#posting art at an earlier time than usual? in my blog?? it’s more likely than you think.

[cable-salamder]

Incoming Breaking News: Geo “[I’m] not exactly a skilled warrior like you” Finder decks two wolf warriors with a giant metal chair and most definitely wins the fight. More at six

[drtanner]

You know, I think I'm starting to understand why the sharing culture on this site is such dogshit now.

As I mentioned earlier in the week, I spent several solid hours going through my art and writing tags as far back as 2012 and manually deleting everything I found, including all of my own reblogs, because I don't expect my opt out from having my blogs' data scraped to be honoured, and seeing the difference in the way people interacted with my work back then and the way they interact with it now (or the way they don't interact with it at all, more specifically) was deeply and tragically enlightening.

tl;dr, despite having had a fraction of the followers back then that I have now, as well as being an objectively better artist and writer than I used to be 10+ years ago, my work travelled further and people engaged with it more, and they also sent me asks with drabble prompts and questions about my OCs all the time, whereas none of that happens at all anymore. This place was a lot more communal back in that pre-2016 era and generally a lot more rewarding and fun.

There's been plenty of posts going around over the last few years begging people to reblog because that's how this site works, but every one of those posts always winds up lousy with people saying they just click "Like" on things because they like them but not enough to put them on their own blog, or because they don't want to clutter their blog, or because tagging things is too much effort or whatever, and I'm noticing a pattern. There's something that all of these common responses have in common:

All of these people are wholly concerned with themselves and the way their blog looks, or what their blog is supposed to be for, or some other similarly entirely self-centred point of focus.

Listen. Other people have already tried to explain to you that that's not what this place is about or what this place is for or that you can make as many sideblogs as you want if you're trying to curate something specific, and they've had little success in emparting understanding to you, so I'm going to try a different approach.

Here are ten (10) benefits of reblogging that will make this site more fun and engaging for you, personally! ( b ._.)b

You get to keep the thing for yourself, but you also get to pass it along for other people to play with, too! Best of all worlds. How often do you get to keep a thing and share it?

Look in your Activity after you reblog something you enjoy to find other people who like the same things that you do! This is a terrific way to find new people to follow.

Sometimes you'll make a comment when you reblog something and later find that an awful lot of strangers are reblogging it from you directly for some reason. This is usually because someone else later down the line made a much stupider and worse comment and those strangers are now all clicking on your reblog so that they can reblog the post without that other person's stupider and worse comment on it. I like it a lot when this happens. You can get a lot of new followers this way, too!

Even if you don't have the time or spoons to play with jpegs like dolls yourself, your reblog can put the post in front of those folks who do. Playing with jpegs like dolls is half of what makes this site function; give it a bit of time, and the jpegs will cross your dash again with new additions. As it is with anything you love, set it free, and the love will come back to you one hundredfold. 💜

Look in your Activity after reblogging some art or writing to see people going nuts in the tags. You can also go nuts in the tags if you want; everyone loves seeing this when it happens, especially the artist or writer themselves.

Commenting with your reblog is like raising your hand to share your opinion with the whole room, whereas reblogging with your comment in the tags is more like whispering to the person next to you and keeping it between yourselves. Contrary to what you might have been told by others, both are perfectly fine and good and they each have their place. You can do both on the same reblog, even! Take part in the conversation!

If you're too shy to talk, reblogging without commentary is a lot like parallel play. You're all enjoying the same thing quietly together!

When you reblog things a lot, you'll start to see the same people popping up in your Activity feed all the time. These people are your friends whether you actually talk to them or not.

Stuck for something to say? Point out something you liked about the post! It can be something small! Acknowledging things that make you happy out loud is good for your mental health and also your soul.

Reblogging also invites other people who are doing all of these things to find and follow you!

There's so much to do on here beyond checking your dash and occasionally looking at the For You tab. You can discover all kinds of people and things by making a bit of an effort and having a poke around in your Activity feed and on the blogs of people who interact with the posts you're seeing and passing along! I promise you don't need an algorithm to do this for you; the action of exploring the landscape around you on this website is fun in its own right!

Get out there and see who your neighbours are. 💜

[inevitably-johnlocked]

hey, steph! how are you, like, genuinely? not the small talk. i wanna listen

Hey Lovely 💜🖤

I want to apologize for putting this off for so long... which should be a clue as to how I am actually doing.

Honestly? Not good, but I'm trying my best. It's been... a time. Will put under a cut for those who don't want to read about the tagged items.

TL;DR – my real life is a bit chaotic, and I hide a lot from y'all because I REALLY try not to be negative here since my blog is where I come to be happy AND because I am a very private person, but I try my best to just keep going day to day as the chaos settles down slowly.

I've got some good things coming though, so I hope a week's rest next week when I'm off (and will probably take a break from here too) will reset my brain.

Work has been insane, and is most of the cause of my mental distress for the past few months. From Easter until Canada Day Weekend at my job is lovingly referred to as "Silly Season" simply because of how on-the-fly, balls-to-the-wall our workload is until summertime downtime officially begins for us. Without disclosing too much, it's basically non-stop, long hours for me until one of the 3 break weeks we get during the this long stretch happens where, incidentally because of the nature of my job and the team I work on, it actually gets BUSIER for us.

It actually ended earlier than we expected this year (yesterday) and we'll be "quieter" until the end of September now. See an opportunity, I actually took next week off between the two long weekends because my mental health has taken a severe hit and I'm having trouble just... enjoying things? I'm haven't gamed or drew in a few weeks, and blogging and writing feels like a chore. I literally just come home, file this blog, reply to one or two asks, and then go to bed, and do it all over again the next day. Day in and day out, for 3 months. On weekends I have to force myself out of my apartment because I KNOW I will sink lower if I don't leave.

On top of that, my brain has convinced me that literally everyone hates me: friends, coworkers, family, you guys, my damned plants. I just feel very alone these days and... I'll be real here, I've almost abandoned this blog a few times in the past few months. I feel like I make fic lists that no one reblogs or likes and tell me they're all shit. I post my art and I barely break 20 notes. I write something and I get maybe 2 likes. I can't really answer any thoughtful asks because my mental state's been in the shitter for months. I desperately want to reply to the few sexuality asks I have and I physically can't. Being on my computer – after working ON a computer for my day job for 12 hour days everyday – feels like too much, so I try to limit my time on the blog now too.

I just try to keep carrying on, encouraged by the once-in-a-blue-moon testimonial ask I get thanking me for still being here. I thank YOU guys for reminding me that people still like coming here.

Stressed about money and food and rent just like everyone else, and just getting frustrated at other things.

And finally, my uncle (my dad's brother and my godfather) hasn't been doing well health-wise, and he's being moved to assisted living next week. His health has been declining since Easter, so it's been a bit of worrying time for relatives.

Having my therapist helps a lot. She talks me through a lot of my complicated feelings, my sense of self and ways to cope with my anxiety and stress. I'm talking to her again next week, so no worries, gang. As I said, I just keep on keeping on.

Some positivity though:

I booked next week off to try to just... recenter myself. To forget about everything and TRY to get back to doing the things I love. I will probably take a break from this blog as well during that time to limit my social-media time. It's not ideal but I need a break from my computer, I think.

I go to the gym a lot more these days, which has helped with the seething annoyance I constantly have at work. Usually feel better after it.

And because of the gym and getting out more, I've been slowly feeling better physically, better than I have since before 2019. The break from work is for the mental health, LOL.

I'm getting my hair recoloured next week. Can't afford it, really, but I just REALLY need to feel better about myself again, and I always feel so different when I colour my hair. I was doing so good for awhile. I want that again.

Anyway, I'm sorry to bombard y'all with my complicated mess of a brain. I really do appreciate you asking, so THANK YOU. I rarely get asked in real life if I am okay because I keep very private due to past people betraying my trust. And I don't like seeing people unhappy, so I feel if I tell people about my problems, then I feel I am a burden, so I just... continue existing.

Thank you for letting me be a burden just this once.

