#really insecure in some kinda way | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

whatego · 1 year ago

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Also wtffff pay attention to me :(((

.. The (not too long lasting) urge to ghost people just because they don't give me much attention or/and don't respond to me right away, plus projecting my insecurities onto them/fearing their possible hidden judgments - is Real.

#🎤🛜#Yes I know people have lives + people care about me + my brain is going blank but basically ik the world doesn't revolve around me #but sometimes I wish it did a bit whenever I'd want it to #OH and when I'm feeling socially insecure/getting rejection sensitivity dysphoria big time #I wouldn't ghost someone ever unless if like.. They were dangerous to my wellbeing or some shit.#+ I value talking things out/regulating my emotions/the good stuff y'know?#beung honest and vulnerable whenever I'm ready/feel safe enough #being*#-- Or sometimes instead of that urge I just feel sad or mild anger + ''>:p fine!! Meanie ass/fuckhead... 🙄'' + once in a while mild #arrogance - the arrogance/superiority thingy (idk what to call it) only really happens towards ppl I remember who've hurt/made me feel #really insecure in some kinda way #though. Also - this is coming from a person who's more humble and rarely tries to attention seek (or.. Maybe just overtly?)#Hell - I used to think I was *better* than attention seeking people and couldn't stand it. Now I can understand mult. reasons why ppl do #that though and don't think so harshly about it #btw Yes ik what cognitive distortions are!... Gonna add that to my pinned post actually #What having a minimal amnt of socialization/semi-involuntary isolation and ableist xps/trauma/double empathy issues does to a mf

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seventh-district · 1 month ago

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“Why’s he call you Darlin’?”

on my knees begging my brain to stop trying to associate this song with Sam

#(it’s too late guys i’ve already added it to a couple playlists. i can’t help it)#redacted audio #redacted asmr #redacted sam #redacted darlin #rp audio stuff #Seven’s Blorbo Songs #music stuff #i fell down a rabbit hole of music videos on YT last night and decided to give this song a chance based on the title obviously #skipped through all the exposition just to quickly find out if i liked the song or not #and as soon as the first line came in i went head-in-hands at my desk bc i just Knew it was over for me #i hate that i like it #it’s very repetitive and giving strong Modern/Mainstream Pop-Rap-Country vibes #but i’m not too proud to admit that i eat that shit up on occasion #‘You’ve been beatin’ ‘round the bush so much you’re knockin’ off the leaves.’ goes kinda hard tho i’m ngl #‘ole boy in a Ridgeline and i drive a Chevy’ would Sam be a truck elitist? hmm #i doubt it. i see him as too practical-minded to care about brand names and shit like that #like irl i think it’s very silly. and perhaps a little questionable to hate on a ‘foreign’ vehicle. but i don’t even like trucks at all so #insecure country boys and their obsession with big trucks are ruining the road for us regular people that just want a normal ass car #but i’ll stop before i go off on a rant about america’s transportation problems #anyways. i can separate reality from fiction and i love the image of Sam in a beat up beloved old truck. cliché as it may be #getting back on track. my POINT was that the song doesn’t even necessarily fit Sam’s vibes i just. can’t undo the association #been trying to think of a way for it to fit him but that would require Darlin’ to be cheating on him and i don’t like that thought #like i love some types of angst but cheating isn’t one of them #i could view it through the context of being directed at Alexis bc i already hate her lmao but once again it doesn’t fit in canon #and i don’t know how i feel about the thought that he used to call her Darlin’ too. though it’s very possible. mmm angst #not that it has to fit with canon for me to attach a song to a character. certainly not! but i need to make it work in my mind Somehow #and i can’t even come up with a good HC to make this fit. the idea of Jealous!Sam is fun in theory but idk if i’d like it practice anyways #tldr: does this really fit canon Sam? meh. Is it forever tied to him in my mind anyways due to the use of the petname Darlin’? absolutely.#anywho. one of these days i’ll open this app to do something other than vent post or yap abt rp audio blorbos. but that day is not today!

