stitched here!

So, after yet more tracing (which took a good bit more fuss, since I had to align it with the previous panel!) we find ourselves at step 6: do the second batch of stitching! Overall, I actually really enjoyed the way this piece came together, the segaihana pattern is super pretty to look at. Plus, I learned a LOT in doing this one, the big thing being, if you're going to have trouble on both sides of a thigh of a pair of jeans, even if the damage is spread evenly on either side, break the patches up along the main seam. Sewing through the many layers of that denim is particularly taxing, especially when I'm struggling to nail the positioning of the stitches to carry on a nice pattern!

[distxrtionist]

✧✧ Responding to all your asks!!!

HEYHEYHEY!! i’ve received so many asks (where did you guys come from??) but i’m a little too busy unpacking and organizing my stuff to respond to each of them separately, so i’ve decided to make a megapost answering all the questions i’ve been sent!! i kinda capitalized and like… proper english-ified nearly every ask cuz it felt more organized for my brain. fair warning: i yap. i yap so, SO much

1. Could I have your reverse 1999 uid? of course!!! glad to have more r1999 fans here, it’s such an underrated game and its story is SOOOO so SO incredibly good, like it’s honestly amazing. i don’t remember if they have different servers but if they do, i’m probably in NA. my uid’s 401530826 :3

2. What are your boundaries on asks?  okok so this question was in the same ask as the one above it but i wanted to make a separate response towards this because i think this is important to go over!! let’s set some boundaries, shall we? honestly everything goes but please don’t vent to me or ask about my personal life. i totally get that people go through bad situations but it’s really not something i’m qualified to help them with or give advice for and hearing about those kinds of things puts me in a bad mood. trust me, i sympathize with those struggles but it’s not something i can help with. and as for questions about my personal life, i just like keeping that kind of stuff away from social media sites! (if you’re a close moot of mine then absolutely none of this applies. go ballistic!!!). also dark blogs. i don’t want to be exposed to that type of content!! i’ll put my DNI in my pinned intro post so it’s easier to see :D i'm not targeting anyone that's sent me an ask or engaged with my posts!!! i've just noticed that a small portion of the people interacting with me are included in my DNI and i wanna let people know that it's a total no for me

3. Will you ever post more of your art? it's a big mmmmmaaaybe. i’ve been super inactive in terms of drawing recently cuz i’ve been relaxing and going out more often. if i do post more art, then i want it to be high quality drawings that i’m proud of. naturally, this means that it takes more time to complete stuff like that :3

4. We should be mutuals just because

sure (why is this big space between the ask and answer there....hh... it's throwing me off)! 5. Book recommendations please again, this question was part of the same ask as the one before it but i yapped so hard that i had to give them separate little sections.. sob.. this is the reality of being a yapper on an online social media platform GOETHE’S FAUST!!!! also consider the Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde, and White Nights by Fyodor Dostoevsky. if you’re into detective fiction, then i’d definitely recommend Arthur Conan Doyle’s Sherlock Holmes books. they’re a classic!!! and if you’ve already read through that, Agatha Christie’s another writer you should check out. my goodness they are SUCH good writers AUUGGHH you should totally consider reading at least one of them!!!! AH and you should definitely look at the new list of books that are to be banned. feel free to ask about this again :D 6. Are you neurodivergent? And if so, in what way?

no, not that I know of!!

7. What’s your enneagram type (if you know)? okok don’t quote me on this cuz i haven’t taken an enneagram quiz or done much research on the topic in a hot second, but i took a quiz with a friend for fun a while back and i believe i’m a 5w6 sp5 (is that right?? are those combos even possible??) thank you all for your asks!! i hope you guys had a nice christmas break :D i’ve saved one specific ask for last, which i’m going to individually reply to because it’s funny and it made me giggle :3 ah i might also post some oc content soon!!

[shining-magically]

so I’ve wondered this since the trailer came out years and years ago and Chloe defended the movie - was the red shoes teaser written by the same team that made the movie? were they forced to market it like that, was that based on an earlier draft, etc?? not sure if you know but you seem like the leading expert!

Sorry, this is gonna be an absolute novel because you know I’m an animation fan and the history and production of Red Shoes and the Seven Dwarfs is SO interesting and insane. Like, Tangled levels of insane. Thanks for calling me an expert, no one else was gonna do it so I just kind of took up the helm lol.

Here’s the low-down... The timeline of the movie’s production is an absolute mess and kind of an extremely wild ride. It was in production for ten years, went through a lot of different crew members, and went through at least two other major versions of the story before landing on the final version.

Since there’s not a ton of info on the movie’s production, a lot of this is pieced together from different interviews and context clues, and also a lot of what I’ve read and what I am quoting has been translated from Korean, sometimes pretty roughly. But yeah.

Here’s the story of why the Red Shoes and the Seven Dwarfs teasers and poster were so, so bad and fatshame-y and the actual movie was so, so good and body-positive. (With pictures and production artwork!)

(This is a beast of a post so I’m putting it under a cut.)

All right, so. After its conception originally as a short story by the South Korean studio Locus Creative in 2009-2010-ish, Red Shoes and the Seven Dwarfs was being worked on and was set to come out in Summer 2017, as evidenced by this poster at the 2015 Cannes Film Festival, featuring a different logo and very different character designs for most of the dwarfs.

In early-mid 2016, the first teaser (in which we see Snow White undress and then two dwarfs recoil in horror at her fatness when she takes her magic shoes off) was released, after the film had kind of been slowly chugging along for 6 or so years. (I am having such trouble pinpointing when the second teaser was released (in which one of the dwarfs basically attacks Snow while she is sleeping to steal her shoes), but I believe it was around the same time.) The teasers didn’t get that much traction because this was a small film from a small indie studio in South Korea.

None of the final actors had been cast yet. At this point in the production, the story was different, one of the many versions that the movie went through. As in the final movie, the dwarfs were actually cursed knights/princes and Snow White switched back and forth between two body types due to her magic shoes, but in this version, the dwarfs needed to steal the shoes from her in order to break their curse (rather than needing “a kiss from the most beautiful woman in the world” like in the final movie).

The weird thing is, I believe they had JUST changed the movie’s story when the teaser came out. I’m almost positive it was released more as a proof of concept than as an actual trailer for the movie. They had just recently combined two separate characters (seen above), a typical pretty, skinny princess character (Snow White) and a cute chubby girl character (’Bonnie’), into one single character that switches back and forth between the two appearances when she wears the magic shoes (also they had just dropped literally half of the movie taking place in the real world, with a magic mirror portal, it was a whole thing). 

They didn’t have the details of this aspect of the new story hammered out yet, and the first pass at presenting Snow’s magically changing body type, was, yeah, not good and super offensive. This was a really inexperienced indie studio making their first film on a low budget, so even the animation and voice acting wasn’t great. I think they just wanted to get SOMETHING out there because it had been 6 years and they wanted to have something to show for it.

But here’s the thing. Despite how the teasers make it seem, this was always supposed to be a movie about body positivity, letting go of appearance-based prejudices, and loving yourself and others for who you are and for who they are, which we see in the final film.

I like to think of our film as a kindhearted one. Our intentions are nice.

- Director Sung-ho Hong

It’s important to keep in mind that this movie was made in South Korea by a 99% Korean crew, and, as I understand it anyway, in Korean culture, ‘fatshaming’ is not really a thing that is seen as overtly offensive. Also, children’s media there seems to have more adult things in it than in the US, which probably accounts for the more risque parts of the teasers. That said, I really believe that at this point in the timeline, the movie was on-track to be bad (or at least not very good) when it was released, and it would have ended up bad IF a few key players hadn’t signed on (which I’ll get to in a moment).

Interestingly, the movie’s producer, Sujin Hwang, said in a 2017 interview:

“[Both teasers] were solely produced to induce curiosity. They’re completely irrelevant to the actual story.”

- Producer Sujin Hwang

I think what she was trying to convey was that neither one is a scene in the actual movie, because while the teasers didn’t reflect the revamped story as it existed in summer 2017 (the time of the interview), they DID reflect the earlier version of the story where the dwarfs wanted her shoes, which is what the story was at the time they were made.

Now that we’re in post-teaser 2016, HERE’S where things start to turn around. After the teasers were released, my guy Disney veteran and native Korean Jin Kim joined the project. He and Red Shoes director Sung-ho Hong had been buddies for about eight years and Sung-ho had been trying to get Jin to come to Seoul and work with him at Locus for a long time, and he finally succeeded.

Jin and his twenty years of Disney experience as an animator and senior designer on films like Tangled, Frozen, Big Hero 6, Zootopia, and Moana, had a HUGE HUGE HUGE influence on the movie. He redesigned almost all the characters, oversaw all the visual development from the moment he signed on, and heavily (HEAVILY) supervised the animation, literally going frame-by-frame through preliminary animations and drawing over them, teaching the inexperienced animators at Locus everything he knew. (Literally almost everyone except him either only had TV experience or had no professional experience because they just gotten out of school.)

From an outsider’s perspective, it really seems as though Jin joining the project (and his gargantuan effort) made the quality SKYROCKET. Not just in character design and animation, but also in things like effects animation, story, etc. After he joined, Locus really started pushing HARD to make a good, high-quality movie, and his influence and experience from being a prominent figure at Disney was absolutely key. The studio also began to really study Disney films and other well-made animated films from other studios to really try and pinpoint what the DNA of a good animated movie really is.

I don’t have any solid evidence, but I’m pretty sure that Tony Bancroft (an animator and the co-director of Mulan) then joined the project because he’s good friends with Jin Kim. He is only credited as the voice director (the movie was recorded in English and the characters were animated to the English dialogue), but I am SURE that he probably also had a pretty big influence on the movie, because like... How could he not? I really really think there was more to his role than his title would have you believe, even though there’s almost no info out there about it.

So now the movie goes through a gigantic metamorphosis. Character designs, visual development, and animation quality are all rapidly improving, the story is tightening, and the themes of the movie (which, again, were always the same and intended to be positive) are being presented in a more sincere way. The movie is becoming the sweet, self-love-encouraging and body-positive movie that was eventually released.

I’m putting a gif from the credits of the final movie here. As we move into 2017, when the giant eruption of backlash occurred, please keep in mind that the story was finalized at this point and that THIS was the movie people were so mad about:

Chloe Grace Moretz accepted the role of Snow White immediately after she read the script and she recorded her lines (I think) in early-ish 2017. Her co-star Sam Claflin also immediately accepted the role of the romantic interest, Merlin, after reading the script and recorded his lines in (I believe) July 2017.

In the summer of 2017, the story and script were more or less the same as in the final movie. Promotional images from that time show that most of dwarfs had been completely redesigned by this point and didn’t have their teaser designs anymore.

They also released a few screenshots that look exactly like the final film. The movie was advertised as coming out in ‘2018′ at this point. Here’s a promo image from 2017 that is MUCH more tactfully worded than the infamous Cannes poster:

So now we’re in summer 2017. The Cannes Film Festival. The movie’s script and story have been basically nailed down, animation is underway, and the Korean film company Finecut is beginning to market and sell the movie to worldwide audiences. They are planning on showing some footage to potential buyers at the festival, and they make a poster to advertise the film there.

Unfortunately, it’s THIS POSTER:

Now here’s where there are some unknowns. By this point, the movie is basically in its final form, which is an adorable, body-positive story about loving people for who they are, loving yourself for who YOU are, and that provides commentary on society’s standards of beauty and how they affect how people are treated/viewed. So why this poster??? All I can really tell is that someone (I think Finecut) really, REALLY messed up and either horribly mistranslated the tagline, or didn’t do enough research to know that this kind of thing is REALLY NOT OKAY in western culture.

The above picture is shared and the internet backlash begins, fueled by tweets from prominent body-positivity activists like Tess Holliday. Even Chloe Grace Moretz speaks out against it, because she of all people KNOWS that that’s not what the movie is about. The internet then finds the old teasers from before the movie was revamped and it makes things worse. Producer Sujin Hwang profusely apologizes and says that that is NOT the message of the movie. Locus pulls the advertising campaign, and takes down the two old teasers.

“Our film, a family comedy, carries a message designed to challenge social prejudices related to standards of physical beauty in society by emphasizing the importance of inner beauty.”

- Producer Sujin Hwang

Voice director Tony Bancroft also tried to explain the situation:

“The truth is the film has a body-positive message as its core theme–it’s the opposite of what reports are saying. The problem is one poorly translated movie poster that has been taken dramatically out of context.” 

- Voice Director Tony Bancroft

And then... There was nothing for a while. The movie didn’t come out in 2018 and was delayed. From what I can tell, I DON’T believe this delay was related to the Cannes backlash. I think it was mostly due to Locus’s limited budget and resources, because as we know, animation is difficult, time-consuming, expensive, and easy to do badly but hard to do well. Also, probably with Jin Kim and Tony Bancroft’s influence, they REALLY wanted to make sure to do a good job with the animation because they now had a great story and they really wanted the movie to be a quality, worldwide hit that would kind of put South Korean feature animation on the map. Just take a look at how nice the final animation was:

The movie was released in South Korea on July 25th, 2019. Unfortunately, the damage was done in the English-speaking markets and it was not released to an English-speaking audience until June 22, 2020, when it was released digitally in the UK. At the time of this post, there is no set US release date, but the distribution rights were recently bought by Lionsgate and the MPAA gave the film an official PG rating.

So who’s to blame? There’s no good answer. You could blame Locus for making those old teasers. You could blame Finecut for the competely tonedeaf Cannes poster. You could even blame cancel culture for raging against the movie based on one poster and two old teaser trailers without researching what the movie was actually about.

All I know is, it’s a damn shame.

[the-bau-quinjet]

Round 2: Tik Tok

Bucky x reader

Part 2 to Round 1: Fruit Snacks

Summary: You enlist Peter to help you prank Steve, Sam, and Bucky.

Warnings: Language!

Word Count: 1795

a/n: Ahh, part 2! Gotta love tik tok. This entire part was inspired by the first Chris Evans tik tok I linked... I linked all the tik toks I referenced, but the descriptions in the fic have been edited a bit to better fit the scene!

Masterlist

"Peter!" You called to him from the other end of the hallway as he entered the elevator. "Hold the door!"

He smiled back at you, holding the doors open as you ran down the hallway.

"Perfect. I need your help." You whispered as the doors closed, never knowing if a super soldier could hear you or not. You had an evil glint in your eyes that clearly said you were scheming.

"Oh, okay. What do you need Ms. L/N?" His eyes were wide, never having seen you this devious before.

"Peter. How many times have I told you to just call me Y/N? You make me feel old, and I am not old." You huffed, stalling for time.

"Right, Y/N. Got it. What do you need my help with?" He asked as the elevator doors opened.

You peaked your head, looking both ways before exiting. You gestured for him to follow you, exiting the compound and walking toward the gate where May was picking him up after a date with Happy.

"I need you to play the video on this flash drive at Tony's next party." You said when you reached the end of the driveway, handing him the mentioned flash drive.

"Why?" He took the device, albeit with a bit of hesitation.

"Because, I'm pranking Steve, Sam, and Bucky. They tried to get me the other day and failed miserably. Honestly, just watching them on edge has been great, but it's time for payback." You smirked, knowing the prank wouldn't do any real harm.

"Oh, Mr. Stark told me about that!" His eyes were wide with recognition. "Good job with the fake crying, I would've loved to see it."

"Well, you can help me get them back if you play that on the projector screen at Tony's next party." You nodded toward the flash drive, wanting to confirm the plan.

"What is it?" Peter looked nervous, unsure if he should get involved.

"Don't worry, it's nothing bad. Just a few tik toks I found from fans. Three for each of them." You smirked, already picturing the blushes. This would really get Steve and Bucky more than Sam, but when you came across the first video you couldn't not do it.

"Alright. I'm in!" He smiled, happy to help you. "But, why can't you just play the video?" He questioned, obviously not well versed in the world of pranks.

"Because, if they see me doing anything out of the ordinary at the party, they'll know something's up. I have to act normal, so it's a surprise." You outline the plan, explaining the need for two people.

"Why me?" He asked again, genuinely curious.

"Because, they won't think I'd go to you for help. They think you'll do anything to get them to stop teasing you, so they won't see it coming."

Peter nodded, understanding your logic. "Wow. You've really thought of everything." He smiled as May pulled up.

"I know. It's going to be great." You smirked, turning and running back inside before anyone could see you.

-

The night of the party, it took everything in you not to wear the world's biggest smirk.

Sam, Bucky, and Steve have been on edge ever since your warning, waiting for you to strike. They were huddled by the bar, appearing deep in conversation.

"Hi boys." You greeted them from behind, causing them to jump at the intrusion.

Sam recovered first, smirking at you. "Y/N. We've got a theory."

You raised an eyebrow, waiting for him to continue.

"You warned us about your next prank, and then planned nothing." You bit your lip, trying to appear deep in thought.

"Interesting theory. What do you have to support it?" You tilted your head to the side, waiting for more of an explanation.

"It's been a week, and you haven't done anything." Steve started, less confident than Sam, but still sounding sure.

"I haven't?" You questioned, enjoying watching them squirm. "You sure?"

Bucky shook his head with a grin. "You're doing it again. Trying to make us paranoid."

Your gave them your sweetest smile, running your hand up and down Bucky's arm. "Whatever you say, dear." You said it with mock reassurance, then walked away grinning.

The three men shared a look, trying not to seem overly paranoid, but failing.

-

You felt eyes on you for the entire party. There was never a minute at least one of them wasn't watching your every move. You were fairly certain they were even keeping tabs on Wanda and Nat, just to make sure you hadn't enlisted their help.

You chatted with Nat, Wanda, and Pepper, danced for a bit, and ate some food, all while ignoring their stares.

Around 9:30, Peter managed to get the video queued up. All eyes were on the projector screen at the sudden noise.

A tik tok started playing, flashing different images of Steve as the music played.

"Hush hush hush, blush blush blush, you are now my big fat crush."

Steve's face grew redder as the video played, turning into a tomato by the end.

"Love me, and hug me, and touch me. And well, fuck me."

Another video immediately started playing, also featuring pictures of Steve.

The caption read "Let me present to you: Steve Rogers Walking" backed by some sexy music.

"When marimba rhythm starts to play, dance with me, make me sway."

Clips of Steve walking, whether it be in uniform from a news clip or in suits from press events, graced the screen.

He was hiding his head in his hands, too embarrassed to even think you could have done this. He had been watching you all night, you couldn't have set up the video.

Bucky and Sam laughed as a third video started to play.

The on screen text read as follows:

"People: how do you sleep at night? Me:"

A girl fell into her bed, swaddled in a blanket covered in pictures of Steve.

The screen flashed black for a few seconds, making everyone think the impromptu display was over. That is, until a new video began playing.

A heavy bass started thumping as a girl appeared on screen, counting down with her fingers along with the sound.

"3, 2, 1."

Sam appeared on screen, a plethora of his most used interview and press clips being played.

He was enjoying the praise, although slightly embarrassed at the video being played in front of all these people.

Another video began playing, showing Sam acting out different Avengers in a game of charades.

"Oh!" It was highly edited to draw attention to his amusing sound effects.

Finally, a clip from an interview Sam did with Steve and Scott came up.

"The problem isn't the kids, the problem is the parents."

You knew he wouldn't be embarrassed by the same things as Steve, so you chose a few random videos you found to call him out for not always thinking before speaking.

The screen flashed black again, transitioning to videos of Bucky.

A clip that had gone viral from Sam's account was edited with new music, resulting in the crowd hearing Bucky say:

"Suck my dick!" Followed by the song "if you gave me a chance, i would take it."

These videos were really just for you. You watched them so many times while looking for the three best ones.

Although, Bucky's wide eyes and rosy cheeks definitely didn't hurt.

The next video began with Sexy Back by Justin Timberlake.

"Take it to the chorus. Come here girl."

Pictures of Bucky flashed across the projector screen, showing off his physique. You don't know where fans find this pictures, but you loved them for it.

The last video of Bucky was a pov someone made about yours and Bucky's relationship. Although the two of you were flirty, nothing had been discussed.

Maybe that's why you chose this one.

You and Bucky were having a fake conversation that went as follows:

Y/N: "Bucky, I like your last name."

Bucky: "Oh thanks, that's sweet."

Then, in sync with the music in the background:

Y/N: "Can I steal it from you?"

Bucky: "Of course, doll."

Y/N: "What'd he sayyyyy?"

The crowd laughed at that one, knowing how the media and fans speculate about your relationship.

Finally, the screen went dark, no more videos lined up to play.

You made your way over to the guys as everyone resumed their normal party activities.

"What a show guys. Really well done. Don't forget to thank your fans." You slow clapped, enjoying their flustered faces.

"How long were you planning that?" Steve, blush just beginning to fade, questioned you.

"I've had the video made for 6 days. I started planning the second you left for the store." You grinned, enjoying the high of a good, harmless prank.

"We've been watching you all night. How did you manage to queue the video?" Sam questioned, eyes narrowed.

"I had help." You shrugged noncommittally. You wouldn't give up Peter's role in the prank unless he wanted you to.

"From? We had eyes on Nat and Wanda." Bucky questioned further, but you just shook your head.

"I can't reveal my sources." You laughed again at their matching looks of annoyance.

Suddenly, something clicked for Bucky.

"So, you chose all of the videos?" He sounded so curious, you couldn't help but fill him in.

"I did. It didn't take long. The internet is full of videos of the three of you. They were pretty fun to look through." You laughed at a few videos you opted to leave out of the montage.

"What's this about you liking my last name then?" Bucky had a new confidence about him with this question.

Having expected this question at some point, you had already thought of how you would answer.

"Well, the fans want what they want. Maybe we should give it to them." You stepped closer as Sam and Steve awkwardly shuffled away.

"You think so, doll?" Bucky relied, hands moving to your waist.

"I don't see why not." You closed the distance, pressing your lips to his in a moment you had been thinking about for months.

You moved together, pulling each other closer even when you were already chest to chest.

Eventually, the sound of a throat clearing caused you to break apart.

Tony was playfully glaring at the two of you.

"L/N, if you ever use my protégé to pull a stunt like that again, at least include some videos of me." He whined.

You laughed at his statement, having expected him to be annoyed at you interrupting his party.

"Can do Stark."

He walked off as you turned back to Bucky, whose mouth was hung open like a fish.

You gave him a questioning look as he sputtered.

"Parker helped you?!"

Permanent tag list:

@averyhotchner

[leonicscorpio]

Batboy Headcanons because I made this for me but you all can enjoy this too if want. (May contain mild NSFW)

Dick:

Has a weird relationship with unwanted gaze and the attention he receives because of his physique. He genuinely likes the attention but he draws the line when people start getting touchy. Just because he's shirtless working out doesn't mean he gave you consent to touch him.

Has good dieting skills but he's in his mid-late 20's and his metabolism has 0 signs of slowing down. He once ate a whole xl bag of M&M's in front of Steph and Babs and both said they wanted to murder him because he won't gain a pound.

Dick has ADHD and I'm sorry if you don't think otherwise. He has hyperactive type ADHD and while he's gotten better at controlling his symptoms he still stims stretching and flexing his arms and shaking his arms.

While not so much in Gotham, Dick is very politically active and volunteers at voter registration and working with organizations with the mission of police demilitarization in Blüdhaven.

Dick is a very sexually driven individual. However, I don't think it's entirely healthy. His ADHD also comes into play with this but Dick just needs to have a release at least twice a day or he'll feel physically sick.

I don't know if you all have seen male gymnasts. But Dick, like the rest of them, has FREAKSISHLY large biceps. Everyone talks about Dick has the best ass in the bat family and while Jason may be larger and stronger, Dick has the best physique.

Dick's apartment is littered with sticky notes in places such as the fridge/in front of his computer. If it's not written down and in a place where he can't ignore it, it's not going to get done.

I'm sorry I know everyone says his birthday is in March but I have to go to the older Nightwing comics and say his Birthday is December 1st. I want you to look me in the eyes and tell me this man doesn't give off Sagittarius energy. You can't. I respect you but you can't look at that and tell me that man isn't a Sagittarius or has super heavy Sag in his birth chart.

Dick's at home doing nothing but chilling? You best believe he's gonna be shirts off, tits out, and rocking some blue flannel PJ's.

Dick is currently the only member of the family asides from Barbara who is regularly attending therapy. And he actively encourages each of his brothers and sisters to go every time.

