#radio stations literally called it MODERN rock back in the day

[sick-sad-little-world]

A little reminder... this is what Chris thinks when you call Soundgarden "classic rock":

Classic rock is the Beatles, Stones, and Zeppelin. It's "Freedom Rock." It's the original Woodstock lineup.

It's NOT Soundgarden, Alice in Chains, Pearl Jam, or any other band that played Lollapalooza or appeared on 120 Minutes. That's alternative rock. "Classic alternative," if you must.

But, they're not "classic rock." Please, stop tagging them "classic rock."

And, no, I don't care that Superunknown is gonna be 30 years old next March.

[valsansretovr]

Pls any modern au tbosas headcanons including both tributes and mentors??

HELLO :3 ok so I am not the best person to ask because I am extremely attached to the book's canon era and a lot of my characterisation is based on the characters' (fictional) social and political context and how they evolve within it. may I however interest you in some. assorted thoughts? some of which may be applicable to a modern au.

Under a cut bc im shy suddenly -- imagine im hiding my face behind a book while im telling u this

I think the relationship between Lucy Gray and Barb Azure is at times. strained? they're basically sisters, so obviously they love each other and are very protective of each other BUT I can imagine that their personalities clash and that they argue and that at times very mean words are exchanged. it breaks my heart to think of Barb Azure thinking of all the stupid fights they used to have after Lucy Gray dies/disappears (sorry I kinda think she dies) and how much of a waste of time they were.

barb azure is a butch lesbian. sorry im right. she's also strong as fuck.

sejanus is a terrible driver. an actual menace on the highway. he's extremely nervous and this somehow translates into explosive bouts of road rage. he will literally start shouting insults from district 2 out the window

the only other person who can match sej's chaotic driving is Festus but for basically opposite reasons: he doesn't give a shit. Festus can be found Tokyo drifting across the capitol while simultaneously trying to smoke a cigarette.

sej takes apart a toastie machine one day and hacks into the capitol airwaves so he can start his own pirate radio station where he plays rock and roll (or the capitol equivalent I guess) records. one day he almost gets busted bc his mum calls him for dinner while he's recording.

Arachne does contemporary dance.

Tigris has some sort of obsessive compulsive disorder. Maybe she even has pica? (a complication from anemia that will make sufferers crave and compulsively consume items with little to no nutritional value. raw meat wouldn't fit into that category which is why im still thinking)

also while im talking abt tigris here are some more unrelated thoughts

she's very very tall as we all know (very cool of her) and there was a mean rime about her that used to go around the academy. she has pretty bad back pain from being hunched over her sewing machine all day and bc nothing is designed for someone as tall as her.

she's also very very funny and goofy. this is crucial to me.

[flhoarder]

Calling you JV the way you say 'don't make me seem like a Lana fan' and then give him *Fishtail* instead of a more popular one <3

(which if anything in this hypothetical modern day billboard 100 AU is possibly even more incriminating than him doing Young and Beautiful or something he can just blame as a random earworm from the radio because they kept playing it)

Also potentially cursed version of that ask, new karaoke place, but they (if you want to do the rest of 41st as well go ahead) only have the top 10 pop singles from like 2000s onwards. What songs are they singing (or forcing themselves to sing). Who demostrates their Lady Gaga knowledge, pulls out some quickly forgotten 2005 hit, or reveals apparently the only popular songs they know are Gangnam style and Pineapple pen of all things ect.

NONO I CAN EXPLAIN

...Okay, Norman and Ocean Blvd are pretty cool. And possibly Chemtrail. Possibly. And Lust for Life. IM NOT A FAN

-

Aha it is cursed and I like this a lot, upon first glance it's embarrassing how many of these songs I can still sing along to

...Alright then, 41 C wing (supposedly and mostly, anyway) karaoke. A handful of people agreed to go. Pryce is paying. They left the station all at the same time but somehow some of them are still late.

Sorted by the order of their arrival time:

McCoy: First one to arrive because he has discipline and he makes his partner do a song with him. Threatens to do WAP but no one is surprised by the choice of song coming from fuckboy McCoy, which discourages him. He ends up doing Circus by Britney Spears and Starboy by The Weekend instead. One is a feel-good confidence boost for him, the other is just straight up truth. He is a motherfucking starboy with the highest body count in the whole building. Competition? He don't pay attention.

Vicquemare: Doesn't want to come but knows Harry's going to be here so he's here too. Annoyed that McCoy's on time but Harry isn't, even more annoyed to see McCoy doing a song with his partner. Goes on to get out a few dry lines from Show me the meaning of being lonely in the name of soundcheck before the second group come in. He's got the right vibes for the song, but he waits until Harry gets here and goes on to do Without me by Halsy, the entire time not breaking eye contact with Harry. It’s probably the most downbeat and grim version of the song anyone has ever done in history. He also doesn't hit half of the notes even after dropping 5 octaves from the original vocal but its the message that counts. The only people who don't find this unnerving are Harry and Ptolemy Pryce. Actually it’s so uncomfortable that no one even brings up the question as to how he even knows about the song, they are just happy to see him pass the mic.

Minot: Arrives with Jean. She's not against coming here but it's not one of her top 3 places to be. Thinks its a good idea to get the song out before the second group show up. Puts out a few solid lines from Formation by Beyonce before calling it good. Jean is the only one who's not surprised by how much she rocks the song and how well it works with her voice. She slays.

Kitsuragi: That's right, he's here because Harry literally called up 57 every other day for a whole week just to ask him to come. He finally caved on the 7th day and said yes to that. Does Maps by Maroon 5 and before anyone is shocked, he explains that he doesn't dedicate songs but if he had to this would be dedicated to his partner. Jean rocks back in his seat when he hears that but an insider tells him just in time that Kim is referring to his previous partner at 57. Kim drops 3 octaves from the original vocal and manages to make the song sound mournful with a hint of wistful longing. There's not a dry eye in the audience when he's done, and he knows it. (RIP, Eyes. You are missed.)

Pidieu (Jules:) Was planning on doing This I promise you by NSYNC because he's heard it way too much when he used to drive Apricot to school. Last minute changes to I want it that way by Backstreet boys, a song he's also heard way too much during that time. The reason for the change is because Apricot told him that young people nowadays actually still liked that song. Turns out she’s right and the song becomes a group effort as soon as Jules hits the *my fire* line.

Pidieu (Apricot:) New Rules by Dua Lipa, some of the boys are curious as to why she cuts into this song like nobody's business, a brave one almost jokingly requests Hips don't lie, but one look from her shuts them all up. Not everyone can handle Pryce's business like she does, and it certainly shows.

Torson: Alejandro by Lady Gaga. He says he's doing it for a joke and makes a really bad attempt at the accent, but after passing the first two lines he gets really serious about it, at the end it almost makes him choke up. He actually really likes the song, it makes him feel some kinda way. He's not afraid to admit it, there are two women that no one can make fun of in front of Mack Torson, one of them is his mum, the other one is Lady Gaga.

McLaine: Super Bass by Nicki Minaj. Somebody tell them who the fuck he IS. Its a good attempt and he gets Mack to join in on the chorus to give the song a boost. A for effort and the energy is off the fucking roof, even though he doesn't hit many notes.

Heidelstam: Is late because he had to drop Mikael off home and make dinner first. Gets on the stage and whips out Positions by Ariana Grande. He heard this song on the radio and liked the tune, played it a lot on his commute even though he couldn't make out most of the words in the song except something about kitchen and bedroom which he felt spoke to the depth of his soul. After a while he finally looked the lyrics up, it didn't change his opinion, but he doesn't play it when Mikael is in the car anymore. Anyway, he kills the song, even though there's mumbling in between where it gets a bit more explicit. Gotta appreciate a dad's attempt, though. He also benefits from having a relatively higher pitch in his voice comparing to the rest of 41.

Du Bois: When Harry gets here he's already got a bottle of red down. Crawls up the stage to sing Perfect by Ed Sheeran, dedicating the song to EVERYONE in the audience. Jean is very snarky about it but becomes visibly less annoyed after Harry mentions his name on the list of people he likes during his drunk chat on the mic. Kim doesn't comment on it, but he thinks Harry does the song solid.

Gottlieb: Shows up close to the end, off his face drunk. Chooses Swimming Pools (Drank) by Kendrick Lamar to sing. Even at his drunkest he knows his voice and knows exactly how to use it. For most people it's a tough song to do, and not many can get the song exactly right, but he does. It's not like he's going to remember this tomorrow morning, but he woos the crowd tonight.

Pryce: Oh yes. Did you think he was going to miss out on this? Sadly he has to go because Captain duties. The song he put in the queue earlier on was We R who we R by Kesha. It's not clear whether he intended to sing or just queueing it up for when the timer ran out. Don't ask.

[disco-cola]

honestly it just makes me feel even more misunderstood and lonelier that whenever i do a diary like entry rant talking about my era struggle and not feeling so happy in this decade that someone says something like you can still have that life - how? i forcibly see modern houses and cars everyday. people dressed in modern clothes or 70s style clothing being back in style but then not being able to tell actual classic rock people from people just digging the pure style without further passion for that time its from - no offense no critique intended here just makes it a lil harder when u get excited about a potential new friend and theyre like "i dont like """OLD""" music - and people always on phones. like always. you meet up with people but theyre on their phones. people driving and looking down while being in active part of traffic. you get on a train and almost everyone is staring down at a screen. someone almost running you over bc they just cant even look up while walking. people filming fucking everything to post it on social media in hopes to go viral just for one day. the whole toxicity behind social media but it being so present its hard to find a way around it - even typing this im just as guilty of that but i havent managed to ditch all of it yet because sometimes i need to just put thoughts out there. but even if i decorate my whole apartment authentically 70s and buy a car that is now labeled as "oldtimer" and not affordable to drive everyday or keep in shape for most working class normal formal people - it just is not the same now as it was then. i want everyone around me to decorate their places like that. i want wood panelling and flower tiles and shag carpeting being the latest craze in home trends. i wanna sit in traffic full of colorful pretty cars. i wanna get called on my rotary dial landline or scrape up some coins for a phone booth. i want to hear an amazing guitar solo in almost every song no matter what radio station i turn on. no auto-tune, just talent. i wanna go to a store and buy vibrant dresses and boots and vests. i want to see men in bell bottoms and platform boots. girls too. i want all my friends to dress like that. i want us to sit together and read the latest issue of creem magazine. i wanna turn on my big ass tv set to top of the pops and see my favorite bands play as their young selves and know they are out there right now. i wanna go to their shows and see them live. its just not the same now anymore. an imitation will never be an original.

and i seriously wish i was "normal" in a sense that i would just have no desire to teleport back to another decade and not even lose a single thought about it and just enjoy whats popular on streaming sites and young artists music and social media and just go with trends and identify with recent mainstream taste bc it would make everything easier, and i tried, but i just cant do it. i literally cant. it makes me feel so uneasy and bad i wanna cry. like on a random day in late 2k13 classic rock (or basically any genre from the 60s-80s tbh i like everything from pop to rock to punk to reggae to disco whatever as long as its from that era tbh) including that era struggle just took over my life and has had me in a grip ever since, i really didnt choose to like it that much and nothing else, i just cant help it like why me???

[piratewithvigor]

My first thought in regard to every band that gets played on my radio station

ACDC: Every dad’s favourite band

Adams, Bryan: Every mom’s favourite singer until Michael Buble came along

Aerosmith: haha they thought Vince Neil was a lady

Alice Cooper: he’s a Game Of Thrones fanboy and I have proof

Alice In Chains: my sister doesn’t like them because she decided AC were Alice Cooper’s initials ONLY

Allman Brothers Band: good music for dropping acid to

Allman, Gregg: That’s too many Gs for one name

Animals: House Of The Rising Sun, or who even cares

Argent: Sometimes Hold Your Head Up is really catchy

Asia: Tuesdays

Autograph: one of the members went on to be a pharmacist

Bachman-Turner Overdrive: There are just so many pop culture jokes about Taking Care Of Business that whatever I say won’t be as funny

Bad Company: with their song; Bad Company, off their album; Bad Company

Benatar, Pat: Always getting her confused with Patti Smith

Black Crowes: I like them for Lickin, but it doesn’t seem to exist outside of one shoddy video on youtube and my old CD

Blackfoot: this band name feels kind of racy

Black Sabbath: Dio was not better or worse than Ozzy; just different

Blondie: I like Call Me, but Blondie confuses me stylistically

Blue Oyster Cult: MORE COWBELL

Bon Jovi: Hello, childhood trauma, I missed you

Boston: ONE GUY. ONE GUY DID IT ALL AND NO ONE KNOWS

Bowie, David: Don’t let your children watch The Man Who Fell To Earth, or David Bowie’s will end up being the third penis they see in life

Browne, Jackson: Another musician ruined by Supernatural

Buffalo Springfield: Jack Nicholson was at the riot they sing about

Burdon, Eric: no ideas, brain empty

Bush: ditto

Candlebox: ditto once more. Who are these people?

Cars: This band feels so gay and so straight at the same time, I can only assume they’re the poster children of bisexual panic

Cheap Trick: I played Dream Police on Guitar Hero so fucking much because it was the only song anyone who played with me could keep up with

Chicago: Chicago 30 exists, but they do not have 30 albums. Fucking riddle me that

Clapton, Eric: 6 discs in one Greatest Hits is too many. That’s called “re releasing your discography”

Cochrane, Tom: For some reason, everyone thinks Rascal Flats did it better

Cocker, Joe: Belushi did it right

Collective Soul: who?

Collins, Phil: If his biggest hits were done by MCR, they would be emo anthems, but because he’s 5′6″ and from the 80s, they’re not

Cream: *Vietnam flashbacks on the hippie side*

CCR: *Vietnam flashbacks on the war side*

CSNY: David Crosby; meh

Deep Purple: THEY’RE SO MUCH MORE THAN SMOKE ON THE WATER

Def Leppard: the only music for when you’re a heartbroken bitch but also a sexy one

Derek And The Dominos: Clapton and ‘Layla’ broke up

Derringer, Rick: Tom Petty if he was from the midwest

Dio: You thought it was an anime reference, but it was me, Dio

Dire Straits: You can tell how bigoted a radio station is based on how much of Money For Nothing they censor

Doobie Brothers: I have yet to smoke weed, but I listen to the Doobies, and I think that’s pretty close

Dylan, Bob: I take back everything I said about him in my youth

Eagles: Hotel California isn’t their best song, but the memes that come from it are second to none

Edgar Winter Group: @the--blackdahlia

Electric Light Orchestra: Actually an orchestra and sound a fuckton like George Harrison

ELO: I really hesitate to ask what happens with the 7 virgins and a mule

Essex, David: no prominent memories of him

Fabulous Thunderbirds: cannot spell

Faces: Who on earth thought that was a good album name?

Faith No More: I got nothing

Fixx: One Thing Leads To Another is a damn bop

Fleetwood Mac: I ain’t straight, but I’m simply not enough of a witch to enjoy them to full potential

Fogerty, John: He got sued cause he sounded like himself

Foghat: Slow Ride slowly becoming less coherent feels like a drug trip

Foo Fighters: He was just excited to buy a grill

Ford, Lita: deserved better

Foreigner: dramatically overplayed

Frampton, Peter: a masterful user of the talk box

Free: dramatically underplayed

Gabriel, Peter: leaving Genesis changed him a lot

Genesis: if someone likes Genesis, clarify the era, because yes, it does matter

Georgia Satellites: sing like you have a cactus in your ass

Golden Earring: Twilight Zone slaps, but it doesn’t slap as hard as this station thinks it does

Grand Funk Railroad: Funk

Grateful Dead: I like their aesthetic more than their music

Great White: there are so many fucking shark jokes

Greenbaum, Norman: makes me think of Subway for some reason

Green Day: the first of the emo revolution

Greg Kihn Band: RocKihnRoll is literally the most clever album name I’ve ever seen

Guns N Roses: They have more than three good songs, but radio stations never recognize that

Hagar, Sammy: I’m still trying to figure out where he lived to take 16 hours to get to LA driving 55 and how fucking fast was he driving beforehand?

Harrison, George: He went from religious to rock, and if he had continued rocking, he would have gotten too cool 

Head East: I respect people who use breakfast foods as album names

Heart: Magic Man and Barracuda are played at least once every goddamn day. They’re not even the best songs!

