#probably not. and in all likelihood it will never be written

[victory-cookies]

I love the completely unfounded confidence I get in myself late at night. I’m convinced that now that I’m off school I’m gonna actually write my fucking book

[hypewinter]

Ok so here's the deal. I'm not gonna be able to upload ch 3 of Raising a Ghost. You see what happened was, I kinda maybe sorta......got sidetracked by a completely different story that has nothing to do with anything I've worked on in the past. Whoops. To make matters worse, I couldn't even finish that story because I got sick. Double whoops.

So to make up for that, I'll be posting little prompts and ideas throughout the day. Hope you enjoy!!

[afterglowkatie]

secret admirer | l.w.

leah williamson x reader | 1.4k | leah had been on the receiving end of your anonymous letters not having the courage to talk to her until you get caught out

ˏˋ°•*⁀arsenal/lioness!reader - a little leah fic bc mainly leah and alexia have been living rent free in my head all day today :') but yeah! also i work 10 hour days the rest of the week so a little something until i can not be too tired to write again!

‘Ooh, Leah’s got a secret admirer,’ Keira sang out, teasing Leah while they crowded around the bouquet of flowers and note that was left sitting in Leah’s cubby. Keira took the note from Leah’s hand reading it out loud, if any one was around they’d be able to listen in to the contents.

For the last few months Leah had been finding little notes of admiration left around in places that only she would be able to find. The notes started appearing around in places when she was anywhere with arsenal. At training, their home games and also their away games. At first she thought it might’ve been a supporter anonymously giving her support and admiration from afar. It could’ve looked like that especially with some of the shorter notes being pretty generic, ‘your laugh is my favourite sound’ and ‘your smile is pretty just like you’. 

Until the longer notes made their appearance, taking the place of the shorter notes. After a month of leaving the shorter notes around for Leah to find, she hadn’t figured out it was you which made you decide to be more brave. Well as brave as you could be hiding behind anonymous letters and gifts. Your letters got longer and more personal and in depth which made Leah clue in that it wasn’t a fan and the likelihood it was some crazed stalker was quite low. 

With how personal some of the things were and that she was still receiving flowers and notes even while on camp with England, Leah started considering that it was one of her teammates who Keira had deemed her secret admirer. Even if she was unsure of who was sending and writing her these notes, Leah still thought some of them were beautifully written and even gave her the comfort she needed especially after tough games.

‘I really have no idea who is leaving these for me. Could it be someone here?’ Leah voiced the thought she had been having for a little while now, that it was one of her teammates. They both pondered the thought, realising that it was probably the only reasonable explanation on how these letters always seemed to reach Leah no matter where she was.

‘Our next mission, finding out who your secret admirer is,’ Keira laughed, slightly wiggling her eyebrows, teasing Leah even more.

‘Our next mission is training,’ Leah rolled her eyes, shaking her head and gently pushing at her best friend.

Already out on the pitch you watched as the pair walked out joining the rest of the team before training started. Ever since you met Leah you had been infatuated with her. The way she was kind and helpful to you when you started at arsenal and when you got your first call up for the lionesses, it instantly drew you in. The only problem was that you had no idea how to properly talk to her. It wasn’t unknown that Leah can be intimidating, she definitely intimidated you. Whenever you could be around her within a group setting you were always there, even from slightly afar your feelings towards Leah continued to grow. 

It frustrated you how you didn’t even know how to befriend Leah, only being able to be around her whenever other girls from either team were there. At first you weren’t even going to leave her the letters, only writing them for yourself as a way to get your feelings out. Feeling like you would implode from how greatly you were feeling for Leah, luckily writing it out had helped you. Unlucky for you that one of the letters had slipped out and fallen in a place where Leah would find it. While you never wrote your name on any, all the letters were addressed to Leah so there was no mistaking that it was for her when she eventually found it. 

When you saw Leah holding up the coloured paper you knew you had used to write out your feelings, your heart started to race. Immediately trying to think of a way you could get far away from Leah just in case. But the small smile that ghosted her lips melted your heart a little. So you continued to leave more hoping that same smile would always make its appearance, wanting nothing more than to make sure Leah was happy. In some way you could still be in her life.

Nights before matches weren’t great for you, always ending up struggling to sleep from the build up of nerves. Eventually you’d be able to push the nerves away enough to be able to sleep but tonight proved to be the hardest you’ve faced since your first national camp. Finding yourself scribbling out a little note for Leah as a way to distract you from your nerves at the match the next day. 

Not wanting to keep the letter on you knowing it would be more risky with everyone on top of each other in the hotel and thinking everyone would be asleep by now you decided to deliver the letter. Sneaking out of your room and down the hallway towards the room you knew Leah was staying in, you made sure to be quiet enough so no one would wake up and find you out in the hallway at this time knowing you couldn’t make up a lie to save your life.

Though you didn’t account for Leah to still be awake having gotten lost in all different kinds of puzzle games on her phone. You shuffled around a little outside the door to her room contemplating whether you should actually slide the letter underneath the door or throw it out and make your way back to your own room. 

Leah had heard some noises outside the door in the hallway and had gotten up to check it out, to see if it was any of her teammates needing help. She was about to open the door when she saw the familiar coloured paper and knew it was another letter. You were still standing outside the door lost in your thoughts, wishing you had more courage to actually talk to Leah, when you suddenly came face-to-face with the girl that clouded your thoughts. Leah’s face matching the same surprise and shock as your own.

‘You were the one who wrote me all these letters?’ Leah was the first on to break the silence between the two of you, quickly stepping out into the hallway beside you and quietly shutting the door, ‘Why didn’t you just come talk to me?’ 

Leah’s eyebrows furrowed a little. While she had caught your interest, little did you know that you had caught Leah’s interest. She found the way you could instantly light up the room and change a sullen atmosphere into a lighter more joyful one quite endearing. Always wanting to get to know you and talk to you more but she could never seem to get you alone, always with a group of people whenever the two of you were around each other. Leah always watched you from afar, she’d become quite proud of the footballer you’d become since she first met you. After a tough match she’d always be looking around wanting to catch a glimpse of the smile you’d always be wearing to try and cheer everyone up. Leah was relieved knowing you had been the one writing her the letters.

‘I think I practised talking to you and asking you out a couple hundred times in the mirror,’ You sighed out, softly laughing at how ridiculous you felt sharing this with Leah. But she’d already read so many letters from you so you might as well confess everything now, ‘But anonymous notes was all the courage I could muster,’ You whispered out, looking around a little fidgeting with your fingers.

‘You practised asking me out? On yourself?’ Hearing the amusement in Leah’s voice, you looked up seeing her slightly smirking at you.

‘Of course that’s what you focused on,’ You shook your head, a small smile starting to creep it’s way onto your face when it suddenly dropped and you took a deep breath, ‘Well Le, now you know that it’s me…would you want to go out with me some time?’ You raised your eyebrow in question, your eyes glimmering with hope that Leah would agree, hoping that maybe she felt the same way.

‘Hm let me see,’ Leah pulled a fake thinking face, but it made your heart deflate not realising she was setting you up and just messing around with you. Leah saw your face drop and instantly reached for your hands, interlocking your fingers with hers while she smiled softly at you, ‘Oh stop the frown, I’d love to go on a date with you,’ 

[descendant-of-truth]

Ohhh this scene. This one's a doozy

Nine is right to call this out about Sonic, of course. While he's definitely grown since the start of the show, he's never really been able to move past his tunnel vision and tendency to project onto the others.

He never thought to ask Nine what he wanted not because he doesn't care, but because he didn't think he needed to. He inherently assumes that the people he's working with are on the same page as him until told otherwise - in fact, it wasn't too long ago that he was similarly thrown off by Shadow in that very room.

(Love Shadow being used as a sort of "test run" for these kinds of conflicts by the way)

But here's the thing. While it's true that Sonic didn't really think about what Nine wanted and just assumed they were going to stick together no matter what... the same is true of Nine.

Look at how confused Nine looks when Sonic talks about coming back to Green Hill and restoring it:

Nine didn't ask what Sonic was wanting to do by repairing the Prism because he thought it was obvious that they were going back to the Grim together. I don't think it occurred to him that fixing Green Hill was even an option, or at least not one that he considered in favor of his original plans.

And just like Sonic, it's not that he only cares about himself - he went out of his way to engineer coconuts and (presumably) palm trees because he knew how much Sonic missed them. It was really sweet!

But, in what's becoming a pattern in this show, he doesn't understand why those trees matter to Sonic. They're not just cool plants, they're a reminder of home. And as Sonic aptly puts it at the start of the show, home is where your friends are.

I love that the conflict here is that both of them were convinced they knew what the other person wanted/would be okay with, because they think it'll naturally be the same thing they want, and then were both completely unprepared to handle a conflict of interest. It feels so natural and makes perfect sense with how they've been written up to this point.

But see, while I think it's pretty clear that Sonic and Nine fell into the exact same communication trap, I think it's going to take longer for Nine to realize his own fault in any of this.

