#ppl that demand things of others don’t deserve good things

[shadowhoodie13]

So I legit just bought Homicipher yesterday only to find out that the creator is supposedly gonna do a final update before canceling the game bc ppl are demanding updates?

Y’all I mean this so genuinely, what made you think harassing and demanding updates from a creator a month into the game being out was a good idea? I understand wanting more content but maybe idk read/make a fanfic for it instead?? Do literally anything besides harass the poor creator wtf made you think demanding content would actually get you more content?!???!

ITS BEEN OUT FOR A SINGLE FUCKING MONTH!!! Games take even more time to make than other kinds of content bc they gotta draw write and decide how to make each idea correspond w the cipher plus the fact that coding goes into it. Y’all need to chill w the consumerism mindset when it comes to fandom, maybe create soemthing and then you’ll understand how that poor creator feels.

Everyone that decided to bother that poor person should think long and hard on their actions bc you’ve ruined it for the rest of us sane and normal ppl who don’t go bothering others for content. Think abt what goes into making a game like homicipher and reflect on what you’ve done

[pokedext]

I know everyone is giving their own theories to the more conservative younger gen z, but I think it’s a symptom of something beyond sexism. That’s too easy a solution to explain. Also too simple to blame the democrats bad tendency to drive for the middle route.

I think the efforts of undermining and cutting education by the Republican Party is in part over time paying off. An educated population does not fit their end goal for society.

It pairs well with the huge amount boomers retiring and the huge demand for jobs especially lower skill jobs. My generation is in a weird spot cause we actually largely were pushed to get a college education. Which for us has finally allowed some downward trickle. Plus the trend of inheriting money from the more well off boomers as they die. They actually put an article out in Times about this. At first I scoffed, but then had a conversation with my own father.

I kind of my entire life expected nothing given the recession really fucked up the economy for my gen x parents. I also didn’t get the good luck being the tail end of Y… But after my father’s disclosure of his current standing I realize long term it’s going to pay out really well for Gen Y. We will have the assets and education. The political environment will harm us a lot less than it will for Gen Z.

Which who if I even try to talk to them about being wary of trades seem to think they pay really well. They do for young adults. At my age I make the same amount as seniors in them, with a lot more room to grow. Also better options with my disabilities that aren’t aging well. I feel like my father being the only college educated besides my grandmother I can see side by side how this stuff pays out. My uncle’s have less and frankly can’t afford to take it easy. Yeah they have their needs met, but they’re living on the cusp of lower middle class. They have no upward growth, lot of physical health issues from their careers, and the current economy does not favor their disposition.

The college debt thing is bad, but your odds of being able to retire go way up. Especially now that there’s better routes to loan forgiveness. If Gen X and younger would just use this with grants at community college I think they could leverage better than us… However cause they’re falling into the republican spew of just skipping college they’re being groomed into the next servitude generation. Which there’s a huge shortage for ppl willing to do that, but not for long as working geographics change.

Since Gen Y isn’t largely having children that also is limiting how well rounded the generations below us are. As in ppl like myself who are educated with decent household incomes aren’t bringing up anyone, the line of our ideology ends with us.

It also really benefits Gen Y competitive wise if Gen Z and younger don’t persue college education. Which is actually amazing despite that most of us still don’t vote that way. I just wish the concern would resinate in younger ppl.

I feel really bad for all these young ppl. Hindsight is bitch, that I learned myself. I already have to redo my own college education, but I know for my body it’s not optional. I cannot much handle my hybrid white/blue collar job. Yet I’m still slotted better by generational wealth and stupid luck.

For the love of god do not think boomers in blue collar jobs thrived without other inputs. Silent generation established strong labor laws and unions that have been dismantled. Also a lot of boomers were put into college by the silent generation. My great grandfather slaved at odd end jobs to pay for my grandmother’s future. He always deserved more than he got in life, but he made sure his kids wouldn’t share his misfortune. He would never tell ppl blue collar work pays well. My other grandfather older, but also part of silent gen with gen x kids did blue collar work to pay for college for his kids too. They know that shit doesn’t end well. So they didn’t want their kids to persue it.

[personasintro]

I am sad, I am sad because it hurts me to see you having to deal with all of these impatient, ungrateful and entitled people that somehow find/take the time to complain and demand updates but cannot seem to find that time to either write you some words of encouragement or even read your replies to the mountain of other asks where you explain why it’s taking a little longer than usual or what has been going on in your personal life. I wonder if those people even have a sense of reality or understand that there is a life to live outside of these stories because they clearly cannot seem to comprehend that you not only work your ass off and barely have some time for yourself but also already dedicate so much of your time to us.

On top of your personal issues, work and physical health issues, you not only take the time to write as much as you can but also interact with us and talk to us and give us an explanation on why a story is taking longer to update. You give update us on the progress of your writing. Not because you have to but because you want to. Do people not see that?? Do people not see the small things in between that you do for us?? You could easily be a silent writer and not put in the time to have this blog and update us and interact with us. You could go completely off the grid and just update your stories on the platforms you use. But you choose not to, you choose to deal with all of this because somehow you still believe that we are worth that.

You are probably the most selfless person I have come across and I truly admire you. You’re mature and always remain calm, composed and respectful in your answers. You are honest, straightforward and say things as they should be said and stay true to yourself. And I am proud of you.

Lastly, I wanted to ask how your shoulder is doing now? Are you healing well Mimi? I also read that you’ll be going away next week, I hope you have so much fun and you get some time to relax and unwind because you deserve it more than anyone.

Take care of your lovely self and I will always be rooting for you!! 💗🌸

I said this many times before but putting MH on Wattpad was both a blessing and a curse. If someone asked me if I recommended them using Wattpad as a platform for their stories, I’d tell them to think it through. No wonder Wattpad has such an awful reputation of having kids in there. I mean, one look at my message board there and you will understand 💀

If you’re a minor = don’t engage with my stories, don’t interact with me. You will be blocked.

Thank you for this lovely post. It’s been posted a while ago, didn’t really have the time to answer all these kind of messages. Looking back, I do have a wonderful community despite some toxic ppl lurking around here. I know many of you are having my back no matter what. You guys just know & I absolutely appreciate every single one of you, and every word you write and put out to have my back. I know and I see you 💝 you’re a true gift!

Thanks for asking! My shoulder is good now! I do have a fresh scar and it’s healing slowly. Sometimes when it’s too hot it stings and the skin there is sensitive (understandably) but it’s all better now! 🩵

[deantheofficial]

I get your point and I never said he couldn’t share his concerns or anything else with us all I’m saying is Dean keeps saying he’s dropping the album for the past 6 years and morning has happened I think he doesn’t want to disappoint fans and that’s why he keeps saying he will but Dean continues to scrap the album time after time I don’t think he knows how to follow up the first album or even maybe he’s just not into this album as much as he wants to believe I want good things for Dean mentally and physically I’m not here trying to drag him or anything I hate seeing people get mad at him for no new music when he’s just busy with other things i am worried of him losing fans because he’s so talented his music deserves to be heard by many but we also can’t blame fans for leaving I just wish for Dean to do whatever he wants to if he drops the album then he does and if he doesn’t then he doesn’t I just hope he will have support

we’re going round in circles here cause what I’m saying is that it’s very condescending to say things like “I think he doesn’t know how to follow up on trbl” or “maybe he’s not into this album as much as he wants to believe” when talking abt a man you’ve never met. never talked to. like I said, not only are your assumptions substantiated by nothing at all, but they’re a direct contradiction to Dean’s own words

you think he doesn’t have the psychological agency to know what he wants to do? you think he’s been working on smth nonstop for four years just because he somehow feels forced to? and that he doesn’t know what he’s doing? that is absurd and incredibly patronizing. he is a fully capable adult who can take care of himself and make his own decisions

the fact that you can’t even conceptualize a more rational reason as to why he’s been putting off the album release is wild to me

it’s not just you though. i don't wanna write up a whole socioeconomic essay but, these days, a lot of ppl seem to perceive music as just any other commodity that can be manufactured and mass-produced on demand, and think the norm is for artists to pump out at least an album per year. so if a certain artist doesn’t deliver new material in what they deem to be a timely manner, they get bored, or frustrated, or whatvr tf else, when that is just simply not how art works

does Dean repeatingly shoot himself in the foot by commiting himself to fake deadlines and unintentionally lying to fans in the process? YES, yes absolutely. i’ve said it before, i’ll say it again. i wish he would stop, it gets irritating over time. but even then. there comes a point when you need to take step back, as a person like if you’re really getting upset over smth so inconsequential maybe reevaluate

you’re also not the first person to make the fan argument but I think you’re severely overestimating the amount of fans Dean is losing or even the impact that those supposed losses have. Dean is not some underground up-and-comer, he’s a renown and respected artist with international commercial success, him losing a couple pressed “fans” is not gonna make a dent in his career like i promise if they have nothing better to do than get mad at some guy and leave bitch ass comments because they’re 7 layers deep into their parasocial delusions then they should go ahead and drop him, no one's gonna miss them

if you’re a genuine fan you’ll be there for the music when it comes and that is it

[tuffmallowinteractive]

Hello from a Dev in Need holy moly update: OMG thank you so much! You guys have more than helped out and I did not know it would happen so fast!!

Thank you all so much! It has only been two hours and the 500 goal has been met and then surpassed and then doubled! I am so humbled right now and yes I did cry- I ain’t shamed to say it! I’ll be taking this extra funding and putting it towards moving the hell out of here. We are still on our grind and I am still doing everything I can to complete the stories I love and hope you will come to love as well! I have a whole other post planned and I will throw it out in the morning. For now I have to thank all the people who donated and all the folks who reached out with well wishes and positive energy because I thank you all so much!!! Thank you again! 

I’ve been staring at this screen for a good while now. 

And I don’t know... man. I don’t know. 

That’s the thing. I feel like the last two years have been hard on everyone. Everyone. I’m no exception. I’m no one special. Each and everyone of us has lost something or someone. We’ve all struggled and tried our best and we’ve worked with what we’ve got. A lot of us have experienced a quality of life they weren’t used to, and in most cases didn’t deserve. 

