#puberty speedrun

[ghostly-hitch-hiker]

Chapters: 1/? Fandom: Danny Phantom, DCU, Batman - All Media Types Rating: Mature Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Danny Fenton & Jazz Fenton, Danny Fenton & Tucker Foley & Sam Manson, Danny Fenton & Bruce Wayne, Batfamily Members & Danny Fenton, Clockwork & Danny Fenton Characters: Danny Fenton, Jazz Fenton, Clockwork (Danny Phantom), Bruce Wayne, Dick Grayson, Jason Todd, Sam Manson, Tucker Foley, Penelope Spectra Additional Tags: Aged-Up Danny Fenton, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, eventually the batfam will enter, Psychological Trauma, probably, references to Dan but he doesn't actually show up, Ghost King Danny Fenton, This Is Not Going To Go The Way You Think, Danny Fenton Needs A Hug, Good Sibling Jazz Fenton Summary:

Danny Fenton wakes up one morning having seemingly aged about twenty years overnight. It's not his parents' fault; nor is it any of the usual suspects. After a totally professional and civil conversation with Clockwork, Danny starts to grasp that there isn’t any way to undo this anytime soon—at least, not in Amity Park. So Danny leaves. His parents don’t recognize him. His friends and his sister are almost two full decades younger than him.

With the rest of the U.S. light-years ahead of Amity in terms of technology, Danny makes do—and makes Gotham his base of operations. The police don’t care about some slightly wonky paperwork, and neither does his landlord. He’s pretty sure he can stay clear of The Bats while he’s in the city anyway (courtesy of ghost powers), and he’ll be spending most of his time around the continental US trying to figure out what the hell even happened to him. It’s as foolproof of a plan as it could be. He totally won’t get into any trouble living in the world’s greatest detective’s hometown!

He does not account for it also being Bruce Wayne and his family’s hometown…

[martyryo]

They gave me a headache

[little-pondhead]

Nature vs. Nurture vs. Whatever the Hell This Is

-

Vlad fucked up.

To be fair, just because he was smart enough to figure out how to make a clone, didn’t mean he was good at it. That became very obvious when the first few clones of Danny melted. Then Danielle destabilized, and Danny had to save her.

By the time the events of AGIT came about, Vlad thought he’d perfected the practice. Dan had a new body and a second chance at life, and Vlad now had a son like he always wanted. They both gained a family, and Danny was happy for them.

However, after a few years, Dan was the first to realize that he and Dani weren’t aging. Danny was.

Through panicked calls and the digging of old files, Vlad discovered that while he’d forcefully grown both Danielle and Dan’s human bodies to what they were now, he’d somehow frozen the intrinsic and extrinsic aging processes.

Both Danielle and Dan were more ghost than human, and with Danny finally bringing peace to Amity Park, their bodies simply did not react to any of the normal stressors in the human world. They didn’t breathe oxygen, they didn’t have to fight off world ending threats every week, and they just simply didn’t expose themselves to enough ectoplasm to continue new cell production. (They even tested this theory by cutting off a lock of Dani’s hair and waiting a few months. It didn’t grow at all!)

Their bodies were just…frozen in time.

Well, damn.

Both Dan and Dani wanted to be on their own by now, but their eternal baby faces were making it impossible. Danny was well off into college at this point, having grown into the Fenton genes quite well, and looked like their older brother or dad rather than Dan’s twin.

Cue a coming-of-age story featuring Dan and Dani as they, quite literally, try to force themselves to grow up and match their mental ages.

[baby-xemnas]

⚠️ age manipulation

Keep running your mouth and he is gonna speedrun puberty (🐯 without spots because he meets 🐻‍❄️ in the novel after he fully heals himself)

[legendofzoodles]

Four: Try explaining your fight with Ganon or whatever evil was wrecking your kingdom, but without context.

Wind: Old-ass wizard kicks around some minors while the only other adult is a shapeshifting boat-man who prioritised claiming some triangles. Beat that. 

Four: I’m sorry, what?