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memoriamp4 · 11 months ago

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I can't stop thinking about how Astrid says to Hiccup "Figure out which side you're on", and a short while later, after bonding with Toothless, he goes to the cove with the full intent of running away with Toothless. He chose his side and it wasn't Berk or his father, it was Toothless, a dragon that he was taught to fear his entire life. It's really sad to think about the fact that Hiccup had been treated so terribly his whole life that he was going to run away with a dragon that he had known for maybe a month. And it didn't even seem like Hiccup had any difficulty choosing Toothless over Berk/Stoick

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dennistakesamentalhealthday · 1 year ago

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dennis is an angry character btw im sorry but he is full of rage but that rage is not exclusive his anger does not negate sadness and fragility and insecurities in fact they work together and dtamhd was one of the first times where his anger was not used as a joke via a surface level rage explosion from him but instead explored the fragility of his anger. the way he keeps reassuring the workers he encounters (and himself) that he's not mad. when he tells daisy he's not mad but he is a little bit upset. dennis is angry and that anger is what makes him so fragile. he was upset and it manifested as rage bc he doesnt know what to do with his own sadness

#disclaimer tags yes i would like to see his emotions explored more but i disagree that we ONLY saw anger in dtamhd #and EVEN IF IT WAS ONLY ANGER... anger is just as VALID and fragile and vulnerable as sadness. they are family #we saw how his anger makes him fragile how it exhausts him #how it works with his stress and fears and insecurities and sadness #he was UPSET!!!!#angry dennis in dtamhd WAS big feelings dennis in tends bar. that was the same #he expressed anger in tends bar bc he was upset he expressed anger in dtamhd bc he was upset etc etc #and i think the sadness people were expecting was present. the sadness and fragility we would have seen if he cried on the beach like most #of us anticipated (btw he did cry at the beach <3 technically <3) was THERE. it was just in his anger #sewerkingcharlie talked about this already and worded it very well but im honestly kinda bothered by how some people have treated #the portrayal of anger and emotions in this ep #you dont have to like the ep or how they portrayed dennis but some posts have really given the vibe of #his anger and his emotional outburst not being as valid because it wasnt portrayed in the way you expected #or that it wasnt palatable enough #and honestly if you dont like it thats okay! but can we please be careful with how we talk about mental illness and anger outbursts!#yes it is frustrating when people ONLY see dennis' anger or see dennis' anger in a very shallow way #which a lot of the audience unfortunately does because its been treated like a joke #but it wasnt a just a joke here #and maybe this will all go past dudebros heads frankly i dont give a shit lol but thats for another post

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tittyinfinity · 14 days ago

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contemplating deleting my blog soon I might make a new blog but idk

#.bdo #i just need to work on some insecurity issues is all. been on a long self journey this year #can't shake the feeling that every time i say anything it's wrong somehow #and there is some reality to that. i have been wrong several times I've even been downright mean to people over misunderstandings #i just haven't been able to break out of the habit of feeling permanently embarrassed about every small mistake I've ever made #& old insecurities from my childhood are resurfacing #like when i was a kid/teen and no one would ever tell me when i was breaking social cues but they'd make fun of me behind my back #i have 3200 followers and most of my posts get 0 notes sometimes i get 1-5 so it makes me feel like I'm doing something wrong #i end up deleting a lot of them...#almost every post of mine that's gone viral was just a screenshot or picture saved from somewhere else....#and the times that i have gotten attention over a post that stands up for people who aren't like me it makes me terrified #that i look like i'm trying to play a savior role or like i'm virtue signaling #i have a few good mutuals who i love so much and that's why I'm still here #it's also the only social media i use currently #but it does really hurt when i put a lot of thought into something like spending hours making a funny meme or a thoughtful post #just to find out that the only people who find them interesting is my extremely small circle on here if anyone at all #it's so dumb i shouldn't be feeling like this over fucking numbers....it's not even real #i find a little bit of (petty) solace in the fact that there are people on here who are loudly and repeatedly saying way more embarrassing #shit than I've ever said #but even then when i know someone is absolutely wrong it makes me feel nervous like what if im the next person to fuck up that bad #and i find out through public ridicule #well that actually kinda did happen on here once but not on that scale #last year i sent someone something i thought was funny and they sent back an 'ok'#and then immediately made a huge long post about how you shouldn't talk to strangers like you're already friends #called it parasocial behavior...got tens of thousands of notes and i knew it was about me...#i wholeheartedly agree some people go too far with parasocial behavior but i never fully understood what part of what i said/did was wrong #and i went back to feeling like the kid who never found out they were doing something wrong until they heard that they got made fun of #i don't even attempt to make new friends on my own on here anymore because i'm terrified of that happening again #almost all of the people I've become friends with on here came to me first and i love and appreciate them for that #but even then i feel too nervous to socialize that often bc i never find out/realize that i fuck up until later on

