#pre-travel hacks

[khihi]

listening to tracy chapman's entire discography all the way through will fix me

[kyuujo]

↳ screen time!

↳ michael kaiser x fem!reader ↳ nsfw ↳ voyeurism, slightly dubcon (reader is recorded without explicit knowledge), mutual masturbation (sort of), perv!kaiser, voyeur!kaiser, solo male masturbation, language, dirty talk, fantasies, sexual tension(ish), sexual pining, overstimulation, i think i got everything pls lmk if you catch something!

↳ 1.3k words

↳ uwaaah dahlings!! thank you guys so much for 106 followers!! it means so much to me! i’m so happy i can provide some entertainment to so many of you <333 it makes me so happy to do that TwT) this piece is actually a repost from my (deleted) blog, and i’m thinking it’ll be the last repost i do (idk why but reposting just feels weird to me T-T) but i hope you guys enjoy!! thank you so much for reading (im so sorry that this note was so long i had so much to yap about)

kaiser knew he was abusing a system that he shouldn’t even have knowledge of — but he simply couldn’t control himself.

the instant ness had clued him in on that little piece of information about the camera system, kaiser’s mind shifted straight to you; cute, quiet, shy little you. and ness, bless his soul, didn’t question kaiser even once when he requested (demanded) that ness find a way to hack into the secondary cameras hidden within the personal rooms of the facility.

kaiser wasn’t sure why jinpachi ego had felt the need to install such a security system, but he was deeply thankful for it.

because there would be no other way kaiser could ever witness this beautiful sight over and over again — you laid out across your bed, legs spread and fingers working over time plunging into your sloppy little cunt.

slick squelches and soft moans echoed through the earphones and traveled straight to kaiser’s dick, which was already hard and leaking despite only having started the recording less than a minute ago.

that was just the visceral effect you had on him; you could brick him up instantly with just a single glance in his direction.

and seeing you like this — oh, the effect was catastrophic. kaiser swears his dick has never been harder before, that he’s never felt so turned on and sensitive, each stroke of his hand down the shaft electrifying and borderline overwhelming — and when he ran the pad of his thumb along the tip to collect the dripping pre his whole body nearly convulsed.

it was amazing, satisfying, and yet so, so torturous. because at the moment, all kaiser could do was stare at your pretty cunt swallowing your fingers and imagine how it would feel for those velvet walls to be closing around his cock instead.

and suddenly, his hand just didn’t feel good enough anymore — kaiser imagined you must have felt the same way about your fingers, given the scrunch of your eyebrows and how desperate your movements were; it just wasn’t enough. you clearly needed something longer and thicker to fill you up.

and kaiser could do that for you — oh, how he would make you feel so good. he’d slide his cock in nice and slow so could you could feel him inch for inch, so you could enjoy that satisfying stretch it’d give your tight little pussy. he’d fuck into you recklessly in the same way you’re doing with your fingers while whispering sweet little nothings in your ear just to feel your walls flutter around him.

“so good, meine schöne rose,” kaiser whispered as he tightened his fingers around his cock, eyes zeroed in on your fingers sliding into that sweet nirvana between your legs. for a moment, kaiser could almost convince himself that he was buried inside your tight little pussy and not his own hand. “keep going. that’s it.”

kaiser’s breathing was quickly laboring, his abdomen twitching and tightening with every quick stroke of his hand. your soft moans and whimpers spurred that heat within his gut, and if he closed his eyes and focused, kaiser could feel your plump lips against his ear, honeyed voice begging him to fuck harder, to fuck you completely stupid, until all you could think about was his cock —

kaiser’s eyes snapped open when his ears were graced with a particularly loud moan from the earphones, and that liquid heat in his gut ramped up to a boiling point at the sight he was greeted with.

your other hand had abandoned its stationary place on your stomach and was now rubbing fast circles against your pretty clit in time with your thrusting fingers, and your whole body was trembling from the new stimulus. kaiser had seen this enough times to know exactly what was soon to come.

“oh, sweet girl.” kaiser murmured reverently, chest fluttering and hand picking up speed around his cock. “so fuckin’ pretty like that.”

and you were — you were so fucking breathtaking. eyes slipped shut and plump lips parted to release those sweet, sultry moans; fingers sliding into the prettiest folds and rubbing against the cutest clit; that perfect body trembling and shaking.

it was a vision of pure erotic perfection that was etched permanently into kaiser’s mind; a vision that he craves to see in person while he ravages you with his cock.

“c’mon, meine rose. you’re so close.” kaiser cooed, hand jacking his cock so fast that his wrist was beginning to ache — but there was no way he was going to slow down, not when you were both so close, hanging onto the precipice of pure rupture. his gut clenched almost painfully and his balls twitched, signaling the fast approach of his climax.

“i’m gonna cum, sweet girl. mmh — fuck, ah — you’re gonna make me cum — i’m coming —”

kaiser had to bring his other hand up and clamp his teeth around it to muffle the sounds that bubbled up in his throat. all it took was three more strokes and he was exploding, warm, sticky ropes shooting all the way up to his chest. kaiser couldn’t even control the moans that slipped out, nor could he control the way his hips jerked up to fuck his cock into his tight fist as he rode out his orgasm, eyes glued to the screen in front of him.

your escalating moans seemed to add even more fuel to the fire, stretching out kaiser’s orgasm to the point that his cock became almost unbearably sensitive — but he kept pumping his fist slowly, keeping his cock alive as he reached forward with a shaky hand to restart the video.

“just once more, meine schöne rose. make me cum one more time.”

[wannaeatramyeon]

Meeting Student!Gitae Kim for the first time

G/N. Pre Mexico. Pre silly lil murders :))) Masterlists

Whispers and rumours swirl. Passes from student to student, teacher to teacher. There's something wrong with him.

"Him there. In that class. With the dark circles and heavy lids, he's weird. His father's a gangster."

"What? Really!"

"Yeah. Don't talk to him, he's trouble."

Is he? You wonder. As you watch him, a tall lanky figure already heads and shoulders above the rest of the student body, you can't help but think he's like you.

Adrift. Waiting for something better or waiting out the years until you can leave this lonely wretched place.

Both outsiders, not quite fitting in.

.

.

You start to observe him.

At first just quickly peering at him when he's around, then naturally over time, growing bold and searching for his presence, watching him when you think he's not looking.

The boy, with strong features and haunted eyes, has no friends and doesn't talk much.

His gaze is constantly far away, like he's spiritually and mentally not here. Appearing deep in thought.

Scheming, you've heard others say. Plotting.

Maybe. Not many people talk to you either though the gossip is kinder.

Head in the clouds. Daydreamer.

You're strange, they also say, their tone never tinged with fear. Something akin to pity can be picked through their words.

.

.

"What do you want?"

You had averted your eyes fast but not fast enough.

The tall boy says it like he knows you've been watching him. That your wandering glances at lunch isn't a one-off.

"Nothing." You respond, voice coming out croaky and startled.

He arches a brow, amusement dancing in his eyes, the first time you've seen anything more than apathy on his face.

You hold his gaze and to your surprise, he's the one that breaks it first and strides off.

.

.

"Hi."

His eyes flicker towards you.

"Hey." You repeat, swallowing down your apprehension and drumming up all the courage you can muster to ask, "Is this seat taken?"

Time stretches for what feels like an eternity. He doesn't react to your question though the only way you know you have said it aloud is from the way he watches you.

Like a predator, sizing you up, working you out.

You realise, with great embarrassment, you might have mistaken his words the other day for an understanding between you.

Just as you're about to give up, accept the rejection and disappointment and leave him alone, he finds what he's looking for and finally tells you. "No."

It takes you a moment to remember your original question and you release the breath you didn't know you were holding.

In hindsight, you wished you didn't sit with him.

He offers no other conversation and your self consciousness spikes when he watches you as you pick through your lunch.

.

.

The whispers and rumours change once other people notice the odd company you keep.

You can't bring yourself to mind.

He's quiet, eyes unnerving but you feel like you've found a kindred spirit.

.

.

A cigarette, held between his fingers, is offered to your lips.

You had stumbled upon him during a free period at the back of the school. Past the field and among the weeds and rubble where no-one, not even the cool kids, go.

You lean forward to grasp it in your mouth, the interaction peculiar and intimate. The cigarette itself feels unfamiliar and foreign, you didn't want to tell him that you don't smoke.

A small flame clicks into life from his lighter and he holds it to your tip. Eyes never moving off yours as the ember starts to burn.

You take your first inhale, feel the poison in your mouth and on your tongue, travelling down the back of your throat and-

"Shit-" you sputter and hack your lungs up. You cough and cough, eyes watering, cheeks turning red.

He laughs, low and rumbling, as he thumps you lightly on your back.

As your breath returns, he asks, "What's your name?"

You tell him and he trades his in return.

"Gitae," he says, plucking the cigarette from your hand and taking a drag.

