#posting this here too because this needs to stop

[theyluvjake]

our little secrets — lhs

© theyluvjake - all rights reserved, no permission to copy or post, this is my only account.

pt1 pt2 pt3 (make sure to read pt1 first if you havent!!)

Synopsis: cam boy heeseung. class president reader. the schools perfect student harbors a dirty secret, a dirty secret thats alot closer to her than she realizes. what happens when their paths cross? will they discover eachothers little secret?

MINORS DNI!

PAIRINGS - camboy!heeseung x innocent!reader

CONTENT - college au, smut & fluff with plot!! series, slow-burn, multiple chapters.

WORDCOUNT - 8k

WARNINGS - smut, this chapter doesn't have any sex (yet), just mutual / guided masturbation. caming, dirty talk, use of pet names (baby, doll, slut), praise & degradation, honestly hand kink. mentions of corruption kink. like last chapter, hee is a bit of a perv. but we like that <3

NOT PROOFREAD!

"ook.. so, what was that all about?" sunghoon sort of spoke underneath his breath. it was silent for a while amongst the group minus some of them taking sips of their drinks.

"she probably just... - had to pee! " sunoo blurtted out to fill the silence, only to make it fall silent again,

"ill go check on her-" yunjin was just about to turn to leave when heeseung stopped her.

"no, i can go check,"

his smile was soft and reassuring. yunjin was slightly taken aback as he volunteered, but her curiosity in whatever was going on with him and his new found interest in you, made her back down, silently agreeing by nodding her head.

maybe it was a bad friend mood sending a guy you didn't really know that well to check on you instead of her, but she just needed to see where it would go... y'know, for the plot.

heeseung swiftly made his way through the crowds of people heading straight to the guest bathroom,

*knocks* "um.. y/n are you okay?" fuck. wait what if its not even her in there?.. –

shit. why is he here?! the sound of his voice instantly sent your mind into a panicked spiral. - umm.. maybe i can just pretend im not in here and he will go away? yea! so you did, and you stayed silent.

"your friends just wanted to make sure you were okay... well and i wanted to talk to you."

he bit his lip, thinking he was probably just making whatever was going on worse. but he couldn't go back to the group without checking on you.

talk?? to me? why? this can't actually be happening right now. – y'know, maybe it's not him? maybe my thoughts are just all clouded... i'm just making up stuff..

— because there's no way. that would just be too insane.

you were full on in denial. it was unfortunately the only thing you realized you could do to get through the night. closing your eyes you took a deep breath before opening the door eyes instantly meeting the boys pretty doe eyed brown ones.

"um, sorry, yea i'm ok! just... had an eyelash in my eye.." you giggled nervously.

"ah, ok ok... i was worried it was something i said.." the corner of his lips tugged upwards as a small rush of relief washed over.

"is.. that what you wanted to talk to me about?"

"yea, well, and i wanted to still offer you that drink" he couldn't help but smirk as he noticed the light flush of pink painting your cheeks.

you paused for a second. "...well, the thing is i just don't really usually drink..."

"yea, and you usually don't go to parties." he chuckled.

he did make a good point. you didn't, so why would you draw the line at your new experiences now. one drink, that's all. it would be fine right?

"that's also true," you smiled, still feeling anxious, but now having a burning curiosity about him. "sure, i'll take one drink"

he nodded satisfied and before you could register anything, his hand moved to your lower back ever so slightly, just to guide the two of you back towards the kitchen.

the simple feeling of his hand just barely grazing, hovering, over your back was sending waves of electricity through your body.

"so, class prez, what are you doing out at a college party tonight?"

"oh.. um, well it was sort of yunjin and sunoo's idea. i wasn't super on board but... i was curious since i'd never been before."

"ah, i see. i was surprised to see you here." he chuckled, "well, i think everyone was" -

you were about to respond when his voice continued on,

"pleasant surprise though," he said ever-so casually.

you gulped down the knot in your throat and tried to steady your racing heartbeat, but thankfully, before you knew it, you reached the kitchen.

you nervously leaned against the counter while he poured the two of you some drinks before he went to pass you the cup. you hadn't yet looked down, hand reaching for the cup, "thank yo-" then you saw it. his hand.

his awfully familiar, perfectly veiny hand, that just so happened to have 2 identical silver rings on the exact fingers gamer.lhee also frequently had ones on.

you couldn't even finish your sentence before you mumbled something along the lines of 'you had to go', before embarrassingly turning around and completely sprinting away from him.

not long after your disappearing act with heeseung you stayed on the other side of the house, hidden behind yunjin and sunoo, before you managed to make a good enough excuse to leave.

—

after you had gotten home that night, you refused to even look at his page. although that was all your mind wanted to do, to end the burning question and just try and confirm or not confirm that it was him. but you couldn't. not when it felt so possible. not when you knew you had to be in class with him tomorrow.

you attempted to get as good of a night's rest as you could. but it wasn't much, not when you basically got home at 1 am, and weren't able to shut your brain off until around 3 before you could sleep. leaving you with approximately only 5 hours of sleep the next day.

in the morning, you got ready for class, your usual almost uniform-like attire. you just prayed you'd be able to make it through the day without anyone asking about you at the party last night. and above all, not running into heeseung.

you were so embarrassed, you honestly had no clue what you would be able to say to him. it's not like the two of you interacted much, anyways. so why would it be different? yea! it will be fine!

besides before the conversation you two had at the party, you weren't even aware you shared the same literature and physics class, meaning he probably typically sat far across the room from the spot you always sat in. so in theory, all you had to do was try and focus and not think about whether you could feel his eyes lingering on you or not.

however you did not plan for what you saw when you walked into your literature class. lee heeseung, already there, sitting in your chair. sure, there wasn't technically, 'assigned seats' but everyone in the class knew, you sat in that spot every single class.

karma. you weren't sure what for, but this had to be some kind of cruel form of karma. you stood in the doorway for a little too long, to where students now had to nudge past you to get inside the classroom. you were just trying to think of any possible way out of this interaction. but you couldn't avoid him forever. you took a deep breath, fully aware your cheeks had definitely started to turn pink, before walking over to your seat.

heeseung instantly looked up at you with a smirk painting his face, "what? i just figured I'd see how the class president's view of the classroom looks." he shrugged.

"well... now that you've tested it out, could i possibly have my seat back?"

"i don't know... now that i've tried it out, i realized how nice the view is... plus, i'm not doing that great in this class, i think maybe sitting closer will help me with my notes~"

"but-"

"well the seat right next to me is open, you should sit there. you don't mind if i just have yours for the day, right?"

he still wore the same playful smirk on his face, only leading to your face heating up more by the second. you briefly took a look around, at the room, and then the clock. noticing how it was only a couple minutes until the class was starting, and pretty much every empty seat had already filled except for the one next to heeseung.

you sighed and set your books down on the desk, and reluctantly took a seat next to him. before you could even appreciate the shared silence between you two for not even a minute,

"y'know, i didn't really expect you to be the type to ghost a guy mid-sentence."

you gulped and tried to come up with some better excuse but you had nothing.

"yea... um i'm really sorry about that, i don't usually do that or anything.."

he raised his eyebrows curious as to the actual reason to why you ran off, but he didn't push further, instead he chose to use it to tease you.

he chuckled lightly, "don't worry about it, you looked cute running away from me"

he said so matter-of-factly that your jaw almost dropped before you heard the professor speaking, causing the class to finally silence.

"ok class, everyone phones away"

the rest of class, you could barely focus. which was completely unlike you. you couldn't stop thinking about the words.. "pretty", "cute" replaying on loop in your head. as much as you wanted to just pay attention, you couldn't, not when he was only a couple feet away from you.

he easily took note of it too. subtly glancing over at your dazed, flustered expression throughout the entire class.

thankfully, the rest of the class no other words were exchanged. no more teasing or flirty remarks, you finally felt a bit of relief like that was the worst of what would come out of today. but heeseung, he had other plans, he was just starting. this was only your first of three shared classes of the day and his main goal was just to get your attention in every single one.

your next class, you got a break. and then it was on to the two last classes of the day, both of which you shared. economics, and physics.

when you got to your economics class, you took a look around, noticing he wasn't there yet. you quickly took your seat in your usual spot before yunjin joined on your left side.

"ugh, i am so tired," she whined to you,

"tell me about it..." you muttered underneath your breath. the class slowly filled as you chatted with your best friend for the remaining time before the class started. getting so distracted you forgot about heeseung. it wasn't until a little while into class, you heard a familiar voice whispering in your ear. your eyes went wide.

"hey, what page were we on again?"

heeseung. you had been so distracted you failed to even notice heeseung had came in and sat directly behind you.

you carefully turned your head just a little before realizing how close his face was to yours. "um-.. it's 32" you quickly whispered directing your attention back to the front of the room.

"thanks, pretty" he winked before leaning back into his own chair, smiling satisfied.

the heat instantly rose to your face upon hearing the familiar nickname again. the same one that ignited a visceral reaction within you that night at the party, due to the familiarity of the tone, the voice.

the remainder of the class, he continued making up excuses to teasingly lean over, whispering into your ear and your best friend was nothing short of intrigued.

as soon as the professor turned away from the class his lips were practically pressed up against your ear and you felt like you were going insane.

"hey, i missed that part, could i take a quick look at your notes?" he hummed quietly, face so close to yours you could feel his hot breath fanning your ear.

"s-sure, just.. quick" you muttered quietly afraid of being caught speaking while your professor was still mid-lecture.

you carefully passed your notebook over your shoulder, his hands taking it from yours, purposely brushing his fingers over yours in the process. - anxiously tapping the floor with your foot, waiting for him to give it back to you.

"are you almost done?" you slightly leaned to the side, whispering, as the professor had turned around and continued speaking, and you were anxious to have your notebook returned.

"yea, you want it back?" the boy smirked, not that you could see, but you could feel it through the smugness in his voice.

"say please~."

he cannot be serious. "what..?"

"just say please"

you sighed, ignoring the hammering of your heart against your chest.

"please?" you whispered, looking straight forward. but it was more than enough. right as the professor turned away for a brief second, he leaned over enough to place your notebook back onto your desk.

looking down, you quickly made yourself busy, continuing to take notes and try to stuff down all the emotions flowing through your body. that's when you noticed a tiny note written in the corner of your paper.

you look cute when you're blushing. ;)

and just like that you were sure your face was now completely red.

"hey are you okay?" yunjin leaned over noticing how red you were.

"yeah, i'm just hot.. it's a little hot in here" you muttered before removing your sweater.

thankfully the class was nearing the end, finally. as soon as the class was dismissed you quickly packed up your bag and grabbed yunjin's hand rushing the both of you out of the classroom.

"so... what the hell was heeseung doing all up in your space the whole class??"

"i don't know!"

"oh my god, that's why your face was red! you were blushing! do you have a crush on him?? since when?!"

"shut up!" you whispered trying to keep her from practically yelling about this in the hallway. "no! i don't, so since never."

"okayy well can't say the same for him..~" she giggled and you hit her arm.

"shut up. you're imagining stuff." you huffed before the both of you made it into your physics classroom.

this time you were determined to make sure he couldn't sit near you. quickly hopping into the seat next to jake and instructing yunjin to sit on your other side, before you also waved sunoo over, who had just come walking in the door to sit behind you. a sigh of relief left your mouth, seeing how all the seats in your close proximity had already been filled.

you hadn't even noticed heeseung walking in, and taking the seat across from yunjin.

"hey y/n!" jake smiled at you and your gaze lifted greeting him back with a friendly smile.

"hey jake!" - "how was the party last night? everyone was surprised to see you there, did you have fun?"

"oh yea, it was fun.. i guess, - not exactly my thing though." you chuckled quietly before continuing your friendly chit-chat with jake before the class eventually came to a start.

jake was easy to talk to. you two weren't exactly close, but closer than you and heeseung. jake was really good at physics. everyone knew that, so there were a few times he helped you out by offering a few quick study sessions after school at the library. so naturally the two of you did talk when it came to this class.

thankfully, the rest of this class went by smoothly. it was just about nearing the end before the professor announced you would be doing a partner assignment.

"so, pick someone to pair up with. this will be due next week, so please make sure to schedule some time outside of class to work on this with your partner. once you have chosen, before you leave today, just come write down your partnership!"

before you could think,

"hey, do you wanna be partners?" jake smiled, turning to you. and you almost sighed in relief. though yunjin, who had also turned to you, rolled her eyes.

"sure! honestly, i could use some extra help with this unit.. " you smiled to him before the two of you walked to the front of the class to write your names down.

none of which went un-noticed by heeseung. practically burning holes into his friends back. before he could stare any longer he got a backup plan in mind, turning to your best friend just before she had turned to sunoo. "hey, yunjin, do you wanna be partners?"

she was caught off guard at first but then she put 2 and 2 together figuring this was some effort to still get close to you. "sure" she smiled and sunoo rolled his eyes dramatically.

"ugh, i hate you both, you are both the worst." he pouted before turning to sunghoon, "sunghoon, do you have a partner?"

the boy pushed up his glasses before looking up "uh, no?"

"ok, now you do, come on," he said giving him almost no room to even argue before they both walked up to the front together as well.

after all of you had written down your partnerships you all exited the lecture hall agreeing to go to the library so you guys could plan what days you needed to get together to work on the assignment.

"y'know, why don't we all just get together at our house and we can all work together? heeseung was quick to suggest as soon as you all sat down.

"don't the three of you also share a dorm already?" he asked pointing to you yunjin and sunoo to which you all nodded.

"so, since jake, sunghoon, and i share a place and ours is bigger than a dorm, we should all just meet up together there." all of you looked around to see what everyone thought, and it was quickly agreed upon that that was a good idea.

not that you agreed necessarily, but you were quickly outnumbered, on top of that yunjin's enthusiasm was utterly confusing. you all agreed to meet up on friday to work on the assignment. all of you exchanging numbers before going on your separate ways.

—

the next few days rolled around and heeseung seemed to have let down on his teasing for a little bit, and thank god. because you were already stressed about friday the rest of the week. then, thursday came around. your phone dinged as you lay in your bed rolling around on your phone, seeing the notification pop up,

gamer.lhee is live now!

you hadn't even been on his page since the party last sunday. but you couldn't even deny how much you missed it without more time to think, you joined the stream.

you sat up feeling the heat rising to your face, he was fully clothed, the angle just showing his lap and his hands fidgeting with his rings while he chatted with those on the stream.

blushy.baby has entered the chat

"hi blushy.baby, welcome in~" he chuckled to himself, reading the username. oddly or maybe not, it reminded him of you. "cute username, reminded me of someone,"

who??

maybe he has a girlfriend?

maybe a crush?

the comments started rolling in, causing him to chuckle a bit more. "no, i don't have a girlfriend," he clarified, but carefully neglected the ones regarding if he had a crush or not. causing you to try and swallow the lump in your throat. intently watching between the screen and the chat room.

"blushy baby, joins but never talks~ is it because you're shy and blushy~?"

you felt the air get caught in your throat, hearing him single out your username. making your head spin, could he... know? fuck. no! i mean, it's probably not even lee heeseung. like you said, there's no way.

"it's okay, it's cute, i have a thing for cute shy girls." he hummed

blushy.baby: really?

"yes, something about.. about them, i don't know,.. maybe i have a corruption kink." he chuckled darkly before trailing off again ", proud of you for finally commenting something, baby. keep it up, yeah?"

and just like that you carefully squeezed your thighs together. fuck. it wasn't until now, when the comments were so direct, so personal, that you realized how much you loved hearing praises from him. if there was any way to keep you commenting, this was it.

blushy.baby: i will if you keep talking to me like that...

"oh yea?, you like being praised baby, hm? "

"- i was wondering what i should do for today's stream... maybe we can do some praising. maybe some guided masturbation? what do you pretty dolls think?"

the chat instantly sped up with enthusiasm and he chuckled at the eagerness.

"you're gonna be good for me, right?" he hummed his hand lightly grazing over his crotch area where you should start to see the outline of his boner growing.

"alright, now be a good girl for me and take off your pants first hm? dont worry ill follow along." he said as he carefully lifted his hips up in his chair before pulling down his pants leaving him in just his boxer briefs.

like you were put under some sort of trance, you set your phone down against your pillow before lifting your own hips and pulling down your pajama shorts leaving you in just your underwear.

"thats it, just like that," he hummed satisfied, and it almost felt like he could see you. like it was just you and him.

"okay, now leave your panties on, just touch outside for me, hm? just like this" his hand slowly started to stroke the outline of his hardened cock through the strained fabric of his boxers.

and you did the same, slipping your hand down cupping yourself, feeling the moistened material of your underwear clinging to your skin already. letting out a small helpless mutter.

"you're already wet for me arent you? dirty slut."

the sudden use of such degrading words, mixed with his still soft tone, and praises l make your hips shudder. you liked that too... really liked it.

"its ok though, b',cus you're my pretty little slut~, aren't you?" he cooed before letting a small deep chuckle breathe past his lips. he continued, painstakingly slowly stroking himself, the wet patch from his pre-cum leaking out now evident, only soaking you more as you stared at the screen and continued to palm yourself.

"ok lets get rid of these now too, they are in the way." he lifted his hips again just enough to slowly pull down his boxers simultaneously also pulling his shirt over his head. letting his big, stiff and hardened cock hit his stomach as it sprang out.

"look what you do to me.." he grabbed himself in his hand making sure the camera got a good angle of his angry red tip, leaking of pre-cum. "wish i could see what i do to you..." he hummed slowly starting to stroke himself.

on the other side of the screen you were practically drooling just at the sight. your hips needily rutting against your hand. before you too removed the last remaining of your clothes.

"go on, touch yourself." his voice was low and demanding. and it didn't take long for your fingers to slowly start circling your clit.

"mm, thats it baby" he hummed. "now, i want you to imagine its my fingers ok? not yours, mine touching you."

you gulped and closed your eyes doing just as he said and the second you let your imagination roam the better it felt. imagining what his large hands, long fingers would feel like all over you. having the precision that you lacked deeply.

"good girl." - "faster."

at this point, you could barely suppress the whines leaving your mouth, but fearing your roommates would hear you, you turned your head to the side muffling the sounds into the pillow as best you could.

"fuck, i wish i was inside you right now. wanna fuck your tight little cunt." he moaned lowly. and little did you know, the entire time he was thinking about you. about fucking you.

the dirtiness of the words made your brain start to feel weird and fuzzy. your pussy fluttered clenching helplessly around nothing. not even your fingers because still, you had yet to venture into doing anything other than stimulating your clit.

