#pre romantic roceit

[lily-janus]

Someone Like You

Hello everyone! This has been a little bit overdue heh but I'm finally ready to start posting for @tsspromptmonth ! The first few chapters are still not the parts I wrote but the wonderful parts @prince-rowan-of-the-forest wrote! So give them credit for those! I'll be posting a chapter every week, if anyone would like me to tag them to get notified feel free to reach out in the asks or dms^^

Chapter one | next

Summary: after you get into an accident that leaves you with chronic pain and partial blindness and causes you to get bullied and laughed at at school and the only friend you ever had ditches you for the pupolar friend group, you kinda don't really feel like connecting with anyone anymore... even if you do have a crush on them. So, of course, now you're forced to work with them on a project for English class... what could possibly go wrong?

Pairings: pre romantic Roceit, platonic LAMP

Warnings: bullying, public humiliation, unsympathetic Janus (kinda? He's being mean a lot but it's kinda understandable), misunderstandings, self degrading thoughts, chronic pain, partial blindness, trying to hide your disability, lying, low self esteem, unrequired love(for now), swearing. I think that's it but let me know if I missed anything.

Word count: 2,898

Growing up, Janus had always been different. He liked to hide in the shadows, he lied far more often than was necessary, to the point where the people who knew him knew to take most things he said to mean the opposite, when he wasn’t lying he was either too shy to speak or rude to anyone who bothered trying.

And of course, there was a massive scar across half of his face. Yeah, that was a pretty big one. He’d gotten it during the car accident that killed his mother when he was very young, since then he’d been blind in one eye and had bad vision in the other, his habit of lying had gotten even worse and he often felt terrible pains in his left limbs which the doctor had said may be chronic and probably wouldn’t go away any time soon and no matter how many physio sessions he attended or meds he took the pains never really seemed to leave him alone.

Whenever he went outside people always seemed to stare, odd looks seemed to follow him wherever he went, sympathy was the best he could hope for, pity was the most common, disgust he’d come to expect, hatred towards him just for existing was something he’d gotten used to over the years.

Now, ten years since the accident, he’d gotten used to everything that came from being different. The stares in the school hallways when he used his cane, the angry looks when he bumped into someone on the street, not realising that they were as close as they were, usually when they were on his blind side.

He got angry look after angry look from his teachers when he lied time and time again. The exasperated look his therapist always gave him when he’d come back every week only to report little progress as always.

Unfortunately, now that he was older, a junior in highschool, he was starting to realise there were a few more issues than just the looks and the lies. At the age of seventeen Janus started to notice things. He noticed the two seniors walking arm in arm down the hall. He accidentally walked in on two of his classmates doing the devil’s tango in the bathroom more than once (which had immediately made it onto his short list of reasons he wished he was fully blind, possibly deaf too). He noticed his classmates passing notes in the seats in front of him, the notes adorned with little hearts or smiley faces which made the receiver blush and turn away with a silent giggle.

The romance was everywhere now when it hadn’t been so prominent before, and like a lot of other kids his age, Janus was starting to want it too. The issue he faced was… well who would ever love him?

Of course it was easy to notice the beautiful girls and even more beautiful boys getting together, it was in plain sight, like everyone had suddenly decided to pair off. But he also noticed the kids who didn’t meet society's strict (and stupid, in Janus’ humble opinion) standards for beauty. The girl with acne, the boy who was slightly overweight, the trans girl in his class who hadn’t been able to transition quite yet, the girl who liked to have her hair short and clothes baggy just because. None of those people had been able to pair off, whether they wanted to or not, they sat alone at lunch and in class, they didn’t get invited to parties or get partners for dances.

Janus noticed all this because he was one of those people too. The popular kids would fling insults and slurs at him like he was a witch in a medieval stoning, they would point at him discreetly in the halls and laugh. They'd throw paper balls at the back of his head in class. He'd even been pummelled by a basketball once because kids really didn't know when to stop. He’d had his lunch smacked from his hands, he’d been shoved and pushed and kicked while he was down. Janus knew what it was like, and he knew his crowd.

Unfortunately, that didn’t mean his heart would obey him and stick to that crowd.

Because Janus found his eye wandering in class, he couldn’t help the way he was drawn in, like iron to a magnet, and he hated it. He despised the feeling so deeply, because it made him want. It made him want for something he was sure he could never hope to have.

Roman was somehow both a prep and a jock, a theatre kid who always seemed to be the centre of attention in whatever situation he found himself in. Roman was the prime example of the people who bullied him. If someone asked Janus to point out the kind of person who made fun of him in the corridors, he’d tell them ‘people like Roman’ because there he was, strutting down the middle of the corridor with his friends, wearing his custom varsity jacket (with a golden crown and his last name- Prince- printed on the back in gold). They would walk past and people would get out of the way, they would walk into a class and everyone would stare, but never in the same way they stared at him.

Roman might be the prime example of one of his bullies, but funnily enough Roman himself had never done anything to him. At least not in person. Janus had no way of knowing what was said behind his back (a lot was said behind his back) but he did know that Roman had never been the one to throw the basketball, Roman had never shoved him out of the way, he’d never tripped him or smacked his lunch to the floor. In fact, Roman had never interacted with him at all.

And yet for some reason, Janus’ heart longed for him, that glittery eyeshadow, those bright green eyes, his brown hair that seemed to shine red and gold in the light. But despite his own wants he knew it wouldn't happen, he wouldn't even attempt to lie to himself, there was no hope for him.

If anyone asked, which they never did, Janus would say he despised the other boy. Hated the way he leant back on his chair during English class without a care in the world. He would say he hated the way he could hear Roman's melodic laugh over the cacophony of the cafeteria. The way his eye was always drawn to the guy when he acted so perfectly in their drama class. Hated the way Roman’s hair shone shades of rust and gold and brown in the sun, hated the way his green eyes reminded him of a forest in the summer, hated the way he was able to speak loud and free like he’d never experienced a problem in his life.

Roman was so far out of his league they weren't even playing the same sport- or- whatever the hell that idiom was supposed to mean. Not only that but Roman was already taken, by the stupid emo kid who used to be his best friend, in fact.

Used to be his best friend, that is, until Virgil ditched him the moment he got a chance to be part of the cooler group. The moment he realised that Patton didn't mind his dark makeup and Roman found his dark mysterious aesthetic interesting he’d been gone. He had lost his best friend to the popular kids four years ago, it was only last year when the rumours that Roman and Virgil had started dating began to spread and it made Janus' chest ache with jealousy.

But Janus got on with things despite that. He tried not to glance at Virgil when he passed him in the halls, he tried not to stare at Roman during class and when he sat alone at lunch. He tried to keep himself as mysterious and elusive as he could- he didn't talk to anyone if he could help it and when he had to he spoke in backwards riddles and lies, safe to say no-one wanted to be paired with him for group projects.

And then came one horrible day. It had already been an awful day for him already. His scars were acting up, feeling like they were pulled tight and they itched- they itched so badly despite the lotions and oils he had to put on them every morning. On top of that he'd forgotten both his hat and his glasses when he'd ran out of the house late and he'd been tripped in the corridor twice, it was only his second lesson of the day.

Janus wanted nothing more than to sink through the floor as their teacher went on and on about something or another that he'd catch up on later because he could never focus when he was around other people even when he could actually see what was on the screen. That was until he heard those dreaded words.

"You'll be doing this homework project in pairs!" Their teacher announced and Janus could practically feel the eyes land on him before people glanced away to look at their friends, wondering who would be unlucky enough to end up with him this time.

"Can we choose our own partner?" A girl asked, her voice quiet and tentative as if she didn't want to give the teacher the idea she was hoping the answer would be yes.

The class held their breaths in wait for the answer. The teacher's simple yes or no answer would determine what happened next. If she said yes it would be a chaotic scramble to pair up, a race not to be the last person left without a partner. Because of course the last person to find a partner would end up with Janus.

"No," She said, and now all the class could do was hope, "I’ve bade a list of your partner assignments, please find your name on here and move to sit next to your partner,"

Janus just stayed where he was. He couldn't see the list without his glasses anyway and whoever was his partner would come and sit next to him eventually, probably after asking the teacher if they could switch. Meanwhile Janus looked down at the sheets in front of him, trying to work out though blurry vision and painful scars what the hell they had been learning about.

"Hey," Someone said, sitting down next to him, "You're Janus, right? I'm your partner,"

Janus just hummed, he didn't bother to look up, if he waited long enough maybe his partner would just give up and decide to get on with it by themself.

"Um- I don't think we've ever talked before, but I'm Roman, Prince," He said, Janus' head snapped up and he blinked rapidly, hoping his eyes would actually give him a clearer picture for omce. It really was Roman, honestly fuck him. The universe really seemed to hate him today, "Nice to meet you?"

"Oh won't this be fun," Janus said quietly, he didn't have the energy to muster his usual snippy tone, push him away, his brain said, there's no point in even trying, "Stuck with the class pretty-boy,"

"You will have a month to complete the project," The teacher announced, interrupting whatever taunt or jab Roman probably had prepared for him, a month, seriously? "And I expect you to work with your partner outside of class for this project, I will not be giving you time during classes after today to work on this,"

"Fantastic," Janus said, completely deadpan, he could already hear whispers from other pairs, people pitying Roman for getting stuck with him, but Roman didn't seem to notice in the slightest, he simply placed a notebook on the table and grabbed a pen- a sparkly red glitter gel pen with a plume of tinsel coming from the top- before turning to him again.

"So… any ideas of what we could do?" Roman asked, looking at him with a smile, it was sweet of him to try, Janus thought. He'd give up eventually, just like anyone else.

"I totally know exactly what we're supposed to be doing right now," Janus answered, hand subconsciously going to scratch at the spot by his ear where scar tissue met skin. He grimaced when a nail caught on the rough skin, causing a sharp yanking pain and suddenly he was once again reminded of why he wasn't supposed to scratch the scars. He picked up a pen and began to twirl it instead.

"We're making a project in the format of our choice based around Macbeth," Roman explained with a little bit of a laugh in his voice, Janus sighed, it sounded like a lot of work- and it meant that Janus would actually have to read the Shakespeare play, damn, "So… any ideas of what we could do? It doesn't seem very limited, as long as it's based on the play, so…"

"Nope, no ideas at all," Janus said, flicking his pen effortlessly over his fingers now. He did have an idea or two, but he really didn't feel like sharing, just thinking about Roman made him want to shrivel up and die, let alone being open towards the guy.

"Oh- well that's ok," Roman said with a smile that Janus was certain was forced, even though he couldn’t see, any smile directed at him was usually forced, "Hey- um- here, I'll give you my phone number so we can work out a time to work on this ok?"

"Right," Janus said, taking the paper Roman offered him a moment later. He only fumbled a little bit.

"So I thought it would be fun to do something creative! Like.. we could rewrite the script but modernised! Or- hm- what if we filmed it like a movie?"

"We have a month to do this and you expect us, two highschoolers with zero experience, one of whom can barely move at the best of times, to be able to make a whole movie?" Janus asked, staring at Roman in genuine shock. He shrugged.

"I don't see why not!" He huffed, and, ok, so this guy was delusional, Janus could… probably work with that? "Unless you don't like the idea of course, I believe we could do it,"

"Alright sure, say I was ok with this completely rational idea, where the hell would we film it? On what equipment?" Janus said, glaring at him.

"Well…" Roman said, thinking, "Me and you would obviously act- and don't say you can't act because I've seen you in drama, you do well when you're not paired with someone who's an asshole,"

Janus just stared at him, Roman actually knew he existed? Let alone remember him?

"I could find somewhere for us to film, we just need some kind of castle-ish place… maybe we could use a church? And as for filming… I think my dad might have a tripod? We can just use one of our phones or something…"

"I can't believe I'm actually agreeing to this," Janus sighed, "Can't we just make a stupid PowerPoint slide like normal people,"

"We could," Roman said, before smiling, "But that would be dreadfully boring, wouldn't it?"

Janus just hummed and tried to hide a smile. He looked at his notebook, going to begin writing down plans for their project before realising that oh yeah, his vision was still too blurry to see anything in enough detail to write legibly. He sighed and looked back over at Roman, who was still watching him.

"Is everything alright?" Roman asked, he must've noticed Janus pause.

"I'm fine," Janus said, on instinct at this point, closing his book, "We should plan in your notebook,"

"Oh, ok!" Roman said, shrugging as he turned to a new page in his notebook, flicking the lid off of his gel pen and writing, in big enough letters to make out "Macbeth The Movie" in swirling fancy cursive the middle of the page and underlining it. Underneath he wrote some more things, but Janus couldn't make them out.

"You do realise this play is five acts long, don't you?" Janus asked as Roman scribbled down some more stuff on the next page, before looking up.

"Yeah? So?" Roman asked.

"It has over two hours of runtime," Janus said slowly, hoping to guide Roman into realising what an immense and stupid project this would be.

"And?"

"Hollywood films of the same length can take years to film," Janus reasoned, talking slowly.

"We can do this, Janus!" Roman said firmly, determination in his voice, "No need to be so gloomy! We're not Hollywood, we don't need fancy costumes or scriptwriting or anything! It won't take as long as that!"

"Your endless optimism already astounds me…." Janus muttered, beginning to pack away his things. ���I suppose we can try, at least.��

"Just text me," Roman said with a smile that, for some reason, seemed genuine, "We can meet up later to plan this out properly,"

Janus just nodded as the bell rang before standing up and heading for the door, silently praying that he wouldn't be tripped again, not here, not in front of his stupid stupid crush who for some reason was actually being nice to him

[prince-rowan-of-the-forest]

Siren Boy

Janus foolishly sings along to a siren song and somehow ends up with a siren interested in something other than murdering him.

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| Ao3 |

Warnings: minor injury

Pairings: pre-romantic roceit

Word count: 2177

Notes:

a fic for day 5 of Roceit Week (this should've been posted yesterday but I got distracted reading lol). The prompt was 'duet' and this fic... barely fits into that. LIke, such a loose thread it's barely visible. but still I wrote something. it's not my best work but this fandom needs a more saturated mermaid fic market, so, here you go.

Reblog to let Roman kiss the pretty human.

I hope you enjoy!!

----

Janus sighed, leaning against the railings of the ship he was currently sailing on and looking out across the endless sea towards the horison. 

His job paid well but got incredibly boring incredibly quickly. He wasn’t part of the crew that scurried back and forth across the deck. He wasn’t even really a sailor, despite what he told the people who hired him. 

And despite his affinity for the sea, Janus really had no place on boats amongst sailors, not really. 

He was a child of a siren and a human, born with human legs and thus useless to his aquatic kin, born with scales and fangs and a voice like silk which made his hated by the humans he was stuck with.

But Janus had made do, survived, grown up. He’d worked out how to utilise people’s paranoia and his own talents for money to make a living, worked out how to talk his way onto ships and make a living on the sea, even if part of him wished to be in it, rather than drifting atop it. 

It was mostly pirate crews he was able to get on board with because they were most suspicious of the sea, although they were the most unpleasant to be aboard with too. Pirates - despite being the most likely to hire him - were also the most likely to mistreat him and underpay him. One incredibly nasty captain had even attempted to take his scales whilst he was sleeping. But that was a story for another time.

For now, Janus was actually aboard a royal ship (an amazing opportunity for him, royals payed very well, actually) and his job was to protect the travelling family against the lure of his own kind, the sirens who lurked in the waters and hoped the drag the glittering royals into the sea using song that did not effect Janus. 

Which was why they hired him. Because of his siren heritage, Janus wasn’t effected by siren song, meaning that if he heard it, he could warn the crew and passengers and make sure they stayed below deck until the sirens had given up. He was supposed to protect them. 

Right now it was night. He and the lookouts up in the crows nest were the only ones out on deck and sirens rarely attacked this far out from their cosats anyway. So instead of really paying attention like he should be, Janus was resting his chin on an arm on the banister, looking out to the open sea and occasionally throwing a small jewel (a pile of which he’d stolen from the royal safe, because he would be long gone before they ever found out and he didn’t really care) as far as he could and listening for the satisfying splash sound they made. 

And maybe the reason he was so startled when he heard the first notes of drifting song was because he was not paying attention. That didn’t mean he didn’t snap into action immediately upon feeling the little tug on the edges of his mind - for him it was light enough to brush off easily, not so much for the other humans on board the boat. He whistled twice, sharp and loud, through his fingers to alert the others on the deck to get inside. He couldn’t let the sirens hurt anyone, or the only reputation that allowed him any income at all would be ruined. 

Luckily for him, he’d caught the sound of song early enough for the lookouts to get inside so that Janus could bolt the doors from the outside and return to the railings with a lanturn to look around and see if he could spot the culprits of the song.

He couldn’t see anyone yet, they must still be under the water, but he could hear the notes of the song clear as day and strangely enough he found he actually… recognised the tune? That was a first. 

There was no harm in humming along, right? The song was familiar, a shanty he had heard often enough aboard pirate vessels, he was pretty sure. He hadn’t heard it enough to know the words off of the top of his head, but he knew the melody well enough to join in. 

Only a minute or so later, the song ceased and Janus thought for a second that the siren had given up until he heard a loud splash. He yelped, before narrowing his eyes at the water, he still couldn’t see anyone… 

He leaned further over the railing, lowering the lanturn towards the water below in hopes to get a better view. Seconds later he realised how stupid of a thing to do that was as his hand slipped on the railing, he barely had a second to slam his eyes shut before he began to fall. He cried out, though he already knew it was useless because minutes previously he’d locked everyone else below deck. 

He’d expected to fall, hit the water and either be drowned or ripped apart and eaten by the creatures that were probably swarming down there. He expected to succumb to a fate he had been so sure he was immune to. 

Something grabbed his ankle and Janus cried out as his whole body jerked- momentum from the fall stopping so abruptly it had pain shooting through his ankle to the point where he was slightly worried he was injured worse than a bruise. But his main worry right now was not his potentially sprained ankle, but what the hell had caught him in the first place. 

Janus tried to look back up at the boat from where he was dangling and when he did his eyes were immediately caught by a pair that glittered like rubies in the starlight. They lit up when Janus caught their eye, grinning wide enough to show sharp teeth not unlike Janus’ own. 

“Careful,” They said, smirking, their voice sounding foreign in a way Janus had never heard on his travelled, “You might fall if you lean too far over.”

“A little late for that warning, don’t you think?” Janus said, a little breathlessly, he was starting to get a little light headed from hanging upside down for too long, “Any chance yuo could lift me up?”

They pouted, “Not even a thank you?”

“Thank you,” Janus said, trying to keep his tone as sincere and panic free and the growing nausea, “Very much for catching me, I really appreciate having my life saved, but if I hang here much longer I fear I might pass out.”

“Alright alright,” They said, rolling their eyes before finally hoisting Janus up over the ship railing and letting him sprawl onto his back on the deck and catch his breath, “That was close, lucky I was here, huh?”

Janus huffed, sitting up and turning to the stranger, who was sill lying draped across the boat’s railing, chin now resting on a hand. It was dark, but now that Janus had the ship’s lanterns aiding his eyes (he had unfortunately dropped his in his fall) he could mostly see their whole appearance and… oh god. 

“You’re-” Janus started.

“A siren? Yes, well observed,” They said, still grinning. Their bright red hair was long and streaked with gold, the fins on their ears and arms as well as their dorsal which Janus could see clearly were a translucent pinkish red, dotted with glittering sparks though they drooped in the open air. Their tail was mostly hidden, hanging down the outside of the boat and thus lost from Janus’ eyes to the darkness. 

And a pretty big thing that Janus could definitely see, was how shirtless this guy was. 

Of course he was shirtless, because merfolk didn’t have shirts, but Janus didn’t realise before just now how bad of a position that put him in, because he was far too gay and shaken up to deal with all of this right now.

