#put the bulk of this under a cut because i dont want it to be obnoxious in the tags

[lucyramblessometimes]

I'm really intrigued by apple white in a metatextual sense actually... like, my feelings on her and those of others in the fanbase fascinate me

(Current) apple thoughts below the break:

she's a teenage girl; i have the staunch belief that there is nothing you can do at age 16 that makes you forever irredeemable to everyone. But also it would be foolhardy, actually, to fail to acknowledge that she's playing into some DANGEROUS ideology. This is concerning for everyone. we should be talking about that. but also she is just... CONSTANTLY being manipulated by every single adult in her life: her mother wants to live her own life over again through her -"OUR happily ever after"- Grimm plays her like a video game protagonist, watching her do every dumb thing he tells her, and the evil queen takes advantage of her being in a very vulnerable place emotionally to threaten her with the one thing she fears most: uncertainty. but ALSO she allows that fear to make her genuinely cruel to Raven at times, albeit largely unintentionally, despite Raven being her only really constant ally??? dragon games in particular is a really fascinating special to me because it shoves Apple into such an interesting light....

I think my opinions on her change a lot but I'm really intrigued by her and the ways she makes me and others feel in the fanbase. fascinating little lady

[bismuthburnsblue]

Help me design a dress!

this is our fabric! (left is the product image, right is my actual piece of fabric- ruler on the left is cm, on the right is inches, to give you an idea of print scale) its the black version of the break up robe print, in a lightweight & crisp cotton. i have 4.5m (5y) so it should be enough to make most designs, though some will require consideration in the cutting- we will get to that later though. (the fabric is also narrow, i think its only 110cm wide. (its still folded in the picture))

my goal here is to make a comfy wearable dress, something pretty casual & everyday in silhouette, but i would also like if it was possible to style up for a more formal look. most of my inspiration for this project has come from 1950s dresses, because thats a style i lean towards for myself, though im not aiming for anything "true vintage" or anything. im also fond of lolita dresses, so im more than down to draw inspiration from those also!

also, the print is pretty bold compared to my usual style, so ive considered doing some kind of translucent (chiffon, tulle, mesh) overlay to tone it down so its more wearable in my wardrobe. this will entirely depend on it working with out final design, and even then, ill offer you the decision at the end! ultimately, i still want to be able to appreciate the fabric. (for sewing people: id intend to do it as a flat lining, so it sits right up against the fabric underneath, not as a complete separate layer. i find this makes it block out the design slightly less) doing this could also help with adding structure to the dress, which i already think some designs might need, considering how thin the fabric is.

ok now the brief is out of the way, onto the first decision for the dress: the shape of the skirt. if you want to vote based entirely on vibes, feel free to click away, but i have included some more writing about each option & its ups and downs in this particular project under the cut (also pictures of each style if youre not so familar with what they are!)

& the propaganda for the options:

Circle skirt: you can never go wrong with a circle skirt- theyre probably my favourite to wear overall & i especially like the low bulk join to the waist as i sometimes find things with gathers dont sit as nicely on me. the way circle skirts are cut also gives them a movement that the other two methods simply cannot compete with in my eyes.

The main downside is working a circle skirt with this particular fabric. the fabric is not wide enough to cut the entire front as one, so i would either need a centre front seam or to make it a 3/4 circle skirt- something im 100% ok with, i honestly find at midi length a full circle to be too much sometimes. (there is technically the option to have full circle but rotate it so the seams are at side, but that might then mean i have to do some shenanigans with where the fastenings go). also, because the design is directional, each quarter will need to be cut so the seams end up on the bias, which makes for an Incredibly inefficient cutting layout. (again, if theres a CF seam, thatll be on the diagonal of the design, which really defeats the point of putting in the effort in the first place, to me.) i think i would be able to get all the panels i need out of the piece of fabric i have, but i think i would be a bit more limited with top options as i try to make sure to use as many of the small pieces left over as possible.

Gathered skirt: these are by far the easiest to do in terms of sewing. in my research into casual 50's dresses about 90% of all pictures i saw featured a dress with a gathered skirt (or actually, a lot seemed to have tiny pleats that give the effect of gathers, like the coral one. if we vote this way, i would be tempted to go try them as i think it might solve my bothers with gathered skirts in general)

i generally find gathered skirts less flattering on me- they add bulk at the waist and then hang straight down off the hips (when not puffed up with a petticoat) and thats generally not something i like on myself. i could improve that though by bringing more fabric in to increase the hem, and adding horsehair braid to the hem to help it swoop without additional support (again, my goal for this project is causal day dress)

this pattern uses the least fabric i think, depending on how much you put in the skirt- i think i should get a perfectly satisfactorily full skirt from this with less than 2m of fabric used. (honestly might end up too efficient- id like to use up all the fabric i have in this, and i really dont need that much for a bodice. i can see myself adding 4, even 5 widths into the skirt to use up yardage. i dont particularly see that as a problem though)

despite my reservations because of gathered skirts ive made before, for this project it does have one massive point in its favour: the fact that its still a full piece of fabric. all other styles here all cut quite significantly into the design to create their shape, while this be one panel of the fabric from edge to edge. preserving the design of this fabric is pretty high on my priority list, after all, i bought this fabric specifically because it was the OFMD break up robe print. i want whatever design i make to work with that.

Tiered skirt: for me, tiered skirts are the best of both worlds in terms of the effect they give. the fact each layer doubles means they keep some of the swish a circle skirt gives (and, i find, they tend to have more of the A-Line shape of a circle skirt too) while not being quite so consuming of fabric as you cut. i couldnt find many examples of 50's dresses with them (though i did find some) so i do feel like this style pulls more towards the style of lolita dresses & that might be reflected in the options i offer in subsequent rounds.

if you know anything about petticoats, then youll notice that this style of skirt is essentially the same construction as them (though petticoats often introduce extra layers and ruffles and.....) when ive made this style of skirt in the past i have found that it holds volume much like a petticoat does, without the need for an extra undergarment- something thats great for a casual dress!

I was thinking three tiers is the ideal number for this dress, though i could make it only two. i dont think i would make it more as, if i keep them even (which was my intention, though i am also fond of the styles that increase with each tier like my example images) then each tier will probably be 20cm wide, which is already looking like itll cut into the features of the design. i think that is the single biggest downside for this style- i wont reasonably be able to do much 'fussy cutting' either to work with the print, its simply not practical to do on this scale.

At a rough estimate, i think this is gonna use 3m of fabric in the skirt, which puts it slap bang in the middle in terms of fabric efficiency. i should have plenty enough to do it, maybe even to increase it if i want to, while still being pretty unlimited about what i do with the rest of the design.

one last thing- trim! one unique feature of this design is the opportunity to play with trim on the skirt itself. i do have some bodice ideas that play around with trim, and it would be really nice to introduce it into the skirt too, if we go that way. it could even be a fun nod to the piping on the original break up robe!!!!

Something else (comment): while doing my research i came across SO MANY design ideas that i could play around with. for this poll i picked the three i thought would probably work the best for this project, but i wanted an opportunity for you to yell at me if you want something different entirely. feel free to suggest anything you like, but ive included a couple images as examples of styles i saw a lot. i especially saw a lot like on the left, with gathering or ruffles off to the side, but the front panel being pretty flat. this might be real fun for some designs like shirtdresses, but im not super confident on how itd look on me. either way, feel free to form a coalition in the replies to tell me how i totally should have offered you this one particular option.

(if you vote for this but dont comment, im discounting it from the overall stats as i have no idea what design you mean! your welcome to send it in on anon if that bothers you, but either way, ill need a description :P )

[aihoshiino]

I saw recently you said that you dont like the current version of akane, and I honestly agree. But what are your reason you dont like post tb akane

Hello anon, sorry for the wait!!! I have actually been pecking at the response for this all week because it ended up dovetailing into some of my broader thoughts and issues with the manga using my feelings about Akane's characterization as a sort of lens/jumping off point. I hope this is still interesting to read even though it took forever to answer lol.

I also want to note that the bulk of this post was written before chapter 128! Some of my issues that are mentioned in this post did get sort of poked at and paid some lipservice in a way that makes me hopeful we'll get some improvement on this stuff as the movie arc progresses. Think of this as 'my pre-128 thoughts' if you come across it in like a post chapter 130 world in the distant future. It's also uh fucking long (it was over 2000 words long when I stopped counting.....) so enjoy this mini essay???

To get my most neutral thoughts out of the way up front, Akane is a character I really like in LoveNow! I think the arc she's given is compelling and her struggles feel super real. The gradual peeling back of her outer layers and the reveal that she's just as damaged by the industry as the people around her was really good and my only real major problem with LN is that I felt like the aftermath of her suicide attempt (at least, emotionally speaking) was glossed over a bit too quickly for my liking. On top of that, I like a lot of ideas about TB Akane on paper and I'm not inherently against any of the things that get put on the table in relation to her. My issues are more to do with the ways Akasaka executes said ideas and – imo – fails to capitalize on a lot of the interesting potential that a character like Akane presents.

I think this issue partially stems from the fact that Akane and Memcho were (iirc anyway) not actually originally intended to stick around with the main cast past the LoveNow arc. Memcho didn't really have a personal arc during LoveNow and during the rest of the manga, she sort of has a "flat" arc, so I think she makes the transition a lot more gracefully. Which is not to say Memcho herself is a flat character lol! Rather a 'flat' arc is when a character doesn't necessarily have some major change in themselves, but their intrinsic traits/beliefs/etc help to advance the arcs of characters around them; sort of like a mentor type character, if that helps.

Akane, by contrast, had a pretty dynamic character arc that felt as though it was intended to be relatively self contained and conclusive but with Akasaka's plans changing behind the scenes, Akane has ended up sort of outlasting the arc she was originally set up to have. That's not to say a character can't still be relevant after their arc is done or that a character needs an active ongoing arc to work within a story but there's a lot of things about the way that arc is simply not resolved that bug me – for example, the arc wrap makes a big point of saying that Akane will probably have to deal with ongoing online negativity for the rest of her career but this never comes up again even in places where it really should be relevant. I also just personally am not a big fan of how quickly and completely Akane's suicide attempt gets swept under the rug and is literally never addressed again once LoveNow wraps but that's more of an issue with OnK's bad habit of dropping loose threads a whole than it is something specific to Akane.

As for the rest of it… uh, this might be a bummer to see in the main tag if Akane is your Oshi no Girlie so I'll put the rest of my thoughts behind a cut. Akane enjoyers, please feel free to pretend I'm just talking about my favourite ice cream flavours or something. Or even go get some ice cream yourself and say it's on me. I don't care if it's October, ice cream is a forever food!!!

SO… To get the most immediate and shallow points off the table first, I just find the character design change between LoveNow and TB Akane really jarring lol. Like, I guess it's not necessarily impossible for her hair to have grown down to her chest in the time between LoveNow and when she pops back up but that combined with the changes in how she starts being characterized really just widen that gulf. The only time she ever really feels like LoveNow Akane to me again is when she takes Aqua to see a 2.5D play and is just so happy afterwards that he enjoyed it – that's cute! That's charming! That's the Akane I liked a lot in LoveNow and I feel like we don't really see her again after that but it's hard to put my finger on what feels so off. It's kind of just Vibes.

Getting into more serious, structural stuff a big part of why I feel post-TB Akane falls flat for me is simply that a lot of the interesting things Aka put on the table for her during LoveNow have been swept away and ignored. There are so many things that could be done with Akane as a character that are absolutely screaming out with incredible thematic potential but Akasaka hasn't really taken advantage of any of them. At the worst points of the manga, it feels like she's being used as a blunt force tool to make the plot go at the speed Akasaka wants it to progress and this has resulted in Akane spending a good chunk of the story doing literally nothing on-panel that doesn't revolve around Aqua in some way. Everything else – her rivalry with Kana, her passion for acting, her relationship with her family and her manager – is paid the barest bits of lipservice if it's even acknowledged at all but when you really get down to the nitty gritty of what Akane meaningfully engages with and achieves in most arcs now exclusively has to do with Aqua.

It's not inherently a bad thing for a character to be motivated by outside factors or for their actions to be driven by devotion or even hatred for somebody else – Aqua himself is a good example of a character whose arc is driven by both of these things, as his devotion to Ai and hatred for the man who hurt her are the main external things driving him through pretty much the entire story so far. But Aqua also has things going on outside of this – other important connections and relationships, feelings and conflicts and motivations that make him feel, imo, more well realized. Not only that, but his arc has a very well conveyed and easy to understand "want vs need" conflict, of his continued pursuit of revenge having clear and tangible friction with his emotional need to let go of his past trauma and move on.

Akane has, since Tokyo Blade, been sorely lacking in a lot of these areas. Her acting career progresses entirely offscreen with no apparent conflict or effort on her part and she has absolutely no strong or meaningful connections to the cast outside of Aqua and arguably Kana, but they haven't really had any sort of meaningful or meaty interactions since way back around, what, the mid-70s, in chapter terms? Not only that but her existing relationships have largely been completely put to the wayside, too. LoveNow establishes her as a person who cares deeply for the people who care for her – her mom, her manager, her friends on the show. Akane felt so bad about people saying bad things about her mom and her manager online – not even harassment actually directed at them, or that we have any reason to believe they saw or received! – that it contributed to her suicide attempt. Contrast this to when she is literally about to walk off and attempt a literal actual fucking murder and all she's thinking is "aqua… let's have crepes together… let's be together forever…". No consideration for her parents, who are about to go through unimaginable pain, or the promising acting career she's about to destroy? Nope! Akane revolves entirely around Aqua now. It feels insulting!

