#rachel amber fan club

[amber-jinx]

Omg exactly. Really glad to see people on the same page. So many people fail to understand Rachel Amber, just like people in the games. I'm also sick of people throwing the word "manipulative" around. Having high Emotional Intelligence & superb people skills does NOT equal to manipulation (which is deliberately using people to your advantage)!!! Of course when you have the talent to get on peoples good side you do it, because she's an amazing, caring person! This is said in the comics as well by Chloe, like she was a ray of sunshine.

Ultimately Chloe is the one who remained in Rachel's heart. She cared about Frank as she has the ability to see humanity/beauty even in darkness, but was with him likely cuz of drug addiction / making money to leave town. She didn't cheat because 1st, Chloe & Rachel were never officially together, plus she left Frank immediately when he got violent. Contrast this with "Chloe could never piss her off, she and Rachel were almost joint in the head" as said by Joyce herself. The amount of difference in these 2 relationships are so clear.

As for Jefferson, she was infatuated and when she realised it wasn't healthy, it was too late. Wasn't love, wasn't cheating. She got preyed on. So why didn't she tell Chloe? Well, would you find it easy to elaborate in detail, to someone you really care about, about your ugly side? This is why we lie to our mother, sometimes. We don't want them to hate us (exactly what Rach wrote in that note to Chloe-- "I don't want you to hate me"). She clearly isn't proud of what she got herself into and didn't know how to tell Chloe. But she tried. She wrote that note. Whether she actually gave Chloe is left for our interpretation, as with so many things in Life is Strange.

It's so sad. If she just waited to get a degree she could have left town with Chlo for good. Rach holds a piece of my heart & I hope to travel around with her feather earring.

Rachel Amber deserves more love, respect and sympathy.

Also people should learn to see the Ying AND Yang of a character. Not just overly focused on either sides. Maturing is realising Rachel is toxic? no. That's not maturing. Maturing is recognizing both sides and still believing in someone's humanity because we need to have a little faith.

2nd image by AI.

Before playing Before the Storm, I honestly didn’t think I would have so many feelings about Rachel Amber but oh boy, here we are.

I just want to start off by saying that I am a Rachel defender through and through. I will die on this hill. Call me Chloe Price because I am president of the Rachel Amber fan club. 

The belief that Rachel had no care or compassion for Chloe and was only using her is insane to me. We are talking about a 15 year old girl who feels like she has to be everything for everyone all the time while still maintaining perfect grades and a perfect reputation. She has a broken family with a father who is a master manipulator so of COURSE Rachel knows how to manipulate, it’s all she’s ever learned and she thinks that’s how you have to move through life. Chloe is the first person she’s ever met that she could maybe be real with and she doesn’t know how to handle that emotionally. She does love Chloe, she just doesn’t know how to show it very well because it’s never been demonstrated to her.

When talking about Rachel, I think we need to remember that she is a victim, right up until she was buried, and even during her burial, she was victimized. Even her body could not get the peace it deserved. 

Firstly, she was 100% a victim of her family. The mother who was sick and couldn’t recover for her until it was too late, the mother who lived a lie Rachel’s entire life and didn’t have the heart to say anything, the father who demonized a hurt woman and refused to get her help, who kept a part of his daughter away from herself, and who would rather hire a hitman to kill her real mother than actually allow them to meet. Say what you want about him doing what he believed was best, he was still wrong.

She was a victim of Frank. I have a lot of mixed feelings regarding Frank in general, however I do believe that this is another case of Rachel being victimized. I’ve seen a lot of “Why would she cheat on Chloe with Frank?” online and it’s baffling. Are we forgetting that Frank is a fully grown adult who is 13 years her senior? Regardless if they started dating after she turned 18 (which we do not know for sure is the case), he still met AND liked her when she was 15 years old (considering in BtS, if you tell Frank over the phone that you’re helping a friend, he asks if it was your friend from the other night at the mill, and agrees to help only because of her). In the diner during the storm, he does acknowledge that she was too young for him, but that he did genuinely care about her, which I don’t doubt, but the relationship is inappropriate regardless. The relationship also likely started because she was a user and running drugs for him as a means to make money to leave town with Chloe, who he believed was “trying to take her away from him,” a sentiment that is common within grooming.

She was a victim of Jefferson, having been coerced into whatever their relationship was, her feelings for him being self-described as “obsessed”. She never truly loved him, only being manipulated into it because she was young and desperately needed a father figure-esque man to make her feel worth something. All he really was was an adult who wanted to do disgusting things to a child.

And lastly, she was a victim of Nathan, who she gave years of friendship to, but he was so broken and so blinded by pleasing his so-called mentor that he allowed her to die and left her in a junkyard like she was garbage.

Rachel was a just baby who was crying for help ever since she moved to Arcadia Bay, and the only one who could hear her was Chloe. Unfortunately, despite doing everything she could, Chloe was also a child who was dealing with her own trauma. She couldn’t always be at Rachel’s side to protect her, and Rachel was scared to tell her the truth in fear of losing her. No one was able to step in to give Rachel what she needed, and she continued to escalate, lash out, and put herself in more and more danger until it led to her death.

[spaceorphan18]

And Here's What You Really Missed : Amber Riley & Rhodes Not Taken

Hey! I'm back with another recap...

The first podcast was the interview with Amber Riley. Honestly, it was short, and more so to congratulate Amber on her win on Masked Singer. (Which she deserved, the girl is phenomenal.) They talk mostly about that -- and Amber opens up about how validating these things can be. And how happy she is in her life. Kevin and Jenna, rightfully, lavish her with praise.

Amber also mentions that she's glad that Kevin and Jenna are doing the podcast -- it reminds her of what Glee did for her, and how it wasn't all bad. They all talk, again, about just how tiring it was -- but Amber discusses how grateful she is for the show, how Kevin and Jenna are bringing back happy memories, and that she's in a good place in general. (Yay!)

Also - heads up, she and Chris did show called Name That Tune that will be out on Jan. 11th. And apparently (and unsurprisingly) Chris's competitive side comes out.

***

The episode recap for the week is Rhodes Not Taken.

-A lot of the conversation is based around Kristen Chenoweth as a star. It was a big moment for them as a show -- she was the first real big name that they had showcased on the show. Not only was she a big deal - but she was one of the warmest and sweetest people they had - and it helped shape them in their professional lives.

[I think it's kind of cool that the sentiment around Chenoweth has always been that she's such a sweetheart. It's reflected in the conversation they had with her on their previous podcast, and every time she's brought up - there's nothing but nice things said. That's she's great professional as well as a good person.]

-Jenna and Chris, being huge Broadway fans, were especially excited about her being on set. They came up with a codeword for her - cupcake - for when she was coming near.

-Last Name was a real struggle to get through. The cast wasn't getting it, and the floor was slippery, so they kept sliding around. (They poured pop on the floor in order to stop them from slipping.) They had to take an extra day of rehearsal, which was unheard of, because the cast was struggling so much.

-Chenoweth came in and was so professional she was able to get the dance they'd been working on for weeks in less than an hour - which amazed them all.

-They somewhat recap how April gets into the Glee club, with not a whole lot of commentary - other than they more or less enjoyed it. (Which is great for them - this episode bores me to tears, even if I recognize how brilliant Kristen Chenoweth is in it.)

-There's an interesting side story where Kevin talks about, much later in the series, debating Jayma as to who is the more expensive extra -- and how the two of them would often point out their one or two lines, and see if they'd get cut.

-Kevin has a lot of praise for Maybe This Time (which I agree with). He says that not only is it brilliant duet, but is a first time for the glee kids to hear what real professionalism sounds like.

-Jenna recounts working with Chenoweth in her one scene where April is teaching them how to steal things. She had a great time working on that scene, and she says she and Amber remember that fondly.

-They discuss the second-ish plot line surrounding Finn being somewhat manipulative of Rachel for the betterment of the glee club. They say it seems a little extreme -- but they both note the natural chemistry between the two of them. (I find this fascinating, tbh, while I do think Finchel is actually super cute in this episode -- I'm curious as to what they'll think of the Finchel story as it goes along.)

-Kevin points out that Naya has some hilarious background moments. It's something that he's always looking for.

-They praise the Will/April duet - Alone, a song that shouldn't work, but totally does.

-They also praise the infamous Kurt being drunk moment with Emma.

-[Okay, so there's a throwaway comment done by Kevin where he states that Ian is the master of being creative about people's physical features. And... I'm just noting it because Ian is responsible for a lot of the mean, physical jabs the cast get over the years. I'll be interested to see how they respond to it. also - they'd like to get Ian on the show at some point.]

-They talk about the choir room scenes, and how this is the first episode where they're all together as a cast. (They talk about this episode being a lot of firsts in a lot of ways -- and that's why it's so memorable to them.) They also talk about how the shooting of these kinds of scenes took forever, since there were twelve or so cast members, and they had to do a take for each of their reactions shots. They often lived in the choir room -- and this is when the cast really bonded as a whole.

-They have a lot of love and a lot of personal feelings for Somebody to Love. It's special since they sang it so often, and it was the first song where the entire cast was there to do it together. Another big bonding moment for them as a cast.

-They used to tease Cory about his opening of the song.

-Both Kevin and Amber were nervous about their parts in the studio recording. Kevin's favorite singer is Freddy Mercury, and it was hard to emulate someone he looked up to. Meanwhile, Amber was nervous -- but was given the freedom to play around with the song.

-The song felt like the first performance number they did that really clicked. It didn't take them as long to learn it, and it was a magical moment for the cast.

Cringiest Moment : smuggling the meat between their legs.

Worst Dance: Last Name (various people at varying points.)

Best Song: Somebody to Love for sentimental reasons.

Best Line: 'Oh Bambi, I cried so hard when those hunters shot your mommy.'

Best Performance by a Prop: April's Pink Wine Glass

Things that did and didn't age well: They think that all of it aged pretty well. [Hmmm, I'm not entirely sure I agree -- but overall, I wonder if their sentiment for the episode is coloring things a bit.]