Why had the siren who’d tried to lure him into the water saved him anyway? Where was the logic in that?

“Like what you see, sweetie?” They said with a smirk, Janus tore his gaze away, looking off in the other direction out of spite.

“Shut up,” Janus said, “What are you doing here, anyway? Shouldn’t you be in the water with the other fish?”

“Ooooh someone’s upset, guess I hit a nerve,” The siren said, wow, really mature, “You’re rude, I literally saved you! Does it matter why I’m here?”

“Surely it was your intention to lure me into the water?” Janus said, still looking away, “Why would you save me?”

The siren was silent for a moment just long enough for Janus to give in and look back, only to find them watching him with an odd expression. 

“Because you sang back to me- it was fun to sing with you rather than alone…” they said eventually, “No-one’s ever done that before, I was curious.”

“Right,” Janus said, turning his attention to his ankle - just for something to do other than look at the (very pretty, don’t think about that) siren. He pulled off his shoe and sock and sucked in a sharp breath at the pain the action caused. His ankle was indeed swollen and bruised, sprained at least. There was a crash next to him and the siren let out a loud ‘oof’, Janus turned to find that they had fallen from the railing onto the deck next to him, whether intentionally or not, Janus didn’t really care.

“Apologies,” They said, “That was incredibly inelegant of me.”

Janus huffed and went back to inspecting his injured ankle. Maybe it wasn’t wise to ignore the siren, who could certainly be quite deadly to him if they wanted to be.

He was aware than in his peripheral that they were slowly shifting closer to him, but they also seemed to think they were being sneaky, so Janus pretended not to notice for now.

That was until they reached over and brushed their clawed fingers over his injured ankle - although lightly - earning them a sharp elbow to the shoulder and a loud hiss as Janus backed away. Part of his mind told him that such a reaction was horribly animalistic, but he knew that was the people who found him and raised him talking and he tried really hard not to care right now as the siren seemed to wilt a little bit.

“I didnt mean to hurt you,” They said softly, sitting back to leave a fair amount of space between them both, “I could heal you- but- um- you probably wouldn’t want me to, so, it’s fine.”

“Why on earth would I not want to be healed?” Janus said, glaring, though mostly he just felt confused. He might not trust the siren, but he knew they had a whole range of useful abilities when they weren’t trying to kill you, so why…

“Because I would have to kiss you,” Roman said, “And your reaction to that touch a second ago made me think you might be against that-”

“Kiss me?” Janus yelped, the siren made a hand gesture as if to say ‘I told you so’, “I don’t even know your name!”

“My name is Roman - why exactly is that a prerequisite for me healing you?”

“Okay, Roman,” Janus said, coming to the realisation that they probably didn’t know what a kiss insinuated in human culture, he took a deep breath and attempted to explain as shortly as he could, though his face was pretty red by the end of it anyway.

“Romantic interest?” Roman said, tilting their head a little, “Like- mates?”

“Um, yes, well-” Janus answered, frowning, he was glad he knew enough about sirens for this, otherwise it would make conversations like this so much more difficult, “The first time you kiss someone probably happens before that, to, uh, express attraction for someone? But it’s quite intimate and I have hesitations.”

Roman hummed, tail swishing a little where it was now draped across the deck of the boat. Janus was frankly astonished by how big the fin was, enough that Janus could probably lay across the entire fin with spare roon. He’d always assumed they were smaller. 

“But if it’s just to heal what I hurt,” Roman said slowly, “Then surely it would be ok?”

Janus considered for a moment, wondered why the idea of kissing Roman didn’t seem even remotely as horrible an idea as it should have. In fact, a large part of him really wanted to say yes. 

“And besides, you are very attractive, I wouldn’t mind kissing you the other way too.” Roman said nonchalantly, looking away. Janus tried to get his suddenly flaming blush under control whilst Roman wasn’t looking. 

“Just healing,” Janus said eventually, “We can uh- circle back to the other way later.”

“...Fine, just healing,” Roman hugged, reaching out a hand with a smirk on their face, “For now,”

Janus hesitated, before pulling in a deep breath of cold night air and taking Roman’s hand. 

----

Tags: @full-of-roman-angst-trash @reptilianrapscallion420 @your-local-random-dino @cutebisexualmess (if anyone wants to be added let me know!)

@roceit2023

[naminethewriter]

Roceit Week 2023 Masterpost

Masterpost of my entries for the Roceit Week 2023 by @roceit2023

Series here on Ao3

The Leaves Falling Outside (04/06/23) Ao3 | Tumblr Romantic Roceit / rated G / 721 words Roman and Janus are growing old together. Sometimes Janus just forgets how time flies, like leaves on the wind.

It's a Twisted Reference (04/08/23) Ao3 | Tumblr Roceit / rated G / 701 words Janus is late for his teatime with the prince. Roman makes his displeasure known.

I Still Recognize You (04/09/23) Ao3 | Tumblr Romantic Roceit / rated G / 738 words Roman is waiting for his partner at a Masquerade Ball. Then he spots the most gorgeous person he's ever seen.

I Get to Whine, I'm in Pain! (04/10/23) Ao3 | Tumblr Romantic Roceit / rated G / 250 words Roman is sick of soup. Too bad that's all he can eat for now.

Our High School Musical Moment (04/10/23) Ao3 | Tumblr Pre-Romantic Roceit / rated G / 1,213 words Roman auditions for a gay production of High School musical and is immediately smitten by his duet partner.

A War Patton Would Approve Of (04/11/23) Ao3 | Tumblr Romantic Roceit / rated G / 338 words Roman and Janus have a compliment war.

Cursed Woods (04/12/23) Ao3 | Tumblr Romantic Roceit / rated T / 1,228 words Roman is almost home! If only he could convince Janus to go with him.

[siren1song]

So!! I know I promised Roceit hurt/comfort when the video first came out but a few things came up and I haven't been able to.

But!!! Crowgan (@just-a-little-bit-gay-oops) made a very good point about Roman not meaning his harsh words and reminded me I was gonna write this.

A note that I'm on mobile and right now I'm tired so I don't really feel like including the taglist or all of my formatting. Also, I don't know if this is entirely accurate to the point Crowgan made bc I have ADHD and I can't focus on things with lots of a text sometime sksbdjd.

How We Fall Apart

Roman was so confused and upset and angry and any other adjective that could excuse why he acted the way he did.

They all could excuse it, but he didn't. He didn't want to have excuses, he wanted.

Roman wanted to apologize. Specifically to De-

To Janus.

But he was a coward. He was coward and all he was doing was hiding in his-

It wasn't even in his room he was hiding in. It was just an old dusty room that had Magnus faded out on the door.

That certainly couldn't be foreshadowing.

Either way, he was hiding in someone else's room and he was a coward and he didn't want to face Janus or Patton or Thomas.

Did he even want to be himself anymore?

"You know, I think it's incredibly ironic that you came here when you're feeling the way you do."

Roman jumped, head shooting up from where it had been buried between his knees to see Janus standing in the doorway, pulling his glove off and wiping a finger along the wall.

"Disgusting, I can't believe I let this room get so out of order," he muttered.

Roman decided to ignore that, because what was Janus doing here?

Janus looked towards him, and though Roman hadn't said anything, he felt like the side knew exactly what was going through his mind.

"I'm sorry."

Or not?

"For what?" Roman asked, wincing a little at the way his voice croaked, obviously hoarse from the crying he was desperately trying not to do.

Janus frowned, pulling his other glove off and tucking them both into his pocket as he approached Roman, picking his way through the mess on the floor.

Whoever Magnus was, he didn't really know how to keep his room clean.

"For saying what I did, though I'm sure you can understand I was… a little hurt by your reaction to my name."

Roman flinched this time, looking back down at his knees, eyes trailing the grayish tint of dust having gathered on the cuffs of his pants.

"...I want to say I didn't mean that. Reacting that way wasn't. It was a shitty thing to do," he said softly, reaching to start rubbing his thumb against the dirty fabric, pulling it back to see his thumb greyed with dust.

Janus was quiet, and then he was lowering himself to the floor.

"You want to say it, so why don't you?"

Roman buried his fingers in the carpet, staring blankly when he lifted his hand and it was covered in dust and grime.

"Oh, gross, why did you do that?" Janus said, wrinkling his nose and prompting a weak chuckle from Roman as he shrugged.

"I'm not as pristine as I thought, I suppose. Why say I'm sorry, that I didn't mean it, when I'm not even sure if I did?"

Janus hummed, but Roman continued before he could start again.

"And I don't think I did. But I also wanted to go to the callback and I was told that was wrong. And then my own decision was wrong even though I just wanted to help Thomas be the best he could be! So what do I know about how I feel and what's right or wrong?" 

Before Roman could continue on his self hating tangent, Janus put his hand over his mouth.

Janus put his own hand over Roman's mouth.

He must have seen Roman's confusion, because he gave him a shaky sort of smile that made him realize there were tears in both of their eyes.

"I'm not going to force you to believe in confidence you don't have right now, Roman. But if you say you didn't mean to make fun of my name when you were hurt and lashing out, I'm going to trust that."

Roman nodded, and Janus pulled his hand away.

Wiping his tears from his face, Roman hiccupped a sigh, then winced when he realize he'd just smeared the dusty grime from the carpet all over his cheek.

"I need a shower," he mumbled, and Janus nodded his agreement.

"Oh definitely, and I need to go process the fact that you guys… know my name now."

Roman huffed a laugh.

"Oh, I'm sure it'll be weird to adjust to," he said softly.

Everything would be weird to adjust to. But maybe Roman would still have someone on his side to help him figure things out.

[chemically-imbalanced-emo]

Last To Know

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences (For language & like 2 sex jokes)

Archive Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Relationships: Platonic Anxceit, Romantic Roceit (Pining, Pre-Relationship)

Word Count: 2326

Also Available On AO3 !!!

"You're early."

"Yeah well, Logan got most of the planning done yesterday so it didn't take too long." Virgil walked into Janus' room, purple blanket bundled in his arms, promptly dropping himself down onto the bed. "You're picking the show tonight, right?"

"If you'd like. I trust you know it's just going to be the same as every other time I pick, though." Janus smiled slightly, locking the door and walking over to the shelf of DVDs next to the dresser.

"I'd expect nothing less, Fangs." He replied sarcastically.

A minute passed in comfortable silence, filled with nothing but quiet breathing and the shuffling of the casings on the DVDs as Janus looked through them. Virgil's gaze traveled over to the closet, more specifically the mural painted on the doors. The delicate figures of Eurydice and Orpheus stood out from the dark wood. Virgil had painted that months prior, a request from Janus that the side was oddly anxious to ask for. He was proud of that piece in particular; He was never good at painting people-

His daydreaming was cut short by an annoyed hiss coming from the other, who was now crouched down on the floor, shoving the DVD cases around. Laughing quietly, Virgil called out from the bed.

"It's next to the record player. You left it out last time we watched it, remember?"

Another second passed before Janus answered under his breath, "Thank you."

"Damn, no insult at the door and a thank you? You're feeling generous today, Jan."

He didn't get an answer that time, only another hiss followed by the sound of the DVD player closing. Rolling his eyes, he sat up and moved over, making room on the bed for Janus to sit next to him.

This was weirdly one of Virgil's favourite times. As much as he loved the needlessly messy mornings spent baking with Patton, the energetic sessions spent ranting with Logan, and even Roman's attempts at bonding through storytelling. Of course, that last one a bit less so. Really, who told Roman an actual dragon was a good idea?

Well anyways, none of those even held a candle to the nights spent back in Janus' room. As much as Virgil would deny it, he did really miss the snake. Missed his stupid sarcasm and the conversations had mostly through intelligible hand gestures and weird, animal-like hissing, and Remus randomly dropping in. (Sometimes literally, the ceiling would never truly recover.)

It was hard to realise sometimes that it was actually happening. That his leaving the dark side didn't make him permanently lose his best friend, as he'd feared. That he could still have these quiet evenings filled with small, meaningless conversations and the Friends intro that Janus would always refuse to skip.

A wave of anxiety snapped him out of his own thoughts, and Virgil looked over at Janus, concerned. He had felt some anxiety in the room but this was much more than the normal amount. This room was Janus' safe space, the fear level was always relatively low.

"You okay? You're kinda shaking."

"I'm fine," Janus answered shortly. "Just a bit cold in here."

It wasn't of course. Despite how natural the lie sounded, it was easy to tell that even his cold-bloodedness was not what was causing his anxiety. Virgil's eyes flickered down to his friend's hands.

"You're wearing your gloves. What's wrong?"

"Why would something be wrong?" He hissed, rolling his eyes. "Is it so wrong for me to leave them on?"

"Of course not, you just never do. You always keep them off in here." Virgil waited, and continued when he didn't get a response. "I can feel your panic from here, Janus. Talk to me."

"That's awfully annoying, you know," Janus snapped. "My emotions are private, you can't just walk in with your little 'fear detector' and demand some sort of explanation. I don't owe you anything."

Raising his eyebrows, Virgil sat up more, turning to properly face the other. He was breathing heavily, as if already self-regulating his breaths. His hands were still shaking, fists clenched, making the fabric of his gloves stretch around his knuckles. And while his snake eye was perfectly normal, his human one was wide, determinedly staring straight at the TV, the ceiling, anything but back at Virgil.

"I know you don't owe me anything, Dee. But I want to help you, and I can't do that if you won't tell me what's scaring you."

"Well it's a good thing I totally asked you to help, isn't it? Honestly, it's like you're not even listen-" Janus cut himself off when Virgil grabbed his hands suddenly. "What do you think you're doing, Anxiety?"

Virgil smirked, clearly amused at Janus' attempt to insult him, and let go of his hands.

"Jeez, you really haven't gotten any less dramatic have you?" He laughed lightly. "Listen, I know my 'fear detector' pisses you off, but you have to admit it's not exactly fun when I literally have to tell you the truth about everything."

Janus opened his mouth to object, closing it again when he realised he'd once again lost this argument. Virgil grinned.

"So I'm gonna ask again, do you wanna talk about whatever's bothering you? Because it must be pretty bad if you don't even feel safe enough to take your gloves off."

This time, Janus hesitated, looking back at the TV before answering, his voice much softer than before.

"Not right now. I do want to tell you, but can it wait a bit? I'm still somewhat thinking it through myself."

"Yeah Scales, of course." Virgil agreed quickly, pausing before looking down at his own hands. "I didn't upset you too much, did I? I know I overthink a lot but I really didn't mean to come off as pushy. I wanna help, but you don’t have to tell me anything you don't want to, and I don't want to make you feel like I'll be mad if you don't want to share something personal."

When he didn't receive an immediate answer, he looked up at Janus, hands starting to nervously tap on his legs. Janus was staring back, eyes wide with disbelief and confusion, before smiling softly. It was a smile Virgil had been so used to in childhood, and even though he was able to see it more now, it still filled him with a sort of bittersweet nostalgia.

"Goodness, we really are awful at this friendship thing aren’t we?" Janus sighed, before looking down at his gloves. After a moment of hesitation, he carefully pulled them off, placing them down gently on the bedside table. Looking back over, he took Virgil's hands in his own.

"I promise I'm not angry with you, Spider. If I was, you and I both know you wouldn't still be in my room."

"I just thought-"

"You think a lot of things. And most of them only exist to satisfy your own self-depreciation." He smirked at Virgil rolling his eyes in response. "A deal, then. If at any point I call out a lie, if you truly do not want me to know, simply snap…" He snapped his fingers. "And I will let it go. No strings attached. If you don't, I'll know you're okay with me pushing, despite your stubbornness to tell me. However, I expect you to do the same with your power. Sound fair enough?"

Virgil was openly smiling now, barely holding back a laugh. "Yeah. Yeah, that's fine…" He chuckled. "God this is so cringy."

Janus' soft smile immediately dropped, leaving his usual annoyed expression.

"Tell me, do you have to ruin every heartfelt moment with jokes?"

"It's part of the brand. Sorry, Fangs."

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

They went back to watching after that, the silence more comfortable than tense now that the problem was… well, not quite fixed, but settled, at least for the moment.

Virgil subconsciously watched the minutes pass on the clock, thoughts still stuck on the (albeit now softer) pulses of wavering nervousness coming from his friend. Whatever was bothering Janus had clearly only started recently, or Virgil certainly would've realised last time he'd been here.

Maybe Patton had insulted Janus again, and he was just upset or insecure. That had happened before, it wouldn't be too unbelievable.

Or maybe something was wrong with Remus, at least more than usual. But he'd been acting normal lately. At least, for him.

Or maybe…

Virgil's eyes snapped up as a hand grabbed one of his own, squeezing it once. He looked over at Janus, who was looking determinedly at the T.V. Smiling, he squeezed back.

After a moment he looked away from their joined hands, startling slightly when he saw Janus staring at him.

"Dee? You uh... You okay?"

"I was out in the Imagination yesterday…" Janus said quietly.

"Are you hurt?"

"No! No, I wasn't…" He sighed. "I was in Roman's half. Nothing in there would hurt a fly."

"Oh, yeah Ro isn't really the type to-" Virgil cut himself off, taking note of Janus' rigid form. "Wait, why were you in there?"

"No particular reason."

"Calling bullshit on that-"

"Anyway!" Virgil smirked as Janus rolled his eyes. "My reason for being there doesn't matter. What I wanted to say was that I ran into Roman while I was there."

Both of Janus' hands were back in his lap now, the right one scratching at the scales on his left.

Virgil tilted his head, confused. At first, he'd assumed Roman was injured, and Janus was just worried about how to break the news to everyone. But that thought was quickly diminished when he noticed the anxiety pulsing off his friend.

Or, more accurately, the lack of anxiety.

Janus' body language was textbook nervousness, identical to how he'd been acting before. Yet Virgil couldn't sense anything. No panic, no fear, nothing.

"Did... Something happen?" He asked slowly.

The other didn't answer verbally, just nodding his head slightly. He was silent for another moment before taking a breath and shaking his head.

"I... I was out by the castle. The one with the gold fountain and the rose garden."

Virgil nodded, motioning for him to continue.

"I was upset. You know how I feel about people seeing me cry. I just wanted to be alone. Roman wasn't supposed to be there. I had thought he was busy with Logan."

Mentally noting to ask why the other was upset, Virgil frowned. "He wasn't mad at you, was he? I mean you know he said you could go in whenever after the-"

"He wasn't," Janus stressed. "He wasn't angry at all. He just... Sat there. He just sat next to me and held my hand. He didn't even ask why I was in his garden."

"I don't get it, Jay. Did you want him to yell at you or something? If it was him touching you I'm sure he'd apologise if you told him you didn't want him to without asking-"

Virgil was cut off by a hand (his own, he noticed) covering his mouth. It fell almost immediately, And Janus muttered an apology.

"He's perfect, Virgil. That insufferable prince makes me feel safe and protected and I hate it. I..."

He gestured his hands wildly in front of him before dropping them and finally looking Virgil in the eye.

"I think I like him, Annie." He breathed.

"Wait what?"

But it seemed Janus was done talking now, just staring down at his own hands.

"Janus I don't..." He paused, considering his words carefully. "I don't know how to tell you this, but the only person who doesn't know you like Roman is you."

…

"What?"

Okay, bad response, maybe he fucked this up. Possibly. Maybe.

"Well maybe not everyone! Maybe just like a few people. I mean Logan is like totally clueless in that aspect, right? I'm pretty sure Remus propositioned him yesterday and he asked when Remus got into business. So there's like no way he knows! It's really not-" He was cut off by his own hand again, and this time he was grateful. (Really, how long was he planning on talking?)

"Are you telling me…" Janus started slowly, raising his eyes to meet Virgil's. "That Roman has been aware of this. This entire time?"

Wincing slightly, Virgil nodded slightly, leaning back to avoid the inevitable yelling that was about to start.

