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Explore Poker Rankings: Understand Hand Hierarchy & Strategies | Art of Cards
Master poker with Art of Cards' complete guide to hand rankings, sequences, and strategies. Learn the hierarchy of poker hands from Royal Flush to High Card. Visit now!
#poker sequence#poker chart#poker hand rankings#poker hierarchy#poker rankings#poker hands chart#poker hands in order
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speaking of linux. goddddd i hate fake tech nerds. what do you mean you claim to be super good at coding and know all of the latest tech stuff but in reality dedicate your soul to apple. what do you MEAN your primary device is an ipad and not a pc running linux that you built yourself. and your apple products arent even jailbroken???? AND when pressed about this you just claim that you simply love gamepidgeon too much to switch to any other brand????? good lord at this point im a bigger tech nerd than you and the most "complicated" tech thing i do is pirate video games
#this persons “interesting” claims also include: saying that an ai trained on the fibonacci sequence(???) can trade crypto for a profit#the way you count cards in poker is by. straight up memorizing which cards have been played#like what are you on about.......
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AAAAAGGGHU THE POKER FACE FINALE
It has been a long while since an episode gave so much to my shipper/fan girl self while simultaneously taking away.
Cliff having The Year From Hell? Hilarious. Cliff reciting the bridge from “Hook” as if it’s deep words of wisdom? Delightful. The fact that he has that bridge memorized in the first place (which I haven’t even done and I love that song)? Perfection. Cliff’s ridiculous monologue that lets your know he *absolutely* narrates his life like a Marlow novel? Wonderful. Cliff staring at Charlie asleep in the bed while “Lavender Blue” plays in the background, specifically at the line “my queen?” Hang on, my shipper heart needs to go absolutely nuts.
Aaaaaaaaaaaand then
Look. I love found family and I love crime family and I love honor among thieves tropes, and this…? Kinda stung. I was prepared for him to stay a bad guy, but I wasn’t prepared for him to be *slimy.* It gets in the way of that “hyper-competent, but graceful loser” vibe he had in the beginning. It also kind of stings that after everything, Charlie still trusted him enough to run to him. Man, how much would I have loved “Cliff and Charlie on the run together?” Hint: it would’ve been a lot.
Also, man, you bring in Ron Perlman for a single charismatic af scene and then…poof? Come. ON.
*sigh* ah well
It’s not quite as brutal a jossing as the Toffee/Moon ship got. But I wish there’d at least been more fic before the flip, if that makes sense? Like, it’s not even that I’m sad to see it happen in the show, I’m just sad that there’s not enough fandom around to give me the AUs I want
I think if I could change anything, I would’ve made this two separate episodes. At least. Maybe three. But give Cliff and Charlie’s Cross Country Cartrip it’s own episode. A whole episode of them bouncing off of each other, Cliff grudgingly granting her a day to solve a murder, etc. Let the betrayal really sting. It would’ve been a good breather after that incredible dark penultimate episode.
I mean, obviously, waiting for Season 2. I’ll watch it. And I’ll probably keep finding ways to ship Cliff/Charlie.
Because, after all.
The hook brings you back.
#poker face#spoilers#charlie cale#cliff legrand#charlie/cliff#seriously tho that opening sequence about had me on the floor#I love how Bratt simultaneously plays Cliff as like#this ultra cool hyper-competent wet works guy#but also just#such a loser
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re: the ending of poker face ep 1 (with all necessary caveats that I've only seen the first episode, and am very open to seeing if these questions get answered, and that I did enjoy the ep enough to want to keep watching, but also. hm)
so. okay. charlie suspects sterling jr. and cliff of being involved in nat's death. she records them talking about their shill for the poker game
she's almost sure of her suspicion and, before returning to the hotel, sends caine the recording to punish sterling jr. (hitting him where it hurts)
> why has she not already sent the unseen photo to the cops? as soon as she realizes for sure that cliff and sterling jr. killed nat (specifically because of the photo) she knows that a) it hasn't gotten into the right hands and b) what they'll do to keep it hidden
> we haven't seen the photo, but we know it features something truly shocking, and caine is deemed morally reprehensible. I get that charlie is angry and grieving over nat, wants to get back at sterling. jr by any means possible, but if caine is such an awful human, would she really give him the tip-off he needs to get out of the country ahead of the police? even if that's not her intention, it's an unavoidable side effect. maybe we'll find out the photo's not what we think, but I doubt it, since she specifically calls out kazimir caine's name when she finally emails the photo to the authorities
she returns to the hotel, confronts sterling jr. and confirms for a fact that he's responsible for killing nat. he and cliff threaten to kill her. she tells them about the recording
> that doesn't actually seem like much of a reason for them not to kill her at that moment. if anything, it seems like giving them more motivation. the recording isn't leverage, because she's already sent it to caine. it's not, "if you kill me, he'll hear about the rigged game." the damage is already done
> why. the fuck. does she follow sterling jr. and cliff down to the high roller suite. just to gloat when they realize caine is missing? she knows they've killed nat! they already threatened to kill her!! telling them about the recording bought her some time, so why the fuck isn't she using it right away?
feels like they could have spared like, at least a shot of whatever she lands on when she jumps out a 4th floor window
#to be clear I liked a lot of the show (very fun stylistically. excellent music. natasha lyonne)#it's more that these didn't feel so much like intentional cliffhangers or to-be-resolved questions#as lots and lots of requested suspension of disbelief for the specific sequence of events to play out how it did#poker face#poker face spoilers
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the way they used i wanna be your dog in lock stock is maybe one of my favourite soundtrack usages ever. like i can say this for most of the songs in the film (would mention hundred mile high city, liar liar and zorba the greek) but the way they use i wanna be your dog with that dolly zoom and the disorienting cam and editing and the totally blank expression on eddy's face is so effective it's literally perfect
#im so so so so normal about this film#this is literally my number one inspiration and my numver one filn ever i dont think anything will live up to#how i felt the first time i watched lock stock#i started smiling as soon as i heard eddy say bacon cozzers and then hundred mile high city started playing#liar liar is so perfect for the poker montage scene too i dont know how to explain it but it adds so much to the feeling#and zorba the greek is a stroke of cinematic genius that sequence brings me so much joy#i dont think i will ever stop talking about this film its just the best thing ever to me
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thank you twitter clip-and-repost-ers i owe you my life
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/3968f347a95b4c9b8e348398f327578d/db27f8ece3784a31-09/s540x810/8e8c1f01e005ca259bc8d5cb15c45d085c50e394.jpg)
what do you mean i missed amber going clean in the short WITH A 3A because i was making tea.
#i caught the end of the step sequence so i knew it was a good skate because she looked happy lol#love the doll i do but she has very little poker face#amber glenn#figure skating#2024 lombardia trophy#self reblog#v speaks
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Put on your best poker faces, because the pilot for Poker Nights at the Omega Timeline is here!
Poker Nights at the Omega Timeline is an idea I've spitballed for a few years, but got around this month to putting something together for it. The premise is as put on the tin; you play poker with a few characters from the Undertale AU sphere, and you watch them converse about various topics. Sometimes about you, sometimes about their general antics, sometimes about anything else.
This only covers a small portion of said conversations. While I could've gone on and written roughly half an hour of convos, I wanted to test the waters to see if people dig this sort of stuff. It's not particularly animated because of this, and there's no intro sequence the way the poker games have when booting for the first time.
#undertale#undertaleau#invertedfate#xtale#ot poppy story#aliveau#dusted frisk#xgaster#alive alphys#Omega timeline#core frisk
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Poker Night with the Arizona Dogs (18+)
"I'm all in, boys."
In an alternate take on Roger Crenshaw's first encounter with Arizona's wildest werewolves, the folklorist finds himself blindfolded and tied down on a full moon night. He knew they were fuzzing the cards when he made that bet, but he didn't know how fuzzy these cowboys could get...
This is an "adult picture book" containing a 20 page sequence of textless illustrations, featuring werewolves, transformation, gangbang, bondage, blindfold/gag, a trans male protagonist, oral, PIV, spitroasting, knotting (with internal), and a lot of cum.
Features characters from: Roger Crenshaw: The Wolves of the West (But check out the full series bundle, too!)
This book is not considered "canon" within the greater world of these characters. It's just for fun!
Out now!
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Midterm
Summary: When Asia's in need of a few lessons regarding matters of the bedroom, her colleague and friend, Kelvin, offers his expertise.