Sonic spent the entire second half of that conversation looking devastated, and he's made it clear throughout the show that he's quick to feel remorse when he realizes he's hurt someone. In all likelihood, he's going to put all of the blame for that argument on himself, decide that Nine was right about everything, and leave it at that.

Nine, likewise, doesn't strike me as a particularly self-reflective type. He'd probably try to justify not needing Sonic to himself before anything else, and with that in mind, who else is there to make him see the situation with more nuance?

If I had to pick, I'd guess Shadow - our resident "smacking people in the face with their own flaws" extraordinaire.

Why would he bother with any sort of mediating between the two? Well, the funniest reason would be that he finds Sonic's self-pitying and Nine's self-righteousness equally annoying, but I'm inclined to assume any sort of confrontation between him and Nine would be a little more dramatic than that. (He might still use that reasoning as justification though)

Anyway I gotta cut this post short before I go too far into speculation territory or else I'll be here for another hour and this took long enough to write as is, case in point I love me a well-written and believable conflict

[drferox]

@scarfanon said: Can you give us some tips on how to recognize when a channel's stories and narration are AI-generated, so as to better avoid them? I increasingly believe one channel that I've been following for years has gotten into this, but I don't know for certain.

It’s kind of hard, because while some narrations are definitely human, picking the difference between a novice writer or someone within less experience and something AI generated is harder. Features can increase the probability of a narration being one or the other, but there are no guarantees.

These are some of the guidelines I use, or things that make me suspicious of AI.

Features that increase the likelihood of a story being written by a human:

Has an authors name/credit

Is part of a series or has recurring characters

Has a theme, or a core message. Not just aesthetics.

Features that make me think the fiction is AI generated:

Story is about something trendy

Seems to have a lot of aesthetics, has the vibe, but doesn’t have the point

Ends up feeling like a detail is missing

Leaves you wondering why you bothered

Now it’s entirely possible that a novice human writer, especially one that’s exposed to a lot of AI writing instead of good human authors might end up mimicking an AI style. But these are just guidelines for suspicion.

For the voices, I think they’re more likely to be human if:

There is a video clip of them talking at any point

They change their tone and way of speaking for different characters

They’re at they speak is different in the ‘please subscribe’ tagline at the end of the video

And I become suspicious of AI if:

There doesn’t seem to be much variation in the tone or pace (though this is far from a good indication

They get common brand names or proper nouns wrong. Eg Nike, Dalek, Klingon

They get words with a non-English origin wrong, eg vague, Eloise

The tone doesn’t match what’s happening in the story

They use the same speaking voice for wildly different characters.

Now admittedly a human narrator could have all those faults, but when they have a lot of them, consistently, I start to get suspicious.

I’m never 100% certain, but too many features out of place start to feel uncanny so they are the kind of things I look for.

[inkpot909]

Their Favorite Part of You Headcanons (Jotaro Kujo, Noriaki Kakyoin)

↳ Reader is written as gender neutral. It’s stated that the Reader goes along with the crusaders on their trip to Egypt (+takes place after the journey as well). Everyone lives AU.

A/n: Wow, I actually posted something! Jokes aside, this summer has been rough so I’ve been trying to take it easy when I can. I missed writing, though, and hope y’all enjoy.

Warning(s): Slightly suggestive content.

Jotaro Kujo

He appreciates your eyes best.

Considering the apparent intimacy that results from direct eye contact, it makes the question an easy one to answer.

In fact, it’s highly probable your eyes were what he first noticed about you upon the initial meeting. Whether he has to bend his neck downward or you manage to stand at eye-level, it’s a moment he’s likely replayed over and over in his mind.

Another reason behind this choice is also a simple one (If you ask Jotaro, at least).

He didn’t fall easy and not at all for shallow reasons. Many of his classmates throughout high school would fuss over him seemingly due to his outwardly appearance and reputation. Because he was the “popular guy to like,” a diverse range of people were noticeably into him.

And taking into account how much he loathed a particular group of girls that would follow him around constantly, his perspective on love doesn’t tolerate anything he would deem shallow.

So, in short, what he cherishes most about you tends to be very personal to who you are.

It also plays into his communication preferences. Unsurprisingly, he tends to stare at you…. a lot.

It was definitely awkward in the early stages of your platonic-at-the-time relationship.

Throughout the duration of the journey to Egypt, you’d lost count of the times you’d stand face-to-face without a single word being exchanged. He didn’t ever wince or turn away, and you fondly recall the sheer intensity of those moments having kept you perfectly still.

Understanding Jotaro better as an individual- as well as how he feels about you -progressed his stares into something you find to be heartwarming. Just catching him in the act makes your heart leap, and your mind reels with wonder over what’s going through his head.

A little over a year after the aforementioned trip, and a relationship forms. It’s by then that he finds himself okay with getting lost in your lovely irises.

Your light giggle when you finally meet his gaze, flustered and gentle… it’s worth it. He always catches the moment your smile reaches your eyes, slightly creased by upturned lips. It’s a breathtaking sight, having twice now caused a cigarette to fall from his mouth while watching in awe.

His knack for nonverbal communication is pretty much universally understood by the few especially close to him. However, when it comes to you specifically, it reveals a rather bashful approach to the relationship that you might not have expected. It makes sense, as the likelihood of you being his first love is... more accurately labeled a certainty.

Jotaro can be observant after forming a connection with someone. When it comes to you, this is definitely the case. Any excuse to look at you is fine in his book.

However, it’s been long-established that he’s not exactly chatty, so he responds best to reactions he can see with his own two eyes. And it’s in the depth of your pupils that he finds doing so the simplest (If not simple, it’s at least selfish given his own bias).

The main aspect of this type of communication involves him looking at you intensely while his body language makes the tiniest adjustments in order to voice whatever he’s thinking.

For example, him holding out his palm to you, as his eyes cling to your person, is his way of asking you to hold his hand. He trusts that you know him well enough to get the point. And while you work on decoding his own subtle actions, his gaze never once pulls away from yours.

He simply cannot help it; there’s really something special about your eyes. He searches for your gaze constantly, and lingers for as long as he possibly can. It’s as if he’s always seeking your approval, reaction, and attention.

Now, as the relationship turns serious, he prefers to keep his eyes locked on you whenever he can. Once the two of you start becoming intimate, it’s quickly apparent he likes positions where he can keep his face close to your own. Or at the very least, hold eye contact.

Jotaro’s shockingly passionate, holding your hand in his own while he directs his hips accordingly. Lips slightly parted and gaze locked onto yours without fault. The emotion radiating from him is nothing short of immovable devotion.

Noriaki Kakyoin

Asking him this question yourself garners a flushed appearance and a hasty answer. He’ll stutter, telling you it’s your voice that he likes best. From the way it’s delivered you wouldn’t be able to tell if he’s practiced his response in advance or simply grasping at straws. Still, it’s an adorable sight and your quite pleased with his reply. Seeing your reaction, Kakyoin would feel a hint of shame.

Because he would be lying though his teeth.

He wouldn’t dare admit it initially, least of all to you, but he loves the sight of your legs.

Perhaps you tend to have them exposed. If that’s the case, he’s ashamed that he noticed such a thing so early on. A lump made its home in his throat that day, halting his words and making his mind run wild.

Or alternatively, you may mainly keep them hidden. Whatever it was that first prompted you revealing your bare legs- a couple hours at a hotel pool possibly -he undoubtedly finds himself sneaking more glances in your direction than usual.

It’s going to take him a bit to mentally process this.

Even in it’s more innocent connotations, he cannot help growing flustered. He just can’t help but find it a bit risqué. Although not exactly self-prescribed, despite his occasional arrogance, Kakyoin is certainly the gentleman type. Far from the kind of guy to be caught eyeing up someone’s legs in any shape or form.

That being said, the closer you become, the more difficult avoiding it gets. He focuses so much of his energy on not even glancing at your legs that he does, in fact, notice them quite often.

It doesn’t help being stuck in a car for hours on end right next to you. Thighs brushed against one another by sheer circumstance. It didn’t matter how many times it occurred throughout the trip to Egypt, he would think about it afterwards each time.

And it took only one sly comment from Polnareff or Mr. Joestar to prompt a myriad of fierce denials from the redhead. They’d egg him on, speaking a bit too loudly about how he’s “checking you out.” His cheeks would turn fiercely pink while rushing out a defense, which did not do much to help his case.

Eventually, the journey reaches its end. The group inevitably dissolves, but the two of you remain very close after the fact.

By then, your feelings for one another are certainly apparent. It’s hard for you to deny it when the excuse of looming danger is no longer present, and in turn he couldn’t imagine any other reason as to why you clung so close to him during his recovery period.

And even after becoming an official couple, understanding how to express his affection is met with bashfulness and hesitancy. If you’re inexperienced like him, it’ll likely be comforting for you. If you aren’t, it probably comes off as endearing.

Yes, you both have explicitly admitted to each other how you feel. Will Kakyoin still keep himself from eyeing you in any way? Absolutely.