"fuck. im gonna cum. you wanna cum for me, hm baby?" his hand sped up the squelching sounds from the way he was fucking himself into his hand were pounding in your earbuds.

you mindlessly nodded your head as if he could see you, feeling the knot in your stomach building, you were so close.

"lets cum together, yeah? i wanna cum inside you." the sheer thought of that alone sent you flying over the edge the second the words left his lips.

and just like that he started to reach his high as well. imagining what it would feel like to stuff you full. "oh fuck, yes, im coming.." his moans got louder and you continued to rub messy circles on your clit as you rode out your high, your legs and hips shaking and squirming beneath your own touch.

your eyes fluttered open as you slowly started coming down from your immense high. seeing the lewd image on the screen, hee's hand still wrapped around his cock, messy, with cum dripping down everywhere.

"good girl, you did so good for me, pretty." he hummed sweetly. and in that moment you heard it again. not gamer.lhee, lee heeseung. 'pretty'.

it was him.

the sound rang in your ears all you could think about was what it would actually be like to actually be on the receiving end of those words. not through a screen. not to the thousands of others watching him. but to you and only you.

not long after that, the stream ended. leaving you with a world-wind of emotions. but it was already so late. you didn't have time or honestly even the capacity in your brain after all of that to think. you carefully cleaned yourself up before getting back into your bed and passing out almost immediately from exhaustion.

how the fuck. where you going to face him tomorrow.

—

the next morning when you finally woke up, you felt so nervous about the day that you felt physically sick. after the stream last night, it only strengthened your theory on whether or not gamer.lhee was lee heeseung.

you were almost sure of it. and there was no way you could face him today. but yet, you had to.

situation being what it is, you devised a plan, well. kinda. the plan basically entailed ignoring heeseungs presence at all costs. just focus on the project and jake. easy enough, right?

after the day of classes went by, you and your two best friends returned to your shared dorm to get ready before heading over to the boy's house.

"ok, what should we wear?" yunjin spoke almost excitedly as if you were going out to hang out with friends, not work on some boring assignment.

"um... i was gonna wear sweats? what is that not appropriate study attire?" you asked as you walked together through the dorm,

"no that's perfectly appropriate! that's what i was gonna wear too!" sunoo was quick to reassure you only to receive an elbow in the side from yunjin. "OW! what was that-" he rolled his eyes and clutched his side dramatically while giving him a face before continuing with you.

"like sweatshirt and sweatpants?"

"yes?"

"no."

"no?"

"no. how about sweats and a cropped baby tee? still cute but comfy!"

"what is up with you?? why do you care what i wear to work on a school project??" you quickly nipped back at her, unlike your usual demnor, but you were getting slightly irritated, confused as to what the reason for all of this was.

"ok seriously? y/n. heeseung has literally been flirting with you ever since the party, are you that clueless?? i saw all of it in class. plus pretty much all of his friends were eating you with their stares as well. and well, they are all hot. this is your chance!!"

"my chance for what exactly?" you questioned noticing the sudden warmth that had risen to your cheeks. quickly turning away as both of them followed into your room.

"like i don't know, a boyfriend, a sex friend? so many possibilities.." she giggled but not in the way that she was joking, in the way that she was completely and utterly serious. "and that means you admit it right? he was flirting with you!"

"you're crazy. and i don't know! ok! i don't know what's going on with him lately, he's being weird." you obviously were trying to deflect because you obviously couldn't believe let alone admit any of this yet.

"just trust me ok, ill be the best wing-woman, just let me help." she pleaded.

"no, not tonight i need to focus, i need to get a good grade on this project."

yunjin sighed dramatically. "ugh. fine, but you are wearing what i said. i won't interject anything, but the outfit I'm just gonna test a theory ok?"

"whatever.." you finally gave in, just hoping it would make her shut up, and it did. for now at least.

the three of you all got ready which didn't entail all that much since you were already coming from class. you changed into a pair of low-rise baggy grey sweats that pooled at your ankles and paired it with a basic white baby tee that was practically skin tight, just slightly cropped showing the tiniest bit of your stomach. leaving your hair down you fixed your already practically perfect curls, before touching up your flawless makeup.

"you guys ready?" you walked out into the living room finding sunoo, yunjin not far behind.

"yup!"

by the time you guys arrived at the boy's shared house, it was around 4:30pm. yunjin carefully knocked on the door and you anxiously shifted on your feet fidgeting with your school bag before the door was answered. it was jake. you sighed a little in relief.

"hey guys! come on in!" the fluffy-haired boy smiled and the three of you entered into the shared home.

"the guys are in the living room, it's pretty big so we figured we could all just work in there or if it's too loud we can split up around the house, i don't know whatever you guys think works we are cool with!"

jake smiled before leading you all to the living room, not before he got a nice look at you though. he hadn't really taken the time to notice how pretty you were. not until the party when everyone saw you outside of your school persona. but seeing you in his house, in daylight, in casual clothes you looked adorable.

once you reached the living room everyone started to greet each other slowly taking seats around. but as soon as you stepped foot in there you could feel a particularly heavy gaze set on you. heeseung.

you didn't even look at him but you knew it was him. and it was. he didn't even hold back the small lip bite as his eyes drank in your figure from top to bottom only to be brought back to reality when your best friend stepped in front of him.

there was a few other figures lingering around as well. it was jay and jungwon. i guess they didn't need a reason, this is their house but it felt a little strange before the two of them talked. just chatting and letting everyone know they were around if anyone needed help finding anything or food. it was clear though to most that they were just curious, as to what was going on, and more so who was in their house right now.

after everyone got sort of settled in different areas of the room, you and jake took a spot in the corner with some pillows on the floor and spread out your notes and textbooks. "so, did you look over any of the requirements yet?" jake spoke softly,

"oh, uh, no... not yet sorry.." your tone was quickly guilt-ridden and worried before jake was quick to reassure you.

"no, no problem at all, i already did so you didn't have to." he smiled, getting out the instructions given by your professor. "ill just give you a small run-down, and then we can work together on the rest, sound good?" you nodded.

"oh and let me know if im going too fast or you don't understand something, not that you won't... you are like the top student of the school. but just in case y'know,... i know physics isn't your favorite, so honestly, i don't mind doing most of the work!" he smiled reassuringly and for some reason it almost made you blush. you weren't sure exactly why, maybe because you two were finally in such close proximity alone together.

either way, what you hadn't noticed was how heeseung noticed. everything. his jaw was clenched starting holes into jake and you before yunjin brought him back to reality.

"ok, heeseung, could you stop eye-fucking y/n for at least like 5 seconds?"

"what?" heeseung looked back at her barely even acknowledging what she said.

"i agreed to be your partner, god knows why because i know you actually suck at this class, so come on please lets just get something done."

"oh yea... sure, sorry.." he sighed and redirected his focus to the papers infront of him.

about and hour and a half went by and everyone kept to themselves, or moreso, their partnerships. trying to get as much done as possible, before inevitably needing some sort of break.

"my brain hurts..." you whined slightly rubbing your temples. earning a small chuckle from jake.

"we make a pretty good team though, huh? look were almost done in one day!" he gestured down at your work proudly and heeseung overheard the whole thing, getting irritated he walked over to the two of you.

"hey y/n you okay?" your heart dropped hearing the framilar voice, slowly looking up to meet his face.

"oh yea... im fine" you muttered and jake looked up confused as well at the boys sudden approach.

"i just saw you rubbing your head, does it hurt? i have some tylenol if you need some,"

"oh shit, does it? i thought you were just joking around, let me go get some-" jake quickly went to stand up,

"no no!! im fine seriously, i think i just need some water and a snack or something, thats all!"

"say less," jake smiled getting up before offering his hand to help you off the ground aswell, earning a heavy eyeroll from heeseung.

"come on ill show you where we keep the best snacks" he smiled and gently brushed his hand across your lower back guiding you to the kitchen with him. a framilar feeling from when heeseung did the same exact thing to you at the party.

which heeseung instantly noticed and pissed him off even further.

"snacks? hell yea fuck this " sunghoon instantly stood up and so did the others everyone gravitating towards the kitchen for a small snack break.

heeseung followed closely behind the two of you, before he stopped biting his tongue, and decided he had enough of jakes hands on you.

heeseung swiftly came up behind jake,

"hey sim, pretty sure this project doesnt require such a hands-on approach." he glared before turning his direction towards you. jake just looked at his friend confused at the sudden passive aggressive comment.

"you good? you don't need jake to babysit you, right?" heeseung stepped between the two of you creating enough space between the two of you for his comfort. grabbing you a bottle of water from the fridge. "here, and let me know if your head gets worse and you need the tylenol, hm?"

heeseungs sudden attentiveness had your heart racing and your stomach fluttering. and the tension between him and jake was palpable now. you tried to make sure to maintain your composure (you weren't.)

because when you reached out to take the water bottle from his hand you instantly had flashbacks to last night. that hand, his hand, his voice, him. you nearly dropped it when the boy caught it and handed it to you again "careful there pretty, you sure you're okay? –" he leaned in subtly enough to where it wouldn't look suspicious. "or do i just make you nervous" he smirked quickly pulling back before casually taking a seat.

the others were all already sitting around the kitchen table, snacks in hand chatting and eating. You took a seat in the only empty chair, almost as if it was intentional, the only seat open was between both jake and heeseung. You reluctantly sat down anxiously sipping on your water, almost completely silent as the rest of the group chatted among themselves.

"wait, guys i have an idea.." yunjin suddenly speaks up and the misciclanious chatter quiets. "lets play a game... y'know, as a break while were here, - how about truth or dare?"

everyone looks around but it doesnt take but a couple seconds for everyone to agree. partially because all of you were so bored, but mostly because it gave everyone an excuse to procrastinate for a little while longer.

"i'm down" jake and sunghoon immediately responded in which heeseung followed.

"can we play too?" jay and jungwon walked up hearing the commotion from the kitchen.

"the more the merrier!" sunoo clapped his hands excitedly and you almost let your whole head fall on the counter hoping it would hit hard enough to knock you out.

"who wants to go first?"

"ill go!" jungwon quickly volunteered

"ok, truth or dare jungwon?" yunjin asks sitting up on her elbows.

"truth"

"If you had to survive the zombie apocalypse with one person in this room, who would it be?"

jungwon sighed as he looked around thinking deeply about his answer.

"shit... i dont know i feel like im probably fucked with all of you to be honest but, maybe jay or jake? I know jay can fight, and well jake is studying in healthcare so he could probably help keep me alive.."

"yess sirr!" jake chuckled and posed proudly while jay laughed, nodding.

"ok sure, but don't make it seem like i just go around beating people up won..."

the rest of the group went back and forth between some light hearted and casual truths + dares. heeseung, casually pulled out his phone, opening his twitter and deciding to tweet an update to his account as he frequently would. but it was weird,

at the exact same time he tweeted, your phone which was upside-down next to your arm buzzed. weird.

i mean obviously everyone gets notifications, he shouldn't have thought that much of it, but the timing was so perfect. he decided to send another one, and surely enough, your phone buzzed again. his eyebrows immedialty raised. no fucking way.

gamer.lhee: ??

he tweeted a third time, just a random series of question marks and right on time, your phone buzzed, a third and fourth time. and there you were, completely oblivious as to what was happening. too busy listening to the others playing the game to even notice your phone buzzing on the table.

he really had no way to prove it but he had to try. and the fact you were all playing truth or dare made it even easier. he quickly set his phone down and re-focused his attention to the rest of the group.

"ok, heeseung, you haven't gone yet, truth or dare" yunjin smirks and you can only pray to god she doesn't say anything stupid, but you know her.

"truth"

"who in this room would you trust the most with a secret?"

perfect.

"y/n." heeseung quickly and casually responds, to which his best friend gasp offenedly.

"dude are you serious, in a room full of your best friends??" jake scofs

heeseung shrugs, "i don't know, something just tells me that y/n is really good at keeping secrets."

you immediately turned your head, feeling your heartbeat quicken, so fast that it had you debating if you would go into cardiac arrest. why... how.. why would he,,.. why would he say that??? he can't know. how would he know.

you just looked up at him flustered and confused and he just shrugged again keeping the same smug smirk on his face. "am i wrong?" he asked but this time quiet and directed at you.

"ok my turn to ask!" sunoo shouted excitedly, seeing that the questions and dares were starting to pick up in the heat.

"y/n, truth or dare?"

your eyes widened like a warning towards sunoo instantly. what best friends they are. you were practically begging him with your look to go easy on you but you knew he wasn't.

you rubbed your temples trying to gauge which choice would be less lethal. truth, right?

"truth, i guess.."

"ok, when was the last time you thought about kissing someone..." he pauses briefly before finishing the question, "- in this room?"

your face said everything.

"oh?" sunghoon raised his eyebrows curiously as pretty much everyone in the room, except for 3 people seemed surprised. yunjin, sunoo, and heeseung. who wore a smug smirk on his face.

"oh? so, recently then?" sunoo teases further only causing your face to redden even more.

jake quickly also turned his attention to you, although he didn't want to make you even more embarrassed, so he said nothing. just sat in silence wondering who it could be. feeling a slight twinge of jealousy.

"n-no.." your voice quickly betrayed you as your words stumbled out in a stutter. "i don't, i mean, - i haven't thought about,.. kissing, anyone! , ever!"

"you are literally such a bad lair." yunjin scofs

jake quickly noticed how red your face was, and whilst heeseung was relishing in your flustered state, jake quickly took it into his hands to help his partner out of the situation.

"ok my turn, no one has asked me yet!" jake says to the group eyes starting to re-direct to the boys.

"ok, truth or dare jake" jay quickly replies

"dare"

"do your best impression of one of us"

jake carefully looks around before his eyes locked on his target for a second. jake proceeds to sassily cross his arms and roll his eyes hard, before giving jay a nasty side eye. collectively everyone started laughing

"sunoo." the group almost said in unison, as they continued laughing at jakes sassy impression of sunoo.

"hey!" sunoo snapped back but he couldn't even argue as it was completely accurate.

"ok, seriously though this was fun, we should get back to working now though," jake says while others boo and sigh

"hey i never said we couldn't continue this another time?" the rest of the group agreed and everyone went back into their spots in the living room.

everyone slowly got back into working on their projects and jake could tell your mind was elsewhere, so he without asking took on most of the work finishing up the project.

"hey y/n? can i ask you something?"

you turned quickly meeting the boys gaze,

"sure, what is it?" he paused for a minute before he asked you quietly, wanting to make sure no one overheard.

"is there something going on between you and heeseung?"

you eyes widened taken aback by jakes question,

"no, why..?" you quickly responded

"oh, i dont know, it just kinda seems like theres something going on between the two of you lately..."

"theres not! well.." you paused as you thought back to the night of the party. maybe he already told the guys what happened?

"well?"

"did he ever tell any of you what happened at the party?"

jake raised his eyebrows and shook his head, "no, did something happen between you two at the party?"

"no! well sorta... i just, he offered me a drink and i said yes and then i sorta.... ran away.."

you looked down fidgeting with your fingers. honestly you found jake easy to open up too. he was someone who was easy to talk to and instantly made anyone feel comfortable in his presence. so it wasnt hard to be truthful with him. it felt nice honestly.

its not like you couldn't talk to your best friends, its just that, you knew as soon as you did it would make it real. because they would encourage you, and you weren't exactly sure if thats what you wanted yet. with jake, he just was there to listen.

"why? - i mean, whyd you run away?"

"honestly... i dont know" you lied. obviously you couldn't tell him the full truth. you couldn't tell anyone.

"hey, well, if you ever need someone to talk to know that im around" he smiled warmly before playfully reaching over and ruffling your hair.

"i know yunjin and sunoo are great but its obvious they aren't always the most subtle people..." jake chuckled to which you did as well.

"yea, tell me about it."

"im here to listen, and i promise anything you tell me ill keep to myself." he smiled and you could tell he was being genuine.

"thanks jake" you smiled back warmly

"hey, at least we got the project done! no one else seemed to finished today. i bet we will get a 100%" he smiled bumping your arm and heeseung took note of the giggles and closeness clenching his jaw.

"you like her, dont you?"

heeseung snapped his head back to yunjin,

"is it that obvious?"

"hm, not really, well to me yea, but i dont think anyone else has noticed."

heeseung sighed as he admitted his feelings for the first time ever.

"good luck with that, she hasnt dated anyone since like middle school."

"so are you gonna help me out or what?"

"eh, maybe,– maybe if we get a good grade on this assignment."

heeseung sighs like hes doomed bc he knows whatever grade the both of them got on the project would be purely based off if yunjin knew what she was doing, because he did not.

"you are such an idiot, why do you think i agreed to be your partner when she partnered up with jake? its obvious that was the only reason you even asked me. "

"thanks," he smiled

"yea yea, whatever, u should probably hurry up, looks like jake thinks he has some sort of a chance too," she said and both of them shifted their direction to the two of you.

heeseung clenching his jaw as he saw the way jakes hand brushed over your arm.

"does she like him?" he asked gaze still fixated on the both of you.

"no idea, she doesnt talk about any of that, shes always so focused on school i havent heard anything about her having a crush in years."

the conversation slowly simmered out and heeseung got another idea as he saw you finally open your phone. he quickly pulled up his twitter account before tweeting again

gamer.lhee: "you watching me, angel?"

your face immediately turned red seeing the notification, clicking on it and seeing the previous ones. that's when it clicked. the whole time your ringer had been on. he was testing you. he knows.

you quickly stood up and excused yourself to the bathroom, something that was seeming to become a habit now. heeseung followed behind before his arms cornered you against the hallway wall.

"heeseung, what are you-"

he leaned in, dangerously close, lips almost brushing against your ear.

"do you also get this flustered when you watch me at night too?"

- tbc.

dont forget to reblog if you enjoyed it!!! <3 super helpful and appreciated!!

note: also feel free to comment and let me know what you thought of this chapter!! im open to hearing feedback and whatever you guys enjoyed so i can make the next one better!! ^.^ tysm for reading!! hopefully i didnt make too many errors lol..

taglist!: @yohanabanana @heebear @4eeseungz @wonniewonsblog @yangjungwonnie @eugenia29-blog1 @merwdusa @river-demon-slayer @planetmarlowe @woniesbae @ad1m4ise @allthesqueaks @yoonglestangies @clxodyvesprr @millis-diary @immelissaaa @penny44224 (lmk if you'd like to be added <3!)

[norrisainz33]

Wedding bells || ls18

☆ summary: you and lance are getting married!!!