Wind: That’s how Grandma saw it. But I get it, he did take a few pot shots at me and especially Tetra.

Time: [remembering when Ganondorf, chasing after Zelda on horseback, stopped his pursuit solely to blast a 9 year old in the face and monologue]

Time: Sounds like him.

---

Wild: Appointed knight finally fulfills his mission after waiting 100 years to reload his save.

The Chain: What?

Time: That sucks, I only waited seven. 

The Chain: What?!

---

Twilight: Local ranch-hand stops a nightmare induced apocalypse alongside an imp who’s a princess and a hermit, who’s also a princess.  

Time: [clears his throat]

Twilight: After screaming at the moon vocal coaching from a ghost stalking the entire journey, who wasn’t a princess. 

---

Sky: Local daydreamer wakes up, fights god, and wins. 

Wild: I mean...did you though?

Legend: Yeah, jury’s still out on that one.

---

Hyrule: Mute kid brutalises pigman after assembling wish granting triangles, and saves the princess. He does it again years later.

Wild: You were silent back then?

Hyrule: Well, I couldn’t speak because I didn’t know the language. After saving the first Zelda she asked members of the nobility teach me- and how to read and write.

Twilight: Did you bite them when they tried to scold you for getting an answer wrong?

Hyrule: You did that too?!

---

Warriors: Pairs of powerful fighters from across the ages band together to defeat creepy time sorceress, then conquer red-maned wizard. 

Legend: Ugh, the power of friendship. Really?

Warriors: Comradery, actually. 

Legend: [mimicking his tone] Cringe, actually. 

---

Legend: Which one?

Four: Choose your favourite.

Legend: [thinks for a moment] A scarf wearing hooded hobo breaks into my house on several occasions and stages a coup to save two worlds. 

Four: What...were you doing?