Pairing: Kelvin Harrison Jr. x Black!OC
Warnings: Mature Content (18+)
Word Count: 6k
MASTERLIST
Reading a congratulatory email with kind words and instructions to sign a lucrative offer was easy. Simply slip out of your third boring morning meeting, disappear into the surprisingly vacant courtyard, and spend no less than 30 minutes oscillating between excitement and sheer panic while clicking through pages of contracts to add your digital signature to an encrypted document. Kelvin followed the plan to the letter and then some.
The hard part was stifling the urge to scream at the birds and trees during peak business hours.
Voice low and eyes shifting in search of potential eavesdroppers, he sat in pensive silence to contemplate the gravity of his decision. In a little over a month, he'd be a Chicago resident. He'd wake up in his Chicago apartment, walk the Chicago streets, pass by Chicagoans on the way to his Chicago office, and then grab dinner ingredients at a Chicago grocery store. His license would change. Mail would need a new forwarding address. Updated voter registration, new doctors, a change in insurance, learning a transit system; change after change both excited and unnerved Kelvin all at once.
Part of him wanted to barge into his Head of Creative's office and slam his resignation on the table before clicking his heels together on the way out the door. Fuck this job. New and greener pastures were on the horizon! The other part, the terrified part of him that'd been worried sick since Saturday morning, couldn't even say the words out loud for fear that the wooden benches would absorb and tell his secret before he'd had time to craft poetic, well-thought-out lines.
In his mind, Kelvin thought he'd managed to maintain an impenetrable poker face. To a stranger or work acquaintance unschooled in Kelvin-ology, he could come across as convincing enough to overlook. For Asia, watching him from the communal kitchen, worry causing his knee to bounce in triple time told a different story.
"You know you can just go out there and talk to him, right?" Savannah's sarcastic introduction to an otherwise quiet moment cut through Asia's brain fog enough to garner attention as she shifted her weight from one side to the other. "I'm joking," Savannah laughed, trying to ease the tension between them. Asia's quick glance at the back of Kelvin's head provided the final number of a winning lottery sequence. "Wow, you really like him. Like, you two are a couple! I knew it."
Asia tried to remain casual as she crossed her arms and shrugged. "What are you talking about? Kel is my work friend."
"Must be a hell of a work friend for you to spend the night from his place. I noticed the cabinets, but I couldn't confirm until later that day when Kelvin took a meeting from the same place."
Savannah's cheeky grin sparked fear in Asia's heart. Widening her eyes, she craned her neck to see who may have heard her business in the area.
She leaned closer, keeping her voice low as she spoke. "You can't say that out loud," she cautioned. "We're being discreet!"
"Love you so much, Asia, but literally everyone knows."
"Everyone like who?"
"Asia," Savannah reiterated. "Every. One. The main crew has a group chat and everything. You just won me $20 bee-tee-dubbs. I'll share, promise."
Panic should've set in for Asia. Maybe dread and a tinge of fear. They'd broken another rule and crossed another carefully considered boundary in the pursuit of each other. Asia should've been nervous about how their not-so-secret pining had run through the office rumor mill and what it might mean for perceptions of her professionalism as one of the few Black women in the building. But relief was the only emotion worth exploring in the immediate aftermath of Savannah's revelation.
No more hiding. No more planning entrances five minutes apart or driving separate vehicles in busy morning traffic when one would suffice. They could share dinner leftovers during lunch and stop sneaking quiet giggles at jokes shared via text. No more hiding.
Relief helped Asia slowly release the extra air tightening her lungs and expanding her chest. She nodded at nothing in particular. "I expect my cut in all ones. It's for our strip club fund."
"Oooh, spicy," Savannah sang, stepping closer to speak in a hushed whisper. "So… how's it going with you two? How different is personal time Kelvin from work Kelvin?"
"Uh, I mean, you know. He's…you know."
Any sense of calm that offered a reprieve from an onslaught of complicated feelings was quickly replaced by the need to run out of the room and vomit. Knowing was one thing. Asking questions and wanting the scoop on something Asia deemed sacred and untouchable in conversation beyond what she chose to share was different.
Words sputtered from her lips as she tried to offer an explanation vague enough to get Savannah off her ass. The quiet roar of glass panes sliding on a metal track clipped Asia's start-and-stop sentence, turning all attention to Kelvin as he stepped in, looking like he'd just had his heart ripped in two and was trying but failing to keep his emotions intact. Savannah didn't seem to notice when she flagged him over. Asia couldn't take her eyes off his frown and sullen expression. Kelvin knew his face had betrayed him as soon as he was close enough for a thorough look at the questions knitting Asia's brows together.
Trying to play it cool, he swiftly pulled his hand out of his pocket and offered a wave to both ladies. "What's up?" A greeting he'd used a million times suddenly sounded bizarre. First mistake.
"Hiii!" Savannah's severe lack of subtly pulled a reluctant laugh from Kelvin before he shifted his gaze to focus on Asia.
"Asia. You good?"
She smiled and nodded. "Yeah, I'm good. What about you? You good?"
"I'm good now, yeah."
Anxieties feasting on his mind momentarily paused in reverence for Asia's presence. A true breath of fresh air. One he'd fight tooth and nail to keep in his life, distance be damned.
Savannah stood between the pair and their smitten grins, looking back and forth to see who'd make the first move. "This is just the cutest shit ever. I can't take it." Googly eyes slowly turned into blank stares aimed in her direction. Hint taken. "No, you're so right. I should get out of here. Asia, remember to put the thing on the slide at some point. In the one deck."
"Bye, Savannah!" Kelvin and Asia watched Savannah awkwardly scurry off to do only God knows what until they were safely alone.
Without a buffer to fill in the gaps, all the nausea-inducing worry from the morning's events came flooding back for Kelvin in another crushing wave. Had he been thinking straight, he would've opted to save such delicate news for the privacy of his living room when all the thoughts sitting jumbled like Soul Train board letters were sorted into the proper place. Unfortunately, life-changing information sure to shake the still-wet foundation on which they'd built their relationship ran off with his rationale long ago.
Kelvin opened his mouth to speak, then closed it when words didn't come out. He tried again. Then, one more time before finally forcing, "I have…something to tell you," into the atmosphere.
Asia tilted her head in curiosity. "So do I. Is yours good news or bad news?"
"Doesn't matter," he answered, trying to smile through the rapid thudding in his ears. "You go first."
Don't press, Asia. Resist! An inner monologue determined to usher Asia away from the sins of her past forced back 101 questions to make way for her surprise. "You know how the Moët client is looking for new artists for that summer series activation?" Kelvin nodded, vaguely remembering project details he'd contributed to in a past life. Asia reached into her back pocket to showcase two laminated passes on lanyards. "I convinced Chris and Sid to give me their passes so we could pull up. Now, we don't have to go all the way to Australia to see RINI. Fun, right?"
Kelvin recognized the big reveal as something he should be excited about. And, had present circumstances not reared its ugly head, he'd have no trouble sharing Asia's toothy grin and silly dance. He tried to fight the heavy haze clouding his day by raising his hand for a high five and flashing a vacant smile. "That's great, baby. I'm excited. Really."
So much for honesty.
Asia couldn't hide her skepticism, pushing her eyebrows high, and Kelvin couldn't hide his discomfort, which made him fidget with the contents of his front pockets.
"Yeah," Asia answered, disappointment in his half-assed reaction instantly stealing the light in her eyes and turning her bright smile into a shell of itself. "Um, what was your news? Anything good?"
Tact was never Kelvin's strong point. Breakups over text and ghosting were more his speed, no matter how much he hated that fact about himself. What everyone else saw as sleazeball behavior reserved for fuckboys deserving of eternal banishment to hell, he saw as protecting feelings.
Promises were promises, and Asia was worth more than slipping back into bad habits. Kelvin had to rip the band-aid and deal with the residual blood later. "Remember the Chicago job?" he asked, wringing his hands.
Oh no. Intuition and a random tarot reader told Asia to be on the lookout for roadblocks, but, dammit, she thought that meant traffic on the interstate or an annoying client ask, not the nagging tug of the Midwest.
"Yeah," she answered cautiously.
Kelvin adjusted the hydrant-red beanie on his head and sighed. Rip. The. Band-Aid. "They…called me back with all my negotiation demands met. And…”
"You took the job."
Patience was never Asia's virtue. Why beat around the bush when they could lay all the bad shit on the table and try to salvage a few pieces good enough to keep for fond memories later?