[nikki-tine]

Pretty hastily slapped together, but here's a comm sheet for those who were wondering about the prices in my pinned post! I'm a little nervous about taking comms from social media again, but I'm open to it as my family needs the money so often now...

More recently, I've taken to working on iPad - this will be a more common thing as the summer months roll around and it becomes too stuffy to stick to my PC for working on art.

Here's what I CAN do, for the moment:

Cute, simple designs - Pokemon and simple (rookie-level or earlier) Digimon are a strong suit of mine, but if you have a wonderfully simple OC I can work with too then it'll do!

Cats. I loooove drawin' cats! If you have a Warriors OC, chances are I can draw em.

Fluffy stuff overall! (As long as it's simple enough, obviously - Fluff is another comfort thing I looove to work with. This means literal fluffy stuff like fuzzy animals/critters, and figurative fluff like cuddles and tickles!)

Sans!! (No seriously, I funkin love drawin' sans. If you got a Sans I can draw, I will happily draw him!)

Here's what I CAN'T do, for the moment, on the other hand:

NSFW art (This is because a) there's minors who follow this blog - I have to keep that stuff away (and keep them safe)! and b) I'm not ready to take NSFW commissions, and probably won't be a for a while.)

Heavy gore and themes (It's a lot to work with, and it's not something I personally dabble in if at all, so the result would NOT be to your liking if I tried more than likely lol)

Intricate Detail (I have my reasons for this! My wrist has been acting up more often in the last few years and so intricate detail is... overwhelming for me, right now, outside of personal work. It's just not a strong suit of mine, as much as I'd love it to be - it's not quite a part of the art style as it is right now.)

Added notes:

- I have the right to decline a commission if it either makes me uncomfortable to work with it or otherwise is overwhelming. That is to say, if one artist can't achieve what you're looking for then usually that's an indicator to hold onto your money for a bit until you find the right person!

I send the paypal link at the halfway point (the sketch, just before lineart) normally - but if you want to pay upfront, then please let me know. (I don't wait until the piece is completely done as a safety measure to ensure the person commissioning me doesn't nab the piece and run lol)

I CANNOT REFUND ONCE THE COMMISSION IS PAID FOR. The money goes STRAIGHT into family-related necessities like bills and groceries, and I absolutely CANNOT afford to return money when we are consistently struggling to even get food for the house, nevermind commissions. (It's also just kinda mean?? :c)

I am on commission burnout - what this means is that my work may take longer than usual to get done, but I hold to my word that I get it done no matter how long it takes. If you need the piece done as priority, then make sure you specify when giving the details for your commission! (I do best, however without a time limit or deadline to work with.)

As of right now, I'm practically (metaphorically) crying for simple designs due to this burnout! I need something I can just fly through to get done so I don't stress myself out further on a queue that's been waiting to be done for a hot second.

[jerzwriter]

A Time to Heal

Trystan x Carolina

One thing is for certain. When @/artbyainna (IG) comes to bat, she only hits home runs. I have run out of superlatives to describe how incredible her art is a long, long time ago... but she did it again! I simply love this!

Book: Crimes of Passion (Post Series) Pairing: Trystan Thorne x F!MC (Carolina Rose) Rating: Mature / 18+ / NSFW Words: 1,500 Summary: After a rough day on the job, Carolina & Trystan return to her apartment, where Trystan wants nothing more than to take care of her. But in the end, they realize they do their best healing together. A/N: @lexicook74-blog asked for a Trystan x Carolina hurt/comfort fic a long, long time ago. I can take a long time to get to them, but I'm determined to do all asks sent to me :) I hope you like it! Submitting to @choicesjunechallenge2024. It doesn't fit any of the prompts completely, but we can see indecision before he surrenders.

The two flights of stairs that led to Carolina’s apartment were something she and Trystan typically navigated with ease. If she took double steps, she'd be upstairs in a matter of seconds. Sometimes, Trystan would yell, “Race you!” when he already had a three-step lead, and they’d both end up panting before her door in an instant. But today wasn’t a typical day.

Trystan trudged along, inches behind his limping partner, who let out a soft whimper with every other step she took. Ensuring she got upstairs was his only concern, so he did his best to conceal his own pain. With just four steps to go, he thought he was in the clear when a muscle spasm seized his back and thwarted his plans.

“Ow! Ow, ow, ow... ouch!” He cried out in pain.

“Trystan,”  Carolina exclaimed. “What’s wrong? I knew you were hurt, too!”

“It’s nothing,” he replied, trying to wave it off, but his clenched teeth said otherwise. “If the Drakovian press knew I was whining about something so superficial, the people would demand my passport be rescinded at once.”

Carolina shook her head and leaned against the door as she fished around the bottom of her purse to find her keys.

“Does everything have to tie back to some strange Drakovian lore?”

“Usually,” he smirked, placing a kiss on her cheek.

A feeling of tranquility washed over them as they stepped inside. Carolina’s apartment. It was small and far from fancy, but the warm, cozy space always gave them a sense of peace. At minimum, they were pretty sure the floor under their feet would support them. Something they hadn’t had the luxury of earlier today.

“Come,” he said, guiding her to the couch. “Let’s get you seated.”

“Me?” she protested. “But you’re hurt, too!”

“Your hip is badly bruised and you’ve been limping! I still say you should have seen a doctor! You’re hurt. I merely have a boo-boo.”

“A boo-boo?” Carolina chuckled as he sat beside her. “Can I kiss it and make it all better?”

The smirk on his lips and the fire coming alive in his eyes made his thoughts clear, but ensuring his girlfriend was all right was his priority this evening.

“If you’re a good girl and let me take care of you, maybe I’ll let you tend to my boo-boos later.”

He rose from the couch to get Carolina an ice pack, but she reached for his hand and stopped him in his tracks.

“No, stay with me.”

“Lina,” he sighed. “Let me take care of you! You fell through a floor in an abandoned building today!”

“Ehh,” she shrugged. “It’s all in a day’s work. I’ve been through much worse. Besides, you fell through that same floor!”

“I just pulled a muscle,” he said, arching his back. “It’s nothing.”

“Well, mine is really nothing, too. We were quite lucky.”

“Of course we were,” he grinned, placing a buss on her lips. “You’re my good luck charm, after all.”

“Please,” she laughed. “Your life has been filled with one nightmare after another since we met. I’m hardly your good luck charm.”

“Ah, but I survived every one of those challenges, some of them largely because of you, so I’m sorry, Detective Rose. You’re my good luck charm. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to make you chicken soup.”

“Chicken soup?” She queried. “That’s for colds and the flu, not two idiots falling through a ceiling.”

“Yes, but in times of trouble... we go with what we know. So, chicken soup it is.”

An hour later, they sat at the kitchen table, still sore, but full bellies delivered some relief.

“See, I told you,” Trystan mumbled as he bit into a crusty piece of bread. “Chicken soup heals all.”

“I guess,” Carolina smiled but quickly winced as her aches reminded her they were far from gone.

“Are you OK?”

“Just sore. I’m thinking of taking two Advil and then getting into a hot bath.”

“Don’t say another word!” He took their plates and began clearing the table. “I’ll go run the water for you.”

“Trystan, I can run my own bath!”

“Nope! This is not a battle you will win.”

“Fine,” she laughed. “I’ve learned to choose my battles with you. But make sure you add the new bubble bath we bought. This is a great time to start using it”

Moments later, Trystan helped Carolina to the bathroom; her face lit up when she saw what he had done. The scent of the lavender bubble bath wafted through the air, as dozens of little candles glistened around her old clawfoot tub, washing the room in a mystical glow.

“Trystan,” she smiled. “What did you do!”

“I can’t expect you to convalesce in an unsuitable environment.”

“You spoil me,” she sighed.

“And you better get used to it.”

Trystan helped her out of her clothes, becoming more transfixed with each new item that fell to the floor. Carolina was stunning, and he always found her irresistible; but the combination of candlelight and moonlight pouring in the window reflecting on her skin, their shadows accentuating every delicate curve on her body, it left him breathless.