A discussion will likely need to be had between the both of you before he loosens up a bit. A clear omission that you like him looking at you will help put his mind at ease (Man’s so smitten he feels guilty noticing that your beautiful god bless him).

Once he grows used to the relationship and starts showing just how touch-starved he is, the favoritism he holds for your legs finally becomes clear to you.

He’ll snuggle between your legs while he games, perfectly content within your hold. Even if you fall asleep, he doesn’t necessarily mind.

A lot of the clothes he buys for you leaves your legs exposed. The expression of awe he has whenever you wear something he’s bought is special to that occasion only. A strange mix of adoration and pride.

You also start catching him on his stares. Teasing him over it is a sure way for you earn a blush, as well as a weak comeback. However, the smile adorning his features exposes fondness. Only you’re allowed to say anything, though.

As intimacy blooms, he gladly indulges himself more. It strengthens his confidence in his actions, and turns the tides. Moving frustratingly slow, he glances up at you after leaving an array of kisses and bites up your inner thighs. All while he’s mumbling sweet nothings, pure honey oozing from his hushed tone.

Of course, he adores everything about you. But there’s a certain vigor in his actions when he continues moving upward that’s hard to miss.

[always-andromeda]

⋆⁺. ❅ 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐤𝐞𝐞𝐩 𝐦𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐦 ❅ .⁺⋆

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 ⟡ Din Djarin x F!Reader

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 ⟡ 1051

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 ⟡ A trip to Kashyyyk to observe Life Day leads to Din reevaluating the nature of his relationship with you.

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 ⟡ Merry Christmas Eve, Liv (@galaxyedging)!! I'm your Secret Santa for the @pedrostories Secret Santa event!! I've only written for Din once before but I wanted to challenge myself a little and try to write something soft and fluffy from his perspective since he's your favorite. I hope my little offering fills you with the warm and fuzzies this holiday. Sending you a massive hug along with this too. Please take care of yourself!!

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 ⟡ no smut, all fluff but please, mdni. subtle friends to lovers. terrible regurgitations of Life Day lore (pls do not crucify me for my portrayal of Star Wars lore I promise I am trying my best thanksss <3). canon divergence (Din, reader, and Grogu are literally just a happy family and nothing bad has happened to them <3).

The dense forest of Kashyyyk had been a destination on your bucket list for quite some time. Din, personally, felt impartial about the Wookie planet. But, somehow, in all of yours and his years of traveling the galaxy neither of you had never found a reason to make it there. At least not until one of Din’s guild contacts gave word there was work on the planet. All it took was some less than dignifying begging on your part to convince Din to extend your stay into the holiday season. After all, it was hard for even Din to argue with the betterment of Grogu’s cultural knowledge.

The likelihood that the kid would truly learn something from the event was low. Maybe he was fond of that excited sparkle in your eyes when he finally caved. And dank farrik, that look had his skin tingling with an electric pulse underneath his beskar plates. He was grateful he couldn’t properly feel your touch when you grabbed his hand with your own and thanked him profusely. If he had, he probably would’ve caught fire.

You’d worked with him for years. What had begun as a tentative partnership had evolved into something close to companionship; at least as close to companionship as a nameless, faceless man like him could get.

It helped that the kid adored you. You were almost always talking to or playing with him until he exhausted himself. Then you’d hum and rock him to sleep before laying him in his pod. Yeah…Grogu would’ve been distraught if you’d decided it was time to part ways.

Perhaps that’s why Din had given in.

Maker only knew that most others would’ve given up on trying to get to know long ago. There was only so much of himself left to offer with how much he had given to his creed and then his son. There wasn’t even much less for himself to hold onto. Yet you still managed to find something to grasp. You managed to trust him simply by the tone of his modulated voice. You’d found something in the Mandalorian’s imposing image that made you stay.

At the end of the day, choosing to stay a little while longer in Kashyyyk was the easiest option. It became even easier on the day you all chose to journey to the Tree of Life. The path had primarily been tread by the Wookies. However, in the years following the Empire’s fall from power, interest in the holiday had been steadily growing in the galaxy at large. While there were a handful of other beings you most likely could’ve actually spoken to, you seemed far more interested in the scenery.

Once your party had settled near the Tree of Life’s center, Din saw how both you and the child drank everything in. Crystalline orbs that glowed from the trees and reflected in Grogu’s massive eyes as he peered over the lip of his pod. More than once he attempted to reach for one of the traditional crimson robes that many of the Wookies wore. Din had tried to nip that in the bud with a stern no touching to him.

But, like everywhere you three went, Grogu’s pod was eventually crowded by all manner of children who’d never seen such a creature as him and he was all too willing to soak up the attention. Soon his grabby hands were clasping the fingers of half a dozen alien children cooing over him.

Din was moments away from shooing them away when you spoke up. “Give him some space, kids. We don’t want to overwhelm him, okay?”

They reluctantly backed up. You glanced at Din to remark, “Hopefully he doesn’t end up falling asleep before the main ceremony. I’d hate for him to miss it”

“If he does, we could just come back next year,” Din replied dryly.

You chuckled. “Next year? You want to make this a tradition now, huh?”

“That’s what this whole thing is about, isn’t it? Tradition…togetherness…trees…?”

“Sort of. Mostly it’s about family. It’s about coming together in harmony with one another. Being here with you both just made sense to me.”

Din tried to veil the intrigue in his voice. “Made sense?”

“Well…of course.” You played with your fingers as you seemed to think before explaining, “We’ve been working together for a while. And with Grogu…that makes us a family of sorts, don’t you think?”

Din couldn’t have formulated an answer even if he tried. 

“Mando, look!” you exclaimed as the main event began. Your eyes lit up in time with the twinkling orbs nestled among the Tree of Life’s branches. The throaty voices of the Wookie choir resonated through the forest. But amongst all the people exchanging gifts, the joyous music, and the otherworldly lights, the only thing Din could focus on was your fingers beginning to dance with his own.

He bet they were cold. And he bet that with one swift movement he could easily engulf yours with his own gloved hand and warm it up immediately. In one move he could let you know there was something more than the presence of the child cementing his bond with you. 

Din pulled his hand back and for a moment he felt your own recoil in what must’ve been embarrassment. He quickly remedied your panic and watched as you looked up at him. He didn’t blame you for the split second look of confusion on your face. But he reveled in it when your brow went soft and your lips pursed upon feeling his bare skin for the first time.

He could hardly believe that the only thing keeping him from experiencing this the whole time was a simple, silly glove. Your fingers laced between his like this was routine. Not practiced but still comfortable all the same.  In time you quietly brought his hand to your lips and pressed a chaste kiss to one of his knuckles. Knuckles that rarely saw anything but the inside of those damned gloves were now being blessed by the warmth of your soft lips. It was so soft, so utterly wordless and unprecedented that it felt like your own personal gift to him. And out of all the important things Life Day was said to mean…this was it for him. Warmth.

[kiwiana-writes]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

A big ol' fuck you to @rmd-writes for the tag xoxo

1. How many works do you have an AO3? Lol. Lmao even. 289.

2. What's your total AO3 word count? 914,620 on AO3, but that includes co-writes as well as things I've podficced where the fic and pod are in the same work. My actual personally-written wordcount, per my Batshit Spreadsheet, is 771,819.

3. What fandoms do you write for? Mostly RWRB these days, though most of my back catalogue is Schitt's Creek. Also The Pairing and various other things scattered about.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Kinda think that I might be his type aka Alex and Bea fake date coming in at the top spot, which will never not bewilder me. Don't get me wrong, it's a lovely fic!! But I am always surprised that it was a few hundred more kudos than:

With so much of my heart (that none is left to protest), the Much Ado actors AU. My magnum opus, my beloved.

We were supposed to find this - baby's first soulmate AU and my first RWRB fic. The brainrot really took hold with this one lmao.

All the Lonely Starbucks Lovers, in which Henry takes 'open mouth insert foot' to a whole new level.

Warm like the glow that you feel head to toe, the age gap fic with older Senator Alex and younger Prince Henry. This is probably the only one in my top five that really surprises me, considering age gaps are... divisive.

5. Do you respond to comments? Always always always.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? I mean I did write that one MCD fic in Schitt's Creek, though I maintain the other five parts in that 5+1 are in fact angstier than the MCD ending.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Uhhhhhhh, the rest? The Doylist answer is any of my fics where the HEA is literally forever rather than 'till death do us part'; so, the Schitt's Creek afterlife AU and the RWRB zombie!Alex AU. (Is that all? Am I forgetting one?)

8. Do you get hate on fics? Yeah, sometimes. Weirdly, more through tumblr anons than on the fics themselves? A lot of them I just delete, sometimes I'll give them a bit of a public scolding etc. Frankly at this point if you come into my ask box to be a cunt on anon I'm going to assume you have a public humiliation kink and will indulge you accordingly.