After his Agent 37 days. He sits down with Jason and talks about having to use a gun and how hard it was. And how having to kill people has affected him. When he had to kill the KGBeast (Agent 37 days he snapped his neck) I headcanon Dick just trauma v*mit*d. Jason hugged him and just consoled him.

It's canon that Dick has anger issues but to me, it's not explored or talked about enough and not a lot of people like to talk about it. Dick is very much the 'if I ignore it it'll go away' type when it comes to his anger and he can brush most insults or harassment off fine enough. But when he breaks, he makes Jason look like a saint. I'm talking slamming you into a wall and screaming in your face angry. He'll be profusely apologetic afterward but still.

Despite popular belief, I don't think he's that bad of a cook. He's just not very experimentative. He can follow a recipe and does look at some guides. But to me, Dick Grayson just is that guy who is like Chicken veggies and rice are a meal that I can cook 4-6 times a week.

Dick has a slight fear of dentists. He doesn't have bad teeth and has good dental health. He just doesn't like the idea of a drill going in his mouth and the few times Bruce has to take him to a dentist he had a panic attack every time.

Everyone lives for the fics where Jason beats the shit out of Tim and everyone is just like lol well Bruce and Dick just forgives him. No. When Dick found out it was Jason who beat Tim to the ground, Dick was literally seething and told Jason "Pick on someone your own size or else I'll make you wish you back in that f'ing coffin."

Dick's favorite foods (some based in Canon*): Milk Chocolate*, Cereal*, Asparagus, Bananas, Banana flavored candy, Hawaiian Pizza* (suffer its canon) Rum, thanksgiving Turkey.

Jason:

He may be the self-diagnosed black sheep (rightfully so) of the family, but Jason does genuinely love spending time with his siblings. Whether it be sharing memes with them on social media or just randomly showing up where they are and abducting them to go get ice cream/coffee/snacks.

He'd probably attempt to harm you if you told him this to his face. But he is the closest acting to Bruce out of all of the family. In terms of mannerisms and inherent warmth and kindness behind a dark façade.

Has two moods: either exceptionally, almost neat-freak levels of clean, or his life is completely falling apart and Jason can't tell you for sure what color his floors are because there's so much stuff scattered about.

Despite their initial hatred of each other, Jason truly feels closest to Tim and Tim is the only person asides from maybe Barbra who he can just talk to without feeling any judgment.

Jason only smokes when he's extremely nervous about an operation or a hit. For those who don't know criminal justice cigarettes are the fastest way to get genetic material on someone. That being said he does still like to smoke occasionally.

Me, plus a lot of people give him this sort of 'Lazarus Rage' as I like to call it. When he's in the heat of a mission or if he's getting upset/angry his vision will get blurred with green, and it feeds on his anger and just gets perpetually harder to contain until he releases it. Jason has gotten much better at controlling it. But as he will tell Tim or Babs, he's "seeing green" which means they need to be careful because Jason could kill.

Everyone says Dick is the mother hen. I see you, I accept you, but let me raise you. Jason came to realize that he died because of his rash decision to go after The Joker alone. If Jason finds any of his siblings out acting alone, or even at the very least without Oracle. Jason WILL forcefully interject himself and ask them what the fuck they think their doing.

I've said it before and I'll say it again. Trying to get close to Jason is hard. He will degrade you can attempt to try to get you to hate him before he lets you in (that cheeky Tsun of him)

He genuinely cares for and supports all of his siblings but has been rough on them needlessly. But if Bruce is being the distant or absent parent he is, you better believe if any of the siblings drops him a text or a call, Jason will be there in a heartbeat.

He's the most physically powerful of the whole Bat Family. You don't understand because of his time in the League, his time with the All-Caste, and having abused Venom for a time, he can snap an arm bone like it's a carrot with little effort.

Everyone in the family likes dogs and goes out of their way to gush over a dog, but Jason takes it to a whole new level. And even when he's masked up dogs just gravitate to Jason.

Can and has grown a beard in a matter of a few days. He usually likes to be clean shaven but some days he likes to wear a beard just to throw everyone off.

One time him, Steph, Tim, and Duke all went to a restaurant (Red Robin lol) and the waitress got his order wrong and his burger had raw tomatoes on it, Jason took the tomatoes off and ate it while looking absolutely miserable. Tim: Jay why did you eat that you didn't have to you know you could have asked the server to fix your burger. Jason, almost in tears: "She works really hard and she tried and I'm a scary dude I don't want to make her upset.." Duke: "... Jason you literally shot at a cop for looking at you funny the other day. But you're afraid of upsetting a waitress?!? I mean ACAB but dude.. "

Jason's happiest big brother moment™ was taking Tim and Damian to the shooting range and watching them both get their first bullseye.

You can't tell me Jason Todd was into the Emo/Screamo/Warped-Tour Scene. His favorite bands/Albums in no particular order, That's the Spirit (Literally the whole album is Jason Themed and I'm gonna die on this hill) & Sempiternal by Bring me the Horizon, Digital Renegade & Everyone's Safe in the Treehouse by I See Stars, The Resistance: Rise of the Runaways by Crown the Empire,

Jason Todd's favorite foods: (Also some based in Canon*) Burgers, Chili Dogs*, Lager-style beers, Freshly baked bread*, Neopolitan ice cream, grilled corn, and Chinese Chicken noodle soup with Duck.

Tim:

This boy *slaps car roof* gives off so much asexual energy. I know New 52 exists but I just feel like Tim is the person who really, REALLY has to trust you and like you before he's sexually active with you.

HYPERFIXATES. You also can't tell me Tim isn't on the spectrum/or has ADHD.

Is the only member of the family who regularly checks up on Jason and talks to him every day via text message. The two are memelords together and love to play pranks on the other members.

While Dick may give the most frequent hugs and Jason gives the tightest, most secure hugs, Tim's hugs are always the warmest and make you just feel good.

Tim's birthday is July 19th. Meaning he's a Cancer. Let that sink in.. no, really let that information just soak. (Note I have nothing against Cancer women, cancer men however....)

All of the bat boys really struggle with talking about their feelings. Dick will manipulate you into changing the subject via twisting it to be about you, Jason will just cut you off or will ignore you, Damian will deflect everything and harass you until you stop, Tim however, Tim is very emotional and while he's very calculated about who he's emotional with, he's not afraid to break down and cry if he trusts you.

Everyone who says he's the level headed Robin haha how's it feel to be WRONG. Tim is at best the least functional college student and at worst a lemming. 'No Tim, coffee isn't a meal I'm going to make you some food or I'm going to stick you in a room with Damian for an hour.' Richard (Dick) John Grayson.

People overblow how addicted to caffeine Tim is. But it's true. Just overblown. You can talk to him before he's had his caffeine just don't expect him to be anything but curt and blunt.

Everyone says Jason would be the worst at texting but it's Tim. He's the master of leaving you on read. While Jason may do it on purpose, Tim is just really bad at texting people and while he always will read your messages he forgets to respond unless it's really funny or really pressing.

Everyone sees Tim as this bean pole super skinny boy Robin. Tim may not be stacked like Dick or a freaking tank like Jason, but Tim is NOT super skinny. He's just as muscular and likes to work out as anyone, but he just is super lean, so he looks a lot bigger and his muscles are more defined because of how thin his skin is. He has those almost disgusting spider veins on his arm. Kind of gross to look at, but he's the dream of any nurse. This means Tim is also the king of accidentally sending/posting thirst traps.

He really is the glue of the Bat Family. Everyone kidnaps Tim for 'Tim Time'.

Dick likes to spar with and in general just hang out with Tim. Tim tried to teach Dick how to skateboard and you'd think the boy who mastered the trapeze would know how to skateboard but you'd be wrong.

Babs and Tim always hang out and talk about computer stuff and Babs knows she can vent to Tim about anything and he won't say a word.

Tim and Steph were a thing for a while and even though they're just friends now, they still are very close and the two have a very deep bond, liking to shop with each other and watch movies,

Cass just loves to be around Tim because of how calming he is but also she knows she can spar with him AND Cass can also skateboard with Tim too.

Even though him and Damian are always fighting, the two still end up being together and have this unspoken bond. They work great together on a team but other than that they still hate each other.

And while everyone still is hesitant around Jason, and despite the fact that Jason literally beat Tim to within an inch of his life, AND would still trigger Tim and taunt him about it. The two have this odd closeness that rivals even him and Steph. Tim will always be the first to bat for Jason. Jason was Tim's Robin. And despite the fact Jason literally beat it into Tim's head to "never meet your heroes." Tim will always be there for Jason should he ask. The two are just close. And it's hard to describe. Bruce has caught Tim and Jason just platonically sleeping next to each other or just doing their own things shoulder to shoulder silently, just enjoying each other's company.

Tim and Duke also have a really positive relationship with one another and the two can stay up all night just talking about anything. Their minds just mesh well together. The two also love to team up and prank the other members of the Batman Family.

Tim's favorite ASMR/Stim? Watching those Tik Toks of people cleaning computers or cleaning phones. The sound of an air duster is like music to his ears and if any of the Bats need their technology cleaned it secretly makes Tim so happy to help them.

Wear his hair up or wear his hair down? It depends! While Tim likes his long hair he also has gotten plenty of compliments for his short hair and likes to style it to suit any occasion.

My one pet-peeve with Tim is that he probably is that person who lets his privilege show from time to time. While he was essentially raised to just sit down, shut up, and be a perfect trophy son to the Drake's. The Drake's were in the same tax bracket as Bruce and Tim definitely was a rich kid. He never means to come across as spoiled, but sometimes Jason will give him harsh looks if Tim just throws away food he doesn't like or says things like Chipotle is 'poor people food'

Tim Drake's favorite foods (you know by now*) Donuts*, Shallot and Artichoke Pizza with Canadian Bacon* (odd choice but it could work) Artichokes in general are his favorite vegetable, Strawberries, and Beef Pho.

Damian:

I headcanon that he has the worst teeth of all of the Bat Boys and he actually has to use lingual braces. (Hence why you can't see his braces)

Canonically is a very good artist and while him and Tim don't get along, Tim introduced Damian to digital art and gave him a photoshop pack and a nice tablet for his birthday one year and Damian loved it so much.

Damian is a capricorn and I will die on this hill. A January capricorn too.

Now you want a good chef? You've got Damian. Having converted to veganism Damian has had to get creative whenever he goes out to eat so he tends to like to eat more home cooked foods. Damian loves all matters of mushrooms, eggplant, and bell peppers.

Damian really struggles the most with his wanting to just be a normal kid. Despite the fact he will dismiss you for it, anytime he gets to spend at Gotham Academy with Jon and the rest of the kids he's naturally the happiest.

Damian LOVES to give gifts. He loves the look on people's faces when they are shocked when they actually get something from Damian.

Despite the fact that he's been traumatized from both his times with Ra's and Talia as well as with Bruce. He just wants Bruce and Talia to be together because he loves them both equally.

While he's the least flexible and least gymnastic of the Robins do let your guard down around him. He is the fastest runner and the guy is rivaled only by Jason in terms of lethality.

So someone (Jason Todd & Duke Thomas) introduced Damian to trap music and ever since anytime his phone gets stolen people will be shocked to find he's listening to some combination of Lil' Yachty, X, Kendrick Lamar, Wiz, and Kodak.

If any random person tries to hug Damian he'll immediately push them away, he'll bitch and moan about just about anyone hugging him other than Bruce & Dick.

Damian loves to go to the beach/the ocean. He just thinks it's so vast and he loves the brineness of the air. Also being half white, quarter middle-eastern and quarter Chinese (Yes everyone forgets Talia is half Chinese) Damian gets DARK. And although he's just okay as a swimmer he still likes bogeyboarding and eventually wants to learn how to surf.

I'm genuinely afraid once Puberty is done with this kid and everyone in the family is. He has Bruce Wayne AND Talia Al-Ghouls genes and those are two SEXY human beings. Damian's gonna grow a beard one day and people aren't going to know how to act.

Damian secretly plays Fortnight and not even Jon knows. He doesn't want to get shamed. He'd rather lose a match and ruin his streaks than deal with the shame of anyone in that family finding out he plays Fortnight.

Damian Wayne's favorite foods (canon*) Cereal*, Avocados, Grilled Tempeh, his mom's Tabbouleh, Mushroom Tacos, and Vegan Sushi rolls, and grape juice.

Duke Thomas

Duke is like, freakishly good with a piano, and he picked it up naturally!

Also everyone says Tim brews the best pot of coffee in the Bat Family, cue to everyone's surprise when Tim was sick one day and couldn't make a pot. Only to find the coffee was freaking amazing. Duke didn't take any credit at first until Alfred let it slip that Duke was the one who brewed the pot.

Duke being the only Meta of the family originally thought he was the double-token because he was a Meta and a black boy. Needless to say his fears were seriously unfounded the moment he got to know everyone.

Although he somewhat fears Jason and his temper initially, he and Jason have one of the closest relationships in the family. If Tim isn't around to bat for Jason, Duke will happily take his spot. The two work on each other's bikes and grew to share the same taste in music.

Duke uses his Photokenetic powers as a force for good and for shenanigans. Jason wants to play a prank on Dick and Damian while Dick is reading Damian a story? Duke will hide Jason in the shadows and will cover up his shadow. Alfred dropped something in the dark? You better believe Duke will find it in 3 seconds or less.

Duke makes it a point to visit his parents every weekend to talk to them. Although they are making some progress in their recoveries, it's still slow going. Eventually, he starts bringing members of the family to see his parents. It started with Cass, then Jason, and the rest followed suit.

Duke loves playing video games with Damian and even helps Damian beat some tougher levels when Damian is about to rage and destroy the console.

Duke is into Magic the Gathering and you cannot tell me otherwise. Duke also is the DM for the Bat Kids annual D&D games. I can and will make a D&D Batfam Headcanons if asked.

Loves Pho just as much as Cass and Tim and they all call it a date night every now and then where they can go to a hole in the wall pho place. It's really a secret between the three of them.

DUKE THOMAS IS THE BEST SWIMMER OF THE BAT BOYS AND I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL. HE JUST THRIVES IN THE WATER.

Finding out his birth father is a supervillain was really tough for him. He went into a shell for a little bit afterwards. Cass and Steph were there to help talk him out of his funk.

Duke Thomas's favorite foods (lol what canon DC hasn't acknowleged our boy in a while..) Chicken Pho, Thai Iced Tea, Papaya, Crab Cakes, Italian Hoagies, his mom's Lemon Poundcake, mint chocolate chip ice cream.

I hope y'all enjoyed! Up next (eventually) will be the Bat Girls!

[shtern-and-art]

Back again with more questions about the au!! XD

And don't worry, we all love your long responses!! The more you say about the au the more interesting it becomes :D

Do Skeppy and Bad need to eat? If so, do they have favourite foods and can they cook?

Does Skeppy have pets of any sort? Does he like animals or have any that he particularly fears? I find the idea of Bad comforting him after a not so nice encounter super cute!

It's pretty obvious they hate the littering teens but what about little kids. Does Bad often lure then deep into the forest to see all the prettiest flowers and cute animals? Has he ever tried to adopt one before realising that wouldn't be a very good idea.

Does Skeppy get defensive about the forrst when he's in the town, like cutting off people who try to say it's a horrible place, or is he good at controlling his emotions?

Do either of them actually need sleep or is it just for fun (or in Bad's case a way to pass time). Does Skeppy ever sneak into the forest depths to nap alongside Bad? Is Skeppy considered short by humans? I assume Bad teases him for being tiny since he's pretty damn tall/large (defending on form) himself.

Also do you have a favourite animal? N who's your favourite to draw in this au?!

Once again, so many questions '>_<. I always look forward to updates for in the dark, all the extra bits are so cool to learn about! I'll probs have even more after a while too haha. Hope you have a great day!! <3

Oh, that's a relief! Gonna ramble freely now :D

And, yes, hello, the questions! (with doodles now!)

1) Food.

Bad doesn't really need rest or nourishment (his health is connected to the forest), but he indulges in both. Sleep, yes, he uses to pass the time (or have dreams, for the heck of it). And the desire to get food or hunt is part of the instincts leftover from all the times he connected to the forest animals for a long time. Desire to eat food though is purely his own, as a person and not a spn creature :D

Back when he was a human, he could cook pretty good, and I bet his favorites were pastries and steak. Nowadays, in the forest, he can eat meat pretty much any day, raw or otherwise. So, after being awake and coherent for long enough time, and reconnecting with himself a bit, Bad will miss eating baked stuff way more than any other food.

And, yes, getting fresh muffins is one of the reasons/leverages Skeppy might try to lure Bad to hang out in the town.

Rat eats and sleeps too, but Bad isn't sure if she does it out of necessity or habit.

Skeppy, oh, he is one of those people who can burn water. In part, the blame goes to his nature - or his lack of control over it - chaos inducing tendencies do not go well with following recipes.

Which is unfortunate, seeing how he does need to eat, and sleep, and so on. Sure, he can last way longer without any of those things than a human would, but he still needs them to survive.

So, his favorite food is pizza, and all home-cooked meals stayed in the past, when Skeppy still lived with his family.

2) Sleep.

So, yes, Skeppy needs to sleep! But I'd say he will not go out to the forest at night for it. Not at first, at least.

First time, he just stayed out for a long time, very far back from the forest's edge. And the forest is so dark, it’s hard to judge the time in it at evening hours… By the time Skeppy noticed that it got very late, the whole journey back would’ve taken him too long to get a good rest at home. But, really, he didn’t have to make it. Nothing in these woods would hurt him, as long as Bad is around, and he’s… here, Bad’s around. And he knows the best moss-covered nooks between the roots, and is very, very warm all the time, and is kinda worrying anyway… Bad knows his woods are safe for Skeppy, but he doesn’t want him going around town at night when Skeppy is distracted and tired.

And this is how the first sleepover happens: with Skeppy declaring he’s stealing Bad’s cape to burrito himself in for the night, and (after the pretend-fight about it), doing so while Bad is still wearing it. It turns out for the better though, because the cape is not that warm, even if cozy, but Bad very much is. Enough to sleep nicely through the night, and dream of the vastness of the forest, the quiet peace of earth underneath, and of the tree branches reaching for the sky, to pass on the wishes tied to them further.

Bad doesn’t sleep that night, just watches over the snoring cape-caterpillar snuggled to his side (in a very not-creepy way, oh no). He puts some old dry leaves in Skeppy’s hair to make fun of him in the morning, and totally doesn’t scare him, when Skeppy half-wakes up early in the morning to a glowing milky white eyes of not really human looking Bad staring right at him.

Next time Skeppy stayed out in the forest for too long, and had to spend the night, he maybe did it almost kinda half consciously on purpose. Because he wasn’t sleeping well, and the loneliness and the stress of life were getting to him a bit, and. He is very much touch starved. And the dreams he had in the forest last time were pretty nice too. Like resting so close to Bad let Skeppy feel what he feels, perhaps? Anyway. It was nice. But he couldn’t just ask for stuff like that right upfront then, so the shame and creativeness lead his way.

At some point he will ask to sleep near Bad upfront, though (:

3) Kids.

Oh, little kids Bad doesn't mind. Also he remembers too much about being human to lure kids away, or think having one at the forest will be a good idea :D I'd say, if some little kid gets away from their parents or a common walking path, Bad could lead them back instead. Send them to chase after a bunny or a pretty butterfly, leading the child back to safety.

Bad never shows himself to the kids, and there is a bit of self-deprecation in this. Just like there is a bit of kindness in the way he treats people, despite always showing how angry and done he is with them.

That is a weird, interesting contradiction Skeppy is very fascinated with.

4) Height.

Skeppy is short by human standards :D And his less human form is even shorter, so Bad absolutely makes fun of him for that. Oh, I'm sorry "lightly teases him, with no mean intent to it at all" (c) Bad, smiling with all his long, sharp teeth

5) Skeppy and the townsfolk.

After knowing Bad for a while, knowing how Bad sees the forest, and how, despite his anger, Bad still can't help but watch out for some people of the town too... Yes, with all that, Skeppy will find himself getting angry at times over people bad-mouthing the forest.

But he can't really talk back here. After all, it was him, and his mischief that reawakened old rumors, old fears, made people more paranoid about the forest than they were before.

Skeppy's little pranks took hold, and him being in town and going around the forest doesn't let people forget how scary and dangerous this place can be.

So yeah, before he lets himself properly call out someone about being mean to the forest, Skeppy gotta face all that. Fun times :D

6) Favorite animal and fav. character to draw.

I think I like to draw Bad more, because he can shapeshift, and the horns/branches are fun to twist around :D But I liked doing Skeppy's reality breaking effects too!

And idk if I can pick one favorite animal :D I just really like snakes, cats, orcas, and all corvids.

Thank you, this ask really made my day! Even if it took me a bit to answer it XD

---

In The Dark - masterpost

[narrators-journal]

Life after the fact

CW: mentions of some nasty stuff related to kids.