I don't even necessarily hate or even disagree with taking Akane in the direction of her fixating on Aqua in response to him saving her and feeling like she has to cling to him and throw away her life to 'save' him in return. I do think the story is purposely portraying this as an unhealthy fixation and does not want us to uncritically celebrate this aspect of their relationship but I also just think the story kind of fails to really examine Akane to the logical conclusion of that flaw.

In general, Akane is one of those characters who like… I don't quite know how to express this feeling so forgive me if I go in circles on this topic a bit, but there are occasions where Akane will do or say something genuinely shitty or deranged or display a pattern of behaviour that speaks clearly to a flaw of hers in ways I want to be on board and engaged with but as time passes, it becomes clear that the narrative does not actually see anything wrong with what just happened and so it never gets addressed or meaningfully engaged with. There's a lot of little bits like this (can we talk about how Akane leveraged her suicide attempt against Aqua as a manipulation technique in TB and this never comes up again?? lol???) but the thing that really truly sticks in my craw is the way Akane is repeatedly depicted as continuing to use her fake 'Aikane' persona (as conveyed by the star eyes) during her acting career and starts getting famous at least partially because of it.

This is going to sound really dramatic but as someone who deeply, deeply cares about Ai and is so, so compelled by the tragedy that was her exploitation in life and death – this is so horrifying! This is Akane directly profiting off her exploitation of Ai's image. This is Akane digging up Ai's corpse so she can rip out her guts and parade around wearing them. It is absolutely baffling to me that the story at no point pauses to at least acknowledge that this is another way in which Ai is being exploited even in death – that even now, almost twenty years later, she cannot ever escape or be left to rest in peace as a human being.

Honestly Akane's relationship to Ai is SUCH a mountain of missed opportunities it makes me kind of crazy. Like, we get some wishy-washy stuff about ~Ai's emotions that were revived in her~ but seemingly the only thing done with that is to give Akane a cheat code to magically know things about the mystery she should have no reasonable way of deducting. But like - if Akane really does understand Ai so completely and it's so empathetic that she can Sherlock scan the emotions of a dead woman she had never met then why does she never, you know… express any kind of opinion on her? What does Akane think of Ai? What does she think about the way Ai was exploited and abused by the very industry Akane is trying to break into? Holy shit! It should be SO obvious to draw a parallel between Ai's death at the hands of a ex-fan and Akane's suicide attempt driven by fan harassment. But Akane just… never talks about Ai or even really treats her like a person even though she apparently downloaded Ai into her brain by reading Wikipedia really hard.

It's frustrating because there SHOULD be a really great thematic idea here - other characters often treat Ai as this inscrutable enigma but with Akane, there was the opportunity to make a point that Ai was just a lonely, messed up person and that if Akane can come to understand and connect with her post mortem then the people in her life absolutely could have put in the effort to understand and connect with her while she was still alive. The story failing to have Akane treat Ai even the slightest bit like a person ends up making her feel really callous in a way that was clearly not intentional and is, as a result, frustrating to read. This also comes into play in the ways she's so tunnel visioned on Aqua. Like, there's just something really darkly funny about Akane acknowledging how insanely unimaginably tragic the horror of Ai's death is and the way the people closest to her were robbed of the opportunity to publicly heal and grieve and then she just... totally fails to acknowledge Ruby also experienced this life altering trauma? LIKE

"your little sister is on her own, though"

To be clear, Akane being callous and kind of tunnel-visioned is not in of itself something I have a problem with. As a Category 5 Women's Wrongs Enjoyer (my list of favourite fictional women includes Monika DDLC, Akane Shinjo and Junko Enoshima lol) so I actually think Akane having those sorts of nastier flaws or at least having blinders up that make her behave in such a way that contrasts her actually heart would be so good and juicy! It would be a really good opportunity to dig into ideas of like... someone can go through something horrible that negatively impacts them and maybe even makes them behave in poor and destructive ways, but just because someone isn't a 100% pure and sympathetic 'perfect' victim doesn't at all take away from the fact that they were victimized and they still deserve to be helped and protected. But because the story seems to be largely unaware that Akane comes off like this, it fails to be meaningfully engaged with which, again, makes it frustrating to read.

I do have hope that a lot of these issues will be resolved, though! The AquAkane breakup finally forcefully ripped her out of the role of 'Aqua's Perfect Girlfriend' and while she's still orbiting him a bit more than I necessarily would like, chapter 128 has already done a lot to address some of these issues. Even stuff as small as Akane talking to Memcho and Kana and not really having any page time with Aqua and her acknowledging that both Aqua and Ruby (with particular emphasis on Ruby, it seems!) are both still suffering in the aftermath of their childhood trauma. It's small, but a lot of my issues with Akane were of the 'death by a thousand cuts' variety so even having them addressed in these passing ways does a lot to help.

Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if I eventually come around on Akane and end up liking her a lot more. I've sort of had similar feelings about characters in works I like before – off the top of my head, I remember really disliking Naoto from Persona 4 when I first played the game because the section of the story she's associated with has some really bullshit pacing and Naoto is used in some really awkward ways by the narrative that made me associate those feelings of frustration with her. I felt similarly about Megumi from 13 Sentinels where I felt like some of the beats in her story dragged down both her arc and the arcs of the characters associated with her and really disliked her as a result. Upon revisiting both games though, I was able to properly separate my feelings of frustration with the narrative from the characters themselves and ended up coming around on both of them in a huge way.

Once Oshi no Ko wraps and we can see what Akane's arc looks like in its entirety, I fully expect to have a similar turnaround on her. I don't expect that she'll ever be one of my favourite characters but once we can see the totality of her character arc and the full scope of her role in the story, I expect to find more appreciation for her. Right now, though, while I'm still sort of stewing in disappointment, hope, expectation and frustrations it's hard to fully come around on her.

[tstwitterupdates]

I feel like (imo from being a creative and having life get in the way) Thomas plotted out s2 and how it was supposed to go a long time ago and then his whole fricken world changed. Cause like, first it was the production company, then Joan and Talyn, then several health scares, then a relationship and a breakup, and, obviously, and entire pandemic and a hurricane ruining part of his studio. And that's just the stuff externally. So I get why it's taking so long, cause he wants to make it perfect, and he can't change his plans for s2 at this point, because it will ruin basically everything. Plus, with Into the Unknown and the among us videos, right, it's clear he's trying his best to put content out there. So I can understand where he is.

I think I'm just frustrated because I miss when we had stuff like Thomas and Friends content, like Real or Fake Anime or Joystick Joyride and stuff. I feel like the Sides/Cartoon Therapy wait would be less painful if we were getting a bit more content on that end, you know? Cause while it's been a long time, I still feel like it would've mitigated the pain seeing him a little more frequently. Plus, I think Roleslaying would feel less odd if there was other content going out around as often as the once-a-week uploads for a month or so, rather than it being basically all the content we see from him, now.

I know Thomas is also getting to a better place with bulk recording an the like, and I'm genuinely still excited to see what's coming up. It just sometimes feels like Thomas is hyperfocusing on the big projects, and not letting himself enjoy the stuff that makes the bigger projects feel more substantial, if that makes sense.

i kinda agree im not sure i haven’t made up my mind on this. i liked the videos with his friends before but they’ve also gotten so extra that i no longer watch them either, im now one of those fans just waiting for sanders sides. but i do wish he would make simpler fun things either small sanders sides episodes or small vlogs. i miss his vlogs. but mostly because of nostalgia, those things made me company through the worst years of high school lol. anyway getting off topic.

i do think thomas is trying his best, i do not doubt that in the slightest. but even when you try your best if you don’t have a good strategy the results might not be the best. but i dont know what their strategy is so i can’t judge i guess.

more asks and replies under the cut

yeah like. they pushed the limits of what they could do with what they had back since accepting anxiety. and then they got better equipment and staff and stuff and instead of saying “now we can do the same things in less time and with less effort” they went “now we can do even bigger things that push our limits just as much!”

which is their decision to make not mine but i assume that’s where some of that stress might be coming from.

yes i agree with all of this. there’s some blogs that have posted criticism or defenses against criticism that i just find incredibly mean spirited or that make good points but phrase it in aggressive ways i don’t like.

i think whichever opinion you have it’s best to be open minded. acknowledge our own feelings and talk about them without attacking anyone. it’s okay to feel frustrated and angry and then we’re responsible about what we do with those emotions. and i think it’s cool to talk about them with other fanders that have felt the same. just stay open minded about what others have to say and then make up your mind about how much you agree or disagree.

and keep in mind that we know nothing about how thomas and co work. on both sides. like you cant claim their workflow is perfect nor claim it’s horrible because we just don’t know. but we can say we’re feeling disappointed or bored or annoyed or whatever because those are our own feelings.

yeah again this is my blog and i post what i want. and im doing my job by tagging and warning them.

and also thomas is a grown man in his thirties who has been a social media personality for, what? maybe almost a decade? im sure he knows how to be responsible about it and not go digging to read criticism of his work to get hurt by it. or at least i hope so. if he doesn’t then that’s out of my hands as well. and the hundreds of people supporting him on the replies of all his tweets more than make up for a handful of blogs that make angry posts every once in a while.

yes that’s understandable. but i still don’t know. if thomas has these personal problems that are so serious that they cause his content to come sooo slowly and still cause him to have this much stress then he should probably just take a huge actual break. and let us know about it. without necessarily telling us the reason of course.

if after Putting Others First or the last Asides he had said “hey im going on a hiatus for big projects like sanders sides and cartoon therapy while i figure stuff out, but i’ll film x kind of content because it requires less effort and i enjoy it” or even that the entire channel is going on hiatus, and then he came back like a year later and said “okay we’re back first thing we’re doing is writing the finale script!” or whatever then that would have been less frustrating than this. even if it had taken the same 3 years. because at least afterwards you know that he’s better and the wait would be worth it. at least that’s my opinion.

[biscuitsngravie]

vent under cut // disability, injury

sometimes i wish i was just born with the disabilities i have now. like, im sure that i was already disabled to an extent (most teenagers don't get sick once a month for a year i dont think) but it's like

when ppl say ur one accident away from houselessness or disability they're right. cause after my first car accident i was mostly "fine" (fine enough to walk home instead of taking the ambulance cause i was scared of the cost). i was lucky that i ended up working from home for that year coincidentally enough. credit score? shot. finances? shot. but i could still "function" mostly.

then there was my second car accident. being the passenger, that quote about passengers getting the bulk of injury? yeah. couldnt walk, couldnt stand, could barely breathe. but i did it. did my at home exercises and learned how to mostly do things again. like yeah my back hurts more often than not, and i cant stand for as long as i used to, and there are these weird pains all over my torso sometimes, but im "fine."

then that fucking ladder months after my second accident. if those two didnt take me out, the ladder sealed the deal. barely able to do anything by lie down and stretch my muscles as needed. constantly on painkillers just to go to exist. and after months of physical therapy (i had to go to myself because it wasn't "far enough" to be covered, which included a minimum of an hour walk and occasionally more) im deemed good enough to go back to work for one hundred percent care. yay me.

im "totally" healed, right? buuuuut i just gotta do these back exercises every day for the rest of my life to stand and oh yeah, im at risk of scoliosis now. im "good as new," right? yeah for sure, i just need to take some form of painkiller on occasion because all the places that "used" to hurt (they never really stopped hurting) will have flair ups and, oh would you look at that, i cant walk today. i cant stand today. i cant breathe today.

im so tired. jobs dont take me seriously cause im not legally registered as disabled. but if i even put on the application or mention that ive at the minimum history of disability, they ask me if i can "handle" the job. they send me emails saying they "filled the position." so since im not "really" disabled they can just basically give me bullshit. and i would register, and i wanna register so bad! i want a prescription for a wheelchair, to get a proper crutch, or crutches when both my knees arent being agreeable. i wanna be able to sit in the fucking disability spot on the bus without people staring at me to get up just because someone with a visible disability came in or an elderly person walked on.

im tired of having to pretend that im not in constant fucking pain because im so young. young people arent disabled. black women arent disabled.

but its also so scary. to prove disability is one of the most frightening and dehumanizing processes ive heard of. even when i was doing the claim after i fell off the fucking ladder did prove to be a hassle. and that was in my favor. the fact that ive been working is definitely not gonna help the situation. "if disabled, why work? 🤔"

theres also the savings cap. i have trips i wanna go to, places i wanna be. having a savings cap on being a recipient of disability is actually asinine. theyre pushing to raise and it and GOD i hope that bill goes through.

they basically fuck you over if you're married so there goes my aspirations of partnering ig. countries that wont let you cause ur disabled. countries that wont let you immigrate because of disability. its all so much.

this is all so fucked and this system is so fucked and its so tiring. i just honestly wish i was just born with whatever i have going on right now so that id know what to do. i just woke up one day and now i have an entire routine just to exist and i just wish it was already part of my life in some way ig. idk.

part of me is so mad. why did i listen to those people pressure me to get a car? why did i have to comment on missing that turn? why did they try to make that turn? why didnt i just, idk, not fall off the ladder hello?? why didnt i just take the medical debt from the hospital? would i be able to walk better or get care or get a case and be approved if i just kept going to the hospital instead of working?

hell, those fuckers at the original emergency room didnt even touch me, saying that i'll "bounce back because [i'm] young." its been a year now. theres not fucking "bouncing back."

i cant fucking walk as well as i used to. i cant stand some days. some days i have to practice how to breathe. i just wish that instead of having repeated trauma i was just born with it or something so that this isnt new. i hope that doesnt come off as ignorant as fuck or rude. idk how else to word it.

i wonder about if i can even take the sports i want to next year. or if i can even work at this new job that wants me to work all these hours a week. idk. working all those hours a week is ridiculous anyway. if the accidents didnt disable me that shit wouldve eventually anyway ig. guess i just got a head start. look at me, an overachiever. i did next week's work, too, teacher.

i feel like if i could get diagnosed or if i got diagnosed as a child that i'd be "legit." that i woudlnt have to "prove" to anyone that im disabled. i hate telling people i hurt and hearing about how much i "dont know about." or hear "wait till ur older." im tired of having to constantly tell ppl that young ppl can hurt, too, just to divulge in my medical history to "prove" that im "actually" disabled. im so tired. i just wanna say my knee hurts and someone passes me an ibuprofen or acetaminophen.