Hendrix, Jimi: I have both a cousin and a sibling named after Hendrix references

Henley, Don: Dirty Laundry gives me too much inspiration

Hollies: Somehow sound like they’re both from the 60s and the 80s at the same time

Idol, Billy: he’s doing well for himself

INXS: Terminator vibes

Iris, Donnie: knockoff Roy Orbison

James Gang: too many funks

Jane’s Addiction: if TMNT had a grunge band representative

Jefferson Airplane: *assorted cheers*

Jefferson Starship: *assorted boos*

Jethro Tull: The only band to make you feel not cool enough to play the flute

Jett, Joan: icon

J. Geils Band: I requested them on the radio once and it got played

Joel, Billy: he really did just air everybody’s business like that

John Cafferty And The Beaver Brown Band: literally wtf is that name

John, Elton: yarn Elton sits in my basement, unstaring. Please someone take him from me

Joplin, Janis: Queen

Journey: Stop overplaying Don’t Stop Believing. It takes away from the rest of the repetoire

Judas Priest: literally started the gay leather aesthetic

Kansas: another fucking band Supernatural stole

Kenny Wayne Shepherd: the man confuses me to the point where he isn’t in the right place alphabetically

Kiss: Mick Mars and I will simply have to disagree on the subject

Kravitz, Lenny: runaway vibes

Led Zeppelin: Fucking fight me if you don’t think they’re the most talented band (maybe not the most talented individually, but collectively, no one comes close)

Lennon, John: My least favourite Beatle for reasons

Live: I got nothin

Living Colour: slap a decent amount

Loverboy: do you not get TURNT the fuck up to the big Loverboy hits? Who hurt you??

Lynyrd Skynyrd: Sweet Home Alabama is a Neil Young diss track

Marshall Tucker Band: no opinion

Manfred Mann’s Earth Band: VERY STRONG OPINIONS THAT THEY AREN’T GOOD

McCartney, Paul/Wings: Power couple

Meatloaf: I have nothing but respect for a man who willingly named himself Meatloaf

Mellencamp, John: voted cutest lesbian of 1987

Metallica: I liked their appearance on Jimmy Fallon

Midnight Oil: I get them confused for Talking Heads a lot

Modern English: who?

Molly Hatchet: Hollies vibes, but also Georgia Satellites vibes

Money, Eddie: DAN AVIDAN, IF YOU SEE THIS, COVER TAKE ME HOME TONIGHT

Motley Crue: Stan Mick Mars and John Corabi. They’re the only ones who deserve it

Mott The Hoople: no one loves them except for David Bowie

Mountain: props for naming an album ‘Climbing’

Nazareth: I want to make a John Mulaney joke here, but I can never come up with one

Nicks, Stevie: witch queen

Night Ranger: I get them confused with Urge Overkill

Nirvana: Kurt Cobain was the ally grunge needed

Nova, Aldo: he’s Canadian, at least

Nugent, Ted: *serves a ghost as jerky*

Offspring: nothing here

Osbourne, Ozzy: this bitch crazy

Outfield: Your Love is kind of a sketchy song, but it slaps hard

Palmer, Robert: low quality Eddie Money

Pearl Jam: *grunts in Eddie Vedder*

Petty, Tom: I have so many feelings about Tom Petty and they are all good

Pink Floyd: which one is Pink?

Plant, Robert: solo career is a crapshoot, but his voice is unparalleled

Poison: I want them to write a song called ‘Alice Cooper’

Pretenders: I want to say good things, but I have nothing to say

Queen: A doctor of astrophysics, a screaming girl, a disco queen and a diva walk into a bar. It’s Queen; they’re there to play a gig

Queensryche: neutral opinion

Quiet Riot: they got big because of a song they hated. I love that

Rafferty, Gerry: the second-sexiest sax opening in all of music

Rainbow: Ritchie Blackmore created something very magnificent

Ram Jam: one good song and they didn’t even write it

Ratt: I’m sure they have more than Round And Round, but I don’t know it

RHCP: funky, but if you have paid money to hear them, you’re going to The Bad Place (I don’t make the rules)

Red Rider: basically Golden Earring

Reed, Lou: Walk On The Wild Side would be such a cool song if it wasn’t so dull

REM: American Tragically Hip

REO Speedwagon: Props for having a dad joke as an album title

Rolling Stones: Never in my life could I imagine the drummer being named anything but Charlie

Rush: How to make being uncool the coolest fucking shit

Santana: The world needs more Santana

Scandal: There’s something really funny about The Warrior being my brother’s “song” with his girlfriend

Scorpions: Was Wind Of Change written by the CIA? Only the spotify podcast I got an ad for once could say

Seger, Bob: A different variety of Eric Clapton (frankly a better variety, but that’s just me)

Simple Minds: we ALL forgot about you

Skid Row: Sebastian Bach is prettier than all of us

Soundgarden: music that makes you feel like you dunked your head underwater

Springsteen, Bruce: my arch-nemesis. Maybe someday, he’ll find out about it

Squeeze: according to my friends, the stupidest band name ever, but they’re theatre kids, so you know

Squier, Billy: If he can make it through 1984 alive, you can make it through whatever bad day you’re having

Stealers Wheel: Yet another band who I always mistake for George Harrison

Steely Dan: my house’s nickname for the Robber in Settlers Of Catan

Steppenwolf: Either makes me think of Jay & Silent Bob, Jack Nicholson, or that time I had to cut 6lbs of onions

Steve Miller Band: when you’re in the right mood, they slap hard

Stewart, Rod: my soundtrack to summer 2015

Stills, Stephen: Love The One You’re With Is Catchy, but the lyrics are questionable

Stone Temple Pilots: the only band to write a song about goo you smear on yourself

Stray Cats: an obscene amount of merch is available for them

Styx: Supernatural would have ruined them for me too if I hadn’t been into them previously. 

Supertramp: I hunted for Breakfast In America for two years and it was worth every hunt

Sweet: I will never understand my two-month obsession with Ballroom Blitz when I was 15, but it was legit all I listened to

Talking Heads: you may find yourself in a pizza hut. And you may find yourself in a taco bell. And you may find yourself at the combination pizza hut and taco bell. And you may ask yourself; ‘how did I get here?’

Temple Of The Dog: I keep confusing them for Nazareth

Ten Years After: somehow still relevant

Tesla: not the car or the dude

The Beatles: Evokes a lot of opinions from people. Mine is that I love them

The Clash: I showed my sister the ‘Lock The Taskbar’ vine ONCE and it still kills her

The Doors: evokes teenage terror from deep within my soul

The Guess Who: Canada’s answer to confusing question-themed band names

The Kinks: kinky

The Police: wrote the theme of 2020 and everyone somehow forgot it was about a teacher resisting becoming a pedophile

The Ramones: playing all of their songs in a row wouldn’t take more than 2 hours

The Romantics: you don’t think you know them, but if you’ve seen Shrek 2, you have

The Who: If someone can explain Tommy to me, I’d be glad to hear it

The Zombies: I think they happened because of the 60s

Thin Lizzy: Could the boys maybe leave town?

Thorogood, George: blues, but make it modern

Toto: the most memed song behind All Star

Townshend, Pete: just makes me think of the end of Mr. Deeds

T-Rex: Mark Bolan is an icon

Triumph: The no-name brand of Rush

Tubes: like the yogurt

Twisted Sister: they did a christmas album and my mom does NOT hate it

U2: U2 Movers; we move in mysterious ways

Van Halen: RIP Eddie

Van Morrison: honestly, who’s named Van?

Vaughn, Stevie Ray: Steamy Ray Vaughn

Walsh, Joe: The Smoker You Drink The Player You Get

War: Foghat, but even groovier

Whitesnake: the most successful band to be named after a penis

Wright, Gary: the 90s thanks him for writing the song every movie used for the “guy sees cute girl and it’s love at first sight” scene

Yes: To Be Continued

Young, Neil: The best part of CSNY

Zevon, Warren: the album cover of Excitable Boy makes me deeply uncomfortable for reasons I don’t understand

ZZ Top: has been the same three guys since 1969. Lineup unchanged. 

3 Doors Down: They feel a little modern to be on a classic rock station, but whatever

38 Special: Why 38?

[laceymorganwrites]

On with the show

Word count: 2, 181

Pairing: Nikki Sixx!Kuroo x reader

Warnings: mentions of drug abuse, swearing, mentions of cheating and overall asshole behavior, description of childhood abuse, description of a disgusting apartment, mentions of sex

Taglist: @varia-venus 

General taglist: @astrooliver

Tetsuro knew what he wanted. And he´d get it. No matter what.

He had been desperately trying to make it in the metal scene of Tokyo but to no avail. Rock n roll was dead, hard rock and anything remotely close to metal even more so.

It was unfair and he felt like a ghost. Tetsuro wanted to be seen. He wanted the acknowledgment of others to replace the void in his heart that came from the neglect in his childhood.

Well, it was more than just neglect, but he was way too sober to dive into that right now.

Growing up when pop and safe lyrics poisoned the radio stations and he wanted to rip out his hearing organs every fucking time, he felt like an outsider.

Maybe he was born into the wrong time. It was so unfair to him.

Nowadays everyone could do and be whatever they wanted, so everyone told him.

But in reality, nobody wanted heavy riffs, smashing drums or high pitched screams. Nobody cared about rock n roll anymore, it was dead. Sure modern artists tried and failed to revive it, but whatever shitty music they made, it was a fucking sin to compare it to rock.

Heavy didn´t mean autotune, heavy didn´t mean lyrics being written by twelve different people, heavy didn´t mean censored.

Everyone preferred staged and picture perfect boy groups, it made Tetsuro sick to his stomach. They could all suck it. He hated fake people so much, it made him rage.

Without any friends of his age, he snaked his way through various bands and played gigs in almost every club in Tokyo.

Tetsuro was a loner, a loser with an ego way out of perspective. He didn´t care that he couldn´t play bass, he did anyway. He wanted to be like his idols, wanted to be the savior of heavy music.

But all he was, was a little kid with too much free time.

Other kids his age would go to college at this point, not Tetsuro though.

He moved out of his dad´s place as soon as possible, his mom having divorced him back when he was in middle school, leaving him with scars and a broken home.

His dad was an asshole, emotionally manipulating and abusing him. Like any abuser, it wasn´t always bad. There were good times, he took him to all the concerts he wanted to go to. He didn´t yell at him when he found weed in his bag.

Instead he brought home so many women, Tetsuro couldn´t even remember their faces, let alone their names. Every day he was told what a slob and disappointment he was, why he had to make the life of his dad so hard, that it was no wonder his mom left.

Like a fucking idiot he went looking for her, only to be left with nothing but a broken heart.

So, he tried everything to gain the approval that he never got in his childhood from bad influences.

He quit school, worked his ass off to get a guitar and then auditioned for whatever band needed someone right now.

For about thirty minutes to an hour, he felt like someone important, like the rockstar he always wanted to be.

He felt invincible.

Still, no band ever stuck with him, they just kicked him out every time they found out he either fucked their sister or girlfriend, had consumed all of their alcohol and drugs or stole their money.

Tetsuro met Koutaro in a diner after he broke up with his most recent band.

Koutaro was a drummer for his own band at the time and fuck did he fit the job description.

His energy was off the charts and they hit it off instantly, soon their legacy as the terror twins was born.

And fuck did they own that name.

Tetsuro had plans, he wanted to be at the top of the rock n roll scene, wanted to have the band that everyone talked about, the band that sold out clubs every night.

And he´d have it.

He´d have it at the cost of losing everything.

They found Keishin through an ad online.

He was older than them, but very promising. ´Loud, rude, aggressive guitarist´, if that didn´t sound absolutely perfect.

Now, all they needed was a singer.

Yuuji didn´t have the ambitions that Tetsuro had, he was in a band to get laid.

He could sing good enough, but never went past the point of singing for a shitty cover band, why should he make an effort anyway?

Every night he could get all the girls he wanted and they were hanging on his every word.

He felt like a god.

At first he didn´t want to audition for the band, they were all losers who looked the part, fucking weirdos in platform boots, high heels and make up, not to mention the gruesome hair.

But then again, Koutaro did let him sleep in his van when Yuuji was kicked out by his parents…

The least he could do was go to one of their jam sessions.

He took his girlfriend at the time with him because she had a car and would drive him everywhere.

Yuuji didn´t earn much, the band was his only income, making him just one of many starving artists.

He wasn´t with her because he loved her and she knew it, she wasn´t either.

She was with him for the sex and the fame, he was with her cause she had money and would buy him things, mostly clothes.

When he arrived he was met with a bunch of losers and regretted everything.

The apartment was small, barely fitting all the instruments.

Tetsuro greeted Yuuji when he arrived, eyeing his girlfriend in an annoyed way, he hated entitled girls like her.

Everything about her screamed: ´I´m better than you´ and she didn´t hesitate to tell them that Yuuji only deserved the best band and that they sucked.

Most of the guys ignored that, Koutaro being too busy greeting Yuuji very loudly and bathing in nostalgia.

Keishin was tuning his guitar, not really paying attention. He told them beforehand that he was in it for the long haul and that he´d leave immediately if they weren´t up to his standards.

Yuuji´s girlfriend sat down on their dirty couch, eyeing them with a critical eye and crossing her arms.

As soon as the first note hit, it felt like magic.

Tetsuro couldn´t describe it in any other way, it was overwhelming and he felt a sense of euphoria, a distant feeling of happiness he never knew.

Everything fell into place, it just felt right.

It wasn´t long before their legacy was born, before Tokyo either hated or loved them.

And the band liked their haters more.

Yuuji and Koutaro moved in with Tetsuro in his tiny apartment, barely spacious enough to house only one person, let alone three.

But they didn´t have money, it was the only way.

Their place was a mess and soon to be the place to be when it came to parties.

Of course the noise complaints kept coming, as did the bills, but they never paid.

The apartment was infested with bugs and cockroaches, Koutaro made it a habit to burn them with hairspray and a lighter.

The fridge didn´t work, neither did the warm water. In fact hardly anything worked the way it should.

Their bathroom was a mess, as was their kitchen and living room.

The boys were too lazy to clean, not that they knew how to, or had the money to buy the utensils.

It was horrible.

When Tetsuro thought back on those times, a shudder overcame him.

How were they manage to survive those circumstances?

Drugs really did wonders…

He remembered not possessing a trash can and just throwing the trash out of the window in their backyard where it would eventually pile up and earn them more complaints.

Hell, their neighbors thought someone died there.

Fuck, they were such idiots and that wasn´t even the worst part.

The ´band house´ as they lovely called it even though it was really just an apartment that was way too small and dirty beyond anything, soon became the place to be when it was about parties.

All of it was so ironic.

They did absolutely everything to be cool, accepted and in the scene.

Including but by far not limited to: hosting parties with about 50 people in an apartment meant for one, Tetsuro setting his leather jacket on fire to prove how cool and edgy he was, Yuuji fucking literally everyone´s girlfriend and Koutaro making a girl squirt all over a fruit bowl that just appeared mysteriously some day.

They were a gang. A gang of fucking idiots.

And they were proud of it too…

Proud of fucking everything that they shouldn´t, then sticking their dicks in burritos to hide the smell of another woman from their girlfriends, proud of cheating and lying and being loud and rude and obnoxious.

They felt like the absolute kings, like the peak of the scene when icons were sniffing cocaine on their couch.

Idols they looked up to.

Idols that would hate them eventually.

Now that he had you in his arms it all felt so surreal to Tetsuro.

Everything that he did, it felt so… unfair in some way.

He didn´t deserve you, he pushed you away so many times after all, but you always stayed. You were persistent and stubborn.

Tetsuro was convinced you were the best thing in his life.

Fuck the band, fuck the fame, fuck the money, the fake friends, the drugs especially.

All he needed was you.

He couldn´t even remember how you two met, it was all a blur.

Were you a groupie in the beginning? He didn´t know.

What he did know is that you were always there, like some sort of angel.

Maybe you were.

Perhaps you were sent from heaven, or more likely hell, to escort him there.

Whatever it was, he was glad you were there.

If you weren´t, he´d be dead by now.

Actually, even with you, he should be dead.

Thinking back on his youth, he always felt sick to his core, they were such a bunch of idiotic losers.

What they did to the girls was unforgivable, hell, who the fuck had a routine when it came to fucking girls that were in a relationship?