Legend: [sighing] All the hard work. 

~~~

Thanks for reading! 

Masterlist

9th place in the LU character design ranking

Character analysis posts:

Hero of the Sky, Hero of Time, Hero of Twilight, Hero of the Wild, Hero of Warriors

Parkour team - LU drabble

How each member of the chain laughs - LU headcanon

I didn't know what to do for Time since I've already made the speedrunning puberty joke and I don't know much about Four's adventures.

[woso-dreamzzz]

My Wife

Andrea Medina x Reader

Summary: You've known Andrea for a very long time

The first day you met Andrea Medina, you got married.

It was out in the schoolyard. It was your first day and she came bounding up to you, took your hand and said she was going to marry you.

You were shy so you agreed and you got married to her under the apple tree.

You remained by her side for most of your life. You couldn't even remember what it was like without her.

You were joined at the hip throughout your childhood. You would wait outside of training for her after school so you could get the bus back together. She would hang behind when you went to the library to study. You walked hand in hand everywhere together.

When people questioned it, Andrea would always respond the same way," I married her under the apple tree. I'm just being a good wife."

When you first married her, she gave you a Haribo ring to symbolise your love. It had been eaten by the end of the day.

She gave you a paper ring next. You wore it for weeks on end until one day it was raining and it ripped, falling straight off your finger.

After that came Andrea's own mother's wedding ring, which she had slipped off the woman's finger when she was asleep and brought into school for you. Your parents made you give it back though and Andrea just started holding your hand more in answer.

It was somewhat of a tradition, every year, to find an apple tree and get 'married' all over again. It started off as a cute thing little kids did but feelings developed almost as soon as you both hit puberty.

The change from best friends to girlfriends happened seamlessly for you both and soon Andrea was introducing you to everyone she could like she was bragging about something special.

"Hi, Miss Gallardo!" You said as you waited in the stands for Andrea to finish training.

"How many times have I said it? You don't need to call me Miss Gallardo. Lola is just fine."

Your face went a little red at the correction. "Right. Yes. Sorry, Miss Lola."

Lola groaned good naturedly, shaking her head fondly at you. "Andrea!" She yelled," Your girlfriend's here!"

Usually, after you finished your university classes, you would head straight to training to see Andrea so you were a very familiar sight to see waiting.

"She's not my girlfriend!" Andrea yelled back," She's my wife!"

Lola laughed, tucking you under her arm as she walked you over to your girlfriend. "No ring on her finger, no wife."

"She ate the first one!" Andrea complained, an arm coming out to wrap around your waist.

"It was very sweet," You replied, pressing a kiss to her cheek," And she did get me a ring." You pulled up the silver chain around your neck so Lola could see the ring hanging from it.

She rolled her eyes. "A promise ring isn't a wedding ring. It's like a pre-engagement-ring ring."

"Hey!" Andrea said," Don't be rude about our love!"

Lola laughed. "God, what is it with you kids and speedrunning life? Football career, finding your forever girl. Slow down a bit. You're making the rest of us look bad."

"You don't really need help with that," Andrea teased.

"Be nice to Miss Lola," You said to her," She doesn't have to put up with you."

"Fine." Andrea kissed your cheek and squeezed your waist.

"You should stick around more, y/n. Can you come to practice every day? I've never seen her shut up so quickly."

"Happy wife, happy life," Andrea replied.

"Alright, lovebirds," Lola teased," Off you go. Go be sappy and disgusting elsewhere."

You pulled Andrea after you. She got changed and showered in record time and soon you were walking hand-in-hand down the street.

The walk back was like second nature and you leaned happily into Andrea's side as she took the lead, ducking into a little cafe to get a much needed coffee.

"My favourite married couple!" The old lady at the counter exclaimed as you both ordered.

Andrea grinned triumphantly, puffing her chest out like she did whenever someone mentioned your childhood marriage.

"Our favourite coffee maker!" You say back, putting a hefty tip in the jar.

With your coffees in hand, you and Andrea wandered through a park and up a hill. You dumped your bags just in front of the apple tree.

"Okay," Andrea said, taking your hands and pulling you to stand under it," Ready?"

"Ready."

She cleared her throat and, just like when she was younger and didn't fully understand weddings, said," I love you!"

"I love you too!"

"Marry me?"

"I do!"

"I do!"