"Yeah." The finished sentence turned an abstract concept into reality, weighing so heavily on him that he found looking Asia in the eye and lifting his head too difficult. He repeated after her in a low, measured voice, "I took the job."
Suddenly, Asia couldn't help but hyper-fixate on her surroundings. The low hum of two French door refrigerators holding employee lunches was annoying. It always had been, but today, it sounded like an army of flies buzzing around the mess Kelvin's news had created. Distant laughter made her nostrils flare. How dare someone find joy in a time like this? The kitchen was too big and too open to contain the grief rising within her. Then, the stupid ping of notifications on Kelvin's phone threatened to blow her gasket. The stimuli converged simultaneously, bringing fresh tears to prickle at her waterline.
Asia forced them all back while Kelvin waited for her to say something to prove she didn't hate him. She extended a closed fist in his direction to match a closed-mouth smile. "Congratulations, Kel. I'm so proud of you. If we were somewhere else, I'd hug you."
"Hug me to sneak in for a choke or a real hug?"
"A real one," Asia chuckled, the sound of it returning to her stilted and lacking the mirth she intended. "I know you're bored here. You gotta do what you gotta do, right?"
Past all the hurt feelings and rage bubbling in her chest, Asia couldn't allow herself to stomp out Kelvin's fire with negativity. She'd save that for a tearful phone call with Sabrina or a good cry in the shower. Kelvin needed reassurance that he'd made the right decision, not the moaning and wailing she had planned for a moment alone.
"Yeah…" Kelvin paused to scan Asia's face for any sign of an impending adverse reaction but found none before he answered. Nothing. Not a shred of any identifiable emotion presented itself to Kelvin. Anxiety gripped him again. "Asia, don't shut me out. I know you have questions and fuckin' feelings. C'mon. Don't leave me out here by myself."
"Not here." An almost undetectable waver in her voice was enough to shatter Kelvin's heart into a million pieces. He watched her blink back tears to speak again. "Can we just be happy, please? For a little longer?"
He sighed, accepting defeat. "Okay." A mental reminder to add 'needs a moment before tough conversations' to his running list of things to know about Asia ran through his brain like neon letters on a marquee.
His index and middle fingers brushed across his puckered lips, collecting affection he quickly passed on to Asia. She kissed the spot his lips once occupied as a silent promise to revisit the subject when heightened emotions had time to return to baseline.
"You hungry? My treat."
An olive branch. Collective ease passed between them once Kelvin flashed a toothy grin at Asia and gestured ahead of him toward the courtyard doors. "After you."
What Kelvin couldn't have in her raw, unfiltered thoughts, he was more than happy to gain in a spare moment of mindless chatter over sushi a block away.
Something was better than nothing.
If left up to Asia, Chicago and all its complications would disappear because of her commitment to ignoring them.
City sounds and radio chatter on Saturday evening had spent more time filling silent gaps of conversation than Kelvin and Asia had for two straight days. The elephant in the room quickly became the elephant at the dinner table late Thursday night when Asia side-stepped the topic to discuss Married at First Sight instead, the elephant in the bedroom when the thought of Chicago kept her mind wandering too much to enjoy Kelvin feasting between her legs, and the elephant in the backseat while she pretended not to notice her boyfriend stealing glances at the red light.
Given the chance, Asia could avoid broaching the topic for weeks. Kelvin, on the other hand, couldn't ignore issues festering into resentment day by day. Before long, he'd carefully label boxes and precious belongings to ship to their new home. Being on the brink of drastic change without a resolution wasn't an option.
Standstill traffic and a small car accident separating them from their destination provided the perfect opportunity to catch Asia in close quarters and force the issue. Kelvin took a deep breath and slowly turned the volume down on one of Tyler the Creators' piano-heavy tracks, earning a confused side-eye for his behavior.
"Everything okay," Asia asked, shifting her body towards Kelvin so he could feel the full weight of her annoyance.
He shrugged. "You tell me, Asia. I'm not the one tiptoeing around some really important shit right now. Is everything okay?"
"Kelvin, not right now. We can talk about it when we get back tonight."
Arms crossed at her chest, and a deep frown sent Asia retreating into herself, frustrating Kelvin to the point of no return. When he imagined the first roadblock in their relationship, hogging the covers or choosing the thermostat's temperature came to mind. He expected little hurdles to make room for the big stuff. The relationship-altering, make-or-break whammies either strengthened a couple or sent them careening toward total implosion. This behemoth was a tsunami of complications he didn't expect but wouldn't allow to throw him off course.
"You said that last night and the night before. I'm tired of 'tonights!' It's happening, Asia! We can't get around the shit. So, talk to me right now!" Kelvin's body vibrated in time with his hands gripping and releasing the steering wheel until he practiced in and out deep, soothing breaths brought him back off the ledge. Asia watched his shoulders slowly slump away from his ears before he reached over to rest a warm palm on her inner thigh to stroke his thumb against smooth denim, his eyes apologetic as he looked over at her. "I didn't ask you to be with me for no reason. Can we talk about what all this means for us?"
Asia rested her hand atop his to twist the ring on his finger while she tried to gather words and explanations she'd practiced for days on end. "I don't know."
In all her soul-searching and reckoning with the inevitable, she realized that she had no idea what the next steps were.
She always had the answers, the plan, and the foresight to know how to proceed in any situation. This one, though – this flurry of warm feelings filled with complicated explanations and head-spinning romance – she couldn't figure out. Not even when she turned to practical skills and timeline plotting to make it all make sense.
I don't know. Kelvin wasn't sure what he expected when he decided to corner Asia for an answer, but that wasn't it. Not knowing was worse than not caring. He could deal with the finality of no longer giving a fuck. However, the uncertainty in what he thought was a reasonably black-or-white scenario was unnerving. Kelvin let the gut punch settle until Asia spoke again to soothe the pain she'd inflicted.
"How…how would it work," She questioned in a small voice, her eyes low to avoid cracking the nerve she'd built. "Tell me you have a plan. Because, if you don't, I –"
Kelvin rushed to reassure her. "I have a plan. Trust me." For once in his life, Kelvin was moving intentionally. No stone left unturned; no possibility left up to chance. "I leave in six weeks. Give me two to get my shit together, and you're on the first flight into O'Hare."
"And after that?"
"We'll talk every morning and every night. Then I'm on my way to you every other week, baby. And every other month, I'll make sure you get to me. Nonstop flight. The price doesn't matter. All you need is a packed suitcase. Or not. You can be naked the whole time. That's fine by me."
Two nonstop flights a month, airport pickups and drop-offs every other week, Fridays in, Monday mornings out, constant connection over the phone when the physical was out of the question—simple enough. There was no fluff, only a concerted effort to make a less-than-ideal situation work. The happiness didn't have to die if they didn't let it.
Still, Asia wrestled with separating idyllic assumptions from reality. What happened when schedules presented challenges? Or when the weather interrupted? Did distance make the heart grow fonder or help intertwined lives push away the realities of life together hundreds of miles apart.
Kelvin could see the wheel turning for Asia while she mulled over his proposal from every angle. "Give me a little more time, okay?" Deflating. The air in Kelvin's sails came through his nose in a disappointed huff just as traffic began to pick up enough for steady motion. She held his hand in place, hoping he could feel the intention behind her hesitancy. "I'm not closing the door on us. I need to make sure we're prepared. That's all."
The absence of an enthusiastic yes wasn't a no – another tidbit to add to Kelvin's growing Asia file. He'd have to find comfort in the details to keep her in his life. And damn, did he want to keep her in his life. His plan had more legs, including a permanent address change for Asia.
"That's okay. Take your time," he answered as he laced their fingers together and brought the back of her hand to his lips. "Just don't leave me hanging like that again."
"I won't. I'm sorry."
Relationships came with a learning curve Asia had to experience to understand. No one in her life had prepared her for conflict resolution. Being an only child taught her how to play by herself and keep her secrets close to her chest. There was nothing in the manual about coexisting with another human she cared for more and more each day. She didn't know how to share items or feelings. But Kelvin made her want to try. That had to count for something.
Once tense quiet returned to the comfortable, wordless quality time Kelvin and Asia had come to enjoy, it followed them for miles to the venue until the need to mix and mingle took center stage.