☆ pairing: lance stroll x nonfamous!reader

☆ fc & warnings: none & slightly suggestive if you squint

☆ requested: yes!!! thanks for your patience with me xxoo

masterlist

ﾟ. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ﾟ

ynuser has made a post 🔒

liked by lance_stroll, yourbff, astonmartinf1, chloestroll, friend1, flavy.barla and 322 others

ynuser: pov your best friend asks you to marry him and you cry so hard you forget to say yes! i can’t wait to spend forever with you lance 🤍

view all comments

yourbff: pov im crying my eyes out bc my favorite people are getting married

ynuser: im still crying too its ok

chloestroll: pov im sobbing because im going to have a little sister

ynuser: chloe!!!!!!!!!! stop omg i can't wait to have you as a sister 🤍

friend1: screaming from the rooftops

ynuser: me too bestie

lance_stroll: you said yes eventually so that’s all that matters! i love more than life itself my gorgeous girl

ynuser: i love you to the moon and back handsome

astonmartinf1: congratulations!! we love you both so dearly 💚

ynuser: thank you admin! i love you more

flavy.barla: YAY!!!!!!!!! let the planning begin!!! i can't WAIT

ynuser: neither can i!!! im so excited for all of your help

friend3: i don’t think i’ve ever been this excited for a wedding

ynuser: 😭🤍

lance_stroll has made a post

liked by ynuser, chloestroll, estebanocon31, alexandrasaintmleux, iamrebeccad, lando, astonmartinf1, and 387,294 others

lance_stroll: you’re looking at the future mr and mrs stroll 🤍 from running into each other by accident at tim hortons to getting married. i wouldn’t have it any other way! i love you endlessly y/n

view all comments

user1: we got lance dropping y/nlance lore before gta6 wow

user2: yayayayayyayayaay!!!!!!!

estebanocon: congratulations my dear friend

lance_stroll: thank you for all of your help my friend! it would not have happened without you and flavy 🤍

ynuser: he’s right! thanks flavy.barla for making sure i got my nails done and had a cute dress on that day 🥹

lance_stroll: and thanks estebanocon for helping me get the courage to ask her and for helping me pick the ring

flavy.barla: i literally just stopped crying don’t make me cry again 😫🫶🏻

user2: this is so cute i’m gonna throw up

user3: met at a tim hortons?! god you two are iconic

ynuser: i love you sweet boy 🤍 forever grateful for you spilling your coffee all over me that cold cold december in montreal 😘

lance_stroll: forever grateful that you let me take you out after 💚

lando: these are some sick photos! congrats!

lance_stroll: thanks man!

user18: i just fell to my knees in the walmart parking lot

fernandoalo_oficial: i’m so glad i got to be here to see your love flourish 💚

lance_stroll: thanks for your unwavering support fernando 💚

user18: i love strollonso your honor

chloestroll: YEEEEEESSSSSSSSSS

ynuser: EEEEEEK

user4: wondering when i’m gonna run into my celeb crush at the local tims

ynuser has posted to their story 🔒

view all story replies

lance_stroll: yayyyy!!!! all the guys said yes too 😉

ynuser: incredible news!!!

lance_stroll: esteban even shed a little tear

ynuser: omg 😭😭😭😭

yourbff: i can’t wait to be your maid of honor 🤍

ynuser: you’re the best friend in the world! i wouldn’t want anyone else by my side

friend1: this is going to be the wedding of the century

ynuser: shall i call vogue and let them know?

friend1: ik ur joking but the way they would legit show up

ynuser: …… i do forget lance is famous sometimes

friend1: honestly me too. if you hadn’t brought me to a race i’m not sure i would’ve believed you

chloestroll: literally getting these flowers pressed! i can’t wait for this wedding 😫😭

ynuser: that’s such a cute idea i’m gonna have to get the couple that i have pressed too!!! i need you and your big brain to help me plan. you’re still free this weekend right?

chloestroll: yes!!! i have the whole weekend blocked for you baby girl

astonmartinf1: ahhhhhhhhh!!!! the little newspapers i’m crying

ynuser: you’re too kind admin 💚

flavy.barla: my gorgeous bestie of course i said yes!!!

ynuser: i’m so grateful for you and your friendship flav 🫶🏻

ynuser has posted to their story 🔒

view all story replies

flavy.barla: i can’t stop thinking about that vanilla and berry cake it was divine

ynuser: RIGHT?! it was perfect. i'm so excited to have it again in a few months

chloestroll: ok i’ve been thinking and i really genuinely feel that venue is perfect. the fairmont is so beautiful and being in banff you get the mountains and the whole ski vibe which suits you two so much and i know you were stressed about making the decision but if its any consolation i think you made the right one

ynuser: thank you chlo 🥹 when lance and i toured it last week it felt absoltely perfect but i keep feeling a little guilty about not having the wedding in europe since such a large amount of the people in our lives are there

chloestroll: babydoll its your wedding not anyone elses and if having it at the most beautiful chateau in the mountains of canada is what you want then everyone can make do

ynuser: i have no idea what i'd do without you

chloestroll: you'll never have to know because you're stuck with me forever and ever!!

yourbff: venue? secured. cake? secured. flowers? secured. now we need to focus on outfits which is the most fun part!! lance has got that partially covered tho yea?

ynuser: yes! hugo boss is going to be custom making his suit as well as the groomsmen and lawrence's suits. i am literally so excited to find our dresses you have no idea

friend1: here reporting that our dress shopping appointment in paris is confirmed! (wow that was a crazy sentence to type)

ynuser: AHH!! yay!!!!! let’s goooo!!! thank you so very much for coordinating that

lance_stroll: you are doing an amazing job with all of this planning my love. i continue to be amazed by how incredible you are at everything you do

ynuser: thank you future husband 🤍

lance_stroll: of course my future wife. i am sorry i can't be at more of these planning sessions

ynuser: its ok lancey! i know the season is really picking up and you've gotta focus!! your incredible sister and brother-in-law have been helping me so much

lance_stroll: i'm glad to hear it

francisca.cgomes: literally so honored to have been included in this planning my dear

ynuser: im literally so honored that you even wanted to be involved 😔🫶🏻

francisca.cgomes: are you kidding me?? you're one of my favorite people in the whole world

ynuser: stop i love you🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍

ynuser has made a post 🔒

liked by friend2, lance_stroll, astonmartinf1, chloestroll, pierregasly, estebanocon, francisca.cgomes, and 304 others

ynuser: paused the wedding planning for a weekend to see the love of my life score some stroints 🥹💚

view all comments

estebanocon: was great having you back in the paddock y/n/n

flavy.barla: i second this ❤️

ynuser: was so lovely spending time with you both xxoo

astonmartinf1: you being here made an already amazing weekend that much better!

ynuser: thanks for taking care of me as always admin 😘

lance_stroll: having you in the garage does wonders for my ability to pick up points

ynuser: you’re a star with or without me 🤍

friend2: STROINTS!!!! EVERYONE CHEERED!!!!

ynuser: no for real we’re all celebrating stroints 😭

lance_stroll: hahaha thanks guys

yourbff: thanks for letting me tag along pookie lance_stroll

lance_stroll: i didn’t really have much choice eh? 🤨

yourbff: nope 😉

yoursibling: the second slide is frying me

ynuser: you should see the other ones

yoursibling: SENNNNDDDDDDD NOOWWWWW

lance_stroll: pls no

ynuser has posted to their story 🔒

view all story replies

lance_stroll: ngl i did panic for a second thinking i saw some private story i wasn't supposed to and saw your dress before i was allowed to

ynuser: hahha no no don’t worry you didn’t see anything!! this was one of the contenders but didn’t quite make the cut

lance_stroll: well it certainly is beautiful. i can’t wait to see what you wear tomorrow. i’ve got my tissues ready and everything

ynuser: 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹 you’re so cute

lance_stroll: that’s you baby

yourbff: thanks for posting this pic and not the one with me violently sobbing with snot all over my face

ynuser: i almost did but figured this one was more acceptable

friend3: you look like a princess im

ynuser: i feel like one 🥹🤍

chloestroll: i can’t stop giggling and kicking my feet im so excited for tomorrow

ynuser: SAME!!!!!!

chloestroll: tomorrow you’re going to officially be a stroll 💚

ynuser: yes!!! y/n stroll has the most beautiful ring to it

chloestroll: welcome to the family 😘

ynuser: oh i’m crying again

francisca.cgomes: i feel like a little kid on christmas eve

ynuser: me too. i literally can’t sleep

astonmartinf1: we just made it!! jumping for literal joy rn

ynuser: yay!!!! i can’t wait to see you 🤍

lance_stroll has made a post

liked by ynstroll, chloestroll, estebanocon, astonmartinf1, francisca.cgomes, and 765,294 others

lance_stroll: a few moments from the best day of my entire life. y/n - i am so grateful that i get to love you until the end of time. thank you for making my life complete my gorgeous wife 🤍❄️

view all comments

ynstroll: i’m so grateful for you in more ways than you could ever imagine my dear husband 🤍

lance_stroll: likewise 😘

user1: a winter wedding suits you both so well 😭

chloestroll: so unbelievably happy for you both. watching you two fall in love over the past few years has been nothing short of a gift. ynstroll thank you for bringing so much light to my baby brothers life 💚

ynstroll: sobbing chloe i am so thankful to have such a wonderful sister in law and best friend like you

lance_stroll: you gotta stop making me cry so much this weekend chlo

user18: the definition of private but not secret and i love them so dearly

estebanocon: honored to have been up there with you man. congratulations ❤️

lance_stroll: thankful to have had you there mate

user31: estie was one of lances groomsmen??? someone get me some tissues

flavy.barla: my two most favorite people ever ❤️‍🔥

ynstroll: ❤️❤️❤️❤️

user22: i love seeing you happy lance

astonmartinf1: a winter break to never forget 💚 [liked by lance_stroll]

yourbff: i’m not crying you are!

lance_stroll: real

user44: congratulations!!!!! been a y/n lance truther since day 1

ﾟ. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ﾟ

a/n: thanks for reading!!! likes and reblogs are always appreciated! truly obsessed with the sheer amount of lance requests i’ve gotten

ﾟ. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ﾟ

disclaimer: pictures are not mine and everything i write is fiction

© norrisainz33 || please do not rewrite, translate, or copy any of my works posted here on to any other platform

[alaia777]

BLLK GUYS AS YOUR PETTY EX

you thought the breakup was civil, but your ex? not so much. turns out, he’s got a petty side that you never knew existed.

when you and bachira broke up, you thought it ended on good terms. so when you told him to come pick up his things, you didn’t think much of it—until the next morning, when you went to grab a pair of socks and realized not a single one had a matching pair. you searched everywhere, convinced you had just misplaced them, until it finally hit you—he took every single match just to mess with you.

you ended things with sendou because you wanted to focus on yourself, and he was surprisingly understanding, claiming he needed to focus on his career too. he didn’t unfollow you on social media, liking your stories occasionally, but every now and then he’d post something like, “some people really fumble blessings 😴,” and you couldn’t help but wonder if it was aimed at you.

nagi never bothered to remove you from his streaming accounts, but he’d definitely mess with your watchlist. he’d delete whatever you were watching, leaving you to start over, and change your profile name to something like “not your personal account” or “who’s watching this?”— petty, but it was hard not to laugh.

after the breakup, sae would randomly venmo you $0.01 with the memo “for the emotional damage,” like it was the most casual thing in the world. you’d get a notification, and it was always the same—just one cent, but the audacity behind it had you questioning whether he was trolling you or genuinely trying to make a point.

you knew chigiri was petty, you saw that throughout the course of your relationship, but the difference was it was never aimed at you. until now. your friend had sent you a screenshot of chigiri’s instagram post — he was at your favorite hidden cafe, the one you’d always kept to yourself. the caption read, “new favorite spot.” you stared at the post, your heart sinking, knowing full well that with his big following, the cafe would be swarming with people now. seriously, chigiri?

you always knew why your relationship with oliver didn’t last—you deserved better. so, when you found someone who made you feel like you were their only one, you went public with it, sharing it proudly on instagram. as for oliver? he reacted to your post with a 😂.

when shidou saw your new boyfriend signed up for a marathon, he didn’t hesitate. he signed up too, made sure to get the best time, and posted a picture of himself crossing the finish line with the caption, ‘beat that’ — just to make sure you knew who really came out on top.

you’ve been getting really into rock climbing lately, feeling proud of your progress, and next thing you know, rin shows up at the climbing gym, acting like he’s been climbing for years. he casually scales the hardest wall with ease, while you’re still trying to figure out how to not fall on your face. he doesn’t smile, just watches you struggle with that intense stare of his, making it clear he’s here to outdo you at your own hobby. now, every time you go, he’s there, silently trying to one-up your climbs.

you always begged barou to stop styling his hair the same way and just let it fall naturally, but he’d never listen. after the breakup, you scrolled through his stories, and there it was—a picture of him with his hair exactly how you always wanted it. no caption, just him casually showing off the thing you’d asked for all along.

isagi keeps liking every single post you make, even the ones about your new relationship, but he’s always the last to do it. he’ll wait just long enough for you to see it, but not so long that it seems like he forgot—just enough to make sure you know he’s still watching.

[sunshineangel0]

bang chan + cockwarming/powerplay

a/n- it´s been late. here you go.

“You’re being good,” Chan praises, his voice like velvet, fingers lazily stroking down your spine. “See? I knew you could do it.”

Your legs shake as you try to keep still, thighs burning from the effort of staying seated on his cock without moving. It’s torture—the way he fills you so perfectly yet refuses to let you chase any friction.

“Chan—”

His grip on your hip tightens, stopping you before you can even think about rolling your hips.

“You don’t get to talk, baby,” he murmurs, leaning in to press a kiss to your temple. “You just sit there like a good little thing and keep me warm.”

You whimper, every nerve on fire, but he just chuckles.

“Is it hard?” His fingers trail between your legs, barely brushing over where you need him most. “Want me to touch you?”

You nod frantically, but his smirk tells you he’s already decided the answer.

“That’s too bad,” he muses, resting back against the couch. “Because I like you just like this—helpless.”

©sunshineangel0 𖹭 if you liked this work, please consider reblogging, commenting or liking! xoxo franzi 💋

skz general: @velvetmoonlght @scarlet789 @estella-novella @nightmarenyxx

(if you want to be added to my taglist, please comment under the post.)

[delilahsturniolo]

— ୨୧ means i care . . . m.s

in which . . . matt keeps pushing you away, resulting in an arguement of bitter and regretful words

warnings . . . unresolved angst, arguing, miscommunication, cursing, hurtful wordsss uhhh that’s it i think

written by @delilahsturniolo. do not copy, steal, or modify my works. if you are taking any inspiration from this, please ask me first before posting and credit me in your description. happy reading! :)

SO CLOSE TO WHAT WRITING MARATHON . . . fic #13

the moment you see matt, everything feels off. the air is thick with tension, the kind you can almost taste, and you know it’s coming. it always does. the simmering frustration, the distance that feels like it’s finally going to boil over. he’s standing there, talking to someone else, laughing like he doesn’t even realize how it feels to be in the same room with you. like nothing has changed.

you watch him, trying to ignore the twisting in your gut, the ache that won’t go away no matter how many times you tell yourself it’s fine. but it’s not fine. not when you can barely look at him without feeling something sharp pierce through your chest. not when you know that he’s been keeping distance, but you can’t figure out why. not when you feel like you’re falling apart and he’s completely oblivious.

you can’t take it anymore.

“you think you can just ignore me?” you blurt out before you can stop yourself, your voice louder than you intended, and it catches matt’s attention immediately.

his head snaps toward you, eyes narrowing. “what are you talking about?” matt says, his tone already defensive. he always gets defensive when you push, but you’re done tiptoeing around him. you need answers. “you know exactly what I’m talking about,” you snap, taking a step toward him, heart pounding. “every time we’re near each other, you act like I’m invisible. like I don’t matter.”

matt opens his mouth, but the words don’t come out right away. he’s clearly taken aback, but there’s an edge to his expression, one that tells you he’s been waiting for this moment. “you’re imagining things,” he says finally, trying to brush it off with a casual shrug. “I don’t know why you’re making this such a big deal.”

“a big deal?” you laugh bitterly, the sound of it mocking in the silence between you. “you’ve been pushing me away for weeks, and you think I’m imagining it? it’s like you don’t even care anymore, like I’m just some—some afterthought.”

matt looks away for a moment, clearly uncomfortable, and it only makes your frustration worse. “I’m not pushing you away,” he mutters, voice quieter, almost as if he’s trying to convince himself more than you. “I’m just… trying to figure things out.”

“figure things out?” your voice rises again, and you can feel the heat crawling up your neck. “about what, exactly? what’s so complicated about us? are we just… nothing to you now?”

his jaw tightens at that, and you can see it in his eyes, the way they flicker with something you can’t place. “this isn’t just about you,” matt says, finally meeting your gaze head-on. “I’ve got my own shit going on. you don’t know what it’s like to be me right now.”

you take a step back, stunned by the words. “so that’s it? that’s your excuse?” you’re almost laughing now, but it’s not a laugh, it’s a sharp, hollow sound that doesn’t make it past your throat. “you’re too busy for me, and that’s supposed to make it okay? because I’m not just sitting here waiting for you to decide if I’m worth your time, alright?”

matt seems taken aback, eyes widening slightly, but there’s still that angry edge to his voice. “you don’t get it, do you?” he spits, taking a step closer, his anger matching yours. “I can’t just drop everything for you. you think I’m the one who’s been messing things up, but maybe you’re the one pushing me away by making everything about us.”

“maybe you’re just too afraid to admit that you don’t care as much as you say you do!” the words come out before you can stop them, the anger and hurt too much to hold back anymore. “maybe you’re just scared of actually letting someone in. and you know what? I’m done being the one who’s always there, waiting for you to maybe notice me. because I’ve had enough.”

his eyes flash with something raw—something that looks like guilt, but it’s hard to tell because it’s buried so deep under his frustration. “I don’t need you to make everything harder,” he says, voice low, but there’s no mistaking the edge now. “I’m not the one who’s been shutting you out. you’re the one who won’t let me in.”

“because you won’t let me in,” you hiss, the words bitter in your mouth. “you’ve been keeping me at arm’s length, and every time I try to get close, you push me further away. I’m tired of being the one who has to fight for your attention. I’m done.” matt’s expression hardens, his fists clenching at his sides. “fine. if you’re done, then maybe it’s better this way,” he says, voice sharp, like it’s a challenge.

you take a deep breath, your chest heaving. every part of you wants to scream, to tell him everything you’ve been holding in. but instead, you just stand there, silent, staring at him like you don’t recognize the person in front of you anymore.

there’s a part of you that wants to scream at matt, tell him how you feel, show him everything you’ve kept hidden behind the walls you’ve built around your heart. but then you remember the distance between you two, the space you’ve allowed to grow over time. it feels like a chasm now, a canyon you can’t cross. and you can’t bring yourself to cross it, not when he doesn’t even seem to care.

he doesn’t say anything more, just turns on his heel and walks away, leaving you standing there with your heart thrashing against your ribcage, the weight of everything you’ve just said sinking in. and for a moment, you wonder if it was all worth it, if everything you’ve said—everything you’ve fought for—will even matter in the end.

but you can’t take it back. not now. the damage had already been done.