She grinned, spinning you around. "I am going to marry you," She promised," Properly."

"Good," You said," Because I'm getting sick and tired of introducing you as my wife without a proper ring."

[facelessthefreak]

I DID PUT THE /P. I THINK. SEND PROOF OR ELSE YOURE LYING.

i love you, anyway. my silly, unserious reason for why i want to reach nirvana is I Am Not Going Through Puberty Again.

you can’t make me🫵 i’m gonna live the happiest longest most fulfilling life ever and you cannot stop me. i refused to be 13 ever again.

(anyway on a more serious note you should totally ask me about buddhism >:3 /nf)

im on my way to become a scientist just to discover something that'll make you a teenager forever. im evil >:]

(i'd love to hear more about it!! im going to ask. eventually. i dont know how to make questions about stuff.)

[phoenix--flying]

pjo characters as things my friend group has said

Hazel: I just kinda radiate towards caves

Nico: Breathing has been taken out of Nicos software

Connor: I can speedrun to your house when you're home alone

Cecil: raisins are dehydrated rats

Percy: It's a roller coaster where the only option is to die

Will: I just goooot- my jugular sliced open by a cat

Nico: We're going out tonight and killing all the homophobes. Call it a date

Will: Why am I so much taller then- Oh its cause im standing on a dead body

Connor: You're sooo welcome. I literally did nothing

Hazel: Just because your trash doesn't mean you can't do great things. It's called a trash can not a trash cannot

Piper: Cut my hair, I'll cut your throat

Thalia: Sometimes I do slap kids

Travis: When I grow up I'm gonna be a legal drug dealer

Beckendorf: I’m going to drop kick myself into space

Malcom: Briefly describe three applications that make use of the total eternal reflection of light Connor: The colour seven

Grover: Percys reaching old age, we should put him in a retirement home

Piper: Leo what did you do Leo: I may have burned down an orphanage and it may have spread to this site.

Lou Ellen: Travelling, usually done on the ceiling

Will: Imagine sitting on your couch watching TV and your phone buzzes. Reminder: Breathe

Austin: i just broke an acorn.. panic whY IS THERE AN ACORN IN MY ROOM

Nico: i feel like today happened yesterday and i just slept for all of tomorrow and woke up in the evening

Malcom: yeah i fell down the stairs and broke my spine in 3 places Connor: that's hot

Jason: Nitroglycerin. The forbidden smoothie

Will: I always look like trash. Annabeth: I know that's why I hate looking like trash

Travis: well we only have a few minutes left of class.. y'all wanna watch something explode

Piper: It sounded like you smoked 10 packs of cigarettes and then hit puberty

Jason: Imagine you get fired the day after you die

Nico: My stomach just like...started learning German

Nyssa: Leo if you don't leave, i'm shoving this desk fan up your ass

Jason: I slammed my foot on the accelerator, running multiple red lights at 220km/h, because I wanted to drive safe

Nyssa: When you go through the car wash but you forget the car

Drew: *points at trashcan* That looks like you

Nico: I only want chemistry between me and a coffin

Jake: Gotta put your wheelchair in 4Wheeldrive. Outdoor mode. Off-road mode

Leo: Murder is ok as long as its fine

Percy: Maybe if I fall asleep on my textbook I'll wake up with all the knowledge

Connor: Let's play spin the bottle but it's only you and me

Leo: Now how do we calculate the density if swiss cheese

Clarisse: I have to ask one of the experts Chris: Who are the experts? Clarisse: I don't know

Piper: Your mom is on vacation Leo: well- she's on a permanent vacation

Michael: AYO BITCH YOUR FOODS FLAMIN THE FUCK

Silena: If you're slow I'm a fucking snail

Jason: We need to hold a funeral! Percy: Here comes the bride

Beckendorf: Have you ever died? No??? Well here you go!!! Death simulator. It’s permanent!

*Annabeth and Percy sitting on a bench with drinks and a cop drives by* Percy: What if they thought we were drinking and driving Annabeth: We're not in a car

Will: I'm so smart Nico: Oh my god since when

Piper: *gives Leo a singular goldfish* Piper: Feeding the poor

Lou Ellen: Bless your soul Nico: What soul? Lou Ellen: ...good answer

Sherman: an apple a day keeps the doctor away, and anybody else if you throw it hard enough

Connor: I can see the veins in my eyes

Ellis: Whatever sinks your boat!

Cecil: You can't kill the gays if the gays kill you first

Will: dude sorry there's a knife in your grandma's face it grew wings and flew there :( Cecil: I’m sorry my knife flew out of my hand and slit that guys throat then burned it so he wouldn’t bleed

Silena: *playing Minecraft* I walked into your house and your birds started aggressively dancing at me

Lee: That's just so unfortunate for me. That is just so- oh I died

Percy: Wanna go to Toronto? Why drive just take the Earth Quake on natural disaster

Travis: The roof is just caving in on us it's fine