In a room full of strangers intermixed with a few familiar faces, they moved around like a couple for the first time. Introductions as a tandem flowed naturally. Seeing them move from group to group hand in hand amused but didn't surprise team members who'd long had their suspicions confirmed by Savannah. 'Alvin' as one member of the group named them. Not their preferred choice, but good enough for the moment.
As alcohol flowed and inhibitions were disarmed, smooth crooning and soul-stirring baselines from the artist of the hour pushed tomorrow's problems further down the road.
Kelvin kept a hand on Asia's hip while she allowed her body to sway along with RINI's soulful cover of Leon Bridges' "That's What I Love." Hearing his voice beyond the warbling of his JBL speaker from Asia blasting music far too loudly reminded Kelvin of the first time she shared her new favorite artist with him. She made him listen to Ultraviolet twice all the way through, forcing him to commit more lyrics to memory than he ever did for any other artist. Truthfully, the music didn't hit the same when she wasn't in the room. He tried listening on his own, but it was missing something or someone to add the depth he needed to make the album spin worth his time.
Applause filled the room just after the final strum of RINI's guitar reverberated. Asia beamed from a spot toward the back. Asia claimed she was fine where she was, but Kelvin knew she was too scared to get close and act like a crazed fan. His lips found her temple for a quick kiss as RINI prepared to end his showcase.
"I gotta find a way to get out to the States more. This is great," he laughed, causing the audience to join him. "My time is ending, but I can't go without singing the song that put me on your radar. Big thanks to Moët for letting me spend some time with you tonight. I'm excited to get to work this summer. Until then, this is Meet Me in Amsterdam. I hope you enjoy."
Asia couldn't contain her squeal, earning a low laugh from Kelvin once the open notes of her favorite song began.
I would sail across the world
Row this boat from dusk till dawn
Kelvin and Asia had heard the song plenty of times together, so much so that Kelvin was tired of its slow drone and accompanying music video. Both RINI and Meet Me in Amsterdam were on his list of things he could live without and still die a happy man.
Until the lyrics started to circle too close to home. A plea for the songwriter's love to make the leap and meet him in a foreign land felt like a page ripped directly from Kelvin's journal. Had he possessed the talent, he would've sung into Asia's ear while she leaned against him, caught in the rapture of beautiful lyrics.
She didn't need Kelvin's additional vocal performance to know her partner had fallen victim to the magic. She was right there with him, letting the music speak where neither her heart nor mind could reach.
Won't you come closer; let it take over
I don't need anything; I just want you
"I just want you." The words came out before Asia could stop them. She was never one to fall into the melodrama of romance, but maybe she'd never had an adequate opportunity. Maybe all she needed was a few glasses of white wine and a man looking back at her like universes formed in her eyes to give in to what she'd always considered unrealistic and a little corny.
Kelvin wrapped an arm around her waist before dipping his head to meet her parted lips as she craned her neck to get a better look at his face. "You got me."
Turning in his arms, she faced him head-on. "I want to try. For you. Let's make it work."
"Every other week. I swear."
"I know. I believe you."
Rolling waves filled with blinding passion set their bodies aflame, connecting them for a kiss too searing to start and end in a room full of people. Some things were best experienced behind doors clumsily kicked closed after Kelvin and Asia burst through the door of his apartment connected at the mouth.
Small items clattered on the ground as they bumped into the wall, sending anything not bolted to Kelvin's entryway table scattering in the darkness. The moonlight streaming through his balcony door was the only light to illuminate their path. They couldn't care less. Kissing and fondling were their only priorities on the way to shedding extraneous clothing.
The bedroom was too far, and the couch didn't provide enough leverage for what Kelvin wanted to do for Asia. The counter was too high off the ground, unfortunately. The table, though, was perfect.
Kelvin thanked God for weightlifting as he hoisted Asia up into his arms, tongues still dancing as he walked them across the room. Asia used her forearm to swipe decorative mats and rattan charger plates to the floor so her backside could fill the empty space.
Soft panting and the light smack of lips coming together and separating rhythmically filled charged cold air. Asia flinched when Kelvin slipped his hand beneath her t-shirt to reach her bra's front clasp.
"Take this off. Hurry up," Kelvin demanded as he stepped back to pull his crewneck over his head. He didn't have time for frilly language and sweet kisses. Maybe later, when they'd calmed down from their high. This first fuck was for all the sessions they'd missed between quiet nights in and words left unsaid. A little something to take the edge off.
Zippers sliding down, garments rustling, and leather sliding out of thin loops made Kelvin's apartment sound like a department store dressing room until they were reconnected in mind and body.
Half-dressed with goosebumps pebbling an expanse of rich brown skin, lovers let their hands roam freely while they grinded against each other.
Asia moaned at the feel of teeth gently tugging her bottom lip before pulling away to breathe. "C'mon, Kel. Right now," she rushed on in one breath. "I need it."
"What about the condom? It'll only take a second." Kelvin asked, half-hoping but not expecting Asia to abandon her primary stipulation.
"Fuck a condom. C'mon."
The go-ahead to proceed with caution thrown to the wind put them on a path to the sort of carnal and fleshly satisfaction Kelvin's father warned him about before he left home at 18.
Sorry, dad. This shit feels way too good to miss out on, Kelvin thought to himself as he slid into Asia's warmth inch by inch. He was weightless for a moment, floating in otherworldly bliss while he fit himself inside her body. "Fuck," he whispered.
"Oh…yes. Yesyesyes." Asia's toes curled, gripping at nothing in a desperate attempt to remain tethered to the atmosphere. "Wait a second. Don't move." Crossing her ankles at the small of his back, Asia pulled Kelvin in a little deeper, smiling at the small groan he muffled against her skin. She just needed to feel him. In six weeks, they'd have to plan moments of intimacy and simulate sex through a screen, waiting for the day they could be together in the flesh. Tonight, with his body filling every dip and ridge like the final piece to a puzzle, they could kick the can down the road for a few more days. "Okay. I'm ready."
Agonizingly slow thrusts helped them get acquainted with one another in a new way. Kelvin lifted his head from the crook of Asia's neck, yearning to look her in the eyes for an added layer of closeness. He pecked her nose, lips, chin, cheeks, and lips again, trying to keep those three words at bay.
"Faster, baby." A firm request teetering on begging broke through Kelvin's haze while Asia tried to pull him into her body by his shoulders.
He smirked. "Oh, you can talk now?" His taunting made Asia squirm against him for extra friction before he stopped and held her in place. "You up for another lesson?"
"Mhmm," she forced out, hoping her compliance would get her closer to the real fun.
"You been quiet all week. Imma need to hear you tonight if you wanna cum."
A horny, exasperated sigh preceded a short whimper. "What? I don't know how t –"
"Yeah, you do," Kelvin encouraged. Tell me what you want, and then I'll give you what you need."
Near painful throbbing has Asia ready to agree to anything if it meant she could finally come off some of the pressure from a stressful week. Quick agreeance earned her a return to Kelvin's slow back and forth, a shiver hitting both their spines as he took a shallow dive inside.
Asia took a deep breath and tested her voice. "You - you feel so good?" She closed her eyes, hoping Kelvin would take pity on her feeble attempt only to be rewarded with nothing. She tried again. "Right there, baby."
"We'll be here all night. Relax. Be confident."
Relax. Be confident. The gentle reminder and suckling at her neck helped Asia partially release the valve on her nervousness. Kelvin rocked into her expert precision and care, waiting to hear more.
A choppy moan caught in her throat before she could speak again. "You fuck me so good. You really thought I was gonna let you get that far away from me?"
Kelvin groaned and sped up enough for Asia to notice. She smiled, palming the back of his head to keep him close.
"There it is," he whispered. "Keep goin', beautiful. Tell me some more."
Bingo. Electricity sparking between them opened up a whole new world of vocal possibility. "I want all you got tonight, baby. Can you do that for me? Fuck me until I can't take anymore?"
"Uh-huh. I got you."
Asia rubbed circles at the nape of his neck, feeling a jolt in her body from another change in pace. "Mmm. Deeper, baby. You can do better than that, right? For me?" Her provocation ignited a burning desire for Kelvin to perform. He needed the glory. Asia dropped her talking display long enough to moan through her man putting his entire being into testing the limits of his little circular wooden table.
If sweet talk couldn't get him to knock the rings out of her, goading him with a challenge undoubtedly did the trick. Scratching against his back, demanding more depth, more speed, and more kissing spurred Kelvin into fast, furious fucking.
