#prince john imagine

[blue-sadie]

Fall From Grace

Imagine:

Being the head servant for prince john and also his mistress who he loves with his whole heart but it's always been a secret between the two of you because of his arranged marriage but one day his mother finds out and he has to choose the crown or you.

"Her I choose her I will always choose her, I love her more then the kingdom, more then I love myself, she owns my heart and soul without her I am no more then the dirt underneath our shoes"

[moonpascaltoo]

PRINCE JOHN / KING JOHN

╰┈➤ 18+ none of these stories belong to me! this is a masterlist of all  prince/king john stories i’ve read and reblogged! just thought it would be nice to have them all in one spot! (if your fic is on here and you wish not to be, let me know <3)

MASTERLIST • OSCAR ISAAC CHARACTERS • 05/11/24

@my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction ✰ my lord The ex-Prince is condemned to live out his days in exile.

@redeyerhaenyra ✰ bondage in the hearts of men After a night of drinking, you accuse John of being unfaithful, and punish him.

@boredzillenial   ✰  King John upholds his scandalous reputation and takes what he wants.

(not many sadly)

[cyanbeetle]

They mean so much to me

[ssadumba55]

Disney Princes Ideal Partners (Pt. 2)

Request: Hi I loved the Headcanon you made of A Relationship with the Princesses, so I could make a Headcanon of a relationship with the Princes. please it would be great

NOTE: I do not write for Pocahontas and I'm not a huge fan of Smith but in the interest of keeping this even and mirroring it with the princess one, he has been included

Aladdin

First and foremost, Aladdin wants a partner who accepts all parts of him. Sure, he can be cunning and sweet talking but he's also rough around the edges from living on the streets for so long

Someone who has a similar situation or who is always up for a good time would also be welcome

If you can provide (money or food) he will also be hooked, he's not a gold digger but the idea of stability and knowing where his next meal is coming from will definitely have him interested

John Smith

An ideal partner for John would challenge his way of thinking

He's a lone wolf, married to adventure so in order to have him falling for you, you'd need to be someone new, someone he wants to learn from

He wants a partner who will inspire him to think and see the world in a new way and likewise, he wants to share his own views and life with you

Li Shang

General Li Shang's first and foremost thought always is pleasing/making his father proud, so a partner who his father approves of is always a good start

He doesn't want a traditional partner who stays at home, he wants someone he can see as his equal, who will challenge him and who he can challenge

His ideal partner would be someone who respects him, but who he can also respect. Bonus points if you know how to fight

Naveen

Naveen is a fun loving guy, so his ideal partner would balance him out. They would appreciate and know how to have a good time, but when it comes down to it be able to be hardworking and serious when he struggles to be

He doesn't know a lot of the basic skills required to function, so he would appreciate someone who could either do that or teach him how. Someone he could also teach things he knows to, how to let loose, music, that kind of stuff

Someone who understands he's more than just a prince, someone who wants to be with him not because of his good looks or money but because he has a good heart and cares about them

Flynn/Eugene

Flynn wants someone who knows how to have a little bit of fun

His ideal partner understands where he's come from and wants to build a future together that means something, he wants them to truly know him

He also wouldn't mind if his partner is struggling in their own way, he wants to help them just as much as they help him. He wants the chance to prove that he's more than everyone sees him as and that he has a lot to offer

[s0fter-sin]

prince!ghost and lord in waiting!soap

ghost is a warrior prince, next in line after king price and it’s always been accepted he would be the lone ruler; never one for entertaining the courts or indulging foreign rulers trying to consolidate their power. he hardly acts like a prince at all, in name only when he spends more time as a pseudo captain of the guard. price has never begrudged him that, not when he himself has been a lone king since his inauguration

though he’s a warrior prince, he’s never lost the favour of the people; many see him as a guardian even if he doesn’t interact with the people as much as benevolent and stalwart king price. who he does interact with is the kingdom’s children; always ready to bend a knee and listen to bright voices, to praise stick swords and shields or hear the plight of a struggling family. it was a common belief that if he wasn’t out protecting, then he was with the protected; face covered, blonde curls shining in the sun

