#rarely do my interests converge so directly

[thepapernautilus]

when I tell you I've waited since 2019 for published ali hazelwood omegaverse this is bigger than CC3

[personality-corner]

Okay I see your point on the Fi versus Fe debate. Could the Fe you’re seeing in Moana be more of an Ne? As much as I see the part of her that is community focused I’m wondering what the distinction would be between Fe and Ne. Would the Ne aura around her be a part of the Ni? What is the distinction between Ne and Ni? Sorry if this is too many questions haha.

I will do my best to explain this, because I don’t feel like it’s a matter of Ne vs. Fe, but I did make this post describing each cognitive function in detail (I also talk a little bit more about how Moana is an Fe user, because she was an example I used for a healthy Ne user).

Essentially, the difference between Ne and Ni is Ne is divergent thinking and Ni is convergent thinking. If you don’t know what this means, I’ll summarize what I say in this post.

Ni users will narrow their focus on one singular idea, and will rarely struggle to stray away from that idea. Ne users will have a world of ideas and will struggle to settle down with one idea, instead bouncing around from interest to interest. Essentially they will lose interest quickly.

Moana has always had a consistent goal, a consistent dream. She wants nothing more than to leave the island she is on and sail on the sea. This desire is also connected with her Se. Her excitement towards her dream is almost completely ignited when she sees the sea.

Whereas, if she were an Ne user, she would have many different goals that may be connected back to past experiences and what she knows, or to some kind of routine. This would be lower Si.

Moana wants to experience new things (Se), which is directly connected to her narrowed focus on the idea of being on the ocean.

On another note, Moana 2 was announced today, so who knows, I may retype her in November, but until then… I am fairly confident in her ENFJ typing.

[idontwanttospoiltheparty]

@goodbye-home-demo

All right so basically, I've been chewing on the juxtaposition between Taylor clearly worshiping Love as a concept (and her own love/lover, specifically) and her frustrations expressed in Lavender Haze:

No deal! That 1950s shit they want from me / I just wanna stay in that lavender haze.

All they keep asking me is if I'm gonna be your bride / The only kind of girl they see is a one night or a wife.

Since Taylor otherwise really values her relationship (see: her entire post-1989 discography) and has even alluded to marriage positively in song (eg. Paper Rings, Lover) I think the issue she's expressing is less with her being viewed as a part of a relationship per se, and more with the way she's perceived within that relationship, namely she doesn't want to be seen as a passive participant in her own love story and specifically doesn't want people thinking that she's going to retire her creative work and "settle down".

But here's the thing, her creative work is very much tethered to her current relationship – and I think that's kind of the crux of it all.

Love and songwriting form a synergy within her – the fact that she has both expressed more joy than ever before, having found happiness with someone, as well as been on a creative roll in the last 6 years is not a coincidence. Contrary to her erstwhile fears that lasting happiness would lead her into a creative drought, it's actually opened up more doors than she could count.

Basically, I think that to her, one of the marks of a truly great love is it inspiring her to create.

(Also, I think it's noteworthy how Midnight Rain kind of portrays these passions as opposites and unable to coexist, and You're On Your Own, Kid describes them forming separately but eventually converging within her.)

It's interesting to me that she's used similar words to describe love in songs as she does to explain inspiration.

And there's a dazzling haze, a mysterious way about you dear. — Lover (2019)

"I've never been able to fully… explain songwriting other than… It's like this little like glittery cloud floats in front of your face and you– you grab it at the right time." (x)

"My answer is always that it happens differently every time, and that's why I'm still so in love with songwriting." (x)

She's also outright written love songs directly referring to being inspired to create.

Lyrical smile, indigo eyes, hand on my thigh, we could follow the sparks, I'll drive. — I Think He Knows (2019)

And from the same song, this line, which, based on what she said, implies the same:

He got my heartbeat skipping down sixteenth avenue. — I Think He Knows (2019)

"I mention a street called 16th Avenue, and that's a street in Nashville where I used to write songs. The songwriting/publishing houses are on that street, so if you're wondering if I just picked a random number, I didn't." (x)

Lastly, also need to point to this line:

I'm setting off / But not without my muse. — the lakes (2020)

Taylor's also outright expressed interest in what makes someone inspiring. Look at this passage from her 2018 conversation with Pattie Boyd:

TS: I don’t know what it is that makes some people really creatively inspiring. There have been people I’ve spent a lot of time with who I just couldn’t write about. PB: Yes, now what is that? TS: I don’t know. It’s just that some people come into your life and they have this effect on you. It’s really interesting because in your case you inspired that creative output from two iconic musicians. That just blows my mind. It’s very rare! (x)

Circling back to Lavender Haze and the idea of being reduced to a passive, docile woman within a romantic relationship (You see all the wisest women had to do it this way / 'Cause we were born to be the pawn in every lover's game.) I think, aside from her justified outrage at sexist standards, this concept is also something that is antithetical to how she specifically approaches love; she's an active participant in it via the art she creates about it. Creative inspiration is a pillar of the great love of her life.

Somewhat off-topic post-script: It's also interesting to consider the current speculated timeline of her relationship – which, of course, may be proven wrong some day – that appears to imply she began writing songs very early into dating her current partner, despite having been in a writing flunk for the previous year, which, in fact, coincides with her previous relationship, which was with someone who seemed to express shame about her co-writing a song with him and possibly wanted her to rein her creative and career drive in.

Your picket fence is sharp as knives. […] Storm coming, good husband, bad omen / Dragged my feet right down the aisle / At the house, lonely, good money, I'd pay if you'd just know me / Seemed like the right thing at the time. / You know there's many different ways you can kill the one you love / The slowest way is never loving them enough. — High Infidelity (2022)

I have so many thoughts about the way Taylor's view of love is inextricably linked to how she views writing but alas, I have like ten swiftie followers.

[strangertheory]

It's weird because we get an insight into how El feels about EVERY other member of the Party. Annoyed at Lucas for being Mike's wingman, dating Mike, BFFs with Max, lights up with a smile when she sees Dustin. (He's definitely her favorite friend other than Max. Adorably.) But with Will, it's still unclear. He might as well be Steve Harrington. What El feels or thinks about him is just as much of a mystery. I really want the show to start filling in those gaps next season.

We know from the rare instances that El has interacted with Will that she cares about his safety and seems to be genuinely concerned whenever Will is in danger. In season 1 she braves the Upside Down to find him at Castle Byers and begins screaming his name, terrified, when he begins to fade away. In season 2 she immediately asks to see Will when she arrives to save the day and when she is guided into the room where Will is lying unconscious on the bed she looks at him very tenderly and I believe in a way that shows that she cares a lot about his safety. We have never been given a moment that would suggest that El feels anything but kindness and concern towards Will, and in spite of various fan community rivalries (and ideas tossed around in bad faith with what I can only see as being motivated by petty "shipping wars") I truly do not see any moments in the series that would suggest that Will has ever felt any genuine animosity towards El herself. All instances in which Will has expressed an opinion about El (that wasn't tied to Mike being an ass to his friends because of Mike's obsession with El) have been neutral and even positive. In the book Will Byers: Secret Files, Will seems to be in awe of El, shy, and unsure of how to talk to someone who he knows saved his life. ("I didn’t know what to say to her in person. What do you say to someone who saved your life and literally pulled you out of hell? All I could think to say was “hello” and “nice meeting you… again.”")

Ultimately I think that although there could be some tension and conflict between Will and El in season 4 that they will be very close by the end of season 5. I think it will be very important for Will and El to learn to trust and respect one another by the end of the series even if they are at odds with each other at any point in season 4. I look forward to seeing El and Will interact more and become closer as the story continues and I believe that El now living with the Byers family at the end of season 3 represents their ever-increasing proximity to each other's storylines. Whatever may or may not be happening in the series, I am dying to see Will and El's plot-threads and their connections to one another finally addressed and explored.

Will and El's relationship and dynamic with each other is my absolute favorite topic to discuss, but it's rare that anyone else in the fan community focuses on them. Even when I do on occasion notice fans discussing Will and El, many fans seem to believe that since they rarely interact with each other that this means there is no purpose in discussing their relationship.

Ironically, I find that oftentimes when there is a noteworthy absence of something in a story (in this case interaction between El and Will) that this is all the more reason to discuss it and ask "why?" rather than dismiss it as irrelevant. Sometimes what is hidden and what is left unaddressed and unexplored might be more critical to the secrets of a story than what is clearly defined and explored outright.

I am not sure if you have read many of my other posts regarding my theories about what is happening in Stranger Things, but to provide you with some brief context: my interpretation of what might be happening in Stranger Things is somewhat unique compared to the majority of the current fanbase. I theorize that Stranger Things is about a dissociated system and that Will is a host and that El is an alter (specifically a gatekeeper) and that El and Will only interact within the system and within internal worlds of their shared mind.

El and Will's relationship with each other is my favorite topic to discuss, and I would like to share with you some of my former blogposts which you can read if you are interested in both my thoughts on their current interactions, and lack thereof.

Here is a link to my older write-up regarding El and Will's mysterious connection to each other and the rarity of their direct interactions.

I suspect that Will's "Caught between two slides" conversation with Mike is not merely about the relationship between El and Mike or between Will and Mike but more interesting perhaps very, very delicately hinting at the connection between Will and El once again. You can read my thoughts about this here in this blogpost.

I found an excerpt from Will Byers: Secret Files which I believe supports my hypothesis that Stranger Things about a dissociated system and that El can only interact directly with Will within their shared mind and within internal worlds. You can read more on my thoughts on this and view the excerpt here.

El and Will are such wonderful characters and I look forward to seeing their storylines continue and, hopefully, converge in a really beautiful way in seasons 4 and 5. Although I do anticipate that they could potentially have some conflict in their relationship initially due to misunderstandings and perhaps anxieties over sharing so much with one another (both literally while living under the same roof at the Byers', but perhaps also in other more complex ways), I would be more than eager to see them simply become very close and establish a deep trust in each other sooner rather than later.

El and Will learning to trust, understand, and care about each other by the end of the series would make me so, so happy.

* @kaypeace21 has written extensively about the theory that Stranger Things is about a system as well. My thoughts and ideas regarding how this is represented in the show are sometimes notably different than hers, but if this general theory and interpretation of the story and its characters interests you I recommend considering reading both my posts on this subject and also visiting @kaypeace21's blog to see her thoughts on the subject for a different angle.

[thegrapeandthefig]

Aphrodite of the Sea

This aspect of hers deserves some more attention. As someone who was raised by the sea, grand-daughter of a sailor and one who fell for an ex-sailor, I'm terribly biased. Aphrodite's association with the sea is not ignored, and I see it come up often through aesthetics, but I've more rarely seen the cultic aspect being brought up. So here we are.

The birth of Aphrodite and the epithets Her birth is obviously a given when talking about Aphrodite's link to the sea. Hesiod, in his Theogony, informs us that she was born out of the white seafoam generated by Ouranos' mutilated testicles which were thrown in the sea and carried by the waves. From this birth, Aphrodite was given the epithet Anadyomene "Rising from the Sea". While this myth alone could be enough to explain the goddess' natural intimacy with the marine world, the other epithets she has give a glimpse of a deeper association. First, we can list the basics: Pontia "of the Deep Sea", Pelagia "of the Open Sea", Thalassai "of the Sea", Galenai "of the Calm Sea". More interesting are Euploia "of Smooth Sailing" and Limenia/Epilimenia "of the Harbor", because they explicitely refer to her impact on mortal's lives, and especially the lives of those for whom sailing is essential.

The goddess of seafarers More than the sea itself, Aphrodite's home is the harbor and the sea coast. In fact, her sanctuaries and temples were commonly built on the sea side, on the harbor or the beach (especially on island towns): in many cases, Aphrodite's cult was brought from the sea to foreign lands. Greek mariners took her with them where they sailed and as such, have brought her cult a bit everywhere around the Mediterranean, whether through trade or war. 

As the patronness of ship's crews, mariners, ship owners, traders, fishermen, immigrants and seafaring tourists, it is natural to find her on the harbor when back on land, and especially under the epithet of Euploia. This was the case in Athens, of course, but also in Knidos, Olbia, Cilicia, Mylasa and Delos. In Corinth, Kechries and Aegina, it is the epithet Epilimenia that is prefered. Finally, other seaside temples and sanctuaries simply refered to her as Pontia. I simply wish to highlight, with this long list, that we are not dealing with an obscure aspect of Aphrodite. Her cult amongst seafarers is an important and widespread one. Her most important sanctuaries were in Cythera and Cyprus, as both location tie into the birth story as told by Hesiod. Cythera being where she first touched land, and Cyprus being her main cult site and permanent "residence". Cyprus is, in fact, covered by hundreds of sanctuaries dedicated to her. I could go on and on about the mythical associations between certain spots in Cyprus or even Rhodes, but this is not the focus for today.

Aphrodite protected sailors in many ways. Being both of the sea and the sky, she righteously has dominion over the winds necessary for sailing. Epigrams found in the Palatine Anthology give us some insight about what the sailors prayed her for:

"Cypris, if you save those at sea, save me, beloved goddess, who perish ship-wrecked on land." - Book 5, epigram 11

"Guardian of the surf-beaten shore, I send you, Cypris, these little cakes and simple gifts of sacrifice. For tomorrow I shall cross the broad Ionian Sea, hasting to the bosom of my Idothea. Shine favourable on my love, and on my bark, you who are queen alike of the bedroom and of the shore." - Book 5, epigram 17

"This is the place of Cypris, for it is sweet to her to look ever from the land on the bright deep, that she may makes voyages of sailors happy; and around the sea trembles, looking on her polished image." - Book 9, epigram 144 "This passing fair statue did Aeximenes erect to Aphrodite, the protectress of all navigation. Hail, sovereign Cypris! And if you give gain and welcome wealth you shall learn that a ship is most ready to go shares." - Book 9, epigram 601

translations by W. R. Paton, modernized by me. 

Those epigrams give us interesting examples of offerings given to Aphrodite as well: cakes, statues, and a promise of giving back some of the wealth gained from trade. These are far from being the only sources we have on the matter. For example, Plutarch tells in Life of Theseus (18.2) how Theseus sacrificed to Aphrodite a female goat before setting sail to Crete. While it is unlikely that Plutarch had sources to back up this claim, he is using a logical association rooted in cult practices.

It is important to point out that the liveliness of the harbors also made it a prime location for sex workers, another part of the population under Aphrodite's protection. Herodotus, for example, tells us about the greek colony in Egypt, Naukratis, and how the sex workers there were successful in their business (Histories, 2. 135.5). The Piraeus port in Athens has also been described as a sex work hot spot (cf. Aeschines, Against Timarchos, 40), and it would be quite logical to consider this a widespread phenomenon, especially when the association between sex work and mariners has lasted through time. Between sex workers and sailors, harbors really do unite two worlds of Aphrodite: love and the sea. 

The case of Naukratis is otherwise notable, as excavations have shown that the temple in the sanctuary of Aphrodite was one of the oldest structures of the city, dating back to 600 BC and founded by East Greek traders. Several vases were dedicated here to Aphrodite Pandemos, which makes sense, as the colony was composed of immigrant citizens from varied backgrounds. 

Aphrodite’s fish

Athenaeus of Naukratis tells of how the gilt-head bream is particularly sacred to Aphrodite in Cythera, as this fish has scales that have a golden shimmer to it. The local fishmermen considered it a good omen to see a bream appear to them, and a confirmation of the goddess' protection on sea. Athenaeus also mentions the pilot-fish, probably naucrates ductor, which tends to follow sharks, but is also known to follow boats. Still according to Athenaeus, the pilot-fish was born directly from Ouranos' blood at the same time as the birth of Aphrodite. In a similar fashion than with the bream, seeing a pilot-fish swim besides the ship was considered a good omen of divine protection. More generally, the dolphin is also sacred to her, an animal she shares with Apollo and Dionysus, among others. For Plutarch, all sea life is sacred to her and should not be killed.

_____________

Further reading: (note that this post is long and could have been way longer. I’ve made major cuts to make this digestable)

Blakely S., Collins J. B., Religious Convergence in the Ancient Mediterranean, 2019

Cyrino S. M., Aphrodite, 2010

Demetriou D., Tῆς πάσης ναυτιλίης φύλαξ: Aphrodite and the Sea in: Kernos 23, 2013

Pirenne-Delforge V., L’Aphrodite grecque. Contribution a l’etude de ses cultes et de sa personnalite dans le pantheon archaique et classique, 1994 

[tiramisiyu]

【未定事件簿】 Tears of Themis: 【千灯如昼】 Xia Yan’s A Thousand Lanterns like Daytime Date/Phonecall Translation

--

Translation Masterlist | Xia Yan Masterlist

Video: https://www.bilibili.com/video/BV13k4y127hd

My new laptop just came in today, so I was finally able to finish the last bit of the translation for this that I was missing out on!

This particular date story is very cute but also really hits you with the angst every so often. It’s hard being a Xia Yan fan, with pain lurking at every corner lmaoo

PART 1

Star Bridge Light Event 

A gentle cool wind blew away the scorching summer heat, accompanying the moon-tinted sunset. The curtain formally rose on the Star Bridge Light event tonight. 

MC: It’s so lively. 

The street vendors on the two sides of the road gave their all in announcing their wares. Tourists were squeezed in everywhere, in high spirits. The crisp sounds of rattle drums and windchimes assimilated with the racket of the crowd, so much that I couldn’t resist feeling the joy myself. 

Ever since the incident from when we were young, I’ve never attended a light festival event again. If not for Xia Yan’s invitation this time, I probably wouldn’t have had this chance as well…

--

[Flashback]

Home

Last Sunday night, I received Xia Yan’s call not long after I had finished eating dinner.

Xia Yan: MC, quick, look outside the window.

He had just spoken when I saw gorgeous colours exploding far away in the night sky through the French windows. 

MC: Such beautiful fireworks – what’s being celebrated?

Xia Yan: Did you forget? Today’s the once-a-year summer festival – the opening ceremony for the Star Bridge Light event.

MC: Is that so… looking at the direction of the fireworks, the event this year should be at the quaint block on Stellis River’s shore.

MC: It must be very lively there, right now.

Xia Yan: Yeah, I heard that the hosts started preparing for this event one month in advance. 

Xia Yan: Now that I mention it, for related light festivals… have you gone with anyone in the years that I wasn’t here?

MC: I didn’t.

Xia Yan: Really?

MC: Really, I’ve never gone ever since a certain someone nearly got lost at the light festival.

Xia Yan: Ahem – didn’t think that you would still remember…

MC: That’s for sure. After all, we even alerted the police back then.

Xia Yan: Ah, I’m begging you to be magnanimous and forgive me for being young and clueless back then.

Xia Yan: To wash away this dark history, how about… we go again? To make up for it, I’ll cover all the costs for eating, drinking, and playing games.

Xia Yan: And I can take the chance to let Peanut get some fresh air. He hasn’t seen you in a while.