They did.

They only had one bed in the apartment and they took turns, when they were done with one girl, another came through the window, already undressing.

And the worst thing was that they were proud of it, they felt like kings.

After all they recorded an album in four days, renting the cheapest studio they could find with money they stole.

It was a mess, but it was fun at the time.

That was before everything went to shit.

And it was already on the verge back then.

Tetsuro always wondered why you were even with him.

You knew damn well that he was never home, always touring and doing fuck knows what there.

Of course it wasn´t that bad anymore, but before you made things official, he was the biggest asshole one could imagine.

Even after you got together, he still was.

And still you stayed with him.

Did you simply feel responsible for him or was there something more? Did you stay because you always believed in the good in him?

It was a silly thought and yet it was all he had, all he wanted to believe himself.

Thinking that you thought there was good in him left made him feel better about himself.

Were you an angel on his shoulder or a distant dream?

A vision from his drugged up days that was so persistent it stayed throughout everything.

Tetsuro learned that thinking too much never led to good things, it mostly led to more self doubts.

However if he didn´t think about it, he thought he could never show his gratitude the right way.

After everything you´ve been through, after everything you fixed in him, he didn´t want to imagine a life without you.

You surpassed being a mere human, you were his savior, you were the one who called the ambulance all those years ago, the one he saw when he woke up and the one he saw after the second OD.

For him you were always there and he never questioned it, to be fair, he didn´t care about anything in his youth, it was all temporary to him.

Anything that wasn´t scared him, though he couldn´t help but be the edgy fuck that chased those fears, facing and fighting them. Though he´d much rather kiss you.

A faint smile painted his lips as he pulled you closer to him, doing just that, a satisfied hum leaving his lips.

Life like this was nice.

Life without drugs, without toxic people in it, a quiet life he never knew he always wanted.

Life with a love he never thought he deserved.

[mappingthemoon]

@gowns tagged me for the 4 albums from the year you turned 14 meme:

What I actually listened to when I was 14 (aside from Ziggy-era David Bowie, obsessively):

Fastball: All the Pain Money Can Buy -- I didn't have this album but ofc taped their one-hit wonder “The Way” off the radio, and I genuinely do still love that song! I included Fastball on this list bc they were the very first concert I ever attended. Fastball and Marcy Playground opened for Everclear, but tbh I was only there for Marcy Playground (ugh, this premillennium tension aesthetique!). I wore my Johnny the Homicidal Maniac t-shirt to the show so other people there would know I was still COOL even though my mom was with me. At one point a mosh pit started nearby and my poor mom got kicked in the head outta nowhere... I still remember the visceral, torturous sense of longing I felt as she dragged me away from the crowd, completely pissed off. I just wanted to throw myself into the chaos and dance -- this was a REAL LIFE EXPERIENCE!!!, y’know? Mom found a plastic lawn chair and sat out the rest of the night, while I was allowed to go close to the crowd but not too far that she couldn’t see me. Man, I was butthurt about this show for ages and thinking back now as an adult, it’s like... actually pretty cool that she still chose to stay and let me see the rest of the show. Maybe she could tell how excited I was, how important it was for me to see these bands. Or maybe it was because Ticketbastard was nonrefundable, lol. Ooh, another side note: I've always photographed concerts, long before I decided to concentrate on being a “concert photographer,” and it’s funny in Today’s Modern World to remember the lengths I went to sneak cameras into different venues: hiding a point-n-shoot inside a bag of maxi pads in my bookbag, for example, or duct-taping a disposable camera to my upper inner thigh (where security didn’t touch during a pat-down, and which could be easily concealed within a JNCO jean pant). I think I still have some real shitty disposable camera pics of this show, taken from my vantage point a million miles away from the stage.

Marilyn Manson: Mechanical Animals -- I got into MM within a year or so of discovering Bowie. In fact, it was one of my Bowie internet penpals who first mailed me tape copies of her Manson CDs, Antichrist Superstar and Portrait of an American Family. I didn’t have headphones so I used to play the tapes on my little boombox with the volume turned way low and my ear pressed against the speaker. My parents weren’t necessarily shocked by the ~satanic~ imagery, but they wouldn’t’ve been happy about all the swearing (I have four younger siblings). At one point my dad made some comment about Marilyn Manson not being a big deal bc he’s just “a good businessman” who is only doing shock-rock; he wouldn’t do anything that wasn’t marketable. And of course I was outraged, like, YOU DON’T UNDERSTAAAAAND, he is an ARTIST!!! Shoulda listened to Dad; I might not’ve gotten so bent about the commodification of literally every subculture if I’d only paid better attention.

Orgy: Candyass -- The other day I heard WAP on the radio and I was like, lol, I’d hate to be the parent of a teenager today and have to deal with this song; but yes it was way cool/forbidden and edgy/awkward to tell my parents I was going to see a band called ORGY. They were my fave of all the nu-metal happening in the late ‘90s/early ‘00s. The alternative rock radio station used to host these $5 concerts and I wound up seeing a bunch of nu-metal bands just before they made it big (like Linkin Park, Crazy Town, the Union Underground). I wasn’t really a fan of any of these groups beyond their hit singles, but I craved the ROCK CONCERT experience of just being in a smoke-filled spooky club hangout with a few hundred sweaty strangers screaming, shoving, groping, kicking the shit out of each other... I didn’t really give a fuck what band was playing, I just wanted to BREAK STUFF

Placebo: Without You I'm Nothing -- This might have been the first album I bought with my own money. I got my first kiss from a boy in the mall parking lot, walking back to the trolley stop after buying this record (and shoplifting from Hot Topic, causing general havoc in the food court, etc.). The album as a whole turned out to be not as good as its first single, “Pure Morning,” but I still own the CD as a memento of that day.

Runner-up - Neutral Milk Hotel: In the Aeroplane Over the Sea -- I don't think I actually heard this record until 2001, because one of my high school bffs was a fan. She’s a year older than me and so back then, I felt like her musical taste was very mature and intellectual, almost aspirational -- not necessarily that I wanted to like all the same things she liked, but I admired that she had such varied eclectic tastes and this was a lil nudge of inspiration for me to consciously decide to give different artists a try beyond the first listen. It took a while for NMH to grow on me, tho -- the first time I heard them, I thought it was some boring whiny emo bullshit, and I didn’t revisit them much until I had actually been living in Athens a few years and had a roommate who had moved here because of Elephant 6 (I had absolutely zero knowledge of Athens’ place in music history prior to living here).

What I listen to now that came out in 1998 while I was too busy headbanging to pay attention:

Air: Moon Safari Massive Attack: Mezzanine Morcheeba: Big Calm The Orb: U.F.Off

I’m p sure my first listen for all of these records was 2004. This seems to be the year I return to the most when it comes to getting stuck on nostalgia. I listen to a lot of different stuff and I still pay attention to current music, but what I listened to when I was 20 is like the comfort food of my music collection. That year, I was having an obsession with all things electronica, which was likely triggered by the inclusion of Morcheeba’s “The Sea” on a mix given to me by a boy I had a massive crush on. I have often referred to that time as my best year, that age as my best self -- fire-apple red hair, a DIY darkroom in the basement, staying up all night in manic frenzies of zine-making with my very best love, drinking and fucking and having the occasional mostly-responsible hallucinogenic experience, working two jobs but naively vaguely hopeful that someday somehow maybe I wouldn’t have to be working two jobs to make ends meet (LOL), travelling alone to new cities on the greyhound to meet people from the internet, making crazy plans to throw everything away and move to New Orleans (almost made it...). I mean, it’s who I was before the big trauma, basically. I’m always desperately curious to know what would’ve become of that girl had she not gotten totally derailed at what seemed to be the zenith of adolescent experience. Anyway, tl;dr chillout is just easy listening for millennials, change my mind. I’ll tag @an-inconvenient-dandelion, @hthrloooo, @madmoths, @oo0ooo, & anyone else!

[grimelords]

There is no limit to how many good songs exist! There are just so many!

My June playlist is finished, and on time too! Please enjoy all manner of bangers from Dave Brubeck, Nelly Furtado and everyone in between.

listen here

Night And Day - Hot Chip: I’ve started a band with some friends and my friend Tiana (who has requested a special shoutout in this playlist and is currently receiving it!) suggested this as a song for us to learn and she was extremely right to do it! It’s extremely funky and probably the most i’ve ever liked Hot Chip because they’ve finally allowed themselves to be emotional and feel the most important emotion of all: horniness.

Infinity Guitars - Sleigh Bells: The other day a friend of mine said ‘hey whatever happened to Sleigh Bells?’ and guess what: they have five albums and continue to release new music as recently as last year. They seem to steadfastly refuse to advance their sound and you’ve got to give them props for that. When nobody else sounds anything like you the smartest thing you can do is double down on your own weird thing. I’ve always loved this song and am totally enamoured by whatever mixing trick it is that enables this song to start loud as fuck and somehow finish even louder no matter what volume you play it at.

Hurricane - Bob Dylan: I haven’t watched the Rolling Thunder Revue thing on Netflix yet but I’m excited to because this is a good Dylan era and I’m always down for more footage of the world’s freak Bobby D acting like a maniac. This song is a good example of how have no control over how music is consumed once you release it because this is ostensibly a serious and angry protest song about a great injustice but my greatest memory of it is for at least a month when I was in boarding school a guy in my dorm would play it every morning super loud and we would all yell the words along as we were getting dressed. Having a great time being fifteen and yelling happily about a miscarriage of justice.

Grindin' - Clipse: I started putting together a playlist of songs with super minimal or no pitched instrumentation that almost totally rely on the percussion and the vocals to carry it. Basically the Pharrell special because he did it on this and Drop It Like It’s Hot and I’m sure more songs of his I haven’t heard yet. But also songs like Lipgloss by Lil Mama, Fix Up Look Sharp by Dizzee Rascal, Tipsy By J-Kwon (almost if it didn’t have the baseline) and The Whisper Song by The Ying Yang Twins. There’s heaps more I’m sure. It was a real minimal style for a little while in the mid 2000s and I think it’s great. It gives you so much space in the mix and it’s a great lesson: if the beat is hot enough and you’ve got enough charisma to carry the vocal you don’t need anything else at all.

Rock Lobster - The B-52's: Did you know the guitar in this is tuned CFFFFF? Did you know this song is nearly 7 minutes long? Did you know The B-52s had a hit with this and then didn’t have another hit until Love Shack fully ten years later? Truly everything about this song is insane.

Johnny Irony - Bad//Dreems: I think ‘are you bleeding?’ is my favourite bit of pre-song hot mic dialogue i’ve ever heard. I love the energy of this song, and what a fun throwback it is to I guess reference Lead Belly’s ancient song about doing cocaine Take A Whiff On Me for a new modern twist on a song about doing cocaine.

Girls On Film - Duran Duran: Have you ever noticed how the bass in this song is absolutely popping off? It rocks. I listened to just the isolated bass track on youtube the other day and it’s my new favourite song. I’m having a big moment with this early eighties art-funk thing where someone figured out you could put huge funky basslines into rock music and completely changed the game.  

Love - Lana Del Rey: I figured out this month that my vocal range seems to be just Lana Del Rey but an octave lower which is absolutely great news for anyone that wants to hear me sing this song in a cowboy voice in my car.

Want You In My Room - Carly Rae Jepsen: I am absolutely in love with this song and also absolutely furious at it. Absolutely in love with the way it’s written like a duet with herself, trading lines and overlapping and harmonising. The big ascending guitar line that leads into the chorus. I love how horny the lyrics are, I love the very 80s robot voice in the chorus who also wants to fuck. It’s just phenomenal, which brings me to the the think that makes me so furious: this song just fades out? After the second chorus just as the saxophone comes in? Just as it’s getting good???

Genevieve (Unfinished) - Jai Paul: It's just unbelievable how good this sounds. The bass sound. The way the whole mix seems to float around. The cuts to silence that feel like someone took a razor randomly to the master. It all culminates in this frenetic nervous energy that feels like the song could just fall apart and stop at any point. And it does! It just fades to silence and then comes back in as a totally different song near the end before fading away again.

Elephant Talk - King Crimson: King Crimson is on Spotify now and I’m comically striking them off my list of Bands I Have A Grudge Against For Not Being On Spotify. It’s always kind of surprised me that for someone who loved The Mars Volta as much as I did I never really had a big King Crimson phase. I always liked them fine, and I love this song, but I never really sat down and gave them a proper listen. Maybe now they’re on streaming that’s all about to change and my girlfriend will have to suffer accordingly.

Kids In The Dark - Bat For Lashes: Very excited for Bat For Lashes next album if this is an indication of the direction. She's always had a very hazy 80s feeling, so purposefully leaning into it is only going to be great.

CHORDS For Organ - Ellen Arkbro: My favourite lady is back with 15 minutes of rock solid chords. Something I've been thinking recently in regards to Ellen Arkbro and Holly Herndon is people who make pretentious art unpretentiously, truly believing in their process and outcomes but very aware  of and fine with the fact that it's silly, useless or unlistenable to anyone who's not interested. Ellen Arkbro posted a photo of an organ on instagram the other day and wrote "turned out this was one of the biggest instruments in berlin and it was also connected up to two other organs in the same space. Despite that I ended up playing an extremely quiet version of my music. I don't really know how that happened. I will play a louder version in st giles cripple gate in london this saturday if you're around" She posts like Courtney Barnett about her experimental organ drone music, I just love it. As for the music itself I don't really know how to explain this other than if you let it it can be extremely overwhelming. It's also the closest I've come musically to Malevich's Black Square and how I feel about that, which is hard to explain properly other that to say I love it.

SWIM - Holly Herndon: I'm obsessed with this Holly Herndon album. It's just amazing though I think the marketing and a lot of the writing about it is sort of.. misleading? There's a lot of emphasis being put on the machine learning and AI aspects of it, which as undoubtedly good and cool as they are, are sort of overshadowing what's so good about this in a simple way which is that it's just choral music for the future. It feels like it reaches so far back and so far forward at the same time it's incredible.

Too Real/Television Screens - Fontaines D.C.: I really had to stop myself from putting the whole Fontaines DC album on here because quite literally every single song on this is amazing. Just when you think guitar music is well and truly dead it pulls you back in!! Also the way he says 'aaa' at the start of Too Real just absolutely kills me.

Dangerous Match Ten - Scientist: I forget where I read it but some bass player was saying she learned to play by listening to Scientist albums, and so that made me listen to Scientist for the first time and go on a long dub trail and have a very good and dangerous day where I thought “..what if I become a dub guy?”. It’s very good. I don’t know anything about dub really, we don’t really have the jamaican population here for it to have any cultural currency like it does in america and the UK so my biggest exposure is the Dub radio station from GTA III and San Andreas which I’m now learning was mostly made up of Scientist songs anyway. Anyway dub is good, please keep an eye one me and watch as this playlist evolves into me becoming an evangelical dub guy over the next few months and start calling everyone m’brethren in a racist way.

Lipitor - Longmont Potion Castle: Lipitor. This is unfortunately unavailable on Australian spotify which is a crime but if you're from anywhere else please enjoy.

A Lot’s Gonna Change/ Andromeda - Weyes Blood: I am having such a time with this Weyes Blood album. Yesterday I spent all day playing A Lot’s Gonna Change over and over and over and today I spent all day listening to Andromeda over and over and learning how to play it. I suspect this will happen to me with the entire album, it has a complete hold over me.

I’ve listened to Weyes Blood before and she’s never really grabbed me and so it took a lot of people rhapsodising about this one to get me to give it a go and I’m so glad I finally did. This album really took me by surprise, and looking back now I love the development of her sound: from her original spacy noisy thing to the bonafide soft rock of Front Row Seat To Earth to this - an expensive sounding 70s singer songwriter pop album of absolutely devastating beauty and inventiveness.

Wasting My Young Years - London Grammar: I think what's so interesting about this song is that it sounds like an acoustic cover of a trance song. I don't really know how to explain it better than that. The way the deceptively fast four on the floor drums come in, the sort of adult-contemporary The XX instrumentation, the whole structure of it, it feels like a BBC Live Lounge cover of some forgotten rave classic. I love it regardless but it's an odd song as well.