soap’s always loved ghost. as his lord in waiting, it’s been his job to attend him since they were young and even as a child, he’d idolised him; his skills in battle, his surety. he thought his life would be nothing but service, clothing a brat prince and making sure his shoes shined. but ghost has proven more than that; he treats him as an equal, consults him on strategy and court politics and over time that idolisation turned into love

and ghost has always felt the same. he’d begrudged the idea of a lord in waiting, not wanting someone always in his business but then came this spitfire who never missed an opportunity to push back on him; to make him dig deeper. johnny is more than some mere servant; he’s his confidant, his best friend, his… everything. he could be simon with him, not prince ghost

but simon figures that out too late

king price gets word from king shepherd, a kingdom they’ve only recently stopped feuding with and he’s offering up his son, prince graves, as a way to bond their kingdoms together and firmly put war behind them. price is ready to deny him, he doesn’t fear war from shepherd, when he sends some ancient laws that leave him unable to refuse. he hates it, hates that he’s ruining ghost’s happiness and feels like he’s betraying his adopted son but there’s nothing he can do

graves comes to their kingdom within the month and it’s clear from the moment he walks through their gates that he’s the opposite of ghost; arrogant and conceited, his ceremonial armour glossy and untouched by battle. he’s dismissive of their servants, of their ways, of their people and ghost hates him

graves insists that the wedding happen as soon as possible, pushing the craftsmen and cooks beyond their limits to prepare and every moment ghost spends with him, the more he dreads his wedding day. every evening he retreats to his room, exhausted, and it’s all johnny can do to keep him afloat; trying to keep him positive as ghost falls away and simon breaks in his arms. he wants to whisk him away like the old tales, the pain his oldest friend and love is in making his heart ache but all he can do is promise to be there with him

but it seems graves wants to take even him away

“soap’s been my lord in waiting since we were children,” ghost protests, voice barely clinging to civility. “i wouldn’t want to lose such a valuable worker.”

“there are plenty of decent servants in our kingdom; you’ll forget this one soon enough,” graves waves away, carding a possessive hand over his curls and it’s only bc he’s looking for it that soap sees ghost’s jaw twitch beneath his neck gaiter. “it’s custom for one marrying into our kingdom to embrace all that it has to offer, leaving who they were behind to become someone better. you’re entering a new life with me; you don’t need the baggage of this dreary place.”

soap feels sick as he walks behind them, his blank expression hiding all sign of his breaking heart.

“soap is beholden to me,” ghost declares. “we were sworn together by the old laws. i’m afraid a custom isn’t enough for me to break a vow to the gods.”

graves lets out a disgruntled noise, tugging harshly at one of ghost’s curls with only a thin veil of fondness; his conceding smile not reaching his eyes.

“i never made a vow to the gods,” johnny points out later. “price gave me to you because he was sick of me setting fire to the kitchens.”

simon hums and sets his freshly cleaned armour aside, turning to him with a twinkle in his eyes he’s barely seen since sheperd’s missive. “you pinkie swore that you would never leave me; that’s more powerful than any promise to the gods,” he says and soap’s thrown back fifteen years, to a willow tree big enough to touch the sky; to two boys from different stations who didn’t care that one was dressed in silk and the other in scraps.

johnny feels a lightness he hasn’t in a month as simon winks at him. “besides, do you really think graves is smart enough to figure it out?”

the days pass quickly, graves’ veneer of affection growing ever thinner, and before either of them are ready, it’s the eve of ghost’s wedding.

he’s said nothing, done nothing but stare at the wedding robes graves had tailored for him in the fashion of his kingdom and johnny doesn’t know how to break the silence. he draws out each second as he fusses with the cape piece and ensures the shoes shine in the fire light until he has no more excuses.

he sighs as he straightens up, brushing off polish onto his pants. “i suppose this is where i leave you,” he says with a weak smile but it quickly dies when simon still doesn’t look at him. “i’ll be here in the morning to help you get ready… good night, simon.”

johnny bows and makes for the door, trying to convince himself he didn’t just say goodbye.

but he’s stopped by simon’s hand loosely wrapping around his wrist.

he looks back as simon finally tears his eyes away from the robes, looking at him with such clear longing it almost brings him to his knees.