TikTok: Kevin brings up that Pitch Perfect did a bit where they mentioned songs ruined by Glee -- and how that's a meme on TikTok. They didn't really do examples or anything -- and more so just point out that Glee is often mentioned in media, and he gets shown that on TikTok a lot.

[sillyname30]

I rewatched Extraordinary Merry Christmas, the two deleted scenes and the bts videos in preparation for the next recap episode.

Rachel gives Finn a wish-list and is really pushing it.

Sue is volunteering at the Lima homeless shelter. She wants the glee club pitch in by giving the gift of song. (Blaine's first scene in Sue's office.)

The local station manager of Lima's PBS wants the Glee club to do a holiday special with Artie as director. Artie agrees and wants it to be inspired be The Star Wars Holiday Special and a hommage to the Judy Garland Christmas Show.

The taping of the show is at the same time as the Homeless shelter thing and only Sam and Quinn show up for that. The rest of the New Directions come later to the shelter, but only because their last number was cut.

Cringe moment: Sue: Wheels, Procelain, other gay.  Sue called Blaine later young Burt Reynolds which is more a compliment than an insult. In season six we learn Sue is a Klaine fan.

best song: It's an impossible choice. I can say that I'm happy Darren had 2 duets and  a part in My Favorite Things. And I want to mention that River is on his Christmas album.

best dance move: Christmas Wrapping

performance mvp: Chris, Darren, Lea and Amber in the Christmas Special. They all managed to talk and perform like this show was really from the 60's. (I'm pretty sure I heard Darren was watching Judy Garland Shows on YouTube as preparation.)

Deleted Santa Baby scene: Santana helps Finn pick out a present for Rachel and sings Santa Baby.

Deleted box scene: A cute little Klaine thing. Blaine gives Kurt a self-made promise ring.

Bts video: Chris said that he had problems with the riffs, runs and scats in Let It Snow.

[bowtiesnmusicals]

Here is my recap of the Up and Down Under (Acafella's) episode of the podcast.

This is not exactly their favorite episode. It is not quite on the same level as the Pilot or Showmance.

After rewatching the episode Jenna's feelings changed. She still doesn't enjoy the acafella parts of the episode. She did enjoy the parts leading to Kurt coming out and the Sue and the cheerios parts.

The dislike of the episode might also be because it is centered around the adults.

When the episode aired the cast was in Australia doing press events.

It was the first time Kevin went to a strip club. They landed in Melbourne and went straight to a strip club.

The reception in Melbourne and Sydney was very warm. Thousands of kids showed up for the events in those cities. It was jarring and shocking to the cast. They didn't understand why so many fans had showed up.

It was the first time they were treated like celebrities/famous people.

They did the bridge climb in Sydney.

They were hungover during the bridge climb and freaked out a little bit about having to a breathalyzer test before being able to do the climb.

This trip was monumental for them.

The #1 song at the time was I've Got A Feeling by the Black Eyed Peas. They would do lots of events with them and even ride on the same plane at times.

It was the week of the Emmy's when this episode aired.

They are going to try a new recap style. They are going to talk about each storyline separately and then go from there.

This is the beginning of the big guest stars.

Do I need to recap the recap of the episodes?

The actor who played Henri (John Lloyd Young) was dating Lea at the time.

How did they get away with performing I Wanna Sex You Up?

Kevin was the only one not in the PTA performance scene.

Jenna remembers meeting Josh Groban and being starstruck.

The scene with Josh Groban and Sandy Ryerson is hilarious.

This was the first time Emma mentions John Stamos.

Every Broadway show has a dad song. The acafella's part of the episode is the dad song.

We get some scheming from Sue and the Cheerios. We get some nuggets of comedic brilliance form Naya.

Jenna loves early Quinn and Santana. They were like minions of Sue.

Tina got a line during the Vocal Adrenaline scenes and only had to do it once.

Harry's wife was in this episode. She was a part of Vocal Adrenaline.

Cheyenne Jackson was supposed to play Dakota Stanley. He travelled to LA and did his fitting. He got the flu. Lou in the costume department took care of him. He thought his Glee moment was over but Ryan created something else for him.

The c plot is the best plot of this episode. Mercedes has a crush on Kurt.

The gayvention was really fun to shoot. Jenna had fun getting to say Kurt is lady fabulous.

Jenna was invested in Bust Your Windows.

Amber and Kevin had been talking about Jasmine Sullivan. Amber talked about it with Ryan. This was the first time something they really loved got added to the show.

Bust Your Windows is the highlight of the episode for Jenna.

Kurt coming out to Mercedes was a huge deal. It was not something that was shown at network on tv at the time.

Shirtless Shue was at 7 mins 53 seconds. We are 3 for 3 so far. He has been shirtless in every episode.

Kevin's second favorite scene to shoot was the scene where Dakota was berating them. The cast were not professional at all. They couldn't help but laugh. The actor playing Dakota was a professional was even adlibbing some stuff.

Kevin and Jenna think that the line Rachel says when she storms out about being taller then Dakota was adlibbed.

This was the first instance of Frankenteen.

Frankenteen was Cory's original twitter handle.

Jenna's favorite scene of this episode is Sue's office.

The quote of the episode is, "I am going to ask you to smell your armpits. That is the smell of failure and it's stinking up my office."

Santana running out crying because she gets her tanning privileges revoked was the best.

Deborah Monk (Shue's mom) did a brilliant job playing drunk.

Everyone loves Howard Bamboo.

Tartie Takes:

Cringe Moment: The dancing and straightness of the boyband

Worst Dance Move: The Acafella's

They were suckers for Cory's sly trying to be sexy face. It was so good, adorable, and funny.

Favorite Song: Bust Your Windows

Best Line: I am going to ask you to smell your armpits. That is the smell of failure and it's stinking up my office.

Best Performance by a Prop: The vomit in to trashcan and the rock Mercedes throws into Kurt's windshield.

Shit That Didn't Age Well: The Sandy Ryerson thing about being allowed in the faculty room because he isn't allowed within 50 feet of children. Would that be allowed today? Also the insults from Dakota Stanley.

The Thing That Aged Well: Kurt coming out to Mercedes. Also what Mercedes said to him immediately after he came out. It is the perfect setup for what happens next episode between Burt and Kurt.

Honorable Mention Best Quote: Josh Groban loves a blowsy alcholic.

Shit We Found On Tiktok:

Ryan Murphy does backhanded credits. In American Horror Story there were credits for pale person #1 and pale person #2.

In glee there are credits for super gay warbler and other really gay warbler.

In the scripts in the stage directions Ian would write jokes and descriptions of people that would never be seen on camera.

Next week there will be a super great guest.

[launching-a-thousand-ships]

Kurt Glee Rewatch: Throwdown

Lowkey not a huge fan of the first chunk of eps bc wow, not much Kurt. This will be short.

Love Kurtcedes in this scene, and I love their little handshake thing they do. 

Kurt dissing showtunes, prob to support Mercedes. And omg, i forget how terrible Rachel is to Mercedes, esp this first season. I feel like kurt is the only reason they can eventually tolerate each other. Sorta the bridge lol.

“Gay kid” omg Kurt like ‘is that me? Maybe it could be someone else? How did she know??’

Also, love how Santana is the only one Sue calls by name. She doesn’t even know the jocks bc let’s be real, cheerleading has nothing to do with football.

Wow, Will gone and Kurt is suddenly way more active in the choir room numbers...

I did spot that single ladies hand wave at the start lol. Chris has mentioned he’s not really a dancer, so prob since that was the main dance he really learned, it’s just his go to for freestyling lol. 

He also mentioned how uncomfortable this sweater is and very fair. I do love Mercedes/Amber’s little laugh when he does the chair move.

Ugh and then Will is all ‘they’re singing about hate so we’ll sing about love’ like dude, what are you even saying??

I love this scene so much. They sing live, which is fun and you cna just see them being friends, hanging out. Ugh the main group was so great, the newbies s4 just did not have this bond.

Love how this group could be so chill but also hate each other, like that’s where the drama’s at. The sheer chaos of the back and forth... so insane.

Just sitting back, watching the drama unfold...

Will calling Sue a terrible teacher.... bc he has any leg to stand on. Makes sense it took so long for ND to win Nationals bc oof Will is just... so bad at teaching.

And then after that is the infamous “you’re all minorities... you’re in the glee club” line.... oof

Next up... Mash Up

[kottagelesbian]

I’ve been thinking about this poster a lot lately..

I’d love to see another life is strange game that’s set in the 1980′s when the Vortex club was formed and follows how it transforms from a safe space for outcasts to an elitist club that shuns those that don’t fit in. 

Imagine we could see young Joyce and William! Nathan’s parents! Max’s parents! Rachel’s mum!!! We could find out what happened to it! Who was involved in it, how it became so perverted from it original concept.

The soundtrack to life is strange is one of the most amazing parts of the game, had imagine it with an 80s twist! It’d sound amazing! 

I imagine we’d follow a character we haven’t met yet, she’d be similar to max in her style but more outspoken in her beliefs like chloe. Possibly a literary nerd! Her diary could be her writing poems about things she has experienced through the game!

She could be involved in the vortex club as they have meetings and parties, I imagine Sean Prescott would be involved in the club and possibly the one trying to change it to be an elitist club. 

And because it’s a life is strange game, I’m thinking someone needs to have powers, a part of me is thinking Sean Prescott could have powers, which is how he becomes such a powerful figurehead within Arcadia Bay, or possibly our new female protagonist could have powers. Possibly to read minds, or maybe be able to see into the future? I haven’t really been able to think up many powers but please share if you can think of any!

TLDR; I really want a 1980s life is strange prequel set around the vortex club and just this idea is making me really sad it doesn’t already exist! @lifeisstrange-blog

[mistress-underworld]

Blow Me

[ghost-in-the-hella]

J: “Join me for a swim?” with PriceMarsh, because I can't get enough of this ship.

Some soft pricemarsh for these troubled times. Enjoy.

