#preferably shisui

[uchihaharlot]

Shisui is such a cocky motherfucker when he wants to be. Picture this:

NSFW; I’m horny today; Let’s simp

The first time you have sex, as your kissing and teasing one another. All around in general shit that drives both of you wild. You tell him how good he’s gonna feel inside of you as your stroking his length, and he mentions how exceedingly wet you are from just him kissing you. In the next moment, you’re guiding him to your warm and wet entrance. Still slow kissing as he plants either thigh under your knees, hands under your head.

It’s that slow fucking stretch as he divides you on his cock, mouths open and panting over one another when he bottoms out. Eyes never leaving each others. How fucking good that first full length thrust of his dick feels. It just makes you more wet. Contorts your face in pleasure. The way your insides fissure and throb faster with each stroke; that damned gentle kiss to your cervix.

Embarrassingly you are about to cum. Shisui will coo in your ear that ‘no one has ever fucked you like this, have they?’ He just knows how good he is. How quickly you pulse around him with each slow and deep hip roll. You breath heating his neck. Continues to say things like, ‘only my cock can make you cum this fast,’ ‘such a good girl for squeezing my cock so good.’

[abnormallyadamant]

Being horny over a fictional man is probably not good for my health. How desperately my body craves a touch it will never receive because it doesn’t know what it would even feel like.

My uterus is on fire. I’m ovulating again, can we just not today?

[abnormallyadamant]

In a face fucking era and all I want is for Shisui Uchiha to shove his leaking and throbbing cock in my mouth.

Would be so hot to be reading a book and he just comes up and gently straddles your chest. Pants tight; cock hard already. Looking up from the book you can just see it in his eyes. Sometimes the mood to stuff your face with his cock is stronger than the need to bury himself in your sweet little hole. He just wants to see your face up close and full of him.

And I think this time would be tender experience, with only 1/3 of his length. He really likes how you suck on the tip and the sensitivity of your lips over his foreskin just sends him.

Definitely would come fast. He just needed a quick release, and you were home early so he didn’t have to use his hand. Though now that he thinks of it, on the final slurp he strokes his length and coats your pretty lips and cheeks before giving you the last few drops to suckle.

[abnormallyadamant]

Shisui…please manifest yourself and fuck me rotten like the good girl that I am. I know you have that stamina 🥺😩

[x-authorship-x]

And let's be real, Inoshi would be so approving of Sam. Loyal, honest, stalwart and steady in the face of darkness, shockingly mentally stable despite like, everything? Plus, he'd be so supportive and such a good influence on Shisui. What's a therapist dad not to love about him? Good job, Shisui, finally making some good decisions lol. Not that Shisui actually, y'know, remembers his peusdo-dad, but I'm sure that somewhere buried deep in the back of his mind he'd know he's making someone proud

Excuse me I need to sit down and write an AU of The Red Istari where Shisui shows up hunting the Uruk-hai and yoinks Sam and Frodo into the boat to run, swearing to protect them as the fellowship splinters (and ofc grieving but still faithful to gandalf's memory, the hobbits see "nice wizard" and go ahhh okay) and therefore you have shisui grimly leading them to the 'Shadow Mountain' with Frodo having an existential crisis in a battle of faith against the evil ring, and a connected crisis with the creature gollum stalking them, whilst Sam is stuck in the strangest genre mix of tragic adventure and romantic holiday "there was only two forks and Sam won't share with Frodo so guess he's sharing supplies with the gorgeous nice wizard" and this is both very BAMF, very bittersweet, and very inappropriately amusing

Edit: Inoichi would be like-!

Shisui, therapy nightmare: *marries healthy and wholesome hobbit the OG*

Inoichi in the afterlife:

[a-flux-uchiha]

Recent favorite relationship(platonic or romantic) dynamic:

Nervous cheetah/golden retriever

But is also

Guard dog/extrovert

[forthereaderinserts]

Happy Valentine’s Day

Here’s what I think my favorite characters would give you

Kakashi has never really been in a relationship before and spends his whole stressing out if you’ll like the chocolate, flowers and plush toy he bought.

Madara buys you flowers and cooking breakfast and making chocolate with you, prefers labor of love to show how much he cares.

Hashirama is a sweetheart through and through, he knows exactly what sweets you want, what stuffed animal to buy you, what color the gift should be. All smiles when he comes up to you.