“i don’t want graves to be the first man to touch me, johnny,” he confesses and johnny’s breath hitches. “i don’t want to be married to another… not when the one i’m set to wed isn’t you. but if i have to do this… please let me feel loved one final time.”

simon’s thumb brushes the back of his hand; their kingdom’s greatest warrior caressing him with a touch light as silk. he doesn’t pull johnny in, doesn’t need to; johnny’s already sinking into his touch.

desperation and love tinge every movement; johnny dancing his fingers over simon’s neck gaiter until he all too happily removes it, baring his scarred cheeks and lips. johnny kisses each one, willing his love and his touch to linger above all others as they move together; sharing breath, sharing body, sharing soul the way they wish they always have.

when ghost makes his way down the aisle, it’s not in the fine embroidered robes graves had laid out for him. he’s in his battle armour; dark and weathered, the sign of the ghost, the warrior prince, going to battle. the only thing missing is his helm, tucked under his arm.

showing his hair; curls gone and shaved tight to his skin.

a thing done only in a time of great mourning.

graves looks irate and it’s the only spark of joy ghost feels as he stops before the altar; set beneath the willow tree where johnny promised himself to him. one final insult.

ghost is silent throughout the ceremony and in spirit and in grief, so is the entire gathered kingdom until the priestess reaches the final vows and suddenly, a great roar rises above the crowd as seemingly every child in the kingdom swarms the altar.

ghost is too shocked to do anything but let them push him away from graves, bullying their way between them like they’re preparing to protect him just as he’s always protected them.

graves is furious but the children stand firm in the face of his threats until he moves to strike one-

and freezes as soap’s blade finds his throat.

“you would dare hurt these children?” he growls, sword following graves as he stumbles back. “you’ve kept up your charade the entire time and here is where you show your true colours. i think it’s time i show mine.”

graves splutters as johnny turns to the priestess and king price, falling to one knee and offering up his blade. “your grace, i wish to challenge prince graves for the hand of prince simon!”

his voice rings clear and he feels the eyes of every person in the kingdom.

but he only cares for one man.

who is watching him with more love than he’s ever felt.

“who are you to challenge me?” graves sneers. “you’re nothing more than a servant; no better than the dirt on my boots.”

johnny doesn’t bother to look at him, too caught in the love in simon’s eyes and the grateful look on king price’s face. “then you should have nothing to worry about. you’ve been crowing your accolades from the rooftops since you got here; let’s see if you live up to the hype.”

because simon only ever introduced him as his lord in waiting.

never as sir soap- his second in command and one of the greatest swordsmen their kingdom has ever seen.

[seaslugfanclub]

Get ready for the twink-off everyone, and may the best fem win…

But fr tho I just wanted to have fun using the polls option..

[rockytheluver]

Full Masterlist~

Marvel

Criminal Minds

WWE

AEW

Outer Banks

Bands/Band Members

Others/Solo characters

If I think of anymore or you guys want to see some of a certain celebrity or character unmentioned, please let me know!

Message me if you want to be on my tag list!

Request Form can be found here

Rules can be found here

(Still getting everything situated so if you come across this post before everything is filled out I apologise!)

[slashingdisneypasta]

Non / Disney Villains x Reader || Headcanons [PART 2]

More characters, more kinks- I hope you find something here! ^^ A part 2 to this post.

Topic: SMUT- again.

Warnings/kinks: NOT. SFW, I can tell ya that much!! Ruts, panty-sniffing and stealing, somnophillia, sex work, alien fucking, probable size difference, riding, tentacle sex, dub-con roleplay, cybug!king candy/turbo??, legit breeding, referenced non-con (Just saying you couldn't get away if you wanted to), monster fucking, one-night-stand, orgasm denial and edging, dumbification and teasing, hypnotism and possible non-con, voice kink, betrothal, age difference, sexual sacrifice?, Step Mother/Step 'Child' (Not really a child!!!! An adult!!!!!), finger-sucking kink, and manhandling.

Includes: Sheriff of Nottinhgam, Mr Scroop, Captain Gantu, Scar, Wheezy Weasel, Ursula, King Candy, Eris (Sinbad; Legend of the Seven Sea's), Steelbeak (2017), Smartass Weasel, Kaa, Shere Khan, Mr Swackhammer, Shan Yu, Queen Narissa, Prince John, and Oogie Boogie.