[scrollypoly]

Okay trying this again. I finished reading that document, and im going to try and go over my thoughts and hit all my points again.

This is all just for the main callout being shared, though i have been sent more i am going to read later on. All my knowledge of this is from this document.

EDIT: not seeing the document anymore so im just gonna put a link so anyone can access it and understand why im saying these things about it.

EDIT (march 25): Alex has made a response to this document here

1. The document is a mess, but it does have some points that have credibility and real concern. Im going to hit those first so that no one misses them.

TL;DR: Alex has had inappropriate interactions and relationships with some users in discord servers, some of which are minors. This includes threatening suicide, sharing sexual photos without consent, and having inappropriate parasocial relationships with various users. Alex is shown to be struggling with their mental health greatly and i believe their patterns of that mental health struggle has lead to them seeking comfort and positive interactions from other users, despite the relationship they have to these users as a creator.

If you just wanted to know what the callout was for, there ya go! I read the whole thing and that is a summary of the main credible points of concern that i read. Now im going to go into the messier parts of this document under the cut

2. My trust in this document is unfortunately skewed to not trusting it. The bulk of the first part is centered around the authors romantic relationship with Alex, and what i gleaned from that is really just. Alex is struggling a lot with their (gonna use neutral pronouns because i dont know which ones they would prefer, so if someone lets me know otherwise ill change it) mental health, and that is what lead to the events of that relationship. I understand that struggle greatly, especially with the struggle to break the cycle and find professional help. I honestly really dislike this first part, both parties sounded complicit in the issues of the relationship, from miscommunication to boundary issues. I also do not agree with starting off such a long callout post with your relationship issues, unless it comes down to smth that can be an actual threat to others. A callout post should be for warning others of a dangerous or malicious individual, not for talking about how bad your relationship was, and it tarnishes the credibility of the document by showing immediate reason for a negative bias towards the subject. I dont say this to condemn or fault the author, truly i know what that feels like to be in such a relationship with those struggles and be hurt from it. Something of this intent though just isnt the place.

3. I hate, hate, hate how screenshots are used in callouts and this is exactly why. Almost all of these screenshots are unhelpful; they are either one single message, don't relate to where their postition is in the document, do not support what is being told or shown in the document, or are just unrelated or extraneous to the information we're given. Ive already seen a few people talk about how these screenshots were edited, and while i do think theyre not edited and truthful, i can see where those users are coming from. If you use screenshots in a callout, they need context and more information and actually useful information. Literally, pictures that are presented as evidence are entirely blocked out and censored; why even bother with showing them as evidence?? Some of these dont support your claims and honestly even refute some of your claims.

4. I still believe that this document is transphobic. I dont care about what Alex has said, and honestly i dont really care if they said it was a joke either, as their talk in these screenshots is wishy washy and appeasing at times, and it honestly doesnt matter how Alex identifies. Most of the screenshots that show Alex engaging with their gender identity and presentation have no sexual content or implications in them at all. It is literally just a person engaging in transfeminine clothing and outlets and it is being called predatory. There are a select few near the very end that are sexual in nature and content, but i cannot connect the sexual behavior that is shown to the entirety of Alex's transfeminine experience. Calling transfeminine people, even people that just appear transfeminine and might not be, predatory for simply dressing femininely and engaging with identifying as female is shit behavior to do. You can call Alex out for valid concerns and inappropriate behavior without calling into question the validity of their trans identity and experiences, and maligning their transfeminine idenity. Do that instead of perpetuating transmisogynistic rhetoric.

5. So much of this document is just. Not good. I was honestly about to call the whole thing as bullshit for a bit, because the actual harmful actions are at the very end of a very long document, and there was finally some credible evidence alongside it. If anyone wants to read it for their self, just be prepared for that. But yes, this callout is here for a reason, and shows that some pretty shitty actions had been committed. And, of course, there are other documents and posts now circulating as well. As far as i know rn, Alex has not made a statement. I don't have a Twitter, so that skews my view as well.

Basically. Idk what else to say really. Support those who were hurt by Alex's actions, give the benefit of the doubt to any victims that come out. But also just. Read the information being given, please. Have some responsibility and integrity for the information you spread, and dont just mindlessly share callout posts like this. Know what youre talking about before you reblog callout posts about anybody

Ok, with the whole thing about alex kister rn . . . Begging yall to actually read that callout for once, cuz im only halfway through it rn but it reeks of transmisogynistic bullshit. Especially after what happened to so many transfemmes on this site

[plutowrites]

just had a thought mm indulge me plz. costco shopping with dad!levi. i really feel like he would prefer buying stuff in bulk over going to the regular grocery store multiple times a week. your kids are sitting in the little buggy and he's driving them around. we're all on the consensus that his kids are well-behaved, right?

stop it this is so sweet to me omg 😭 growing up goin to costco was so much fun and it was a whole event bc i have a huge family and we'd all go tg and then eat lunch at the little food court place afterwards. i looked forward to costco days every time bc of the free samples and the books section!! they had so many discounted books! yeah costco is v special to me LMAO

I agree with Levi wanting to do big grocery trips over spreading multiple smaller trips over the course of a couple weeks, it's just more convenient this way. does he like the over crowdedness and oftentimes messy environment that is costco wholesale centre? no, not at all but the kids really seem to enjoy it, they think it's so cool that there's literally everything you could want all in one place. They love looking at the mega sized giant stuffed bears (i'll include a pic under the cut idk if this is just a north america thing) and levi is forced to endure the short jokes that arise.

"dada look it's bigger than you!" said in a very innocent, harmless manner but Levi is SICK to his stomach. during pillowtalk hours he's gonna bring it up to you like is THIS what you're teaching OUR kids, fck you fr.

i do agree his kids are v well behaved but i dont think it's because they're necessarily scared of their dad, i think they just take after his calm demeanour a lot. if levi senses they're getting restless though, he'll be like 'okay quick go run to the dairy section and get 2 bags of milk' and he just stays put and watches them.

also the kids THINK they can sneak in junk food in the cart without him noticing but he sees their chubby little hands drop the occasional treat in the cart every single time it happens. it's costco, everything is jumbo sized so it's cute they think no one can hear the big PLONK! noise of the 24 pack of chocolate chip cookies hitting the bottom of the buggy. he wont say anything until he's placing the groceries on the conveyor belt and he just clicks his tongue and mutters something like "hide this from your mom." with a small smile on his lips.

he's also the dad that like picks up articles of clothing and tells his kid to come over so he can size it up against their body. like he'll see a pajama shirt and think to himself yeah they need something like this and he'll pick up a few different sizes and hold it up to see how it looks. PLUS he thinks its funny to pick up sizes that are either way too small or way too big and go "this is perfect for you brat." and his kid will just roll their eyes because he does this EVERY time. his version of a lame dad joke.

edit: omg i forgot to add the BEARS

[lazywitchling]

I mean... I could tell you that blue cheese is good for prosperity, but if you hate blue cheese and wonder how anyone could eat mold, you’re gonna end up dealing with the “old and rotting” property instead of the “thriving and flourishing” property. (I mean idk, that’s my hypothesis)

On anons suggestion, I was wondering about cheddar acting as a wealth component. But like... what kind of cheddar? A ten year aged cheddar? HELL yes! But what about the mild bulk industrially produced cheddar that comes in a 40 lb block and sometimes has white spots on it from where the yellow dye didn’t quite mix in? Does that count for wealth?

No?

But what if you’re living paycheck to paycheck and that industrially made bulk cheddar IS a luxury? Does it count for wealth now?

I guess what I’m saying is that... cheese is my career, it is my area of study and expertise. I couldn’t write a “cheese correspondences” list, because it’s not that cut and dry. (For me, at least.) I can’t tell you the correspondence of Parmigiano Reggiano, because it depends entirely on the wheel. I’ve worked with wheels that survived the big earthquake in Italy back in 2012, and I’ve worked with wheels that sat in warehouses for months upon months longer than usual because of what quarantine did to demand. Mystically and not-mystically speaking, those wheels have a vastly different vibe/essence about them than the ones that are able to age properly and move from production to consumer in a timely manner.

I could try to tell you the properties of goat cheese, but... which goat cheese? The local one where I’ve met the cheesemaker and the goats, seen the milking facility and the rolling lakeside hills where the goats graze? Or the vacuum sealed industrial one that’s clearly being packaged before it’s finished ripening in order to keep up with a sudden massive demand during covid-panic-shopping?

(Unrelated to witchery: Seriously, next time you’re at the grocery store, check out the fresh goat cheese logs. I bet you they’re pretty damn soft, almost squishy. Usually they’re more firm, able to be crumbled off the log easily. Now they’re coming in almost liquid. Manufacturers are trying to keep up with massive demand as people make more and more food at home, but you can’t rush proper cheese ripening. BUT DONT ACTUALLY SQUISH THE LOGS, PLEASE, FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS GOOD.)

I keep thinking about how Alex Wrekk talks about her garden, and picking out herbs and plants to build spells with. It’s not so much about “correspondences” as it is about “who wants to help with this spell”. When you put your time and energy and focus into tending a garden, you fall away from “this is for healing, this is for prosperity” and you end up experiencing more... “this fucker won’t stay off the front step, this other one wants to wilt if I miss watering time by an hour, and this other one could probably get magma poured directly on it and still come back up next year”.

It’s less aesthetically pleasing to be in a grocery store under fluorescent lights, working with cheese, but I still have that hands-on connection with my work. My coworkers will see me pick up a wheel that (to them) looks like an ordinary wheel of cheese, but I’ll frown, squint at it, and ask the cheese “what are you doing?” and I don’t think I could write that in a list.

[oh-for-fic-sake]

Dress Codes,Nooky And  Cock Blocks

Masterlist

Henry tries to be a white knight and realizes Kal is to smart for his own good.

Request/Prompt: Henry and Kal meets you from work after having a bad day. Playing with Kal to make Henry jealous. Shutting kal out for some nooky but Kal sits outside the door barking and howling.

Warnings: Smutty Almost Smut! Fluff, Swearing

A/N: so this has combined two ideas one of which is from the lovely @being-worthy This was going to be a Pooh bear chapter two but hasn't quite fit the bill. Anyway I hope you all enjoy.  P.S I 100% belive Kal would be a little shit!!!

Taglist: @two-unbeatable-beaters​ @thatgirly81​ @angelofthorr @iloveyouyen​ @sofiebstar​ @thefangirlsblog​ @harrysthiccthighss​ @loserrlauraa​ @tumblrnewby​ @isitmine​ @tinabean37​

This was a fucking piss take your manager was an asshole! You huffed about the office still trying to process the stupidity he just fucking spouted at you. You moved to the ladies room phone in hand ready to vent locking yourself in a stall fingers poised to rant in a long ass text message but you froze. Henry was home well at the gym to be more specific. He was over the moon having just snagged the role of Geralt of Rivia and had been working tirelessly on bulking up for the role especially now that he was getting the dates for shooting. You paused taking a deep breath. No. You cant vent to him and ruined his day to. You growled and moved leaving the bathroom slamming the door thankful that you only had another hour, at least the prick had the decency to wait until the end of the day.

You through your phone down into the bag sitting at your desk for a few moments. You cast your eyes over the computer screen seeing the little bimbo...His little bimbo Stacey there was an office romance between your asshat of a manager and this little blonde. She ran about the office in small tight skirts hair immaculate and thick makeup smeared across her face and fuck me glasses that were an accessory not prescription like yours. She had a snug fitted blouse and pencil skirt on flitting about the office in some dangerous looking heels. More feminine? Was you supposed to jump up and say 'yes sir of course Sir, anything to keep this job sir' then flutter your lashes at him?.

Fuck that, and fuck this be more feminine bullshit, there was no written dress code and as far as things had gone you were doing your job pretty damn well and you didn't need heels to do it!