---

Kate says a silent prayer before she approaches the woman sitting on the beach. She suspects that Chloe’s not the praying kind, and given the way people in Blackwell and around town never seem to have a kind word to say about her she’d be surprised if anybody else spoke to God on her behalf. And maybe Chloe prefers it that way. They haven’t talked about religion much in the few weeks of their budding friendship, but she’s pretty sure that Chloe is an atheist. “What kind of God would take my dad away when I was only fourteen?” For some people, tragedy brings them closer to God. For others, it pushes them away. But Chloe doesn’t make fun of her for being religious (unlike most people at Blackwell) and Kate doesn’t try to dissuade her from her own beliefs, so they get along beautifully. Everyone has their own path to walk in life, after all.

Kate’s path leads her toward Chloe’s slumped back and bowed head as she sits in the cooling sand and the fading light.

Chloe’s head doesn’t turn as Kate approaches, even though Kate’s footsteps in the sand aren’t exactly silent. It does raise slightly in acknowledgement, however, and Kate assumes that’s as close as she’s going to get to a greeting tonight. 

Kate’s not sure how long Chloe’s been sitting there, staring out at the slow waters of the bay. Chloe had texted her three times after midnight, which Kate of course didn’t see until she woke up at eight. Kate’s texted her five times since then at careful intervals so as to not seem too concerned, and Chloe hasn’t responded to a single one of them. She even tried calling Chloe despite phone calls not being a standard part of their friendship at this point, but she didn’t try again after it went immediately to voicemail. 

Kate’s never regretted not learning to drive so much before. It’s been sort of nice, actually, since Chloe’s got her truck and loves driving. Kate not wanting to ride the bus everywhere has been a good excuse for both of them to advance their friendship beyond “casual but amiable acquaintance” to “person I actively go out of my way to spend time with.” Today, however, not being able to drive has been a serious hindrance. It’s hard to search for someone when you’re reliant on small town bus routes and schedules. Once she started to really worry about Chloe’s silence and start looking for her, it took her nearly three hours to track her down at the beach.

She stops and stands next to where Chloe’s sitting in the sand. “Hey,” she says evenly, as if she hasn’t been clawing her hair out trying to find this woman half the day. 

“Hey,” Chloe answers without looking at her.

“...I got your texts.” Chloe doesn’t respond, so Kate continues, “I didn’t see them until I woke up; I’m sorry. I wasn’t ignoring you.”

Chloe nods thoughtfully, processing this. “My battery died. Didn’t want to go home to charge it.”

Kate can’t blame her for that. “Is it okay if I sit with you?”

Chloe turns to her then and looks at her with those clear blue eyes. It doesn’t seem fair that such beautiful eyes should have to hold such sadness. The light isn’t great, but Kate’s pretty sure she sees a smudge of a bruise beneath one, and that makes her stomach twist all the tighter. “Sure, whatever.” Chloe trains her eyes on the bay once more, but Kate can still feel them piercing her heart. 

Kate tucks her skirt around her legs carefully as she settles by Chloe’s side. The sand is damp and the warmth of the day is mostly gone from it. She looks at the woman beside her. She’s not wearing her beanie for once. She’s wearing short sleeves and her pale, too-thin arms are covered with goosebumps. Without even thinking, Kate removes her cardigan and drapes it over Chloe’s bare shoulders. Chloe glances at her in barely masked surprise. Kate thinks for a moment she’s going to object, but she just wraps her arms around herself and tugs the borrowed cardigan a little tighter around her shoulders.

Kate feels like she should say something, but Chloe breaks the heavy silence while she’s still trying to piece her words together. “Kinda late to come to the beach. Sun’s almost down. ‘Most everyone’s gone home.”

“I didn’t come for the beach. I came for you.”

Chloe’s brows lift then furrow. “Why.”

Because when she woke up to Chloe’s texts and saw how long ago she’d sent them, Kate had almost immediately gone into a panic spiral. Because Kate had texted and called and couldn’t reach her. Because Kate was terrified that Chloe was hurt and had nowhere to go and no one to talk to. “I wanted to make sure you were okay. You weren’t at the junkyard or the diner, so I thought you might be here or maybe the lighthouse.”

“Not a whole lot of places to go in this town,” Chloe says, and maybe it’s a trick of the non-light but Kate would swear that her expression softened when Kate told her she’d been looking for her. “I used to come here all the time,” Chloe continues. “My dad used to take me and my friend Max here every weekend in the summer. When we got old enough, we’d take the bus by ourselves and stay here all day. We practically lived in the bay.” She chuckles softly to herself. “She - Max - used to tease me I was going to turn into a mermaid because I spent more time in the water than on the land.”

Kate can picture that. Chloe’s got long arms and longer legs, built for swimming. Her hair wouldn’t have been blue when she was a child, Kate assumes, but Kate can imagine how it would look now: blue and purple locks flowing with the waves, fanning out around her head like a soft halo. The vivid reds and greens and blues of her tattoo extra bright against the pale of her skin, all shimmering under the water and glittering with reflected light. Long fingers cupping brackish water, lean body moving through the bay like she was born to do nothing else. “Punk rock mermaid,” Kate says a bit dreamily, already picturing how she would draw her. 

Chloe huffs a small laugh. “Nah, not when I was a kid. I was a pretty big dweeb if you can believe it. Super into science, major anime nerd, drew comics, all that stuff.”

Kate can believe it, actually, but she keeps that to herself. 

The smile that had been growing on Chloe’s lips fades away. “Rach loves swimming, too. After Max left - her family moved to Seattle; same day as my dad’s funeral, can you believe that shit? - I didn’t go swimming for a long time. Probably for the best; I would’ve just drowned myself.” She picks at the cuticles of her chewed up fingernails fretfully and Kate suppresses the powerful urge to pull her into a comforting embrace and stroke her hair like her father has always done for her when she’s upset. “But Rach is a Cali girl, so even though our bay’s nothing compared to the Pacific she just has to go swimming. Like, constantly. Day and night. The girl’s blood is half salt water, I swear.”

Kate’s got this anxious bubbling in her stomach that she doesn’t know how to quell. She knows of Rachel Amber, but she doesn’t know her. She went missing last April, three months before Kate moved into the dorms. Everything she knows about Rachel she knows from the unavoidable gossip in the dorms, the graffiti scattered around town - some of it doting, most of it unrepeatably vile, and Chloe. 

She actually met Chloe because of Rachel Amber, oddly enough. Or, more precisely, she met Chloe because Rachel Amber went missing. One day Chloe happened to be hanging up missing person posters around campus while Kate was putting up flyers for the abstinence club, and when Kate saw what Chloe was posting (when she saw Chloe’s eyes) she had offered to help her distribute them. They’d gotten to talking as they worked, and by the time the posters were all hung they’d exchanged numbers.

Kate owes this friendship (this crush) to Rachel. And Rachel’s been missing for five months now. No matter how many posters they hang, no matter how many prayers Kate sends up for this lost girl to be found, she’s been missing for almost half a year. Chloe still talks about her like she expects to see her coming around the corner any minute now sometimes. Kate doesn’t know whether encouraging Chloe’s hope does more good or more harm at this point. Women who go missing for this long, beautiful young women like Rachel Amber… Kate wants to have faith in Rachel’s safety, but her mother’s been telling her horror stories about what happens to girls like her since before Kate was even old enough to understand.

“So we go swimming together a lot. Not now, obviously. But… yeah. Total punk rock mermaids.” She scoffs lightly, but Kate can hear the sorrow in her laugh. “I… I haven’t gone swimming in months. Not since she…” Chloe sighs. She shakes her head and tries to sound annoyed rather than heartbroken. “Missed the whole fucking summer. Now it’s probably too cold to swim. She’s probably been off surfing in Cali all summer, and I’ve just been staring at the bay like she’s coming in on the next boat. How pathetic is that?”

“It’s not pathetic at all. You miss your friend.” Kate reaches out a tentative hand and is relieved 

when Chloe accepts her touch without so much as a flinch. 

“I miss the bay,” Chloe says suddenly. “I miss the way it felt to just run out into the waves and not give a fuck. I miss feeling weightless and small and like if I swam far enough I could step out into a pirate’s treasure cove, or on some forgotten island, and start a new life. I miss feeling free.”

Kate’s never been swimming in the bay. She spent her summer here ingratiating herself with the local parish, learning the bus schedule, breaking in her library card. She stands carefully, dusting the sticky sand off her skirt. 

Chloe looks at her askance. “Heading home?”

Kate shakes her head. She reaches out a hand to Chloe. “Join me for a swim?” Kate asks, and her voice hardly trembles even though she’s beyond nervous. 

Chloe stares at her like she’s sprouted a second head and then she laughs in disbelief. “Are you for real?”

“Very much so.”

“You got a bathing suit on under your clothes, Kit-Kat?”

“Do you?”

“No.” Chloe tries to leer, but it’s so uncertain it falls apart before it can look properly devious. “You askin’ me to go skinny dipping? I thought you were supposed to be a prude about that stuff.”

“I’m not a prude,” Kate protests, her face reddening. “But no, I’m not asking you to go skinny dipping. Or at least I’m not going skinny dipping; you can do as you please.” She slips off her shoes, and good Lord, this really is a terrible idea, isn’t it. She’s not dressed for swimming in the slightest. Her blouse is white, and her skirt is, well, a skirt, but it’s too late to back out now just because she’s had a sudden attack of logic since Chloe’s already taking her hand (and oh Lord Chloe’s hand is so cold and so strong and so perfect) and hauling herself up to her feet.

“Gonna be a weird ride back to campus,” Chloe says with a grin that’s building in its certainty. “Wet jeans are hell to drive in. You know my heater doesn’t work, right?”

“I’ve ridden in your truck before, haven’t I?”

“True that.” Chloe removes Kate’s cardigan and folds it with surprising politeness by her shoes before tugging off her boots and dropping them haphazardly into the sand. She empties her pockets onto the pile of clothes: a crumpled cigarette pack, some loose change, a parking ticket, a key, a lighter, her phone. Kate places her handbag beside them. “You ready to do this thing?”

Kate nods quickly before she can chicken out. “Are you?”

