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Teyvat's "Most Down Bad" Award Goes to Alhaitham for a Second Year Running
Seeing everyone making fun of Alhaitham for his "stalkerish" tendencies in this event is funny, because I feel like a lot of people missed that "Be literally everywhere Kaveh is" has been Alhaitham's MO from the day Kaveh appeared in the game.
From only grabbing his house keys after Kaveh returned from the desert (he couldn't have had both sets of keys at the end of the Archon Quest unless he went home and got Kaveh's copy) to ditching conversations to get back to his house only after Kaveh came home, to showing up without any warning or explanation in Kaveh's hangout with some ridiculous excuse about hearing his voice through noise-cancelling headphones... Refusing to offer any help in the Temple of Silence story quest other than staying in the library with Kaveh...
Since when does Alhaitham willingly cover anyone else's duties?
But this trend of "Be everywhere Kaveh is" didn't start when they were adults. It was already in place when they were still Akademiya students--and it's a trend that didn't end even when they had their fight.
Even when they weren't speaking, Alhaitham dogged Kaveh's every step through published responses to Kaveh's research articles in academic journals. He insisted on keeping a line of communication between himself and Kaveh open, even if the only way to do that was through very public ideological clashes. Pulling Kaveh's pigtails to get his attention lolol. It's implied that, for at least the few years between their fight and Kaveh moving in, this was the only communication between them--Alhaitham's refusal to allow their connection to entirely fade away. (And the fact that this is revealed in Kaveh's character stories--through his precious journal that records the moments of his life that had the most impact on him--shows just how deeply he values the fact that Alhaitham didn't give up.)
Another relevant side note: Alhaitham never asked Kaveh to give up his half of their house. Knowing half of it belonged to Kaveh, knowing that Kaveh may one day want to reclaim his part of it, knowing that it was listed as theirs, Alhaitham moved into the house and made zero effort to change its ownership. He was completely fine with living in "his and Kaveh's house." The stories suggest it was only months later (or even longer) that Kaveh even noticed he had the house, and he transferred away ownership of his portion without Alhaitham ever asking him (or even seemingly wanting him) to do so.
Please, let that sink in. Alhaitham actively left his grandmother's (presumably comfortable) house to move into "his and Kaveh's house," with no apparent explanation for why, and after doing so, he made no attempt to change that "his and Kaveh's" label. He moved into the house with no promise that Kaveh wouldn't show up on the doorstep the very next day and move in too. It almost feels like another deliberate provocation--I've moved into our house, are you going to come stop me? LBR, if Alhaitham had had his way, Kaveh would have been living there with him from Day 1...
There's also the fact that Kaveh literally can't write on a single message board anywhere in the entire nation of Sumeru without Alhaitham hunting his messages down and responding to them (which absolutely no one else does, by the way).
"NUH-UH!" "UH-HUH." "NUH-UH!"
Alhaitham's own character stories tell us explicitly that one of Alhaitham's defining character traits is "He is never where you need him to be," yet somehow...
Shot, and chaser:
Any time Kaveh is in the slightest bit of need or danger or just wants Alhaitham near, Alhaitham is "coincidentally" exactly where Kaveh needs him to be, whenever Kaveh needs him to be there.
Alhaitham didn't just "happen" to run into Kaveh in Port Ormos, an entirely different city from where he was supposed to be working. He didn't just "happen" to read the same terrible book as Kaveh when we know he otherwise would not waste a moment of his time on poorly-written literature...
He didn't just "happen" to appear when Kaveh was upset and needed a distraction in the House of Daena during Kaveh's hangout. He didn't just "happen" to be sitting around waiting when Kaveh needed answers after the Archon Quest. He didn't just "happen" to find Kaveh's academic publications and every single message board posting and respond to them at length and in public.
Which is exactly what Kaveh's mother told Kaveh he needed.
What level of down bad is "Abusing your powers as an Akademiya employee to keep tabs on your crush's library loans"? Just asking for a friend.
The only person for whom Alhaitham just "happens" to be available is Kaveh, over and over and over again--because he is very deliberately making himself a constant presence in Kaveh's life.
(Like, out of all things, I think people really underestimate the devs deliberately paralleling the romantic relationship between Kaveh's mother and father with Kaveh and Alhaitham's relationship. If you want to point to one thing that says "These two characters are intentionally queer-coded," it doesn't get any more obvious than this.)