[piictochat]

Sometimes I wonder why code lyoko never had the fandom that ML has but then I remember the recycled animations, the sketchy scripting, the clumsy romances, the colossal foreheads, the high stakes video game-esque VR world with pre-selected character classes, time travel, the literal princess in a tower who’s in love with the man behind the machine and evil super computer that literally hacks things in the game and IRL with murderous intent (ie giant murder teddy bear, hacking a school bus to drive a bus full of kids into an electric plant) and then I REALLY wonder why Code Lyoko never had the fandom ML has

[overb]

“Guardian Angel (in some sick, twisted sense)”

Tim had seen his fair share of trauma, sure. He’d watched the Flying Graysons fall, watched as Dick Grayson lost his parents. As he lost his entire family.

Sometimes, he wondered what that would feel like. If Tim’s parents died, would Tim scream and cry like Dick Grayson had? If it had been murder, would Tim Drake become some kind of vengeful Gotham vigilante?

It made him feel sick to his stomach, but he was pretty convinced he wouldn’t care. Sure, there’d be a few tears. Tim would miss them, miss the way his mum used to tie his tie before they abandoned him at whatever social advent they’d dragged him to. He’d miss the way his dad used to set him on his knee, before he saw Tim as this annoying pre-teen that relied too much on his parents, and talk him through the relics he was bidding on on his laptop.

Now there wouldn’t be that much to miss. Tim tied his own tie, made his own way to all the social events he was invited to. He absentmindedly scrolled through auction sites, had google alerts on for the key phrases his parents adored, but his dad didn’t bother with him anymore. There were no more identical faces of awe as they found something they could just not pass on!

In a way, he figured, he was lucky. He had none of that attachment that caused Bruce Wanye to be Batman and Dick Grayson to be Robin because – yeah – he’d figured it out. The night he’d matched the flips, flipped through his memory to the night at the circus, he’d thrown up. Mrs. Mac had come to Drake Manor to drop groceries that morning and had been nice enough to call Tim off school, tucking him into bed with a bucket and cool flannel against his forehead. He’d also cried.

It was unfair that such good people had to suffer so much. It was unfair that they came out of one eventful night with the world on their shoulders. He was amazed they were still such good people. Even at the ripe age of nine, Tim would trade anything to be able to go back in time and take their burdens. It wouldn’t bother him– maybe it would be nice to have a family for more than two weeks at a time. Maybe it wouldn’t, but Tim would sure he’d never really understand what he’d lose. He was far too used to being lonely. No one else deserved it.

But there was no way to go back in time, not without the League’s help. In a few years Tim might be able to hack his way in there, considering he was halfway through the Batcomputer, but it would be a while. He’d keep time travel as a back-up plan.

Plan A was to make sure that Gotham’s vigilantes wouldn’t be hurt. He’d try his best to protect them, to warn them and keep them away from the tragedies they didn’t deserve to be hurt by. And Tim would still keep some sense of surveillance, sure, but if it was an unavoidable accident the Bats wouldn’t be getting involved. Tim could keep it to himself, a twisted secret for the best. He didn’t have anyone to tell anyway.

[perhaps-in-anotherdream]

[CN] 6th Anniversary Event: “Love is on the way” – (Li Zeyan’s Prologue)

⌚ since global server won’t be getting this event anyway, I’m not going to add spoiler warning~ ⌚ ٩(ˊᗜˋ*)و

[notes from Anika before we begin]: after the last day of the anni event, i was crying so hard that it felt like a sin to not bring it over haha. however, i don’t exactly have much time to spare despite the off days from uni, so this might take a while but i’ll try to update regularly and phase by phase~ (*´▽`*)♡

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

【Event Common Prologue】 

The Loveland city hall and tourism bureau have arranged a “Love is on the way” event to celebrate the city being acknowledged as the best city for romantic experiences. 

MC wins an “RV Travel Gift Package” in the lottery event held by the city hall as a part of the program ~  

────────── 

【Event Extended Prologue – Li Zeyan】 

LZY: Why the frown when you’ve just hit the jackpot?

MC: You’re here just in time! Come and help me decide on a new travel plan.

As I agonize over the itinerary for the RV trip, I see Li Zeyan walking in and hurriedly wave at him to come over.

He takes the route map, gives it a brief glance, and then points to a path that starts from Tongyun Ancient town.

LZY: This one looks like it has the most potential for fun.

MC: My thoughts exactly, but the distance is quite far. It’d be quite a long drive…

LZY: This isn’t our first time going on a road trip like this.

LZY: Plus, the fuel coupons I won are enough to cover us for this entire long-distance trip.

At this unexpected answer, I can’t help but burst into laughter.

MC: Hahaha, what!? You know that’s clearly not what I’m worried about!

LZY: [laughs softly]  Dummy, I know.

Contemplating the potential challenges that’d arise in managing his time around, I gently shake his hand.

MC: Taking this route will also add a few extra days to the travel duration we initially planned. I have some vacation days, but will you be able to adjust your schedule?

LZY: Absolutely.

Hearing him respond without the slightest hesitation, I look up at him in elation.

LZY: Every year around this time, when have I ever not freed up my time?

─────

Lounging on the sofa, I cushion my head comfortably on Li Zeyan’s leg, my eyes glued to the short video playing on the phone––

The scene shows couples, family members, or friends lifting their right fists and solemnly pledging adorable vows like “to never be a wet blanket” before setting off on their travels.

Just picturing the scene of Li Zeyan raising his hand to take a vow for tomorrow’s trip involuntarily causes the corners of my lips to hook upwards.

LZY & MC: [simultaneously] During this trip––

Our simultaneously resounding voices catch me off guard for a moment, and then I lock eyes with him.

LZY: Found something fun again?

MC: A super awesome travel hack we’ve never tried before!

LZY: Seeing how you used such a long preamble, it doesn’t sound like something good.

MC: You’re being biased! Who knows, what you wanted to say might not even be as cool as my hack.

LZY: Very true. After all, I only did some pre-travel preparation, and that’s all.

With a subtle smile playing in his eyes, Li Zeyan hands me the tablet he is holding.

My eyes can’t help but widen in astonishment as I look at the minimalistic yet inclusive travel guide that covers everything from destinations to transportation routes and activity arrangements.

The itinerary includes almost every place I wish to check off, along with numerous delightful surprises.

MC: Where did you find this rice wine ice cream? It looks really yummy~

LZY: …you’re the one who found this.

In my bewildered gaze, he digs up our chat history from two days ago and opens a check-in post titled, “I’ll be heartbroken for anyone who hasn’t tried the rice wine ice cream, okay?”

MC: I have no recollection of it at all…

LZY: It’s normal to not have any recollection. Since you started planning, you’ve sent me 63 check-in posts in just two days.

MC: It’s because there are just too many fun things.

Feeling a bit embarrassed, I stick my tongue out at him, but soon, my eyes are drawn to the many empty time slots in the itinerary.

MC: CEO Li, are these time slots designated for spontaneous activities?

LZY: Yup, just in case a certain someone has spontaneous whimsy to add more activities halfway through the trip.

Looking at his perfectly strategized itinerary, I suddenly feel a little guilty about the “travel hack” I’ve just boasted about.

LZY: Tell me, what’s your travel hack?

Looking away from his eyes filled with interest, I try hard to compose myself. Then, I raise my chin with a false bravado.

MC: Your strategy is amazing, and it just so happens that my hack can make it even more perfect!

He noncommittally arches an eyebrow, waiting for me to continue.

MC: Recently, there’s a trending travel vow making waves on the internet…

LZY: …sure enough, it’s a childish game.

MC: No, it’s not! Only the people who are closest to each other can take this vow together!

Seeing my eager expression, he sighs in compromise.

LZY: How do we take the vow?

Not giving him a chance to regret it, I promptly raise my right hand to the side of my forehead and gesture for him to follow suit.

Li Zeyan remains silent for a moment, but eventually, he still closes his right hand into a fist and raises it awkwardly.

LZY: It’s silly.

MC: We’re being silly together~

My eyes crinkle into a smile, and I hand him the vow from my phone.

MC: I solemnly vow, during our anniversary trip, to never cry out because of being tired, to never stay cooped up all day lying in bed, to never get upset over taking ugly photos.

LZY: With mutual tolerance and accommodation, we will complete all the planned activities.

MC: Should anyone violate––

Realizing that his voice has suddenly ceased to be heard, I look to my side with confusion, only to find him staring at the vow with a crease between his brows.

LZY: “An irreconcilable conflict will be declared between the two parties”?

MC: The vow can be effective only when the punishment is severe enough~ Looks like a certain someone is scared now.

Brushing off my immensely complacent expression, he regards me with a contemplative look.

LZY: [he’s amused af LOL] Before proceeding, let’s clarify what “irreconcilable conflict” actually means for our situation.

LZY: Do you intend to return all of Huarui’s (LFG) investment?

MC: [confused] …Eh?

LZY: Also, which one of us will Pudding reside with?

