#point is. yeah Aerith too that's how much she trusts him. if that's anything?
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I'd let Tseng kidnap me
Probably
Just. In general
PROBABLY.
to be fair when he faced Aerith (in what /i/ know is him kidnapping her), this happens:
so the implication, which perfectly makes sense, is that Aerith is going to let him kidnap her in exchange of dropping Marlene at her mom's house to keep her safe.
And he's likely ready to do that.
so like. my point is. Aerith too bro o7
#like imo it makes sense Aerith would barging and it makes sense Tseng agrees too#the only issue i have for now is that normally when Tseng goes to show he kidnapped Aerith he brutalizes her a bit in the OG#but then the compilation did show that Tseng is somewhat affectionate of Aerith and wouldn't hurt her without reasons#so i assumed then -- that on the plane he was especially rough to show his dedication to Shinra#but also tbh Aerith fights to get to tell Tifa Marlene is safe#so i guess the scene itself can still happen even if it's because they made a deal....#anyway! i'll see then!#point is. yeah Aerith too that's how much she trusts him. if that's anything?#ichareply#anonymous#ichafantalks ffvii#ichablogging ffviirg
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salvia, violet, willow, basil
â ( botanical headcanons )
salvia :  is your muse possessive over people or things that matter a lot to them ?how do they express that possessiveness ,  or lack thereof ?
â Aerith is incredibly possessive - sometimes to the point of pretty abject jealousy. Less so with physical possessions; the home and the things you own are replaceable. You can always get new things, but you can rarely get new people. When growing up, friends were something that Aerith had in incredibly short supply. Those who weren't chased off by her strangeness were likely chased off by her mother, and one of the few who she did eventually find closeness with, disappeared.
So, she clings tightly to the people she does have - which may or may not be a good thing, depending on how the other person feels. And if she feels like someone is trying to take them from her, she is fiercely protective. And though she wouldn't take her jealousy out on others, it would nonetheless fester - and she'd likely eventually turn it in on herself as opposed to blaming others for it.
She, obviously, cannot control others - and does not actively seek to - but she can't help feeling as lonely as she tends to and it shows in her fear of being left alone, causing her to hold onto what she has.
violet :Â Â how does your muse respond to betrayal ?
â Betrayal makes her angry. Aerith tends to extend a blanket trust to most people, believing in the goodness in people's hearts, but any real and abject trust is incredibly hard to come by. Aerith is naturally dodgy, avoidant, and playful to hide her intentions; to be truly trusted by Aerith is to be loved. And so, when you betray her, you're betraying that love she has for you.
Something I think about lot, in this respect, is her relationship with Tseng. I don't think that Aerith has a lot of surface respect for him, but I think over the years developed a sense that though he worked for those who wanted her for their own purposes, that when it really came down to it he would do right by her. So, when this trust in him is shattered, she is angry and hurt - and Tseng would, likely, never get that trust back from her.
She takes being betrayed incredibly seriously, and you'll never get the same smile from her that you used to if you do it.
willow :  how does your muse handle sadness  &  depression ?
â Depending on its source, the chances are that Aerith will completely hide her feelings. She's good at it, too, locking the way she feels away behind her positivity. It's easy for her to think on the bright side, and even when she's using it as a means to hide her true feelings, it isn't ever really a lie. Aerith always believes what she says, even when it's hard; there is always a bright side, and even as she battles her feelings, she knows someday that things will be alright.
There are times, though, where she'll talk about her feelings, especially if she thinks it will benefit those around her, as much as herself. Dealing with things together rather than alone often yields better results.
basil :Â Â does your muse have a love -Â hate relationship with anyone or anything ?
â Yes! Aerith has a love-hate relationship with everyone. With humanity itself, with her heritage, with Elmyra, with ... yeah, everyone. Aerith, in truth, has a lot of rage, but none of it is acted upon, and all of her less than kind feelings are kept tucked away, because much of it is largely out of frustration and complaints with circumstance, rather than any real founding.
At the end of the day, it's always far more love than it ever is hate.
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âWhy do so many old-school FFVII fans think that Cloud took Zackâs memories?â
Alright, so first things first. We gotta start from the beginning. We gotta start with Jenova.
Jenova is the name given to the alien entity known as the Calamity. âHeavenâs dark harbinger.â This being, assumed to be female because of the body she was in at the Crater, was basically godlike in her natural abilities. Historically, she was able to shapeshift. She was telepathic. She had a nigh indomitable will. And she used her abilities to infect the race of human(oid)s that happened upon her crash site--the Cetra.
Now, Ifalna, within the English translation of the OG, states that Jenova turned the Cetra into monsters, nearly wiping them all out, and that the wee few that remained basically had to be sacrificed to seal Jenova away before she could do anymore damage to all life on the planet. The notes Sephiroth finds within the Shinra Mansion seem to corroborate this version of events, as he tells Zack that the Cetra chose to fight the Calamity while the other humans âhidâ, thus being spared Jenovaâs shenanigans, allowing them to become the dominant race on the planet, but ultimately being cowards unworthy to be the shepherds of any star, to quote Emet-Selch from FFXIV. Stay with me now.
We also know that the notes Sephiroth reads within the Shinra Mansion do not, in any way, call Jenova the Calamity. They still refer to her as a Cetra. Meaning that those notes are outdated, before the discovery of a living Cetra, a Cetra who is 2000 years removed from her own peopleâs history. Right? So.
(âAh, but what about Genesis point-blank telling Sephiroth the truth? He knew what was up!â Yes, because Hollander and Hojo found out from Gastâs recordings, and Ifalna herself, what Jenova actually was, and then Hollander told Genesis, who then said some stupid ass shit to trigger Sephiroth into looking into the wrong information, and now Nibelheim is not Nibelheim anymore and Cloud is missing one more family member than he was when he joined Shinra. Also, fuck Genesis. Anyway.)
HOJO, yeah? Hojo, in two separate novels written by Nojima himself, states to Aerith and Tseng separately that Jenova 1) will inevitably infect all life on the planet with her âcellsâ because of the very nature of the Lifestream and 2) turned the Cetra against each other via subtle manipulation and illusions of their loved ones, dead or alive, conceived from their own memories. She didnât show up looking like the Eldritch horror with the eyeball nipple, she showed up looking like a run-of-the-mill Cetra. And she would further disguise herself as people a Cetra knew in order to gain their trust. And then, after she had gained that trust, she would say shit like, âHey. Your friend over there hates you,â or, âHey. Your friend over there wants to kill you.â And thus the Cetra, at the very least morally but probably also physically, became monsters and tore themselves apart.
You ever wonder why everything the Cetra had was booby-trapped and hidden behind riddles and self-sacrificial bullshit like their Temple? My guess is because Jenova made it so they couldnât trust anyone, even themselves.
âWhy did I read all that? What does that have to do with Cloud voring Zackâs memories?â
Because we gotta understand the mechanics of this bitch first so that we know what to look out for.
Now, we have an alien in stasis--presumed dead but definitely not--and a buncha scientists who really want a coveted spot sucking President Shinraâs dick as head of the Science Dept. who all think that taking the genetic material of a Cetra and splicing it into a modern-day humanâs DNA will give them a Geiger counter to the Promised Land. Which they want to use as fuel because only some of them really understand what mako is and the others are just fucking stupid. Anyway, my guess is that they archeology their way to Jenovaâs still-kinda-alive corpse and do some DNA testing and go, âAh! Weâve found a Cetra. It has to be one! Sheâs by the crater, after all, and thatâs where some of them were nuked by a Meteor! :) Weâre geniuses!â And Jenova, in the Lifestream, went, âGOTCHA, BITCH!â
And through the power of dino DNA, out pops a lot of nonviable lifeforms, some monsters, and, eventually, a relatively normal kid with a flare for the dramatic who will become wholly obsessed with apples and very boring literature that he will insist on repeating every five goddamn seconds. As he was no Geiger counter to the Promised Land, out pops another relatively normal kid who will grow up to have dreams, and honor, and steal food from his neighbors because he was so damn honorable that he just could not ask for a handout.
With Hollander and Gillianâs experiments not producing anything of note other than children that need love and support, Hojo and Lucrecia decide to take a slightly different sample of Jenovaâs cells and just start sticking them everywhere. Theyâre in Lucrecia. Theyâre in Lucreciaâs fetus. And...something strange starts to happen.
Lucrecia starts to feel the effects of Jenova. Lucreciaâs mind and body start to kind of deteriorate. Not the way that Genesisâ and Angealâs do later on, but she is plagued by shit like severe depression and fatigue. She falls out on the floor multiple times. Her bodyguard is a little late on pulling the trigger of the gun aimed at her husband and, instead of doing anything productive about her husband proving heâs an amoral murderous fuckhead, she just decides to play doll with her kinda undead bodyguard, get even sicker, and then, finally, pops out a very strange looking baby. In fact, he looks a little alien.
âNo, seriously, what does this have to do with anything?â
Genetics. How Jenova cells work. Whatever clump of cells they injected into Lucrecia, clearly different from those used in Project G, seemed to focus more on the mental fuckery aspect of Jenova than the physical, shapeshifting aspect of Jenova. I would also argue that one of the reasons Lucrecia was so adversely affected by the cells and Gillian was not is their mental well-being. Gillian, even when we meet her, seems very upbeat and doing pretty okay despite her husband having died from exhaustion a coupla years back. Lucrecia was depressed and very subservient even before she married Hojo. Losing her mentor--Vincentâs father--probably exacerbated that. And, later in Advent Children, that sort of mentality--hopelessness and despair--is what Sephirothâs Geostigma feeds off of. That and thoughts of death/dying. But that is more speculation than anything.
So, Sephirothâs cells are different from Genesisâ and Angealâs, and they were all three bred differently, but theyâre all kinda chimeras of Jenovaâs. And once Genesis learns about his origins, itâs like the lightbulb goes off. This guyâs creating clones by infecting his 2nd and 3rd Class SOLDIERs with his own cells. And when he does that, their physical appearance becomes his own. As does their will. Whatever Genesis wants, the clones also want. And then he just grows a wing for shits and giggles. Once he tells his BFF Angeal the sitch, behold! Heâs got monster clones--maybe because he realizes how fucked up overwriting a human being with yourself is--and wings, too. ...Why?
The power to do all of this shit was always there. It was genetically always there. They just had to be made aware of it, to have the puzzle piece put into place. When Sephiroth dies, that puzzle piece is put into place. And then he starts fuckinâ with shit. And turns into monstrous angels. And then dies again. And then comes back and finally grows himself his own wing. He did it, fellas. Heâs a big boy now.
But weâre not here to talk about Sephiroth--ignore how much I talked about Sephiroth and his mommies previously--weâre here to talk about ZACK and CLOUD.
âWhatâs up with Zack and Cloud?â
First, what we must realize is that even though Hojo says that both Zack and Cloud are failed clones because they 1) didnât take on any physical characteristics of Sephiroth, 2) didnât seem controlled by Jenova (or Sephiroth) and, 3) didnât exhibit the other signs of a Reunion impulse like the other clones in Nibelheim that does not mean that Sephirothâs cells, Jenovaâs cells, are not working on them.
As weâve observed in other 1sts, abilities do not always manifest immediately or even noticeably. Clearly, Sephirothâs physical appearance is a bit of a hint, but Genesis and Angeal look pretty damn normal and, if it werenât for their mako injections, they probably wouldnât be showing that much of an increase in physical capabilities. Theoretically. Maybe 10-year-old Angeal had biceps the size of a manâs head. I mean. Pff.
Zackâs tolerance to Jenova was strong due to his previous exposure in the SOLDIER program. Cloudâs mind broke pretty early on. Neither of these results matter to the fact that they both now have Sephirothâs cells within them--just as Genesisâ and Angealâs clones had theirs--and that their very wills are now going to be affected by Sephirothâs. But they are also going to be a little bit like him in terms of power.