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bijoumikhawal · 1 month ago

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*sees a long post from an American comparing Cardassia to the USSR/China* *rolls eyes and keeps scrolling*

#cipher talk #It's not that I think those are bad comparisons #It's that I don't trust white American liberals to make them and when yall do it tends to leave a bad taste in my mouth #Kinda veers into orientalism (and yes this is a factor in how Americans and Western Europe views Russia for shitty reasons)#As well as a weird fascination combined with loathing towards leftists that's just gross to be around #I don't even especially like the USSR or some of China's policies post revolution #Including the tendency some people have toward Han supremacy #But Cardassia is a Mish mash of whatever is scary to white progressive men in the 90s #And includes inspiration from the Ottoman British and Japanese empires as well as the Nazis who were Not Communists #So primarily analyzing Cardassia as a communist nation really is just. Foolish? Because they're also compared to fascists #Especially because we don't ACTUALLY know anything about Cardassian economics or much detail about politics #We know they venerate the family (which rings true for Chinese Japanese and Ottoman comparisons)#We know they have a military led ruling class that tries to balance with the Detapa council; military ruling class is not really like #A communist thing it's a dictatorship/authoritarian/fascist thing. A lot of African countries have or had those #Almost none of us are 'communist' in a meaningful way. At best Nasser was a socialist and that's not the same #And you can infer there's classism even from alpha Canon as well as food insecurity #If anything I think a pretty pressing comparison to Cardassia as a whole is they're Turks.#And even that is vague and stretches a bit because they weren't DESIGNED with that much intention #They were designed to be scary and not with a specific ideology and economic policy #If they were designed with such specifics by a politically informed person you would NOT have references to the Nazis alongside references #To communism because those two things are actually the opposite economic/political policy #And the ways they commit atrocities such as genocide or extend neocolonial influence aren't the same!#China for example has a VERY different stance to the US when it does that to the point where many Africans vastly prefer #To deal with Chinese companies because there's a material benefit from it even though Africans are often not getting a good deal #This doesn't make those dealings 'good' but it goes to show how just having a political history recently rooted in communism #Impacts how a government approaches things #Any government unfortunately is capable of genocide colonialism and imperialism. Resistance to those things is not simple.

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mortiflyer · 20 days ago

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#i don't write fanfic and don't have an interest in it but i kinda wish i did bc i'm a writer and i feel weird posting original work that i #legit want to submit for publication on like. ao3 that is nawt my territory. but also. specifically it's so easy to build a fandom bc there #already is one so if you write enough fanfic then fans of that media will translate to fans of...you...anyways. airing some #confusion about self promo...wouldn't call it frustration per se bc i have somewhat aggressive insecurity abt my work. this also applies #to traditional art bc i'm a painter but i don't put a lot of effort into fanart (not disdainful i just have a lot of personal concepts i #prefer to develop bc ik i have the tools to do so) so when i post my paintings they basically get stranded #bc they aren't always of a popular character which is not tumblr's fault i get wanting to see art of specifically your Blorbo #BUT WHERE DO I POST ABT MY JOAN OF ARC PAINTING I'M ALMOST DONE WITH...#LIKE THERE IS NO TUMBLR FANDOM FOR MISS JOAN hnnngrrrhrhh #en ee ways idk if this is necessarily a vent but how tf do i build an audience who wants to see my original work without starting from a #place of derivation...should i just suck it up and make arcane fanart and write homophobic athlete gay sex #WELL. that was really long kiss kiss mutuals.#me yapping

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myplasticadversary · 9 months ago

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In all my inane Sheatles rambling I still sometimes wonder if I would feel differently about Yoko if she was a man and John was a woman, and to be honest I don't think it would really change that much for me. I think Yoko would've probably had a better shot at being treated as a legitimate artist, but on the other hand a lot of other folks would likely drag him through the mud for "ruining" or "trapping" poor girl John all the same. I don't know necessarily how the shifted social power dynamics would affect things that happened between them, if it would make Yoko's psychological fuckery worse or what, but ultimately I think I'd still be inclined to defend girl John's agency and she'd still be a beloved famous white woman with plenty of her own problems and lousy behavior to acknowledge.