You scowled seeing the blonde slip out followed by your manager it mus be time fore their discrete get away a make out in the copier room...How original. You sighed clicking your mouse scanning through the next lot of appointments...No more today but there was a shit tonne tomorrow. You sighed getting down...Was your job really on the line over skirts,  makeup and heels? Sure you were on probation but they couldn't sack you for breaking a non existent dress code...Could they.honestly you wouldn't put it past Dave he seemed to have some fucked up traditional views.

Your attention was quickly drawn down to your phone buzzing you smiled seeing it was Henry quickly tapping the notification.

'Bbe you still at the office?? Miss you! 😘😘' You smiled softly heaving a deep breath then began typing.

'Yep still here not for long though finish in 1hr thank god 😘😘 u 2 at the gym still??' You sent the text and got a reply pretty quick you smiled he must have left the gym to reply so quick. Your thoughts wandered a daydream of the huge glorious man puffed out and sweaty ugh yes that's what you needed right now your man to just ruin you fuck the stress and doubt right out of you!. Your eyes scanned the new text he had sent pulljng you out of your raunchy thoughts.

'No just left walking Kal around the park he got a bit excited need to wear him out, so have a good day?'

'😂 good luck with that. And its been okay...G2g shopping after apparently I need to dress more feminine😒😒 so will be home late' You frowned hearing the two love birds enter the office again wrapped up around one another professionally you rolled your eyes as the blonde pulled away from your manager giggling and made her way to the computer opposite you instantly reaching for her compact mirror trying to correct the smeared lipstick across her face. Your phone pinged and you looked down face lighting up a little seeing the anger emojis. Henry felt the same ass you.

'😡😡🤬WTF? wats tht sppsd 2 mean?' you cringed maybe you should have just kept your mouth shut but it was too late now you sighed trying to placate him.

'I need to wear skirts and shit...be an office bimbo no big deal🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️ just get a few skirts thts all' you typed back his reply was immediate almost as if he'd been typing the same time as you. Wincing you prepared yourself for the worse, Henry was a very protective man and you knew he hated the whole gender roles thing.

'😡😡You dnt need makeup and shit!! ur gorgeous dnt u listen to that wanker!! Can't u leave early?? Say ur going shopping?? Just get out of there! please love dnt let this get 2 u!!🥺🥺 I love u, ur perfect!!😍😘😘😍' You grinned got flushing rereading the words a warmth in your chest. You knew that he meant every word. Stacey looked over with a smirk snapping the compact shut and pointed a false nail in your direction.

"Oh? Is that a blush? Who are you texting? Someone cute?" You flicked your eyes up to her you didn't have anything against her per say but you were different people, she was all Instagram, kardashians and trending and you were all gaming, books and cosy pajamas. You never really spoke to her if you could help it.

"Err yeah...My boyfriend" you admitted looking down seeing another text from him. Another round of compliments and reassuring words lit up your screen.

'I mean it bbe I know u! dnt beat urself up over it! Dont u let him get 2 u!😘😘' you smiled softly yes he did know you and he knew this had not only made you angry but also insecure. You thought you looked good at work you always made a point to look 'put together' but it wasn't enough?

"Ooo was that him again? You never told me you had a boyfriend! Is he new? How long have you been together? What does he do? Whats he saying!?" You gulped as she got up quickly scuttling around the desk as fast as she could in her heels and skirt.

"We've been together a few years...He's just asking me to leave early and catch diner with him but I don't think Dave would like that..." Stacey's face lit up and she beamed at you. She was happy to have something else to gossip about.

"Oh! that’s so sweet~ he wants to steal you away for dinner! You know I wish Dave would do that but he only really pays attention to me at work....So does this sweet mystery man have a name?" You looked up at her tilting your phone away a little so she didn't see Henry's on going threats of 'coming down there and teaching Dave some manners by ripping his tongue out his ass' you shook your head as you caught the ass end of a long text full of emojis...You sort of regret teaching him the meanings of them....Was that an eggplant in the middle?.

"Henry...His name is Henry and he's an actor" Stacey squealed cupping her face completely excited for some reason.

"Oh that's so cute! You know its always you shy ones that nab yourselves the boho guys...You know I always wanted to date the 'boho' type myself but never did, they were all to....Just not my type I like clean cut guys, you know ones who fill out a suit" You squinted what the fuck was she getting at? You schooled your features standing taller quickly and made your own little dig.

"Like Dave?" she flushed and nodded excitedly missing the whole sarcastic droll over your words. She clapped her hands completely missing the fact you were poking fun at the scrawny 'stud' sleazeball who Henry could easily snap over his thigh if he wanted to.

"Yes just like my Dave~! Ugh anyway do you have a pic...Come ooon! Let me see your man~" you sighed tilting your head to her...She was pretty harmless...And dippy so it shouldn't do any harm she didn't strike you as the type of person to watch Henry's movies so shouldn't recognize him. You nodded sweetly it was actually a little fun you rarely got to show off your man,  most people who knew him knew you were dating. You twisted the phone eying the screen and froze seeing the last texts he sent you whilst you spoke to Stacey.

'Have you got out early??🧐🧐'

'Babe don't ignore me!😤😤 Is he still there!?😡'

'Woman you better answer me! Stop ignoring me bbe it wont help😤😤'

'Im serious y/n do I need to chat with him? Do you want me to help?🧐🧐'

'Look out the window'

"Oh hell no!" you huffed out under your breath then stood up scrabbling to the large office window Stacey followed you alarmed. You freaked and quickly opened the window poking your head out to scream at your sweet but very dappy boyfriend. As irritated as the texts were he didn't look it, well until you really looked he was tense and it wasn't just because Kal was puling excitedly.

"Oh my god?! HENRY?! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!....GET OUT OF THE GOD DAMNED ROAD!!" lone behold when you looked down you saw Henry standing there with a huge bouquet of Roses and a bag you suspected held a box of chocolates, Kal was barking up at you spinning in circles and jumping up super excited almost dragging the huge man over in all the excitement. It would seem the walk was not enough to wear out the bear. Henry grinned up at you you heard Stacey from beside you gasp.

"Holy shit is that your boyfriend??" you turned to her and smiled smugly to her nodding then glanced back down to him seeing him quickly navigate the people bustling around the car park heading for the doors. You froze. You can't let him up here he sounded angry earlier...He'd kill Dave. You ran back to your desk quickly logging off the pc and snatching up your bag.

"Where do you think your going y/n?" Dave called after you you stopped seeing him there arms crossed giving you the filthiest look he could muster seeing your bag slung over your arm then there was the distinct buzzing of someone Henry at the door trying to be buzzed in. You pointed to the door opening our mouth to fake sickness or something but was interrupted.

"Oh Dave leave her alone...All the times she's here early let her go early for once, we don't need her anymore today and it means we get the office to ourselves for an hour~" your eyes bugged out as Stacey came to your aid fluttering her lashes to your manager. He heaved a sigh and nodded to the door in a 'get out of here' motion.

You smiled quickly darting out down the stairs to the ground floor seeing Henry standing there unimpressed finger holding the button down in one long irritating ring. You shook your head at him through the glass as he held the button.

You slapped the exit button opening the door and Henry tried darting past you into the building chest puffed shoulders ready to give your boss a piece of his mind but you caught the frightening man by his ridiculous bulging bicep. You spun with him digging your heels into the worn carpet.

"No no no! Henry no!" he carried on to the stairs dragging you with him passing you the roses and Kal's lead as the dog bounced around you both yipping like the over excited pup he was. Henry had hoped filling your hands would give him time to jump up a few steps out of your reach so he could have a chat with Dave about this whole misogynistic bullshit. Henry swore when you scampered behind him hooking your arms around his forearm and leant back, if he moved you'd drop like a rock and up the few steps as you both were, you'd hurt yourself. He stopped heaving a deep sigh looking to you.

"Just five minuet's babe is all I need! fucking feminine my ass he just wants to oogle your peach of an ass!! And that's not- that ass is mine!! fucking no one NO ONE fucking upsets my baby!" Your body flushed skin prickling at the shear alpha tone the possessive growl that seeped into his words made you tremble swallowing dryly you managed to shake it off and focused on the task at hand fucking could come later for now you needed to stop him from ripping your manager a new one. You moved crouching down bearing your weight down giggling at him as he still tried to thunder up the stairs. Kal helped to pulling at his lead it was a joint effort.

"Henn love?! I'll be sacked if you go up there and make Dave piss himself! Please lets just go home it's Friday I can find a few things over the week end for now can we please leave" he stopped and looked up to the brown ceiling and flickering light sigh he clicked his tongue then looked to you slowly with a heavy breath.

"....Fine, but next time I'm having him!" you smiled finding his protective side arousing your tummy clenching just knowing you big strong man could rinse the little twat upstairs made your pussy clench you always had a thing about strong men and Henry was the most physically fit you'd ever met. You somehow managed to coax him out of the door in the direction of home taking a detour picking up a Chinese on the way.

You giggled rolling around the floor with Kal. after a quiet dinner and snuggle with Henry you had been ushered away so he could do his nightly reading of his new script.You didn't mind at all you loved seeing him so invested in his roles. you caught a glimpse of the red roses sitting proudly in a glass vase on the fireplace almost blocking the view of the tv but not quite. You loved this, just being home with your favorite boys enjoy a nice quiet night in. you scoffed mocking kal who was pulling hard on the black rope trying to out witt you with quick flicks of his head, playing tug with Kal was a workout huge as he was he had the weight and strength to out match even Henry. You did not stand a chance just holding onto the black rope hoping to slow him down but he was full of energy today.

Henry was sitting on the sofa feet up reading his witcher script pen in hand as he read his page, one a night was the deal. But honestly trying to pull him away from this particular script was a hell of a job fair enough he was trying to memorize lines and scribble down alternatives in the margins. It was sweet how excited he got, he already knew the character in and out so could already tweak things around so it felt like Geralt. He was happy had been chasing the role for a while so you didn't mind that preparing for it was taking up most of his time. but you were still horny from earlier and wouldn't complain to a night of nooky. But alas Henry was drawn in by the script and you were trying to find other ways to distract yourself from the bubbling arousal in your loins, like playing with Kal. But that’s not to say you wasn't going to tease your man, there were ways to get his attention~

You smirked putting a plan into action bending lower wriggling your ass, craning back so your shorts rode up just that little bit more. Then once in place you squealed loud gaining the mans attention as Kal tugged dragging you across the floor growling playfully bouncing his weight back jerking you around, it was only then that Henry grunted in annoyance, your voice had been high he loved you keeping Kal entertained he really did, but sometimes he needed a little quiet. Especially when he was trying to concentrate.

"You know if I keep this up I'll have bigger muscles then you~" you giggled out a you tried to hold your own against the mighty bear. Henry smiled and watched shaking his head as Kal dragged you under his legs to the free space on the side of the coffee table. As much as he was trying to concentrate you could never get on his nerves for long, he just loved you to damn much. Henry frowned as you were pulled again wincing anticipating an accident as Kal was definitely getting to invested in the game.

"Or a dislocated shoulder" he commented as Kal did another particularly painful looking shunt and shook his head side to side still growling loud around the toy. It was then that he looked at you properly and what he saw made the man pause and suck in a breath air getting trapped in his throat at the innocently erotic sight. Seeing you bent over any time was a pleasure but here and now? Bouncing deliciously on your knees being half dragged about the living room added another dimension to the whole thing. Your arms and back stretched out low on the floor spine arched slightly, sitting with your knees tucked under you, the bouncing making your ass jump deliciously.

Two full ass cheeks peeking out of you short shorts as Kal carried on his jerky movements. You bit your lip grunting and tugged back pulling with all your might successfully gaining a few inches which Kal stole back and more making you yelp and moan as you were sprawled out on the carpet again. This time dragged up on your knees into a position he he spent many nights enjoying to his fullest. were you doing this on purpose? he wouldn't put it past you...Maybe you needed a fuck, a proper fuck.

Henry couldn't help the twitching in his groin, the first tremors as he got a front row seat to the two perfect globes of your ass seemingly clapping against one another with the shorts acting like a thong shucked up your ass. Fuck you wasn't wearing Knickers again. Little fucking minx. He lowered his feet to the floor now far to invested in watching you roll around in the tiny shorts. swept up in the way your body swayed taunting him. you turned to him with a sly smile and sent him a quick wink that he almost missed.

He gaped at you, you were doing it on purpose!! His script laid completely forgotten on his lap as he watched you turn back to Kal innocently dipping down low again shoulders to the floor stretched out taught in front of you face tucked into your arm as Kal fought you for the coveted rope. God...It had been a while since he fucked you like that. He licked his lips. Too long in the busy days since snagging the witcher role he had only had time for a two quickies. Two fumbled quickies in three weeks and they wasn't even that good. Well not his usual hour long foreplay teasing and touching then good few rounds. They were just a flurry of fast rutting motion's, less fucking more jerking trying to finish as quickly as you could just wanting that high. he bit his lip watching you watch him out of the corner of your eye definitely teasing him.