MC: That should be fine…

Xia Yan: Then it’s confirmed!

[Flashback end]

--

At the end, we agreed to meet on the day of the closing ceremonies. According to Xia Yan, there would be an even more magnificent show then than at the opening ceremonies. Maybe it was because they wanted to catch this final chance, but the Star Bridge Light event was still filled with an endless stream of guests.

Xia Yan: Come closer to me – don’t get squished.

Saying this, Xia Yan blocked my front side, isolating a safe zone for me.

MC: Ah, Xia Yan, you don’t have to help me by blocking them off. With so many people, be careful that you don’t fall.

Xia Yan: Don’t worry, how could I fall? I’m a front-liner, after all. Trust in my skill a little more.

I hadn’t had the time to respond when I suddenly heard him give a muffled grunt, frowning.

Xia Yan: Ngh…

MC: What’s wrong? Were you stepped on?

Xia Yan: Nothing’s up – I was just accidentally poked by the toy in that kid’s hand.

MC: Poked? It must hurt a lot… let me see if there’s a wound.

Xia Yan dexterously dodged my hand, then rubbed his waist, deliberately putting on an embarrassed look.

Xia Yan: It doesn’t hurt – I was just startled. Do you really want to look in a public place with so many people?

MC: Yeah, I shouldn’t look.

Xia Yan: Don’t worry – I’m thick-skinned.

Xia Yan: Since they set up a lot of parent-child events for this light event, lots of parents are bringing their children over.

Xia Yan: Unlike me, you have to be somewhat careful. Though the children aren’t doing it on purpose, it’s hard to prevent them from being reckless or uncareful.

MC: Sure, I’ll be careful.

MC: Although looking at them right now, I keep feeling like I’m looking at us from the past…

MC: Right, Xia Yan, do you still remember what happened when we were little?

The suddenly-addressed Xia Yan startled, like a child who’d done something wrong, and met my gaze with particular sincerity. 

Xia Yan: That time when we were little was a special situation. I’m not someone with a bad sense of direction – I definitely won’t get lost again. 

He really was ahead of the game with his crisis awareness, but…

MC: I’m not talking about that.

Xia Yan: Huh? Then what is it?

MC: Ever since last week when we brought up that matter about getting lost, I suddenly remembered something that has never been clarified. 

Xia Yan: Eh? What thing?

MC: I faintly remember that the reason that you walked off from us back then because you were looking for something.

MC: But at the end, you only said that you couldn’t find it. From start to finish, you never told us exactly what you were looking for…

Xia Yan froze, then immediately made an “ah” sound, as if he’d come to a sudden realization. 

Xia Yan: Ah, something like that did happen.

Xia Yan: Though it’s been so long, so I actually don’t really remember.

MC: Is that so…

Though this was pardonable, I couldn’t resist sighing. I’d pestered Xia Yan a lot back then to make the truth clear. I never thought that, with the passing of time, this would be a completely unsolvable mystery. Seeing my disappointed expression Xia Yan immediately began to comfort me, half-soothing and half-persuasion.

Xia Yan: Don’t sigh. Maybe I’ll think of it after walking around soon.

After saying so, he showed an impatient expression, as if he was waiting for me to cheer up. Seeing Xia Yan like this, the disappointment in my heart was swept away in an instant.

MC: Makes sense – since we’re at the light event, then the probability of remembering it all again is very high.

Xia Yan: That’s right. This is a rare opportunity, so let’s go on this light event trip to find those memories. 

Xia Yan: Follow the great detective, and let’s head out, my Watson!

Circling in the air, the myna bird Peanut responded in squawks for a few times, thinking that it had heard its own name*. It flew far outwards, following the lights of the converged lanterns. Laughing, Xia Yan whistled to it in response, then walked into the boisterous crowd, leading me by my hand. 

I didn’t know if the answer from back then would be hidden at the end of this long road, brightly-lit by lanterns. 

TL Note:

* “Peanut” and “Watson” sound nearly identical in Chinese.

PART 2

We followed the river of people forward, doing our best to not pass by a single shop.

Exactly what was Xia Yan looking for when he was little… was it a special snack, or an interesting toy? I tried to find an answer in this year’s light festival, but I couldn’t help feeling that I was being ridiculous.

MC: (In a blink, so many years have passed…)

MC: Xia Yan, have you seen anything you’re particularly interested in?

Xia Yan: About that… I feel like it’s all pretty interesting.

Just then… I heard a stream of loud and clear geese honks.

MC: Geese? Did I imagine that?

Xia Yan: No, I heard it too. It seems like it came from there.

Xia Yan pointed to the nearby stall. After passing through the gaps in the crowd, I could see that there were many big white geese in a fenced area. They extended their long necks, cleverly ducking away from the crowd of people who tossed out rings. Sometimes, they’d even strut around, fanning out their two wings. 

MC: So this is a ring toss game? I didn’t think that the light event would keep up with the times. They’ve come up with new tricks…

Xia Yan: It seems pretty interesting.

MC: … If you looked clearly at those rows of jagged teeth in their mouths, you wouldn’t say that.

Xia Yan: Haha, if I remember correctly, didn’t you get chased and bitten by a big goose until you fell in a mud pit when we went to the countryside to visit relatives?

Xia Yan: I think it was me who noticed it first, so I pulled you out.

MC: Stop talking, stop talking – those memories are going to surge out!

Xia Yan: Calm down – it’s about time for us to take our revenge.

Xia Yan: Plus, it looks like the prizes are pretty good!

I hadn’t even had time to look at what the prizes were when Xia Yan directly waved and shouted at the boss.

Xia Yan: Boss, ten rings here.

Ring Toss Stand Boss: Sure!

MC: Xia Yan, you couldn’t be wanting to…

--

Standing in the established area, as set by the rules, Xia Yan held the rings. After comparing the distance a few times, he directly flung one out. The ring flew straight to its target, and right when it was about to land, the big white goose suddenly extended its long neck, squawking a few “caw caw” sounds at Xia Yan in demonstration.

Xia Yan: Oops.

Because of the height difference, the ring that should’ve been able to land right on the head of the big white goose, hit its neck directly. Following a severe “caw” sound, the big white goose fluttered backwards, staggering several steps before it firmly stabilized itself.

Xia Yan: Hey, are you… okay?

Accompanying Xia Yan’s gradually freezing expression, I noticed that big white goose’s attitude seemed a bit off. 

In its two beady eyes… there seemed to be killing intent.

MC: Xia, Xia Yan! I think it’s angry!

Xia Yan: Eh?!

The big white goose stuck out its neck, then rushed towards us. When it reached the fence, it jumped up with a flap of its wings, then descended in a mission-accomplished way. With a cry, the crowd of people dissipated all at once. The big white goose didn’t chase them – it just pinned a death stare on Xia Yan in front of him.

Xia Yan: MC, stay away from me.

Just when he said this, the big white goose twisted its neck as if warming up, and with a “caw caw”, it rushed at Xia Yan.

Xia Yan: Br-brother goose! Let’s discuss this nicely!

The beady eyes of the goose had been completely clouded by anger. It ruthlessly found every opportunity to peck Xia Yan with an iron beak. The boss probably had never seen a goose so intent on revenge, and was shocked silly during then.

Xia Yan: Stop your mouth! Don’t! Don’t bite there!

MC: Xia Yan, hurry and run! Don’t get caught! Or else…

Xia Yan: Don’t talk about it! If an accident happens to me, I’m handing my antiques shop for you to take over!

Xia Yan: In there, I’ve left for you… wait, don’t peck my behind!

MC: Here, there’s a basket! Hurry and trap it!

Maybe it was because the goose had gotten tired of pecking Xia Yan, or maybe it was because my words attracted its anger, but it changed its target and rushed towards me.

MC: Ahhhhhh don’t come over here –

Seeing the direction that the goose had changed to, the aura surrounding Xia Yan immediately changed. He stared at that goose “murderously”, as if the person who cut a sorry figure fleeing just now wasn’t him.

Xia Yan: You better slow down!

I hadn’t even had the chance to escape when Xia Yan seized the goose’s neck from behind, then turned around, sending it straight back into the fence with a fling of his hand. Right then, not just the crowd of people, but even the originally restless goose crowd became still.

MC: !!!

It took me a while to regain my bearings from the shock.

MC: Xia Yan, did you get any pecking injuries on your body? Does it hurt?

Xia Yan: Nothing’s wrong. Though that big white goose looks scary, compared to people, its ability to hurt is limited.

MC: That’s good. I’d originally thought you wouldn’t be able to handle it.

MC: Didn’t think it would end up being the opposite. Your posture when throwing the goose was just like that “Discobolus” sculpture.

Xia Yan: Hahaha, it wasn’t that exaggerated, right…

Xia Yan: I’d originally wanted to let it peck me so it could let go of its anger, but I didn’t think that it would actually rush at you. Good thing that in the end, it just looked scary without actually being dangerous.

Xia Yan: Otherwise, this goose might have been sent to the dinner table.

Hearing Xia Yan’s last sentence, I couldn’t help but flinch for that goose.

--

In the end, though we didn’t get a ring on a goose, the boss gave Xia Yan the right to choose a prize for capturing the goose.

Xia Yan: I’ll have this one.

MC: A comb?

I looked at that sandalwood comb, feeling somewhat surprised at his choice.

Xia Yan: Yeah. The craftsmanship of this comb is pretty good – it’s not like those assembly-line-made wholesale ones. 

Ring Toss Stand Boss: Young people sure have good eyes for these things. I found this batch of ours from an old craftsman in the village – it was completely handmade.

Ring Toss Stand Boss: This craft has already been passed down through several generations. Legend says that the god of the land used the combs made by his family, before he was granted godhood. 

MC: The god of the land?

Ring Toss Stand Boss: That’s right. Young lady, you must not have known that the origin of the Star Bridge Light event has to do with the god of the land.

The boss started chattering, and was just about to unleash a torrent of local knowledge on me when he was cut short by Xia Yan in a timely manner.

Xia Yan: Boss, you should focus on watching over your stall, lest those geese run out again.

As he spoke, Xia Yan stuffed the prize straight into my hand.

Xia Yan: For you.

I held the comb that he had exchanged for the peril he’d faced, and suddenly felt that it had some sort of heavy weightiness.

MC: You’re giving this to me?

Xia Yan: Mm. You said before that recently, you’ve been losing sleep. Aside from chatting with you, there doesn’t seem to be much else that I can help with.

Xia Yan: I consulted a doctor, and he said that lightly combing your hair before sleeping can improve your sleep…

As Xia Yan spoke, his gaze started becoming erratic. Seeing this, the boss on the side laughed.

Ring Toss Stand Boss: Young man, you didn’t need to bother with that.

Ring Toss Stand Boss: The comb is a personal item. Rather than some health benefits, its more important use is…

Xia Yan: Boss! If you talk too much, you’ll affect your profit prospects.

Ring Toss Stand Boss: Alright, I’ll stop talking about it.

Xia Yan turned around with some awkwardness. Though he purposefully blocked his face with his hand, I could still see the slightly-flushed tips of his ears from my angle.

MC: Alright, Xia Yan, the boss was messing with us, don’t take it seriously.

MC: I’ll remember to use it every night to comb my hair. If it works, then I’ll definitely tell you right away!

Xia Yan: …Okay.

After hearing my words, the boss suddenly started laughing even louder. After glaring at him, Xia Yan immediately tugged me away from the stand.

Why did I feel like… he was somewhat in a huff?

--

Having returned into the crowd, I had a somewhat clear target this time.

MC: Xia Yan, let’s try some events that kids can safely play next time.

MC: I feel like you wouldn’t have provoked a big goose when you were little. Otherwise, if you encountered a situation like just now, I reckon you’d be gone…

Xia Yan: How am I that weak? I was the one who scared off that goose that made you fall into the mud pit back then.

MC: Let this topic go!

Although, it really was as Xia Yan said – he scared off the goose, and afterwards, I never saw it in my vicinity. I even vaguely remembered that, in the few days after, the food on the dinner table were all abnormally sumptuous – and among them, one of the permanent dishes seemed to be…

MC: Eh?! That goose ended up getting eaten?!

Xia Yan: Hm hm? What did you say?

Xia Yan: Ah! There are a lot of kids surrounding that stand – let’s go over and look.

MC: You must be deliberately forcing away the topic, right…

So it turns out that Xia Yan’s threat from just now was for real. If some geese gave chase… they’d end up on the dinner table. 

PART 3

Following the joyful cheers of children, Xia Yan and I arrived in front of a shop.

MC: They’ve even got sugar people*!

The boss was a kindly grandpa. Though the hair on his head was white, his hand movements were natural and unforced. With a few movements, he had created a vivid and lifelike phoenix. I couldn’t resist exclaiming along with the children.

MC: Whoa – so amazing!

Xia Yan: Yeah, no wonder he attracted so many little fans.

Xia Yan: Although looking at the situation right now, it seems like he’s a little too busy…

Just as Xia Yan said, the boss had no time whatsoever to consider us. After a hurried glance over, he only had the time to send a greeting in our direction.

Sugar Person Shop Boss: Come, I don’t have time to do it for you, so you two can do it yourselves.

MC: Eh? Was the boss talking to us?

Xia Yan: Eh… seems like it.

The boss’s abnormally familiar attitude as if he knew us from the start, as well as Xia Yan’s unnatural expression, made me feel somewhat strange.

MC: Xia Yan, do you know the boss from before?

Xia Yan: Ah? I’m not familiar with him. Maybe the boss is too busy and just didn’t realize.

Xia Yan: Aiya, let’s not talk about this. Either way, since the boss is letting us do it ourselves, how about we go for it.

With a grin, Xia Yan pointed to the side of the boss where there was a small candy-making stall, eagerly pulling up his sleeves.

MC: Making sugar people is the work of a craftsman – I probably won’t be great at it.

Xia Yan: No problem – I’m here.

Xia Yan: You didn’t get to eat it because of a cavity when we were little – this time, you definitely won’t miss it.

MC: You’ve forgotten your own matters so completely, yet you still remember these little things…

Xia Yan: Because they’re things about you.

After winking at me, he took off his jacket and tied it around his waist, then crouched at the candy-making stall. He held up the steel spoon, scooping out some syrup from the heating stove with familiarity, and smoothly started to draw with seriousness on the steel counter. 

Thin threads of sugar meandered off the steel spoon, following his movements to take form, finally converging to become a playful-looking little person.

MC: It’s so cute!

Hearing my praise, Xia Yan waved the cute sugar person he was holding. His smile bloomed from his eyes, bringing a joy as if he was waiting to be praised. 

Xia Yan: Here – can you guess who I made?

Looking at it carefully, the sugar person’s hairstyle and hair décor seemed to be quite similar to how I was dressed up today. 

MC: Could it be… me?

Xia Yan turned his wrist, holding the sugar person in front of his eye.

Xia Yan: Mm, it’s you.

Through the crystal-clear sugar person, his coral eyes looked like rich honey, mixed with thoughts that had been mulled over for a long time. 

Xia Yan: I was thinking of you when I made this sugar person.

Drums sounded from far away, accelerating my frenzied heartbeat.

As he was now, Xia Yan looked like he was doing his best to impress everything into his sight. He didn’t pay attention to the surrounding noise – he just looked at me with a clear gaze, letting the light shine a gentle layer of brilliance on his body. 

Little Boy: Big brother! Could you also make one for me?

Little Girl: I want one too!

The surrounding kids eagerly watched the sugar person in Xia Yan’s hands, outdoing each other in squeezing over here.

Xia Yan: Little friends, we’re not selling over here. If you want sugar people, go find the boss over there and buy from him. 

Little Boy: Aw – big brother is so stingy.

Little Girl: But I want one that you’ve made…

Xia Yan: Sorry, sorry – I’m only making them for one person today.

Xia Yan apologetically patted the kids’ heads, then walked over to my side proudly.

Xia Yan: How is it – I didn’t disappoint, right?

MC: As expected of Great Detective Xia who knows how to do everything. But with so many longing gazes surrounding us, I’m feeling somewhat embarrassed…

Xia Yan: Being the target of admiration is a good thing.

Xia Yan held the sugar person in his hand in front of me. It was like the honey-coloured gloss and the fragrance of maltose had a sort of magic that could uplift people’s moods.

> Directly taste it > Solemnly accept it

MC: Then I won’t be courteous.

I got close to the sugar person and directly took a bite.

Xia Yan: Eh?!

The clear sweetness of the sugar filled my mouth, and I was immediately filled with happiness.

MC: Hoo… so good.

Xia Yan: Th-the head is almost gone!

As if he didn’t know whether to laugh or cry, Xia Yan looked at the sugar person that was nearly missing half its head in his hand, then held out his hand to wipe the sugar stains on the side of my mouth. 

Xia Yan: … Haha, you really don’t have a single mental burden about this.

MC: Hm? Why would I be burdened?

Xia Yan: It’s nothing. As long as you like it, I’ll make you another if there’s a chance in the future.

> Directly taste it > Solemnly accept it

I carefully took the sugar person, fearing that someone would bump into it and shatter it. Or at least, that’s what I said, but I saw that Xia Yan’s expression was extremely surprised, with a trace of happiness.

MC: This was personally made by Great Detective Xia – it definitely is different from typical sugar people.

MC: Let me think… how should I hang this up when I get back?

Xia Yan: It’s been quite hot recently. How about making a freezing glass display case for it?

MC: Ah… something this troublesome…

Xia Yan: I’m kidding.

Xia Yan: If you like it, I can make it for you again whenever. You don’t need to specially collect and treasure it.

--

Holding the freshly-made sugar person in my hand, I once again fell into a daze about the next target.

MC: Looks like the thing you were looking for back then wasn’t a sugar person… then what exactly could it be…

Xia Yan: You really are persistent about this. It might not even be anything that’s that big of a deal.

MC: I still want to know.

MC: Back then, I thought you were never going to come back, and I cried while searching for a long time with mom and dad. To me, this matter is just like a knot in my heart.

Xia Yan: A knot in your heart?

MC: That’s right. I keep feeling like if I don’t find out what you were looking for back then, you’ll disappear again…

Xia Yan: …

Xia Yan: Even if I really did disappear, it wouldn’t be your fault anyways.

Xia Yan whispered this sentence almost inaudibly, and it dissipated in the surrounding boisterous holiday atmosphere. 

MC: What?

Xia Yan: Nothing. Let’s keep thinking of ways – maybe I’ll be able to remember what it was I was looking for very soon. 

Seeming to have become aware of our troubles, the sugar person shop boss on the side started talking to us warmly while making the sugar person he was working on. 

Sugar Person Shop Boss: If you're talking about looking for something, could it be that you’re looking for the god of the land?

MC: Eh? Why do you say so?

This was already the second time that I’ve heard of this “god of the land” name. If I wasn’t remembering wrong, it had to do with the legend of the Star Bridge Light event.

Sugar Person Shop Boss: Haha, because in this light event, it most likely has to do with the god of the land if you’re talking about looking for something. 