9. Do you write smut? Who's to say.

10. Do you write crossovers? I'm more inclined towards a fusion than a crossover (love a good media fusion) but I did write a short RWRB/The Pairing crossover for VoiceTeam.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not to my knowledge.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Nope. Someone did ask recently, so we'll see!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? HEAPS. @ships-to-sail is an ongoing collaborator, but I also did a bunch of "each write a chapter" type collabs in Schitt's Creek. Currently co-writing something truly fucking incredible with @indestructibleheart.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? IDK if it's a WIP by the strictest definition, but every day the likelihood of the SC kink!verse series being completed slips further away lol.

16. What are your writing strengths? Rae, you're the worst.

Smut, I guess? Giving people new kinks, apparently. Character voice. Also a very specific type of world-building where I explain nothing because the characters already live in that world and let y'all infer how it works, which came up a LOT on one of this year's Kinktober fics in particular and led to my spouse saying "okay so you're basically the Brennan Lee Mulligan of tree fucking", which is sure not a sentence I expected to ever be directed towards me, but here we are.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Anything original, apparently. Good thing I didn't quit my job to be a writer or anything OH WAIT.

(In all seriousness, though, I am genuinely shit at, like, plotting. And action sequences.)

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? If it makes sense for the character, sure! I'm enlisting someone who speaks it for anything more complicated than, like, a pet name - I've seen what Google Translate tries to spit out for my second language and therefore don't trust it lmao.

19. First fandom you wrote for? terf queen mcgee's property.

20. Favourite fics you've written? The RWRB fic specifically based on the episode The Husbands of River Song from Doctor Who. Hands down the best thing I've ever written.

I also fucking LOVED the Much Ado actor AU. My love letter to Shakespeare and theatre and queer joy.

-

Tagging @blueeyedgrlwrites @cactusdragon517 @cricketnationrise @firenati0n @getmehighonmagic

@hgejfmw-hgejhsf @indestructibleheart @inexplicablymine @notspecialbabe @orchidscript

@piratefalls @sherryvalli @sparklepocalypse @stereopticons @whimsymanaged and, as always, anyone who wants to play! 

[emmitaaa4]

Addressing some fandom BS inconsistencies

Gwyn was shadow mommy, Az was shadow daddy, they were gonna have shadow babies with her extra super pliable bones.

I audibly chocked when I read this @nikethestatue (btw everything said in this post was on point). No but seriously this is how they sound, too many of them insisting that there is nothing wrong with basing the likelihood of a ship on who has the more suitable uterus to be with a man... cause supposedly they're just picking up on the hints SJM wrote for them? She likes babies for HEAs so ofc children are the end all be all of a relationship, plus there's absolutely no way that she could ever write an adoption plot SJM is literally adopted and has done it in other series. Selective reading strikes again.

A minimum amount of critical thinking would tell you that 1) the infamous *magical uterus change* scene was about nessian (& feysand), not about any ship; 2) if SJM had written Nesta changing Elain's uterus, it would have given too much away, not to mention 3) how disturbing/violating it would have been for Nesta to change her sister's reproductive anatomy WITHOUT HER CONSENT?! None of it makes sense narratively; my girl Nes would never, especially given the trauma they both suffered from having their bodily autonomy--and so much more--ripped away by the Cauldron.

This argument is so trivialized that I see it every other day on reddit/tiktok/*insert media app*, and yet elriels are the toxic side of the fandom? The ones whom people are allowed to insult, to ridicule for theories all made in good fun, the women that are villainized over a difference of opinion? Don't get me wrong, there's assholes on both sides and people keep calling one another variations of delulu (and the nastier personal attacks). But by painting this fandom-wide villain there is such a lack of accountability for the plethora of harmful talking points spread by other portions of the fandom. (I've been silently reading the anti-elain & anti-elriel tags for like a year, and I'm on tiktok. Yes, I have self-destructive tendencies).

Anyways.

I never understood either how people ever actually thought (or well still think) that gwynriel would happen BEFORE elucien?? It makes no sense logically, narratively, or in terms of characterization & the arc she's set up for Elain, Azriel, and Lucien. Yet it took one controversial bonus chapter for people to decenter Elain in her own story, that is make her choice of romantic partner--which SJM spent 3+ books setting up--Azriel's. It took one bonus chapter that soo many readers are still unaware of, to brush Elain off as a "sexual object" Az is using to distract himself until his therapist-extraordinaire Gwyn comes in and heals him all up. Because ofc she will: she's badass and not the "passive and weak and boring" Eplain (aka "Plant" or "brain dead gardener"), she fits the YA archetype of the spunky warrior-girl so she can handle his darkness, and SJM supposedly spent time fleshing her out because she wrote her as a LI for Azriel; she's made for him, she is what he needs to grow (I actually enjoyed Gwyn's character btw, just pointing out how silly it all sounds). “Next book is a love triangle between Elain/Az/Gwyn” “Elain will turn evil or is secretly evil”. So you're telling me that SJM would pit Elain & Gwyn against each other in a love triangle over a man... all because of a necklace that was not even mentioned once in the actual books? Please, let's be logical for a second.

All this because instead of reading the bonus chapter in the context of the books, some people are reading the books in the context of the bonus chapter. Which now that I think of it is probably why so many people mischaracterize Az the way they do--because yes we know enough of his character to know half of the stuff the fandom diagnoses him with is questionable. Azriel? Entitled incel x fuckboy hybrid (gotta be the first of his kind, minute slay ig)? Interesting tell me more. No joke I saw a semi-popular post on here where a gwynriel said they read the bonus WITHOUT HAVING READ ANY OF THE BOOKS. I'm sorry, ship wars are silly and believe it or not idc who ppl ship, but it makes it hard to take some of the things they say seriously.

All this to say that the fandom isn't even debating the right thing. If you consider everything SJM has said in her interviews:

(she's been planting seeds for Nesta & Elain's book since acomaf; she knows who she is writing the first 2 books about + is keeping things open for the 3rd one--with 5 different ship options--which automatically rules out "Elain will close the series"; she said she's doing research for Elain's book in the ACOFAS bonus & there's seeds for future bookS in acofas; all she said recently about her beloved *heroines* and the themes of fate/true love/choice she finds *very* interesting & wants to discuss)

and if you also consider all she's written in the actual books (elain's characterization + the overarching plot in general & how she fits into it), then it's pretty evident that Elain's book is next.

The question then would be who is the MMC / 2nd PoV in her book, aka would acotar 5 be an elucien or an elriel story? Because logically, gwynriel was always a consequence of elucien. I honestly do not understand how people don't see that.

Oh and they always think they're gagging elriels with the "obviously Azriel is the next MC" as if elriels aren't saying the same thing? And we're the ones twisting info and not making sense. It's just funny at this point.

---sidenote: I realize that this post generalizes some things, and I just wanted to say that I have interacted with lovely eluciens / people on either side of this headache of a ship war. My hard limit is Elain haters though... back off I say 🤺 BACK OFF 🤺

---sidenote 2: I would have written this as a reblog except im not entirely sure how tumblr works and I get no visibility from them rip.

[b4si1wh0]

From what I can tell, I can classify the mysteries so far into 5 main mysteries:

The Mrs Flood Mystery

The Susan Twist Mystery

The Mystery of The One Who Waits

The Mystery of Ruby Sunday’s Mother(??) Parent

The Mystery of Ruby Sunday

And here are my thoughts and theories on each of them (as well as fourth-wall breaks, and theories I do not like):

Mrs Flood:

She is Susan. I believe that ‘Susan’ Twist is a red herring, and Susan deserves her return. The fact that Ruby mentioned that she would be living in her time makes me even more sure, especially considering Ruby’s tendency to make things ‘happen’ - Strictly, Star Trek - more on that later.

She is River Song. A huge jump in likelihood, because I do believe her story is over, but you never know, and I don’t think I would be complaining about her return particularly. We don’t know Mrs Flood’s first name, which might be for a reason. Melody Pond, River Song and then xxxx Flood.

She is the One Who Waits. I’m going to probably say this about everyone but… idk what else to say. sHe’S tHe RaNi!!!11!!

Susan Twist:

She is the One Who Waits/part of the Pantheon of Gods. It just seems likely.

She is Ruby/Ruby’s mother. Seems the least likely, but in that case it would be a situation of ‘watching over’ Ruby in a way, but Susan Twist looks nothing like Ruby, so very unlikely.

She is no one/a spy. This works well for my first point regarding Ruby’s parent, but I think she might be a spy for The Trickster to keep an eye on the Doctor/Ruby. They could also be the same thing as the ‘Bad Wolf’, ‘Torchwood’ and ‘Vote Saxon’ - they don’t make sense until the finale, she might not make sense until the finale.

The One Who Waits:

Obviously one of the pantheon of Gods - I do believe the most powerful.

Probably Ruby’s mother, or someone related to Ruby.

We don’t know who they are yet. Some new guy. Hoping any one of these.

Ruby’s Parent:

THE TRICKSTER FROM THE SARAH JANE ADVENTURES! The hood and cloak are the same, the desolate London is so similar and the theme when Maria has The Trickster’s box in her bed and when Ruby was hoisted into the air is the same - please just search on youtube, it will probably be there. Plus, The Trickster would work well with the Pantheon of Gods - the Gods of CHAOS - what The Trickster thrives on.