Michael: My arms are broken, my legs are broken, my lungs are broken, my knees are broken, I got decapitated when I was five

Connor: We're gonna die? No we're gonna beat the speedrun world record

Cecil: Hell to go down I there

Will: Mask to mask resuscitation

Travis: I may or may not have accidentally dropped a match in the building on purpose

Nico: Minecraft but I accidentally sets a school on fire

Percy: Minecraft but I die of hypothermia

Piper: Minecraft but I left my eyes at home

Jake: Minecraft but my legs are broken

Jason: Minecraft but I died

Lou Ellen: Minecraft but we're all gay

Will: If I die the game is homophobic

Cecil: Minecraft but I run my best friend over

Nico: I wanna hit a citizen with a baseball bat

Michael: Hey sir, you have Alzheimer’s. Would you like a side of bronchitis?

Silena: Why can't this be straight? Lee: Because you're not

Lou Ellen: mmmm i love my jesus fish Cecil: bro jesus fish Lou Ellen: ikr, jesus moment

[its-ya-girl-phoeni]

I think it's funny how right before he drops the bomb on this 9/yo kid that he somehow managed to speedrun puberty in the minute or so he was asleep for (from his perspective), Rauru tells Link to "not be alarmed" when he looks at himself.

[razzle-zazzle]

Would you be willing to like, info dump about your Troll pupating headcanon that appeared in your Between AU? Just elaborate on how it works and such?

YES. Putting this under a cut because it's moderately long

Okay okay so. I don't know why but trolls are like. Little bugs to me. So I want to give them a few small bug traits, make them little creatures.

And pupation seemed like the most fun way to do that. A pupa is an insect's life stage where they undergo metamorphosis between larval and adult forms. In real life, most pupation involves larval structures breaking down while adult structures like wings develop—in that case of caterpillars, the bug sees itself liquified during the process (while still retaining memories of pre-pupation! neat!).

Of course, in canon, we see baby and child trolls all the time, and they're not that different from the main characters. So troll pupation isn't as drastic as it is for most real-life insects in my headcanon; rather, it might be better described as spedrun puberty.

So. The headcanon itself. At about 12 or 13 years of age, a trolling will start to experience a surge in appetite and drop in metabolism. I'm not entirely decided yet on whether the cocoon is something that they build up over time from spun/shed hairs, or if it's something more instantaneous formed directly from their hair—though I'm leaning more towards the latter.

The troll spends most of their pupation asleep. Body structures don't need to break down to the extent seen in real-life insects, so while some semi-drastic changes do happen (genitals develop and become accessible, though they won't be fully functional for a few years yet; hair lengthens and becomes stronger + able to shift color and length; new adult teeth, fur, and claws grow in), the troll remains pretty much intact the entire way through the process.

When they emerge, the troll isn't actually a full adult yet; though most of the major changes have been ticked off, it still takes a few years of regular growth before they can be considered fully mature.

A big thing about pupations is that trolls are adaptable. And I headcanon Pop Trolls to be one of the most adaptable genres (since pop is literally defined as "whatever's popular," though the genre itself has a few defining features), though all trolls pupate regardless of genre. So trolls that are under a lot of stress or caught in unusual conditions may find themselves emerging from their pupations with new features outside of what's normally expected. These adaptations aren't super drastic—for example, a Pop Troll raised by Techno Trolls wouldn't emerge with the exact same structure as a Techno Troll; rather, they'd get webbed paws and bigger lung capacity (maybe bioluminescence if they're lucky) at the most. Lost limbs can occasionally be regrown during pupation if the injury was recent enough, and most scars will fade during pupation.

So why does Branch pupate at fifteen in my headcanons? Simple: he's gray. The lack of color is more than just a signifier of his disposition; it has direct physiological consequences with regards to Branch's growth rate and metabolism. His troll endocrine system released the necessary hormones to induce pupation late as a result. Hormones being what they are, it's possible for a fully-colored troll to have a delayed or even early pupation, but such deviation tends to be rare.

In the Between AU, Branch loses his tail at roughly thirteen years old. When he pupates about two years later, his body adapts to the whole "living with creatures twenty times his size" situation, and instead of regrowing his tail his hips and legs shifted to accommodate the new balance.