Zackâs hair, when ingested by a Genesis clone, a clone of a Type-G SOLDIER, transforms that clone into a monster. Zack doesnât even have to do anything. The Jenova/Sephiroth cells within his body can just Do That, cause that change in another life form, of their own accord. Iâm honestly shocked that, whenever they gave Zack these S-cells, HE didnât turn into a monster. But thatâs neither here nor there. I wanna talk about Cloud.
Cloud has mako poisoning, which the Remake describes as his spirit/soul being stuck between his body and the Lifestream. Weird. Anyway, heâs not fully aware of his surroundings at all times, and he clearly canât control his body that much. He somehow has the ability to kinda get his feet shuffling, and Iâm going to go on a limb and say he can chew whatever food Zack gives him, but most of the time, heâs a puppet with cut strings.
But he is also still recovering from a mind break caused by Jenova cells. The same cells that are just chilling in his body, like they are in Zackâs. And all the months Zack is dragging his ass across a continent, an ocean, and another continent, they and Cloud are listening to whatever the fuck Zack is saying. Cloud is also constantly in physical contact with Zack.
In The Kids Are Alright: A Turks Side Story, Kadaj has the power to not only read surface thoughts and memories just by being near someone, but he can also read deeper ones by making physical contact with someone. Because Jenova. And Sephiroth, whose cells Cloud and Zack have, in the OG demonstrates that he, too, can glean thoughts and memories from others. Because Jenova.
If this power is a genetic trait, as it is with Genesis and Angeal, then, sitting pretty underneath their skin, Zack and Cloud have this ability. Dormant. Snoozing. Kinda like the 1st Class Trioâs wings.
But Zack has a high tolerance and a high ignorance to Jenova and just what he might be capable of. Cloudâs mind is floating in and out at best. Heâs not in control of himself. And when you have a situation like that, it is very, very easy to come to the conclusion that Cloudâs Jenova cells are passively absorbing the memories of Zackâs time in Nibelheim. That they are knitting these memories together with what little remain in Cloudâs head. That when Tifa comes across Cloud at the train station and calls him by name and remembers who he is that Cloudâs Jenova cells latch onto those memories in Tifa--as Sephiroth tells them they did--and they knit those memories with Zackâs and Cloudâs and the end result is the man we get at the beginning of the OG.
Because Cloud has visual memory of shit he never saw. Itâs not just a visual medium telling a visual story. You wanna know how I know that for a fact? Because, in the Remake, Cloud remembers Sephiroth walking up to Jenovaâs tank in the reactor from Sephirothâs perspective. He is looking through Sephirothâs eyes, through his memory, up at âMother.â In that moment in the Remake, Cloud is Sephiroth. Heâs not Cloud anymore.
Cloud sees Sephiroth delivering the speech of being an Ancient. Cloud wasnât there. Cloud didnât see that. Zack did. That is Zackâs memory.
The man writing the Remake is the same man whoâs been at the head of MOST FFVII writing. He was on the OG, he wrote Advent Children, he wrote the novels, he wrote Crisis Core, heâs writing the Remake. He knows what these cells can do because heâs crafted this world-building for decades.
Cloud didnât take all of Zackâs memories. He didnât need to. Kadaj, in the novel, doesnât glean everything from someone right off the bat. Because he doesnât need to. Only when he needs to learn something else does he go digging. The same is probably true for what Cloudâs cells most likely did to be able to know what he knows. Hell! Kadaj gets punched in the novel and he ACCIDENTALLY picks up the emotions and memories of the guy who punched him. He didnât want ��em but he got âem!â
There is evidence within the OG, and even more within the Compilation, that lend weight to the theory that Cloud unintentionally read Zackâs mind when it came to the events of Nibelheim.
For years, people have wondered, âHow the hell does Cloud know that if he wasnât there?â For years, people have wondered, âHow can he use the Buster Sword if he was just a little grunt that used a gun all the time?â The logical answer is, âBecause of his Jenova cells. They can just do that shit.â
#long post#ffvii#ffvii spoilers#zack fair#cloud strife#jenova#sephiroth#jesus christ i wrote a novel
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FF7R: Cloudâs hyper vigilance
Since this has come up a few times in the last couple of days I figured I'd stick it all in one place so everyone can see just how differently Cloud behaved pre and post sim cut scene.
Ok, spoiler warning for ppl who havenât played â do I still need to do this? Eh ok, (I tag FF7R spoilers as final fantasy 7 remake spoilers) and itâs gonna be long.
Also, this is one personâs interpretation of the scene, so if you disagree thatâs cool and weâll agree to disagree.
Youâre also gonna have to excuse the janky quality on some of the screens, Iâm grabbing them from Youtube and itâs frustrating af trying to get the exact moment I want. Idk why theyâre blurry or different sizes this time, so sorry about that and just bear with me.
Please check my master post to see if I've already covered your question, thanx
Let's mosey!
Before Cloud sees the love of his life run through by Sephiroth, he is attentive towards her, which we already knew, but he wasn't overly attentive. He looked to her to make sure she was ok, but he trusted that she'd be ok without him watching her every move.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/da151316af4551d3e56f6ba2cbd3ff6f/8b354755c7a78f35-8a/s400x600/dd47c5384336eed3144f5b55fd5d73fcfbe6af65.jpg)
Cloud turns his head only. Before that he was facing forward and not turned towards Tifa. He looks at her when they're talking, but doesn't move his entire body. Tbf, this is the part where Tifa fell 30+ft and said she thought she'd die for sure, which likely put Cloud in a more attentive state towards her anyway, but after that came the stairs or elevator, so he probably calmed down again. There's no threats between that moment and the sim, so he shouldn't feel the need to become overprotective towards Tifa. Seeing threats everywhere when there aren't any is a very bad sign, so it's a good thing Cloud didn't change after that first event.
Tifa gets stabbed and Cloud's reaction is heartbreaking. He doesn't know it's not real at this point. This is genuine shock and grief. He's failed her. There's no undoing this. The look on his face as he tries to locate Sephiroth is murderous. It morphs into shock when he sees Barret dead, too. He's let them both down.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/9f78649457d1bb9ca95f247a6c1d5499/8b354755c7a78f35-38/s250x250_c1/a981c8c982fee2c767e1ddade5014996daa083fe.jpg)
This is during the talk with Hart before they leave the sim. Cloud was literally just facing Tifa talking to her. He knows she's there. He has no reason to check on her again, other than he's worried what'll happen if he can't see her.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/1d3061e3d36a0977274d61416ec1650a/8b354755c7a78f35-3f/s250x250_c1/33829d56f9240573b418bfe70f399e745bcb488c.jpg)
Not even in the office yet. They're in the archive and Tifa's just moved forward to look around and Cloud has turned so they're lined up. He's obviously still shaken by the sim and feels the need to keep her within reach in case she needs saving.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/f7c95f01111c65c3a8756aa06b8d3d3e/8b354755c7a78f35-be/s400x600/b03dafba542bede6e6b7a4ce90da3005a5a38e9f.jpg)
In the office and Cloud again half turns so that he is more in line with Tifa's position. Why does Cloud feel threatened during this point? Because he doesn't know Domino and it could be a trap. Common sense he wants to keep an eye on the person he wants to keep alive.
Things only escalate from this point. The degree by which Cloud turns depends on how stressed/worried he is at that point. He doesn't know Hart or Domino, but he's less threatened than in later locations, so doesn't feel as much pressure to keep Tifa within arm's reach, which explains why the degree he turns by is less than other times.
During the atrium section, Cloud seems to relax a little. The threat reduces for him and he begins to lower his hyper vigilance towards Tifa. The sim event seems like he was overreacting maybe and he doesn't have to keep as close an eye on her. It was all just messing with his head and he needs to focus. Soldier Cloud gets him back on mission.
But that's when he suffers a different kind of stressful event that pushes him to a breaking point and he cries.Â
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/65b8d781711dc16df5053d8ccc449764/8b354755c7a78f35-5d/s400x600/b0b001aefcd8acff41560730e69da220653f52f4.jpg)
Cloud's stress levels begin rising again with the introduction of Hojo to the mix. He withdraws into himself, but even then he keeps some of his focus on Tifa's position. We can see here he is turned towards her, which accomplishes two goals. He's made himself a smaller target for Hojo, but also he can leap towards Tifa more easily if something happens.
It's during this event that Cloud has given up his position as leader. Barret takes control of the dialogue and later during the drum he gives Cloud orders, which are followed without argument. Cloud is doing the bare minimum needed to interact with people. He's focused on his goals. Protect Tifa. Save Aerith. Anything else is getting ignored.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/c11976b797d8e3ebc607ffbbfaa27b7a/8b354755c7a78f35-5a/s250x250_c1/ac5cb9e0011f5ed28c1c79faa6d4c1546589bf53.jpg)
Aerith's room after Cloud's collapse and you can see he's lined up with Tifa again, while talking to Aerith. It's even more obvious in the close up before this, but since Tifa wasn't visible I chose the longer shot because Cloud doesn't move from that shot to this and I'm not in the mood to deal with anyone trying to say I'm imagining things. I'm not.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/07efcd7dc5587d3e3dbcde23d9bc37bd/8b354755c7a78f35-24/s250x250_c1/b3e11261bc0530fb72e975f969b69bf5063d5300.jpg)
This is even more obvious. Cloud is standing behind Tifa, lined up with her. On purpose. He moved to this position before we got control of him back. He's just gone through a very stressful event with the Jenova thing and he's not in a good head space in general. Focusing on Tifa may well be a comfort thing for him as well. If he focuses on her then he doesn't have to think about himself.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/e3b7118b100b34870b5ffc4b0fd5720a/8b354755c7a78f35-62/s400x600/ddf23d270e32480c99b0f6da8e379d7ebaf95b93.jpg)
After reuniting with the girls and checking in with them, Cloud reorients his body to Tifa's position. The drum is one massive threat and Cloud's living through his nightmares with the medical room and the experiments. The last thing he wants is for something to happen to Tifa under his nose.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/4d0c13e9c812bd5c8df445088628adfe/8b354755c7a78f35-bf/s400x600/6c27d44a20c422eeae79bfe109c07e6aca0549ce.jpg)
Right after the above screen we see he's once again lined up with her position before control comes back to us.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/0b074de038f86123b348c9620c690dd6/8b354755c7a78f35-81/s250x250_c1/f781382e0ffeb9e78fe219f40ed697c5eb92e24d.jpg)
Lined up with Tifa's position again. I really don't have much else to say about this. It's all highlighting Cloud's anxiety after seeing her die in front of him. If he keeps her in line with himself then he can save her.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/82f7b81ee5b20f8c0abf022a88e956ff/8b354755c7a78f35-22/s400x600/46d6ff81dbe788de80d22d641a1e2875beeb7794.jpg)
And again, Cloud turns to where Tifa is. There's other people around, but he's only speaking to her. Only looking at her. She is his priority at this point. The others are along for the ride.