First part: Here

For the next few days you were a mess. Between the morning sickness and the guilt of having murdered someone, you were throwing up every bit of food or water you tried to digest, every shadow and small noise in your crappy, dirt cheap apartment at night sent you into a break down, sickened more with fear and the force of your sobs when you got overwhelmed. You never felt like you could relax, everything was nerve-wracking, and especially when you went outside. However, as the weeks passed, you got a handle on your fears. You weren't exactly okay, but you forced yourself to adjust and move on as best you could. As if the paranoia wasn't enough, you also had to deal with being pregnant on your own now. Oh god, I should've just stayed with Illumi! What the hell am I supposed to do about this whole thing?! You thought one night as you sat in your windowless bathroom, curled around the toilet, vomitting from the nerves, nausea, and violent sobbing, I wish I could just go back...apologize and just go back to the way things were. you lamented as you sucked in shakey, cold breaths that burnt your throat. It wasn't like you'd planned this far ahead, your escape attempt was a heat of the moment thing, fuelled by the fear of what might happen after you gave birth and the gut feeling that your partner would doom your child to a life akin to his own, which was definitely not a normal, healthy, or happy one. So, now you were left to suffer the last, stubborn thrashes of winter alone, in a crappy little apartment with walls so thin you could feel the last icy wind of winter when it blew, struggling with pregnancy symptoms and relentless paranoia of what will happen if or when Illumi finds you. After that night, you decided it was best to do what you could to lessen your stress, but that was easier said then done. For one, no matter the steps you took to ensure your safety, taking jobs great distances from where you live, whipping up a fake identity to use for work, limiting how often you went out, you could never fully convince yourself that you were safe from the Zoldyck family. Another thing that stopped you was your financial situation. You managed to nab a bit of cash from the car you'd stolen from the butler, using most of it on a cheap car, but, while a reasonable amount still, you still ended up taking up a job as a maid-for-hire of sorts, and usually your employers would tip you terrifically when they figured out you were pregnant, but with the gas bill, food, and the sketchy amount of rent you had to pay, you had little to nothing left to save for a better place or the baby. Finally, you realized after looking into it at one of your employer's homes during your break, that you were too far along in your pregnancy for termination, since at that point you were somewhere in your fourth month, so that left you with almost no other option than to find a way to give birth. After that, you just settled for having the child at home to avoid the paper trail a doctor's office would need and than leaving the baby at a church. They'll take the kid in and put it into foster care, which is a safer gamble than the Zoldycks. You thought, wiping the beginnings of tears from your eyes as you drove to the day's job. For the remainder of the day, you focused on your work, cleaning up toys, doing and folding laundry, making beds, the usual duties for this particular household, and did your best to not think about your past. That is, until you heard someone knock on the door while you were upstairs mopping the bathroom. The sound instantly sent ice down your spine. It felt as if the world skipped a beat in time with your heart, but at another knock, you took a deep breath and inched towards the distant door. Your heart thundered in your chest so hard that it hurt, but you picked your way down, staying away from the windows and doing your best to move stealthily with the slowly growing bump of your stomach until you could look out of the front door's peep hole. Thank the heavens it was simply your employer, a neatly dressed, glasses clad woman who you'd heard was a lawyer or CEO of some sort, not an assassin. So, just as she gave a third, more impatient knock, you opened the door,             "I'm so sorry ma'am! I couldn't move too quickly to get to the door sooner," you said, not meaning to sound near hysterics, but at least that made you sound super apologetic as the woman huffed in annoyance,             "It's fine, I just had my entire day upheaved." she said, walking in and you swiftly shut the door, not thinking much of the figure you saw standing at the roadside from the corner of your eye, she commonly had other helpers here when you were, it was likely just a gardener or someone to bring in her bags. "First, I burn myself with coffee at 6 am this morning, than I have to drive three damned hours to the airport just to find out my business trip was cancelled because the client decided to cut ties with my work! Ugh, don't get me started on tr-" The woman paused her ranting and hair adjustments suddenly, looking at you with concern and confusion on her dark-skinned face, "Are you alright, dear? Why are you crying?" Her voice was gentle, all annoyance gone when she'd realized you were upset, but it still made you jump and feel a small spark of guilt at the show of vulnerability, something you'd been fighting to repress. But your emotions had been so unpredictable recently, it only made sense that you failed.            "I-I'm sorry, I don't know what's come over me," you sniffed, scrubbing at your tears as she put a reassuring hand on your back and led you to a chair, letting you sit down,            "Don't worry about it, I just thought I was the one to upset you. Are you sure you're alright?" You nodded as she looked you over, looking so parental and compassionate, it made your heart hurt. And just like that, even more tears were falling onto your clothes as a sharp knife of loneliness cut through you. You did your best to at least slow the streams of tears, but seeing this woman you hardly knew be so motherly and understanding reminded you of your own mother, or maybe those times Kikyo had helped you through the beginnings of morning sickness or nausea. Either way, your boss' actions hit a chord and now you were trying not to bawl while she offered you tissues and talked you down from the hormonal extreme.          "I see now, must be the pregnancy talking." she laughed a little, "when I was expecting my eldest, the mood swings never really left, and just about anything would set me off. I remember one time, my husband had made me breakfast and I ended up sobbing over it for a good five minutes while he was just mortified." she said, giving you a comforting smile when you weakly laughed. Finally, when you were past the violent sobs, your boss helped you up and led you to the kitchen so you could splash some water on your face and she could get you some tea to help you relax. Once you were settled down at the table, warm cup of tea between your hands, your boss sat at the table with you and let you take a few sips before asking,           "So, do you have any plans set for the baby?" she asked, and you felt her warm eyes drawing out all of your issues. You started out pretty vague, admitting you weren't really sure of what to do, but that soon led to you going into detail about how you didn't think you'd be keeping the child and probably putting them up for adoption since you couldn't afford them. You told her that you felt so bad for the decision, but you didn't want to raise your child in poverty or worsen their quality of life in general, which your boss understood, laying her dark hand on yours soothingly as you spoke. For the next hour or so, you sat with the woman and she helped you through all of your options. You told her that the father of the child wasn't the best, so she explained good ways to limit contact and how to keep track of every instance of neglect, abuse, or anything of the sort just in case things required lawyers and courts. By the time you'd left her home for the day, you were feeling much better about your situation, and while your plans to put the baby up for adoption hadn't changed, you were much more confident in the steps to go about it. You kept that job for two or three more trips, telling your boss of your plans to stop after that. She understood perfectly and made sure your pay was doubled,           "Pretty soon you'll come up on being six months, you won't be able to do a lot in your third trimester." she pointed out after you refused to accept her money, but that wasn't the only kind thing she did for you. No, on your second to last job with her family she had basically spun you around at the door and herded you out to her car. "I understand you're trying to keep as low a profile as possible, but I can't in good conscious not have that child checked on." she told you as she drove you to a check up, patting your hand and just letting you bawl, but she refused to let you apologize for her helping. In fact, when you thought back on the drive after the appointment, she seemed somewhat sad, but you couldn't exactly place why and on the drive back you didn't want to ask and open an old wound. So, you simply didn't say anything about it and went home that night with knowledge that so far your baby seemed fine, and a tip from your boss to find some time to relax more, "Make sure to destress as best you can, it's good for your mental health and the baby." she advised, as motherly as ever. So, you decided on your drive home to give that advice a shot. At least once. So, after your last job with that family, while spring time was beginning to really settle in outside, leaving a crisp but fresh feeling night in the wake of a lukewarm day, you had borrowed a book from a neighbor and ran yourself a warm bath to hopefully relax in, even if you likely wouldn't be able to get out of it super easily when bedtime rolled around. Despite that fact, sinking into the warm water felt like heaven to your aching back, breasts, and hips. So, you relaxed in the water for a long while, two hours or so, just reading the book and occasionally putting your hand on your belly to feel the baby kick. The only thing that could've made the night better was if you had some scented candles and maybe a shoulder rub, but you were content with settling for this. All around, the night was near perfect, and that was somewhat because you refused to let your anxiety at the little creaks of your floor or the sounds of your neighbors opening their own doors in the ratty old hall destroy your good time. Eventually, you did get out of the cooled water with some work and got dressed in your comfiest clothes before going to bed, feeling rather happy and relaxed, and thus falling asleep rather quickly. That night, you had quite the weird dream. You weren't a stranger to nightmares about Illumi or the Zoldycks, but this dream was much more melancholy. At the start, it was pretty normal, a nonsensical flurry of dream-logic-fuelled, stream of consciousness, but than things got a bit easier to follow, and the dream took a turn from non-sense, to a bittersweet dream of laying in bed with Illumi again, letting him feel your belly and generally being happy with an undertone of 'something's off' to it. When you woke up the next day you were hit with a tsunami of yearning for that scenario, or any scenario that meant you got cuddled and comforted, and didn't feel so crushingly alone. For the twentieth time since the beginning of the month, you thought of returning to the Zoldyck estate, or at least making it easier for your fiance to find you, but than your common sense kicked in to stomp out that fantasy. No! If I go back my life will be more than just miserable boredom and restrictions. It'll become worse than hell! Illumi will be pissed beyond belief and will probably do something extreme to me! Your fearful inner voice had a point, Illumi had already threatened you when you'd asked to go out without him that day, he'd undoubtedly do worse to you for not only trying to run, but staying gone for so long and putting your baby under so much stress. Oh god, what would he do if I miscarry? The mere thought of his reaction was enough to settle the debate. You'd stay gone. You'd put up with the apartment that smelled of wet dogs and smoke, the paper thin walls, the exorbitant rent, you'd leave your baby at a church once they were born, and you'd go off the grid. If you could help it, you'd never go back to face Illumi and his family.

[legionofpotatoes]

I love your art, it is very detailed in a neat way. Was wondering how you got started making it as a source of income? How did you get your first paid work, I'd love some advice on how to get started, if that's ok

Thank you. Of course it's okay, although I doubt I have enough work experience in art to really delve into this. I only went full freelance this year, and had been juggling art as a side hobby until then. If you're still interested in my somewhat narrow perspective, and are okay with my long-winded rambles, I'll give it a shot:

So to answer your question fully, I'll describe how I started and move into personal advice and learnings later on. As a disclaimer, I am a white cishet dude in my late twenties with a moderate cocktail of mental illnesses, but overall I can pass for a functioning adult so a lot I have to say may come laced with privilege I cannot fully identify.

So uhh I began drawing in around 2012? I think? Maybe halfway through 2011? And I mostly made fanart for things I enjoyed and tried to branch out in communities that felt nourishing to my style and interests (I caught a bug for alt posters and enjoyed mainstream movies so I spent a long time on posterspy early on). There were a handful of opportunities that came from there but I could only accept a couple because of primary workplace commitments. Still, it showed that networking in a focused community was definitely a good place to start; I myself have huge trouble committing to social networks and really staying socially active, but I knew it was an essential ingredient in succeeding so I tried to make myself be involved in challenges and art support trains etc. as much as I could.

In parallel to all that I also ran a few third party online stores (redbubble, teepublic) for disposable income and would sometimes, if rarely, hit around $100-150 a month from those sources combined. It is a sort of thing that requires helper accounts on other social media sites to promote it on, because the stores themselves have a huge volume of content that translates into low organic discoverability. Obviously it was never gonna be the way towards financial independence through art, and with community projects being few and far between, I opened private commissions in around uhhh 2017 I think, focusing on offering a few styles I knew I could do well, and sometimes operating in individual fandoms (it was mostly a bioware thing to be frank). But I had to close them back down after a year or so, again because of work-life conflict and how badly it was burning me out. The reason I kept trying to monetize this hobby is because I honestly hated what I did for my main job and wanted to see a way out in some shape or form in the future.

And then in 2020 I had to quit my main job altogether because of *gestures at pandemic* and deal with a mental breakdown from all the wonderful things it did to us and me specifically. I took a short break and decided to give art a shot full-time, and that was around May this year. I was planning on opening up commissions again (and I still am), but a few sudden opportunities that fell in my lap moved that timetable down and now I'm grateful to even be doing something I am getting adequately paid for.

So, with that somewhat limited perspective, here's what I've learned that I'd tell myself if I was just starting out:

1. Being a fan of something can be a shortcut towards effective networking kickoffs. Which are important evidently. If you love something and enjoy making content for it, join communities, settle into a combination of social media websites that feel right for those interests + your body of work + your inner rhythm, and try to play to content discovery as much as your mental health allows you to. Like I said, I know that I myself am incredibly bad at self-motivating to talk to people, so I found that synergizing common interests into fanart - which I enjoyed making anyway - could be a way to give myself a gentle nudge forward and build those bridges leading to community activities, which then net experience and coverage. Sometimes even freelance projects from official avenues. Again; picking the right spaces for what you're after is key. Companies roam twitter, concept art recruiters scour artstation or linkedin etc, instagram can land you private commissions and collab opportunities, so on and so forth. Find your niche and try to kick up dust. However...

2. I do not believe that any social profile can replace a good portfolio. The thing that made an immediate difference to me this year was building a coherent, simple website with my best work front and center and a contact form on top. Every single opportunity I got came from that form (maybe via twitter or instagram initially, but always sealing the decision after going through the website), so I firmly believe that showcasing your skills and portfolio in a visually arresting and user-friendly way is a big priority. I had some reservations about tackling that task but fortunately I had help from a savvy life partner and we slapped it together via wordpress in less than a day. Twitter/whatever social media is prevalent in your target groups is definitely important to get the right eyes on your shit, yes, but those eyes will then look for a second stop where your work and rates are more clear and concise. Simplicity is key imo, I cannot overstate this. So make a cute, simple portfolio!

3. Your skills and rates will grow and change as you do. Let them. Over the years I built several lasting professional relationships from my obsession over mass effect and kept getting opportunities both from bioware and their partner companies, some small and some a bit bigger. A one-off job earlier this year opened an unexpected door to another much larger commitment, and then the work I did there brought some attention from small businesses looking for commercial commissions. These were all incredibly different projects in terms of scope and budget, and I've been tackling them all on a case-by-case basis and slowly coming into my own irt my needs, rates, and SOW thresholds. It is still a work in progress (and a LOT of literal work as well), and very much a thing I struggle with in publicly marketing, which is why I felt a tad underqualified to answer your question in the first place (obviously I did not let that stop me). But what it means for me now is that I am rapidly developing into whatever my "version" of a functioning freelance artist is, and when the conditions for that guy are met, I need to be able to confidently plant myself and operate from that space despite past precedents. Do not let anyone bully you into downpricing what you yourself perceive as legitimate products of personal growth and development. Speaking of which...

4. The shitty challenge of turning envy into inspiration, and paddling outside your comfort zones in full riot gear. it is hard, but realizing that being a miserable, self-hating artist in my early days got me nothing but more misery back was the first real step I took and what truly blew the hinges off. I was just not pleasant to be around, I would badmouth my work all the time, and it all somehow made sense in my broken mind because the validation I sought was purely external and the way I sought it was through eliciting sympathy via self-victimization (even when I made something objectively nice). It all led fucking nowhere. Except perhaps to my own narcissism that I one day managed to identify and start managing. So I started looking at things that made me seethe with envy and calmly deconstruct and figure out their inner workings instead, do studies, and find nuggets of inspiration or discover new ways to approach rendering or building up specific elements. It was an application of analytical diligence to what I wanted to be a purely emotional, esoteric workflow, but that I deep down knew wasn't. Art is a discipline and a skill, and maybe it isn't a straight line, but you gotta find some line to thread nevertheless. Being self-hating was almost an identity I had to break out of, and despite it still being like, 4-5% there? I realize its cause and effect on me, my work, and those around me, so it is with a conscious choice that I gently set it aside when I work and especially when I learn. It won't always stay quiet, but the effort is the difference. Your doors towards accepting true growth and venturing into uncharted territories, art styles, and networking will really open from there. But there's a huge caveat...

5. Toolsets, accessibility, privilege, and all the good things that enable artistic expression and profitability are not given equal to all. you might do all the mental work I mentioned to be ready to rock and roll and learn and draw your way out of anything, but digital art is a fucking money pit that asks almost too much at times. I don't got a good case study here but identifying and ensuring accessibility to the tools you need to do your best work is, like, super important. The ergonomics can improve as you make money and settle into the job, but the basics have to be made available to you. And some of that might not even be under your direct control. That can be anything from pen tablets to software subscriptions to opportunities in hiring sullied by sexism or what have you. You gotta navigate all that through careful networking and money/time management. I don't do a good job of devoting specific slices of time to work/study, and my primary clutch is iPad software which went from a good deal to a nightmare scenario over the years. So all I can say here is do what I didn't; network, invest in a PC/tablet, and pick a software you'll learn that won't burn a hole in your pocket.

6. Be nice to work with? This one is hard to articulate and has landed my own ass in hot water in my early years because of how socially inept I am, but nothing is more worthwhile than being.. like. a good person to work with. That can be anything like meeting deadlines, or sometimes missing them but eloquently articulating why, being generous in early stages, being communicable and not too wordy in your emails, having a good grasp on abstract artistic concepts and how to describe them in simple terms, having a clear, laid out framework of your working rates in commercial and non-commercial projects and sticking to those guns with grace, understanding when you need to say no and saying it well, the works. Just being nice. Sometimes that might mean going headstrong with something you believe in, or simmering down and sucking up to the big man, all relative and adaptive. Part and parcel of the service provision dance that we all have to do in order to make bank. Know your lines here, obviously, and don't like. work for nazis. or uh.. *shudders* exposure. but be nice and empathetic and communicable and word will travel eventually. Skill may be in abundance these days, but good people are most certainly not, and capitalism has a way of bubbling up scarcity. Grim, but uh, them's the breaks.

I know I'm ultimately telling you to like. Have a body of work, make a portfolio, grow, and network. But that's really how I see it for now. And being nice can be a cherry on top that sets you apart, along with the inherent irreplaceable voice of your artwork. I think I rambled on enough, but if there is something specific you need my help with, even if you want to come off anon and talk in private, please feel free.

[1tsnoya]

HI love can you do a HC where the reader is in like a 'team slumber party" w the whole Karasuno vbc bc hONESTLY my heart is so soft for that idea like they're all jus vibing 😭😭 love my babies so much

IMPORTANT | a/n: i believe that i’m shadowbanned so my message history disappeared and my posts will probs slack for a bit >:( pls don’t mind </3 super sorry babes ! hopefully it gets resolved soon

✧･ﾟkarasuno sleepover✧･ﾟ headcanons

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* :･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

↳ it was like 2 in the morning and the gc with the volleyball club was blowing up

↳ everyone was awake and it was just CHAOS

↳ so it made you wonder — wtf would a giant sleepover with us all be like

↳ so u asked just that in the gc

↳ the responses were...

tsuki: no way

yams: cmon it’d be so much fun!!

kageyama: sure

hinata: LETS DO IT

noya: FUCK IT UPPP

tanaka: YUH GET INTO IT

daichi: sounds interesting

tsuki: fine

suga: i’m down!

asahi: me too!

yachi: i’m scared

kiyoko: it’ll be fine yachi

↳ so it was scheduled for friday night at 6pm

↳ and when everyone got there WOW it was so loud there was so much going on

↳ everyone finally calmed down when pizza was ordered hksksjhs

↳ a debate about pineapple on pizza went down

↳ HUGE SUPER MARIO PARTY GAME HOLY SHIT

↳ there were 12 of you (including yourself) and max was 8 players so kiyoko, yachi, asahi, and tanaka sat out

↳ tanaka was yelling at noya and hyping him up though and so was asahi at suga

↳ hinata picked diddy, kageyama picked the goomba, tsuki picked bowser jr, yamaguchi picked shy guy, suga picked yoshi, daichi picked donkey kong HSHSJJSH, and noya picked wario obvi

↳ so. much. SCREAMING

↳ tanaka: “NOYA OHMY- dont fuck this up you need to roll 4- LETS GO BABY LETS GET A-”

↳ he rolled a 4 pure luck and him and tanaka started running around screaming “LETS GOOOOO”

↳ tsuki: “you have 0 stars”

↳ noya: “wtf i’m still gonna win-”

↳ daichi was clueless at first but then really started getting into it

↳ suga was hyping everyone up but was super determined to win

↳ kageyama had the WORST luck. he could have sworn that the game was against him

↳ hinata made fun of him HAA

↳ SUPER CLOSE GAME BETWEEN SUGA AND TSUKISHIMA

↳ tsuki won are u fr?

↳ after another round, tanaka and noya suggested spin the bottle

↳ sigh

↳ they obviously were hoping to kiss kiyoko

↳ she played ONE round. ONE

↳ landed on yachi ofc<3

↳ SO MUCH YELLING WHEN IT WAS JUST A QUICK AND SMALL PECK BETWEEN THEM

↳ yachi was so nervous it was hilarious

↳ OH AND THEN IT LANDED ON TSUKISHIMA AND YAMAGUCHI

↳ tsuki did it like it was NOTHING

↳ cue the screaming. again

↳ after a few more turns, it started getting late so asahi took some uno cards out of his bag

↳ everybody changed into their jammies and sat in a circle

↳ hinata was wearing some old tee from grammar school as his pj shirt and the first and second years FLAMED him

↳ anyways. uno game. right

↳ tell me why daichi got the worst cards every turn

↳ hinata was peeking at other people’s cards

↳ kageyama was pissed off by how many cards he kept having to pick up

↳ so. many. plus 4 cards. from suga

↳ but ohohoh he got some karma

↳ yamaguchi placed down a +4 to give to yachi (he picked it up and was s o s o r r y) then she placed another one down to give to hinata, THEN HE PLACED ANOTHER +4 AND LASTLY TANAKA ADDED 4 AND GAVE IT TO SUGA

↳ 16 fucking cards- he was scared

↳ yamaguchi won <3

↳ and then asahi whipped out another game

↳ family feud....

↳ you can already tell how bad this is gonna get

↳ team #1 consisted of: hinata, kageyama, daichi, yachi, nishinoya

↳ team #2: tsukishima, asahi, suga, kiyoko, tanaka

↳ yamaguchi wanted to be the steve harvey of the night so you helped him keep track of points

↳ in the gc, asahi texted a msg for someone to bring a button

↳ tanaka brought a “nut” one 💀

↳ you placed it in the middle of the table. boom. what could go wrong?

↳ round one began...

↳ tanaka vs daichi

↳ yams: “name something you find sand in after a day at the beach”

↳ the fucking button SLAMMED AGAINST THAT TABLE AND SOUNDED LIKE IT WAS GOING TO BREAK

↳ tanaka: “MY ASS-”

↳ the GIGGLING THAT ESCAPED EVERYONE’S MOUTHS-

↳ daichi was just “:O um. my turn-or?”

↳ noya: did he get the point?

↳ kageyama: he is on the OTHER TEAM

↳ hinata: i guess but it was a good answer..

↳ i’m pretty sure you can already guess what team won

↳ a few more rounds were played and it was like midnight so you put a movie on

↳ tanaka noya and hinata sat in the front, laughing at every single thing going on

↳ kageyama: “hinata if u don’t shut ur FUCKING MOUTH”

↳ yamaguchi: “can you raise the volume?”

↳ tsukishima: “no they just need to shut the fuck up before i go over there and-”

↳ a pillow was thrown...

↳ shit went down..

↳ asahi: “come on guys let’s just watch the movie”

↳ daichi threw a pillow at him

↳ cue the surprised pikachu face @ daichi

↳ yachi was sCared

↳ so her, kiyoko, and you snuck off to the bathroom while chaos erupted between the boys

↳ kiyoko: “okay when they all fall asleep, i want to mess with them”

↳ yachi: “are you sure that they won’t kill us-?”

↳ OHOHOHO a plan was devised

↳ you three waited until the screaming died down a bit and then walked out

↳ feathers everywhere, uno cards all over the floor, and the nut button was smashed...

↳ wtf happened you left to the bathroom for like 6 minutes-

↳ “ummm...”

↳ “so...”

↳ “bed..time?”

↳ it was 1:30 in the morning and i’m sure you can already tell who was wide awake

↳ daichi, kageyama, asahi, yamaguchi, and tsukishima were trying to get ready to sleep

↳ you and the girls were trying to stay awake for your little plan

↳ hinata, noya, tanaka, and suga were just... wired

↳ yeah did suga surprise u? nope not me. that boy is chaotic at sleepovers don’t @ me

↳ they set up a smash game (while the others were sleeping) so tsuki woke back up to beat everyones ass-

↳ it started getting loud until daichi got up like - “shut✨the fuck✨up✨”

↳ so everyone quieted down HSJSHS

↳ you joined in on the game and teams were formed

↳ you and tsuki vs hinata, noya, and suga

↳ tsuki: “just pls don’t fuck this up-”

↳ you and him won😫obvi

↳ at the end when it was only tsuki and suga, he kept RUNNING AWAY FROM HIM

↳ suga was just — :p u cant catch me

↳ and when he did.. yikes..

↳ everyone eventually fell asleep

↳ except you, kiyoko, and yachi

↳ kageyama grumbles in his sleep, daichi sleeps like a serial killer, suga was just-he looked like an angel, asahi was lowkey breathing loud, noya and tanaka were SPOONING, hinata kicks in his sleep, tsuki sleeps with his headphones in?? and yamaguchi turns around every second

↳ it was time for the plan nehehehe

↳ kiyoko put makeup on kageyama, tanaka, and asahi

↳ yachi started doodling on daichi’s, noya’s, and yamaguchi’s faces

↳ you put an alarm set to go off in the morning and blast ‘deepthroat’ by cupcakke on tsuki’s phone ***yes he still had his headphones in

↳ and you all put some creepy clown doll right next to hinata’s face so that it could be the first thing he wakes up to

↳ next thing you know it’s 7AM and all you hear is “hUMPME FUCK ME-”

↳ tsuki was the first one awake and was already grumpy

↳ he thought that it was noya and tanaka’s idea to mess with him so he like shoved them awake

↳ “cupcakke? really?” and then he stopped to look at their faces

↳ yachi drew some fucked up shit on noya’s face and tanaka was wearing red lipstick with pink eyeshadow

↳ “it’s too early for this...” HE LEFT TO THE BATHROOM LMFAO

↳ oh god and then everyone woke up

↳ you and the girls were fake sleeping and listening to it all go down

↳ breakfast was.. interesting

↳ hinata was traumatized from that clown incident (he scream sounded like it came from his little sister) the boys were trying to rub off their makeup and it was smudged all over their faces, and the other boys were just ... trying to ignore the drawings on them

↳ ofc yachi drew a mustache on daichi

↳ oh and noya was trying to play the drawings off as tattoos😔

↳ you don’t even wanna know about breakfast-

↳ everyone agreed on pancakes and well...