The smile that lights up Chloe’s face is the most radiant thing that Kate’s ever seen. “Hella ready.” Chloe reaches out her hand again, and Kate takes it. 

The water is cold, and swimming in a skirt is just as difficult as Kate feared. It’s completely worth it.

[eternallysantanassass]

Thoughts on Lea Michele and being racist. I 💜 U. And hope you’re ok.

Thank you, Nonnie 😁

I am going to jump into this. I have never been a fan of Lea Michele and hated the character Rachel Berry so freaking much. I wanted to punch her in the mouth every time she said something or whined about not getting a solo, and putting other glee club members down. Honestly, I wish she was the one who got hurt in the accident and not Quinn. Yup, I am still pissed off at how Ryan Murphy treated Quinn and Dianna Agron, but I digress.

Color me not surprised when Sam came out with how Lea treated her. She thinks that she is entitled and deserves more than everyone else. Her albums flopped and no one really gives a fuck about her except for the ones who worship at the altar of Lea Michele. I am surprised it took this long for someone to say something about her behavior. Not to bring up Naya. But she mentioned in her book About how awful Lea was to her. People brushed it off like Naya was bitter or jealous, but the truth is she exposed her. And now 4 years later Sam came out with Lea being racist and ‘shitting on her wig’ that’s when Alex, Amber, Heather, Kevin and former co-stars from other Lea projects spoke up about her behavior. I wish that read that Santana gave Kurt was reserved for Rachel. Lea needs to be held accountable for her actions and her words. I want to see if she is going to ‘apologize’ for her behavior.

[mrs-evadne-cake]

“You shouldn't like things because people tell you you're supposed to.”- Video And Table Top Games

Since we’re about to hit the Stranger Things Doldrums where it’s been a while since S3 and S4 has just started filming and if you’re anything like me you’re gonna start jonesing bad- I thought I’d make a So You Need A Hit survival kit for myself of some Stranger Things-esque media to read/watch/play during the wait and that maybe you guys might be interested too. Not all of them are gonna set the world on fire- but hopefully there’s some stuff that people haven’t seen before Expect a lot of Small Town Nostalgia, a bunch of monsters, and more plucky, dangerously unsupervised kids than you can shake a stick at. 

(STRANGER THINGS-ESQUE RECS CON’T) 

Night In The Woods : “The player controls Mae, a recent college dropout, who has returned to her hometown, the sleepy mining town of Possum Springs. There, she struggles with the changes to her home and her former friends - Bea, Gregg, Angus and Germ. As Mae struggles with finding her own identity and coping with the massive changes in her life, she begins to have odd dreams with ominous messages, and discovers hints of some mysterious force living out in the woods of her community.” -TVTropes

(Gregg rulz okay.)

Beyond: Two Souls : “The game centers on a young woman named Jodie Holmes, a girl with strange powers, raised from childhood in a research facility who tries to uncover the mystery of a strange poltergeist-like presence serving as her protector as well as Nathan Dawkins, a researcher for the U.S. government who serves as her surrogate father.” -TVTropes

(This is sort of a luke-warm rec. The game is...interesting and I wasn’t a fan, but too uncannily similar to the El/Lab/CIA elements of ST to leave off, so don’t take my word for it.)

The Blackout Club : “Up to four players work together as members of The Blackout Club, a group of kids who have run away from home and teamed up to combat the mysterious supernatural force that has taken root within, and beneath, their homes. The young members of the club roam the town at night, avoiding their sleepwalking parents and the cult's technological sentries, doing what they can to save themselves — and everyone else.” -TVTropes 

Life is Strange : “It's October 2013, and Maxine "Max" Caulfield  is an 18-year-old High School senior who just recently moved back to her hometown of Arcadia Bay, Oregon. When she sees her former best friend Chloe get shot by a fellow student, Max discovers she can rewind time. As Chloe and Max try to patch their rusted friendship...Max learns of Rachel Amber, a former Blackwell Academy student who disappeared under mysterious circumstances.... At the same time, Chloe and Max try to investigate the ramifications of Max's new power, spurred by Max's recurring visions of a tornado wiping out the town in four days.” -TVTropes

Oxenfree : “Described as being both a supernatural thriller and a coming-of-age story, you play as the teenage Alex. Set one year after the death of her brother, Alex, her new step-brother Jonas, and her friends go to Edwards Island, an abandoned military base on the West Coast. While planning to have a night of simple partying, they instead get involved with the supernatural as they tune an old radio.”- TVTropes

Day of the Tentacle: “Uber-nerd Bernard Bernoulli once risked his life to save the wacky Edison family from the control of an evil meteor. Five years later, he receives a desperate letter from the Edisons' friendly pet Green Tentacle begging him to return. It seems that Purple Tentacle, Green's evil brother, has imbibed some toxic waste carelessly dumped by Dr. Fred Edison and mutated into an insane genius. Dr. Fred has captured the two tentacles and is now going to put them both down. Bernard gathers his wacky roommates Laverne and Hoagie (a spaced-out, neurotic med student and a heavyset but easygoing roadie, respectively), and charges to the rescue.”- TVTropes 

Control “Players control Jesse Faden, a young woman who's been on the run ever since a strange incident in her childhood. Aided by a mysterious presence, she manages to track down the US Government's Federal Bureau of Control, responsible for keeping the supernatural hidden, but she's arrived at the worst possible moment, as the Bureau has been invaded by an otherworldly force known as the Hiss. Appointed as the Bureau's Director by a mysterious entity known only as the Board, Jesse must now regain control of the agency's headquarters, the Oldest House.”- TVTropes

(For fans of the weird science CIA elements- heavily influenced by The SCP Foundation.)

Table Top Games:

Tales From the Loop: “In Tales from the Loop, the players play as the Kids, a group of friends, aged 10-15, living in the late 1980s. In the Mysteries, the Kids encounter machines and creatures that have come to exist because of the Loop, a huge underground particle accelerator built in the late 1960s.”-Wiki

Kids On Bikes: “Kids on Bikes chooses to place the game into a turn-of-the-century suburban setting. Players take on the roles of kids, teens, and adults in a seemingly ordinary world, who must come to terms with the extraordinary. It's a time where two-way radios were the prime method of communication for kids, where men in dark glasses and suits showed up without warning and were forgotten about the next day, and where the new kid in school hides a dark secret.” -Kids On Bikes

Home By Dark: “A story game inspired by the resourceful and misunderstood kids of many 80’s films, along with the myriad homage films and series that have come since. You’ll play kids, teens, and adults that have discovered a powerful innocent in your small town. You must protect it from nefarious pursuers that want it for their own plans, all the while avoiding the growing danger that threatens the town. You and your friends help to protect this mysterious secret while insecurities, fears, and latent drama from their own lives will surface and threaten to unravel the whole plan.”- Home By Dark

[meditatemoremedicateless]

In Review: My 2019 Fan Fiction

Projects Started

Imitation is the Sincerest Form of Flattery - My Hero Academia 1 chapter published 1,120 words Gist: Himiko Toga tries to go on dates with her crushes and accidentally starts a polycule.

Projects Concluded

Just the Two of Us (and Madoka) - Puella  Magi Madoka Magica 5 chapters total 20,188 words Gist: Post-Rebellion, Tomoe Mami and Akemi Homura start dating and that fixes everything.

Gold Can Stay  - Life is Strange / Love is Strange 8 chapters total 42,427 words Gist: After the True Ending of Rachel’s Route, Max, Chloe, and Rachel try to work out their new relationship dynamics while going on a road trip.

Neon Fire - RWBY 5 (now 8 - I brought it back after finishing for Volume 7) 18,000 words (Arc I), 31,000 words (total) Gist: After their doubles match, Neon asks Yang out on a date. Stays canon compliant through Volume 7.

Dear Kate, - Life is Strange 10 chapters total 45,936 words Gist: Kate is possessed by Rachel Amber while they both try to manage an accidental relationship with Victoria Chase.

Projects Updated

This Club . . . is Filled with Incredibly Cute Girls! [and you’re one of them] - Doki Doki Literature Club! 1 new chapter published (2 total) 12,449 words Gist: ‘You’, a college first year, join a literature club for monsters to hang out with cute girls. You soon start dating a vampire named Yuri.

I Could Be Your Beach (if only you’d remember) - Doki Doki Literature Club! 1 new chapter published (2 total) 6,661 words Gist: Yuri pines for Natsuki while a lot of spooky shit that should be more important is going on around them.

I finally updated and finished far more than I started! I nearly didn’t start ANY new ideas, except for this BNHA fic at the last second.

Finishing Gold Can Stay makes me feel much more at ease. It was such an important project to me for so long - and now it’s finished!

Next up on my plate is 4 updates to Imitation is the Sincerest Form of Flattery and keeping Neon Fire up to date with Volume 7 of RWBY. I will probably only publish one more chapter before going on hiatus for about 5 months.

[richardcampus]

Welcome to the real "Before The Storm"

Continuar lendo

[dalekofchaos]

Why I feel like Deck Nine did not understand Rachel Amber

Recently I did a full replay of all the games. From Farewell, BTS and LIS. and I just feel that the Rachel from LIS and BTS are two completely different characters.

I don’t feel that Deck Nine understands Rachel Amber as a character or understands what made the fanbase love her from the first game. Rachel is a character shrouded in mystery. The vibe I got from Chloe indicates that Rachel Amber saved her at her lowest and made her feel like she could live again. I also got the vibe that Rachel had neglectful parents who cared very little of her and Rachel was tired of the pressures of being little ms perfect and the bullying she suffers at Blackwell. So Chloe and Rachel wanted to be free from Arcadia Bay. Chloe wanted to be free of an abusive step-father and her mother who allows the abuse to go on and Rachel wanted to be free from everything at Arcadia Bay. Started a knew life as a model in LA. It was their Santa Monica Dream.