A powerful being from the Gods of Chaos - an evil thing, the One Who Waits.

Someone the Doctor may recognise - though I doubt it somehow.

Ruby:

The daughter of one of the Gods of Chaos - you cannot deny her powers, in terms of the snow, mentioning things and then they exist - she mentions the Butterfly Effect- it happens. She mentions Star Trek in Space Babies, and the crew are dressed in uniforms eerily similar to the Star Trek ones. She mentions Strictly - who come but Johannes and Shirley from Strictly.

A supernatural entity - like a changeling, or something like that. The DNA scan said she was human, but it was only 70% done - that might be foreshadowing something - in terms that she is not human. In The Wild Blue Yonder, The Doctor let superstition come in - maybe he also let Ruby in.

A bad guy. One of the Gods of Chaos, the One Who Waits. Getting close to The Doctor all this time… maybe this won’t even be revealed until series 15. That would be great in my opinion honestly!

The last episode - ‘The Legend of Ruby Sunday’ makes me believe that she is older than she is. It is not the story, it is the legend - the Google definition being ‘a traditional story sometimes popularly regarded as historical but not authenticated. Not a word being used for a 19-year-old girl from Manchester, methinks.

Fourth-wall breaks: The Legend of Ruby Sunday seems to be based on a TV show - now we get to the ‘Doctor Who’ is a TV show in ‘Doctor Who’ - e.g. The Doctor can hear the non-diegetic music. I think this is a great idea. (I have written a fan-fiction about this 2 years ago hehe).

I DO NOT think these theories are true: 

The Doctor is Ruby’s parent. Nope. Too obvious, lazy and just plain weird.

Ruby is Ruby’s parent?? Weird and impossible. Very very timey-wimey.

The Master is returning - I don’t think they are this series - keep in mind that we only last saw them 6 episodes as of now (after Boom - not counting The Tooth).

THANK YOU READING IF YOU’VE READ ALL OF THIS!!!

[danieyells]

I have a memory span of a goldfish so I probably forget if someone has written about something related to this topic or not... but excluding Taiga who directly mentioned the topic to us, why does it seem that only Tohma and Alan are the only ones shown so far to know/talk about the existence of the spy and actively searching for them? I can only theorize that they were only being made aware of the spy's existence because something happened in Vagastrom that was caused by an unknown party and it probably directly/indirectly worsen the situation during The Clash... but it still made me curious why they were never seen communicating with ghouls from other houses about the spy even in subtle/discreet manner (either because they don't want to alert the spy or still aren't sure where the spy came from...?) and why none of the other ghouls seem to notice the oddity/draw their own conclusion and do their own investigation? (unless it is just... never being shown yet to us on-screen so we're left to believe that only Tohma and Alan and Taiga are the ones who know about the spy hjhdjdjdjdjdjfkl)

There's also this question about what makes Tohma and Alan trust each other/believe that neither of them are the spy himself... but I'm not ready to (over)think about this question so I will just believe that being a Vagastrom and (probably) forging their friendship through fistfights has created unbreakable bonds between them that can't easily be destroyed by mere existence of an unknown enemy 💪

So far we haven't seen anybody else talking about the spy, no! To be fair we haven't really found out who they would be spying for. . .they're trying to defame the ghouls as a whole but they're one of the ghouls themselves. . .to be fair we've only seen so many conversations between the ghouls without the PC present--and most of them seem concerned about their personal lives and missions more than any sort of greater plans.

It makes sense for Tohma--he has big plans that involve changing the Institute. Of course he's aware of the spy. And Alan is someone he probably trusts more than anyone. Alan is blunt and honest and straightforward--he couldn't run an operation intended to damage the reputations of the ghouls or be a spy or anything, he's just not built for it as a person--which also means he's vulnerable, I think. So he needs him to be aware for his own safety. And like you said, for characters like them I think a bond forged with bare fists is a bond that can't be broken lmao. He can trust Alan not to talk, even if he can't trust him not to let on that he knows something. But also Alan's reputation is already a mess. The likelihood that the spy would get too close to him feels slim to none to me. Just. Too big and obvious of a guy overall.

Taiga has his possibly stigma related Awareness--so if he just. . .knows, that also makes sense. He even says "do you wanna know who it is or keep letting them fool you" which tells me that he already knows and he's just not telling. He doesn't have to look for the spy, he's waiting to see what happens. He's looking out for himself and Romeo. Maybe the pc and Ritsu now too.

Also I feel like Tohma's interactions with Haku and Rui are supposed to be implicit of the spy situation, especially when Leo says someone(most likely Alan and Tohma?) are meeting near the "gross forest"(Obscuary, probably.) and there's Rui who can obscure himself in the shadows and admits to keeping an eye on people. . . .

But I assume that Tohma doesn't trust others with it at the moment, not until he knows for sure who the spy is. And everyone else is far too busy running their houses and living their lives to notice whatever Tohma and Alan noticed(or they simply don't question it or they accept it because 'whatever, our reputations sre bad anyway, how much more damage could someone else do?' or 'we're graduating soon anyway' for the third years, and they're probably not nearly as reliable in Tohma's eyes? I mean think about who all the other second and third years and captains and vice captains are. Not really the most trustworthy bunch with a delicate situation, especially if it's possible that they could be connected to the spy.

I imagine we'll learn more whenever we get back to Vagastrom or Frostheim!! But I think the spy situation is gonna have to be addressed closer to learning about the Clash. And I feel like we haven't quite gotten there with everyone yet, so we're a ways off.

On the other hand, Ed has a home screen line to the effect of "the ghouls are rioting again? They're so energetic. Anyway i was watching a youtube video." and next chapter is Obscuary so. . . . . . . . . . .

[wakacreations]

Letters From Rolan (Anthology)

Your Ally :) Letter Unproperly Sent.

Word Count: 887

Summary:

After Lorroakan's demise, Rolan reflects on his new position as the Master of Ramazith's Tower.

[A letter written in cursive script.]

Dear Tav,

You know you terrify me tremendously. That is no understatement. I have validity to that fear. Who can stand against the great saviour of Baldur’s Gate? Someone except I, of course. Oh, who am I kidding this letter won't be sent anyways. Most of these letters will never go to them…

At night I am stuck wondering if there was something more when you came to my rescue, my family’s rescue. If I was any other tiefling or stranger you had come across, you would probably rush in to save them. I am left thinking truly I cannot help these thoughts wandering into my subconscious as of late. I sit in this tower. I now can call mine but could I do so in good consciousness? My “master”, well.. “former master”, what am I even saying that BASTARD. How could I not have chosen to stand my ground against him sooner! Why did your actions have to sway me to act? That is not a slight at you but a chastisement at myself. How can I run and be the “Master” of Ramazith’s Tower when the time came to prove myself. To stand up against him I felt hesitation.. fear even. How did I let myself get diluted into thinking it was the price to pay for being a master wizard's apprentice?

For a long time I thought that such a thing was necessary not just for my apprenticeship but just everyday life. For how much of my life, my existence had been a mix of luck and misfortune. Am I worthy to keep accepting these happenstances of luck, these “gifts” and these “talents”. I was casted aside at birth you know. I never told another soul, only my family knows that fact. If our mother didn't well their mother showed such hospitality, to commit to such a noble act I.. honestly don't know where I would be. There were some soldiers, Hellriders who took pity on me when I was only but a street urchin living in Elturel. Maybe I would join their ranks. I know such a statement seems like a jest. “Rolan?! Thee tiefling wizard who is prim and proper! Who wouldn't be caught dead smelling of the grove!?! That same Rolan???” I heard all types of heckling from those troglodytes to know that sounds outlandish. I was in my youth. What else could I say? My ambitions were always grand.

I try, you know. I try to be more than I am; some child beggar on the streets, a wretched Hellspawn, a refugee of a great historic tragedy, a victim of a bastard fraud who dares call themselves a “wizard”, and for me to be simply more than just a burden who was abandoned by birth. I don't blame her, my birth mother or my father or whomever left me at the orphanage in Baldur’s Gate. Well I find it hard sometimes to find a reason to love me too.

*tears stains appear on the parchment

Cal, Lia.. and my mother do carry my burden. I am forever grateful and owe them more than I am worth, more than I could ever repay. I have resigned myself to spending the rest of my existence to them. To provide, to protect, and to serve as their guardian in my mother's stead. I know they see me as their brother, sometimes their older brother when they get sentimental. Most of the time to settle their petty arguments. They are all I have known and happy to have only known. They are my family.

Honestly that is why I was so adamant to forgo any of your insistent meddling. I am surprised you still saved us when you did. Maybe you were more willing to save my siblings. I won't blame you if you were put off from saving I, time and time again. Even I would feel the displeasures of such a task. In the similar vein as to my family, I do owe you for my life and additionally more so for theirs. 

If time ever came and the likelihood would be astronomically improbable but I would rescue you, you know. Truly I would. If word was spread of you going amiss or in some unimaginable otherworldly danger you would find yourself in, I would seek you. Do anything within my power to save you from whatever peril that has befallen you. Not just because my debt would be paid to you. 