© delilahsturniolo do not copy, re use, or modify any of my works.

taglist

a/n 💌: we are approaching the end of the writing marathon, only 2 more fics left! :(

[lighting-and-shadow]

Ikigai, Part 1

I previously posted a blurb/preview of a soulmate AU with Sylus and a Non MC Reader. Here is the full length fic. Hope you all enjoy because there's more fics to come with this man from me (he has me in a goddamn chokehold; I already have so many drafts 😭).

Length: 2.2k words

Not completely proofread.

🥀 🌹 🥀 🌹 🥀 🌹 🥀 🌹 🥀 🌹 🥀 🌹 🥀 🌹 🥀 🌹 🥀 🌹 🥀 🌹

You sit on Sylus' bed, restless despite the exhaustion that clings to your body. It’s like a noose with every second that goes by. Yet, you know rest will never come to you. Not for some time at least. So, you pass the time with tapping.

Tap. Tap. Tap. Broken nails tap uselessly and frequently against the expensive sheets. No amount of this makes the ire in your blood burn any less.

"Sylus," you call out to the man in question, who merely hums your name in response. "Have I ever told you that you're the biggest fool I've met?"

Sylus stands in his bathroom, door wide open as always. He stopped showering or tending to his wounds with it closed long ago. You can't quite remember how long. It's just how it is. Has it made for some embarrassing moments where he teases you with a towel barely around his waist as you struggle to keep your eyes solely on his (and not his chest that you want to run your hands on or his neck you want to bury your face in as you drift to sleep)? Yes.

Would you want it any other way? No.

"Is that so, sweetie? I must've gone deaf the last few hours, and missed it. Mind repeating yourself so I can etch it into my mind for future reference?"

"You're the biggest fool I've ever met."

He chuckles. The rich laughter makes your heart flutter and you almost immediately march over to help him.

"May I remind you that you work for this fool? What does that make you?"

"What indeed…"

The pair of you sit in silence except for the sounds of Sylus digging into his own skin to remove a bullet that seems to be giving him particular trouble.

"Be a dear and help your boss out, sweetie."

Part of you wants to give in, as you've done so many times. Sylus' tone gives away that he knows that too. Even without seeing his face, you can imagine the smug smirk it has. Oh how you want to kiss that smirk away so badly.

And that's exactly why you can't comply with his request. You need to put your foot down. Maybe being belligerent will help quell these annoying feelings. Sylus isn't meant to be yours, after all.

"No thanks."

You stare at his thread of fate. It shimmers the same red that everyone else's does. That red used to alarm you as a child. Now, all you see is him. Him and his beautiful red you wish to burrow yourself in forever.

Now that red helps not give into him. Helps you remember that if you want him to meet his soulmate in one piece, you couldn't keep letting him do this.

"Seriously?"

"Yep. My foolish boss did this to himself, so he should pay the price."

"And what price is that?"

"The price of spending who knows how long digging bullets out of his skin."

"Of course. Whatever you say sweetie. A far better price than what… hmmm… what was his name? George? Jarold?"

He's teasing you again. The drawl in his voice told you as much. He didn't even bother to hide the slight chuckles he let out at your tired sigh.

"James," you reply.

"Yes, Jake," now he was just fucking with you. "The price he was demanding for such mediocre business was… appalling. I much prefer this."

You snort at your boss, "Just keep telling yourself that bossman."

"I will, sweetie."

Silence engulfs the pair of you. For you, it sits on your chest, swims in your blood, and chews on your skin. The quiet gnaws at you, a steady and annoying and repetitive peaking reminiscent of Mephisto.

You hate it. But you must maintain it. Even when Sylus glances over his shoulder at you. You're sure to avoid eye contact with him. One look is all it would take for you to storm over to him and tenderly take the bullets out of his skin.

Not this time. This time, you had to be firm.

Your mind drifts back to the meeting. There wasn't anything special about this particular one. Hell, it wasn't even a weapons deal. Rather, James was apparently an old friend of Sherman's with a vinyl collection. The stupid man had gone off the rails recently.

Was it surprising that he did? Not in the least bit. It did make for a good laugh over diner one day though. About how this man thought he could take you two down. Sylus and his faithful companion with a silver tongue, one that seemed to speak to very depths of your soul.

Taking down Sherman wouldn't be difficult. Nothing ever was with you two being the well-oiled machine you are together. But, you never liked being unprepared. You're cautious to a fault. And Sylus wanted to easy your worrying, or nagging as he called it.

Enter James: a connection to Sherman you dug up. One with a pension for vintage music and antique jewelry. It should've been an easy deal. Especially once you saw his thread.

James' thread was a dim red. A red you hadn't seen for quite sometime. A red you didn't expect from someone like him.

A dead soulmate. You could hear the deceased man's faint screams. You could see their final hours together as illness wracked the poor boy. God, they must've been about 16; James had to be at least in his mid 30's now. He still clings to his soulmate all these years later, a simple tattoo over his heart to symbolize the love that was lost too early.

You pitied the man. He wasn't a good man, with countless lives lost at his hands and many loves cut too short because of his actions, but the loss of a soulmate is something no one recovers from. It's one of those things that immutable in this world.

So you used that to crack through his icy exterior. Peeled it back layer by layer until his soul danced in the palm of your hand. James was at your command. Until your boss shattered that.

"Why are you so mad at me, my sweet Gamayun?"

You can't help it: you look up and are immediately greeted by your boss' smug face. And you're angry at falling for his trick. For a moment.

Then you lock eyes. Deep, deep, crimson, so similar yet so unlike the threads of fate you see so often. His red is a good red. His red is the red of your love rather than everyone else's. Sometimes you wonder if his red eyes are your thread of fate, that they're your soulmate connection.

Any other day, you'd soak in the attention of that red. You can't right now. Because in a fraction of a second, you see it. You see the hurt he's trying to cover. You see in his soul how his wounds ache and how he wants your forgiveness, how he wants to make you smile (for some reason).

It's all you need to move from his bed and approach his back. He still looks at you, smirk gone and expression soft with something you can't place. You ignore it. He turns around so that his bare chest faces you. You struggle to not let yourself be flustered.

”It's nothing you haven't seen before. It's no big deal. You're just business partners and companions. Nothing else.”

"Gimme your gauze."

Your tone is sharp. Maybe because you hope to cover how weirdly intimate this feels: your boss basically naked and unguarded as you try to tend to his wounds.

You focus your eyes onto his hands. He holds his bandages in them. You reach for them, but he moves his hand away. You reach again, and Sylus raises his hand above his head, and raises an eyebrow at you.

You can't even be mad at him when he does.

"Why, Gamayun?"

There’s that nickname again. It carries so much. His trust, his affection, and his heart. Just not in the way you hope.

Gamayun carries false dreams, fantasies that haunt you as you sleep at night. Gamayun is a fake promise of a love you'll never have. But it was yours, so you gladly take ownership of it.

"You're pathetic…"

"Because my foolish Morana apparently can't clean up his own messes."

"Ah, but that's why I have you, my sweet, beautiful, and kind Gamayun."

Your hands tremble as you pull back on the roll of gauze. You think Sylus laughs at you, but you can't hear it over the pounding of your heart.

"Stop it," you want to tell him. "Stop giving me hope."

It doesn't take long for you to finish. You help Sylus dress, despite knowing he doesn't in any way, shape, or form need you help. He stopped you when you tried to leave after finishing his bandages, so you figure you wouldn't even bother for now.

"Sylus, what're you—"

"Sylus? Who's Sylus? Since when did you know a Sylus?"

You roll your eyes at him.

“Have you suddenly become a decrepit old man with my noticing?”

"No," he then lifts you into your arms and forces you to meet his eyes.

He stares into your eyes; you stare right back, praying that you give nothing away. He walks towards his bed, still looking at you.

"You must be really mad at me if you're calling me by my name right now."

"Don't be so dramatic you big baby. I called you by name earlier.”

Sylus pays no heed to words. In fact, he takes them in stride, placing you slowly onto his bed. His movements are slow, precise. Almost as if he's afraid to hurt you. But that’s ridiculous; he could never hurt you.

"Are his injuries still causing him problems?"

You keep that thought in mind in order to not trick yourself. In order to not gaslight yourself into believing that there's something more behind his actions. Sylus and you have always had an intimate relationship. Closer than most ever will be. Best friends. Partners in crime.

"This means nothing."

You try to get out of bed, to run away to wallow in your sorrows, but Sylus plops down next you and wraps an arm around you.

"Sleep. We'll discuss this later."

A protest builds up in your throat. It’s pushed back down when his arms tightens around you and his breathing evens out into soft puffs. He’s not asleep; you know that, and he knows you know that. But you play along anyway.

Turning in his arms to play with his hair, you think more about what happened earlier. At how Sylus kept trying to get between you and James when you guys got closer. At how Sylus seemed more passive aggressive with the man the more you two talked, forgetting that there was even someone else in the room. At how Sylus would subtly move you away from James when a crack in the man’s facade would appear at your words.

He got worse when you reciprocated. Of course, you always did on these missions; it’s a great way to build rapport. Today was different. Today was real. You really felt for James. You really wanted to reach him. As someone who also understands of the pain of being without a soulmate—soulless, as society would call you.

But you were different. You didn’t lose your soulmate. You never had one. All you could do was watch as others loved and lost, doomed to never experience the same.

Things exploded when James asked if he could see you again. A normal request from clients and prospective/current business partners alike. But you never quite clicked with them the same way you had with James, a man whose heart was so hurt, much like your own. You hope the poor man is still alive.

Sleep begins to creep up on you as you remember the vigor in Sylus protest. Honestly, it was kind of hot; you rarely get to see him lose composure. Even less so during business exchanges. You burrow into his embrace at the thought. Of the way his face contorted with rage. At the way his Evol thrashed out at those around you.

You use that to cover what you truly remember: the gentle way that same power carried you to safety (he was always weirdly protective of you because of your lack of Evol; strange, considering what you’re capable of). The worried way he asked if you were alright. The kind way he treated you despite your anger.

But, why were you angry? Why are you still angry? Because he once again used violence when it wasn’t needed? Because he didn’t listen when you told him to back off? Because he got himself hurting protecting you? Because this showed that deep down he doesn’t trust you?

No. Never.

Sylus trusts you with everything. And you, in turn, trust him with everything. Well, except one thing: your heart. Maybe that was why you were mad at him. Because when he does things like that, it makes it so hard to let him go.

🥀 🌹 🥀 🌹 🥀 🌹 🥀 🌹 🥀 🌹 🥀 🌹 🥀 🌹 🥀 🌹 🥀 🌹 🥀 🌹

Taglist: @eolivy, @rafayelridesfisheatsfish, @animegamerfox, @jasperjokester, @schrodingerskimdokja, @just--crys, @snowdynasty, @shi-thats-kiera, @mansonofmadness, @dwuclvr, @ameilli, @katiedoesstuff101, @everythingistaken00, @napa-the-yappa, @hanaluxx, @lovesick-sylus, @madam8, @tenaciouszombiewombat, @ladyparamount, @applepi405, @midnight-reverie, @69-gojos-wife-69, @bellagrayson-wayne, @phisen, @idkmanimjusthorny, @munchychuusy, @autumn2534, @poptrim, @sillyfreakfanparty, @zaynesfirefly, @flamedancer13, @thissmartdumbass, @mrsllawliet, @jeondyy, @ssetsuka, @dels-page, @that-lost-one, @johnnysactualgf, @mariquitas-en-verano @toelady, @sinnamon-bunn, @yesbiaswrecked, @doggyteam2028, @little-rays-of-darkness, @albatrossblue, @vyntheria, @silverianni, @browneyedgirl22, @tiklestar, @beaconsxd, @pepperushia, @ottjhe, @an-ever-angry-bi, @yellowxiaotae, @ni3rdem1se, @vigtore, @picnicinthegarden, @karafrost, @legallyblindasian, @tinyweebstuff, @fantastucbaby, @raraluvz, @merodis, @gremlinartstudio, @lazypostfandomer, @lukassafespace, @caramelizedpopcirn, @theariesview, @dilf-destroyer-04, @rosebelize, @nommingonfood, @mimeiee, @anon34570, @xiofuu, @yumesagashite, @animecrazy76, @olxh, @zaynessbeloved, @acutelilmess

[gem-de-lune]

Ahhhhh!!!!!

YOU GUYS

I have done a flipped pyramid reading today.

1 How Seunghan's situation is going

2 How SM is feeling regarding his return to Riize

3 Final Outcome

To keep it brief, on the physical realm level Seunghan seems a bit worried or scared. The 5 of cups was the first thing I pulled so I was a bit worried at first but this seems to be dramatics lmao. He seems to be thinking that the chance is gone at the moment, but there is something very clearly approaching him from behind that he doesn't realize yet. Someone in a position to do so will be helping him by making a decision based on their own moral compass and will. Female. This could be the female we have been talking about. She is and has been working very hard up to now.

For SM- I was very pleased. This is the first time I have EVER pulled clear affirmatives for them in regards to Seunghan's return. Thoe outlook is good. The Ace of Wands makes it seem like they are ready to continue a story, and the 10 of Cups speaks of proper unity and resolution. The outcome is set to be favorable in every way, and they are taking action to ensure that it remains untainted and celebrated this time.

The outcome being Justice is very, very telling. Whatever happens, it will be fair and balanced. This is a good indicator that there is intention to set things right and do the right thing. People and entities will be standing their ground when the decision comes to light.

I see this happening very soon, though I cannot say when- I feel that it's in preparation. When I asked for an indicator that the time is HERE i pulled the King of Swords-

So feathers, silver shiny things, claws, and the colors white, black, TEAL and red stand out. Look for those in regards to Riize promotions or any related media or posts ahead of announcements.

Notes

I have done this lil reading today as I woke up. I am still waking up as we speak lol. I miss Riize very much and needed to check in personally.

The reason I took some time away was not only because i was busy with school and work- (as usually I manage well) but in my passion and drive to do readings every day not just for yall, but for me too- I had a bit of an energy depletion. I was not well for the holiday season up to this point as I had overdone it, which I did realize but did not understand to what extent until I suddenly couldn't do my readings very well anymore and the answers were getting extremely fuzzy. So I stopped for a bit altogether. I got too excited 😅 These are just excuses, but I do feel that I owe you all some explanation for distancing a while. Thank you to everyone who checked up on me 🩵 I am well, and hope you all are too. Please hang in there. Whatever happens it is divine timing and all the fairest outcome for Riize.

THE TIME IS NIGH!!!!

[sierrabravoecho]

Why does Ilyn clack when he laughs?

Caveat: I'm a Speech and Language Therapist who doesn't specialise in glossectomy with too much time on my hands

One of Ilyn's defining characteristics is the fact that 14 years before we're introduced to him in AGOT, he was mutilated by Aerys Targaryen:

While the removal of a person's tongue using hot pincers is barbaric, we do have a modern analogue: glossectomy.

A glossectomy is a surgical procedure involving the partial or complete removal of the tongue. It is typically performed to treat tongue cancer, but it may also be necessary in cases of other medical conditions affecting the tongue. Here's an example of a person's speech at different time points post total glossectomy.

As a result of his glossectomy, GRRM doesn't include any verbal output from Ilyn in the text (i.e spoken words).

However, there is one distinct vocal (i.e using voice but not necessarily words, such as humming, singing, or individual sounds) characteristic that we see repeatedly from Ilyn: the clacking sound that tells us that he's amused.

Here's the thing about laughter: unlike speech, where precise tongue movements are needed to form sounds, laughter doesn't require the same level of articulation.

This MRI of spontaneous laughter shows us that the main processes in producing laughter are movement of the velum (soft palate), movement of the pharyngeal walls, and retraction and lowering of the tongue. Given what we know about Ilyn, we can assume the only process that's interrupted here is the retraction and lowering of the tongue.

So why exactly does he clack when he laughs?

First of all, we need to define what is meant by clacking.

The broad dictionary definition is a sharp, repetitive sound made when two hard surfaces quickly strike each other. In the context of vocal sounds, we need to consider a few possibilities:

Speech sounds

Clicks

I'm going to be giving a lot of examples using the International Phonetic Alphabet (IPA) here so if you want some quick resources here's the Wikipedia page, and here's an interactive version of the IPA chart where you can click and hear each sound.

Speech sounds

We're assuming, as Aerys had his "tongue ripped out", there is a significant portion of Ilyn's tongue missing. Because of this, for place of articulation I'm going to be focusing on the portion of the IPA chart from palatal sounds to glottal sounds. Because clacking requires two surfaces striking each other, there are three different manners of articulation which we could consider: plosives, taps/ flaps, and trills. However, when we consider both place and manner of articulation together, there are only a few sounds which Ilyn could produce, all plosive sounds (where articulators fully close, stopping airflow, and then release it with a burst).

Given that the sounds are described as "clacking" rather than "gulping", I'm going to assume that the sounds are voiceless plosives (typically align more with /k/ sounds) rather than voiced plosives (typically align more with /g/ sounds). This gives us three different ideas of what the clacking might sound like (I'm eliminating the glottal stop as this is a complete closure of the vocal cords, e.g the space between the first and second words in uh-oh):

voiceless palatal plosive

voiceless velar plosive

voiceless uvular plosive

2. Clicks

We can also use the IPA to transcribe clicks, which are used in some African languages.

Again, given that we can assume a significant portion of Ilyn's tongue is missing, we can narrow this down to one type of click, as it's the only type of click which does not require the tip of the tongue: an alveolar lateral click.

Yes, but you still haven't explained why he clacks rather than laughs.

There's a reason I still haven't given a clear explanation: it doesn't make much sense.

We've seen in the MRI above that laughter requires lowering and retraction of the tongue, but all the examples of clacking sounds require the raising of the tongue in order for it to strike another articulator to produce the required sound.

There's one exception to producing laughter where the tongue is raised rather than lowered or neutral: giggling.

With giggling, the vowels produced are closer to front closed vowels rather than the neutral schwa or lower, open vowels.

TL;DR: Ilyn clacks when he laughs because he's a giggler.