And yes, I’m nobody special in that regard. But I am someone going through that. 

In October, the rental ban lifted in my state. A lot of landlords decided to make money back that they did not get from tenants on hard times during the ban by selling their properties. I was paid up until the next month when my landlord hit me with an eviction notice and raised the rent by $200. Since my lease was up it was either meet that demand or try to find a home and move which my family had not planned for. Well we scrapped up the funds in short notice and paid the rent. That’s when the landlord let me know he would not be renewing my lease, but instead the 30 day eviction notice and if I was late, he’d just file for eviction the next day. So we planned to do just that for a couple of months while we figured out a game plan. Eventually we decided we’d try for a January move and began packing our things. My son and I decided our Christmas would just have to come once we found and secured a stable place. And that’s fine.

But then my son got sick and an insurance bill hit us out of left field, and now we find ourselves back in the red at the crucial moment. We’re still down about $500 and I honestly don’t think we’ll make it in time. Rent’s due on the 7th. I’ve put everything on hold to deal with this. Those that know me well know I’ve not really been able to have time to access my pc let alone work on my projects- two of which are already at the finish line if I could only have the much needed time to work on them. 

We’re still working. I’m still working. We take turns packing and working. We’re trying to come up with the money for this and of course to find a better place. (Hopefully without an eviction making it more difficult) I try to stay connected with everyone via Discord so they know I’ve not fallen off the face of the earth and the games I promised are still very much under way and at the center of my heart. 

I just... I’m just I don’t know. I could offer commissions if ppl are interested. I could host a Kofi 30 day challenge. Though the challenge would have to be starting January. I have no idea what I could give in return that would make it worth while to invest in, but I’m most certainly willing if it means my little family and me won’t be evicted this Christmas. 

Hey. I’m not good at this. This is killing my pride. But I’m nobody so special that my pride is worth more than my home and my family. So if you can help at all, drop a line. This dev would surely appreciate it. 

UPDATE: This goal has been met and I just want to thank everyone who reposted and liked this post and just thank you because every form of kindness and even positive energy counts and I just love you all so much!

[crossdressingdeath]

This isn't necessarily abt LSZ, byt it annoys me when ppl are like " you must forgive the ppl who wronged you in order to be a good person"

Bcs some were raised passive, some are used to letting go, and learning to love yourself enough to be angry abt what happened is a rlly important and powerful message

I won't argue abt canon, bcs i have fic for it, but, as healthy as it is, it's also frustrating. LSZ has never been shown as a particularly assertive person, and him being angry at what happened would have been satisfying and shown that he's learned the lesson of not tearing yourself down for other's comfort ( which is more WWX to learn than his tbh, but whateves)

JL, on the other hand, who's angry and assertive and doesn't listen to anyone, him choosing to forgive and forget ( WWX) feels more powerful narratively, bcs it's an active choice, not something that's been trained into him, he chose to let go of the anger before to be more happy

So yeah, I've seen a lot of arguments, but i think this is what boils down to. We want passive characters, those who stood and suffered to get angry and validated, because so few of us ever get the chance to

Except... here's the thing. LSZ didn't learn to "tear himself down for others' comfort". He's a peacemaker, yes, he tries to resolve fights, yes, but that's just because he's the sort of person who prefers peaceful resolutions. Come on, that kid was raised by LWJ. I don't doubt for a second he was spoiled rotten. I think people forget that someone preferring to be quiet and gentle isn't the same as being passive; LSZ doesn't assert himself because... well, he doesn't particularly want to. He lets LJY do it for him, most of the time. I have on multiple occasions seen people insisting there's something wrong with LSZ/WWX and LWJ's parenting because LSZ doesn't like to start fights over things that don't matter at the end of the day, and like... there's nothing wrong with being the type to forgive others and let things go, so long as it isn't taken into doormat territory. LSZ chooses to forgive the Lans for their part in his family's deaths, because the Lans a) played a pretty small part on balance and b) have raised and protected him with love and care his entire life when they didn't actually have to do that; I'd argue that's just as powerful as JL forgiving WWX. It's just quieter. And LSZ does assert himself; he's just quiet about it. He doesn't shout like JL does, but he doesn't let himself be ignored either! Remember, it's LSZ who keeps the juniors from making a huge thing about LWJ tying WWX up with the forehead ribbon; the fact that he did it with a smile on his face and without ever raising his voice doesn't make that not assertive! In fact he seems to be the leader of the multi-sect duckling contingent; they all listen to him, even JL at least some of the time (which is more than most people get). Assertiveness and aggression are not synonymous.

So I guess what I'm saying is... why is it that JL is seen as assertive when he shouts and cries but can never get people to do what he wants (he can't even get LJY to stop calling him 'young mistress'!), while LSZ is seen as passive when he actually does get people to do what he wants without ever raising his voice? Why are screaming, crying tantrums (I love JL but. they are tantrums) assertive while calmly taking control of the group and leading them down the path you've decided is passive? Why should LSZ have to scream his anger to the heavens for it to be real? He's not angry at LWJ and WWX, because why would he be? He's not angry (or at least not more angry than anything else) at the Lans, because they're the family that raised him well. Why does it follow that he's not angry at the people actually responsible, people he never talks to and so has no opportunity to openly tear down for causing his family's deaths? And remember, LSZ temporarily leaves the sect to travel with WN (which he as a disciple would've had to get permission to do, by the way; I'd argue that going to LQR and saying "Hey, I'm gonna fuck off to Qishan with my fierce corpse uncle to learn more about my birth family" counts as asserting yourself!); it's partly to learn about his birth family, but I don't doubt he also wanted time to think about things away from the Lans.

You say his "passivity" is something LSZ was trained into, but... come on, look at the Lans. These are the most stubborn assholes in all the sects. They wouldn't be teaching him to be passive, they'd be teaching him to keep his cool while verbally eviscerating his enemies. He was raised to be polite and to show his elders the deference due to their age and experience; that doesn't make him passive. The only time we see him being anything close to passive is when Madam Mo is hurling insults at him, and I'd say that's more "customer service" than any actual passivity. He's expected not to make demands of his elders (hence why he doesn't go off on JC beyond the bounds of "Hanguang-jun says"), but I say again: he's clearly the social leader of his group. He's not passive, he just follows the example of his uncle (who once got two men who hated each other to swear oaths of brotherhood to make him happy; it wasn't a wise move in the long run, but it's impressive he got as far as he did!) and gets what he wants through diplomacy, rather than being intimidating enough to force people to do what he wants.

I... don't actually know where I'm going with this. I guess I just get annoyed whenever people talk like there's something wrong with LSZ (usually something about him being too passive) when... he's probably one of the mentally healthiest characters in the whole cast! This boy was raised well among people who love and care for him and because of that he's doing really well! He doesn't yell and cry when things don't go his way like JL because he was raised in an environment where he was treated with respect as a person, and he forgives the Lans not because he's been raised to passively take whatever's done to him as deserved (like WWX) but because he loves them, because they earned that love by being good to him. Why should that be seen as passive just because he doesn't yell about it?

[eldritch-araneae]

Bumblebee

Welcome to my long post about this boi because he's my fav ahah!

First impression:

In 2011 it I watched the first Transfromers baymovie. It was the "ohh he's an alien who quickly befriended a hum that so cool I love him!" thing, I so easy to please when it comes to interspecies relationships. I enjoyed the movies and Bumblebee quickly became my fav.

Then love for him solidified more and I found out about his G1 version and his info immediately spoke to me om personal level. He's cute, getting along human and seem gentle, but he also struggles with hiS place in the world and among his own friends.

It hit close to home.

Impression now:

I know I keep repeating myself a lot, but Bumblebee deserves a good writing! I want to see this original self with his struggles to be properly explored!

It only he wouldn't fall into " cute mascot of the show" box =/

He has so much potential for incredible character arc. This subject rarely appears, and if it does, it usually resolved quickly, which is not how it works.

In Plight of the Bumblebee from old marvel comics, he gets depressed ( yes, not just upset) about he don't feel belong among Autobots. He feels useless and even responsible for losing the battle ("If I were more help" ), firmly believing no one will notice if he's gone. He wishes to be a human because humans are weak, and if he was a human, someone would need him.

Then he just runs away without a word.

And then much later in Go for a Gold & Win if You Dare he compares himself to meteors, that burn in atmosphere before making any impact. And even if they do - they crush to pieces. Not to mention he constantly talks himself down ( "I'm not smart as Wheeljack", "I'm not strong as Grimlock") almost through entire the comic.

This this depressing as fuck, and believe me, just because your friends saved you or because you realized the importance of teamwork those feelings will not go away. Sure you will feel validated for few day, but they will come again, and again, and again.

He feels alienated from his own people, he feels weak, useless and unwanted, he has a constant need to prove himself, even if it kills him. His highest stat is courage, and this is probably why!

All this brings up an important question I haven't found a answer: what happened to him?!

Insecurities, especially like these, never appear out of thin air!

He shows signs of neglect at best, or abuse at worst.

Dreamwave's Guide said that Sunstreaker is bulling him and constantly makes fun of his failures in front other Autobots who laugh, believing it's just teasing. But cmon, I don't need tell you how damaging this shit is, especially when it's done for years.

But sadly, it's just a guide, it's not even a comic, so why?? Why not explore this??? Like seriously!

Even in TFA where it was shown that Bumblebee was abused in bootcamp, but the show never, ever made it a trauma, which is ridiculous! Optimus, Ratchet and Prowl had their own struggles, but Bumblebee must remain okay? As if being constantly picked up, and his legs being detached while he was locked isn't traumatizing enough??? I swear, people don't realized how bulling can break people and drive them to suicide ugh.

Another thing that bothers me is why Bumblebee needs to die (Goldbug) in order to become mature and stop stressing about what others thinks? And if he reverts back to Bumblebee, his insecurities are suddenly back as if nothing happened??