The characterization of Rachel Amber in BTS just feels like D9 does not understand Rachel. Rachel Amber is meant to be a morally grey character. There are hints that she wasn’t this perfect angel Chloe thought she was and then backed away from that perspective out of fear fans would be angry at their depiction of Rachel. Rachel Amber who I knew in the first game was just not there. Rachel’s parents are not neglectful, Rachel having neglectful parents and Chloe having an abusive stepfather and abuse enabling mother, would show just why Rachel and Chloe wants to leave Arcadia Bay. What happens in BTS? Rachel has kind and loving parents and a bio mom that is a horrible representation of drug addiction(everything about how D9 wrote Sera sends a horrible message, wtf D9?) James tries to have Sera killed, James is a compulsive liar about everything to Rachel and all of sudden James just pretends that Rachel isn’t missing? In BTS, Rachel had no interesting perspective or enlightenment to offer to Chloe or be the positive force to Chloe or even showed why she was this mysterious chameleon who fit in so perfectly with everyone who was adored by everyone. Rachel is someone who liked to party, too cool for the Vortex Club and had a great eye for images and for art. The only positives of BTS’ version of Rachel is The Tempest, she was just a pretty looking character model with a great voice actress that's it.

Rachel in BTS has no aspiration to be a model and instead of Rachel helping Chloe deal with her grief, the game makes it about Chloe helping Rachel with her family drama. We never get to see Rachel meet Joyce(Joyce in LIS makes it seem like her and Rachel got along) we never get to see Rachel defending Chloe from David or Rachel as this ambiguous character. She’s portrayed as this character that must be protected at all costs, like she’s neither ambiguous nor does she have any agency. 

The relationship between Chloe and Rachel should have been more. Chloe’s “Rachel was my angel” comment showed a lot to how Chloe loved Rachel and how much she meant to her.  Chloe tells Max that Rachel entered her life when was at her absolute lowest and that it was she who helped her deal with the grief of having lost her father but the entire game is centered around Chloe being the one who is supporting Rachel as she deals with a serious family drama of her own. What Before The Storm should have been was  Rachel helping lift Chloe through the worse point of her life. If Rachel had stopped Chloe from committing suicide… as was the commonly believed interpretation to what happened between Chloe and Rachel up until BtS, then Chloe’s ”���she was my angel” would have meant it was truly special and real. But instead they bump into each other at an illegal concert and Rachel distracted some thug who works for Damon and we spend the game finding out who Sera is in a reveal we all saw it coming and only to have Rachel taken out of the third episode where Rachel never talks to her and makes the whole thing feel pointless. What the game should have been was Chloe and Rachel together having fun rocking out and Chloe starting to live again and show that Chloe Price loves Rachel Amber and Rachel loves Chloe.

I do love Amberprice and love the scenes we got, but I feel that it is important to show Rachel as a morally grey character and eventually show her drift away from Chloe.  Yes they were in love and had this great relationship and they loved each other. It’s important to see and know the people we romanticize are not who we thought they were but love them regardless of their flaws. Rachel was looking for a way out of Arcadia Bay. She first thought both her and Chloe can escape to LA together. But over time she did not think that was possible anymore. Chloe dodges her car payments and her family is in debt and Chloe is in debt to Frank. She still wants to leave with Chloe, but Rachel needed an alternative way so she and Chloe can escape. So that’s when  Rachel turns to Frank, she used him for his money and drugs because as  time goes on, Rachel turns to drugs to numb the pain. She parties with The Vortex Club and as Nathan said “Rachel partied like a fiend on her own.” Hell, she was so desperate to leave Arcadia Bay she even asked the trucker to take her to LA. But I believe everything she was doing, she was doing so She and Chloe can get out of Arcadia Bay.

Then, Rachel meets Mark Jefferson. Jefferson was Rachel’s teacher. This video explains Rachel and Jefferson perfectly.  Rachel saw him as her way to LA. She wanted to have her pictures modeled by a professional, which he was, but Rachel never saw him for what he was. A sheep in wolf’s clothing, a monster. He saw her as the perfect subject. A human chameleon with many visual possibilities and he felt they had a connection. Manipulating her into believing that he is the father figure that James never was for her. Rachel wrote a letter to Chloe in the shack but discarded it. She feels that he changed her life but the discarded letter shows that she felt ashamed about the whole relationship. Her shame indicates that she was apart of the Dark Room as a consenting subject. At first she just saw it as a big photography project outside of school, but then Rachel started to look into Jefferson’s past models and figured out something was terribly wrong. In Jefferson’s own words “Not like Rachel, who was always looking in the wrong places. Poor Rachel.” Jefferson of course finds out because The Dark Room is under 24 hours surveillance. So out of fear of Rachel telling everyone, Jefferson kills Rachel, doses Nathan and poses Nathan’s unconscious body with Rachel’s lifeless body.

The vibe I got from the first game is that Rachel and Chloe have this very important and special bond. But Rachel just wanted to be free of Arcadia Bay by any means necessary. Rachel would go far to get what she wanted. Someone who is willing to lie to the people she cared about to satisfy her own needs and goals. Personally, I see Rachel as being okay with manipulating everybody BUT Chloe, which gives everybody a foothold to try and gaslight Chloe and Max about her, trying to get them to doubt that Rachel genuinely cared about Chloe. Rachel wanted a way out and she thought she had her way out, but in the end she played with fire and got burned.  

[bowtiesnmusicals]

Here is my recap for the La Episode Bonita (Power of Madonna) episode of the podcast.

This was the first tribute episode.

Ryan Murphy directed this episode.

Some of the cast did a spread in TV Guide to promote the episode.

This episode aired on April 20, 2010.

The #1 song was still Rude Boy by Rihanna.

The #1 movie was Kick-Ass.

On April 17 2010 they won Outstanding Comedy Series at the GLAAD Awards.

They also won Future Classic at the TV Land Awards. Kevin and Jenna still have their trophies. Ann Coulter was sitting next to Jane Lynch. Why was Ann Coulter at the Glee table? This was recorded on the same night at the GLAAD Awards.

Ryan Murphy and Jane Lynch are huge Madonna fans.

They go over the song list and start the recap of the episode.

We get a Sue's Journal scene to start off the episode.

Ryan usually always had something to do with a character breaking the 4th wall.

Right before Express Yourself started Kevin shouted Come on squirrels, do you believe in love.

Kevin remembers the choreography to Express Yourself.

The guys were actually really loving the girls number and couldn't show it in character. Well minus Chris of course. All the guys except Kurt didn't want to do Madonna.

Jenna said it was fun to do a real number and actually get to dance. The guys weren't bored and would cheer on the girls between takes.

Kevin loves that we get so much Naya in this episode.

Santana says to Finn that he is about as sexy as a cabbage patch kid and that it is exhausting to look at him. She tells him the truth that Rachel is still with Jesse.

The scene between Sue and Emma in Sue's office is really funny. Sue compares Emma to a panda at the zoo who refuses to mate.

This whole episode was directed really well.

The hallway number with all the different Madonna looks was really cool. Make-up and wardrobe had a fun time with it. There was a look for each era of Madonna.

Ryan loves a hallway shot.

High schools are really alive in the hallways.

Sue and Schue insult each others hair. Kurt and Mercedes were watching the whole thing. Sue reveals she is actually jealous of Schue's hair. She also says she is 29 years old when she talks about ruining her hair by dying it with random chemicals.

Kevin had no desire to direct at this time and didn't care for the Artie being a director storyline in the beginning. Kevin has now directed several music videos. It is like art imitating life. Maybe Artie is why Kevin started directing music videos.

Vogue is a full shot for shot remake of the original music video. Jane looked beautiful. They spent more then a day on this number.

When changing lyrics in a song they would sing two versions of the song just incase they didn't get permission to use the changed lyrics.

Kevin loves the scene with Rachel and Jesse in the library.

Jenna buys Groffsauce playing a sexy straight man. So hot.

Then we move to Will and Emma. Emma wants to do the nasty with Will.

This leads into Like A Virgin. This number is so good. Naya is SINGING on this song. This was the first time they realized they could give Naya more to do in a song. The number ends in a bit of cliffhanger.

We eventually learn that Santana and Finn were the only ones to go through with it.

Jesse St. James joins the Glee Club.

Mercedes and Kurt have been laying the groundwork this episode for them to join the Cheerios.

This then leads into 4 Minutes. Kevin said it was an explosion of joy. Chris and Amber looked and sounded great. It was fun to see them perform outside of Glee Club.

The boys do What It Feels Like For A Girl. This number is so so good. Kevin said shooting this number was weird but recording it was fun. He loves this version. He reverted to his boy band ad libs in this song. This was the first and only time there were no guide vocals for the ad libs.

There were some Tina and Artie scenes in this episode. Ryan kept telling Jenna to go bigger.

Ryan and Paris were very grounding directors.

This scene was not written in the way that it ended up being shot and used in the episode. Ryan rewrote the scene and gave them new lines. The new scene felt so much more right.

Kevin liked that this was a real mature conversation especially after th stupid stuff Artie said earlier in the episode.

The whole cast has a soft spot for Like A Prayer.

They started rehearsing for the first tour a month after this episode.

Amber's mom is right behind her in the choir and her sister is to the right of Amber. There is one shot of them together and it is really sweet.

It was really fun to perform. It was their first number with Groffsauce.

They had a full choir and were performing for no one.

It was nice to see Amber and Lea both getting an opportunity to shine together int his number.

When they did this number at their last show of the tour at Radio City the choir was made up of the crew including Ryan, Ian, and Brad. They had surprised the cast. Jenna was bawling. Kevin also cried and was glad their backs were to the audience. Good memories.

Kevin and Jenna love this episode. The writing and song selections were great.

Tartie Takes:

Cringe Moments/Ouchies - Kevin: The way the guys were treating the girls and Puck not wanting to do songs by a female artist. Jenna: Brittany dating a 7 year old.

Worst Dance Move - none

Best Dance Move - The stilts. 4 Minutes was incredible, and Express Yourself.

Best Song - Jenna: Vogue, Ray of Light, or Like A Virgin. Kevin: Like A Virgin or What It Feels Like. They are all really good.

Best/Word Performance by a Prop - Jenna: the monocles in Express Yourself. Kevin: The head mics.