Left Hand - Beast Coast: Beast Coast is lames and I didn't make it more that halfway through the album. On the fourth song there's a verse where one of these guys is doing that rap thing of talking way to graphically about eating pussy. He says lick lick lick it's gross. Anyway this song rocks though. The beat is that perfect mix of hard as hell and a little bit spooky and I love any song where one million guys do like four lines each.

Hung Up - Madonna: In the wake of not listening to Madame X I've been reflecting on how it's been 15 years since Madonna's last true banger, Hung Up, and in my opinion she's a legend forever for this song alone. Do you remember the Madonna x Gorillaz performance at the 2006 Grammys? Where she walked BEHIND the hologram? She still has so much to teach us. 

Never Fight A Man With A Perm - IDLES: I love just how purely sweaty man muscle this song is. 'concrete to leather' are you kidding me?? That's the coolest shit I've ever heard. 'You look like you're from Love Island' also quite good.

Speakers Going Hammer - Soulja Boy: I was listening to this the other day and had to keep stopping and rewinding because of how advanced the flow is when he says 'Style swift hot like it's July 10th/Fly chick in my whip with nice tits/Her boyfriend paid for it, I didn't" he's like five minutes in front of the beat and combined with the internal assonance it just sounds sick as hell.

African Woman - Ebo Taylor: Man goes ham on toy piano must see

(I’m Not Your) Stepping Stone - The Monkees: My friend Tiana (who I've mentioned twice now!) came to band practice and said she saw The Monkees last night. I thought no, that's impossible. The Monkees are all long dead, forgotten legends from a forgotten age. BUT I was wrong! Michael Nesmith and Micky Dolenz, the surviving Monkees tour to this day! And she introduced me to this great song which we learned for the band! Monkees forever!

Whoo! Alright! Yeah! .. Uh Huh - The Rapture: Somehow as time goes on this song becomes more and more important to me and more and more groovy.I used to think life’s a bitter pill but it’s a grand old time. Now that’s wisdom.

World Of Stone/Loinclothing - Hunters And Collectors: I've been getting very heavily into early Hunters And Collectors over the last couple of months.  I think I put Loinclothing on last months playlist as well but fuck it, it's great. It's so primal and raw it feels like the first caveman who learned to talk fronting a band of cavemen who sing songs about caveman issues and passion. I love the incredibly wide open sound the drums and bass have and the fidgety guitar combined with the unhinged vocals creates this really unique ambience of menace and power without ever getting particularly busy and losing the spaciousness. Feels like yelling about monkeys on a wide open desert plain.

Coisa No. 10 - Marcello Gonçalves and Anat Cohen: I found this song ages ago on ABC Jazz I think, and I absolutely love the intricacies of it. It twists and folds in on itself over and over and over without ever losing the groove or relaxing into anything easy. There's so much tension in it even though the melody and groove are so fun, it's a great mix. I also found out it's from an album that's a tribute to someone I'd never heard of before named Moacir Santos, so I got the great joy of discovering his music via this song as well.

Monologue/Nana - Moacir Santos: Moacis Santos, as I understand it, was one of Henry Mancini's film composition assistants and also the guy that taught all the Boss Nova geniuses like Sergio Mendes. I love this Monologue where he tells the story of a mystical vision that inspired this song, which you assume being inspired by a vision would be of mythical importance and weight and but instead sounds like the theme to a cartoon about a grandma who has superpowers.

Weird People - Little Mix: I need more info about the identity of the robot voice in this song. What is his relationship to the singer. He starts off antagonistic: “get off the wall” then commenting on what happened to her: “fell off the wall” then just echoing her: “on the other side” then becoming her “i’m living my life”. It’s complicated and hard to explain but I believe the robot voice in this song is god. Anyway this song is a masterpiece. It’s an incredibly goofy and great piece of 80s revival that imagines a glorious alternate future where Oh Yeah by Yello is the template for all pop music.

3 Legged Dog - Marisa Anderson: Marisa Anderson used to write songs with words here and there among her instrumentals but it seems that over the last couple of albums she’s decided to stick to instrumentals only which I think is a shame. She’s obviously brilliant at it but I’d hate to be missing out on beautiful little slices like this. I love how small time this song is, it feels like a song you’d sing to yourself more than a song for anyone else.

Nighttime Suite - Adam Gnade & Demetrius Francisco Antuña: Adam Gnade is a guy I’ve been following for about ten years now who seems determined to stay obscure. He self-releases all his stuff in limited editions or on cassettes, some of my favourite things he’s ever done don’t seem to be available anywhere digitally any more (if they ever were). I remember years ago he seemed hard up for cash and he ran a deal on his website called a ‘lifetime subscription’ where if you sent him I think $100 he would send you everything he’s ever done AND would continue to send you everything he made in the future for the rest of his life. It was absolutely great, I would get CD-Rs and tapes and zines and things delivered randomly to my mailbox every so often for a couple of years and they were all fantastic. I guess at some point my lifetime subscription lapsed because he’s released a bunch of stuff I haven’t heard or read but that’s ok, you shouldn’t be able to buy someone’s eternal soul for $100.

Adam Gnade has developed his own style of folk music where he just recites a sort of prose poetry over music and it’s incredible. In the hands of anyone else it could feel overly pretentious, and he pretty often rides that line. He’s reaching for a sort of poet laureate of Americana ideal but very often he actually grabs it. His writing is great and magnifies the minor details of normal life into larger symptoms of the American mindset, like depression-era songs of marginalised and exploited people individualised and updated for the modern era. Most of the time he backs himself on a lazily strummed guitar or banjo and his music sounds like sitting on the front step or laying down in the tall grass, but for this song he’s teamed up with Demetrius Francisco Antuña for some real Godspeed feeling dark soundscapes and it’s really something.

We Are The Same - Lurch And Chief: I think it's a damn shame that Lurch And Chief broke up before they even put an album out because this song is a damn classic and I have begun praying every day for the return of Lurch and/or Chief. I love a big voice and there's two distinctly huge voices in this song fighting for position.

983/Near DT, MI - Black Midi: Fucking hell I love this Black Midi album. I'm so, so glad it exists. It feels like the next generation of the Slint Hella, Tera Melos etc lineage of math rock and I simply can't get enough of it. Pump it directly into my veins I'm obsessed with it.

Take Control - Amerie: I just screamed out loud in my car hearing this song for the first time because it samples Jimmy, Renda Se by Tom Zé one of my absolute favourite songs ever. And samples it amazingly, totally transforms it into something new while keeping the spirit of the original. Do you ever feel like a song was just made for you personally? It’s a very kind thing of my vlogger wife Amerie to do for me but I guess that’s just how she is. Also, thanks to Spotify’s new feature where you can see the actual credits for songs I got to find out that Hall And Oates are credited on this because it basically interpolates the the whole verse melody from You Make My Dreams Come True which I didn’t even realise until I looked up why they were credited.

Unsquare Dance - Dave Brubeck: Dave Brubeck's brain is huge. I can't belive it's possible to make 7/4 this funky. How come nobody else ever ripped off this rhythm? It deserves to be a whole genre. I also totally love the piano solo near the end where it turns into like a funky 7/4 stride and then abruply ends with a shave and haircut like it's 1925.

Suddenly - French Vanilla: Get a load of this fucking slice of dance punk that Discover Weekly served me up. I haven't even listened ot the album yet because I just love this song so much I'm stuck on it. Singing "I like the nightlife! I'm in the spotlight!" like you're being hunted with a knife? Incredible. The impromptue glossolalia about halfway through? Incredible. Everything about the saxophone? Incredible

Maneater - Nelly Furtado: There's nothing deft or subtle about Timbaland. Everything he does is just so heavy handed and thick. The drums in this are so straightforward and they sound like garbage cans.. Nothing ever plays at he same time as anything else . It's like a gorilla learned to play and it's absolutely fucking sick. And then the whole rest of the song! His insanely thick buzzy synth lines against the big beautifully stack clean harmonies

I, The Witchfinder - Electric Wizard: I've been getting back into Skyrim because I have a little worm living in my brain and I've discovered a good trick is to turn off the game music and turn on Electric Wizard instead. It increases the ambience because it feels like if you did an x-ray of the Dragonborn's head this is all that would be in there. It's just stoner metal in there and no other thoughts.

Music Sounds Better With You - Stardust: Can you believe how lucky we are to live in a world where the greatest song ever written is finally available on spotify? You can just listen to this any time of the night or day and immediately improve your life.

Don’t Chew - Spilled Oats: Here’s a very good and underexplored idea: what if guitar music but it sounds like chopped and screwed? Absolutely dynamite.

 As an extra bonus treat here the absolute best ever chopped and screwed channel I’ve found on youtube, please explore Scobed & Robed: https://www.youtube.com/user/scottalexanderburton

listen here

[lovemesomesurveys]

What Rhymes With “AIR”?

1.   Are the walls of your room bare or do you have things hanging up there? I have some stuff on my walls.

2.   When’s the last time you went outside to enjoy the fresh air? I briefly went outside at night on the 4th of July to see the fireworks from my driveway with my family. Prior to that I hadn’t been out of the house since May and before that it had been since March. 

3.   Do you watch the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air? Sometimes.

4.   When’s the last time it felt like you were walking on air? I had one bad floating feeling experience from a bad edibles trip. I literally felt like I had to hold onto something to “stay grounded.” I also ended up getting sick. It wasn’t a fun time. I found out the hard way after that time that it didn’t take much of an edible for me to get high lol. It tricks you cause it can take a bit to kick in, so you think you need more, but nope.

5.   Have you ever been on air, on a radio station? Yeah. I used to call to request a song sometimes back in the day and my call  was on air a few times.

6.   Have you ever felt like all of the air was coming out of your lungs? Yes.

7.   Has it seemed as though anything has ever disappeared into thin air? Have you ever pulled an idea out of thin air? Yes! So frustrating. I’ll be using something and then put it down for a sec, only to not be able to find it where I thought I put it. Like for instance, it happens a lot when I’m wrapping presents. The pen or scissors I’m using always seem to “disappear.” RIP to all the pens that seemed to just vanish, too, throughout my school years. And yes, I’ve also pulled ideas “out of thin air.”

8.   Have you ever wanted to be on “Who Wants to Be a Millionaire”? I enjoyed playing along while watching and I even had a computer game version, but nah. I wouldn’t get far at all and it’d be embarrassing. I don’t do well with being put on the spot either.

9.   Do you know a billionaire in real life? No.

10.   Would you like to be an heir or heiress to a fortune? I mean, I wouldn’t have been opposed to it if I was haha.

11.   Would you be able to successfully get away if you ever came across a bear? I mean, there’s no way of knowing for sure, but I hope so?? Well, I hope to never be in the situation in the first place, obviously, but you know. There are people who have certainly been quite lucky in that situation and others not so much, so. I know you’re supposed to remain calm and not run, which I could probably do cause I’d likely freeze up in fear. I’ve seen videos of people, some of them have been children, who successfully got away.

12.   Where’s your favorite place to go? How long does it take to get there? The beach. The closest one is like 2 hours away.

13.   How often do you err on the side of caution? I’m a cautious person. And also just a big scardy cat.

14.   How often do people say they’re angry with you? People don’t say that, but I know people have been upset, frustrated, disappointed, and irritated with me.

15.   Do you own any long underwear? Long underwear? No...

16.   How much Tupperware do you own? *shrug* A lot.

17.   What color is your underwear right now? Blue and gray.

18.   Do you still sleep with a teddy bear? No. I have a few stuffed animals that always sit on my bed, though.

19.   What pair of your shoes has the most wear and tear? My Adidas Superstars. They’re not too bad, but you can definitely tell I wore them quite often.

20.   Do you like to play Solitaire? Ha, I haven’t played since I played the computer version as a kid on like Windows 98. I played that and messed around in Paint quite a bit, ha.

21.   Do you or your family own a full set of silverware? Yeah.

22.   What do you have to take everywhere with you? My bag with my medicine, hand sanitizer, phone, wallet, and straws. I’d also have to take a mask with me everywhere.

23.   Would you like to visit Delaware? I hadn’t really thought about it.

24.   Last time you received dental care? It’s been awhile. 

25.   If you could go anywhere in the world, where would it be? I’d want to really think about that if I could only choose one destination. There’s a lot of places I’d like to travel to one day.

26.   Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego? Did we ever find her? I don’t remember, ha. I used to watch the cartoon as a kid and I think I had a computer game, too.

27.   Are you satisfied sitting here, taking this survey, or would you rather be elsewhere? Right here in bed is the best place for me to be right now. 

28.   Last time you sat in a barber’s chair? I last got my hair done back in early February. 

29.   Do you own any cans of compressed air? No.

30.   Do you have a swivel chair at your desk? I don’t have a swivel chair or a desk.

31.   Do you prefer an armchair or a rocking chair? A reclining armchair. 

32.   Would you rather have a beanbag chair or a hanging swing chair in your room? Hanging swing chair.

33.   What’s the last non-survey related questionnaire that you had to fill out? This like 4 page questionnaire that one of my doctors hands out every visit. It’s the same exact questionnaire, too.

34.   Are there any crimes that you feel make someone deserving of the electric chair? Yes, like serial killers.

35.   Do you know anyone who uses a wheelchair? Yeah, me.

36.   Do you know anyone who is on welfare? Yes.

37.   Do you play Modern Warfare? Nope. Never had an interest in playing that.

38.   Do you ever feel like life is unfair? Of course.

39.   Have you ever visited Times Square? No. I’ve never been to New York, but I’d love to one day. I wasn’t sure when I’d be able to go before everything this year, but now I really don’t know.

40.   Do you tell people to “take care” at the end of a conversation with them? It’s not something I regularly say, but yeah sometimes.

41.   Where is somewhere that you would like to move to? I’m not sure.

42.   What is something in your home that needs to be repaired? A couple things.

43.   What kind of sleepwear do you own? I wear leggings and oversized graphic tees for pjs and my normal attire.

44.   What skin care products do you use? I haven’t been using any.

45.   Do you have any spyware on your computer? Apple computers come with all that stuff.

46.   Do you own any sportswear? What sports? Nope. Not a sports fan.

47.   Do you like Fred Astaire? I know who he is and I’ve seen clips of his dance scenes, but I haven’t actually watched any of his films. Well, I’ve heard his voice work in the Santa Clause is Comin’ to Town movie/cartoon, but that’s all.

48.   How long does it take you to prepare a meal? The only thing I cook is ramen, which takes like 10 minutes or so (I’m including the time to boil the water).

49.   Do you know anyone named Pierre? No.

50.   Are you going nowhere fast? It has and does feel that way. :/

51.   How often do you have a nightmare? Not often, thankfully. 

52.   How often are you able to catch something in mid-air? *shrug*

53.   What do your lawn chairs look like? We don’t have any lawn chairs.

54.   How many chairs are at your dining/kitchen table? We don’t have a dining/kitchen table either.

55.   Favorite type of footwear? Adidas sneakers.

56.   When’s the last time one of your senses were impaired? From what? I wear glasses if that counts?

57.   Have you ever been in a hot air balloon before? Noooo.

58.   Do you have a good health care plan? Yes.

59.   Last time you went to the hardware store? I don’t go to the hardware store.

60.   Have you ever played foursquare before? Yeah, I liked playing that in elementary school.

61.   Do you own any types of eyewear? Yep, my glasses.

62.   What brand of cookware do you have a lot of? Cuisine Art, probably.

63.   Nothing can compare to: You. 🎶 Ha.

64.   Have you ever worked in a childcare center? No.

65.   Do you have a “beware of dog” sign on your gate? No.

66.   Have you ever attended daycare as a child? No.

67.   Are you very aware of your surroundings? Yes.

68.   Have you ever had an au pair or a nanny before? No. My aunts, grandparents, or older brother babysat me.

69.   Do you know anyone who has had an affair? Yes.

70.   How much are you willing to spend on airfare? I don’t know, it would depend on certain factors regarding the trip.

71.   Who do you care about the most? My loved ones.

72.   Are you more likely to choose truth or dare? Truth, never dare. Or just not play at all, ha. 

73.   Have you ever seen the Blair Witch Project before? Yeah. Major cringe.

74.   Do you like the name Claire? Would you spell it with or without the I? Sure. I like the spelling with the “I.”

75.   Last time you went to a fair? When I was a kid.

76.   What can be done to make life more fair? Gah. 

77.   How much are you willing to spend on cab fare? I don’t know. Again, it would depend on certain factors.

78.   Do you have a lot of flair? No.

79.   Do you own flare jeans? No.

80.   Is there a glare on your computer screen right now? Yes.

81.   When’s the last time someone glared at you? I say my doggo gives me attitude and “the eye” sometimes, ha. Like when I tell my parents or brother that I gave her treats, so don’t let her trick you into getting more. She gives me a look like, “gee, thanks a lot for ratting me out!”