[lara4eclipze]

— 𝓑reakin' dishes

— ( 🎻 ) I'm breakin' dishes up in here, all night (uh-huh) I ain't gon' stop until I see police lights (uh-huh) I'ma fight a man

meret manon x fem reader, jealousy, angst(?), fluff, mentions of men , party, swearing, protective!manon, loser!reader, wc [?], tags listed below

manon had been excited about this party for the longest time — she had everything planned out, what she would wear and how it would match what you'd wear too

it was the annual hybe anniversary party — all sorts of idols and staffs will be there which intimidated you, i mean not to be boastful or anything but your girlfriend is one of the most talented people ever which is why she'd probably not recognize the problem of you coming along

you are a very private person, barely posting on your socials nor making that many friends — you talk to 4 people max

"come on love, I'll be there! — and the rest of the girls" manon says convincing you as she applies her gloss, you have worn a black cocktail dress with pearl accessories which the ghanian also had to force you to wear

"plus look at you, you're the prettiest girl right now — and every day, i swear my love no one would judge you" the older compliments with that smug grin plastered on her face

"okay enough of you miss bannerman" you roll your eyes at manon due to her teasing — you both walk out of the apartment her hands on your waist as if you were gonna run off which made you internally laugh

during the drive, you felt the older woman's eyes glued on you, you smirk a bit because of how flustered she makes you over small things

manon is the epitome of obsession, even her members can testify to that, her wallpaper? you, her necklace? your initial, everything is you basically

the place was lively and loud to say the least, many famous faces were running around, dancing even singing — manon's eye immediately lit up with excitement which you found adorable

the party was amazing, you and manon had a great time, well until she got sweeped up by her friends, it was scary to you especially you didnt know anyone at all and not to mention you didnt even work under hybe

manon was busy talking to some friends and god you couldn't stop staring at her she looked so beautiful under the messy lights, her lips looked much more enticing especially when it was covered in liquor

"hey there pretty" you hear a man snicker behind you, despite your initial discomfort you decided to talk to him, he reeked of alcohol and he wasn't much of a looker neither

"hi" you shortly responded turning your attention back at your phone, but he was just getting closer by the second the next her hand was on your chair

"come on flash me a smile, don't be rude" his annoying remark well annoyed you, you wanted to push him off but it wouldn't be right since you barely knew this dude

his hands suddenly grasp your shoulder and you froze in spot, mainly out of fear and partly disgust, a man had this much audacity even when you have shown clear signs of dislike to him

"are you fucking mute or what bitch" the man sneers you wanted to run but you were unfortunately cornered and no one would look at where you were sitting

your hands started getting sweaty from fear as your heart thumped against your chest, the urge to scream was definitely there but you couldn't bring yourself to

"hey get the fuck off her, are you seriously cornering my girlfriend?" you hear manon speak behind the man pushing him off you as he falls you see a look of anger flashing in his eyes

manon was even more mad though, her stance indicated she was ready to fight if needed, her fists clenched and her eyes darken, "ill give you a chance to fucking leave or I'll get security to drag you out" manon mutters trying to relax

you look at manon, very grateful you had a strong girlfriend but scared that she might get hit by the dude, you walk up beside her holding her arms with yours

"let him be, let's go please" you silently plead to the older girl, afraid of the lengths she would go to for you, especially when she had seen how the guy disrespected you

manon scoffs, holding your wrist tightly as you two walk away, going near the rest of the kats, worry plastered all over their faces as they notice the oldest demeanor

at home the ghanian girl looked rather guilty, as she watches you get ready for bed — her eyes telling you just how bad she felt

"baby, are you alright?" you ask manon, sitting beside her as you trace circles on her arms a comforting gesture that had always calmed her down

"i just- I'm so annoyed with myself, I thought you were flirting with that dude earlier, that's why I stormed over" manon admits her eyes watery, as her lips pout out

"baby its alright, i understand i should've told him off when it started" you coo at her

"but still, i shouldn't be that easily jelous" manon frowns, "but its okay!, manon we all feel emotions — i understand how you felt now stop being mad at yourself" you respond

"and hey you defended me from that creep, okay? don't be harsh on yourself" you mutter taking the girls face in your hands kissing her cheeks till it was tinted pink

"i love youuu, please don't stop being jealous i find it quite hot" you whisper to the girl who cracks a smile at your declaration

"i swear i was gonna beat him up-" you cut off the older kissing her lips "okay maybe not that aggressive, love"

note : hi ppl sorry for lack of updates life has js been hectic for me :((, anyways love u alll!!!

[deadrobinthoughts]

⚠︎ tied with intention : tim.

⋆˙⟡ "You're such a mess.. shaking, crying like this. You don't even realize how perfect you are, do you?"

⋆˙⟡ request: going off your hc post, i need tim to do the hair tie thing before going down on his lover thanks for that ↦ kalico note: apparently, this is my punishment for putting messy, long haired + 90s attitude tim in peoples head.. + rated post, respect my rules. i do not care that it's mostly just vague bs.

the lamp light is low and the room is quiet. the kind of quiet that hums with anticipation. you weren't entirely sure how you got here, back against the headboard and legs open. loose, lazy but not uninviting by any means.

tim’s already between them, still fully clothed, unsurprising. always tactical. composed. the same intense tim that stalks around like he's planning to murder half the people who bother him.

tonight, though, there's something different that you can't name. you're watching him, wondering if it's your own nerves or if he's planning something.

granted, he's always planning something.

he kneels, palms warm against your thighs. he doesn't say anything, just looks at you for a moment.

it's brief but you can see it, the barely contained hunger. any other day and you'd already be teasing him, but you suddenly can't find the words.

your gaze follows as he brings his wrist to his mouth, teeth catching the thin, black hair tie that's settled around it. the one that's always there or discarded on the nightstand.

he keeps it there, hanging against his bottom lip.

you have to stop yourself from shifting, from letting your nerves get the best of you. because you've seen this display before.

it’s not vulgar. it’s not even explicit. it’s the control, the fluid movements - the message behind it all.

he’s going to take his time.

tim lifts both hands, fingers threading into the shoulder length mess of dark hair before carefully collecting it. you watch the way his biceps flex, the way his jaw tightens as he works out a tangle.

the hair tie slips from his mouth into his hand, and in a single, practiced twist, he pulls his hair into a messy, barely contained half bun.

you're genuinely unsure of how to breathe for a moment, because god, he's hot. you can't even believe your response to the scene was so.. juvenile.

wanting to reach for him, your fingers curl into the sheets below, knowing the show of desperation will only get you a raised brow. he doesn't like being rushed, doesn't like being interrupted.

not for something like this.

you barely have time to think before he presses a kiss to the inside of your thigh. a reverent, lingering kiss. the kind of gesture that says; you’ve been on my mind all day.

his hands slide up your legs, thumbs pressing just so into the skin, over muscle and twitching nerves. he kisses again, closer now.

again; slow, just above the knee. getting even closer. he noses along the crease of your thigh, one arm sliding under your thigh, hand curling to grip onto you, coaxing your legs further.

his breath is warm when it ghosts across you, something that sends a chill down your spine. he finally speaks, a low mumble, lips far too close to brushing against sensitive skin;

"gonna let me stay here a while?"

you nod. maybe you breathe his name, you're not even sure. it doesnt really matter, not when he’s already smiling against your skin, already shifting lower like neither of you have anywhere to go for the rest of the evening.

the first real contact makes you jerk the tiniest bit and he barely acknowledges it, just tightens his grip and presses his tongue just a little harder.

you aren't sure whether to call him a show off or a bastard.

focused.

the last thing you see before your head falls back and your lips part to beg and moan, is the look on his face.

determined. mildly amused. focused. like he's about to devour, memorize, worship every inch of you until you can't remember your own name.

because when tim drake decides to love you, it's not always soft.

it's teeth and tongue, and trembling devotion.

it always ends with him whispering how beautiful you are; sobbing and shaking, whimpering his name like some kind of prayer.

[wooyokitty]

HAI

i love ur ateez headcannons.. please sub seonghwa 🥀🥀

ANYWAYS can u perchance write a sub!seonghwa x reader where seonghwa is caught jerking off without readers permission and is punished for it.. PLEASENESSS 😞😞😞😞

"Listen To Me."

sub!seonghwa x gn!reader

☆ masterlist

link of the atz headcannons mentioned here

cw: post-orgasm torture, forced orgasms, idk.. </3 a/n: thanks for the req my dearest friend heeheh i tried to do the best i could for this.. u better start praising me for doign this in the span of one sitting..very hard thing for me to do!!! /j also im sorry for how short it is i struggle with making my writings either insanely long or too short because i dont want them to be too long </33

Seonghwa knew he shouldn't even think about doing this, he knew the consequences of his actions, but he was missing you so bad, and you weren't here to help him with the growing need he felt in his pants..

He was laying down on your shared bed, alone with his phone in his hand. He set the phone down, sliding it under his pillow as he then started shifting around under the covers. He started to lay on his back, spreading his legs slightly and diving into his pants and underwear, feeling his painful hard-on. You were out on a business trip, but Seonghwa had completely forgot that this was the day that you would be returning.

The man then lets out a soft whine at his own touch, beginning to stroke himself slowly and shutting his eyes.

Seonghwa is imagining the touch to be by you, and not him.

As some time goes by, his pace quickens, and he thinks he hears something from afar, but he ignores it since there were no continued noises.

"A-aaahn~!" Seonghwa whines as his body becomes more jittery due to the pleasure. He's so close, and everything feels so intense due to the fact that he knows he shouldn't be touching himself. You had specifically told him he was not allowed to until you came back from your business trip; he disobeyed you.

"Go ahead, baby. Cum." Seonghwa's hands still against his dick as his eyes open, widening immediately.

Since when have you gotten here? Oh, fuck. he's so embarrassed..

"Y/n.." Seonghwa speaks while panting. "I-i'm sorry!—I missed you so much, I couldn't!-" He panics, knowing what he's in for in a few seconds.

"I told you to cum, you should listen to me." your hands reach under the covers, holding Seonghwa's hand and making him jerk himself off. Your voice is almost sarcastic, but demanding. Seonghwa complies hesitantly, stroking himself slowly.

"Go faster, you should know this already." Your voice is cold, but your expressions show the opposite—you almost look amused at the state Seonghwa's in. You love how embarrassed he seems to be. You study Seonghwa's expressions and body language. Seonghwa begins to shudder from the pleasure, chasing his high again. You don't interrupt him as he cums, allowing it to just happen, which is anything but usual to Seonghwa, but you have something else planned for him, a punishment that is unlike the usual ones you give him when he disobeys.

————————————

"Aahg—! Please! Stop, It's too much!" Seonghwa shrieked, body thrashing at the overstimulation on his dick. You didn't stop, though. If anything, you held him down tighter. You had gotten 2 extra orgasms out of him, and you weren't stopping until he's learned his lesson. "Just one more, hmm?~ My baby's gotta learn how to respect my orders somehow.." you grinned, devouring Seonghwa's pathetic state with your eyes. Seonghwa just let out a strangled cry at your words; he knows he doesn't have a say in it. He has to bare this torture on his dick like it's the last thing he'll ever live to feel.

Seonghwa feels your hands leave his dick, and he lets out a shaky sigh in relief, chest heaving as he tried to catch his breath. You then start to undress yourself, lowering yourself onto Seonghwa's red, spent dick. The gasp he lets out is delicious, he obviously expected everything to end, but fortunately enough for you, you weren't even close to done. You were going to ride him until YOU were now satisfied with yourself.

It's safe to say that Seonghwa indeed learned his lesson after that day...

[simpforbbarnes]

Dust and Destiny pt.6

Pairing : Bucky Barnes x Stark!reader

Summary : Bucky Barnes and you used to be lovers , madly in love. But you lost him in the blip and lost him again after the blip because he need to “find himself”.

Warning : cursing

Words : 2.1k words

I am so sorry for the late post :( im not feeling well and just getting better now :)

Previous Part (pt.5) | Part 6 | Next Part ( pt.7 )

—————————-

The unspoken tension

Joaquin is still standing there, wide-eyed, arms crossed as if he just walked straight into a live grenade.He turns to Sam, muttering under his breath, “Okay. So. Just to be clear. That was not a normal team meeting, right?”

Sam sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Not even close.”Joaquin exhales. “Good. Because I genuinely thought I was about to die in there.”

Sam huffs out a laugh, but it’s tired. Joaquin hesitates, glancing toward the door. “So… what the hell was that?”

Sam looks at him. Really looks at him.

And then, with a heavy breath, he says, “That? That was seven years of grief, heartbreak, and trauma finally catching up to all of us.”

Joaquin frowns. “I mean, yeah, I got that part. But what’s the deal with her and Barnes?”. Sam sighs. “That, my friend, is a whole other can of worms.”

Joaquin raises a brow. “Give me the short version.”

Sam rubs a hand down his face. “The short version? They were in love. She lost him to the Blip for five years. She risked her life to bring him back. And when she did?”

Joaquin waits. Sam exhales sharply.

“He left her.”

Joaquin blinks. “Damn.”. “Yeah,” Sam mutters. “Damn.”

Joaquin shakes his head, running a hand through his hair. “Yeah, uh- remind me to never walk into something like this again.”. Sam snorts. “Oh, trust me, you don’t need reminding.”

Joaquin crosses his arms, still processing everything. Then, after a beat, he turns to Sam and asks,

“So… how did they even meet?”

Sam lets out a breath, shaking his head like he’s been waiting for that question. “Man. That is a long-ass story.”

Joaquin smirks. “Good thing I’m not going anywhere.”

Sam huffs a laugh, leaning back against the table. “Alright. Buckle up, Torres, because this one’s a rollercoaster.”

Joaquin raises an eyebrow. “Oh, this is gonna be good.”

Sam exhales, glancing toward the door where you and Tony had both walked out. His expression softens just a bit.

“It was back where Sokovia Accords kinda shit, tony versus Steve beef,” Sam starts, voice lower now, like he’s telling some old legend. “Bucky was still on the run, brainwashing still messing with his head. And her?” He huffs. “She was still just Stark’s daughter back then. Smart as hell, but young.. hell, we were all young.”

Joaquin leans in slightly. “So what happened?” Sam smirks. “She met him. And from the second she did? It was game over.”

Joaquin tilts his head. “Love at first sight?”

Sam chuckles. “More like enemies to whatever-the-hell-this-is.” Joaquin grins. “Sounds messy.”

“Oh, it was,” Sam confirms. “She was supposed to hate him. Did hate him, at first. But that girl’s got a heart bigger than her damn ego, and Bucky?” He shakes his head. “Man, I don’t know what it was, but something in him just… gravitated toward her.”

Joaquin listens, intrigued. “And then what?” Sam gives him a look. “And then they spent years dancing around each other. Fighting, saving each other’s asses, getting way too close but never close enough. Until finally?” He exhales. “They stopped running.”

Joaquin nods slowly, piecing it all together. “And then the Blip happened.” Sam nods. “Yeah.”

“And she lost him.”

“For five years,” Sam emphasizes, voice tinged with something sad. “And when she finally got him back?”

Joaquin already knows the answer. “He left.”

Sam sighs. “Yeah. He left.”

Joaquin leans back, rubbing a hand over his face. “Okay, yeah, I definitely shouldn’t have come here today.”

Sam snorts. “Told you.” Joaquin shakes his head, still wrapping his head around it. “So what now?”

Sam glances toward the door again, his expression unreadable. “Now?” he says. “Now we wait for the fallout.”

Joaquin smirks, tilting his head as an idea sparks in his mind.

“Or…” he drawls, crossing his arms with a grin. “Let me be the knight in shining armor.”

Sam immediately groans. “Oh, hell no.”

Joaquin raises an eyebrow. “What? She’s single, I’m single, and let’s be real, have you seen me?” He gestures to himself. “I’m a damn catch.”

Sam looks like he’s fighting for his life not to smack him upside the head. “Torres. Listen to me very carefully.” He leans in, lowering his voice. “That woman? She’s been through hell. And if you so much as think about playing games-”

Joaquin holds up his hands, mock offense on his face. “Whoa, whoa, whoa. Who said anything about playing games? I’m just saying, maybe she needs a distraction.” He smirks. “And who better than me?”

Sam deadpans. “You really got a death wish, huh?”

Joaquin just shrugs, still grinning. “Hey, if Barnes doesn’t want her, someone’s gotta step up.”

Sam stares at him for a long moment. Then, he exhales, shaking his head. “You know what? Fine. Go ahead.”

Joaquin blinks. “Wait, really?”

Sam nods. “Yeah. Go be her knight in shining armor.” Then, his lips twitch into a knowing smirk. “Just don’t cry to me when Barnes rips your head off.”

Joaquin falters slightly. “…He wouldn’t actually-”

Sam claps a hand on his shoulder, grin widening. “Good luck, lover boy.”

Joaquin swallows, his smirk faltering slightly as he glances at Sam again.

“He’s really gonna rip my head off?”

Sam doesn’t even hesitate. “Oh, absolutely”. Joaquin blinks. “Like… actually?”

Sam crosses his arms, giving him a pointed look. “You see the metal arm, right? The one that could punch through a truck like it’s cardboard?”

Joaquin shifts uncomfortably. “Okay, but-hypothetically-what if he, I don’t know, doesn’t kill me?”

Sam huffs out a laugh. “Then you’d be the first.”Joaquin scoffs. “Come on, he’s not that bad.”Sam just stares.Joaquin hesitates. “…Right?”

Sam exhales, shaking his head. “Listen, Torres. I like you. You’re a good guy. But if you go anywhere near her?” He whistles low. “Let’s just say, I don’t think they make caskets pretty enough for what Barnes is gonna do to you.”

Joaquin rubs a hand over his face. “Shit.”

Sam grins, clapping him on the back. “Hey, at least you’ll die pretty.”

Joaquin groans. “You’re so supportive, man.”

“Hey, I’m just being honest,” Sam says, shrugging. “And I’d rather you hear it from me than from Barnes- because trust me, his warning would involve a lot more broken bones.”

Joaquin throws his hands up. “Okay, but let’s think about this for a second. Maybe just maybe he doesn’t care anymore. Maybe he’s moved on, and he won’t even—”

Sam cuts him off with a laugh so sharp and disbelieving that Joaquin physically flinches.

“Oh, Torres,” Sam says, shaking his head. “You sweet, naive little idiot.”

Joaquin frowns. “Why do I feel insulted right now?”

“Because you should,” Sam tells him. “Barnes still cares. Deeply. And if you think he’s just gonna sit back and let you swoop in like some knight in shining armor?” Sam chuckles darkly. “You got another thing coming.”

Joaquin clicks his tongue, thinking it over. “Okay. Alright. But what if she actually wants me to swoop in?”. Sam raises a brow. “You sure you wanna test that theory?”