"Babe come here~" You froze and twisted your head back you knew that tone.Grinning knowing you'd got your way you looked seeing Henry eyeing you hungrily biting his lip tilting his head, legs spread wide making his thighs bulge in what should be a loose set of black shorts but actually became skin tight on this Goliath of a man. You flushed under the gaze but managed to hold into the rope not giving the still pulling pup an inch. His eyes were a dark ocean blue pupils nearly swallowing the color completely, you wondered how far you could push him. you pouted at him before teasing him further opening your legs wider letting the material of your shorts almost completely disappear.

"Henry...I'm playing with Kal-" he squinted at you then quirked a brow before shaking his head snapping shut the folder holding the script and let it drop to the floor by his foot with a decisive thump. You gulped. But didn't move instead you heaved back pulling the Akita across the floor.

"Babe...Come here Kal's had his playtime..." you rolled your eyes hearing the silent 'now I want mine' sometimes he was a man child. You twisted your head to him with a flutter of your lashes and cheeky grin.

"Well I'm playing with Kal you have to wait your turn-HEY? HENRY THAT’S CHEATING!?" You yelped as Henry quickly bolted up right and stomped on the rope whilst using his considerable size and strength to pull you up off the floor making you release the toy.

"Well that’s enough playing with Kal, time to play with me. I wont be cock blocked in my own house by the dog~" you giggled as Henry quickly began climbing the stairs laughing kicking your feet, watching as Kal stayed two steps behind rope in his mouth excitedly following his parents, you were all going to play!. It was only when the dog found himself shut out of the bedroom did he realize you were in fact not going to be playing with him anymore tonight. you could hear the indignant huff through the door.

You wriggled as Henry fell onto the bed with you wrapped around him slowly devouring each other with deep kisses tongues and teeth roaming each other. It had been a good few weeks since you both explored one another properly. Henry pulled away chuckling at the soft scratches at the door. Kal was not impressed.

"Kal go lie down! We will be finished soon" Henry called out and ignored the high whines and more insistent scratching at the door and leaned over you sucking at your neck decorating it as he saw fit leaving marks of red and purple biting his mark into the crook of your neck then lower tracing a warm wet train over your thin shirt. You moaned clutching his waist trapping him between your thighs using the grip you had to rock up onto him trying to ease the burning in your core.

"Oh whats this? Someone is impatient considering she wanted to keep playing with Kal?" His voice came out as a deep rasp making you gasp cupping his face.

"You treating me with your Geralt babe?" He smiled latching onto your ear rocking down onto you drawing out soft mewls. You vaguely heard Kals whines become louder barks out side the door hearing the dog jump up pawing at the handle of the door trying to break in.

"Oh you like?~" You sighed quickly trying to rid your tshirt panting feeling just how wet your slit had got, you were embarrassingly wet considering you hadn't even done anything yet.

"Fuck yes~ oh god its so-ah fuck its so hot Henry~" he pulled back growling in the new low tone you hadn't known he was capable of, his large hands helped remove the tshirt throwing it across the room and latched onto your tits biting and sucking slow flicking his tongue across a pebbled nipple as his hands stripped you of your shorts. he chuckled seeing the damp patch, your arousal sticking to the material in one neat line.

"Oh you really do need me don't you love~" you nodded to him whining when he pulled back grunting a growl biting your boob and sucking harshly. You both moved in tandem rolling around the sheets grinding ,rocking ,biting and grunting both intent on ignoring the pup crying outside the door. He would wear himself out and get bored. Well that was the plan anyway.

Henry finally pinned you and descended on your core like a starving man given the sweetest fruit. You cried out fingers in his hair unsure what spurred on this heated frenzie but would happily indulge him. One thing you loved about him is he was always up for eating you out, the man thrived on it! He seemed to get a massive kick out of feasting on you until you came all over him. You grunted as he suckled on your bud teasing and twisting his supple lips across it Nipping you began to loose yourself panting and jerking up into his mouth chasing a sweet release you hadn't known you needed and then you heard it.

A deep loud echoing mournful howl. Even Henry stopped frowning up at you from between your legs. That was new, Kal wasn't a howly dog, he barked and yipped giving off the weirdest groans and moans. But never howled. You both burst out laughing unable to stop it as the howls were all over the place, loud and quiet raspy and uneven like Kal was an apprentice learning on the job.they were less 'howls' and more 'how-wo-wow-wo-wow' It was clear this was his first time but bless him he was trying to be the wolf of the house. You panicked as he began to get the hang of it and patted Henry's shoulder. he was still chuckling finding Kals new found voice hilarious.

"Quick stop him! If he learns that we'll never hear the end of it!" You chuckled pulling the thin sheet over you as Henry swore and quickly slinked off the bed racing to the door opening it stopping Kal in his tracks. The Akita smiled panted a few breaths thumped his tail on the floor then collected his rope entering, jumping on the bed without a care in the world.

"Babe?" You asked biting the inside of your cheek trying to stop the giggles as Henry began to scowl at the fluffy bear sprawling out on his side of the bed a flush building up his chest settling over his face. He cleared his throat.

You and Henry watched as Kal moved dropping the rope by your hand waiting for you to continue your game of tug. You flopped back in peels of laughter at Henry's face. The man looked amused and livid at the same time as realization struck. Kal, lovable cute baby boi Kal had just played Henry like a fiddle. You didn't know whether to laugh or cry at the fact your boyfriend, your chosen mate had just been outsmarted by a dog.

"Yes love?" He said none to happy with how things had turned out, here he was standing at the foot of his bed painful hard on and there you were naked and willing...In his bed...With Kal. This was not the plan.

"I hate to break it to you...But you've just been cock blocked in your own house by your dog....For a game of tug!" You giggled as you threw Henry's previous words back at him petting Kal who was still fiddling with the rope trying to make you grab it.

"No shit...Can we still fuck? I mean he can have my side! I'm gonna be on top of you anyway?" You gaped at him as he rounded the bed fulling intent on rolling on top of you sliding home. You held up your hand to him.

"Nope! No way am I fucking you next to Kal!" Henry ignored you crouching over you trying to lay you back down to finish what he started before being rudely interrupted by the Akita now in bed with his girlfriend.

"Oh babe why not? this is painful, look I'm going purple...Besides you started it its your responsibility~" he whined trying to bat away your pushing hands leaning in to capture you with a burning kiss. You dodged anticipating his next move, his kisses were always a sure fire way to make you completely melt and give in to him. you quickly twisted away throwing your legs over the side of the bed placing your hands either side of his naked hips, pressing him back as he still tried to gain on you. you swallowed looking up at him meeting his lopsided grin, trying to ignore the proud cock swaying in front of you almost tapping your heaving breasts.

"How about the shower? He's scared of the bathroom since his last bath?" Henry snapped his fingers and clapped face lighting up as he patted your hands slowly easing them off of him.

"Fuck yes! Babe you are a genius!" He moved over and kissed your face making you bat him away and then he turned to Kal wagging a finger at him.

"And you my four legged son are a pain in the ass!" You shook your head patting Kal as he tilted his head  he looked offended with his dads statement. You looked to the bathroom door as Henry's pert ass vanished around the door frame.

"Daddy didn't mean it baby boy~ you know how he is when he doesn't get his way...Just a spoiled man child~ he loves you really" Kal whined ears flattening  as he heard the shower switch on. You patted the dog with a sigh and got up padding across the bedroom to the en suit.

"Don't worry baby you stay there and daddy wont get you in the mean old shower~" you giggled scratching his ears as he huffed  in defeat. His daddy had got the better of him and the Akita wasn't pleased. He grumbled as Henry poked his head around the door frame wriggling his brows at you as you passed him getting a playful smack on the rear. then he faced the dog and stuck his tongue out childishly to the dog who huffed and turned around choosing to give you both a clear view of his ass.

[ignatiusteto]

actually i like the name fonte???  simple and it means a lotta things that could totally be symbolic. anyway thought of some lines and utilities this is specifically for my val radiant oc anyway some lore and quotes and abilities under the cut im not gonna bother my mostly star trek followers with this (unless.................)

Loading on Icebox:      “I definitely wouldn’t come here for a vacation... It’s got sun, but it’s missing everything else.”

Loading on Ascent:      [clearly dejected] “Not quite as I remember it, but...”      “I barely even recognize you. Anima mia, what did they do to you?”

ok anyway some uhhh abilities whatever i just now thought of some and they seem to fit initiator the most (haha i say as i main initiators (Not You, KAY/O))

ROLE: Initiator

submerge/douse - target a specific radius and submerge enemies in water, leaving them struggling with visuals and sounds and slowing them for a very brief period of time.

surf - send forward a wave of water that blinds enemies and knocks them back a bit.

drown/submerge - despite the possible name, apply an armor of water to yourself or a teammate. take less damage from bullets as the water slows them. adds more bulk to your character model and makes sound (aka, it’s not very stealthy if you are in enemy territory).

NOW FOR SOME LORE.

probably ex-military (navy lol wowww), hails from venice, italy (well. yknow what happened there). after the whole first light thing she kind of just went into hiding and laid low for a while bc she wasnt sure of her new found abilities and didnt want to be like assassinated while living her life or be taken into custody by the government, and then ig the protocol found her and she was visiting and she was just really put off by it because that was her Home and almost chickened out (understandably, chickened out isnt the right phrasing but look) until she kinda got hit in the face with the reality of everything and was told “either you join us, or you wait until the inevitable day someone finds out you’re a radiant and your life is taken from you, not that it already hasn’t been with the way you’ve been living.” and she reluctantly joined as fonte i dont know how important or canon codenames are bc they seem more like file data stuff but uhhhhh thinkin venezia or swimmer or something idk. maybe buoy idk!! anyway.

k that’s all i have one of those would prolly be suited to be an ult but idk <3

[procrastinationonvacation]

I loved your Angband answer! I would love to keep hearing your thoughts (they’re really interesting!), so could I possibly ask about your opinions on The Wives (Nerdanel, Anairë and Eärwen)?

- Captain Anon (I like the name :))

Hello Captain anon!! I’m glad you like it :)

ok I think it was @feanorianethicsdepartment who came up with this: but they all suffer from being Chaotic as hell. To sum up what the post was, these three Voluntarily chose to be in this family, where no one has had a “chill” day in their life. (as usual im putting the bulk of this under a cut cause it got long)

The one exception in this family *might* be Arafinwe bc 1.did not join this life voluntarily and 2.seems pretty chill. So fine maybe Earwen isn’t That chaotic. They do have the most operative children after all.

-

anyways:

Nerdanel: “the wise.” pfft yeah right. The only person crazier than her is feanor and I say that endearingly. Arguably worse when it comes to crafting. Listen, Feanor is in part the way he is about his creations because he’s angry at everyone and generally has unresolved issues with his parents. The guy is like “my motivation is to be better than everyone. Because I hate everyone.” That’s our boy. Nerdanel has none of that, she wants to be better than everyone because she is. It’s pure hubris, unchecked ambition and “what even is that, how can I make it Cooler (more sparkly).” Mahtan and Finwe should run.

Obviously this gets a little toned down when her husband goes crazy over his three shiny-s. Obviously she realizes that considerations should be made before just rampantly making a thing when she sees what swords have done to her friends. I’m imagining it kind of like Walton in Frankenstien listening to Frankensteins story and thinking “ok it’s time to go back to my community because all consuming ambition has some pretty shit consequences”

Remember in some appendix some place they’re like “oh we mean wise but like,, only in being technically smart,,, these people were legit idiots” when talking about the Noldor? Yeah.

-

Anaire: Look at their kids and her husband and just TRY and tell me she was a normal person. Like yeah they all pass for normal, especially considering their relations, but the moment things start going south they go straight to eagle flying and morgoth challenging. Anyways I never rally say Fingolfin as an aggressive influence so I guess what I���m trying to say is it had to come from somewhere and Anaire will wreck your shit. Like at elven thanksgiving dinner, when the whole family gets together, if there’s a fight theres a 90% chance it’s Feanor and Anaire going at it, 10 seconds away from the first kinslaying at all times.

Also this is a complete reach, but her name means holy or something like that, so I imagine she’s pretty tight with the valor. And she and Earwen are friends, so all I’m saying is that they are the Worlds Best Gossips and have shit on Manwe himself.

Please understand I say this all affectionately.

-

Earwen: the one for who’s sanity a case could actually be made. She and Arafinwe are generally pretty removed from the drama, but that doesn’t mean they dont get visits. just imagine Anaire showing up to their house like “Arafinwe, you’ll never guess what your dumb brother is up to now. “ and then it’s time to play “is she mad at Feanor or Fingolfin” (plot twist it’s Findis’ husband)

Also I’m assuming she’s pretty forgiving because Arafinwe came back from the revolt of the noldor, and no one said anything about them having a divorce or something sooooooo… 100% uses it to get him to do stuff in later ages tho: “hey can we watch star wars” “no we watched it last week” “wow you’re really killing my dreams. Just stabbing them through-“ “star wars! such a great movie!! we should do a marathon!”

-

Thanks for the ask!!! I really enjoyed it!!

[lassieposting]

Hey, I saw you did a hc thing for Scaracen/Dexter and I was wondering if you could do one for Ghastly/Skulduggery?? (I love the pairing but there is no content and it makes me sad) Hope you are having a good time :)

I genuinely thought I had done this for ghasdug but apparently not? I can't find it anyway

There is content in my ghasdug tag but tbh in my experience the ghasdug shippers are on discord mostly...hit me up

ANYWAY

So. Ghasdug. Ghastly wants skug from the start.