82.   What type of hair do you have? (color, length, texture, etc) How often do you wash it? Red, long, wavy hair. I wash it every 2-3 days.

83.   Do you know the difference between a rabbit and a hare? Yeah.

84.   Do you like to eat eclairs? I haven’t had one in a long time, but they are delicious.

85.   What do you consider to be your lair? My room.

86.   A female horse is called a mare. What is a male horse called? A baby horse? A male horse is a stallion and a baby is called a foal

87.   Have you ever used Nair before? Did it work? Blech, yeah I tried it when I was like 13/14. It worked, but it smelled SO bad.

88.   Has anyone ever told you to “grow a pair”? No.

89.   What is something that you own a pair of? Shoes.

90.   What is a rare quality that you have? I can’t think of one.

91.   Last food you pared? I don’t peel or chop anything.

92.   Do you know someone who is a debonair? No.

93.   Do you like to scare others for fun? No.

94.   What is something that scares you? The present and the future.

95.   Do you like Sonny and Cher? “I don’t know if all that’s true, but you got me and baby I got you. Babe. I got you, babe.”

96.   Do you know how to share? Do you like to share? Yeah.

97.   Have you ever played a snare drum before? No.

98.   What do you do with your spare change? Put it in one of my purses/bags.

99.   Do you know how to put on a spare tire? No. I’ve never tried to.

100. Have you ever gotten a spare while bowling before? I think so.

101. When’s the last time you wished someone would spare you the details? Recently, when someone shared something that was TMI.

102.  Do you win games fair and square? Yes. I like to just have fun and friendly competition, there’s no need to cheat or get upset about it. 

103. Do you know how to find the square root of something? Yeah.

104.   What are the characteristics of a square shape? 4 equal sides.

105. Have you ever been called a square before? Haha, yeah, jokingly. Well, the times I know of, ha. An “L-7 wienie.”

106.   Do you prefer the elevator or the stairs? Well, I have to take the elevator.

107.  Do you ever stare at other people? No. I’ve had to deal with that (people staring at me) all my life, though.

108. How often do you swear? Not that often.

109. Do you ever “swear on your life”? I don’t say that.

110. What do you like to “tear up”? An order of boneless wings from Wingstop, ha.

111. What type of wares would you sell? I don’t have anything to sell.

112. What kinds of clothing do you like to wear? Comfy clothing--leggings and oversized tees.

113. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare before? Nope.

[a-zebra-is-a-striped-horse]

[musedblues]

A Nice Surprise with Gwilym

W/C: 4040

Warnings: None? Sweet enough to rot your teeth? I love a good cross over?

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

For as long as you could remember, rock and roll was the most important thing in your life. Besides Gwilym, of course. After literally running right into each other outside the local repertory theater, Gwilym quickly became the second most important thing to you right then and there. You made your devotion to all things rock and roll clear from the get-go. Your first date went a little something like this…

“So, I’m well aware you were apart of the production I had the pleasure of taking in, last weekend. A lover of the arts, eh?”

“An aspiring actor is all. All the expression… I adore bringing stories to life.” His crystal eyes sparkled as he spoke, and you admired his lean figure. Resting your chin on the heel of your hand, you didn’t feel ashamed of swooning over the man who offered to treat you to dinner, to ‘make up for running right into you’ or so he said.

“What do you adore?” Gwilym dared to ask, leaning a little closer and looking to you with undivided attention. You were so lost in that look in his pretty eyes that you nearly didn’t register what words his extremely kissable lips formed.

“Huh? Oh, me? Well…” You straightened your posture and felt like you were revealing some kind of secret. Wasn’t a twenty-something girl fawning over a bunch of old, washed-up musicians a bit taboo, after all?

“I love rock and roll.” You mused, nearly like a joke.

“So put another dime in-” Gwilym’s perfectly fitted response was so quick that you couldn’t help but snort a laugh, cutting off the end of his referenced quote. He was just cheesy enough for your liking.

“And what’s so special about rock and roll, mhh?” Gwilym asked after chuckling a beat, himself. He rose a glass of champagne to his lips as you looked in his eyes, still piercing into yours.

You considered every moment you’d ever heard an electric guitar being played like a battle cry or a harmonica sound off a warning. You thought of every famous album and melody and where you were in life when those songs became your world. One moment stood out from the rest.

“It all began when I was old enough to climb up to my mother’s makeup vanity and steal her lipstick. I would slather on the deepest shade of red, and drape her pearls over my head.” You let out a giggle, recalling the scene. “The radio in the living room was cranked all the way up, and the very moment I glanced at myself all made up, Killer Queen started playing. Little me was utterly convinced the song was being written just for me in that moment.”

“Killer Queen. There’s no doubting that.” Gwilym laughed along with you but rose a sudden and serious brow as he pointed to the bottle of Moet en Chandon on the table between us, to prove his musical knowledge and the point he had just made.

Since that day, you hadn’t parted. Gwilym learned to put up with your blaring music at all hours, stopping songs in the middle of the best choruses to rattle off facts about bands and backstories. 

You repaid the tall, handsome man by practicing lines with him, before auditions. Years of sing-alongs and movie nights meant growing to respect each other’s passions and careers. Gwilym worked his way into some televised productions and swore that he wouldn’t have landed those roles if you hadn’t helped him remember what to say during the audition.

You found yourself a weekend gig at a radio station, hosting a show with an older woman who lived through all the precious rock and roll saturated years you longed to know everything about. You looked into the greatest music from either perspective and gained a steady following on the internet of all places. When you scurried off to record another episode, Gwilym would pop in the studio on the rare occasions he wasn’t busy, sitting outside the booth, leaning towards the window and giving you eyes while you tried to banter with your cohost.

You bought a tiny cottage just outside of the city where you could play records as loud as you desired. Your favorite music often kept you company when there was little to be found. As the years passed, you became used to Gwilym’s long days full of auditions that turned into late-night rehearsals, that turned into early morning milkshake runs; but only after he would pick you up and take you back to the city he’d just come from to show you off to all his television friends.

But today was different. Today Gwilym burst into your modern cottage with a wild look in his eye, smack dab in the middle of the day. You were busy hanging a picture frame on the wall, mindlessly dancing to the Bowie album that blared through the speakers in the kitchen. Your boyfriend’s sudden and intense presence caught you off guard and you let out a gasp as he reached out to you in a hurry.

“What the hell, Gwil?” You panicked as the slender man grabbed your arm and pulled you toward the living room.

“What’s going on, are you okay?” You felt your chest constrict as you monitored Gwyilm’s nervous energy as he guided me toward the bright blue sofa.

“Nothing is wrong, darling, but I need you to sit down because I think you might pass out.”

“Nothing is wrong?” You questioned, easing onto the couch as Gwilym scooted next to you, grabbing both of your hands in his own. For a guy who claimed to be unharmed, he sure wasn’t acting like it.

“I got a call today, during lunch hour thank God.” Gwilym swallowed, looking into either of your eyes with his wide, shiny pair.

“Uh-huh…” You nodded slowly encouraging him to spill the beans.

“God, this feels like a big practical joke.” Gwilym’s eyes darted around the room nervously. The sun was bright and beaming across the too quiet living room.

“Gwilym!” You rang, raising your brows and squeezing his hands, unable to take the torture any longer.

“I-I… got a call from a casting director. They’ve been searching for someone who resembles Brian May. They found me. They didn’t even ask for an audition, well, they said there wasn’t much of a competition, they want me to play Brain May. Brian May wants me to play Brian May.”

Gwilym’s grip on your hands was vice worthy and his eyes looked into your own as if he’d just confessed a sin. What was that last part? The guitarist himself had something to say about the matter? All you could do was let your jaw hang open as Gwilym looked to you like a little boy would look to his mother. A memory came flashing across your mind all of sudden, fogging your brain…

“Oh come on, I wish someone would just do something!” You whined, curling up next to Gwilym on the couch as you both mindlessly scrolled through your cellphones. You’d stumbled upon an interview with Dr. Brian May discussing his endless efforts to create a biopic about Queen’s legendary story, and how hard it had been to land a deal.

“You know people, Gwil, tell someone to help poor ol’ Bri.” You pretended to pout, showing your devoted boyfriend the article you’d come across.

“I wish.” Gwil seemed to mean. “Let’s just put on A Night At The Opera and make our own movie. Best of both worlds, eh?” Gwil smirked before ruining your pity party with a kiss.

“Gwil! What did you say?” You wondered all of a sudden, snapping back to reality and realizing he hadn’t yet revealed his answer.

“Yes. I said yes.” Gwilym spoke softly, seeming to wrap his head around the reality of this role, for the first time. His first major role. You let out a breathy laugh as you considered your favorite band and your favorite man colliding in a way that you didn’t even know was possible. You threw yourself into Gwilym’s arms as you both laughed with glee, between Gwilym’s whimpers as he admitted his unadulterated fear of the pending role of a lifetime.

_

After a couple of solid months of studying your boyfriend’s face from across the kitchen table, you still couldn’t see it. You would consider each of his features and how they were shaped, in the grocery aisle, while he drove, as he lay sleeping next to you. Well, maybe…

“I don’t know what’s worse, really. I either don’t look enough like the lad to land the role, or I look a bit too much like him, and you become some kind of a loon, calling me Dr. and pretending it’s 1974, or something.”

Gwilym joked, resting his dirty dish in the kitchen sink, waggling a brow to you as he brushed past.

“Oh, you poor thing.” You mused, reaching out and grabbing the man by the waist. You would be a loon for him no matter how he looked. Luckily for you, he was an eleven out of ten.

Gwilym had, in fact, landed the role, and you weren’t surprised. He was a talented performer, considering the details. You knew that even if you couldn’t see the resemblance between him and your favorite guitar player now, that Gwilym’s attention to the little quirks would make up for your lacking point of view.

As soon as Gwilym got the green light, the car he raced toward his future in only had one speed. Neither of you had ever experienced such an intense schedule, and even the table reads were keeping Gwilym away as long as he might have been during a normal day on the television set. 

You began to prepare yourself for his absence and the periods of dullness that filled the spaces between, when he was too tired to keep up a conversation after work. Sleep was just about all you did together when he began any production.

But everything about this role was different. He was always buzzing, totally alive with nerves at the mention of Queen. At the mention of anything, really. Like he’d been given a pair of glasses to see color for the first time, he could hardly sit still. Luckily, he had actually listened to your rambling over the years and held onto bits of information you shared about Queen with great delight. Little did you know these funs facts would turn into pure gold a few years down the line. Each time you made Gwilym sing 'You’re My Best Friend’ during your rainy day karaoke parties seemed like an unnoticed build-up to the moment he was cast in the film.

And like any and every other production, Gwilym would beg for you to come and spend the day with him on set. He longed for you to watch him in his element, and you secretly wanted to sneak a peek at your love in the midst of a life-changing opportunity. But as the reality of the film set in, you grew petrified to step foot anywhere near the set. The first day Gwilym met his match, he practically came home in tears.

“You should have been there.” He looked to you, eyes sparkling and full of emotion. He’d just spent four hours receiving a guitar lesson from Brian May.

“Oh no. No, no, no! I absolutely cannot meet them. I’ll make a fool of myself.” You hissed, looking to Gwilym like a madman. Why would he dare bring his fanatic girlfriend on set, knowing she would likely cause some kind of scene? Once, The Velvet Underground’s Pale Blue Eye’s started playing over the loudspeakers during the local autumn flea market festival and you squealed along to the first verse so loudly that every pair of eyes within five feet of you glared your way. You weren’t even drunk. Nor was The Velvet Underground on the top twenty list of your favorite bands ever. So imagining what you might do or say face to face with a member of your all-time favorite group, didn’t seem very promising.

As the days passed and Gwilym became more invested, You managed to be coaxed into going out for dinner with his newly collected cast of friends. You’d heard an ear full about each of them, and felt happy to make their acquaintance, watching how each of them seemed to adore each other, your darling boyfriend included. As Gwilym’s other half, your heart swelled with the knowledge that this group of peers was quickly surpassing the 'friend’ title and headed straight for 'family.’

But as a fan, who pinned for this film to be created, who danced to the music, well you shoved giddy feelings deep down and tried not to embarrass yourself in public for the first time ever. In fact, as your knowing each other furthered, Queen’s music was a scarce topic.

You’d taken a particular liking to Lucy, the pair of you would gush over girly things while the boys laughed about whatever garish mistakes they made on set that day. When you would stumble out of bars, the boys would hug you and ask you to drop by the set the next day. Every time. Lucy even asked for you to help her with some kind of hair extension conundrum, rather than her makeup lady.

Gwilym didn’t push any further as he settled to spend the next few days at home, but still surrounded himself with work. He asked you to leave out all your Queen records and would even spout off random facts about certain songs before you could, even though you both already knew.

Records, albums, CD’s and Spotify, there was always music coming from somewhere at all times.

You smiled to yourself as you shampooed your hair, listening to Gwilym sing along to the songs that blared from your phone, in the bathroom. A little bit of The Beatles helped ease the Queen swell you’d happily succumb too. 

Gwil stopped singing and left the bathroom when the doorbell rang but instructed you to keep singing because your shower performances were some of your very best. You could sing, and did so with pride, especially when it came to The Beatles. You couldn’t let your four favorites mopped topped insects down, so you sang without care. Anyone who had the guts to come over in the early morning had likely already heard you sing because God knows you’d never really stopped. It was like a sickness, a virus. Beatlemania. Hell, you’d even come down with a bad case of Monkeemania a few winters ago. Rock and roll had a unique way of knocking you off your feet in a way that no other thing could do. Your chest would grow heavy and fill up with a certain emotion that didn’t have a name, when a guitar solo was heard. Your head would stir into obscurity when a melody swept through your ears just the right way.

You took your time getting ready for the day, drying your hair and changing into a nice jumper, and considering how undoubtedly lucky you were to have been so affected by a certain collection of sounds. How precious the discs these sounds were stored on, were. How intimidating the people who thought up these sounds were, and how absolutely fantastical it was to watch them bring the sounds to life, right before the eyes and ears of the people who adore them the most.

Nothing could come between you and your music. You left your phone blaring in the bathroom, One song fading into another, far away as you hummed along down the hallway, wondering where Gwilym had been all this time. You were so lost in your musical haze that you’d nearly forgotten someone had rung the bell.

You heard his voice, holding some kind of conversation in the living room, and the light hum of another you couldn’t quite recognize. That’s when you rounded the corner to a very shocking surprise.

“Oh, hello at last!”

It was him. 

It was really him. Brian May was casually sat in your very favorite high back clawfooted chair, wearing a sly smirk. His thick cloud of hair was recognizable from across the room, and his upturned lips were just as familiar. You knew this man, his voice, his looks, his life. But this was your very first encounter. It was like Santa Clause had come a season early… like you’d caught a glimpse of something very special that no one should have been able to.

You drew a hand to your mouth in a wide-eyed instant, totally unprepared for this scenario to play out. Never really certain it ever would have, wondering how it might have, always wishing it would. This wasn’t the way anything had played out between those thoughts in your head.

“Come meet Brian, love. He’s just popped by to help me out with a few things.” Gwilym stood from the relaxed position he held on the couch and reached out to you as if this were any other interaction. You looked at your boyfriend, completely bewildered as you realized that Brian May was in your house and he probably heard you singing. 

Gwilym kept a gentle grasp on your elbow as he guided you further into the room,  tracing soft circles to assure you that you weren’t dreaming. After all this time, and every moment that had built up to now, you hadn’t expected to meet Brian this way. Or at all, really. You mentally cursed yourself and tried your utmost to retrieve any semblance of a calm and cool demeanor.

“How nice it is to meet you.” You breathed, really truly meaning it.

“You know, I heard you in there. You’re quite good.” Brian rose a thick brow, leaning towards you as you eased onto the sofa next to Gwilym who was far too comfortable with this situation for your liking. You signed up to do everything together, dammnit, he should be in a fluster too! And what was that? Oh great, Brain May heard you singing. Abort. Mission.