Joaquin hesitates. “…Not anymore.”

Sam laughs, shaking his head. “Smart man.” Then, after a beat, he smirks. “But, hey—if you do wanna test it, just let me know first. I’d love a front-row seat to the ass-whooping Barnes is gonna give you.”

Joaquin glares. “You are the worst wingman ever.”

Sam grins, completely unbothered. “Nah, I’m just trying to keep you alive.”

But Sam knows better. Joaquin will try even after the warning.

…..

The compound is quiet. Too quiet.

You’re sitting in the kitchen, nursing a drink, staring blankly at the countertop. The day had been… exhausting. Between the mission, the confrontation with Bucky, and Joaquin’s sudden presence stirring things up, your brain feels like it’s been through a blender.

And then, because the universe clearly isn’t done fucking with you, he walks in. Bucky stops when he sees you, his jaw tightening. For a second, he looks like he’s debating whether to turn around and leave.

You roll your eyes. “Oh, don’t flatter yourself, Barnes. I’m not gonna run just because you’re here.”

His lips press together, and then because he’s just as stubborn as you… he steps further inside, heading toward the fridge. “Didn’t say you would.” You snort. “Right. Because you’re the expert on not running.”

Bucky freezes for half a second, his fingers gripping the fridge handle a little too tightly. Then, he exhales through his nose, pulling out a water bottle. “You’re never gonna let that go, huh?”

You scoff. “You left, Bucky. Twice. What, do you expect me to just pretend like that didn’t destroy me?”

His blue eyes flicker to you, something dark and guilty lurking behind them. He doesn’t say anything.

You shake your head, taking another sip of your drink. “It’s funny, you know. We used to- .” Your cut your words, your voice falters slightly, but you push through it. “Now I don’t even know what we are.”

Bucky swallows, gripping the water bottle like it’s the only thing grounding him. “I never wanted to hurt you.”

“Yeah?” You let out a bitter laugh. “Well, congratulations, James. You did anyway.”

Silence. Thick. Heavy.

And then, because fate has the worst timing, Joaquin’s voice rings out from the hallway.

“There you are, Stark! I’ve been looking-” He stops in his tracks when he sees you and Bucky, the tension in the air practically suffocating. “…Oh. Shit. Should I, uh—?”

Bucky’s entire posture shifts. His jaw clenches, shoulders tensing, like he’s preparing for battle. Joaquin notices, and because he’s either bold or completely reckless, he smirks.

“Well,” Joaquin drawls, stepping further inside. “This is awkward.” You sigh, rubbing your temple. “What do you want, Torres?”

Joaquin leans against the counter next to you, eyes glancing between you and Bucky like he’s trying to piece something together. “Was just gonna ask if you wanted to take a walk.” He smirks again, looking directly at Bucky this time. “Unless you’re busy?”

Bucky’s grip tightens around the water bottle. You glance between them, realizing exactly what Joaquin is doing. And for some reason… you let him.

You set down your drink, standing up. “You know what? A walk sounds nice.” Joaquin grins, throwing a glance at Bucky. “Cool. Let’s go.”

As you walk past Bucky, you swear you hear the plastic of the water bottle crack in his grip.

You don’t look back.

….

The night air is cool against your skin as you and Joaquin walk side by side, the compound fading into the background. There’s a quiet ease to the moment, but the weight of everything still lingers in your chest.

Joaquin exhales, shaking his head. “Man… I really should’ve stayed home today.”

You snort. “Yeah? What gave it away?”

“Oh, I don’t know,” he says, counting on his fingers. “The insane tension, the death glare from Barnes, the way you looked like you were gonna throw a punch at any second.” He smirks. “Seriously, Stark. That was some heavy shit back there.”

You sigh, rubbing your temple. “Yeah. Welcome to my life.”

Joaquin glances at you, eyes scanning your face like he’s trying to read between the lines. “So… you and him. That’s some real history, huh?”

You hesitate, then nod. “Yeah.” He hums in thought. “And you still love him.”

and you still love him. It’s not a question.

You swallow hard, keeping your gaze forward. “Doesn’t really matter.” Joaquin watches you for a second before shaking his head. “You say that, but I don’t think you believe it.”

You huff out a dry laugh. “You a mind reader now, Torres?”

“Nah.” He grins. “Just really observant.”

Something in his tone makes you pause, and when you turn to look at him, there’s something in his eyes… something unreadable, but warm.

He tilts his head slightly, studying you. “You know… I get the feeling you don’t let a lot of people in.”

You hesitate, caught off guard by the shift in his voice. “Not really.”

Joaquin nods, like he already knew that. “Well, if you ever wanna let someone else in…” He gives you a small, knowing smirk. “Just say the word.”

Your breath catches slightly. It’s subtle- not a declaration, not a grand confession. But it’s there. The interest. The possibility.

And for the first time in years… it makes you think. You shake your head, smiling just a little. “You really don’t have a survival instinct, do you?”

Joaquin chuckles. “Hey, what’s life without a little risk?” You roll your eyes, nudging him playfully. “You’re insane.”

He grins. “You have no idea.”

And as you both make your way back toward the compound, you realize something..

Bucky Barnes may still hold pieces of you… but Joaquin Torres?

He’s starting to see you.

Taglist : (lmk if you wanna be apart of my taglist ♡) @sebbymybaby21 @learisa @julvrs @chuiisi @caity1995 @wintercrows @greatenthusiasttidalwave @natxandra @drop-cherries @sebastians-love

[joostabernichtklein]

Hi,

I NEED a NSFW alphabet

-🪼

-ofc anon, here you go!

⋅ଳ ‧₊˚ ⋅Joost Klein NSFW alphabet⋅˚₊‧ ଳ ‧

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝

A = Aftercare (what they're like after sex)

He's so sweet after every single time even though he's sometimes so tired aftewards he always tries to comfort you in any way. Maybe running you a warm bath for you to relax or cleaning up the mess you both made before cuddling you to sleep

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also partner's)

He loves everything about you, but his favourites are definitely his parners thighs/ass/chest, but also your face. He just loves your eyes a lil too much

For him i feel like he likes his hands just because of you. Maybe your hands are smaller than his so it makes him feel a bit bigger...he also finds it kinda hot. He also likes his hair and tattoos

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He has a runny and not really sticky cum. He would love to cum in you if you're okay with it. If you're not then he loves cumming on your belly or chest just because he likes seeing you covered in his cum. He also loves seeing you swallow it after sucking him off

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

While you were both in your talking stage, the type of one that you just know the person loves you back yk, he would ask for pics of your outfits. You thought it was a cute gesture from him, but he actually secretly used to get off on them. Its the same when he saw you post a pic with you in a swimsuit. It drove him absolutely insane. You definitely have a secret album in his gallery

E = Experience (how experienced are they? Do they know what they're doing?)

He for sure had atleast 2 partners before you so he knows what he's doing, but its still a work in progress. He loves learning about you and your body finding out what makes you feel good

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

he's DEFINITELY a cow-girl enjoyer. Watching you bounce on his cock, seeing how your face twists in pleasure? HE LOVES IT!!!

And he loves the ol' missionary, who wouldn't tho? You don't have to move a finger, just existing and being pretty/handsome, while he chooses the pace? Count him in!

I can't forget doggy style- he escpecially loves how his cum drips down on the bedsheets when he creampies you (it'll definitely make him hard again)

I think it's safe to say he'll try any position with you, and if you both like it, he won't have a problem with doing it again ¬‿¬

G = Goofy (are they more serios in the moment? Are they humorous? ect.)

He's definitely more on the goofy side so he's not 100% serious during sex. One time when you were overstimulated and he instead of answering you got really quiet reaching for his phone, the next thing you know his song BOOM BOOM starts playing on full volume. After he had his laugh he stopped the music and got back to work

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? Does the carpet match the drapes? ect.)

Let's be real...he has a bush. He doesn't really shave but will make sure if you mind it or not. If you do so he has no problem with shaving.

I feel like his pubic hair is the same color as his moustache, something like dirty blonde

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? The romantic aspect)

It depens on the mood honestly. He is a bit silly druing it. When it's your birthday he makes the whole day about you, ofc. The sex would be slow and very romantic. I see him most likely being messy rather than clean. He'd be gentle with you in the start but slowly starts to get rougher toward the end

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

He seems like that kind of guy who masturbates every day ('case of his high sex drive 'n stuff). But after you guys start dating/sleeping together, he's totally satisfied, masturbating only if you two don't see each other for long (which i think he'd tell you proudly)

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

He definitely has a degrading kink- lemme explain!! while I think he'd be more on the dominant side, he still loves getting called someting like a 'bitch in heat' or a 'whore' (tho pls praise him afterwards)

Dunno I can call it a kink, but he definitelly has a thing for thighs- no matter how big or small they are, he loves marking you there (if you want to ofc) and most of all, he LOVES cumming on them, he always feels so desperate afterwards too :(

Other thing that gets him going is praising you. It makes his ego thrive to be the one with power, to be the one to make you feel good with his words and he also loves calling you petnames (some of his favourite pet names and nicknames include: pretty thing, love, sweetheart, good boy/girl etc!)

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Like i already said he's more on the vanilla side he loves the good ol' bed. He also likes shower sex, he finds it so hot. I also feel like he would want try different places for having sex kinda like all around the house like on the couch, in the kitchen, ect

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

It's literally anything that has to do with you. If you're changing infront of him don't be suprised if 5 seconds later he's up your ass touching all over you body. Also being close to you turns him on so much. You two could be just laying in your shared bed cuddling and he just gets hard from being so close to you

N = No (something they wouldn't do, turn offs)

Anything to do with piss or shitting. Anything to do with hurting you or anything with age-play, daddy kink etc.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

When i tell you that Joost is a munch i mean it. I mean this video speaks for itself...so he definitely KNOWS how to work that tongue. He loves to eat you out/give you head whenever he can. Waking you up like this is also a must. He loves when you give him head as well. He finds it both cute and so hot when you try to fit his dick down your throat, getting dumb on his cock

P = Pace (are they fast and rought? Slow and sensual? ect.)

This honestly depens on the situation you're in. If its in the morning he definitely likes to slow and takes his time with you. I can so see him waking you up with either eating you out/giving you head

If the sex is after a show or a long time of you two not seeing each other he's definitely gonna be faster and more rough with you because he's just so pent up and missed you so much

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Again i feel like he's not really into quickies. He doesn't mind them before his shows or before you two are supposed to go out somewhere

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? Do they take risks? ect.)

He's willing to take the risk honestly. When he's drunk he doesn't really care if somebody catches you two in the act. When he's sober tho he would be a little unsure but if he's really pent up he wouldn't mind giving in

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? How long do they last?)

He can get a good 2 rounds in if you give him a few minutes to rest after the first one. The 3rd round would be really pushing it for him, but he would try his best for you ofc

T = Toys (do they own toys? Do they use them on a partner or themselves)

I feel like he wouldn't have any toys himself. If you owned one he wouldn't really mind and some time later in your relationship he would also use them on you or even compete with them. Aftewards he would ask you what felt better

If you didn't own any before you started dating I think he wouldn't mind buying a few just to try them out on you later

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

I already said this but he LOVES teasing you. Even tho he's really bad at it and often when you would beg him do to something more he'd give in pretty quickly

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, ect.)

He's not ashamed to moan or cry out your name, he loves to let you know how good you make him feel. He loves being loud just because you told him how hot you find it (cuz tbh who doesn't love a whiny men fr). He doesn't mind the neighbors hearing you two fuck. In short he's really loud

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

I'm 100% convinced he had a specific wet dream about having a threesome with you and Aggu. You sucking on his cock, choking on the base, while Aggu fucks you in doggy style, making you moan their names prettily.

X = X-ray (let's see whats going on under those clothes)

He himself once said that he's circumcised so lets get that out of the way. I mean we've all seen some SPECIFIC photos/videos, like the one clip from Glassie Water (right?). So i would say he's a good 16,8 cm, 17 cm if he's really hard (6,6 - 6,7 inches) and lets just say he uses them well. His dick is a little bit curved to the left, not too much tho. The thickest of his dick is not too thick but also not too thin, just the perfect one to strech you out nicely

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Let's be real...he's a horny mf all day long everyday. He knows that his libido is high and would be totally okay if dont want to do anything but will definitely give you the biggest puppy eyes after you say no

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Most of the time he falls asleep quicker than you. Before he does tho he always checks on you to see if you're all set and comfy. He also loves to give you cuddles before falling asleep

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝 𓆟 𓆞

-not proof-read so if you see any mistakes my apologies

-hoped you enjoyed reading as much as i did writing this!!

-don't forget to send more asks!

[unhingedangstaddict]

Several Sentence Sunday!

I know I have multiple other stories that I should be focusing on right now but this is where the dopamine was SO anyone up for a post s8e11 fix it x s8e14/e15 spec-ish bucktommy disaster fic with a side of mpreg? because I know I am. here's We've Been Missing Each Other And for extra kicks I'm making this a several sentence sunday post too!

TW: Gun violence, hostage situations/being held hostage, nausea/vomiting

Of all the firefighters in Los Angeles, it had to be Evan Buckley that approached Tommy’s helicopter. Tommy wasn’t even supposed to be working today. He wasn’t supposed to be flying at all. But the entire 217 B-shift and half of C-shift was down with some horrific stomach bug and unlike other stations, they couldn’t just borrow personnel from another firehouse. Tommy had been throwing up that morning, but it wasn’t the stomach bug that everyone else had and Tommy hadn’t told his captain that he couldn’t fly yet. They needed a pilot and before Tommy could say something there was a call and he was being sent out solo to stretch the number of available personnel as much as they could.

Over a hundred fire stations in LA, thousands of firefighters in Los Angeles county, and the one Tommy desperately needed to talk to, while simultaneously being terrified to, was the opening the doors of Air Ambulance Two right now. The one and only Evan Buckley.

Tommy had somewhat of an idea of how Evan really felt about him based on their last conversation in Evan’s new kitchen the morning after they hooked up- that was nearly two whole months ago now. Tommy had confessed that he missed Evan and had wanted to reach out- Evan didn’t share the sentiment-, Tommy had still hoped they could have a second chance and lowered the armor he’d kept around his heart and Evan almost immediately went for the kill. All Tommy knew was ‘this doesn’t change anything’ and ‘I don’t have to have feelings for everyone I sleep with’. That made things pretty crystal clear to Tommy. 

Tommy had no idea how Evan would feel about what Tommy needed to talk to him about. He’d wanted to reach out to Evan again after the hook-up but stopped himself each time. Evan had gotten what he wanted from Tommy. Some closure, a chance to deal a dose of the same heartbreak Tommy had dealt him months prior. It wasn’t Tommy’s place to be the one reaching out. Except now he had to.

This wasn’t at all how Tommy pictured seeing Evan again going. Years on the job, six months of dating, four months after the break up, and almost two months after the hook up and for the first time ever, Tommy was just now running into Evan on a call. Lucky him.

Tommy opted to go for professional with Evan right now. “Firefighter Buckley.” He nodded curtly, ignoring the churning in his stomach that signaled he’d probably be throwing up again soon. He hoped against all hope he could hold off and avoid needing to vomit while in the air.

Evan swallowed hard from the looks of it. “Pilot Kinard.” He used the same level of professionalism, same tone, same gesture in the form of a polite nod. “Hen and Chim are just prepping the patient for transport now.”

“Got it. Presbyterian already knows we’re just a few minutes out.” Tommy told Evan.

“Good.” Evan said.

Tommy looked out the windshield at the scene. Multi-car pile up. Unclear what caused it. Big scene, a lot of carnage.

“Get in the chopper.” An unfamiliar voice ordered.

Tommy wiped his head back to see what was going on and saw a man holding an automatic rifle to Evan’s head, forcing him in the chopper.

Evan looked at Tommy, wide eyed as he got in.

Tommy quickly looked back at his controls and hit a button to send an automatic distress call that went to the harbor-only radio channel and dispatch.

“Close it up!” The man ordered Evan, then turned the gun on Tommy. “Get us in the air, now. Either one of you tries the radio and I’ll shoot this guy.” He gestured to Evan.

Evan did as told and closed the door to the chopper.

Tommy lifted them off the ground without a word. If the circumstances were different, and if Evan wasn’t in the chopper, Tommy probably would’ve been far less obedient. But Evan was there, and there were other circumstances at play so Tommy did as he was told to. Tommy managed to keep his hands steady, and despite feeling panic, he did his best to appear calm. “What do you want from us?”

“You’re my ticket out of here.” The man explained. Over his headset Tommy heard a call over the radio. “Air Ambulance Two, where you going?” It was Howie. He seemed to be in disbelief. So was Tommy.

(read the more on ao3)

no pressure tags for @quintessenceofdust88 @laundryandtaxesworld @typicalopposite @ladyeyrewrites @30somethingautisticteacher @bidisasterevankinard @mustlovelou @agentpeggycartering @salty-autistic-writer @jamieroyjamieroy @loulou-land @desert--moonchild and anyone else who wants to participate in several sentence sunday or motivation monday!

[marielle555]

Astarion. “Fear”, “Power - yuck, you can't” and “message is paramount”.

Astarion is afraid. He does everything he does and wants everything he wants because he is afraid. Astarion is always afraid, every desire he has stems from fear, every “morally condemned” desire so definitely. He suddenly stops being afraid only when he stays: “Just an expandable frail spawn who will burn to a crisp soon enough.” In delving deeper into the topic of “fear” I was inspired by a post I recently read here: “About Astarion, power, abuse and character growth”

I do not mean to offend in any way the author of the post or anyone who shares the author's vision. Fortunately, we have free speech and everyone can express any thoughts and analyze any stories as they see fit. I wanted to touch on some of the topics presented in this post even before, but I found some of the author's arguments interesting and I will quote them, with my own. All points of view have the same right to exist, and everyone can choose the one that is closer to them or seems more reasoned.

If you are an apologist for the UA path and something in my post may not be to your liking, you can simply scroll further down the feed and find something of interest to you personally. Those who are curious to read another point of view, I invite you to click:

The theme of fear has sometimes been brought up before, operating to Cazador's words:

"He is afraid. He is afraid because all he has ever known is you and me, and without us, he is nothing."

Think about it. Cazador is Astarion's tormentor, the one who broke him for 200 years. The most hated creature on earth. Cazador, who also says, “I strove for perfection in all things - even those as imperfect as you.” “I fondly remember your empty boasting, your tired jokes, your endless prattle…” Cazador, who despised every character trait of Astarion, who tried to “fix” him by torturing him for 200 years. Cazador believes that Astarion's actions are motivated by fear, “and without us, he is nothing.” A Tav who agrees with Cazador, a Tav who believes that this is the case, that Astarion can't decide for himself, that Astarion needs someone to “teach” him, what, excuse me, does this Tav continue - the cycle of “fixing”?