MC: [even more confused] …Pudding?

LZY: And, moving forward, the entrance to Souvenir…

MC: W-W-W-WAIT!

I finally catch on and promptly extend my hand to cover his mouth in an attempt to prevent more dangerous and dreadful words from escaping.

MC: How can such icy words come out of your 37-degree Celsius mouth!

–

[T/N]: In case the joke escapes anyone, 37°C = 98.6°F, which is the normal body temperature – quite close to the boiling temperature and a far cry from the freezing point, so “technically,” he shouldn’t be able to say such “icy/ chilling” words 😂

–

LZY: [laughs softly]  Just wanted to confirm whether a certain someone who is beside herself with joy actually has any practical plans.

LZY: But I think someone else is feeling scared at the moment.

The slightly curved corners of his lips leave a tingling sensation in my palm, giving away a hint of teasing.

Realizing that he is deliberately messing with me, I can’t help but feel indignant.

MC: I’m not scared at all; increasing the challenge a bit more is perfectly fine with me.

LZY: As long as you don’t regret it.

Faced with his amused gaze, I clench my teeth and lay out the rules.

MC: How about counting by the number of times someone fails to keep their vows? Each violation results in a deduction of one point, and the person with the lower score shoulders all the consequences.

LZY: To avoid any attempts to dodge responsibility, let the other person have the authority for judgment.

MC: What if we end up with a tie?

LZY: What would you want to do?

MC: I most certainly don’t want to split up with you!

Upon hearing my immediate, unfiltered answer, he lets out a muffled chuckle.

LZY: In that case, after the game begins, make sure to uphold this attitude of yours.

────────── 

🚐 • First Location: To be updated

────────────────────────────────────── 

[copperbadge]

You know, I had thought that the old jokes about bad airline food, which were very common in the 1990s, had stopped mainly because airline food had gotten better. It had to have, right? As food technology and chemistry improved, we must have fixed that. I just couldn't know, because mostly I fly Southwest and rarely take a flight longer than about four hours, and Southwest just doesn't do meals.

But now I think probably it's just that airline food is much rarer. Even flights that would have had food twenty-five years ago (pre-9/11) now mostly don't. So it's not that the food is better, it's just rarer. The comedy is less relatable.

I will say that the mushroom tortellini I got in my "lunch" on this flight home was pretty edible, but when the tray was set in front of me I looked at the hardtack bread roll, the very basic salad with its little pot of bland yogurt dressing, and the tortellini in very scant tomato sauce, and I thought, I bet I can hack this. (It's kind of a conference trick of mine -- I have startled many a stranger at a conference breakfast buffet by producing from seeming nowhere a breakfast sandwich, and then informing them that they, too, can take a croissant from the pastry rack, eggs and sausage from the chafing dishes, and jam from the condiments, and make a breakfast sandwich fit for a king.)

Then I decided to write some fanfic of my own damn novels because Eddie Rambler has definitely done this, and if anyone can fix airline food it's him, and if anyone's going to be a willing accomplice, it's Noah "self-propelled trouble magnet and food garbage disposal" Deimos.

"Hey there, friends and fans and everyone keeping it new out there!" Eddie Rambler said, but unlike his usual Photogram openings, his voice was hushed -- not subdued, but much quieter than usual. "I'm coming to you from somewhere over the arctic, and pretty much everyone else is asleep, so I'm trying to keep quiet, which as everyone knows is for me quite an effort. And if you're wondering why I'm not my normal golden well-lit self, it's because I'm filming this in the first-class cabin of an airplane using ambient light and a phone flashlight for a spot." 

He leaned back, so that his face wasn't filling the camera anymore, and the rest of the room came into view: a tiny nook with a reclining airline seat. The arm was lifted, and Eddie was sitting sideways on the cushion; on the reclined back of the seat, next to him, Noah was perched, grinning impishly.

"Now, I couldn't sleep so Gregory kicked me out of our two-person cabin, and Noah here had a cabin to himself because his folks are sharing one and he's the odd man out, so he let me come in here to film. Friend of the gram Noah Deimos of course, NoahTheTerror -- " Eddie and Noah both pointed at the same empty space, where a link would later go to Noah's Photogram, "and I are both flying first-class for only the second time in our lives. When I traveled with Truly Tasty I was always on the bus because we had a lot of equipment, and Noah used to be a peasant -- "

"I'm still a peasant," Noah said. 

"You're a prince, kiddo."

"I'm a peasant prince," Noah insisted.

"I could kick you back to Economy," Eddie said, grinning at him. 

"Well, princehood has perks," Noah allowed. 

"Anyway," Eddie said, slinging an arm around Noah and ruffling his hair, "the two of us decided to stay up and get into mischief, which is why we're filming at thirty five thousand feet. We were just going to play cards, but we got to comparing notes about airline food, and about five minutes in I said, whoa, this is content, let's not waste it. So, young prince, tell me what you were saying about airline food before we started filming."

Noah nodded. "First class food is okay. It helps that you're eating it in a really fancy seat and you know how much you paid for that fancy seat. But it's still kinda..." he stuck out his tongue, waggling his head. "It's just served in fancier dishes. And outside of first class...I mean, I'll eat it, but I won't like it."

"It's difficult to make good airline food. There are a lot of requirements," Eddie said. "It has to be mass-produced, it has to keep for reasonably long periods of time, some of it has to be reheatable on an airplane, and I don't know if you know this -- I don't know if YOU know this," he added, turning to Noah, "but our tastebuds literally change when we're on an airplane. Something to do with altitude and pressurized cabins. That's why bloody marys are such a popular cocktail. Tomato juice tastes better on an airplane."

"That's nuts," Noah said.

"So do nuts, actually," Eddie told him. "So you end up with some issues. Bread doesn't keep well or reheat well and the texture gets super weird, that's why you don't get good pastry and your bread roll is dry even in first class. Meat is hard to cook at scale or reheat. Sauces tend to separate -- cream sauce is the worst. Vegetables do okay because you can make a whole bunch of salad at once and it'll stay relatively crisp, and protein in sauce is still the most easily reheatable form of food, but stuff like eggs or breakfast meat has to be pretty greasy to reheat well. And then it's just, you know, greasy."

"So, chef, what's the solution?" Noah asked, clearly feeding Eddie a line, grinning as he did so.

"I am so glad you asked," Eddie replied, just as faux-rehearsed. "I managed to weasel two economy-class dinner meals out of the flight attendants -- don't worry, there were spares, nobody went hungry because of this -- and we're going to hack you an airline meal that's both edible and reasonably nutritious. Ready?" 

"Ready!" 

Eddie pulled up a tray table that had been folded flat against the wall, and reached in the other direction to bring two trays of food into the camera's view. "So we've got two meals that each have a salad, a little cup of dressing, a roll with butter, and chocolate bites for dessert. This one is a chicken curry noodle bowl with some mango chutney stir-in over here on the side -- I'm using 'curry' and 'chutney' both very loosely, as does the airline -- and this one is mushroom tortellini in pesto. That's actually pretty good, stuffed pasta does well in this kind of situation and I like a pesto, the bright notes really flare. What's the dressing that comes with the salads, Noah?"

Noah checked one of the little bottles, squinting. "Yogurt dill."

"Pretty good. Probably pretty bland. Oh, we also have salt and pepper. Okay, so what we're going to do is take the worst parts of the meal and add a little bit of the best part and basically make you a two-entree meal that's superior to a single entree with sides. Pop open that bread and give our friends a demo."

Noah tore open the plastic surrounding the bread roll, which was oblong, slightly smaller than a hoagie bun. He tapped it on the tray and it clattered stiffly. He broke off one end and crumbs went everywhere; the inside looked dry when he held it up to the camera.

"This is not a good bread roll," Eddie said. "Butter will make it edible, but we can make it better. We have the technology. We have...the dressing. We're going to just get this bread to a nicer texture by adding some of the dressing..." 

He split the roll with a knife carefully while Noah opened the dressing, then poured a generous dollop onto the bread, spreading it with the knife. "Let that sink in a minute, let's pick out the best lettuce and tomatoes for the sandwich, here we go...all right. You want a spicy chicken curry sandwich or a veggie sandwich?"

"Curry," Noah said. 

"Good call, the dill dressing's going to go nicely with that. All right, we are going to really stir up this chicken in sauce -- it's okay if the noodles get mixed in, that's what we in the biz call texture -- and make sure everything's blended. This mango chutney's going on the other half of the bread to moisten it, and this is -- this is going to get me yelled at by my culinary school teachers," he told Noah, "but we're going to throw that pepper right on the mangos there. It'll add kick to the curry and the hope is that you won't actually get much flavor other than spice. We'll see how it goes. So you got dill dressing with lettuce and tomato, mango chutney with pepper, all that is making the bread nice and soft, and we're going to take some of the chicken curry and slather that right on top." 