Tobirama is a rather stoic man but he does try, when he’s not tangled up with work, he’ll walk with you through the stalls on the day, buying things and playing games together.

Sasuke isn’t in the village when Valentine’s Day comes around, but that doesn’t mean there isn’t something waiting for you on your windowsill.

Shikamaru thinks it’s a waste of time and a dumb holiday…until he sees how delighted you are upon seeing the festivities. Let’s just say he likes the holiday, according to you.

Shisui is a sweetheart as well, he loves Valentine’s Day and goes all out for his beloved partner. Making breakfast for them, gifting them flowers and handmade items, even ninja tools he had custom made so you’ll always know he’ll always be there to protect you. Even as a name on a weapon.

[obitos-whore]

Domestic bliss and father/ husband headcanons with shisui please!

Hnnng, thank you nonnie for unintentionally feeding my need for this man with your requests!

────────────────────────────────────

Shisui is 1000% husband material and you can't tell me otherwise

He's basically doing 99% of the house chores without you even needing to ask him because he wants to support you as much as possible

His favourite chore is cooking, preferably with you

Breakfast in bed!

Despite being a grown man and father, Shisui will not hesitate to act childish and play silly little pranks on you; like hiding in the closet and jump out to scare you, or turning off the lights when you're in the bathroom

Always kisses you and your little one(s) goodbye before he leaves the house

So so soft with his kid(s)

Literally takes them with him everywhere in those baby carrier wrap/sling thingies (I don't know what they're called, rip)

Reads bedtime stories to them every night and also playfully wrestles with them when they're older

Takes his kid(s) to uncle Itachi regularly and watches in amusement when his best friend is trying to keep up with the little one(s)

Certified baby whisperer and master of soothing even the fussiest baby in no time

Climbs into the crib and even sleeps in it

Finds it low-key comfy in there

Look, Shisui loves his little rascals to death and beyond and will do basically anything for them. But if there's one thing that scares him, it's a dirty diaper

This man has been soaked in the blood of his enemies and covered in their guts, but Jashin forbid he has to change nappies

Will dry heave throughout the entire process suck it up buttercup, jeez

“How can such a small butt create such a horrible thing?? Stop laugh- HUEHHRG!”

Always puts a towel on his shoulder when he carries his kid(s) around because apparently his kid(s) love to puke on him

[uchihaharlot]

How does Shisui (or the other Uchiha) cope when he's finally, blissfully rawing you for the first time ever? 😩

Nonny,

This is so sweet 🥹 I was actually cackling because boy do I ever have a dirty mind (and for once Madara is on point and I had a nap).

NSFW; how the Uchiha boys cope with the feeling of your sugar walls for the first time; artificially induced orgasm lol 😈

Madara:

Lol. Well, firstly. He was always raw dogging you and making you full of him. 😂 Contraception was a thing, but like, who the fuck wants to wear a pigs intestine?? Even if its clean, that’s just not something Madara would ever consider. If you ended up pregnant, you were merely upholding your agreement in this marriage. However….that doesn’t mean that the first time he penetrated your slippery moist cunt it wasn’t divine. He actually can be tender, and you wouldn’t jump in a dry ass pool. So, of course, Madara was deliciously teasing you until there was little resistance the first time he had you. Phew. Your inner sanctum sucked and swallowed him whole, deliciously. He stifled his groan but the first signs of pleasure tumbling out her mouth has this man a mess.

Obito:

🥹 I’m sure you’ve all sensed a pattern here for our dear heart, Obito. Such a sweetie pie. So nervous and gets unbearably excited when his s/o asked this one time to just feel his thick cock dredging her precious moist hole. Firmly believe Obito whined like a squealing serpentine belt the whole time she was grinding up and down his girth. If she spoke; he didn’t hear it. Was doing every thing in his power to not be a two pump chump! And it worked, until she got louder, started to swell and then came all over him. Driving Obito even more delirious with pleasure. Would prefer she had at least one more orgasm before he did but that notion is thrown out the window when he’s already coming. Filling her for the first time ever. Fucking it back into her even.