Best Line: Sue's comment about elves in Schue's hair. Mercedes and Kurt.

Shit We Found on TikTok;

Does the Believe sign in Ted Lasso go back to a Glee SNL sketch?

The next episode is Home.

Alexandria House is dong a Walkathon on March 18th.

[miasswier]

miasswier’s ultimate glee ranking: no 57

57: Tested

Written by:  Russel Friend and Garrett Lerner Directed by:  Paul McCrane

Overall Thoughts: This is an episode that has grown on me a lot as time passes. I’ve moved it around this list quite a bit, but to be honest, the reason it never went higher than number 57 is because I just can’t get over the feeling I got when I first watched the episode, something I will talk about in the negative section. So, even though this whole list is super subjective, have a massive subjectivity warning for the placement of this episode in the ranking.

What I Like:

I thought it was cool to see all the New York guys hang out and have multiple scenes together.

The opening is hilarious and 100% on drugs.

I really appreciate Artie’s story here. Not only because it promotes safe sex, but because it also shows that disabled people can and do have active sex lives. People are attracted to them, people want to date them. So often disabled people are desexualized, so it’s actually a breath of fresh air to see Artie being allowed to be sexual.

The whole scene where Artie tells the guys he has chlamydia. Sam yelling “I’m slut shaming you Artie” will always be one of my favourite moments on the show. 

I will be forever grateful to Amber Riley for this story with Mercedes. Not only for presenting abstinence as a choice without shaming those who do choose to have sex, but for showing that not everybody goes into adulthood with sexual experience, and that there’s nothing wrong with waiting or wanting to wait.

Blaine is goddamn relatable to me in this episode and I too am always eating.

The one thing I do appreciate about the Klaine aspect of this episode is that it addresses something not often talked about in regards to queer relationships – the fact that you will sometimes be jealous of each other. Whether it be the physical, friendships, success, whatever. The physical can be particularly hard, I think, in same sex relationships, and so to show that on TV is actually really cool. Also, I do like how they addressed the idea of the power dynamic between Kurt and Blaine, even if it wasn’t really a spoken power dynamic, and how it’s now shifted, and how that has affected the relationship.

Julie is just really cute.

Oh my god that whole scene with Kurt, Artie, and Julie at the diner is pure comedy gold. I lose it when they all start chanting “clap, clap, clap.”

Kurt’s journey from “we haven’t had an unscheduled make out session in months” to “we haven’t been intimate in a week” like oh my god Kurt calm down.

Kurt and Blaine’s offense at Artie saying sex isn’t the be-all-end-all, and being so against Sam’s abstinence club.

What I Don’t Like:

Even though I think it’s cool that they gave this story to Artie, I do always find it so icky when shows have a male character pursuing one girl while sleeping with another. This is a hugely subjective dislike of mine, though, and the fact that this story has been given to Artie sort of outweighs this negative.

Sam and sex aren’t a great combination, I’ve found. Back in “Dance With Somebody” they have his whole “men can’t be expected to wait” thing, and in this episode he can be quite pushy at times. There’s also the fact that there are several mentions of how Sam waiting for Mercedes is super romantic exclusively because of the fact that he’s nineteen. Like waiting for sex is the absolutely worst thing a man can be made to do. Men will not die without sex. Nobody will die without sex. Nobody is ever owed sex, and it shouldn’t be some amazing thing for a man not to break up with his girlfriend because she isn’t ready to have sex.

The biggest reason this episode, despite being fairly good all around, wasn’t able to break into the top 50 is because the first time I watched it, it left me feeling like Kurt and Blaine weren’t good together. I had never felt that way before, and I hated the feeling. I still don’t think their relationship is in a very healthy place in this episode, and you can actually see the hints of where things will fall apart in the future. Kurt saying “sometimes I think we talk too much” is the worst, because miscommunication is their biggest fucking problem. Also, I always know it’s a sign of bad things to come when Blaine is hiding his feelings, because he is a character who always wears his heart on his sleeve. I don’t know that I’m explaining this right, but basically tl;dr: the first time I watched this episode I was really shaken on my belief that Kurt and Blaine were meant to be, and I’ll always hold that against the episode.

In past seasons this may have been a positive, but it feels really weird that Rachel is only in two scenes in this episode. It’s like Artie in “Bash”. There’s only six characters being focused on right now, so it’s super obvious when one is being neglected. I get that the next episode is all about Rachel, but seriously, where was she.

Songs:

Addicted to Love: I’ve never jived much with this song or the performance :/

I Want to Know What Love is: This is a really good performance, but it’s hilarious to me that it’s being sung in a church.

Love is a Battlefield: Not my favourite Klaine duet, but I do enjoy it. I gotta be totally honest, though, there’s an extra in this scene who is so distracting. She’s literally so beautiful, I just watch her the whole time. Oops.

Let’s Wait a While: Another one that I’m not a big fan of. And believe me, it pains me to say it, because Mercedes sings it. But yeah.

Final Thoughts: This is a good, decently enjoyable episode, but it made me question Klaine the first time it aired, and I’ve never forgiven it for that. The music isn’t amazing, and the lack of Rachel feels strange. That being said, it is really funny, and I do enjoy all the stories. But, yeah. The Klaine thing, mainly.

[jessestjamesnyc]

Para: Let Me Entertain You

LOCATION: The Sassy Nights night club

TIMING: Sunday June 24th, late evening hours

TAGGING: @nycjessestjames & @dariuspuckerman

Darius: That night there was a large crowd filling every corner of the club. Being the last weekend of the Pride month celebration it was only natural to end things up with a bang, and people mingled, chatted, ate, danced and so many other things, just being happy. Darius made his way through the crowd, a glass of scotch in his hand, and he nodded and greeted all the people he came across with, some already regulars of the club, others people that were there for the first time, and wanted to say hello to him. He was an expert in public relations by now, and he knew how to be charming with people.

His tall height also allowed him to have a particular good mobile eagle eye on the place, making sure everything was running smoothly, and just in case they weren’t, he had a panic button device in his pocket, which would summon the security team to where the trouble was. Safety was always a first to him. After making another round he headed towards the bar and took seat on his usual spot, at the corner of the bar, so he wouldn’t interfere with the job of the bartenders, then kept on enjoying his drink.

Jesse: Jesse stood outside of the night club, staring up at the sign flickering overhead. Sassy Nights, who the fuck came up with the name Sassy Nights. “Ridiculous,” he muttered to himself, shaking his head. He had half a mind to turn around and walk home, back to the safety of the apartment. He’d stopped calling in their or his apartment after his talk with Rachel, because it was neither of those things anymore. It was the apartment he was staying in while he looked for a new place, but that was about it. Except, it wasn’t. The apartment would always be theirs, and he needed to get out. But that was a problem for another day. For now, he was here, standing outside of the ridiculously named club. 

He’d been speaking to the owner - Darius - the other day and had managed to convince himself it was worth actually checking the place out. The other man had boasted about the best drinks in New York City, and Jesse had been holed up by himself for too long. One evening out on the town could only do him some good. He sighed, and walked through the doors, the music that had been muffled by the entrance hallway reached his ears. It was clear it was still pride month, the bright colourful atmosphere made it obvious. A smile tugged at his lips. He may be miserable, but at least there were people out there, having fun, and celebrating themselves. He almost wished he’d done more of that, before everything. He made his way to the bar (if he was going to make it through the night, he needed alcohol) and spotted Darius at the end of it. He didn’t expect his offer of the first round free to be something he’d uphold (nor was he even positive he’d know who he was), but it was worth the shot. He was out of a job, who could blame him. He walked down the bar to him, and leaned on the counter beside him. “So,” he looked at him with a small grin, “is that offer of the first round free still available?”

Darius: Still savouring his scotch, Darius talked briefly with the bartender to make sure everything was running smoothly, stock wise and all; he needed to know those kind of things in advanced, so he could make a quick trip down to the basement and get what he was needed. For a manager, Darius often felt and acted like he was just another employee, and it didn’t bother him at all. On the contrary, to him it felt good to be part of the process of running a popular and sucessful club, not only to sit there and bark orders, but to work for it as well. He had just finished talking to the other man, when he turned around and the first person he saw was Jesse sitting at the bar.

Darius smiled at the man and nodded, first acnowledging his presence there, and he was about to go to him, when he saw Jesse walking up to where he was. “I’m a man of my word, Mr. St. James. I made a promise, and I’ll keep it.” He snapped his fingers at the bartender, and while the other found the moment to come to where they were, Darius focused his attention on Jesse, his eyes roaming down the man’s figure as discretly as he could. “Glad you could make it. And you came on a very good night, so I can asure you will have fun.” The bartender finally came and Darius turned to Jesse. “What will you be having then?”

Jesse: Jesse would never admit it aloud, but he was mildly surprised Darius had recognised him straight up. The other man didn’t seem particularly interested in musical theatre, and he’d assumed he gave the “first round free” line to anybody, just to try to get their money. And yet, he had remembered him. Maybe he was secretly a Broadway fan. He remembered, bitterly for a second, he’d recognised him as “married to Rachel Berry.” That’s all anyone in his life knew him as. And he hadn’t minded, their friends - while their friends - had always been Rachel’s friends first.

“We’ll see,” he said in reply to Darius’ confidence, not really sure how to read the other man. He was attractive, yes, and maybe in a different lifetime but Jesse wasn’t looking for anybody. Not now not for… he didn’t know how long. Right now it felt like never. But Darius had mentioned him being married after all, so he hoped his invite was just a friendly offering, to check out the place. Because if it was anything more, he’d imagine the night would end a lot sooner than he thought. “I’ve been living off nothing but wine for far too long,” he admitted to the other man with a laugh, “and I wouldn’t know where to begin with cocktails, never had one. So how’s the scotch?” He asked, glancing down at the glass in Darius’ hand.