They're 16 when they meet. Ghastly gets a bit seasick and doesn't really want to go anywhere by ship, but his mama tells him he needs to, there's something important for him on that ship, that one right there, and he trusts her enough to know that she's clearly foreseen something and to just go with it.

By the time they get back to shore, he's already thinking, it's you. I was supposed to meet you.

They head back to Dublin together. Ghastly's mama takes one look at this awkward, skinny, skittish child and decides she's adopting him, and skug moves into their farmhouse and is subsequently freaked the fuck out by his very first experience of A Loving Family. Ghastly's mother like, hugs him and reminds him to wear a coat and clips his ear for swearing and makes sure he eats breakfast. He is semiferal and not used to any of this.

For a few months they settle into a comfortable routine:

- Ghastly's father spends the week making clothes, then does commission deliveries one day and takes hats and boots and suchlike to the market the next.

- Ghastly's mother has a job as a barmaid, where she gets to regularly crack some skulls and socialise, which is great for her because she is both a short-n-stocky powerhouse and a giant extrovert.

- The boys spend most of their time together, and they're supposed to do the bulk of the chores. It's not a large commercial farm - they have a vegetable garden, and some chickens, and an old carthorse, and maybe a couple of goats or a cow for milk and cheese. Ghastly and Skug are supposed to cut firewood and feed the animals and fetch groceries from the market and milk the milkable animal and fix this and repair that. All the things the parents dont have time for

Which. Is great in theory but skug has never had to do a hard day's work in his lazy aristocratic life, and develops a severe and immediate allergy to manual labour, so actually ghastly tends to do most of the chores while skug skives off and naps in the sun or chats up the girls who live on the neighbouring smallholding over the fence

And like, therein lies the problem, because they are both solidly in the grip of that cruel mistress called puberty and like. Skug was a fuckin weird-looking child. He had big ears and a sharp nose and a bunch of missing teeth and his limbs were all too long for him. But he's now rapidly growing into all the features that made him an unfortunate child, and it's already clear that he's going to be one of those people who will, inevitably, grow into handsome young men.

Which is like. Fine. Ghastly doesn't care. He's not jealous or anything. He doesn't feel a twinge when the neighbour girls only speak to him to ask about Skulduggery. Nobody here is bitter.

It's a good thing, he tells himself. Nobody will want to marry him anyway, so he's glad skug is around now so Mother can harass him to meet a nice girl and give her grandchildren. At least someone will probably want to have children with skug.

He has a dream about skug not long before his 17th. They share the attic room, and when he startles awake, skug is smirking at him from the opposite bed and asking "who is she?" and ghastly thinks oh no. He's painfully embarrassed and awkward about it, and skug rolls over and stretches and says, "relax, bespoke, your secret is safe with me" and all ghastly can focus on is that he's actually been putting some muscle on lately and when he stretches like that it does funny things to ghastly's insides.

- they start riding into town in the evenings to meet up with hopeless at the tavern, play cards and flirt with pretty girls. Or rather, skug flirts with pretty girls. He's all legs and freckles and elegant clothes, and they hang off his every word. Ghastly knows they will never look at him like that. He's Skulduggery's ugly friend. Girls only approach him to ask about skug

- and he gets it! Skug is unfairly attractive! And he's witty, and clever, and sometimes when ghastly wakes up first he stays very quiet so he can watch skug sleep, the way the dawn turns his hair to burnished copper, the way his curls fall across his forehead and the patterns his freckles make on his skin. Skug is an affectionate, tactile drunk, and hopeless looks at ghastly with something like pity whenever skug rests his chin on ghastly's shoulder or leans his head on ghastly's knee or wants a piggyback back to where they tied the horse, and ghastly takes what little he can get and says nothing.

- they're coming home drunk in the pouring rain one night, later than usual, riding doubled up on ghastly's carthorse. ghastly is behind, loosely holding on around skug's waist, and the whole way home all he can think about is how close they are and how much he wants to lean in and put his mouth on skug's neck, and by halfway home he's reduced to silently begging his semi not to pop a full on hard-on until they're home, when skug will crash like always and ghastly can take care of himself in private

- when they get home, they're locked out, which is what they get for coming home well after ghastly's parents are asleep, but this isn't a one off and ghastly's mother always leaves blankets for them to sleep in the barn. so they put the horse away and give her a rub-down/groom together and skug's shirt is practically see-through and his hair is plastered to his skull and ghastly can't take his eyes off the visible jut of collarbone where the neck of skug's shirt is undone and skug makes a couple jokes about it when their eyes meet, how ghastly has been brushing the same bit of horse for as long as it's taken skug to do half his side, but then the third time he laughs and teases, "if i didn't know better, bespoke, I'd say you wanted me" and ghastly will forever blame the alcohol but he doesn't even think about it? It comes out before he can stop himself, before he has time to remember what it could do to their friendship

- he says, "what if i did?"

- skug goes quiet for a minute, and it's a tense sort of quiet, not the thick, cloying tension that comes before a storm or an argument but the light, vibrating tension that comes with standing on a cliff's edge or drawing a bowstring, and then he ducks under the horse's head to come around to ghastly's side. He's still a little shorter than ghastly, still has to look up ever so slightly to meet his eyes.

- skug says, "do you?" like it's still half a joke, and there's a chance to back out right there, to laugh and deny it and let this become an amusing footnote at the bottom of their friendship, but ghastly ignores it. "yes."

- skug shrugs, his lip quirking, and says, "so have me."

- ghastly learns a lot that night. he also accidentally blurts "i love you" when he comes, but nobody's perfect and he's...relatively...sure skug was too distracted to have been paying attention, so he'll count that as a massive win

- morning finds them in the hayloft, tangled up in the blankets left out for them, regretting their choice of tavern beverages and, in ghastly's case, sporting a classic case of morning wood. He's kind of hoping he'll get lucky again with sleepy morning sex but skug is disgustingly hungover and just wants to burrow his head into ghastly's chest to block out the light and go back to sleep so like, out of luck.

- when skug has slept off the booze a bit more, Ghastly awkwardly broaches the question of "just how drunk were you" and they establish that they both remember fucking, neither of them regrets it, and the attraction is apparently mutual? Which is a mindfuck for self-conscious teenage ghastly, because, like, why tho

- they both get to do the walk of shame into the house when ghastly's parents wake up. Ghastly's shirt hides the nail marks skug left on his back nicely; sadly, the same cannot be said for the giant hickey he left on skug's throat, and he is eternally grateful to his parents for not bringing it up (he'll allow his mother her raised eyebrows. She did it quietly)

- they just sort of? happen, after that. There's no conversation about what they are to one another, so there are several crossed wires and feelings get hurt, but they always move past it. They both have phases of going off with someone else - but they keep ending up back together regardless of how much they argue.

[thot-writes]

some goofball’s attempt at a step-by-step tutorial

ok so i was requested to do a tutorial starting from a blank page. please keep in mind that i draw purely for fun & there are likely a lot of inaccuracies in my anatomy, lighting, etc.

anyway, onto the step-by-step! i use photoshop CS6. i mainly use round brushes (with adjusted hardness depending on what im using it for) and occasionally special brushes like a glitter or dirt brush or whatnot.

VERY long post so it’ll be here under the cut.

step 1 (pose sketch): 

i start on a big 4100x3500 px canvas and find a pose that i like (this one was from amanda khamkaew’s insta, since i use her as chickie’s face claim) and i redraw it. i edit things that i dont like about the pose, so for example this pose was a selfie so her other hand was taking the picture - i decided to just have the hand resting on the knee instead. 

it also doesn’t matter if your sketch looks like dogshit at this point, MOST of the corrections happen later.

i normally draw in a dark grey, but i really can’t see that as being an important step. 

step 2 (detailing the sketch):

here i put more effort into the sketch. i add the clothes, hair, face, and fix up things to make them more realistic (like her hand, which was previously just a bunch of blocks)

i use reference for all of these things. with the eyes, because im lazy, i copy and paste the one i draw first onto the other side and fix it up. same with the shoes. i drew one, then copy and pasted it to the other foot.

i clean up the linework a bit, change the colour to black, and add a little dark triangle underneath the chin (i dont know why i do this, i just like how it looks) and added lines in the back just for a general idea of the angle of the picture and ta-da! sketch done.

step 3 (base colouring):

on a new layer i colour the entire sketch using a hard brush with one colour that’s easy to see against the background, most times the skintone of the character i’m drawing. if their skintone is too white, i’ll just colour in a random, darker colour and once i’m sure there’s no gaps or spaces that aren’t properly filled in, i lock the layer and change it to their skintone. 

step 4 (skin details):

here i lock the layer and use a soft brush (0-30% hardness) to add the shading of the body. even if something isn’t going to be exposed much, like the skin in the ripped jeans, i still shade it anyway just to remind myself of where the shading is going to go. use a big brush at first, then decrease the size for details.

don’t mind mistakes here, especially not if they’re in areas you’re going to cover up later. i don’t do TOO much shading on the face at this point because i like to leave that for when i’m focusing on the face later on in the drawing.

step 5 (uh.... everything else):

on separate layers clipped to the skin layer below, i add the colours of the clothing as well as the hair and makeup. i do basic shading and once i’m satisfied with how it all looks, i merge it into one layer.

i also merge the colour layer with the lineart layer, so EVERYTHING at this point should be on one single layer. if you notice a mistake, just undo it, fix it, then merge it all again. if you decide later on that you don’t like the colour of something, create a new layer, clip it, colour over the area in question (using a layer effect like overlay or multiply), adjust the colours to what you want, then merge it again.

step 6 (the bulk of the work):

once the layers are merged i use the liquify tool to adjust anything i don’t like about the silhouette. for example, i wanted to extend and thin out her torso and increase the size of her butt (a common step for me tbh...)

i draw over everything with better details. i focus on one thing at a time like shoes, pants, shirt, gloves, etc. and use references for all of them. if you’re unsure about a change you’re making, you can always draw on a new layer and then merge it down once you’re happy with it. i aim to either erase or draw over all the lineart by the end of the piece - which is why you shouldn’t spend TOO much time on the initial sketch.

i ended up not liking how the shirt was ripped before, so i coloured over it then added different tears where i wanted them.

NOTE that this is the most LENGTHY PROCESS of the entire drawing. while i can have the base sketch and colouring down in an hour or two, the adding of details can take TRIPLE that amount of time. maybe there’s a faster way to do it all, but honestly i don’t mind, because (again) i draw purely for my own entertainment.

step 7 (yes we’re still fucking detailing, folks):

by this point you want to kill yourself because of how finicky you’re being with the details, but you keep going anyway even though you know you’re only two-thirds finished with it.

i’ve finished the details of the clothing - once again looking at references for ALL of them - and can move onto my favourite parts. namely the skin, face, and hair. 

also, i utilise the layer effects (mostly overlay for lighting and multiply for shading, although it can vary) to easily add depth to what i’m drawing. i clip the layer, change the layer mode, and colour away. it’s MUCH easier than colouring the shade in initially especially on more complicated parts like the shoes.

when i shade the face (not done here) i add more detail to it. i add the shading and lighting via multiply/overlay, and i also add a blush to the cheeks just to give the face some more colour.

step 8 (the hardest part is now DONEZO):

the skin is shaded, the face is perfected, the hair edited, and the gory details like blood and bruises and dirt are now added. fantastic!

i use SHAPE DYNAMICS on the brush when i add the strands of hair, it essentially makes the brush taper off rather than be one shape the whole time. on a separate layer, i add the gore. for the blood/cuts/bruises, i use multiply underneath the actual wound to add redness. again, USE REFERENCES for everything you do, it’ll make it look so much better trust me.

i DONT MERGE the initial drawing layer and the layer with gore and dirt on it. you can if you like, but i like to keep them separate JUST IN CASE. 

for chickie’s tattoos, i create a new layer and CLIP IT then copy and paste all of the tattoos i have in a separate file onto her skin. i erase all the parts that wouldn’t be showing, put the layer on multiply, and adjust the opacity or the colour depending on how faced i want it to look.

step 9 (the background):

unless its a simple background i can easily knock out myself, I DONT DO MY OWN BACKGROUNDS. i normally have an image in mind (for example, since this is chickie in far cry 5 i was envisioning her inside a cabin, so i looked up cabin interiors) then i find one i like, add it to the background and adjust it. i use gaussian blur on it, edit the lighting and shading with overlay/multiply once again, and mess around with the shaping tool until it at least somewhat matches the perspective it should be in. 

step 10 (filters!):

i make a group of all the layers involving chickie and duplicate it. on the second copy, i go into blending options and remove the R channel, so it’s got a bit of a chromatic aberration effect going on. i move the layer around for a subtle effect. this isn’t a necessary step it’s just something i’ve done for ages.

i also play around with layer effects like colour dodge, multiply, overlay, hard light, etc. and add in extra lighting and shading to the image. i use colour dodge for the harsher lighting on chickie’s left side where the light is coming from the window, and i also use a WHITE colour with outer glow on to add even more lighting to her. i trace over the outline of her hair and body, and draw over the little shinies in her eyes for a subtle glow on her silhouette.

i normally end up with like.... 4 or more layers of filter so i tend to group them all together in a separate group. 

also i add my tag “eshos.ian” which is my instagram account and THEN, finally, after roughly 8-12 (don’t know, didn’t time it) hours of drawing it is complete. sometimes i add further filters on it with apps like insta but this is the gist. isn’t she beautiful? waw.... i sure do love me some chickie.

i hope this has been a useful step-by-step and that you’ve learned something new! if not, sorry lol i tried.