But that’s not what tonight was about, and when he felt his body begin to stir, he deliberately turned away. Relieved when she slipped into the warm water. With her exquisite figure concealed under a plethora of bubbles, his primal urges began to dissipate.

“Ahhhh,” she breathed, as her tension drifted away. “This is just perfect.”

Trystan placed a small table with strawberry-infused water within her reach, then kneeled beside the tub, gently bopping her nose with a bubble-strewn finger.

 “You’re perfect.”

But Carolina's mood visibly shifted when he stood up and asked if she needed anything before he left.

“Leaving? Why are you leaving?” She tapped the water gently with an open hand. “There is plenty of room in here; I was hoping you’d join me.”

“But I want you to relax; you took quite a fall today.”

“Trystan,” she said with an arched brow. “You took the same fall! Now, get in here with me. That’s an order.”

“Well, if it’s an order...” he smirked.

Quickly removing his clothes, he slid into the tub across from his love, letting out a deep sigh the moment his body was submerged. With his arms stretched over the tub's sides and his legs rubbing against Carolina’s silky skin he wondered why this hadn't been his plan all along.

“This is divine,” he swooned.

“I told you! No way was I going to let you miss out on this.”

“And for that, I thank you!”

They closed their eyes, reclining in the soothing waters for a long while; but when Trystan opened his eyes again, he found Carolina’s sultry brown eyes peering at him, a playful grin on her face. 

“Yessss?” He droned.

“Do you have any idea how sexy you are in this lighting?”

“In this lighting?" He said, feigning insult. "I thought I looked sexy in all lighting!"

Carolina barked out a laugh. “That goes without saying, of course! But in this lighting... you’re especially desirable.”

Carolina was stunned; perhaps the candlelight was impeding her vision, but she swore she saw Trystan Thorne blush.

“You’re one to talk,” he whispered. “You’re simply ravishing.”

The lapping water made delicate sounds as Carolina pushed herself up and moved closer to Trystan. This allowed him a quick peek at her luscious curves before he felt them pressed firmly against his chest.

“Then, why aren’t you ravishing me," she purred in his ear.

Trystan thought he might melt into the water. “Lina,” he moaned. “What are you doing to me?”

Her pride morphed into a smile as she dragged her hand up his thigh, then slowly, excruciatingly slowly, skimmed her fingers along his hardened length.

“I haven’t done anything yet,” she teased. “But that’s about to change.”

He let out a muffled growl when her arms wrapped around him, stoking her desire even more.

“Lina, you’re hurt," he said, offering one last out.

“I’m fine!"

“I want you to feel better!”

She pushed back with seductive eyes, just begging to be taken.

“If you want me to feel better... I can offer some suggestions on how you can do that.”

His erection pulsated against her thigh, and she silently lauded herself for her restraint at that moment.

“Are you sure?” he whispered as her hands sunk under the water grasping him at his base, pleasuring him with slow, deliberate strokes until he quivered beneath her.

“100% sure,” she hissed, parting his lips with her tongue, entangling it with his for a long, sensual kiss.

The grin on his face couldn’t have been wider when they parted. “If you keep doing this, I'll see to it that we fall through ceilings together every day."

Carolina straddled him, placing him at her center before holding him tight. Unbridled shrieks of pleasure filled the air as she slowly sank down on him. He reached up and cupped her breasts just as he filled her completely. She closed her eyes, remaining still for just a moment to savor the feeling, and then, with a wicked grin she began to grind shamelessly against him.

If either had a worry about the water that splashed onto the floor, they certainly didn't show it as they brought each other to the precipice of pleasure again, and again until they unraveled in each other's arms.

“I don’t know what doctor recommended this treatment plan,” Trystan said trying to catch his breath. “But I really need to thank them.”

"What, this is how I fix boo-boos?" Carolina smiled.

"Then, I need to thank you."

Shortly after, the couple curled up in bed... completely in need of painkillers to soothe their aching muscles. But the blissful smiles on their faces as they drifted off to sleep made it very, very clear... sore muscles be damned, it had all been worth it.

@choicesficwriterscreations

[ribbonetteart]

Tribute to one of my favorite movies of all time + the franchise that has me in a death grip 💖

a bit late for Christmas but at least Valentine's day is around the corner ^^;;

Process below if that interests you:

AS I SAID EARLIER, I had been working on this piece as early as December of 2021 😱!!!

This was the original sketch! I was inspired after learning about Blaze's own design inspiration coming from Takarazuka theater, as well as it being the Nutcracker season so this film was in bouncing around in my head.

and this was allllll the way back in 2021 ^^; I had put the idea to paper to capture the image in my head immediately. But the idea in my head was extravagant and beautiful and would certainly take time to complete, as well as the patience and skill to work with watercolor 😔 I've certainly done my share of watercolor, both physical and digital, but I still feel like my physical watercolor work is a fluke, and I was still a novice digital artist at the time of this sketch.

In short, I wasn't confident my skill could live up to the vision.

So I would put this on the back burner. It wouldn't be ready in time for Christmas, and I could use this as an opportunity to hone that digital art experience so it could be ready next year!

2 Years Later...

It's December 5th. Fuck it. Let's crack this open again, I tell myself.

SO starting with the line art, it's actually 2 different brushes layered over one another.

I also changed Sonic's expression to be more love struck-looking, because I'm a sucker for romance.

The image on the left is a watercolor line brush, while the right is a pencil brush. The reason I wanted a water color look was because I thought it would make the illustration look dreamy and fantastical, and I wanted that to extend to the line art as well. However, my usual lines on traditional usually veer more towards thick and cartoony from years of studying the Sonic art style, so I really felt like I was working against myself here. I had also asked friends for their input and they preferred the lines on the right as well. If my followers actually do read these blog posts, I'd love if you could comment which line art style you prefer drawing or looking at.

The happy medium was to just combine the 2. Here's a better look at that:

I like it! I think it combines the solid line with the rustic water color grain. Best of both worlds :]

For the actual painting, The most notable thing I can say is that getting the right pastel-y color was VERY difficult to achieve for someone like me who often loves to use bright and saturated colors in her art. I feel like I really set myself up to do one of those "evil art style" or "opposite art style" challenges I've been seeing around. I had to repaint Sonic at one paint because the blue of his fur was WAY too saturated for the style I was going for:

I started with painting Sonic and Blaze in first and then working on the background. I think that's probably the backwards way of doing it but one of the perks of digital art is you can do stuff any order you want when you have layers.

The background wasn't actually as difficult as I thought it would be. I wasn't going for any difficult perspective, and I was using a reference so that could be it. I'm usually averse to backgrounds but I really wanna tackle more of my weak points in art. I actually had way more fun than I was expecting, painting the sky and adding texture to the grass. I think I had the most fun rendering the water coming from the fountain (which you can't even see too well anyway, lol).

Funny enough, I had just about finished painting the characters and background by early January. So why am I posting this in February?

The Flowers...

In case you don't know. I love flowers. I love looking at them, I love learning about flower languages, I love drawing them. so seeing that my reference image showed flowers circling the fountain, I was excited! I was already having more fun than I expected to be having (working against my usual style, rendering a background), so how could this be a pain in the ass?

Well, I am my own worst enemy 😞I couldn't exactly identify each flower offhand from this screenshot alone. The texture of the flowers is kinda grainy, since I don't think the animators were expecting viewers to look too closely at the set piece to use as reference for my lovingly crafted crossover fanart. If anyone has this in high quality though, please tell me.

(I think I actually got this reference from a tumblr post but I can't find it on my blog for the life of me nor can I find it in the tags I'm so sorry)

I'm a huge stickler for details so I really wanted to be as "accurate" as possible in my illustration. I can hardly identify some of these flowers with confidence. I think there are roses in there? or tulips? I'm not sure if those yellow flowers are roses or some kinda petunia or if I'm way off.

I'm sure these details won't matter to most viewers but it was EATING AWAY AT ME. Eventually I decided to try drawing in flowers that might look similar to the ones in the reference. Or some based on their flower languages. I was certainly overthinking it ;;;; It led me to going "fuck it" and just throwing in whatever I wanted. There are no irises visible in that screenshot but I made it the centerpiece of the flower ring. Who give a shit.