Noah used a fork and spoon like tongs to scoop curry onto the roll, sitting open on the plate, and then Eddie closed it carefully. Noah reached for it, but Eddie held up a hand.

"Not yet. Finishing is important," he told the teenager. "You have to let the flavors and textures settle a little, and this is also going to ensure it isn't as messy as it could be to eat, because we're classy assholes."

"Nobody classier," Noah agreed.

"The bread needs time to absorb more liquid. So now we take this paper tray liner and just..." Eddie wrapped the sandwich up in the paper, ignoring where the curry stained it yellow, folded the ends under, and tucked them into a complicated pleat that kept the paper tightly wrapped around the sandwich. "Just let that sit for a second -- if we were actually hacking this meal in economy, now's when you'd eat the rest of the curry, while the sandwich settles. What we're going to do is make a veggie sandwich with this other one. Guess how."

Noah frowned. "Well, there's the other salad, and the dressing, and I guess the pesto..."

"Sure, but where's most of this meal's bulk?"

"The pasta -- are you gonna put tortellini on bread?" Noah asked. 

"Carb on carb can be delicious but we're going to be more delicate than that -- we're going to open up this tortellini and get that awesome mushroom filling out of it and use that like a pate spread," Eddie said.

"Can I change my order? I want the mushroom pesto sandwich," Noah said. Eddie laughed.

"All right, you're the kid, you get your pick. Let's get this tortellini unfolded," he said, and set to work. 

-----

Six hours into their ten hour flight, after Eddie used the first-class wifi to post the video, there was a knock on the door and Gregory put his head in. 

"Hey, you're up!" Eddie said, looking up from his book. Noah gave Gregory a wave from where he was playing video games opposite Eddie. "Am I unbanished from our suite?"

"You are in so much trouble," Gregory said affectionately.

"For what? Noah and I have been super duper quiet, we didn't wake you up or bug Michaelis and Jes or anything."

Gregory held up his phone. "Hacking Bad Airline Food With NoahTheTerror," he read from the screen. 

"That mushroom sandwich was choice," Noah said, without looking up from his game. 

"Curry wasn't bad. Pepper might have been a mistake. I'll workshop it," Eddie said. "Why?"

"Eddie. I love you, but we are literally on a plane owned by a company whose food you just called terrible and hacked so it would be better. Half the internet wants an encore when we get served breakfast, and meanwhile the airline seems torn between promising to upgrade their food offerings and suing you for slander."

"Libel, surely," Eddie said. "I did it in the public record."

"It's libel if it's written down, all you did was talk," Gregory said. "Technically slander."

"Oh, is that all I did?" Eddie asked innocently. 

"I blame you," Gregory said to Noah. "You were supervising."

"I'm an innocent child," Noah said, still not looking up from his game. "Easily led astray. Sounds to me like I came under the sway of a bad influence."

"Anyway it's not libel OR slander if it's true," Eddie said. "They won't sue me, if they do I'll bring one of their awful bread rolls to court and make the judge eat it. Nobody would rule against me after eating one of those."

"The dressing helped, but dressing can only do so much," Noah added loyally. Eddie held his hand out for a fistbump and Noah bumped it, finally setting his game aside.

"Seriously, are we busted?" Eddie asked. "Like, genuinely in trouble busted?"

"Probably not, it's mostly just evidence I can't leave you alone for a minute," Gregory said. 

"Well, the solution to that was to let me keep pestering you in our own two-seat suite and not banish me because you wanted to sleep," Eddie pointed out. 

Gregory opened his mouth to say something, then glanced at Noah and paused. 

"If you'd like to leave Noah to his video games and come back to the suite, we can discuss that where young princeling ears aren't listening," he said finally.

"You can just say Eddie wanted to make out," Noah said. "I'm sixteen, not six."

Gregory rubbed his eyes with one hand. "Eddie?"

Eddie leaned over and planted a kiss on Noah's forehead. "Behave yourself. Hydrate and have a snack before we land."

"Don't do anything I wouldn't do," Noah called as Eddie left, snickering. 

"On a scale of one to ten, how much trouble am I in, honestly?" Eddie asked, following Gregory back into their cabin, which had one chair reclined (covered in blankets that Gregory had turned into some kind of napping nest) and one upright, with Eddie's stuff piled on it. 

"With me, a two. With the airline, probably a five. You might have to do a follow-up," Gregory said. 

"Like, the breakfast follow-up, or like an apology?"

Gregory shuffled aside so Eddie could shift his stuff off the chair and sit -- then settled in his lap comfortably, arms resting on his shoulders.

"Well, I say you double-down and make the breakfast post," he said. "But I am now prepared to distract you with making out, as Noah so charmingly put it, if you're interested."

"Oh, now you've seen my impressive sandwich-making skills you're ready to join the mile-high club?" Eddie asked. 

"That mushroom thing did look kind of good."

Eddie kissed him. "Tell you what, when they do breakfast service I'll use all the butter I saved from the rolls and make you an incredibly mediocre but edible egg sandwich. If I can get more dressing I could probably even make a decent mayo substitute." 

"You can't use my phone for extra lighting," Gregory told him, and Eddie was going to protest, but more interesting things were happening and by the time he remembered to be sullen about it, breakfast was being served. 

[classicanalyzer]

Fallout Series Thoughts and Reflection

"Everyone wants to save the world. They just...disagree on how." Maximus

It's one day until one month since this amazing series was released and I have a lot to talk about Fallout!

A Vault Dweller (Lucy MacLean), a Brotherhood Squire (Maximus), a Ghoul Bounty Hunter (Once a human called Cooper Howard)...and a dog (Dogmeat) travel the Wasteland in pursuit of their goals. In doing so, all four will change the Wasteland for better or worse, and discover more sinister secrets. And as Siggi Wilzig, an Enclave defector, asks Lucy in their first encounter,

"Question is will you still want the same things......when you have become a different animal altogether." Siggi Wilzig

The opening (The End) was perfect. The tension reminds me a lot of TLOU’s opening. We look into the eternal 50s culture United States in the 2070s. Cooper's reaction to the first bomb dropping is just acting perfectly. He at first tries to assure his daughter, Janey, that it's just a fire...only to see the smoke turn into a mushroom cloud. His reaction then just turns into one of pure horror that conveys how this is the end of society. That shot of him and Janey looking at the mushroom cloud and the ignorant American families watching TV says everything. As the rich family hides out in their bunker (the father punching his friend which is a foreshadowing moment of humanity's desperation for self-preservation), we see Cooper and Janey ride on their horse as Lose Angelos is bombarded with the title card popping up (Each episode has a unique variation of the title card based on what's going on).

The show captures the dark comedy and the satire of 50s America, Capitalism, and the Cold War. When Wilzig talked about how the cyanide pill (which tasted like bananas too!) was the most humane product Vault-Tec ever made (it really is), that was Fallout humor alright. We even have a pre-war bit where Sebastion Lesie sold his vocal rights to RobCo for their Mr. Handy bots for around $186 (I know it could be 186 thousand but I love the possibility he only got literally 186 dollars). Another is when the "execution" of Lucy by the inhabitants of Vault 4 which was very elaborate to set up death by beheading... turns out out to be death to the surface (as the Overseer is trying horribly to cut off the rope). A funny meta joke is how the teaser joker poked about Amazon Prime being the company with 2-day shipping in the teaser trailer. Then the show was released 2 days earlier than its stated release date (The show came out on April 10th, 6 PM PST when its original release date was April 12th).

"The future, my friend, is products. You're a product. I'm a product. The end of the world is a product." Sebastian Leslie

The attention to detail in this show is also amazing. In the first episode, the radio mentions the President not present at the White House. That follows the lore of the President moving to the Poseidon Oil Rig. I also love how in Episode 2, Maximus mentions Tidus' Power Armor having Tempered Lining and Lucy brought it up too in Episode 5. In Episode 8, The Ghoul mentioned the weakness of the Power Armor suit just below the chestplate. It further explains why Maximus didn't die to the Ghoul since the Ghoul was trying to aim for that but due to that modification, Maximus was able to survive. They also brought back the hacking mini-game when Norman was hacking into the Overseer's computer.

There's also the question of how to rebuild humanity. Each faction (Vault-Tec, NCR, BoS, Enclave) has its own vision for the Wasteland. Maximus perfectly described the setting perfectly well in his quote at the top.

Lucy’s (Positive Karma) naivety and optimism really show her as the heart of our main trio. Even by the end where she gained a lot of cynicism, it’s still her underneath it. I also appreciate her character so much when she doesn’t follow the “character’s bond with another is broken because they lied” trope. I like how the folks of the Wasteland can't stand Vault Dwellers because of their nativity, self-centered attitude, and how it was really for the rich and privileged who could afford to go to a Vault. However, she proves herself to be an earnest character who truly wants to make the Wasteland a better place, and adapts to survive... but doesn't lose sight of who she is unlike the Ghoul. I cannot wait to see how S2 takes her character. Her relationship with Maximus is also pretty sweet as they both help each other out and bring out the best in each other.