Now, I'm sure someone will try and point out that she's the one driving the truck, but that doesn't explain why he's only talking to her and doesn't include the others. He was facing front until a moment before he spoke. He could've raised his voice to include everyone in a general âlet's goâ way, but he chose to turn to Tifa and speak to her exclusively.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/5f40db8fbbde33057855a57114fc73fd/8b354755c7a78f35-d3/s400x600/be2554b350b5a967e8c00870557f1ffac284c771.jpg)
And turns to her again. This is actually the third time he turns to check on her position, but the times before that were glances back because the threat was in front of them (Sephiroth). He didn't need to turn and check on her because he was already in the ideal position to save her.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/f417819772003357b89f65065ac31718/8b354755c7a78f35-23/s540x810/f67da8ce1b0f7dae7e0dd2c48ce8b0dff7135e73.jpg)
After the arbiter battle, when they're in that between place which has something to do with CC with its sky and water imagery, we see Tifa walk into Cloud's peripheral vision and him turn towards her to check she's ok. He only turns away when he asks Aerith a question.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/47714a001cbbff05b12730193f0eb2b7/8b354755c7a78f35-c0/s400x600/b017bf141ae39cd3639651126e254fe7980f98bf.jpg)
Last scene of the game and even though Cloud is talking to the others and his head is turned towards them, his body is lined up exactly with Tifa's position.
In conclusion.
I know some of yall are gonna be awww he loves her so much he can't bear to let her out of his sight. Yeah, ok, you're right, but at the same time, Cloud is very anxious. He's become that worried about Tifa's safety that he can't help but keep her in view at all times. The only time he's not focused on her is when there's an actual threat he needs to deal with because then he knows where the problem is and how to take care of it. It's during those moments between threats that he's become hyper vigilant towards her, even more than he was before he thought she died.
Before the sim, he was attentive, but trusted she could deal with most problems. He figured either she could handle it or he'd get there in time.
After the sim, he still trusts her, but he doesn't trust himself to keep her safe, which is why he's become even more watchful towards her.
Iâm guessing this is gonna go towards his eroding sense of identity through the rest of the game until he shatters and we get the lifestream event where Tifa puts him back together again.
#final fantasy 7 remake spoilers#final fantasy 7 remake analysis#character analysis#Cloud strife#hyper vigilance#cloti
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Random Clouds and Moonlit Skies verse HCs
-Prompto/Cloud still has some Wanderlust issues, so when heâs about 16-17 he approaches his dad with the request for Cor to help him find a Required Adult for a business idea. While Cor is ... supportive, heâs also very surprised. He kinda assumed Prompto would become a Crownsguard or even a Kingsglaive considering how tied to the hip Prompto and Noctis are. Prompto just smiles and says he can help Noctis more if he does things his own way.
-Some discussion and enthusiastic support from Noctis later, Prompto runs his first delivery to Hammerhead as part of his Cloud Strife Delivery, as sponsored, not by Cor (for reasons Iâll explain later) but Cid. Only Zack, Seph, and Aerith (and Tifa who I have yet to decide when she gets introduced into the narrative) know WHY Prompto named his business that, but there you go XD. At least itâs easy to remember.
-Cid squints at Prompto for a long time when Prompto makes his first paid delivery, an envelope from Regis that basically has a letter saying âLook at how the bby Leonis has grown! Thank you ahead of time for supporting this idea and having all your name on the paperwork even though you didnât know this existed until now, and yes Cor is not sorry for forging your signature.â
-Cid rolls his eyes and calls Prompto reckless and Cor a cheat, but sure enough a poster advertising the new delivery business is up in the garage, the diner, and the general store by the end of the day.
-Cindy is thrilled and insists on being his go-to mechanic. Prompto takes it 100% seriously and Cid gets to quietly die from Grandadly Pride as his granddaughter and basically-grandson sit down and work out a contract where Cindy will get a major discount on all deliveries using Promptoâs service in exchange for Prompto getting free oil changes and a major discount on various repair services (but not any cosmetic services like new paint jobs, because those arenât ânecessaryâ for his business). Cid is So. Freaking. Proud. Itâs all goodnatured and probably not as haggled or airtight as a contract SHOULD be, but Prompto and Cindy (who are not yet an item btw) trust each other and know each other and so know that it wonât cause any issues.
-Promptoâs business is seasonal, he still has school after all for at least a little while longer and he also has to make time for training with the Glaive and keeping up with Noctis and handling the politics that come from being the Immortalâs Son. So, to start, itâs a summer only business. After he graduates it becomes all year round.
-Prompto is never particularly busy, mostly having a small pool of steady customers dotted all over Lucis (his biggest income are the Hunters who really enjoy having a speedy, competent source of delivery for their letters and care packages to and from home). He also runs delivers for the Glaives, but only on a person-to-person basis. No official âmilitary contractsâ upon his insistence.
-This is all actually intentional. Prompto doesnât want to be swamped in deliveries because frankly his business is just a very nice, profitable cover story for his real reasons. One being Wanderlust and the other being Helping Noctis.
-See, delivery businesses/import-export businesses can get special border licenses. While thereâs a yearly license registration fee and a customary inspection at checkpoints, those licenses mean if you have one, you can basically go anywhere. Even Niflheim held territory. Even overseas. Itâs basically a passport and a very minor political immunity pass. Of course, breaking crimes in other countries will still be dealt with harshly, but it means you canât be detained on the border solely for being a citizen of the other side (or for being the Immortalâs kid). As long as he keeps his head down and doesnât get caught anywhere near trouble, Prompto can go anywhere.
-Can you say âperfect spy coverâ?
-And yes both sides know that this is a perfect spy cover which is why business licenses of this nature are usually restricted and the bigger the business the more restricted to different areas across the border it is to keep all the potential spies corralled. But Prompto is a one-man business, a small-time delivery service that mostly goes to rural areas and only occasionally goes into a city. Sure heâs the Immortalâs Kid, but heâs shown no interest in politics ever and heâs off running a delivery business on a motorcycle he built himself rather than, you know, getting any form of formal military training or rank. Despite literally all the warning flags, Niflheim is a Bit Too Busy dealing with other, bigger, way more obvious things then a teenager delivering Grandma Hunterâs care package of cookies to Mister Nobody Hunter.
-So yeah Prompto scouts out stuff while delivering letters and things and may or may not sabotage a few of the more urgent things on the way without ever getting caught or even put under suspicion because he was Cloud Strife The Terrorist/SOLDIER/Savior of the World. He can avoid a few cameras and sleepy watchmen.
-This is totally how he meets Aranea and they become Snark Buddies.
-Also secretly Prompto now has the long-unused position of the Kingâs Hawk. Aka a member of the Retinue who specializes in gathering info/scouting ahead and in general being AWAY from the rest of the Retinue until called upon by their king. Prompto still regularly stays in Insomnia to rest and report and hang out with Noctis, but outside of Regis and Co, Titus, and Noctis and Co, no one knows Prompto as anything more than Noctisâs childhood friend and the Immortalâs Son who decided to abandon the fancy lifestyle as much as possible in favor of running around the wilds delivering crates of beans to rural shopkeeper and letters to lonely Hunters. Cor is so proud of his boy. Even if itâs lonely now to have Prompto living in an apartment outside the Citadel to help sell the image of a semi-rebellious loose-footed teen/adult.
-Also also Aranea once sarcastically asks if he would deliver something for her and is stunned when Prompto immediately rattles off his rates and the list of things he will not transport (drugs that arenât pre-approved six ways from Sunday by a legal pharmacist to the recipient because he understands needing a rare prescription but will not risk being used for a drug ring, military grade weapons, nothing militarily sensitive like classified papers, anything alive that isnât a potted, non-monster/non-toothed plant, etc etc). Aranea gapes for a bit, then slowly points out sheâs ... sheâs a Niflheim officer. Heâs a Leonis. Prompto just impatiently asks if sheâs gonna hire him for a delivery or not because he has to deliver that box of frozen frog parts to a wacky researcher lady halfway across Lucis by Monday.
-Aranea, just for the hilarity of it, asks him to deliver some random object to Loqi. Just- just to see if Prompto will ACTUALLY DO IT.
-Loqi calls two weeks later from the freaking capital of Niflheim, screeching about how bby Leonis just walked into his office and made him sign off on a package from her. Why did she send him a spiracorn horn. Why did she use a Lucian delivery service. WHY DOES THE SON OF THE FAMED IMMORTAL RUN A DELIVERY SERVICE THAT CAN EVEN GET TO HIS OFFICE IN THE CAPITAL OF NIFLHEIM.
-Aranea quietly dies laughing, just holding the phone away from her ear so all her crew can silently die with her as Loqi goes on an utter tirade.
#Secret Engima Rambles#Clouds and Moonlit Skies verse#prompto argentum#prompto is a badass#cloud strife#reincarnation fic
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FFVII REMAKE SPOILERS
Okay, Iâve given it a few days since the official launch. I have to give my thoughts on this game. Donât read if you are still playing through, as I WILL be talking about the ending and some things that diverged from the original game.
First off, this game was so good in so many ways.
I was worried about the gameplay, because Iâm not really an Action RPG gamer. But the gameplay was smooth, fun and well planned. I played the game on easy, so I could focus on getting through the story, but I WANT to play the next difficulty because I feel like I will enjoy the challange.
Then there was the graphics. Oh. My. God. This game is SO BEAUTIFUL. The scenery (even though itâs not always supposed to be beautiful, itâs so intricate and detailed and has such a scale and world building to it), the characters, the battle animations, the attacks...even the grotesque monsters look so well done. We KNOW the FF series is always known for itâs stunning visuals, but they really outdid themselves. And, yeah, there are a few texture bugs thatâll probably be patched at some point, but even things like the lighting and the facial expressions and body language...itâs all SO GOOD. If this was a movie they would be fighting for art direction awards.
But the part they totally blew my expectations away on, everyoneâs expectations, is the character and story development.
When they said they expanded Midgar they really, really did. But not by senselessly bloating it out. Everything they did led to making you more and more invested in the events. Spending more time with Team Avalanche meant that you cared about Biggs, Wedge and Jessie. Spending time talking to the NPCs in Sector 7 meant that you really, really wanted to stop that plate from coming down. And every time you spent time with one of the main characters, you felt like you knew and understood them better than you ever did.
By the time we got to the plate collapse I actually felt GUILTY for doing side quests and looking for treasure etc. Because it felt like Iâd failed the people in the slums (even though, obviously, taking your time doesnât change the story). And theyâd done SUCH A GREAT JOB in making the slums feel real.
Now...before I go into characters and relationships, let me be clear and upfront. I always have and always will ship Cloti. But I donât hate Aerith. I never actually played her much in the original game (I was spoiled for her death and was very pragmatic in not wanting to waste my EXP). This game is my first real taste of Aerith as a character and not a lost friend, so Iâve loved getting to know her.
Let me get the Cloti talk out of the way, first.
HOLY SHIT.
Iâm sure there are fans of other pairings who wonât agree, but most people are in agreement. Cloud and Tifa got a LOT of ship fuel in this game.
From the start, Tifa is the one person Cloud isnât standoffish around. He tries but within a few minutes of them teamed up in Sector 7 they are gently teasing each other in banter, and he is SOFT AS HELL towards her. Since this comes directly after the opening mission (where he and Barret are openly antagonistic to each other and he barely tolerates the rest of the team) itâs very obvious. As the chapter goes on he also listens to her and offers support and encouragement, which is completely different to the rest of his interactions thus far.
As the game goes on this difference continues, even when he starts to open up to others. Despite the fact that he has encouraging and impressed battle dialogue with Tifa and seems to respect her ability to take care of herself, the game has him constantly protective of her. They also touch each other A LOT (both initiated by Tifa and Cloud) and far more so than anyone else. There are some super charged moments between them, too (the train jump scene alone has enough sexual tension to start a baby boom) and there are several gratuituous scenes of them grabbing at each other in danger and showing extreme concern both physically and emotionally (and more of Cloud being SOFT AS HELL when it comes to Tifa). Plus their optional scene is super romantically suggestive (with the hug and his concern for her emotions and the hints at their shared history).
I could spend so much time going over all of their interactions and little moments because WOW. But I wanna go over the other relationships.