I made some guides for me to follow: The blue ring was so I could make sure the flowers make a half circular border around Sonic and Blaze. I was envisioning how it could look as like an icon or sticker or something, which is why it's framed this way. then the second guide is the sketch of the flowers I made. I always do line art and I'm not great at just improvising with color to paper, or color to screen in this case.

The rest of this process is then just working on each flower piece by piece (with the help of the mirror tool of course) with varying degrees of detail. Some flowers are more abstract than others, and I had debated if that would look jarring and disrupted any kind of harmony I was trying to maintain with the style parameters I set for myself. And then I decided I was overthinking it once again which is why this was taking me nearly 2 months to complete.

At some point during this process, my wifi went out for a whole week! Of course, I could still work on this illustration offline, but I had a lot of tabs open with a bunch of reference images on there (plus I like to listen to music while I draw otherwise I lose focus and I had neglected to download a varied selection on my phone or laptop 😭 Learn from my mistakes).

The most tedious of this process was making each set of gladioluses a unique color.

Was it worth it? You tell me! I think they're pretty, at least.

Along the way, I repainted the grass because it wasn't symmetrical (It didn't need to be but I had been using the mirror tool for a lot at this point and it was bugging me). I made other little final adjustments, like color adjusting the leaves on the flowers, lowering the flower ring border, and so on.

Ultimately, I'm extremely satisfied with the final product. I had my heart set on doing something like this for a long time. I had so much fun just experimenting throwing on color or not worrying about technical stuff. Of course, I did do what I usually do and overthink it at some points, but I'm working on it!

I've wanted to do an extremely indulgent AU illustration and other drawings for a Sonic x The Nutcracker story for a long while. I will be totally honest, I'm still a little embarrassed to share stuff like this, even after years of posting fan art online. It feels like the more self indulgent something is, the more people might judge me for it ^^; But I wanna practice what I preach and kill the thing inside me that cringes at my harmless attempts at joy and whimsy.

I would love to do some more drawings for this AU, but maybe post them around December when it would be more seasonally appropriate. I hope you'll stick around for it!

If you read this whole thing to the end, thank you. Whether you follow my blog or not, I hope you have a lovely day :3💝

[guppygiggles]

I had art I was going to share tonight, but admittedly, having my boundaries violated (multiple times, not just related to my post earlier) really sobered me out of my playful mood.

Being as vulnerable as I am on this blog, believe it or not, does take courage. I don't just do it because I want to feel seen... I also do it because I want others to feel seen. I know my art and stories have had an impact on other people, made them feel comforted, and made them feel less alone, because I've been told that... so many times (and honestly, I am still so thankful for and touched by each and every one of those messages). It means a lot to me, that I'm able to do that... that I'm able to make someone's life brighter, even just for a moment, you know? I've been in places where little moments of relief like that, or just a wisp of fluster from someone's art or fic, were all that kept me going.

People outside the community usually don't understand tickling as we do... as more than "just" a fetish, or a kink, or a fixation. For most of us (I do not claim to speak for all), it's also comfort, love, vulnerability, trust... it carries a weight of meaning that can hardly be replaced by anything else.

It hurts to have that tarnished by disrespect, really, it does. And, it breaks my heart to say it, but what I have experienced is mild compared to what some of my friends have had to deal with.

If you're in this community... Please be kind. Even if tickling is just a frivolity to you, please try to respect that it might be a soft place to land, or even a life raft for someone else.

This is a tough world we live in, I'm sure you know that. Think about your own vulnerability, and where you go to let it rest. Do you really want to be responsible for taking that away from someone, when they might need it the most...?

Please take care of each other. I love you. That's all. 💙

[angelgendered]

Can I interest any of you fine folks in a Good Omens Fantasy AU which I'm affectionately naming The Oath AU?

Here there be a vague outline of the some stuff I jotted down earlier about it. It's vague for now but I'm working kn fleshing it out! I'm Working On The Longfic(tm) and possibly other bonus scenes and further adventures of theirs in this world if this hits a mark with folks and people actually read it.

Rambling under the read more! No CW or TWs I don't think...? Let's jump in!

It's DnD style fantasy (but dark, at the risk of sounding Edgy. This ain't the kind of DnD you'd play with a 13 year old cousin, for example. The world is harsh and unkind, and there be monsters in the woods, child. Inspird partly by Discworld, partly by FFXIV, especially the Endwalker expansion, partly by Mtghew Mercer, Exandria and his players and all their side content to do with Exandria, partly by Dungeons and Dragons shenanigans I've had over the years myself, and partly by the worlds Patrick Rothfuss and our beloved Neil Gaiman, amongst other authors i adore, come up with. Its a big mash of inspirations but km hoping to mold it into something coherent. )

Fiendish Blooded Sorceress and Druid Crowley - who can mold their body and appearance from the very essence of the earth and who transcends mortal ideas of gender and presentation, straddling the lines of male and female and both and none. They have appeared as maiden, mother, crone, ancient warlock, youthful child and more besides, giving rise to many rumours about her 'true' heritage.

Human Holy Knight of The Order Aziraphale - who has crusaded for years in the name of his Goddess, only to be faced with a moral dilemma. He was offered a priceless, holy artifact in exchange for a pact with a Devil - this pact, which has left him visibly facially scarred - dictates that he must kil one person, no more or less, for this Devil at a time and palce of the Devil's choosing. Until now, he hasn't been called to do such a thing... And he hopes that the Devil has forgotten about a lowly Soldier Knight such as himself.

Rituals! Sexy and very unsexy ones! There's a lot of this cos I'm exploring my own spirituality lately so. You get a ritual! You get a ritual! Everyone's naked and dancing! There's a fire! It's great! Until it isn't.

Probably Hurt/Comfort AND Whump.

This is an E rated AU bc everything I write has sex in it, but whatever! Maybe some light kink too, but I'll be guided by my muses on this. This is more story than smut anyway - the 'additional scenes' I may do if people like this AU? They'll be dirtier, lol.

I have Pinboards, Playlists soon, and no doubt a buttload of other worldbuildingy bits to come! Along with the fic et al of course. If you're interested I've made a tag on my blog for the AU where I'll try to remember to organise this stuff cos I'm really into this AU and really want to finish a longfic so I want you guys to hold me accountable tbh.

If you're interested, the tag is on this post and it's 'Good Omens Oath AU'. In time I would adore to commission artists for this project of mine, so if you're up for collaborating and will accept payment (I don't do trades usually cos you're worth money! Your time and art is too! But I could maybe be convinced...) I'd love to hear from you!

[currytantou]

[translation] Dear Vocalist Evolve Entry No 6 A’ – Animate track / CV: Kimura Ryohei

also x-posted on my wordpress blog / ko-fi page / commission me! as usual, do not repost or use!! :')

0:03 Hmm, it should be around here… Oh? Oh! Found it~! Extra large sunny side up! Yeah, apparently it’s an artwork slash bench! As you can see, it’s the shape of a freaking huge sunny side up! You don’t always get to sit on a sunny side up, do you? ‘Nuff said, we gotta take some photos!~

0:40 Here goes!~ First off, let’s strike a cool face. (camera snaps) Next, go all out and make a weird face. (camera snaps) Lastly, gimme a big smile! Honey, I love you!!! (camera snaps) Wait, wait!! It’s my duty to check the pictures~

Hmm, hm! These turned out nice! Pfft! Honey, that’s way too much effort on that weird face! But, but! Considering how you still looked cute despite the all-out weird face, I expect nothing less from my miraculous girl. What’s your deal, Honey? A’-tan is getting dizzy over your staggering cuteness attack! So, how’s the last picture look like? Whoa! This is bad!! It’s a problem if anyone approaches you! That’s not true! Your eyes weren’t half closed but you looked right into the camera- whoaa! Well, hmm, that’s true. It turned out nice. Actually, it turned out way too perfect that it captured Honey’s super angelic smile! If everyone sees that, they will fall for you! Therefore, I’m not showing these to anyone! But it’s our precious selfies so I should at least send it to Honey. When you’re at home, you can secretly take a peek and recall your Hakone day-trip memories with Darling all you want!

