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Past! You: So, did we ever end up marrying someone? Maybe someone pretty, upstanding, or intelligent?
You: …uh
You looking over to Kakashi who’s definitely does not have his kid self in a headlock:
You: well-he’s pretty.
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I imagine there’s group therapy for it and if you’re not a ninja and just a normal civilian I imagine it’d work
A soulmate au for the average every day civilian in the naruto universe must fucking suck
You’re never meeting your soulmate because they’re already dead and has been dead since they were 11-13
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A soulmate au for the average every day civilian in the naruto universe must fucking suck
You’re never meeting your soulmate because they’re already dead and has been dead since they were 11-13
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You: You can’t just experiment on people like that!
Orochimaru: oh yeah? And who’s gonna stop me? God?
Jiraiya: But you’ll be forced to leave-
You: I’m gonna get you pregnant.
Orochimaru: don’t threaten me with a good time.
Tsunade: I fucking hate it here.
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Orochimaru: good morning, my dear, I was wondering if you’d like to accompany me to a wedding.
You: Um- sure but who’s inviting you to a wedding-?
Orochimaru: ours.
You, in wedding attire at the altar: wait what
#naruto imagines#naruto x reader#incorrect x reader#orochimaru x reader#he’s the bride no matter your gender#he’s walking down the aisle.
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They probably stabbed Danzo to stop him from being able to become Hokage ngl
And once they become Hokage they’re very specific about their friends
Kakashi: When it comes down to it, let me go after Obito.
You: …alright but if you become gravely injured you’re never leaving this village again. I swear to god Kakashi, if you make me or your team worry about your life-
Kakashi: Yeah- yeah, I get it! Alright..
Sakura: Wow, you’re so good at all this fighting stuff and ninjutsu. Where didn’t you become a shinobi?
You: Oh I wasn’t allowed to.
Sasuke: Wh…what?
You: Yeah, I’m not allowed to, I’m banned.
Sakura: …why?
Kakaahi: how do you get banned from being a ninja?
You: Apparently I bring a very “let’s start a rebellion, burn unfair governments and destroy the rich” vibe to groups of people that the elders aren’t cool with.
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I hope you guys know I love seeing your comments and tags in reblogs I’m just very anxious
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Tbh I think toga reader would get taken in by Tsunade and idk how many people have listened to Epic the musical but their dynamic is Athena and Telemachus
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Naruto: so…any news on who Tsunade wants to take over while she recovers?
You: Me.
Naruto: haha, funny joke!
You: …
Naruto: what…
Sakura: Wow, you’re so good at all this fighting stuff and ninjutsu. Where didn’t you become a shinobi?
You: Oh I wasn’t allowed to.
Sasuke: Wh…what?
You: Yeah, I’m not allowed to, I’m banned.
Sakura: …why?
Kakaahi: how do you get banned from being a ninja?
You: Apparently I bring a very “let’s start a rebellion, burn unfair governments and destroy the rich” vibe to groups of people that the elders aren’t cool with.
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Thinking about it more…since ninjas have a chance of inheriting something from a parent (rasengan) I guess that technically means you’re able to use that or maybe something they were born with that they didn’t even know
Like wym naruto never uses flying kunai teleportation
Is he stupid?
WAIT. i have a question for the reader with the toga abilities.
if you turn into naruto, does kurama come with you????
I…hmmmm no I don’t think so considering you have to be born with the ability for Toga to replicate it. It’s why she and Monoma can’t copy one for all, Midoriya wasn’t born with it.
But it would be funny for Kurama to suddenly pop in like
“WHO ARE YOU??? WHERE AM I?????”
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Actually you know what? Great angst potential. You have a way to drive off Orochimaru and have a secret to keep.
“Oh- you wouldn’t want me as a host I’m gonna be real.”
“Why’s that?”
“Well I’m gonna die in like 12-13 years not to mention I don’t have a lot of chakra.”
“…you’re going to die???? How do you know that?”
“Uh- shit happens I guess? But I’ve always known I was!”
Since breathing techniques are more something like tai jutsu but also way way way WAY beyond that does that mean a demon slayer could just…fuck shit up and no one would be able to stop them unless they stopped themselves
Like I’m talking hashira level demon slayer but even regular demon slayers are fuckin crazy
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Naruto: So, Kakashi-sensei, how did you fall in love with Y/n-sensei?
Kakashi: Our eyes met…and everything else was fleeting.
Sakura: Y/n-sensei, how did you meet Kakashi-sensei?
You: oh, we were kids and I punched him. He looked at me weird.
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One really bad downside to being a demon slayer in Naruto.
You’re going to die at 25 if you’ve activated the mark.
Since breathing techniques are more something like tai jutsu but also way way way WAY beyond that does that mean a demon slayer could just…fuck shit up and no one would be able to stop them unless they stopped themselves
Like I’m talking hashira level demon slayer but even regular demon slayers are fuckin crazy
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Funnier if this reader became Hokage because of Tsunade out of spite
Sakura: Wow, you’re so good at all this fighting stuff and ninjutsu. Where didn’t you become a shinobi?
You: Oh I wasn’t allowed to.
Sasuke: Wh…what?
You: Yeah, I’m not allowed to, I’m banned.
Sakura: …why?
Kakaahi: how do you get banned from being a ninja?
You: Apparently I bring a very “let’s start a rebellion, burn unfair governments and destroy the rich” vibe to groups of people that the elders aren’t cool with.
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You: I think we should see all people as equals and not discriminate against those who are half clan and other clan
Elder: Unbelievable. Next.
Sakura: Wow, you’re so good at all this fighting stuff and ninjutsu. Where didn’t you become a shinobi?
You: Oh I wasn’t allowed to.
Sasuke: Wh…what?
You: Yeah, I’m not allowed to, I’m banned.
Sakura: …why?
Kakaahi: how do you get banned from being a ninja?
You: Apparently I bring a very “let’s start a rebellion, burn unfair governments and destroy the rich” vibe to groups of people that the elders aren’t cool with.
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Walk of shame back to the blog because I forgot a trigger warnings tag
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You: You can’t just experiment on people like that!
Orochimaru: oh yeah? And who’s gonna stop me? God?
Jiraiya: But you’ll be forced to leave-
You: I’m gonna get you pregnant.
Orochimaru: don’t threaten me with a good time.
Tsunade: I fucking hate it here.
#sorry guys we were the reason Tsunade fucking hates this village 🙂↕️#but I’m getting that man pregnant either way#orochimaru x reader#pregnancy tw
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