…

Any second now…

Or… not?

"That absolute menace." Janus hissed, throwing his hands down, letting the other talk again in the process.

"Dee come on it's not that bad-"

"No. He does not get to just get away with that. I'll show that prissy little…"

Before Virgil was able to say anything, Janus was gone, slamming the door behind him. Fully collapsing back on the bed, Virgil sighed. This was going to be... Interesting.

"Finally! God, even I was getting tired of that shit."

Virgil definitely did not scream, or jump up, fully standing on the bed, thank you very much. Nor did his breath hitch as he watched a dark shadow leech out from under the bed, almost building onto itself until Remus was standing in front of him, a smirk on his face.

"Hey Emo~"

"Remus! What the fuck, man?"

"Oh blah blah blah, complain later. You just brought the end of six months of the most painful pining I have ever had to watch. I could kiss you!"

"Please don't." Virgil laughed, still slightly out of breath, lowering himself down to sit next to the duke.

"Yeah, fair enough," Remus snorted. "Anyways, $10 says Double Dee kicks my brother's ass?" He held a hand out towards Virgil, who looked at him shocked.

"You- We are not betting on-" He scoffed, pausing when Remus simply raised an eyebrow, keeping his hand where it was.

After a moment, Virgil gave in, shaking the other's hand reluctantly.

"$20 says Ro kisses him before he even gets the chance."

"Oh, you are so on!"

[i-am-bitterly-jittery]

Moxiety Week Masterlist 🩵💜

Day 1: Cuddles/Stuffed Animals Oneshot | Word Count: 380 | Pre-AA | Platonic

Day 2: Birthday/Surprise Oneshot | Word Count: 825 | Human AU | Romantic | & implied/background Logince, Dukeceit

Day 3: Roleswap/AU | Part 2 Multi-part | Incomplete | Light Side!Virgil Dark Side!Patton AU | Platonic/Pre-Relationship

Day 4: Movie Night Oneshot | Word Count: 651 | Canonverse | Romantic

Day 5: Falling Asleep Oneshot | Word Count: 396 | Canonverse | Romantic

Day 6: Learning to Dance Oneshot | Word Count: 1289 | Royalty AU | Romantic | & background Roceit

Day 7: Gift Exchange Oneshot | Word Count: 2009 | High School AU | Romantic | & Loceit

[a-small-batch-of-dragons]

Built on a Lie

Prompt: I like the possible idea of Janus being a absolutely crushed to find Roman bleeding out due to a bruised ego in his room after pof was uploaded. After all most Sander Sides Fans hated Roman after he mocked Janus's Name.

Thanks for the prompt, babe! I hope it’s what you wanted!

Read on Ao3

Pairings: arguably roceit i guess??? it’s just focused on them, can be platonic or romantic if you want. same with LAMP, DLAMP, DLAMPR

Warnings: sympathitic janus even if it might not seem like it, sympathetic feral protective remus, roman is a hurt boi

Word Count: 5010

The wedding is tough.

After the wedding is an ordeal.

After after the wedding…hurts.

The Mindscape is all but deserted. No one wants to come out to the common areas for risk of running into someone who they had…disagreements with or getting swept up in a painfully awkward conversation. Patton lingers in the kitchen, Virgil almost never opens his door, Logan works, and Remus, well…Remus is the only one still behaving as normal.

Janus is grateful for his consistency.

In all honesty, and oh, the irony, he doesn’t enjoy this. He doesn’t enjoy the others walking on eggshells constantly, nor does he thrill at how they seem to jump at everyone, not just him. His point was made. That is his job.

But he’s not so sure he fully anticipated the cost.

At the very least, Logan seems to get over their troubles first. He approaches Janus a few days after the wedding and offers one of his philosophy books. Janus accepts it gratefully and by the time he’s finished it, Logan starts talking again. It’s not the greatest thing for the Mindscape that Logan is willing to talk to the others again.

Patton comes around next, simply because he’s the kindest. Janus pities him a little for it. But sure enough, the common areas start to ring again, drawing Remus out from the depths to cause his chaos.

Virgil appears next, summoned by the repeated calling of Remus’s antics and Janus’s exasperation. And sometimes, well, sometimes it seems like they’re back in their hallway, with Patton and Logan looking on with the air of some bemused anthropologists.

All the Sides reemerge and start trying to figure out what’s going on except for Roman.

Roman is nowhere to be found.

“He…he just needs some more time, I’m sure.”

“Roman is prone to fits of dramatics. It is unsurprising that he chooses to have a repeat performance.”

“Princey’s a bit of an asshole, it’s gonna take him a while to own up to what he did.”

“Catch!”

Janus grunts and staggers under Remus’s weight, eventually getting them both with their feet back under them on the floor. He adjusts his hat and looks disapprovingly at the amount of slime Remus has managed to get all over himself.

“What were you even doing?”

“Exploring the precise relationship of viscera to ventricles inside the heart of a blue whale!” Remus shakes his sleeve. “They lied about how bit the veins and arteries are.”

“How did you—nevermind,” Janus sighs, “I don’t want to know. Now, will you answer my question or not?”

Remus shrugs. “Dunno. Not paying attention.”

“…Roman’s not or you’re not?”

“I’m not!” He flicks some slime at Janus’s hat. “But you should be!”

“Yes, well, when slime starts to emerge from every corner again, I’ll chase you down.”

“Ooh, promises, promises.”

Janus doesn’t hurl some of the slime at Remus as he sinks out.

Roman still hasn’t appeared and the others are starting to notice. Thomas isn’t exactly in a position to do a whole lot of things, but at the very least he’s not doing what he perhaps should have been capable of. Logan notices and at first, chalks it up to the fact that they are in a pandemic; lapses in peak physical and mental performance are not unexpected, but it quickly becomes clear that it’s a little more than that.

The Mindscape grows dimmer, more sluggish. Thomas doesn’t seem to want to do much of anything, let alone work.

“I don’t understand,” Patton mumbles one afternoon when they meet—sans Roman—to try and figure out what’s going on, “I know I’m having a few—um, it’s not Thomas’s feelings that are causing us problems.”

Janus doesn’t make a note of how Virgil quickly presses his arm against Patton’s shoulder.

“There are certain things that are to be expected under times of great stress,” Logan muses, “and certainly any pre-existing problems will be exacerbated, but…this was not anticipated.”

Remus cranks the chainsaw and sets about carving up a new slice of…whatever he’s working on. “We’re in a pandemic, Spectacles!”

“I am wildly aware.”

Virgil stares at the chainsaw—which is fair—then up to Remus. “You ever been in a pandemic before, Remus?”

“Nope!”

Virgil rolls his eyes. “Okay, so that makes sense. But L’s right, this feels…weird. Like we’re missing something pretty big.”

In unison, they all look towards Roman’s seat.

The room falls as quiet as it can with Remus’s chainsaw still in the background.

The big, red, overstuffed armchair looks…different, without Roman lounging in it. The blinds aren’t drawn but it looks like the coloring has faded significantly, as though it’s been out in the sun for far too long. The seams look as though they’re struggling and there’s a dark imprint on one of the arms.

It’s not a shock to Janus to discover he’s never really looked at the chair before.

“Has anyone heard from Roman,” Logan asks quietly, “since the wedding?”

Virgil shakes his head, glancing around. Patton looks down at his chest.

“You think this is Roman.” It’s not a question.

“HIs tantrums do not normally last for this long,” Logan continues, adjusting his tie, “and whilst I admit that perhaps our circumstances have contributed more than I anticipated, I do not believe that is how Roman feels.”

“Princey has been away for a really long time.”

“Thomas is starting to get hurt by it,” Patton mumbles, laying a hand on his chest, “I can—I’m starting to feel it a little.”

“So we need to get Princey’s head out of his ass again.”

Logan sighs. “Most likely.”

“I didn’t want to rush it,” Patton says, glancing at Janus, “but you guys are right. I think he’s being selfish now.”

At the word ‘selfish,’ Remus freezes.

The chainsaw splutters and dies to the floor with a heavy clunk.

“Remus,” Patton scolds, “be careful with the…”

He trails off when he notices what the rest of them have.

Remus is standing completely still—an impossibility for Remus—his head tilted back, eyes fixed on a point in the ceiling. His nose quivers, almost like a bloodhound.

His nose twitches.

His lip curls up into a snarl.

His morning star appears in his hand with a growl as he tears off toward the stairs.

“Remus? Remus!”

“Wait!”

“What the fuck is going on?”

“Remus!”

Janus closes his eyes, reaching out to see if he can tell where Remus is going. His eyes shoot open.

“Roman’s room. Now.”

Virgil grabs Logan and Patton and sinks out.

Janus tries to appear in Roman’s room only to hit something burning cold. He hisses and flinches away from it, only to realize that he hasn’t materialized properly and is stuck. The burning cold reaches further, further, into his scales, digging under them, until Janus yanks himself away and appears, panting, in the hallway outside Roman’s door.

Virgil appears too, still holding the others. “What the fuck was that?”

“Did he block us out?”

“None of us have the ability to do that, other than Thomas.”

“Did he get Thomas to block us out?”

“I don’t know!”

A loud crash jerks their attention to Remus. He raises his morning star again and drives the spikes deep into the bright red of Roman’s door.

…that isn’t nearly as bright as it should be.

Remus snarls again and wails against the door. The wood starts to creak and buckle under the onslaught. He hefts the weapon again and shatters the door with a thunderous crack.

The morning star is hastily flung aside as Remus claws at the splintered wood, yanking it away from the hole he’s made.

The door groans and yields.

Remus rushes through, Virgil on his heels. Patton and Logan attempt to follow only to run smack into both of them.

“Why’d you stop, kiddos, we can’t—“

“Let us through, why did you—“

When those two fight their way through and into silence, Janus sighs and gingerly steps through, nudging Logan and Virgil aside to look at what’s got them so shocked. Roman in the middle of a sobbing mess of tissues, probably, or an empty room signifying he’s gone off on some quest in the Imagination, or even a pouting Roman glaring at them for ruining his door.

He gets around Virgil’s shoulder and his blood runs cold. Burning cold.

If they weren’t in Roman’s room, he’s not sure he’d be able to recognize this as Roman.

His pristine white costume is stained an ugly brown. The gold trimmings fall limply off, hating on by barely a thread. His hair sticks to the floor in horrid, matted clumps. His hands are speckled and stained with more blood, some congealed and crusted from the puddle on the floor. His legs bend at awkward and uncomfortable angles. One of his arms is stretched away from, reaching for something.

Or anything.

They dare not move. They dare hardly breathe.

Remus takes a step forward. Then another. Then another. He circles the body on the floor, not caring about stepping in the blood, crouching down on the far side. His face is drawn, paler than Janus has ever seen it go, he looks sick.

If…if Remus looks this bad—

Remus looks up at the others. His face darkens.

“Explain,” he whispers, his voice low and soft and dangerous, “now.”

No one can find words to even try.

When no one says anything, Remus crouches down and, with a tenderness that shocks Janus, lays his hand on Roman’s side.

“Roman,” he whispers, almost inaudibly, “Roman, can you hear me?”

“...Re?”

“Yeah, Ro-Bro, it’s—it’s me.”

“Wha’re you…here?”

“I wasn’t paying attention,” Remus growls, looking up at them again, “maybe no one was.”

“’S fine.”

“Roman, it is about the furthest from fine that it could be.”

“…’ve had worse.”

“…okay I was wrong. That is the furthest from fine it could be.”

Judging by the way Roman’s body slumps, his eyes must fall closed again. “You c’n go. D’n’t have to stay.”

“Not on your life.”

“’S fine, Re,” Roman slurs, “the others will…wonder where you are.”

Remus stiffens. His hand tenses on Roman’s side.

“No,” he says softly, “they won’t.”

Roman twitches, his head rolling up. “‘M sorry, Re.”

“What the absolute fuck are you apologizing to me for?”

“Thought they’d…care.” Roman’s head waivers and drop back down. “‘Bout you.”

Patton can’t stifle his whimper.

Roman twitches again. “Wha…”

“They’re not gonna wonder where I am,” Remus growls, “because they’re here.”

Roman’s going to panic. He’s going to freak out and they’ll have to reassure him. Or Roman’s going to be angry and they’ll have to stop him from hurting himself. Or he won’t believe Remus and that…that might be the worst.

…Janus should really stop thinking that.

“Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why’re they here, Re,” Roman mumbles, his body sagging to the floor again, “‘m I late for s’mething?”

Remus snarls and Roman flinches.

“Don’ be mad, Re, please, ‘m sorry—“

“I’m not mad at you, Roman.”

“But you’re mad.”

“No.” Remus stares at them, his voice still even and soft. “I’m enraged.”

Before they can say anything, Roman hisses and jerks. Remus’s hands instantly flit to Roman, searching for whatever’s hurt him.

“What’s happening, Ro,” he growls, “whose ass do I need to kick?”

“You can’t,” Roman wheezes, “can’ stop it.”

“The hell I can.”

“No, you—you actually can’t,” Roman says, reaching for Remus’s hand, “help—help me sit up?”

“Ro, you’re—I don’t know if that’s a good idea.”

“’S fine.”

“I don’t think it is!”

“Please?”

Remus sighs, gingerly wrapping his arms around Roman’s bruised and bloody body. “Come on then.”

Roman’s costume clings to the floor and his back as they sit up, the stain darkening and drying on the belly of his tunic. His head lolls against Remus’s chest, breathing heavily for a moment before he finally looks up.

Oh, his face…

It’s an absolute mess. Blood and salt and other things Janus couldn’t hope to figure out cling to every scrap of skin they can as he squints at them.

“You broke my door.”

“You were in trouble,” Remus replies easily, hoisting Roman to sit properly.

Roman sighs, his breath rattling. “Did I miss a meeting?”

“We…” Logan swallows. “We just came from one.”

“Oh.” Roman closes his eyes. “I’ll…gimme a minute, I’ll—“

“You’re not going anywhere.”

“I gotta do the meeting, Re.”

“The hell you do.”

“You—you don’t have to worry about the meeting, Roman,” Logan says firmly, taking a step closer, “we—what happened to you?”

“What d’you mean?”

“What does he mean?” Virgil explodes. “Roman, what the fuck is wrong with you?”

Roman hisses again. “Don’ have to shout, Virgil.”

“Of fucking course I have to shout! Look at you!”

“I believe that might be more of a reason not to shout,” Logan says quietly. Virgil huffs, balling his hands up into fists.

“What the fuck happened, Roman,” Virgil repeats, “and don’t pretend like you don’t know what we’re talking about.”

Roman sighs again, something whistling, what happened to him?—and sits up away from Remus. “I can’ shout, come closer.”

Logan and Virgil immediately walk forward, crouching down a respectful distance away. Patton takes a moment longer, creeping forward and reaching out a trembling hand toward Roman.

“K-kiddo,” he mumbles, “I’m so—so sorry, I didn’t know—“

“’S okay,” Roman slurs, leaning back against Remus, “’s okay, Pat.”

“Patton?” Logan turns. “What do you know?”

“Yeah, Patton,” Remus growls, “why don’t you tell us.”

Patton shrinks back. “I—I—“

“Shh,” Roman mumbles, clumsily patting Remus’s hand, “don’ do that, ’s okay.”

“No, Roman, it’s not.”

“...kiddo?”

Roman nods.

Patton takes a deep breath. “You guys know that—how Roman gets hurt sometimes when Thomas does something that, uh, doesn’t turn out great?”

“We all get hurt, Pat,” Virgil says, “that doesn’t explain this.”

As if on cue, Roman hisses again.

“No, no, Virgil,” Patton mumbles, “it’s—Roman’s the only one who gets physically hurt when this stuff happens.”

Logan’s eyes widen as he looks at Roman’s injuries. “Of course…”

Despite everything, Roman smiles tiredly up at him. “Figure it out?”

“You’re the Ego,” Logan mumbles, “and thus it follows that you would get…bruised.”

“Wait, that’s a literal thing?”

“Apparently so.”

“Jeez, Princey,” Virgil mumbles, “you coulda told me.”

“You were busy, didn’t wanna give you anything else to worry ‘bout.”

“That’s not—Roman—“

“But Thomas has been inside,” Logan interjects quickly, “alone, he hasn’t—we haven’t done anything since the pandemic began.”

“It’s a pandemic, Lo,” Roman says, “no one’s doing much of anything…besides staying inside, reading things, watching things…”

“So how is this happening to you, Roman,” Patton says, wringing his hands, “what—what’s doing this to Thomas?”

“Fuck,” Virgil says, burying his hands in his hair, “Princey has this been happening to you since the wedding?”

“Mm,” Roman hums, leaning heavily against Remus.

“People are watching the video,” Logan whispers, “and they’re—well, they’re talking about it.”

“Are they—are they still saying Thomas should’ve…” Paton gulps. “Done something different?”

Logan shakes his head. “I’m sure they are but Thomas…Thomas hasn’t been looking at the comments from the video, not really. Virgil and I have specifically told him not to.”

“So then why is Thomas still being hurt by it? Why are people still attacking Thomas?”

“Not—“ their heads all jerk around to look at Roman— “not Thomas.”

He waves a hand at himself.

“Wouldn’t be like this if it were them attacking Thomas.”

“Then what—“

“They’re attacking you?” Virgil’s eyes go wide as they scan over Roman’s injuries. “Directly?”

“Mm.”

“Oh, kiddo—“

“Princey, what the hell—“

“Why didn’t you tell us? We could’ve��“

“What for?”

In response, Roman’s eyes raise slowly, and look at Janus.

Everyone else follows, looking back toward the door, realizing that Janus hadn’t moved closer with the rest of them.

Roman’s gaze isn’t cold, but it makes him feel cold.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh, no.

“My name,” Janus breathes, “it’s…they’re mad at you because of me.”

“Told you,” Roman slurs as his eyes close again, “gotta come closer. Can’ shout like this.”

Janus swallows heavily, his throat dry, clutching his cloak tightly around him as he edges closer. Roman mumbles to himself until Janus is close enough to hear him.

“There we go…” He cracks a bloodied eye open. “You’re right. They’re angry at me. Rightfully so, but…yeah.”

“Because you made fun of my name?”

They all rush forward as Roman keens, his hand flying to his gut and hissing.

“Fuck, Princey, is it—is it still happening?”

“Mhm.”

“How do we—how do we stop it?”

“Can’t,” Roman mumbles, “wasn’t lying. Nothing you can do. Not until it’s over.”

“It’s been ages since the wedding, Roman, how much longer is this going to go on?”

Roman makes a vague noise of ‘I don’t know.’

“But—but—“ Logan looks frantically back and forth between them— “surely they can’t all be angry at you, that would be—“

“They’re not,” Roman mumbles, “not all of them, but it’s—it’s most of them.”

“How is that possible?”

“Some of them really don’t like me—“ Roman hisses again— “some of them really like J-Janus or Remus or…or Logan, or Patton—“

“What?”

“What does that have to do with—“

“And some of them just think that it’s—what I did was—“ Roman stifles a whimper, biting his lip— “really bad.”

“But then why…why aren’t the rest of us being affected like this?”

“You’re not the Ego.”

Remus snarls again as Roman jerks, a new bruise blooming on the underside of his neck.

“…ow.”

“We have to get you cleaned up,” Logan mutters shakily, trying to stand.

“Not much point right now,” Roman sighs, absentmindedly nuzzling into Remus, who tightens his grip protectively around Roman, “‘m just gonna get all messy again.”

“Not if we stay with you,” Logan promises, “not if we help.”

“…don’ have to.”

“What the hell are you—“ Virgil shakes his head. “Of course, we’re gonna help you, Roman.”

Roman just looks at them and closes his eyes.

“Ro—kiddo,” Patton says, reaching out for him, “why don’t you believe us?”

“You haven’t exactly…done that before.”

“We didn’t know!”