Xia Yan: Mm, it’s because of the legend in the folklore here. 

Sugar Person Shop Boss: Look at you – if you know, why not tell the young lady?

As he spoke, the boss drew up a completely new sugar person.  Looking at the figure, it was a celestial being in fluttering clothes.

Sugar Person Shop Boss: Legend says that the god of the land will wear a mask and mix with the crowds, on this day in the Star Bridge Light event, to look for the lover he was separated from before he became a god.

Sugar Person Shop Boss: As long as one recognizes him, the wish they hold at the bottom of their heart will definitely become reality.

MC: I didn’t think that the Star Bridge Light event had such a romantic legend – I didn’t know about it before.

Sugar Person Shop Boss: This isn’t your fault, young lady. As time flows on, some things are destined to fade away and be forgotten. 

Sugar Person Shop Boss: I also had suddenly remembered the light event back then – there were very many visitors wearing masks, and all the kids would excitedly guess who was the real god of the land. 

Sugar Person Shop Boss: Maybe what you were looking for back then was him.

MC: Thank you, boss. I will definitely remember this legend.

As if he saw through my thought process, before I even opened my mouth, Xia Yan rushed to be the first to suggest a direction.

Xia Yan: I just saw a stall nearby that sells masks – let’s go and take a look.

MC: Ah, okay!

At this moment, I suddenly had the strong feeling that what Xia Yan had been searching for back then wasn’t something that could be seen or felt. Instead, it was an opportunity to make his wish a reality.

TL Note:

* You may have seen these before – sugar people (“糖人”, tang ren) use melted sugar to create fragile, edible figures!

PART 4

Maybe it was because they weren’t like the cartoon masks favoured by children, as most of the masks sold at the stand were all wooden masks with traditional features, but compared to the other stands that were busy with many visitors, the front of this mask shop was clearly much more deserted.

MC: So the god of the land wore this kind of mask to hide among the crowds…

Xia Yan: That’s just a legend. There doesn’t actually exist any god of the land.

MC: So you couldn’t find him back then?

Xia Yan: …

Seeming to be surprised by my sudden question, Xia Yan froze for a moment, then finally laughed.

Xia Yan: Haha, didn’t think you would ask about this so suddenly…

Xia Yan: You’re right. I really was looking for the legendary god of the land back then.

Like he was slowly unearthing past memories, Xia Yan’s gaze wandered over the rows and rows of dazzling masks, finally coming to a stop on my face.

Xia Yan: I’m sorry for making you worry back then. Now that I think back, those kinds of thoughts were pretty childish.

MC: No worries. As family members, we should take care of each other, after all.

MC: Plus, I think that believing in legends has nothing to do with whether you’re childish. This is a way to place your hopes on something.

If so, exactly what was it that Xia Yan had placed his hopes on back then? Up till now, he’s never brought up this matter. It must be something that’s hard to say, so he kept it hidden…

MC: Although, being able to remember exactly what you were looking for is already very difficult. The exact wish should be even harder to remember, right?

Xia Yan: About this…

Xia Yan opened his mouth a few times, finally choosing to maintain a tacit mutual understanding with me.

Xia Yan: How about we buy the masks first? Let’s leave the wish matter to think about later.

MC: Okay, prepare to pay up – with such a rare opportunity, I’m going to choose the most expensive to keep.

Xia Yan: Sure – I’ll take it as helping with the boss’s business.

The boss, who was originally swiping on his phone on the side, straightforwardly raised his hands.

Mask Shop Boss: Why so courteous? I just came here to join in on the liveliness. If there’s anything you like, just take it.

MC: … Eh?

MC: (It seems like I’ve just heard this kind of familiar tone.)

Xia Yan: Ahem, boss, you can’t do business like this. If you gave one to everyone, wouldn’t this become a charity?

Right then, I suddenly felt someone squeezing past my back. Though it was just a few seconds, and I hadn’t planned to pay it any attention, but Xia Yan ceased his movements in making payments, frowning at the crowd while asking me.

Xia Yan: MC, hurry and see if you’ve lost something.

MC: Ah? Okay.

I reached into my pocket, and sure enough, I noticed that I’d lost something.

MC: My phone’s gone! Was it that thief just now?

Xia Yan: Don’t worry, he can’t get away. Wait for me for a bit.

After he finished speaking, Xia Yan whistled towards the sky. In response, Peanut arrived, following Xia Yan as they gave chase towards the crowd together. 

--

In a flash, over ten minutes had already passed, and Xia Yan still hadn’t returned. Because I didn’t have my phone, I had no way of contacting him. I could only incessantly look around everywhere, hoping that I’d see his figure in the crowd. 

MC: (It couldn’t be that something happened to him, right…)

My mind quickly came up with many similar cases, getting all the more anxious. As if affected by my mood, the visitors coming and going revealed more heavy expressions than before, accompanied by worried whispers. 

Visitor A: Husband, the person you were talking about is alright, right…

Visitor B: I’m not sure. I saw blood all over his face, and he was lying there, unable to move. The wounds he got probably weren’t light.

Visitor A: Ah, I hope that his life isn’t at risk.

Visitor B: Yeah, although people nowadays are too quick to act. It was just a little matter, so why bother making a mess of it to this point…

MC: (They couldn’t be talking about Xia Yan, right?!)

When I thought this, I rushed straight out and blocked that couple.

MC: My apologies – the person who was hurt that you just brought up, may I ask for an approximation of what he looked like?

Visitor A: Looked like… because there was blood all over his face, I could only just barely see that it was a fairly young boy.

Visitor B: That’s right, and he was wearing a white shirt, and he didn’t seem to have a companion with him.

MC: Could you tell me approximately where it was?

Visitor B: Right turn at the front. You’ll be able to see it after walking straight for a bit more.

MC: Thank you!

After hurriedly giving my thanks, I forced myself into the mass of people, rushing towards the direction they had indicated. 

The heat in the crowd, as well as the dazzling lanterns all around, made me feel abnormally restless in this moment. As I staggered, rushing towards the scene, I suddenly felt a familiar feeling. It seemed like I had been like this when I was little, anxiously looking in all directions for Xia Yan who’d gotten lost…

In the end, the place where we found him was a forest in the corner of the light event.

Xia Yan curled up, burying his head past his shoulders, crouching without a single sound in the corner beside the shrubbery. Sounds of lively mirth came from the light festival not too far away, but all of these seemed to have been isolated outside of this still area, like it had nothing to do with him.

After, only when I walked closer did I hear the quiet sounds of his sobbing.  

Back then, I was still young, so I’d always thought that he was terribly scared because he had gotten lost from everyone. But now that I think about it carefully, that didn’t seem to be the case… 

Xia Yan has always been very courageous since he was small. He’d even drive away a goose that was taller than him to protect me. If so, how could he have cried to that point just because he had gotten lost? He’s so smart, so he definitely also knew to ask the light event staff for help. 

MC: (Could it be that he purposefully hid away back then…)

MC: (Or does it mean…)

MC: (No good, this isn’t the time to think about these. I need to find Xia Yan fast and confirm that he’s safe!)

PART 5

When I found the scene of the accident, everything was already reaching an end. The light event staff had placed warning signs in front of the stall where the conflict had occurred, and were now methodically cleaning up the scene. 

Staff Member: Could all visitors please be aware of the shards of glass on the ground. Please aim to take alternate routes where possible.

I paid little attention to the shards scattered all around with traces of blood on them, directly stepping over the warning signs. 

Staff Member: Ah, dear visitor, please move back to avoid injury.

MC: My apologies - may I ask if you know about the condition of the one who was injured just now?

Staff Member: I came fairly late, and I’m not too clear on the detailed situation.

Staff Member: I just know that the one who was injured is a young man. Because he thought that the other person, a middle-aged man, had stolen something of his, the two got in a dispute. 

Staff Member: During this, he accidentally collided with the adjacent goldfish stall, and his eyes were scratched by the glass. It seems like he lost a lot of blood…

MC: (Stole something… could the one who was injured really be Xia Yan…)

MC: Then has he been sent to the hospital?

Staff Member: Ah, he was just lifted out by the stretcher. Is he your friend? If so, you should be able to make it if you rush over now. 

MC: Understood!

After finishing speaking, I immediately ran toward the entrance of the light event.

MC: (I hope nothing happened to Xia Yan… he must not have had anything happen to him…)

Just as I passed through the crowd of people, moving against the current, the loud, clear sound of a birdcall suddenly rang through the air. I lifted my head and saw a black figure anxiously circling around my head. 

MC: (Why is Peanut over here? Is it hastening me to hurry to find Xia Yan?)

Thus, I was unable to focus on protecting the sugar person I was holding, as I threaded through the flow of people in front of me with increased anxiety.

Right then, I suddenly heard a familiar sound behind me. 

???: Found you.

Hearing this voice, I immediately turned around - 

Where…

Is that you, Xia Yan…

Where are you…

The multicoloured lanterns threw my vision into chaos. I felt like I was in a blurred illusion, unable to distinguish between anything…

Until… a warmth wrapped lightly around my wrist. 

???: …

The sound of a light laugh directed my vision. I saw a young man…

He lifted the complicatedly-carved mask, revealing a handsome and gentle expression. That moment, reality and fantasy split apart. Between heaven and earth, only you and I are real.

MC: …

It really is you… that really is great…

I looked at him, and all the fear and unease in my heart was completely vanquished and dispersed, right then and there.

Xia Yan: What’s wrong? Staring at me in a daze - were you startled by the mask?

His eyes shone bright, looking like they could dispel all hurt in the shadow behind that brightness. 

There was a moment when I felt like I had gotten something wrong… was it him? The god spoken of in legends was him, right? Peeling back a thousand years’ worth of mist, he stepped in the waning lantern light and gradually walked over, solely to find the image of the woman that was branded in his heart.

MC: I was just thinking that… if there really was that god of the land in the light event, he might look like you.

Xia Yan: But the god of the land searched for several hundred years, and still hasn’t found and reunited with the person he loves, even until today. I can’t be like him. 

Though it was dialogue that could not get any more mundane, when placed in this moment, it was like a hidden promise, concealing a hard-to-express sentiment. When associating this with his “Found you” just now, my cheeks started to gradually heat up. 

But Xia Yan continued to gaze at me, never once shifting his vision away. The hot air grew steadily warmer. Only until I lowered my head in embarrassment did he laugh and change the topic.

Xia Yan: Although, if I hypothetically really was him, do you have any wishes you’d like to make a reality?

Xia Yan: Do you want to recover a certain thing that was forgotten?

He raised the phone in his hand and winked at me, brimming with anticipation.

MC: I don’t…

Xia Yan: Eh?! Why?

MC: It’s alright as long as you’re fine. Just now, I’d thought the one who was hurt was you…

Xia Yan: It’s no big deal - just catching a thief. I definitely won’t let myself get caught in danger. 

Xia Yan: You’re still waiting for me, after all.

MC: Xia Yan, your body is yours. Even if I wasn’t waiting for you, you have to be careful.

After listening to me, Xia Yan froze slightly, then immediately revealed a smile that was even more dazzling than before. 

Xia Yan: Mm, you’re right. Here - your phone.

There was still some of his residual warmth left on the phone, and it was slightly hot. It was only then did I suddenly realize that it wasn’t that he wasn’t anxious - he was just pretending to be calm, and hadn’t shown his panicked expression.

MC: Sorry, Xia Yan, I was too reckless just now… I didn’t carefully think before running around, making you search for that long…

Xia Yan: Don’t apologize, this isn’t your fault.

He’d just dealt with an issue just now with skill and ease, but seeing me apologize, Xia Yan was immediately in a fluster.

Xia Yan: It’s actually all my fault. After getting delayed by that accident, I didn’t get Peanut to contact you immediately.

Xia Yan: You didn’t have your phone at the time, and you must have been very anxious. I’m sorry, I didn’t give enough consideration to this…

MC: It’s no problem. Something that delays you must be something that’s very important.

MC: Wait, the accident you mentioned - could it be… the accident where someone collided into the goldfish stall and got their eyes scratched?

Xia Yan: You saw it too?

MC: To be honest… I thought that person was you…

Xia Yan: Then haven’t you underestimated my strength a little too much?

Xia Yan: Although, I was on scene at the time. I somewhat helped the person who got hurt to apply some emergency blood-staunching measures. Otherwise, his eyes would be in danger. 

MC: So amazing - I didn’t think that you also had professional first aid knowledge!

Xia Yan: I’m just alright - preventative measures and all.

Seeming somewhat embarrassed, Xia Yan scratched his head, then directly changed the topic. 

Xia Yan: All in all, if something happens like this next time, I definitely won’t let you worry about me like today.

MC: Wrong! Even if it makes me worry, you should do what you want to do first.

MC: Saving people is the most important, right?

Xia Yan: Mm. As expected, this is something that you’d say.

Xia Yan’s always like this. He’s used to putting himself last, placing priority on considering my feelings first. Ever since we were young, up till now, he’s always been careful like this. Looking at his smiling expression right now, I suddenly had a strong hunch that the reason why he had hid away back then might also have to do with me…

MC: Actually, the process of finding you this time wasn’t a bad thing to me. 

MC: It let me remember things that happened at the light event when we were little…

Xia Yan: Does… it have to do with me? 

MC: Mm, I suddenly remembered that I found you in the corner of the woods, after that time when you got lost.

MC: Back then, you didn’t ask other people for help. Was it because I did something that made you unhappy, so you deliberately hid away…

Xia Yan: No, it had nothing to do with you! Wait, that’s wrong… I can’t really say that it had nothing to do with you…

MC: Look - sure enough, it has to do with me!

MC: I’m sorry, Xia Yan… it’s all my fault…

Xia Yan: Wait wait! Don’t rush to apologize yet! That thing really wasn’t your fault!

MC: Then exactly why was it that…

Seeing me cover my face, maybe Xia Yan thought I was crying. He hurried to take out a paper napkin and edged over to look over my expression as if trying to curry favour. Only after seeing that I was just bluffing did he release a breath, as if he didn’t know whether to cry or laugh.

Xia Yan: Alright alright, I’ll talk. I really can’t deal with you.

Xia Yan: Actually… back then, I really did think about not going back, but it wasn’t your fault.

Xia Yan: I had heard and believed some of the rumours and slanders from relatives back then, and I felt that I had snatched away the attention and affection that uncle and auntie gave to you.

Xia Yan: So I wanted to return these to you… looking at it now, it really is very childish, right?

MC: It’s beyond childish! It’s simply stupid!

Xia Yan: I know, so that’s why I was too embarrassed to tell you the whole time…

After my shock gradually faded, I suddenly felt a sort of hard-to-explain anguish in my heart. I never thought that Xia Yan would have had these kinds of thoughts. It was ironic that I, who had been with him morning and night, never noticed the slightest bit of this…

MC: So… the wish you wanted to make by finding the god of the land also has to do with these thoughts?

Xia Yan: Mm, I hoped that he could make me completely disappear - from this world, and from everyone’s memories.

Xia Yan: Although, good thing I didn’t find him. Otherwise, I definitely would’ve regretted it a lot.

MC: It’s all my fault… if I had noticed this earlier, you wouldn’t have had it so hard.

Xia Yan: Alright alright, I’ve said this already - this isn’t your fault. 

Smiling, Xia Yan patted my head. Looking at his face right now, I couldn’t see the slightest bit of his past haze.

Xia Yan: It’s the opposite - I should thank you.

MC: Thank me?

Xia Yan: Mm. Though I didn’t find the god of the land, you found me.

Xia Yan: Starting from then, I made a decision.

Xia Yan: I will return several times over the attention and affection that was split for me to you, using my methods.

MC: Xia Yan…

Right then, innumerable fireworks suddenly burst in the sky, enveloping everything in gorgeous colours.

Xia Yan: Alright, it’s almost time. 

PART 6

Following the nonstop fireworks sounds, Xia Yan brought me over to the river shore beside the light event.

MC: Whoa—

I couldn’t help exclaiming in admiration. On the water surface that reflected the fireworks, innumerable river lanterns floated and drifted.  Right at that moment, they looked like specks of stars shining in the Milky Way, far away in the sky.

Xia Yan: How is it? We didn’t come here this time for nothing, right?

MC: Mm! It’s way too gorgeous. Were these river lanterns prepared specifically for the closing ceremony?

Xia Yan: That’s right, I set them up specifically for today.

MC: Eh?! You did this?

Xia Yan: Why so surprised? My hands-on ability is more than enough for these kinds of things.

MC: But there are so many of them. You must have spent a lot of time…

Xia Yan: It was alright. Placing river lanterns is one of the customs of the Star Bridge Light event, after all. It also indirectly promotes traditional culture.

Following the slight breeze, some of the river lanterns slowly drifted back to shore, stopping by my foot. If I looked carefully, it seemed like a row of words was written on each lamp. I crouched down and randomly took one of the lamps, and noticed that “Hope her work goes smoothly and that she wins every case” was written on it. Another lantern had “Hope that she will be healthy, and that she won’t be infected by all illnesses” written on it. There were even more lanterns like these, but the blessings written on each lantern were all different.

MC: Xia Yan, were the blessings on them also written by you?

Xia Yan: Mm, they were all written for you.

Xia Yan: I brought you here because I wanted to have you believe that the wish from when we were little no longer counts. These are my real wishes now.

MC: But…

I looked at the numerous lanterns and couldn’t help wrinkling my brows.

MC: Why are all these blessings for me? Are there none for you?

Xia Yan: Because I…

He forcibly swallowed back the words he had opened his mouth to say. With the change in topic, his tone deemphasized the matter at hand.

Xia Yan: There’s actually no reason. Back at the beginning, when I was preparing the river lights, I racked my brains for a long while because I didn’t know what to write.

Xia Yan: After, I thought about you, and I ended up writing on all of them without realizing it. I even felt like I hadn’t made enough river lanterns.

Xia Yan: It’s a pity that there weren’t enough materials already, so I could only make do with those.

But, even if there were enough materials, he probably never intended to write some blessings for himself. There were clearly so many river lanterns, but he didn’t leave a single one for himself… now that I thought about it, I suddenly felt very upset.

MC: Xia Yan, wait for me here for a bit!

Xia Yan: Eh? Where are you going?

MC: I’m going to borrow something - I’ll be back immediately!

After finishing speaking, I ran towards the mask shop. If I hadn’t remembered wrong, there would be what I needed there.

—

Seeing me from far away, the boss waved to me, greeting me warmly.

Mask Shop Boss: Eh, young lady, why did you return on your own? Did that young man not bring you to see the river lanterns?

MC: That young man… do you mean Xia Yan? Boss, how did you know about it?

Mask Shop Boss: This isn’t some secret - all the shops around here know that that young man was going to bring his girlfriend here today.

MC: Girl-girlfriend?!

Mask Shop Boss: Ayo, looking at the young lady’s reaction, you haven’t gotten together yet.