Okay, the Sheriff of Nottingham may not seem to be the type to be hounded by his animal instincts but he does indeed experience heats. It starts out pretty tame, he just starts to particularly enjoy your smell when you're around, getting a little more touchey feely with you and perking up when you're around- but then he's taking your underwear to work and visiting you multiple times throughout the day, and finally- he's got his snout buried in between your legs when you wake up in the morning. He couldn't help himself!, sorry.

The next time that Silver's crew turns up at your work (The Brothel), its Scroop that gets to you first. Now 'kind' is not a word you would use to describe this one but he is still experienced- the way that old alien uses your body that night is damn practised. He roughly spreads your legs to the perfect angles to receive his selfish thrusts, the mean smirk on his face punctuates all the awful things he says to you in just a way that has you even more turned on, and the cold way he looks at you sends tingles straight up your spine. When he leaves in the morning, the only tip he offers you is a warning not to leave here- he'll be back sometime.

I know someone has mentioned this before, but riding Captain Gantu?? He is so stressed and just needs to be enveloped by something nice, and hot, and all-encompassing for a good long while. Your cunt/ass is his first choice, so impale yourself on his huge cock and slowly rock your hips. Don't let it go too quick, either- Make it last for hours, just live with the full feeling for as long as you can. And watch the stress leave his body.

Scar's a dom but he expects you to do all the work- And call him your majesty, hm? The only time that he'll service you, is when he thinks you're going to leave him or he wants something from you. Then the manipulative little shit will prove how king-like he really actually is... at oral. His licks dipping into you/leading up your length are lazy but deep, and purposeful, and strong, and he takes his damn time, too- dragging out your pleasure and your perfect orgasm until you're twitching and writhing underneath him. Until he's good and ready (A.K.A, when he's sure you're so absolutely tongue-drunk you'll agree to anything). And oh, he loves the sight of you like this. He thinks, maybe he should do this more often... then shrugs. We'll see.

Another lazy one is Wheezy. You wouldn't think he has much sex drive, and to be honest it is rather low- or was. When he saw you, though, he knew he wanted you. And he wanted to make you feel good. He wont lift a finger until he deems it necessary, those cold eyes just watching you undress while he stands fully clothed and smokes, the tiniest smirk on his face. He might feel tired enough to even just keep standing there and let you suck him off, first. But then he knows he has to give back, though, so lie down now baby. Spread your pretty legs. Or he'll sit down at the edge of the bed himself and pat his lap, getting you to straddle him and ride him. His movements will be slow, but methodical.

And we've reached the tentacle sex and roleplay segment- with Ursula, of course. You get to be the innocent beach-goer and she gets to feel you up like you don't know eachother. Imagine you're relaxing, laying on a rock a little further out from the beach, in the deeper waters, with your eyes closed against the warm sun when something tubular and slimy prods and slips around the confines of your bikini bottoms- enough creeping over you lips. Because she's lubed up quite enough from being underwater and you've been slowly getting wetter and wetter waiting on her, it doesn't take long at all before one fat tentacle is pumping into and massaging your meaty walls, your back arched up, your shaking hands gripping at the rock and the towel beneath you and your moans muffled by the second tentacle gripping and squeezing around your mouth. Your orgasm is silent, explosive, and Ursula promises more later before disappearing back into the depths of the sea..

CYBUG KING CANDY FUCKS LIKE A DAMN RABBIT. Any time and anywhere- you are his mate and sometimes he wants you so bad that he drools... Luckily for him- he's so ginormous that you couldn't get away from him even if you wanted to. So he has you. And he can take you and shove his huge, seemingly eternally hard cock into your tiny perfect hole whenever he pleases- which is very very often. Also every time he mates with you, the intent is to breed, to make a horde of little him's and you's, because you're just so perfect and he loves you and- godddddddddddddddd he wants you so bad. Lay down gum drop, he needs you again now~

Like with Sinbad, Eris makes it no secret that she wants you. It probably wouldn't change her intent to use you and probably ruin your life for some chaos~~ But if you wanted to, she would happily spend a night with you. Unlike Sinbad? You go for it. Her mouth tastes sweet like ambrosia and she kisses deeply, stroking your tongue almost soothingly... before she edges you for hours, denying your orgasm until you cry for her. She's the goddess of chaos, cutie... what'd you expect? She's going to destroy you.