Cazador: «You are week, my child. You are a small, pathetic little boy who never amounted to anything”.  - «Astarion does not have a well-developed sense of self, and by default, he also lacks many of the skills that a well-adjusted adult should possess”.- have you seen anything like this?

Astarion needs someone to “help him see the situation through another lens”. A very mild description for simply not helping someone do something they can't do without your help. “Because he is incapable of anything else.” (с) Cazador

“Throughout the game, we help our companions to see certain situations better, and they also help us to consider other choices and paths we decide to take. Now, there is no greater sign of friendship than this. And yet, each of them can choose their own path, without being forced by anyone.”

Well said and true for most of the other companions except Astarion. Lae'zel does need the way of Orpheus, Vlaakith used her like all githyanki, she needs to realize that. Otherwise Lae'zel will simply perish. Shadowheart throws away the spear herself, and she too was deceived in the temple of Shar, she had her memory repeatedly erased, but there is no need to “influence” her, she just needs to be supported, she is perfectly capable of figuring out her own path on her own. The spear is in her hands, she makes the choice. In this case, any Persuasion is really just a persuasion.

She may not listen to you, she has that option. Or you can let her decide for herself. Interestingly, even in my evil walkthrough, she still throws the spear herself without killing Eileen. I know it's just a matter of a low approval threshold there (Shadowheart fans wrote that 40), but it looks like she's really leaning towards that choice herself. Wyll doesn't want to decide anything, but there's no “moral choice” with him either, you can just make everything okay - both getting rid of Mizora and saving his father, then he does decide what he wants and becomes the Blade of Avernus. Gale (in my playthrough) once refused the crown himself, there weren't even line options to convince Gale to take the crown, I know he's more influenced with romance, and without romance the player has to meet a number of conditions for Gale to want to take the crown for himself. Again, the crown is in Gale's hands, and if he wants to do anything with it himself, Tav can't do anything to stop him. Karlach's quest is unfinished, and she doesn't really get to choose anything. She can choose to become an Illithid or choose to die if no one wants to go to Averno with her. Tav can only convince her to go to Averno with Wyll or go there with her on their own.

Astarion is not being used or tricked by anyone when he takes his Ascension. He takes his revenge and takes his own. This is also a new stage, to completely destroy his tormentor, to take everything from him. If we talk about stories, we can find enough stories and legends about revenge, about how an unbroken man, destroys his enemy and thus destroys his past humiliation as well, becomes stronger and becomes victorious. One of the important character traits of Astarion is that he proved to be unbroken, he just hid his identity under masks. Cazador was unable to suppress Astarion's personality, his character, no matter how much he tried to do so. Astarion reveals himself after the Ascension, he acts like the nobleman he once was in the past again. And it looks like the trauma of being humiliated and enslaved for 200 years is starting to heal. There are no police on Faerûn, no therapists or lawyers, but a much older way works quite well there, a way that is reflected in many myths and legends of mankind. Healing revenge. Defeat the tormentor, overthrow him, take everything from him. Astarion sort of erases all his past humiliations with this, when Cazador crawls at his feet like a worm, when he carves the scars on him perfectly, when he takes away his Ascension and Cazador becomes an ingredient. The story of eternal love that empowers and leads to victory is also one of the oldest and greatest stories.

Most importantly, Astarion is the only one whose fate is not in his hands. Read more: Astarion's Choice.

Astarion himself does not refuse the ritual, only if he does not have the opportunity to perform the ritual: if he has not read the scroll or one of the spawns is killed. The test of persuasion is always the same - 18 persuasion and 20 insight, but you'll have an advantage in the insight test if you're having romance with him, that's the only difference. “And I want to live a full life! Not some half existence, hiding in the shadows for the rest of eternity.” -  when the Persuasion roll fails. Not about fear, not about power - but about being able to live a real, full life. "After two hundred years of shit, pure shit, I think I deserve something better."

Astarion - Ascension Persuasion Dice Roll Fail

It's also interesting how, after remaining a spawn forever, Astarion can “be so much more than what vampire life has to offer.” He remains a regular vampire spawn, not even a vampire, with all the problems and misery of that state. It is possible to make much more hungry vampires around - by releasing 7,000 spawns, it can be done. Astarion literally can't make a choice - he can't scar Cazador without Tav's help. The only one of all the companions whose fate is not in his hands (of those companions who have the ability to choose - Lae'zel, Shadowheart, Gale).

I'll focus a little bit on “in terms of lore”.

The Ascension ritual is Larian's invention, there is no such ritual in the official DnD materials, and we can only judge from what is directly in the game itself. In the game itself:

“If he completes the rite, he will become a new kind of being - the Vampire Ascendant.”

“All the strengths of his vampiric form will be amplified, and alongside them he will enjoy the luxuries of the living.”

“The arousals and appetites of man will return to him, and unlike Astarion, he will have no need of a parasite to protect him from the sun.” (Raphael about the ritual)

“I feel alive, hahaha!” = ‘The arousals and appetites of man will return to him’ + ”he will enjoy the luxuries of the living.” After going through the ritual, Astarion ceases to be “undead” and becomes a new type of vampire - a living vampire. This type of vampire is not described in the DnD lore and the 5th edition rules on vampires do not apply to him.

These rules (manias, etc.) were not enforced by the Larian at all, they have their own homerule about vampires. Manias, obsessions and all that stuff should appear immediately after being turned into a spawn. It doesn't happen with Astarion, it doesn't happen with Tav after conversion, the game mentioned a “good” vampire (Lady Incognita, Cazador's niece), Leon, who loved his daughter. No one has manias or obsessions either (Cazador and Vellioth are maniacs, but psychopaths are also found among humans). A rule cannot work for only one and not work for all, especially in the case of a ritual that is described exclusively in the BG3 game itself. But according to the lore of DnD and what is shown in the game, we can clearly see that everything is fine with Astarion's soul and he loses nothing by performing the ritual. Read more: Astarion does not lose his soul.

How did Astarion's author - Stephen Rooney want his story to be told?

"The character shows the value of violence and the dark side of humanity, as well as his extraordinary charm and appeal. This balance is extremely important, as a shift to one side or the other would have made Astarion extremely unattractive or too one-dimensional and empty a character. "

And so too, “evil and fun” are also Stephen Rooney's words about Astarion. In refusing the ritual, there will be neither. Stephen Rooney never said anything about depression, pain and humility or that a player must necessarily deny Astarion the opportunity to live a fulfilling life or he will “be bad”. “Bad ending” is only Welch's opinion. Stephen Rooney himself corrected this by saying that the Ascension isn't Astarion's “bad” ending, it's his “evil” ending. Astarion is an inherently evil character, and in most classic RPGs, including BG1 and BG2, successfully completing an evil companion's quest is an evil act that does good for that very companion and possibly bad for some NPCs or some area, generally speaking, the “world”. An “evil” ending for an “evil” character is the same as a good ending for him. All the facts in the game say so. The UA ending is terrible: Astarion is abruptly and painfully deceived, and rejected. He doesn't expect at first what happens, he's been walking in the sun before, and probably in the back of his mind desperately hoped things would stay the same. So he burns and runs away while the others rejoice in their victory, including Tav, and while they celebrate, Astarion sits somewhere behind the crates on the dock, curled up in a lump, slowly healing his wounds. The sun that Astarion loved so much, and which is now killing him, is in many ways also a symbol of how the “bright world” rejects Astarion as something “foreign.” This bright, joyful, sunny and light world in which there is no place for the likes of Astarion. But it's unlikely that he himself wants to accept that he has to go into darkness. And whatever the “artistic intent” may be, on the facts, it looks the way it looks in the game. And, on the facts, a good ending for Astarion is exclusively Ascension. On the facts, we see Astarion's tears, his depression, his sadness, the way he is forced to adapt to the “good” world, and the way that “good” world deals with him as a result. There is no way to help Astarion in this case, only fantasy and headcanons.

The author of the post agreed that the ending in the docs is excruciating. “It's really heartbreaking how the non-ascended ending hurts: he lost the sun, just like his curse dictates.” Absolutely true. Astarion's fate in this ending is still dictated by his curse. I don't know, really, what significance other events have in this, or what Karlach's scene has to do with it (well, maybe for those, who care about that character too, though they can just go with her in Averno, if that's the case). But the ending is only part of it, it doesn't change the essence of what's going on. Astarion will be forever starving anyway, unable to enjoy the sun he loves so much, to see his reflection again and taste real life in all its fullness. UA even at the party in the epilogue thinks about how to satisfy hunger:

“Withers can pluck fresh wine from all over the world, but is there one bottle of fresh blood?”

“This seems pretty red. But... urgh - no. Not even close.”

AA is enjoying wine tastings at this point:

“Mmm, divine! I wonder if I could get this for my own cellar.”

“Withers certainly knows his wine. Or resurrected an excellent sommelier.”

“Oh, I simply must have this one. It's practically sanguine.”

“Hmm. Well, they can't all be winners...”

Maslow's Pyramid. Basic Needs. Helping Astarion Ascend means helping him become alive again. This is the most important thing, not even power per se. A starving person will never care about any “personal growth”, personal growth is the privilege of the well-fed. With all the pleasures of life now available to Astarion, he has much more opportunity for personal growth. The first thing to do is to heal physically. This is logic and facts, unlike “home psychology” and any “messages”, facts and actual physical condition will always be more important than any words. With all the joys of life now available to Astarion, he has much more opportunity for personal growth. No one will be made happy by the constant torment of hunger, not being able to see the sun, and other torments of the “spawn forever” state.

I don't mind any headcanons on how things can be made better for UA in the future. The DnD lore is full of stuff and you can come up with any adventure you want. Only the game doesn't have that. As it is, you can make up anything you want. For an AA headcanon about how Astarion and Tav will be happy and how Tav will help Astarion heal his injuries, you just need nothing - just for Tav to have their own voice and their own lines after the epilogue. And that, of course, will happen. Ok, the bride is not the equal of their creator, and directly, they won't have powers like the Ascended Astarion has. So what? Why do I need them, these powers? For example, I have Tav, a level 12 warrior, who can run around the battlefield like Homelander on steroids, jump on the heads of enemies and scatter them so that they fly in all directions. As a warrior and will further pump her epic level. The possibility of being together with Astarion forever, the eternal connection with the most beloved person - that's important, the way he feels, the possibility for him to live a full life - that's really important, that's the most important. Who is equal/not equal to whom is a matter of roleplay, whether to bother with this nonsense at all or not. Consort status fits perfectly with the roleplay of a strong character. A strong character is capable of strong feelings. A strong character is capable of understanding their beloved, for a strong character the most important thing is that their beloved is happy, the character is therefore “strong” because they have their core, they don't need to prove their strength to anyone. A strong character doesn't care at all about all these “statuses”, about all these social constructs, about whatever other people's dogmas are. To love is to not let Astarion be hurt again.

The game's entire “inequality” is built on the fact that the player character is canonically a submissive, and Tav likes it that way. Not even Astarion is categorically dominant (though he fits and likes that role), but Tav is a priori submissive. Tav basically can't tell Astarion that they don't want to play the role, there are no such lines. There's no way to react to the narrator's line about “you like to degrade yourself” - it's the only check in the game, passing it gives no additional lines or options. There are no lines about Tav wanting other kisses, etc. Astarion sees the Tav-submissive in front of him, who actually enjoy it, and behaves accordingly. Yes, it violates the principles of RPG play, but Larian wanted to include a variety of romance options, and there are mods for your own roleplay.

“He probably will not have a long life as a vampire lord (look at those who preceded him, they lived relatively little due to power struggles), he will live surrounded by enemies, and will have few sycophants and slaves, no real relationships, a life without learning, without news, just… more power games until he is killed by someone, or live fighting not to be killed for being yet another cruel vampire lord…” Etc. He already has a real relationship (read more: “Astarion loves Tav”). And afterwards, they'll be even much stronger, because Tav won't have scripted restrictions on lines and behavior. Any AA chatbot proves that. Personally, I even like to play with chatbots with an initially “abusive” anti-AA narrative, the more interesting it is to “break” that narrative, give Astarion the love he needs and see how much better he starts to feel. You can break that narrative with a single posting, and set personal records if you want to. Any game with Character. AI with the Ascended Astarion ends (or continues) with a real, deep, loving relationship. Even the argument that the AI adapts to the user doesn't work here - play with the chatbot Ramsay from Game of Thrones, for example, and you'll see what a real aggressor is. Astarion's character itself, his core personality is not suitable for making him an “abuser”. You can only get an “abuser” with him if you know how to “write properly” for it, any roleplay of a loving character, if you just write “from yourself”, without any roleplay, and be yourself - it leads to a beautiful and touching deep romance anyway.

About all sorts of dangers - the world in general is a pretty dangerous thing, and Astarion's powers are growing and he has quite a few advantages over everyone else. And as if the Spawn wouldn't have enough enemies… Astarion is a vampire in any case. Plus, Ascended Astarion isn't alone, he has quite the battle consort, who somehow managed to deal with Elder Brain and many other wonderful bosses. Astarion and Tav have handled it all - they'll handle other vampires and all sorts of paladins, especially since the couple's powers are only going to grow. The citizens of Baldur somehow didn't try to do anything about Cazador, including the nobles who probably knew about him, and the same will be true of the new Lord, but with the Spawn - they'll probably try to do something. “Good people” - they are like that, few people will want to go against the Lord, but, when the feat of UA will be forgotten, the attitude to him will also change.

Tav can help Astarion rise in power, becoming his “gray cardinal”, right hand and advisor. Improve the castle's defenses, making it impregnable, train troops, make the Lord's real coffin safe and install a fake one. The Vampire Lord does not die if he is killed, but turns into mist and flies to his coffin to regenerate. You can only kill him by taking him out of the coffin (which we did with Cazador). If you make a bunker-type room, where you can get in only by leaking through a narrow slit in the fog form, almost invisible in the wall - there will be a real coffin of the Lord. And the fake coffin will be where it can be found if the enemies managed to get into the castle (for example, at the place of the Cazador's coffin). And stuff it with something as deadly as possible, so that those who opened it would accept death. Then, even after a fight with a strong enemy, Astarion will have time to regenerate and fully recover his strength. Magical crystals with surveillance and traps in the passageway leading from the sewers to the castle, cooperation with the Guild to have dirt on anyone and everyone, occupy the niche of arms trading that was vacated after Gortash's death, properly manage gold by acquiring assets and investing in successful businesses in the city to have a stable passive income, and much more - Tav will have something to entertain themselves in between organizing balls and receptions. And if that's not enough - you can just make an evil ending, use the Absolute armies for your own purposes, kill some deity and give their sphere to Astarion.

And yes, to the talk of gods and “ power is not allowed, power is bad”. For some reason, Mystra is allowed. She herself was a mortal woman before and was given the god's sphere. There are enough deities in DnD lore, who were mortal and took the power. They're all allowed. You can't. Who benefits from you being “not allowed the power”? Only those who have it and want to keep their power. In the world of Faerûn, they are gods, local dictators, each with their own morals and rules. To prove to you that “you don't need guns”, that the rational desire to be able to defend yourself is all about “fear” (the illusion of a “safe world” usually works until the first danger encountered), who benefits? Only those who want to rule and dominate you themselves. A character with BFG is not easily “taught” how to behave, what to say, what to think and what to do. “Good, Bad, I'm The Guy With A Gun” is the most playable alignment for me.

Regarding fear - let's look at Astarion's reaction to the Illithid player.

Astarion's reactions to the illithid-player (Ascendet/Spawn)

In which case does Astarion feel fear and in which case does he not? Ascended Astarion tells Tav to his face everything he thinks, but he is not afraid of them (he may even offer to live in his palace). UA thinks the same thing, but is wary, afraid, talks so as not to offend, not to anger, but is not particularly eager to meet Tav-illithid afterward.

Those who so actively promote the topic of “fear” hardly know what PTSD is. You will never be able to convince a person with such severe PTSD, that they “have nothing more to fear”. The consciousness of a person who has experienced such a thing will never be colored “white” again. They just already know what the world is really like. It's not about trauma, it's about experience. You can't gaslight someone, who knows the truth on their own skin, with the illusion of a “safe world”. And in the player's shoes, when you start to perceive the world as “real”, remove the “fairy tale perception”, and BG3 is not a “sweet” game universe - such a belief also looks too stupid and cheap. It can work on a person living in a well-to-do neighborhood, where everyone is not afraid of anything, does not lock their doors at night, and even when someone in a mask with a bat in their hand enters through an unlocked door at night, they will not be afraid, but will offer them to fix themselves, the masked person will definitely listen to them, become a better version of themselves, and everything will be wonderful and peaceful. Astarion once went against Cazador and saved the boy, made a “moral choice”. He got a year of starvation for it, alone, locked in a crypt. Now he has free will, but not quite, there is also Tav - an invincible hero, an authority on everything and everyone, from whom the companions can not even leave, because otherwise they are waiting for immediate ceremorphosis. Astarion cannot choose exclusively for himself (although he has chosen, he often says how much he needs it when he learns of the possibility of a ritual, he desperately asks for help before the ritual). If “the hero wants a better life for him” (Better? Not a “hero” afterward will experience hunger, not see the sun, and so on), Astarion can't resist it. He can die fighting the “hero”, leave the party (to certain death), or… Say “thank you” for “breaking the cycle of terror”. Ascension is a completely rational and logical impulse. Get rid of the torment of the spawn state, gain enough strength to defend himself in the future, and it really ensures that no one else will be master over him.

I personally don't understand this demonization of the emotion of fear per se. Only psychopaths and idiots fear nothing. If fear is not an irrational phobia, but part of a reasonable mechanism of survival and adaptation in an aggressive environment, it is a very useful emotion - it is our valuable counselor. In RL too, after all, we don't live in a world of pink ponies, and “fear” has its degrees too, the form of “fear” that causes a person to adequately perceive reality, to take measures to ensure their own safety, is a useful survival mechanism. It's worse when it isn't. In my opinion, AA is behaving in this way, he is reasonably concerned for his own safety, increasing his chances of survival. Of course, his fear is deeper and it is that fear, that alteration of consciousness that is a consequence of severe PTSD. Only time and, indeed, the development of one's own strength and power will help here. But isn't UA afraid? He must be even more afraid deep down, because he's more vulnerable, weaker, and we don't forget that he's the same Astarion, with the same PTSD. He's afraid to even take off his mask, to show his true character, he's afraid Tav will leave him. He has even more fears. The rational desire to take the BFG and protect himself and his freedom is the right thing to do.