tl;dr my troll growth headcanons are a mix of mammalian (human) style puberty and buglike metamorphosis; trolls speedrun their puberty in a hair cocoon

[ghostly-hitch-hiker]

Puberty Speedrun (pt 3)

Chapter 1: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 (you are here!)

Synopsis: Danny wakes up a lot older than when he went to bed. Shenanigans ensue (eventually taking him all the way to Gotham).

After breakfast and a rather long, headache-inducing conversation with Tuck and Sam, Danny was standing in front of his bathroom sink, trying to work up the nerve to go ghost. They’d come up with no possible explanations for his Puberty Speedrun (as he had affectionately and derogatorily dubbed the situation – at Tucker’s encouragement) and everyone agreed his best bet was to question Clockwork or Frostbite in the Ghost Zone. Danny just had to go ghost.

The problem was, Danny really wasn't sure what his ghost form would look like. He hoped it would still look like his younger self. It would be easier to explain, in that there would be nothing to explain. Danny Fenton could disappear for a little while, and it would be fine as long as Danny Phantom didn’t. Also, you know, still young Danny Phantom would come with the added benefit of not dealing with whatever potential similarities there were between himself and Dan. It would be a win-win! 

Danny inhaled, and let the transformation overcome him on the exhale. Eyes squeezed shut and lungs deflated, Danny used his last breath to whisper, “Please be normal, fifteen-year-old Phantom.”

No such luck. Danny peeked beneath his eyelids to look in the mirror and practically collapsed in on himself with disappointment. 

His ghost form had also aged, and this time it was even easier to tell the differences between his aged up self and his alternate evil future. He must’ve been even older than he first thought. For one thing, Danny just looked tired. He wasn’t sure if it was his imagination or if it really was palpable in his reflection, but Danny looked like a man far too used to a smaller body. The way he slumped in on himself did not have the same effect in this older form; this body or lack thereof did not want to diminish itself and disappear the way he had once been able to as a teenager. It was strangely pathetic. Danny straightened some and continued to stare. 

Who would’ve thought ghosts could get wrinkles? They weren’t obvious, but as he stared at his own ghostly visage, he had remembered seeing them in the mirror in his human form and disregarding them. It was a bit harder to miss them now. 

Danny had always expected that as his ghost form aged, he’d start looking more and more like Dan. His reflection was both comforting and distressing in its shattering of his expectations. Black sclera. Green irises. White hair, still not flaming, but wispier than usual. Worry lines etched into his forehead and around his eyes. Slight frown lines around his mouth. His jumpsuit was the same as it had always been: simple black and white with the stylized DP. Ears slightly pointed. He opened his mouth, and yup. Those were fangs. 

If he were prone to romantic thought, he could imagine how this version of him could survive in frescoes and statues for thousands of years. There was something chiseled and stony and worn in his face and his shoulders. If Danny had actually lived the years it looked like he had, he might have even been handsome. As he was, he looked out of place. Lost.

Danny grimaced and looked away from his reflection in favor of peeling on his left glove. The scar tissue on his palm was just as gnarled and vibrant as ever. Good to know that the physical reminders of his death stayed just as fresh, he supposed. With his mental inventory of his appearance complete, Danny pulled his glove back on. It was time to head into the Ghost Zone.

---

And that’s the end of chapter 1 folks! The entirely of the first chapter is now on AO3, and chapter 2 is in the works. I’ll post chapter 2 updates on tumblr throughout the coming week, and the entirely of it will drop on AO3 next Sunday. Thank you for reading!

[ineedaplacetostay]

Y’all wanna hear more about the 13yo!Toichiro and 46yo!Sho ageswap ideas that exist in my head?

No? Well, anyway (this was written at 2am last night, but I stand by it):

There are two equally funny outcomes for flipped Claw running around in my head.

1) Claw does exist and Sho does fund it, but it’s a local thing that gives espers the opportunity to meet up, connect, and get resources. I’m gonna let Sho be a decently strong esper here, but it’s not super important to him (which drives Toich crazy.) He just wants to help :)

Very nice, but despite Sho creating it, he hands over the money and isn’t personally involved so no one really knows it’s him. 13yo!Toich has been scooping up his lil friend group from kids who come to Claw for assistance, and Sho is so oblivious to this on account of having a day job.

He thinks it’s nice Toichiro is volunteering.