Oh my goodness, Syndrome is such a dick. He has you, his assistant and lover, going about business (At MEETINGS, with important potential BUYERS) with a powerful vibrator inside you that he has the remote for in his pocket. Most of the day its on, but on a lower mode, just steadily turning you on and making you sensitive so when other people ask you for things they find that you act... really nervous, and awkward. They figure its just nerves, though. Syndrome'll turn it up so you're dangerously close to just cumming on the spot when he asks you for something and you'll feel his eyes and smug smirk on you as you go to do that thing, legs shaking and just desperately trying to control yourself. And no- you cant go to the bathroom. This is very important meeting, Y/N. Damn.

Steelbeak LOVES dumbification. Just making you as cock-drunk (1) as fucking possible so he's the smart one, for once. And he's a big guy- so he can absolutely plow you until you're absolute mush. Definitely takes advantage of that, because he just Loves having you whine and not even be able to answer the simplest of questions as he slows down again to a terribly maddening speed and tucks some hair behind your ear- like what's four plus four baby??... What's our address?? Sugar, where we at right now? ... What time is it? ... Heh, no baby that's so wrong! He'll chuckle, when all you can manage is to beg him and call his name, squeezing tight around him. With you grinding against him and clenching him so freaken good he wont be able to hold off from giving you what you want for too long, but- It gives him such a trip and makes him so happy while it lasts. So when he gives you that look at the end of the day... you know you're in for a long night.

On how Smartass listens to Greasy a whole lot more then anyone thought: You thought being with the gangster was going to pretty boring; You know, vanilla. You would get undressed, you'd kiss, he'd get off and you would fake it. But... good lord, you haven't even managed to get all your clothes off and you've already had an orgasm?? And he's not done???? Smartass knows exactly where the erogenous zones are and abuses them relentlessly. He's not gentle, of course, he touches your skin roughly and sneers in your face- but good god the way he uses his tongue is downright disgusting. In a textbook way, because he's not a big fuckboy and he just knows this stuff in theory- but fuck! it works.

Kaa... well I think you know where we're going with this one. You know we had to discuss it. Kaa and Hypnotism~~ Whether you're going into it having asked him for it, having wandered into the depths of the jungle in search for him, or you're just a poor~ unfortunate~ lost soul that accidentally found yourself in his coils- you will be totally at his mercy. This snake has a dark, dirty, demented mind despite the gentle sound of his voice, and he'll have plenty of creative ideas for what you can do for him: Starting with bending over at the waist to pick some flowers for him like a sweetheart while he 'watches over you'~ to holding your own legs open nice and wide for him~

Shere. Khan's. Voice. He knows what his voice does to you, and he definitely abuses the advantage. He loves to prowl up silently behind you when your attentions are preoccupied and speak directly into your ear- making your squeak, or gasp, or sigh. Its just adorable. He also talks a lot during your private times~ together; Giving you directions, like- raise your behind, darling., Open your mouth, would you~ , and Take a walk, darling... lets see if you struggle at all. If not... well we aren't finished with each other, are we?

Imagine being the only other Larger Sized One of the alien species on moron mountain- this is because of evolution. And it means that you're supposed to be sacrificed married to Swackhammer. Become his partner. Now, imagine your wedding night. You don't know him very well, you've barley spent any real time with him... and he's peeling away your clothes and touching you like he owns you. Like you're his. He smokes in your face, too, and presses his mouth to your skin greedily, licking up and tasting you. And yet... you find yourself keening into him, arching your back towards him, moaning into his mouth... is this biology, or do you like this gross old man???

You're a sacrifice to Shan Yu from the people in a village who desperately want to be safe. So they take you from your bed one night, and throw you out into the snow before him in just your sleep-wear. You willingly, though, go with him when he flashes a dark smirk down. You willingly sleep in the same tent as him. And you willingly allow him to take you inside it every night, moaning loud enough to keep the other men awake. Since you were a virgin when you were given over, you know only the pleasures that he can provide to you and you know that makes you the naïve, sweet, innocent one of the group of men around you everyday, and you do get teased (And desired. Coveted. Watched). But when Shan Yu has you moaning like a very common whore in the nights, his mouth worshipping your cunt/cock or his powerful manhood grinding against you- you cant bring yourself to give a fuck.