In no time, they were close. Deliciously, dangerously close. No protection meant no staying for the final hoorah. He had to time his exit perfectly for the right mix of precision and mutual satisfaction. Though Kelvin seemed to care, Asia was just hitting her stride.
"I think about you all day, waiting for you to fuck me just like this. I want you so bad sometimes." Asia confessed while Kelvin fucked her on his toes. "Even at work, when we’re not supposed to. That’s when I need you the most.” Grabbing the sides of his face with both hands, Asia forced him to look her in the eye. "Be good for me, baby. Make me cum."
Instructions? A command? A simple slip of the tongue? Kelvin couldn't bring himself to waste brain power distinguishing. He needed to focus. Focus on Asia's nipples rubbing against his chest and how her breaths and his started to become one. Then, the light sheen of sweat helping their bodies slide against one another. He focused on the sticky coating of arousal inviting him to rub his thumbpad against her clit.
Asia squealed, then licked Kelvin's open mouth. He rasped out a command of his own. "Come on! Come on!" Resolve began to wane. Any longer, and they'd be in the nearest drug store taking the walk of shame toward the Plan B pills.
If the walls ever decided to talk, they'd blush when recounting the vision of Asia forcing Kelvin's mouth against one of her breasts, trying to balance the sting from his hand colliding with her thigh with his warm tongue tracing braille on her areola.
Her body seized, making it almost impossible for him to pull out. Every other week on a stuffy flying bus sounded like hell, but if he had this to look forward to after the wheels touched the tarmac, he could drum up some enthusiasm in no time.
At the last moment, Kelvin forced himself out of his favorite place on earth just in time for the fruits of a mind-bending orgasm to spill from his head onto Asia's inner thigh. Together, they watched fresh semen coat supple skin, their chests heaving and ears ringing. Kelvin couldn't speak. He could only watch as Asia gathered a small amount on her fingertip and swiped it against her tongue.
Kelvin moaned when Asia moaned to relish the sensory experience of his taste. "Did I pass?" Her question fell on deaf ears, with Kelvin more focused on gathering more semen on his fingers to pop into her mouth. She treated him to a show, sucking the digits clean. She spoke again. "Answer me, baby. Did I pass?"
"With flying colors," Kelvin finally answered. Asia smiled into a searing kiss, reveling in her accomplishment. A new skill had been unlocked, and one more accolade had been added to her mental trophy case.
Another lesson to take her mind off of the inevitable. At least until the morning rolled around to wash the fresh coat of paint she'd forced over a very real, immovable problem.
RINI blasting from phone speakers dampened behind the bathroom door reminded Asia of the night before and how she'd allowed the heat of the moment to lock her into a contract she'd neglected to read the fine print on.
Facing the bedroom window, Asia snuggled deeper into warm sheets and scanned the pros and cons list on her phone. Pro #1: She could eat deep-dish pizza every other month. Con #1: Her man wouldn't be nearby multiple days a week. Which was more important. She couldn't decide. Food or the comforts of stable, local partnership?
She had started typing a new con when Kelvin emerged from the bathroom naked and moisturized from head to toe. "You awake now?"
Fuck. Asia thought she had more time to plaster on her happy face. She used a pretend yawn as her buffer. "Yeah," she answered, faking the funk. "Good morning, baby."
"Morning." Unbrushed teeth could never stop Kelvin from getting his first kiss of the day. He nuzzled his nose against hers before speaking. "Sleep okay?"
"Mhm. You?"
He nodded and slipped into bed beside her. "For the most part. I gotta show you something, though." Kelvin reached back to retrieve his phone from the nightstand's charging station. A few taps against the screen presented a short list of apartment options for Asia's inspection. "I started looking at some spots in the middle of the night. This one has a crazy second room for an office. Look at that view."
A wall of windows overlooking the downtown cityscape made Asia's stomach churn. Reality smacked her in the face. He was leaving and waiting on her approval on an apartment she couldn't stand in a city she wished didn't exist.
"That's so nice, baby. You can get a nice couch in there as a gaming room, too."
Kelvin considered her suggestion and nodded. "Damn, that's a good idea. I need to take you with me when I look next week. You down?"
"Uh…yeah. Yeah, I'll come." Asia shook off her rapidly increasing heartbeat and scooched closer to rest her head on Kelvin's shoulder. "Can you show me another one?"
Enthusiasm fading into meaningless sounds turned Kelvin into Charlie Brown's teacher as he gushed over layouts and natural light. She nodded along to nothing in particular. Smile. Rub his arm. Act supportive. Be the perfect girl. Just be happy for a little longer.
Reply if you'd liked to be tagged. DM if you’d like to be removed.
TAGS: @planetblaque @wvsspoppin @thatone-girly @avoidthings @slutsareteacherstoo @eilujion @amyhennessyhouse @yaachtynoboat711 @jenlovey @pinkpantheris @blowmymbackout @onherereading @becauseimswagman1 @thiccc-c @hrlzy @urfavblackbimbo @blackburnbook @ashanti-notthesinger @xo-goldengirl @ariiijestertheklown @blyffe @tvchi @wabi-sabi1090 @flydotty @aldrigmer444 @ash-ketchumzzz @nayaesworld @ms-mosley-ifunastyyy @writingsbytee @teddybeerz @trippyscotch @theogbadbitch @thevelvetwhispers @wowitsafemale @kindofaintrovert @sexysativa605 @jvzmine19 @turn-thy-paige @lapateeserie @simplyzeeka @supremechae @palmstreesallday @blackmoonchilee @ovohanna24 @prettypynklemonade @gwenda-fav @itsash-okay @sparklytemi @blackchickinthedesert @miyuhpapayuh
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so here's the thing
i've seen a bunch of people say on twitter and stuff how... ed's behavior is very abusive and his anger is dangerous and he isn't romantic lead material because of it
and i get where they're coming from
but to me the main issue isn't putting ed in the position of a romantic lead, but not crafting the narrative around his characterization so that it allows for a spicy romantic pirates-in-love narrative instead of...whatever this is.
i'm going to try and explain this. idk if i'll do well but i'll try
the way she show presents stede is as an innocent baby who isn't really equipped for pirate life. he goes into a fugue/disassociative state whenever there's any real violence, apparently, and needs protecting by other characters when things get too rough - for example when ed is telling ned lowe not to take the poker to stede.
that's fine! it's honestly adorable to see a masc character being so soft around the edges and being protected by other characters this way.
(i'm not going to touch on stede's... eh... not great characterization this season rn)
then there's izzy, who is shown as a bit violent, a bit rough around the edges. he's more likely to draw a sword or throw a punch or hit someone with a chair or take a punch like a champ. violence is just part of life for him and that's okay, it just Is, from small things like smacking stede on the ass to bigger things like being wall slammed, it's not all that big or bad for violence to happen around and with him, he tends to give as good as he gets (there's some nuance here but i'm talking the macro themes not the micro of what izzy does vs is done to him)
and finally there's ed
ed is presented as violent (stabbing knives at guys, telling fang to use the snail fork etc) and used to a life of violence, and then in season 2 he's presented as really violent, his anger coming out in dangerous and terrifying ways
and frankly, i'd be super into it if he and izzy were the main ship and that twisted dynamic from the first two episodes of s2 was explored and fleshed out into something deeper
friends to enemies to lovers who fight and fuck. angry pirates who lay hands on each other, who break the whole ship with each other in the heat of passion.
except instead, s2 gives us... abuse. it gives us izzy cringing and lowering his head and trying to protect the kids crew from ed's angry outbursts.
so when stede comes back and he's still soft around the edges and ed headbutts him and it's deliberate, it's... not a great look, and the vibes are a bit skewed
if stede fought back, if when ed struck out at him he struck back, if they fought rather than it being one-sided, if it was friends to enemies to lovers and not presented as healthy, but maybe they can work their way there, who knows, maybe even more like anne bonnie and mary read because hey, they were doing something very similar?
except they were both into it. they were both enjoying the fighting and the fucking and the burning down the house.
stede's not enjoying it.