2) Claw is an inter-school gang 13yo!Toich runs like the Navy while also being a top student. Sho is still oblivious because as far as he knows, his son Toichiro is a driven student with so many extracurriculars Sho’s relieved Toichiro has those five friends over while Sho’s away on business trips.

Also in this scenario, Sho thinks Toichiro is gay (he’s an ally! and bi, that’s not important) and is just hoping that Toichiro will pick Katsuya and not one of the wild ones.

—

In either option, Toich has been bullshitting everyone that his parents are not only never around, but his mom left when he was little (the latter for Serizawa specifically). Meanwhile, over in reality, Sho is busy, but keeps trying to make time for Toichiro only to be brushed off. Sho chalks it up to teen adjustments and has stopped asking why his kid spends all his free time around four other teenage boys and Minegishi. He honestly doesn’t Get™ Toichiro, but he is making that effort.

Toichiro’s mother lives in not!Osaka (Orange or something?) and he spends the summer with her. His parents picked this because they didn’t work out together and Sho’s better able to help Toich with his powers, though Toichiro’s are becoming stronger than Sho’s. She’s also an esper, but not very strong, and is trying to convince him his eyebrows are fine.

Toichiro does feel abandoned and unloved, but it’s like mostly gifted kid puberty and his parents being amicably separated talking. He thinks his parents think he’s an unstoppable monster and are terrified of him. Feels very alone, speedrunning his own personal Great Man Theory. It cannot be said enough that he is 13.

His parents are, like, worried about how he’s taking these power changes, but he won’t talk to them.

The first post-meltdown thing Toich does is ask Sho if they can call his mom.

[yellowocaballero]

DIMILETH! DIMILETH!! DIMILETH!!!!!!! *claps enthusiastically*

YEAH DIMILETH! I'M GONNA RAMBLE ABOUT IT!

There's a serious dearth of good Dimileth content, I think. A pretty high % is E and those kind of feel like dressed up xreader fics in generic aus, tbh. Considering how Byleth's entire character arc is about her growing out of being your self-insert and actualizing as a full person, I can't really get behind them. I think uh there's a truly excessive number of ways to write them badly, out of character, or both.

I've talked SEVERAL times about how I dislike those mommy gf/bf dynamics, especially in H/C. There's always a whumpee to project on, who normally has anxiety or depression and has panic attacks, and a perfect partner who provides therapy and hugs and the comfort. In real life it would be remarkably unhealthy. People are usually better about this in M/F dynamics, but it's unhealthy straight or gay. Where Dimileth comes in is: a) it is extremely easy to fall into this trap, because of how people relate to Dimitri and Byleth and Dimitri's canon relationship, and b) it is uniquely bad, because it is very similar to their teacher/student dynamic. And you want them to grow out of that. You do. For obvious reasons.

What I love about Byleth is that she is kind and nurturing, despite everything. She's so empathic, understanding, supportive, and kind towards Dimitri. I love the story of an emotionless person choosing kindness - somebody who made the conscious decision to turn away from a live of endless violence and death and choose family and love. I don't want to erase that just bc it's surface level mommy gf.

For me, what I decided on is to just flip those tables. You have to completely reconfigure that dynamic into one between two adults and equals. And I think it eventually ended up as - Byleth provided unconditional support, love, and caring to these kids, and now that she's Achieved Sadness it's her turn to receive that. You have to love to have love returned. During their little roleplay scene, Byleth experiences a wonderful feeling of safety and understanding and care. She provided that for Dimitri, and Dimitri provided that for her. She had to be the adult for a long time, on many levels she is still being expected to be the adult, but now that she's speedrunning emotional puberty she has somebody to help her through that (Narratively, it's a good balance for Dimitri himself too - as somebody who received care for a while, I do want to show that he's still an adult who's capable of providing that to others).

Whew. Normally romantic ships are uhhh not the point in anything I write, but in this fic the Dimileth encapsulates the point. Obviously in Phase 1 there was a lot of set-up for it, and equally obviously Byleth did not even passingly think of him romantically or sexually (like would she have even be capable???), but in a story about teenagers becoming adults and a girl finding humanity I think a sweet way to capture that is the insanity of somebody's first teenage love. Thanks for reading!

[roninkairi]