#maybe it's kinda pointless to muse on idk #all in all i enjoy their androgynous slay and how they can be both awful and sweet and are both very sad insecure broken people #and I'll always say he sought her out because that's what he wanted for better or worse #and i believe she really did care for him even if she didn't always express her feelings palatably #little silly tangent but considering all the people who pathologize her as being a sociopath or whatever i personally could easily see her #being autistic or some kind of neurodivergent #or it could just be the awkwardness of shifting between cultures/languages and a generally dysfunctional upbringing. who knows #either way a lot of her oddities resonate with me #sheatles universe #yoko ono #john lennon

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britneyshakespeare · 8 months ago

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Man is saying weird things to me again

#help mom he's oversharing about drinking scotch every evening #that's very on brand for Man #tales from diana #i literally did Nothing to reach out to him i don't know what he wants #i was just thinking in the shower literally not even half an hour ago about how you know it's strange #he used to always have this way of talking to me like he was trying to impress me which is just kinda silly honestly #like i was a 20-21-year-old in awe of him and he was a retired male model eight years older than me w more life experience #and some rather exotic and interesting experiences at that #i think he somewhat envies that i seem (at least to him) like a self-possessed 'intellectual'#thats how he talks to me at least. it's funny tho #not that im not. like. smart. i think the both of us know i'm better-read than he'll be in 3 lifetimes #and i'm not quite self-possessed but i certainly don't have the open-wounded insecurity he does #while also being rather more confident than most ppl in some areas (and it's not ALL unearned)#he's got much more ambition than i do though. more ambition than i'll have in 10 lifetimes #and he seems to do everything with a motivation of external validation and approval.#so i think he has a chip on his shoulder. poor little Man #the two of us could not be more opposite. but i don't really strive to be like him in the ways he strives to be like me #he chases this dream of what he thinks the perfect man is and it's quite inhuman so of course he falls short.#i on the other hand am if anything much TOO accepting of my own faults and shortcomings. ahem #these are all things i will never say to Man. he's too silly to hear it #besides. im rather sure he likes me (? in some way) and i am these days just very ambivalent to him #i can't NOT say i find him attractive bc i do but he's just. sooooo not the one lol #he's a fascinating creature all flaws aside but i never find myself studying him at my own volition #Man just comes outta the woods sometimes to tell me about his travels or women or whiskey. he's odd #he's very eccentric but between the two of us i think i'm the better eccentric. no wonder he visits me sometimes #but he brings gifts and prayers like he's coming to a devotional shrine or something. i'm like sir this is not a temple #he'll never be normal but he is so strange in the ways i'm too good for. if i do say so myself #(and that's saying something bc i'm not too good for ANYTHING)

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maliro-t · 3 months ago

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as a bona fide vaxleth lover i am more confused than ever about how they are portrayed on the animated series i'm not gonna lie 😭

#not that different is bad like it doesn't affect or 'ruin' the actual source material #i just legitimately do not understand some of their choices here #there's stuff i really like ofc but u know. i've written multiple long analyses about conflict in their relationship #and in previous seasons it seemed to me like they were just smoothing out those sharp edges which bummed me out ngl #(for one there was a line at the end of s1 where kiki directly contradicted her campaign self in favor of No Conflict that i was feeling #unsatisfied with. and s2 didn't contend with rq as a sticking point for keyleth really at all)#and like to be honest my distaste for that is biased by like fandom drama of years past and people shitting on them for that exact stuff #so for me it kinda felt like an updated and palatable version that appealed to the group of people that made me feel bad for liking them #which is again like a strong personal bias lol but u know it also is just. a really important story to me that i love #but this season it's like they went no no. they do actually need to fight that was a big thing. hmmmm what about #AH YES. let's reverse their povs about their relationship completely.#have not finished ep3 yet but 10 min in i'm just like HUH?#again this doesn't rly matter and the show remains an enjoyable adaptation it's just truly bizzare to me 😭 how did this choice get made #it speaks #lovm spoilers #sorry I'm not done yet actually because the specific conflict about happiness in the present being or not being worth sorrow later #is the VERY CORE OF BOTH OF THOSE CHARACTERS and to switch which one feels which is way more than weird for the romance it's weird for like #what each of their whole individual deal is. that's why i'm so ??????????????#gah. i truly don't want to complain too badly #(and tbh the eps simply don't have enough runtime for vax to be as completely-falling-apart as he actually was and the role of #depression and trauma and self-loathing in that vs like. a more easily telegraphed supernatural boogeyman #-which if they slowed the pace down more might fit in but the scale of the story is so grand that they can't so like i begrudingly get it.#but still absolutely wild for the solution to be: do away with their actual arguments about divinity or keyleth's insecurity about #outliving all of vox machina. oh btw we are giving the vision she had of that to vax as a gift from rq or whatever #so he can be inscure about it instead. because he's fate touched or smthn. and that's too abstract for us to explore here so let's just #give him ominous visions.)#the more i have typed the saltier i have gotten i'm sorry it's just WILD TO MEEEE

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paleangels13 · 5 months ago

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Helloo, I still exist did anyone even notice I was mostly gone lol

Anyone interested in ehhh...slightly unhinged work-related talk?