“Oh my God.” You let out a shaky breath, drawing a hand to your furrowed brow, and beginning to mumble out an apology to the rock and roll royalty sat across from you.

“No, don’t apologize.” Brian stopped you with a lithe chuckle in that velvet voice you’d only ever heard through speakers, until now. “I really should have rang first, it’s not too polite to just show up, never having done before. But I found these old photographs, you see, and I just had to show Gwil before we started back on set.”

Brian reached inside his jacket pocket as you exchanged a “please help me” glance with Gwilym who was all smiles. He rested an easy hand on your knee and his touch was more than enough to calm your rapid heartbeat. But you still could not believe this was happening. Brian leaned toward you, motioning for your attention to three sunbleached polaroids. All of them were of the guitarist as a young man, in various stages of removing his trousers backstage someplace.

“Fred used to carry this prehistoric camera around and snap photos of all his pals. He took these when I wasn’t looking, but it wasn’t blackmailing, you know, because he gave the shots to me. He was drawn to the every day, just as much as the outlandish. Hell, he made the everyday outlandish.”

Brian’s eyes sparked, a hazel pair of eye’s that you hadn’t noticed the color of until they were looking into yours. He handed the three polaroids over to Gwilym who leaned toward you while you giggled at the content, mentioning Brian’s striped boxers.

“I want you to keep those.”

“Oh, I couldn’t possibly.” Gwilym’s voice drifted from laughter and grew full of emotion while you felt your chest grow heavy. Here you were, across from one of Freddie Mercury’s closest friends, cherishing at a set of photographs the singer himself captured. You ran a finger across the border of the photograph and felt a chill run down your spine.

“Consider it a gift from Fred.” Brian simply spoke, as Gwilym and you kept your eyes on the photos. It was as if Brian had read your mind, thoughts of Freddie were running wild. You couldn’t possibly bring up the long passed fellow now, but your head was full of him and you wanted to cry. This was the closest you’d ever been to the frontman you’d idolized for so long, closer than most people were lucky to dream of getting. Your emotions must have been showing.

“You know, he told me the lipstick story.” Brian rested his long arms on his knees, leaning close to catch your eye, giving you a knowing smile. You replayed the memory of sneaking into your mother’s makeup just as Killer Queen flooded your innocent ears for the first time. It was a turning point in your life, one where you realized your deepest love. Now you sat looking into the eyes of one of the men who made that very song, and that very moment, possible.

For a brief moment, you hung your head and shook it, completely overwhelmed by everything you had taken in the past few minutes.

“God, that’s so embarrassing.” You let out a nervous chuckle, raising your eyes to meet the famous guitarists.

“And, it’s proper blackmail! I’ll be sure to tell Rog if you don’t show up to the set after the weekend break. Every great artist need’s his muse.” Brian turned his loving gaze to Gwilym, and you could see how their eye’s sparked in the same way. Maybe there was something there after all…

You felt Gwilym’s hand clasp your knee as he let out a laugh. You couldn’t hold back your shocked chuckle either, admiring the light in your favorite musician’s eyes. Brian stayed for a half-hour longer, absolutely gushing over your boyfriend. You and Brian joined some kind of force, sharing your favorite things about the Gwil. His gentle voice, the care he took in his career, and how his smile could melt the coldest of hearts and apparently already had. According to Brian, a cameraman with a permanent scowl noticed Gwilym bare his teeth as a good morning greeting, and the workers usually sullen face lit up for the first and only time.

When Brian stood to leave, he dared to wrap you in a real genuine hug. It wasn’t a pitiful interaction based on your adoration of him, either. Somewhere during your visit, You realized that Gwilym’s role had opened up a set of a door for you all, and somehow, Brian May and yourself were interacting on common ground. You hugged him back and understood that your knowing each other had just begun. The old man winked to his younger doppelganger before scurrying out the door and shouting something about seeing you both when the weekend was over.

“Okay so…” Gwilym sighed as he pushed the front door to a close. “I may… or may not… have totally set that up.”

Your darling boyfriend rose his eyebrows as a cocky grin spread across his face. You let your mouth hang open as he leaned against the door, crossing his arms with twisted pride.

“You’re a crazy man. Have you gone mad?” You let out a loud laugh, considering everything that just happened in an all-new way. Gwil invited Brian over? Oh, that little-

“Crazy about you!” Gwilym reached out to you all of a sudden, ignoring your twinge of shock.

“Firstly, you love him. You adore his music. You told me so the very day I met you, all those years ago. Secondly, I adore his music. Thirdly, I adore you. And, fourth, Brian has become more than a musician to me, and I couldn’t stand for you going on without meeting any longer.” Gwilym pulled you into a comforting embrace and you searched his deep eyes as he spoke, really meaning it.

That night, you conducted another one of many karaoke parties and Gwilym stole your thunder when 'Your My Best Friend’ flashed up on the screen.

Let’s just say, you never missed 'bring your girlfriend to work day,’ after that. But you enjoyed coming home to your Gwilym even more and more and more.

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

[secret-diary-of-an-fa]

Secret-Diary Recommends Some Music

I’m not exactly a ‘music person’, in that I don’t know a lot about the mechanics that underpin it: I couldn’t look at sheet music and tell you what the tune is or describe the change in chords in a classical piece. I’m not even 100% sure what the difference between a Ukulele and a Banjo is, aside from the fact that one is played by coquettish islanders while I get shit-faced on Pina Colladas in the background and the other is played by Louisiana bootleggers from the 1920s with comedy accents. All that being said, I know enough to know that the overwhelming preponderance of music produced today is total crap. Every time I’m foolish enough to tune a radio to a musical station, there’s a new barely-pubescent twatwipe peeping about their feelings in a tupperware voice that strongly suggests they don’t actually have any. Either that or its some nominally grown-ass man or woman singing something that they imagine is sassy and empowering but actually just makes them sound like Gary from World’s End- only less charming, because immature, quasi-literate manbabies are infinitely more annoying when they’re real. The point is, it’s a fucking wasteland out there. Trying to find a band (from now or the past) who you’d actually want to listen to can be a chore. That’s why, as your gracious patron and benefactor, I’ve decided to share the fruits of my musical explorations with you and hit you with some recommendations. I’ve tried to be as eclectic as possible, since I want everyone who reads this to find something they’ll like, no matter how radically divergent their individual tastes are. Some of the entries on this list are famous, some are obscure and some were famous but have been made obscure by the passage of time. I’ve tried to limit myself to people whose music you might not be fully aware of, even if you’ve heard of them to some extent, but I’m not plugged into what is and isn’t popular with peeps nowadays, so don’t read too much into my choices if they seem either too obvious or too bizarre. Here goes.

1. The Orion Experience An ultra-camp synthesis of New Romantic music, bubble-gum pop and modern vocal stylings, The Orion Experience are unlike anything else you’ll have heard recently. They seem to borrow as much from the original Decadent tradition in art and literature as from later musical iterations, meaning that their lyrics are complex and sophisticated without being especially deep. They’re primarily concerned with building aesthetically-interesting and richly-evocative language-constructs rather than performing an emotion that no-one in the band is actually feeling. The deliberate artifice is deeply refreshing in a musical landscape of faked sincerity and forced emoting. I recommend starting with the songs The Cult of Dionysus and Sugar. If you like those, the rest of their stuff may also interest you.

2. Trace Adkins During an attempt to write a wild west/sci-fi fusion novel, I went on a musical odyssey, looking for apposite songs that would gel well with the world I was building (knowing a world’s soundtrack can help cement that world in your imagination- try it, if you’re a writer yourself). Anyway, I stumbled across Trace Adkins- a country singer with a palpable sense of humour about being a country singer and a knack for delivering a silly-but-well-turned phrase. Also, without getting technical, his tunes just flat-out rock. I have no idea how well known he in the Country and Western World, but since his existence came as news to me, I’m sticking him on this list. Start with the surprisingly sexy Honky Tonk Badonkadonk and graduate to Hot Momma and Whoop a Man’s Ass. You’ll know if it’s your sort of thing from the first minute of any of those songs.

3. Caravan Palace Have ye heard of a thing called Electric Swing? If you’re reading a blog post about music, you probably have, but just in case you haven’t, let me tell you it’s a fantastic genre. Imagine if The Great Gatsby owned a synth and took a fuckload of mind-squanching hallucinogens. Well, that’s Electric Swing. Few do it better than Caravan Palace, who also seem to borrow heavily from club music and other genres, adding these to their unique blend. For some pure Electric Swing, start with Susie. For something a little more modern, start with Lone Digger.

4. 11 Acorn Lane Speaking of Electric Swing, I can also recommend 11 Acorn Lane, whose lyrics can be a little more playful than those of Caravan Palace. They also have a somewhat more classic sound. Start with Let’s Face it I’m Cute for a great sample of their work.

5. The Fratellis Now, my UK readers have almost certainly heard of The Fratellis, since they actually got some traction on mainstream radio over here. I’m less sure about those of you reading along in America, so allow me to make an introduction. Their music is joyously and unapologetically grimy and proletarian, paring an unrivaled sense of fun and energy with a sly, low-key feeling of cynicism and detachment. The tunes and melodies evoke Rock, punk and New-Wave (think The Ramones by way of The Proclaimers) without wholly relying on any of them. Check out Chelsea Dagger or Henrietta to hear them at their most gleefully up-tempo-yet-jaded, or try Vince the Lovable Stoner for a more chill, tongue-in-cheek song.

5. Dionne Warwick You’ve probably heard of her in connection with There’s Always Something There to Remind Me, especially since it featured heavily in that one fantastic episode of Black Mirror. However, you might not have realised just how much she’s contributed to musical history: her soft-yet-powerful voice and classic Rock rhythms and tunes combine to create something archetypal yet unique. Leap right in with Do You Know the Way to San Jose and discover a fucking legend.

6. Rufus Rex Ever wanted to hear a freakishly talented man singing songs based on horror films and books (particularly the works of H.P. Lovecraft) in a style that evokes Goth music but defies genre on closer inspection? Then get your arse over to Rufus Rex and start plumbing the nightmarish depths of horror-music with the song World’s In Between.

7. Studio Killers Contemporary electronic music with surprisingly inventive and weird lyrics. That about sums up Studio Killers, really. Look, not everything on this list can be genre-transcendent or epoch-defining: some things are just very good examples of the type of music they belong to. If you haven’t heard of them, start with the song Eros and Apollo then check out Ode to the Bouncer, then compare and contrast: those two songs represent the two opposite edges of the musical spectrum they cover, so if you like either one, at least some of their songs will be for you. Also, treat yourself to the music videos on Youtube: they’re surreal and awsesome.

8. Fishbone A punky ska band from back in the day, Fishbone are on this list for one reason and one reason only: Party at Ground Zero. Party at Ground Zero is an upbeat, gloriously energetic song about nuclear war. It’s a total jam and you absolutely have to experience it for yourself.

9. Tomska Tomska... isn’t technically a professional musician. He’s a Youtube comedian, short-film maker and collaborative animator who became internet-famous for his ‘ASDF movies’. On the off-chance that you haven’t seen them, they’re short collections of animated skits and jokes rendered in a simple but immediately-compelling and recognisable style. Anyway, Tomska decided to create fast-paced, catchy songs about some of the recurring characters in his ASDF movies, and those songs turned out to be fucking amazing- being both laugh-out-loud funny and actually really musically ambitious and well put together. Check them out on his channel. I’m particularly fond of Mine Turtles, but you do you.

10. Paul Anka Big band and jazz musician Paul Anka once set out on a quest to create 1920s-sounding versions of famous rock ‘n’ roll songs and the results can only be described as ‘eargasmically epic’. His versions of Jump and Eye of the Tiger are, frankly, better than the originals.

Right, that’s everything I can thing of for now. I’m going to go make myself a big sandwich. By the time your read this, I’ll be settling down with two-slices of bread, some cheese and an unreasonably large amount of cranberry sauce. All the songs and bands in today’s entry are on Youtube, so go have a nosy. Until next time, peace out and fuck off!

[acesophiewalten]

Alrighty, folks. So, I was scrolling through tumblr one night when I found that Alastor apparently had a girlfriend.

This is what came of that.

♫♪.ılılıll|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|̲̅̅=̲̅̅|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|llılılı.♫♪

Before Death

♫♪.ılılıll|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|̲̅̅=̲̅̅|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|llılılı.♫♪

-Mimzy was born October 2nd, 1900, to German Mafia bosses that moved to New York.

-Her full name is Madeline Anna Vogel, however her childhood and demon nickname is Mimzy.

-Since she was a girl, she was left on her own a lot of the time, which she didn’t care much about.

-She can speak fluent German! She also tried to learn Spanish when she was a little older.

-She idolized the singers that would play downtown, she desperately wanted to be like them and even going so far as to write her favorite one and asking for an autograph. That autograph was what inspired her to pursue the arts in her life.

-She actually modeled for a little bit while she was in her early teens, but she ended up being the ‘before’ photo in a weight loss campaign.

-This sparked a sort of war on Mimzy’s body, and she was constantly on diets and trying to loose weight. And on top of that, a lot of people were turning down her singing because she needed to slim down to be on stage.

-She eventually got a very small job working the switchboards at a radio station, and eventually the producer moved her up to singing the slogan before the broadcasts started. She ended up falling head-over-heels in love with the main radio host, a man named Alastor. Which ended up with her not eating enough intentionally and trying to act a certain way, and that was the spark that got her into flapper styles. So some good came about this.

-And about when she started making friends who had this type of problem and a good support network to go with it, her family sprang onto her the fact that she was going to be in an arranged marriage. She was about 19-20.

-And what do you know it? She was getting married to Alastor!

-They started off pretty awkward at first, but they grew on each other. She really liked how cool he talked, and how tall he was. And that he liked picking her up.

-Oh right, Mimzy loves being picked up. Not all the time, but because she’s so short it’s nice to have a tall boyfriend who’s willing to pick you up to reach things put on high shelves.

-Being a Mafia member, she’s seen a good amount of killing in her life. So when she found out Alastor was murdering people she just kinda shrugged her shoulders and went on with her daily life.

-Mimzy has actually murdered three people herself. The first one was when she got in a traffic accident because Mimzy should literally not be allowed on the road, and she shot the guy who they crashed into and managed to pay off the cops so her and Alastor could get away clean. The second time she was in a sort of murder bet with her husband, because he’d found out she was up for killing people. She stabbed a guy in the throat before he could fight back, and then her third was basically that she was drunk and accidentally threw her pocket knife into someone’s stomach.

-She managed to build up her self-esteem after a while, which made her inclined to dressing up again and she eventually became a full-on flapper around 1924.

-Like I said before, she drives really crazy. Kit Snicket-level insane. Should not be allowed onto the road and should probably have license revoked. Never did.

-She loves children. Really loves children. She thinks they’re the absolute best and would love to hug them all at once. Unfortunately, her arms are too short for that.

-She has pet names for everyone except her family. Her friends are either ‘Doll’, ‘Honey,’ or ‘Sweetheart’, and Alastor is all three plus a whole lot more. One time she called him Doughnut.

-Speaking of doughnuts, she loves them, along with any other baked sweet. If it was up to her, the three main food groups, (the fourth is doughnuts in case you haven’t guessed) would be Cake Pops, Ice Cream, and Croissants.

-She died in the December of 1929. She was 29 and she was shot in the head as revenge against Alastor.

♫♪.ılılıll|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|̲̅̅=̲̅̅|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|llılılı.♫♪

After Death

♫♪.ılılıll|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|̲̅̅=̲̅̅|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|llılılı.♫♪

-So when she arrived in hell she kinda freaked out. For about a month, (hell time) she was just wandering around and wondering what to do with her new demon-hood.

-Eventually, she became a janitor in the daytime and tried to get that musical career up and running, and this time she had more desirable results.

-The club she performed in was called Prohibition. At first she was only a backup singer, but ended up making a steady run towards getting a solo, and in about a year (again, hell time) she managed to get regular solos in that club that payed reasonably well.

-Alastor was in hell for a while before Mimzy ever knew her husband was there. She just heard that some guy had immense power and he was called The Radio Demon and she steered herself away either consciously or subconsciously. I’m betting consciously.

-Mimzy met Nifty when she was on break from a show. They bumped into each other and Mimzy had a very strong urge to protecc. From then on they had almost a mother-and-daughter thing going on, even going so far as for Nifty to call her ‘Mother’ when she feels inclined.