I… well. If nothing.. I am the Master of Ramazith's Tower of course. I will live up to and be the most powerful wizard in Baldur’s Gate. I have now acquired the resources necessary to acquire the title. After properly continuing my research and studies of course. There is plenty more I need to learn. There are many subjects of the weave I have yet to achieve mastery of.

If in any case you find yourself in need of help, anything at all the Master of Ramazith's Tower will answer you. I will surely and graciously assist you to the best of my abilities. It is only right for me to do so to the person who earned the title hero or do you prefer being called the great saviour of Baldur’s Gate?

-Rolan  (friend?)

The Master of Ramazith’s Tower

[bthump]

this has probably been asked here before but how likely do you think it is that the author actually truly intended for Griffith and guts relationship to be romantic? How likely do you think it is we’ll get a blatant confirmation (eg a confession of love beyond being friends or even a tragic kiss) and if it does happen do you think it’s likely we’ll get an explicit confirmation on both of their ends so we know the feeling is reciprocated (because I know guts feelings can be underestimated sometimes compared to griffiths). Likelihood as a percentage or on a scale from one to ten lol. I think it’s already pretty obvious enough for me to be satisfied whatever happens but it would be nice if there was an undeniable proof of mutual romantic love. because I think no matter what happens if it’s anything less than spelling it out word for word people would still make attempts to deny their feelings which is kind of sad to me. But I could be wrong of course and romance wasn’t intended by the author. Either way I want them to reveal their feelings for each other whether platonic or romantic.

I'm cynical, so I feel like the odds of something textually romantic happening are like, 2/10 at best. Might've gone up to 3/10 if Miura was stlil alive since it's getting more and more common to confirm gay subtext and that might've influenced him, but since it's being written now by someone determined to adhere to the plans Miura told him, whatever happens is frozen in amber circa Miura and Mori's last conversation, with no room to evolve.

That's all pretty much a moot point anyway because again, I think the odds were always gonna be pretty miniscule anyway.

That said, I think the odds that Miura intended the gay subtext are like 9.5/10 lol. I think the romantic undertones are almost certainly deliberate.

I guess I just don't think it necessarily follows that the point of the subtext was ever to eventually become text. I think it was probably there for a lot of potential other reasons: to add a sense of depth and complexity to their relationship; to add more chemistry; potentially to appeal to women; to suggest that their relationship had the potential for romance that will never be realized therefore making their relationship even more all-encompassing and adding to the tragedy; serving the theme of childhood trauma fucking up your relationships; etc.

Of course I'd be overjoyed if it was acknowledged eventually, and I think the story would ultimately be better for it, like I'm not gonna say it's ~deeper~ if it stays subtext lol. But I think that considering the main target audience for Berserk is horny straight dudes, and while it's getting more common it's still very rare to have textual gay romances between two leads, and almost unheard of in legacy media properties, I just don't think the odds are in griffguts' favour.

Oh, though I do want to add that I'd say the odds of getting an acknowledgement of intense feelings between them post-eclipse is very high. I don't think it'd likely be a romantic confession, but yeah I think it seems very likely that Griffith and Guts are going to acknowledge the intense emotional hold they still have over each other. And if that happens I'll be happy even if it's not textually romantic. I'm sure it'll at least be homoerotic enough for me lol.

Thanks for the ask!

[acourtofthought]

An Elriel on Tiktok: They're endgame! Mass had Elain wearing colbalt blue when she and Azriel met! It's obviously foreshadowing!

Me: Colbalt blue is also the color of Greysen's house, he was her fiance at the time, so it makes sense for her to be wearing the color of the man she was going to marry.

We can also look at this another way. Lucien, Elain's mate, and potential love interest is associated with warm colors like orange. Azriel and Greysen, Elain's former love and potential love interest, are both associated with colbalt blue. Now, if we look at Elain's experience with her first colbalt blue guy, Greysen, we see how it ended with her heartbroken. So, doesn't it kinda make sense to think that maybe SJM made Greysen associated with colbalt blue as a way to foreshadow her future relationship/potential relationship with Azriel?

Elain + clobalt blue guys = it doesn't work/probably won't work

I really love your take on it and I do think it's a more powerful statement that the two guys who are associated with cobalt rejected Elain and were written as being all wrong for her. Though to be honest, I am still surprised that the other side thinks what Elain was wearing in book 2 had anything to do with Az. Elain was in love with Graysen in book 2. The big reveal to all that, to Nesta and Cassian talking about how Elain deserved better (in the Wings and Embers bonus) was how Sarah shocked readers with the reveal of the Elain and Lucien mating bond by the end of the book. I highly doubt she wrote Elain as being in love with / engaged to Graysen, knowing she was going to drop the bomb of the Elucien bond, a shock to Lucien since he already thought he had a mate, while also knowing she was going to have Elain end up with Az. Especially when Az literally did not care that Elain was being put into the cauldron during the worst moment of her life. And in book 2 Mor and Az was heavily hinted at being a thing. It's fine that she changed her mind on them in book 3 but the way she wrote Mor and the way she wrote Mor / Az between books 2 and 3 is so vastly different it's shocking if someone didn't pick up on the likelihood of Moriel as endgame in book 2. All the buildup in book 2 was dedicated to Mor / Az and Nesta / Cassian and I mean actual buildup between the characters themselves. Not Feyre randomly thinking "oh my pretty sister and Rhys's good looking friend are so genetically beautiful together and the sum total of their interactions would be them spending time together not saying anything because they like the quiet." Especially when SF proves to us that Feyre doesn't actually know Elain all that well. Not when Feyre also predicted Nesta and Amren would be fast friends in ACOMAF but Amren did not turn out to be Nesta's found family.

In the end, if the colors Elain was wearing in book 2 matter, then we should be focusing on the evolution of the colors she wears. Not the ones she wore while human and engaged to a human man, living the life her evil mother predicted for her. Nesta started out the series wearing purples, then morphed to blues / silvers then finally ended in NC black which brought Cassian to his knees. That's not to say she never wears any other colors but it seems Sarah wrote her in the color of royalty, which is in line with her mothers vision for her future, only to progress to the colors of a warrior by the time her arc was over. Whereas Elain started her story in pinks and blues. Refused the leathers, had the life sucked out of her in NC black and finally ended up glowing in shades of purple (the color of royalty). Kind of fitting since her mate is the unknown heir to a court. The other side doesn't get to hold on to a single cobalt dress like it's their lifeline while ignoring the color symbolism throughout the rest of the series.

[drabbles-mc]

Get a Grip

Steve Murphy & OC Maristela Fernandez

Written for my beloved @garbinge for the 2024 Trick or Treat Exchange!

Warnings: 18+, language, alcohol, light angst, emotional hurt/comfort

Word Count: 3.3k

A/N: obsessed with these two actually. i've written a fic where they're exes. this is a fic that happens before they date. their real relationship exists only in my mind palace lmao

Part of Mari wondered if Steve had always been a night owl, or if that was something that was born out of necessity after getting placed in Colombia. It was hard to imagine him as anything else considering so much of their time together was spent when the rest of their apartment buildings were fast asleep. Even before they reached that level of comfort, intimacy even, with each other, they were sat at their respective desks on the base with no one else but them in the building.

Sometimes it was all three of them—her, Steve, and Javi. But there were some nights, most nights if she was being unforgiving, that Javi was whisking someone away for the night to keep himself busy and leaving Steve and Mari to their own devices. And usually all that meant was the two of them agonized over things that couldn’t get solved in a night, but at least they were agonizing over them together. The old adage about misery and company certainly seemed to ring true for the two of them.

She was one of the only CNP officers who even pretended to have any use for Steve and Javi. They were all outcasts in different ways but each in their own rite. She didn’t have to carry the brand of being an American in Colombia, so she at least had that going for her where Steve and Javi didn’t—but she was still a woman, and that was something that the two American DEA agents didn’t need to worry about when they walked into a room. It hadn’t been a smooth start for the three of them together, and some days it still didn’t feel all that smooth, but they had each other’s backs at least. That was something, even if some days they were still snipping at each other, Mari and Javi ping-ponging back and forth between Spanish and English and Steve just trying his best to keep up with all of it.

It was one of the rare nights when they’d each gone home somewhat early that the phone in Steve’s apartment started to ring. There was a very short list of people who would be calling his Colombia apartment at all, let alone outside standard business hours. Drink in hand, he got himself up off the couch to go and answer the call.

He was leaning against the wall as he brought the receiver to his ear, coiled cord swaying slightly as he spoke. “Murphy.”

“Hey.”

Steve’s brows pulled together. “Mari?”

“You free for a drink?”

Steve blinked slowly, trying to fit the words together like jigsaw pieces in his head. Sure, the two of them sometimes dipped into the bottle that Steve kept in his desk when they were working late, but it was never a formal invitation. It was always about work in some regard. This didn’t feel like that.

“Uh, yeah,” he finally got himself to speak. “Got someplace in mind?”

“Your place,” she answered, faster than she meant to, “or mine. Doesn’t matter.”