MC: We actually don’t have that kind of relation between us…

Mask Shop Boss: Regardless of how it is, let me speak some fair words - that young man really is a good person.

Mask Shop Boss: To convince the light event host to rent the space out and let him set up the river lanterns, he worked for us for several days. That’s not some average-level conviction.

MC: So this was also the case… thank you for telling me these things, boss.

If not for this accidental occurrence, I probably would have never known about the effort he had put in behind the scenes.

MC: Right, boss, can I borrow a writing brush from you? I promise I will return it immediately after using it.

Mask Shop Boss: No problem, take it as you please. Remember to bring the pigment with you. Although this is what I use to paint the masks - I’m just afraid that you might not be used to using it.

MC: Thank you, boss!

Holding the tools I had borrowed from the boss, I jogged back towards the shore.

—

Xia Yan: What did you bring these for?

Under Xia Yan’s dubious gaze, I held up a river lantern.

MC: To write blessings.

MC: Look, the river lanterns have so many sides, so I can still write a lot of words.

As I spoke, I lifted the writing brush, writing on the empty side of a river lantern - “Hope Xia Yan will be healthy, as well as happy”.

Xia Yan: Eh? Are you writing this for me?

MC: Of course. You’ve busied yourself for so long for these river lanterns, so they must have your name!

MC: Didn’t you ask me earlier about what wishes I wanted to make into reality? More than finding my phone back, this is my actual wish.

Xia Yan: …

Xia Yan looked at those two rows of simple, short wishes on the river lantern, sinking in a short moment of silent contemplation. Right after, he took the brush from my hand, also writing a few rows of words.

MC: What are you writing? Why’d you even cross out a row - let me see.

Xia Yan: No can do - if it’s seen, it won’t come true.

MC: Eh?! Then does that mean that the ones I saw just now won’t come true?

Xia Yan: It won’t be a problem. Either way, there are so many of them, so some of them have got to come true.

MC: That’s true… then I’ll write a few more for you as well!

Xia Yan: No need - this one is enough for me.

He winked at me, then immediately placed the river lantern lightly, back into the water. Right then, magnificent fireworks burst successively in the sky, radiantly breaking apart the darkness, as if to draw all sceneries into an enchanting dream. Following the current, the lanterns drifted further and further away, gradually bringing the wishes to the distant horizon.

“Rather than the excessive wish of being able to always stay by her side, I hope more to protect her as she peacefully, prosperously lives her life - regardless whether I’m there, and regardless of in what way.”

PHONE CALL

Sorry, I was just feeding Peanut and couldn’t respond to your message in time.

I’m also just like you - I’m feeling very reminiscent about the taste of sugar people. The sugar prepared by that boss really was unique.

You liked it because I made it? Hehe, you’re probably saying this to make me happy.

Right, if you like eating it, how about I go find the boss tomorrow to borrow his equipment and make you another one?

Other sugar people shapes… about this, it might have to wait for some time. I have to practice.

You also know that I’ve never been good at drawing since I was small. I’d drift off each class and the teacher would always use my works to make everyone laugh.

The reason why the sugar person I gave you was made well, was because I made it according to you. 

During the time when I went away, I would think of you often. Over time, you became branded deep in my head.

I got caught… I didn’t agree to those kids back then because I only knew to make one kind of sugar people. I can’t just casually give “you” away to other people.

You’re talking about working for the stalls? I was just in charge of working the cash register and hawking the wares - the sugar person I gave you was my first official work.

As long as you like it. I’m willing to try anything you like.

How about we make a big sugar person family next time, with uncle and auntie, and me and you.

In fact… this is, by far, not the only thing I want to do with you. I want to make more memories with you.

I will make up for those lost eight years’ worth of time.

[fatehbaz]

Seeing your posts about the Carolina parakeet made me think of an essay I read in Orion Magazine recently. It's called "Forever Gone" and it's on their main page if you're interested :)

Nice, thank you so much. I just finished reading this essay, after your recommendation. A very, very fitting recommendation for my interests, thank you.

‘Wishing for a contrived, humanless wildness forwards a practice of belittling — or ignoring altogether — “colored” land connection. My own dark-hued roots are mired in the soil of the American South. When I drive by, fly over, or walk through most places “down here,” I can see and often feel the actions of my ancestors who changed the land. By connecting the pain of that past to what we see now, I pay homage and deepen my personal connection with place. Yes, it’s an exorcism of past pain, but also a progression toward helping others see the land’s real history, and perhaps to become reconnected with the land. [...]  Black ducks and black rails in “managed” rice impoundments are reminders of what was created by a cruel society on the backs of black people. We can’t separate one from the other.

Love that. (This essay was written by J. Drew Lanham, apparently a wildlife ecologist with interest in ecology of the American South, “songbird ecology ... and African American land ethic.”)

Thing I evangelize about: the complete interweaving of ecological degradation and human injustice; inseparability of ecological change and human death, both expressions of the same violence. And I really like how the author here used the parakeet as, like, a case study of exactly this: the inseparability of ecological and human violence. I also enjoyed how much they seemed to love the landscapes of the American South, and I liked how passionately they described the beauty of a cypress swamp. I like how they describe some of the bittersweet beauty of pastures, partially-degraded Southern landscapes, some native plants mingling with crops and monocultures, without idealizing the non-native plants and altered landscapes; just, some very nice descriptions of the region. Another of my interests they discussed: criticizing the problematique concept of “pristine untouched nature” and how it erases long Indigenous histories and local/traditional environmental knowledge.

But, the cherry on top, which I really appreciated: I like criticizing how “collection for science” is often performed carelessly, and constitutes a form of possession or entitlement, not entirely different from when anthropologists/botanists appropriate Indigenous knowledges, and so I love when people interested in ecology do the right thing and call-out the violence inherent in collecting practices, and I like when ecologists call-out other ecologists for lack of compassion. So I was happy when they said this: ‘Collectors — many of them obsessed hoarders — shot whole flocks for the sake of “science.” The museum bird that wouldn’t release me from its gaze likely fell in the name of “knowledge” and the need to possess a rare thing with no thought of its extinction.’

On the inseparability of ecology/environment and human/cultural institutions/injustice, liked this: ‘In the convergence of demands for human dignity and freedom, and nonhuman survival and existence, there are islands of empathy that emerge between our braided-river beings. Human trade and trafficking; genocide; driving other creatures to extinction — it is all built on a corrupt human belief that some are worthier than others.’

Another thing I really liked is how the author didn’t just focus on birds. Like, though the essay/story may have been mostly about parakeets, they referenced all the other interconnections, the other things that brought the parakeet’s realm to life: katydids at dusk, the cypress swamps.

And I liked the name-dropping mentions of multiple different famous swamp landscapes of the American South: ‘In the rendering of an old-growth, south-Georgia swamp forest, I could hear the sociable shrieks and jabbering of roosting flocks echoing from the hollow trunks of the buttressed bald cypress. [...] The parakeets flocked in and out of wilderness that exists now only in ragged remnants of parks and preserves. On the edge of the great swamps we now know by names like Congaree, Great Dismal, Black, Okeefenokee, Four Holes, and Kissimmee, and all along the great South Carolina swamps swollen to flooding by rivers like the Savannah, Edisto, Santee, Cumbahee, Black, Little and Great Pee Dee, Waccamaw, and Ashepoo, the birds screeched and wheeled in a unison.’

Especially this: ‘Do we readily reveal these chapters in history? Does conservation bear a responsibility to illuminate the dark corners where not only birds and beasts have suffered, but humans have as well’

“Ecology” as a “profession” or “science” or field of study doesn’t get to sit this one out and claim “objectivity,” a “scientist” in this case doesn’t get to ignore the historical context. “Ecology” necessarily involves directly grappling with those human institutions, violences, hierarchies. It’s not that “human activity affects the environment, obviously, therefore historical analysis is relevant to ecology,” It’s that ecology is human history, human history is ecology.

Thanks again! I’m glad I got the opportunity to read this. :)

[emdop]

The Fuckening: Modern YA Fantasy Misunderstands Feminism and Effective Plot Structure

Alright, mother fuckers, buckle up. Like most book lovers, I read many books and I’m always searching for the next one that will make me develop a hyper-fixation. Nothing beats the rush of finding media so good that time loses all meaning and you’d sell your soul for the next hit of content. The amazingness directly results from being rare. So in between the moments of stuffing your face full of your favorite characters, the other books are read. The ones that could have been good but aren’t successful. The ones with the lying, beautiful covers used to lure readers into forking over crumpled cash while hugging the hopefully precious gem. Then, all the words are read and the covers are closed, and there’s only the silence of disappointment and mediocrity.

Anyway, I read a book. Shocking, I know. It had so much promise and as I delved into the first fifty pages; I thought I found a winner. Then it started to sink in a massive Titanic kind of way. This book was Wicked Saints by Emily A. Duncan (this essay/rant will have spoilers and will discuss the ending). I’m prefacing this rant with a disclaimer, not because I’m trying to side-step backlash, but because I feel it’s worth mentioning. This is all my opinion and if you loved this book with all your heart, that’s awesome! I understand why someone would spend time reading, writing, and engaging with it. It’s possible to recognize the weaknesses of a piece of media and still like it; I just happen to not like it because of those weaknesses. Returning to my point, the pitfalls, mistakes, and blandness of this book are rampant throughout Young Adult literature, particularly in Fantasy. As a writer myself, I’m not immune to committing the same sins, but I think it’s valuable to examine why and how these unfortunate tropes keep appearing. I have several points I want to explore in this essay, but the main two are the pretend feminist values and poor writing craft.

Part One: YA Book Feminism and Bland Female Characters

Wicked Saints is marketed as a book about a girl who can communicate with gods and draw power from them. Her magic is rare in a world full of blood magic users and as the war between her country, Kalayazin, and the opposing force, Tranavia, clashes on her front porch, readers are led to believe that she’s an integral part of how this war will end. I was here for this. I was so ready to scream about this book to anyone who will listen. Now, I’m screaming about it for a different reason. 

Nadya, our human incarnation of the god’s Walkie-Talkie, is not like other girls. She’s special and powerful and exceptional. At first, I bought this lie, much like I did with every other book like this one. I thought, finally, here’s a badass heroine who will take charge of her life and wield her powers to create a lasting peace or at least kill everyone. When the readers meet Nadya, she’s living in a monastery to hide from Tranavians since her magic is so rare and powerful, they’re sure to seek her destruction. Then, they find her, or rather Tranavia’s prince, Serefin, (a boy-general, because adults don’t exist in YA) does. Serefin tries to kill Nadya, but she escapes with help of Forgettable Best Friend.

Lately, I’m reading a trend of books that build a “strong” female narrator by giving her some sass, adding a rare but useless magic, and having her not die. Then they slap words like empowering, feminist, or well-crafted into the marketing campaign and call it good representation. This isn’t quite what happened with Wicked Saints, but I had the impression that Nadya would be more than what she actually was in the book. The hardback cover has the words “Let them fear her,” engraved into it for gods’ sake. I thought she was going to at least do something. 

Okay, there was one time she did something. While on the run from Serefin and the other Tranavians, Nadya and Forgettable Best Friend find a group of misfits being attacked. Nadya, in the confusion of who’s an enemy and who’s an ally, asks the gods for help. One responds by vanishing all light for like ten minutes or something. This scene is one reason I bought the lie that Nadya was going to be a Bad Ass Mother Fucker, but this is the only time I remember her using any kind of significant power. In fact, once the plot gets going, Nadya is cut off from her powers almost entirely. I’ll get to that later. Back to the group of misfits, which includes a broody, yet totally handsome Tranavian, Malachiasz, and bam, we’ve found the love interest. Malachiasz is a Vulture which I understood as a privatized military group that’s ruthless, skilled, and detached from the world (no family or friends). So, Nadya hates him on site, but Malachiasz has defected and has like emotion now. They argue a bunch and exchange heated glances. 

Now that we’ve introduced our male characters (Serefin, Malachiasz, and some other dude in the misfit group), our plot gets going. There’s nothing wrong with introducing characters to start a plot, that’s how story-telling works. What I’m finding frustrating in this book and many others like it, is that the male characters make most of the decisions. They show the most autonomy and participate in the drama/action. Serefin is leading an army, making command decisions, and drinking copious amounts of alcohol (I don’t have time to get into the drinking to drown your feelings is Not Good argument, but know that this book doesn’t call out his addict behavior). Malachiasz and his band of friends are planning to assassinate the king. The female characters have run away, observed, and turned out the lights. Where is the girl who’s inspiring fear in the gods themselves? Where is the girl who’s fighting for justice and her future? Granted we’re only a hundred pages in at this point, so I’ll excuse it for now. 

In the meantime, the king calls Serefin back to the palace for Rawalyk, an event where noble women compete against each other to win the prince’s hand in marriage. Nadya and crew travel to Tranavia and disguise themselves as people participating in the event. I forgot to mention that the Tranavians only use blood magic and hate the gods, and in an effort to keep them out, the king put a barrier around the country, which keeps Nadya from using her powers. Convenient. And so very disappointing. As per their plan, Nadya has to get close enough to the king to kill him, so she uses Rawalyk to gain access. Nadya offends one of the other suitors and the suitor challenges her to an Agni Kai—sorry, different story, a duel, rather. Nadya has to pretend to use blood magic, so she can hide her true identity. Near the point of winning the duel, Nadya realizes it’s to the death, but she doesn’t want to kill the girl, so she tells her she’ll spare her. Then, Malachiasz uses his magic to end the girl’s life. Again, there are male characters forcing the plot forward while the female character’s agency is stripped. 

We’re now over two hundred pages in and Nadya hasn’t done shit except for worry about her crush and follow other people. Our narrator is a “powerful” girl, but the most interesting characters are boys and only male characters move the plot forward. I guess, who needs a personality or autonomy when you can have a love interest? To make matters worse, in the middle of all this crap, she’s thinking about her male best friend who died, but is coming back in book two, and not even Forgettable Best Friend who is actively trying to help them. Nadia thinks to herself “Kostya. You’re doing this for Kostya, she reminded herself,” (Duncan 256). Kostya was in this book for like five pages, who the fuck is this bitch? Why does anyone care? Why can’t she be going on this quest for herself, for her country, for her supposedly beloved gods? 

YA Fantasies keep prioritizing and valuing the actions of male characters over female ones. There are exceptions, but they only prove the rule. I’ve seen this repeatedly in books like City of Bones, Caraval, Shadow & Bone, Harry Potter, and now Wicked Saints. Some of those books are my favorite books, but if I never critique them, I’ll never want better or search for books that do more. I want to see more YA fantasies treat female characters like their male ones. I want female characters who participate in the narrative, make mistakes, experience success, and, I don’t know, have some ambition and goals. They should use their talents and be integral to the plot, because Wicked Saints’ plot still could have happened without Nadya.

Part Two: Character Development and Effective Plot Structure

Let’s get into this dumpster fire of an ending. While staying at the palace and pretending to be a suitor to the prince, Nadya uncovers parts of Malachiasz’s past and finds out he’s the leader of the Vultures who’s disappeared for reasons unknown. Nayda gets captured and tortured and learns that her gods may not be who she thinks they are, and she has her own power that she can always use. And does she use it? Not really. She questions everything, but not Malachiasz. Him, she makes out with. Nadya’s group and Serefin’s converge and they trust each other because they both want the same thing: the king dead. Serefin knows his father is trying to kill him and uses the help of the misfits, including, plot twist, his cousin, Malachiasz.

Serefin doesn’t understand why his father wants to marry him off and plotting to kill him at the same time, and eventually, Malachiasz talks about his past. He became the leader of the Vultures and was researching the gods when he figured out, in theory, how to become one. He gave this information to the king and you can imagine how a narcissistic king will feel about that. Malachiasz regrets his actions and runs away. Part of the process of becoming a god involves ingesting the blood of powerful magic users, hence the Rawalyk event and Nadya’s torture; they were collecting blood from the suitors. The king also has to sacrifice the prince to complete his goals. Together, they come up with a plan to corner the king while he’s attempting to perform the ceremony to become a god and kill him.

It all goes spectacularly wrong. Serefin gets captured and killed by his father, but he doesn’t die? I don’t know; there were a lot of moths involved and I was very confused. Malachiasz and Nadya go after the king and there’s a mediocre fight scene. Nadya kills the king but not after like three pages of her debating why Malachiasz is just chilling on the throne and watching this all happen. Malachiasz betrays the group, taking the power for himself. Nadya has the nerve to be surprised and heartbroken. He turns into a bird-like thing and flies out the window into the darkness.

The only time Nadya uses her own magic to do something it turns out to be in service to a male character’s goals. I’m tired and I hope you are too. Anyway, this section’s purpose is to look at effective plot structure. Wicked Saints meanders for three hundred pages trying to tie together a book about war, marriage competition, and religion. When the plot points all converge for the last eighty pages, we ultimately learn nothing more than we did at page 200. If this is a book about villains than why are minimally bad things happening? Why did no one die except for the throw away character at the book’s beginning? Why aren’t there more consequences for the character’s actions? My questions are answered by pointing at the poor plot structure and terrible character development. This book is run by boring characters whose actions don’t amount to anything, and that’s when they actually do something. Characters should evolve or devolve depending on the narrative. They should enact the plot, not have the plot happen to them. The few times we get characters changing, it’s followed by the most basic plot twists. Looking at Malachiasz in particular, we meet him while he’s plotting to kill the king with his new acquaintances, then he meets Nadya. She calls him a monster a million times, and he doesn’t deny it. They plot to kill the king again. By the end, we find out he’s only in this for himself and surprise, he’s not a good guy! Did not see that coming.

Continuing my rant on Malachiasz, Wicked Saints has one of the poorest representations of anxiety that I have seen in a long time. (Note: right after this I read Truly Devious and boy, the whip lash I had from that transition. From one the worst to one of the absolute best). Before I rip into this terrible character development, let me discuss two things: one, I don’t know if the author suffers from anxiety. It’s possible that Duncan experiences it very differently than me, and this may be good rep for someone else (I have my doubts about this since I can shred it like wet tissue paper, but I’m willing to mention this possibility). Two, considering Malachiasz’s turn to The Dark Side, it may have been purposeful bad representation. Essentially, he never had anxiety, just needed Nadya to trust him. Okay, with that out of the way, let me scream this: ANXIETY IS NOT CUTE. IT’S NOT A FUN, QUIRKY CHARACTER TRAIT. PLEASE FOR LOVE OF MEDUSA, STOP USING MENTAL ILLNESS AS A CRUTCH FOR YOUR INABILITY TO WRITE COMPLEX CHARACTERS.