↳ batter was everywhere and the smoke detector went off

[the-hate-keeps-me-warm]

kisses and cuddles

wooooooooo time for some more fluffy shit yall i loved making this so much this sorta relted to my weed garden fic but you dont need to read it (be cool tho)

Ruby was sitting in the cafeteria with Oscar and penny she was too tired to pay attention to what the two were talking about penny sitting across from her and Oscar was excitedly talking about something while Oscar liens looking interested she’s unsure how he’s so put together they were both up late hanging out dreading comics and it’s only 7 am she leaned on Oscar and closed her eyes hoping to get a little more sleep before She had to do missions she had a relatively short one today only a search and destroy so maybe she could get home fast and take a nap Oscar nudged her shoulder and she lifted her head “hey don’t fall asleep if you don’t eat you’ll be grumpy” he says she fakes a pout and starts eating the gross cafeteria food she assumed that atlas food would be good sense it’s so many rich folks but no she’s actually had  better tasting mres or maybe she was just getting spoiled eating Oscar and rens cooking “ruby why are you so tired did you have trouble sleeping” penny says drawing circles on the table with her finger “no me and Oscar were up late last night and I only slept like three hours“ penny frowns “while I am happy you and Oscar are spending time together you require at least 6 hours of sleep for maximum field efficiency” ruby just nods “so why don’t you seem tired Oscar you couldn’t of slept anymore than I did” she says with a yawn he shrugs and says  “I guess I’m used to it I had to wake up early back home so I always didn’t get a bunch of sleep” penny raises a finger “actually according to my scans  Oscars brain is only running at 89% efficiency and his hear rate is faster from his normal 48 beats per minute to to 51 it is likely that he simply better at hiding his tiredness” Oscar slumps “penny do have everyone’s heart rates memorized” he says exasperated “yes I also have all of your medical charts on file and criminal records why” he raises a brow “criminal record?” Penny nods “yes several of your team have criminal records qrow having the longest with 22 counts of public intoxication as well as 3 of public indecency and” ruby raises her hands “trust me you don’t wanna know the rest they had to make a new law for one of the things he did but who else has charges?” she tries to wake herself with conversation and it sorta works she also learns some new and unsettling things about her friends but eventually breakfast ends and she starts to get her gear ready she’s loading rounds into one of crescent roses magazine when someone knocks on the door to her locker room “it’s open” she calls out and incomes  Oscar he’s holding a small Tupperware box and a small metal tumbler “hey I wanted to give this to you before you go” he says with a sheepish grin he sets the box next to her and hands her the tumbler it’s warm and smells good “it’s coffee, don’t worry I added way too much sugar for you and the other thing is a surprise you said you don’t eat a lot on missions so I made it for you it’s a bit of an experiment so tell me if it’s bad” she’s grinning ear to ear and stands up from her weapon bench and hugs him “you are the best and I’m sure it’ll be great” she gives him a kiss on the cheek she’s been slowly trying to work her way up to kissing him on the lips but nose and cheek kisses were enough for her he smiles and his cheeks get all rosey  and he hugs her back and says “be careful ok sorry I know you can take care of yourself but just you know“ she squeezes him a little “yeah don’t worry I know  I’ll be careful and when I get back we are so taking a nap mister I’m not that tired” he giggles and looks up at her with a smile  “you won’t hear me complain and uh before you go could I uh kiss you like um on the lips” he says nervously she leans down pressing her forehead to his and smiles she smells his breath it smells like chocolate and coffee she feels her cheeks heat up to match his and says “I’ve been wanting to do that for a while now are you sure you want to ” he nods his head wordlessly she takes his hand and gently presses her lips to his its short and maybe a little clumsy but it makes her heart soar when she breaks the kiss Oscars breath shakes slightly  and a little panic starts to fill her did she mess it up did he hate it and then he smiles and it all fades away “that was really nice” he says rubbing her knuckle with his thumb then there’s a knock on the door frame she looks up and weiss and Blake are standing there weiss looks annoyed and Blake is grinning “time to go ruby morning Oscar” wiess says already turning to walk away ruby quickly gathers crescent rose and Oscars gifts and says “bye Oscar I’ll be careful byeee” and dashed out the door behind the others Blake nudges her shoulder “your lucky I made weiss wait  ,god you two are adorable” ruby squeaks “will you stop spying on us”  “we weren’t spying you two dolts left the door open” weiss says annoyed 

 The mission was boring as she thought it was gonna be how normal soldiers couldn’t handle this she’ll never know on the airship ride home she opens   the box Oscar gave to her a note on top says “have a great day and stay safe” she smiles at the note and sticks it in her ammo pocket  it looks like a brownie is some kind and yang leans over and says “where did you get that”

“Oscar made it for me” she says taking it out of the container it smells like a peanut butter protein bar “ooo come on share with me pleassss” yang says putting her hands together “ugh your lucky I’m a good sister” she breaks off a small piece and hands it to yang and takes a bite of her own and it’s amazing it Taste like a peanut butter brownie but somehow better it’s somehow not dried out or crumbly yang seems to have a similar opinion “god if you don’t marry Oscar i will his food is too good”yang says with a laugh  she kicks yang in the leg “I know right I can barely eat the cafeteria food anymore” her and yang chat a bit about food until they finally land Oscar is standing on the landing pad waiting for her she bounce on her heels excitedly despite how tired she is when the door finally opens she rushes out to hug him “how did it go” he asks wrapping his arms around her shoulders “oh it was easy but soooo boring I don’t know why they asked us to do it” she says leaning into him he chuckles “well I’m glad it wasn’t dangerous at least did you like it” he asks sheepishly she puts her head on his “yeees brothers it was great what was it” he unwraps his arms and looks at her “there’s no name for it yet but it’s kinda like a protein brownie was it too grainy or anything what about the after taste” he asks “I didn't even realize it was supposed to be healthy” she puts her hands on his shoulders “Oscar I’m gonna need more of that” he smiles “happy to make some more tonight” he says proudly yang walks past and ruffles his hair “make sure to make enough for me too kiddo” and walks off “how about that nap ruby my teams still on mission so we should have some time” he says taking her hand “yes please” 

They walk back to team alpns dorm room after ruby changes into something more casual Oscar was already wearing his normal clothing he sits on his bed and smiles “I’m gonna get to have two naps today” she sits down next to him and throws her arm around him "you and your team  sure like your naps huh" he smiles as they lie back on his bed "honestly who doesn't like naps I never use to be a huge cuddler but it’s nice to have someone close to you, you know” they lie back Oscar resting his head on rubies shoulder “well I do  wish my team took naps together sometimes yang is a big cuddler too but Weiss  doesn’t like being warm and Blake can’t sit still even so less than you” he snorts as he takes her hand running his thumbs along her knuckles  “well I’m sure the others wouldn’t mind you joining our naps if have to ask but i'll warn you ren sits up in his sleep  Jaune snores and i talk in my sleep” she raises an eyebrow “you didn't last time” she says “that's cause we were smoking  but if i take a nap or if im really tired you can actually talk and I'll talk back” she grins “well what do you talk about”  he rests his head on her chest “usually about my aunt or all yall but Nora has told me i say lots of stuff about you if i'm asked” he says his cheeks getting just a tiny bit rosy she grins and plants a kiss on his nose “well i hope i get the chance to ask but i'll probably fall asleep first im super tired” she rolls over and wraps herself around him oscar adjusting to lay on her arm pulling a blanket over them "well if you can get me to talk I'll answer any question just nothing to embarrassing please" he says  “i would like to know what you have to say tho so maybe i'll try to hold out just a bit longer” she says closing her eyes as oscar lets out his relaxed sigh about half of Oscars communication was nonverbal she liked to mentally catalog the things he does when he relaxes he lets out a long almost high pitched sigh it makes her happy to hear that and it helps her relax her thoughts starts to get fuzzy as sleep takes her she wakes up a few hours later laying on her back oscar laying on top of her them both having wrapped around each other she hears quiet murmurs  coming from him to quiet to understand "Oscar are you still asleep" she whispers no response "Oscar are you comfy" he nods his head "of course I'm comfy I'm cuddling with ruby" she snickers he was definitely still asleep "who's the coolest person you know" she she's "ruby for sure she's so good at fighting and everyone trusts her I wish I was more like her" she runs her hand through his hair "how do you feel about ruby " she asked "I'm in love with her she makes me feel strong and weak at the same time when she's with me I feel like I'm safe and that we could do anything together i want to be with her forever" she's crying now "oh shit I didn't expect him to be that honest" she thinks as tears run down her face "I love you too Oscar"     she kisses the top of his head “you know i never used to want like romantic stuff and all the fluffy garbage i just wanted to be a huntress and fight grim stuff like that but you  make me want that stuff i wanna take you on dates and like hold your hand and stuff there are a bunch of things i wanna do like” she pauses resting her head on his “i forgot you were asleep for a second i'm starting to embarrass myself i do love you tho i dont know when your supposed to say that we've only been i guess dating for what 2 and a half weeks my dad always joked that huntsmen relationships move really fast nothing like holy shit we might die to move a relationship forward right but you make me feel like i don't know amazing and I love being with you you make all my worries disappear even if it's only for a little bit and i'm rambling and your not talking back” oscar lifts his head “its cause im awake and i love it when you ramble” she feels her face light on fire “w-what when did you wake up” he hums happily “around we might die  i think it was nice that stuff you said you can ramble longer if you want what that new gun you saw in that magazine” she smiles “it's a roller delayed blowback sniper rifle its a smaller caliber than crescent rose but it has a longer effective range because of the way the bore is shaped i prefer bolt actions to semi automatics for a long range rifle semi autos have there merits and stuff it's a lot lighter than crescent rose as well on account of it not also being a giant scythe you know i was thinking about carrying a pistol too crescent rose is great but shes heavy and she's also really hard to conceal  even when shes folded speaking of i need to clean her gears a bunch of dust got in them today you said you wanted to learn weapon maintenance i could teach you today if you want” “sure i can learn there's a lot of things oz knows but it's like a big library without a librarian its all jumbled up” she scratches the back of his neck “well i do not understand the dewey decimal system but i'm happy to help” they both giggle at her joke ruby keeps rambling until the rest of team alpn return 

Oscar is walking ruby back to her dorm they come to her door and they turn to face each other and oscar rubs his hands together “so ruby uh I got permission with ironwood to leave school grounds as long as someone's with me so I was wondering if you’d like to maybe go out like on a date” she smiles and puts her arms around his shoulders “sounds amazing sweetie I’m free this weekend where do you want to go” he blushes and says “well I actually have something in mind but I wanna keep it a surprise if that’s ok” she kisses him on the cheek “of course casual clothes or should i dress nice” he shakes his head “i mean it's really up to you but were not going somewhere fancy just a place I think you'll like" she smiles and kisses his nose and he leans up a little so there lips are level "can i kiss you again" he asks just above a whisper her pressing her lips gently against his is her answer they  hold the kiss for a few moments Oscars hands drifting to ruby's waist when they separate  she says "i think we're getting pretty good at that" Oscar smiles avoiding her eyes "yeah um It's certainly enjoyable" they break the hug "I'll see you in the morning I'll make that stuff you like ok" he says "yes awesome you're the best Oscar good night" she says as she slips into her from her teammates giving her knowing smirks 

[the-acid-pear]

I did my homework and i did my chores, time to tackle on the third book of this series, Son of Ogre

Chapter 1

Okay but the fuck is Baki planning to do if he stops fighting? That's literally all he has, he's not smart

WOOH THATS A BIT REALISTIC

PREHISTORIC ELEPHANT?!

King just went to have a snack. Also FUCK does that meat look tasty FUCKKK

This baby so cute 🥺

I'm so glad Yuji is doing stupid hilarious shit again it had been a while

Congrats on Baki for that mantis

Chapter 2

Who tf is this kid?

Poor kid lmao, i assume he will meet Baki

Look at my boyyy

HSTSRFAYDF DON'T CALL HIM A MANLET

Imagine Baki actually kills this kid HSJDYSSHCBT

Third comment with a ton of likes is "we do not condone child violence. We do, however, find it hilarious"

Chapter 3

AH SHUT UPPP KIDDO

But i like Baki memeing a round a lil

Chapter 4

🥺🥺 that's so sweet...

HELLOOOO STRYDUM MY GOD YOUR TITS GOT FATTER SIR 😳😳

Yujiro is such a fucking threat to society lmao

I love seeing Baki with his eyes open, he's looking more like his old self

Oh, shadow boxing incoming, alright

Chapter 5

Yuri? 🥺 /j

THE RETURN OF IRON MICHAEL?!

Chapter 6

I love how there's our silly little mains after every cover LUV em <33

Baki just dissociating his ass out and using it on his favor, the king

Why is Baki eating sour prunes aren't those meant to be sweet?

We all salivating

Chapter 7

Love to see there are even more swears there now

I can put my face next to my foot too tho

FAGDRJSEHARD YUJIRO CAN BEAT THE CANCER HOW ICONIC 😍

Also i would LOVE to see Yuji fight an Orca

WHAT?!

I love how everyone in the comments is calling out Rumina for not seeing issue going down to a dark hidden basement with a shirtless man older than him

Chapter 8

"piggy back me" USHSYFLFUDSY

This fight is going to be good

Chapter 9

Imagine Baki dies right here right know against an imaginary mantis lmao

Okay Baki getting damaged makes sense but the WALL?

Baki's dead (GOD IT HAS BEEN SO LONG SINCE I HAVE SAID THAT)

Ffs it's true Baki COULD create himself a stand 😰

Chapter 10

OH FUCK IT'S TRUE

Chapter 11

This fight is so boring i had to take a 6 hour break

Baki just can't win against nature eh

This reminds me of Garland pulling a suplex on that Anaconda

Chapter 12

I can't wait for the main cast to ACTUALLY appear, instead of just, you know, them in the covers

This fight is slow but cool but slow

To fight a mantis you must think like a mantis 😎

Though it's true in this manga you will most likely win if you steal your opponent techniques so

Chapter 13

I MISS IGARI FUCKKK

This is so dumb i luv it

That mantis be swearing lmao

Love it when Baki goes full Yujiro

Chapter 14

TOBA...

Holy fuck do mantis fly?

Secret Chapter?

Is this how Yujiro got born?

Idk girl i would have killed him if i was you

WHAT.

I KNOW THOSE FROGS THEY ARE FROM PUERTO RICO I THINK

I might just be sleepy but this is so confusing

AKSHSKGSKSGSJSG JUST KILL THE BABY IT AINT THAT HARD

Chapter 15

GAIA...

Why is he like this?

Is "he" with us right now?

...gotta admit that IS true...

I love Strydum sksgwhwg

Yujiro really went XD

I don't think my man Arun in the comments is aware how gay what he said is, though maybe I'm wrong

Chapter 16

GOD THESE FUCKING COVERS MAKING ME SO NOSTALGIC, LOOK AT SPEC!

ANIME KENNEDY?!

I can't believe Bush is dead

AN ASIAN BOY HAS JUST KIDNAPPED THE PRESIDENT...

8 of January? My god he's a Capricorn

I'm sorry, what?

LAHQIGWKQFWKSFWIWG 😭😭

I love Baki so much, THIS IS THE KID THAT I MISSED SO MUCH

This explains why Baki was in prison clothes in the anime teaser

Chapter 17

BIG NUMBER

That one mf like 😐

Glad Baki is 18 now at least 😌

Love to see Oliva back

Chapter 18

This page not even bothering to charge the pages anymore

I'm sure there were better ways to go to jail, well, actually, no, but still

Toba used to just chew that off

Baki did that mantis hit you in the head too hard?

I. I watched way too many prison movies and shows. I don't like seeing someone as young and pretty as Baki in such a place. I rlly don't.

Chapter 19

Yanagi baby i miss you...

IRON MICHAEL?!

Mfkhsjsys 😳🥴

Eh got my hopes too high

CHE BAKI PIBE... LA PUTA MADRE NI ACA ME ESCAPO DE MIS COMPATRIOTAS

I hope he swears too i want to see a boludo o pelotudo PLEASE

I mean para pelotudos lo veo a Yujiro todo el tiempo pero igual JSGWKEGWG me pone bien argento ver al Che carajo

Chapter 20

HE SAID BOLUDO SUAHWKWGAKSGSKSGSKGD

I can't take this omfg new fav I'm sorry Doppo but he just said boludo 😭

Pendejo is more used as pibe here but i will let it pass bc idk the lingo in Cuba and he spent some time there so

Why don't i speak like this too ffs? All i do is say eh and call it a day

He's cocky enough to call anybody any age pibe so I'll let that pass too

Por favor no lo hagas che sksgwj

Chapter 21

Che, pibe, it's a good day to die...

Chapter 22

GSHAGSTSG he should have said "no boludo"

I'm falling in love with this boludo myself

That's talented and brutal

OH RIGHT YOU LOSE YOUR BALANCE WHEN YOU DONT HAVE THAT

Chapter 23

Hm that's, cringe

YESSS HE SAID PELOTUDO

OAHWLGWKQFSKSGSJS SIII ROMPELO TODO CHE, ROMPELO TODO POR DECIRTE YANKEE KSGSSJGS

Honestly i too get pissed off when called American or European, though i won't throw shit to Baki, he's some random 18 yo japanese boy, no way he would recognize latinoamerican lingo lmao

King shit Baki boy

Chapter 24

Oh that's why he's called Jun Guevara, that's fair

I like how they are mixing a bit of truth and a bit of lie it's fun at least

Chapter 25

I like how they are drawing nipples now, occasionally

I can't wait for Viêt to complain about propaganda in the comments

OH SHIT

😳 :Y

He's sooo nice 😍

Chapter 26

Only three? You mean the third is... 👁️👁️

HAHA YEAH YUJI-CHAN <3

I can't believe he works for the USA I'm crying and shaking rn

What a progressive manga, the three strongest and most dangerous men and none of them are white 😍

GET HIS ASS BAKI

Chapter 27

Why is this guy sweating sm?

LDYDYSUGFUDT BAKI PLS

I like how the only time Baki was willing to kill a person was when he thought Sikorsky had hurt his girl

Chapter 28

I feel like Ian will die

Man i love how Baki is drawn in this book

Ffs i called it, i have watched way too many prison things to know how shit goes down

I have seen these three before in fanart but I'm curious to see what they can do

Chapter 29

Their faces remind me of Doyle

OH I CANT WAIT TO SEE EM IN THE ANIME

ASSHOLE DON'T CALL ME STUPID 😢💔

I'm gonna struggle to tell em apart but i think I'll manage

Okay I'm not the only one who thinks they look like Doyle, fair

Chapter 30

The mouth vs Yujiro when?

Someone mentioned the have the same vibe as the dudes that worked with Gaia and like 👁️👁️

Chapter 31

Lmao someone in the comments recommended the same thing

These three must be great at sex (sorry)

KSHALDHDKD NEW FAV COMMENT: "go to Japan and look for the word "defeat". That way you won't feel cocky anymore"

Chapter 32

Hehe hello Junnn~

KSHAKDHKWGS

La luna

Chapter 33

LOS TRES...

Okay that's funny, hocico instead of mouth (hocico is used for animal mouths)

I'm so glad i know Spanish

The two things that drive me insane and make me ramble are Doppo's beauty and this stupid argentinian

OSHSKWGSKSG

Chapter 34

Imagine he's doing that illusion thing Dorian did

With his own blood, that's so cool...

Hoho...!

I did that once when i had a terrible nose bleed, didn't go well

Chapter 35

This book is fucking boring NGL

"now that you got no more urine left in you"

AH.

GAHDYR LMAO

Chapter 36

HO THAT TITLE, PLEEEASE I NEED SOMETHING, ANYTHING, TO HAPPEN

HHH he kinda cute...

Oww :(

JDJSJFRGAJ

God piantao is an old word i had never heard it before

AND he took a piss.

LOCO NO SEAS HOMOFÓBICO NINGUNA MINA ACA ES MEJOR QUE ESTE PIBITO TE LO ASEGURO SKSGSKGSJAAGS

Se me cayó un ídolo y yo que le quería dar 😔

ÑSHWQLSGOSGDKW

Let's see if he lied to Baki about just liking eh /j

Chapter 37

I luv Oliva lol

AJSGSKSLAGHS BAKI SNAPPED

I too wonder where the fuck Kozue is

Chapter 38

LSHSLDGSLSGSIEG

He is jealous of what you two have, it's normal, el Che just rejected his love after all ;/

Oliva is a king

OH A HANKERCHIEF I THOUGHT THAT WAS UNDERWEAR SHSGS-

Oh shit Oliva is like 45?! He looked so young

Te fuiste a la mierda, Che, el chabón estaba siendo re bueno con vos

Baki is just dead

Chapter 39

I love how realistic Che's fear is, he's rather smart, though not this time

POOR GUY AJSGSWJW

I didn't realize Che said "what more, it may be a woman!" but to be fair they ARE in jail so

Chapter 40

I'm feeling kinda bad for him ngl

I feel happy for him tho 🥺

Bruh they added one page after the ending of some naked anime girl tf 😐

Chapter 41

These prisoners having fun is kinda sweet

YO INSANE

Bitches be complaining about Maria's looks are just jealous 🥰

Chapter 42

Damn she lorge

He loves fighting naked eh

Only valid person is the one saying Oliva deserves better treatment which tbh true

Chapter 43

Fun fact i wear my jacket like El Che too, unless it's too cold

El che with the hair lose is so cute bro,,,

Something something fingering joke

Sikorski could fold a coin too

I bet the bandana will break

Chapter 44

I would have just fallen on top of him, how is he gonna counter that, eh?

Oh that super fun to know!

Oh the good ol dirty technique, i have seen this one before!

Chapter 45

NOOO MARIA DON'T DO THIS TO HIM

This fight is super cool tho i love these two characters

Chapter 46

They just keep changing the rules i think Itagaki is just flexing at this point

LAAOSFKAGSKAGSKAF???

Baki wants his protagonism back

I'm getting pissed off they keep putting semi naked underaged girls at the end of every chapter 😐

Chapter 47

Bruh just realized, the mouth got so hyped as this new cool villain and they died in their first appearance 😭

His damn bandana...

[antiloreolympus]

12 Anti LO Asks

1. STOP why are those two panels of her trying to not be a bringer of death literally two obviously different pink hues???? hello??? does this comic not have quality control??

2.Alrighty, read the recent chapter (not the fast pass but the one before) and I have questions

So like, All the side characters are back now I guess? (Also I totally forgot that Artemis went to visit Hermes - how many chapters ago was that even?)

Did... Thanatos and Daphne get together / move in together off screen?? Why is there random narration all of a sudden when LO has Never had it before? (At least that I can remember) - and who's narrating?? Why does one of the side characters need to die? Am I supposed to be invested after RS ignored them for like 20 chapters? (At least its a break from the super slow burn of HxP)

Is this going to effect the overarching plot at all? Do you think RS is gonna try and flip the myths again? (Eros + Psyche, Echo + Narcissus, Apollo + Daphne, etc. Thanatos?)

Also, yeah whats been going on with Hera since she had that Kronos premonition? Why does Daphne sound so happy / smug about Demeters probable heart attack when she eventually finds out about Persephone being in the underworld with Hades? (Whenever RS gets to that).

And what happened to Zeus being all pissy with Persephone and the Trial?

Why are there so many unconnected plot threads? I cant keep up with them all! (It also doesn't help that RS just expects readers to remember all this info after ignoring it - like Artemis going to visit Hermes).

3. If we're being completely blunt and honest here... There's no happy ending for LO. Even if RS ends it on LO Hades and Persephone being "happily" married, you can tell by his past actions that LO Hades will just keep "switching out" for "newer models", so to speak. He'll keep getting mistresses. He'll keep financially manipulating women until they get away from him (one way or another).

4. ok but as a character designer? red and pink are KNOWN CLASHERS. there's a reason ariel's marketing is all in a green/teal/purple gown now instead of the pink one she wears in the movie. pink + red, especially a very saturated, blue-undertoned pink like persephone is, are a HUGE ARTISTIC NO-NO. she needs to get a refund from whatever color theory teacher she had because they l i e d to her.

5. ok but. how cool would it have been if it was trans persephone, and kore was her stand-in (similar to a deadname, but not quite the same) until she decided on her official new name, persephone? if smythe wanted a name-change so bad she could have done so much cooler, better stuff. mtf persephone would make 'becoming a queen/princess' SO much more significant. girl you were already an heiress to begin with stfu.

6. i say this as a transgender man: sometimes smythe's art legit looks like rcdart's stuff. the  weird racial features, the huge hips and tits, the dorito-men? she's cis rcdart.

7. when its the korean imported stuff the webtoons team has to market it themselves and do as best as they can, off the translations, but western made stuff like LO has the creators all input on the marketing (duh, they made the images and banners) so the "Hell" connection is very much Rachel's doing, which kinda implies she doesn't exactly know the Hades mythology or even seems to care if Hell seems more "spicy" and "sexy".

8. no more persephone x hades. if the antis hate us making OCs so much, someone should design cyane! you know. the nymph who literally died trying to protect her?

9. To that one anon - about Apollo needing to drive the sun chariot - Helios is still up there. He could perform the duty of leading the sun across the sky. 

10. oh lo apollo is pretty clearly based off someone rachel knew and was harmed by IRL, which like if that's so then go to therapy? get help? dont take out your issues on a real god from a real place and pretend you're the second coming for homer for the bastardization of a real country's mythology and culture.