“You did.”

Patton’s retort dies in his throat. He looks desperately around for something, anything—

Janus is in shock.

Roman…oh, Roman…Janus knew Roman was the Ego, but he didn’t—he hadn’t—

Fuck, were the bruises from what he said still there? Not—not just that awful, awful thing about comparing Roman to Remus, but…from before?

How many times had Janus hurt Roman…and hadn’t cared?

“…I’m sorry, Roman,” Logan murmurs, breaking the silence, “will you let me help now?”

Roman looks up at him. “I’ve been awful to you,” he mumbles, “you don’—don’ have to apologize.”

“Yes, I do,” Logan says, “because you’ve been wonderful to me too…and I am not blameless in this either.”

“But they don’t know that.”

“I do,” Logan says firmly, “and they will.”

The smallest smile tugs at the corners of Roman’s mouth as Logan stands up to go fetch the first aid kit.

“Princey, I—Roman,” Virgil stammers, “fuck, you—oh my god—“

“I’ve been awful to you too, Virgil.”

“And I’ve been fucking worse right back!” Virgil squeezes his hands tight. “And I—you’re the only one who gets yelled at for it. Fuck, I’m—I’m so fucking sorry, I’m gonna—can I help too?”

“…if you want.”

“I’m gonna go help Logan get the shit,” Virgil mutters, getting to his feet and tearing out after Logan.

“…oh, kiddo…”

Patton’s eyes begin to tear up.

“I thought—I thought you needed more time—“

“Don’t beat yourself up over it, Pat,” Roman manages, “it’s not fun, trust me.”

Patton’s laugh comes out more like a sob.

“I won’t hold it against you, and you can—“ Roman hisses again— “help if you want.”

“Do you think you can drink something?”

“…I’ll try.”

Patton’s gone in a flash.

Janus looks at Remus. Remus glares at him and pulls Roman closer.

“…we should…try and get some of that off,” Janus tries, “so we can see what, um…”

Remus’s stony silence as Roman starts to drift again cuts off Janus’s words.

“…Remus…”

“You are very, very lucky,” Remus whispers, cutting him off, “that I’m not about to leave my brother’s side for a long time.”

Janus nods.

“Start on the buttons,” Remus says, “at his wrists. I’m not sure how much of this we can save.”

He immediately sets to work, trying to communicate how sorry, sorry, sorry he is with every gentle brush of his fingers against Roman’s skin. Remus summons something for them to lean Roman against as they start to gingerly remove the tunic. It’s worse than Janus thought.

Roman is one big pulsing wound, little nicks here and there and varying shades of purple, red, green, yellow, all coming from one massive sore in the center of him. As they watch, more injuries appear, little bruises that make his breath hitch, and occasionally a small swipe along his ribs. As Janus works the cuff over his wrist, one of his fingers blackens and swells as it breaks.

“Oh, Roman…”

“Sit up, Ro,” Remus whispers tenderly, peeling and unsticking the tunic from his back, “okay, there we go. Are most of them…up here?”

“They all look to be coming from…that,” Janus says, indicating the giant wound, “so…”

And indeed, as they watch, Roman keens again and the wound deepens, more blood beginning to trickle out.

“Are all of these—“ Janus indicates the injuries littering Roman’s body— “comments?”

“Mm.”

“Then what—why is this one…?”

Roman’s eyes drift closed and his head lolls back.

“’Oh, Roman, thank god you don't have a mustache.”

No.

No.

“’Otherwise, between you and Remus—‘” Roman winces as the wound digs deeper— “‘I wouldn't know who the evil twin is.’”

…no…

Janus reaches out a trembling hand and lays it next to the wound. It’s…it’s warm under his touch but…wrong.

A snarl jerks his hand back and he looks up to see Remus glaring at him.

“Remus—“

“Save it.” Remus glances toward the door. “The others will be back in a moment anyway.”

Sure enough, Logan and Virgil bust through the broken door, their hands full. Logan immediately sweeps his gaze over Roman and kneels down, reaching out.

“May I touch you, Roman?”

“Mm.”

“Thank you.” Logan slots a hand gently behind Roman’s hand. “We’re going to try and get the blood off of you first, alright?”

“Mm.”

“This might sting,” Logan cautions, starting to rub an antiseptic towel down Roman’s arm, “my apologies.”

Virgil takes another one and carefully cleans Roman’s other arm, mindful of his broken finger. As they work, Patton reappears, holding a bottle of water and a glass of juice.

“Come on, kiddo,” he says softly, taking Logan’s place behind Roman’s head, “drink this for me?”

Roman manages a few sips of each.

“Good job, kiddo, there you go…” Patton glances down. “Does it seem to be stopping at all?”

As if it can hear him, the wound starts to bleed again.

“Oh, Roman…”

Logan glances between the wound and Janus, his brow furrowed.

Please, Logan, for once…don’t be so smart.

The way Logan’s eyes widen and narrow say that it’s too late.

“This one seems to be the origin,” Logan says instead, turning away, “all the others seem to stem from it.”

“Okay,” Virgil mutters, “so what’s that one?”

Janus’s mouth runs dry as Logan turns to him expectantly.

“Well,” Remus growls, “go on.”

“I don’t—what if it just makes it worse?”

“That didn’t stop you before.”

“I didn’t—“

“Oh, shut up,” Remus cuts him off, “you knew. You knew.”

“Remus—“

“You wanna know how I know that?” Remus draws away from Roman just enough to clench his fists. “Because I found you after the wedding. You were all curled up on the floor and you were so upset.”

Roman stirs. “…Re…”

“And I asked you why, and you said it was because Roman made fun of your name,” Remus continues, “and I thought: ‘huh, that feels a little weird. Where have I heard that before?’”

Patton shrinks out of Remus’s line of sight.

“Then I remembered! The courtroom,” Remus continues, a manic smile on his face, “and your little plan to make sure Roman felt like he had no idea what was going on.”

“…J, what is he talking about?”

“Oh, he’s not going to tell you,” Remus says, “but I will.”

“Remus—“

“You said that you knew Roman,” Remus says, talking right over him, “and you knew that if you pushed him in the right direction, you’d be able to get him to listen to you easily.”

Even Logan pauses.

“Do you remember what you said, Janny?” Remus’s eyes bore into Janus’s mind. “Do you?”

“…Remus, please.”

Remus’s grin drops.

“You said,” he whispers, “that if you just fucked with his name, he’d be in the palm of your hand.”

And he was.

"Conveniently, everyone seems to have forgotten that. Forgotten what you did. Or they don't care."

Remus tightens his grip on Roman. 

"But not me."

Guilt presses hot and thick against Janus’s throat. Unbidden, huge, fat tears start to form in his eyes as he stares at the wound on Roman’s gasping chest. Distantly, he thinks he can hear the others muttering but all he can think about is how much of this is a lie.

Roman isn’t the evil twin.

Roman isn’t Remus.

Roman isn’t stupid.

Roman isn’t worthless.

Roman isn’t a toy or a puppet or a tool.

Roman isn’t selfish or greedy or arrogant.

Roman is hurt and scared and Janus is so, so sorry.

He lets out a growl of his own and presses his hand hard to the wound.

Lie. Lie.

This is a lie.

Truth is hard and unyielding and painful but nothing is more painful than knowing that all of this is built on a lie.

Janus grits his teeth and concentrates, his hands trembling as he presses it against the wound, searching, searching for—

There.

He closes his fist around the lie and yanks, pulling the words and the hurt and the ache out of Roman’s chest in a bright flash.

When it’s gone, Roman’s chest is heaving, bruises still littering his torso, but the big wound is nowhere to be seen.

Panting, Janus clenches his fist until the lie shatters into pieces, the shard disappearing into harmless puffs of air.

He looks back.

Logan and Patton are staring at him open-mouthed. Virgil has his hands bunched up in his hoodie. Remus just stares at him, his face unreadable.

And Roman…

Roman looks up at him, panting too, but it doesn’t feel quite so wrong anymore.

“I can’t promise that this one won’t hurt you ever anymore,” he vows, “but I can promise that it will never have that much power again.”

Roman reaches out a hand. Janus lets him pull him closer.

“For what it’s worth,” he says, “I’m sorry.”

Janus huffs. “I can also promise that you’re not nearly as sorry as I am.”

They let their eyes fall closed as Janus’s hands steady Roman, landing lightly on his sides and just resting there. Roman tips forward and his forehead lands against Janus’s.

For a second, the room just breathes.

“Can we clean you up,” Janus whispers, “the rest of the way?”

“L-Logan?”

“I’m right here, Roman,” Logan says instantly, “what do you need?”

“Can I—wanna sleep.”

“I don’t think you’ve got a concussion, so that should be alright…” Logan glances at Patton. “Let’s have you drink a little more and then you can rest, hmm?”

“Okay.”

“Come on, kiddo,” Patton coaxes, “here we go…”

As Virgil and Logan set about cleaning again, Janus runs his hands slowly over every injury he can, plucking out what little lies there are and sending them away. He can tell by the weight of Remus’s stare on him that he’s not in the clear yet, but the way Roman starts to sag slowly makes it easier.

“Alright,” Logan murmurs after a while, “I think that’s all we can do.”

“…sleep?”

“Yes, Roman, you can sleep now. Would you like us to help you to your bed?”

Roman blinks, his hand reaching out for— “Re?”

“I gotcha, Ro-Bro.”

“Re…” Roman mumbles sleepily as he all but collapses into Remus.

“…yeah I’m okay with that.”

Logan jerks his head towards Roman’s mattress. Together, they drag it down to the floor and help Remus get Roman onto it. Logan murmurs that he’s going to go put the first aid kit away, but that he’ll be right back. Patton gathers up the glasses and leaves with the same promise.

Virgil glances back and forth between Remus and Janus.

“…you guys remember that this is about what Roman needs, right?”

“Yes.”

“Yeah.”

“Okay good.”

Virgil reaches out to brush a little of Roman’s hair out of his face.

“Well, I’m not going anywhere.”

“Neither am I.”

Logan and Patton reappear at the door and slot themselves in around the mattress. Remus looks at Janus.

Janus deliberately sits between Roman and the door, something he’s seen Remus do too many times.

Remus nods.

This conversation is far from over, but right now…

Right now, Roman mumbles sleepily and grabs onto Remus’s sleeve.

There is truly so much that they never see, isn’t there? Logan wasn’t wrong, the amount of Roman that’s never been on camera is truly staggering.

Janus has let that lie of omission cause too much damage for too long.

Right now, he’s got work to do.

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[cotncandyboifics]

A Lovely Night: Chapter 6

AO3 Link

Masterpost

Chapter 1 ~ Chapter 2 ~ Chapter 3 ~ Chapter 4 ~ Chapter 5

Pairing(s): pre-established roceit & prinxiety, anaroceit, eventual anaroloceit, eventual intruality

Word count: ~4k

Story summary: Roman's boyfriends had had a rivalry since before either of them had actually met Roman. Running a bit late to a date night, Roman accidentally gets them to start dating too.

General CW: non-detailed description of an anxiety attack, non-detailed description of physical pain, food, kissing, potentially triggering descriptions of physical bodies, swearing, caps lock, school settings, s-xual innuendos, slight description of gore(imagery), vague descriptions of anxiety, Implications of an eating disorder, fatigue, dissociation, suppression of stimming, implied heavy restriction (ED), inner monologue-style anxiety description, eating, (will be added to as I write more)

Chapter CW: Implications of an eating disorder, fatigue, dissociation, suppression of stimming, vague description of an anxiety attack, implied heavy restriction (ED), school setting, inner monologue-style anxiety description, food mention, eating, (let me know if i missed anything please!)

Author notes: <<>>

...

Logan did not know what to do with himself. The past week had thrown him off his figurative rhythm far more than he could have possibly anticipated.

First, a lead actor who he'd already been trying his best not to look at - with his accursed pretty hair and handsome face and big muscles - decided to attempt to court him? Logan felt mocked. There is no conceivable possibility that such a beautiful - and might he add, quite pompous and bothersome - man would have any sort of real interest in him, romantically or sexually. He shuddered slightly. He really should have taken the apple his roommate had offered him for breakfast that morning, but it was too late now.

And wouldn't you know, just a week later, a - dare he say - equally pretty man with mesmerizing blonde curls and a cheeky smile takes an interest in him at his own school . After years and years of having never been asked out, no one having taken an even remote interest in him, not one second glance, Logan had two men asking after him in the span of a single week. Men who he found atrociously gorgeous, in fact. Logan pinched the bridge of his nose, glasses riding up his forehead a bit.

This alone would have been enough. But he just had to go into that little sewing shop for his dear friend Patton's birthday present, and that boy with the purple bangs who stumbled over his words and his feet was completely and undeniably flustered by Logan's presence. Perhaps he was simply experiencing an ego boost from his two previous encounters that week with pretty men, but he felt that the attraction the boy seemed to have for him was unmistakable.

And now here he was, pacing down the sidewalk toward the library, headed off to meet - Janus, if he recalled correctly - for their first study session. He didn't know what the hell he'd been thinking when he asked to meet Janus again, the very next day no less... perhaps he felt the need to seize the moment while it was present, or however the saying goes. Regardless, while his actions had been quite uncharacteristically spontaneous, he saw no logical purpose in redacting his decision; Janus seemed to be an individual with plentiful intellect, and studying with fellow students had generally proved to be a beneficial tactic in Logan's (albeit minimal) experience and (far less minimal) research. Meeting with Janus, even if it wound up simply being this once, should be no different.

Logan avidly ignored any simmering feelings that he wanted something more than to spend time with Janus just this once.

He was shaken from his thoughts when his phone started ringing in his pocket. He examined the screen, noting the time - 2:49 PM, he wasn't late for his engagement with Janus just yet - as he checked who was calling. It was an unknown number, but the area code was local. Logan frowned, pressing the answer button.

"Greetings, Logan Lattimer speaking."

-

Virgil was kind of panicking.

His boyfriends each happened to meet this super-cute space-nerd guy in the span of a week, and the second they'd talked to him they were all heart-eyes. Not that Virgil was complaining; the guy sounded really cute.

He knew first hand now, that he was in fact super cute . That was the problem.

Virgil's lunch break came and went, most of which he spent gnawing vaguely at a sandwich and staring anxiously at the contact card that had been in Logan's wallet. It simply had his full name and phone number on it, nothing else. He tapped it on the desk in front of him, glancing between the numbers and his own phone, set face-up beside his elbow.

And then his lunch break had ended, and he had several more hours of worrying before he had to convince himself to call Logan.

Something occurred to him, during those hours. Should he tell his boyfriends?

What would he even say? There wasn't much to tell, at least not that warranted calling them before he got home. If he was going to make any calls, there was one he was under obligation to make first. And if he were to seek comfort in them for his obligation, what would they say?

Roman was probably the lesser option; he'd been whining about Logan all week, and now that he knew Janus was meeting with him again today, tensions were especially high. He'd be no help whatsoever, Virgil was sure of it.

And speaking of Janus meeting Logan again today... that also meant no. Calling your boyfriend who was about to see the guy you were nervous to call made the situation all kinds of awkward. No, everything would be easier if he'd simply call him.

So, shaking his shoulders out a bit, he did. He stepped into the break room, grabbed his phone and the contact card, and dialed the number.

His thumb hovered over the call button for a few seconds too long. He cursed under his breath and looked away as he pressed it, bringing the phone to his ear. it rang twice, and then a slight static preceded a familiar voice.

"Greetings, Logan Lattimer speaking."

Virgil was glad he'd drew in a breath to hold when he'd pressed the call button, because he wasn't sure he could recall how to breathe properly.

"Hey, this is Virgil, um, from the knitting supply shop? Uh, you kinda left your wallet here..." Virgil managed to cough, voice not breaking as much as it could have. His chest felt cold and constricted, and he wrapped one arm around himself to fight off the burn of the icy spears stabbing through his lungs.

"Ah, hello Virgil. I am currently on my way to a separate engagement, however it should not take long. At what time would it be acceptable for me to return to your place of business to retrieve my belongings?"

"Oh, uh- I'll be here till four," Virgil stuttered a bit, surprised at how fast Logan jumped to planning mode, as well as realizing he knew the precise nature of the so-called separate engagement Logan was about to attend.

"That is adequate. I will make sufficient efforts to arrive before that time. See you then."

With that, the line disconnected, and Virgil was overwhelmed by the eerie silence of the break room. He glanced at a half-empty box of donuts their manager had brought in yesterday.

He could have said that the shop actually closed at six, and that Logan could get his wallet from Emile, but his train of thought hadn’t been screwed on properly when he’d been speaking, so he could grant himself a little slack- wait, he was mixing his metaphors now...

Suddenly, the door swung open, Emile peeking out from behind it.

"Virgil, could you get back out here? We've got a little rush," and he ducked out, gone as quickly as he’d arrived.

Virgil sighed, shuddering away his anxieties, grabbing a donut hole and popping it into his mouth before heading out to join his colleague.

-

Janus was sitting at a table set between the rows of shelves, reading pensively beneath a subtle desk lamp where Logan found him. He glanced up and smiled gently when Logan arrived, who set his things down beside a chair opposite from Janus'.

"Apologies, Janus, but I must cut our studying session short in about 45 minutes - i left my wallet at a nearby shop this morning, and must retrieve it before 4pm." Janus' eyes sparked with something Logan couldn't place, and he hid a smirk behind steepled gloved fingers. Logan gulped imperceptibly. "Perhaps we can set up another time to study as well- um, to make up for it, I mean?" He rushed his words out in a short breath, running his fingers through his hair to collect himself. Janus' smirk broadened very slightly, and Logan found himself watching the lines of Janus’ face as they shifted.

"It would be my pleasure." Janus averted his eyes for a moment, eyebrows furrowing slightly as he thought. “Perhaps we should exchange information, so that I might- so that we can settle on a proper time for another engagement.” Janus reached into his inner coat pocket, producing his phone and tapping away for a moment, before passing it to Logan. He took it carefully, recognizing a blank contact screen, and quickly entering his information into it. He handed the phone back to Janus with a tight smile, and Janus returned it, sliding his phone back into the same pocket before resettling himself in his seat more properly.

Janus set aside his book to pull out a few textbooks for their critical thinking class. "If we are cutting our study session that precisely short, that would provide me with a chance to surprise-" He faltered for a moment, tone changing, though it was so subtle Logan almost thought he'd imagined it - "a friend of mine after his shift. Now, where did your class get to in the lecture today?" He started thumbing through the pages of a particularly thick but small book, holding it by the spine with one hand.

"Ah... Professor Cauley was stopped short on page 461 when he became distracted with his electric pencil sharpener malfunctioning, and class ended a few moments later. He did inform us that the other class had made it to page 465, so if you need me to catch up to you, it should only take me a few minutes." Logan was rifling through the pages of his textbook intently, not noticing Janus' surprised expression.

Janus reached a hand out, cautiously setting his hand on Logan's wrist, just beneath his wristwatch. "Don't fret," he breathed, "it appears we share the same class period. If I recall correctly, Professor Cauley’s face went positively red with rage, and he nearly broke the poor sharpener worse as he tried to unjam it." Janus chuckled shyly through his words as Logan met his eyes, smiling after a moment.

“Fascinating. I wonder how I have not noticed you in class before?” Logan tilted his head very slightly, and noticed something swimming warmly in Janus’ eyes. They were quite a very lovely golden brown, he thought.

Janus shifted, looking down to adjust his own texts, but the smirk that was growing less snarky by the second never left his lips. “It is a rather large class. It can be easy to lose faces in the crowd. I’m not sure I can pick out more than three people with whom I share that  class if they were to pass me in the halls. But no matter.” Janus glanced at Logan’s textbook and notes, readying his pencil. “Shall we begin?”