This is why I will not calm down until I see proper writing for him. I will demand his presence in each TF media and I don't care if fandom hates him xD

Because cmon, you can have a character with struggles and dark secrets who is also is full of hear and tender =/

Seriously, hire me Hasbro!

Favorite moment:

Ohhh there are so many across multiple continuities! I love every moment when he interact with his human friends and Windblade! ))) And generally Bumblebee is such delight to see, even if I picky about his looks ahah.

Idea for a story:

This is entirety of Sparkpulse! He not only has insecurities, but he has to deal with horrific trauma and phobias. He' not just a cute mascot or angry boi - this Bumblebee can do both!

He's like force of nature, a benevolent being who will bear many blessings to people he care about, to people who treat him kindness and respect...but if you wrong him, you will pay in full.

I explore a lot for ideas here. Like anger is not being inherently evil emotion, but a useful and powerful tool if controlled.

Or the fact that cute and kind character can be genially terrifying if he want to be.

He has so much compassion, but at the same time he can be relentless and merciless. Yet even here, he knows the price of life and will only resort to killing if literally anything else failed.

He's dedicated and wise, but also too hard on himself.

He's incredibly strong, but this strength is not limitless. Bumblebee must learn to rely on others, that it's okay to be weak, that he doesn't have to be useful in order to live.

This journey is long and full of hardship, but he's not alone and with his friends help he will let himself to make a first step towards healing.

Unpopular opinion:

I would only say that Bee is not bad character and actually can very complex. It's just Hasbro refuses to write him properly, sadly not many ppl see it and explore possibilities.

Oh well, I will have to do it myself then)

Favorite relationship:

I love his relationship with Windblade, like said in her post, it's very Ghibli like and full of love. I also love his relationships with humans! I would say much more, but I'm a bit tired and I don't know where to start.

Also his relationship with Starscream is such fun concept, that I will dive into it in my cont!

Favorite headcanon:

Oh gosh, there are way too many of them, the entire Sparkpusle is build on headcanons and ideas xD

[stanfordsweater]

@aftershocked

moving this here because you’ve brought up a TON of points i’d love to dig into and the tumblr reply system is garbage--

(under the cut: much talk of possessive sam vs. possessive dean, benefits of a long-running series, ooc actions vs. consistent characterization)

“they change a lot over 15 seasons but it's consistent enough” i feel like differences and inconsistencies in episodes/writing/seasons are one of the reasons (besides personal preference) that ppl get twisted around when it comes to possessive sam and possessive dean, like it’s easy to focus on one or two things w/o taking larger patterns or predominant characteristics into account.

also it’s easy to focus on like, smth happening a few times that is in contradiction to something that happened many other times, & not want to Deal with the complexities & contradictions—but the complexities are the best part! i’ve seen you talk about it before too, the benefits of a longrunning series where we get to really watch the characters grow from young men to essentially middle-aged,

you get to actually have characters w the kind of multifaceted personalities you’d expect of, like, normal people (just way more fucked up and traumatized). so yeah, dean isn’t always straightforward in the way he’s content with keeping sam with him, and can dip into weird behavior (ESPECIALLY in the sort of parental “i make the decisions around here” sense)—

but his general preference, his base character, does not lean towards possessiveness at all. versus sam, who SEEMS like he’d be more grounded and chill, but is actually the crazy jealous guy. that kind of irony, those kind of subversions, are what make them enjoyable as characters and contribute to why possessive sam is so much fun to explore,

bc you Wouldn’t think he’d be the one who’s jealous enough that even when dean gives sam so much of himself already, sam still wants more. you’d look at him and expect him to be the brother capable of letting go, of being halfway normal, instead of like, sam’s built so much on seeking dean’s approval and lived his life at the center of dean’s universe,

so he’ll reject anything that threatens to change that dynamic. like the contradictions are weird and spicy and i like them a lot and god i love sam’s reactions to benny so much. i’d feel bad bc i really like benny & he deserved better, but it’s too much fun to see how much sam of all people unreasonably, irrationally, illogically hates the guy,

just because he represents someone dean might, might, might possibly actually like more than sam (even though we, the viewers, know that’s impossible). beautiful

--

yes, you’ve hit on so many great points here! firstly, the inconsistencies in characterization: i think it’s very easy to see why people get annoyed by the writing, and i do think it’s occasionally justified; however, i’ve always found it a lot more rewarding to think about it as the same kind of inconsistencies that real people have! sam and dean might make “ooc” decisions and it’s okay because real people do that too, out of anger, resentment, sadness, trauma... it makes sense, to me, that they aren’t the same people they were fifteen years ago. getting stuck in one ‘mode’ of characterization is damaging to an overall reading of the show, but at the same time it’s okay to latch onto one era if that’s what you enjoy. it only bothers me when people take characterization from one era (for example, dean’s ptsd, anger, and jealousy over amelia) and apply it to every version of that character.

dean’s parental sense of possession over sam is one thing i do agree with wrt the possessive dean takes, and i think they’re more memorable for a lot of people because they’re not what you usually see from a family show-- it’s weird for dean to feel that way, and i don’t know if i’ve ever seen that intersection of parental ownership and romantic partner jealousy. it’s important that this comes out when dean is under pressure, not all the time-- AND it’s essential that sam does not cave to this. it gets iffy during dabb era, but i still don’t see sam immediately caving to dean’s demands. a good example is the scene where dean holds a gun to sam in season 15, which i see fairly often as an example of dean demanding obedience from sam... but sam doesn’t cave! and sam doesn’t even flinch, because he’s used to having guns pointed at him, and he knows that no version of dean could ever kill him. dean knows this too, and dean is the one who caves, as per usual. this is only not the case a few times in canon, like season 4, parts of season 7, and season 9, all for different reasons i won’t get into now. it’s remarkable when dean doesn’t go along with what sam asks, which is why it sticks in people’s memories, imo. dean is very loud with what he wants and what he thinks is best, but if sam disagrees he will argue dean around to his point, or he’ll go behind dean’s back to do it anyway (case in point, season 11 with the cage.)

anyway-- “the complexities are the best part!” and “you get to actually have characters w the kind of multifaceted personalities you’d expect of, like, normal people (just way more fucked up and traumatized). so yeah, dean isn’t always straightforward...” TOTALLY AGREE. i love the times when the brothers are making decisions that fandom disagrees with, because it’s interesting. the show is here to provide a compelling story. i’m not going to lie and say i always agree with that story or those choices, but it’s fun for me to try to get into why a character would make that decision, not just rail against it. i like the dudes we have in canon! they’re fun!

this is why possessive sam slaps for me. what you said here-- “sam, who SEEMS like he’d be more grounded and chill, but is actually the crazy jealous guy. that kind of irony, those kind of subversions, are what make them enjoyable as characters and contribute to why possessive sam is so much fun to explore” yes yes yes. 100%. and we see these subversions right from season one! it’s not new that dean isn’t actually the uber-confident womanizing asshole, but if you aren’t paying attention it can sneak up on you, i guess? and sam, who comes across as the level-headed one in common archetypes, the soft-spoken college boy, crashes the impala into a building. in the first episode. and in route 666, he  follows a crazy instinct that is proven correct and saves their lives (because he’s intelligent!) but toys with the chance that it could have failed and killed dean (because he’s reckless!)

the fact that we have all these examples of the ways the brothers fail to fulfill the tropes they would in a less-interesting tv show means that possessive sam makes so much sense. sam is built up as the independent brother, the one who left home, the rebellious one, but he loves his family and he needs dean. he needs him. “sam’s built so much on seeking dean’s approval and lived his life at the center of dean’s universe...” i love the way you put this. sam has had dean’s attention and protection for most of his life, and hell if he’s giving it up now for some two-bit vampire, lol. sam is independent, but like with everything else, dean is the exception. sam’s desperation for dean’s approval and attention is absolutely hilarious in the benny situation, because, like you’ve said before, benny is the least-threatening dude ever. he’s so nice. and the fact that sam won’t rest until he dies is-- well, i’m being a little uncharitable, i don’t think sam wanted benny to die, but he sure didn’t shed any tears over it.

the contradictions are delicious. i do think some of it is that dean gets his friendships fulfilled outside of sam, so sam is in a category all his own, while sam doesn’t have as many relationships as dean does so dean is fills all of his categories. but then again, that isn’t always true. it shifts over the seasons and even through episodes. broad trends!

[unohanadaydreams]

Okay I’m mentally prepared to ramble about the Hell Arc. No panels, just words.

The first blurb is definitely Ukitake speaking and I’d like to think it’s hiding some bitterness and regret, since he’s in hell, but you know I’m not gonna hold on to hope that it’s anything deep.

Orihime being resigned to laundry as well as just NOT knowing where her son is??? I’m sorry the same Orihime that can sense Ichigo like it’s her fucking job? But y’know uwu it’s okay to be a housewife and this is definitely Kubo showing off his depth of feminist theory and not shoving Orihime in the background bc wife clean and cook and nothing else ooga booga.

Kon as a babysitter is horrifying. The implication that they’ve kept him as a teddy bear for all these years is even more so. Like damn you can’t ask Urahara for ONE gigai after you saved the world, Ichigo? Hope youre paying him a living wage for helping you navigate the terrible twos. Tbh I think it would’ve been better to have a new sidekick and for Kon to be working for Urahara now.

Okay I do think the kid sending souls to Hell on accident is pretty funny. But also it’s definitely Kubo forgetting that Orihime is in the picture and Kazui is not Ichigo. He has more than Isshin; he has Orihime as his mom. He has someone who cares very much that he’s still in his bed and is someone he would talk to about uuuuh sending ppl through a portal. I know women are a different species and are incredibly hard to grasp because of that so it’s okay Kubo.

Ichika being taught by Ikkaku and to a lesser extent Yumichika is very good. Love that enough to gloss over my disappointment at Rukia not teaching her. I just know Byakuya is probably a lil bitter about it too. Rukongai rats 1 Noble clan 0

Booooo Kubo, get off the stage. Pointing out Orihime is at home doing laundry does not fix that she’s there. If she’s not gonna stop Kazui from doing whatever the fuck she might as well be eating bad ramen too.