No?

Well. Too bad

Anyone that knows me irl please ignore the tags – I'm embarrassed ✨🥰

#I said ignore the tags #please ignore them #I'm serious #alright soooo...i started this new job about 1 1/2 months ago... It's not great or anything neither is the payment but it's alright #also I can walk there from home bc it's so close by which is nice I guess #anywayyy it's a grocery store owned and run by a family (my boss and his wife + their 2 (3??) adult children)#now my boss is kinda hard to figure out I always think he's annoyed which makes me insecure but I think that's just how he is idk lol #but he isn't rude or anything (at least I never noticed??)#his wife seems nice and so does (one of) their daughter(s(?))#his son – who is idk probably in his early 30s?? could also be late 20s but I can't guess people's age – is the manager #he's nice as well I think and he even jokes around with (some of) the employees from time to time #either way...this is all rather irrelevant. Point is some part of me has decided to be uhhh weird about him in the past week ig #and I don't think that feeling was there before?? Idk I don't consider him attractive or anything (at least I don't think I do??) + he's #married (?? He's definitely taken) and has two children I think judging from his profile picture in our work-app at least and like I said #he could also be quite a bit older (I mean...yk)#anywayyy i am being weird about him and something within me turned into teenager mode or whatever and iiiiiiii don't know what to do lol #not that it's really a big deal I suppose it's just that he's my boss' son and my supervisor/manager/superior/?? which makes thoughts #outside of work weird (:#no i will not elaborate #alright tag rant over I'm not sure I really wanna post this this feels awkward to post publicly hah :')#will probably delete later #someone send help #((:

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dizzybevvie · 6 months ago

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#im to embarassed to talk abt him but omg im gonna EXPLODE #cutest boy EVER in the world EVER EVER EVER #his cute glasses and his pretty eyes and his smile lines and crows feet and the way the hairs at the front curl into a heart shape #the way he sits and the way he stands and the way he talks to his family and the way the big t shirts he wears sits on his waistband and #hes insecure about his body and his acne but hes literally so gorgeous I have no idea why he is #goddddd cutest boy in the worldddd i like him so much it makes me feel sick #at prom (26th june) he tied some loose fabric around my wrist and its still there now #his jeans i see him wear all the time cus theyre his favourite like he has favourite jeans im àaaaaaaaaaa #the way he throws his head back when he laughs and the specific “ha-HAA” laugh he does when he isnt expecting it #his stupid chai latte that he really likes #how he always has to say goodnight 3 times before he stops talking #how he uses the purple heart emoji rather than the regular ones #i had a dream once that we were laying in my bed when everyone was asleep just whispering and giggling and he left in a hurry back to-#wherever he was staying and we were laughing and when the door clicked behind him i just felt so light #UGH HES SO CUTE #his big dramatic expressions and how everything becomes a story #the stupid facial expression he pulls where his tongue goes out and hos eye brows arch when he makes any kind of dance move #the way he giggles when hes about to make a joke #(richie tozier voice) CUTE CUTE CUTE #omg his VOICE. oh my god. oh my god. oh my god man. oh god. help me. god be with me. please.#hes playing troy bolton rn so he keeps singing HSM and im just AAAAAAA I CANT. I CANTICANTICANT #the way his instinct is to grab my wrist/lower arm/hand whenever anything happens #OAIAHAUAGAH GUYS. GUYS I WILL NOT SURVIVEEEEE #his eyes are like. slanted? idk how to describe it but theyre lower on the outside and theyre soooooo gorgeous #ughhh both his eyes and hair are like so-dark brown theyre nearly black and its so fucking pretty i cant do this #at prom i had to lean in to talk to him & vice versa and at some point we were sat towards eachother with his legs kinda like barricading-#mine yk. ugh. he was so sweet and so cute the whole time. like helping me walk in the heels and opening doors for me and following me around #UGHHHH I CANT. GUYS. HELP.#☕#beverly says stuff