11. So you guys know that famous statue "the rape of Persephone"? I think RS took it a little too literally. While the title states 'rape' its more of an allusion to kidnapping than anything else.

Or perhaps it's titled like that to draw a comparison between the violation of Persephone's personhood, her identity and her lack of agency in the situation.

I mean, when people hear the name Persephone they tend to think of Hades wife and the story of how she was kidnapped against her will.

I think perhaps RS saw the statue and confused rape with kidnapping - or decided to conflate the two. She wanted persephone to be kidnapped And raped (for plot reasons), and thus, further stripped away Persephone's agency regarding the situation (because in some versions of the myth after Persephone is kidnapped she finds she is actually ok with the underworld so long as Hades treats her with respect - which he does).

But because RS wants Hades to be the MVP she decided (for some reason) the villify Apollo (who yes, Demeter mythologically does have beef with, but Not for that reason). 

12. Alright hold on a moment - in some versions of the myth Persephone Did wander down to the underworld by herself (because, if I recall, she heard the sorrow filled voices of the dead and wanted to help them) - and in some versions of the myth Hades isnt even present - its just Persephone ruling the underworld by herself like the badass queen she is.

Also, yes - Demeter was a loving mother who grieved for her daughter and she had every right too - but I wouldn't say Persephones kidnapping was entirely Hades' fault (as the comic points out Zeus "gifted" Persephone to Hades *real Dad of the year there*).

Also also in some versions of the myth of the Kidnapping of Persephone - Hades is noted as a pretty mild mannered God - he is respectful of Persephone and seems to love her (and yes, depending on the myth Persephone either ate the pomegranate seeds on purpose or because Hades tricked her) - there are many different variations of the myth. There isnt really a "agreed upon narrative" by everyone - as far as I know.

I think most versions of the story state that neither Hades nor Demeter were pleased with Zeus decision to have Persephone stay 6 months with each of them, but because she ate the pomegranate seeds it was a kind of rule that she had to stay for each seed she ate, hence the 6 months.

If you guys want to get some more broad details of the myth I suggest OSP's "Hades and Persephone" video - which goes a bit more into the canon.

So overall I would say, yes Demeter was a loving mother who grieved her daughter (who was stolen - in most versions) AND Hades was comparatively a decent husband, despite his flaws. Both these statements can coexist - I promise. 

[whereisten]

Gentle Monsters

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 Intro | Part 6 (End)

Summary: After a night of running from a wild animal, you meet Johnny, the owner of the conservatory greenhouse you accidentally broke into. Johnny is kind and sweet—a little too sweet.

Pairing: Werewolf!Johnny X female reader

Warnings: horror, violence, blood and gore, mentions of scars and bruises, angst, supernatural powers, death, profanity, smut (fingering, penetration, breast fondling, dry humping), manipulation, obsession, possessiveness, yandere themes.

Word count: 12.1K

(A/n: wow wow wowwww this is it you guys! I hope you enjoy the last installment of this fic 🥺 it’s my personal favorite fic that I’ve written so I’m kinda sad to finish it, but thank you all for your continuous support that keeps me going, it’s almost been a year!! Wow! Pls read until the very enddd❤️)

—————

Yuta was ruthless. He never gave you time to breathe once he attacked you. He’d grab your wrist and kick your chest, sending you into the rough cement in his backyard.

“Do you like being best friends with the floor. Get up and fight. If you can’t take a hit from me, a human, how on Earth do you think you’ll survive a werewolf’s attack?” Yuta looked up at the bright sun while you panted on all fours.

“Human? I’m not so sure about that. I mean..you don’t have to go easy on me..but..fuck..please..can we go slower? This is just..a lot.” You pleaded, not realizing that Yuta was walking up to you quickly.

He kicked you in your rib, making you groan in pain and collapse over onto your back. You laid there and struggled to move as Yuta planted his right foot on your chest.

On top of never being the best at physical things, you were still healing from the effects of the killer pregnancy. Your body was fragile.

“Go easy? You’re pathetic, you don’t stand a chance.”

You hugged yourself as you tried to pull his heavy foot off of you. Tears started to run down the sides of your face while you cried and grew hot with anger. It was the second day of training and Yuta expected you fight like Bruce Lee.

“We haven’t even touched the katana’s yet..do you want to die, huh? Because if I don’t kill you by the end of this, I’m sure Johnny will.”

“Fuck you!” You screamed.

Yuta lifted his foot off of your chest and stepped back. “Get up, show me how angry you are.”

You picked yourself up and looked down at your bruised knuckles. Yuta made you spend hours boxing bags of sand until your hands bled, yet you couldn’t fight him, you could never land a punch.

“Johnny was right to choose you.. he knew you were weak, he knew you didn’t stand a chance against him..” Yuta was pushing your buttons now. Would you cry? Would you become furious? He didn’t know, but he hoped it would be the latter. He hoped that you would use that anger to fuel your attacks. The fact that Johnny had put you through so much shit was the the only thing that gave Yuta hope for you.

Yuta stepped closer to you.

“You didn’t put up a fight, you ignored all the signs, and then what? You ran away..oh, and let’s not forget.. you needed the help of another werewolf to get away from him. You couldn’t do it on your own.. and why’s that, y/n? Hm?”

Yuta tilted his head. He took your chin in his hand and watched as your eyes grew watery and your face lose color.

“Answer me, sweetheart.” His voice was sweet even when he was being condescending.

You shook your head, too caught up in his words to know how to respond. So many emotions ran through your mind. You were upset, sad, heartbroken, confused. Everything all at once.

“What’s wrong? Wolf got your tongue?” He chuckled.

And at that moment, you decided you couldn’t take it anymore. You quickly swat his hand away and lay a punch to his jaw. But he recovers fast and grabs your hair, pulling your head back while you cry out in pain.

But you don’t let this pain distract you, you kneel him in the rib and punch him again while he doubles over.

Yuta is caught off guard by your swift actions and doesn’t know how to respond. So you take this opportunity to swipe a leg through his, making him fall onto the ground hard as he loses balance.

He tried to get up but you swing your foot into his side just like he did to you a few minutes ago. You realize that your foot won’t apply as much pressure as his, so you decide to put your entire body weight on himself sit on his chest.

You’re about to lay another punch to his beautiful face, but he grabs your wrist and swings his body over yours so you are under him now.

You grunt and throw your fist with your free hand into the side that you had previously kicked. Yuta groans in pain once more, but his grip on your wrist doesn’t loosen.

Instead, he grabs both flailing wrists and holds them above your head. He’s tightening his fingers around them so tight, you can almost feel and hear your bones start to break. You scream.

“Yuta!”

“Tell me what you are! Tell me why Johnny did this to you!” Yuta growled as your cried out in indescribable pain. Your hits didn’t seem to phase or impress him.

“Fuck you, Yuta! Get off of me!”

Yuta only smirked. His dark eyes widening, he takes pleasure in seeing you suffer like this, especially after you dared to hit him.

He dug his thumb into your rib, the same place he had kicked earlier. Your scream grows louder.

“Weak! I’m weak!!” Tears escape as you struggle to ignore the pains in all parts of your body.

Yuta lets you go and lifts himself off of you.

He rolls his neck as he looks down at you condescendingly.

You roll over onto your side and hug yourself while you cry.

“You’re weak, you’re soft, but worst of all, you’re wasting my time.” He says lowly as he steps into his house and closes the sliding door, locking you out to make you sleep outside in the cold once again.

You looked up when you heard the clicking of the door. Was he opening it up for you? Would he finally let you sleep inside?

“Tako!” He clicked his tongue to get his cat’s attention. You didn’t even notice that Tako had been watching you cry quietly.

He quickly ran inside and you heard the door slide and lock again.

Yuta was half-hoping that this treatment would make you give up and leave. A part of him didn’t care about this drama you were in. But another part of him wanted you to grow stronger. He could see the hurt in your eyes and he doesn’t know why he’s decided to care. He hates that he feels sympathy for someone he just met. You needed to be tougher, but he wasn’t sure how much time you had before Johnny would find you and put you to the test. Yuta couldn’t help but be worried for you.

——————

[A Month Later]

Your training with Yuta got better steadily. You were slow at first, but with practice you started to trust yourself and your body more.

Yuta helped you develop your physical as well as mental well-being. You had grown to be more spiritual, seeing yourself as a being with infinite talents.

“You have to feel every movement in your heart first, then you have to visualize it. But you must do it quickly. Werewolves get off on fear, they smell it, they anticipate it. And if Johnny is as powerful as you say, he’ll smell your fear from a mile away. He’ll know what you plan to do before you do. So you have to be unpredictable.”

Yuta sat across from you with his arms over his crossed legs. His gaze was intense as he spoke. His black hair tied out of his face and his expression stern.

The two of you had gotten to know each other over the weeks, you weren’t best friends or anything, but you felt safe around him.

He still spoke harsh words to make you angry, but you had gotten used to his method of teaching and learned not to take it personally.

Apart from having to eat alone, sleep outside on cold gravel, and adorn bruises in new spots on the daily..living with Yuta wasn’t that bad.

“Johnny has super strength and speed, but he’s not like Jaehyun, he can’t read minds.” You said quietly.

“Doesn’t matter. He’ll still get to you before you even draw the string on your crossbow or pull out your katana.”

Yuta sighed and looked at the ground before continuing.

“We can only be thankful that we do know his one weakness.”

Your brows furrowed. “What’s that?”

He looked up at you and chuckled. “You. It’s you. If he’s this intent on finding you..you were more than just the carrier of his baby..you have a piece of his heart. He clearly can’t let you go.”

You shook your head. “I doubt it, he doesn’t care about me and even if he did, how does that give me the upper hand?”

“Y/n...you really are naive..” Yuta shook his head.

“Johnny has a lust for power..but he also has a lust for you.”

Yuta stands up and draws out his sword.

“Stand up.”

You stand up quickly and grab your katana. The two of you had done this before. You’d fight for what felt like hours with your katana, and you always ended up with cuts on your neck and arms.

But you thought about what Yuta said today. You really thought about your movement. You visualized your attack before actually making it.

You went back and forth, clinking the swords together, making sure to block each other’s attacks so you wouldn’t be sliced open like fresh pieces of meat. It was difficult and scary, you could die at any moment. But what did you have to lose?

Yuta was shocked by your determination. At the end of the day, you always ended up with multiple cuts along your perfect skin, yet you kept going.

He could see the passion in your eyes, you were growing and becoming a fighter, you were no longer filled with immense sadness. You were filled with a beautiful fire that he wanted to nurture and grow even more.

Your robe had come loose slightly as you spun around with the katana after blocking his attack. The move revealed the soft skin of your chest and cleavage, causing him to become distracted for a split second.

You were able to swipe the blade across his abdomen. He cried out and fell to the ground on his knees.

“Shit! Yuta!” You dropped your katana and kneeled down in front of him.

Yuta only chuckled. “It’s okay, that was good.”

“I’m so sorry!” You apologized and took his hand away from his center so you could see how bad the cut was.

“Don’t worry, it’s not that deep, but it sure as hell hurts.” Yuta looked up at you and adored your face. Your eyes wide with worry, your lips parted, your delicate face decorated by sweat and straggly hairs that escaped your ponytail.

Your eyes drifted upwards to his and you caught his stare. You didn’t notice that you had been holding his hand even as you examined the wound.

You also didn’t notice that your robe was lose until he glanced down.

“Oh.” You became frazzled and quickly tied your robe.

Yuta smirked at how nervous you got and stood up. “That’s it for today. We’ll start with the crossbow tomorrow.” He groaned and headed back inside his house.

“Yuta..” you looked to the ground as you called his name, still embarrassed by your exposed skin.

He turned and winced at the pain.

“Are you sure you’ll be okay?” You were still worried.

Yuta smiled for the first time, and it was amazing. It was like the sun had personally come down to greet you. It was beautiful and brought about a ridiculously handsome look to the already gorgeous man.

You wished he would smile more. Would it take him getting hurt more for you to see this daily?

“I’m fine, I’ve stitched myself up more times that I can remember.” He started to close the door, but stopped.

“Actually, you said you were a bartender, right?”

You ran into Yuta’s kitchen and gathered all the ingredients you needed.

Yuta was getting his first aid kit together while you whipped up a delicious alcoholic beverage.

“Make it strong, I don’t want to feel this shit.” He yelled out from the bathroom.

You smiled to yourself as you watched the vodka fill his glass and disperse the cocktail or lemon juice, sparkling water and berries you collected from his garden. It has been a while since you did what you do best, so you were happy to mix a drink for him.

Y/n..

A voice suddenly entered your ear. It was a soft whisper, but you swore the person was right behind you. You turned around quickly, but saw nothing.

Yuta was still in the bathroom, you could hear the water running.

Y/n...

The voice said again and your heart started to race when you recognized the voice.

“Johnny?” You called out, your grip around the glass grew weak, your eyes became watery, your breathing became shallow. A chill in the air made you shiver.

Time stood still for a moment and you didn’t know what to do. Johnny was nowhere to be found. Were you just imagining things?

“What’s wrong?” Yuta said once he walked into the kitchen and saw the look on your face.

You looked back at him and shook your head. “It’s nothing.. here.” You gave a small smile and handed him the glass from your trembling hands.

He took the glass but stepped close to you, locking you in between him and the counter.

“Don’t lie to me, what happened?” He knew something was wrong when you started crying suddenly.

You shivered. “I-I don’t know, Yuta..I thought I heard him..but I..”

Yuta’s eyes grew and he looked to the floor. “He’s trying to find you..”

“How does he still do this to me, Yuta? I feel like..I can’t breathe..my heart, it wants me to go to him.”

“Don’t...” Yuta turned away from you and headed to the dining room.

He groaned as he sat down slowly.

“You have to remember what he put you through, always remember your pain first and foremost. It’s difficult to remember the pain our loved ones brought us, but we have to in order to be stronger.” Yuta gulped the strong drink down.

You nodded and wiped your eyes. “How’s your wound?”

Yuta closed his eyes tightly as the bitter taste of the alcohol settled in.

He lifted up his shirt to show you a wound almost completely healed.

Your eyes grew. “W-Wait, how-“

“We have witches and herbs here too, you know.” He winked.

You nodded and turned to leave.

But before you did, you turned to him to ask one last question.

“What happened to you, Yuta? How did you become this..a hunter? And why did you stop?”

“What is this? Twenty questions?” Yuta rolled his eyes.

“The truth always comes out when you’re drunk.” You have him a playful wink and smile.

You just wanted a distraction, something to lighten the mood and make you forget about the monster that was so close to finding you. The monster that still made you tremble.

And Yuta knew this. He knew you were shaken up by it, so he caved. He had a painful past too, but he didn’t mind sharing it with you for some reason.

“I was in love once..I was happy..” Yuta looked on the centerpiece that sat on the dining table. It was a small sculpture of a beautiful ballerina.

You sat down across from him and waited for him to continue. He swallowed hard.

“But my younger brother..he grew jealous of me, he had a young love that passed away suddenly of an incurable illness. And when he passed, my brother grew heartless, he hated happiness. He hated anyone that lived happily, because he couldn’t. His lover never got the chance to be happy.. death had snatched him away, but why? Why couldn’t death take someone else? Why him?”

You felt sadness wash over you as you thought of the pain Yuta’s brother endured.

“A year passed and he barely spoke to me, he lived alone and stayed away from us, his family. But once I got married to Hina..my dear Hina..” Yuta’s frowned turned into a small smile as he started to think of the wonderful memories he shared with Hina.

He cleared his throat. “Once I got married..I started to see my brother more often..and I thought he was getting over his lover’s death, I thought he was moving on and finally deciding to spend more time with me...but I was wrong.” Yuta looked up at you and gritted his teeth.

“He betrayed me..he gained my trust, he gained Hina’s trust and one day, he said they were going to the market to pick up vegetables for the family dinner we had planned that evening. At the time, we lived in the city, so I had to clean up our apartment and get things ready while they headed out to the countryside.”

He looked down and blinked slowly. “My brother..took Hina to the werewolves...he was one himself, but at the time I had no idea they even existed. They turned her into one..they manipulated and tricked her so she turned on me. She was no longer my bright Hina that loved cherry pie and Pikachu. She became...a monster, something I couldn’t recognize.” 

“I tried to hold onto her when my brother brought her to me to boast about what he’d done. He laughed as I cried and felt pain, telling me that the alpha had rewarded him greatly for bringing a woman that he could turn and impregnate. The alpha was growing an army of werewolves in the woods and needed more women. I tried to make her stay, tried to tell her that I’d love her regardless of what she was..but..” Yuta choked up. He had never shown this much emotion to you before.

“You don’t have to continue, Yuta..I’m sorry.”

But he swallowed hard and continued, wiping away his tears and staring at the table. “She called me a fool and left me, she said she never loved me and that she belonged to her alpha. I didn’t fight hard enough.. I didn’t try. They would taunt me some nights. I would have dreams of being with her. Dreams of walking under cherry blossom trees, holding hands as we feed birds and swimming in crystal blues lakes. Sweet dreams that I wanted to live in forever, then they’d turn into nightmares. I’d wake up after feeling like I’ve been scratched or bitten.” 

“Then one day she appeared in my apartment with her alpha. She was happy and pregnant, her alpha was always holding her close, kissing her cheek in front of me. And I couldn’t do anything, I was powerless. My brother got what he wanted. He wanted someone else to feel the pain of losing someone they loved, someone they’d cross the Earth for.”

“I still loved her.. I only wanted the best for her..but they started to hunt and kill people in our town as their pack grew. I knew I had to stop them. I trained. I told myself I was doing it so I could stop them, but really..I thought becoming a hunter would give me the chance to get her back..”

Your eyes widened. You wondered what happened next.

“I..killed them..all of them..I saved her for last because she was merciless. She was incredibly strong, and fought me like she didn’t know who I was. At the last moment, she grabbed a child from a nearby village as I chased her through the woods. She was going to eat her so I had to shoot an arrow into her chest.. I tried to save her..but I couldn’t. Ever since then, I’ve tried to save innocent people from those terrible beasts. I’ve made a name for myself as a werewolf hunter and fought the worst of the worst. Jaehyun hates me so much, he got me put on the no-fly list so I can’t leave this place. But I don’t care...I don’t regret anything. The only thing I regret is ever having the nerve to trust someone.”

He paused.

His eyes started to tear up again as he looked on the smiling ballerina.

“She was a dancer..the best..”

“Yuta..” you reached out to hold his hand but he pulled away and stood up.

“Now you know why I’m like this..it’s time for you to leave.”

Your mouth fell open, you didn’t know what to say, but Yuta didn’t want to hear it anyway.

He knew you pitied him, and a part of him was embarrassed to get this personal with someone that he had no future with.

You nodded and got up.

“I’m sorry.” You say and you’re about to open the sliding door but he stops you.

“Y/n..where are you going? It’s raining.” Yuta runs a hand through his hair once he realizes that his tone was unnecessarily harsh towards you.

You shrugged your shoulders. “It wouldn’t be the first time that I’ve slept in the rain, Yuta.”

Yuta walks up to you and places a hand on the door to keep you from opening it.

You look up into his eyes and furrow your brows.

He licks his lips and breathed heavily. “Sleep here..in my bed..”

Your eyes widen.

“I mean, not with me in it..” Yuta rolls his eyes. ��If you get sick, it’ll only slow down your training and I can’t have that, so sleep in here after you shower.”

Yuta walks away as your mouth falls open.

You never would’ve thought he’d let you sleep in the house let alone his bed.

Maybe he was a nice man.

“W-where will you sleep?” You ask.

“Lucky for you, I’ve got a sweet hammock with my name on it.”

Yuta plops down into the hammock in his living room. You never noticed it, but it did look comfortable.

“Pspspsps..” he calls over Tako who happily jumps into his lap as the hammock swings back and forth gently.

Tako curls into his lap while Yuta’s head falls back. He closes his eyes and rests his hands on the back of his head.

You laugh to yourself quietly and turn the lights off before heading to the bathroom.

—————

You wake upon a plush bed for the first time in months . It feels heavenly so as the daylight pours in through the blinds, you smile to yourself and hug the blanket over you.

But then, everything clicks, you jump up in the bed and realize that it’s not yours. You stand up and quickly fix the pillows and smooth the sheets.

You leave the room and walk around the house quietly, trying not to wake Yuta up.

Yuta, however, is nowhere to be found, you look over to the hammock and see that he’s not in it anymore, nor is he in the kitchen.

Tako is still eating his breakfast from his bowl in the kitchen.

“Your father just fed you, so where is he?”

You open the sliding door to the backyard and hear water splashing. When you walk around the bushes and go deeper into it, you see Yuta is taking a bath in a large stone that was placed in the ground and shaped like a tub. You always bathed in it, but never thought he used it since he always used the shower in his bathroom.

It was hidden in the center of shrubs and flowers, but you peeked through a small opening and looked on him.

This is wrong, isn’t it? Hmmm a peak won’t hurt.

You look onto Yuta radiant skin, created and graced by the gods themselves. His waist slender but his arms were quite brawny.

His skin was littered in scars. He had been through so much in his life as a hunter, and his scars showed that it wasn’t easy. It took a toll on him physically and mentally as well. You understood why he no longer hunted.

Yuta turns to rinse his chest and stomach now and you bite your lips at the site of the water running down him. His abs and pecs are strong and sculpted, his wet hair is slicked back, revealing his dark, long lashes and high cheekbones. He so perfect it almost seems like he’s moving in slow motion. It’s like he’s shooting a commercial for some expensive cologne.

Just when your mind starts to run wild with lustful thoughts, you feel a light scratch on your ankle.

You yelp and look down at the source.

It’s Tako, gazing up at you with those big green eyes. He’s clearly not amused by you watching his father bathe.

But your sound of shock gives your location away. You look back up at Yuta and see that he is still rinsing himself off. Maybe he didn’t hear you.

You hurriedly tip toe away and back into the house.

Yuta smirks to himself and thinks about how cute you are, peeping through bushes to watch him bathe.

———————

[A Week Later]

You continue to improve and become familiar with the crossbow. Yuta tells you all about it and how the arrows must be covered in silver to make any sort of impact.

Your aim becomes better, but you have to be faster.

“If a werewolf is coming at you full speed, you can’t hesitate.” Yuta looks into your eyes. He stands to your side and places his hand over yours on the arrow.

He has to step closer to you so that you can draw the arrow back together. You feel his hot breath on you, you smell his fresh scent and feel the warmth of his body on yours. His hands are rough, but he touches you ever so lightly.

Sweat formulates on your forehead as you breathe heavily.

“And just like that..” his voice comes out in a low whisper.

“Release.”

When you both let the arrow go, it shoots straight through the center of the  mannequin’s chest.

Yuta still stands close to you. You turn to look up at him as he stares into your eyes.

“What’s wrong?” You ask him.

“That was weak, what were you thinking about?” Yuta is intimidating. It’s like he always knows when you’re not focused.

“Nothing, Yuta. I just..” you stumbled over your words.

“Just what? Thinking about last week when you watched me bathe?”

You blink fast. “I..wasn’t watching you..what are you talking about?”

“I’m a werewolf hunter, you can’t hide from me, y/n.” Yuta smirked.

“I-I don’t know what you’re talking about.” You walk towards the mannequin to remove the arrow.

Yuta stepped back and chuckled. “Suuuure.”

You rolled your eyes, but silently curse yourself.

There’s a growing tension between you and Yuta and you can’t explain it, but the more familiar the two of you got with each other, the more you wanted from him. Yeah, maybe the two of you were emotionally unstable, but that didn’t stop you from wanting a physical connection with someone. Yuta would touch you more, he’d let you sleep in his bed while he slept on the hammock, and now, he started to cook for you.

He was doing the bare minimum, but it meant so much to you and you couldn’t help but look on him fondly.

Later that evening, you’re taking your usual evening bath. You lay back and enjoy the warm water that soothes your aching body, your arms laid out along the sides. The soft breeze and gentle, dimming sunset makes you feel euphoric. You close your eyes and try to clear your head, unaware of the peeping eyes that now watched you.

Yuta watched the way your head fell back and you neck elongated. Your hair shiny and long lashes darkened by the water.

You looked incredibly beautiful in the sunset, he had to watch you. He had been watching you since you washed your back and revealed the large scars on it. He wondered how you had gotten them since Johnny never seemed to have hurt you.