MAYURI MY BELOVED. You’re so right, king, Urahara is a tasteless capitalist unlike you, who fully commits to the too-organic technological horrors the Seireitei deserves.

Did Kubo forget how to draw Rangiku? Why the fuck is her face so moe. Some of the women look pretty off in the face over all but with Rangiku it’s jarring. I know her face got more moe somewhere in tybw arc but jfc it’s worse here.

I find it hard to believe that Shunsui would stick to a tradition that demands all lieutenants be away and in the human world all at once but maybe he just doesn’t give a shit about anything nowadays. Depression is leading the Gotei 13 now.

It’s not a Bleach surprise attack unless a woman is grievously injured right off the bat.

That being said, I do enjoy the two new lieutenants. The hakama shorts are a Choice but they work somehow. Also a zanpakuto being on nails is fun.

Kira and Akon ❤️ I’m glad Kubo retconned the novels so Kira could make his entrance in a hoodie and black tabi. Hope he gets more depressing and bitter moments tho. Also Akon having so much panel space…..I’ll never recover.

Hell Szayel is so fucking horny which is astounding considering like everything he did was a sex joke in Hueco Mundo arc. His sex appeal has aged like fine wine. Also pure comedy that Ichigo can only ask who he is. If only Uryu were there 😔

So did they have ceremonies for Gin and Kaname because if not then???? Like I understand it’s impossible to make this gel 100% bc its not based on anything other than wanting characters to come back as cool demons and is actively working against previous canon but c’mon. They would’ve noticed before this when no ceremony for Gin and Kaname was held and their reishi haunted everyone via molasses rain drops.

That being said, I love love love the concept of characters coming up from Hell with not holes within them but outside them. They do not need to consume others to feel completion, they are consumed to the point of wanting to fill others. Don’t you recognize me? Don’t you see what you’ve done? Don’t you long to fill that hole inside of you, too? All it takes is dying to reach that nirvana of knowing who you are and what you feel in swirling completion. Even fallen, the fruit of knowledge is divine.

I want Ukitake to say he’s glad Shunsui lived to his face while looking so heartbroken that he didn’t get to live too. I want these two to cry across from one another with a flashback to their idyllic youth. I want it *grabby hands*

Sosuke Aizen has disappeared as in dead? Or are they counting ‘out of Seireitei’ as disappeared. Honestly 50/50 whether he’ll have a form of cameo. On one hand he’s incredibly popular, on the other hand Kubo was floundering with him during tybw so I can’t imagine he gives a shit to bring him back.

As far as new lore for hell butterflies goes, I guess we’ll see how interesting it gets but I highly doubt it’s going to get a lot of thought.

With the way Kazui is smiling, it makes me wonder if someone taught him about the shrine and sending souls to hell. Does he recognize the door? Is Kubo implying that Ukitake has had contact with Kazui? I mean, it would make a LOT of sense considering the fish he was riding, the ritual he knows. It would also make sense why the soul reaper badge was highlighted; Ukitake has been around in some capacity before officially being stomped to hell???

Definitely me thinking too much about it but also there’s no way Kazui just knows this shit without someone from Hell telling him about it even covertly.

This entire arc set up definitely seems like it’ll bring some worthwhile angst and maybe some moments for the more unexplored characters if characters like Akon getting screen time is any education.

Overall not hoping for anything other than good Hell designs and seeing characters do things.

If I don’t see Kenpachi with his beefy titties out I will be disappointed. That’s my bare minimum.

[420pogpills]

i think my issue with how ppl have treated dream over this issue is how it goes against the whole “educate not cancel!!” rhetoric twitter has when they actually have to watch the education happen. when dream has been criticised previously for insensitive comments or ignorance they’ve been things he’s visibly grown from already, so ppl have been able to just brush it off. but when it comes to a new situation like this one where dream is being held accountable for something recent and is going through the process of educating himself by following all these accounts that discuss these issues (in the midst of getting shit on for completely unrelated unfair reasons and ppl trying to DOXX him), suddenly ppl aren’t willing to wait or trust that he’ll grow. he’s acknowledged he was wrong and is taking steps to correct it, which is what twitter always says they want. it just kind of shows that ppl don’t actually practice what they preach, they just go with the rhetoric that makes them comfortable.

yeah i totally get what you mean 💚 this got super long so i'm putting it under here :)

so here's the thing - there's no crash course to being a good person. you learn what's right and wrong as you grow older, as you make mistakes, as you speak to many different people and get many different opinions. my issue with everything is that people will call dream out, and then once he apologises, they think okay that's it, he's never going to fuck up on this again! but it doesn't work that way.

i've touched on this before but i firmly stand by it - growing up in a morally right, open-minded environment is a PRIVILEGE. a privilege that not everyone has. because the thing is, when you're being raised with let's say racist or homophobic views - they're not telling you that these views are wrong! they're not telling you that you're doing the wrong thing, they're teaching you these things to you like it's the norm. so you don't grow up believing you're saying and thinking terrible things, you grow up thinking these things are just normal and they aren't hurting anyone. so alongside educating yourself on important issues, on things that are hurtful, you also have to work even harder to unlearn everything you've been taught. and that is the hardest part!

so if you were raised under questionable circumstances, or you grew up being taught certain political views, or you spent hours upon hours online playing games with strangers who's moral compasses are almost non-existent - that will have a massive impact on you. you have to put in SO much work to unlearn the bad and the ugly. and learning something new is so much easier than unlearning something you grew up believing, especially when the lines were totally blurred for you.

so the issue with social media today, is that people expect this change to happen overnight. it really just does not work that way. does it make it okay for people to be ignorant, micro-aggressive, naive? of course not. but it's something they will learn with time. we don't have as much control over our brains as we would like to think we do.

take intrusive thoughts for example - you cannot stop that. if you think of something scary, it's near impossible to force your brain to stop thinking about it. same with plenty of other emotions. your brain will function differently compared to your experiences in life. it takes YEARS to figure out how to get along with your brain, and how to teach yourself to be a good person, how to unlearn the things you always thought were normal things but as you grew up, you realise those things are hurtful to others.

dream is young and he is naive and he puts far too much trust in this fandom. i appreciate the love he has for us, but i think he's digging himself into holes much deeper than necessary by blindly defending the actions of certain dream fans. i'm sure he will learn one day, but until then, he will fuck up. he will make mistakes, and some of those mistakes will be the same ones from his past. but people need to understand how long it takes for you to change your way of thinking. because he's human.

i personally sympathise with him because i did not at all have the privilege of being raised in an open minded environment. i've been working so hard for many years now to change myself, to open my eyes, to listen, to realise that so much of what i was taught is not acceptable. i am proud of who i'm becoming but i'm not there yet. i still have internalised issues, i still struggle with intrusive thoughts and my predisposition. the difference is, i don't have 23 million people, and some more, constantly on my back, treating me like making a mistake makes me somehow deserving of being completely torn down and apart. you have to give people room to grow. backing them into a corner every week is not going to do that. more than likely, eventually it will just have the opposite effect.

i'm not asking for anyone to forgive him or let him off for everything - just that offering a bit of compassion sometimes wouldn't hurt. look out for the change you hope to see in him. if more time goes by and you fail to see it, you can make the choice whether you walk away or not. but you won't change him by forcing him to. we don't need force, we don't need demands, we need to encourage and assist, and learn for ourselves too!

[papers4me]

Fruits Basket,Se03, Ep 8 (part 2)

I finally got my answer on how will kyo’s confession of kyoko will be & how tohru will react. I love the writing, the pacing, the monologue, the dialogue, the facial expressions, tohru’s reaction, kyo’s rejection & tohru’s shock. Even yuki & akito’s involvement! All of it was a chef’s kiss!

I went & watched lots of eps of se01 & 2 & I’m loving all the hints they dropped abt kyo & how his trauma was looming over him all. this. damn. time! Unfortunately, it has reminded me of how much tohru’s own character exploration was diminished in favor of her being the angelic mother & the sohma’s fixer! but moving on & focusing on her shining moment now! I’ll explore her character here with regards of her trauma, real hidden character & future development.

Kyo’s rejection is the best thing that has ever happened to tohru:

(don’t hate me before you read!) XD~ just like you, I’m mad at kyo for hurting tohru & I feel her pain. However, the writer didn’t write this with a sadistic desire to hurt us. Kyo’s rejection is the core of the entire story as it is not only connected to kyo’s trauma, but tohru’s growth & yuki’s emotional involvement with the two, as well as akito’s insecurities. I have explained in my review( part 1) how kyo rejecting tohru was a logical progression of kyo’s trauma, the only possible outcome from his perspective, & the themes tied with such decision. Now, I’ll explain why this rejection is good for tohru in the long run:

1. Showing the hidden ugly side: (The timid, shy, self-sacrificing girl is angry!): Tohru’s entire consciously constructed personality is borrowed from elements in her mom & dad’s life:

She mimicked her dad’s overly polite style to prove that she is indeed his daughter, so her mom won’t be called w*ore & to console her mom, so she wont leave her. She has deep low self-worth issues. I gotta become someone else to be loved.

she has inner fear of bringing shame to her mom’s name, wants to always be the good girl so mom’s get praised for raising her. Thus, hiding ugly aspects such as anger, loud voice & frustration.

She wants to prove that her mom chose right by not neglecting her. wishes to be worth needing & loving for her own self.

All she ever wanted since being a 4 year old child is her mom. No other desire for anything else at all. Since her mom’s death, she’s been lost on what to do, who to be, what to want! then it came to her to stick to her mom’s memory & live for her. Living for a dead person is a self-sacrifice decision. Tohru just didn’t see herself outside of her mom’s influence.  