[boltwrites]

Ummmm any tips on how to start writing fanfics? I have ideas but I am worried nobody will like my ocs or my reader inserts.

ofc anon! i’ve actually been meaning to write a post directed towards people looking to start writing for the first time or for people who want to grow a blog similar to mine, so here are some tips! also i answered an ask about my writing process here if that interests you as well!

writing ocs

i’ve found that one of the most important parts of writing an oc is figuring out what their purpose is in the story. do you want to use the oc to give a character a partner? do you want to use them to flesh out a concept in canon that wasn’t talk about much? think about why you’re writing the oc, and build around that!

figure out your point of view. for example: are you going to ONLY follow the oc? is the oc the center of the story? or is the oc just a cog in a larger story? this will help you figure out how to navigate your oc story. for example, i initially started writing bittw in third person, with a more detached narrative surrounding Taro. then, i realized that since she interacts so much with the main characters, and since we already KNOW the krew’s story, that it would be more interesting to move into first person and see the story through Taro’s eyes

its ok if your oc is similar to some canon characters (because they have to have SOME similarities) but not exactly the same. for example, i knew that Taro can be pretty similar to Korra sometimes, so i made sure to distinguish her by making her a little bit more intense, and by giving her a backstory that was wildly different than Korra’s own backstory

if you can, give your character a life outside of the main story. what does your character do in their free time? do they have a job? where do they live? what are their relatives like? 

give your oc powers relative to the universe they’ll be interacting in, or the story they’re a part of. for example, let’s say you’re writing for lok. if your story is just a romance, then it doesn’t matter if your oc is a good fighter or not, because your story is focused solely around a romantic plot. however, if your story extends beyond that and you want your oc to go on adventures with the krew, it would make more sense for your oc to be a powerful bender, a weapons specialist, or an inventor (like Varrick or Asami). however, creating a character who is basically an additional Avatar wouldn’t be advised, because then your character would be overpowered. match your character to your universe and genre - they can be powerful and special, so long as they are of a similar caliber as the main cast

writing x reader

the most important thing about writing x reader is not actually how you characterize reader, but how you characterize whatever character you are writing for

it’s always a good idea to come up with some general headcanons and post those before you jump into writing your x reader fanfics. re-watch or reread whatever it is that you’re going to be writing for (at least a couple episodes or chapters) in order to get a feel for the character, and then writing down your headcanons. figure out their personality - i find that people value a consistent character, so having a list of the character’s personality traits in romantic situations can help out a lot if you get stuck

reader, however, is a character you CAN change to suit your needs. don’t be afraid to switch up reader’s personality if the prompt calls for it. i’ve written really shy, quiet reader, and then turned around and written a very dominant, loud, and outgoing reader right after. dont be afraid to give your reader some personality, because you can just as easily write reader as the opposite for the next request

know your limits. if you won’t write nsfw, or you won’t write for a certain popular character, let your followers know beforehand. this is about you having fun, and if certain topics make you nervous or uncomfortable, don’t be afraid to say no

running a blog

if you want to run a blog similar to this one, i have some tips for that too!

USE READ MORES!!!! if you have the bulk of your story under a cut, it’s more likely to be reblogged (aka spread beyond just the tag you posted it under). put a summary or maybe the first paragraph above the cut, but put the rest of it under a read more. not only does this make it easier to scroll through your own blog, but it means that the content under the read more can be edited, even after it has been reblogged! that means if you made an embarrassing type, that it will be fixed even after it has already been reblogged!!

post in tags, and make sure your work shows up in the tags, and stays there! your work is guaranteed to show up in the first 5 tags on your post, so make it count. i’ve found that by using only five tags, your work shows up in the tags quicker, and stays there longer. adding a link within your post can cause a delay in it showing up in the tags, and in some cases will prevent it from reaching the tags altogether. being in the tags is important as a young blog, because it’s how you’ll get your work out to people who want to see it!

use the correct tags. while crossposting is ok in some instances (such as promoing an oc x character in the reader x character tag, or promoing closely associated characters in each other’s tags) flooding tags with unrelated content is seen as rude and may turn some people away. especially once you gain a decent following, try not to crosspost in unrelated tags as to not bog down content that is actually related to that character

keep a clean blog. a masterlist is a great idea, as if you have a pinned masterlist, new followers can easily go back through your catalogue of works and find something they enjoy

set up an info, rules, or faq page. even if you don’t have many rules, some people are nervous that they are going to request something you’re uncomfortable with writing. by having a rules page with a list of what you will and will not write, as well as how you will complete requests (ie: i complete headcanons quicker than fics, i usually write gender neutral reader) it can make your followers more at ease that their request won’t bother you

have fun! not all fandoms are big or active. sometimes you’re just going to be writing for yourself. before this blog, i wrote for a ship that has a grand total of maybe 50 fics in its ao3 tag. i didn’t get much interaction or support. sometimes you won’t get the support you expect, but that’s ok, so long as you’re writing for yourself and you’re enjoying what you do. 

[parkersvibes]

finding out peter is spiderman

read part one here

a/n: omg guys. i got so much feedback from you all on part one so i decided to make a part 2. and yeahh i really hope you guys enjoy. if you do lmk and i’ll do a part 3 (:

(i also apologize if the read more doesnt work )))): )

warnings: fluff, a smidge on angst

pt 2. peter parker x stark!reader

• figuring out he was spiderman

• alright you’re a stark

• but no one knows that

• but you’re really intuitive

• so there were little things you started to notice

• after uncle ben died there was some weird shit (if you want a part ab comforting peter ab uncle ben lemme know. he deserves his own part)

• like how he stopped wearing his adorable glasses

•and i guess started almost bulking up????

• he got WAY taller

• and usually you’re used to seeing him shirtless but this one time you walked in on him

• holy mother of god

• IT WAS LIKE HE GREW ABS OVER NIGHT

• BECAUSE FRESHMAN PETE DID NOT HAVE A 6 PACK

• freshman peter also got winded walking up the stairs

• AND NOW HE’S RUNNING LAPS IN GYM LIKE ITS NOTHING ??

• must be nice

• but then things got more sus

• all of a sudden he was skipping class more

• leaving early

• cancelling study sessions and skipping movie nights with ned

• and you and ned were clueless

• you and ned started hanging out more

• MR. LEEDS IS HILARIOUS LEMME TELL YOU

• he was like this little ball of happiness

• you found out his real name is Edward

• HOW CUTE

• and WOW HIS MOM BEING FILIPINA MEANT THAT YOU WERE BEING FED ALL THE TIME OH MY GOD

• ngl pete got a bit jealous

• one night,,, when pete cancelled YET AGAIN

• ned asked you, “hey y/n?”

• “hm”

• “why don’t we ever hang out at your place”

• “i told you ned, my family is just a lot yanno. plus your family and may are really cool”

• “okay but how come you don’t have any social media under your name?”

• “wdym?”

• “like you go by ‘y/n Smith’ but everything that pops up on the internet isn’t YOU”

• “pfff i told you,,, i dont believe in that stuff”

• “y/n, you know you can tell me anything”

• you wanted to be honest. this was one of your best friends. and you’ve been lying to them about your family for over a year now

• “ned i just. it’s complicated”

• “like peter’s family?”

• “nonono, i’m lucky to have both of my parents- well i have a step mom. my real mom wanted nothing to do with me. so she left me on the steps of my dads house. never came back”

• “oh shit bro, i’m sorry”

• “nah don’t worry. my dad is really cool and my step mom... she’s awesome.”

• “what’re their names”

• NATASHA WAS GONNA KILL YOU IF SHE COULD SEE HOW BAD YOU WERE STRUGGLING

• “well- uh- my step moms name is,,, um. well her real name is Virginia”

• THE WORLD KNEW PEPPER AS PEPPER NOT VIRGINIA

• “and my- my dads name is ehm... st, steve???”

• natasha was gonna have your ass

• “y/n,,,”

• “yeah”

• “you’re a horrible liar”

• “PFFF WHAAAT? NO IDEA WHAT YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT”

• “dude you left your spiderman fan tumblr open on my laptop that one night,,, and i MAY have done some snooping”

• okay you mightve had a slight obsession with the webslinger. HE WAS COOL. and what better way to keep track of him without alerting your family,,, good ol tumblr

• oh god ned, HOW MUCH SNOOPING”

• “enough to know that you have a weird obsession with that spider guy and that your last name isnt smith”

• so you told him the truth. you were a stark

• and well,,, he reacted with

• “okay cmon,,, don’t lie”

• so you showed him your late night dance parties with Nat when she was feeling goofy

• and your random snaps of steve when he was trying to figure out how to work technology

• videos of you reacting to vines with bucky

(if yall wanna see domestic life with the avengers just lmk)

• which usually results with THE WINTER SOLDIER ALMOST PEEING HIS PANTS. and trying to reenact it with sam or the other avengers

• “heyheyehy y/n guess what?”

• “what bucky?” *is in the middle of doing hw*

• “FRESHOVACADO” *bolts out of the room before you throw something at him*

• only the two of you getting vine and meme references

• (meaning getting in trouble during meetings bc you’ll make eye contact and start laughing)

• OH HIS FAVORITE IS THE “country boiiii, i love you,,, 😛”

• anywaayyy

• ned was SHOOK

• “nowayohmygodyoureanavenger”

• “no ned,,, only when they need me to be”

• *led to him asking 100000 questions*

• “does Mr. America smell like old man”

• “what language does Ms. Widow think in”

• “how many shirts does Mr. Hulk own”

• “so do they wear normal clothes or are they always PREPARED”

• “does your dad have to walk a weird way when hes in his suit”

• “do they ever chafe in their suits”

• “yes ned. we’re stocked up on baby powder”

• which you didnt mind bc it felt nice telling the truth

• ned WANTED TO TELL PETER SO BAD

• “ned no, i don’t want him to think of me differently”

• he understood. but still defended peter and said that hed still treat you the same

• anyway,,, peter started showing up with bruises and stuff which had you v concerned

• “pete what’s up? you’ve been avoiding ned and i and you have skipped out on every movie night since sophomore year started”

• “t’s nothing. dont worry ab it”

• “peter cmon, it’s just me”

• you figured maybe it had to do with ben??? but you gave him his space. you just wanted to be there for him yanno. you didnt want him to shut you out

• “Y/N I SAID ITS NOTHING. FOR FUCKS SAKE CAN YOU LEAVE ME ALONE???” he snapped (and not in the good way)

• and this was on your way to class so the whole hallway heard

• ouch

• so you left him alone. probably more than he meant. but it hurt

• i mean he was your first friend here, and now he yelled at you to leave you alone

• ned felt awful at first. trying to comfort you and tell you it wasnt your fault

• but then he started acting weird. whenever you brought up peter hed be super antsy about it

• you- “i think he got into another fight or something”

• ned- “pFFT PETER? FIGHTING? no way,,, i got-i gotta go”

• so you figured that whatever peter was hiding, ned knew about,, which also hurt your feelings

• so you closed off

• and wow could the super family tell something was wrong

• wanda- “little stark, i can feel your sadness all the way to my room”

• sam/bucky/rhodes- “okay what’s the deal, we’ve played 5 rounds of fortnite and you havent once rage quit even though you’re doing terrible”

• tony- “kid, what’s wrong? everyone here can tell you’re not feeling great”

• nat- “cmon. ive given you 3 opportunities to kick my ass and you havent once complained about me going easy?”

• thor- “lady y/n what is causing you distress? not once have you smiled, i even wore my hair in pigtails,,, and that seems to always do the trick”

• and you gave the same response every time “‘m just tired” “lots of homework”

• they noticed you werent going out on weekends anymore

• so tony figured that your friend group and you were having some Stuff

• pep gave him an idea of meeting his new prodigy

• now tony knew it’d be kinda sus because peter went to midtown but he figured that if the kid kept his mask on it’d be fine

• “dad i don’t wanna see another one of your weird maid robots”

• “wha- no i want you to meet someone”

• “dad college isn’t for another 2 years. if it’s your friend from MIT-“

• then right before your eyes was the insect boy that youve been admiring through the internet

• needless to say

• your jaw dripped

• “y/n meet spiderling, spiderling meet my daughter y/n stark”

• *seconds pass*

• “i uh- oH- um- sp-spidERman, h-hi. biG fan of you- your work”

• *silence*

• you- “oH dad diD you hear th-that? moM is calling mE”

• tony- “what?? pep wouldve called on the interco-“

• spiderman- “y/n”

• you- SHOOK TO THE CORE BECAUSE YOU KNEW THAT VOICE. THAT WAS THE VOICE THAT SOUNDED LIKE HONEY BUT COULD CUT YOU DEEPER THAN ANY WEAPON IN YOUR HOUSE

• you- “p-peter???”

• tony- *shocked pikachu face* “you know each other???”