2:29 (phone vibrates) Alrighty! Let’s get going and move to the next place! This place is bigger than I expected and moving around takes so much time. Since we’re here, I wanna briefly check the whole place but they have an outdoor art gallery and indoor exhibition. So if we wanna see both, we gotta be quick. That said, we can’t stay still. Where to go next? Of course, I’m gonna prioritise where Honey wanna go, so don’t hold back and tell me~! Hm? Which is it? Huh? Soap bubble castle? We have no choice but to go! (clears throat) I shall lead the princess to the castle so your hands, please.

3:26 We are here!!~ Hmm? The princess’ castle is being occupied by all those kids? They seem to be having the time of their life, eh? It kinda looks like a damned stylish jungle gym. Now that we’re here, we too should aim for the summit and climb it! (Honey stops him) Huh? R-really?~ Seriously. No way I am stopped by the age limit after all the effort to reach here. But gentleman A’-tan doesn’t mind letting the kids have the castle if that means I can have the princess all to myself. I am way, way more content with this. (kisses)

Nah, this is basically how overseas people say hello. Besides, everyone’s attention is on the castle. So, no problem, no problem! Don’t mind that. You should tell me if there’s any place you wanna check out. Although I said we’re checking all places, of course I’m prioritising Honey’s requests!

4:48 It was long but I sure had fun!~ Makes this whole Hakone trip worth it. Hm? Huh? There’s no presence at the bus stop…Don’t tell me we missed it?! Ahh…Nah, it’s fine. I checked the schedule earlier and there’s no changes. If we get on this bus, we can easily ride the bullet train and go home. That said, let’s sit down. Honey, I’m sure you’re tired. Since we’ve been walking around the whole day.

I know right. We managed to look around but not take our time. Although, well, I came here knowing that. Yeah, let’s come again. How about we stay the night next time and make it a hot spring trip? After all, Hakone is all about hot springs! Doing it right away might be tough but a night stay might be possible after cd release. I know right! I wanna soak in a hot spring! Of course, with Honey~ No way, of course we should! After all this time, Honey?~

Ahh, a hot spring with Honey….Honey out of the bath…yukata…her nape..!! Ahh!! Ahhhh!!! Just imagining it makes me lose it!! That means I’m booking it on the bullet train ride!! Of course, it gotta be a room with a hot spring reserved in it! This will somehow work out if I put all my effort into it! Besides, I still hold a grudge over the jungle training camp the other day. I definitely won’t let ‘em take captive of me suddenly again!

6:43 And that means, Honey, you should tell me when you’re free! But before that..! Bam! (A’ hugs Honey) Don’t worry ‘bout it~ The bus isn’t here yet and there’s no kids around either. I felt excited thinking about the hot spring trip, so I immediately need your lips, Honey~ (kisses) I’m confident I would enjoy myself wherever, as long as you’re with me. But having you all for myself gotta be the best when nobody’s looking. That’s how our next date plan should be. Look forward to it~ (kisses)

ー

tysm for reading <3 ✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩

[rocksandmirrors]

this is something i wrote a couple weeks ago based on the second art of this post i've made, but i didn't feel like posting it on ao3. hope you enjoy!! the wonderful @sapphic--kiwi inspired me to write this, make sure to check out her blog as well <3 she's a very talented artist and writer

also watch out for body issues and internalized fatphobia

Matt couldn’t stand to see his reflection anymore.

He should have seen it coming, though; with all the work he had been doing for the last years, and being able to eat his fill every day, it was obvious he would gain weight. Yet, now that he stared at himself in the mirror, all he could see was the extra pounds that didn’t have to be there. He knew this was silly, but an immature part of him hoped he could have looked like these constructionist witches in the shows he watched, attractive and shaped like a V.

Grimacing, he pinched a bulge on his stomach and let out a groan. He hated looking like this, especially when he was so skinny just a couple years ago. Maybe he could skip breakfast, just for today. He wasn’t that hungry anyway.

Shaking his head to try and think about something else, Matt reached out to the cabinet above the sink until he saw Augustus’ reflection in the mirror, leaning against the door frame with his arms crossed. He froze as they locked eyes, and he prayed he hadn’t seen too much of him wallowing in his misery.

“Hey,” he mumbled, finally opening the cabinet to grab his hairbrush. “Sorry, did I wake you up?”

“Nah.” Matt heard footsteps behind him, and a few seconds later, felt a pair of arms around his waist, as well Augustus’ warmth against his back, and his chin on his shoulder. “You’re up earlier than usual.”

“Eh, I just woke up and couldn’t fall back asleep. Figured I could get prepared for work, at least.”

Augustus’ hands wandered around his stomach and hips- areas of his body that he hated more than anything- and he repressed the urge to push them away. Instead, he started brushing his hair, slowly, untying all the knots one by one. He had two hours left before leaving, might as well take his time.

“Matty, are you okay?” he asked, slumber still staining his voice.

“M’yeah. Sort of.” When he met Augustus’ eyes again through the mirror, he sighed. “No, not really.”

“I know. I saw you.”

Yeah, he figured as much. His fiance had that talent for always being at the wrong place, at the wrong time. He put his hairbrush down next to the sink, still staring at their reflections.

“Of course you saw me. There’s nothing else to see about me but… this,” he added, disgust dripping in his tone.

“Don’t talk about yourself like that.”

“Like what? Like I became fucking ugly? Someone here has to, because you sure as hell aren’t doing it.”

Matt was getting worked up over pretty much nothing and arguing with a brick wall; he knew that, yet couldn’t help it. Just thinking about the way his body had changed over the last years made him feel miserable and fall back into his old self-deprecating ways, aggressive towards someone who didn’t ask for it.

“You’re not ugly,” Augustus argued, leaving a peck on his jaw. “You’ve never been.”

“Augustus, you don’t need to rub me up the right way. I know I’ve changed, I mean- you’ve seen me at seventeen, look at me now! I was in much better shape back then!”

“Were you?”

“Do you really need me to make an illusion of my old self to compare?” He asked, arching an eyebrow.

Augustus shook his head, his hands still rubbing the parts of his body he hated the most. Matt just wanted this conversation to end, to go on about his day and shove that brief moment of vulnerability into a corner of his mind so he could forget about it. As much as he hated his current appearance, he never intended for his lover to listen to him vent about his body issues first thing in the morning.

“Matt, you had nothing to eat as a teen, of course you were skinnier. Hell, I’ve seen you digging through trash at school just to have lunch.”

“Yeah, but-”

“You’ve grown up. You’re doing a lot more physical work, and like it or not, you can’t keep your teen body all your life.” One of Augustus’ hands moved up to his torso. “If you really want to lose weight someday, I’ll support you, but I want you to know I also love how you look right now, because you’re just as healthy and handsome. Frankly, I’m happy to see you like this.”

Matt’s breath got stuck in his throat, and his eyes widened at these words. He knew Augustus tended to be clingier than usual whenever he lacked some sleep, but he still needed to get used to all the praise that came with it.

“I don’t really see it,” he admitted with a shrug.

“That’s okay. I don’t expect you to get over this right away.” The younger witch left another kiss, this time at the nape of his neck, and a shiver ran down his spine. “But trust me, if you could see yourself the way I see you, you’d marry yourself in a heartbeat.”

Matt could feel- and see- all the blood rushing to his face, and suddenly, the warm hands wandering on his body didn’t bother him as much- they felt loving, tender, worshiping every part of the body he still struggled to accept as it was. He leaned into Augustus, still standing behind him, and the arms around him wrapped themselves tighter.

“Are you feeling any better?” He asked.

“I… Yeah, actually. Thanks, babe.”

“No problem.” Augustus left one last peck on the shell of his ear before stepping back, and Matt immediately missed his warmth. “Since we’re both awake, I’m gonna make some coffee. Do you want some?”