"I just doused an innocent man's face with acid, and I've only been up here two weeks. The wasteland sucks." Lucy MacLean

Maximus’ (Neutral Karma) character development was nice to see. He still has a long way to go but he’s starting to understand what being a “hero” is about rather than just having physical power. A hero knows to sacrifice your desires (The Power Armor) to help others (giving back the fusion core). He wants a life beyond the Brotherhood and is clearly disillusioned with the organization. When his friend thought he killed Moldaver and declared him a Knight, his face tells another story of how he felt about this.

The Ghoul (Evil Karma) may have been a cruel bounty hunter who believes in the worst of the Wasteland...but there are moments of his former self still inside. His taking a liking to Wilzig's dog (whom he eventually named Dogmeat) and granting his Ghoul friend Roger a mercy kill reveals there might be hope for him yet. His former self, Cooper Howard. is nothing like his current self. I love how the show made it clear he was once this human who couldn't initially bring himself to kill someone... even if it was for a movie! Even when he tries to initially deny the evils of Vault-Tec and buys into American Cold War propaganda, it's clear he still values his friends (even if they're supposedly "Communists") and eventually starts to really question what the hell is going on.

"I'm not a Communist, Mr. Howard. That's just a dirty word they use to describe people who aren't insane." Lee Moldaver

The reveal that Vault-Tec was responsible for dropping the first bomb (or at the very least planned to do so) was genuinely one of the most shocking bombshell reveals ever. You feel the nervous breakdown of Howard Cooper as he’s trying to process his own wife advocating this insane genocidal plan. I wonder if the shadow figure overseeing the meeting of the corporations is from the Enclave. I also really love the detail that Mr. House is the only one questioning the logistics and the proposal (Daily note that Mr. House is just as bad as everyone in this room, it's just that he sees less value in causing the end of the world). It shows why he decided to go against this insane conspiracy plan as we see the fruits of his preparations in New Vegas. I also love seeing Frederick Sinclair (Also New Vegas), the owner of the Sierra Madre Casino, Leon Von Felden (Fallout 1), the mad scientist behind the FEV and the Mariposa Military base, and Julia Masters, the chief financial officer of REPCONN Aerospace who sold out the company to RobCo.

"It's a fun idea. There's a lot of earning potential with the end of the world. But we're talking about making a significant investment based on a hypothetical. How can you guarantee results?" Robert House

"By dropping the bomb ourselves." Barbara Howard

Moldaver is no saint (she did let raiders massacre Vault 33 and almost killed Lucy, her friend's daughter), and it shows how far the NCR has sunken to achieve its aims. However, a lot of her actions are based on the horrors and crimes against humanity she witnessed. She wanted to rectify them and give the Wasteland hope, no matter the cost. She had seen her failures to stop the old world from being destroyed, and she would not stop until she could make the Wasteland better, even if that meant the NCR not living to see that better world.

Lucy's quest to rescue her father is like a twisted Fallout 3 narrative where the Lone Wanderer's quest was to find their father. But instead of her father being a scientist who wants to further heal the Wasteland, her father is responsible for destroying one of the most developed nations post-war because they weren't Vault-Tec. It's also implied it might've been out of jealousy since the show hints that Moldaver and Rose MacLean were more than just friends.

The collapse of the NCR was something I knew would happen based on the state of it in NV, but the final nail in the coffin being at the hands of Vault-Tec was something I did not see coming. I love that the last action of the NCR Remnant was to restore Shady Sands's power with the cold-fusion reactor. Even when the NCR is gone, whatever arises from the NCR will not only do the job better but now benefit from infinite energy. This is in comparison to the US government whose last action was to nuke the world and for the Enclave, leave the American populace to die.

The West Coast of the Brotherhood took advantage of the NCR's collapse to reestablish itself and with the help of the East Coast's BoS, they're now the largest military presence in California. The final battle between them and the NCR Remnant is a mirror foil to an event mentioned in New Vegas with the Helios Power Plant. We see how Maximus grows disillusioned with how far the organization has fallen and its own Knights not being the heroes he looked up to, even his superior agrees about how the Brotherhood is not what it once was.

Vaults 31-33 may not have an extreme experiment as the other Vaults and in this case, Vault 4, but the experiment is still horrifying. Vault 32-33 are meant to be breeding pools for Vault 31, full of Vault-Tec personnel in cryogenic pods (which I think is how maybe Lee Moldaver survived), to create the "best" Vault-Tec personnel. Vault 4 is a vault where scientists govern the people...which went as well as you might expect (The experiments going berserk and the Vault Dwellers revolting). I also love how the Gulper we saw in Episode 4 is one of Vault 4's experiments (also explaining the human-like finders inside its mouth) and who also ate the Overseer. I wonder what Norman will do given how Bud puts in him a seemingly impossible situation.

Then there's the Enclave and the pre-war Corporations. The Enclave really only shows up for a flashback sequence for Wilzig but, interestingly, the show glosses over them. What interests me the most is that Wilzig knows about the Vaults 31-33 experiment and Lucy's full name. Obviously, the Enclave still has observations of the Vaults, but as I mentioned before, that shadow figure observing the corporate meeting might be them. Speaking of the Corporations, we see the results of unchecked Capitalism with no regulations in this franchise and this show. We see the insane troll logic that these mega corporations will win the "great game of capitalism" by outliving everyone. Mega corporations have no logic other than their insane troll logic that what matters is they survive regardless of who suffers or dies in the name of profits.

"So, the U.S. government has outsourced the survival of the human race to Vault-Tec. Vault-Tec is a private corporation that has a fiduciary responsibility to make money for its investors. And how does it make money? By selling vaults... The cattle ranchers are in charge, Coop." Charlie Whiteknife.

You can tell how much Nolan and his team love Fallout by the work they put into this show. They did such an amazing job that Tim Cain, one of the OG creators of Fallout, praised the hell out of this show for bringing Fallout to life. I cannot wait to see what S2 will bring us.

"War never changes." Barbara Howard and The Ghoul

[johaerys-writes]

Chapter 2: i'd like to mean it when i say i'm over you

Read on AO3 | Read from the beginning

Patroclus wakes up to darkness again. The sky is a thick, smokey grey beyond the tall windows, interrupted by the tiny occasionally blinking lights of the skyscrapers and the moon that reflects on the surface of the sea in the distance. 

He pushes himself up with a sigh, rubbing the crick in the back of his neck that the couch left him with. Achilles is still sleeping soundly in the bed, obviously much less affected by jetlag than Patroclus is, unused to travelling as he is. 

His gentle breathing is the only sound in the room other than the hum of the air con just at the edges of his hearing. He is illuminated by the distant glow of the buildings nearby, and Patroclus studies the way his chest rises and falls with each breath. In this moment, still suspended between sleep and wakefulness, nothing feels real. Them being here together doesn’t feel real, Achilles sleeping only a few feet away from him doesn’t feel real. In the past year, Patroclus has spent so many sleepless nights wishing Achilles were right there next to him, and berating himself that he did, that this all still feels like a figment of his imagination, a drawn out anxiety-induced dream. 

Patroclus gets up quietly, as quietly as he can, and searches in the dark for his clothes. 

The hotel gym is empty at this time of day—or, perhaps, night. It isn’t day yet by any stretch of the imagination. Patroclus warms up on the treadmill for a bit, flicking through the international channels on the TV in front of him, then sweats out some of his unease and pre-conference jitters on the weight machines. By the time he finishes his workout, the sky is tinted a muted, greyish sort of purple, and the hotel lobby is waking up with activity. Patroclus pats his face and his neck with a towel and takes a big swig from his water bottle as he takes the elevator back to his room. 

When he walks into the room, Achilles is already up, sitting at the table before the laptop.  

Patroclus’ laptop.

“What the fuck—” Patroclus reaches the table with a couple of quick strides. He snaps the laptop shut and cradles it protectively against his chest. “What the fuck are you doing?”

“I just took a peek, that’s all!” Achilles holds his hands up in a placating gesture, but Patroclus knows him well enough to know he isn’t guilty of his actions in the slightest. “You’ve been so weird and cagey about everything that I simply had to check it out. Can’t blame a guy for being curious.” 

“This is private,” Patroclus snaps at him. “Do you even know what private means? It’s password protected for a reason! You can’t just—hack your way into anything you want!” 

Achilles breathes out an amused chuckle. “I’d hardly call that ‘hacking’. It really wasn’t hard to guess what the password was.” He tilts his head to the side with a small kitten smile. “Especially since it’s my birthday.”

Patroclus glowers at him, his face growing uncomfortably hot. He knows it’s stupid and naive of him to have the same password for pretty much all his accounts and devices, especially if it’s the same password he’s had for years ever since he and Achilles set up their first email accounts together when they were like, thirteen.

“Why do you still have my birthday as your password, Pat?” Achilles asks, his voice a velvet purr. “Is it because you’ve missed me? Can't bear to be without me?”