-Eventually Mimzy and Alastor met up again, Alastor saw a sign advertising Mimzy’s show and he ended up going to see if it was actually her.

-So that’s when the nuclear family train really got rolling, and she basically had a husband and a daughter at this point.

-Still works at Prohibition, however once she found out the hotel was a thing she started working there for a while. She’s the entertainer and occasionally the greeter when Nifty’s out

-Mom friend. Once she got introduced to the Hazbins she basically became best mother 25/8 and made sure everyone’s clothes were free of wrinkles and they each had packed lunches.

-Once a bad cook, always a bad cook

-Hell has its own brand of makeup that she wears a lot, now that she’s dead arsenic and mercury can’t get her anymore

-So she found out what modern rock was when Vaggie came to hell and she hates most of it. However, some of her favorite songs are modern alternative because she thinks they’re really, really cool. Such songs include Ain’t No Rest For The Wicked by Cage The Elephant, Cry Baby by The Neighborhood, and, most recently, The Great Gatsby soundtrack. She loves electro swing and thinks it’s awesome, however nothing can beat original jazz for her.

-She can actually change her eye color at will! It was a little harder for her to control when she first got there, but now she can go from blue to purple whenever she wants.

And that’s all! Thank you for reading, and have a nice day!

Also, have a Mimzy x Alastor moodboard because fuck me, thank you for coming this far

[fieldsofplay]

Top Albums of 2019

Top Albums of 2019.

25.  William Tyler – Goes West

For those of you reading along, I want to thank you for sticking with this blog for basically an entire decade at this point. Jeez, where does the time* go? To that end, I’m gonna put out a decade list sometime next week, so to keep my sanity somewhat in check, this years tops list is going to be a little more abbreviated than usual. A few less records, a few less words, but still the same self indulgence you’ve come to know and expect.  To that end, William Tyler.  Tied for my favorite cover art with IGOR.  This is beautiful finger-picked cosmic acoustic guitar music with some nice flourishes added by Brad Cook and the usual suspects.  Perfect for fall days.  I accidentally heckled him at a concert about the Andy Griffith show, but I was only trying to say he shouldn’t be ashamed about liking that program.  The shame still haunts me, much like this music. *A fictional social construct

24.  Floating Points – Crush

Now I’m not going to sit here and pretend to know much about electronic music.  I don’t know the deep history, I don’t know the technical lingo, but like pornography, I know it when I hear it.  Much has been made about the impact opening for the XX and being limited to minimal gear while doing so had on Sam Shephard, and I’ll admit the differences from Elaenia is palpable.  Where that album felt minimal, Crush is maximal, bursting with colors and ideas, not unlike the beautiful painting that adorns its cover.  I never quite knew what the phrase Intelligent Dance Music was supposed to mean, but to me, that’s precisely what this is. You could dance to “LesAlpx” if you wanted, or you could just throw it on headphones and drift away to its unceasing pulse. Find you a man who can do both.

23.  Nerija – Blume

Let me be the first to tell you that jazz is back! Centering largely in London, there is thrilling music being made by the likes of Sons of Kemet, The Comet is Coming, and this year, by Nerija. Breathing new life into a long moribund form (at least until Kendrick Lamar started featuring jazz musicians on his albums), Blume literally does just that, unfurling jazz from a long dormancy.  While I’m not normally a fan of the guitar in jazz, here it keeps the whole thing moving forward, as the horns swirl around in a supportive role and the percussion cooks.  “Riverfest” is the best exemplar, as the guitar chimes with joy while the cymbal-crashes enliven the vibe.

22.  Florist – Emily Alone

A tale as old time (song as old as rhyme): member of ambient-electronic band puts out solo acoustic album, about the sadness of moving to LA and finding oneself.  No one is reinventing the wheel here, but I can’t help but feel little touches of Florist’s electronic full-band output in Emily Sprague’s solo record—the way the words repeat, subtly, but building meaning with each little phrasal repetition. Plus, the ocean is a recurring image, and dear lord do I miss the sea. If you want to listen a sad girl sing sad songs accompanied by acoustic guitar, you aren’t going to do better than Emily Alone this year.

21.  Kevin Morby – Oh My God

Possibly the best Kevin Morby record?  No one else would say that, but I will.  If so, why is it so far down the list? Well, when you consistently put out amazing records year-after-year it becomes difficult for any individual album to make an imprint on the “culture.” I think “Seven Devils” is possibly his finest tune.

20.  Sacred Paws – Run Around the Sun

My friend David turned me on to this band right before I was about to embark on a road trip up north in the middle of the summer, and let me tell you, that was the perfect time to first experience Run Around the Sun.  Noodly guitars burst out of every seam on this record, as bubblegum lyrics tie the whole shebang together.  If you ever wondered what the Shangri-las would sound like if Johnny Marr played lead guitar, I give you Sacred Paws.

19.  Jamila Woods – Legacy! Legacy!  

On Legacy! Legacy! Woods takes the R&B of the excellent Heavn and applies a jazzier sheen, to excellent results.  One need look no further than the track titles (“Frida,” “Miles,” “Basquiat,” “Baldwin,” “Sun Ra” etc.) to see that Woods is consciously engaging with the titans of history, and here, while she doesn’t exactly reach the heights of those innovators, she certainly begins to carve out a legacy of her own as one of the best voices in a currently thriving R&B scene.

18.  Mt. Eerie & Julie Doiron – Lost Wisdom, Pt. 2

On Lost Wisdom, Pt. 2 Phil Elverum (of The Microphones) and Julie Doiron (of Eric’s Trip) recapture the magic they bottled on the first Lost Wisdom back in 2008.  It is hard to imagine sparer music than this, but the duo make so much of a pair of voices and few plucked guitar or banjo lines.  As with all of his music of late (for obvious reasons), loss hangs all over Elverum’s output, but here, the loss is more mood and less of a literal presence (with the exception of the blistering “Widows”).  Few songs I can think of capture a single, specifically odd phenomenon quite like “When I Walk Out of the Museum.”

17.  DIIV – Deceiver

As capital-G guitar music recedes further into irrelevance, it’s good to still have a band like DIIV kicking around, who make shoegaze like it’s still 1991.  And it’s a good thing they are still making their beautiful walls of feedback, as heroine has repeatedly knocked this band off the rails of what appeared to be a very promising career.  This is ominous, portentous music, that swirls with white noise and black despair.  Shoegaze is premised on making beauty out of the squall of overdriven electric guitars, and DIIV make beauty of the squall of 21st century opiate addiction.

16.  Earl Sweatshirt – Feet of Clay

Earl continues the excellent experimentation of Some Rap Songs in the (slightly) more structured Feet of Clay.  Whereas Some Rap Songs felt like fragments, the tracks on Feet of Clay (almost) feel like “songs” proper.  Earl continues to quickly sweep the ground out from underneath you, whether it’s in the form of oddly woozy backing tracks that can’t really be called “beats” or the sub 2-minute run times, but he seems to pack slightly more structure into those abbreviated entrants, even if there are a lot less of them than there were on Some Rap Songs.  Right now no one is pushing the boundaries of hip-hop like Earl, and each new release, even if the total run time is under 15 minutes, is a thrilling event.

15.  Better Oblivion Community Center – S/T

Yes, last year I had Boygenius as my number one record, but if I’m being frank, and I am, this is the better collaborative album put out by Phoebe Bridgers.  At first blush a record between the up-and-coming Bridgers and the largely has-been Conor Oberst seems like a desperate grab at continued relevance by the latter, but having seen them live, I must admit the pairing makes perfect sense.  The energy between the two is infectious, and while they share a common fascination with emo, they really draw the best out of each other.  Bridgers plays the Emmylou Harris role from I’m Wide Awake It’s Morning to perfection, and Oberst plays the Kenny Rodgers in “Islands in the Stream.”  For a period I could not turn on Radio K without hearing a song from this album, which is strange because, as a college radio station, every hour is usually completely different.

14.  Chromatics – Closer to Grey

In a certain way, Chromatics are victims of their own tendency towards self-mythologizing.  Their last two official albums were absolutely perfect slices of Italo-Disco, equal parts late night ennui and seething dancefloor longing.  There was way more guitar on those albums than most anyone would appreciate on first glance, and yet Ruth Radelet’s smoky vocals were unquestionably the star.  In the interim Johnny Jewel (the mastermind behind the band and basically everything on Italians Do it Better) famously destroyed all the copies of the long teased Dear Tommy after a near death experience, provided essential music to Twin Peaks: The Return (which included multiple Chromatics performances at the dear Road House), and then suddenly dropped Closer to Grey out of the sky, with neither warning nor fanfare.  This record is everything you would want a Chromatics record to be, but perhaps that is part of the reason it didn’t really make a major impression. It felt a little Chromatics-by-the-numbers, right down to the cover of “The Sound of Silence” to open it up.  I absolutely love this album, and if it weren’t for the incredible quality of albums put out this year, it would certainly be a top-10 or top-5 in any other year (hell, in the terrible-for-music 2018 it would have been number one by a mile).  Perhaps the biggest frustration is just how fucking good “Light as a Feather” is.  It hints at a version of Chromatics influenced by Portishead, and now that’s all I want more of.

13.  Thom Yorke – ANIMA

Doubt it if you will, you sneering youngsters, but Thom Yorke and his more well-known band are currently making some of the best music of their careers.  Just as A Moon Shaped Pool was a much needed return to form after the completely forgettable King of Limbs, with ANIMA Yorke gets back to what made The Eraser so compelling all the way back in 2006.  While a fondness for Aphex Twin is no longer at all exceptional in rock music in 2019, it was in 2006, and with ANIMA, Yorke gets back to the creepy, clicky, paranoid distrust of modern consumer culture that is solidly his wheelhouse.  Bonus points for using Netflix and a pairing with PTA to make America care about a long form music video again in 2019.

12.  Black Marble – Bigger than Life

I would call black Marble my favorite new band of the year, but the thing is, they aren’t new, just new to me.  Bigger than Life is their third record, and first for Sacred Bones (whose distinctive album art is what first caught my eye).  Because their music is comprised solely of arpeggiated synths, melodic bass, and clinking drum machines, overlaid with melancholicly narrow vocals, it is easy to accuse Black Marble of being a little same-y.  However, if you, like me, worship at the temple of New Order, than this is the band for you.  I have lived with their three extant albums the last couple months (the second, It’s Immaterial, being my favorite), and in reality, this is really the only music I want to listen to.

11.  Big Thief – U.F.O.F. / Two Hands

If you’re reading this than you likely already know how much I love Big Thief, and you might be a little surprised that one, if not both, of the records they put out this year is not sitting atop this list based on how much I’ve professed my love for this band over the course of 2019.  So here’s the thing, the highs on both of these albums--“U.F.O.F.” “Not”--are better than anything else anyone has done this year, but to my ear both records suffer from a flew blah-ish passages that prevent either album, on its own, from achieving top status.  However, if you borrow a few tracks here (Cattails, Contact) and a few tracks there (Shoulders, Two Hands) and made one album out of the highlights of both sessions, you would unquestionably have the album of the year.  That Big Thief gave us two records brimming with amazing folk rock ideas is a blessing.

10.  Sharon Van Etten – Remind Me Tomorrow

Hey, do you remember Sharon Van Etten put out an amazing record in 2019? I bet you don’t.  The culture moves so fast these days that albums from January might as well have been released five years ago, and it seems to me like this record slipped off a few peoples’ radars as the year progressed, which is a shame, considering how damn good it is (her best imho).  There are few runs on an album I’ve enjoyed more this year than “Jupiter 4’s” electro-throb into “Seventeen’s” Springsteen chug into “Malibu’s” comedown.  Bonus points for being my dear friend Hadley’s downstairs neighbor for all those years.  Ah Brooklyn, how I miss thee.

9.  Black Midi – Schlagenheim

Yes, that most reliable of music-critic tropes: the hot young band from London.  Black Midi made waves with a legendary youtube video of their live show, and having seen it in person, let me tell you, even that now infamous video doesn’t do them justice.  Much like its gobldy-gook made up title, Schlagenheim is an amalgamation of strands of music that don’t really fit together but somehow they pull off with aplomb.  At times they play with the hardcore fury of Minor Threat, while at others the proggy interconnectivity of Rush at their most arena-rockish, all with a weird dash of David Byrne wiry energy holding it all together.  If they come to your town, go see them, just don’t stand in the front unless you want to be swept into the maelstrom.

8.  Helado Negro – This is How You Smile

Did you love Little Joy (the Strokes sideproject) but wish it was occasionally electronic and periodically in Spanish? If so, I give you Helado Negro. This is the prettiest record of the year; it never goes above a certain emotional register / decibel range, but it inhabits the spectrum in which it lives like a ghost in its occasional electronic flourishes.  This is a record for someone with a long drive with something to think about. “Seen my Aura” is simultaneously funky and restrained, acoustic and electronic, and emblematic of the joys of This is How You Smile.

7.  Sturgill Simpson – Sound & Fury

Each of Sturgill Simpson’s last three records have been fundamentally different from one another, and each has been excellent, which is almost impossible to accomplish.  Metamodern Sounds in Country Music introduced many, like myself, to a new voice in an often overlooked medium, A Sailor’s Guide to Earth dusted off the horns from Elvis’s stax-era and romped around, and now with Sound & Fury Sturgill looks to the outlaw tradition (and ZZ freakin Top) he’s so-often been associated with, but rarely resembled, to crank out an incredible record that is far more “rock” than it is “country.” Throw on a heaping of 80’s-era Springsteen synths and you have the recipe for a record that makes me very, very happy.  The two halves of “Make Art not Friends” have little business coexisting within a single track (the first half sounds like Tangerine Dream, the second half Arcade Fire) and yet it is precisely in this tenuous cohabitation that Sturgill has produced his best record to date.

6.  Vampire Weekend – Father of the Bride

Vampire Weekend started out their career being accused of stealing from Graceland and ended up becoming Paul Simon.  Funny how that works out sometimes.  Modern Vampires of the City has become, next to Sound of Silver, the definitive record about life in New York during my era (2005-2016).  On the follow up, the band, newly shorn of Rostam Batmanglij (whose solo record is also phenomenal, even though he’s maybe one of the worst performers I’ve ever seen), decamped to California, and Father of the Bride revels in both the California sun and a well earned sense of accomplishment.  “Hold You Now” is my favorite song of the year, it is simply stunning.

5.  Bill Callahan – Shepherd in a Sheepskin Vest

There is a bit of theme developing here at the top of the list: established artists putting out arguably their best work deep into storied careers, and no one on this list is deeper into a more storied oeuvre than Bill Callahan.  Between Smog and under his own name, Callahan has been releasing consistently great albums since 1992, and to me, Shepherd in a Sheepskin Vest is his finest work to date.  Having found domestic bliss, so the press materials state, Callahan is content to sit back and let that world-weary baritone spin out all the comforts of a well-worn chair near a fire in a hearth.  This is the type of record that gives you hope that happiness isn’t the exclusive provenance of the young.

4.  Purple Mountains – Purple Mountains

If I were to really sit and write out all of my thoughts about David Berman this blurb would probably be 10 pages long, at least, so rather than spill a bunch of digital ink lamenting the loss of a true inspiration, I’ll just try and stick to the album itself, which is almost impossible now in the wake of his suicide shortly after its release.  Even on first blush this was a difficult hang, clearly the product of someone who lost their wife to a series of poor decisions / mental difficulties, and who hadn’t come to terms with it.  Understandably so.  Berman remains endlessly quotable, right up to the very end, and “we’re just drinking margaritas at the mall” remains emblematic of his ability to compress the tedium of middle american misery into a single haunting, yet, hilarious, image.  While “Nights that Won’t Happen” lives on as his suicide note directly to the fans (“The dead know what they’re doing when they leave this world behind” ; “all the suffering gets done by the ones we leave behind”), and it is hauntingly beautiful, it still makes me cry every time I hear it. As does most of this record. So the song I’ll carry on with me, and can still actually listen to, is “Snow is Falling in Manhattan.” Just a beautiful song from a beautiful man.  