He was shaking his head like she could see him. “The hell’s goin’ on with you? You alright?”

She huffed. “I don’t fucking know, Murphy. That’s—that’s why I’m calling.”

He frowned in thought, trying to figure out which of the options she presented him with was a better one. Looking around his apartment, he quickly decided that however her place looked, it was still probably in better shape.

“I’ll come over.”

Even though she had been the one who told him to come over, Mari still found herself flinching when she heard the knocks at her door. Standing up from the tiny table in her kitchen, she quickly and quietly padded over to the door. There was one more knock and even though there was very little likelihood of it being anyone else, she still looked through the peephole to make sure that it was really Steve on the other side.

She flipped the deadbolt and undid the chain lock on her door before pulling it open. Steve looked the same way he always did, except with maybe more confusion in his features given the circumstances, although she also had to admit that confused wasn’t exactly a new look on him either. Even with that being the case, she was certain that she’d never been so relieved to see him.

“Hey, thanks for—” She stopped herself short when the door of the apartment down the hall slowly started to creak open. Mari would’ve known who it was even if she couldn’t see the woman’s face in the sliver of space in the door. “No te preocupes, Señora Sanchez,” she called out, loud enough to make a point but not so loud that it would disturb their other neighbors. Grabbing Steve’s arm, she angled his body so that he was facing the doorway of her neighbor. “Es mi colega.”

Steve felt a little strange being put on display like that in the middle of Maristela’s hallway, for her neighbor who looked as though she must’ve been nearing seventy years old at least. However, Steve didn’t let the woman’s long grey hair and short stature fool him when he could easily see the hefty wooden broom in her hand. He did his best to give as disarming of a wave as possible as he said, “Buenas noches,” with the thickest American drawl both Mari and Señora Sanchez had ever heard.

It must’ve been satisfactory to some degree, because the woman gave a tight nod before pushing her door shut again. In the eerie silence of the hallway, both Steve and Mari could hear the clicking of all the woman’s locks sliding back into place.

“Neighborhood watch?” Steve asked with a half-hearted chuckle, gesturing back over his shoulder with his thumb as he crossed the threshold into Mari’s apartment.

Mari smiled briefly and nodded. “Señora Sanchez is the nosiest woman I’ve met in my life besides my own mother.” She shook her head and walked towards the kitchen. “She’s earned it, though.”

It was the first time that Steve had been really inside her apartment. First time he was doing more than just dropping her off after a bad day. Usually he didn’t make it past the doorway, just made sure that he stood there long enough to hear the locks click and then he was on his way. Everything about this felt different. Almost intimate, almost comfortable. Steve wondered if, now that he was standing there with his hands shoved into the pockets of his jeans, Mari was feeling the awkwardness about it too. At least it was her apartment—home field advantage and all that.

“Drink?” she offered, already making her way towards the kitchen because she knew the answer.

Steve nodded, then noticed the mildly chaotic pile of shoes beside her apartment door. He got around to giving a real answer as he crouched down to start undoing the laces on his shoes. “Uh, yeah. Whatever you’re having’s fine.”

She chuckled, a dry and tired sound. “Good, because that’s all I’ve got.”

Steve’s shoes looked out of place amongst hers for a couple reasons, but the most noticeable of them all was the fact that they were placed very nicely next to each other while all of hers were more or less piled on top of each other.

He didn’t feel right going to her living room and sitting down on her couch, so instead he made his way over to the kitchen. She was just putting the cork back into the whiskey bottle when he stopped next to the counter. She slid the glass bottle against the smooth countertop with an amount of force that had Steve wondering if it was going to crack against the backsplash. It didn’t, and the way that Mari didn’t even give it so much as a cautionary glance had Steve thinking that it was far from the first time she had taken her frustrations out with alcohol in more ways than one.

“Hm?” She offered him the glass, eyebrows lifted expectantly.

He took it, murmuring out a quick, “Thanks,” before taking a long sip. When she mirrored his actions and didn’t make any move to head towards the living room, or start any kind of conversation about why they were in the situation they were in, Steve started it for her. “Something happen?”

“Qué?”

He sent his glass back down on the counter, making a point to do it gently. “C’mon, Mari. You’re not gonna stand there and tell me that you called me over here because you just wanted to spend some quality time.”

It got a smile out of her, even if it was a weak one. “Wouldn’t buy that, Agent Murphy?”

“Might be more believable if you weren’t still callin’ me Agent Murphy.”

Her smile softened a little more even if it didn’t take the exhaustion out of her eyes. “Steve.”

He nodded, picking his glass back up off the counter and lightly clinking it against hers before taking another sip. “Mari.” He paused a beat before asking again. “So? What happened?” He cracked a tiny grin like he knew he was being ridiculous but wasn’t going to be stopping himself regardless. “Qué pasó?”

She couldn’t help but laugh, what little Spanish he did know still coming out so stilted and laden with his drawl. “Don’t hurt yourself—I understand English just fine.”

She let out a deep sigh, staring down into her glass for a moment as she tried to figure out how she should explain to Steve why she called him and asked him to come over. She wasn’t really even fully sure of the reason herself. But she knew that she had to be careful, she knew how easily it could start to sound like something that she didn’t mean at all.

“I was on the phone with my mother earlier,” she finally started. “And she never,” she shook her head, “never asks about work. She doesn’t want to know.”

“Would you wanna tell her if she did?” Steve asked before he could stop himself. He was vaguely aware of the fact that he was probably just supposed to be listening, but this was officially the most he’d learned about Mari in a non-work capacity and he couldn’t pretend that he didn’t want to know more.

She laughed. “Fuck no. But it just feels, I don’t know,” she swirled around the whiskey in her glass, “it feels a little like she pretends that it isn’t real. My father, he doesn’t like talking about it either, but I know that he understands what’s going on, how real this all is. Pero, mí mama…it’s like she’s ignoring it all.”

Steve felt like he should be saying something but this was well outside his wheelhouse. If his parents had it their way, he’d be spilling government secrets out over the phonelines all the way to West Virginia. They didn’t ignore anything. He did his best to venture a guess. “Freaks you out?”

She nodded. “Yeah, yeah it fucking does. Acting like none of this is going on when we can barely get enough of a grip on this motherfucker to try and say that he won’t show up knocking on her fucking door?”

“He’s not—”

“That’s not the point,” she cut him off. “You know what I mean.”

He sighed, nodding. “I know.”

“All those late nights and listening in and, and for what? I feel like we don’t even have anything to show for it.”

Steve couldn’t stand there and pretend that he hadn’t been feeling some of those same things over the last couple of weeks. It’d been feeling like they were running a marathon but the finish line just kept getting moved farther and farther away. He hadn’t stopped to think about how that felt for Maristela though, someone who had her entire family in Colombia, living in the thick of it all. Every shoot-out and bombing, in the back of her mind she was always waiting for it to be happening on her parents’ street.

“We’re gonna catch a break soon.”

She let out a hum that was adjacent to amused. “You really believe that or are you just bullshitting me?”

He laughed. “I don’t know. Just don’t think I’ve ever seen you sweatin’ any of this before. It’s freaking me out a little.”

There was something simultaneously annoying yet the slightest bit endearing about the admission. “Well get a grip—we can’t all be losing it.”

He nodded as he brought the glass back up to his lips again. “Yes ma’am.”

It wasn’t supposed to turn into a late night of working. When Maristela had dialed Steve’s number, it was just because she wasn’t quite sure where else to turn, and the only person she knew for a fact would be up late and willing to talk was Steve. Part of her hadn’t even really expected him to agree to show up the way that he had.

But once he was there, and once they got talking about work, it was a quick and slippery slope into really getting back into work. Despite knowing that bringing things home with her wasn’t going to do her any good, Mari still had a habit of stuffing things in her bag whenever she’d leave for the day just in case an idea struck her at an odd hour, if dots decided to connect in the small hours of the morning.

So that was how they ended up sitting on Maristela’s sofa, her legs stretched out on the couch while Steve’s were propped up on the coffee table. She had a headset on, playing back one of the tapes that she’d brought home with her to see if she could try and glean anything from it. Meanwhile, Steve was sifting through photographs that he’d taken, ones that other officers had taken as well. Both of their empty whiskey glasses were on the coffee table, the warm light of the lamps in her living room giving them just enough light for them to see what they were doing without it feeling too bright or too harsh.

Steve didn’t remember either of them falling asleep. However, when he woke up it was to daylight streaming in through Maristela’s apartment windows. His legs, still propped up on the coffee table, were stiffer than boards as he tried to pull them back towards himself. He still had photographs piled in his lap, some of them drifting to the floor as he tried to grease the gears in all his joints again.

Turning to look at Mari, he smiled involuntarily. She was still fast asleep, head nestled in the crook where the arm of her sofa met the back of it. The headset she’d been wearing was cockeyed now, only one side still resting over her ear. It was no longer playing anything yet managed to act as a bit of a headband, keeping her thick dark waves of hair back out of her face. Still, though, she was clutching the tape player tightly to her stomach even in her sleep. She almost looked relaxed—it was the most relaxed Steve had ever seen her, at least.