Shisui:

😭😭😭 my bby! Was huffing and sucking in his bottom lip like a Dyson, eyes blissed out and breathing so damn heavy. Rhetorically asked if you were heavens above, his cock was pulsing from your ringed muscles gripping him on first drag in and out!! Head tilted back, gorgeous curls bouncing on impact when he really got into it. Don’t even get me started on when they stick to his forehead and you have to brush them out of the way!! He’s trying so hard to hold on too, for you. Though you’re definitely more than sated, mostly exhausted, “…just one more, baby. Please..’ Shisui desperately needs to feel your warmth before coating you from the inside out. How can you say no to a face like this? You can’t. There is just no way you would break this man’s heart and not choke his cock again, allowing him to swell and pulse within you. Filling you and slipping out to see it drip out. Only for him to gently stuff it back inside with two fingers and plug you up.

Itachi:

I’m positive the first time Itachi did the deed raw it was rather embarrassingly quick! Said something along the lines of, ‘my apologies,’ after finishing. He was so frustrated, but didn’t show it one bit. Wasn’t ready to be swallowed whole by your sopping heat, even worse when he stole a glance and could actually see how slick he felt. (I’ve been putting this off for some time, but this will not do for this man). If you already had one ‘free space’ round, what’s another? Something in the air today would have Itachi lulling your consciousness to bend at his will. You didn’t even see it; but could definitely feel it in the stagnant state of your psyche: Tsukuyomi. It’s a one liner you’re all too familiar with, it reverberates the echo chamber of his playground, a feigned replica of your bedroom. A place you’ve never been for salacious purposes. As a cascade of several contrasting climaxes physically immobilize you, those famous last words seem to pass through you like wave lengths… ‘you’re already under my genjutsu..’ As the curtain to reality slowly drops, altering the landscape in a hue of reds and blacks.

You’re in danger.

[tossawary]

Sasuke not wanting to be a warrior and giving up on his revenge against Itachi is wildly OOC without some really strong push for this change, which is why I lean towards an SI-OC for a House Husband Sasuke AU, because the amount of trauma and pressure that canon Sasuke is suffering from all angles is intense. But the way that I could MAYBE see canon Sasuke giving up on recklessly focusing on revenge against Itachi is if there had been other survivors of the Uchiha massacre.

Like, okay, I understand that the Uchiha massacre was the plan of a couple different puppet masters, so it's not going to make sense. (Massacres do not, as a rule, ever "make sense". They are bad full-stop.) Part of the goal here is obviously to just get rid of the Uchiha clan and the potential threat that they pose to future plans.

But Sasuke could have just died on some random mission as a genin and then what? What if Madara and Obito lose? This is an incredibly violent world filled with incredibly clever ninja, it's unreasonable not to be concerned about any of them being offed randomly by accident. People like Danzo and Zetsu then have no more new Uchiha children to use and to harvest if anything goes to shit. And their stupid plans are often so overcomplicated that there should be a high chance of things going to shit!

They have cloning, of course, but secret cloning operations are probably expensive and presumably have a relatively high failure rate, and require the cooperation of people like Orochimaru and Kabuto. What if you just don't have the material left for a good cloning process?

Itachi is in a really weird position here and I do not well remember all of the different puppet strings that are being pulled here. I assume that Madara and Obito wanted all Uchiha dead for some reason? But I would have assumed that people like Danzo and the Third Hokage would have preferred to leave most of the children alive to mold into a new generation of Uchiha soldiers. I vaguely remember something about Danzo maybe being prejudiced against the Uchiha? (EDIT: Yeah, Danzo probably doesn't want any kind of law enforcement looking into his shit and the Uchiha are the cops, but that doesn't fully explain why he would want to get rid of all of the Uchiha children too.) So maybe Danzo wants them all gone too, and everyone is just forced to leave Sasuke alive because they know Itachi WILL go more insane than he already is if Sasuke bites it in an "accident".

"The Uchiha were planning a coup" is such an unsatisfactory explanation for the actions of a lot of these characters. It is IMPOSSIBLE for every Uchiha to have been 1) an adult, 2) a ninja, and 3) someone who voted for a coup and participated in it. We know ninja like Itachi and Shisui felt more loyal to the village itself and they couldn't have been the only ones. Uchiha have been defecting from their clan in order to join the village instead since Uchiha Hikaku abandoning Madara for Senju Hashirama after Izuna's death and before the creation of the village.

And we know that this is a sexist, patriarchal world! There would have been some men who would have decided the course of action FOR their spouses and their children, if the spouses and children were aware of this ninja operation at all. EVERY single disabled and elderly person in the clan was in on it too? EVERY civilian? Since Hashirama, NO Uchiha has ever married outside of their clan? Okay, I can buy that the Uchiha clan would be incredibly controlling regarding their bloodlines, yes, and I know that they were being isolated and that the more "progressive" Uchiha with outside lovers were probably being killed off by their enemies. Fine. Maybe all of the other adult Uchiha were cooperating and had impossibly good information security, let's pretend that's true.