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i cannot describe how much i hate this sequence just because of the way stede flinches
anne and mary don't!! mary jumps at the unexpected bang but she doesnt flinch, she doesn't cover her face like she thinks the vase will be coming for her not the wall and anne? looks so into it
and the thing is that in real life, no, you don't want to date someone who throws shit around, or headbutts you
but in fiction when it's two fucked up people doing this shit together like anne and mary?
that can be fun.
but instead what we've been given is stede flinching and apologizing to ed and then all of ed's...what, semi-redemption???? is done away from the other collection of people he abused, and then he spends some time on a fishing boat wearing a dog collar and everything is fine because he's good now and won't be doing anything bad ever again
and it's just... poor writing. the vibes are rancid.
i spent a really big chunk of time between s1 and s2 defending ed. i kept saying how what he did to izzy by making him eat his toe wasn't abuse, it was a one-off and abuse isn't a one-off thing it's a pattern, and then s2 made it a pattern.
explicitly. explicitly a pattern.
not just one toe but three.
jim saying "you're in an unhealthy relationship with blackbeard"
and all ed offered izzy was a "sorry about your leg" which might've been fine if izzy survived and they could work on this more, but instead that's all the apology and closure izzy will ever get
ed threw a chair and a vase and made stede flinch in fear and stede was right to do that. what part of any of this implies this will never happen again? that stede won't press the wrong button at some point and be on the receiving end? none of it
and if we'd been presented with a s2 stede bonnet who could handle himself and stand up for himself and fight back, then maybe i could imagine that turning into a weird sexy fucked up anne/mary like thing and maybe that could be why they put that episode in, but instead it feels like that episode was going, "look, see, ed's violence is fine because these two are fine with it with each other"
but stede isn't
ed and izzy or ed and stede in an unhealthy battle of a relationship could be such a fun, interesting and downright sexy thing to watch unfold on tv, and could honestly end somewhere far more down the chill end of the spectrum, but that's not what we've been given here
i cannot argue that ed isn't an abuser anymore, and not just of izzy but of the whole crew. he terrified frenchie.
it's not good writing to try and lean into the idea that ed and the pirates are violent and live a life of violence, so it's okay that ed's been violent, while simultaneously presenting his violence as traumatic and abusive, and then less than three episodes later saying oh it's fine now, he's just a little meow meow who can do no wrong, see?
especially considering they had him murdering people at the end of the season. and sure, you can say the english are just cannon fodder and they dont 'count', but they did before. ed explicitly did not kill before, and that included the english, or the spanish, or anyone else. so either they count or they don't, but flipping him on a dime makes no sense.
ALSO
having ed be the son of an abusive man who threw plates at his mother and made her cringe and then having ed kill his father to protect his mother and then a season later having ed become the kind of man who throws chairs and vases and makes his love interest cringe is, again, not bloody optimal
i want to say again i dont CARE about tv always presenting healthy relationships or tv always giving us aspirational goals. i want messy fucked up dynamics and terrible people making terrible choices, and still, to this day, i fucking love ed teach. i would honestly love to have seen them continue with ed's darkness and bring stede into it and see where they went with that, to have stede kill ned lowe and not just bury his feelings in ed but get off on it, enjoy the violence, and see where that led, but no
and so instead all we end up with is a protagonist who is being set up for a lifetime of abuse from an intimate partner, and a romantic lead who abuses his love interests (and yes. izzy is a love interest, he is set up like one and positioned like one and treated like one), frightens his love interests with his violence, is erratic and most of all inconsistently written. he was so sorry about scaring fang as though he hadn't been deliberately terrifying the whole crew for fuck knows how long? what?!
the whole fandom has spent so long saying, "no no, i know stede bonnet irl was a slave owner, but ofmd is using the names and not any real piracy, it's more disney piracy, you know? so that kind of stuff doesnt exist!" and then they flipped around and went "blackbeard is blackbeard and so he is evil and does all these horrible things" and i dont know how to rationalize the two sides of that because it feels so out of place
i'm getting rambly, this isnt a particularly well constructed thought process, i just feel like we were robbed both of a toxic, violent relationship that could be fun to see explored on tv and a soft and sweet love story between two middle aged men exploring their first loves in one fell swoop and there's no way for s3 to bring either of those things back because they got utterly torpedoed by making ed a horrible person
ugh
#ofmd critical#i hate that i'm using this tag now :c#edward teach#ed teach#ofmd s2#ofmd season 2#our flag means death#ofmd spoilers#ofmd meta#i guess#izzy hands#stede bonnet
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wouldn't it be wild if instead of poker face playing during the lotus casino sequence lin manuel liranda just gets up and starts singing and dancing and that's when they realize something is wrong
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LCDMC Script: The Count, Fernand and Opium
Out of all the cut material from the script there were only two subplots: Maximilien's involvement and the Count introducing Fernand to opium as a cure for his headaches. The latter is by far the largest cut, and the most devastating for myself as Fernand is my favourite. His absence or lack of involvement in the films middle section is noticeable, and I'd also wondered why he's so silent during many of the scenes he's in, lo and behond he had many of his lines cut. But I'll focus on the opium for now as it's an entire character arc we didn't get to see, and really could have benefitted a character who is supposed to hold significance, especially as the final showdown is between him and Edmond.
The opium plot begins, as we see in the film, with Fernand experiencing a headache as he leaves the Count's house, attributed to a 'metal souvenir'. He leaves in a hurry, which the Count later brings up in our first cut scene, which was connected to the poker game:
Fernand experiences another headache at the table, leaves, and the Count follows, helping him with his ether in a move described as having a "strange intimacy." I would have loved to have seen this, the power dynamics at play are excellent - Fernand is vulnerable and insecure (so unlike his arrogant younger self,) the Count's gesture is non-judgemental and kind as he offers him a "miraculous cure." Of course this is all part of his plan, yet there's something to be said about the image of a man smothering the mouth and nose of his vulnerable enemy with cloth and not hurting him, rather helping him. The intimacy is fascinating - here are two men who grew up together, the betrayer and the betrayed, yet when you spend the first 22 years of your life together some part of that intimacy must live on, as much as you might wish it didn't, even if you don't realise it. I would have loved to see Fernand vulnerable like this, too. It adds a layer to his post timeskip character that he could have really benefitted from.
Fernand takes the count up on this offer, arriving at his house in a scene which took place after Haydée talks to Edmond about her trip to the gardens with Albert.
The cure, it turns out, is opium, and the Count leads Fernand to an opium den within the house. We have a vague idea of what this scene would have looked like from this image shared by Pierre Niney on Instagram:
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The scene in its entirety:
Ross and I have analysed at length the few lines Fernand has prior to Edmond's arrest and how he absolutely felt superior to Edmond and that he (as part of the Morcerf family) is responsible for Edmond's success and therefore Edmond is forever in debt to him in his eyes. It's either impressive that they still got that feeling across with what they kept, or we think way too hard about these men, or both, but our suspicions were absolutely confirmed by Fernand's dream-memories and the way he speaks to dream-Edmond. I don't believe he ever thought Edmond was even a potential threat to his (at that point entirely nonexistent) romance with Mercédès because he did not even consider Edmond could be on the same playing field.
What's most interesting to me is this dream sequence is in Fernand's mind - it's likely he's had these dreams or thoughts so many times and this is what he tells himself: that Edmond had no right, Edmond betrayed him, it's Edmond's fault, he should have stayed in his place, he wouldn't have made Mercédès happy. Alongside this, he imagines Edmond asking him why he did it and saying he would have given his life for Fernand. It's regret and grief for a friend mixed with extreme entitlement, which ultimately wins.
The scene is quite exposition heavy in a way the film generally isn't, but the majority of the script is the same. They cut back exposition everywhere, so I believe they could have made this scene work and I wish they had. If nothing else, it would have been very fun to see the Count throttle the guy - again, there's an intense intimacy between them, with Fernand once again entirely vulnerable and this time the Count does take advantage of that. We see Edmond wasn't as ready as he thought he was to hear Fernand say such things, and the pure rush of emotion takes over. Equally, I can see why this might have had the potential to feel awkward within the narrative with the Count displaying violence towards an enemy during the middle section as opposed to the climax, however I think we do miss something by not allowing Fernand a scene with such a significance, and the dream exchange between the men is fascinating.
Furthering the intimacy, the opium plot steers us towards a world wherein the two men harbour an old (if imbalanced) care for each other which can neither be completely destroyed nor returned to. Their dialogue leading up to the final duel was intended to follow along these lines:
In the film, we have Edmond tell Fernand "You should have killed me," with Fernand replying "It's never too late." But here the thread of friendship is continued with dialogue of a very different sentiment, immediately juxtaposed by brutal fighting. Edmond's statement that he could have died for Fernand entirely backs up what Fernand imagined dream-Edmond to have felt ("I would have given my life for you.") Fernand rushing towards Edmond would have also mirrored dream-Edmond rushing at him.