Cloud and Barret have such amazing development through the game. They start out as super antagonistic to each other. Barret doesnât trust him and Cloud doesnât care. But Barret is a softy at heart and he canât help but soften up a little. By the time of the second reactor mission they start to tolerate and appreciate each other a little. But by the time they are fighting to save the plate? At that point Cloud is invested in the Team and Barret knows heâs a good fighter and maybe a good guy. The optional scene (I havenât triggered it but was linked to a video) they have is such a good one where is shows how far theyâve come (Barret unloading his thoughts and emotions onto Cloud and feeling comforted by having spoken with him and Cloud willing to listen patiently and willing to be part of the Team).
Barret and Tifa have a rather familial relationship (Barret is super protective of his team and you can see this really early on) and their mutual respect and care for each other is wonderful. They know each other so well and are so emotionally open to each other.
Cloud and Aerith start out with him being pretty standoffish and barely tolerating her. But when she encourages him to save Tifa from Don Corneo they start to bond and their friendship starts to develop.
The slow build to Cloud finally sharing a high five (a few âhow do you humanâ moments with Avalanche, Tifa and Aerith and then misqueing one with Aerith before finally getting one right) was so damned adorable and is one of my fav moments!
I mean, I donât ship them (and with the SHEER VOLUME of Cloti moments plus the increased hints towards Aerithâs relationship with Zack I donât feel like Iâm supposed to) but I am 100% behind their friendship. Also...Aerith knows how to flirt with Cloud and then back off when heâs uncomfortable...unlike Jessie who was well out of order several times. She is cool.
But talking about friendships I am 100% behind and very much grateful to Squeenix for giving us?
Hello Aerti!
DAMN these girls got a lot of moments together and plenty of chance to interact and develop a bond and I LOVED IT. Cloud was totally a third wheel to them, most of the time, and so he should be. Thank you for giving us girls being friends and not letting a man get between them. Tifa and Aerith protecting and defending each other felt so good after seeing so much toxicity spread around by the less stable parts of both ship fandoms.
Between letting Tifa and Aerith spend time together and having Barret help Aerith out of Shinra Tower it felt like Squeenix are trying to spend more time on developing Aerithâs relationships with the whole team. And I LOVE that because itâs needed before we get to THAT moment in future games. Nanaki doesnât get much time with the others but itâs nice to see the starts of the bonds forming.
As much as I love shipping I love one thing just as much. FOUND FAMILY TROPES. And I want the next game to definitely go down this route for the entire Squad.
As for the characters individually...thank god we finally have the (not quite) real Cloud back. The emo fanon contruction is gone and we have our awkward, dorky, snarky boy back. I love him. He tries his best to be cool and all, but heâs a good boy at heart and it leaks out all over the place.
Same with Barret. Soft Team Dad hidden under a gruff guy who tries to come off as all tough and deadly. His moments regarding Marlene were super sweet and, like before, are such a contrast to his âbig bad activistâ self that itâs great to see him in both stages and the inbetween.
Tifa was ~chefâs kiss~. A little playful but also a little shy. Full of compassion but not a pushover. Tough as nails, when needed, but also emotionally open.
Aerith was super playful and fun. But there is an undercurrent of sadness and insecurity around her and there is a lot of speculation that she may Know Things. Possibly even her future death.
We donât get much of Nanaki or Reeve but I canât wait for more from them (in Reeveâs case, through Cait Sith who got a small cameo during the plate collapse) in the next game. It looks like we might get Nanaki being a proper teenage wolf kitty which is gonna be great!
Team Avalanche were all pretty great, except for Jessieâs outrageous flirting going totally over the line...Cloud was very clear with his refusals but she still didnât back off and was a step over the borderline of harrassment. That being said, other than the flirting, the team had some great moments. Jessieâs concern over how much of Reactor 1 was her fault and her GUILT was amazing. Biggs and Wedge, too, felt real and dimensional. Cloud building a small bond with the three of them (THEY GOT HIS FIRST TRUE AND BRIGHT SMILE) was so good and made the plate fall EVEN WORSE (despite the possibility of survival for them).
But now...the ending.
Oh boy.
There is a lot of talk and speculation about the ending and Iâm sure itâll be a hot topic until the next game comes out.
There are a few things it could mean on a scale of âbarely anything will change but this means that Squeenix have given themselves some wiggle room with future eventsâ all the way up to âeverything is gonna be totally different to the original game from here on outâ.
Everyone is mad at the thought of the next game going in the latter direction and itâs the biggest drawback of the game to most. The one thing holding them back from thinking this game a perfect adaptation of the original game.
Personally, I think that the game is not going to change that much. I DONâT think Zack is still alive (the game was very clear to show us that Cloud still had the buster sword...so much so as to equip it on him during the cut scene after Zackâs appearance, even if it wasnât his equiped weapon...Cloud probably wouldnât have the sword if Zack was alive). I do think the Sephiroth we saw could be from the future. I do think the game will mostly keep to the same beats and events but that certain things will change in execution in order to keep some element of surprise and suspense. The biggest of things being that I think Aerith will still die, but not in the same set of events.
Overall, this game was utterly fantastic in almost every way. As a fan of the original I was so, so happy with what they did. The production team should be so very proud of the effort and detail they put into this game. The love they have for the original was obvious in the presentation.
10/10 would and will play again!
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FF7 Remake Review (Characters)
Next are characters, which I more or less already knew before this but have more context now: (only minor spoilers for this part)
Cloud-
Heâs like Finn from Star Wars, Ex Shinra, Ex Stormtrooper, they know the ins and outs of the enemies. He really takes it serious about his money though, in a way I could see why with the slums and all as well as it being an excuse to hide his feelings but I just didnât expect it. It sounds like one of his battle quotes is âItâs timeâ and I say out loud âTime to de-evilize!â He has a few similar to Sora too that I like. But I have a bit of a pet peeve...LET ME PLAY AS YOUNG CLOUD AND TIFA $%^*&#@!
Villains-
Is Sephiroth a cross between Palpatine and Scar? âLet the hate consume you.â The other villains such as Heidigger (who is voiced by John DiMaggio of all people) are kind of annoying to be honest, I was bored every scene he was in, I like John DiMaggio, it made me think we were fighting Dr. Drakken, scar and all but I just donât think we need to see him deploy the enemies every time, it just seems pointless. Itâs not a hamper on the story or anything, I mean there are tons of villains in games that are just there and itâs fine all the same, plus we have better villains in the game so it evens out.
Barrett-
Heâs cool and gosh dang Marlene is adorable. But Barrett plays pretty nicely, itâd be kind of cool if he was the exception to gameplay type and went full on 3rd person shooter and you could just aim all over the place but heâs still really fun to play.
Tifa-
is a sweetheart. When I first saw her character, it was in KH2 and she was tearing apart this room, punching walls, and kicking down doors to find Cloud. While she keeps the strength, maybe she acted like that in the original but not here. I hear that personalities between her and Aerith have changed over time? Like there are different versions and they act different since thereâs FF7, Advent Children, Crisis Core and this remake, maybe itâs just the fan perception, Iâm not sure. Oh and I played Tifaâs theme on the jukebox and she started bobbing her head, so they respond to the music you play.
I know doing some of the mundane sounding side quests with Tifa, made them a whole lot better, when I said it helps the world building, I wasnât kidding, she made me feel motivated like âYeah this is a life in the slums but sheâs making the best of it and Iâm comfortable.â Iâd say her play style (in Smash terms) would be similar to Sonic, sheâs fast (thereâs even a speed upgrade you can get) but carries a punch if you have the right equipment.
Red XIII-
They call him a âlab rat dogâ but heâs a lion...right? Heâs not in it a whole lot so I donât have much to say about him other than him having a killer design and he and Barrett make the best joke of the game (the car one). You donât play as him which I believe you could in the original, he still helps out with damage though which brings me to another topic, I know I finished gameplay but this wouldâve been a great opportunity to use more reaction commands, you donât really see them in much of any game any more, theyâre like the Star Wars prequels, you donât realize what you have until itâs gone, there are a good bit of moments like that.
Aerith-
Trust me, I loved climbing rooftops with her. One thing I see pointed out is that sheâs a bit more sassy in this version, itâs kind of funny at times. Her dodge could use a little work though I could say that sheâs not an experienced fighter like the others yet her magic came in clutch for me time and time again. Both her and Tifa are cool with kids but Aerith and that scene in Chapter 12 was the first part I got chills.
I didnât do all of the Chapter 8 (Sector 5, where Aerith is) side quests because I did the first few and hated them, those hedgehog pies and smoggers are really annoying, I figured whoever I choose, Iâll make up for it later. Now Iâm going to put this is in a context so people who played understand and those who havenât wonât since Iâm not technically into the story section. The whole secret with Aerith is just weird in my opinion, I mean it ties in with the story and is in the original but I had to look that up, I actually thought that that wouldâve been one of the big changes they made but no.
What route did I take? I knew beforehand that I would have to kind of sway towards one character or another, whether that be Tifa or Aerith and so on but I never knew who I was going to pick pre-game. I kind of tried to stay mindful of what exactly I was choosing while at the same time just doing it âmy wayâ and see what happens, who Iâll like better. What I hate is that you have to choose before you give both girls a fair shot and get proper introduction because you have to do all the quests in chapter 3 to get Tifa and skip it to get Aerith (you could probably still save it because of the date points but still). It said you have to pick someone regardless whether you do the quests or not so I thought maybe do all the quests in Ch.3 and 8 then go from there, it got to the point where I decided to pick Barrett just so I wouldnât have to decide but at that point the âpointâ system was already too high for each of the girls, Barrettâs route was already disabled. The big decision between the two was the sewers which I kind of have to appreciate how that was done. I even made a comparison list because of how much I was thinking about it and whoever got more...you think Iâm joking?Â
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/89491165d1f0aa610a9dbc83ff2075a9/1dee00acf8f5154d-78/s540x810/a6559567e020c318df0b5c89e7a3a59edc9e2ab5.jpg)
Yeah bad handwriting but I couldnât come up with any bad things for Tifa other than her trying to be mature, only a few for Aerith as you can see however I actually ended up looking up something that put things in a certain perspective, Aerith saw Zack in Cloud when he was messed up, that might be why she likes him while Tifa likes the real him hence the scene afterwards in the original (plus I think I even heard her call him Zack during combat (unless I misheard, I canât find any evidence online)). So that means I picked the dress for Tifa, Exotic. Also look at this and tell me that doesnât fit Aerith.
So those are my ships, Iâll update what happened with them in the story section.
The others in Avalanche, Iâll just lodge together. Wedge, I donât see why they got Matt L Jones to play him but he also doesnât do anything so whatever. Biggs is kind of cool I guess, just another hot shot. Iâm surprised Jessie got the part she did after playing through the first section, I expected her to be forgotten about after that but no, apparently the remake gave them bigger roles, in the original they were very limited. But Jessieâs pretty cool, my favorite of the bunch and I helped her out when I could but I didnât choose the âno promisesâ date option or anything (does that mean I led her on? Is that bad in a video game?) You donât play as them though, I get that they tried to vary gameplay types with each person and these guys had very similar styles to others already (and you canât just play as every character you see).
Quick graphics section, you already know they look good, I mean itâs even better than Advent Children (which I havenât saw much of other than models and screenshots) and that was obviously prerendered CGI but I couldnât imagine being a fan of the original and seeing these updated designs, not even of the characters but enemies. I was looking at why you can use cure on ghosts and it brought me to the original FF7 wiki and I saw what they used to look like (granted they look cool) but I just never expected such a upscale. Itâs something fans can appreciate, and also goes the other way around, I could tell some scenes were from the original and were really improved on, it almost gave me a sense of nostalgia and I never even played the game, this was made with love.