But that still leaves the issue of the children! Would an isolated Uchiha clan trying to orchestrate a coup not be super controlling about encouraging their members to get into "good, traditional families" and make more "loyal Uchiha soldiers"? Fascist states often get really weird about that kind of thing. Sasuke cannot have been the only young Uchiha child at this point in time! It would be... REALLY weird if he was.

(Itachi is not heroic for this. It is a TRAGEDY. It is horrifying. There are no heroes in this part of the story and the best that I can say for Itachi is that he was another victim of really weird and twisted circumstances.)

Anyway, I think it would be fun to have an AU where Sasuke is left as the clan head of a bunch of children, at least 10 of them or so. He's the oldest among them at 8-9 years old. (I'm pretty sure that other fanfictions have done this before. Someone must have done this concept before.) Everyone expects Sasuke to just dump the children on some village caretakers so he can pursue his ninja career, in order to become the new powerful protector of his clan and murder his brother, but MAYBE this situation is something that would make canon Sasuke decide against all manipulation that he can't actually afford to chase Itachi.

He still wants to be super powerful, of course, so that he can murder Itachi if his brother ever comes back, but otherwise? Rebuilding the clan is more important. He's staying at home for his training and accepting parentification with wide open arms and a deep scowl.

(There is the danger of ROOT making off with Uchiha children, which is also unpleasant to think about.)

I think it would be funny for Naruto to deal with the fact that his rival has been a dad since the age of 8-9 years old. (Sakura: "IDIOT. How did you not KNOW that??? EVERYONE knows that!")

I also think it would be funny if Sasuke, when he was annoyed with Kakashi's bullshit, unconsciously pulled out a squeaky tweenage Disappointed Dad Voice to express his frustration with his teacher. (Sasuke: "Do you think that it helps anyone for you to behave this way???" Kakashi: "Hm, there are many things that I don't like about this.")

[abnormallyadamant]

Undoubtedly Shisui Uchiha. Like, no. Just lay down, and let me fuck your face. No complaining, just me moaning.

i am not arguing with a man with curly hair. whatever you say babygirl

[abnormallyadamant]

On the rag again and I can one hundred percent say that Shisui would still be fucking me (and you) despite how gross it might be.

You think a little bit of blood scares this man? Hardly, and not really at all. For someone who has seen the tail ends of their enemies guts spilled many times over, menstrual blood is the least violent to shed.

So, undoubtedly you're going to end up in bed with a towel under you as Shisui pumps his gorgeous cock in and out of your weeping pussy. And, for those of you who have climaxed on your period...you know how fucking good it feels. So you're not going to complain when you cum a few times on his lovely cock.

[belit0]

What if y/n calls him "daddy" while they're doing the deed? 👀

Mmm, daddy, daddy, if you want it, drop the add'y 🛐

Indra

- "Sir, for you." Not quite fitting the role of the father figure, Indra is more like the cold, misunderstood older brother. He prefers to be called Sir or Lord, avoiding intra-family nicknames, not his cup of tea.

Madara

- "Say it again." Madara can never get too much of it. Daddy is probably one of his favorite nicknames, and he will never force or ask to be addressed like that, but when it comes voluntarily out of (Y/N)'s mouth, it destroys him.

Izuna

- "Good girl, just like that." Izuna has no particular preference for any specific nickname, anything that denotes authority on his person is good enough for him, and any name that makes him come out on top in the hierarchy works.

Obito

- "You're going to make me come (Y/N)." Obito himself is the one who wants to call (Y/N) "mommy," desperate for her approval and flattery, but to hear her so vulnerable and loose, trusting him like that, gifts him with all the momentum he needs to dominate completely.

Shisui

- "Say it louder love, louder." He says it with a smirk on his mouth, because to have (Y/N) so surrendered under his hands and admitting such an intimate kink so effortlessly, means he's doing things right.

Itachi

- "(Y/N)... fuck." He doesn't expect it at all, and when that word hits his ears he is surprised with the tingles it generates all over his cock. Itachi was unaware of the effects of the dominant role on him, and being called daddy takes him to cloud nine.

[kidsinsaturn]

Hi!!