Ever since meeting kyo, he has been encouraging real aspects of her character: be selfish, complain, cry, get mad, yell, look pathetic, expose unflattering thoughts, show undesirable side, ask for things, no, DEMAND things. She has been reluctantly following his advice & only showing that to him. His confession & inability to accept her love has lead her to show the real hidden tohru behind the “ i’m okay” mask:

The timid, always smiling girl is now showing anger, frustration, stubbornness & determination.

screaming her heart out: “ i don’t believe my mom would say that” stating her opinion in firm voice.

 “even if she did, I have to go against her” the real tohru shows her explosive personality that was buried deep down! it is NOT mom’s life anymore. It is MINE. I decide. I choose. I want. My decisions.

“ why can’t you see that?” argues with him. Tohru, who is soft-spoken & tends to get flustered  when others insist, is now questioning his decision with passion & fierceness!

“ I love you no matter what”. Say what toy want. look at yourself as a monster, a murderer, a loser or a coward. I don’t care what your brain or trauma makes you think. I see the real YOU & it is my decision! I love you ugly & pretty, sad & happy, broken or strong, coward or brave. I take it all & no one is fooling me or changing my mind. I’m my own person & I chose YOU. 

 2. Letting go of attachments: Learning to LIVE:

Tohru’s attachment to her mom isn’t healthy. It’s  toxic as it hinders her from being her own person. To be able to love kyo, she lets go of “ listening to mommy’s words” . Apparently, her mom condemned kyo as unforgivable. Tohru knows the real kyo & doesn’t even care for forgiveness despite her mom’s alleged words. Breaking the toxic bond. She formed a healthier bond with kyo. However, if kyo is unable to accept this love. what would tohru do? die?? kill herself?? kyoko wasn't able to continue to love her husband cuz he died. her reaction was neglecting her daughter & roaming away in utter grief. Tohru mustn’t follow her mom’s example. Not all loved ones leave us out of hate. Some leave each other cuz of death (kyoko/tohru), ( kyoko/ katsuya), Others might leave each other out of current traumatic pain, mental health, emotional hindrance despite loving each other so dearly (kyo/tohru). If kyo despite his immense love to tohru, can’t forgive himself, they won’t be together. tohru can cry, scream, yell, but if he doesn't overcome his issues & come back, tohru gotta let go. She gotta learn to let go & not kill herself over what she cant have.

Kyo, on the opposite, gotta learn to hold on to loved ones! Let go of pain but hold on to real ppl not dead ghosts of the past. He must learn to act on his own desire & need for tohru. Only when he forgives himself, he’ll hold on to her. It is then, that tohru will decide again if she’ll have him or not.

3- Wanting things doesn't mean you WILL have them: (You are enough by yourself- moderation)

tohru wants kyo, the first thing she has ever wanted. However, she won’t  automatically get him just because she now learned to demand things. There are obstacles that can stop that. Tohru must accept kyo’s inability to be with her now & live healthily regardless. This ties to akito as well. She wants the zodicas but she cant have them! Emotional distance separate them. What will akito do if she can’t have what she wants? kill kurno? kill tohtru? kill herself? will this bring the zodiacs back? NO. You are enough by yourself. She needs to let go & learn to accept that love means acceptance between the involved parties, emotional connection isn't enough.

-Realistic depiction of romantic relationship progression: (thro better & worse). EPIC writing!

It is indeed fate that brought tohru back in kyo’s path 4 months after her mom’s death & the they do share a mutual past: kyoko. However, fervor grateful to the author for writing them falling in love together isn’t due to fate, coincidence, mutual past or similar personalities. Kyo consciously avoided tohru while tohru herself struggled to understand kyo initially. The author spend valuable time building their romantic relation based on mundane daily life activities. They themselves don’t quite know when exactly that they fell in love. when they recalled falling in love, we see them cooking together, talking, walking, eating, studying & opening up abt small struggles.

It is genius that the writer will add yet another realistic aspect. While kyo was able to read tohru & approach her when she’s down, this doesn't mean he magically understood her & will forever be on the same page & never ever hurt each other at all. If you fell in love, you are bound to be hurt by the person who loves you back as much as be happy together. It is realistic!!! Adding miscommunication & personality differences enrich the relationship. This relationship isn’t just fluffy & lovey dovey. They have realistic issues that they need to work on by communicating. Even communication  wont solve their quarrel if it isn’t done in the right time & with the right desire to connect.

-The weight & future lessons learned from of “ I’m disappointed in you” for both kyo & tohru:

Right now kyo is too emotional to connect & tohru herself is too emotional to understand his response. Tohru understands his pain but her low self-esteem prevents her from seeing that he is rejecting being loved , not rejecting her. He is not rejecting tohru as a person but rejecting kyo as a person deserving love. Thanks to his “ i’m disappointed in you” which really leaves no room for interpretation from tohru’s perspective. I love that!!!! Kyo isn’t good with words. This has been clear from ep 1, his actions has always been his love language, but now he couples bad words “ i’m disappointed in you” with bad actions: running away. This is a perfect opportunity to build their future relationship on a solid foundation: ( off course I’m not belittling their current emotions, I understand why each is very broken now, but I’m talking abt future learning lessons)

Kyo’s current mistake: While him rejecting tohru is justified by the extreme trauma & is logical from his perspective. This doesn’t mean it isnt’t hurtful to her. He chose hurtful words to push her away mimicking how he pushed her in the true form arc. Perfect example of justified mistake yet still a wrong mistake. Thus, kyo needs to learn the effect of his words, he shouldn’t be punished for the past, for tings her cant control, nor for fate. But he should take responsibilities of the present, of what he actually says & does right now.  He must fix this mistake with tohru. This is a mistake that CAN be fixed. someone that he CAN get back. a mistake he CAN stop repeating.He CAN hold on to her with immense desire yet allow room for her to decide for herself.

Tohru’s current mistake: Seeing herself solely thro being loved by kyo. she cant see that he indeed loves her cuz he rejected her. Rejection in tohru’s mind equal lack of love. Her mom left her, thus her mom didnt love her. This respective is very justified due to her trauma, & it is logical that she reached this conclusion. She isnt in his head, she cant know whats in his heart if his words say sth else. However, having a logical perspective doesn't mean it is right. it is still wrong to solely exist thro what you can see & hear. Real emotions run deeper. We must take things with moderate approach. Tohru needs to have higher self-esteem, to allow room for misunderstanding without completely breaking down. In her future life, she’ll be in lots of situations where ppl could hurt her intentionally or unintentionally. She needs to take things with calmer pace & open the door in her mind for doubt & better judgement. As much as loved ones words hurt, to build a healthy relationship, you must leave room for communication & misunderstanding. Hence, you’ll get closer & closer. 

Side Notes:

 I love tohru’s faulty attachment thro only being loved back exactly as she pictures in her mind. it is so human, so real, & so endearing! Very opposite of se01 & 2 image of her being the wise, device-giving mother with right thing to say & do. Screw that unrealistic image! allow tohru to be real! best ep ever! Hopefully, no more of this tohru!

Kyo’s constant repeat of mistakes is the best character trope done right! so realistic. It is genius that the author used this trope to humanize the demonic cat spirit!! what screams human better than the most annoying human trait: repeating mistakes!!!!  Kyo, my son! it’s time to learn! cant wait to see how the author will do that.

young boy/ adult woman friendship? Was that ever made without  disgusting sexualizion? kyoko isnt much of a mom figure to kyo, she tells me abt a husband, child neglect mistakes, custody! he calls her old hag & pushes her! XD. it is friendship!!

i’m mad they didnt focus on tohru’s face when she screamed at kyo confessing her love.. that's tohru moment. Why pan on yuki? you could’ve showed his reaction after she spoke. The same thing was done when tohru confessed to Isuzu!-_-! loved her angry face tho, it was beautifully drawn, so thanks for that. XD

Yuki is forever the best tohru/kyo shipper & the best tohru-happiness defender. I love how he runs after kyo & yet checks on tohru! I’m curious tho, he didnt hear any of kyo/kyoko confession as he was asleep, only the the “ forgive/not forgive line” so, he’ll be wondering forgive what? tohru’s mom knows kyo? I’m excited on how they’ll put things into context. also, I LOVE YUKI.

I’m forever thankful that everything akito is pushed into next ep. The knife wielding action & akito’s dramatic outbursts would’ve stolen from the emotional weight of kyo’s confession. Kyo’s secret is the core of furuba since ep, 1, the entire dynamics of kyo/tohru/yuki /kyoko/ hat is established based on this ep. Shoving akito, too, would create the same annoying train bullet feeling of momiji’s & tohru’s ep (ep 5 & 6). Emotional scenes pushed together with lesser time for the respective characters to have their well-deserved focus.

This is the most I am attached & satisfied with furuba! it scares me since ep 9 continues the climax. My fears of potential dramatic animation since the knife is there! moreover, akito’s own animation is always over the top. I hope they tone it down to portray her as a human more than a maniac.

Also, I hope they dont drag the climax more than that. What more you can shove in the dramatic raining weather. Tohru/kyo scene here matched the true arc scene bringing back parallel. Now akito/tohru raining scene next ep will match se02, ep10 scene. Now, what will the author do to defuse the climax? Often writing the falling action is harder than the climax itself. Falling action doesnt mean happy times & solving issues. It means dealing with the consequences of the climax. Let’s see what the writer has in store.

Based on the flashbacks, Kyoko didnt have ill feelings with kyo!!!! Until the last time he saw her as a child, she was happy with him. Even when he pushed her, she took it as a childlike behavior. at the accident, she didnt have much time to have any ill feelings. No way she thought he pushed her, no way she thought he could’ve saved her. So if she really recognized him, why would she say “ I wont forgive you”? it doesnt make sense at all. Kyoko doesn't hate kyo!!!! So, either he imagined, which is sth that I’ll hate so much! I spent so much emotions attached to a non existant words! NO. plz! NO!! Other possibility, she said sth else closer to the words! but then again how would we know? I NEED to know! ~ as expected, I’m still attached to this damn line! XD. 