(PART 1)
(PART 3)
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Beyond this Existence: New Life, short 8-- Precarious
Recovery is a tedious, nonlinear process. Demyx, Ienzo, and the others living in Radiant Garden's castle have to learn to come to terms with their pasts and their memories, learn to grow, and begin to understand what, exactly, it means to be human. While there is unexpected joy in this, there is also unexpected sorrow. A series of oneshots set after Beyond this Existence.
Current short: âPrecarious.â Demyx finds Ansem wandering deliriously in the rain, and this dredges up painful memories for all involved.
Read it on FF.net/on AO3
----
It was a stormy, blustery kind of day. Wind wailed against the stone of town, eerie and ghostlike.
Demyx and Aerith hadnât had a whole lot of work that day; he noticed, for whatever reason, these things seemed to come and go in waves, regardless of whether or not it was sickness. Instead they were making a backlog of medicine, jockeying for the limited counter space in Aerithâs kitchen.
There had been a point when this made him nervous, when memorizing lists of ingredients and their corresponding spells gave him intense anxiety. Even just a few months later, it seemed second nature.
Maybe he wasnât so stupid after all.
â...You seem spacey,â Aerith said.
âWhat? Oh, sorry.â
âWhatâs on your mind?â
âJust thinking that itâs gotten easier. Thatâs all.â
She smiled. âI knew it would. I told you. It just takes practice. I think youâre more of a manual learner, anyway.â
âThat what Even says.â Demyx put the capsules in their bottles and labeled them.
âYouâve been doing well with the injuries, too. How many broken bones is it?â
âToo many to count.â
âExactly. Itâs baby steps.â
He nodded, then said, âYou donât have to take care of my ego.â
She snorted. âTrust me. I wouldnât.â
The wind kicked up even more firmly against the kitchen windows. Thunder echoed against the stone.
Aerith frowned. âYou should go home, unless you want to wait out the storm here.â
âIs this sort of weather normal?â
âFor late summer, yes. The beginning and end of the droughtâs always like this.â
He shook his head. âAlright. Well. I guess Iâll see you tomorrow.â
âIâm visiting Theo and Anya in the morning, just to make sure Anyaâs cancer has stayed gone. You should be there to observe.â
It was the first time sheâd mentioned bringing him along to something so serious. âOh⌠Sure. When?â
âIâll text you. Now get going before it rains.â
Demyx set off. The sky was dark, almost black, and town had gone still. The normally busy marketplace was all but empty, stalls shuttered or battened down with tarps. He picked up his pace.
He liked rain. The smell of it, the feel of it against his skin. It could be calming, could quiet down the human noise of the world, leaving behind the rest. This was not one of those storms. This was the kind that could blow out windows. Demyx pushed against the wind and felt the thin needles of water as the rain began to break.
The angry music of it quickly soaked him though. He made it up to the postern at last, preparing himself mentally for Dilanâs inevitable lecture about him getting mud everywhere, when he saw something.
Ansem stood, in the rain and the wind, by the railing, his red scarf flicking agitatedly.
Demyx approached him. âAnsem?â
He didnât turn; his orange eyes stared over at the town, his face grim, stony.
âWe should go in case thereâs lightning,â Demyx said. âThis is all metal. Itâll go up.â
He turned slightly. While he looked at Demyx, his eyes were elsewhere, slightly unfocused. âI havenât seen such a storm in some time.â
âYeah, itâs bad. Which is why we should go.â The stare was unnerving him, sending little flickers of anxiety through him. âWhy are you out here?â
âThere wasnât weather there. It was all black nothingness, stillness, hell.â
Demyx blinked. âIn the Realm of Darkness?â A peal of thunder startled him. âAnsem, Iâd love to talk this through with you inside. We canât stay out here.â
âNothing is sustainable.â
âLook, thatâs very philosophical, but I--â Demyx exhaled sharply, his heart in his throat. âAnsem, you didnât come out here to--?â
He blinked, slowly. âNo. I--no, that was not my intention. I suppose I wanted to feel--â Ansem didnât finish the sentence. âI suspect I am not well.â
âYeah? I can help you.â Between his heartbeat clanging in his ears and the wind, it was almost impossible to hear. He offered his hand to Ansem. âWe can talk about this.â
âWhat is there to say?â
âYouâve gotta have something. Youâre a smart guy. Youâve got a doctorate in something or another. Help me out.â
Ansemâs grip on the railing tightened. He might as well have been choking him. âI failed. I left them to clean up my mess. When he⌠when he apologized to me, only then did I realize what they did to that poor boy. I should have known they were using him as a puppet. I should never have--â
âAnsem, doing this isnât going to help.â
âIâm not sure what will.â
âPlease--â
âI have treated everyone in my life so poorly, without remorse. I have utterly neglected the code I swore to uphold. Why is it I deserve this chance when so many have perished?â
This was all sounding too familiar. Demyx swallowed the spit welling in his mouth, tasting rain. âI felt the same way too,â he admitted. âIn the war, there were so many of us in the unions. And do you know how many Dandelions there were? Three hundred. Three hundred people got to live while the rest suffered and died. And I lived again and again. You canât⌠you canât question why. Maybe consider that youâre meant to be here, for whatever reason. If you give up now, thatâs kind of like spitting on their graves, right?â
Ansem turned slightly.
âYou and me can do the right thing. We can help people. Thatâs why weâre here. You⌠you believe in fate, right? You canât see that as not mattering.â He offered his hand again. âLetâs go.â
After a long, agonizing moment, he reached out and took it. Ansemâs skin was warm, uncomfortably so. Demyx towed him steadily to the door, trying to maintain eye contact. As soon as they had crossed the threshold he breathed a sigh of relief. Ansem watched the water dripping from his scarf and coat like he wasnât sure what it was. Demyx kept hold of his hand and scanned his vitals quickly.
Ansem was a mess, physically speaking; feverish, low blood pressure, heart beating unsteadily. Heâd caught a bug, the bug made him delirious, and the delirium made him vulnerable to the pain he could usually keep controlled. It was sad, but made a lot of sense.
âCome on,â Demyx said softly. âWe should get changed. Youâre probably tired.â
âThings are⌠very unclearâŚâ He shook his head.
âYouâre just sick. Iâll help you.â
âYouâre too kind. I saw it in you when we met.â
Likely untrue. âCome on. Weâre almost there.â
Demyx was able to get Ansem to go put on dry clothes, and to get in bed. He fell fitfully asleep almost immediately. Anxiety and his damp clothes made Demyx shiver. He decided to chance going to change and get some medicine.
Dilan met him coming down the hallway and was predictably huffy. âYou do know Aeleus and I just washed the floors, right? I do not appreciate you tracking  mud and what have you--â
Demyx cut him off. âAnsemâs sick. I need to go get medicine. Can you keep him company for a few minutes?â
Dilan blinked. âYes--quite--whateverâs the matter?â
âIt feels like just a fever, but I--Iâll tell you in a bit.â
â...Certainly.â
He dried himself off quickly and felt a deep chill that only had partly to do with the rain. Demyx texted Ienzo and gathered some of the pills Aerith had gave him, including some antibiotics. Panic was making everything a little shimmery, as was the impact of what had just happened. He could freak out about this later.
Ansem was still asleep, flushed and washed out against the sheets. Demyx put up the kettle in the kitchen and shooed Dilan out of the seat heâd pulled up to the bedside. He felt again at Ansem, doing a little more of a thorough scan this time. It was a high fever, and seemed like one that had been unattended; he couldnât be sure of the cause, as it didnât feel bacterial. A virus. It didnât seem to be causing any dangerous damage.
But the thing was, in order to do this spell Demyx had to feel at his energy, his aura, and you could feel a lot about a person from their aura. He felt Ansemâs guilt and pain pour into him, staggering regret. He let go of it and swallowed nausea. The kettle was whistling loudly. âGet that for me,â Demyx said to Dilan.
âAbsolutely,â he said, with only a trace of bitterness, and came back with a cup of boiling water.
Demyx dropped one of the pills into it and watched it dissolve, turning a brownish pink.
âWhatâs that?â Dilan asked.
âFever reducer.â
âI see.â
Demyx waited for the tea to cool. The proper thing to do would be to continue tracking his vitals, and try to destroy the virus from within, but the pain was just too much. No wonder, at first chance, it had come poking out of his psyche.
âWhat on earth happened?â Dilan asked.
âHe mustâve been sick and decided to go out in the rain.â
âYour expression belies more than that.â
Demyx hesitated. Dilan had once been one of Ansemâs closest companions; didnât that mean anything? Before he could even try to explain, Ienzo came through the doors, his face drawn.
âIs he alright?â he asked in a strained voice.
âThe actual sickness itself doesnât feel too serious.â
Ienzo frowned. âThen whatever is the matter?â
He took a deep breath. âLetâs go over into the other room. You, too,â he added towards Dilan.
The private study was a mess. Books and papers flooded the desk, as well as crusty glasses. It didnât bode well for what Demyx had to say. Rain blew in from the partially open window; Dilan quickly sealed them.
Demyx took Ienzoâs hands.
âSo itâs a mysterious fainting illness?â Dilan asked dryly. He leaned against the windowsill.
âNot quite. Itâs a little baby virus. Once he gets some rest and fluids itâll take care of itself. Thatâs not why Iâm worried.â Demyx sighed. âI was coming up from town and I found him wandering deliriously by the postern. I think⌠and Iâm not sure how delusional he really was, but I think he was trying to kill himself.â
Ienzo touched his throat. He breathed heavily.
âYouâre sure you werenât merely seeing things in the rain?â Dilan asked.
âI spoke to him. He asked why he deserved to live when everyone else had died. Stuff like that. I know he was sick, and that kind of twists things, but IâŚâ
âI⌠I know heâs struggled, but I⌠I didnât think he wasâŚâ Ienzo sat in the rocking chair.
âWhat can we do?â Dilan asked.
âI mean, there are medicines and spells that can help balance brain chemistry, but I mean, we really just have to talk it out. Get him to talk about it.â He took a few shaky breaths. âIâm sorry.â
âIâm glad we know,â Dilan said.
âI can probably do the most,â Ienzo said, looking at the floor instead of either of them. âIâll⌠Iâll be here when he wakes.â His eyes were wide, and frightened. Demyx pulled him into an embrace, not particularly caring that Dilan was in the room. Demyx could feel Ienzo trembling. No doubt this was bringing up any number of unpleasant memories. He kissed him on the forehead.
âIâll be right back,â Demyx said. âKeep an eye on him,â he mouthed to Dilan, who nodded in response.
He didnât want to leave Ienzo, but he also couldnât be sure how deeply Ansem was sleeping, or how delirious he really was. The tea was now cool enough to be drunk; he shook Ansem gently.
âDemyx?â He seemed groggy, disoriented.
âHere. Drink this. Itâs for the fever.âAt least, Demyx noted, he had enough wherewithal to do that on his own. âYouâll be okay. Just a virus.â He fought hard to keep his voice neutral, soft-spoken. âThe rain doesnât help.â
âThe rain?â His expression sharpened. âIâm a--Iâm a fool.â
Idiot. He shouldnât have said that. âTry to get some rest. We can talk about this when youâre stronger.â Demyx took the empty cup from him.
âI do feel quite illâŚâ
âSo sleep, okay?â
Wearily, Ansem turned over and went back to sleep.
They waited for a while. Ansemâs fever slowly dropped, but didnât quite break. Ienzo sat on his other side, his expression grave, drawn. The rain continued to pour down. The room seemed dark, misty. Demyx didnât know what to do with himself. He checked Ansemâs vitals, dabbed the feverish sweat off his forehead. Scrolled through Kingstagram. Held his breath.