When I first read in the journal, “Astarion's fate is sealed. He will remain a spawn forever”, believing on the first playthrough that ‘ritual is bad for him, ay-yay’, I experienced fear. First time in the game, since there are no particularly frightening scenes in BG3. Fear as a valuable defense mechanism that warns against taking a “wrong turn”. Fear warned me and kept me from a sudden traumatic ending, kept me from running around happily in a world of pink ponies, thinking that since we made a “good” choice, now we'll be patted on the head, Astarion's quest will continue, he'll heal, and everything will be cool. Then, of course, I played through the UA route for understanding and analyzing, but I was already ready for it, turned on the “detached explorer” mode (but, still, it's pure depression and the most unpleasant gaming experience). Small stress - fear protects against big stress - unexpected disaster.

By the way, after the Ascension, the diary says that Astarion is grateful for the help (quest “Gathering Allies”). Even this small but important tool, which helps us navigate quest chains by showing us, what we need to do and how we accomplished what we have already done, makes it clear how Astarion's quest was accomplished.

Neil about Astarion: «Astarion's spawn is theater (with all the masks, lies and deception still included) or Ascendant (no masks, no lies, just the truth because he has the confidence to push his arrogance in your face without fear)». Without fear.

There's a scene in the finale of Origin of Astarion where UA kills a bound man in the sewers (elegantly dancing while doing so), he threatens the Tav, who abandon him (yes, it's deserved, but threatening nonetheless, it's somehow not quite “kind”). “If I get back and they've killed another gnome, I swear - someone's getting impaled.” (Line appears if he became a spawn leader in the Underdark). Or he becomes an assassin, he likes it, he likes spreading fear, albeit within some “approved” limits. Astarion remains Astarion, only with all the suffering of a spawn.

In the article “Baldur's Gate 3 Devs Share How Neil Newbon Influenced Astarion's Ending” is about Neil's influence on Astarion's Origin Ending. In it Greg Lidstone, director of animation, goes over the process of filming the final Origin Astarion scene. Quote: "Astarion’s challenge wasn't directly related to him being a vampire. It was that he was a spawn, and that he wasn't free," says Lidstone. "He is technically free now. [...] He's okay with being a vampire."

From this quote we can understand, that Astarion's problem was that he was a spawn (exactly a spawn, not a vampire) and was not free. By killing Cazador, Astarion becomes free, by getting Ascension, he stops being a spawn and tastes life again, he becomes not just a vampire, but a living vampire (which is definitely better than being just a regular vampire). Based on this, it can be said that it is Ascension that truly solves ALL of Astarion's problems.

If Astarion's character, according to the canons of classic RPGs, was designed to be “good”, albeit angry, traumatized, prickly, with a hard fate, then his “good” variant of the quest solution would be full-fledged, with a good, optimistic and happy outcome for him, which is not the case in BG3. Honestly, I can't find a single RPG game, where the fulfillment of the quest of a “good” character “in a good way” would lead to the fact that everyone around him is well, and he is feeling bad. But for an “evil” character, such fulfillment of his quest, when “for the world” it's good (although 7000 hungry spawns running around the city/Underdark, it shouldn't be good, it's also quite delusional in itself, but let's allow it), and for him personally - bad, it's absolutely logical.

When the game launched, a hotfix came out on August 11 that removed the narrator's words about rejecting Astarion's ritual: “you are now forever a pathetic spawn, doomed to live in the shadows”. Unfortunately Larian seems to have locked or deleted their forum thread “Patch 6 Destroyed Player Agency with Astarion,” where there was information about this, I wanted to quote it more precisely, but you can't read that thread, perhaps it was done because there was somewhere around 60 pages of outrage from players, including posts by SA/DA survivors, who got PTSD from these “kisses” on top of that. Larian generally tried to improve the UA path with small fixes, perhaps trying to soften their original intent. What were the disgusting, mocking the Astarion's pain, companion lines in that scene (were for a long time, only changed in patch 7). Epilogue (patch 5) - Astarion looks happier in the romantic epilogue, a UA fan favorite quote from there is “I'm happy”. In the non-romantic epilogue, you can learn a lot more truth about his condition. You can perceive it as Astarion being much happier in his relationship with Tav, but also Astarion's fate is only truly concerned for the most part with those who romance him (and even if it's concerned without romance, there's nothing there at all to prevent Ascension, even the haters were lashing out exclusively at those who romance AA). I don't want to be a conspiracy theorist, but it's a bit like “yeah he's happy, he's happy, it's a good ending, here's a bone for you,” because not everyone wants to take the “preachy goodness” with the need to send Astarion into darkness so that “good people” can feel good about it. That's why the copium is needed.

“More than that, he shows us very obviously how much he despises all vampiric behavior, how much he misses his pre-transformation life and the simple things (mirrors, the taste of wine, the sun, etc.), and mainly how much vampirism cannot be romanticized…”

Of course, Astarion wishes to regain the opportunity to live a normal life again - the mirrors, the taste of wine, the sun. Not to suffer forever because “just like his curse dictates”. And on the theme of “he shows us very obviously how much he despises all vampiric behavior” Astarion says in Act 2: “Of course I envy him. Why wouldn't I?” “The problem with what Cazador has done is that he did it to me.”

Astarion: "After 200 years of pure shit.." - camp scene | Act 2 | Baldur's Gate 3 #bg3 gay romance

And in this scene, Astarion also refers to himself as “little vampire on the winning side” (responding to Tav's line, “Raphael said it was lethally diabolical.” Astarion playfully replies: “Doesn't it sound delightful? For the lucky little vampire on the winning side?"). And after the ritual, with full confidence, “Please, darling, you have the Vampire Ascendant on your side. How could we lose?” UA has a heartbreaking line: “I'm still nothing, aren't I? Just an expandable frail spawn who will burn to a crisp soon enough.” That pretty well characterizes Astarion's attitude towards his vampirism. And Astarion suffered because Cazador used him as a tool, forcing him to do what he did. It's not about vampirism at all, it's about slavery. Astarion's victims didn't know he was a vampire, Astarion never said anything about anyone “sexualizing him as a vampire”. Oblodra certainly makes you want to break her jaw with a punch from a swinging fist (alas, there's no evil roleplay in this scene and you have to refuse too politely), but that's primarily because of the demeaning way she allows herself to talk to Astarion, treating him literally like a slave. And Astarion's disgust for her is due to the smell of her vile blood. But okay, I'll leave the topic of “sexualization” to the sexualizers, let those who know about it deal with it. I fall in love with Astarion not because of race or “species affiliation” (vampires are rather a separate species higher up the evolutionary food chain than the homo species, to which most representatives of other intelligent races of Faerûn can be conditionally referred). And this species has its own physiological features and needs - and this is already really important, unlike any “sexualization”. And after Ascension Astarion is cured of all physiological problems related to vampirism, he becomes actually a human with vampiric abilities, even bloodlust will no longer torment him. It's not just about survival for Astarion - it's about life in general, and the possibility of a normal, fulfilling life. And here's how Astarion gives thanks for helping him find that possibility:

Ascended Astarion Thanks Tav for Everything | Baldur's Gate 3

I don't know where in the game the dialogs where Lord Astarion kills companions without any problems (probably the same place as “society knowing how to differentiate spawn from vampire lords” and the charity fund with blood for all spawns, though society can certainly tell the difference - the Lord will be feared, and the spawn can be chained to the sidewalk). Astarion wants to keep an eye on his former companions, and that's reasonable too. Lord Astarion gave me disapproval when I decided to turn Jaheira over to Sarevok, even though I wanted to do it purely for his safety in order to eliminate a potential threat. And why should Astarion care about the opinions of random companions, with whom we'd been brought together by a common misfortune for a period of time? They are not his friends, there is no special friendship or bonding in the game. Astarion only needs one person he can truly trust. “I have one person who trust me completely. That's enough for me.” - that's his answer to Karlach.

“That is the beauty of the character, his story, his achievements, and that is the message he has to convey.” The message is what is paramount. Not Astarion's well-being, not the facts of the game, not his physiological state, not his pain, not his depression in the UA route, but the message.

Sometimes I think that Larian tried to “sit on two chairs”, they introduced into the plot what the audience of “messages” likes - the opportunity to “preach” and read all sorts of “messages” about “power, ew, bad, you can't”, but all this as if “on the surface”, not in the plot itself, - you can make up, there is something to catch the preachers of this or that, but other players - fans of classic RPGs can perfectly see the essence, see what is really happening. That's why BG3 remains a good game, yes, you have to use mods to make it almost perfect. Because if these “messages” weren't far-fetched, but actually stitched into the plot and story, none of us would love this game (I mean AA fans) or play it. It's like the “love triangle” story with Halsin, where we can only see that Astarion is feeling bad if we are able to see it. Players write about his nervousness, about how obvious it is that Astarion is putting up with this because of his affection for Tav, about how fake his approval of it is. “So obviously fake that I can't get how anyone can take this at face value.” But it will only be obvious to the player, who understands Astarion, who feels him, who is able to see that obviousness. When there is no literal explanation. And someone, who is unable to see or is too eager to promote their hook-up culture, will perceive or describe it differently. Also, just like the UA path - on an empathy level it's just played as pain. It's the worst experience I've had in all my play experiences in various games that I can recall. But if you take Astarion as a “message”, as a character in some literary work (an RPG is not a book, and the script for a good RPG will be different from a ordinary literary work) when it's solely important what that “message” carries, then everything will be fine.

Sure, I'd like to see RPG games with logic, compelling story and roleplay, not “messages” and “preachy”. But even in presenting the ending of UA as “good” there is logic, consistent with the logic of RPG games. “Good” this ending is not for Astarion but for the “world” and the notional “good”. Astarion is “neutralized” for this “good world”, he is forced to suffer while these “good people” will smile at the sun. There is an opportunity to “saw off the fangs” of Astarion and make him safe for the world. But Astarion is an evil character, so he has to catch fire and run off alone. Tav is part of the world, for whom Astarion must be neutralized. “Spawn Forever” is a poorly completed quest for an evil companion, even the diary entry looks like that. Ascended Astarion is “evil and fun.” It's a happy sunny ending that both feels and plays beautifully. An “evil” ending for an “evil” character is a good ending for him. And that's the way it is in all games of the RPG genre.

[renguro]

Now that S2 is almost over, I wanted to finally get out that post talking about all of the insights and things I did, learned, or other fun stuff about the countdown pieces I made. I still have something in mind for the S2 finale, so maybe if you read (or skip) to the end I'll have a preview for you?

Oh god here we go One day I was coming home from work and decided to check how many days there were until the new season released and I found it was 7 days. So I did all of these in 7 days. Literally everyone was worried about me because I did nothing but draw for those 7 days.

... Except for when I went back to work. I worked I came home and then drew until I literally couldn't anymore lmao. I remember being dazed and exhausted after the Clock Keepers and my dad came up to my room literally right as I finished and asked, "Have you gone to sleep?" And I said, "NOPE! :D" I was living on energy drinks

I'm also 90% sure this started the "ren you're doing too much you need to chill the hell out" thing with me and my friends now

When I was doing these, I had only read the first ten volumes of Hanako-kun at the time, so I was stopped right in the middle of Picture Perfect. I had the second box set, but I just hadn't gotten the time to read it since I got it for Christmas. That means I didn't know Shijima's full deal, and I didn't even know Hakubo's name, so I was winging it hard.

All of the full pieces are linked by clicking their names :)

NO.7 HANAKO

You can tell from the speedpaint I was struggling hard with the pose lmao. I honestly felt like the one I chose was a cop-out and didn't feel energetic enough, but the time crunch got me. At this point, I was also really unsure about how I wanted to treat the colors, because I'd only just started dipping into seriously studying how Aida does it. So many references. And him wearing basically all black didn't help I wanted to scream. I was TRYING to keep everything as solid colors without falling back on overlay and multiply layers, but I got desperate. Still looks pretty good I think.

My favorite part was probably the hakujoudai and the detailing on his collar/shoulders! If I were to edit anything, I think I'd put more on the bottom half of the background because it feels a touch empty. kinda killed it on this pant leg and his hat tho

NO.6 HAKUBO

Like I said, I had no idea who Hakubo was. For the first half of things, I couldn't even find his name, I was just calling him "Shinigami-sama..." I wasn't going to go trampling into spoilers just for references either, so I was freaking out on what to do for the background. All I knew was that there was something to do with lotuses or bugs, and already having an idea of where I'd take Tsuchigomori, I took the lotus route. I uh also hope I didn't make his face too feminine. I don't know why but when drawing male characters who are larger or more built (even if it didn't turn out obvious in this piece) I somehow keep making them look like butches.

Shading his hair was the most fun part out of all of this, I usually never draw characters with hair as short as his, so it was a fun challenge! I'm also just a sucker for kimonos and flowy clothes. He was probably one of the most fun ones for me, even if he was so early on. I LOVE the texture I got on the skull. (even if it's technically too small.)

NO.5 TSUCHIGOMORI

Tsuchigomori onwards ALL used this sticky note full of thumbnails I drew at work for reference. Yes that is a note next to him that says + cuntier. He was also drawn on the same day that I did Hakubo, so I managed to buy myself some extra time.

I was so excited for this one because I could see it so well in my mind's eye, until I realized how many hands I'd need to draw. And then I sucked it up and locked in because I love Tsuchigomori. I'm so pleased with how I worked in more of the blues into the shading and his hair. It was at this point that I think I was understanding how I wanted to take the colors for all of these pieces! I enjoyed doing the fun trick I learned with the weave on his sweater and the spiderwebs where I drew a thick like and then erased the middle. Nearly forgot the markings on his forehead too lmao.

I wonder whose black book he's reading?

NO.4 SHIJIMA

Oh Shijima. I truly had zero real clue about her, and I managed to dodge spoilers about Mei even when I was looking up references. That's why she's painting using her paintbrush clone haha. It's still cute though, so I'm keeping it. Her hair kept giving me trouble because it's the kind of hair you draw and don't really realize just how big you're drawing it until you have to fix it. Actually, I'm having that exact issue on what I'm working on right now, and I'll fix it after I take a break.

I dug up a comment I made while I was working on it and I still stand by this.

There's also something a little odd about the positioning of her chin that I was too exhausted to fix, and I SUPER fudged the coloring on her hair. Also I really didn't know what to put in the background OTHER than the atelier, but I can't really draw buildings! So uh! The exhaustion was beginning to set in after 3 days of this. (Since Hakubo and Tsuchigomori were done on the same day. I didn't keep that time advantage for long though.)

think i fudged it okay, though.

NO.3 MITSUBA

I was struggling on Mitsuba some because that thing where you see/read something and then forget about it only for it to arise as something you think you did happened. That pose I thumbnailed on the sticky note was WAY too close to the official Hell of Mirrors standee/art. Luckily I contain extreme Mitsuba bias (shocker) and I was able to figure it out. I had a ton of problems shading his coat just like I did with Hanako. It's so hard to keep things from melding together when you've mostly got them wearing black.

It's an odd thing to be proud about, but I feel I did the best on the.. Legs of his pants, the chains and lockets, and the eyes and teeth on his jacket. That and the ribcage scarf. I'm really disappointed in myself for the background and his hair, if I'm being honest. I wanna fix his eyes. I STILL haven't figured out his hair either too. Which makes me even more surprised that my friends said, ren, your bias is showing on this one because I was like IS IT??? ARE YOU CERTAIN?

his hand turned out nice too and did i mention i had fun on the ribcage

NO.2 YAKO

I sketched the first initial draft for Yako on the same day I drew Hakubo and Tsuchigomori, but when it finally came time to sit down and draw her? I realized there would be so much empty space where I couldn't have fun with colors and it'd just be the white back of her kimono, so I turned her around and scrapped the idea of her fox form curling around her. I couldn't fit fox Yako in, and I'm STILL kind of bummed about that.

The flow of her hair was so much fun to figure out, as well as the patterns on her kimono. I'm really happy with the background, combining the aspects of the Misaki Stairs' original version and the one after she's been removed from her seat with the spider lilies. The lilies themselves are a little fudged if you look too close, so... Don't look too close? :3

loved the kimono. every bit. can't believe i had her turned around.

NO.1 AKANE/MIRAI/KAKO

MY FAVORITE PART ABOUT THIS WAS THE COGS IN THE BACKGROUND SORRY AKANE'S FACE BOTHERS ME I NEED TO FIX IT ONE DAY HE LOOKS TOO OLD I WAS LOSING MY MIND AND THE EXHAUSTION WAS KILLING ME IT BEGAN MY HATE OF DRAWING AKANE'S HAIR BECAUSE *GESTURES VAGUELY*

Uh okay some good things to say about this one... The colors were a ton of fun to figure out how to place, and I think I at least did a good job on that part. Shading gold things is always really fun! And at least Akane's ponytail was fun to make flow, I was riding the high from Yako's hair here. I think I got a lot of that fun flowy movement in here, which I'm pleased about. This was another one that my friends say turned out the best, again that I'm ??? about.

these cogs are my everything

FINAL THOUGHTS + EXTRAS

All of the kanji's colorings for their numbers were taken directly from the anime! I don't really wanna get rid of that fun reference even if in like, Tsuchigomori's case the colors are REALLY different from the main piece.

Most of the first day was spent on, Hanako of course, and then setting up the frames for everyone else to go into. I spent money to get the patterns to go on the colored part, actually. Constraining everyone to the frames helped a LOT in terms of balancing myself and made it fun to choose what elements would stick outside of them. If I pushed for entire full backgrounds, then I would have been doing even worse.

I was on the ropes at the end. I was half dead and drawing like I was possessed. And the catharsis of it being done and it all looking acceptable just. Ough. I don't know if I'll ever have a high like that again. There's an evil, evil part of me that says, ren! redraw all of them for s3 under the exact same constraints! And shit I might but I'll complain about it. I think it's more likely though that I go back and doctor them up some so I can print them as standees. Probably just for myself, but I do want to build a stock for artist alleys.

I had so, so much fun overall even if it was so much it really could have put my already bad health in more danger. I learned so much about coloring, lineart, framing things, and I really attribute my gauntlet to the explosion in my art progress. That, and my sheer adoration for this series. Am I rambling? I just love TBHK. It's only been 5 months since I first discovered it and it's done so, so much for me.

Even if you went and scrolled through all of this nonsense, which I don't blame you for, here's a little preview of what I'm trying to finish by next week for the finale.

I can't believe we're on the final episode! It's so close now, and it keeps flooring me how little time has really passed. I'll try and push to get SOMETHING else done before then, but we'll see. I've got so much I want and have to get done.