3.  Tyler, the Creator – IGOR

I really don’t have the words (well, clearly I have some) to express just how impressed I am by the arc of Tyler’s career.  The one-time shock-rap flash in the critical pan quickly turned into forgettable homophobe who perfectly fit a description of Eminem’s fan base I once heard: kids who call their mom a bitch to their face.  The first startling change came with Flower Boy, which came right on the heels of his step out of the closet.  Flower Boy is a really great record, but it still largely sounded like Tyler, just a more mature version who stopped saying cringe worthy shit.  IGOR is something entirely different.  I honestly don’t even know what to call it. It’s not a rap record, and there are honestly entire tracks on it where I’m not sure what it is he does on them, but my god, this thing is incredible.  It’s basically a Parliament album for the end of the world, and if the earth is going to burn down around us, we might as well dance our way out, which is precisely the party Tyler has orchestrated here.  I cannot wait to see what he does next.

2.  Angel Olsen – All Mirrors

All Mirrors isn’t just clearly Angel Olsen’s best album by a clear margin, it is the best pop album made by anyone in sometime.  Just like black clothes make anyone a little slimmer, orchestration can make any pop song sound symphonic, but most pop acts don’t have the power of Angel Olson’s voice to match the bombast of the string section and percussion.  It feels like the term Beatlesesque has started to fade from the critical lexicon, but this music is truly akin to the orchestral richness of “I am the Walrus” or “A Day in the Life.”  People celebrate Lana del Ray for her torch songs (and I really liked Norman Fucking Rockwell, even if it didn’t quite make this list in a stacked year) but no one carries a torch like Angel Olsen.  I was initially reticent to catch her live show this tour, it was on a weeknight, it was cold, I had to go downtown, I’d seen her a couple times already, yadda yadda yadda, but I knew deep down I really wanted to see if she could recreate the power of these songs on stage (the inverse of how that equation usually goes).  Reader: she did.

1.  (Sandy) Alex G – House of Sugar

House of Sugar may not be quite as experimental as IGOR, or as pop-perfect as All Mirrors, but it takes those two impulses and melds them together into what is my favorite album of the year, even if strictly speaking it may not be the “best” as measured against the other entrants in this top 3.  “Hope” was actually a “hit” song on the local college radio station, and understandably so; it sounds like Elliott Smith and tells a comprehensible story about a friend who died from an overdose.  But “Hope” is jut one facet of House of Sugar, which is a veritable hall of musical mirrors.  “Walk Away” is hypnotic in its repetitions, “In My Arms” is a legit straightforward acoustic love song, “Sugar” sounds like The Knife (no joke), “Sugarhouse” could have been on The River, and while I already said “Hold You Now” is my favorite song of the year, “Gretel” has something to say about that.  I saw a show right when this album came out, and as the band left the stage for the final time the soundguy cued up “Gretel” not, I’m guessing, because the band requested it, but because it rules and he just wanted to share it with everyone as they receded into night.

[savetopnow]

2018-04-07 00 CELEBRITY now

CELEBRITY

E!

Prince Harry and Meghan Markle Are an Adorable Sporty Pair at Invictus Games UK Trials

Dax Shepard and Zach Braff Are Practically Identical in This Face-Swapped Photo

Could a Felicity Revival Be Taking Shape After the ATX TV Festival Reunion? Keri Russell Says...

Teen Mom's Kailyn Lowry Poses Nearly Nude in Jamaica for #BodyPositive Photo

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Has Begun Hinting at Infinity War--All the Times It's Crossed Over With the MCU

Hollywood Life

Conor McGregor In Handcuffs: 1st Photo Of UFC Champ After He Was Arrested For Wild NYC Rampage

Rihanna Wore The Same Product On Her Eyes, Lips & Cheeks At Fenty Beauty Launch In Milan

Kris Jenner Wants Chris Brown To Write Wendy Williams Diss Track But Kim’s Holding Her Back

Michelle Obamas Compares Trump To Bad Parents: ‘Now We Can Stay Up Late & Not Follow The Rules’

‘Quantico’ Season 3 Trailer: Did Alex & Ryan Break Up? — Watch

Media Take Out

Desiigner Caught Taking A PIZZ On Someone’s House!! (PICS)

Comedian Sinbad Appears To Be SNITCHING On Russell Simmons . . . Says ‘MORE WOMEN’ Are Gonna Come Out With RAPE Claims!!!

Shirley Strawberry From Teh STEVE HARVEY RADIO SHOW . . . Is Being Sued . . . For Being a ‘DEADBEAT’!!

People

Here's the (Budget-Friendly!) Bubbly Harry and Meghan Are Likely to Toast with at Their Wedding!

Why Emily Blunt Doesn’t Think A Devil Wears Prada Sequel Is A Good Idea

Kendra Wilkinson Takes Son to L.A. Kings Hockey Game Amid Hank Baskett Separation

All About the Yodeling Walmart Kid the Internet Is Obsessed With (and More Amazingly Talented Kids)

Michelle Obama Likens President Trump to a Negligent Parent Who Lets Their Kids 'Eat Candy All Day'

Perez Hilton

Emails Show Duffer Brothers Did NOT Rip Off Stranger Things!

Teen Mom 2's Kailyn Lowry Poses Nearly Nude In Jamaica!

Twitter Reacts To Cardi B's Debut Album Invasion Of Privacy — Did She Finally Address Those Pregnancy Rumors??

Lorde Apologizes For Making Whitney Houston Bathtub Reference On Instagram: 'I'm An Idiot'

Kylie Jenner's Baby Girl Stormi Is A Literal Sleeping Angel!!

Popsugar

Prince Harry and Meghan Markle's Latest Outing Is Giving Us Flashbacks to Their First Appearance

So, Brad Pitt Reportedly Has a New "Fascinating" Lady Friend in His Life

5 Ways Michelle Obama Is Still Working Her Ass Off in 2018

Eggs, Bunnies, and Chocolate! Here's How Your Favorite Stars Celebrated Easter This Year

Kurt Russell and Goldie Hawn's Modern Family Is Absolutely Golden

Reddit Entertainment

‘Roseanne’ is a smash. But what happens when a network’s biggest star is also its most controversial?

The fallout since the Weinstein scandal first rocked Hollywood

Amazon books five seasons for ‘Lord of the Rings’ series, which could cost up to $1B

Cardi B’s ‘Invasion of Privacy’ Name Drops Beyonce's 'Lemonade' in a Song About Cheating

[Article in Japanese] Co-founder of Studio Ghibli, Isao Takahata, has passed away

TMZ

Conor McGregor Leaves Police Station In Handcuffs

Cardi B's Outfit Barely Hides Pregnancy at Album Release Party

'Stranger Things' Duffer Brothers Have Proof They Didn't Steal Show Idea

Muhammad Ali's Robe from Historic 'Phantom Punch' Fight to Hit Auction Block

Meek Mill Gets Prison Visit from 76ers Star Rookies

The Shade Room

Conor McGregor Turns Himself In To Police After Injuring Other UFC Fighters With A Dolly

Kyrie Irving Opens Up About Knee Infection & Having To Sit Out For The Rest Of The Season

Virginia Man Who Fatally Punched Woman For Calling Him The N-Word Found Guilty Of Second Degree Murder

Nas Claims Kelis Violated Custody Agreement For Keeping Son During Passover

Cardi B Responds To Those Pregnancy Rumors!

Us Weekly

Dua Lipa Jumps on the Short Haircut Bandwagon

Sammi Shades ‘Jersey Shore: Family Vacation’ During Premiere

Celebrities’ Biggest Social Media Fails

Who Needs Athleisure When You Can Bathleisure at Home?

Lorde Apologizes for Posting Bathtub Photo With Whitney Houston Lyrics

[m0rgansux]

200: My crush’s name is: I guess I have a crush on Justin

199: I was born in: North Carolina

198: I am really: Sad

197: My cellphone company is: AT&T

196: My eye color is: Blue

195: My shoe size is: 7 ish

194: My ring size is: I have no idea something between 6 and 8 maybe

193: My height is: 5′ 9 1/2′’

192: I am allergic to: Ants I think and maybe the sun

191: My 1st car was: A 2007 Kia Rondo

190: My 1st job was: Selling Avon

189: Last book you read: Wishful Drinking by Carrie Fisher

188: My bed is: COMFY

187: My pet: s are cool I have a lot

186: My best friend: K8 bc no one else likes me

185: My favorite shampoo is: Organix

184: Xbox or ps3: I haven’t played either 

183: Piggy banks are: CUTE

182: In my pockets: Nothing 

181: On my calendar: Birthdays, cat rabies dates, appointments, work schedule 

180: Marriage is: NEAT

179: Spongebob can: Eat my ass 

178: My mom: is a cool lady 

177: The last three songs I bought were: I use apple music so I don’t buy songs but the last 3 I downloaded were  We Don’t Talk Anymore (feat. Selena Gomez) - Charlie Puth Just a Dream - Nelly Airplanes Pt 2. (Feat. Eminem and Hayley Williams) - BoB ....don’t judge me ok I was havin a time last night 

176: Last YouTube video watched: An analysis of an episode of Black Mirror 

175: How many cousins do you have? 0

174: Do you have any siblings? I have a brother and sister 

173: Are your parents divorced? No

172: Are you taller than your mom? Like 4 or 5 inches 

171: Do you play an instrument? I played the violin up until a couple years ago 

170: What did you do yesterday? Cleaned out cages at petsmart 

[I BELIEVE IN….]

169: Love at first sight: Idk fam

168: Luck: I don’t think so 

167: Fate: No

166: Yourself: No

165: Aliens: Yes

164: Heaven: I don’t know

163: Hell: No

162: God: I don’t know

161: Horoscopes: Maybe

160: Soul mates: No

159: Ghosts: Maybe

158: Gay Marriage: Yes???

157: War: No

156: Orbs: I don’t think so 

155: Magic: No

[THIS OR THAT]

154: Hugs or Kisses: Hugs

153: Drunk or High: High

152: Phone or Online: Phone

151: Red heads or Black haired: Both

150: Blondes or Brunettes: Brunettes

149: Hot or cold: Cold

148: Summer or winter: Winter

147: Autumn or Spring: Autumn

146: Chocolate or vanilla: Vanilla

145: Night or Day: Night

144: Oranges or Apples: Apples

143: Curly or Straight hair: Curly

142: McDonalds or Burger King: McDonalds

141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: White

140: Mac or PC: PC

139: Flip flops or high heels: Flip flops 

138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: Do u mean like ugly personality bc obviously I’m going to go for sweet and poor

137: Coke or Pepsi: Pepsi

136: Hillary or Obama: Obama

135: Buried or cremated: I......don’t know

134: Singing or Dancing: Singing

133: Coach or Chanel: I don’t care

132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: Oh my GOD Chris Daughtry 

131: Small town or Big city: Big city 

130: Wal-Mart or Target: Target 

129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: It depends on the movie 

128: Manicure or Pedicure: Pedicure 

127: East Coast or West Coast: Both??

126: Your Birthday or Christmas: Christmas 

125: Chocolate or Flowers: Flowers 

124: Disney or Six Flags: Disney

123: Yankees or Red Sox: I don’t care at all 

[HERE’S WHAT I THINK ABOUT]

122: War: UH WHAT IS IT GOOD FOR  ABSOLUTELY NOTHIN

121: George Bush: He’s a fucking monkey 

120: Gay Marriage: I support it

119: The presidential election: Sad and disappointing 

118: Abortion: Pro-choice 

117: MySpace: It died like 500 years ago 

116: Reality TV: I don’t like it except for The Voice sometimes 

115: Parents: They neat

114: Back stabbers: ....they suck???

113: Ebay: It’s kinda dead tbh 

112: Facebook: Moms use it too much 

111: Work: Cute dogs and a cute boy 

110: My Neighbors: I don’t know them but they’ve waved at us before 

109: Gas Prices: I wish they were lower 

108: Designer Clothes: I shop at H&M and Target 

107: College: Waste of my time and money 

106: Sports: I don’t care about sports 

105: My family: They’re nice but I need a break from them sometimes 

104: The future: How dare u ask me about that 

[LAST TIME I….]

103: Hugged someone: It’s been like 50 million years 

102: Last time you ate: A few minutes ago 

101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: A couple days ago 

100: Cried in front of someone: DUDE LIKE NEVER 

99: Went to a movie theater: A couple months ago

98: Took a vacation: It’s been like 3 years 

97: Swam in a pool: It’s been like 5 years 

96: Changed a diaper: It’s been like 7 years omg 

95: Got my nails done: About a month ago

94: Went to a wedding: 2011

93: Broke a bone: Never 

92: Got a piercing: Last March

91: Broke the law: Probably within the last week 

90: Texted: A few minutes ago 

89: Who makes you laugh the most: K8

88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: My cats bc I can’t take them all 

87: The last movie I saw: I don’t remember 

86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: Nothing

85: The thing I’m not looking forward to: MY LIFE

84: People call me: Morgan :\\\

83: The most difficult thing to do is: A lot of things

82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: Once

81: My zodiac sign is: Leo

80: The first person i talked to today was: Probably my dad

79: First time you had a crush: Kindergarten 

78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: No one :)

77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: Probably today??

76: Right now I am talking to: No one

75: What are you going to do when you grow up: Lol who knows

74: I have/will get a job: I’m a cashier

73: Tomorrow: I’m going to breakfast with Angelica, then the dentist

72: Today: I did nothing

71: Next Summer: I don’t even know 

70: Next Weekend: Working or doing nothing 

69: I have these pets: 15 cats and a turtle

68: The worst sound in the world: I hate Styrofoam squeaking sounds 

67: The person that makes me cry the most is: MEEEE

66: People that make you happy: NO ONE

65: Last time I cried: Today

64: My friends are: NEAT

63: My computer is: FINE BUT I DON’T USE IT

62: My School: I graduated 

61: My Car: A 2007 Kia Rio

60: I lose all respect for people who: Yell at cashiers 

59: The last movie I cried at was: Who knows 

58: Your hair color is: Red

57: TV shows you watch: Criminal Minds, New Girl, Family Guy, Parks and Rec

56: Favorite web site: Tumblr or Youtube

55: Your dream vacation: A vacation in general 

54: The worst pain I was ever in was: BRUH I DON’T KNOW 

53: How do you like your steak cooked: I don’t know honestly 

52: My room is: A cross between a young adult hipster’s room and an emo teenager’s room

51: My favorite celebrity is: Matthew Gray Gubler sure

50: Where would you like to be: In my bed 

49: Do you want children: No

48: Ever been in love: No

47: Who’s your best friend: k8

46: More guy friends or girl friends: I have 2 friends and they’re both girls 

45: One thing that makes you feel great is: Attention

44: One person that you wish you could see right now: NONE OF UR BUSINESS

43: Do you have a 5 year plan: I don’t even have a 5 month plan

42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: Yeah but who knows where it went

41: Have you pre-named your children: NO EW

40: Last person I got mad at: Dominique 

39: I would like to move to: Anywhere else 

38: I wish I was a professional: Cat petter 

[MY FAVORITES….]

37: Candy: Sour patch kids 

36: Vehicle: I don’t have one

35: President: I am not educated enough to answer this 

34: State visited: New York

33: Cellphone provider: Not AT&T

32: Athlete: None

31: Actor: My mind is blanking

30: Actress: ^^^

29: Singer: Brendon Urie maybe 

28: Band: Fall Out Boy

27: Clothing store: H&M

26: Grocery store: Whole Foods 

25: TV show: Criminal Minds 

24: Movie: Scream, 13 Going on 30

23: Website: U have def asked this already 

22: Animal: Cats

21: Theme park: I have only been to Carrowinds and Busch Gardens 

20: Holiday: Christmas 

19: Sport to watch: None

18: Sport to play: NONE

17: Magazine: I haven’t read a magazine in 45 years 

16: Book: I literally just forgot every book I’ve ever read 

15: Day of the week: I don’t have one 

14: Beach: I don’t like the beach 

13: Concert attended: PATD or Monumentour 

12: Thing to cook: Desserts 

11: Food: Sushi

10: Restaurant: Blue Asia 

9: Radio station: Modern rock 98.7

8: Yankee candle scent: Idk fam I like incense-y kinda smells 

7: Perfume: I just got a trio of Nest perfumes and I really like those right now 

6: Flower: Roses???

5: Color: Black

4: Talk show host: None of them

3: Comedian: Bo Burnham

2: Dog breed: Pittbull 

1: Did you answer all these truthfully? Who knows there were so many questions I don’t even remember,