After the longest few hours of Demyxâs life, Ansem stirred. Demyx got him a glass of water. âHere,â he said in a tone that was much more strained than he intended. âDrink some water. Keep up your fluids.â
He sat up slowly and touched his brow. â...Boys?â Ansem asked. âWhat are you doing here?â
âYou fell ill,â Ienzo said, with difficulty.
âThat is rather⌠embarrassing.â Ansem took the water from Demyx, and didnât meet his eyes.
âWhat do you remember?â Demyx asked.
He frowned. âItâs all rather⌠hazy,â he said. âI was delirious, wasnât I?â
âSomething like that.â Demyx sat back down. âDo you remember anything else? Anything at all?â
Ansem held his gaze blankly for a moment, and then something seemed to spark. âOh, dear,â he said softly. âI do believe⌠I was to do something reckless.â
âReckless?â Ienzo asked incredulously. His face had turned pink.
Ansem turned to Ienzo. âMy dear, sweet boy. How have you ever forgiven me for all Iâve done? Why? I left you there, with that⌠monster.â
Demyx could see Ienzo trembling, and trying to keep it contained.
âI have not even played a decent role in your recovery.â
Demyx felt like he was watching something too intimate. He started to go to the other room.
âPlease stay,â Ienzo said in that same strained voice. Demyx understood. He stood behind him and rested his hands on his shoulders, feeling the incredible tension there. âForgive me. I am⌠reeling.â A peal of thunder made him jump, slightly. âI can act as your⌠son, in this moment, or I can act as a therapist. Not as both.â
âI want nothing more than your honesty, Ienzo.â
He exhaled heavily. âI was told so many lies.â Ienzo spoke so softly that Demyx had trouble hearing him over the rain. âLies about your sanity, about supposed experiments on children, about your⌠ulterior motive for adopting me.â
Ansem went to speak, but Ienzo held up a finger.
âAnd those liesâŚâ His free hand was clutched tightly in his lap. âThose lies mutated the truth, mutated my memories. In dealing with this⌠guilt, I have been trying to forgive you, to realize now that your abandonment was not one by choice. I know that. But my heartâŚâ His voice broke. âIn my heart that trust is no longer there.â
âI do not desire your forgiveness, Ienzo. Nor do I deserve it.â
Demyx could feel him trembling. Ienzo needed him in this moment, for whatever reason, which is why he remained present, but he felt he were being a voyeur, watching something far too private.
âIâŚâ His breathing grew more ragged. âI feel⌠used. Did you use me?â
âThat was never my intention.â The pain stretched Ansemâs face taut. âI wanted to give you an opportunity. You were a bright light in a growing darkness, and I hoped to give you a chance to use your brilliance for good. But I⌠I should have let that be your choice. You should have been given the chance at a childhood, a real one. Rather than spending it wrapped in matters too mature.â Ansem took Ienzoâs hand.
âDid you truly desire an end to your own life?â he asked.
âPain creeps unbidden. It is⌠difficult to fight it off.â
âI donât want that.â Demyx could hear Ienzoâs breaths quivering. âI donât want you to--â
âThen I wonât. Simply as that. I owe it to you, to live. I owe you so much more.â Ansem wiped, shakily at his eyes. âI am glad for your honesty. It gives me a sort of strength. If I know what is wrong, I can try to mend it.â
âI want that.â He was crying freely now. âI want that very much.â
Demyx handed him a clean handkerchief. Ienzo squeezed his hand once.
âWould you leave us?â Ienzo asked. âI do believe thereâs a lot to say.â
Demyx kissed his salty cheek. âOkay.â
#beyond this existence: new life#demyx#ienzo#ansem the wise#tw: suicide#or rather talk thereof#depression#beyond this existence
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Keys to the Kingdom Chapter 7
AN: SURPRISE new chapter of Keys so soon after the last one (that I forgot to fucking post alksdjalskdjklad) but yeah, this oneâs kind of a lot shorter than I thought it would be, but I do like it quite a lot, so I hope you will too. Enjoy!
Previous:Â https://minijenn.tumblr.com/post/184403048029/keys-to-the-kingdom-chapter-6
Chapter 7: Promising Beginnings
Youâre only everything Iâve ever dreamed Ever dreamed of, ever dreamed of
For as long as she had been able to remember, whatever life Kairi might have led prior to her arrival at the Destiny Islands had been a complete and utter mystery to her. It was as though her memories of her birthplace, the first few years of her life in general, had been washed away by the very same tide that had landed her on the islandâs shore in the first place. At the time, the only piece of fleeting knowledge the girl had carried with her was her own name. And for the longest time, the absence of those essential memories, of a home, a family, friends, anything else she might have once known, had created a deep, almost aching emptiness within her heart. An emptiness that, in time, had been filled by new memories from the new life she had come to lead. By the sound of the surf washing up onto the sand, by the way the pale glow of the moon would illuminate the small, peaceful village at night, by the seagulls and sand crabs and paopu fruit hanging from the lofty palm trees. By the mayor and his family, who had kindly, warmly taken her in and raised her as their own. By Selphie, Tidus, and Wakka. By Riku and perhaps most of all, by Sora.
And yet⌠the moment Kairi stepped foot into the rising city known as Radiant Garden, she knew. This was exactly where she had come from.
The spark of familiarity that had burst inside her heart upon even so much as a glance at the cityâs famous central plaza was undeniable. Though the memories of her childhood here were still distant shadows locked away in the back of her mind, Kairi was confident that she had walked these cobblestone streets before. She had a connection to this place, to her home, her real home, and the suddenness in realizing that connection was more than enough to rattle her to her core. She let out a shallow breath, her eyes wide as she pressed up against one of the courtyardâs shorter walls, a hand pressed again her head as she tried to remember something, anything else about her now former home.
And yet⌠the only memory that stirred was that of a womanâs voice, kind and gentle, followed by a burst of warmth centered around the very same pearl necklace Kairi still wore to this day. âI just cast a magic spell on you,â the womanâs voice said, her image all but indiscernible in Kairiâs practically faded memory. âOne day, when youâre in trouble, the light within you will lead you to the light of another. Someone to keep you safe.â
Kairiâs gaze drifted down to the charmed necklace, her fingertips grazing it ever so slightly. She still had no idea who the woman in her memory had been, but she couldnât help but feel as though her spell had rung true. Because for some reason or another, it had led her away from this place and to the Destiny Islands instead. To Sora and Riku. To someone who had kept her safe.
âExcuse me, are you all riâoh! Wait⌠Kairi?! Is that you?â
âHuh?â Kairi blinked out of her thoughts, realizing that she had slid down to sit against the wall. Focusing on the present once again, she noticed a young woman, clad in pink, with long, braided brown hair, her face filled with concern as she knelt down in front of her. A face that, after a moment or two, Kairi quickly recognized from her rather brief stint in Traverse Town well over a year ago now.
âAerith!â she exclaimed with a surprised smile, not hesitating to embrace the older girl. âItâs great to see you again!â
âSame to you,â Aerith chuckled warmly, returning the hug before extending a hand to help Kairi up. âLook at how much youâve grown! What brings you here to Radiant Garden?â
âIâm actually here to train to use my Keyblade under Merlin the wizard,â Kairi informed.
âOh, so youâre the other pupil he mentioned earlier!â Aerith said. âWell, in that case, itâll be great having you around here for a while.â
âThanks,â Kairi grinned, glad to know that there would be familiar faces around to help, even in some small way, ground her amidst the uncertainty she was facing in the new regiment she was about to undertake. âActually, Aerith, could you maybe point me in the right direction to Merlinâs house? I⌠donât really know my way around here anymoreâŚâ
âSay no more. Iâm actually heading there myself,â the older girl turned to head off, beckoning Kairi to follow her. âThe other members of the committee will be done their own rounds soon, but weâll probably still be the first to make it back.â
âCommittee?â Kairi asked as she walked alongside Aerith through the calm city streets.
âThe Radiant Garden Restoration Committee,â Aerith explained. âFor over a year now, weâve all been working hard to rebuild our home to the way it used to be. Thereâs still plenty of work to be done, but for now, Leon says weâve made pretty good progress.â
âWhat exactly did Radiant Garden need to be restored from?â Kairi wondered, eager to learn more about her former home.
Aerithâs expression saddened at this as she turned her glance over to the castle towering high over the cityâs smaller homes and shops. âSeveral years ago, this world was overrun by Maleficent and her endless army of Heartless.â
âMaleficent?â Kairi interjected, familiar with the dark fairyâs name. âIsnât she that witch who captured me and the other princesses?â
Aerith nodded gravely. âShe came here completely without warning. We fought to protect the town the best we could but⌠it wasnât enough. She took over, and Leon, Yuffie, Cid, and I were some of the only survivors that made it out alive. It wasnât until Sora and his friends defeated Maleficent that we were able to take our home back and start rebuilding it.â
âOh,â was all Kairi said, even though her thoughts were practically exploding upon hearing all this. She wasnât positive, but she had a strong suspicion that Maleficentâs conquest of Radiant Garden had been the event that had somehow caused her to be cast out of her former home in the first place. She didnât know how exactly, or why her memories would have been stripped away from her when Aerithâs seemed to be completely intact, but it made sense, given that it had been enough to drive most of the cityâs other residents out. Still, that didnât explain how she had ended up in the Destiny Islands in the first place, but she supposed that was a question for another time.
For now, their brief travel through the city had come to an end as they reached a seemingly small home tucked away between several others. However, upon venturing inside, Kairi was surprised to see that it was much more spacious than it appeared to be. A large computer mounted the wall on one end of the main room, a round meeting table filling out the center and still leaving ample space for several bookshelves and other collections of various items. She marveled in silent wonder at the almost impossible space as she followed Aerith into it, realizing that aside from the two of them, no one else seemed to be there. UntilâŚ.
âAh, Aerith, there you are! First to arrive back, as usual. I trust your patrol went well?â
âYes, it did, Merlin,â Aerith responded dutifully to the wizardâs seemingly disembodied voice. Confused, Kairi looked all around for any signs of him, though sure enough, Merlin himself soon materialized before them in a burst of colorful magic.
âThere, that should do it!â the wizard exclaimed, mostly to himself as he brushed a bit of dust off of his shoulder. âForgive me for the abrupt appearance, my dear, I was just putting the finishing touches on the training grounds for our soon-to-be Keyblade trainees.â
âSpeaking of trainees,â Aerith grinned as she stepped out of the way. âI happened to find one of them while I was out on patrol.â
âWell, what a spot of good luck that was!â Merlin exclaimed excitably as he stepped up to shake his newest pupilâs hand. âYou must be Kairi. Iâve been expecting you for quite some time now, though I donât blame your relative tardiness on you. Yen Sid does have a terrible habit for rambling for far longer than necessary, which Iâm sure was exactly what he did before sending you off here.â
Kairi almost laughed at the wizardâs bout of witty humor, though she held it back in favor of maintain the proper respect for her new teacher. âI-Iâm very glad to meet you, Master,â she said with a humble bow. âItâs an honor to be training under someone as wise and powerful as yourself.â
âOh, huff to all that puffery!â Merlin scoffed with a wave of his hand. âYou donât have to be so formal around me, my dear. Just calling me Merlin will suffice.â
âR-right,â Kairi nodded, somewhat embarrassed. âSorry.â
âNow, now,â the wizard said with a good-natured grin. âI can tell youâre feeling a bit anxious about this undertaking, but fret not. Itâs been quite a while since Iâve taken any pupils in under my tutelage, but I can assure that you I am nothing if not a fair and competent teacher. And from what Iâve heard of you thus far, Kairi, Iâm sure youâll be quite a receptive, model student. Why, by the time weâre through, I guarantee youâll be well on your way to becoming a true, bona-fide Keyblade Master!â
This assurance did the trick in finally setting Kairi at ease. Ever since Yen Sid had tasked her with this training, she couldnât deny that she had been worried about it for more reasons than one. She had only the barest knowledge of how to use her Keyblade, and even then her skills were minute at best. She was nowhere near the level that either Sora or Riku were on, of that she was certain, and though she wanted to strive to accomplish the strength they both knew, she couldnât help but fear that she never would. After all, she was already so far behind both of them, weak and under-skilled, a novice through and through. She would certainly have her work cut out for her to even just become competent with her Keyblade alone. But to hear Merlin voice his vote of confidence in her so early on gave her just enough hope to think that maybe starting from the bottom and working her way up to the top might not be so difficult after all.