The only thing we know about his anxiety is that he bites his nails. Sigh. I’m sorry it’s just that the more I think about it, the angrier I get. Wicked Saints came in an OwlCrate box and in the letter from the author to the reader she describes Malachiasz as “a boy whose earnest anxiety hides monstrous secrets.” Except anxiety doesn’t hide what you’re feeling, in fact it often puts your deepest fears on display for other people to see and usually at the worst moment. Anxiety has a million symptoms, many of which can be observed from the outside and thus easily incorporated from the point of view of a non-anxious character. Here’s a list: panic attacks, hyperventilating, shaking, hypervigilance, irritability, restlessness, sweating, tense muscles, difficulty sleeping, and fatigue. Sometimes Malachiasz displays fatigue and irritability, but it’s when the other characters are in the same headspace, so it doesn’t count, because it can easily be chocked up to circumstance, not mental illness.

If we ignore the author’s implication that his anxiety is earnest and assume that he faked it to gain Nadya’s trust, we get to a problem. The book never explores how he lied or parses through where he’s genuine, so, I have to assume that he was supposed to have anxiety. He’s called a monster so many times I got irritated. Aside the fact that it’s offensive to make the only mentally ill character a “monster,” it’s downright annoying to read a million times. Malachiaz is an attempt at a morally gray character. He makes decisions that only benefit himself, but sometimes he saves lives or kisses a girl, so some parts of him are still good. I’m okay with that, what I’m not okay with is piss poor characterization. People with anxiety can be bad! But if you make your villain anxious, it should be for a better reason than he needed a personality.

After I finished this book, I looked through some Good Reads reviews and many of the users pointed out something I hadn’t noticed. To use the blood magic, characters had to cut themselves, and reviewers found they didn’t like how this glorified self-harm. Many suggested that a trigger warning for self-harm should be placed at the beginning or the magic system should have been handled with more sensitivity. As someone who does not have personal experience with self-harm, I won’t elaborate and instead let other people make of it what they will.

There were two parts of the book’s description that sold me on it: one, the girl talks to gods, and two, a star-crossed romance. We already know how disappointed I was about that first plot point, now let’s talk about the other disappointment of the day. A fantastic rule going around on the internet  goes “if they have to kiss for you to know they’re in love, it’s not good romance.”

I will say something that may offend many people, but hopefully you’ll stick with me. Young Adult Fantasy books have bad romances. They’re underdeveloped, poorly crafted, and overused. Romance is my favorite genre, and I love seeing it in other types of books, but many times YA fantasies have the worst romances. Despite being constantly undervalued, romance sells and adding it to books usually helps pique people’s interest. But you don’t just “add” it to your book, because romance is hard to write. Hold on, I need that in capital letters. ROMANCE IS HARD TO WRITE. Good romance comes from nuance, established trust, chemistry, and gradual character developments. If a writer doesn’t do those things, you get insta-love, which isn’t satisfying or believable.

Wicked Saints tries to do an enemies-to-lovers trope. Nadya and Malachiasz don’t spend enough time together to develop a proper friendship much less a romance. They have legitimate reasons to hate each other and neither of them seem to change enough for it to be justified that their feelings have evolved. Nadya loses contact with the gods, but that should serve as a crisis of her own faith, not an automatic belief in something else. Her willingness to ignore Malachiasz’s obvious red flags is beyond frustrating and I can’t believe the book wanted me to be surprised that he betrayed the group at the end. Anyway, it’s time to make some conclusions, otherwise this essay/rant will never end.

Part Three: How Did We Get Here?

Wicked Saints is not the first to do these exact mistakes, and it’s here because of its predecessors. What other books do we know that have a Russian culture theme, a useless female narrator, and a love interest who’s bad? That’s right. I’m about to bring up the internet’s infamous Grisha trilogy. Throughout my entire reading experience, I was struck by the similarities of these books to the point where I was sure I was reading a fanfiction AU of Shadow and Bone. These books are so similar it had me wondering about plagiarism (I’m mostly kidding about that). The Grisha trilogy and Wicked Saints use the same tired tropes and rely on the readers need to self-insert to make up for the narrator’s lack of personality.

How do we get books that shout about feminism but don’t incorporate it? Books are written by humans and humans live in a flawed world. Art doesn’t exist in a vacuum and so many of the things we create are flawed. Sometimes, what we meant to write isn’t what is written. An author may have every intention of creating strong, complex female characters, but through the difficulty of writing, poor planning, and a host of other reasons, the result is a bland, useless character. Many times, these characters are touted for having magnificent powers, but they never seem to use them or if they do its only in small ways. This happens, in part, because if the character is all-powerful then there’d be no plot, so to create tension the author takes the power away, scales it back, or adds an obstacle in the way of using said power. This is all well and great, but it often leaves readers feeling like the book duped them into believing this character is special. People don’t like to feel as though they’ve been lied to. In my opinion, “Gotcha” plots and character developments result from bad writing.  With Wicked Saints there weren’t “Gotcha” moments so much as there were “please stop being a dumb bitch” moments. Nadya wanted to fall in love Malachiasz and the whole time I kept asking myself why. He’s a saltine with pretty eyes and fucked up nails. Then there’s Serefin who instead of dealing with his problems, he gets drunk. His big plot point is that he doesn’t die and turns into a swarm of moths for a while which would have been cool if they explained it in any kind of manner.

Stopping the proceeding rant, I should make conclusions and end this before it gets more out of hand. YA fantasies aren’t progressing the way they should, and you could point to several books that do incredible things, but they’re in the minority. YA authors need to make their narrators complex and fully formed instead of literal sawdust. We need authors to create better female and non-binary characters who have the same agency as their male counterparts. They should stop including romance in the first book. Let the characters grow and breathe for a hot second. Gradual bonds made through several books are always more satisfying and well-crafted than a rushed romance in book one. Also, people in the publishing industry, please, please, please use sensitivity readers. Or maybe search for books written by Own Voice authors. I know for a fact there are incredible writers creating amazing works out there. I’ve interacted with them. Someone publish their books before my head explodes.

Tag list: @weathershade​ @queenoffloweryhell​ @raywritesblog​ @saistudies​ @vesaeris-writes​

[deathbyvalentine]

Harrowing Commissions

Sebastian

The light from the fire flickered, making the shadows in the room shudder and jump. Starting, the maid in the armchair jumped up, adding another log to the flames. It was a room with a lot of shadows - part bedroom, part parlour and part study, odd objects littered side tables and shelves alike. The walls that were not dominated with bookcases were dominated instead by windows or portraits. The room was dark, the windows blocked out by heavy curtains. In all of the clutter, it would be easy to miss the young man lying in bed, surrounded by pillows and cushions, holding a faded blue book in his pale hands. 

Only his cheeks had colour in them - a feverish flash of rouge. His hair and eyes were dark. His lips moved in silent prayer as his eyes flickered over the paper thin pages. A cough came over him, wracking his thin body. His attempts to muffle it did no good - the maid immediately bustled over with a tray of bottles and ointments. Propping him up, in a business like manner she rubbed a foul smelling liquid onto his chest. It appeared to the job and the odd whistling his breathing had taken on faded. She lay him back down and began to fluff up the pillows around him, fussing in such a way it betrayed her fondness for her patient. 

 He caught hold of her wrist, stopping her in her tracks. “It’s soon, isn’t it? It’s going to be soon.” She stared at him, unsure of how to respond. It didn’t matter. A few more moments and he picked up his beloved gospels, resuming his study.

*   

Alice

The clock was just chiming... a number when the latch to the servant’s entrance to the kitchen lifted. The hearth fire was still burning, so when the young lady slipped in, she managed to avoid kicking over the mop and bucket just to the side. One hand held her boots, the other her skirts to keep the rich fabric off the dirty stone floor. Now safely inside, she placed the shoes down beside the door and collapsed onto the bench alongside the long wooden table. Idly, while looking into the small flames of the fire, she picked a grape from the fruit bowl and popped it into her mouth, enjoying the sweet burst of flavour. 

She pulled the pins from her hair, letting the curls cascade down her back. She winced a little and inspected her fingertip a moment after. One of the jewels had caught her funny and sliced her. A small bead of blood welled up. She blinked at it for a moment before placing her finger in her mouth too, soothing the wound. Outside, the sun was beginning to creep up over the horizon, painting the sky in pinks, indigos and purples. She should slip to bed before the breakfast preparations begun - she knew her mother had slipped an extra coin to one of the servants to report on her, but she wasn’t sure which one yet. If she slept now, she had enough time to be woken for breakfast and pretend to be as fresh as a daisy. 

She stood, stretching once. Then she disappeared up the servant’s corridors, knowing the route to her room by heart. Her boots lay forgotten by the door.

*

Thomas

“Behold, a story for the ages! Be dazzled, wondered and amazed at the power of - “

No, that’s not right. You’re not writing a circus side show. 

“Come and be welcome in an epic spreading centuries. Heroes, lovers and villains convene in this - “

You’re not writing a fairytale either. Think Thomas. What are you trying to do here?

“This year, a new play arrives that will reveal not only the essence of characters within it, but those who watch it. Watch the story unfold and let it awaken something within you too. We all wear masks. The hero, the lover, the villain.... This is an invitation to find out exactly what is behind yours. If you dare. If you’re brave enough.” 

That’s the advertisement done. Now I just have to finish the damn thing. 

*

Eloise

“He loves me... He loves me not. He loves me... He loves me not - ” Petals drifted to the floor like morning snow, to be crushed as the woman paced barefoot, releasing their too-sweet perfume into the air. The floor was almost slick with them, the top layer bright and pink, the bottom little more than browning sludge. Her skirts trailed, disturbing the petals enough to reveal how many lay beneath. It seemed that everything in the room was coated with petals or dust. But still, she walked.

“He loves me.” She stopped short at the mirror, allowing a slight smile to spread across her beautiful face. She reached out with gloved hands, her fingertips just touching the spotless surface. Her fingers left a slight smear and she recoiled, finding the bell on the sideboard to frantically call a maid. The mirror being obscured simply would not do. She stepped back and let the bustling girl come in with a cloth, the door creating a semicircle of clear floor. The girl didn’t touch anything else, didn’t even ask about the petals. She cleaned the mirror and was gone in a flurry of business like activity. There was a breath, a moment where everything was still.

“He loves me not.” The slow chant resumed, almost lyrical in its cadence. Another petal tumbled to the ground. Another step was taken.

*

Charles

Day 15 “... My sleep was greatly disturbed last night by a number of dreams. Such visions! Such phantasms! I believe this is a sign that my work is taking me closer than ever before. A number of studies has found that sleep is when the mind is most susceptible after all. I plan on capitalising on this by distilling a mineral (imported from Italy) into a chemical that is supposed to induce a most coherant train of thought. Lucidity and revelation are of course, key and I have high hopes for this latest experiment granting me fresh sight and new contact.”

Day 20 “Well, that did not go exactly to plan. The chemical did indeed induce a number of wonderful sights, but as always, the body was not willing. My hands trembled so violently it shattered the simmering glassware and I was forced to retire, bedridden for several days. Every failed avenue is a clue however, and I refuse to consider it an utter waste. In brighter news, a letter has arrived from my Vatican friend’s expedition. He promises to send his logbook as he believes there are some encounters I will be interested in. I await this with baited breath - he has always given me fascinating data before.”

Day 23 “A small break while I was forced to deal with one of the children’s latest indiscretion. Did the good lord grant us families purely to curb the progress of the human race? I can only assume so. No matter, tomorrow I try some new components from America, promising to engage with the energy that sits around us all, invisible but present all the same.”

*

Elizabeth

She tutted and held the glass up to the light, turning it this way and that. Placing it back on the table, she snapped her fingers at a passing maid, steering her towards the sparkling glassware. “Do you really think this is good enough?” Not waiting for an answer, she shook her head. “There are still fingermarks on the stem. Polish them again. I shall check on your progress in an hour.” 

Sweeping from the room, she entered the busy hallway. Preparations were underway. Everywhere you looked there were maids carrying fresh linen, silverware or carpet beaters. Butlers converged in corners, talking about how best to organise the cloakroom, the game room, the parlour. A smile tugged at her lips. She was rarely as pleased as when the house was alive like this. There was something pleasing in the shifting bodies, the business of it all. It reminded her of a great beehive of which she was the queen. 

Pausing on the upper landing, she rested her hands on the (gleaming, shining) banister. The house would be perfect for the ball, of this much she was certain. If only her family were as easily polished up.  Or perhaps as easily put away as the silverware was, only to be brought out at special occasions. With an amused smile, she shook the thought out of her head. They would be perfect. She would make sure of it. When she set her mind to something, she never failed.

*

Georgiana/Mystery Member #1

She held a fork up to the light, turning it this way and that. Frowning at what she saw, she clicked her fingers at a passing maid. With an eyeroll, the girl sloped over, hands placed in her pinafore pouch in a most slovenly manner. Letting the fork fall to the table with a clatter, she clucked her tongue. “There are still marks on the cutlery. Fix it. At once.”  “Yes ma’am.” The maid replied, though she could swear she saw a hint of a smirk on her face. Her cheeks flushed red though she kept her head up high. What impertinence. She may not be the lady of the house but she still deserved respect. Elizabeth would never deal with such nonsense from her servants and yet these girls thought they could get away with it with her. She stalked from the room, being sure to make her heels click on the floor in a way she thought of as most stately. 

She got the same response when she found a smudge on the guest linen, two scullery maids very almost giggling. Hating herself as she did it, she invoked the most compelling line she could think of. “Of course, if you would like me to explain to Elizabeth why your work is not up to scratch, I would be happy to explain.” Instantly, their smiles disappeared and a solemnity appeared in their eyes. The rush of power only lasted an instant. It was borrowed, after all.

One day she would be married and she would have her own house, bigger and grander than this. She would have maids that straightened their backs whenever she swept past and butlers that refused to lift their eyes to look at her directly. She would hold all the keys to the house on a chain on her waist and she would never have to ask for something twice. One day. 

*

Mystery Member #2

Dearest friend, I write to you with a matter of great urgency. Too long I have been silenced and now the time has come for me to finally beg for help. I am not sure what may befall -

I am not sure if harm will - I am sure great harm will befall me if this letter was discovered, so I beg you and your servants to be discrete. If you investigate, keep my name off your lips and papers. You must be wondering why I chose you. Well, your kind and - 

your gentle and good - 

Well, you would believe me. The constabulary would surely find me mad if I approached them with my tale of woe and I would be in Bedlam before the month was out, which would suit my captors fine.  To be clear, I do not want them harmed - I do not want violence -  I just want to escape. A safe haven. An oasis. Away from this den of iniquity and sin.  Eagerly I wait for your reply. I know you shall not fail me. With love.

*

The House

It sat, quietly for now, among gardens and fields. If arriving by carriage, it snuck up on you. A turn in the road and there it was, looming and large, casting shadows easily around it. If arriving by foot, it simply waited for you to arrive, watching you with its many windows, glistening in the sun. 

It had been used to house soldiers once and it hadn’t forgotten it. If you looked closely enough, the marks were still there. A scuff on a door frame where a sword had caught passing through, the basement with a forgotten box of munitions sat, covered in cobwebs and caked in dust. Soldiers had slept here, loved here, mourned here. Entire lives had been acted out with the house as a constant backdrop.

It used to house monks and it remembered this too. In its carvings, its windows, in paintings of men that nobody could recall the names of. There was a reverence that could not be simply scrubbed away like old paint. It lingered like perfume. It stayed in the bones of the place, the memory becoming as essential as the bricks.

A ball was to be hosted soon enough. The servants and the family prepared, gardeners tidied the grounds and merchants came to and from carrying exotic goods. It was not the first party it had seen and it most certainly would not be the last. The house looked its best when filled with people. It was not a place made to be empty, to be unusued. It always had a purpose and its purpose now was simply to host. 

[signaturedish]

Can we have some SG Megatron and Original Harry interactions?

I should really stop dragging my feet and just make a companion fic huh. This is a pretty good setup for getting anon-inspired chapter ideas though! In like a plotline journal entry kind of way lol.

Warning! I already said I found this dynamic interesting so this got long again. 

They meet almost immediately. SG Megs pops into existence right in front of his counterpart, who is rarely separated from Harry.

His psychohistory readings warned him something like this might happen so SG Megs is up and alert from the start. introducing himself and curiously peering over his sparkling’s counterpart while feeling out his own mirrored self. Harry seems quieter. He peered up at the intruder with kind optics, sitting in a claw, wrapped snugly around a digit. His wings fluttered pretty cutely too- oh! He forgot to reply to other Megatron.

Harry was fascinated by this not-Lord-Megatron. He didn’t resemble his lord much at all, more vulnerable and stable all at once. It was sort of like someone had smashed Optimus and Lord Megatron together and then gave him a unique inquisitive edge. He wanted to know more about him, felt something in him blossom happily when not-Lord-Megatron bestowed such a warm smile on him while being introduced. The way only Lord Megatron’s praise had affected him in the past.

They meet again by chance in a hallway, bereft of watchers for the moment. SG Megs can’t resist coming to a halt, Harry does the same. It’s like an atmosphere, a tension soft and sensitive as Ironhide or Ratchet. It’s so strange to find it again in a Decepticon base. 

SG Megs asks a simple question- what his day was like, where his favorite spot is, what his favorite game is, if he’s tried flying yet, etc- he meant to stop, but he could listen to Harry chatter forever. Polite, intelligent, too soft-spoken but so eager to please. Whenever he stalls, a prompting hum or grin gets him right back on track. 

Harry delights in his encouragement, no shadows to fight away or stiffness to overlook as the mech stares down with optics that sparkle. He finds the courage to ask his own questions, what was his favorite color? Where he’d set up base in his own dimension, what exactly was psychohistory- and they were off.

Conversation like raindrops on a windowpane, light and constant connections, easily converging as they delight in each other’s thoughtfulness and curiosity. They’re sitting in the hallway, Harry on SG Megs knee without either of them realizing they’ve moved.

Has SG Megatron ever spoken to someone so adorable? Who felt so strongly like a child after his own make and model? He had priceless comrades, but so very few seemed a kindred soul, the type of mech who would look up at the sky and see constellations instead of balls of gas. This sparkling had listened to the legend of an array of stars he’d never seen with such wonder it stalled his fuel pump. 

Then a panicked Thundercracker finds out what happened to their missing sparkling and shatters the lazy afternoon they’d crafted in half an hour. 

Oh right. this Harry wasn’t his sparkling. Of course, how silly, how crazy to ever mistake- they were so different! There was an odd ache in his chest as Harry left, an uncomfortable twist to his gears as he went to find SG Harry. It was ugly and unbecoming, he didn’t dare acknowledge it. When he picked SG Harry up, he resolutely ignored how quickly he could summon an illusion of picking up another sparkling instead. It didn’t hurt when he tried chatting with SG Harry and got blown off, that would be unfair to even compare. It didn’t sting to see Harry cuddled up with his counterpart that night. 

Of course it didn’t. He was better than that.

Harry’s elated to have found such a great friend, someone who helped sooth that anxious pang whenever Lord Megatron wasn’t in his sight. Someone with such natural warmth and gentle words, easier to talk to than even Jazz. He was clearly a genius and it was incredible how genuinely interested he was in what Harry had to say. He only wished they would meet more often, it was ridiculous how scarce he was.