• you- “so-something like that yeah”

• peter takes off his mask

• “ohmygodpeterisspiderman”

• “ohmygodyourlastnameisntsmith”

• tony- “im gonna let you guys figure this out” *walks backward slowly*

*insert silence*

• you- “so this is what you were hiding, huh?” with a cold tone

• “IM HIDING? YOU LIED ABOUT YOUR WHOLE HOME LIFE TO NED AND I”

• *yelling at each other for another minute. even though you couldnt hear what the other is saying*

• you- *yelling loudest “I DIDNT WANT YOU TO SEE ME DIFFERENTLY OKAY”

• peter- “you really thought id do that?” (heartbreaking voice)

• you- “i- once i got to know you, i knew you wouldnt but i was scared. i didn’t know how to tell you. for once in my life i had found someone my age who liked ME for ME. not for my name or money or my dad. and i didn’t want to change that. i’m sorry i didn’t tell you sooner”

• peter- “... i get what you mean. after ben died everyone gave me that look. except you and ned.”

• you- “why didn’t you tell me”

• peter- “everyone i love or ever cared about dies. my parents and then my uncle ben. so once i got my abilities i knew that the risk was even higher and i didn’t want to put you in that position. i wanted to keep you safe. but it seems like you know how to handle yourself” (referring to the fact that you grew up with THE EARTHS MIGHTIEST HEROS)

• y/n- “so how come ned found out?”

• peter *scratches back of neck* “well- he- i- May let him in my room and i happen to be crawling on the ceiling in my suit and he dropped the death star” *head hangs in shame*

• you had to giggle at that i mean CMON

• you stepped closer to him

• “pete you’re my best friend. you can tell me anything okay?”

• “no more secrets?”

• “no more secrets”

• and you both pinky promise and your thumbs “kiss” bc IF THEY ITS THE ULTIMATE UNBREAKABLE VOW DONT @ ME

• peter parker gives you the biggest hug that maKES YOUR HEART JUMP BC PHYSICAL CONTACT WITH A PERSON AS PRETTY AS HIM MAKES YOUR HEART FEEL A CERTAIN WAY

• but you wrapped your arms around his neck and enjoyed the moment

• wow he is really cozy

• * the avengers are watching from the cameras in awe*

• led to MANY questions at dinner

• and so everything went back to “normal”

• it wasn’t until you went to bed that night that you realized peter said the L word

• WHAT

• so much for no secrets

taglist: @silver-winter-wolf @emmmmszy @everythingaboutnothingsstuff @rexorangecouny @wishiwasanavenger @marjoherbo @nologinisoksothatsit @mindset-jupiter @hpnjrph @soup238

some favs/mutrals: @h-osterfield @starksparker @stuckonspidey @sunshinehollandd @keepingupwiththeparkers @hey-marlie @spyder-bites

[dovechim]

thy cup runneth over (m)

➾ jeon jungkook x reader, mentions of ot7 x reader 

➾ 2.2k

➾ warnings: dirty talk, name calling, mentions of polyamory relationships, hand jobs, lots of cum

➾ jungkook needs help with his dick cup in his pants. 

➾ a/n: please dont ask what this was. i dont even know myself anymore :”) 

The dressing room is an absolute mess. People running around like chickens with their heads cut off, clothes strewn everywhere, shoes all over the floor just waiting to trip someone. It’s always like this before showtime, all hell breaks loose and you really feel like one of these days you might actually trip over a boot that Namjoon left lying around and break your neck.

“Hey where’s my right shoe?” Namjoon yells from the other room with a jacket half on his lanky frame, a dozen makeup artists hovering around him to make sure he doesn’t mess up his hair.

You toss the shoe to him, muttering under your breath about how no one ever uses the shoe racks provided before going back to helping Yoongi with his jacket. It’s a slight struggle to get the sparkly blazer over his frame, and you can’t help but notice how much broader he has grown since the start of the tour. Even his biceps feel a lot thicker when you grasp them on pretence of helping him with his jacket.

“I know, I know…” Yoongi grumbles under his breath before you can say anything. “I’ll slim down from now on. The golden brat’s been dragging me to his workouts lately.”

“What?” You frown and put your hands on his shoulders, turning him to face you fully. “Who said you could do that? You look nice like this. If you want to bulk up, just do it. I’ll just alter your jackets.”

A brief hint of a smile ghosts across his lips as he brushes his thumb against your elbow in thanks, adjusting his earpiece before his attention is stolen away by a stage manager. You’re just staring after his ass that seems to fill out his pants so much better now when a shout interrupts you.

“Noona, come help me with this,” a demanding voice calls from the other side of the room behind the privacy screen.

Sighing regretfully, you tear your gaze away from Yoongi’s ass- it almost seems to rival Jimin’s now- as you head towards the corner of the room. “What is it- oh my god!”

You immediately close your eyes and whirl around to prevent yourself from seeing anything unholy, putting your hand over your eyes for extra protection. “Jungkook- why the fuck are your pants down?”

It’s not like you aren’t used to things like these, after all, when working with a bunch of sweaty boys under a time limit, things tend to get a little R rated sometimes. But you haven’t actually seen any of them in the flesh, thank god. And if you have anything to say about it, Jeon Jungkook’s will not be the first dick that you see.

“Put some fucking pants on!” You hiss with your back still turned. “For fuck’s sake!”

“I can’t,” Jungkook whines from behind you.

“Everyone’s nearly ready to go and you’re still- come on Jeon, you have to be on in ten!” You turn around carefully with your hand still over your eyes. “Is it safe? Can I look?”

“Noona, I can’t put my pants on,” Jungkook repeats again in a calm voice, and you peek in between your fingers, careful to keep your eyes strictly above chin level. “I can’t put my pants on, I need help with my cup.”

Occasionally the boys have to wear pants without underwear because they’re too tight, and usually they wear athletic cups for a little support. It’s a well-known fact in this industry and no one really makes a big deal about it, you’ve never had to deal with it head on like this before. None of the boys have ever explicitly asked for help in dealing with something as private as this before, and you have to admit that you’re at a loss for words.

Jungkook has the gall to smirk at you as he glances down at his crotch before meeting your eyes again. He lifts an expectant brow as he crosses his arms. “Like you said, we don’t have much time, so if I were you, Noona…”

You close your eyes and sigh briefly. “What’s the problem with it? What do you need help with, specifically? Do I have to… touch it?”

“It’s too small,” Jungkook says simply. “I need a bigger cup. Can you get me one?”

“What?” You narrow your eyes and almost glance down, but manage to stop yourself just in time. “Haven’t you always used the same one? Why would you need a bigger one all of a sudden?”

His answer is simple, and it sets your blood boiling. Jungkook shrugs. “Puberty.”

You hit him over the head hard, and feel no remorse for it whatsoever. “Puberty stopped for you years ago, you stupid punk.”

“Well, unless you want me to go out there with my dick hanging out…” Jungkook sighs as he makes a move to leave the privacy screen, and you panic, placing your hands on his chest and pushing him back in.

“Stay here, I’ll be right back,” you glare at him before sprinting to the supplies room.

You don’t get paid enough for this. But you need your job, need to pay off that stack of bills waiting for you at home, need that tiny bit of enjoyment that comes from ordering a new bag online, amongst other things.

“Get me an XL cup, noona!” He yells over the chaos of the entire room, and heat singes your cheeks when the Taehyung whoops in approval.

“If he needs XL, I’ll need XXL!” Seokjin retorts in response, turning towards you and unbuttoning his pants, causing you to shriek and close your eyes in fear, nearly crashing into someone else.

“Woah, hey, be careful,” a pair of hands grabs your shoulders and you carefully open your eyes only to see Jimin’s warm smile.

“God, Jimin, sorry,” you breathe out as you make to step around him, but Jimin doesn’t let go.

“XL cup for Jungkookie? You know I’m using the only XL cup we have, right?” Jimin smirks as he pushes his bangs off his forehead. You actually feel your throat dry up at the sight of his piercing gray eyes, but then you snap back to your senses and push him aside.

“Shut up, Park, we all know you’re a medium on a good day,” you brush past him and push open the supplies room door. What is it with these boys today? It’s like all of them are suddenly the horny teenagers that they really are and they’re breathing down your neck.

You rummage around in a few boxes for a while before you come across the right one, full of athletic cups for various sizes. As you sift through them all, it’s painfully obvious that they’re mostly mediums and larges, a few smalls here and there, but no XLs, much less XXLs. You wonder if you can really send Jungkook out there without a cup, but what are you supposed to do if you can’t find a size for him? Even ordering a cup online would take a few days at the minimum.

You’re almost at the bottom of the box with no luck when you pull out a few plastic packages to check the sizes, and to your relief, one of them reads XL. Shoving the box back into place, you race back into the main dressing room, checking your watch to make sure you still have enough time.

Jungkook is still waiting with his pants down behind the privacy screen when you shove the cup at his chest.

“Hurry up, we’re out of time.”

“Can you help me with it?” Jungkook’s pleading voice stops you from leaving immediately, and he grabs your wrist with his other hand. “It’s hard to get it on by myself, and-“

You don’t get paid enough for this. You love your job. You love your job. You need your job.

Holding your breath, you turn around and steel yourself, glancing down at his crotch with your heart pounding in your chest, only to discover that he’s almost fully hard. His cock is dripping with pre cum, and you swear under your breath.

“Jungkook, what the fuck? Of course it’s hard to get it on when you’re sporting a literal hard-on!”

“You were checking out Yoongi hyung’s ass just now, weren’t you?” Jungkook asks calmly, as if his dick isn’t hanging out of his pants, and it isn’t five minutes to showtime. “Is something going on between you and him?”

“What? No- we’re not- I mean, what does that matter?” You avert your eyes from his cock. “Jungkook, you need to calm down, just… think unsexy thoughts or something.”

“How can I think unsexy thoughts with you right in front of me, noona?” Jungkook smirks as his eyes linger on your collarbone exposed by your shirt. “ And if anything’s going on with you and him, I want in too,” Jungkook continues as if you haven’t said anything. “We all do, noona. We were talking about it last night, and we decided we could share you. One of us for everyday of the week. And I get you first.”

It feels as if all the air has been sucked out of the room, and suddenly, it’s hard to breathe. You blink hard, hoping to finally wake up from this daydream, nightmare, fantasy, whatever, but when you open your eyes, Jungkook is still there with his dick out, his dark, smoldering eyes appraising your lips.

“We can’t talk about this right now,” you take a deep breath and steel yourself, glancing behind you to make sure that the privacy screen is secure. “Keep your mouth shut.”

You grab his dick and smooth your thumb over his head, spreading the sticky liquid over his entire length as you start to pump him up and down at a rapid pace, hoping to get him off as fast as possible. He feels hot and hard in your palm, thicker than you expected, and after a while your arm starts to ache, but Jungkook’s little whines and pants spur you on.

“Fuck, that’s so good, you feel so good,” he pants as he leans forward to bury his face into your neck. “Hyungs and I were talking about how tight your pussy would feel. Who’d be the first to be inside you. The first to cum inside you. Which one of our cocks would make you scream the loudest.”

Hearing the youngest say such filthy words almost takes your breath away, but you force yourself to focus on the task at hand, literally. Against your will you start to imagine what it would be like if all the boys had their turns with you, if you were to get on your knees for all of them like some kind of commonplace slut. The thought both shames and arouses you, and you unconsciously rub your thighs together.

Jungkook spots it immediately, his hands coming to cup your hips and pull you into his chest so that his sticky cock brushes against your shirt, leaving a trail behind as you pump him up and down.

“You like that? Getting on your knees for all of us and letting us all cum on your face.” Jungkook thrusts into your hand when your strokes slow down. “Who knew you’d be such a bad girl, hmm? Let me cum all over your tits.”

Sinking down onto your knees, you draw your shirt over your head to expose your satin bra as Jungkook takes over stroking his cock. From your view on your knees, the sight of his sweaty neck, his teeth sinking into his bottom lip and his small little whines and moans has you closing your eyes and eagerly awaiting the warm splash of his seed on your skin. Jungkook cums with a stifled moan of your name, swearing as he jerks his cock furiously so that every drop of his semen lands on your skin, soaking your bra completely.

He milks his cock dry, shuddering as the aftershocks of his orgams run through his body. Junkook glances down to take in the sight of your cum soaked bra before you carefully pull your shirt down to hide it, and he sighs in disappointment.

There is a knock on the privacy screen, and you recognise Yoongi’s voice. “Hey, finish up in there, we’re on in two minutes.”

Your panicked gaze shifts over to Jungkook, but he only shrugs nonchalantly.

“He knows about this? I thought it was just some twisted porn fantasy of yours,” you hiss at him as he motions for you to hand him the athletic cup still on the floor.

“It was true, every single word,” Jungkook admits. “We are serious about sharing you, noona. That is, if you want to.”

You keep your lips tightly pressed together as you gently tuck his soft cock into his pants, sliding the cup over it and making sure everything is in place. Jungkook shifts a little from overstimulation, but you zip him up and pull at your shirt uncomfortably.

Jungkook picks up his hoodie from the floor and hands it to you. Before he can say anything, however, Jimin peeks his head in, disappointed to find everything already over. But then his eyes land on your soaked, almost translucent shirt with a greasy little smirk.

“Tomorrow it’s my turn right?”