-

Logan was talking animatedly as he hunched himself over his notes, Janus glancing up to watch his face behind its shield of deep brown bangs intermittently as he scribbled in his own notebook to (at least attempt to) keep up. Janus’ gaze was averted, however, when a repetitive chime sounded from Logan’s phone, sitting face down on the desk just beside his right forearm. He stopped mid-sentence, adjusting his posture and picking his phone up, flipping it over to view the screen. He sighed, deflating slightly, as he tapped the screen once, setting the phone back down.

“My apologies, Janus, but it appears that it is time for me to depart.” Logan stood, a colder, sharper version of himself taking the place of the one that holds a deep passion for learning. The beautiful ice crystal, despite its beauty, is still the twin of the icy shards that cut sharper than knives or spears, Janus thought.

Janus stood swiftly, joining Logan in his gathering of his personal belongings, shoveling his own texts into his own bag. “It is quite alright, I assure you, Logan.” They met eyes as Janus spoke Logan’s name, and Janus could swear he saw a subtle, blotchy pink settle in Logan’s cheeks. “I’ll be headed down Main Street, then. Perhaps-” Logan cleared his throat, glaring down and to the side at nothing in particular as he retried his statement. “I will be expecting to hear from you, Janus.” They walked side by side out the front of the library, stopping just past the doors to say their goodbyes. But Janus had a small realization, and felt the creeping suspicion crawling its way up his sides returning. He resisted the urge to shake or twitch it away, grinding his teeth a bit.

Instead of continuing to suppress his stimming, he cleared his throat, speaking to Logan. "I am headed down Main Street as well. I hope it is not out of- I hope that it isn’t inappropriate for me to ask, but...will you allow me to accompany you?" Janus asked, nearly moving to offer his arm to Logan, but deciding quickly that that was far too forward. He settled on spreading an arm out, gesturing to the concrete path before them that led to the sidewalk.

Logan offered a small smile. "That would be adequate, and not inappropriate in the slightest. I, I would enjoy your company.” A beat of silence, and Logan cleared his throat. “Just this way," and Logan set off, at an impressively brisk pace that Janus nearly had a hard time keeping up with, having been caught off guard.

They walked in stride with one another as they made their way down the street. Janus became increasingly suspicious of the scenario the closer they got to the sewing shop. From what he knew of Logan's situation, there was no conflicting evidence that would disqualify the possibility that Logan was headed, in fact, toward Virgil's workplace. Janus held his breath when they turned onto the very same block, watching Logan's body language soften as they did.

Janus took a deep breath, glancing at the sign of the sewing shop a pace or two ahead.

"Logan, there's something I wish to discuss with-"

Janus glanced at the sewing shop's sign once more as they passed, but didn't move to stop before the door until he realized Logan had done so, standing a bit stiff a few paces back.

"This would be the establishment I spoke of," Logan's eyes looked a bit hazed, vaguely pointed towards the door handle. He seemed not to have heard Janus’ beginnings of a confession. Janus’ eyebrow quirked ever so slightly.

"Interesting," he breathed quietly, and Logan met his eyes then. "Allow me." Janus reached a gloved hand out to open the door for Logan, bowing slightly as he held it open.

"Much appreciated," Logan commented, stepping through the doorway smoothly.

-

Virgil was sitting slouched behind the counter, typing random numbers into the cash register out of boredom. He was half considering going to bother Emile, but he was busy doing inventory. And besides, Virgil needed to stay behind the register in case any customers came in. One person behind the counter at all times, that was the rule. He sighed, bringing his hand to his face and tapping on the tip of his nose absentmindedly.

The bell chimed, and Virgil looked up from behind his mop of purple hair. His heart gave a few beats a bit harder than usual, and he felt his throat constrict slightly.

There was Logan again. And the whole rest of the world became background noise.

The line of Logan's mouth widened, creating a crease or two on each side. Virgil realized that not only was he staring at Logan's lips, but as well that Logan was smiling. At him.

"Hello, Virgil," He spoke softly.

"Hi," Virgil practically coughed, the scratch in his throat making it borderline painful to speak. "H-how was your, your day?" Virgil asked, pursing his lips as soon as his words had left them.

Logan inhaled, raising his eyebrows and averting his eyes from Virgil's intense brown ones. "It has been satisfactory." The door chimed again behind Logan as it shut, and Virgil suddenly recognized that there was another person in the room. A person whose presence felt immediately familiar...

"Ah, my apologies," Logan stepped to the side slightly, allowing the person to come into full view. There, with a small sheepish smile, stood Janus. "Allow me to introduce-"

"Logan, dear, that won't be necessary," Janus rested a gentle gloved hand on Logan's shoulder, and Virgil couldn't tell if he was about to pass out from gay panic or just regular panic. "We are... quite well acquainted." Janus smiled tenderly to Virgil, and Virgil's whirring brain slowed if only slightly. He was safe.

…but… was he though?

-

"Oh, is this the friend you spoke of earlier, whom you meant to come and meet? How coincidental, that we were on our way to meet the same person without either of us having any prior knowledge of it." Logan was caught up in his fascination so much that he did not notice Virgil beginning to hyperventilate, knuckles white as he gripped the counter, or the way Janus was watching, practically frozen.

But, as Logan's commentary came to a close, it was as though a flip switched inside Janus’ mind, and he quickly strode around Logan. He stepped quickly behind the counter and over to Virgil, all while nearly whispering little nothings like "oh oh oh," "hush now love," and "come here dear."

Logan's brain took a moment to catch up, and soon he was simply standing there, watching as Virgil clung to Janus' coat rather desperately. Virgil’s body shuddered in silent sobs as Janus wrapped his arms around him, tight and secure. Janus was still whispering to him, but it was inaudible to Logan now.

Logan didn't quite know what to do, and so he just stood there, feeling rather stuck for a long time. At some point, he set his backpack and the gift bag he'd gotten from this very store earlier that day down against the counter on the floor, folding his hands before him. At some point, he registered Janus giving him an apologetic look, which confused him.

And then Janus kissed Virgil on the forehead, pulling back slightly to look him in the eyes. Logan thought from the way Janus was nodding softly and the way their chests moved together, that they may be doing a breathing exercise. He couldn't focus on much else, so he tried to follow along and copy them as well. 4, 7, 8. 4, 7, 8.

Sooner than later, Janus was leading Virgil carefully back out around the counter, both looking slightly worse for wear, but at least Virgil was far calmer. Janus smiled meekly at Logan again, and he still couldn't quite understand what was happening. It appeared that Virgil had had an anxiety attack, but the way Janus had rushed to comfort him so quickly, the way he seemed to know exactly what to do-

"Here you go, Logan," Virgil's voice was a bit scratchy as he reached out his hand, Logan's familiar black leather wallet between his pale fingers. Logan cleared his throat.

"Thank you," He spoke a bit more quietly than he meant to. He suddenly felt his headache flare again in full force, and had to fight not to shake as he reached his hand out to retrieve his wallet from Virgil's hands. He barely succeeded, but Virgil seemed to notice something amiss - he was watching Logan's wary eyes with some mix of suspicion and concern.

Janus, however, had been staring at the floor, and did not notice Logan's onset of fatigue. He sighed, clearing his throat softly. "Logan, I suppose you deserve some kind of explanation. One I tried to give before we’d come in, but regardless." Suddenly Virgil's eyes were on Janus, and far wider than Logan thought possible. Janus just glanced at him, nodding gently, and Virgil's shoulders visibly relaxed. "Virgil and I are..."

Janus laced their fingers together, and Logan's vision went blurry, everything around him fading to static fuzz as he tried to remember to breathe. He'd eaten more than enough today for this to be happening, surely? ...Had he eaten today? He couldn’t recall. He could always remember ... He vaguely registered Janus still speaking in the background, but he couldn't care enough to force himself to refocus. He got the jist. He and Virgil were romantically involved, and Janus was interested in nothing more than a friendship with Logan. That was perfectly fine. He didn't mind. He forced away the roiling feeling in his gut and gulped down the sting starting to tingle in his eyes, forcing himself to nod.

"Understood," He blurted, voice a bit raspy. He turned toward the door, reaching for the handle. Before he fully exited, he threw over his shoulder, "I look forward to seeing you later this week, Janus. And thank you again, Virgil." And with that, he was gone.

He made his way down the block briskly, trying to shake the haze that clouded his vision. The only thing he could think to do was go and see Patton. He knew nothing worked magic on his body like a good black coffee.

-

"Virgil and I are..." Virgil looked down as Janus laced their fingers together, and looked back to Logan, whose face seemed to have gone paler than it normally was, which was quite horrifying to see. Considering Logan was already so white that his skin tone bordered on inhuman, now it was devoid of any pricks of red coloring and looked almost like an empty tinted gray, pronouncing his cheekbones and eye bags even more so. Janus looked between them, continuing after a moment, "...we have been romantically involved for several years now, and even longer with our partner Roman, who you may recall from the community theatre? He's expressed to us that he's quite taken with you, in fact... And I know this may be a lot to spring on you right now, but I thought you deserved to know... it felt wrong to pursue anything with you romantically when we- when you didn't have the facts straight, and even regardless, it's important for you to know that all three of us are-"

"Understood," Logan cut Janus off, nodding. He didn't speak harshly, in fact his voice was quite quiet, but it was curt and forward as Logan always was, and so cut through Janus' words like a frozen blade.

Janus looked at him in awe, and opened his mouth to speak, but Virgil gripped his arm before he did. Logan was already at the door. He glanced over his shoulder, but didn’t really look at either of them. "I look forward to seeing you later this week, Janus. And thank you again, Virgil." Janus and Virgil watched as Logan walked out the door and straight down the sidewalk through the shop window.

Emile, who apparently had been standing there for at least a few moments, cleared his throat awkwardly. Janus and Virgil looked at him in unison, matching exasperated looks on their faces.

"U-um, Virgil, I was just gonna check in, see if you've clocked off." Emile wrung his wrists between his fingers awkwardly.

"Um, no not yet," Virgil bit the corner of his lip, muttering a 'sorry' as he stepped past Emile and paced quickly to the back room to clock off. Janus stared blankly at the floor where his boyfriend had just been, eyebrows knit in thought.

"You feeling a-okay there, Janus?" Emile dipped his head a bit to get Janus' attention gently. Janus blinked a few times, engaging with Emile as he re-centered himself in the present moment.

"Yes, Emile, I'm fine, thank you," Janus rubbed his gloved palm with his thumb anxiously. He couldn't think of anything to add, so Emile smiled carefully, nodding and stepping away to resume whatever busywork he needed to attend to.

Virgil was back again shortly, his backpack slung over his shoulder. He gave Janus a strange look, some kind of combination of pity and sadness and confusion. At least, that's how it looked to Janus.

"Ready to...?" Virgil gestured vaguely towards the door, leaning into Janus' personal space a bit. Janus offered him his arm, clearing his throat and holding his chin high.

"Yes, love. Let's get home to Roman."

As they walked to the bus stop together, neither had any clue what they’d say to their Prince. He’d be distraught, they were both sure, and significantly more so than he already was, which would be… intense. Janus squeezed Virgil’s hand in his own slightly, and smiled somberly at him sideways.

They’d figure this out. They always did, eventually.

Janus took his time on the bus typing out a message to Logan, Virgil watching from the seat beside him as his head laid on Janus’ shoulder. Janus settled on something simple.

To: Logan L It's Janus. I'd love to meet up to study, or perhaps discuss other things, some time this week. Let me know if Thursday or Friday works better for you.

[lily-janus]

Someone Like You - Chapter 5

Chapter 1 | chapter 2 | chapter 3 | chapter 4 | next

Summary: Janus and his dad are both hurt and haunted by their past, it's time they'll talk about it with each other, and what's a better time than 2 in the morning?

Pairing: past anxceit, pre romantic roceit

Warnings: grief, mentions of past accident and death, regret, self deprecation, disability, insomnia. Let me know if there's anything I missed.

Word count: 1,416

Hey folks! Sorry for the late update, this week was hectic for me omg. But I'm here to deliver you another unhealthy dose of angst horray! @prince-rowan-of-the-forest

Just stop thinking about him…

Stop thinking about Virgil…

He doesn't matter anymore…

You don't need him…

Janus turned in his bed, it was hard enough to find a position where his left leg hurt the least, but now he was so restless he couldn't stop moving and turning.

Why the fuck did he agree to go there? What was he thinking? All it did was bring back all the pain he spent so much time trying to push down…

It's not fair how Virgil can hurt him even when he's not there while he gets to laugh with his new friends and kiss Roman's soft lips whenever he pleases and-

No, that's not the time to be thinking of this… he needs to sleep…

Ugh who is he kidding? He's not going to sleep tonight…

With a sigh, he got up and went to get himself some water and maybe a - he checked the time - 2am snack.

When he got to the kitchen, however, it wasn't as dark and empty as he expected. His dad was sitting at the table, looking at a photo that, even though Janus couldn't see it, was obviously of his mom.

So, it's going to be one of these nights it seems… great.

"Hey dad.." Janus said softly but his dad still jumped in surprise.

"Oh! H-hwy buddy! What are you doing up?" His dad put up a smile that wasn't fooling any of them.

Janus raised an eyebrow, "I can ask you the same question… been thinking about her?" He asked softly.

His dad let out an empty chuckle, shaking his head, "I always think about her… I never stopped… but yeah, I am.." he admitted, his barely-put-together cheerful persona falling away to reveal his sad and tired face.

He gestured weakly for Janus to sit next to him and they both stared at the picture in silence for a long moment. The three of them laughing and covered in mud on the floor.

Janus remembered that day, it was the day before the accident… it just finished raining and the sun was coming out of the clouds, making a beautiful rainbow. Janus' mom insisted they'll go out and take a picture with it so they rushed outside, his dad bringing their old camera and setting it up. They all posed but at the last second, Janus' dad slipped on the mud, making all three of them fall with him and they all burst into laughter right when the timer went down and the camera clicked.

Janus stared at himself in that picture, happy and healthy and… normal. Sometimes he forgets he ever was that… normal. His father's sigh broke him out of his thoughts.

"I should have been there…" he said quietly.

Janus held back his tears at the sound of his dad's regretful tone, "don't… it doesn't help anything… it just hurts you when you think like that… we can't change what happened."

"I know… I know you're right… but the feeling is still there… I yelled at her…" he trailed off with a sob, "my last moments with her were spent arguing over stupid things that don't matter… don't mean anything like you two mean to me…" he buried his face in his hands, taking shaky breaths. "What would she think of me now…"

Janus laid a hand on his father's trembling shoulders, "you're doing your best, she would love you for it… just like I do."

His dad relaxed back into the chair, leaning his head over his son's shoulder and relaxing slowly. "Thank you, son… that means a lot.."

They stayed that way for a long moment, before his dad lifted his head to look at Janus, "and why are you up?"

Janus sighed, he was hoping to avoid this question… "just thoughts… won't stop pestering me, ya know?" He tried but it was clear his dad wasn't buying it.

He took a deep breath, "...I went to Virgil's the other day…" he started. He never actually told his dad what happened between them, but the man was smart enough and knew him well enough to have a pretty good guess of the reason behind Virgil's sudden disappearance. "...and now I can't stop thinking about him again.." he admitted.

His father nodded in understanding, "I see… you never really told what happened between you two." He said carefully.

Normally, Janus would brush off the question, but his dad seems to need a distraction like this right now and it's not like it's some big secret… he can't stop thinking about it now anyway so might as well tell someone.

So, Janus took a deep breath, "there's not much to tell, really… one day he just stopped answering my texts… he stopped being in our usual meeting stops… then, a week or so later… I see him hanging with the popular group at our school. Not even meeting my eyes… I just can't stop wondering what I could have possibly done or said that drove him away like that… was he only my friend because he thought I was his only choice?"

Janus didn't realize he was crying until his dad reached out and wiped the tears from his cheeks, "I'm sorry son, that's awful." He hugged him gently.

Janus sniffed and sighed, "I probably deserved it…" he said quietly.

His dad pulled away to look him in the eyes, "no, you didn't, what Virgil did was not okay, you hear me?" He said firmly.

Janus nodded weakly and his dad gave him a comforting smile. "Come on, we both need to go to bed."

And they each got up and went to their rooms to try and get some sleep before the sun came up.

…

He woke up to his phone ringing.

Frowning, he pulled the phone off the charger and looked to see who was calling him.

He almost dropped his phone when he saw it was Roman of all people. Does it have something to do with their project? But it's sunday, couldn't that wait until they see each other at school on monday?

Mind racing, he nervously answered and put the phone to his ear, "hello?"

Silence.

"Roman?"

"...are you okay?"

Janus frowned, looking at the clock, "you woke me up at 8 in the morning on sunday just to ask me that?"

"Sorry I just felt really bad over what happened at Virgil's and I just had to see how you were doing…"

Janus was glad it was a phone call and that Roman couldn't see his blush, "w-what do you have to feel bad about? It's between me and Virg-"

"I know but I knew you had a history and I still convinced you to go and I'm so sorry, I didn't think it would be so painful for you…"

Roman started bubbling as Janus just sat there, stunned, "...you… blame yourself on yesterday?" He asked suddenly, making Roman stop.

"Um… yes? I guess it's kinda dumb huh?" He heard Roman chuckle awkwardly.

"No it's… actually sweet…" Janus thought to himself with heated cheeks.

"What?"

Janus suddenly realized he said it out loud and hung up immediately, heart racing. What the fuck is he doing?

He waited anxiously to see if Roman would call again, but when nothing happened, he sighed in relief and went downstairs to start on making breakfast for him and his dad.

…

"Someone is up early, it smells amazing here." His father greeted him a few hours later as he walked into the kitchen, "can I help with anything?"

Janus turned from the pan on the stove to raise an eyebrow at his dad, "last time you 'helped' I almost had to call the fire department."

"Hey! That was not my fault! The instructions were very confusing!" His dad protested with a grin.

Janus just shook his head with a smile and turned back to the pancakes he was in the middle of making.

They were just about to sit down to eat when a knock was heard from the door.

With a sigh, Janus grubbed his cane and went to answer it.

He was feeling strangely better today. He never imagined telling his dad what happened would make much of a difference but… it really did. It still hurt, but it was more dull than before… weird.

He opened the door and nearly dropped his cane when he saw who it was.

"Um… hey…" said Virgil awkwardly, "c-can we talk?"

[prince-rowan-of-the-forest]

Assassination? (chapter 2)

----

Roman has been asleep for three and a half days, that doesn't make Janus' companions any more welcoming towards him when he wakes up.

----

| Ao3 | Previous part |

Warnings: None that I'm aware of, other than Virgil being kinda a dick.

Pairings: pre-romantic roceit,

Word count: 3319

Notes:

Honestly I wasn't sure I was going to make a part two for this, I might write a third part, to get a real insight into their flirting and being cute whilst on the road, this one's more just a 'direct aftermath' lol.

I would like to put out a warning now that I might not be able to update every week from here on, since I have exams from now until late June. I do still have a bunch of chapters pre-written for the anaroceit Royalty au though, so whenever I don't have something new finished, I'll probably post that!

Also I will be putting out a poll this week, I just completely forgot about it, lol.

Please enjoy!

It had been three days since they left the city and Roman still hadn’t woken up. Janus’ trio had picked up the reward for the prince’s assassination (carefully hiding Roman under blankets and bags while they did so) and hadn’t stopped travelling since. Word of the prince’s death travelled just as fast as they did, though, and no matter where they stopped someone was talking about it. The flying rumours made it difficult to stop anywhere for long, especially with the still breathing prince himself concealed in their wagon, so they’d been taking turns to sleep on the road instead. At least things should get easier when Roman wakes up.