Oh my lord- Step Mother Queen Narissa!! Your father is a King, and she married him to develop her wealth and power, but you're the one that truly intrigued her. You reminded her of herself, when she was younger... prettier... untouched. Well... mostly untouched. Her fingers are buried inside you/curled firmly around you most every night, but... that's just a little fun between the two of you.

Prince John for sure has a finger sucking kink, for sure. Just tuck your thumb over his bottom teeth while you stroke him down there, or offer your pinky to him while your other slips under his tunic, or have him clean up all your fingers after he made a mess of them. He's quite good at it.

Oogie Boogie and manhandling!!! Yes!!! I've read stuff with this before but I love it. He throws you around like a sack of potatoes! Wrapping his canvas arm around your wrist or your waist and tugging you in quite suddenly against him, shoving you down onto that table so he can 'assess' you~, dragging you to him from across the floor or that table by your leg, grabbing you and twirling you back to him as if its all just a game... Anything to keep you close, keep his face and his chuckles against your neck, his 'hand' pressed against your hot as fuck crotch.

~

(... yeahhh that pun may have been intended)

[the-phony-king-of-england]

As much as I love Prince John, I don’t think I can understate just how badly he needs to apologise to Sir Hiss.

Like, a PROPER apology. For what could have been YEARS of mistreatment.

We only see a little snippet of it in the film, and even then, almost every scene the two share includes some sort of abuse towards Hiss by John’s hand. All the rude nicknames, the hitting, the throttling, the near constant calling him an idiot. The only remotely nice thing he ever says to Hiss is that he’d make a good court jester, and even then, it‘s so backhanded and Hiss seems to take offence to it.

He still stays, and still apparently cares for the prince, probably out of the goodness of his heart, but he deserves to be repaid for what he’s been through. I like to imagine John showering him with little trinkets and gifts and materials for his practice in a feeble attempt to make it up to him after he’s been released from prison.

After all, what would he be without Sir Hiss?? Hiss is his brains, his eyes. If Hiss up and left, he’d have nothing.

[enchantedlov3r]

My wonky text messages for the characters shown💓

-OBX💓

-Rafe💓

-John b💓

-JJ Maybank💓

-Pope Heyward💓

-john b and jj💓

-TWD💓

-Rick Grimes💓

-Daryl Dixon💓

-Rickly💓 ( rick & daryl )

-ASTV💓

-Miguel O' Hara💓

-PJO💓 (the series)

-Luke Castellan💓

-You n Luke's banter/funny moments ft.Percy

-Percy Jackson💓 (sfw only)

-TSITP💓

-Conrad Fisher💓

-Jeremiah Fisher💓

-Steven Conklin💓

-TLOU2💓

-Joel Miller💓

-Tommy Miller💓

-Ellie Williams💓

-nsfw needy messages

-funny messages

BONUS CHARACTERS:

-Austin Butler💓

-Glen powells characters💓

-Jacearys Velaryon💓

-Callum Turner💓

-Steve Rogers💓

-Bucky Barnes💓

[queer-ragnelle]

Just remembered my friend Lionel of Antwerp. The guy whose dad, King Edward III, named after Sir Lionel, cousin of Lancelot. Not to mention cosplaying as the characters in a mock Arthurian joust to an audience of French prisoners. Mad.

[radioactivewatson]

Masterlist

House of the dragons

Jacaerys Velaryon x OC Targaryen

The dragon's heart:

Sneak peak

Chapter 1

BBC Sherlock

Jim Moriarty x reader

Birds fly in different directions

[moncey-imagines]

Can you make some romantic prince john headcanons from Robin Hood?

of course! i havent seen robin hood since i was probably like 3, so this just gives me a chance to check it out with my big 18 year old eyes :3 ill get to it after homework and after i watch the movie :33

[thatrandomsarahchick]

I personally can't see Danny with Diana, so I'd go with John the monster fucker and Danny for the ship.

It is even better if Danny is in human form and has only just been introduced that day to John's allies in the fight. So they just see this random skinny Twink Bodying League level threats easily, so while having magic weapon storage pockets.