Darius: Having heard somewhere on their online conversation about him being bummed, probably about his marriage, of which Darius didn’t intent to ask, since it wasn’t his problem. He had just mentioned Jesse to come over to relax a little at the club, and that was what it was all about. Not that he wouldn’t definitely taken a chance with that man if he had it, since he was most definitely easy on the eyes, but in the end Darius didn’t know if Jesse liked men that way, so it was best not to go into that touchy subject, and keeping it friendly. At the end of the night, they could always be just two people nice enough to hang out with each other.

“As much as I appreciate a well aged wine, there’s just so much you can have before it starts losing its appeal.” He chuckled as he looked at his almost empty glass, then he drank what was left of it, then signaled the bartender for a refill, and another glass. “It’s very good. It’s actually one only I get to drink here, it’s that special.” He smiled at him, even threw in a small wink for good measure, then after their drinks were brought he raised his own glass. “So, what should we drink to tonight?”

Jesse: Jesse laughed at Darius’ comment about the scotch, accepting the glass from the bartender when they were pushed toward them. “Well, then I feel honoured,” he replied, looking down at the amber liquid that was now in the glass in front of him. “I…” He picked up the glasses and considered Darius’ question. He was hardly in a toasting mood, he’d barely wanted to leave the apartment but he’d known that he needed to. He needed to finally accept what was happening. Neither he nor Rachel were fighting for their marriage, which meant it was going to end. He couldn’t be with her knowing she loved Quinn, and she… well, she loved Quinn. And by coming out to the club tonight, he figured this was the first step in creating a new normal, since his old one was never coming back. “To getting out of the house,” he decided on finally, holding his glass up to clink it against the other man’s, “and to beginning to move on.”

Darius: Darius held his glass up while he listened to Jesse’s toast, and he noticed the flicker of uncertainty in the man’s eyes when he said that, and realized that being there hadn’t been thateasy to begin with. He was good at reading people like that. He nodded and smiled softly at him. “That’s the best damn reason to toast to. Cheers.” He gulped down a goo portion of his drink, the burning taste pouring down his throat slowly before he put the glass down. “Whatever it is you’re moving on from, I’m sorry, man… I know taking the step is never  easy, but in the end it’s the best thing to do.” He shrugged. “I was pretty bummed out when I had to give the custody of my son to his mom. But I figured that I could either let it sink me, or just make something, someone better of myself. I know this isn’t the most glamorous job of all, not an acting career or anything like yours, but it’s made me happy, and most importantly  acomplished.”

Jesse: Jesse too took a sip of the drink, licking his lips afterwards. Darius was right, the scotch was very good, especially for someone who didn’t drink scotch often. He was generally a wine drinker, enjoying a glass or two with a meal or watching TV, but tonight he didn’t feel like more wine. He needed a break. He stared down at the glass as the other man spoke, surprised to hear he had a son. He didn’t seem like the type, but that was just stereotypes speaking. He paused, and then finally said, “my wife and I, we’re getting a divorce. It’s very recent.” There. Easy. He’d finally said it aloud to someone other than Rachel, and even that had only been in one conversation, “she had an affair. I thought we were happy, we were talking about families and the future.” He laughed bitterly and shook his head, rubbing the back of his neck with his hand.  “I’m sorry about your son,” he added honestly, “do you get to see him at all?”

Darius: Darius felt like he had babbled a bit too much with Jesse, who was basically someone he had just met, but in a way he didn’t feel awkward or  bad about, only hoping he didn’t bum the other man out with his verbal rant. But when he heard in return was him saying about his divorce, which was, to say the least, awful, especially when he said she had an affair. Double awful. He didn’t know the details of the whole thing, nor did he think he had to, but he felt Jesse had to feel broken, and worse, betrayed about that. “Uh.. yeah. Thanks. He’s fine with his mom though. She and I-” He shook his head. “It was a mistake. But my son wasn’t, and I hope to get to do enough to have him more in my life eventually.” He poured down some more scotch and shrugged. “Sorry about your wife. Really. I guess it’s not easy when you think you were fine, and then you weren’t. But all things happen for a good reason, I’ve always said, no matter how harsh they seem.” He chuckled softly. “And now I’m meddling. Sorry. I’ll shut up now. Hey, do you want anything to eat? We make the meanest subs in town here. In fact, if you choose to have one, I’ll prepare it myself. What’d you think?”

Jesse: Jesse couldn’t help but let out a short burst of laughter at that, though it was by no means an amused laugh. Mostly just sad. “Well, I don’t believe that. I can’t see one good thing that will come from this. Rachel and I… we were good together. Or I thought we were. I do hope you get to spend more time with your son then, but not everything happens for a reason.” He shook his head and downed his scotch in one go. Probably sacrilege considering the quality of the scotch. “It’s fine. Honestly, you’re the first person other than Rachel I’ve really spoken about this aloud to, so just tell me to shut up and I’ll shut up.” As if on cue, his stomach gave a loud lurch and he pursed his lips together in an attempt to stop the slight smile, “I suppose I could eat. But best drinks in town… meanest subs. You talk a big game.”

Darius: Darius’ face lit up with a big grin, his hand patting Jesse’s shoulder lightly. “It sure does. And it does for you, I’ll be there to say ‘haha, told you so’” He chuckled, then also finished his drink, from which didn’t have much left, then he looked at him and shrugged. “Have I been wrong so far?” he asked, pointing the man’s now empty glass, then stood up, which made him look as tall as he was. “Come on, let’s put some food in your stomach, and then you can try another thing to drink if you like. Something a lot more colorful, like tonight is.” He looked at the dance floor, everyone in there dancing and cheering with rainbow spotlights roaming all over the place to the beat of the music. He signaled the bartender that he was retiring for a moment, then led Jesse through the crowd to where the kitchen. “Are you vegan, or alergic to anything? I need to know before I start.” He chuckled as he washed his hands.

Jesse: Jesse scoffed but didn’t add anything more to the conversation. The other man didn’t know what he was talking about. Even if his life didn’t completely fall apart once their separation and divorce were made official, he couldn’t see anything good coming as a result of it all. Rachel was the one good thing in his life, save for his career. And right now, he didn’t have a show to focus his energy on, so it had just been Rachel. Rachel, who had been having an affair. Rachel, who he hadn’t noticed wasn’t happy. So Darius could say whatever he wanted, there was no way that this was all happening for a good reason, it was just cruel.

He followed Darius’ gaze to the dance floor where there was indeed a large amount of colour. Everything seemed to be rainbow, though he supposed it was pride month and that was to be expected. He cracked a small, wry smile to himself. How ironic it would be that he was spending the first night out after coming to terms with their separation in a club celebrating pride. Not that he had any qualms about celebrating it. He’d been with Rachel for years, but he’d been with a male member of Vocal Adrenaline before they’d even met, though he hadn’t advertised it. He supposed though, neither had Rachel. But the gender of the person she’d cheated on him with hardly mattered now.

“I suppose I could be persuaded to try a cocktail,” he replied, with an attempt of a smile to snap him out of his thoughts, “but only if your sandwich is good.” When Darius signalled for him to follow, he walked behind him through the crowd, in the direction of where he assumed the kitchen was. “Nope, not allergic or vegan or anything. I don’t like tomato though, but it won’t kill me.”

Darius: Darius wiped his hands with a cloth, then opened up the fridge. “Hold the tomatoes, got it. Well, I’m gonna do my best, so it’s only up to you if you like it or not, but I promise you can have your cocktail afterwards.” He pulled out a container that read ‘roast beef’ on the label, figuring that it would be a good thing to fill up the sandwich with, especially when served cold. Soon the counter was packing up with the vegetables and spices he wanted to add to the sandwich to make it more delicious, along with cheese and bacon to add to it. 

“You know… It’s not really been that long since I’ve heard of you. My son, Gabriel, he was watching YouTube videos one day, all of them monitored by me, of course, then we came across one ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’ one, and I thought ‘cool, another version of it!’, and it was you. Well, you and Vocal Adrenaline. Man, that was so cool… and coming from a Queen diehard fan that’s huge.” He chuckled, the roast beef and cheese already on one slice of parmiggian bread, while he waiting two minutes for the bacon to heat up a bit in the oven. “So then I watched several other videos of you, and also Rachel, and I found out about your careers on Broadway and all that… You know, far stretch from what I do, or am, so I thought that was awesome-” He added the bacon, lettuce, onion, black olives, along with a pinch of black pepper and salt, and some olive oil. “Did I just sound too much like a stalker?” he said with a laugh, then he placed the other slice of bread on top and cut it half, then fixed it all neat on the plate and handed it to him. “There you go. I hope you like it.”

Jesse: Jesse watched as Darius piled up the counter with multiple ingredients, and he was starting to think maybe he would live up to the high standards he’d put on the sandwich. He didn’t really care what it tasted like though, it was just nice to be out of the house and talking to an actual human for a change. Ever since Rachel had first told him, he’d been a little cooped up and now, he was by no means fine, but it was a start. And at least he could tell Artie he went out. Artie, who was first and foremost Quinn’s and Rachel’s friend but he knew that. The guy still seemed to worry about everybody though, and Jesse ultimately knew he was right. He needed to get out of the apartment and actually do something. He wouldn’t be himself if he didn’t. So here he was, sitting in the kitchen of a strip club of all places. 

His face lit up with surprise at Darius’ words, “no… I just didn’t know that video was out there. Or that you or anybody had seen it. I just assumed you’d heard about me through talking to Rachel. It’s how anybody knows me these days. And she’s a star, there’s a reason for that… but I didn’t realise you’d seen a video from my show choir days. Does your son like musicals? I might be able to get you both a couple of tickets to a more child friendly Broadway play if I happen to know the right people. If you’re interested.” He paused, and then realised how dumb that probably sounded and shook his head, “but I’m sure you could get them yourself if you’d wanted them. It’s not like your club isn’t packed… so never mind.” He accepted the sandwich from Darius, and took a bite from it, giving him a genuine smile afterwards, “it’s good, thank you. Aren’t you eating?”