Janus wouldn’t say aloud that he was worried about the prince - three days was far too long to be asleep - but he was also certain that Virgil and Logan had picked up on his stiffness regardless. It didn’t help much that Virgil was still angry with him for kidnapping the prince in the first place and Logan was irritated that they now had to take all sorts of detours to avoid villages that did wagon checks to make sure no-one checking for illegal produce found him or guards who might spot the prince and raise the alarms. 

He didn’t blame them for being upset with him, really. He had messed up the mission and put all three of them in danger by bringing the prince here. But at the same time… those amber eyes still haunted his dreams and Janus really hoped the prince would wake up soon…

—

Roman woke up slowly to bright light behind his still closed eyelids and a painful, throbbing headache hammering at the inside of his skull. He felt groggy, like his mind was stuffed with cotton wool and he was floating through a vat of honey. His limbs were heavy, feeling more like blocks of wood than arms and legs, and his mouth was dry as sandpaper. 

As his senses slowly returned, Roman registered that he was wrapped in some form of blanket, all the way around like a cocoon, up to his neck. His head rested on something lumpy, a little scratchy against his cheek and just left of firm. Stupidly, Roman’s foggy mind provided the idea that… he definitely wasn’t in his bedroom back at the castle. 

Slowly, as he laid there with his eyes still closed, Roman began to piece together the memories of what had happened. His mind still felt as though it was stuffed with wool, but slowly he put together the puzzle, an assassin, the vial of poison, the deal, multi-colored eyes - blue and yellow - snake scales that had glistened in the candlelight…

Part of him had expected Janus to bail on him. It would have made sense, he could have ran whilst Roman was asleep, it would have been the most logical thing to do. He would've gotten his reward and been able to move on. That same part of him hadn’t even minded the idea. Poison - or even a knife to the throat, if Janus had so chosen - whilst he was sleeping wouldn't have been the worst way to go.

But nevermind all that, because Roman was apparently not dead, just… incredibly uncomfortable. 

When he did eventually manage to move his limbs - starting with just a twitch of his finger - he realised that not only did he feel stiff and like all his joints had locked up, but he ached basically everywhere, his shoulders, his back, his legs and arms, his neck. It left him wondering just how long he had slept for - and where. He could smell the barest hint of salt in the air. Maybe they were by the ocean? 

Roman took a deep breath - he really could do with some water right around now - and peeled open his eyes only to shut them again when the blaring sun above him made the pounding in his head almost double. When he slowly opened his eyes again, he saw not the sun this time, but an unfamiliar face staring back at him which… least to say startled him quite a bit. 

Roman was pretty sure he was tall, though he couldn’t quite tell exactly how tall, considering he was lying on what was likely the floor and this guy was standing almost directly over him, which… a little weird, but he already knew this wasn’t going to be like what he was used to. That was fine. His hair was long and unkempt, scraggly black mixed with purple and a little dull green and blue, skin pale as milk and a little sunken with eyes that looked a little too big on his face and were an almost ghostly pale blue. Roman found himself thinking he looked pretty creepy before correcting his thoughts, sure he looked a little creepy, but that was just because he was different from Roman. He wouldn’t let his parents' biases speak for him here. 

Though the way he was silently and unblinkingly staring at him was starting to become increasingly unsettling regardless.

Roman shifted, attempting to ease the ache in his neck, and the stranger seemed to come out of a trance, turning away and yelling something that Roman’s brain refused to comprehend with his throbbing headache and the stranger’s unfamiliar accent. 

Whilst they were gone, Roman tried to sit up and found that it just made his head spin and throb even more. He settled instead for stretching out his limbs and trying to regain feeling in the rest of his body. 

Moments later, something was pressed into his hand by another unfamiliar figure, this person was crouched next to him, so he couldn’t discern his height in comparison to the other stranger, what he could discern was the strangers blue-tinted dark skin, dotted with silver freckles, his eyes like pools of murky blue water and hair resembling what Roman thought might be seaweed which also seemed to be dripping with water. After a glance Roman realised the object in his hand was a waterskin, which he went to drink before a thought struck him.

“Why should I-” Roman coughed at the dry feeling of his throat as he tried to swallow, he’d really like some of that water, but he didn’t fake his death and escape the palace just to get poisoned for real, “Why should I trust this? I don’t- I don’t know you, where is Jay?”

Roman thought it would be best to use the cover name Janus had given him. He knew how unwise it was to give out your true name to suspicious creatures you couldn’t pinpoint the identity of, especially ones you didn’t know.

“Jay is currently out getting supplies,” The one with seaweed for hair told him, “And this is just water, but you should sit up to drink it or you’ll choke.”

“How do I know you haven’t poisoned it,” Roman narrowed his eyes at the stranger, he still felt a little woozy, but the sensation was ebbing away by the second thank goodness. The first stranger appeared standing behind him with folded arms and a scowl on his face.

“Just drink the damn water,” He said, “It’s not poisoned, Jay made us swear not to hurt you.”

Roman… still didn’t trust that, but while he wasn’t sure how long he had been asleep, he did know that he felt like he’d been stuck in a desert for a week and the waterskin in his hand was looking more and more tempting every moment. Eventually - under one’s passive gaze and the other’s scrutinising glare - Roman slowly pushed himself up into a sitting position and tilted his head back to drink the water. It tasted normal, as water should, thank goodness. He must have drank half the waterskin in one go before looking back at the pair of strangers. Somehow the pale one looked even more annoyed now. He wondered distantly what he had done to offend the guy. 

“You may call me Lo,” The blue one said, and after a moment that made it clear the other wasn’t going to offer a name, he spoke again, “He’s Vi.”

Roman opened his mouth to offer a nickname they could use for him too, before ‘Vi’ cut him off, “We already know who you are, Princey.”

“Princey?” Roman asked, with an offended gasp.

“Yeah, cuz’ you’re the prince?” Vi said, raising an eyebrow as if to say ‘are you stupid?’.

“No I get it-” Roman huffed, already irritated, “Just-”

“What?” Vi said, “Don’t like it? Well deal with it, just like I have to deal with you.”

With that, he turned around and walked away, hopping down from wherever they were right now. Roman watched him walk over to the large horse that was tied up to a post there and begin angrily brushing her fur. Eventually, Roman turned back to Lo, hoping to communicate all his questions with his expression alone. 

“Vi is- a little prickly towards strangers in general,” Lo explained softly, “And, no offence, but neither he nor I are very happy that you are here, he is simply more overt about it.”

“I get it,” Roman shrugged, “I’m supposed to be dead.”

“Yes,” Lo said, pushing a pair of silver glasses up his nose, “You are.”

“Right,” Roman said with a sigh, so this was just going from one miserable existence where everyone hated him to a slightly less comfortable existence where almost everyone still hated him. Wonderful, Roman was really glad he made this decision now.

“Yes, Jay insisted we keep you around and that we do nothing to harm you,” Lo explained, “But please refrain from causing us trouble, or I may have to rethink my agreement.”

Roman shivered as Lo stood and walked away towards Virgil, well, that was terrifying.

All he could really do now was sit here and hope that Jay would be back soon and also hope that Jay following the plan and making Lo and Vi swear not to hurt him meant that he at least didn’t hate Roman like the other two seemed to. Roman wasn’t sure how long getting supplies typically took, but he really hoped it wasn’t too long. He wasn’t sure how much longer he could stand the scathing glances Vi kept shooting his way as he talked quietly with Lo over by the horse. 

Growing up, Roman had learned all too well how to tell where he was not welcome, and he was most definitely not welcome here.

—-

It was approaching sundown by the time Janus got back to their makeshift camp. He hadn’t intended to be out for so long, but he had struggled finding a few certain items they desperately needed - one being a certain lotion for his scales. He’d also gotten some extra clothes for the prince, because while he absolutely was not comfortable changing his clothes whilst he was sleeping (Janus thought that would be a horrific breach of privacy) he was sure Roman would want something to change into from the gala outfit he was still wearing when he woke up. 

When he did arrive back to camp, Virgil approached him almost immediately, looking stormier than usual. 

Janus very quickly found out why.

“Your prince is awake,” Virgil told him shortly, “he’s already annoying.”

“Don’t judge him so quickly,” Janus said, inwardly relieved, so he had woken up, finally. He was a little annoyed that he hadn’t been here, but it didn’t matter. 

“Just because you want to get into his pants, doesn’t mean the rest of us do, Jay,” Virgil said, crossing his arms, but pointing towards the path that leads further towards the cliffs, “He walked off that way, dunno where he went.”

“You weren’t keeping an eye on him?” Janus asked, frowning.

“I’m not babysitting a stupid adult royal,” Virgil told him, practically glowring now, “He’s your responsibility, you brought him here.”

Janus just huffed, rolling his eyes and passing one of the bags - with all the supplies for the group - to Virgil, keeping the bag with his own things and the clothes he had gotten for Roman in his hand and stormed off down the coastal path.

Really, he hoped this rift that he’d caused between them by bringing Roman here would fix itself soon. He hoped Virgil would warm up to the prince - though he doubted it would happen for a while. Either way, Virgil would have to get used to it, it’s not like they could just abandon Roman now.

The trail was winding and overgrown. The wind picked up as he approached the coast too, ruffling his hair and tugging at his clothes. It was getting dark - though he couldn’t deny that the sunset looked beautiful - and with night came cold. He really hoped he found Roman soon. He couldn’t help a pang of annoyance towards his companions for letting him walk off. 

Luck must be on his side, though, because as he approached the cliffs his eyes caught on the bright red, gold and white of Roman’s clothes where the prince was sitting in the grass, knees pulled up to his chest and chin set atop them. Janus sighed softly and walked over, of course Roman was upset, he’d woken up somewhere unfamiliar surrounded by unfriendly - and possibly outright hostile, in Virgil’s case - strangers. No wonder he’d run off.

“Hey,” Janus said softly, though loud enough to be heard over the wind, “May I sit?”

“Jay?” Roman said, looking up, and looking immediately relieved, “Oh, you’re back.”

“Indeed I am, I hope the others didn’t cause you much trouble,” Janus said, though he’d known Virgil long enough to know how he would have reacted to Roman anyway. The way Roman sighed and looked away again told him everything he needed to know.

“Your companions do not like me,” Roman said, uncurling from his position just a little, “But I understand why.”

Janus hummed, not having an answer to that. He had to remind himself that he barely knew Roman, he didn’t know what he was truly like, didn’t know his mannerisms or how he would react to certain things. It made it difficult to interact, and was the main reason Janus didn’t like strangers in general. He thought he should try, though. Especially with this one.

“How are you feeling?” Janus asked, “You were asleep for a while.”

“I have a pounding headache,” Roman said, reaching to rub at his forehead for emphasis, “And I’m incredibly hungry, otherwise fine, how long was I out for?”

“Three and a half days,” Janus told him, “There should be food back at camp, if you want it?”

“I’d rather stay here,” Roman said, looking back up at him, he was sad to see that the fire in his eyes had dimmed slightly, “Your friends have made it abundantly clear that I am not welcome.”

“I know their first impressions were just wonderful,” Janus said with a sigh, “But you cannot write them off so quickly, they will warm up to you in time, trust me, I know from experience.”

“What do you mean?” Roman asked, tilting his head a little, Janus smiled, pulling his knees up to mimic Roman.

“I don’t think we know each other well enough for the full tragic backstory,” Janus said with a small smile, “But, they are as close as siblings, Lo and Vi, and they brought me into this group later after certain events.”

Roman nodded, looking back out towards the sunset, “Alright, I’ll trust what you say, and for the record, thank you for sticking to your word and bringing me along, even if your friends are a little prickly.”

“You’re welcome,” Janus said, nudging Roman’s arm to regain his attention before passing him the bag, “I got you some new clothes at the market - assuming you don’t want to remain in your gala attire?”

Roman laughed, “That is a kind gesture.”

“The reward we got for your assassination more than covered it,” Janus huffed, “So you basically payed for yourself.”

“Thank you,” Roman said, and Janus was started to realise how earnest his tone was.

“What… for?” Janus asked, frowning.

“I just- you’ve freed me, and - whilst Im sure you’ve had it worse - my life was hardly enjoyable back there, and you got me out, protected me, bought me clothes?” Roman said, trying to subtly wipe away a tear Janus was sure he wasn’t supposed to notice.

“As much as Vi is mad at me for it, I’m glad I could get you out of there,” Janus said softly, placing a hand on Roman’s arm, “I don’t know you well, but… back in the castle, it was clear you were unhappy.”

“Thank you, again,” Roman said with a small smile, “And I can- once I’ve gotten my barings I can leave, if you need me to, I’m happy to go alone.”

“Absolutely not,” Janus said sternly, “I didn’t kidnap a beautiful prince just for him to run off into the wilderness.”

“You think I’m beautiful?” Roman asked, blinking those oh-so-beautiful eyes of his, Janus blushed- because oh dear he totally just said that.

“I didn’t say that.” Janus said, wonderful.

“I do believe you did,” Roman said, grinning, “awee- you’re all blushy! That’s adorable!”

“I have reconsidered, you can leave in the morning,” Janus mumbled, looking away.

Roman laughed, loud and free, “No take-backs! You’re stuck with me now, sweetheart.”

“Oh no,” Janus huffed, “not petnames-”

“What, you don’t like them, darling?” Roman said, batting his eyelashes. Janus tried to cover the half of his face not covered in scales - which just happened to be bright red for no reason whatsoever - with one hand as he shoved Roman with the other.

“Stop it!” Janus cried, “I did call you beautiful, ok? Is that what you wanted?”

“Thank you!” Roman grinned, nudging him gently, “So are you, you know.”

Janus paused for a moment, while yes, those ‘pretty’ comments back in Roman’s bedroom at the palace had flustered him, he hadn’t really thought that Roman was being genuine, he still wasn’t entirely sure now, “Really?”

“Mhm,” Roman hummed, “I’d even go as far as to say you’re the prettiest person I’ve ever met, and trust me, I’ve been presented with many suitors.”

Janus choked, “That’s unfair, you can’t say that.”

“Whyever not?” Roman asked, looking almost genuinely offended, “Who are you to stilfel my truths?”

“Previously, the only person in this group able to lie,” Janus countered, “But now you’re here, so I suppose that title is invalid now.”

“I’m not lying to you, Janus,” Roman said softly, “That would be horrible of me, to lie about something like that.”

“I never said I thought you were lying,” Janus said, frowning, how the hell was this guy so perceptive? And on top of that, how had he earned such a reputation that painted him as some arrogant idiot. Really, it made no sense.

“Maybe not,” Roman said, reaching for Janus’ hand, “But you certainly implied it.”

“I did?” Janus asked, frowning further.

“You did,” Roman nodded, “I saw it in your eyes.”

For a moment, Janus couldn’t think of anything to say in return before sighing, “Are you sure you’d rather stay out here?”

“For now, yes,” Roman nodded, seeming to accept the topic change readily, “The sea is calming.”

“Alright,” Janus said, standing up, “In that case, I’ll go back to camp and bring you back something to eat, make sure you stay here?”

“Of course!” Roman smiled, “Thank you!”

Janus smiled softly as he stood up, turning to walk away, “You’re welcome, Roman.”

He’d barely moved a few paces before Roman called out again.

“Oh, and Janus?” He said, Janus turned, raising an eyebrow, “Do make sure you come back? It would just be so sad if I had to watch such a beautiful sunset alone.”

Janus laughed softly, “In that case, I’ll make sure I hurry.”

----

Tags: @full-of-roman-angst-trash @reptilianrapscallion420 @your-local-random-dino @cutebisexualmess @glacierruler @roseianxiety (if anyone wants to be added, let me know!)

[willowaudreykeyes]

They're all cuuuuute

Deceitember 2019: Snow

Summary: Day 1, Snow. Fluff and banter

Pairing: Roceit, side Dukexiety*

CW: none. it’s just fluff

Word Count: 978

*note: it’s dukexiety. side dukexiety. my bad

=

Hey winter? Yeah. You. The season of snow and ice and cold and cold and cold? Where even layers and layers of coats and hoodies and jackets that made men and women look like oversized clothing racks did nothing to keep warm? Winter. That winter. This winter. Fuck you. Fuck you with a rusty shovel. Fuck you with the force of a thousand fucking burning suns hurtling down from the heavens. May your apples be rotten and your sins too numerous to count.

If only Damian’s complaining did anything. See, he can bitch and moan and complain all he wanted, but he’s not a fucking magician. He’s not a witch and he’s not a god. The one time, the one time snow decided to grace Satan’s asscrack known as Florida, it was when Damian was outside. In nothing but a thin cotton long-sleeve shirt and jeans. Jeans. JEANS. Cotton denim jeans.

“Fuck you winter,” Damian muttered balefully under his breath. A puff of white came from his lips when he breathed out.

He should have worn a coat.

A snowball narrowly missed his face.

“Aw shit I missed!” Lamented Roman. He immediately began trying to make another snowball.

“Roman I swear if that hits me I will banish you to sleep on the couch for the rest of the month!”

Roman pouted. Virgil, thankfully, has a heart hidden underneath all his makeup and offered Damian his jacket. It just proved that when push comes to shove, one’s boyfriend will attempt to throw a ball of snow at your shivering face while one’s best friend will still begrudgingly give you warmth and comfort even if it meant that the whole street had to see his shirt.

I’m emo but in a Gerard Way. White text on black print. “Charming shirt, Virgil,” Damian couldn’t help but remark.

“Listen. You can shut your mouth or I can have my jacket back.”

Damian rolled his eyes. Guess he’ll stay quiet.

He directed his next sentence to Roman. His boyfriend. Who was ignoring Damian in favour of trying to pummel his brother Remus with snow. “Darling, can you tell me again why we’re out here in the freezing snow instead of spending the day inside where it’s warm? It’s movie night and I’m sure your brother and his boyfriend-” Virgil flushed, “-didn’t drive all this way for… whatever this is.”

Roman tangled his and Remus’ feet together and knocked them both off balance. Remus fell face first into the snow and had his entire face covered. Roman, as the mature adult he was, hollered in victory and left his brother on the street to try and curry favour with Damian. Who was, by the way, still cold. Virgil was ridiculously tall and Damian looked like a damn hobbit next to him, but his jeans were still thin as shit and the weather was still cold as shit.

No amount of Roman’s puppy-dog eyes could convince Damian to stay outside a minute longer. “It rarely snows in Florida.” Roman sidled up on the porch where Damian was seated. Their shoulders brushed and even though Roman had been frolicking in the snow, he was warm. Unfairly warm. “Remus and I used to throw powder in our room as children and pretend that it was snow. Now that opportunity has presented itself to me, it’s like a dream come true.” Fuck Roman’s insane ability to make Damian fucking melt. Fuck it. It’s almost as bad as winter.

Sitting beside Remus, who was still lying in the middle of the street like a heathen, Virgil threw him a smirk and mouthed ‘You are so whipped.’ Bitch.

“Since a dream just landed in my lap, I decided to reach for that dream. Grab it tight. Make it come true.”

“You’re quoting the main villain from Coco.”

Roman laughed and goddammit Damian was smiling too. “Not really. Well, I kind of am, but I’m quoting you, Dee.”

Damian rolled his eyes. “Roman, please. When have I ever said anything like that?”

“When you told me to pursue that callback even if it meant missing out on Pat and Lo’s wedding.” Damian remembered. Logan wasn’t upset that Roman hadn’t been able to attend. Patton was a little bummed out, but after seeing Roman with a beaming smile on his face at landing the role, Patton just showered him with praises and congratulations and completely forgot about Roman’s absence.

Roman had good friends. Damian found himself smiling. “You’re spending too much time with me,” Damian grumbled good-naturedly and placed a gentle kiss on Roman’s cheek. Damian was the one who usually cajoled and bargained his way to movie night choice or an extra few hours in bed. “Manipulating people is a good look for you Roman. Keep doing it.” Roman’s smile widened and he pressed another kiss to Damian’s cheek.

“You’re the best.”