They think that John enchanted his clothes to store his extra weapons, only to find that every weapon belongs to Danny when Danny tells him he has to retrieve every weapon he pulled out and clean them before returning to him.

idea: scene with two characters eagerly stripping each other clearly about to bone, but they keep getting interrupted by finding carefully concealed weapons in each other’s clothing, so they keep just unholstering, revealing and unstrapping increasingly ludicrous amounts of hidden guns and knives as the clothes come off, and it’s lowkey killing the mood a little

[arwenkenobi48]

Hmm, I wonder how PJ and Sir Hiss would handle a camping trip…

Prince John would be hyping it up like there’s no tomorrow, going on and on about how he loves the great outdoors, the beauty of nature, etc

Sir Hiss does all the packing and keeps having to remind Prince John that he can’t bring a number of luxury items from the castle. “Sssire, we only need the bare esssentials.” “Hiss, this is extremely essential!” “I’m sure you can ssssurvive one night without Sir Leo, your highnesss.” (Sir Leo is a smol lion plush PJ’s had since he was a cub. It has definitely seen better days.)

PJ is very miffed that he can’t bring his bed.

Hiss ends up carrying most of the supplies, holding the bag up by carrying the handle in his mouth. His dignity has officially perished.

Then when they finally make it to the campsite, PJ is grumbling and complaining about everything. “I’m tired!” “My royal knee hurts!” “Hiss, I stepped in a stream!” and so on and so forth.

These two can’t build a tent to save their lives.

Hiss brought the Sheriff along to help them with this and the Sheriff brought his henchbirbs Trigger and Nutsy, which just added to the recipe for disaster. “The tent pole goes that way, Nutsy. No, no, not in Sir Hiss’s ear! Put it down, you imbecile!”

What follows is a montage of pratfall after pratfall as the royal blunderers turn constructing a tent into a Herculean task. Eventually the whole thing collapses on top of PJ, who throws a hissy fit and sucks his thumb, as usual.

Eventually, the tent is finally built. Sir Hiss almost falls asleep inside it out of pure exhaustion. He’s abruptly woken up by Prince John stubbing his toe on the cauldron they brought along to make some soup.

Lighting the campfire goes horribly. PJ ends up setting the tip of his tail on fire, screams bloody murder, jumps into a nearby river and spends the rest of the afternoon huddled in front of the fire, soggy and dismayed.

As the evening draws on, Sir Hiss gets a modicum of relaxation from the sounds of crickets chirping. He and PJ help themselves to a hearty bowl of tomato soup. Prince John ends up with about half of it smeared all over his fur and his startled yelp upon hearing a frog croaking makes Hiss fall into his own soup bowl.

As they try to get some sleep, nestled into the tent like two peas in a pod, Prince John reacts to literally any sounds, such as an owl hooting in the trees, by sitting bolt upright and gasping “What was that!?” Hiss grows increasingly annoyed by this.

PJ suggests they tell each other ghost stories until they fall asleep, but Hiss is not willing to repeat the Headless Executioner incident. Cue PJ being whiny again.

“Hiss, can you sing?” “Well, yesss, sssire, after a fashion. Why do you asssk?” “Oh, no particular reason. Just curious, that’s all.” “You want me to ssssing you a lullaby, don’t you, your majesty?” “Uh…yes.”

Sir Hiss sighs in relief when PJ falls asleep, thinking he’s finally got some peace and quiet. Then the snoring begins. Hiss regrets not bringing some earmuffs.

When the duo wake up the next morning, Hiss is curled up on PJ’s stomach like a little grass-coloured cinnamon roll and PJ is hugging him. They are both a bit embarrassed when they discover this.

Hiss realises that he forgot to bring any breakfast because he was so busy telling PJ he couldn’t fit his vanity table in the tent the previous day, so they decide to go fishing.

Prince John is disgusted by the sight of the fishing bait and drops half of it in the river. He then proceeds to use Hiss’s tail as a fishing line.

He did try to use the actual fishing line and got himself (and Hiss) completely tangled up. He also sat on the fish hook and told a nearby moorhen to shut up when it laughed at him.

They manage to catch one fish; a gigantic pike that almost eats Sir Hiss. As it flops around on the river bank, it bites PJ’s tail.