He leans back in the chair, his lips curling in a smug smile. His eyes are still a little puffy with sleep, a faint imprint of the pillow on his cheek, and he’s still the most beautiful thing Patroclus has gazed upon today, or possibly in his life. 

Infuriating, that. 

“Stay the fuck away from my laptop,” he growls, jabbing at the air with his finger. “If I see you anywhere near it again, I’m kicking you out of this room. And I don’t care if you’ll have to sleep in the streets for the rest of the week. Do you hear me?” 

Achilles’ knowing smirk doesn’t fade, and that spikes Patroclus’ temper even more. He jerkily shoves the laptop in its case, then slams the bathroom door closed behind him before hopping in the shower. 

If he doesn’t throttle Achilles by the end of the week, he’ll consider it a miracle.

 Read the rest on AO3

[sighthounds-and-sketches]

Let's talk about flying to pick up a puppy by yourself

And some ways to make it easier on you.

Your prep starts honestly, about a week before baby actually comes home. Maybe 2 weeks.

For my pre-flight prep, I first picked out a flight carrier. I went with the one my breeder recommended.

It has expandable sides, and a little storage pocket. And it's resistant to chewing. I'm really glad I didn't buy a cheaper one, and I can't stress enough that it's cheaper to buy a quality one the first time than have a zipper break or a tear in the middle of your trip. My trip in total was 4 flights and 4 hours in the car, with him being with me for half of it and having the longest layover of my day. I could only really let him out a couple times, so this next part was incredibly helpful.

I mailed the carrier to my breeder,

at her behest. This was *huge* because the siblings got their scent on it and he was acclimated to being in it before I got to him. It acted as a secure place for him to ride in the car and for his first few nights here, he slept in there through the night.

And now that he's in his crate, the removable pad with scents on it has been instrumental in establishing the crate as a safe place for him.

Video of why I'm really glad I got the durable carrier.

Please consider what you're wearing that day.

Wear clothes you don't need to fuss with *at all* that's normal airport protocol- but I can't stress this enough, you're carrying the puppy in your arms through the TSA checkpoint and other people will be fussing over him. Make sure your appearance and personal bag is no fuss.

See: jeans, hoodie, puppy treat and potty bag that can be shoved into my personal Item, and a no fuss backpack.

In my personal travel bag I kept:

Pee pads, his food from the breeder, a change of clothes in case of incidents, a portable battery to charge my phone, collapsible food and water bowls, collar and leash incase one wasn't provided, and SEVERAL toys in there.

The toys were great for waiting in the terminal. I'd expand the sides of the crate and introduce a new toy to him to help him run a bit of energy out before we had to board.

Peepads: Even though airports have animal relief areas, chances are they're either kind of gross or your dog may be a little too young for it to be safe. I was traveling through one of the busiest airports in the world, and nobody was checking jack shit so I opted for potty breaks to occur in bathrooms with pee pads. He didn't end up going but it's better to be prepared.

I flew Delta and used Skymiles accumulated from our credit card with them that we pay off monthly, so the only thing I paid for out of pocket was 95.00 to bring Argos on board. My flight only costed 20k miles total, and that was only a small portion of what we'd accumulated over the 6 months we've been using the card. I think it's worth considering if you're planning to fly to a breeder. It enabled me to go anywhere in the country that Delta flies and not worry about costs.

Day of hack: double check your flights on the airlines app and switch your seat if possible. I swapped one of my return flight seats to an empty row for 15.00, which meant I could have my carryon and him with me at the same time and that was very nice for readjusting where my stuff was and taking a damn nap. Because at this point, I'd been up for about 18 hours and still had 7 hours of traveling before I'd get home.

I think my last thing is that if you're like me and you do have an invisible disability- ask if you can preboard. Dont be afraid to say "hey, i have this problem and standing in the heat while carrying a bunch of stuff is potentially going to cause an episode. " The employees were extremely nice, and willing to work with me. Ultimately, I went through all of this because he's a service dog prospect and will hopefully help.

Small things for me specifically prior: ate in the morning and right before I picked him up, he was able to chill in his carrier while I ate dinner at a restaurant in the airport- didn't make any sounds. He slept the whole time. I don't think I couldve eaten in the food court, too much to carry between him and my main bag.

I think that's it. I may add to this if I remember anything I forgot.

Edited to add: for my besties with miscellaneous illnesses-

A baggie with your medicines is IMPORTANT. Do not forget some dramamine, advil, Tylenol, whatever, pack it if there's a small chance you'll need it!

I ended up getting migraine symptoms like 5 hours into travel, and that was not a day I could afford to have blurred vision. <3 remember to take care of YOU on the journey.

[yennefer-of-vengerbergs]

FUN FACTS ABOUT YOUR TAV!

Thank you for the tag @bhaal-battle-beer-bard 💖

I will absolutely take any and all opportunities to babble about my girl Syanna 💖

~Is your character good, evil, or neutral (makes some good decisions, some bad ones)?

She ends up being chaotic good by the end of her story but she does start out being more on the neutral side, being much more practical and wanting to help herself first (it's how she justifies picking up the other companions, why she gets involved in the goblin fight outside of the Emerald Grove and so on), but along the way, she actually finds out she doesn't mind doing good things, and that she actually likes being capable of kindness (pretty much the whole premise of my longfic)

Pre-tadpole though? Definitely on the evil side.

~What hobbies do they partake in?

She tries out a lot of stuff, especially post-game. It's one of her ways of finding out who she is and what she likes, so she'll pick up any and all hobbies she can think of, and sees what sticks.

She likes reading, especially mystery and adventure books (it's also a hobby that she and Astarion share - a lot of times, during and post-game, they actually cuddle and read together, either each of them with their own book, or they share one and end up bickering about how one or the other should read faster if they don't want the other to turn the page before they finish reading).

Then, there's playing with Scratch and the owlbear cub (she loves them both so much, your honor 💖)

Another thing she likes doing is trying to find other ways to use her magic, be it just for fun, or for whatever would make her day to day life easier (like using mage hands to do her hair while she does something else, a fire spell to keep the water in the bathtub warm; basically, the faerun equivalent of life hacks).

Also, cuddling with Astarion, because obviously.

As for the failed ones, she tries to pick up cooking post-game, but finds out she is horrendous at it and that she doesn't enjoy it at all anyway. She also tried to get into more artistic hobbies. As it turns out, she can, at most, draw stick figures, and trying to learn to play an instrument would require someone to actually teach her how to do it, if she wants it to sound better than painful, out of tune squeaks or like nails on a chalkboard.

~Do they own any heirlooms from their family or ancestors?

Do the urges count?

She does get rid of those by rejecting Bhaal though, so maybe not 😅

~ Can your character cook?

Absolutely not😂Besides, she doesn't like doing it, so most of the times, for herself, she prefers to just buy something already made from whatever inn she and Astarion are staying at during their travels, or from a market (or Astarion ends up stealing it for her).

~Does your character have a best friend?

Karlach and Jaheira 😁

She immediately got along with Karlach and they became fast friends, with Syanna appreciating the fact that Karlach was more supportive, more understanding of her after finding out what happened to Alfira, which Syanna ends up telling her about (in my runs it's always happened that way, I get the Alfira scene before recruiting Karlach). There's a lot of support and understanding and friendship there, both of them think of the other as a sister, so it's unsurprisingly bad when it's found that Syanna is a bhaalspawn and was also behind the Absolute plot. But the worst part for Karlach is by far how she used to be allied with Gortash, which feels like a huge betrayal in the moment and drives a wedge between them both for a good while. They do make up in the end though and their friendship is absolutely stronger afterwards. And you would not believe how much time they spend together at the reunion party catching up and just how happy Syanna is when she hears that Karlach and Wyll might be able to find a way for Karlach's engine to be fixed ❤️

With Jaheira, they're both sarcastic little shits with each other from the start, but they also end up getting along. Jaheira does begin to think that something is off about Syanna at one point and eventually begins to suspect that she might be a bhaalspawn, judging by how she acts and everything going on with her (which leads to the scene in early act 3 where she confronts her about it). And although she is worried about what that means, she does also notice how Syanna struggles with everything, so she keeps an eye on her and is there for her and eventually becomes somewhat of a mother figure for her too (and I just love it when you get to good enough approval with her that she starts calling you 'cub' 🥹)

~Their biggest fear?

Her more unusual fear (to others, but understandable, given her circumstances) would be losing her memories again, especially after finally making new, happy ones alongside Astarion - she'd hate even the thought of not remembering her life with him. Other than that, she spends a good chunk of the game events afraid of being abandoned/alone.