You hear the bushes shuffle a little bit as Yuta makes noise on purpose to scare you.

Your eyes flicker open and you look to the side that you heard the noise from.

“Hello?” You call out and sit up straight in the large tub.

Yuta steps out from the bushes, he looks into your eyes and doesn’t hide his stare even when you cover your chest with your arms. It looks like he’s just left the shower as he stands in front of you in only a silk robe and his long, wet hair.

“Yuta...” you call out his name in a sweet, but low tone. He steps closer and you relax, removing your arms from your chest and sinking back down.

“What happened to your back?” Yuta’s gaze is hungry and you want him to come closer.

“Tell me about your battle wounds..and I’ll tell you about mine..” you tilt your head to tell him to come inside the tub with you.

Yuta drapes his robe off and steps into the tub. He steps closer to you, your back hitting the edge as you can’t back away any more.

“It’s not so nice being watched, is it?” Yuta smirks.

“Well..I don’t mind it, as long as it’s you.” You whisper but you look at his lips as you speak, ready to feel them on yours.

Yuta leans forward and kisses you, his tongue instantly darting across the plump surface for entrance. You hold onto his back and press his  body closer to yours. You kissed with a sense of urgency, like you had both been longing for this moment for some time.

Your heart beat fast as he bit your bottom lip lightly then kisses your jawline. His steamy breath decorates it while his hand runs through your hair.

The warm water feels amazing on your two bodies joined together like intertwined fingers.

Yuta cups your breast, massaging the nipple in between his thumb and index finger while he watched your mouth fall open.

He kisses your mouth once again, kissing it sloppily and with haste as your whines push him along.

Yuta continues to mark the delicate skin of your neck while massaging your scalp.

You take his face into your hands and look into his eyes deeply. You bite your lips.

“Touch me.”

Yuta kisses you again, never letting go this time while you wrap your arms around his neck and let your body float upwards in the water.

Your legs wrap around his waist. You feel Yuta run his hands up and down your thighs before running his fingers along your slit.

You shiver at the light touch on your sensitive skin, but whimper quietly.

He pushes his fingers into you, letting go of your lips once more so he can watch you shudder at the feeling of his fingers inside you.

You reach down and stroke his member as he continued to push his long fingers into you, his thumb drawing circles on your bud while you cry out his name.

He groans as he feels your soft hand pumping him and rubbing along his tip.

He can’t seem to focus now as the feeling begins to take over, he stares at your naked body, your breasts rising up and down in the water as you ride his fingers, the way your mouth stays open as he stretches you out.

You let go of his member and place your legs down. You turn around and push your butt out as you hold onto the edge of the tub.

“Fuck me, Yuta.”

Yuta gently places your hair to the right side of your neck so he can see your beautiful face as he takes you from behind. He places small kisses on the exposed side before holding your waist and pulling you back towards him. Pushing into you slowly while you gasp.

He takes both wrists in his hand and places them above your head before pushing in and out of you, taking his time so he can feel your walls tighten around his veiny member.

His thrusts are slow but hard, hitting your sweet spot once he finally pushes in all the way.He groans when you clench around him, throwing his head back to keep his hair from falling in his face.

The water splashes onto the ground as he moves faster. Your whimpers grow louder and your satiny walls start to clench around him without control, driving him crazy. He kisses your lips while he makes sultry, hot love to you during the sunset. His chest covers your back and you feel safe. The love Yuta makes to you feels sincere, he kisses you like he can’t let go, like he needs your love to breathe.

And when he isn’t kissing you, his touch is gentle. He gazed at you like you’re a precious gift.

His hips snap into you and you cry out his name. He grunts and starts to rub your clit again with his other hand.

You can feel the bruise start to form on your neck as Yuta sucks on it harder.

Yuta kisses your lips then looks into your eyes as he rubs and pushes in faster. “Cum for me, baby.” he leans into your ear and whispers lowly.

You quiver around him as you climax, a loud moan leaving your mouth as you become dizzy and your eyes close tightly.

Yuta climaxes after, still kissing your lips as he comes. His movement slows and you both breathe heavily once your done kissing.

He pulls out and steps away to the opposite side of the tub while you turn around.

Yuta brushes his hair back with his fingers, his face looking stressed as he looks into the water.

“What’s wrong?” You ask him.

“Nothing.” Yuta says sternly, his tone and mood is the complete opposite of what it was just minutes ago.

Did he regret doing this? Was he thinking about Hina?

“Yuta-“ you start but he gets up and walks out of the tub. He swiftly throws his robe on and heads back to the house.

When you dry yourself and head in, you see that he’s already fallen asleep on his hammock.

—————

[Later That Night]

You’re sleeping when you hear an airy voice call your name. You shift on your side and ignore it, thinking it was something from your dream.

But then, you hear it calling you again. You open your eyes lazily and look around for Yuta.

You squint and see that no one is there in the darkness. So you lean over to the bedside lamp and turn it on.

When you look back at the end of the bed, you’re startled to see Jaehyun..

“Jaehyun?” You whisper his name then jump on the bed and crawl towards him.

“What happened?”

Your eyes widen when you see that Jaehyun’s chest has been ripped open. The bones of his ribcage stick out into the air. He is covered in blood and his face is covered in scars. His chest is hollow and when you look closer, you see that it’s empty, no heart rests in the cavity.

Your eyes start to tear up. “J-Jaehyun..”

Jaehyun looked away from your eyes. He exhales then sits on the foot of your bed. You rush to sit beside him and look at him questioningly.

“He won, y/n. I tried..but..I wasn’t strong enough.” His voice was somber, his eyes low as he stared at the floor. This was unlike him, he was quiet, sad, defeated.

You reach out to hold his hand, but your hand falls onto the bed and that’s when you realize what else is different with Jaehyun. He doesn’t have a glow about him because you’re dreaming, no, he glows because he’s a ghost.

Jaehyun looks at you while your mouth falls open.

“He..he did this to you?”

“Yes..and he’ll do the same to you. You have to stay away from him. When you ran away, father died shortly after. Johnny lost it. He started killing anyone that would challenge or disagree with him..”

Jaehyun looks to the floor again.

“I couldn’t stop him..I don’t think anyone can. Don’t go back, y/n, you can’t go back.”

You swallowed hard. “I have to stop him. I have to-“

“You don’t understand! He’s powerful, by killing me he’s attained my abilities. He’s still trying to harness them, but in no time he’ll be unstoppable once he controls them. He told me that he will find you and kill you since he can’t have you, y/n. He’s furious that you ran away.”

Jaehyun’s voice got louder. He furrowed his brows and looked at you with anger.

You drew in a sharp breath. “So it was him..”

You thought about the afternoon when you were in the kitchen and heard his voice. Johnny was using telepathy he attained from Jaehyun and was trying to find you.

“He spoke to me the other day, Jaehyun. What if he already knows where I am.”

“He is still in the learning phase. It takes much energy to find someone that is thousands of miles away. He won’t be able to find you for now, for sight and touch are the most difficult senses to develop when trying to contact people telepathically.” Jaehyun’s face relaxes.

“I’m going to kill him, Jaehyun..” tears run down your cheeks as you look at the final state of Jaehyun before his death. You could tell he put up a fight.

Jaehyun closes his eyes and sighs. “I had a feeling you’d say that...it seems I can’t stop you either.”

“I can’t run away forever, he’ll think I’m afraid and he doesn’t deserve that satisfaction.” You shake your head.

“If you do decide to fight him, you have to do it soon. He’ll kill more people to get stronger. He’ll destroy towns until he gets to you. He has broken the laws of nature because he knows no one can stop him. There is an imbalance that can only be corrected if he is stopped.”

Jaehyun looks around and down at his hands as he starts to fade.

Your eyes widen. “W-what’s happening? Don’t leave me, please.” You beg but Jaehyun only smiles.

“I don’t have much time, I transferred all of my funds to the credit card I gave you. I had a feeling that everything would go to shit fast, so I forged a marriage license between us. Everything from my life insurance policy will go to that card, because I listed you as the beneficiary. I told my some guys I know not to look for you, but to make sure everything runs smoothly in case I’m gone..”

“W-Wait, Wait..we’re married? How-“

Your brows furrow.

“I have connections, baby.” He gives a wink, but his tone turns more serious when he glances down to your lips.

“We could’ve been great, you and me...” Jaehyun says softly. “I’m sorry I was greedy, I’m sorry I couldn’t stop him in time. This is the least I can do to help you.”

“Jaehyun..” you tried to touch him again, but felt nothing but cool air at your finger tips.

“Live as I would live, y/n. Take care of yourself. I hope you can forgive me.” Jaehyun leans forward and kisses your forehead. You barely feel it as he starts to disappear completely.

You burst into tears. “No..no, don’t leave.”

But Jaehyun is no longer there. It’s just you now on the bed, you hold your face in your hands and sob quietly.

—————

[A Week Later]

Doyoung is gathering medicine from trees in the woods behind his house, he places them into his basket and heads back to his house.

Once he enters it, he notices that something isn’t right. The air is different, the smell is putrid. Something smells of death.

When he looks down, he sees that the trail of wolf’s bane he placed on the floor has been disturbed, it’s no longer straight and has been broken in the middle.

Doyoung’s eyes grow, he looks around and listens closely.

“You dare to enter the house of a witch without permission?”

Doyoung sees Johnny with his all-Seeing eye, he’s looking around his bedroom while Doyoung stands still at the doorway waiting for him to appear.

Johnny turns the corner and walks slowly towards Doyoung.

“It’s been a while since we’ve seen each other, Doyoung.” Johnny’s voice comes out gravelly.

Doyoung looks sternly at Johnny, he already knows why he is there. He knows that Johnny has gone on a killing spree since you ran away. He’s dangerous and from the look on his grim face, his red eyes and messy hair, he can tell that he hasn’t slept for days. Doyoung can also smell the blood on his hands, he can hear the screams of both innocent people and other werewolves, he can see the fear in their eyes as Johnny took their lives away.

It’s too much for Doyoung, it makes him sick. He knows Johnny has broken the laws of nature and deserves to die for it, but he didn’t want to challenge him alone. He would need multiple witches to take him down with him and they were nowhere to be found.

“You must leave.” Doyoung turns to his kitchen and starts to take his herbs from his basket.

Meanwhile, Johnny tried to read Doyoung’s mind, he tries to access his thoughts and previous conversations in an effort to find out where you are.

But Doyoung has protected his mind with a spell, no one can read it.

Johnny curses to himself and feels the fury in his chest start to build. The desire to kill grows strong. He’s so angry he can’t control it, every time he thinks he gets closer to finding you, he gets blocked and ends up with nothing. But not this time, he would see to it that he’d get information.

He looks around Doyoung’s place, sniffing so that he can pick up your scent. If you did get rid of his baby, Doyoung was the closest witch to town. Jaehyun would’ve surely taken you here.

“Where is she, Doyoung?” Johnny walks around calmly, and right then, he picks up a subtle scent of your hair from the corner of the center room.

He walks over to it. And closes his eyes, tapping into his telepathic ability to hear and see what exactly happened in that corner.

But he has no luck. He only smells you, so he knows for sure that you were there.

“I don’t know who ‘she’ is, I’ve been alone for quite some time now.” Doyoung responds, still tending to his herbs.

“You’re lying to me and I don’t like being lied to..” Johnny chuckles. “I can smell her.”

Doyoung sighs. “You’re a fool, even if I did know where she is, I have no obligation to answer to you. You’re pathetic and a coward, killing everyone to find her. She ran away from you for a reason, Johnny. Just let her go.”

Johnny’s expression grows serious. “Tell me where she is, and you won’t get hurt like the others.”

Doyoung scoffs and turns to him. He places his herbs down then walks over to Johnny.

He swings his hand and the front door to his house flies open.

“Are you threatening me? Do I need to remind you of what will happen if you kill a witch? There’s the door, get out.”

And Doyoung was right. Johnny was breaking many rules, but the one rule he couldn’t break was to kill a witch. Centuries ago, supernatural creatures made an agreement that they would all be bound to. And in that agreement, a law states that a werewolf’s supernatural abilities would only remain in tact if they agreed to never kill a witch. Furthermore, they would be instantly beheaded by the High Priestess, the oldest witch on Earth.

Johnny knew he couldn’t break this rule, but he also knew that he wanted to send a message to all supernatural creatures.

“Who said anything about killing you?” Johnny gives a devilish smile, his eyes grow into a stronger, deeper shade of red. Doyoung’s brows furrowed and he backs away.

Johnny uses his elongating claws and grabs Doyoung’s neck. He raises him until Doyoung’s feet dangle two feet above the floor.

Doyoung tightens his hand around Johnny’s wrist as he struggles to breathe.

With his other hand, Doyoung motions for a wooden chair to fly into Johnny’s back, but Johnny uses telekinesis to stop it from colliding into him, causing it to shatter into one hundred pieces.

His hand tightens around Doyoung’s throat as his face turns red.

The Johnny you knew wouldn’t have done this, but that Johnny was gone. He was now a tiny voice in the back of the head of a monster.

“Since you won’t tell me, I’ll make sure you never speak to anyone else again.” Johnny smirks, his eyes grow and he uses his other hand to force Doyoung’s mouth open.

Doyoung screams when Johnny pierces the center of his tongue with his big, sharp nail.

He then uses it as a hook and tugs it, ripping Doyoung’s tongue out of his wide open mouth.

Blood gushes out from Doyoung’s mouth, he starts to choke on it. He’s in so much pain, he doesn’t know what to do. If he should attack Johnny or think of a spell to reattach it.

His tongue flies onto the floor as Johnny drops his body. Doyoung cries, holding his bleeding mouth with one hand. He reaches out to his tongue with the other hand and attempts to pull it towards him, but Johnny picks it up and tosses it into his mouth, his fangs tearing through the tough and thick organ before swallowing it.

Johnny laughs loudly and licks his lips.

Doyoung tries to cry out “No,” but he can’t, he can no longer make any sound.

In a fit of rage, Doyoung motions to a glass of hogweed sitting on his counter.

He tries to throw it at Johnny, in an effort to blind him, but Johnny quickly reverses Doyoung’s telekinetic action, forcing it back to Doyoung. The glass shatters and the powdered hogweed enters Doyoung’s eyes.

Doyoung now rubs his eyes as the sharp, stabbing pain rubs throughout his entire body.

He flops on the floor, unable to think of what to do to ease the pain. Johnny looks down on him and tilts his head.

“You can’t see, cant talk..what good are you now as a witch?” Johnny chuckles and steps over him before heading out the door.

—————

[The Next Day]

Johnny uses his acquired senses from killing Jaehyun to reach out to you in your dreams.

He thinks that he is able to finally harness the ability. He wants to see your surroundings, but even more, he wants to see you, touch you, feel you again.

He sits up in the center or his dark room and crosses his legs. He is surrounded by the old silk robe you left, a hair tie you used to use, and your silver ring that he had to pick up with tongs. Having your things around him would allow him to bring about your image in his mind.

His eyes close, his eyes roll in the back of his head and he breathes slowly, he drifts into his dark mind, gradually forgetting about everything else and only focusing on his memory of you. 

After a few minutes, he finds you.

He sees that you’re sleeping in a bed, but he can’t figure out exactly where you are.

Your room is pretty plain, you cover yourself tightly with white sheets.

He looks down on you as you sleep quietly. He makes note that it’s nighttime where you are but daytime where he is, you’re no longer in the same country as him.

He looks out of the window in your room, and sees a few bushes but nothing that stands out.

So he turns back to you, adoring the way you’re curled up and you’re lips are pouted. He hasn’t seen you in so long, his human heart jumps in happiness for the first time in weeks.

He felt a tinge of hope when he had called out to you a few weeks ago and you said his name. He knew he was getting close. But now, he needed to know if he could finally touch you.

He gently rubs his finger across your face, his breath hitching in his throat and eyes widening when he feels the soft, cool skin of your cheek.

He starts to smile and sits down on the edge of the bed, waiting for you to wake up.

“Oh, my love, where are you?”

He says lowly.

Your eyes open slowly, you rub them with your small fists and squint.

“Hello? Who’s there?” You ask, but as your eyes focus, you see a pair of glowing red eyes and jump up in your bed.

You turn on the light and start to pant.

“J-Johnny? How did you-“

You’re shocked to see Johnny, he’s stronger and still handsome but his eyes are darker, they’re no longer doe eyes of kindness, they’re eyes of horror. He’s nothing like how he was when you were together.

He smiles as he looks at you and takes in your features.

You look around nervously when you realize that he might know where you are, but then you remember that he doesn’t know you’re with Yuta because Yuta sleeps on the hammock in the next room. If he’s contacting you telepathically, then he can only see your room.

You sit up straight and calm yourself.

“I know why you’re here, Johnny, I know your plan, I know that you lied to me!”

“I’m sorry..y/n..” he reaches out and places his large hand on yours.

“You were gonna kill me! You got me pregnant just so you could be the alpha! You told me..you loved me.” You couldn’t help but cry as you watched the monster in front of you, what did he do with man you once loved?

Johnny wipes away your tears, his face full of regret and sadness once he sees you cry.

His human side had taken over now, it always did when he thought about you, you made him weak, you calmed him down, made him remember he had a heart. It made him...human.

“Shhh don’t cry..I was going to save you, y/n.” The werewolf within him chuckles as he hears himself lie.

You know you couldn’t save her.

“Come back to me please..I miss you.” Johnny swallows hard and scoots closer to you.

You know that Johnny is trying to lure you in, but with each touch you remember all the moments you had together. The summer days you spent laughing and talking, the winter nights you spent cuddled up and watching horror movies. The days at the conservatory when you would walk around and listen to him talk about the beautiful shrubs and flowers in it. You would watch him speak with such passion because he clearly loved his job.

You remembered waking up to him cooking breakfast for you, the wonderful omelettes he made. You heard the sounds of the fair you guys went to and his glorious laugh, you saw his smile and felt his lips on yours, it all felt so real, like you were experiencing everything all over again. Johnny was manipulating your emotions, making you see these memories so it could break you.

And it seemed to work.

Johnny holds your face in his hand, he looks into your large eyes and leans down to kiss you. You kiss him back, closing your eyes and allowing yourself to fall weak into his arms like putty. It feels like the first time you kissed, slow and magical, his tongue playfully dancing with yours.

Everything feels so real, his soft lips on yours, his gentle touch.

He lays down beside you while your lips are still attached to his.

You caress his arms as he leans over you and fixes himself between your legs.

He draws the strap of your nightgown down and kisses along your collar bone.

You moan when you feel his broad chest on yours. His fingers prance along the skin of your inner thigh, moving dangerously close to the apex.

He lowers his lips to your chest, bringing the trim of the gown down to reveal your perky nipples. He licks around them while you whimper. You can feel your legs start to waver, you can feel his growing member push against the fabric of your panties.

You push your body upwards and grind against him to increase the friction. Your head falls back and Johnny moans as he continues to rub his covered member along your growing heat.

He sucks hard on your collar bone to decorate it with a bruise. His mind becomes giddy, he smells your beautiful womanhood, he can’t taste your sweet skin, your lovely mewls enter his ears and he silently goes crazy. He finally gets to feel you again. He finally has you under him and in his hands.

You lock eyes for a moment when he pulls away and looks down at you. You cherish his beautiful face, his hair wavy and dangling in front of his forehead. His eyes were softer now, you no longer saw red and he smelled like flowers, the ones he always brought home from his conservatory for you.

He licks his swollen lips then goes back to kissing you. Your kisses become hastier, he pushes into you harder, making sure to feel your covered slit.

“More..more please..” you’re tired of his teasing.

“I can give you more...just tell me where you are..and I’ll be right there..” Johnny sucks your nipple again and listens to you moan.

And you’re so needy and hot that you almost fall for it, you throw your head back once you feel his fingers push into your panties, and trace up and down your needy bud.

“I-“ you start but stop when you hear Jaehyun’s voice echo in the back of your mind.

Or was it more than that?

You quickly glance over to the side while Johnny still kisses your neck and see the ghost of Jaehyun actually in your room again.

You see his bloody chest and it all comes back to you.

“He’s lying. He wants to kill you, y/n. Don’t forget why you’re here.” Jaehyun looks on you sternly.

Your eyes become teary, but Johnny places his lips onto yours again. Your eyes flutter shut and when you open them once again, Jaehyun is gone.

You stop kissing Johnny and holds his face away from yours. He furrows his brows and looks at your lips while breathing heavily.

“I don’t..love you anymore, Johnny.”

Johnny blinks slowly and lifts himself off of you. His eyes become watery as your words echo in his head. He lost you.

You fix your gown and look up at him before swallowing hard.

“I’d like you to leave.”

Johnny’s eyes once filled with regret and yearning are now full of fire. They return to the glowing red color you had seen before.

“You can’t run away from me forever.” He says huskily and holds up his claw with scary, elongated nails. He’s about to gash into your chest, but you stop him.

“I know..I’ll be seeing you soon, Johnny.” You say before grabbing a small knife under your pillow and slicing Johnny’s throat, his apparition disappearing right before your eyes.

Johnny is abruptly transported back to his dull room, he holds his throat and takes in a sharp breath, shocked by how real the attack felt.

You lay back down in your bed and gaze at the ceiling. Johnny almost had you, he almost made you his again. You were weak and you shouldn’t have been.

You had to remember who he really was, what he had done to you.Your mind runs wild with thoughts, you know you can’t go back to sleep, so you decide to practice shooting with your crossbow until the sun rises and another day begins.

—————

[A Month Later]

“Do you think you’re ready?” Yuta asks while wrapping your arms with tape.

“Do you think I am?” You wait for him to look up at you. Ever since you made love, Yuta was hesitant to look into your eyes. He felt something he couldn’t explain.

He does look up at you as he tightens the tape. “I’m worried for you.”

He finally lets out and it’s true, he doesn’t want to get closer to you because he’s not sure if you’ll make it out alive. And he can’t help you because he is forbidden from being involved in supernatural affairs. Not to mention the fact that he’s also on the no-fly list.

He can’t lose another person he cares for.

You purse your lips and look away. “Don’t be. I’m ready.”

You want to get it over with so you can finally be free of Johnny. You want to live your life. What he did to you was unforgivable and he had to pay for it.

You’ve been training for a while and can finally keep up with Yuta’s attacks.

Yuta walks away from you and holds his head low.

“Yuta..will you come with me? We can find someone that can make you a passport, change your identity..”

Yuta shakes his head. “No, I haven’t been involved in werewolf issues for some time, I don’t plan on getting involved now..not even for you.” His tone was cold.

You huff and walk towards the sack of sand you used to practice kick boxing with.

“This so your battle. I will only complicate things” Yuta continues but you stop him.

“That’s not true, Yuta. You’re just scared to lose me. You’re scared that you’ll be the one to blame if I don’t survive.”

Yuta turns to you, his mouth falling open but no words come out, he doesn’t respond.

“I’m not Hina and I’m not your brother, I’ll kill this bastard with or without you.” You can feel the anger in your tone.

“Y/n..I’m sorry.” Yuta says quietly but you’ve already left to gather your things.

Yuta is unsure of how he feels about you, you have a place in his heart and as you spent more time together, that’s peace grew bigger. He’d watch you and fall in love with everything you did, from the way you played with Tako to the way you mixed drinks, the way you washed your hair to your determination. For the first time in a long time, he didn’t think of Hina. 

He only thought of you. And the truth was that that one evening he spent making love to you stayed in his mind. He couldn’t stop thinking about you. So he decided to distance himself, in fear of the inevitable pain he would experience when you were gone like everyone else.

He knew he was a coward for not saying goodbye to you.

————

[The Next Day]

You’ve arrived back in your hometown alone. You’re nervous and scared, but you know that you must face Johnny, even if you’re on your own.

The town is dark and sad, the streets are empty, the bar you once worked at was permanently closed. Your old apartment was abandoned.

The city had been turned upside down since you left and it was all because of him.

He had killed so many people that residents got scared and fled. The police couldn’t explain or help, and officials in higher levels refused to get involved because even though they knew the source of the madness, they knew better than to challenge it. So instead, they let a small town suffer and ignored the issue.

It’s a cold night, the moon shines brightly above you. At first, you thought it was naive to challenge a werewolf at the time when he’d be strongest, but Yuta taught you that this would be the best time, for his werewolf heart would be more exposed, switching places with his human heart, and thus, making the werewolf side more vulnerable.