Leaning forward, Steve propped his elbows on his knees so he could run his fingers back through his hair, pushing it back out of his face. Letting out a deep sigh, he tried to figure out what exactly he was going to do next. He didn’t think that Mari would really care all that much if he just took off—it wasn’t like he was supposed to be staying over anyway. Something about it still felt wrong though.

Slowly getting up off the couch, trying not to think about the popping in his knees as he did so, Steve did his best to straighten up the mild mess the two of them had created the night before. He neatly stacked all the photos he’d been looking at, tucking them back into their respective folders before setting them back on her coffee table. He took the glasses they’d been drinking of and slowly brought them back to the kitchen.

It wasn’t until he sat back down on the couch to put his shoes on that Mari woke up. Her awakening was slow and ungraceful, and Steve didn’t even try to pretend that he wasn’t watching her with complete and utter amusement.

“Fuck,” she grumbled out as she blindly peeled the headset off and rubbed at her eyes. She was still slouched over the arm of the couch.

Steve chuckled. “Well aren’t you just a ray of sunshine.”

Getting herself to sit upright, she finally opened her eyes all the way. She studied Steve’s face for a moment, like she was trying to figure out what exactly she wanted to say to him. He didn’t seem fazed by their situation, and she wasn’t quite awake enough to feel any type of way about it one way or the other.

“Coffee?”

He looked up from lacing his shoes. “Offering or asking me to make it?”

She smiled tiredly. “Offering, but if you’re offering…”

Steve let a long pause settle between them before cracking a grin. “I’m not.” He stood up, laughing as she rolled her eyes at him. “Nice try though.”

She tossed her headset onto the coffee table before getting up off the couch herself. Walking by Steve, she brushed her shoulder against his own with a purposeful shove. “Malparido.”

“I know that one,” he joked.

She tried to hide her amusement as she retied her hair, getting the sleepy frizz of it all as under control as she could. “Nice to see that all your months in Colombia are finally paying off.”

Steve followed her lead as she started towards her apartment door. There was no discussion needed really about what was happening next. Steve still had to go home, shower, and change before heading back to Carlos Holguín. Mari had to do the same. And neither of them wanted the other to be around for any of that.

Still, before she started undoing the locks on her door, Steve asked, “You good?”

She looked back over her shoulder at him. “Besides the knot in my neck from sleeping on the couch?” She shrugged. “I’m fine.”

“I just—”

She waved him off as she pulled the door open. “I’m okay. Promise.” She leaned against the doorframe and the smile on her face had a genuine air to it that Steve didn’t think he’d ever seen from her before. “Thank you.”

He wanted to say something else, but he wasn’t sure what. He managed a nod. “Yeah. No problem.” Clearing his throat, he found himself shoving his hands back into his pockets once more as he stepped out into the hallway. “I’ll see you at the base?”

She nodded. “Yeah.” She let him get a stride and a half away before saying, “And bring me a coffee.”

He laughed and shook his head, but didn’t turn around to look at her as he continued making his way out. Maristela watched him go, an upward curl to her lips as she did. He was hardly out of her eyeline when the door down the hall opened up to reveal Señora Sanchez. She looked extremely ready for the day, like she’d already experienced an entire morning as opposed to Mari who was barely this side of conscious.

Mari raised her eyebrows, waiting for her neighbor to say something. She shook her head at Mari, sarcasm in her tone, almost borderline mockery as she said, “Tu colega.”

Mari sighed, slouching against her doorframe. “Señora, es demasiado temprano para esto.”

The veil of judgment faded from the woman’s face, an odd brand of amusement in its place. The kind that women who had seen enough to know what’s coming tended to have. She smiled at Mari, gave a small nod as she went to slip back into her apartment again, leaving her with, “Buen día y buena suerte.”

She laughed, and even though the woman’s door was closed, Mari still said, “Gracias,” before heading back into her own apartment to get ready for the day.

(divider by @silkholland 💞)

Narcos Taglist (if you'd like to be added to any of my taglists please let me know!): @ashlingnarcos @narcolini @hausofmamadas @winchestershiresauce @cositapreciosa

@sizzlingcloudmentality @justreblogginfics @supersanelyromantic @padbrookcottage @mysun-n-stars

@raincoffeeandfandoms @proceduralpassion @artemiseamoon @nessamc

[mentallyillbutokay]

OBEY ME MUSIC HEADCANONS

𝙈𝙐𝙎𝙄𝘾 𝙏𝙃𝙀 𝘽𝙍𝙊𝙏𝙃𝙀𝙍𝙎 + 𝘿𝘼𝙏𝙀𝘼𝘽𝙇𝙀𝙎 𝙇𝙄𝙎𝙏𝙀𝙉 𝙏𝙊

[𝘼/𝙉: 𝙊𝙛 𝙘𝙤𝙪𝙧𝙨𝙚 𝙄'𝙢 𝙜𝙤𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙤 𝙞𝙣𝙘𝙡𝙪𝙙𝙚 𝙏𝙝𝙞𝙧𝙩𝙚𝙚𝙣, 𝙈𝙚𝙥𝙝𝙞𝙨𝙩𝙤 & 𝙍𝙖𝙥𝙝𝙖𝙚𝙡. 𝘼𝙡𝙨𝙤, 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙨𝙚 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙢𝙮 𝙥𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙤𝙣𝙖𝙡 𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙘𝙖𝙣𝙤𝙣𝙨, 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙄'𝙙 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙧 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙤𝙥𝙞𝙣𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙢𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙨!!]

•——————•°•✿•°•——————•

Lucifer

-> Definitely Opera

-> But on quieter days, he listens to White Noise (its not even music, but Lucifer would spends hours listening to White Noise)

-> Mans can never catch a break, so the likelihood of him actually sitting down and having a peaceful evening is definitely unlikely

Mammon

-> Rock

-> Occasionally Heavy Metal

-> Imagine he's out driving, probably pissed off with Lucifer, and he starts shouting out lyrics which don't even make sense but to Mammon, it's like a stress relief

-> You might also catch him listening to Twice, it's a hidden liking because everybody expects Mammon to be some scary demon, but in reality he knows like A LOT of K-Pop songs, that he randomly hums while counting his money

Levi

-> Anime openings

-> And K-Pop songs, like too much for one person to know

-> Karaoke is his prime time to shine, he's belting his heart out

-> But he does go into hiding for a good few months if he's caught singing along in his bedroom

Satan

-> Jazz, because he radiate the energy

-> Some nice slow Jazz in the background while reading his latest bought novel

-> It also helps him to release the tension and anger in his body

Asmo

-> Again, probably pop/k-pop/j-pop really, he lives for them all

-> Livestreams himself singing and dancing to Twice songs, dressed in flamboyant outfits

-> I think he doesn't really like rock or any depressing songs because they always disgust him, but maybe after a heartbreak he'd choose something melancholy

Beel

-> Definitely songs with a good beat to them

-> Not really a lyric person, he prefers sound with a rhythm so that he can workout to a steady beat

-> I'm going to say it's canon that he'll listen to a lullaby before going to bed, it helps him to sleep (bonus points if sheep!MC jumps over him so he can count sheep)

Belphie

-> Not really a music lover

-> Probably the occasional heavy metal song can be heard coming from the attic, this is when he starts belting out lyrics Satan has written about their hate for Lucifer

-> Prefers to sleep in silence, but he'll listen to lullabies whenever Beel puts them on

Diavolo

-> Taylor Swift

-> I'm not taking any criticisms here

-> This man is an avid Swiftie once he heard about her in the human world

-> Barb has to put up with his same shit every day, like I mean the same song on repeat, I feel bad for Barb

Barbatos

-> Honestly, I don't think this man listens to music

-> Like at all

-> He prefers silence

Simeon

-> Not so much songs, but harp playing

-> It's very angelic and beautiful to him, no lyrics interrupting the gentle playing

-> Gonna say its canon he purchased a harp to practise on, but he realised how difficult it was to play

Luke

-> K-Pop stan

-> He secretly enjoys whenever Asmo invites him to sing along to Twice & IZ*ONE

-> Although, he feels at ease to sit beside Simeon and listen to harps playing

-> He likes whatever Simeon likes, let's be honest

Solomon

-> Metal

-> I never really liked Solomon, but him with tattoos and listening to metal is one of the hottest things I could ever imagine

-> The occasional Twice song will pop into his head (blame Asmo for that)

Thirteen

-> Her favourite song is CPR (no, I will not be taking criticisms)

-> She prefers pop music to anything else, but she'll given all genres a chance

-> She also likes metal (hangs out with Mammon too much)

Mephisto

-> Lmfao, you think this dude likes music?

-> No no, he records Diavolo talking and he listens to that

-> Although, let's be honest, if Mephisto admires Diavolo that much, he will listen to whatever Diavolo listens to and then try to start up a conversation with him about the music

Raphael

-> He likes silence

-> Thinks that any genre of music is disgraceful

-> He will happily sit alone and enjoy the comfortable silence that surrounds him