The description of Fernand running up the stairs "four at a time" was also used earlier when Fernand was running to Villefort's office to save Edmond.
I am glad the wolves were removed from this scene however, it strips him back to just Edmond, who is now threatening enough on his own without the mask and character of the Count. It's a much more powerful image to see him descend the stairs alone and it's a real testament to how much he's changed.
Finally, after the duel, rather than cutting straight to Mercédès at the church, we were going to be shown the fate of the three villains:
Villefort and Danglars are entirely expected (the former can't exactly go anywhere else...) but Fernand's fate is interesting - rather than having him kill himself as he does in the book, he seems to be reliant on opium, presumably living in his memories now he is alone and disgraced.
The mention of him not wearing his eyepatch could be interpreted in a few ways, but I think this was intended to show his lack of care for his own honour and dignity, why should he care when everything's already lost? It's the cruellest fate of all for a man with such entitlement and complexes of superiority and heroism, and it's entirely deserved.
However, it should be said that a depiction of a disabled, drug addicted villain would have carried ableist connotations and overall I'm glad we didn't see what happened to him or Danglars (though there does exist a photo of the latter.)
It's impossible to estimate how much of this was even filmed, and it's unfortunately unlikely we'll ever know. We know Fernand did not leave the poker table, but we also have an image of Edmond attacking him in the opium den. My best guess would be that the decision was made some time during filming to allow either last minute changes to the script or reshoots of necessary scenes, rather than a whole cut during editing.
I'll save the rest of Fernand's cut content for another post, but the opium plot was the most significant loss and I think it's felt in how unfortunately action-less and hollow Fernand can feel at times in ways other characters don't.
#Hi you dont know how much ive been thinking about this. oh im not normal about this#excited to share all the other cut fernand stuff too they rlly silenced my boy#- 🦔#we've been analysing him to hell and back and the opium plot adds So Much#I wish they'd filmed it!!!#or just More of him#- 🦇#2024verse#LCDMC script#the count of monte cristo#le comte de monte cristo#edmond dantès#fernand de morcerf#the count of monte cristo 2024#le comte de monte cristo 2024#our posts#TCOMC
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These Wicked Games Collection
Ongoing (Last updated: Apr. 17, 2024)
An unhinged idea that turned into something more.
Pairing: Loki x Female Reader (OFC)
Ratings/Warnings: Smut, Fluff, playing games,
Summary: It all started with a poker game and a bet. Ever since then, you and Loki have been playing a game to catch the upper hand against each other. Will you win against the God of Mischief?
(⚡ Action Sequence) (💋 Smut) (💢 Angst / Trauma) (🎶 Song Fics) (👑 My favorites)
Poker Face 💋👑 The Chase 💋👑 20 Questions 💋👑 Truth or Dare 💋👑 House of Cards 💋👑 Hide and Seek - Coming Soon
#writing ideas#loki fanfic#loki fluff#mcu#loki laufeyson#loki fandom#loki x you#loki oneshot#loki x reader#loki smut#masterlist#loki imagine#loki x female reader#loki series#marvel fanfic#mochie85 masterlist#loki odinson#loki#loki marvel#mcu loki
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Black OPs 6 campaign review/analysis, obvious spoilers under the cut. This is long, so thank you if you indulge me 🙂↕️ I speak about Adler towards the end
Honestly where to start, I think I’ll need to play it through again because it was kind of a whirlwind, I think I was too caught up in the excitement of having Adler back. But here are my initial thoughts
I’ll start with some positives. The new characters, Marshall, Sevati and Felix. Love. Love all three of them, they’re brilliant. They’re well written and actually have some strong, unique and discernible personalities. They’re fleshed out and seem very much human, the absence of that has been an issue with call of duty characters in the past so I’m glad to see they’re pulling us in a new direction and understand they need characters like this to carry out effective story telling. If I had to pick a favourite it would be Marshall. He’s a strong and determined leader, but still fresh enough to not be completely war hardened and I like that. Felix and his perpetual anxiousness, melancholy hidden by a bright personality and aversion to being violent is intriguing (side note, he in particular conveyed so much with his facial expressions, especially when speaking with him in the safehouse amazing work there) Sevati’s back story is a little cliche but I still became very fond of her and her sharpness and her wit. I do ultimately enjoy the three more than park, sims and that other one (can’t remember his name don’t care lol) as a team. Jane was a somewhat adequate antagonist, I guess, but maybe just a bit cookie cutter and cliche - the unusually elaborate and unnecessarily long sequence surrounding her back story didn’t do much to change that I’m afraid. But more on that later.
Some of the missions were quite good, I’m not that good at critiquing actual gameplay but all I know is for the most part they were genuinely exciting and introduced us to a diverse range of environments. They’ve gone in quite a different direction, giving us quite a few actual spy missions with the gunslinging. It’s a funny juxtaposition to be in a war torn battle ground with tanks and helicopters and boom boom boom one minute and then in a swanky casino playing poker the next. I can imagine some who are looking for a hard hitting action game might have an issue with this and even I raised an eyebrow at first, but in all truth it stops things getting repetitive and gives us a chance to experience new aspects of the black ops universe.
Now I’m aware COD campaigns have a very limited amount of hours, and yet some of the missions were frustratingly time consuming and made no sense, nor added anything to the story or fit in smoothly. I’m so conscious of time ticking by as I play through COD campaigns, knowing the ending is always near. They implicated zombie mode into the main campaign in a very lengthy and out of place mission and I can’t say I appreciated it. They obviously kept the continuity by not actually inserting zombies into the canonical world of black Ops, but rather telling us we were hallucinating off some toxic gas and that’s why we were seeing zombies. Lord give me strength, THAT is lazy and forced. We have a whole mode to fuck up some zombies. I found it pointless, wasting precious time on what should have been spent on something else. It’s the same with the mission towards the end where they inject Jane with the drug and have us travel through her psyche. Look it was somewhat interesting, but why do we have to have like an hour worth of gameplay (depending on your speed) doing an in-depth deep dive into this woman’s background when we don’t actually really care about her? (Maybe some of you do I’m not sure) And all of that, just to kill her off so unceremoniously? why invest so much time into her then? why couldn’t her motives be explained in a more cohesive and less time consuming way that doesn’t just completely take us out of the game? And it left a glaring plot hole. She believed Adler killed her parents for YEARS and obviously had good intel to believe this. This provoked her into enacting her big diabolical plan against the CIA, and then when she was injected with the drug she suddenly realised it wasn’t him? What do you mean??? Did he do it or didn’t he? And what’s more, if Adler and Jane had some sort of past, where he “took her under his wing” why do we not get to see them interact or even acknowledge each other once? Why were her parents attacked from the inside? What’s with the weird alter ego shtick? Are they implying she’s suffering from some sort of personality disorder and she’s not actually responsible for any of her own actions? This section of the campaign was put in place to answer all the questions but it just left me with more. Idk, Overall that whole part was messy. It had me rolling my eyes. It seems the writers are being a lot more experimental but sometimes it just falls flats.
The ending was awful to me to the point I don’t even have the need to feel angry about it, just indifferent. I don’t have much to say about it. Anti-climatic is the optimal word here. They stopped the bombs, Case promptly kills Jane. Yaddah yaddah yaddah who cares. And obviously we have the end scene setting up the next campaign and that’s just kind of whatever, see you in four or more years I guess. OR, it will just be material for half assed plot lines for multiplayer and warzone with the new seasons, that’s something that recently occurred to me. I really hope that’s not the case.
Now onto Adler. I don’t think the campaign was Adler centric in the way we wanted it to be, but to be honest I think his side character role was generous and fair enough, it made sense and he fit in with the story very smoothly. I can totally see why he took a minor backseat. But with the time he did have in the campaign, I think they’ve done a good job with him. He’s completely different and I’m not exaggerating, this is not the Adler I know, this is not the Adler I struggled to write a semblance of personality for and still felt he was out of character when I did. I noticed a hint of change the moment I met him at the beginning of the game, and then realised he’s had somewhat of a personality transplant. He’s no longer completely cold, mysterious and closed off, he’s even dare I say kind of nicer, sometimes? if not much more charismatic. Don’t get me wrong, obviously he’s not the life and soul of the party and still a complete asshole and very veryyyy much lacking in morals and empathy, but this Adler is more receptive, animated, lighthearted, playful, constantly cracking jokes? It’s crazy. I know many of us have already realised that he likely acted so robotic in Cold War due to Bell, consequently he seems much more at ease with Case who is sort of the Bell of this game, they share quite a few parallels. We still didn’t really learn that much about Adler (apart from him being born in San Diego oooh) but he does show some weakness, a smidge of humility and human errors if you squint, and glimmers of emotions, primarily towards Woods. They both hint at their bond, friendship and respect for each other throughout the campaign, which is a nice touch. For example, the subtle genuine concern in his voice when he stays behind to be with Woods when he’s wounded is groundbreaking for him, a small little thing that somehow speaks volumes due to how little he’s previously shown us. This is already too long and I’m not going to speak about every single thing, but I’ll say Woods is perfect in this as a supporting character, but he’s always been one of the best things about black ops, he’s an icon. They’ve been tactful and realistic in writing him adjusting to his life out of the field and becoming disabled while still keeping his trademark funny and snarky attitude. I’m really glad he was with us!