Alhaitham, are you not embarrassed to be this transparent??? 🫣
#genshin impact#haikaveh#kavetham#alhaitham#kaveh#I wasn't even looking for half these screencaps#I was just scrolling through the content and “Oops; there's another one”#imagine thinking it's a “coincidence” to run into someone in a desert that stretches hundreds to thousands of miles#I say this in the most positive way possible#but I think Alhaitham might actually need an intervention#bro is reading PULP FICTION for a man#checking the message boards daily for updates from a dude he already lives with#skipping work to do favors for his favorite#I would say his Kaveh hyper-focus is impacting his quality of life#but Kaveh IS his quality of life so...#do you think the merchants in the market are getting savvy#when they see Alhaitham coming they're just like#“Oh Mister Alhaitham! Mister Kaveh was really admiring this painting the last time he came through--”#how many times do you think Alhaitham's brought home new foods only to never buy them again because Kaveh didn't like them?#we could end world deforestation with Alhaitham's pining alone
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LET HIM GET UP LET HIM GET UP
#NO! LEAVE THAT MAN ALONE!#sometimes its embarrassing watching this part like bro only got a few punches in#let charles be a badass GOD#i get that he was fighting apocalypse BUT THIS IS LITERALLY CHARLES DOMAIN WHY IS HE GETTING BEAT#apocalypse wiping the floor with him damn#they really giving charles the damsel in distress roles IM CRYING#that man literally has military training please ☹️#my phone updated now my emojis are too big pissing me off#he’s literal the worlds most powerful telepath why is he losing in the astral plane?? 😧#if people weren’t so pissy about telepathy charles wouldn’t have to limit himself so much#anti-telepathy people i am coming for you (and not in the good way)#honestly this was all probably an excuse for jean to be cool but she could’ve done that herself we didn’t need to beat charles to a pulp#charles xavier#professor x#x men#anti xmen apocalypse#xmcu#cherik#wish does not shut up
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I think Dakkar should play that organ while they’re on the Nautilus.
#GUHHHHHHHHH#god this took ages but it’s finally done#I went all out for this one yall#I’m so pleased with how this turned out#I had the idea ages ago#I really latched onto the line about Dakkar having an organ on the Nautilus#and I felt compelled to draw him playing it#that perspective was so hard to get down but I think it ended up looking pretty good if I say so myself#god I love Dakkar so much#I love drawing him#also I headcannon the radiance as something that is so deeply embedded into those from the blazing world that it radiates from their bones#also I thought it would look cool#I just really love pulp musicals guys#fun fact: the full moon always rises at sunset#back at it again with the fun facts 🔥🔥🔥#pulp musicals#dakkar pulp musicals#jesse bhamrah#pulp 4#pulp 4 spoilers#it’s like- it’s a hypothetical that involves spoiler details I suppose#the searcher in the shadows#the searcher in the shadows spoilers#tsits spoilers#tsits#my art
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coffee shop au in touchstarved except it's a bar au where mc crashes at leander's bar to drink their sorrows away and leander falls in love at first sight so he asks for their name and writes "hey (horribly misspelt name) hmu xxx-6969-420 <333 - leander" on their shot glass but the ink gets on their hand and the drink tastes like shit anyways so they smash the glass into his face call that a bloody mary without the x 3 step
#kuras as the bouncer who just looks away like the ceiling is the most important thing in the world#touchstarved game#True x readers are the ones where the only tension between you is beef#enough of getting together with them. sometimes you need to beat that man to a pulp n it's ok
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art by Samson Pollen (1960s-1970s)
#samson pollen#pulp art#men's magazines#pulp artist#crime stories#adventure stories#illustrations#stag magazine#man's world magazine#sixties#1970s
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Gerard Quinn (1927-2015), ''New Worlds'', Vol. 11, #4, 1951 *Slaps side of Dimensional Door* "This bad boy holds so many paths to the multiverse and countless unspeakable cosmic horrors."
#Gerard Quinn#irish artists#northern irish artist#new worlds#pulp science fiction#pulp scifi#black and white illustration#black & white art#scifi art#science fiction art#retreading tired memes
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Who doesn't love the boosh?