Kyo depressed in the mountains after kyoko’s death was very vaguely referenced in (1) se01, ep24 when kyo talked to kazuma! oh shoot! (2) in se02, sp 2 when kazuma thought back to kyo nearly killing himself in depression before meeting the dad, (3) in se02, ep 9 when kyo trampled on the flower! oof! i love this subtle style of writing! connecting the emotional dots! EPIC!

Various characters throut seasons 1, 2 & 3 noticed the real gentle kyo towards tohru: (1) Isuzu’s “ I hope tohru meets someone like haru, to gently open the door” se02, ep19. (2) Momiji having faith that kyo is the right person for tohru & pushing him, (3) yuki constantly musing over tohru/kyo love & drawing inspiration on wanting “ his own person to love like them” (3) Kisa saying kyo is kind to tohru se3, (4) shigure saying, you are exclusively kind to tohru se02, (5) Airisa saying, when will kyo confess in se01, (6) hana saying, marry my sister in the play & pushing him to not be locked! (7) yuki kicking him for saying “ its not your business” to tohru in kyoto trip, (8) kakeru saying “ kyo’s her boyfriend? “ AA~~~~ the whole cast know & can see his love to her!!! TOHRU! He doesnt hate you! KYO!! the entire cast thinks you DESERVE HER & is KIND! not a monster! Is there an image set of those moments of the cast saying that here in tumblr? kindly mention me to see it! I fear going to the tags & seeing spoilers T_T.

[rodneymckays]

mckay and katie brown or mckay and keller?

oh boy 🙈 where to begin! i find the rodney & katie relationship to be interesting because of how it fell apart. i was intrigued by the effort rodney put behind being a "good" boyfriend to katie, like those scenes in tabula rasa, him taking her to the infirmary when she was ill, and sitting vigil while she recovered (altho im hard pressed to remember any other moments like that 😅). especially after sg1 and a season and a bit of atlantis watching him crash and burn with women, either oblivious to their advances or making completely offside comments to them. but the whole proposal thing is what really pulled me in. i see rodney as the type of guy who probably, definitely, has the whole picket fence, wife, 2.5 kids goal in his head, but its entirely abstraction. he's got pressure from the outside (his sister) telling him this is his last, best chance for happiness. so, in quarantine he's gonna propose. except a seemingly near death experience makes him realize, "woah, im not ready for this!" and to her credit, neither is katie, at least not with rodney. she sees, well, not the best side of him that episode. and i don't know if their relationship falls apart after this because she was confronted with his negativity and didn't like it, or because he wasn't ready to marry her, or because he was going to propose and she felt it was too soon. i have no clue. but what i did find interesting about the whole deal is it almost but not quite forces rodney to really consider, is marriage what i really want? is this going to make me happy? with this person? am i doing this because im afraid of being alone? i really wanted to see him wrestling with this stuff.

on the other hand, personally, i can't say i find the rodney & jennifer relationship particularly interesting or believable. on the surface, im sure there is a lot ppl can find cute about it, but its not for me. for one, i didn't really like how it started (the whole rodney vs ronon love triangle just wasn't it for me. i didn't like the teammates being pit against each other, their relationship potentially suffering, for a fairly newly established character's affections, especially considering ronon's dead fiancee). it sorta felt like every nerd-gets-the-hot-girl story, except maybe less deserved in this case (and ugh, im sorry if this is making jennifer sound like a prize to be won with no agency, because thats gross and it was obviously her choice to date rodney, but thats just how it appeared to me as a viewer). don't get me wrong, i love rodney. but his treatment of women just ain't it. and he didn't particularly grow in this department throughout the series.

this may be a bit controversial, but if rodney had to be with anyone, and that person had to be a woman, i would rather have seen him with elizabeth or teyla. i bring elizabeth into this discussion because he respected her more than most anyone else in the series, man or woman. at the end of s1, when colonel everett barges into the gate room, making demands, rodney physically turns his back on him and addresses elizabeth by name when conveying information, making it clear she's the one in charge and calling the shots. she's the one who earned his, and the rest of the expedition's, respect. i say this all the time, but he wrote a book about her. they may not have always agreed, but there was definitely a bond there.

ask me more!

[rainywritingsx]

Scenario: Shoji, Todoroki and Midoriya protecting their very shy s/o

Request: Would you be okay writing about Shoji, Shoto and Izuku protecting a very shy s/o? Maybe someone is mean to them or there's something falling from somewhere. S/o can't stand up to ppl (maybe s/o is also not in the hero course but in u.a.?) thamk so much and have a nice day ~the one you matched with shoji btw lol

oh hi there :D this request is so cute, I hope I did okay with writing it! You didn’t specify whether you wanted  a scenario or headcanon, so I went with scenarios, hope that’s okay. Have fun reading!

xxx Damla

Reminder that as of right now, requests are closed!

Warnings: none :)

words: 2670

If you’d like to give me a small tip, you can buy me a coffee! ^^

Shoji Mezo

As soon as the bell rang, I pretty much jumped out of my seat and left the classroom. Finally, I can leave. This class isn’t particularly my favourite, which is due to the fact that I don’t have any friends here. Most of them, as well as my boyfriend, are in the hero course.

When I arrived at my locker, I was surprised not to find Shoji waiting as usual. Maybe he had to train? Right at that moment my phone beeped. I opened my bag and took it out. Shoji had texted me.

I’m sorry love, I was training in teams with Tokoyami and he got injured. I will be there in 10 minutes

A soft smile spreads across my face. He really is one of the most caring people I know. While I’m not exactly happy to be alone, it’s most likely that some of Shoji’s classmates can be found in the cafeteria, so I will just go there.

I open my locker and quickly take out the books I need after lunch. Luckily there aren’t many, since I only have English and then PE. I close it again and zip up my backpack before making my way to the cafeteria. Luckily it isn’t that far, and the halls are empty.

I look outside out of the large windows. The sun is shining brightly, and it's clear that it’s spring. Many flowers have bloomed, and I see a lot of birds. There are people having their lunch outside, some are even training. Wow, that’s some dedication… My eyes land on Jirou, who is sitting at a table with Yaoyorozu. Our gazes meet and she smiles before patting the spot next to her. Alright, I guess I’ll eat outside too.

I make my way towards the door. It’s pretty heavy, but thankfully I manage to open it. I’m about to run up to the girls, but I freeze when I hear what I think is the door slamming against someone.

“Oi! What the fuck!” I turn around wide eyed, to see someone whom I thought to be a student of my homeroom class. I don’t remember his name, but he has never been very nice to me. Something gives me the idea that I’m in trouble. I gulp and slowly walk backwards on the grass, but soon my back hits a wall.

“I-I’m so-”

“you’re sorry?” he interrupts, taking a step closer to me. I cower slightly. His closeness is making me way too uncomfortable. “Yeah, you better be! Maybe if you stopped daydreaming about your stupid boyfriend from class 1-A you’d actually notice your surroundings.” I’m speechless. A billion thoughts are running through my head. I want to curse at him for talking about Shoji like that, but my body isn’t doing anything. It’s like I’m glued to the brick wall my body is resting against

“You’re gonna pay for-”

“It was an accident.” An indescribable amount of relief comes over me when Shoji stands in front of me. His right hand reaches behind him for mine, and I immediately hold it. It’s only now that I realise my hands had been shaking the whole time, just like my legs. The guy who was almost yelling at me a second ago, now has a smirk on his face but I can tell he’s a little intimidated.

“Still, your partner should look where they’re going.” I can’t see any of their faces, but by his posture I can tell that Shoji remains completely calm and unfazed as usual.

“Okay,” he calmly responds. “I’m sure you’ve given them enough of a scare, so they’ll be more careful in the future. Still, I don’t think it was okay for you to talk to them like that. That wasn’t exactly behaviour fit for a UA student.” he didn’t even comment anymore, but just bowed to us both and apologised, his tone shaky. Before I knew it he was gone. He was all talk, I knew it.

Shoji turns back to me, still holding my hand and I smile. “Thank you, Shoji.” I can see his eyes moving upwards a bit, which shows he’s smiling too.

“No need to thank me. I guess it isn’t always bad to look scary to people.” I can’t help but laugh at that. Shoji’s appearance is something that he’s insecure about, so knowing that he can joke about it a bit makes me happy.

However, I can’t help but feel bad for not being able to have said anything to that guy when he was insulting Shoji. And I was sure he heard it too…

“I’m sorry.” I sigh, looking down in shame. For a moment, there's silence. Then I see Shoji’s feet taking another step closer to me. His other hand grabs mine as well.

“Can you look at me, please?” his tone wasn’t demanding, rude, or angry. He’s calm, it’s a simple request. He gives me the idea that even if I said no it would be fine, but I look at him nonetheless.

“Y/n, I really don’t care that much about people like that. He doesn’t know me, or you. I only care about what you and the other people in my life think. You don’t need to defend me. I know people like that don’t change minds easily.” I have to admit that he’s right. I mean, I don’t even know his name, so why did I care that much?

“Let’s go, I saw you were on your way to Jirou and Yaoyorozu, right? Tokoyami is there too now.”  I nod and Shoji is about to walk, but he stops when he realises I’m still standing. I smile and walk over to him, stand on my toes and kiss his cheeks. A giggle leaves my mouth when I see his eyes have widened. Even though I would usually have the same reaction, today is different.

“Yep, I’m ready now.”

Todoroki Shouto

Of course, as soon as one person found out I’m dating Shoto, the news spread around the school like fire. Of course I notice the glances at me in hallways, the quiet whispers, the way that people approach me now. Some act nicer, but there also some that seem to suddenly dislike me. And I can’t do anything about it.

In theory I can, but I’ve never been able to even tell someone that their tone was rude, or that something was uncalled for. I’ve even been called names sometimes, and when people see my flustered face, they laugh and throw more insults at me.

Despite all this, Shoto isn’t aware. I never told him, and I’m not planning to. He already has enough going on for him and what has been happening to me just seems like a mild inconvenience at this point. It’s times like this where I’m glad that he isn’t the type of person to keep pushing if he wants to know something.