Glad to have you back after so long

Can I request what kind of hair do shisui,Itachi and madara prefer

Do they like long,short,silky or curly hair??

hair preferences

[🗼] omg YESS i have curly hair so im sorry if I went a bit biased:(

characters: shisui uchiha; itachi uchiha; madara uchiha

genre: sfw

warnings: gn!reader; just mentions of hairstyles

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..

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-boy shisui doesn't care hahah but idk I have a feeling he has a thing for super long super straight hair

-he thinks it looks elegant, delicate, and just silk-like

-shisui just prefers hair that isn't tangled because he enjoys a bit too much running his fingers down his lover's hair, like all the time

-HOWEVER on the other side, I also see him liking some unruly, messy hair. he is a silly, open-minded boy that just prefers both ways. I see him as a fan of emo and punk hairstyles

-he likes unique hairstyles but also appreciates a basic mane. he just wants a partner okay??? he loves ponytails and braids though

-shisui is just weird lmao, because he wouldn't even mind greasy hair, thin hair, or super thick hair. he just wants his s/o to take care of it because he doesn't like dandruff

-itachi also isn't such a picky boy when it comes to physical appearance. he values the persons's intentions and personality more than their looks

-BUT if he had to choose, he has such high standards because hello have you seen his hair?? he would demand a s/o with nice, taken care of hair. doesn't really matter the style

-I feel though that he would lean a little bit more towards natural hair, like if yours is bleached or dyed, he would be like ammm

-again itachi is a sweetheart and only seeks someone who is true with themselves. he cherishes personality over looks. of course he won't turn at you if you have dyed hair nooo hahah it's just a small personal preference of his

-i do see him liking straight black hair a little bit more maybe because of his mami mikoto. to his eyes, she is the most beautiful woman

-lmao madara. im sorry but he will NOT be with someone who has basic ahh hair lmao

-madara likes uniqueness, independence, and just creativity. he may have his hair long due to poor self-care when young BUT he likes it now and intends to keep it that way even if he is revived

-he thinks you are sexy if you just stand out of the crowd just because of your mane. curly hair or super thick hair, OR long, curly AND thick hair?? what you are trying to kill him?

-he doesn't mind different hair colors, as long as you don't have more than two because he thinks you just look like a tie-dye shirt

-and idk I also see him liking red hair a little bit too much. maybe out of his rivalry with hashirama, he always wanted to have something with a redhead

[animeomegas]

which naruto omegas do you think handle it better with an alpha who is a bit of a crybaby when gets sick? i had a really bad fever the last few days and it amuses me to think how my mom could have handled it like a champ while i felt like a victorian child about to see the light. for example, neji would feel a little smug seeing how his alpha depends so much on him, but i also think that the first times he would be terrible at trying to comfort them lol

Haha! My brother is a lot like that XD Let me give you my thoughts! <3

Neji - You're so right in that he's great with looking after a sick alpha. He's not bad at comforting, as long as you're following his instructions. If you've eaten, had some water, taken some medicine, bathed etc. at his instruction, then he's happy to indulge in some cuddles or head pats when it's resting time. He does leave as soon as you're asleep though haha.

Shino - He's pretty good with this. It does make him a little anxious at first, but once he's got the clear from a mednin that you'll be fine, he actually prefers an alpha who will stay in bed and be dramatic haha. If you go wandering off or insistently try to do things even though you're sick, you'll stress him out. He makes a schedule of care for food and medicine and bathing, and follows it to the letter. During any of the down periods, he always sits by you and reads a book or does some work. He won't leave you alone.

Haku - He's incredibly indulgent with any level of drama while sick. He does give that look when he thinks you're overreacting a bit, but you can have anything your heart desires if it will make you feel better. Anything. He'll rub your back for hours if you so desire it. He also makes the best herbal remedies of anyone on this list. His soups are medicinal and tasty!

Itachi - He finds solace and peace when caring for his loved ones, so in a weird way he kind of enjoys it. There's no judgement, just love and gentle care. He will be disappointed though, if you put up a fight over eating or taking medicine. He is hesitant to cuddle, only because he's been told not to cuddle with sick people his whole life, but he's willing to sit with you as long as you need. If you ask him to stay, he'll stay.

Shisui - He's definitely going to tease you about being so dramatic, but all his teasing is designed to make you feel better, not worse. He's surprisingly competent at looking after you in some ways, except cooking. He's going to outsource the cooking to someone else. But other than that, he's quite doting and will definitely give in to cuddles, especially if you cry. He's weak to crying.