#actors#con air#steve buscemi#adam sandler#comedy film#comedy#thriller#boardwalk empire#fargo#resevoir dogs#pulp fiction#quentin tarantino#grown ups#the big lebowski#the sopranos#monsters inc#hotel transylvania#mr deeds#big daddy#airheads#spy kids 2#ghost world#monster house#boss baby#sandra bullock#nicolas cage#scarlett johansson#jeff bridges#voice acting#tim roth
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World Of Men Sep 1968
Norman Saunders
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GUYS
GUYS (+everyone else too ig)
So we all know brain dead/dead tired right? Tim x Danny?
Consider the following:
Tim as Gun Batman x Dan
Think about it!
Tim and Danny are extremely good friends (read, oblivious and head over heels). They start telling the other about their trauma. They start joke arguing about whose evil future self would win in a fight.
Danny realizes, hey, we can actually figure this out, and gives clockwork some puppy dog eyes to let them drop Dan and whoop ‘em GunTim style (Drake, for simplicity’s sake) somewhere they can’t hurt anyone. Mars, maybe.
It. Ah- Backfires. Spectacularly.
#ryan’s shouts into the void#up to you if I mean they start making out in the middle of the battlefield or they take over the world together#I like to think they bring each other bodies like a cat waking you up with a dead bird#i dub this ship#bloody grins#because i like the mental imagery that conjures#or possibly#dead bird#/#dead dove#dead tired#brain dead#danny fenton#danny phantom#tim drake#red robin#dp x dc prompt#dp x dc#dpxdc#Tim: This guy says he’s smarter than you!#Danny: Dan! I found someone wo can beat you into a pulp!#Dan & Drake: I’m gonna kill him!#Dan & Drake. locking eyes over the supposed-to-be battlefield: Oh no. He’s hot.#Dan & Drake. out of breath and exhausted and pissed that it was a *fucking draw*: well shit. guess i have to fuck him now.
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Vintage Pulp - Other Worlds (Nov1949)
Art by Richard S. Shaver
Clark Magazines
#Magazines#Other Worlds#Science Fiction#Fantasy#Pulp#Richard S Shaver#Clark Magazines#Vintage#Art#Lemuria#1949#1940s#40s
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#IFTTT#Flickr#elgatogomez#retro#midcenturymodern#outerspace#scifi#sciencefiction#flying#saucer#ufo#alien#futuristic#pulp#war#worlds#art
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doodle from last night! i blame @boxwinebaddie for getting me excited about goth/jersey again ♥
#pine art#stan marsh#kyle broflovski#jersey kyle#goth stan#goth stan marsh#kyley-b#sp style#stankyle#sp stanky#head in my hands. they are my world.#its been ages since i got a proper blabberramble in someone and im havin the time of my life#talking to other creatives makes me wanna run in circles chasing my tail for an hour. yknow?#i know his shirt canonly has edgar on it but listen. it was midnight. i wasn't gonna draw edgar#OR if i did i'd draw like. bsd edgar as a litlte in-joke for myself#anyways. every time someone picks on goth stan. kyley is there to threaten them into a pulp#and i think thats awesome. he's never felt empathy before and this guy is changing him#ALSO jk's visual look is based more on the gelled look he did in later seasons? i think the original jersey style is fun#but he did that in like. ten minutes.#i think if he had the time/want to Actually style himself#it'd be a lot prettier and kinder to him
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"Fire was a mystery to them, but they died by it and were long in so doing.”
Virgil Finlay (1914–1971) - Illustration for H. Warner Munn's 'King of the World's Edge'
(Weird Tales - December 1939)
#virgil finlay#king of the world's edge#h. warner munn#weird tales#horror art#fantasy art#pulp art#art#story illustration#illustration
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I’m so happy that school is back so I can have motivation to draw!!!
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#really just me my yard sale glitter pens and my crayons against the world#why would I pay attention in school when I could be doodling in my tiny sketch book??!?#starkid#hatchetfield#pulp musicals#anna hanover#Addison pulp musicals#kal pulp musicals#skud hatchetfield#skud#my art!!
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(via Pulp International - Third cover for The Worlds Worst Women by Bernard Odonnell)
cover by Lou Marchetti
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Lizard Tyrant of the Twilight World - art by Dan Zolnerowich
#dan zolnerowich#planet comics#40s sci-fi art#pulp art#comic art#cover art#lizard tyrant of the twilight world#fiction house publishing#1940s#1943
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