“You know it.” Matt turned around to face him, offering him a tired smile. “Let me make you breakfast, yeah?”

“Don't worry, I’m not touching any pans in this kitchen,” he yawned as he left the bathroom.

Matt watched his fiance walk away, then turned back to his reflection. Half of his hair had been brushed, the bags under his eyes were a little more prominent than usual, contrasting with his crimson face, and his shirt was a little crinkled from where Augustus had been touching him. He pinched a bulge on his stomach again, poking at the fat here and there with a faint smile.

Maybe he could indulge in breakfast today.

[nerves-nebula]

Sorry bout this thing but I kinda wanted to tell my thoughts about your stuff. Im kind of hoping this will get drowned in your inbox honestly, since this is just a really long unsolicited rant of mine.

Sometimes when i scroll through your account and I encounter csa, incest and mentions of suicide in your posts I get uncomfortable but then I remember that one phrase that goes something like "Art should comfort the disturbed and disturb the comforted" and I just feel kinda bad bout myself.

When I was a kid my nannys bf forced me to kiss him in the lips whenever we met. I was 6. It was uncomfortable. I never did tell my nanny about it. My parents are both police people and my mother had long explained the concept of rape and how unconsensual touch is bad and you shouldnt allow that but something prevented me from telling anyone what was happening. I dont know why. I know they would immiedietly jail that guy if they did but somehow it felt like no one would believe me. I never told them until now, then when I was what, 6-8 years old? I cant even remember. Yeah somewhere around that, he molested me when my nanny was few feet away and asleep and for the next 4 years of my life i felt dirty. Desecrated. Stupid. I couldnt even look down at my naked body when i shower back then, but somehow I managed to trudge on living by trying to forget the fact it happened. Its been 8 years since Ive last seen him. Ive told anyone who I knew who doesnt care enough to be friends with me but cared enough to listen about it but my Parents are none the wiser and i plan on keeping it that way.

Also. Im a year away from being legal now. Ive thought about killing myself or just generally not wanting to exist anymore many times since then, cuz lifes equipped with motolov cocktails of "get fucked dumbass" and i somehow managed to get a coupon for at least a million of them.

(I hope that line made you laugh if you read this).

Coming back to the phrase i mentioned earlier, it feels weird whenever i feel something similar to the feeling of being triggered while looking at csa being depicted. By definition, i would be considered a victim, and id of course would be comforted by seeing similar experiences happen to people because relating to something usually induces a positive feeling. I dont. I see your art and it guts me. It guts me and the fact that it does also guts me, because what does that mean? I am supposed to be the comforted? Despite the fact that I was taken advantage of as a child and spent night after might thinking how stupid i was and why I let that happen to me even when I was equiped with the information that makes me less vulnerable than other children? So i do I correspond more with those who are defined as comforted then, was i not disturbed after all? Was i victimizing myself all along? Am I a bad person for thinking i was? No wait, that doesnt make any sense at all. Its all wrong. Why am I so guilty about this? Why am i subjecting myself to this?

And then it repeats.

I still go through your blog because well, i love tmnt, i love your artstyle, i love the way you tell stories, I love how you dont sugar coat csa, incest and other darker topics like body horror, erotism and sadism, i hate how much it haunts me, i love the fact i can relate, i hate how much you hurt them, i love the fact that you dont hold back, i love how you show the ugly sides of healing, i love how you depict how much people can change and struggle. Its comforting to me. Its discomforting to me. I stick hand into the fire knowing I would be burned, then I do.

And i like it. I like it somehow, like taking a nice smoke break when you have mild asthma, but like, better. Its a nice change of pace to feel so conflicted like this, its a nice change of pace to feel anything at all really.

But yeah. Tldr. Sorry for the trauma dump and your art makes me feel complicated. Its neat 👍

lot to reply to here! also, unfortunately for you, i check my inbox obsessively and dont get nearly as many asks as you seem to believe i do.

so firstly, no snappy saying is meant to encompass all of human experience, and you certainly shouldn't judge yourself for not fitting into it. easier said than done, i know, but still. i'm gonna try to address some things here, not gonna touch on all of it, but just know that i appreciate you sitting down to write me this.

(I hope that line made you laugh if you read this).

it made me smile, but i laughed at this, because it's a very sweet look into you writing this. puts into perspective how, even though this is public, it was written TO me. like a letter in victorian times or something. that's sweet, i like that.

and id of course would be comforted by seeing similar experiences happen to people because relating to something usually induces a positive feeling. I dont.

you're making a lot of assumptions here that are kind of wild in that "this thought process was clearly designed by your mind to upset you specifically" sort of way. I mean, would you say this to literally anyone else when they feel uncomfortable or triggered about viewing media that relates to their trauma? There's really no telling what a survivor will feel comforted by and you aren't Doing It Wrong by having a different reaction.

there's a reason i tag it as "csa tw" and that's so people can AVOID it as well as search it up.

how stupid i was and why I let that happen to me even when I was equipped with the information that makes me less vulnerable than other children?

i know you recognize at the end of the thought process that this is not true, but i feel the need to reiterate: there is no such thing as being less vulnerable than other children through your own actions. you can try to equip kids with knowledge that might protect them, but that doesn't make them any less vulnerable.

my dad told me about rape and molestation all the time, but he never accounted for the kinds of scenarios i was actually the most likely to fall victim to, partly because i don't think he actually knew much about childhood sexual abuse, and partly because he was more obsessed with the idea of me being kidnapped and raped/murdered than he was about forms of sexual abuse he'd consider more "mild"

No wait, that doesnt make any sense at all. Its all wrong. Why am I so guilty about this? Why am i subjecting myself to this?

i can't answer that one, unfortunately. personally, i like to feel gutted, it's cathartic to me. might be something like that to you, based on how you go on to describe it, but you might also be doing some kinda self harm.

I stick hand into the fire knowing I would be burned, then I do.

saaaaame. i triggered myself into a breakdown in class once cuz i'd been reading fucked fanfiction before class and i got SAD lol.

Its a nice change of pace to feel so conflicted like this, its a nice change of pace to feel anything at all really.

we are shaking hands over this.

anywho, no need to apologize! i am glad, if nothing else, to provide you with a strange and upsetting experience that is not entirely bad.

I really do adore hearing how my stuff makes people feel. it's like, a solid one third of the reason i do this. i still make stuff that doesn't exist to be shown off but WOW showing shit off and getting a response feels FANTASTIC. like, i'm in your head now!! you have been CHANGED by my ART. it's maybe the best part of being alive.

[bi-kisses]

“Imagine thinking that "bone density" of a twelve year old boy vs girl is going to be significantly different enough for an unfair sporting advantage,”

It… literally is. The difference between male and female bones isn’t slight and 12 year olds are actually right at the point where that difference becomes even more pronounced. Beyond having much stronger bones, natal males also have more muscle mass (which HRT can only reduce by up to 5%), larger hearts, larger lungs, and more efficient oxygen transport during exercise—All of these are pretty relevant to athletic performance.

This transwomen-in-women’s-sports hill that so many of you are willing to die on is beyond unscientific and it comes across as both deluded and incredibly selfish to anyone with a functional understanding of sexual dimorphism. Women losing the right to relatively fair competition is not acceptable collateral for making trans people feel more affirmed.

I know exactly who is sending this and dude I'm embarrassed for you because you're so obsessed with this bullshit. Like it's children playing sports. For fuck's sake can YOU choose another hill to die on? Am I the one actually digging through blogs to cry about the slightly denser hip bones of prepubescent boys and how it's unfair to let them play soccer with the girls? I post on this blog, like, every other day. Usually just to reblog something I thought was interesting. I am of the opinion that sports as a whole shouldn't be such a big fucking deal and YOU deciding to read more into that isn't my problem.

Don't tell me, a woman, how you, a man who loves to shit on trans people, how women are "losing the right to (relatively*) fair competition". You had to add that little caveat because it's already a well known fact that sports aren't actually "fair" at all, hence the banning of (mostly black) women who have more testosterone than others through no fault of their own. Christ.