Since I'm trying real hard not to focus on the absolute clusterfuck that is known as US politics. lets focus on what really matters: speedrunning based game challenges that uses retro titles as the template.

Ok, to be fair, the parents of some gamers just hit puberty.

The game has a list of just about every NES title ever officially released in the system's lifespan. Even the licensed ones.

So you can't sue, Disney!

Well well...

And I'm set.

Hard is relative.

Old School in the house. However...

...in the end, there can be ONLY ONE

I should try for gold next

[call-me-kitty]

Okay NOW I post tf one spoilers (That one tagged post was my failed attempt at humor and didn’t actually have spoilers).

Anyway this is going to actually have spoilers. But to summerize for the people who don’t want spoilers: WATCH THE MOVIE! YOU WON’T REGRET IT!!!

It was amazing. I’m going back. I really truly am. I absolutely loved it.

I’ve never once been in a theater that was ALIVE. Until this movie.

Optimus became a Prime and one guy stood up yelling "Well that’s just...Prime."

Standing ovation right there.

The theatre gave a standing ovation.

Incredible.

It really was kind of a fan movie. Like it was definitely for the fans. But it also brought several newbies to the fandom because it was that good. I never thought that pre-puberty-sassy-teenaged-Megatron would exist but he does and he absolutely made it perfect. Oreon Pix (the real ones know who I’m talking about) being obsessed with history but also being a miner (MINERS?!) was a fantastic new twist that I also never expected but hey, he’s not a librarian so…idk that’s something.

Bumblebee being the most talkative and NOT losing his voice was unexpected. Relieving. But unexpected.

And can I just say, me being big on ships and not having Oplita was a stab in the heart but did you SEE the way Orion looked at her? It was practically canon.

"Metal to the pedal miners" guys Orion said the same exact thing Elita started the film with when he S A V E D H E R. OMG. I'm at a loss of words.

Also I dunno what he was talking about though, she is AMAZING at pep talks.

Kay I’ve already said a lot and haven’t mentioned everything else. Here’s a speedrun of it:

Airachnid was perfect. I swear Ironhide was in every scene with a background character. Sunstreaker is back. How dare they put Blurr in a race and he never even made the leaderboard (to my knowledge). Arcee is precious and OH MY GOD SENTINEL.

He needs his own post.

I walked into that theatre thinking I was going to hate him.

Nope. I couldn’t. Sentinel be fine. I couldn’t hate him. Not even for a second.

He said one word and BOOM, he’s mine. Everyone. Back. Off.

I almost screamed at Megatron for doing him like that.

Honestly if he came back to life and told me that this was all a misunderstanding, I would fall for it. I would fall for anything that face says. Damn he fine.

Obviously I have a lot to talk about. I haven’t even scratched the surface. I’ve been holding it in for a week and I suck at not accidentally spoiling things to friends when I get excited (you know who you are). But that’s kind of the basics. It’s a good movie and I have already watched it twice. Once with family and once with friends. I might go again (on cheap nights). I am willing to blow my nonexistent bank account on this movie. It was worth it.

[uncanny-tranny]

happy transexual thursday!!!!

I've been on HRT for 1 month exactly as of five hours ago!!!!

and while some things have moved faster than others, if I weight the expected change in body systems over time by grouping changes to tissue types, and compare that data to the actual changes recorded, the results are overall amazing.

I'll share four things- one is an outlier, and the other is the difference to the average expected change not accounting for the outlier, one is the rate of expected change compared to observed change WITH the outlier, and the final thing is what the outlier is.

first, the outlier: 10 years of expected progress in one month in one tissue group. (probably more actually. data got a bit silly here, because I knew a hormone condition I have could speed this up so I accounted for that. just... not enough accounting for it :3)

second, the rate at which I'm transitioning compared to expected changes (not counting the outlier): 15 times as fast as expected!

third, as above, but WITH the outlier: 25 times as fast as expected!!!!!

fourth, the outlier: Hip rotation and widening! Thought I wouldn't get much, or that it would take a few years, but a perfect storm of hormone conditions made my hips expand and rotate as much as a cis girl gets over 8 years of puberty

this transgirl is speedrunning transition, and that's with the lowest dose the clinic could give me to check for liver issues if those might pop up!

I actually really relate to this in the "opposite" way, like, it just felt so right for me, and honestly, that is the most meaningful thing I've gotten from hormones <<3