And as for Case? Meh. We didn’t get much in regards to him. He’s no Bell that’s for sure and I’m more than ready to write him off.
All in all I’ll give the campaign 2.8/5 stars. Somewhat refreshing, great characters both new and old, cool settings (that safehouse was a LOT nicer to explore than the Cold War one huh?) average plot tarnished by a terrible ending, it was certainly an interesting concept but not executed as well as it could have been and somehow not really explored enough? Everything was kind of vague in a way that didn’t seem to be an issue that Cold War had. All in all they could have done more, could have utilised the runtime of the campaign more effectively. Stuff should have been added, a lot of stuff should have been cut.
#call of duty black ops 6#Russell Adler#call of duty cold war#call of duty#review#my ramblings#felix neumann#sevati dumas#Troy Marshall#frank woods#black ops 6
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About witches and villages that hate sorcerers (f!reader)
What happens when your communication gets cut off during a mission in a village, and everyone knew you went there in the wrong state of mind?
Tags: Jujutsu Kaisen, f!reader, light nanami x reader, angst, ptsd, mentions of bullying and violence, some fluff, nobody gets hurt.
WC: 800
This is part of my "Jujutsu Partners Canon Divergence AU". A sequence of short stories and random drabbles for a fic I'll eventually write (eventually). To see the ever-growing list of one-shots, please visit my masterlist :)
Disclaimer: they’re NOT written and posted in chronological order of events. To see where this story fits in the timeline, please check the masterlist mentioned above.
Everyone was worried, some more, some less. Yaga had told them the last thing you said to him on the phone was how the village was pinning the mishaps from the curse you exorcized on a girl whose parents died. They were calling her a witch. You said you were concerned for her safety, and sounded out of sorts. Then, the line went silent.
Nanami and Gojo were the most worried people of all. They knew your past, and specially, how you suffered for almost the same thing when you were younger. How you lost your parents very young, how you were from a place where you were hated by everyone, because they hated your family, and most of all, how you were, yourself, for so many years, pinned as a witch and hunted in so many small different ways until you left your house in the middle of the woods to search for a better life elsewhere.
"She's not Geto, we don't have to be so worried." Shoko remarked, as she was lighting a cigarette. She didn't realize she was lighting it the wrong way until Gojo turned it in her fingers. By that moment, any poker face she could be trying to conceive fell apart.
"S-she wouldn't, would she?" Ijichi asked, looking at everyone in the entrance hall. "I mean, she's kind-hearted and-"
"Suguru was kind, too." Gojo remarked, leaned over the wall with his fists tense inside his pockets.
"She has been off since that last mission, where the curse wound up burning the building in Roppongi." He sighed. "I should have never let her go on this. Damn."
"There is nothing we can do now. Her phone is dead and has been dead for hours, and all landlines are silent too." Nanami was seated with wide legs, elbows on each one, and rested his face on his pinched thumbs. "She will be back."
Nobody answered his last remark, said almost like wishful thinking out loud.
"I should've been here sooner." Gojo said, regretful. He arrived in the last 10 minutes and knew that if you did what they were thinking... there was no use for him to go and do anything, anymore. With the blasts from your technique, you could very well wipe the small village from the map in the last hours you went missing.
They heard footsteps, and the door opened as everyone got up, anxious in anticipation. You stood there, with a cold stare and a straight face, holding a child around 6 years old in your arms. The girl was dirty, but otherwise seemed fine, as she slept with her head on your shoulder.
"Shoko," you said, "I need you to take a look at her, please."
Shoko went to you, apprehensive and relieved at the same time, as she silently took the girl in her arms and started to walk towards her pseudo-office which she used to heal sorcerers and students.
Everyone was silent, looking at you and waiting for you to speak. If you did what they thought you did, you'd be arrested by them immediately, and that prospect hung heavy on their heads.
"There was a storm." You started. "My phone had no reception, the battery died and-" you were clearly numb and somewhat freaked out at the same time. "And I all I could do — think to do — was to bring this child here. So I blasted the door to where they were keeping her and-" you started breathing heavy. "And brought her. I had to walk miles before I got to a road and hitchhike my way here."
"Is that all?" Gojo asked, not turning around to look at you. He couldn't look at you at that moment. The moment you could confirm their worst fears.
"Yes. But someone should send help to that village. They are incommunicable." Your face had the slightest twitch.
Everyone let out a big exhalation at the same time, clearly relieved you had not gone under the same path Geto did, so many years ago.
Nanami walked towards you, standing still for a moment. You looked unsure as you gazed upon him. He then enveloped you in his arms and sighed heavily. "You came back."
Your body shivered as you reciprocated the hug. "I did." Your breathing started to become erratic as you pushed your face in his chest, and began to talk more silently. "Some of them, they were going to burn her. Like, actually burn her. A child. They were going to murder a child." Your eyes fell up with tears.
"We'll take care of this." Yaga said.
"We will. You can count on us." Gojo's voice came out of an actually genuine smile. He truly was happy he didn't lose another friend like that again. His fists were starting to relax.
"I know." You replied, as you pulled your slightly damp face from Nanami and looked at him. "I knew I could. Thank you all." A soft smile involuntarily covered your face.
He smiled back.
#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#gege when i catch you gege#jujutsu nanami#jjk fanfic#jjk nanami#nanami kento#kento nanami#gojo saturo#jjk gojo#jujutsu gojo#nanami x you#nanami x reader
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Right so hear me out, we're in the Hallelujah Mountain base and Quaritch has decided he needs to inspect the compound for security reasons. So basically, Military!Reader has to tidy up QUICKLY, and hide their cat which they SOMEHOW, illegally, smuggled onto Pandora (don't ask, I haven't worked out how yet) and they're really stressed about hiding it before Quaritch turns up. Discovery will result in Military!Reader having to return to Hell's Gate and face rotating home, or Quaritch shoving the cat outside to teach them a lesson.
Logically, the only thing to do is get everyone else in the compound involved. I mean, Grace and the Colonel are natural enemies, so it would be laughably easy to convince her to get on board. So within hours, Grace has roped in the others, and there's a plan for Jake to get rid of the cat hair whilst Norm puts the cat in an exopack and sneaks it out back when Quaritch enters to carry out his inspection. Meanwhile, Trudy is on standby to stuff the cat in the helicopter as a very last resort, whilst Graced nags the man's ear off to distract him.
In exchange, Military!Reader just have to act as security for that day's forest mission since Trudy's sick. It's a win win :D
ANYWAY, to cut a long - and excellently thought out - story short, come morning, Military!Reader now has a much bigger cat to hide.
(Tsu'tey followed them home because they've been growing closer and he's assured all of them he'd be long gone before the helicopter arrives. In simple terms, he is in no way a morning person, and is too big to move. Very quickly, it becomes the whole compound's problem.)
Cut a tense but funny sequence of three fully grown adults (Norm, Trudy, Jake) trying to sneak out a groggy Tsu'tey as well as the cat, whilst Military!Reader fails to keep a poker face, and Grace wonders how the hell she ended up in this situation.
And yes, Tsu'tey and the cat become best friends.
#Tsu'tey#I'm sorry but the cat characteristics I could bring up#The way I could just spend X amount of words comparing Tsu'tey to a cat#this is unhinged#It's giving sneaking out your date before Mum finds you#you know that trope where the love interest sneaks in through a window to spend the night?#Well this is the aftermath#with the added stress of a cat#tsu'tey x reader#I don't know if this makes sense#If I write this out in full this reader is going to be chaotic as fuck#avatar
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