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byanyan · 1 year ago

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being friends with byan is so weird bc they say they want you to have the balls to be bluntly honest with them, but then the very moment you're honest about something they don't like, they're peacing out, all "lmao ok friendship ended byeeeee"

#honesty is great until you're addressing their insecurities or anything they're currently in denial over #they have a... weird relationship with honesty lmao #they'll be harshly honest about almost anything and not pull a single damn punch #they will tell you easily that their biological mother didn't want them and that they've lived on the street #they'll tell you that they haven't had a foster home last more than 10 months & that one of their foster parents almost killed them #but they won't tell you about the misery these events caused & how its shaped them as a person #and then there's the way they can dish it but can't take it #they'll tell you to your face everything that's wrong with you (in their opinion)#but the moment you do the same back.... lmao fuck you what the hell kinda bullshit #they're so SO sensitive. so much more so than they let on. and they don't tolerate being called on their shit well.#but I think part of that is bc they spent a lot of their life being belittled rather than built up #and they ended up feeling like every time they were abandoned it was bc of their flaws #so if ur pointing them out........ it's only a matter of time before ur leaving too. so they better leave first.#but also they just hate being Seen. they hate when someone can see behind their facade.#if someone else can see ur pain that means it's really there or something :)#idk I have way more thoughts about this than I realized when I started typing and now the tags are gonna be longer than the post oops #might....... have to make a note to get into all this in a more in depth headcanon at some point #━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ OOC ⋮ DON’T @ ME.

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mashasxart · 10 months ago

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do u ever have A Thing you like about your own artwork that also nevertheless kind of embarrasses you or otherwise makes you look at your art as Less Than in some way

#idk i'm thinking about how sketchy and Unfinished my drawings kind of look or just Are ghfie #i like that! it's very fun to do! but sometimes it just makes me feel Some Kinda Way bc i don't really Do big ambitious drawings anymore #idk i feel like i can't emphasize Enough that i'm not feeling insecure exactly ._.#ig i just wonder sometimes if it looks unpolished or unrefined or something. if it makes me seem lazy #i only draw for fun these days but once i wanted to get into doing art as a career #would teen!me be disappointed?? idk

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transmascsnearyou · 11 months ago

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On my way to some teamleading seminar and I'm wearing a bright purple video game shirt an orange Beanie and sometimes I think it wasn't a good idea to let me make fashion choices by myself...

But I'm thinking I'm already going to be the youngest person there so might as well make the others feel out of touch.

Like watch me arriving 5 minutes late with an overpriced coffee and tell these people that I managed to get their job in less than a year when they've been working 5+ years to get to a position like this.

#this is me shaking off my insecurities #I'm really fucking nervous because everyone will probably think I'm just a kid and that I'm actually terrible at my job #which I sometimes think I am because I'm trying to accommodate everyone and apparently that's not a good idea with some of my 'coworkers'#but I've always been scared of authority figures so I'm trying to basically be a good boss so no one else feels the way I did/still do #and it's not fucking working and I've gotta get more assertive but I don't want to be an asshole which apparently I need to be #i'm rambling #all my confidence from writing the og post is gone now by writing the tags #but also it's kinda nice to let it all out

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bl00dh0rs3 · 2 years ago

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Got my end of the month burst of motivation to get my shit together and did 10 push ups

#horse.txt #and some squats and some stretches. but wow those pushups did me in #funfact last time i weighed myself i was actually Under 100 lbs! one of the most disheartening things #'you never go out you dont have any friends why dont you ever go out to meet people??' i could be stuffed in a bag and carried away on foot #i am like flat stanley. i could be blown away by a stiff breeze. and i also just dont have a large appetite?#funfact 2 one of my biggest insecurities is that when i order small portions of food or salads that ppl will think im dieting or have an ED #neither of which are necessarily a Bad thing but ppl do sometimes start to. treat you certain ways over it #either theyre the woke type who start looking at you all pitiful or they start griping to you about their own weight problems in some way #worse in the rare blue moon where ppl with ask me how i stay so skinny. bitch i have adhd i forget to eat Constantly. im starving #its on accident but shit i cant just say that to ppl lol so its always just 'haha my metabolism 🤪' which they sometimes STILL DONT ACCEPT?#LIKE AS AN ANSWER? THEY'LL JUST ASK AGAIN LIKE IM KEEPING IT A SECRET??#vent //#not really it kinda came out of nowhere honestly #sigh #very frustrated with myself lately in case yall haven't noticed!#god i need to get laid

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