When they do meet again for more than a few seconds it’s before Lord Megatron’s throne, being coldly stared down by his own counterpart. SG Harry has been mistreating his fellow sparkling, SG Harry should be punished and forbidden from making Harry cry.

SG Megs bristles, they’re just children, rivalry and scuffles are to be expected. He knows his sparkling had probably distressed his counterpart but he was a first frame sparkling and such things are just growing pains. Rules will be enforced, but no ultimate forbidden actions or harsh punishments.

It’s fair, he’s practical, he even shushes SG Harry when his tantrum gets too shrill. He was perfectly behaved.

So why did he feel so awful? 

Why was it impossible to look away from Harry as he trembled through his account of being bullied, hesitantly dragging out the confession as though he wasn’t sure what they wanted to hear. He should want to comfort his sparkling after being reprimanded but all he wanted to do was cuddle Harry until his shaking stopped and his wings raised high. 

Not even that, he wanted to take Harry away from Megatron and show him how to pet a sparkling the correct way. They needed more coverage and surface contact, dammit. 

He already had a sparkling, he cared for SG Harry, he did. Was he really so low he’d covet his own counterpart’s child too? 

He watched gloomily as Harry found a quiet spot to put together a little puzzle piece box set, allowing helpful suggestions from his Decepticon comrades to fly overhead as he chirped his thanks. 

Lord Megatron gazed on in satisfied silence, SG Harry was trying to unscrew a bolt from Barricade’s ped without him noticing. 

SG Megs was standing at the back, wishing with all his might that he could have the right to plop in front of Harry and watch up close as he slowly understood the best way to reconstruct the image was by starting with the edges. He was almost there- SG Megs could see it. Methodical, careful, enjoying the process as much as the result. He was going to pick it up fast. He was already proud of him.

SG Megs wanted to teach this child prealgebra next 

He wanted to be Harry’s parental unit. 

Frag.

A few days later Harry hunts him down to ask if he’d help with his gliding practice that day with huge, shining optics and SG Megs replies with all seriousness ‘you are literally killing me’.

He still fights the other seekers for position as flight teacher for the rest of time. It’s only by the grace of already being a parental unit as well as an adept survivor of ambushes and assassination attempts that he lives in the base after that though. 

Okay I’ve got to stop at some point.

Bottom line is that they’re kind of incredibly compatible and just lonely enough for this to be a Huge Deal for them. Harry’s still loyal to his lord, but it’s insidiously easy to incorporate SG Megatron into his life without it feeling directly like a challenge to his actual guardian. 

Megatron has got to keep on his toes, SG Megs even makes learning math kind of fun so you can see the kind of threat he’s up against. 

[briiqht]

;   hello out there, it’s me! a nic, here to bring you my two lovely babies theo & faye.  below the cut, i have intros + info for both of my darlings.  please let me know if you’re interested in plotting by liking this, and i’ll message you via ims accordingly! i am in the discord chat, but gcs make me nervous  (  especially ones on discord  )  so i don’t know if i’ll be using it much personally unless i’m directly mentioned. ;;;; hopefully that’s not too much of a bother!

──THE HARVEST HAS BEGUN!   did you hear? the high council invited THEO YORKE  a RESIDENT OF BIELEFIELD representing the SHADOW GRACED lineage. they might resemble JUNG JAEWON. they’re known for being an UNAWARE BLOOD KISSED within their community, while noted as TALENTED all the while being ALOOF. according to the council it’s noted that HE appears to be TWENTY FIVE years old and look about TWENTY FIVE. they’re INDIFFERENT to be in bielefeld.  they intend to work as a DJ @ THE TRESOR NIGHTCLUB in the town until the harvest ends.

born in south korea but was quickly adopted out to parents based in london.  (  yes, he has an accent.  )  his parents are the yorkes who are … still in london!! they’re a pretty progressive and modern thinking couple who both bestowed that line of thinking on theo.  they really supported their son when he was younger with all that he wanted to do.  even though he was adopted and knew it from a young age, he never really felt like his parents weren’t .. his parents? he was with them since he was a baby after all.

they’re a mixed race family, which got some looks from others that they didn’t pay any mind to.  mom is black, dad is white.  they’re a family, colour of skin does not matter in this house.

theo doesn’t have any other siblings, adopted or otherwise so he was the pampered only child.  his parents, as stated, were always supportive of theo’s pursuits and that included music.  he always wanted to perform in front of others, but hasn’t had a stroke of luck in that department yet.  he likes to travel and do small gigs though, which is how he found himself in bielefield for the time being.  while he’s trying to look for places to perform, he’s also working as a dj at the local nightclub just for some extra cash.

as theo was adopted, he has no idea about his shadow graced lineage.  whenever he was around a supernatural being before and heard thoughts that weren’t his own, he brushed them off as headaches or possibly dehydration .. something, anything to explain away the weird things that would happen around him.  

this of course doesn’t explain the capability of precognition, but his adoptive parents always thought he was just .. gifted.  they know nothing of the supernatural aside from the things that theo went through, so while they understand and support him, they didn’t know how to help him with this in particular.

since moving to bielefield recently for work, his power has exponentially started to affect him and he’s not really sure why.  but it’s definitely because of all the supernatural creatures that are converging in one spot.

──THE HARVEST HAS BEGUN!   did you hear? the high council invited FAYE ROWLAND  a VISITOR OF BIELEFIELD representing the ANGEL lineage. they might resemble LILY COLLINS. they’re known for being a HEAVEN SENT ( ANGEL OF LIFE ) within their community, while noted as ATTENTIVE all the while being MELANCHOLIC. according to the council it’s noted that SHE appears to be AROUND FIVE HUNDRED years old and look about THIRTY. they’re UNHAPPY to be in bielefeld.  they intend to work as an ADVICE COLUMNIST in the town until the harvest ends.

currently a relatively young heaven sent angel.  the angel of life lives hers like a phoenix, constantly living and dying and being reborn from the ashes.  she’s cursed to repeat the cycle that she watches over with a keen eye.  though she’s an ever constant presence, this incarnation of herself is still quite young in heaven’s eyes; a mere 500 years give or take a few.

faye has a lot to prove in order to live up to her role as the angel of life, considering all her past selves have done great things with the cycle itself.  as faye is still young, she’s truthfully a little naive, but generally wants the best for all life on earth whether that be human, animal, or the earth on which she walks.

as the angel of life, many expected her to take on a role as a doctor, or perhaps a veterinarian but she chose to become an advice columnist instead.  she figures that guiding others through their path of life without taking them on as a charge is still part of her duties as an angel, and there are a lot of people lost on their road.  she borders on thinking of potentially becoming a psychologist or psychiatrist, but prefers instead helping people one on one through her advice column for now.

if she happens to take on a charge which is .. quite frankly, a little rare considering she devotes almost all of her time to them, it’s usually from birth as she guides them through the life cycle until their death.

has a tendency towards melancholy.  faye is rather empathetic, and her heart is too big for her bones  -  it leads her to feel the sadness the world feels because she sees it all with the wide eyed naivety that only the young can have.

a little torn about living on earth for the time being.  she misses heaven, misses the warmth of being in the clouds and close to the sun  -  misses the way she could always wear her wings with pride,  it definitely feeds into her melancholy, however  -  there are parts of her that really do enjoy being bound to earth for a time.  she likes being close to the people of earth and finds it easier to learn about them in this way.  now that she’s here, she’s trying to live like them.

[thebandcampdiaries]

Trouble’s Afoot - Looking For Parking

A combination of various alternative and indie influences, converging in a very special way.

Trouble’s Afoot is a music project that was conceived by Jordan Cooper, a musician based in Queens, NY. Jordan has a special fondness for indie rock, folk, and other styles, making for an incredibly diverse attitude. Now, the project is actually a 3-piece band, which means there is more room for different sounds and textures! The line-up consists of Jordan Cooper (lead vocals, guitars, and multiple other instruments), as well as Dave Fox (Bass, backing vocals, some guitar) and Christopher Roberts (Drums). The group has a really unique sense of chemistry, and together, these 3 guys are able to combine many different styles. From alt-rock to indie, to pop-rock, anything goes!

“Looking For Parking” features 12 tracks, each blurring the lines between various genres and definitions. In fact, one of the most notable aspects of this particular release is definitely the sheer sonic variety that you will encounter on this here record. The opening song, “A Boy My Age” is a short track (clocking in at under two minutes). After a quirky acoustic intro, the band chimes in at full blast!

“You Say But You Don’t Know” follows with a really infectious guitar riff. This song makes me think of some of the best early British Invasion bands, including The Kinks and The Who (well, before they turned into 70s stadium rock gods!)

The third song on the album is named “Sarah Made A Serenade”, and it has a really cool alt-rock / post-punk vibe, with catchy guitar melodies and great vocal lines. This one precedes “Every Right Hand,” another song under 2 minutes, which packs a lot of energy, in spite of the small footprint! The song leads to “Don’t Be An Idiot.” The attitude of this song is just as upfront as its title, with memorable melodies and great hooks that won’t get out of your mind so easily. This has a cool punk-garage attitude that makes me think of early Cloud Nothings or Wavves!

“And I’m Gone” has a really cool 60s vibe - this song really makes me think of some early Rolling Stones or The Byrds, with a really organic sound and cool vocal arrangements that match the music to perfection.

Coming next is “All I Ever Wanted,” a song with a personal set of lyrics. This is a song about looking for a change - about wanting to overcome one’s backgrounds and “get out,” hopefully somewhere better. “Cellar” is a song that sort of makes me think of Nirvana, not much so for the sound, but for the intriguing lyrics - I like the child-like energy of the wordplay, and somehow the receptiveness of the later motif really works on favor of this track!

“I Care About You” is the classic boy-meets-girl song. This is a very earnest love song, which reminds me of the way I felt when I was a teenager, struggling to really share my feelings and go talk to the girl I had a crush on! Ultimately, this is a very sweet song, with a really cool arrangement and a nice vocal performance to liven it up.

“The Usual Way” is a really edgy track, which immediately strikes for the catchy melodies and a great intro that makes the main chunk of the song even more enticing!

“Everyone Believes Me” is one of the most poignant tracks on the record, and perhaps one of my favorite ones. I love the combination of quality music and good lyrics, and I can definitely relate to the sense of inevitability of life’s end in loneliness, really exposed in the last two lines of this track: “Like all of you, I’m Lined up to die / No one’s ever on my side.”

Last, but decidedly not least, “Dust Town” is a perfect curtain closer for this release. It brings the record full circle, and it really goes a long way, with a poignant and direct arrangement. This song could almost be a lyrical “Cousin” to “All I Ever Wanted” because the themes definitely intersect!

All in all, I’ve really enjoyed the sound and feel of this release! This album has a fresh, young sound, yet it has a tone that reminds me of some of my best records from the 60s, and from the early punk bands of the late 70s as well! In addition to that, this album also makes me think about some of my favorite modern indie groups, such as Cloud Nothings, Courtney Barnett and legends like The Strokes and Arctic Monkeys.

Find out more about Trouble’s Afoot and do not miss out on this project. You can listen to “Looking For Parking” directly through Bandcamp at the following link:

https://troublesafoot.bandcamp.com

We also had the chance to ask the band a few questions: keep reading to learn more!

I love how you manage to render your tracks so personal and organic. Does the melody come first, or do you focus on the lyrics the most?

I’m a songwriter and my songs were written on keyboard and guitar. Sometimes I write lyrics and the melody kind of forms in my head as I sing them to myself, sometimes I find an interesting chord progression and then work a melody onto that, that’s how You Say But You Don’t Know was written.

My drummer took care of the beat. I could not even tell you what he’s doing!

Do you perform live? If so, do you feel more comfortable on a stage or within the walls of the recording studio?

Answer: I stopped performing live regularly around 5 years ago; I find it a stressful endeavor, though I still like to do it once in a while. Being on stage is incredibly uncomfortable, and being in the walls of a recording studio is also uncomfortable. Being on stage is exciting though, sometimes euphorically so, and being in a recording studio is artistically fulfilling (you feel like you’re working on something special, at least when things are going well.) That being said, the hourly cost of a recording studio assures that you can’t feel too comfortable in one.

I’m probably most comfortable in my bedroom studio, but that environment leads to a lot of laziness and procrastination, whereas recordings from a recording studio have a certain urgency and focus to them.

If you could only pick one song to make a “first impression” on a new listener, which song would you pick and why?

Answer: I Care About You. I struggle to find a flaw in it. It rocks my brains. I love my vocal performance (a rare thing for me to admit to), I love how revved up and energetic the band is, I think the mix holds together the most, and I’m really proud of the lyrics. I also love that I put in a recording of my bass player yelling “YYYEAAAHHH!” at the very end. Easy to miss, though.

What does it take to be “innovative” in music?

Answer: I think more about this in a lyrical sense than on the music side of things. It still amazes me to hear songs on the radio with lyrics YOU’VE HEARD 1,000 TIMES BEFORE. I will not let a song out into the world until I’m reasonably sure no one has heard these words sung before. And to do that, I think of specific things from my life that no one else could possibly know about (see: A Boy My Age) or have said already, and hint at them in the lyrics. I do wonder, however, if the general public is concerned with this stuff, considering who the popular artists are these days.

Any upcoming release or tour your way?

Answer: I’d love to go on tour but I don’t know how to do it! And I can’t afford it! It’s 2018, how can anybody? But I do have exciting new releases coming out very soon. My musical project with my girlfriend, Kristen Gudsnuk, which is called “Sally,” has a three-song EP finished up, which will be released shortly on our Bandcamp page and streaming everywhere. It was made in fancy, fancy studios and sounds like a million bucks!

The next Trouble’s Afoot release is already being worked on, it’s a sort of sequel to Looking For Parking, culled from the same drums and bass sessions of that album (12 more songs.) A little darker, a little more focused too. After that, the 3rd Trouble’s Afoot album, made mostly in my bedroom, is called Party Guy, and is a concept album about having a bad time at parties. It’s the most ambitious, exciting music I’ve ever done. It’s actually almost complete, but my gut tells me it’s a perfect “3rd album” instead of a 2nd one.

Anywhere online where curious fans can listen to your music and find out more about you?

Answer: Oh, you bet. My two Trouble’s Afoot home-bases are Bandcamp and Soundcloud. My Bandcamp has all of my official complete albums (including a children’s album I made a long time ago!), but my Soundcloud is full of live songs, demos, instrumentals, etc. It’s exciting!

Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/troubles-afoot

Bandcamp: https://troublesafoot.bandcamp.com/music

My main website is www.jordancoopermusic.com, if you are in need of songwriting or composer services. I’ve done music for The Daily Show with Trevor Noah, and countless Youtube shows, podcasts, etc.!

[the-foxwolf]

Story through Supplements

Despite however much we love the characters, the game, or the inclusivity of the company, at the end of the day, Wizards is in the business to make money. Supplemental sets are a great way for them to squeeze out those extra dollars we might have been holding back. Either by printing powerful or otherwise hard to acquire rares and mythics (such as the Masters sets), or by making the set format specific (such as the Commander and Conspiracy), or entirely unique (such as Archenemy and Planechase). We get to enjoy the new stuff and they get to literally reap the rewards.

However. These supplemental sets serve an additional function for us. Join me as I discuss how Supplemental Sets help tell Magic’s Story.

(Learn from the Past: Dragons of Tarkir) (Art by Chase Stone)

Gather `Round! It’s Story Telling Time!

Introduction

As much as I despise the man, Urza’s entire story is fascinating. Unfortunately, the tale of his struggle against Phyrexia is one that is well beyond most player’s knowledge. I don’t fault Wizards for their manner of story distribution. Those were different times. 

(Urza: Vanguard) (Art by Mark Tedin)

Even I, who love sharing stories with people, find it difficult to tell the summarize the tale of of Urza  Planeswalker because it’s such a rich story with so much detail and depth. I never feel like I do the story justice. Most of Magic’s novels have now been translated into e-books. (And I strongly recommend them throughout the Urza story and up until the Time Spiral cycle. I emphasize The Brother’s War, Planeswalker, and the Kamigawa series.) But even so, Urza’s story isn’t something the majority of the MTG players know. A great loss indeed. An understandable loss, though. 

One of the best ways of Story Telling available to wizards is through the use of Supplemental Sets. Let's get started.

Recalling Characters

This is the most obvious purpose of Supplemental Sets is to recall old characters. Freylaise and Teferi are excellent examples of old, well known, beloved characters finally given a card. These are fascinating, powerful, characters who would have normally been impossible to reprint as the Old Walkers that they were. Commander has given us the chance to see these people as they were, the chance to reminisce on the stories of old, and the chance to connect younger audiences to the past. Other examples include Ramos and Sidar Kondo.

(Ramos, Dragon Engine: Commander 2017 Edition)  (Art by Joseph Meehan)

Some characters definitely need a new card. The best example? Gerrard Capashen. Sweet Sigharda did they mess that one up. The star of the show for many blocks and when they finally print him, he’s utter garbage. He definitely needs a new card. 

Whenever old characters are given new cards, it always sparks interest among the younger crowd. This gives people such as @vorthosjay and I, among others, the chance to answer questions and introduce people to stories they would otherwise never have cared to learn about. But now, with these old characters having a card, players will be casting their Commander often. Eventually, people are going to want to know who it is that they’ve been relying on for so long.

Meeting Old Friends

People like Bruce Tarl and Ludevic have existed in the lore for a while now. They, like many others, have been referenced in flavor text, card names, or even mentioned in the Magic Story, but never given a card. Which is fine. Perfectly makes sense. There will always be more names than space for characters.

Among the many characters that can be pulled from to make new cards in Supplemental Sets, Hal and Alena of Kessig are among the most demanded cards- as far as my experience has been. People like that are hard, if not impossible to get a card in any other way. Without Supplemental Sets, we would have to wait until we visited Innistrad again, there would have to be space for them as a card in the sets, and there would need to be a development hole they can fix. Even if we went back, there would be no guarantee we’d see them.

(Ludevic, Necro-Alchemist) (Art by Aaron Miller)

I consider the facet of Supplemental Sets different than Recalling Characters in that the presentation of these old friends is that we know of the character, but don’t actually know the character. We know plenty about AND we know Teferi. In contrast, we’ve heard about Ludevic, but we don’t know who he is. For all intents and purposes, Ludevic was essentially a new character to us. We just happened to have heard many things about the man, but we’ve never actually met him.

Presenting New Friends

Supplemental sets have given us the opportunity to retroactively introduce story elements. Nahiri, the Lithomancer and Ob Nixilis of the Black Oath are two examples. Unlike Meeting Old Friends, Presenting New Friends allows Wizards to give us a character on whom we know little to nothing about. From someone like Vial Smasher, we expect something explosive. We’ve actually met her in a story. Which would make her fall under the category of Recalling Characters. However, with Nahiri, all we knew of her could be summarized in a couple of sentences. Supplemental Sets gave us the chance to meet this mysterious, yet vital, character.