However, before she could properly thank the wizard for his kind words, Kairi was all too quickly reminded of the other major misgiving she had when it came to her training the moment the door burst open behind her. âAlright, gramps,â Lea trudged into the house, apparently disgruntled as he glared over at Merlin first. âIâve been looking all over town for that portal you opened up, but I havenât been able to find it anywhere! What gives? Is this some sort of a secret test or something?â
âNo, actually, it wasnât,â Merlin pointed out patiently. âThe errand I sent you on was for the sole purpose of finding and bringing your fellow pupil here.â
âButâŚâ Aerith interjected with something of a wry grin. âIt looks like I beat you to it, Lea.â
Lea prepared to fire back a sarcastic retort, though he immediately stopped short the moment he spotted Kairi standing stiffly beside Aerith. âOh⌠h-hey, Kairi,â he greeted, his tone quite awkward compared to the cool confidence it usually carried. âL-long time no see, huh?â
Kairi took in a deep breath at this, her lips pressed into a thin line as she kept a cold, scrutinizing gaze on the former assassin. She knew, based on what she had been told, that he wasnât a Nobody anymore, nor did he carry any further ill will towards her or her friends. But as far as Kairi was concerned, that was all just hearsay. Because when she looked at Lea, she still saw Axel, the man who had kidnapped her, who had dragged her away from her home again, all for the sake of hurting one of her closest friends. And even if all that was said and done and in the past now, Kairi still couldnât help but harbor some mistrust towards him all the same. âYeah,â she answered flatly before pulling her sights away from him quite intentionally.
Lea seemed to start at this, almost as if he wanted to say something else to her, though he didnât get much of a chance to before Merlin intervened. âWell, its good to know the two of you are already acquainted with one another!â he exclaimed brightly, though it was clear he didnât know exactly how they were acquainted in the first place. âNow, if youâll excuse me, I need to check over the area Iâve prepared for the two of you to train in one final time. Be back in a jiff!â And with a simple wave of his wand, Merlin disappeared in a puff of magical smoke to do just that.
âAnd I should probably go out and find Leon and the others,â Aerith remarked as she began to head out herself. âTheyâre usually back by now, unless they got held up by something. Either way, Iâll see the two of you around!â
Kairi almost spoke out to ask Aerith to stay out of nerves alone, though by the time she decided she didnât particularly want to be left alone with her former kidnapper, the older girl had already stepped out the door. An uncomfortable silence filled the room almost immediately, with Kairi quickly diverting her attention towards a nearby bookshelf in an attempt at distracting herself away from Lea. She hoped that the next several minutes until Merlinâs return could pass in that silence, but of course, the former assassin couldnât just leave her well enough alone as she would have preferred.
âSoâŚâ Lea began, leaning against the nearby wall as he tried to put on a casual front. âH-how ya been?â
âFine,â Kairi answered tersely, forcing both her expression and her tone to be apathetic and unyielding.
âYou feel like youâre up for this whole training thing?â
âMm hm.â
âYou really think that wacky old coot can actually teach us anything when it comes to Keyblades?â
âYes.â
Leaâs coy smile fell as even his attempt at reaching Kairi through humor fell. In fact, his attempts at striking up an actual conversation in general seemed to be getting him nowhere as she would barely even spare a simple glance over at him. So instead, he decided to go with a route he wasnât entirely used to taking: being genuine. âUgh, Kairi, look,â he sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose as he pressed against the wall. âIâve been thinking about this ever since the old man told me we were gonna be training together, so I might as well just come out and say it: I⌠Iâm sorry.â
Kairiâs frigid manner quickly broke at this, mostly from just how much it surprised her. âW-what?â she asked, finally looking over at him fully.
âI said Iâm sorry,â Lea huffed once more, clearly swallowing his pride as he spoke. All the same, his expression was earnest, perhaps even a bit remorseful as he elaborated on his initial apology. âYa know, for the whole⌠kidnapping you thing. To be honest, Iâve sorta been sorry about it ever since I did it.â
If you really had been sorry, then you wouldnât have done it in the first place, Kairi thought rather crossly upon hearing this, though even so, she said nothing as he continued.
âBut since I canât really undo any of it now,â Lea frowned, scratching the back of his neck as he looked down. âI want you to know that⌠well, I regret a lot of things that Iâve done in the past. And what I did to you is pretty close to the top of that long list of regrets.â He paused for a beat as he crossed his arms, still clearly not satisfied, even despite his sincerity. âJust figured Iâd lay all that out on the table before we really get the ball rolling here. So⌠are we good?â
Of course, Kairi didnât answer this right away as she continued staring at the former assassin, trying to wrap her head around everything he had just said. In her few brief past encounters with Leaâor rather, Axel, at the timeâshe had only ever seen him act callous and arrogant and cunning, a personality befitting one of Organization XIIIâs cold-hearted cronies. And yet here he was now, standing before her showing guilt, remorse, honestyâthings that, even despite her still-lingering uneasiness, Kairi didnât doubt was genuine. Yet even so, she still didnât know if she had it in her heart to forgive him, especially when she remembered exactly why he had kidnapped her in the first place. The fear and danger he had brought to her was one thing; but the fact that all of it had happened simply out of Axelâs malicious attempt to use her to get to Sora, to hurt Sora, was what Kairi just couldnât look past after just a few mere words of supposedly earnest regret.
And she was more than prepared to tell him exactly that too, with all of the honest, pent-up frustration and anger she had to give. Or at least she would have had not both of them suddenly disappeared into thin air entirely without warning.
Fortunately, they reappeared just as quickly, though when they did, they found themselves in what felt like a different world from the wizardâs house entirely. The pair now stood within a vast, dense forest, with large, lush trees stretching out for as far as the eye could see, their wide branches reaching up towards a cloud-speckled blue sky. The entire wood was drenched in silence, no birds singing or crickets chirping as only the gentlest of breezes rustled the leaves of the trees. It was quite a beautiful place, though all the same, something about it felt strange, ethereal almost, and their abrupt arrival was more than enough to leave both Lea and Kairi in utter confusion as to how they got there in the first place.
âWhat in the worldsâŚ?â the former assassin muttered incredulously as he looked around.
âWhere are we?â Kairi wondered aloud, though her question didnât hang on the empty air for too long before receiving an answer.
âA marvelous question, my dear!â Merlinâs voice suddenly broke through the otherwise quiet wood. The wizard himself was nowhere to be found, something that only bewildered his two new pupils even more as he began to explain. âBehold! Your very own training grounds, created by yours truly, of course. In this magical realm, time stands completely still, which means that youâll both be able to hone your skills and abilities with almost no time at all passing in reality itself. Its quite brilliant, donât you agree?â
âSo what, weâre just supposed to hang out here, knocking our Keyblades against a bunch of trees until you decide weâre pros at it, gramps?â Lea asked, flashing a sardonic smirk as he called back to the unseen wizard.
âIâd watch that sharp tongue of yours if I were you, my boy,â Merlin said, clearly disgruntled by the former assassinâs playful teasing. âYouâd be much better off saving that cutting wit for the battlefield instead. Let that be your first lesson.â
âExcuse me, Merlin,â Kairi cut in, much more politely. âBut Iâm afraid I donât really understand either. Exactly what do you want us to do here?â
âWhy, I figured that would be quite obvious,â Merlin remarked. âA training grounds is for the purpose of training, is it not? So here, youâll both have ample time and space to do just that. In fact⌠I see no reason to not give the two of you a⌠running start, so to speakâŚâ
The pair exchanged a somewhat worried glance as the wizardâs tone turned rather ominous. They immediately realized what he had meant, however, when out of nowhere, a sizable horde of shadows sprung up from the ground, surrounding them both instantly.
âHeartless!â Kairi gasped, startled as she took a frightened step back away from the twitching creatures.
âMirages of a weaker subset of them, yes,â the wizard mused from wherever he was. âBut still, they should prove to be a suitable test for me to gage the level of your current abilities. So, letâs see what tricks both of you have up your sleeves! And remember: Iâll be watching!â
âGreaaatâŚâ Lea deadpanned as the Heartless began to move in. âAs if this whole thing couldnât get any more creepy. But no problem; this is just a little case of pest control.â The former assassin smirked as he called forth his pair of chakrams, sparks already bursting around them in anticipation for the battle ahead.
âAh, ah, ah!â Before Lea could lash out, however, his usual weapons suddenly disappeared in two puffs of bright smoke almost as soon as Merlin spoke out. âIâm afraid there is a strict policy against using any weapons ASIDE from Keyblades in this realm. After all, thatâs what you both are here to learn how to wield in the first place, correct?â
âUgh⌠youâve gotta be kidding me, old manâŚâ Lea groaned, exasperated as he took up a weaponless defensive stance instead.
âKeybladesâŚâ Kairi repeated thoughtfully to herself as she looked between the pair of Heartless inching towards her and her own hand. Slowly, she reached forward, recalling the same movement sheâd seen Sora and Riku pull off to summon their own Keyblades many times before. And yet, despite her own attempt at getting her own weapon to materialize, for some odd reason, it just wouldnât appear.
Lea found he was facing a similar issue, for much like Kairi, he had only ever summoned his own Keyblade once before. The effort and subsequent lack of a response frustrated the former assassin even further, to the point that he ended up simply kicking one of the Heartless that leapt at him first away with his boot. Still, it hardly kept the creatures as bay as they persisted towards the pair, neither of whom really had any sort of means of defending themselves against them with their Keyblades as absent as they were.
âThis is stupid!â Lea finally shouted angrily, glaring up at the sky. âHow are we supposed to fight these things if both of our Keyblades are no-shows, huh, gramps!?â
Surprisingly, Merlin didnât offer a response to this, not giving either of them any sort of hints on how to proceed through this perilous exam. So instead, Kairi decided that there was only one immediate option left for them now: running.
âForget it!â she exclaimed, pushing her way through the horde of shadows to break through their wriggling line. âJust come on!â
Lea didnât argue as he followed after her, effectively fleeing from the Heartless as they ran deeper into the forest. Of course, the creatures made sure to give chase, diving into the shadows and speeding after them, forcing them to run even faster just to outdo them. Neither of them had the faintest idea as to where they were going, and even if they did, the woods itself seemed to constantly be shifting and changing all around them, disorienting them even more. Eventually, the forest maneuvered itself in such a way that it ended up cutting their escape off, trapping them between a tight thicket of trees on one side, and the encroaching group of Heartless on the other.