An example of that is when, the closer they get to Baldur's Gate, things between her and Astarion start to get tense, because he's obviously worried about confronting Cazador and thinks about the ritual and wanting to complete it himself; Syanna isn't so sure about it and tries to reason with him but it ends up being the subject of several arguments between them, which only make her worry that it might end up being what drives them apart. Then add in all the durge revelations that happen shortly after, and she is not having a great time - most of the companions take the news poorly and she ends up just fearing they will all turn their backs on her, despite everything they've been through and how she no longer wanted anything to do with her old life (which is another thing I want to write about in my fic).

~Name one of their red flags.

Well, she did use to be the leader of the cult of Bhaal so...🫣

No pressure tags: @iizven @ratchsellsfornax @mercymaker @casualya @zyana-wyvern

[irregularjohnnywiggins]

So, since apparently I'm in a DC posting mood right now, you all want to hear this concept that's been baking in my mind for a while now?

Stephanie Brown is the same level of crimefighter as Bruce Wayne. Hear me out.

First, a common thematic reading of the Batfamily, especially the Batkids, is that all of them are in some way better than Bruce at one specific thing. Like with the equally broad thematic reading of 'All of Batman's rogues reflect a part of his psyche' this doesn't entirely hold up to scrutiny and doesn't apply to all of the Batkids, but it applies to enough: Dick is the better leader, Babs is the better strategist, Tim is the better detective, Cass is the better fighter, you get the idea. Now, normally when considering this reading the consensus for Steph is that she is the negative archetype, similar to how the Joker is interpreted in the rogues reading - an inverse of the common rule, in this case meaning that Steph isn't particularly good at anything. Some people who take this reading end this part with 'And that's why I love her!' - most don't. But I think that's entirely wrong, and to explain why we need to examine Bruce's own past.

In most versions of the Batman origin, there's a period, usually immediately or closely after Bruce graduating from either high-school or college, where Bruce travels the world, seeking masters of specific disciplines and learning all he can from them. The amount of people he meets is extensive - seriously, I have a word doc of 40 names and that's not even all of them - and later stories, particularly the Nolan trilogy, Batman/The Shadow, and IIRC Batman: Earth One, try to par that down to a single entity - The League of Shadows, The Shadow, and Alfred, respectively - teaching him all that is necessary to become Batman. It's not a change I particularly like, for one simple reason - the trek around the globe is as much metatexual as it is backstory. Like many of the prototypical superheroes, Batman isn't just one thing, he's many influences that Bill Finger brought to the table when creating him - he's a pulp hero like the Shadow, an adventure swashbuckler like Zorro and the Scarlet Pimpernel, a detective like Sherlock Holmes, all melding together to form our concept of 'Batman'. Having him learn from all these disparate sources - from ninjas and car thieves and magicians and detectives - seems like a way of acknowledging that breadth of influence, and I can't help but feel like limiting it to only Ra's or Lamont or Alfred takes away from that.

So, what does all that have to do with Stephanie Brown? Well, think about it - almost all of the Batfamily have only one real mentor - there are exceptions, like Tim basically becoming Babs' apprentice in No Man's Land and Cass' very funny shared custody situation, but mainly all of the Batkids learn from Batman, and what they excel at they were just kind of naturally good at anyway - Babs and Cass especially, no shade. With Steph, though? It's not as impressive as Bruce's list, but she learns general Cowl skills with Bruce, hacking and cryptography with Babs, detective skills with Tim, get fighting tips from Cass and Black Canary, is taught teamwork by Kate, evasion skills with Damian (that last one may not be purposeful), plus whatever else she can learn because, unlike the rest of the Batfamily, at least Pre-Flashpoint Steph was always learning.

True, Steph started out with very few practical skills in crimefighting, but you know who else did that? Bruce - every single time a comic or adaptation has shown him attempting to fight crime before the training trek has him absolutely suck at it. At the very least Steph never decided to stop her dad by attempting to assassinate him in a courthouse full of witnesses by veeery slowly pointing a gun at him, like Nolanverse Bruce.

Bottom line? If one more person says Steph 'isn't particularly skilled at anything', I will chew glass.

[raccoonfallsharder]

here are a few sneak previews of what we’ve got going on (this is really more to organize my thoughts and force myself to come up with titles than anything else)

upcoming rocket raccoon fics behind the cut

1. Window Across the Galaxy

aka long&angsty. hoping to start posting on Sunday or Monday.

Slooowww burn + eventual smut. elements of hurt/comfort because rocket is the saddest-angriest boy. Slight AU starting pre-GOTG volume 1 (but will hit most of the same major plot points).

Rocket is captured by a Ravager crew hoping to get rich off the excessively large bounty on his head. Throwing a wrench in everyone’s plans is the Terran girl they hired to do some freelance assessing on a recent haul of goods they’ve seized from a Xandaran luxury liner. Oops.

She looks at the rusted bars, and back to her brute of a tour guide, and sighs heavily. Slowly, she turns back to the cage, swaying toward the bars so she can peer in at eye-level. She’s immediately face-to-face with the creature. His ears are still pressed flat against his head, fur bristling, and he’s gazing back, clearly suspicious and probably - justifiably - feeling more than a little bit mean. She’s suddenly certain that if she got close enough, he’d take out her eyes. There’s no helping herself, is there? One corner of her mouth twists up in exhausted resignation and she nods. “Welp,” she says solemnly to the raccoon, “fuck me, my dude.”

2. Blackmail Material

(codename: pwp???). will probably post part 1 in a week or two.

just pure fucking smut. this was gonna be two parts but I'm leaning toward three now (smut // fuff // smut). probably takes place sometime after endgame but before volume 3? not that it really matters tbh because there is NO FUCKIN PLOT HERE. ur girl's got a praise kink so that'll definitely be featured per usual.

basically: rocket finds your vibrator.

“I’ll tell you what,” he offers up, still grinning that shit-eating grin. “I won’t say a word and I’ll give it back to you. You can even keep whatever batteries are in it.” That sounds too good to be true. You raise a brow and cross your arms in front of your breasts. “If?" “If you let me watch you use it,” he challenges, eyes daring you. “For science.”

3. Domestic Scenes in Space Travel

(codename: ok sweatshirt girl.) i dunno -maybe post the first one by mid-august?

Comics-inspired but not exclusive - just a buncha feel-good fuffy one-shots and equally feel-good smutty one-shots. Series of slice-of-life readerxrocket one-shots following The Very Boring Adventures of Space Pilot & Sweatshirt Girl.

“Just try not to push any buttons or pull any levers till you know what they do.” You snort. “I fully intend to keep my hands completely to myself unless I have your explicit permission to touch.” Rocket leers. “That could be fun.” Your eyes narrow. “Space Pilot, I’m gonna need you to focus on the task at hand so I don’t end up accidentally jettisoning us.”

4. Other Duties As Assigned

(codename: schemers, dreamers, & multicalendar memers) i don't have an intended outcome for this fic yet so while i am VERY much enjoying it, i first need to grapple with whether or not i'm okay posting something that may be unfinished. i usually try to avoid that.

I have no idea whether this will get smutty or not (probably, knowing me?). Begins five months after The Snap.

Natasha Romanoff is an administrative nightmare - a fact that does not go unnoticed by the (interim) captain of the Milano. First she demands that the remaining two Guardians of the Galaxy be reachable via a primitive Terran messaging system, and then she can't be bothered to read the frickin' emails.

Thank fuck she's hired a new assistant.

**THIS MESSAGE IS ENCRYPTED** To: <nromanoff@aee.org> From: &lt;rocket@aee.org> Subj: re: WHAT THE FUCK RED Date: Monday, September 24, 2018 7:34am well that’s probably the nicest message I’ve gotten since I hacked the internet I’m gonna have to kill your boss though

(a super-secret spoiler sidenote - i have a formula and I shamelessly overuse it, so there are no surprises here: girl falls first, raccoons falls harder. every fuckin time friends.)

[reignof-fyre]

Colonizers impose their own cultural values, religions, and laws, making policies that do not favour the Indigenous Peoples. They seize land and control the access to resources and trade. As a result, the Indigenous people become dependent on colonizers.

Settler colonialization either rules as a minority group through oppression and assimilation of the indigenous peoples or by establishing themself as the demographic majority through driving away, disadvantaging, or outright killing the indigenous people.

Oh, I see...

The First Men came with bronze swords and great leathern shields, riding horses. As the men settled in the new land, carving out holdfasts and farms, they chopped down and burned the carved weirwoods that were sacred to the gods of the children of the forest. This provoked wars between the children and the First Men. Though the children fought with their greenseers, magic, and wood dancers, the First Men were larger, stronger, and more technologically advanced. The First Men cut down weirwoods as they believed that the greenseers could see through the eyes of the trees.

Hm

Brandon of the Bloody Blade is a legendary son of Garth Greenhand. He is credited with driving giants away from the Reach and warring against children of the forest, slaying so many at Blue Lake that it became known as Red Lake. In some tales, he is mentioned as the ancestor or father of Bran the Builder, making him a possible ancestor of House Stark.

Oh...