“I know.” Damian remained on the porch and as Roman tackled his brother and started shoveling snow down Remus’ shirt. Remus retaliated with a well-placed snowball to Roman’s face. Both brothers descended into an impromptu wrestling match, kicking snow at each other and trying to shove the other down onto the ground. Damian stayed out of it and simply enjoyed the view.

Virgil, the little shit that he was, gathered up snow in his hands. While Roman was distracted fending off Remus’ relentless assault, Virgil dumped the snow in his pants. Roman’s yelling made Dot from across the street peek her head out of the window.

“Et tu, Virgil?” Roman cried in affront, jumping around and trying to dislodge the snow from his pants. “How could you!?” Remus dunked a huge snowball onto Roman’s head, and Damian’s boyfriend was covered head to toe in white, looking like an angry little cat.

It’s still cold as shit, and Damian still hated winter.

But maybe the snow wasn’t so bad.

[naminethewriter]

A Siren In Distress

Day 5 and the last callback story! Going back to my pirates & sirens AU that I’m kinda but not really working on. I’ve written two other smaller stories for it but you don’t need to read them to understand this one. (Also I did not have the time to do real medical research so that info might be off, I apologize and ignore that please 😅)

Have fun! 🥰 @loceitweek2022

Here on Ao3

Masterpost | Loceit Week 2022 Masterpost

Summary: Janus calls Logan to the beach to help him with an unusual situation.

Logan once again returned to consciousness standing on the beach as the song ended. Janus had forcefully dragged him away from his work once again. It was annoying but he had stopped arguing with the siren since finding any kind of compromise had remained fruitless.

 “Snap out of it, Logan! And come over here!” he heard Janus call, sounding far more distressed than he’d ever been in front of the human before. He quickly scanned the water, looking for the hint of gold from the siren’s scales but instead found not one but two human figures on the shore.

He’d known that sirens could take on human form if they so desired, but he’d never seen it for himself. Shifting made them weak and way more vulnerable. Some rumors even claimed that they would die if they stayed human for too long. Logan didn’t know if that was true, he’d only attempted to ask Janus about this topic once, but he’d been immediately shut down. It seemed to be a more than sensitive topic.

 So to see him standing on the beach, glaring at him (and that was undeniably Janus, his eyes still seemed to gleam golden) while fully naked was quite the shock.

 The figure lying next to him was also human in appearance but clothed. Logan couldn’t see his face from where he stood, his head turned away. His brown hair was dripping wet and plastered against his skin. The white shirt he wore was pretty much see-through at this point, his black pants clung to his legs and the boots seemed heavy.

 Logan wasn’t sure what to make of the situation.

 “Do I have to force you over, human!?” Janus growled, his eyes now glowing in a way Logan was familiar with. They were glowing with magic that was just waiting to be released.

 Logan didn’t fear Janus, nor his magic, but he still instinctively started making his way over to the water, his body still remembering times when he was frightened by such threats.

 The closer he got the more details he could make out. The man’s chest was barely moving, his arms had bruises and once he could see the face, he spotted a cut on his cheek. As he knelt at the man’s side and began searching for a pulse on his neck, Logan shot a quick look towards Janus.

 What he saw was an expression of panic. How unusual.

 The wounds were probably not his work then.

 “Tell me what happened,” Logan demanded as he fell into an almost forgotten routine of checking for head wounds and other injuries that could be life threatening.

 “Pirates attacked his ship; he was shot at I think and fell overboard. I got him out of there and brought him here,” Janus explained, the worry now overwriting his animosity towards Logan.

 “How long did ago was the attack?”

 “I don’t know how you humans keep time! I only barely understand your weird month/year thing!”

 “Fine, the sky then! Where was the sun? Was it daytime yet?”

 “It was cloudy, but probably around its highest point?” Janus started sounding distressed, so Logan stopped questioning him further. It was good enough to get an estimate. It was evening, the sun would set within two hours, so it must’ve been several hours since the attack.

 “Has he been awake since?”

 “I’m not sure, I was kinda concentrating on not letting him drown???” He paused, thinking. “I think I heard him muttering a few times but I don’t know if he was truly awake.”

 “Alright. I’ll try to wake him up. But if he remains in these wet clothes for much longer, he will get hypothermia and that is hardly something I can treat properly out here.” Logan was more or less thinking out loud, moving the man in a better position on his side to make breathing for him easier since he didn’t find any open wounds. “Can you gather firewood?”

 “What?” Janus was wide eyed. In the 300 years he had lived, he had never a reason to go on land for long. He had no real idea of how humans lived outside of ships and even then his knowledge was limited.

 “Go to the tree line and find loose wood, sticks or branches, that are dry and pile them on the beach about halfway between the water and the jungle. Thankfully the tide is lowering right now.” Janus nodded and stood and that’s when Logan remembered that he had no clothes on.

 “Wait,” he called before the siren could take more than one step away and shrugged off his coat. “Wear this please.” To his surprise, Janus didn’t even argue. The siren took the jacket, put it on and even closed it. Maybe he was cold, too? Could he get cold? Maybe his magic kept him warm? Logan would need to ask him questions about this form later.

 A groan pulled him out of his revelry. The man was moving or trying to at least. He was rather weak and the bruises Logan could see through the wet cloth of his shirt must hurt a lot. The eyes started fluttering, then closed again before the coughing set in and the man threw up next to him. Logan moved quickly to assist him.

 “Please be careful not to move too much,” he advised after the heaving stopped. “I can try and help you sit up if you wish but we need to go slow.”

 “W-where...?” The man tried to speak but his voice was raw and unstable.

 “I know you have questions but please let me examine you first. Your condition is questionable and I do not know how long you will be able to stay awake.”

 “Oka-“ He started coughing again. Logan carefully helped him spit out another mouthful of salt water.

 “Here.” He pulled his waterskin from his belt and unscrewed it. “You need to drink something. It should help.” Slowly he helped the man sit up a bit, leaning his full weight against Logan and carefully guided the water into his mouth. Not a lot but enough that it would help him ease up for a moment. Afterwards, Logan helped him lie back down, sitting up seemed to not be helpful.

 He let the man rest for a few moments when he heard footsteps approach. He looked over his shoulder to see Janus approach, behind him a pile of wood, not as big as Logan would’ve liked but it would be enough for now. He nodded towards the siren before turning back towards the man.

 “My… acquaintance will help you undress while I start a fire. You need to warm up.” He got an understanding groan in response. He helped the man to lie back down on his back and took off his own boots to use as a pillow. Not the most comfortable solution but his head should be elevated a bit. He turned to Janus who stopped next to them, silent, just watching the scene.

 “Get him out of those clothes, boots too. I’ll take care of the fire.” Janus nodded and Logan let him take his place as he moved over to the pile of wood. It took him a bit of rearranging but he managed to make it into a working fire pit. Thankfully, along with his waterskin, Logan always carried a flint stone with him so the fire started to burn soon. He moved back over to the other two.

 Janus had managed to peel off the shirt and one of the boots off the man by the time Logan rejoined them. In that time the man had also started to shiver.

 “I will help with the rest, then we will need to carry him to the fire.” Janus nodded in agreement and soon the man was nude. He seemed to out of it to care. Logan then instructed Janus as they carefully moved his body up the beach and a healthy distance away from the fire so that he could warm up without the risk of catching fire himself.

 “Alright, for now he is stable,” Logan told Janus when they were done. The man had passed out again. “In order for him to warm up properly, I will need to get some things from my camp. While I do that, you lie next to him. Skin to skin contact will speed up the heating process as long as you are warm yourself. Are you warm, Janus?”

 “I can be if I want to,” Janus smirked, apparently having gained back his confidence now that the man he’d worried over was in stable condition.

 “I presume that involves magic?” He didn’t get a direct answer but Janus’ eyes flashed with that power again which was answer enough. Logan nodded. “Very well. Take off the coat, lie next to him and drape it over the two of you. I will hurry.”

 Janus did as he was told and Logan quickly set up the man’s clothes up to dry before he left for his camp. What a weird day in his already unusual circumstances. He didn’t even know the man’s name or what Janus’ connection with him was. But he must be special if he can cause the siren to act like that.

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 Approximately an hour later, Logan found himself sitting with Janus next to the fire. He had gotten both the siren and the human a set of his clothes that fit neither of them well but would keep them warm for now. The man, Roman was his name Logan learned, had woken up by the time he got back, warmed up enough that Logan didn’t worry about his survival. Roman had managed to drink more and eat some of the food Logan had brought before falling asleep again, too tired to ask the questions that were surely on his mind. Which suited Logan just fine since he had his own questions to ask Janus.

 “Please explain.”

 “Why do I need to. I saw him drown, I rescued him, I brought him here, end of story.”

 “Do not lie to me, Janus. You wouldn’t normally rescue a human, you told me yourself that you love to watch them drown.”

 “I do not owe you an explanation for what I do.”

 “In this case you do. I have projects to do here, Janus, time sensitive projects. I’ve not only lost time this evening but as long as he stays here I will continue to do so. And he is no condition to leave.” Janus grit his teeth, glaring into the flames. Logan was about to insist again when the siren spoke up.

 “I found his ship a few months ago. It wasn’t anything unusual, I watched it for a while, trying to find a good target to lure into the water when I saw him. He piqued my interest, so I waited until nightfall. He was on watch and I called out to him. It was so easy to charm him and I got him down into a lifeboat without even using magic before I noticed the similarities.” Janus gave Logan a pointed look he didn’t understand.

 “Similarities to what?” Janus rolled his eyes.

 “Not what, Logan. Who.” For the first time, Logan truly looked at Roman’s features. Before he’d been a patient so his focus had been on the injuries but even in the orange light of the setting sun and the flames dancing across his skin it was easy to see his resemblance to Remus. Logan thought back for a moment to the last time he spoke to the pirate captain.

 “He mentioned a brother.”

 “Indeed. When I remarked as much to Roman, he got very excited. Apparently he hasn’t heard from his brother in some time. He got so eager; it was cute. So I decided to indulge him. We talked until somebody noticed his absence and called for him. I escaped before I was spotted by anyone else.”

 “But you went back, I presume.”

 “Yes. Foolishly, I did. More than once. I haven’t talked to many humans for a long time, most I kill the first time we meet. But he was fascinating and I found myself enjoying his company. So when the attack happened and he fell…” Janus trailed off but Logan could guess what he was hinting at.

 “I did not expect to see the day you care for someone other than yourself.”

 “Shut up!” Janus hissed. “I do not care, I simply… didn’t want him to die yet.”

 “Of course.” Logan decided it was time to drop the subject. It was getting late and he needed to create a shelter for Roman since there was no way to transport him to his camp. They had struggled to carry him from the shoreline to the fire already. He stood.

 "I will make preparations for the night. What about you?" Janus still looked at him with a bit of anger but didn’t comment on it further. Instead he motioned to the ocean.

 “I need to go back. I will return in the morning.” He glanced to Roman one last time before taking off the clothes Logan had given him and returning to the water. Logan watched him and sighed once he vanished beneath the waves. How troublesome.

[ace-in-a-shopping-cart]

Sanders Sides Masterpost

Requests are: Closed.

One shots:

Virgil’s Bad Dream | Audiobook

Virgil has a bad dream and Logan awkwardly comforts him. Platonic Analogical.

Movie Night | Audiobook

Written for a challenge. Virgil and Remus share movie nights Pre-AA. Platonic or Romantic Dukexiety.

Cerberus  | Audiobook | The Giant Black Dog | Audiobook |

Virgil’s life takes a change for the better when he quite literally bumps into a tired single dad named Logan. Eventual romantic Analogical.

Remus vs Bath | Audiobook

A crack fic. Remus likes to transform into a dog. Remus does not like taking a bath. Platonic Creativitwins.

Help with Homework | Audiobook

A self-indulgent fluff fest where Logan helps someone with homework and gives cuddles. Platonic or Romantic Logan x reader

Cuddles  | Audiobook

Janus is cold and Roman is a space heater. Platonic or Romantic Roceit.

Trust Issues  | Audiobook

Virgil and Logan are internet friends. Can they be something more? Romantic Analogical.

The Contest  | Audiobook

Virgil and Logan are not affectionate around the others, preferring to keep their affection behind closed door. When the others decide to have a contest about them, Virgil thinks it’s harmless fun. That opinion changes when Logan has a panic attack. Romantic Analogical.

Braces  | Audiobook

Remus needs to get braces and Virgil is there to make it more fun. Platonic Dukexiety.

Asexual  | Audiobook

Virgil believes he is broken. Logan is determined to prove him wrong, even if he has to cross the country to do it.  Romantic Analogical.

The Prince and the Frog  | Audiobook

A little one shot based on the original story of the Princess and the Frog. Romantic Royality.

The Second-Hand Bookstore  | Audiobook

Logan runs a bookstore in a small town that has a secret. Virgil is a nomadic vampire. Romantic Analogical.

High School Rejects  | Audiobook

Analogical high school AU. Logan is mute but though he's not able to speak he's very intelligent, Virgil is the emo "freak" of the school, both are outcast and always getting bullied, but they have each other's back and are best friends, but they just might be more. Romantic Analogical.

Love Is In The Little Things  | Audiobook

Logan is exhausted when he comes home from work, luckily his husband knows just what to do to help him relax. Domestic fluff written to cheer me up. Maybe it'll do the same for you? Gratuitous cuteness. Romantic Analogical.

Eyeshadow  | Audiobook

Logan’s reaction to Virgil’s new eyeshadow. After the end card, Virgil sinks down to his room, where his boyfriend is waiting to curl up and watch a movie. However, it seems Virgil has something on his mind first. Romantic Analogical.

Snuggles  | Audiobook

Logan goes to see his husband in the hospital and Virgil breaks some rules. Romantic Analogical.

Comfort and Cuddles | Audiobook

A self-indulgent fic where the perspective character gets cuddles and some help with self care from Virgil. Platonic or Romantic Virgil x reader.

Loving Logan | (This one has the audiobook first and then the fic)

Virgil thinks back to a simpler time and vows to be strong in the future. Warning: Major Character Death. Romantic Analogical.

Dance with Me Under the Stars | Audiobook

Virgil and Logan are in the same debate class. When the semester ends and they keep running into each other on campus, they strike up an uneasy friendship. Virgil catches feelings and must then figure out how to deal with his hopeless pining. Romantic Analogical.

The Evening Emerald

A Cinderella story with a twist. Virgil dreams of escaping from his abusive household. When he overhears his step-family discussing plans to assassinate Prince Logan on one of the three nights there is a ball being held for Prince Patton and Prince Remus' engagement to each other. While Virgil is trying to find a way to warn any member of the royal family of the assassination plans, he keeps getting pulled into conversation (and dancing, and chess, and-) with a stranger in a dark green mask. He starts dreaming of a life with this man. Romantic Analogical.

Coffee Flavored Kisses | Audiobook

Logan deviates from his routine and, after falling asleep at a coffee shop, meets someone who would change his life. Romantic Analogical.

Song Fics:

Control  | Audiobook

A song fic done with Control by Halsey. Remus centric.

Heard You Crying  | Audiobook

Logan hears his adopted son Virgil crying and goes to check on him. Platonic/ Familial Analogical. Song fic based off Heard You Crying by Michael Schulte.

Just Give Me A Reason  | Audiobook

Virgil has a misunderstanding and lack of communication. Romantic Analogical songfic based off Just Give Me A Reason by P!nk.

Sad Song  | Audiobook

Remus has feeling about his brother. Based off Sad Song by We the Kings.  Platonic Creativitwins.

What Did You Do with My Old Heart?  | Audiobook

Patton is hurting and Thomas needs to help him. Combination of Things We Used to Share by Thomas Sanders and Hello My Old Heart by The Oh Hello’s. Platonic All.

Bubble Boy  | Audiobook

Virgil gets bullied and Logan helps him out. TW: blood, mention of broken bones, bullying. Analogical can be read as platonic or romantic. Boy in the Bubble by Alec Benjamin.

Constants  | Audiobook

Virgil feels shunned by the other sides, always on the outside. But when something happens and Patton shows up in his home, he wonders if that was always one way. Based on the song Constants by Spectral Heart. Platonic All.

Clarity  | Audiobook

When they find out Logan and Remus, their hatred drives a fearful Logan to flee his home with his partner. But while on the run he realizes that wherever Remus is is home for him. Song fic based on Clarity by Zedd. Romantic Lomus.

Hold On  | Audiobook

Virgil and Logan were happy. At least, Logan thought so. When Virgil has a panic attack and goes outside their routine, Logan begins to worry. He only starts blaming himself when they get into an accident while he's driving, Virgil going into a coma. Can Virgil hold on long enough for Logan to apologize? (This makes it sound angstier than it is but I swear there's a happy ending.) Song fic based on Hold On by Chord Overstrand. Romantic Analogical.

Falling Like the Stars  | Audiobook

All Logan wants to do is come home and nap with his husband. Luckily, he gets to do just that. Song fic of Falling Like the Stars by James Arthur. Romantic Analogical.

Blood in the Water  | Audiobook

Virgil is an undercover cop. Janus is a crime boss. Based on Blood//Water by grandson. Platonic All.

Toxic Thoughts  | Audiobook | Part 2  | Audiobook | Part 3 | Audiobook

Logan has ADHD. And sometimes, that's okay. But others, it's the most frustrating thing on earth. He struggles through life with his adoptive father at his side, helping where he can. Vent fic. Based on Toxic Thoughts by Faith Marie. Familial/Parental Analogical.

It’s Alright  | Audiobook

Remus can't seem to do anything right and it hurts. His brother comforts him and tells him life will get better. Song fic based on It's Alright by Mother Mother. Platonic Creativitwins.

Waving Through a Window  | Audiobook

A character study of pre-AA Virgil disguised as a songfic of Waving Through a Window from Dear Evan Hansen. Platonic All.

Hoodie  | Audiobook

Virgil and Logan were happy in college but they broke up and grew older. When Virgil travels to a new town for work, he meets a memory of his past that sends his brain into turmoil. Based on the song Hoodie by Hey Violet. Past romantic analogical and ambiguous ending.

Another Deep Breath | Audiobook

Virgil still misses and loves Logan, he's still hurt about the way they broke up, but he's content to simply be in his life. Even if it is just as a friend of a friend that he barely ever spoke to again. Even if that meant having his lungs slowly fill with flowers as he grew closer and closer to death. Hanahaki disease, past Analogical, Lomus/Intrulogical, major character death.

Waiting for Superman | Audiobook

Virgil is waiting for her superman. She goes about her day with her two cats Stranger and Angel. Having no idea when they'll arrive or even if they would, her attention keeps wandering. (Fem!Virgil, Enby!Logan) Romantic Analogical.

Slow Dancing in the Snow | Audiobook

Newly-weds Virgil and Logan Kelsey spend a peaceful evening together as they go grocery shopping, slow dance in their driveway, and make dinner together. Romantic Analogical.

Soulmate AUs:

Soulmates  | Audiobook

Every morning lead to Virgil being scared. Scared that Logan was going to walk out that door and never return, scared that the same thing Logan said every morning was going to be the last thing he ever heard him say. One day, it almost came to be. Analogical soulmate AU. The last words your soulmate says to you are written on your arm in their handwriting. Romantic Analogical

Mystery of the Music | Audiobook

Logan's soulmate has the odd tendency to repeat a song or parts of a song for hours on end, getting it stuck in Logan's head. When he finally meets him, however, it all makes perfect sense. Soulmate AU where you can hear the music your soulmate hears. Romantic Analogical.

I Can Hear Your Voice | Audiobook

Virgil had never met Logan, but loved him with all his heart. Logan had always been there for him, always been with him. The first time he was aware of him was in kindergarten. That was when the teachers told him of soulmates. He was told that the soulmate was just a few words away, they could hear everything you said. That was when he and Logan had been first introduced. Romantic Analogical soulmate AU where you can hear your soulmate’s voice no matter the distance. Gender-fluid! Virgil.