[mixelation]

Just thought of smth. How do you headcannon the lgbt situation in Mutagenicity? Because I'm imagining Deidara and Itachi getting into one of their usual fights and Tori yelling "Would you two just kiss already?!" which then prompts the following reactions

Itachi who's been raised as a good little breeding stud for the Uchiha and Konoha as a whole "Don't be ridiculous Tori, two people of the same gender cannot be in a romantic partnership. How would we secure future generations of shinobi?"

Deidara who's a result of one of those breeding programs and is done with the whole thing "Ugh, with that asshole? Please I like to think i have some taste."

And Kushina who's been suppressing her desire to make out with Itachi's mom since grade school because of her own insecurities about being the last of a clan "Now now boys, it's perfectly natural to want to wrestle your friends into the dirt and have your way with them, but you have to stop it when you get older so you can make lots of cute babies, dattebane!"

Ha!

Personally my preference for Naruto fics is that people are largely cool with same gender relationships. That being said, sexism definitely exists in ninjaland, so certainly there's going to be some expectations about how romantic/sexual relationship "should" work. In Mutagenicity specifically, Itachi has been brought up with the idea that he needs to eventually marry someone with a working womb and produce a child.

However, I've been thinking about this more like... It's normal for ninja off stuck at war to have relationships with each other, and ninja skew male, so gay sex (especially among men) is pretty normalized. Then you get home from war and actually the dude you've been hooking up with is also your best friend who's saved your life twice, and you move in together and hold hands in public sometimes and no one will bat an eye. Gay dating maybe gets an eyebrow raise but for rando ninja, no one really cares. People only start having Opinions on your relationships if 1) you have a bloodline limit, or 2) you have specific clan duties related to having a biological child (so, you have a bloodline limit or some other heritable traits valuable to your clan, OR you have some sort of responsibility to make an heir). For Itachi, he both has a ""strong"" sharingan his clan wants him to pass on, AND he's supposed to make himself an heir.

People like Sasuke and Shisui, who are NOT heirs but are important Uchiha also with "strong" sharingan, probably have some expectations/social pressure from both the clan and society at large to make sharingan babies, but they could probably settle down with a man without causing a huge fallout. At some point Deidara will probably start getting weird comments about if his children will inherit things, but he doesn't have his own clan to pressure him and I can't see Minato's administration actively pushing him. Kushina almost definitely felt like she needed her own child to continue the Uzumaki, which is why she went for a super risky pregnancy over adoption, but also I think she and Minato also just.... really wanted a kid and their own little family, regardless. Like they make sure Naruto gets her clan name and not Minato's to continue that, but neither of them are upset Naruto didn't inherit the Uzuamki bloodline limit. Naruto is there because they love each other and just want a kid. If Kushina had fallen in love with a woman instead and wanted to marry her, I think she would have just gone "whatever, I'm marrying who I want because I do what I want, and I'll figure out getting a sperm donor later."

So, for Mutagenicity, it would be semi-fine if Itachi were gay and had a side piece who's his "real" romantic partner; he just needs the official wife and heir for political/pass-on-the-sharingan reasons. If he really wanted to, he could probably pull a "well, I'm clan head, and I say I want a husband," and then everyone would be mad for decades and the clan would insist he make a baby via surrogate (this is the Homemade Dynamite route, BTW, except all the clan elders are dead and Mikoto supports Itachi marrying Deidara because who else could possibly handle her freak son). However, Mutagenicity!Itachi isn't gay; he's asexual. He's shit out of luck. His lung condition does mean the clan is like "uuuuh well maybe it's time to bring in some outside genes--" so if he tricks the one woman he knows who's his age and can also stand hanging out with him into dating him, everyone will leave him alone--

Anyway, I think everyone on Team 4 knows same gender relationships are an option. I do think Itachi is very bad at recognizing he can have what he wants, so he might not consider it's an option for him specifically.... but Mutagenicity!Itachi specifically isn't super into men, because he's not really into anyone.*

*I think I do have meta somewhere where Itachi's like "why can't I just marry Shisui :(" and this thought isn't because Itachi is attracted to Shisui, it's because Shisui is someone Itachi cares about deeply, gets along with, and therefore he can see himself enjoying living with for the rest of his life. If Shisui fulfilled the requirement of "can give birth," Itachi would marry him in a second.