Darius: Darius shrugged. “Actually, Rachel has never mentioned you to me. Sorry.” He knew that stung, but if they were already on their way to a separation, he might as well know it. “It’s really checking the web, or the media, and not seeing the two of you connected somehow.” He smiled and nodded. “Turns out he does, and a lot. He has watched The Wizard of Oz at least four times already, and also hums to the songs and dances around the room to it. Silly peanut…” He looked at him with wide open eyes, which made his already big eyes look like beams. “You could actually do that? No no, it’s okay! I’d love to go!- I mean, we’d love to go. I’ve never gone to a show on Broadway, so I wouldn’t miss it.” He was bothh glad about the invite, and the fact that Jesse had liked his sandwich, then chuckled. “You have a point. I’ll make myself one too.”

He made his own sandwich rather quickly, since the ingredients were already there, then he joined Jesse at the counter, also bringing two glasses of cool water for then to down the food. “Are you returning to Broadway sometime soon too? I’d also like to watch you up there, man. You should know how to command a stage- Or how’s that one go? You have stage presence, that one, yeah” he said as he took a good bite at his sandwich.

Jesse: Jesse looked down at his sandwich and gave a nod. Of course she hadn’t, why would she. No matter how many times Rachel had apologised - or tried to - it was still obvious what had gone wrong. Quinn had given her support through a time where Jesse clearly hadn’t, hadn’t even noticed she was hurting. So why she would have mentioned him to strangers he couldn’t have guessed. She probably had far more desire to talk about Quinn to anyone, that she ever had him. “Well, that’s about to change, I guess.” 

He chuckled, nodding, “yeah, I have connections over a few shows, I’m sure I could sort something out. You’ll have to let me know a time you know your son will be in town, and I’ll see if I can work out two tickets for then.” When Darius asked him if it was likely he’d return to Broadway, he shrugged. “Honestly… probably.” He took another bite of his sandwich and chewed thoughtfully for a few moments, “I’d been putting off returning to acting because I thought Rachel and I might plan a family soon. But my most recent jobs have been directing, and I’d love to return to acting again. On or off Broadway. It’d just be getting a part so I’ll have to talk to my agent, see what’s out there.”

Darius:  Darius nodded, excited about the fact that Jesse could actually get him tickets for him and Gabriel to a Broadway play. He would be sure to enjoy that night to the fullest when it happened. “I have him twice a month, on the weekends. He is coming on the 4th of July, so that means he should be back on… the 20th. Just so you know when he’s around.” He took a good bite at his sandwich and listened to what Jesse was saying. “If you ask me, it’d be the best you can do. Nothing like pouring your mind down to work when it’s troubled. Plus, the theater is missing a great performer each day that passes that you’re not on it. I’m sure you’ll do good, man.”

Jesse: Jesse couldn’t help but chuckle at that, “I can’t promise them that soon, depending on the show. Some shows set aside a few seats for family or the crew and cast and such, but since I’m not actually apart of any show right now, it may be a little longer than that. But I may get lucky, they may be vacant in a couple of weeks but if that’s his standard weekend I can work with that and see what I can do.” He shrugged at Darius’ words, “it’ll all depend on the roles that’s out there. I’m not going to slum for some role that isn’t good. I’d prefer to do a good Off-Broadway show than a terribly tacky Broadway show like Spongebob or Mean Girls,” he crinkled his nose in disgust. “Although I guess I should be aiming for Broadway since I have to pay rent on my own now, after we pay off the loan and split the sale of the apartment it should be enough for awhile though. What about you though, do you see yourself owning this place forever? Not saying anything against it,” he raised his hands in a surrender, “I was a dick the first time we spoke.”

Darius: It had striked Darius from the first minute that Jesse needed that chance to speak, to vent out everything that seemed to be cringing under his skin, and so he did just that, letting him talk and talk about his ideas, and takes on things, all while they both ate their sandwiches. “Off Broadway stuff is always the best way to get a jump  back start. Like, where the good stuff ends up coming up.” He shrugged. “I mean, so I’ve heard-” He drank a good portion of his water, his sandwich already about to disappear, and he looked up at him when he asked that, a small glint on his eyes when he smiled. “Well, first of all, I don’t own this place. I just manage it, which basically it’s like me owining it in a way, since the actual owner almost never comes here. I report to him everything that happens and what needs to be done. But in answer to your question… I’m actually in the middle of a negotiation to have something of my own. A casino-hotel property, in Atlantic City. Pause for effect-” He wiggled his eyebrows, then chuckled and had the last couple of bites of his sandwich.

Jesse: Jesse was surprised when Darius said he didn’t own the club, though he supposed he hadn’t really been paying attention to anything the other man had said when they first spoke online. He hadn’t exactly been in a great mood that day, given everything, and he’d taken it out on a few people he shouldn’t have. Some he didn’t regret, but he kept that to himself. Jesse nodded, impressed, “that’s pretty cool then. To go from managing a place to owning one. And you’re not going in blind, with your experience. Maybe I can be one of your first guests at the hotel, I could use a night away in Atlantic City. It’s like watered down Vegas. That wasn’t a criticism.” He took a large bite of his sandwich, swallowing before continuing, “will you be able to see your son as regularly though, when you move to New Jersey?”

Darius: Darius wiped his mouth with a napkin after he was done eating his sandwich, then looked at him and smiled, his face suddenly a bit brighter than it had been up until then. “Of course you can be. In factm if you also feel like performing one night stand thing, I’d also be honored to have you there. If it doesn’t meddle with your job, which I know there will be plenty of by that time.” He chuckled and waved a hand. “Don’t worry, I didn’t take it the wrong way. I’m glad there’s  a place much closer than Vegas, and in m any ways, much more affordable for some people. I hope things go well then though, we’ll see.” He shrugged. “That’s one of the main reasons too. I hope to move down there and maybe, just maybe, see about his custody again. Who knows-” He gave another shrug, then looked up to the kitchen door when it opened, the sound of music and cheers coming from the other side. Once he realized they were done with their sandwiches, and basically with their excuse to stay in the kitchen, Darius looked at him and nodded. “I’m keeping you here, when you could be having a good time out there. Sorry, man.”

Jesse: Jesse choked on the mouthful of sandwich he had at Darius’ words, coughing until he’d regained his breath. “Sorry,” he said, his voice hoarse, “did you…” He cleared his through, wishing they hadn’t finished their drinks at the bar, “did you just say a one night stand? I’m not… I’m… uhh. You know, going through a divorce. Not really looking for one night stands or otherwise. Um.” Jesse stared down at the counter, feeling awkward, “thanks though… I think?” He gave Darius a weak smile and nodded, “that would be good. Do you think his mother would take kindly to you trying to get full custody… aren’t you two on friendly terms for now?” He shrugged, “it’s fine. I’m not really in a party mood tonight. But it was nice to get out of the house, thanks for the drink, and the food. Although next time maybe I’ll have to try one of those ridiculous cocktails you boast about.”

Darius: Darius blinked in surprise when he saw Jesse’s reaction, and he quickly poured some more water into the other’s glass, but as he sort of mumbled the following words he couldn’t help but blush a bit, then chuckled and shook his head. “Wait, you thought that I…? Uh… no. That’s not what I mean, or meant. What I was talking about was, um… you performing a one night thing at the hotel, once it opens. I wasn’t talking about you and me- No. I know what you’re going through, so you don’t have to worry about that.” In a way it stung a little, to see that Jesse would consider that to be such a horrid thing, but to each their own. Glad they could divert from the topic he poured himself some more water and shrugged. “We’re friendly enough not to bite each other’s heads off whenever we talk stuff related to Gabriel, but it’s all good like that.” He leaned back and nodded. “You can still have one if you want to. You just have to ask the bartender for it.”

Jesse: Jesse let out a sigh of relief, and instantly felt embarrassed. “Well, you said one night stand! Not a one night show. I just…” He rubbed the back of his neck, feeling awkward, and pushed his empty plate forward, “sorry. It would have been nothing against you I’m just… still married. Still in love with my soon to be ex wife,” he admitted, which he’d barely said aloud to himself though he was sure it was obvious. This thing with Rachel was still so fresh and new, that nobody could have expected him to move on so quickly. Not when the feeling had never been mutual. He’d never thought their marriage was in trouble, never felt Rachel slipping away. Maybe he’d been caught up in his own things, but he’d just thought they had been busy. Busy, not drifting. But he’d been wrong, so wrong. 

“But, uhh, I’d be honoured. To perform,” he added, in case it hadn’t been clear what he was talking about, “if you do get the place in Atlantic City. Though I’m pretty sure the people visiting that place would much rather a female singer than a male singer belting out Broadway classics.” He glanced back out at the dance floor and shrugged, “maybe another night. This was nice, to get out, but I’m really not at the dance floor and bar by myself stage just yet.”

Darius: Darius stood up and moved a bit closer to where Jesse was, his hand patting the man’s shoulder and squeezing it just slightly. “Hey, it’s cool. You don’t have to explain anything to me. I can understand the feeling of being hung up on someone when it’s that fresh, but give it time. Soon women and men would be lining up to get with the Jesse St. James.” He shrugged when Jesse pointed out customers would prefer a female singing show. “We’ll get to that later. Plus, it’s my call, right?” He nodded and looked around. “Fair enough, but we should probably leave the kitchen. I have to. I have business to tend out there, but you’re welcome to stay at the bar if you want. Tonight it’s on the house, but try not to go too crazy.” He chuckled. “Shall we then?”

Jesse: Jesse couldn’t help but roll his eyes at Darius’ words, “yeah, Rachel said the same thing. But I’m really not thinking about that right now. I’d really rather not think about this apparent line of people.” He gave him a small smile and nodded, “yeah, I guess it is your call if you own the place. And of course, sorry. You must be busy. And don’t worry, I won’t drink you dry. I’ll probably just have one of those ridiculous cocktails you boast and head home.” He stood up from where he was sitting and instinctively dusted his hands off on his jeans and held out his hand for Darius to shake. “Thanks. For tonight, I needed to get out of the apartment.” They shook hands and he nodded at him, before turning and slipping out of the kitchen. True to his word, he tried one of the cocktails - bartenders recommendation - avoided anybody else, before heading home. It hadn’t been a wild night, but it had been a step into the right direction. At least, he hoped.

END SCENE.