But forget all that! Since I genuinely wanted to learn more on the subject, mostly out of spite for you specifically, I decided to do some digging. Here are the actual facts about muscle mass and bone density between the sexes, as well as the effects of HRT.

Here's a quote from a Canadian study on bone density, which I hope you find particularly interesting: (source)

There was no gender difference in TB BMC until age 14 or in TB BMD until age 16, when male values were significantly greater. Females had significantly greater LS BMC at ages 12 and 13, but by age 17 the male values were significantly greater.

It's not a "boys strong girls weak" situation, actually, because bodies are complicated and full of moving bits. Girls have stronger spines in their preteens (on average) whereas boys have tougher hips. This shifts and changes. At age 12, specifically, it's not AT ALL significant enough to impact playing at a preteen-capacity sporting event, especially a team-based one. You think having one kid with slightly stronger bones on one of the teams is ruining the playing field??? K

In some countries, the disparities are different between sexes, and there's a growing issue with girls entering puberty far earlier than boys (probably microplastics, who knows). To try and paint it as this black-and-white "boys play with boys, girls play with girls" as if that actually makes things significantly fairer when I, a girl who stood a good half foot taller than my male classmates at age twelve and did martial arts since I was able to walk, was considered weaker competition than the two-heart-transplants boy who was at serious risk of death if someone came to school with a cough? No one ACTUALLY gives a single flying fuck about these sports being balanced.

Alright, muscle mass time.

Here's a Danish study (source) that actually bothered to distinguish between levels and variations in physical activity. And, unsurprisingly, from ages 10-12 there aren't significant differences muscle-wise between girls and boys who engage in the same sports.

For the specifics, check table 3 and the averages it gives for each sex, especially with the standard deviation being much higher than the difference between those averages.

That was all well and good, and again, you WILL find significant differences between different cultures because bones and muscles are heavily reliant on what you eat, your genetics BESIDES sex, and the activities you're participating in. So to reiterate, why is sex the thing we're using as a mark of "fairness" given the variables that ACTUALLY make a notable difference at these younger ages?

I think I've made my stance pretty fucking clear at this point, which is "this whole idea that sex is the arbiter of balanced competition is stupid". But we're not done with the original ask, which also claims that HRT can only reduce muscle mass by up to 5%.

God, okay, so this one was fucking annoying to look into because it's not as simple as a flat muscle-mass-change-percentage. There are different muscle groups that are affected differently by hormones and whatnot, but I couldn't find any evidence that it was a maximum of 5% change?? Here's a review of the last twenty years of studies in the area of trans women undergoing HRT (source). If you're trying to find a conclusive range of possible change in muscle mass, you're going to come up short, because that's not what people are studying here.

Let me explain a few things. The average reported change in muscle mass after about a year of HRT was ~3-6%. There's no accounting for how much of an actual change that was in relation to their lifestyles, because trans women don't actually tend to be professional athletes. These are just girlies who go about their lives.

What am I getting at here? Well, let's say, sure, that average muscle mass decrease was 5% ish. That's from that individual's initial muscle mass to their current. The difference between cis men and trans women, however, could be anywhere from 6% to 20%. The data you're comparing actually matters and the variables at play matter, too. Trans women who hadn't undergone ANY HRT still tended to have ~10% less muscle mass than cis men!

There are a lot of theories surrounding what makes someone trans to begin with, and several studies have confirmed androgen insensitivity to be prevalent in trans women, so you can imagine how that would change their physical development. Just food for thought.

I kinda rambled and got pissy here but honestly I'm so sick of the nitpicking bullshit because no one pretending to give a shit about trans women in sports actually cares about the numbers or the balance or whatever have you, they just obsess over this idea that "failed men" are stealing from "poor, weak women", which I shouldn't have to explain is a stupid and sexist position.

In conclusion: professional-level sports aren't fucking fair no matter how strictly sexed they are, this whole argument is meaningless because transphobic assholes don't actually care about any of these talking points, and general exercise is good for you.

[ddwcaph-game]

How frequently do the characters use social media? Do they post stuff 24/7, or are they lurkers? What kind of stuff do they post? How many followers do they have?

Hey there! I've been sick as usual, plus my computer hates me, so sorry for the late answer. 😅

I'm not sure about follower counts since it would be mostly just their school/classmates, but JM and B would definitely have the most since they're technically public figures because of their parents.

Hmm, I wouldn't say he uses it a lot, but he does post pictures of himself, Rosie, and his pet birds fairly often. He's fairly active in his group chats, but he has a lot of hobbies, so he doesn't really look at other people's posts until late into the night when he's just alone in his room and he can't sleep.

Besides bird pics and his own drawings, he'll mostly post and share stuff of basically random stuff he finds interesting. Funny videos, weird trivia, baking recipes, stuff like that.

Like Wayne, she likes posting pictures of herself with him, but she also sleeps much earlier than Wayne so she doesn't have much time to chat and stuff.

Besides her own pictures, she'd mostly share pics of cute animals, dresses, food, and the occasional religious quote. She also used to share those chain posts that tell you to share them or something bad will happen, but she's learned from Lily ever since. Of course, she still likes sharing the more positive ones, or those asking for help.

It's probably not a surprise that Lily's mostly a lurker. Her accounts would be mostly empty, with just enough stuff so you don't mistake them for a bot. She chats fairly actively with F6E, but she mostly uses social media for her "investigations" and keeping up with current events. If you need to find out if something's fake, she's the one you go to.

JM's accounts are about 98% school related. Posts and reminders about school events, exams, with maybe sharing the occasional post from his parents. He also probably receives a lot of messages from his classmates and other students he's tutoring, but he rarely starts a conversation himself. If there's anything he wants to geek about, he'll only share them in the F6E group chat.

B's closer to Lily in that they don't really post often, but they still like to post pictures occasionally. Besides that and school stuff, they'd mostly use it to follow other popular blogs/accounts (art, video, music, etc.) that they find interesting.

But unless you count Lily's lurking, B might be the one who uses social media the least.

[derpyfangirl]

So I almost forgot to show off my trainer in Pokemon Scarlet!

You all have seen the awesome art @k-chips did for me, but imma post it again alongside general screens screenshots of her:

Trainer Profile: Samantha Weiss

Age: 17

Nationality: Unovan

Favorite Subject: History, Art, and Biology

Team: Tuesday (Meowscarada), Leliana (Corviknight), N (Zoroark, smaller than usual), Loid (Sylveon), Alder (Volcarona)/Cullen (Pyroar), Riley (Lucario), Koraidon, Zorua (Shiny Zorua)

Born in Unova, cousins with White, Unova’s Champion and who is off searching for N (and who is rumored to be missing). Isn’t a big fan of battling, at least battling other trainers. Prefers exploring/ finding new Pokemon/ picnicking. Wants to be a Pokemon professor someday and aims to complete her pokedex. Her hero is Laventon, the creator of the first pokedex. Fiercely protective of her friends, has a soft spot for Arven. A bean, smol bean.

Totally is in love with him lol

Team Personalities:

Tuesday: Samantha’s starter and one of her aces. A girl. Curious and nurturing. The older sister/mom of the team. Friends with Mabosstiff, originally grooming and laying with them while they were still recovering

Leliana: Named for a video game character. A glutton. Bit of a clutz. Loves shiny things; often chases Gimeghouls around

N: unusually small for a Zoroark. Mischievous and tends to pull tricks. Very protective of Samantha, and gets jealous easily. BFFS with Leliana. Often butts heads with Riley

Loid: Named for a character from an anime. A bit spoiled. Samantha’s other ace. Rather serious. Koraidon fears him, even if Loid could care less about him. Likes Arven.

Alder: A cuddlebug (lol). Used to sit on Samantha’s head as a Larvesta, and still does despite being bigger than her. Named for the former Champion of Unova. Thinks he’s smaller than he really is. Talkative and cheerful

Cullen: Named for a character in a video game. Samantha found him being bullied as a Litleo being bullied by a group of Gastly. Tends to wait and study a foe before attacking. Scared of Ghost types. Loves little kids and Deerling- has befriended several wild and owned Deerling.