(Nahiri, the Lithomancer: Commander 2014 Edition) (Art by Eric Deschamps)

What makes Supplemental Sets particularly useful is that they provide a seamless outlet to introduce the characters. Trying to incorporate an old character into the modern story would be a challenge to do elegantly.  However, with Supplemental Sets, a quick biographical summary can resolve the situation. 

Clarify Misconceptions

Another utility of supplemental products is the value of retconning and clarification. Let’s look at Atraxa, for example. With a single card, the misconception many players had about Elesh Norn having killed Urabrask and Sheoldred was clarified. The Grand Cenobite took over their territory. But she didn’t kill them. With a single card, they helped clarify things. 

(Atraxa, Praetor’s Voice: Commander 2016 Edition) (Art by Victor Adame Minguez)

I can’t think of any instances in which Supplemental Sets have directly retconned anything. But the existence of Supplemental Sets provides an avenue for them in case they ever needed to.

Peek at other Planes

One of my favorite things that supplemental products provide for me is the opportunity to peek into what’s been happening on other worlds. We recently had the chance to peek back in Ravnica and see the Orzhov and the Golgari storylines develop through stories related to Mazirek and Karlov. It gave us the chance to see more of Vrazka, of Teysa, and of Tajic. The amount of conversation the simple introduction of these stories provided was wonderful. 

(Ezuri, Claw of Progress: Commander 2016 Edition) (Art by James Ryman)

In addition to allowing Wizards to give us bits of storyline that will inevitably converge, it also gives us the chance to remember things we might have forgotten. In Conspiracy 2, we saw Koth is still alive and fighting. In Commander, we are reminded how tremendously, how hopelessly, the Mirrans were defeated by the Phyrexians. We cannot forgot how terrible the Phyrexians are, or let their memory fade. Make no mistake. These things are a terrible force. One of the Big Three Villainous Entities of Magic if you were to ask me.

But also, it lets us see things that need to happen over time. Ezuri, Claw of Progress is an excellent example. We are reminded how oppressive the defeat of the Mirrans was. We see in the Conspiracy product that Koth is still somehow miraculously alive and kicking. 

Tease New Worlds

And one last function Supplemental Sets serve with respect to Story Telling is the ability of it to tease us with new worlds. People such as Sashika and Licia and Tana. When they presented Licia, people started speculating about her relation to Sashika. Worlds teased, yes. Certainly worlds to come. 

(Licia, Sanguine Tribune: Commander 2017 Edition) (Art by: Magali Villanueve)

Another place we’ve seen worlds teased is in Planechase. Places like Vyrn and Kephalai for example. Some are placed that were teased hinted at what may yet come in the future, and others of things we know for certain are coming, and some that have shout-outs to planes in older stories- such as Equilor. The oldest plane in recorded history.

Conclusion

Magic’s Story is rich and vast and had so much potential. But Standard Sets can only provide so much at a time. Those Vorthoses, like me, who crave more story can find ourselves satisfied by enjoying the supplemental sets. And, of course, Wizards gets to squeak out the few remaining dollars our pockets have after spending what we have after they squeeze us with the Standard Sets. Like the addicts we are. We hungrily consume.

That’s all I have for today. Thanks for reading. If you liked what you read, hit that “Reblog” button. For more articles and short stories from me at “Story Telling Time” hit that “Follow” button. See ya next time!

[jonathandavidlange]

Comic Theory Pt. 2

Just Because We Can Doesn't Mean We Should.

Three Panel Technique

On my third book, GRAVES, I employed a technique of almost always using three panels for each page. After my second book, I wanted a format that would bring to the comic medium a space that the characters could inhabit, along with an emotional continuity that comics rarely possess. After doing some experiments, I landed on a three-panel technique. While writing the rough draft and storyboards for GRAVES, I happened to read Osamu Tezuka's Lost World and The Mysterious Underground Men. Both books were written in the late 40s and utilized a three-panel technique on each page. This gave me the confidence to make all of GRAVES a three-panelled comic, and I had such a good experience making the comic that I've continued to utilize these techniques for the stories I have written since.

In working with the three-panel system, I have wondered if I am truly utilizing the comic medium to its fullest capability. My goal is to stabilize the perspective and approach to comic storytelling so that techniques used in film can be utilized in the comic medium. Frank Miller said that he went into comics to make them more cinematic, and that he stays in the industry to make them less so. With the production of his Sin City as a film, it is clear that any comic style can be translated to cinematic language, making Miller's statement a moot point.

So why use the three-panel method utilizing fewer comic techniques (less panels, less word balloons, less sound effects, duller colors, etc...) to make the comic language more like film? Because I believe the mediums are very related and share a lot of the same principles. They share visual narrative principles and techniques like being a visual medium, the use of cuts or edits (shown by panels and page turns in comics), and the use of texture and tertiary story devices (such as sound effects, set design, and sound design).

Emotional Integrity

Film consistently achieves a level of depth and drama that is very rare in comics. Every year there are multiple films that move me deeply and push the medium forward in daring and personal ways. In an average year there is rarely even one comic that moves me as much as five movies that have come out that year. From self-produced to indie to Marvel and DC--every year I am hard-pressed to find a comic that resonates with me to the same extent as current films. (Some examples of what came out the year I wrote this, 2016: Captain Fantastic, Moonlight, Manchester By The Sea, Neon Demon, Nocturnal Animals, and Arrival to name just a few.)

Imagine a year in comics where there were several comics that achieved a level of specific and personal emotion like the film Moonlight, written and directed by Barry Jenkins. In this film we follow one man, Chiron, who is played by three different actors. We see him grow up and encounter all of the complexities of living in Miami. We also see him struggle with his mother as a drug addict and try to navigate life with his father figure who is a gentle and loving drug dealer. What could easily become a niche art-house film is instead universal because of its approach to heartache, identity, and family. It is constructed in the most professional and wonderful way. Everything converges to make one fantastic story that washes over you, and I would dare anyone to not be shaken emotionally by it.

Some examples of earnest, raw, and nuanced intelligent emotion in comics includes contemporary comic artists Aidan Koch and Austin English as they achieve an abstract, emotionally-rich level of storytelling. In the graphic novel by Sam Alden It Never Happened again: Two Stories (2014), it is raw and powerful, yet refined and subtle. The emotional intensity and keen observation of human interaction and existence is profound and completely on par with the most understated and nuanced of films and novels. There are indie masters like Terry Moore and Alan Moore who consistently have vivid characters and build rich worlds. Masters of the past like Osamu Tezuka and Harvey Pekar continually tapped into genuine human emotion and shared insight into the human condition. Recent superhero stories by Geoff Johns, Justice League (2012), and Scott Snyder, Batman (2012), often capture the fun and energy one had when reading superhero stories as a child. They both add layers of humanity to superhero stories that are often stock and cold when written by others.

People may argue that graphic novels, specifically biographical stories, do achieve the same level of emotion that a work like Moonlight achieves. I cannot deny subjective emotion that wells up in a reader. But I can argue technique and structure. Using the example of body-horror stories, stories that focus on the fragility and decay of the human body, the structure and depth of character in a graphic novel like Charles Burns’ Black Hole (2005) cannot compare to a film like Andrej Zulawski's Possession (1981).

Before I jump in, it needs to be said that people may also argue that even comparing stories within the same sub-genre is like comparing apples to oranges. But I disagree. I believe Dracula (1931) can be compared to The Shining (1980). Two films within the horror genre (not of the same sub-genre), but with very disparate stories. Even still, the central focus of blood, family, and control of one's mind could easily spark thoughts of comparison and contrast.

Black Hole's structure jumps around, and we never focus on one specific personal conflict or really get to know even one character very thoroughly. We get more of a wide vantage point in the story. Everything is skin deep. Whereas Zulawski's Possession structure focuses on a family and places them in a familiar and terrifying backdrop: West Germany with the wall as a large and looming presence, almost a character in and of itself. Possession gets under your skin, you become part of it's mania. Black Hole appears to be more interested in a scattershot of characters and experiences. Burns’ story takes the analogy that body-horror innately brings with it and uses it to focus on a coming-of-age story in high school. This is an obvious metaphor that does not have much depth to mine. The depth of one character’s disease is never felt because it is never directly penetrated to the “basement floor” of a character, and, because of this, I found Burns’ story forgettable. Zulawski’s Possession, on the other hand, starts in the middle of a story we know nothing about. Everyone is acting strange and the locations they inhabit are equally bizarre as well as bare. As we get into the film, the reason for the strangeness becomes deeper and deeper, more personal, and alienating. By the end of the film, our head is spinning with what is real and what is fake: both in what we are seeing, but also in a relational context. The film is about alienation of the self, of the other--family, friends, and everyone else, of a career, and of the state. It is an incredibly complicated, nuanced, and personal film. It’s effect stays with you and every time you revisit another layer is revealed.

Structure

The reason that I use a three-panel, per page technique is because I feel one of the primary things missing from comics is a structure in which to set the narrative so other aspects of storytelling can shine and provide layers to the plot and characters within. An example of some very rare techniques to find in a comic that are commonly utilized in film are consistent frame composition, understandable perspective of a location as well as knowing where a character is within it, a steady and consistent flow from panel-to-panel--that does not exclusively utilize close-ups with bare backgrounds--like smooth and seamless editing does in a great film.

Something nearly all comics have in them consistently is a plethora of random panels. Randomly placed, randomly sized, and often framed very close or showing little detail beyond the character at the focal point. Comics can be hard to read for the uninitiated and feel like the story is being told in a randomly presented and ordered way. From superhero to indie, this is just how comics are made. Good questions to ask a writer or artist of a comic (or to think about while reading any comic) is why is that panel placed right there? Why is it that size? Why is it that shape? Why is it focusing on that character or action and nothing else? What else is happening in the environment around the character I am looking at, and why can’t I see it? Search Youtube for a video essay on any famous director, and you will find a plethora of video essays describing why Stanley Kubrick, Wes Anderson, John Carpenter, or Chantal Akerman--to name a very few--shot and edited the way they did. I dare anyone to find a video essay on the structure of a very famous book like Alan Moore's From Hell (1999). (As of the writing of this I found several surface level reviews of From Hell, but not a substantial essay. For comparison there are at least five essay/theory videos on the first page of Youtube for John Carpenter’s The Thing (1982).)

Why is a plethora of seemingly random sized panels a poor layout strategy for a comic? It’s not. There are a multitude of comics that use this format to an amazing affect. But unless you are Osamu Tezuka, Dave Sim, Gabrielle Bell, Terry Moore, or Dash Shaw, odds are your comic will be cluttered, confusing, bloated, and underutilized.

Comics Vs. Novel Vs. Film

When read, a comic book is spread out over two full pages at once. This lets the reader subconsciously see both of the pages at once and in part. The reader can see what is coming, but having not yet read the two pages, there is no context for the information they have. This is an enormous advantage over film. Cinema is ruled by time and must share its information clearly, consistently, and adequately. If the information in the film is not delivered in this fashion, the story will come across too fast, too slow, too jumbled, or too confusing. A film tries its hardest to keep you under its spell, and when a component is off, at any time, you will be thrust out of the film.

Prose is hindered because it lives inside the reader’s head, and it’s easy for an author to digress down countless rabbit holes often muddying up a plot with too many details and too much information. A film is hindered because it has such a brief time to tell it’s story it must often rush through the details, leaving out many sequences from which the novel was derived. Comics have the opportunity to use techniques from both mediums, and use them better. The comic book can utilize the freedom and tools found in both novels and film. It can use prose to describe just as easily as it can use an image to tell the same story. It can use whatever it needs to to make the story clearer, more emotionally resonant, and intellectually stimulating.

A novel works very hard at communicating what an image can say instantly. A novel is not bound by time or physical space to work within, like a film. And unlike a comic it can and must describe, in subjective prosaic detail, what the author sees and intends for the reader to see. A novel is a unique and subjective experience because the format and structure of a novel can be radically different from author to author. A film has a given structure at which every filmmaker must work under. A novel has proven writing strategies and guidelines, but given that, Thomas Pynchon’s Gravity’s Rainbow (1973) is a radically different experience compared to reading C.S. Lewis’ Chronicles of Narnia (1950). Watching Stanley Kubrick’s 2001: A Space Odyssey (1968) is narratively very different than but structurally very similar to Pete Docter’s Monsters, Inc (2001). The difference between authors can be like the difference between a grand feature film William Wyler’s Ben Hur (1959) and a home-made five-minute-long Youtube video. Sure, they are both made by using a video camera, but beside that they couldn’t be more different.

Time

More than film, comics share a close relationship with television. Shows are often released a week at a time using individual episodes to sculpt the narrative arc of a season to tell one long story. This is very similar to what comics do, but instead they come out monthly, with less time to tell their story, as the average comic is roughly thirty pages--the average drama TV show is 45-60 minutes. In this way it could be said filmed narrative is more efficient than comics. But if you read a story by a master comic maker like Osamu Tezuka, every panel will give you so much uncluttered information, that the story doesn’t feel rushed or incomplete.

Another advantage the average TV drama has over monthly comics is that they are made and released in seasons. They are given a break to re-adjust, get some distance from, and fine-tune the following continuation of the narrative. Comics are typically unending monthly narratives. They are often made as quickly as possible, with little time to flesh out and iron out narrative and artistic wrinkles. If comics were released as seasons, with a proper amount of time to give space and breathe to the creative process, the average quality and it’s given control of a book would increase. Imagine a show like Breaking Bad (2008) never having any break between seasons. The writers, directors, and actors would become so exhausted and burned out. It would be easy to assume they would start viewing the process of the making of the show as a hill to climb and complete, instead of a journey to explore and spend time with. Comics rarely have this luxury.

No Right Way

Obviously, there are no “right” ways to make a comic, just like there is no “right” way to make a film, TV show, or write a novel. But over the decades of each of these mediums’, their evolution has increased and allowed for radically diverse approaches of creation. Comparing the short films of the Brothers Quay to a director like Stanley Kubrick is amazing in the radical spread of approach, sensibility, and sheer variety of perspective. Comparing a superhero story from the 30s to that of one of present day, or even comparing a contemporary superhero comic to the average contemporary indie comic, one will not find much difference in narrative content, structure, or approach to art.

I believe the three-panel technique is a way to address this common lack of growth in emotional richness and depth as well as structural complexity and integrity. By unifying the approach to panels, by focusing on perspective, and by providing a space for unique and specific location design the average comic reader will not be concerned with trying to keep up with a comic and what is going on in it. The reader will instead be enveloped by the story and art and get lost just like one does with a good novel or good filmed piece of art.

Final Thought

A final note on a unique aspect of comics is its two-fold use of image as a lexicon and comics as writing. Every day we see so many images and signs that we don’t even notice the majority of them any more. All it takes is the octagonal shape and red color, and we know we are to stop our car. All we need is a triangle on a remote, and we know that means “play,” just as a square means “stop.” We see stripes and patches of color, and we know it’s a country’s flag. These make up a lexicon of images that mean and communicate concrete thoughts and ideas--as in reading the combined image of letters spelling out “S-T-O-P” in sequence, we know exactly what to do.

In much the same way, comics are a powerful medium that often utilizes narrative and visual information, and all within a glance. See a costumed character flying with a fist outstretched, and we know this is a hero. If we see a figure with their head tilted down, eyes looking straight ahead while smiling, we know this is the villain. Film cannibalizes itself, referencing shots from films of the past, providing more layers and context to both shots. Film can’t take something like a simple shape, like a character’s body, or color in a rapid glance and tie it to a narrative that has complexity and purpose in the same way that a comic can. Film will always be locked into figures, stances, photographic composition, mise en scene, and editorial motion. Comics can and do deal with a wealth of symbols and images that are varied and unlimited. These symbols and images can be used in a narrative with an added layer of depth because of the use of image as lexicon.

When writing, like when playing an instrument, inspiration can strike, causing a speed and emotion to be felt, portrayed, and converted into art. Jack Kerouac’s prose, Thelonious Monk’s arpeggios, Allen Ginsberg’s poems, Jean-Michel Basquiat’s paintings--comics can achieve this level of spontaneity and locked-in emotion. Treating comics less like a piece of marble or a wooden chair and more like the sketch of a landscape or the initial draft of a song would be a healthy step in the right direction.

Comics can achieve something as close to the heart, as common, and as intimate as writing. Utilizing a lexicon of images to provide narrative information and context, comics can be written--not just drawn. The images themselves can be the words, and they can be written passionately, powerfully, and personally. They can be grand and heroic. They can be small and proletariat. They can be short, simple, and minimal. They can be complex, difficult, and long. Comics are amazing because they define what they are. They are cinematic. They are literate. They are visual. They are narrative. They are art. They are ours.

[mushbabe]

Mass Cartoon Crossover AU

heyyyyy its uhhhhhh another fucking au writing from me

ties into this comic i did here, which i am making a sequel to

so if you wanted to hear my explanation for how shit like Who Framed Roger Rabbit, CN City, and canon crossovers might possibly work, clicky that readmore friend it’s about to get deep and overly thought-out

so like. basically: when a creator creates something, the universe for this something exists on another plane. the characters are all real, just more or less materially inaccessible to people on our plane. there are points in the various planes of existence where our plane and their plane meet, be the points natural or artificial. these points of meeting were used to film things like Who Framed Roger Rabbit and Space Jam, where visceral, fleshy organisms like ourselves could stand alongside the 2-D manifestations of our own minds. both humans and cartoons could enter the opposing side’s realm, but by no means is it natural or healthy for the state of the worlds, not to mention for the individuals crossing dimensions. as such, the scenes in both WFRR and Space Jam where any one person was not in their respective domain were filmed in intervals...

so now we’ve got two planes: ours, and the plane of our creations. like previously stated, each creation has a universe in which it exists and lives, a place where it is given purpose, a story, stuff to do, etc.. compared to our universe, these worlds are all incredibly small.  though the sizes can vary wildly: from the universe of Ed Edd ‘n Eddy, which is more or less encompassed by the cul de sac that they live in, to the universe of Adventure Time (which feels expansive, but really is only made up of the places shown or mentioned in the show, and is by no means infinite like that of our own.) lets imagine that all of these universes are kind of tied together. think about wreck-it ralph when i say that there is a central location, a city probably, that they can all converge in and exist within. 

to keep things homogeneous and as easy to digest as possible, lets assume the only universes that are inherently tied together are the universes from the same kind of media. 2D televised cartoons would all be tied into one place. 3D televised cartoons would converge in a different place. Anime/Video Games/all that good shit would tie in somewhere else respectively. We could imagine that this is because these similar universes are close in proximity as a result of being similar. and because they’re all so close, they all have an established point where they all meet. contrasting this, the convergence of two different kinds of media would be extremely rare and hard to achieve, but is do-able, and has been exploited by characters before (cite the Jimmy-Timmy Power Hour). for the sake of keeping with the natural order, these ties are temporary and will break off easily. 

to illustrate this converging of similar universes, we could imagine this structure as a large central bubble with a bunch of other smaller bubbles surrounding it, each of them connected to the middle one by a thread. 