Johnny knows you’re in town, he can feel a shift in the air. He knows you’ve come to fight him. All this time he was trying to find you, only to realize that you would come to him and fall right in his trap.

You push the doors to the conservatory open and walk inside it. You can see that the flowers and shrubs have wilted. It’s not like it was before, it was dark and sad, the waterfall in the center no longer poured out crystal water. Everything seemed to be dead or in the process of dying. Everything except the brilliantly green water lilies that looked magical as they floated on the surface of the pond.

The vines drooped down from the glass ceiling and fell into your face as you walked through it.

The once colorful and happy flowers hung low as if to represent the own feeling of defeat and grimness in your heart.

You hold your crossbow by your side, ready to use it at the slightest sound.

“Welcome home, my sweet strawberry shortcake.” Johnny’s voice echoed out, bouncing off of the high ceilings.

You looked around, but couldn’t find him.

“Enough with the games, Johnny.”

You looked to the side carefully, he sounded close but you couldn’t tell which direction he was coming from.

“But I like playing with you..” Johnny says lowly, you can almost hear his pout, but his voice tells you that he’s getting closer.

You listen closely and hear movement above you. You quickly aim your crossbow above you and shoot an arrow towards him. He hangs from the ceiling upside down and lets out a loud road as he dodges the arrow.

He’s fast and disappears from your sight when he drops down to the ground behind a group of ferns.

You quickly reload and hold your crossbow up again. Turning slowly until you get a glimpse of him.

Johnny is caught off guard by your swiftness. The human in him calls out to the werewolf in an attempt to stop himself. He just wants to hold you and love you again. He doesn’t want to fight, but the other part knows that he has to. He knows that there is no hope for the two of you. But you’re making him weak nonetheless. Unlike his other opponents, he still has feelings for you. A part of him doesn’t want to kill you.

While Johnny is in his thoughts, he doesn’t realize that you’ve spotted him.

You quickly pull back the arrow and release it, this time, landing a successful shot into his abdomen.

His wolf form is huge and unlike anything you’ve ever seen before, but you try not to be frightened by it. You thought of the very first night you dealt with one of these creatures and reminded yourself that you’re not that scared girl anymore.

You loaded another arrow while Johnny lets out another howl.

Johnny runs around the ferns with his super speed, knocking the crossbow from your hands. But before he does, you’re able to pull back and release another arrow into his shoulder. The contact of the silver and his skin causes a sizzling sound to emit.

Johnny towers over you and swings his claw into your side, scratching you so hard, you’re thrown to the floor twenty feet away.

You’re hoping the two shots make him weaker so you can attack his heart and finish him.

You wince in pain and hold your side as blood gushes out of it.

You start to stand up slowly, but Johnny grabs you by the throat and holds you up high.

“Let’s not fight. Make this easy for me, baby.” he growls.

You grunt and grab your katana that’s attached to your back, swiping it through his chest. Your sword cut deep, causing him to curse and toss you to the side as he bent over. Your sword was also coated in a special silver so the cut was unlike anything else. It burnt through the hairy flesh all the way to his lungs and other organs.

He coughed up blood and held himself up off the ground with one claw.

You yell and run towards him while he’s down and swing your sword again, but miss. He disappeared before your eyes and ends up behind you. He claws at your back over and over with ridiculous speed while you cry out in pain.

You fall onto your back and cry out in pain. He moves to kneel over you, but your cries distract him for a second. His facial expression changes to worry when his human side sees that you are hurt badly.

You look into his eyes and plead. “Please Johnny, don’t do this. I love you.”

You’re not lying when you say this, a part of you still does love him, but you only say it out loud to make him weaker.

He leans forward and his red eyes dissipate for a moment. Right then, you grab your katana and aim it at his chest. You put pressure on it so that it starts to pierce his skin but he quickly shifts back into full werewolf mode and grabs it with both hands.

You fight hard against his grip and push it in further while he starts to cough up more blood.

Before it can go in all the way, he grips the sword tightly, ignoring the sounds of his burning flesh on the blade and forces it out of your hands before tossing it to the side.

He picks you up angrily and bites into your shoulder. You cry out a blood-hurdling scream as the feeling of his sharp teeth breaks your skin, tears through muscles and shatters your bones. You can hear the cracking and feel your nervous system become overwhelmed with antagonizing pain. He tosses you to the center of the conservatory, then walks over to you while shifting back into human form.

“I didn’t want this..I didn’t want to turn you..”

He says softly.

“But you left me no choice...”

Your back rests against the same bench that you slept on the first night you entered this place. You breathe heavily and wince in pain, grasping onto as a much air as possible as you feel yourself start to fade.

You shakily take your gun out of your harness and hold it behind you while Johnny is distracted.

He’s too caught up in his own emotions and thinking he’s finally become victorious to read your mind and realize that you have yet another weapon that you plan to wield against him.

He kneels down to you and wipes your tears from your cheeks with his thumb. You’ve got him right where you want him.

“I can’t live without you..” he looks into your eyes, his own brimming with water.

You chuckle and he watches as blood stains your beautiful lips.

“Then die.” you let out.

Johnny’s brows furrowed and looks at you in confusion. He reads your mind a moment too late. You’ve already drawn out your gun and shot two silver bullets into his heart.

Johnny falls to the floor on his knees and winces in pain. He’s still confused as he looks back up at you. His mouth opens once he stands up and backs away from you. He feels his body start to shut down. On impulse, he tries to heal himself, but it seems as though the bullets have pierced through both hearts.

He can’t seem to heal fast enough, his vision becoming blurry. He coughs up blood and can’t back away anymore, his ankles being met with with short wall of the waterfall in the center of his beloved conservatory.

He trips and falls into the pond filled with water lilies. His body becoming limp as he can no longer feel or control his arms or legs.

You struggle to stand up on your feet, but eventually, you slowly stumble over to the pond and see his eyes are closed and his chest is no longer moving.

It’s over, it’s really over. You start to cry when you realize that he’s gone, feeling a mixture of both relief, pain and sadness wash over you.

You sit on the edge of the pond beside his body and look up at the sky. You cry out loud and uncontrollably, you can feel your body start to change, a vibrating sensation runs through it at the sight of the bright moon. But you’ve lost so much blood, your vision becomes blurry and you pass out.

You don’t feel the gentle fingers that cover your own as your body slouches over. Johnny uses the last of his energy to heal you just enough so you survive. He holds your hand tightly, giving you all that he has left as he cries quietly, waiting for death to finally consume him.

—————

[6 Hours Later]

Someone picks you up and takes you out of the conservatory. You can hear the person’s heartbeat and breathing, it’s strange. Your senses are heightened and you can feel the presence of another person beside the one carrying you.

The person places you onto a soft bed.

Your heavy eyes struggle to open, but when they do, you’re shocked to see that it was Yuta carrying you.

“Y-Yuta?” You ask quietly. As the sensation of sleeping dissipates from your body, you start to feel all the pain and memories of what happened flood your mind.

Yuta looks at you and sighs. “I’m sorry.”

He gets up and leaves the room before you can ask why he’s apologizing.

Doyoung then enters and you’re frightened.

Doyoung has a scarf around his eyes, but walks straight towards you with a bowl of liquid.

“Doyoung..what..what happened?” You start to sit up straight and wince at the radiating pain in your shoulder.

“He can’t talk..” Yuta comes back in.

You look up at him then back to Doyoung.

“Johnny ripped out his tongue when he wouldn’t tell him where you are.”

Yuta sits beside you on the bed and take a cloth out of the bowl of liquid.

Johnny.

You hiss in pain as he tends to your wounds.

“He’s dead right? Please tell me he’s dead.”

Yuta nodded. “Yes, it seems as though you did what you set out to do, you got a clean shot. Or perhaps you just got lucky.” He gives you a small smile and a wink.

You swallow hard and look to the ceiling.

“Why did you come?”

“I felt bad. I figured you’d need my help..and..” Yuta stumbles over his words.

“I was a dick to you back there..”

You smiled, but it quickly faded as you remembered your reality. You knew that you were a werewolf now. Even if Yuta did like you, there was no way you could be together.

You held his hand and stopped his movement.

“You have to kill me, Yuta. I can’t live like this..I can’t become him or..” you stopped before you said her name, but he finished it.

“Hina...” Yuta looks into your eyes somberly.

You nod as you cry.

“I know, but you won’t..not with me around..I’ll take care of you.” Yuta continues to cleanse your wounds.

“Why? I’m not your responsibility, you’ve helped me get this far, you don’t have to-“ you plead. You’re worried that you will bring him pain like the others did, you can’t bare to see his heart break when you become the monster he hates.

“I know..” he says strongly and puts the cloth back in the bowl. “I know..y/n..” he brushes your hair back with your hand.

“But we’re in this together, you’ve made my life exciting and worth living again. I won’t run away like a coward this time, I’ll fight for you.”

Your heart is warm, you start to smile and finally feel at peace. You were scared to see what would become of you now that you were a werewolf, but you were glad to see that you didn’t have to endure the pain alone.

——————

[The Next Day]

Johnny’s omega, Donghyuk goes to the Johnny’s house to look for Johnny. He discovers that the place has been destroyed. Broken glass is everywhere.

When he calls on police to tell them that someone has broken into Johnny’s house and that he can’t make contact with him, so they arrive and check out the house.

They see that all of Johnny’s belongings are still in the house so it couldn’t have been a robbery. So they head over to the conservatory to see if there are any clues there.

When they enter it, they see that the pond in the center is full of blood. And upon closer examination, they see that despite it being filled with crimson liquid, there is no body.

Johnny is nowhere to be found.

--------

A/N: YOU GUYSSS THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING!!! i hope you liked the ending...mayhaps there will be a book 2??????

[missdawnandherdusk]

I Will Rise

Hufflepuff!Reader X Draco

You can take everything I have

You can break everything I am

Like I'm made of glass

Like I'm made of paper

Go on and try to tear me down

I will be rising from the ground

Chapter 1     Chapter 2    

Chapter 3    Chapter 4

Chapter 5     Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Summary: With the next winter holiday things get to their lowest point. But rock bottom is always the place to start building up. 

A/N: So this was supposed to be super angsty with no end in sight but ya know, I changed my mind. This is angsty don’t get me wrong, but this is also where choices are made and people are changed for the better or worse. Sidenote: I just ended a four year relationship yesterday and ya know. I’m great. Anyway. Love yall!! Let me know that you think as always!!

Draco and I stood at the Manor gates. Dark clouds rolled in, suffocating us. They threatened with snow, ice, and fury.

“It’s the Dark Magic,” Draco noted, his voice seemingly indifferent, taking my hand.

I nodded, sighing. Something was to be said about missing sunny days and warmth. Even in the dead of winter, this chill sat differently on our shoulders. Winter promised spring... this artic promised nothing but death.

Inside and unpacked, Draco and I shared a bit of tea in front of a warm fire. He was reading The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe aloud, and despite my adoration of the book, I couldn’t seem to lose myself in the words as I once had. Even with the silkiness of Draco’s voice. I now had a deeper understanding for Narnians before the events of the book. An endless winter with only a small gossamer of hope to cling too.

“Wrong will be right, when Aslan comes in sight,

At the sound of his roar, sorrows will be no more,

When he bares his teeth, winter meets its death,

And when he shakes his mane, we shall have spring again.”

The words mocked me. Draco seemed to pick up on my disinterest.

“Don’t tell me you don’t prefer the book any longer?” There was a soft teasing smile on his lips as he closed the book, setting it on his lap. It was the one I had given him almost a year ago.

“No, I do,” It was a sad sigh. “I just... do you think someone is out there for us? An Aslan to come and save us?” I hugged my knees.

“Well, you know as well as I do,” He took the same book and flipped further back before settling on a page that seemed to satisfy him.

"Dearest," said Aslan very gently, "you and your brother will never come back to Narnia."

"Oh, Aslan!!" said Edmund and Lucy both together in despairing voices.

"You are too old, children," said Aslan, "and you must begin to come close to your own world now."

"It isn't Narnia, you know," sobbed Lucy. "It's you. We shan't meet you there. And how can we live, never meeting you?"

"But you shall meet me, dear one," said Aslan. "Are — are you there too, Sir?" said Edmund.

"I am," said Aslan. "But there I have another name. You must learn to know me by that name. This was the very reason why you were brought to Narnia, that by knowing me here for a little, you may know me better there."

A smile brushed my lips as he closed the book again.

“But do you think that was meant for us?” I laid my head on his shoulder.

“I think that it was meant to give hope,” Draco decided after a quiet moment, “Aslan, by any other name, would still be something to believe in,”

“Unless that name happens to be Harry Potter,” I chuckled, drawing a laugh from Draco. “And have you been reading my Shakespeare?”

“Maybe a bit,” A smile toyed at his lips.

“Romeo and Juliet though?” I rolled my eyes. “I told you, it wasn’t a good story to read presently,”

“I think you also told me that it was worth keeping the books that didn’t have a happy ending,” Draco set the book on the coffee table and pulled me into his hold.

“Do you think we’ll have one?” I asked softly. “A happy ending?” His face was hard to read as his eyes fixed on the burning fire.

“How can we with what we’re going to do?” The words echoed in my thoughts as we both sobered.

The plea for him to not do what he was asked of came rushing to my lips, but I held them there. I wouldn’t tell him. I had decided on that long ago. This was the one choice that he needed to figure out how to make on his own. I was torn myself. I wanted to tell him to stop, to help him make this choice, but I couldn’t. I didn’t know how to. But I could stay beside him... I prayed that it would be enough for him.

Even with the holiday upon us, the air was void of excitement and magic. The Manor was decorated immaculately even still. Tears stung my eyes, when thinking that this was the first Christmas I ever had without my mother, without baking or cooking or the music or movies. There was nothing to do in the kitchen with the house elves working and practically shoving me out of the room. There was nothing to clean. Nothing to tidy or move... It felt unnatural. Draco pulled me into his arms, giving me the comfort that I craved so desperately.

“Your mother is arriving soon,” He murmured softly. “Are you going to be alright?”

“I think so... we’ve been civil through writing. How bad could this possibly be?” My words were cynical but hopeful still. “Besides... at least it won’t be just the four of us. By comparison my mother will be a delight,”

“Bellatrix has agreed to be civil, and Snape always comes for Christmas. Or has before the last couple years at least. He’s my godfather, you know. He and my father were close when they were young,” Draco’s voice was strained. “But I suppose they will all be needles in a haystack,”

“It was right to invite the rest of...” I trailed off. “They’re alone too,” 

“Always the Hufflepuff, are we?” He mused softly.

I hummed in acknowledgement. I was still wary about Bellatrix attending supper. Too many things had the chance of going poorly.

“You know we have to do this,” He read my thoughts.

“The perfect children. The perfect couple. The perfect soldiers.” I sighed. “What I wouldn’t give to go back to that night at the Ball. Or the month after...”

“It’s ironic,” Draco chuckled darkly. “That we now know ignorance is bliss,” I nodded at the doorbell chimed throughout the house.

“Ready?”

“As I’ll ever be,”

It was something quite different dining with just the Slytherins and dining with their parents as well. It wasn’t just I and Draco who were playing perfect children, but all of my friends, everyone I knew. All sapped of joy, of smiles, expression... under the scrutiny of their parents. Blaise, Vincent, Greg, Theo, and Pansy.

“How has schooling been?” My mother tried asking as the first course was served. 

“Well—”

“Ugh,” Bellatrix scoffed. “Who can learn anything with that daft old fool as headmaster?” 

“Bellatrix,” Narcissa warned gently.

“Yes, yes. Civil. As you wish,” She rolled her eyes and slouched, digging into what I assumed was quail.

Draco and I shared a look. Attempts for conversations halted after that.

Dinner passed and I barely tasted any of the surely rich foods that were placed before me. After the awkward affair, my mother asked to speak with me in private. Draco, Narcissa, and oddly enough, Snape eyed me warily.

“Of course,” I gave Draco one last look. He looked as if he were ready to pick me up and make a run for it, but he refrained.

I led her to the small rose garden that Draco had once led me to. It seemed sacrilegious to tread upon this secret haven, but it was a place that gave me comfort. Though it was covered in snow and the trees and bushes were bare, I still remembered the summer warmth the garden offered.

“You have surrounded yourself with quite a group people my dear,” Her voice strained out the words. “And that dress is lovely,”

“A gift from Narcissa,” A tight smile touched my lips. 

“So, you’ve replaced me then?”

I turned, frowning at my mother.

“You really think that?” I was baffled.

“Well look at you! New dress, new shoes, new friends! You’re living and dining with a bunch of Death Eaters for Merlin’s sake!”

“Yes, because I had so much of a choice to abandon the people I love and come home and live with my mother who lied to me for fifteen years and manipulated me!” I watched as my sharp words silenced her.

“You could have come home any time,” It was a quiet notion.

“No, I couldn’t have,” I wrapped my arms around myself and took a deep breath. “I’m going inside,”

“Please, dear. It is Christmas,”

“Yes,” I turned to face her. “And I’d rather be inside with Draco, if you can understand that.” 

“Draco,” It was nearly a sneer. “I have heard... rumors about him.”

“I really don’t think you have any right to say a word,” I said, my tone as ice.

“You’re blind. Your own love blinds you to who he really is. You’re going to get hurt,” There was an air of concern in her voice.

“No! I’ve spent years of my life terrified of letting people in because you’ve got it so deeply ingrained in me that I might get hurt! Well you were wrong about the world! And you were wrong about me!” I stalked up to her. “I have done things that you will never know! That you will never understand! I’m living through a war for god’s sake mom! And you’re here yelling at me about who I’m dating!?” I took a small step back, shaking my head. “This was a mistake...”

“Y/n, wait, please, you have to understand—”

“No mom! You... you don’t get to just waltz in here and ask me to understand! I don’t have to understand, and you really don’t get to give a damn after all you put me through! Don’t you think I want to have my mother here for me!? That it doesn’t kill me inside because I’ve never felt so alone in my life!? That everything I’ve known has been pulled from under me and while I’m trying to set myself somewhere new you just criticize me!? No! You just...”

“And what would your father say?”

I gaped at her, enraged.

“How dare you!?” I annunciated each word. “Dad would be damn proud of me! And he never would have let you do what you did to me! I am supposed to be your daughter! But I’m done.”

Without another word I stalked up to the house and inside, fuming. Draco caught me at the door, but I shrugged him off.

“Love,”

“No,” I snapped. “I need to cool down, just...” Wordlessly I headed upstairs before collapsing behind a random locked door, sobbing.

After a while, when my tears had subsided and my frame only shook minimally, I pulled myself up off the ground and stumbled over to a vanity. It must have been a guest room that I found myself in.

The girl looking back was a mess. Tear tracks stained with mascara ran down her cheeks and red lipstick was smudged out of place. Her hair was hanging haphazardly and out of order. Her eyes were red and puffy, and her lips etched into a permanent grimace.

There was a knock at the door. 

“Go away, Draco,” I sniveled.

“Do I look like that blond-haired prat to you?” The door clicked closed softly as I saw Pansy’s reflection in the mirror.

“Pansy, please... I—”

“You don’t have to tell me anything. I’m not here to console you, not particularly,” She came up beside me and leaned against the vanity. “Everything’s really fucked up, huh?” Her voice was depressed as she looked down.

“That doesn’t even begin to describe it,” I muttered.

“You know, I can’t tell my parents about Abby at all,” Her confession was small and weak. “She’s not a pureblood, and well, they’re not as accepting as her parents are about our relationship...”

I looked up at her, my eyebrows furrowed, trying to figure out why she was telling me this now.

“We haven’t spoken all holiday,” This wasn’t the strong confident Pansy I was used to seeing, but rather a broken scared teenager. “She’s mad at me because I won’t tell my parents about her, and I... I can’t do it. I’m a coward,”

I let out a hopeless laugh and smiled at her.

“I just told my mother off and now I really think I’ve been disowned,” A dry humor coated my voice. “And I’m in love with the son of the man who killed my father,”

“Well shit girl,” Pansy laughed. “You make my problems seem so trivial,”

“Not my intention,” A smile met my lips. “And I’m really sorry about you and Abby... not saying that it’s anywhere near the same... but I’m aware of what it’s like to be scrutinized for my choice in partner.”

Pansy nodded and a silence fell between us.

“You’re going to run yourself thin, Y/n. Trying to be everything for everyone.” Her voice returned to its somber mood.

“I think I’ve past that point,” I muttered darkly.

“Then tell me, little Hufflepuff, who are you going to be?” There was a slight challenge in her eyes. “You don’t have parents watching over your every move, you don’t have the constant expectations.”

“I can’t just—”

“And why not?” She shot back.

“Because I have to protect Draco,” I breathed out. “Play the part and get through this,” 

She eyed me; eyebrow raised but said nothing. “If that’s what you think,” She mused. 

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” I shot back.

“Well, the girl I met a couple years ago would stop at nothing to be herself even if it meant being teased and bullied by a couple Slytherins. The same girl who cut off all her hair and started to fight back. I just wondered what changed.”

I opened my mouth to refute her point but refrained. A lot had changed. Draco was a Death Eater now. We had a trial to get through alive or we would both die. I had to somehow manage not to get killed by his aunt preferably. I still had to pass my bloody N.E.W.T.s as if the rest wasn’t enough.

“Tell me, or don’t. But I care about Abby and Draco a lot. And now I’ve got this kid sister under my wing and I don’t want to see her drive herself into the ground like I have. This war is shit, but you... Y/n, you’re someone to believe in.”

I tutted out a laugh. “I’m a mess. Please don’t believe in me,”

“But that’s what makes you so valuable to all of us. Blaise, Theo, Vin, and Greg too. You gave us all a second chance. It doesn’t take much to lay down your life for a good man, but to forgive a bunch of villains?”

“You’re not villains,” I refuted.

“See, that there. That’s why we believe in you.” Pansy smiled. “Even through it all, you still are kind and believe in us,” She tucked my hair behind my ear. “Now let’s get you cleaned up, because I’m sure Draco is on the verge of breaking in here himself,”

I laughed and pulled her into a hug.

“Thanks Pans,”

 _____________________________________

Draco paced outside the door as he heard your ragged sobs coming from within wishing nothing more than to go in there and hold you. But you had asked for space, so he tried to honor that. Draco jumped when he felt a hand on his shoulder.

“Pansy?” he asked, relaxing a bit. “What—”

“I’ve got this lover boy,” She smiled and patted his shoulder.

“She doesn’t want to be bothered,” Draco defended, glowering.

“Maybe not by you, but I think she needs a sister about now, what do you think?” Pansy raised an eyebrow at him, and it reminded him of all the times that Pansy had been there to be a sister to him and he nodded, knowing that it might help you more that he could.

Draco leaned against the wall, next to the bedroom door, his eyes closed.

“Draco?”

He peaked an eye open to find his mother on the landing with him.

“Is she alright?” Soft concern colored his mother’s voice.

“I have no idea,” It was a ragged whisper. “I knew we shouldn’t’ have invited her mother. I knew it was a bad idea,”

Narcissa laid a hand on his shoulder and tilted his chin up so that his eyes reached hers.

“It was going to happen eventually, but maybe now she can get some closure from it,” His mother sighed. “I remember the night that Andy walked out... it was weeks before that last fight and I could see how much it drained her. And you know it’s been hurting her too,”

“Andy?”

“Your aunt, Andromeda.” Narcissa smiled sadly. “Married a muggle and was disowned... she was barely older than you,”

“Talking about our dear sister again?” Another voice snarked from behind them.

They both turned to see Bellatrix leaning against the stair banister.

“She was a traitor, Cissy,” The witch sneered. “Walked away from this family. Married a muggle,”

“I know,” Narcissa’s voice was strained. “But I thought perhaps it would give some insight to what Y/n is going through,”

“Are you sympathizing with our dear sister then? Are you a traitor sister mine?” Bellatrix raised an eyebrow.

“Of course not,” His mother snapped. “If anything, Y/n has just affirmed her loyalty by turning her back on her muggle loving family,”

Draco knew the words were said to appease Bellatrix, but still he flinched at the reality of them and what it looked like on the outside. He knew that was far from the truth. He knew that you had walked out on your mother because she had a problem with you being with him. It had nothing to do with blood status. But perhaps the wicked narrative would keep you safe.