Riley: Stern and serious. Rarely speaks. The peacemaker of the group. Often butts heads with N.

Koraidon: Sammich lover. Dislikes battle, so Samantha never forces him to battle. Scared of Loid, even though the Fairy-Type could care less. (In the AI!Clavell AU: Technically Clavell’s, but he requested she keep Koraidon for the time being.)

Zorua: A shiny Zorua Samantha found rummaging through her bag one day. A baby, having assumedly only hatched earlier the same day he met Samantha, he doesn’t battle. Refuses to return to his Pokeball and enjoys traveling around in her arms or in her bag. Jealous of Arven and a bit judgemental of him.

Does she alternate Alder and Cullen? Yes. Do Zorua and Koraidon exceed the limit of 6 Pokémon? Also yes, but I imagine you can keep more if they aren't used in battle- Zorua is a literally baby while Kor isn't a battler and prefers zooming around lol

Is her team (and by extension mine) named for Pokémon and Dragon Age characters besides Tuesday, who is named for my cat? Yes and you can't make me change them this is the first time I fully named a team (my first Riolu/Lucario in every game is always named Riley after he gave us the Riolu egg, one of my favorite (if not favorite) Pokémon movie is Lucario and the Mystery of Mew, (and I may or may not still have a crush on Riley and Sir Aaron since I was little), so he is always named as such but everyone else is a new naming thing I decided to do apparently lol)

She'll be showing up in my Scarlet/Violet fics (WHEN I FINALLY START WRITING THEM 🥲)/drabbles/the occasional headcanon (so I can stop saying Player/MC) and in the AI!Clavell AU (again, when my lazy ass finds energy and motivation and inspiration QAQ)

Might make an old blog an ask blog for her, no idea yet.

Feel free to ask about her!

[yaskie]

Another surgery, more Chemo

Dear Friends, I got most of my results today. And I got bad days sometimes. It's been how many months eversince I went home after a year of being in and out of HP, and been into ICU. I am in need of another surgery again to remove water in my lungs as it re-occurs almost monthly because of pleural effusion, infection. Which requires medical attention. I have this occurring condition because of my Treatments,  and tumors are occurring all over my body and some of them are malignant which requires so much attention. My illness was earlier detected and in lower stages, and can be cured(I am praying always) to not advance, but it will take time as to how my body reacts. My lungs has a very bad history last 2018, and lately they have found something on my breast that needs further checking as well. My breasts hurts a lot. Unfortunately, the cost of the surgery and the mounting hospital bills that have piled up from my past hospitalization(2021-2022), have become an overwhelming burden for me, my friends and my family. We are also still grieving at the untimely passing of my niece 3 weeks ago. They have already exhausted their savings and are struggling to make ends meet. And also I've been a breadwinner of my Family for a very long time. They depend on me financially.  Weekly Treatments are costly for me too as well. As we have a very bad healthcare system where I live.  And despite having a job, it only pays me $250/monthly which is not enough, because I am renting an apartment. And have a caregiver to check on my welfare, as I have difficulties in movement and series of bad episodes. I am also taking care of my cats and dog,

I am also most of the time in an oxygen so that it will ease my breathing problems. I have bad days, but I am trying my best to ease the pain and smile everyday.💖💝 I am really ashamed to ask help once again, as you all know I made my Etsy store several months ago to help with my expenses, but Etsy permanently suspend it without any proper explanation, despite my appeal. The Laptop which I also use for designing is no longer working, and I need to redesign again to sell, to support my Treatment. I humbly ask for your support once again. As I need to have the procedure to be scheduled next week 24th of May. Update as of June: I am already home but unfortunately my bills have piled up again, and signed a promissory letter.

Please share this post, spread the word, this will help me a lot. Every contribution, no matter how small, will make a significant impact to me.

I am also starting to make an artwork to sell here on Ko-Fi once my procedure is finish. I might stay in HP for 4-5 days. Thank you so much for all the help! And I love you all!

For Donations $149 and above. If you wish to donate more than that please send them into parts(Ex.$300 = $100,$100,$50,$50), because Paypal will hold them usually for 10 working days. Thank you so much for understanding.

For Donors, you can send to me your screenshot of the amount that you have donated here: estiellearts@gmail.com and I will make a small gift for you, a digital art of dog or cat of your liking. Or if you have a tumblr please message me, and I will tag you of the art. It will take time for me to make them, and I ask for your patience about this matter. Thank you so much!

Sorry for tagging you all guys again, if you could tag any fundraising blogs and your friends here on Tumblr please do so. it will help boost my campaign. You can also share my link to your Social Media accounts, and if you can share this outside of tumblr. It will b a great help to me. @leonshin99 @shotce @thelovelywarriorsheart @sparkie96 @c1a1r3r3df1e1d @silvertonguelover @measurelessdreamer @fossil-finder @vietnoodle @irishspringyum @kevinbuiyin I am a Chreon and Geraskier fan as well. I have a small discord group and I appreciate for you to join if you can. It will be lovely to have more friends. DISCORD GROUP

[pancakeke]

I wrote a bunch of paragraphs about nothing in particular again so here it is under a readmore so it doesn't take up space.

like 8 years ago when people used tumblr more via desktop browser than its app, I put a 3rd party metric tracker in my desktop theme that logged how people were referred to my blog. it also captured what pages of my blog people viewed.

at one point during this time I reblogged a piece of pixel art from a japanese artist. they came to my blog through their activity page, and then searched my blog in a couple different ways for the terms "ドット" and "ドット絵" ("dot" and "dot art", as in pixel art). I checked those search urls myself to see if they found anything but there were no results because I never used those terms or specifically tagged pixel art in any other way.

ever since then I've made an effort to tag all pixel art I reblog with the term "pixel art". that artist was probably hoping to find more art to check out and it bums me out that my tagging system wasn't thorough enough to help.

this is why I have my current specific tag system lol. it keeps evolving but having the ability to find stuff you're into without jumping through hoops is really handy. (the site-wide post and tag searches return sooo much bullshit. it's a slog sifting through thr noise whenever I use those to fill my queue due to the sheer amount of manga caps, polls, liveblogs, personal posts, and fics posted without readmores...)

if only the way to view all tags you've ever used still worked. I think it caps at 500 or 1000 now and is also chronological so the first 500 or whatever tags you ever used show up in the list. then there's a hard stop and it does not update as you delete posts or use that mass tag editor to remove certain tags for your blog entirely.

I went through my used tag list earlier this year to unify certain tags and remove tags that I stopped using in favor for other ones, but I only got like 400 tagged terms down the list. maybe downloading my blog data would show more. the trick I mentioned uses your desktop blog's archive page. the tags are in its code so you can use "inspect element" to view it. I remember scrolling a lot to load a bunch of posts on the page but cant remember if this was required or I just did it to see if I could access more tags.

it's formatted all fucked and hard to manage but you can copy and paste the long chunk of tags into one cell of a spreadsheet and then use Data options to split them into columns by commas (or whatever punctuation separates them, I forget). a wide list is a huge pain to view so from there you can click on a cell containing data, click ctrl+a to highlight all data in thr row, copy, then paste special as "transposed" to turn the copied row 90° so it pastes as a column. the spreadsheet will wide as fuck from the hundreds of columns so honestly its easier to paste the transposed data into a new tab and delete the original vs clicking in the column to the left of your transposed data and then pressing ctrl+ shift+right arrow to select all rows to the right, then deleting the extra rows.

if you're in Excel you may have to use the "delete rows" option from the "home" tab and then save the sheet using "file > save" (do NOT save via the save button on the upper left corner or ctrl+s). this returns the sheet to a manageable size for scrolling (plus reduces its file size). this piece of shit software usually retains the sheet width/length even after you delete hundreds of columns/rows unless you use this trick of deleting specifically via home tab + saving specifically through the save menu.

I got a round number of tags when I did this which makes me think there's a cutoff.