DIRECTLY CONNECTED WORLDS

but !! these small, individual worlds can also be connected to each other directly! some of these connections are inherent, as they were part of their design upon their creation. a good example of this: the universe of Gravity Falls and Rick and Morty would have a natural thread connecting the two. 

some of these connections can also be forged. these connections are typically the result of a crossover episode, and would exist between the worlds of Futurama and The Simpsons, and The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy and Codename: Kids Next Door since they all had crossover episodes with each other. In all likelihood, the lifespan of these connections is probably dependent on factors like the earnestness of the episode(s) in question (whether they were done for a cheap cash-in or because the writers were genuinely invested in these characters meeting) and how compatible these universes are (things like similar visual styles and how much sense the crossover makes. the crossover between The Jetsons and The Flintstones makes way more sense thematically than the crossover between Kim Possible and Lilo & Stitch. 

THE HUBWORLD:

this is best understood when you think about the old Cartoon Network City bumpers that CN used to play in between commercials. They were large, semi-realistic urban environments where all of the characters from the programming of the time would interact with the world and with each other. CN City could be thought of as a district of this larger city where all these worlds converge. this is a place that, regardless of art-style or compatibility, everyone can just exist alongside each other. 

so not all of the cartoons live here. lots of them live in their respective worlds for their own reasons (their show may still be ongoing and they need to actually be there for it to happen, or maybe they just prefer their own world) but they may make trips into town to run errands, visit, attend university or even commute to their city jobs. however, after a character’s show has run its course, plenty of them make the decision to move permanently to the city. 

we know that each character can leave their original universe and travel to the central connecting one, but can they leave the central one to visit another person’s universe? i would say yes. probably not for extended periods though. unless there is an existing connector between the two character’s worlds, visiting wouldn’t feel comfortable, and the characters probably just wouldn’t want to. i imagine that, while it’s not exactly illegal or impossible to visit, staying for a long time is frowned upon. again, we can refer back to wreck-it ralph for comparison. visiting is fine, but eventually you need to go home.

IMPORTANT FIGURES:

a character’s role in the city and to others is determined by a lot of things. usually, one would find a job they can perform with their unique skills and/or powers. I’ve headcanon’d the roles of a lot of characters already. some ideas I’ve had:

The Powerpuff Girls are easily the ones in charge of protecting the city. They head Homeworld Security, the various police departments, and have a lot of people working under them. They can often be seen patrolling. 

the city is headed by a City Council and a Mayor (there is also a Head Judge in charge of the court system, but they don’t determine any legislation, they just enforce it.) The Mayor is kind of shadowy in the au at first, but it’s pretty obvious that it’s Mickey Mouse. He’s concerned with corporate interests for the most part.

the Council is made up of elected representatives, each coming from different big names in the cartoon world (Nick, WB, Disney, Hanna-Barbara, etc.) The Council Chairman tbh has to be Bugs Bunny. he’s iconic, charismatic, and experienced, and so has a lot of sway in how things operate; it only made sense that he go into politics. a crucial part of the “plot” of this au is that Bugs and Mickey are bitter rivals. It’s understood by most that Bugs should be the de facto mayor, but through underhanded means, Mickey stays one step ahead of him. while Bugs isn’t exactly innocent either, he certainly stands for different ideals. Bugs is definitely a man of the people. 

Professor Utonium is the dean of the university as well as the head of its robotics department, their most successful STEM department. he teaches a few robotics classes. Dexter, Edd, and Phineas would have all studied under him at one point

Without a doubt, Warden from SuperJail! is the warden of what’s probably the largest and craziest prison in existence. Only a mind like his could contain the biggest threats to the hubworld’s wellbeing. 

i’ve thought about the placement of a lot of other characters too, but i only wanted to list here the one’s integral to the structure of the city.

with that said, all of the villains original to the connected worlds are very much still real and still able to wreak havoc on this metropolis. some won’t have a reason to concern themselves with it, while others will certainly make it a target. this includes extradimensional entities like Bill Cipher, Him, and Aku, who wouldn’t exactly be contained in the city jail. a main concern of the city government is how to protect the town from these major antagonists. 

CITY DISTRICTS:

i was talking about districts of the city earlier. another district i was thinking about is Toontown, a space relegated to old fashioned, classic “toons”. Like, Animaniacs / Tom & Jerry / Merrie Melodies / Steamboat Willie / Roger Rabbit -esque toons. the one’s we all understand as the physics defying characters who can pull material from nothing (hammerspace) as well as take a shotgun shell to the face and live. The nigh-indestructible, goofy-ass, slapstick, foundational characters of animated comedy. this is gonna be one of the few districts that is actually somewhat segregational. I imagine that society views toons in a weird, kind of split way. on one hand, the Old Toons are to be respected. they forged a path and laid a foundation in entertainment and have helped bring all of this into existence. on the other hand, Toons are also considered outmoded. classic slapstick has largely reached the end of its run. the iconic white gloves, cigars, and dynamite have all come to represent a bygone golden era full of its own problematic ideals. their shows are analyzed now much like modern psychologists would analyze Freud: no one can doubt the significance of the impact they’ve had, but the faults are widely acknowledged. (for example, modern cartoons would probably criticize older toons’ shows’ lack of diverse protagonists, rampant themes of racism / antisemitism / blatant use of tobacco / objectification of female characters, for being unfunny or unchallenging to the viewer, or for just being visually unappealing as some newer cartoons might believe.) as a result of this mindset, older Toons are the target of some prejudice but also some high respect. it depends on which group you’re talking to. 

List of City Districts

New Townsville (the one filmed for the CN City Bumpers). town hall, banks, business hub.

Toontown (the one filmed in WFRR) - area reserved for Toons

Endsborough - slightly evil, run down part of town. bars, gambling, etc. hangout for the unsavory.

University District - the campus, dorms, student accommodations 

Hillwood Metropolitan Area - expansive, unspecific urban area, main marketplace, apartments, schools. underground cultural haven.

Jump District - upscale part of town, nice stores, ritzy condos. opposite of Endsborough. favorite hangout/residence of hero-types. 

Middleville - suburban residence area, lots of families living here.

Jellystone - large park

CITY GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS

I am also going to list my ideas for these:

Mayor - Mickey Mouse

Chief Justice - MENTOK THE MIND-TAKER (he’s from Harvey Birdman and he’s a great judge ok google him)

City Councilmen:

Warner Brothers / Chairman - Bugs Bunny 

Cartoon Network - Grim

Metro Goldwyn-Mayer - Pink Panther

Nickelodeon - Phoebe Heyerdahl

Hanna Barbara - Top Cat

Disney -  Stanford Pines (not Stanley)

Adult Swim - Dr. Mrs. The Monarch

THE GUILD OF CALAMITOUS INTENT 

as one might imagine, the hubworld is going to be full of both heroes and villains. to manage the inevitable carnage, i thought i’d borrow an organization from The Venture Bros. the Guild of Calamitous Intent’s purpose (in this au anyway) is to fit villains with their arch-rivals and contain the amount of collateral damage their conflict creates. heroes and villains can only fight one villain/hero at a time, respectively. this is to prevent things like all-out fights between huge numbers of villains and heroes, which would destroy a good portion of the city. as well, there is a limit to how much destruction one pair of arch rivals can cause. charges are incurred otherwise. certain areas are entirely off-limits (schools, hospitals, etc. basically they follow the Geneva Convention here). the presence of the Guild would also be a good explanation for why villains only tend to target one hero most of the time. once one villain/hero is defeated, another one can take be fit to take their place. villains and heroes are both ranked in order of power and resources, and a villain is always paired with a hero of equal rank to allow for the fairest fight. arching outside of guild regulations is strictly forbidden and the Guild will hunt down a rogue villain/hero. groups of villains/heroes that are always together (the Teen Titans for example) will count as a single arch-able entity and will be ranked according to their combined power. So in this universe, Slade would be labeled as the Teen Titan’s arch-enemy. 

while the Guild is originally a service for evil characters run by evil characters, they generally play a neutral role in the struggle between good and evil. 

but there are bound to be evil doers who are too chaotic to follow guild regulations. these characters have to act in the utmost secrecy or simply be too powerful to be taken out normally; otherwise, the Guild will act upon them. the heads of the Guild are totally anonymous, and, while they’ve worked with the City before to impose certain regulations, they are independent of the government. All villains and heroes must be properly registered, but registered villains ARE NOT guaranteed safety from Homeworld Security. heroes and the police often work together to take down bad guys, and its a hero’s responsibility to keep their respective villain in check.

ANYWAY that’s what I’ve thought up so far for the overarching premise. I STILL NEED A NAME FOR THE CITY 

i could just call it Big City a la Sheep in the Big City, but thats.... kinda dumb. idk i’ll think on it.

[hundredyearavatar]

General Iroh is incompetent: Defending against Kuvira

This is the in-depth analysis of General Iroh's defensive positions. Throughout the post I'll be asking the question "what would Azulon do?" which will serve to relate Iroh's tactics to what I think Azulon's would have been. The purpose of this post is to berate Iroh, but also to understand my view of the Hundred Year War.

Scouting Zhu Li told everyone that the attack is coming in two weeks, and apparently the General didn't feel it imperative to verify this information. Zhu Li was a scientist and couldn't have known the details about the attack plans, yet the General treated "two weeks" like the gospel. It seems the only confirmational source of information he had was an outpost not even a day out from the city.

Azulon would have sent forth all manner of probes into the Earth Empire territory to find out what Kuvira's plan were. How many tanks, how many infantry, how many airships. Are they all approaching from a single direction, or has Kuvira directed garrisons from around the Earth Empire to converge on Republic City from multiple vectors? Azulon wouldn't have waited for Kuvira to arrive, he would have pushed his scouts as far into the Earth Empire as possible to see the enemy as soon as possible. Even if the intel contained highly detailed plans, it's still prudent to verify this physically.

Tight Formations I've previously written about how during the Hundred Year War the tight formation was abandoned for more fluid and mobile layouts. Tight formation sucks for two reasons. The first is that it weakens attack ability of your troops. Those benders are so bunched together that they can't flap their arms, let alone use their bending against an enemy. The second is that it enhances the effects of the enemies attacks. Bending, particularly earthbending, is an area of effect weapon. I've written about short wall tactics, and the effect of this mobility denial is increased if the troops are massed. The fact that Kuvira was known to have a super weapon cannon type thing means that Iroh should have recognised the ability of the weapon to wipe out his concentrated "defenses" in one blow.

Azulon would have a far lower concentration of troops across a very large area to ensure that they can all dish out their bending. This is the sort of thing that Azulon would have learnt while fighting for his father. At the beginning of the war Sozin used the tight formation, but as the war progressed he released the reigns more and more, allowing his generals to use whatever tactics they pleased. This phase of experimentation would teach Azulon the benefits of mobility and fluid formations.

Bending type separation It's really odd that the troops are deployed in formations of over two hundred of their own bending type. It might look neat, but this organisation severely hinders the effectiveness of the force. If Iroh's army were to engage in combat, the firebender and waterbenders have no means of countering whatever earthbender attacks that come their way. It requires great skill for benders of different types to be able to work in tandem with each other, but surely this isn't beyond the capabilities of a professional army.

This means that I have to answer the question "Did earthbenders and waterbenders fight in the Fire Nation Army?" At this current time, my position is that this was the case. I think that seeing earthbenders, and particularly waterbenders, fighting alongside firebenders would be relatively rare. But I do think there's interesting discussion to be had on these specialised units which is enough for another post.

Lack of non-benders It's never expressly stated, but it appears that the United Forces are composed entirely out of benders. I've written about Azulon's innovation of mixed bender and non-bender combat before and I think that this still applies in the era of Korra. In short, non-benders are better at killing so you want to dilute your benders with non-benders to create an efficient army.

But there is room for salvation. For whatever reason, the United Forces is quite small. Even Kuvira's army is pretty weak considering her control of the vast tracts of land in what was previously the Earth Kingdom. An explanation might be found in a post-war treaty that severely limited the size of standing armies. Azulon's main concern was army size, but if this has been arbitrarily limited then it might make sense for entire armies to be composed of benders once more.

Barbed wire The barbed wire is pathetic and also hilarious. It just doesn't make any sense at any level. What we have is three lines of "concertina wire", because barbed wire is arranged into the loops. These lengths of concertina wires are held up by "Czech hedgehog" obstacles. Not only is it only three lines, it doesn't even reach the edge of the mountain side. It doesn't make sense as to why Iroh would place all of his troops directly behind his own wire. It's true that his job was to "defend" Republic City, but this wasn't going to be some long and drawn out conflict. Both Iroh and Kuvira had limited forces, so Iroh's goal would be more accurately described as to "repel" Kuvira. And then there's the hedgehogs, which are the big spiky looking things. Using hedgehogs isn't a bad idea at all, considering it was known that Kuvira had sizable tank capacity. Unfortunately, they were going to be absolutely useless because Iroh only had thirty six of them. Tools like barbed wire and hedgehogs require a certain degree of area saturation to be effective and Iroh wasn't a tenth of the way there. All in all, there is nothing right about Iroh's use of these obstacles.

But of course, this doesn't matter because obstacles are obsolete in the world of Avatar anyway. Unless the barbed wire/hedgehog is made out of pure platinum, the wire itself can be metalbent into irrelevancy. Even if the barbed wire was platinum, then the ground upon which it sits could be earthbent. These obstacles that sit on the ground are easily removable and are therefore not obstacles. I've thought a lot about the Earth Kingdom defending against the Fire Nation, but I haven't thought a whole lot about the reverse. While the Hundred Year War was defined by the Fire Nation's slow yet unstoppable progress, surely the Earth Kingdom launched counteroffensives which drove the Fire Nation back in some areas. Add that to the future post list.

Anti-air and Anti-tank It was known that Kuvira's forces consisted of large numbers of tanks and airships, yet Iroh's preparations features no response to this threat. Considering that Iroh's defenses aren't really defenses anyway, this isn't surprising. It's not as if Iroh deployed something that's useless -- it appears he had nothing to deploy at all. I'm hoping that there wasn't a staging area filled with cannons somewhere closer to the city. In that week of preparations Iroh yielded zero anti-vehicle stuff.

Azulon was a resourceful man, and would have recognised that the ships in the harbour were merely sitting idle. In this time of great need, he'd strip the ships of all armament and use them as ground defense weapons.

Defensive fortifications Given how weak Iroh's "defenses" are, I wouldn't be surprised if, in those three hours of warning he had, he personally gave each soldier a short length of wire and then asked them to tie them all together to make the barbed wire. The General had supposedly been working on his defenses for a week, but we see nothing of this. In a single day, a thousand trained earthbenders should be able to construct a gigantic network of defenses. It might not be pretty, it might not withstand heavy bombardment, but it will be strong defensive position. Even in three hours, a thousand earthbenders could easily have created anti-tank fortifications and ditches. But all Iroh has to show for it is some concertina and a few dozen tents.

A thousand earthbenders with even a day of full work could create a gigantic, although rudimentary, defense network.

The Headquarters In some ways, we should appreciate how close the General is to the "front line". He's right there, within the possible blast effect of the spirit weapon. He'll nobly share the fate of his soldiers. But that isn't his job as general. Considering that telephones exist now, he should probably be with Reiko. A General is under no obligation to risk their own life in the line of fire -- their obligation is to minimise that risk for their own soldiers.

This difference in doctrine also existed between Sozin and Azulon. Sozin placed his emphasis on fighting alongside the soldiers because he believed that to be a demonstration of his own power. Azulon placed his emphasis on command structures and organisation. It's true that Azulon sometimes took part in a cheeky fight or two, but in general Azulon wanted his army to function with maximum effectiveness.

Defensive posture The General, in all of his brilliance, adopted a defensive posture equivalent to standing with your arms crossed and feet together. Why are the troops and barbed wire stacked like some sort of sandwich? The General has placed his troops at the point where the valley widens, which doesn't make sense at all. Let's say the barbed wire was somehow an impassable obstacle. His position invites Kuvira's tanks to crash into the flanks of his formation, while the centre remains helpless as they're bombed by the airships. Perhaps in terms of raw manpower the two antagonists are matched, but Kuvira has the clear advantage with the airships and tanks.

Waterbenders The waterbenders have no water. I repeat, the waterbenders have no water.

Thanks, Iroh. On the other hand, Azulon would have gone into overkill. In that preparatory week, he'd have the earthbenders building an artificial lake. He'd have wells built, he'd build a new river, he'd ensure that the waterbenders have a virtually endless source of that glorious H2O.

Overall strategy What the hell was the General's plan? Why did he allow Kuvira's army to march right up to them -- a move which gave Kuvira the short distance needed for maximum effectiveness of her superior tanks and mesh? Perhaps an explanation can be found in Reiko's intent to attempt an order to turn around; but you don't allow an overwhelmingly superior force to march up to the gates before asking them to turn around. You engage the enemy when they are weakest and you are strongest. The General had limited resources, it's true, but his strategy was a failure from the moment he decided to set up defenses right at the gates to Republic City. Iroh's mish mash of benders and barbed wire had no objective, there didn't seem to be any plan.

What would have been Azulon's strategy? I think the first thing he would have recognised was the importance of the mountains. This is where Azulon would have placed the majority of his defenses, but all of this would be concealed. Heavy and perhaps even theatrical fortifications would have been built further way from the city but still between the mountains. Someone like Azulon would understand Kuvira's character and foresee her arrogant demonstration of power.

With these things in mind, Azulon's strategy would be to exploit Kuvira's arrogance. She clearly thinks that the mega mech is the be all and end all of her army. She's neglected her forces in favour of her new toy. Azulon would strike these vulnerable units in a surprise flank attack with maximum intensity. If he has airships then he's dropping bombs too. What's most important is that Azulon leaves their rear unharrassed. This is the classic tactic of allowing your enemy an easy withdrawal route. Azulon's goal wouldn't be to destroy the ground forces; the goal is to separate them from the mega mech and then take down the mega mech.

Iroh's Redemption I've been trashing Iroh a lot, so I thought it'd only be fair if I provide possible explanations for what we see that don't rely on Iroh being incompetent. And that's reliant on Mako:

This doesn't make sense… There aren't any train tracks this way. How are they transporting that super weapon of hers?

This is what he says when the gang hears Kuvira's army while riding an air bison. As we've already discussed, there's no excuse for being surprised at Kuvira's actions. But if we ignore the fact of a lack of intelligence, Iroh's meager defenses might not be a surprise after all. Mako's reference to "this way" might suggest that everyone was assuming a different attack route; one that utilised some train tracks. Perhaps Iroh's week was spent building a glorious impenetrable defense along this approach route. But then he gets the call that Kuvira's stomping down an unexpected path and it takes two and half hours for him to relocate everyone. So perhaps Iroh had less than half an hour to actually organise a defense at that location. Who am I kidding, someone fire this guy.