Paper Stars  | Audiobook

Logan had always thought it was a legend, a myth, a bedtime story. But the thought of soulmates stayed with him. What happens when he comes face to face with his soulmate? Romantic Analogical.

Soulmate September

Birthday Fics:

Roman’s Birthday: A Tale of Self Discovery  | Audiobook  | Soul of the Kingdom  | Audiobook

Roman goes on a quest to defeat a dragon. It does not go as planned. Platonic or Romantic Roceit.

The Scholar and the Swashbuckler  | Audiobook

Romantic Lomus fluff for Remus’ birthday.

Birthday Cake | Audiobook

Virgil tries to make something special for Logan’s birthday but it seems fate has other ideas. Romantic/married Analogical

Late Night Confessions | Audiobook

U.S. Marshal Virgil is tasked with protecting scientist/witness Logan. What happens when Virgil develops feelings for his charge? Romantic Analogical.

Requests:

Different Can Be Beautiful  | Audiobook

My first request!! Remus is neurodiverent and struggles with it. Platonic All.

Missing You  | Audiobook

Kissing so desperately their whole body wraps around the other with Romantic Moceit.

Unicorn Snuggles  | Audiobook

Top of head kisses with Romantic Analogical.

Virgil to the Rescue  | Audiobook

“We’ve been friends since the first grade. I’ve seen you throw up a billion times, how’s this any different?” Platonic Dukexiety.

How Did You Talk Me Into This?  | Audiobook

Remus is dragged to an astrological convention, only for Virgil to flirt with the guest speaker.  Romantic Analogical.

Two Sugars  | Audiobook

Virgil is a bored barista. Life gets a bit more interesting when a new regular shows up. Romantic Sleepxiety coffee shop AU.

In the Neighborhood.  | Audiobook

Virgil surprises his boyfriend, who later returns the favor. Romantic Analogical with Dancer! Virgil.

What is Love?  | Audiobook

It was no secret that Roman was infatuated with Virgil. However, when he was asked what he liked about him, he couldn't come up with a single thing. Virgil turned him down when he asked him out, so Roman took some  time to figure himself out. In doing so, he met someone who showed him what love truly is. Unrequited love prompt. One sided Prinxiety. Romantic Analogical. Romantic Royality.

“I’m sorry if this sounds weird.”  | Audiobook

Patton has trouble sleeping so Virgil comes over to help. Platonic Moxiety.

“I’m sorry, could you repeat that?”  | Audiobook

Patton was invited to see what Roman was working on. He also wanted to ask him something. QPR Royality.

Crying on the Kitchen Floor  | Audiobook

“You found me crying on the kitchen floor in the middle of the night surrounded by a shattered jelly jar.” A very domestic Romantic Analogical fic.

Divided Attention | Audiobook

Logan does not have the energy to study but needs to get his homework done. Frustration ensues. (Kind of a vent fic as I've had trouble focusing lately)

Rust and Bones | Audiobook

Logan is a Cinderella type character, step-child turned servant. Virgil is the family android that isn’t treated well by the main family. He’s constantly being broken or taken to a shop for upgrades. Logan was unprepared for the shop to reset Virgil’s memories the first time. Logan lost the love of his life and grieved over him as a stranger wearing his face went about in his place and everyone else acted as if nothing had changed. Can Logan find a way to stop Virgil’s memories being erased? Can he somehow get the android to love him again? Or will the family continuously get in their way?

Bad Things Happen Bingo:  Card 1 |

Series:

Anxiety’s Book (Platonic All with implied post story Romantic Analogical):

Virgil finds a memory of Thomas’ that has a hundred different ways of relieving anxiety. Virgil decides to try all of them, with varying levels of success.

The Switch

When season 1 Anxiety and season 2 Virgil swap places, they are both panicked. Virgil must learn to survive in the worst period of his life while Anxiety gets to find out what his future entails.

Set in the same timeline as Anxiety's Book but it's not necessary to read that first. Romantic analogical.

Legends of Lgona

Jewel of the Sea:

An Analogical Little Mermaid Au. Virgil is a mermaid, desperate to survive. When he winds up with legs and bumps into Logan in the woods, Logan takes him in. He promises to help him with his 'amnesia'. During the course of the story, they fall in love and realize that sometimes one might not need to know everything about someone’s past to love them for who they are.

Love On Open Waters

(Summary in masterpost) Romantic Intruality/ Dukeality with side established Analogical.

[iceshard1011]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Sanders Sides (Web Series) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Deceit | Janus Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Deceit | Janus Sanders Characters: Deceit | Janus Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders Additional Tags: pre janus' photoshoot, he had no right looking that gorgeous okay, yeah literally got inspired by the fact that janus and roman wore the same lipstick, could be romantic or platonic, Insecurity, Self Confidence Issues, Deceit | Janus Sanders Angst, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders is a Sweetheart, who is only mentioned once, Making Up, (kind of), Hopeful Ending, Guilt, Makeover, In which i call myself a multishipper and then continuously go nuts over roceit, Ro goes from confused himbo to romance expert way too fast, and that's bias for you, Listen just because janus is self preservation doesn't mean he's got good self esteem, Janus ‘self care’ sanders: what is makeup, Fluff and Angst, Pre-Relationship Summary:

Janus needs to get ready for his turn for that stupid photoshoot idea Thomas offered him. He’s not exactly looking for help, but he gets it anyway.

And… maybe something more.

2k word fic under the cut :)

The mindscape hadn’t seen much of it’s self-proclaimed prince lately. It was painfully noticeable, given the halls weren’t being deafened by singing, and no one was as challengeable or as willing to bicker as much anymore. Patton’s smile was just this side of strained at breakfast. Logan would look up, eyes sparkling and eyebrow half-raised, the beginnings of something on his tongue before he would remember there was no one to say it to. Virgil kept sneaking sideways glances towards the staircase, as if no one could see him.

Not that Janus was bothered, of course. He had always preferred peace and quiet over chaos. He had just… become slightly acclimated to it during his years with Remus.

Except… it did make things exceptionally difficult when Janus needed something.

Even more so when he didn’t know exactly what it was he wanted.

Janus tried not to curl his lip too much as he stared at his reflection. Stupid sides and stupid Thomas and his followers and his own stupid thoughts. This looked wrong and felt wrong and Janus was a few seconds away from burning this damn —

An opening door. It creaked slightly, not enough that it was Virgil’s, but certainly not Logan’s. It was opened hesitantly, not something that Patton would have much reason for. Perfect.

Janus stuck to the shadows as he slunk down the hallway. It was unnecessary, as had been prefaced many times by the others — even Virgil had caught him at one point, in the middle of slithering silently into the kitchen for something to drink.

“You don’t have to do that,” Virgil had said. “You’re allowed to get something to eat.” (Janus had not pointed out that his throat had been parched and itching for water from a dying scream after flashing images had raped his sleeping mind.) “Plus, you look ridiculous skulking behind furniture like that, anyway.��� Janus had flicked his tongue at him and left to get his water.

Roman hesitated at the top of the stairs before slowly making his way down. Janus didn’t know what he was looking for, but it didn’t seem to deter him. Once he was out of sight, Janus shot into his room, the door still creaking open.

What did he need? What was he going to need to put on? What were the requirements of this stupid activity?

He didn’t even know what he wanted. What would help? What would cover up enough that he fit the unspoken, stupid critera for these damn photos? What did foundation do? Would it dry his skin out? He was not in the mood to deal with brittle scales.

Lipstick. Roman had used lipstick in his photoshoot.

Janus shot forward and grabbed the first one of the display rack.

“Stealing now, are you?”

Janus whirled around, thankfully crushing the rather embarrassing squeak before it could escape.

“Oh,  absolutely,”  he purred, but the not-lie was immediately evident the moment Roman’s angry eyes trailed down to the lipstick clenched in his fist.

“You sly little —” The prince marched forward, face twisted dangerously, and despite himself, Janus found himself stepping backwards.

Roman wasn’t violent. He was brash, and impulsive, and when he pulled his sword on whatever startled him, but he had never, not once, used physical aggression to prove a point.

Janus found it hard to believe he would start now, but… Roman had never been driven to such a point before now.

And Janus was the reason.

It was when he had stalked close enough that their height differences were clear enough that under normal circumstances, Janus would be rather annoyed (now, however, he was only focusing on keeping his breath calm and his gaze level), that Roman seemed to notice the way Janus was dressed.

“What are you wearing?” he uttered, suddenly sounding far more confused than mad.

“Something that was certainly all my idea,” Janus hissed, waiting for the disbelieving eyebrow raise, for the look that said You? Really? Waiting, as tense as he had ever been, for more laughing.

Roman did nothing except manage to look even more lost. “Oh.”

Janus wasn’t sure if he felt irritated or guilty at the prince’s crestfallen look.

Irritated, apparently, as his thoughts began to hiss.

Oh, terribly sorry that I’ve been accepted like the rest of you. My apologies that I aim to help Thomas just like everyone else in this damn place. I am  so sorry  that for whatever godforsaken reason they asked me to put on these ridiculous —

“Well, hurry up and finish the look,” Roman said, as if resigning himself to a fate that no one asked him to.

Janus blinked at him.

Roman summoned a hand-held mirror and held it out towards him.

Janus didn’t quite say ‘what the hell’ — but it was close.

Roman seemed smart enough to read the baffled look on his face. “You can apply it here so I can be assured you will hand it back when you are done. I can’t trust someone like you to return it otherwise.”

“I’m sure you can replace a single stick,” Janus said, just slightly scathingly.

Roman didn’t seem discouraged. He expectantly held the mirror out further.

Janus’ stomach was writhing uncomfortably. He kept his face carefully blank, loath to betray how distasteful he found this, and glared at the mirror. He ignored the bemused look Roman gave him when he struggled with uncapping the lid, and fought against the slight tremors in his hand.

He didn’t get very far before Roman, looking absolutely scandalized, reared back like a startled horse. Janus paused when his mirror was yanked away and glared up at the prince.

“I would appreciate a limited amount of interruptions,” he began but Roman had already dumped the mirror and darted forward to snatch the lipstick from his hand. “Hey!”

“Why did you try applying it like that?” he cried. Janus shuffled, bewildered.

“I know exactly what you’re —”

“No, no,” Roman interrupted, waving his hands. “No. Stop. Come here.”

Janus bared his teeth. “Why?”

“You look like you’ve never applied makeup a day in your life,” Roman said, and suddenly Janus didn’t have any quips to reply with. Roman squinted. “You’ve never used makeup?”

“Because I have always had a reason to,” Janus snapped. Roman raised his hands, which surprised him.

“Right.” The prince beckoned again, but Janus remained rooted. What on earth was the moron trying to achieve?

Roman seemed to pick up on his hesitance, and leaned forward, quietly scrutinizing. Janus bit back on a snarl.

“When’s the shoot?” Roman asked.

“What?” Janus said, slightly more harsh than he intended.

“The photoshoot,” Roman clarified.

“Whenever I want,” Janus snapped.

Roman, rather than retorting, or recoiling, lit up. “Perfect!”

Janus slunk backwards. “What are you playing at, White Knight?”

A flash of confusion danced in Roman’s eyes for a split second before he lost himself in his excitement once more.

“Your makeup, Phantom of the Opera!” he shrilled, bouncing over to his vanity and pulling out the chair. “I’ll do it for the photoshoot! Come, sit, sit!” Janus narrowed his eyes. He didn’t move. Roman faltered. “Or… or not. I don’t —”

“Why?” Janus interjected.

“You can’t get dressed up without a little makeup,” Roman said with a smile.

“The others did,” Janus pointed out, but Roman waved him off.

“It’s imperative to feel good when you should be looking good!” He began to dig around in his draws, pulling out a variety of brushes and different coloured palettes. Janus didn’t know what any of them were for.

“What are you implying?” he asked slowly.

Roman paused long enough to level him with a skeptical look. “You, who came in here for makeup and got caught red handed… are trying to ask what I am getting at?”

Janus glared at him.

Roman gestured to the chair once more. “Sit.”

Sulking, Janus sat.

Roman studied him carefully for a moment before beginning to sort through his ridiculously large assortments of strange… makeup… things.

The prince started slowly, using an odd, coloured sponge, but Janus still flinched when the first cold sensation started to plaster his face.

Roman pulled back as well. “Sorry. Here, this is primer. It’s kind of like moisturiser.”

Janus’s tongue flicked in and out for a moment in consideration. Coming to a decision, he forced himself to sit still and allow Roman to start again. He must have realised Janus was still not entirely comfortable with this setting, so he began to offer what each tool was and what it did as he applied it to Janus’ face.

Primer, foundation, ‘concealer,’ whatever the hell  that was…

It was quiet for a few minutes while Janus let Roman work before he finally had to speak.

“You’re… not doing my other side.”

Roman didn’t pause, moving to pick a different brush and palette. “Your scales?” he asked, focusing on where he was working. Janus found the lack of eye contact oddly comforting.

“Why aren’t you covering them up?” Janus asked.

Roman did halt, then, and lowered the brush. He frowned slightly. “Why would I want to?”

The earnest in his voice made Janus falter. The prince’s genuine confusion made his chest feel impossibly wide and too warm. Roman had already resumed his work, completely clueless to what he’d done.

You fucking himbo, Janus thought.

“Close your eyes for me,” Roman instructed. Janus frowned at him. Roman didn’t seem to understand that kind of action required an amount of trust that Janus certainly did not have for him yet. He elaborated with a beseeching, “Please?”

Janus’ eyes closed.

He could tell Roman was pleased when he got back to work. “Keep your eyes relaxed, but don’t open them, unless you want a bunch of brush bristles where they should not be.”

“Pleasant,” Janus remarked.

“Very,” Roman agreed sagely. Janus bit down the smirk.

It was quiet again, apart from Roman beginning to hum the beginnings of a song. Janus didn’t recognise it, and he wasn’t even sure Roman knew he was doing it. But it wasn’t unpleasant, so Janus let it be. The lack of silence was comforting against any awkwardness that could have remained.

Eyeshadow, eyeliner, mascara.

Eventually, Roman leaned back, and beamed. “There.” He held up another — how many did he have? — handheld mirror. “Look!”

Janus looked.

Roman’s smile softened as he glanced between Janus’ face and his reflection. “You like it.” It wasn’t a question.

“How do you know?” Janus asked.

“I didn’t push any blush on your cheeks.”

Janus didn’t point out that Roman had moved his hand to Janus’ knee and it was burning through the skirt, but sure. Janus could agree that he didn’t  hate  the look Roman had given him.

Roman’s eyes scanned over Janus’ face once more, and this time Janus matched his gaze unwaveringly. A smile twitched at Roman’s lips, and the prince jumped.

“Oh! Almost forgot the whole reason this happened!” He twisted around and turned back, jabbing the lipstick at Janus’ face. It was jolting, and Janus jerked backwards against his own will. “Sorry, sorry.” Roman held a hand. “Come here, come back. I’ll be gentle, promise.”

Janus remained still as Roman lined his lips with the paint. The fingers pressed to the edge of his jawline rendered him rather useless against his instincts, anyway.

Roman’s eyebrows twitched downward for a second. He must have made a mistake, because he moved to carefully swipe a finger at the edge of Janus’ lips.

Goddamn it, this was such a mistake.

Janus swallowed.

Finally, after way too long how slow do you apply lipstick, Roman pulled back, seeming satisfied.

“Now you're ready for a photoshoot,” he decided.

Janus glanced back to his reflection. He still had some of his own details to add, but… yes. Janus could almost agree.

Roman went back to sorting through his various makeup supplies. Janus felt a little transfixed with the deft movements of the prince, how certain he moved, how he knew where everything needed to be. A confidence Janus had failed to see in… a very, very long time.

A sharp laugh, vicious and hurtful, the lie doing nothing to soften the blow —

Janus stood abruptly, the chair wobbling against the carpet. Roman glanced up. He seemed to remember where they had been before Janus’ makeover, and for a moment his eyes darkened. Janus braced himself for another argument.

Then Roman’s shoulders relaxed and he tilted his head. “Have fun,” he said. Then, after a moment, added, “You’ll kill it.”

Janus halted at the doorway before he could flee, taken off guard. He glanced down at the prince, who gifted him a small smile.

Janus didn’t smile back. He turned to study the doorway framework. “It would certainly be rather… dismal if you came down for dinner at some point tonight. Presumably, at the same time as everyone else.”

Roman raised an eyebrow, amused. “Oh, truly?” he said. His voice was warm.

Janus sighed theatrically. “Oh, I don’t know. I couldn't argue if you were to try to prove me wrong.”

Roman tossed his head. “Watch it, Noodles. You don’t want to defy a knight.”

“Perhaps not,” Janus mused, regarding a chip in the doorway’s wood. “But a hero never backs down from a challenge.”

He didn’t wait to see Roman’s expression. He wisped away down the hallway without looking back, without seeing what he could have just done.

Like a coward.

He may have just made things worse. He could have reversed everything that odd makeup session had built. He was well aware of the fact that if that was the case he should have kept his mouth shut.

But oddly, Roman’s silence hadn’t seemed heavy. He hadn’t tensed. He hadn’t shouted, or scowled, or slammed the door in Janus’ face.

Granted, Janus hadn’t given him a chance to, but…

As he slid into his room and quietly closed the door behind him, he didn’t feel horrible. And maybe that wasn’t a bad thing.

Now. He set his gaze on his closet, still open and waiting. Where was his hat?

[treenissanderssidesstuff]

The Gold of Your Heart

by @sher-soc-the-famder

(blog for the fic is @thegoldofyourheart)

a03 link

Canon compliant pre-Janus name reveal, romantic roceit

Roman finds a stray snake sleeping in the lightside's common area and decides to take the stray 'figment' back to the imagination where it belongs. However, he gets slightly attached. He's not the only one however....

If you know me, you knew this one was coming up eventually. This is like the roceit fic. This is the full enemies to friends to lovers spectrum and it's an amazing read, I totally suggest it even if you're not into the ship for the sheer adventure it takes you on. At over 200k words, it'll take some time to get through, but again, worth it.

[anxious-logic]

Short Series

Beyond Dreams (AO3):

A Love Beyond, Undefined Roceit, T. 384 words. Hurt/little comfort. (Also part of the Soulmate September series.) AO3

Lovely Dreams, Romantic Roceit, G. 659 words. Hurt/Comfort. AO3

A Galaxy in Progress (AO3):

The Stars Align, pre-romantic Logince, G. 737 words. College meet-cute. (Also part of the Soulmate September series.)  AO3

Protostar, pre-romantic Logince, T. 670 words. Angsty-ish hurt/comfort (I guess). AO3

Wounded (AO3):

Crying All Alone, Patton/someone, M. 440 words. Hurt/no comfort. (Also part of the Soulmate September series.) AO3

Healing Together, romantic Royality, M. 2,218 words. Heavy angst, some hurt/comfort. (Also part of the New Year, Old Tropes series.) AO3

Crown Prince Remus (AO3):

Royally Difficult Problems..., platonic Dukeceit, T. 1,380 words. Royal fake dating. (Also part of the New Year, Old Tropes series.) AO3

Why Didn't You Tell Me?, platonic Intrulogical, G. 984 words. Kid fic. (Also part of the New Year, Old Tropes series.) AO3

Meeting, pre-romantic Loceit, T. 1,154 words. Meet-cute. AO3

'Til Death Do We Meet (AO3):

Timeless Love, Romantic Analogical, M. 1,269 words. Uhh…. meet-cute, I guess? (Also part of the Soulmate September series.) AO3

Helping Hands, romantic Analogical, G. 1,108 words. Fluffy hurt/comfort. (Also part of the New Year, Old Tropes series.) AO3