Andals first landed in the Fingers and attacked the First Men living in the Vale. They burnt out the weirwood groves, hacked down the faces, and slaughtered the children of the forest that they came across. Everywhere, they proclaimed the triumph of the Seven over the old gods. A hill, now known to the Westerosi as High Heart, was sacred to the children of the forest. There, the Andal king Erreg the Kinslayer cut down the children’s grove of thirty-one weirwoods. It is said that the First Men killed half of the children of the forest with bronze blades, and the Andals finished the job with iron

Interesting....

The Westeros of Aegon's youth was divided into seven quarrelsome kingdoms, and there was hardly a time when two or three of these kingdoms were not at war with one another. [Fire & Blood]

Aegon the Conqueror brought fire and blood to Westeros, but afterward, he gave them peace, prosperity, and justice

Aegon's first established law was the King's Peace, which forbid conflict in the realm without the leave of the Iron Throne. Aegon treated the defeated lords with respect and allowed each region to retain its own laws and customs and for the lords to retain both the right of pit and gallows and the first night. Aegon often travelled the realm with six maesters who educated him on each region's local customs and history.

...Aegon ignored the suggestions of making the ironborn vassals to the Tullys of Riverrun or the Lannisters of Casterly Rock, as well as the suggestion to exterminate the ironborn by dragonflame. Instead, Aegon allowed the ironborn to name their own lord paramount, for which the ironborn chose Vickon Greyjoy as Lord of the Iron Islands.

The remaining twenty-four years of Aegon's reign were peaceful, so much that the last two decades of his reign were later called the Dragon's Peace by the maesters of the Citadel. He spent much of his time consolidating his power by travelling throughout the Seven Kingdoms and building his capital at King's Landing.

Oh, really.

If the Valyrian's truly were the colonisers many in the fandom claim they are, Westeros would be extremely different.

For one, the predominant faith would be the Old Gods of Valyria, and the Faith of the Seven and the old gods of the north & children wouldn't exist. People would be forced to intermarry siblings/relatives and perhaps even keep slaves according to pre-Doom Valyria (even though the Targaryens stopped slavery once they left Valyria) or forced to marry Valyrian people to dilute their First Men or Andal blood so, eventually, most great houses were mostly Valyrian.

Temples dedicated to the Fourteen Flames would be built, dozens of dragons hatched and left to roam freely and hunt as they please, blood magic and sorcerers aplenty.

The Valyrians didn't do any of that. Aegon I ensured that the separate Kingdoms kept their culture and traditions and respected the Faith. It even says that many Targaryens gave up their faith in the Old Valyrian Gods (or so they say) to worship the Faith of the Seven or Old Gods of Westeros.

Tl;dr; the first men and andals colonized westeros to suit them, slaughtering the natives (children of the forest and giants) and the Targaryens (Valyrians) indeed conquered westeros but respected the land and people and only brought their ways of dragon riding and incestuous marriages who hurt no one :)

And also all the Targaryen's since Daenys's children's era were born on Westetosi soil, Dragonstone/Kings Landing, and thus were in actual fact westerosi but culturally and ethnically Valyrian.

[scary-lasagna]

I was re-reading the slender beings lore and I’m honestly surprised Mother wouldn’t arrange a forced marriage with Slender but just for the sake of this ask how would the other 3 brothers react to Slender being forced to marry someone so their mother wouldn’t die

can't remember if i ever posted the lore for Mother and Slender's father. Mother was being forced into an arranged marriage but met Slender's father and they ran off together and i think that's beautiful ngl <3 But due to this, she wouldn't force him, if anything he's forcing himself out of guilt and fear.

Slender Brothers

Slender would try his best to keep up the facade of enjoying himself on the daily of this new relationship. But in reality, there was no way in hell did he truly love this poor woman who was shrouded by his charades.

She was just in love with the idea of being in love with such a stature as Slender was in the Underrealm, it was basically marrying into royalty.

And as long as he was more powerful than her, the offspring would amount to a Slenderbeing with some underlying traits of her demonic blood.

Splendor and Trender held Slender in the highest respect of happiness. They never thought he would find someone that he truly loved and wanted to settle down with. Let alone move away from the manor completely.

But Offender, he could tell something was off. Afterall, this is his area of specialty.

It's just too strange how quickly Slender took to this woman, how quickly he was willing to sacrifice everything he has built to be with her, and especially how he's always so hesitant to touch and kiss her in front of others.

Offender would pull him aside, and as gently as he could, ask Slender if he truly loved his woman.

And of course, Slender would scoff, and shove his brother to the side in fake offense, but the younger caught his wrist.

The weight of everything proved too much, and Slender confessed every single thought plaguing his brain, which seemed to be falling apart at the seems.

"If you tell anyone, you will never see anyone here again, do you understand? Especially Mother, she must not know. Ever."

"You'll know I'll easily break that if it means you'll be happy, Slender."

"I cannot be happy when my own mother is dying because of something I am failing at." He raises his head, a darkening gaze settled upon his taunt jawline and stressed skin.

"She'd be happier dying than you marry off to someone you didn't love. Don't you remember the story of your father and her meeting? Only days before the wedding and they ran off together from the rehearsal dinner. It would go against everything she's ever taught us."

"I will suffer if it means that she'll live to see me truly find someone else."

"Like Hell you will." The tall woman roughly opened the door, and the two brother stood quickly, a quiver awakening from their childhood travelling down their spine. Her crutch clicked against the wood, and Mother beelined toward Slender despite her limp. "You tell that poor girl that the wedding is called off. And you will make up a damn good excuse for breaking her heart, too." She paused to, what sounded like, hacking up part of a lung.

"Mother, I can't-"

"Yes you will, Slender, damn you!" Mother had always exhibited tough-love, but never a shrieking angry like this. The curse had started to spread to her bones, her back, and more importantly her brain. Odd things sprung up that she's never done before. She burnt food, she left the house half-dressed, and kept asking where Sol had gone, a proxy that has long been gone from existence.

"You will do as I say, exactly how I say it, even if it's just this once." She turned, and Slender sadly realized she was only wearing one heel, which did not aid her already pre-existing limp.

"If I come back here tomorrow, and the girl isn't gone, I will do it myself, my own way." The threat lingered even after she left from the room, her one heel clicking down the stairs.

It didn't matter, she would forget in a few hours, anyway.

[candycryptids]

17.out of all the scions, which one is the one your wol gets along with the best? what about the one they get along with the least? why?

20.what is your wol's best quality? what's the thing that they do that really gets stuff done of makes people like them? hard mode: their own perception vs. a friend or partner's perception.

both for Chuu!

Of the Scions….. 🤔 that’s toughies ! I think she tolerates Estinien’s presence the most since he lets her alone. But I don’t know if he counts- by EW he’s on payroll, but the second choice I have is Thancred for similar reasons- she’s not super sociable for crowds of people and they’re the most likely to break off from the crowd for similar reasons so it’s easy to just be people-watchers on the fringes. (Though I imagine Thancred is just taking ‘breathers’ and gets back in there after a few minutes).

In the Universe where she is THE warrior o light her favorite is Y’shtola though. There’s something really satisfying about her trust in you to back up her batshit plans that coincides with Chuu’s own batshit plans. Hack it until it works and failing that? blow it up so it’s not a problem anymore. EZ. (She also actually gets on quite well with Tataru, a friendly and smiling face she can count on to be there when she comes back from whatever armpit mission and pour her some tea while she bitches about the heat, the fight, the petty politics.)

She has the most trouble getting on with Alphinaud. In the Chuu Is The Wol-iverse she carries a sore spot for the Crystal Braves and using pocket change to partially fund a personal army- but she recognizes that it’s largely a case of. Being a child with too much accolades and praise and expectations heaped on his shoulders to the point where he keeps rising to it without so much the experience to match? It reminds her of somebody. …. In non-WoL usual canon though she has trouble getting on with Tataru PURELY because she knows how to find her and WILL call her if they need her help. She’s one of four people trusted with her linkpearl connection and it took some heavy convincing for that much.

FOR THE SECOND QUESTION, THOUGH,

Chuu sees herself as The Guy you see when a technical thing is giving you trouble, or if you want to rig your manacutter to go far and beyond the safe speed because you and your Miqo’te traveling companion want to recreate pod racing through Azys La. Her assistance was crucial in the building of that weird machine to go through all of that Allagan Research. Not that she makes it terribly easy to get in touch… but she believes her best quality is being The Expert™ that you call in when you’ve exhausted all your other options and she gets to step into the scene and Fix It. And then vanish again, crucially, she does not want to keep the spotlight.

My wrist is acting all kinds of unkind so writing a bunch more is giving me trouble but I’ll tell you Nero’s perception of her is that she’s a One-Upping, Show-Offing Arrogant Pain In His Ass, who is specifically showing up whenever he’s trying to look like a competent authority on whatever they’re dealing with just to dump a milkshake in his lap and make him look stupid.

Because she is. It is her passion in life to make Nero look stupid as hell.

[Pre-DT ?’s prompt!]