And of course this happens today too, as I’m walking to the hero course department of UA. I can already hear some people snicker at the fact that I’m even here. I ignore it, because as usual, I don’t want to cause a scene.

My eyes scan the hallway. His classroom is supposed to be somewhere here, but where? Idiot, y/n, you had to ask him what class he currently is in. Now I have to check everywhere.

I don’t see any students from 1-A so he definitely has a class right now. At least I know something. I look through the windows in the doors, but every classroom is empty. Why are there even so many classes here? Maybe I can ask a teacher what subject 1-A has right now. Wait, but isn’t that weird? No, they probably know that I’m looking for Shoto.

In my train of thought, I completely forget my surroundings. So it’s no surprise that I bump into someone and fall on the ground. I hiss when my knees graze the floor, but then remember that that was a person that I bumped into. I look up and my eyes widen when I see Monoma from class 1-B. He looks down at me with a smirk and laughs at my confused state.

“Look who’s here. Looking for your boyfriend?” Without thinking, a billion apologies leave my mouth as I place my books that had fallen earlier back into my bag. My knees feel like they’re burning but I’m more worried about what just happened.

“Wow,” Monoma chuckles. I can feel his eyes on me as I finally zip up my bag and get up. “Can’t even walk properly. I knew that the other departments were losers, but this?” My grip on my bag tightens as he speaks.

“Well, at least you’re kinda good-lookingI guess. Still, I would’ve thought someone from 1-A would go for a person who’s way better than you.” In surprise, I lift my head up. Of course the thought of Shoto deserving better has crossed my mind before. He’s the son of the current number one hero, of course people expect someone who’s the opposite of me. I always try to tell myself it’s amazing I even got into UA at all, but at times I cannot help but wonder if it would be better for Shoto to leave me.

“You know it too, don’t you?” Monoma continues. “No need to tell me, I can see it in your eyes. You want to say so much, but you’re way too much of a coward to do it.” he laughs and looks away for a moment.

“That’s why everyone picks on you and your sweet prince charming has no idea. You can’t even stand your ground, how pathetic. Nobody understands what he even sees --” his voice trails of. Monoma moves his head to his side, and his grin widens.

“Ah, there he is, just as I was speaking about him!” I turn around and gasp when I see Shoto walking in our direction. Shit. He saw it all, didn’t he?

“Your prince charming just knows when to save you, huh? I mean, with such a weak significant other, I probably-”

“My classes are done, let’s go y/n.” Todoroki says, completely ignoring Monoma’s presence. He grabs my hand and is about to walk away.

“One more thing.” he says as he turns around and looks at him.

“Y/n is the best partner I could ask for, and if all you care about is what their education is, you are the disappointment here.” he glances back at me and grabs my hand with a small smile. “Let’s go.”

Midoriya Izuku

The silent aura of the library usually brings me at peace, but today, as I’m entering it by myself, I feel uneasy. A part of me feels like everyone’s eyes are burning through me. So, I keep my gaze down and just walk over to a random bookshelf. As I lift my head again and look through some books, I try nonchalantly scanning the library for any sign of my boyfriend, but Izuku is nowhere to be found.

My phone buzzes in my pocket, so I quickly grab it and see that Izuku texted me.

“I’m sorry sweetheart, I had to help Kaminari with something related to Hero Studies. I’ll be there soon. I love you ❤︎.”

He’s too sweet. I text him back, assuring him that it’s okay and put my phone back in my pocket. Maybe I should pick one book and read it until Izuku comes here, or else I’ll be bored doing nothing. Also, I feel like people keep whispering about me here.

Izuku may not be the most popular student of this school, but people definitely know of him. I mean, he’s a class 1-A student, he worked at Nighteye’s agency, and has done more impressive stuff. So obviously, when he gets in a relationship people will talk about it. While I do get it, I also hate the attention it brings. People have been mostly nice to me luckily, so that’s a relief.

I decide to take a seat at a table with only a few people. It’s also close to the entrance door, so Izuku will be able to spot me easily when he gets here. After also placing my bag on the ground, I finally start reading. After what feels like a few minutes, but probably is a lot more, I’m already halfway through the thing.

“Y/n?” a familiar voice whispers. A smile can’t help but grow on my face as I turn my head to find Izuku standing next to me.

“Hi.” I reply. He smiles and kisses me cheek, to which my eyes widen. We’re in public, what is he doing? I quickly cover my face with the manga I was reading earlier, so people don’t see my embarrassed expression. Izuku only giggles softly.

“Babe, there’s almost nobody here.” he reassures me. “and I missed you.” he adds with a small pout. Ugh, I can’t be mad at him when he makes that adorable face.

“O-okay.” I close the manga and get up. “I’ll just put this back, and then we can start studying.” he follows me to the shelf.

“So, how was your day?” I ask as my eyes scan for the right manga series. Izuku starts telling me about his day, making me almost laugh a few times when he mentions some silly moments, like Sero and Kaminari trying to prank Bakugou but only failing and angering him as a result.

“Oh, and we will get to work with the other departments of the school for some projects, I’m really excited about that.” I smile. Yeah, that sounds fun.

“What is it for?”

“Well,” I accidentally bump into the bookshelf behind me and yelp quietly. “Mr Aiza-Y/n careful!” I squeeze my eyes closed, preparing for anything falling on top of me, but I feel nothing. My eyes open again and I look up. Izuku is holding some books that would’ve landed on me if he wasn’t here. His expression shows that he was a little scared, but soon relief takes over.

“I thought something was going to happen to you..” he sighed as he placed the books back on the shelf. I awkwardly stand up straight and fiddle with my fingers, mumbling a soft apology. Of course I had to be stupid and not take in my surroundings

“Hey, it’s okay.” he grabs my hands and smiles. “I’m not upset, I’m just glad you’re alright. Just be a little more careful next time, okay, honey?” I nod, trying to hide how flustered the nickname makes me feel and squeeze his hands softly. I look at his hands, and rub my thumbs over them. There are a few new bruises on there.

“Did you get hurt again?” I ask, examining his knuckles. Izuku chuckles awkwardly.

“I-It’s nothing, don’t worry about it. I already went to Recovery Girl for it.” he lets go of one of my hands and wraps an arm around my shoulders.

“I-Izuku, there’s people here…” I say hurriedly, hoping that nobody will see us. I’m not embarrassed by him, of course not. It’s just that I always feel a bit nervous when it comes to PDA.

“I have an idea. How about we study in my dorm room? Can I have cuddles then?” he asks sweetly while removing his hands from me. I nod softly.

“That sounds nice..”

“Okay, let’s get some of your favourite snacks first and then go.” my face lights up and I nod again.

“Let’s go.” I hear him giggle before we both leave the library.

“Oh, we can also get dinner together somewhere if you want, I’m sure there’s food in the kitchen or we can get take-”

“Izuku.” I stop him. “L-let’s get those snacks and study first.” he chuckles and nods.

“Yeah, sorry, I’m just really happy we get to hang out again. Let’s go then, the grocery store is only a few minutes away from UA.”

[androgynousblackbox]

Those "I'm not saying you have to be constantly nurturing and parental towards other ppl's kids, I'm just saying you have to actively engage with them all the time and be basically their unofficial caretaker!" ppl won't even consider some of us didn't really know how to interact with kids even when we WERE kids, huh? Like, I had a p nice happy childhood, but I was that introverted kid who didn't talk much and was stuck between older siblings with a kind big age gap and much younger cousins, so.

I am convinced that some people who like children legitimately cannot write or read for shit. I don’t even disagree that children are people who deserve basic human decency, but that is not what those post are arguing for when they HAVE to add bullshit like “and to be honest, playing with kids and hanging out with them is not THAT difficult in the first place, you are kind of a shit person if you can’t be bothered to do even that” (and yes, OP WAS calling people shit on other replies, I am not exaggerating anything). If you want to say “don’t be a piece of shit to children” then just fucking say that, no person worth a fuck is going to say otherwise, but don’t act as if others are the ones misunderstanding when they point out the shitty guilt tripping you are obviously doing and you are part of the reason why people vent on the internet about how much they dislike children. They claim to understand where people who have been shamed all their lives to be nurturing and maternal are coming from, and then engage on that exact same kind of behaviour that encourages that mentality. Make it make sense. Like, yeah, some people just aren’t good at socializing with younger people, some people are legitimately concerned and prefer to distance themselves to risk not even saying the wrong thing around children, some people do have trauma associated with children (cute of that post to just fucking side eye that, shows how much compassion they have), some people literally don’t have the spoons to handle children on any capacity, all of that is perfectly valid and nobody is a monster or an abuser for that, but ALSO you don’t need to come out with any reason to not want to do something you don’t want to do and won’t cause any harm to anyone for not doing. If someone is demanding one anyway or uses emotional manipulation to make you feel like shit for not fucking playing minecraft with a kid, then fuck them, they are not worth listening. What bothers me the most is that there are people out there who are legitimately hateful towards children, like think “this orphan 6 years old is a fucking monster for having perfectly human reactions to trauma and bullying” or “it’s good to hit children until they are bleeding when they disrespect me, actually” or “children are too young to have any identity that isn’t cishet” levels of maliciousness, but those kind of posts never points to them. They point at 18+ accounts complaining that they are tired of children wanting to interact with them or someone venting they heard a baby cry for hours in a plane to the point they had a migraine because of it or simply saying “me? yeah, no, I don’t really like being around children” as their examples of hate children posting and it’s so fucking bizarre.

[amwritingmeta]

15x19: A First Ending

This was a good episode! Oh, I know, I know - we didn’t get Cas back. But oh, boy, that should mean that Misha shot for five of eight days for 15x20 and that makes me want to rub my hands together with the hope of what that might mean. All the good things!

Oh, don’t hang your hopes on mine btw. I had very high hopes that we’d get Cas back, or very strongly established as coming back (as per 13x04) with a final scene of him waking up in the Empty or something like it, and that didn’t happen, but omg I’m so glad they didn’t.

When Jack started praying and reaching out to Cas my heart almost stopped. 