Three pairs of eyes snapped up as the door opened. Pansy emerged first, a smile on her face and you followed behind. You were smiling and held your head high. You were also barefoot, your stilettos in hand. Draco smiled at the sight.

His aunt on the other hand.

“Improper if you ask me,” She muttered.

“I don’t think anyone did,” The smile on your face was tight and he had to refrain from laughing at the look of shock on Bellatrix’s face. “My apologies Narcissa, I do believe that I may have ruined your dinner party,”

“Think nothing of it my dear,” His mother smiled. “I’m just glad to see that you’re alright.”

Tucked by his side, Draco tried to read your facial expressions, but even he couldn’t pick anything up. What you showed him seemed real. A real smile and real confidence, but he doubted that it was really the case given the present circumstances. But perhaps it wasn’t far fetched after all.

Bellatrix glared at you, but you held no air of worry or fear. Instead it was almost as if you were challenging her. Which left him wondering what in Merlin’s name had Pansy talked to you about.

Draco kept a close eye on you all night, but you really did seem alright. Curled up under his arm on the sofa in the company of just your friends, you were almost at ease. He itched to know what had happened between you and Pansy, but there was never a moment alone with just the two of you.

The night wound down, and soon it was only you, him, and his mother left in the large house. The both of you had drifted to the sitting room that held the grand piano. Draco’s fingers danced along the ivory keys, remembering how last Christmas he had composed for the first time. Your song was still remembered under his fingertips as it became a part of mini concert.

Christmas morning came and there were few presents under the tree, most of them trivial. Christmas seemed trivial. He had gotten a pack of permanent markers from Abby with a note saying that you would know what to do with them. You had gotten a pair of diamond earrings from him—and his mother. You both agreed, however, not to get each other anything. It was a depressing notion, but there was simply nothing to say about the occasion.

That evening, you donned your cloak and smiled at him softly.

“I’m gonna go visit Papa,” Your voice was soft and subtle. “Would you like to join me?”

His eyebrows shot up in surprise. He never expected for you to invite him to something like this. After the events of yesterday he didn’t feel worthy to go with you, let alone meet your father.

“It’s okay Draco, I can go alone,”

“No,” It was immediate. “You’re not going alone,”

Draco never thought that your father would be buried here. At Godric’s Hollow. He supposed it was a common place for wizards to be buried, but... he didn’t make the connection. There were others here as well and he could hear the faint hymns being sung at the church down the road. You and he were just cloaks in the crowd, two hoods visiting a loved one. You paused at a gravestone.

Walter Y/l/n

1956 — 1983

A Father and Husband

~Have Courage and Be Kind~

“Happy Christmas Papa,” You whispered softly, waving your wand, riding the gravestone of snow and frost. You sank to your knees, tears in your eyes and a smile on your lips. “I brought someone here to meet you,” Your fingertips brushed the stone. “This is Draco, Draco Malfoy. I know you probably don’t like the last name Papa, but... he is good,”

Tears welled in Draco’s eyes at the interaction. He stooped beside you, wrapping an arm around your shoulders.

“Hello,” His voice was tight. “You have a wonderful daughter,” A pause. “And though I cannot atone for my father’s mistakes, I will try. And I will be someone worthy of her affection and love,”

You laid your head on his shoulder, not saying anything, but rather enjoying the quiet night, the soft snow starting to fall. Drawing his wand, Draco conjured a small wreath of holly at the bed of the grave.

“He would be so proud of you,” Draco murmured. “As I am.”

“He would be proud of you too,” You looked up at him, snowflakes on your eyelashes. “We should go before the snow gets worse. I can feel it growing dangerous,”

Draco’s eyes darted around to the other mourners in dark colors that made only your silver cloak stand out when his eyes landed on a rather large focal statue. You followed his gaze and stood, standing.

“Do you think Harry has ever...?” The question was soft.

“I don’t think he knows it’s here,” Draco answer truthfully, his brows tugging together.

He led you down the rows of headstones until you were before Lily and James’ gave. It was sobering, seeing it like this. Draco knew the legends and stories, of course, but looking at the small bundle etched in the stone, cradled in Lily’s arms, it seemed almost too real. With your wand, you used the same spell and cleared the grave of frost and snow.

“As much of a prick that he is...” You trailed off. “I hope he’s having a good Christmas,” 

Draco hummed in acknowledgement.

___________________________________

Narcissa greeted us at the door to the Manor. A warning in her eyes. The warning, proven to be in vain because nothing could prepare us for what was awaiting inside. The treacherous smile of Bellatrix greeted us, as she was flanked by two others, in hoods and masks—deeming them unidentifiable. Even though I had seen her the night before, her civility seemed to have vanished.

“The young prince returns, dear sister,” Bellatrix cooed. “But he has not been such a good young prince now has he?” She twirled her wand in her hand as Draco took a step in front of me, his own wand out.

“Bellatrix,” A steady recognizable voice called.

My eyes snapped to the right where Snape stood. His nonchalant demeanor almost blending in with the gloom that hung in the air.

“You know his fate, Bellatrix,” Snape did not attempt to stop her, but something held in his words accomplished the feat.

“Yes,” Her head cocked to one side as she drawled out the word. “But he is not above the Dark Lord’s law. And that goes for his harlot.”

“You will not speak to her like that,” Draco spat, growling.

I placed a hand on his shoulder. I could handle some name calling. I was just desperately trying to figure out Bellatrix’s game and why she had come back and why the hell Snape was here too.

“You know, you might have gotten away with it, little tramp, had the Ministry and that blood traitor Weasley stepped in and torn through the enchantments,” The purr fell from her lips. “And Cissy you should really know better than to leave me alone anywhere,”

Bellatrix waved her wand and I felt unseen hands grab my arms and drag me forward, to the center of the foyer, and then they were gone, causing me to stumble onto my knees. I glowered up at the witch, picking myself up and drawing my wand.

“Bellatrix!” This time it was Narcissa.

“Worry not little sister,” The witch stalked up to me, her wand tracing along the scar that resided under my shirt: from her knife the last time we had met. “She is in no harm... The Dark Lord has plans for her after all... But I am afraid that her possessions...”

My eyes went wide. I shoved the idea that the Dark lord had plans for me and finally figured out her game. The reason she was here.

My room in the manor. Filled with my muggle books, and records, and photos... Everything I had left from the family and home I no longer had.

“Yes, little pet.” Bellatrix snapped. “But I wanted to take this as a learning opportunity. That the Dark Lord will expect nothing less than perfection—dedication.”

“Bellatrix, please—” I started, only for my voice to be taken by a flick of her wand. 

“You will be silent, little toad,” She snapped.

I turned, and saw Draco standing with his mother, pure fury written on his face as Narcissa held him back. As much as I yearned for his touch and comfort, I knew that this had to be played very carefully for us to survive. His eyes met mine.

“Come, come,” The deranged witched cooed almost happily.

Draco wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me along beside him. I looked up at him with frantic questions in my eyes, but he just shook his head. Though I couldn't hear the others behind us, I was sure they were there. Standing at the door of what was once my room, I saw the scattered books, torn pages, and absolute destruction that was in the room’s wake. Tears welled in my eyes at the sight. Draco’s and Narcissa’s arms around me were the only thing that held me back from running forward to save something—anything.

“Draco,” Bellatrix motioned him forward. Rigidly he let me go and took a step forward.

“The Dark Lord and every Death Eater believes that Purebloods are superior. That Muggles are filth and should not be considered human. And yet you allow such scum in your house. Muggle scum.” Bellatrix turned to Draco. “Destroy them. Prove your loyalty, little prince.”

Narcissa’s arms became a vice grip, holding me up instead of holding me back. I ducked into her shoulder, not being able to bring myself to watch what I knew had to be done.

“Confringo,”

Time passed. I wasn’t sure how much time. Maybe seconds... maybe an hour. Everything froze around me. My lung burned for oxygen. My eyes saw nothing. There was nothing left for me to see. Nothing but destruction in wake.

________________________________

“Draco give her mind time to protect itself,” Snape’s calm voice chided, watching the young boy pace outside the room you were in, nursed by Narcissa.

“No.” He snapped. “She—Fuck she’s going to hate me! Do you realize what I’ve just done!” He nearly screeched. “I’ve just destroyed everything—”

“And rightfully so!” Snape hissed. “Do you think the Dark Lord would be as forgiving as Bellatrix? If he came here and saw such things?” Snape’s eyes narrowed. “If it weren’t for the Dark Lord’s plans for her, she’d be under a gravestone by now.”

“Plans for her!?” Draco rushed his teacher, wand out. “No. He doesn’t touch her.” The threat was malicious and icy.

“It is out of your hands,” Snape merely brushed Draco’s wand away. “Has today not been enough for you to understand that there is no other choice for you here?”

Draco took a cool step back. “Crystal.”

The door opened and two pairs of eyes snapped and fell upon a weary Narcissa.

“She is awake,” Her voice wavered slightly. Narcissa walked forward and placed a hand on her son’s shoulder. “She’s asking for you,”

Ice ran through Draco’s veins as dread filled his chest. Maybe this was it. Maybe this was goodbye. Maybe this finally broke you. It’s what he dreaded the most, but knew it was coming.

You were sitting up, on the edge of the bed, your gaze cast to the floor. 

“Y/n, please, you have to—”

You held your hand up and shook your head.

“Books... can be bought again. So, can records...”

“But they—I...”

“Draco,” You called, squeezing your eyes shut. “I know.” Your voice was curt. “I know, but right now, if I dwell on that...”

He nodded and looked down.

“Can you ever forgive me?” Tears welled in his eyes as he sat beside. “Please forgive me,”

“You had no choice,” Your voice was small. “They’re just... things.” Your eyes still didn’t open. “They’re trying to break us. Break me. The Dark Lord has plans for me,” You almost scoffed. “Like I’m his pawn. Like I belong to him!” You stood pacing the room. “Well you know what? He can watch me bleed, he can watch me burn, but I will not give in!” Your voice was vehement. “I—won’t—break,”

Draco gaped at you, utterly shocked. This was... new. This was different. This was also the first time that he had ever seen you so adamantly speak against the Dark Lord with such fervor. A kind of courage that he wished he possessed. A determination that made him believe that maybe, if nothing else, you would get through this. It gave him hope that maybe he would too.

You sat beside him again and took a deep breath, running a hand through your hair. 

“How are you feeling?” You voice was gentle and soft.

“Shouldn’t I be asking you that?” A small smile touched his lips.

A shrug fell from your shoulders and your hand ran up and along his left arm. The action alone eased the ache of the magic etched into his skin.

“I hate what I am,” He confessed through tears. “I hate what I’ve done and what I have to do. I... I don’t want to kill anyone. I don’t want to hurt anyone,” Sobs wracked his frame. “And I don’t know how you’re getting through this so well because I’m just breaking. I’m broken.”

Your arms wrapped around him, head resting on his shoulder.

“And that’s okay,” You pressed a kiss to his shoulder. “Go ahead and break. You’ve been strong too long, Draco.” Your hand ran through his hair.

He clung to you desperately, sobbing into your shoulder, hiding there. And he did break. He broke on you. He came apart at the seams in your hands and you held him together.

“I—I don’t w-want to kill him,” He sniveled. “W-why haven’t you tried to stop me?” He started to hiccup from the lack of oxygen.

You took his shoulders and looked him in the eye.

“Deep breath,” You instructed and took an exaggerated breath waiting for him to follow suit. It was shaky and ragged, but Draco managed a couple. “And because I wanted you to figure that out on your own. I wanted you to make that choice,” Your thumb brushed away his tears. “And I’m so proud of you for making it,”

He nodded and collapsed back into your arms a sense of relief flooding through him despite the threats that closed in from all sides.

__________________________________

“M-miss?”

It was early January when the house-elf came to me, clutching something in her hands tightly. Cassie, I thought was her name.

“Yes?” I knelt down, a soft demeanor to the action.

“I—I am—” She started to hyperventilate, tears in her wide eyes.

“It’s alright, sweetheart,” I soothed softly. “I won’t hurt you, nor tell you to hurt yourself. You’re safe in my presence,” I held my hands out, a slow action, showing the cowering house elf that they were empty and held no threat.

“I—I have been a b-bad house elf,” She cried. “I s-stole from M-miss,”

I frown furrowed my brows. I couldn’t think of anything that I owned that was worth stealing. A depressing thought tacked on that I didn’t own anything worthwhile even to me at the moment.

“It’s alright,” I smiled something sad.

The house elf held out what she was clinging too.

My photo album, the gift from Abby last Christmas. Tears sprung in my eyes as I hastily snatched the book from the house elf’s grasp.

“P-p-please do n-n-not be cross with C-C-Cassie,” The elf sobbed. “S-she likes l-l-looking at the p-p-pictures of h-h-happy mom-ments.”

“Oh, I’m not mad,” I quickly rushed out. “Not even in the slightest,” Tears streamed down my face. “You saved this,” I set the album down and drew the elf into a hug that she tried to scramble from but eventually relaxed, sobbing into my shoulder. “Thank you, thank you.” I cried.

“P-P-Please do not tell Master D-Draco,” She sniveled. “Y-Y-You have a-a-always been k-k- kind to us e-e-e-elves, p-p-please,”

“Y/n?” Draco’s voice was concerned. “Tell me what?” Cassie squawked and hid behind me, cowering. 

“M-m-m-master D-Draco,” The elf stammered apologies.

“What’s going on?” Draco was reserved, a mask of calm.

“Cassie, she saved my album.” I ran my fingers over the leather cover. “She took it from my room I guess... said she liked to look at the photos,”

Shock and relief flitted across Draco’s face in waves. He knelt down beside me and brought the book into his hands tears in his eyes.

“Thank you,” He spoke softly to the house elf. “Thank you for saving what I couldn’t,” 

“Draco,” I chided softly, reaching out for him. “It wasn’t your fault,”

“Regardless if it was or not,” He turned his attention back to the house elf. “You have my deepest gratitude,”

I flipped to a worn page by my own hand, to a day last year in the snow of four friends laughing and smiling. It wasn’t much, but I supposed it was something to believe in.

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Chapter 9

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Masterlist

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Tags: @coffee-addicti @msmcsmutt @ravn-87 @artemismohr18@whygz @crazywritingbug @fuzzy-panda @bitemebro522@zombiesnips-blog @savingdraco@welcometomyworldwithoutrules@akari180 @slytherin-emerald@memalfoy-spidey@queenfeatherwings @fanficflaneuse @go-whovian-universe@spicyshenanigans @darling-im-not-okay-i-promise @dietkiwi@katsukink @takemetothekingdom @strangerr-things @tmnt-queen @hxneybgb @justsomerandomgur@belcvayelena@moviesbooksandfandoms @howdycharlie@xtrashmouthxtozierx@cocochanelthepupper @ninacotte@braelynn-j @jiggllyy@honeymarvel @darcypottah@atomicpunkrock @thiccheerioss@lottie289 @boredashaeck@beautiful-pegasus @tceedlmao@deadlynyghtshayde@iconjuresnapeingrandmaclothes@anonymous034 @bi-andready-tocry @lunna-does-real-doodle@dragonsandbread @okaydraco@the-queen-of-hell-things@cmxreader @alienmotel @oh-itsnothing  @sunflowerxsadnessw @fattycooter@angelotakunerd08 @thisisahugemistake@fanficsigottaread@gweaslvy @strawberriesonsummer @gaysludge@cleopatera@ray-of-sunrise @artist-bby @shadowsingeraxolotl@peters-legos@quillsareforwriting @ghostlytoadalmondhairdo@wollymalfoy@lilpieceoftoast @paper-cats @floweryjh @sdicapriox@slothgirl22@peachesandpinks @monimillion @hufflautia @livize75@annie-mcl@riathearora @live-like-luna @justathoughtfulangel@coconutdawn@skteaiy @wannabeskinny-thinspo@naughtygranger​ @queenofmankind​ @dragonsandbread​ @abundantxadorations​ @moony-artnstuff​ @myforeveryoungblog​ @and-then-a-girl-with-luv​ @1-800-luvsick​ @pandas-rice-field​ @strawberriesonsummer​ @jjustsomerandomgirl​ @mrvlfangirl3190​ @loverbbgirlsblog​ @in-slytherin-we-trust​ @emmaa-t​ @introvertedrae​ @infinity1o1​ @stoleurmomsvan​ @echpr​ @sunkissed-hufflepuff @dekulover​ @marshmallowtraver​ @cereuselle​

[thamepo]

Venji has always been endgame: Benji’s attraction to Victor

the first thing I really need people to understand is that Benji is not watching the show, he’s not seeing things through Victor’s point of view, and for the most part of the season he has no idea Victor is struggling with his sexuality. from Benji’s point of view, Victor is straight and into Mia. that’s how I’m going to be analyzing his thoughts and actions (well, guessing mostly because he does lack screen time and insight moments. hopefully we’ll get more of him in season two!!)

btw I’m gonna break it down episode by episode because I’m insane (and I also feel strangely connected to Benji so don’t @ me)

Episode 1 - Welcome to Creekwood

as I’ve mentioned before, you can interpret Benji’s “nice shoes!” line as interest. but even if you’re not willing to do that, I still think it’s valid to consider that he might’ve felt some kind of immediate connection to Victor (if episodes 2 and 3 are any indication of that. and the Call Me Maybe lyrics).

Episode 2 - Stoplight Party

the “Benji attempts to teach Victor how to make a espresso” scene is very much about Victor’s attraction to Benji so I don’t wanna look too much into it. also Benji comes off as (at least for me!) a very attentive and loving person, so his dedication to teaching Victor felt very genuine. but still like...... he did get lost in Victor’s eyes for a moment before the milk spilled akdjksdjjs

then at the end of the episode Benji calls Victor late at night (he even apologizes for that) when he could’ve called Victor at any other time or could’ve just told him at school. and well, (I may be reaching here but headcanons are always good!!) I like to believe Benji couldn’t stop thinking about Victor, which is why he decided to call. for some unknown reason he already feels connected to Victor and wanted to hear his voice and—

let me stop here before I write a whole fanfic because that’s not the purpose of this post.

Episode 3 - Battle of the Bands

oh boy, I’m gonna try to unpack this episode, hopefully I’ll make some sense. I’m very sorry if I fail!

so, Victor and Benji have the Call Me Maybe (cutest) moment, in which Victor tells Benji that he’s going on a date with Mia the next day.

Now. I need you to remember that Victor explicitly told Benji that he and Mia wouldn’t go to the Battle of the Bands and that Benji had already performed when Victor got there and only performed again because his band won the battle (so I’m pretty sure Victor wasn’t supposed to hear the Call Me Maybe cover). therefore this wasn’t Benji confessing his feelings to Victor. if anything, I believe it was his way of dealing with the intense and ever-growing feelings that he has for Victor through his biggest passion (music), pretty much like making a reference to something that you know no one else will understand (since for everyone else it’s just a Carly Rae Jepsen bop).

but then Victor eventually shows up and hears Benji singing Call Me Maybe and for him it’s definitely not just a Carly Rae Jepsen bop anymore. it’s their song

after the performance, it looks like Benji is going to talk to him about it, maybe to try and make it seem like it’s no big deal (since he thinks Victor is into Mia, and he himself is in a long term relationship) but Derek appears and we’re all left heartbroken (Simon & his friends included).

what I’m trying to say is: they are two halves of the same idiot. while Victor is in denial of his sexuality and attraction to Benji, Benji is in denial of his growing feelings for Victor. we love this denial duo

Episode 4 - The Truth Hurts

not much to say about this one BUT. at the beginning of the episode you can see how Victor and Benji are working totally in sync, to the point where they barely need words like the freaking soulmates that they are. honestly, I’m done pretending they aren’t soulmates because this show just kept shoving that into our faces over and over and if you failed to see it then it’s not my problem (or maybe it is since I’m literally spending my time trying to explain exactly that. but I just care too much about these two and I want people to understand why).

then Derek calls and Benji picks up lovingly because he’s a loving person and a caring boyfriend and even though he might be struggling with his feelings for Victor, he’s not about to neglect his boyfriend (shame we can’t say the same thing about Derek) (no I will not stop throwing shade at him).

Episode 5 - Sweet Sixteen

I could try and say several things about this one but for real, BENJI DREW VICTOR AND GAVE HIM THE DRAWING AS A BIRTHDAY GIFT. like! this stupidly artistic boy!!!!!!!!! this stupidly caring boy!!!!!!!!! he could’ve bought Victor literally anything or not even bothered to think of a gift At All, but he took the time to DRAW VICTOR LIKE ONE OF HIS FRENCH BOYS!!!!! what am I supposed to do with this knowledge!!!!

now I’m imagining Benji observing Victor. the way the light hits his face, how his shoulders move, the shape of his hands....... all the while telling himself it’s just to draw Victor!!!!! but that’s still beautiful and frankly thirsty nonetheless.

p.s I was robbed of a scene like that.

Episode 6 - Creekwood Nights

not much to say about this one except the show blatantly telling us that Derek can be real shitty sometimes. also, I wanna talk about Venji’s dynamics throughout the show so bad but it deserves a post of its own so I’m gonna hold my tongue.

Episode 7 - What Happens In Willacoochee

(stays in Willacoochee or maybe it will haunt your gay ass all the way to New York).

oh boy, this is where shit starts going down for real.

so Victor kisses Benji. I’m not going to defend Victor because what he did was reckless and dumb and frankly disrespectful. but I need to say that it was going to happen sooner or later because when you repress something too hard and for too long, it’s bound to come back with full force and explode in your face. I really wish it was in a different circumstance, of course, but also life isn’t always made of perfect situations and shit happens. (and nope, that does not excuse Victor’s actions).

now think about Benji. he’s been struggling with his feelings for Victor, who as far as he knows is straight and in a relationship, and then suddenly Victor kisses him. my best guess (due to his reaction to Victor’s speech in episode 10) is that he thinks Victor isn’t being serious about it, that in no moment that kiss meant anything but curiosity and recklessness, when they both have people to lose (again, he doesn’t know that Victor struggles with his sexuality, much less that Victor has feelings for him).

so yeah, I believe Benji was upset, not only with Victor though, but with himself.

(I’ll come back to this in a second)

no Benji in episode 8 so.......

Episode 9 - Who The Hell Is B

Benji decides to leave the coffee shop. Victor tells him that the kiss wasn’t his fault and Benji says that being around Victor makes him feel guilty, now why is that?

firstly because he’s not a psychopath and the fact that he cheated on Derek makes him feel guilty. but I do believe that that’s not the only thing that makes him feel guilty. deep down he liked kissing Victor. he likes Victor, he’s been doing his best to keep that buried but Victor had to go and complicate things, so now the only way to avoid making a bigger mess is staying as far away as possible from each other. so he runs back to the safety of his relationship with Derek.

(listen, I know the show makes it seem like Benji is super angry and wants nothing to do with Victor but I don’t believe that’s the case. he’s upset and feeling guilty for liking someone else, denial does make you act very hostile sometimes).

Episode 10 - Spring Fling

Benji’s denial continues but (thankfully) it won’t last much longer.

he goes to the bathroom and tells Victor that he’s read his letter and that he does forgive him for kissing him but that that doesn’t change anything, that it’s best for them to stay away from each other.

that’s until he hears Victor’s speech to Derek (which was more to Benji than Derek so). that’s the moment he realizes that Victor actually likes him, that the kiss as cursed as it was had meant something, that they both feel exactly the same thing. that’s what gives him courage to finally accept that he can’t be with Derek anymore because his heart belongs to someone else. (has belonged to Victor from the moment they met) akdjskdjsj someone please tell me to shut up

which leads us to the bench kiss(es) scene. now, these boys are a whole mess because Victor was still technically dating Mia (he did try to come out to her before, couldn’t do it so he decided to come out after the Spring Fling) (good intention, poor execution).

But I also believe this was just lazy writing and they wanted to have a scene where Mia catches Victor and Benji together. it could’ve been done better, they could’ve been just touching foreheads or something but they wanted the full drama so the kiss(es) happened. I’m taking 50 points away from the writers for this. (also does not excuse Victor or Benji since they literally met halfway. these idiots are so in love wtf!)

(I still love them though, and hope they do better in the future, for themselves and for each other).

anyway, I think that’s it! if you read up until this point: thank you so much!!!! I tried my best to understand and explain Benji since the show said fuck Benji stans. hope this helps!

— love, MJ