Both Prince John and Sir Hiss flee in terror from the fish and end up running all the way back to the castle.

They spend the rest of the day shakily sipping cups of tea and vowing to never go camping again.

[fortheb0ys]

FUCK ME LIKE THE MEN BETWEEN THOSE PAGES

Bottom John Price x Top Male Reader

Just Price brain rot🤤 I've always wanted to a model for MLM porn sites ngl so I'm living through this fic🙏 As usual not proofread :)

FEM ALIGNED + MINORS DNI

Prices would be one of those faceless models for those erotic gay romance novels. All his work would be faceless. Just something he did to make money on the side.

It was a secret that was long forgotten. Memories replaced by his military service. His body more scarred than his younger self's. His own books but they were just collecting dust in a box.

When you got together, you had found one of the books Price had forgotten that was on a shelf. Your eyes grew wide as you noiced it was Price's shirtless body on the front cover. A small mole on his left hip was telltale that it was him.

Flipping the book over and reading the synopsis reveals the dirty content of it. All the colour washes from Price's face as he sees what you have in your hand.

Price was about to open his mouth to quickly deny it but saw your giddy excitement. Though Price felt a bit shameful, he told you that there was more. A lot more.

With much hesitation from him and a whole lot more convincing from you, Price lent you the books. His amazing body on every single one of them. A new scar here and there as the

He had been surprised that you never poked fun at him and that you were genuinely interested in his past works.

You'd admit that the sex scenes depicted were the main thing that got you interested. You'd imagine Price vividly as the characters he model on the front covers. It didn't take long for you to read through the lot of them.

When Price would be on deployment, he'd get a text from you.

Cum on the front cover or on the pages. Or others with your erect cock slotted like a bookmark between the pages with the dirtiest scenes, precum dripping onto the sheets.

You'd send worded texts underneath the photo like "Try these with me?" or "What if were we the ones to do this?"

Price hated himself for showing you the books right before the mission, making the wait painfully long.

Sexualy frustrated and slightly pissed he had to wait for his deployment to end, Price would have a lonely wank in his barracks. His fingers didn't feel right. His fantasies never felt like details in the books. Nothing felt like you.

Once he got back, Price had to fight back a boner as the anticipation took over him. He went through countless cigars trying to get his mind on something else. The 141 Boys knew something was up. Soap had to control the intrusive thoughts to ask if you were waiting naked when Price returned home.

Which he wasn't wrong. The moment Price came through that door he was already painfully hard. Before he could even open his mouth to greet you, you were on him like a fly to honey, attacking his neck with bruising kisses. Whispering the dirty dialog from one of the books made Price weak in the knees.

Thus was the beginning of your roleplay sex.

Your playtime is always different. Numerous scenarios with one thing in common: Mind blowing sex.

Price would play a royal guard, and you, the prince. A prince in a loveless engagement to a princess. A guard pleading loyalty as he rides the prince on the royal throne.

A grade slipping college student fucking his teacher in an empty classroom for extra credit. Blowjows underneath desks replaces the outdated method of study and paying attention to lectures.

A hunter who falls in love with a werewolf he's supposed to kill. The wolf is just a dumb puppy who needs to be told what to do. With a collar around his neck, ready to be tugged at and the willingness to please his master, puppy soon becomes skilled at lapping at master's hole.

A rowdy rockstar and his stressed out manager. The musician needing to burn off the adrenaline after the show and the poor management needing the stress fucked out of him. The real show was played backstage. The manager put on quite the proformance, his deep moans sounded much better than your singing.

A sex therapist that prefers to take on a more hands-on approach. That skilled tongue was used more than just giving advice.

Or lastly, a priest beguiled by a gorgeous sinner. Guilt was all he felt but it felt like true heaven. God would forgive any sin if he showed true repentance, right? Wouldn't Jesus have died for nothing if we didn't sin?

Sure, some where terrible written and some were written by women with a fetish for gay men. Seeing you act out the scenes without missing a beat or breaking out into laughter while you quoted the dirtiest and most ridiculous things.

You'd remember every dirty word uttered. Every scenario memorized. Price was starting to understand what those white women on TikTok saw in those fucking books. It was just too bad they couldn't live it out like he could.