If Dean doesn’t instigate Cas’ return, then oh it would take away too much!

But then Jack’s moment didn’t lead to anything, and now, the more I think about it, there more it feels like a plant. A reminder of how he prayed to Cas the last time, and woke him. We shall see, eh?

And then we got Dean telling Chuck to bring Cas back, which was a pivotal plant as well. I’d been worried if they hadn’t mentioned Cas more than once, with Dean telling Jack and Sam that Cas sacrificed himself to save him, yeah? 

If there had been no more Cas for the entire episode then, narratively speaking, I would have started wondering what role Cas might actually play in 15x20.

But Cas was mentioned more than once. We even got to hear his voice and have that fake return to stir our... I almost wrote loins, but that’s not appropriate so let’s change it to stir our... martinis. 

Ah yes. We could all use a drink, I’m sure.

The dog as well! Dean was so happy and he carried the dog and petted the dog and put it in Cas’ spot in the backseat and was all, yes, emotional substitute! And then... poof. Because it’s not going to be that easy to replace Cas. *fingers crossed*

Here’s mostly why I’m hopeful for something quite different as the actual finale of the show, the proper wrapping up of these character journeys:

This first ending is for those who have followed the show explicitly to watch these two brothers. (yes there’s a word for them but let’s not)

It ends exactly how these viewers -- and quite possibly the writers who wrote it -- always saw the show ending. It gives an emotionally satisfying wrapping up of all the thematic threads of the show and gives the brothers their hard-won freedom, and keeps the brothers riding in Baby, together, indefinitely. 

And these viewers and fans will always be able to stop watching the show there and keep that as their perfect ending.

Except it’s not the ending-ending. Is it?

This episode neatly and gorgeously wrapped up the Michael/Lucifer/Chuck storyline. It wiped the slate completely clean. Especially with Michael killing Lucifer and Chuck killing Michael. These characters just completely annihilating  each other because they’ve all served their purpose.

And Chuck being drained of his powers and ending up ignored, never to be worshipped again, or even remembered, is such a fitting ending for him! And with Dean refusing to kill him, leaving him to his fate, I’d call that Dean integrating his Shadow.

No more fearing it. It’s powerless. Thanks to Jack (Dean’s inner child) who now holds all the power in the universe.

I’d say Dean Winchester has reached a point of internal balance.

And for all of these good things: Chuck powerless, Jack the New God, surely helping to fix what Cas broke by restoring Heaven (I’m assuming Heaven will be repopulated or that God’s grace will level it out) and Jack stepping into shoes that Cas once tried to fill and failed to, to the detriment to so many of his kin, is simply stunning.

I cried, properly, at Jack’s speech. It was beautiful.

But for all these good things and wrappings up of stuff, didn’t the ending feel kind of superficial? Like stuff was missing in those final five minutes or so? Like... I don’t know... Sam mentioning Eileen maybe? Because surely she was brought back along with everyone else, and one episode ago he was losing his mind over the loss of her.

And they didn’t even mention Cas. Jack mentioned Castiel as a good influence, but Cas was just bunched in with “everyone we’ve lost along the way”.

Meh.

Hey, it’s fine if all you care about is Dean and Sam and you think that they’re at their happiest when they get to drive along a road in Baby, listening to tunes and play-fighting and reminiscing about all those people that have come and gone, while they know they’ll always remain the same.

I mean, if we hadn’t gotten that montage at the end of this episode (a fucking MONTAGE ppl) I would’ve started thinking that maybe Misha was coming back to shoot flashbacks for 15x20, as we got to see the brothers remembering Cas (like with Mary), taking a walk down memory lane and driving around to well-known locales for a final hurrah.

But we got that fucking montage, ppl.

Leaving me to feel that they probably won’t also spend forty minutes rememberembering those same people. You know?

Also, dull. And Dabb is anything but dull. And Dabb loves pulling on stuff he’s hinted at in the first ep of the season. 

And I remember reacting to Sam being the one to escort the kid and her mother into the, what was it? The high school, right? For safety.

While Dean and Cas had that tense exchange by Baby, where Dean couldn’t not ask if Cas was okay and Cas saying, hopefully, that he was, but Dean remaining stone faced and distant. “Awkward” is what Belphegor called it.

Oh. Please let there be awkwardness in 15x20. I beg on bent knees. Beg, I say!

Anyway.

What is 15x20 going to be about if it isn’t about finally answering the question of what will make the brothers happy?

A balanced universe, of course! But freedom without love... sounds kind of lonely to me. 

So, have they answered the question of What do I want? yet? Is this what they want for themselves? More of the same? This season has hinted that it isn’t. It’s hinted very strongly that it isn’t.

So, I’m holding my breath that Dean’s final confrontation is to do with happiness and daring to want it for himself. Daring to admit to wanting it for himself. Daring to go after it... 

Cas does not belong in the Empty.

And hope that it’s telling how Jack didn’t even think to get Cas out of there and bring him home. God got Lucifer out of the Empty so Jack definitely has the power. 

And Dean didn’t ask him to get Cas out of there, not because he doesn’t still want Cas out, but because it would ruin the first ending for the people who want Cas to stay dead. Yeah? 

It’s kind of beautifully done, to my mind, as a nod and a thank you to the people who have supported one reading of the show. It’ll be difficult for them to go apeshit when Dabb and the writers can simply tell them they don’t have to watch further than 15x19 and be content that they’ve got an ending that lets them cling to the brothers as the begin all, end all.

And yes, I remain believing we will get Dean and Cas together-together before the end of the show. I have no clue how much of a together-together we’ll get, but for the show not to give us a clear understanding of how Dean loves Cas back is unthinkable at this point, and will stay unthinkable until the show tells me otherwise, because nothing but those two together makes even a lick of sense to me.

Dean’s feelings were in the subtext this episode because that’s where they always have been and hopefully fingers crossed because this ending wasn’t for us, it was for other sides of fandom, giving them room for denial, if they simply don’t want to see that what Dean wants is Cas back.

Our ending isn’t happening until next week.

Dean: It’s a helluva time to bail. There’s a lot of people counting on you. People with questions—they’re gonna need answers. Jack: The answers will be in each of them. Maybe not today, but someday.

For me this may be setting up for 15x20.

Dean could be said to be accepting the reality of Cas being gone this episode. He starts off not telling the whole truth about what happened with Cas (of course), he’s drinking himself stupid, he tries to demand of Chuck to bring Cas back, he finds that emotional crutch in the doggo and he moves into acceptance because what else can he do?

Especially if he’s still reeling and is struggling with his fear of happiness, with not feeling deserving, with it being easier to simply let it all go.

But.

Letting go of the need is healthy, allowing it to make way for the real want that is about choosing Cas, not because he feels lost without him, but because Cas completes him...

That would be something. 

(oh shush let’s get with the romance) (Jerry always brings it)

The brothers love each other, but throughout this narrative there’s been hints that they both long for more. So much more. It would be so weird if it didn’t all wrap up with more being wanted and chosen and offered and had.

So if the answers are to be “in each of them -- someday”, then maybe Dean just needs to reach a moment where he’s ready to admit to himself that he can’t stand the fact that Cas died not knowing that Dean loves him back.

I wonder if Sam will push for this admittance... I’d like to witness that conversation, that’s for sure.

And Eileen. I hope she’s back sooner rather than later next episode!!

What’s next episode going to be about if it’s not about the breaking of old patterns to make way for new ones...? Are we going to follow the boys around as they do laundry and cook and make a few tentative plans for their unknown future? They won’t be hunting much in 15x20, at least if Dabb is anything to go by. I guess there might be something brief as a final The Boys With Their Weapons Doing Their Thing, but... it won’t be a case episode. And it would’ve been strange if it was, you know?

So then. Hope. One more week breathing eating sleeping on hopes and wishes and we shall simply have to wait and see what we get.

I have every faith it will blow us away, but I’m also sitting pretty. Reining in those horses lest they run away with me. And whatever comes our way, I’m so grateful for this show!

[personasintro]

you are really bad at taking "constructive criticism" like the other anon said. may be few people actually care for you and are just asking if things are possible. You always post saying "people don't understand you or are demanding you certain things", i guess the other anon just wanted to say that may be you can have a specific day to post your stories like "every alternate friday".. i guess suggesting something like this is no harm right? you doing it or no is upto you but taking every single thing in a negative way is not healthy. I have never seen you take constructive cristicism positively. May be these are just very polite and humble suggestions from them. Think about it 🙂

Tell me one bad thing I said to that anon:

I was speaking generally because a lot of you don’t seem to understand that there is a certain boundary. I’m so done with people always trying to suggest things to me, when I’m obviously not asking for it. I’m always trying to be respectful but either way, you always seem to find something bad about me and for that reason, I just know that no matter what I say or how I react, I’m always gonna be the bad guy and I’m truly sorry for that. But I’m just as human as you are, with my own feelings and I’m sorry, but I can’t control my emotions that I feel when I’m constantly bombarded by different kinds of asks that just do me no good. It’s not my fault. And I feel like a lot of people do it on purpose, trying to push my buttons to see how much I can take.

I’m sorry, but this is my blog and if you constantly have something bad to say to me, I’m not interested. I’m not stupid, I know most of these anons are doing it on purpose and aren’t trying to just “innocently suggest” something. I’m not speaking about that specific ask right now, just in general and what I can see in my inbox. It might seem as if I’m taking things in negative way but I’m sorry again, but after getting a dead threat, hate and unnecessary opinions that are nothing but trying to act as “constructive criticism” is just enough for me. And yet, I’m always trying to be as nice as I can but some people seem to not just get me & whatever I’ve to say. Therefore, that’s why I think all of this is being done purposely to hurt me, if not something else.

I don’t know what I’ve done to deserve to constantly being hated, attacked and other ppl putting words in my mouth, twisting everything I’ve to say. I don’t know what your purpose is… me stopping writing? me deleting my blog? me deleting my works? Just like, be honest or leave me alone. I don’t know what else you want from me.

Think about it :)