âTch, cornered,â Lea said, scowling the Heartless down as they both cautiously backed away from them as much as they could. âGot anymore brilliant ideas over there?â
âHey, at least I had an idea!â Kairi countered harshly. âI guess weâre just⌠gonna have to fight them with our Keyblades!â
âOh, yeah,â the former assassin scoffed, rolling his eyes as he held his hand out inseriously. âBecause summoning a Keyblade out of thin air is just soooo easy and-â Lea cut himself off with a gasp when, completely out of the blue, his fiery Keyblade suddenly flashed into his grip just in the nick of time. âWell, I stand corrected,â he remarked, a brazen grin crossing his features as he poised his weapon to attack. âNow weâre talkinââŚâ
Without any further hesitation, the former assassin rushed forward, blindly and rather haphazardly swinging his Keyblade at the opposing Heartless. There was little skill or finesse to his movements, but his brute-force attacks still managed to get the job done in downing several of them, though still more came to take their place in the wake of their defeat. All the while, Kairi simply stood by, watching Lea fight with an increasing sense of rising fury. In truth, she found she was angry at several things all at once: at Lea for being able to summon his Keyblade with such ease, at herself for not being able to so much as even call upon hers, at this test as a whole for proving just how of a disadvantage she was at, even compared to the former assassin. And as one of the Heartless managed to skitter past Lea and make its way towards her instead, Kairi found herself unable to contain her anger over just how unfair ever single part of this whole ridiculous situation was any longer.
âKairi!â Lea exclaimed in alarm as he noticed the shadow rush for her. âLook out!â
The former assassin moved to take out the attacking creature himself, though ultimately, he found he didnât have to. For in a flash almost too quick to catch, a bright, colorful Keyblade appeared in Kairiâs hands and with one single, swift swing of its radiant edge, the Heartless before he was no more.
âW-whoaâŚâ Lea remarked, genuinely impressed, though Kairi herself didnât take a moment to revel in her accomplishment. Instead, she continued acting on her frustration, rushing into the fray with Destinyâs Embrace tight in her grip. Despite how mild-mannered she usually seemed, the former assassin couldnât deny that his fellow pupil had an odd sense of urgency and ferocity in the heat of battle. Things that not only completely caught him by surprise, but instantly forewarned him that, regardless of whatever he may have thought of her before, she was not one to be underestimated.
All the same, both of them were quick to fall into the steady flow of the fight, their stances keeping them back to back as they rounded out what was left of the surrounding Heartless. Overall, they did well to cover each other, though their swings were largely still uncalculated and unskilled, and their maneuvers sloppy to the point that their stamina was quickly drained. But fortunately, just as exhaustion was starting to wear down upon them both, the Heartless finally petered out, marking the end of their first, rather arduous test.
âWell now, Iâd call that a wrap!â Merlin announced across the wood as the pair finally paused to catch their breath. âFor beginners, I must say that you both preformed admirably, though you certainly have much to learn in the art of the Keyblade. Fortunately for you, thatâs what Iâm here for! All the same, Iâll give you both a generous pass on your first exam. And might I add that you two make a surprisingly handy team! Training together will do both of you a great deal of good, I can already tell. And with that, Iâll give you both a chance to rest up until our next exercise. For now, feel free to explore this realm, as well as your own abilities, to your heartâs content. Iâll be back to check in on you before you know it!â
âHey, no rush, gramps!â Lea called back to the wizard, even though he was no longer actively listening in on them. âEspecially if you have any plans of sicking more Heartless on us.â
Kairi almost laughed at this, though she was quick to stop herself, instead opting to let her Keyblade disappear as she turned her attention back on the forest instead. It seemed as though stiff silence was about to fall upon the pair again, but this time, Lea was quick to fill it instead.
âH-hey, so⌠back what I was trying to say before we were so rudely interupted,â he began with a huff, though his manner soon turned serious once more. âI really am sorry about what I did to you. I⌠I know its probably not gonna be easy for you, but⌠I hope you can manage to forgive me for it eventually, even if thatâs not anytime soon.â
ââŚYouâre right,â Kairi sighed, crossing her arms. âIt really wonât be easy for me to forgive you.â Surprise, and what almost looked like genuine dejection washed across Leaâs face, and though Kairi wanted to revel in that, she found she ultimately couldnât as she continued slowly, sadly. âIâm just⌠trying to understand how you could do something like that, how you could drag me away from my home and try to use me against my best friend, and then just⌠turn around and act like none of that means anything anymore just because you say you want to help us! Everybody keeps saying that youâve changed and that youâre a good person now, but how do I know that?!â
âBecause,â Lea interjected, his tone and expression both surprisingly hard. âMaybe youâd understand if you knew why I was willing to go as far as kidnapping you in the first place.â
ââŚW-what?â Kairi asked, both confused and appalled all at once.
Lea sighed, running a hand through his crimson locks. âI⌠I wanted to get Roxas back,â he admitted, looking to the ground morosely. âIt was all I could think about. Iâm pretty sure losing that kid drove me half crazy. Crazy enough to come up with a hairbrained scheme that, if Iâm being perfectly honest with myself, probably wouldnât have even worked. See, Roxas is Soraâs Nobody, so, I thought⌠I thought that if Sora lost his heartâŚâ
ââŚI-it would bring Roxas back?â Kairi finished, shuddering at the thought of Sora losing his heart again. Even so, her tone couldnât help but soften all the same when she heard the sheer longing in Leaâs voice when he spoke about his lost friend. This was a side of the former assassin she had never seen before, one that she found she couldnât truly be angry with, no matter how much she wanted to be.
Lea nodded, though he shook his head soon after. âIt was a dumb plan. The only reason I got you involved was because I knew youâd be more than enough to lure Sora in. But then IsaâI mean, SaĂŻx had to go and stick his nose where it didnât belong andâeverything just got screwed up from there. Though I guess, looking back, the whole thing was pretty screwed up in general, huh?â
âI canât argue with thatâŚâ Kairi frowned, rubbing her arm.
âWanna know the worst part of it all?â Lea asked, leaning up against a nearby tree as he looked deeper into the forest. âFor the longest time, I tried telling myself that what I did was what Roxas would have wanted. Guess it was the only real way I could justify it all to myself. But⌠knowing what I do now, I donât think that could be any further from the truth.â
Needless to say that Kairi had no idea how to respond to any of this. She had never really considered any sort of personal motivation behind Axelâs actions before, and until now, she had never cared to. She had always just assumed he had been acting on the orders of the twisted Organization he had been a part of. But now that she knew that it hadnât been for them, but for Roxas instead, it was as though her entire perspective on the former assassin had shifted. Kairi still wasnât sure if she was willing to go as far as to excuse his slights against either herself or Sora, but she was willing to admit something that she hadnât before. That perhaps, in all her close-minded anger, she had only believed that she was being treated unfairly by having to train alongside Lea in the first place, without even realizing that she had been the one to treat him unfairly all the while.
âAxâLea,â Kairi quickly corrected herself, her tone even and sincere as she addressed him. âTo be honest, I⌠Iâm still not sure if Iâm ready to forgive you just yet.â
âHey, no worries,â Lea said with an amiable wave of his hand. âI get it. Take all the time you need.â
Kairi couldnât hold back a small sigh at this. He really was quite hard to dislike, though not even for a lack of trying. âThank you,â she nodded earnestly. âStill, just because Iâm not forgiving you yet, doesnât mean that Iâm not willing to meet you halfway. Which means⌠Iâm willing to be part of the âhandy teamâ that Merlin said we make,â she extended a hand out towards him, offering him a small, if not reserved smile. âThat is, if youâre up for it.â
âOne thing you should know about me,â Lea grinned, genuinely glad this time as he met her hand in a solid, solidifying shake. âIs that Iâm up for anything. Got it memorized?â
âYeah,â Kairi chuckled, amused. âI do.â
The former assassinâs smile widened at this, though it quickly faded out as their handshake ended and he looked down to her again. An odd sense of concentration filled his expression as he stared at her in scrutinizing silence, almost as if he was searching for something he had lost. Admittedly, his tight focus on her made Kairi somewhat uncomfortable, which was why she didnât hesitate to speak up and address it just when it felt as though he had been staring for too long.
âUm, Lea?â she asked, tilting her head in confusion. âWhat are you looking at?â
âH-huh?â Lea blinked, shaking his head as if to clear it. âUh, i-its nothing. I just⌠I could have sworn I sawâŚâ he trailed off, his brow furrowing in thought before he shook his head once more. âNever mind. I think I was just trying to remember something I forgot.â
âOh?â Kairi implored, somewhat curious. âLike what?â
Lea frowned, genuinely perplexed as he glanced back over at her again. âDonât know,â he said truthfully. There was a hint of what sounded like sadness in his tone, though he was quick to replace it with his usual casual manner as he began walking on ahead into the woods. âIâm sure itâll come back to me sooner or later, though. For nowâŚâ he grinned wryly as he glanced back over his shoulder at her. âThe old man said this whole place was basically ours to explore. You feel like taking him up on that offer?â
âOne thing you should know about me,â Kairi quipped, essentially mimicking the former assassin with a playful smirk to match his own. âIs that Iâm also up for anything.â
âIâll make sure to get that memorized then,â Lea laughed as he began leading the way onward. Kairi couldnât help but chuckle herself as she followed after him, realizing that she was much more at ease than she had been in quite some time. When she really thought about it, it was less what the former assassin himself had said that had led them to the relatively stable place they were in now, though that had been part of it. Instead, Kairi quickly realized, what had brought about the newfound fledgling camaraderie between them had been her deciding to let go of her own resentment and anger, perhaps not entirely, but enough to make peace between the two of them. It was a humbling thought to say the least, to make some sort of amends with her now-repentant kidnapper. But for the sake of their important training, and perhaps even her own peace of mind, it was a necessary sacrifice to make, for now at least.
All the same, the thought of just how strange, perhaps even impossible it was that she was now working alongside someone like Lea, who had chased her, captured her, effectively caged her, had all but drifted to the back of Kairiâs mind as she easily walked alongside him through the woods. What thoughts filled her mind instead, was the possibility that perhaps someday, with enough time and enough effort, the former assassin might actually be able to prove to her that he deserved her genuine forgiveness. They were still quite a ways off from being anything close to actual friends, but still, there was one thing Kairi couldnât deny when she considered Leaâs earnest attempts at apologizing and setting things right:
It was a start. A small start, but a meaningful one all the same. One that she would make sure, above all else, to get memorized.
Next:Â
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Octopeacock, First Date(?)
âOi, whereâre ya takin me, Flare?â  A very confused Farley calls to the half-drow guiding her through the crowd of the city.  The man in question turns back to her and sends her his most charming smile.  âWeâre going on a date!â  He proclaims with a small chuckle and blush as he turns back around, and guiding through the crowd. âW-wait...this is a date?!â  Farley calls out, a full blush on her face and reaching up her ears, she hadnât exactly been expecting this when Flare had asked to see her before the ship trip tomorrow. Some music practice, a mug of cider, sure⌠but when did he have time to plan this?   He NEVER plans ANYTHING!.  These thoughts and more raced through Farleyâs head, and they led to to how she got into this mess in the first placeâŚ
--- Flare HAD been unusually quiet since their mission, and the entire party thought the ring might not have worked, and each of them considered talking to himâŚ.especially Farley.   But when they had gotten back to the city, Flare turned on his heel and walked up to Farley without making eye contact. âH-hey...Farley.  Before we head back out onto the water tomorrow⌠would you come with me for a bit?â  Flare then looked to her with the nervousness of a small girl and it did not help that he was pretty enough to charm a bear out of its cave. Farley actually found it difficult to respond, when she felt a hand push her forward.   Looking back, she saw Gust and Chalice nod and wave for her to go with him.  As she turned back, to Flare, she stuttered out.  âS-sure, where are we goi-  Wahhdafuk!â Farley yelped as Flare grabbed her hand and held it in his own, just like she had grabbed his when they had their heart to heart and gave her the most radiant smile.   âGreat,  letâs go!  Weâll see you guys later tonight!â  Flare said as he dragged Farley into the city. âRight...so...what do people do on dates?â  Farley thought to herself, coming back to the present as she looked to the responsible for such a wide spectrum of emotion in her since meeting him.  Before she could voice her question, Flare came to a stop and looked up to the building they stood in front of.  Farley followed his gaze and read the sign that read âSPAâ among a bunch of other fancy lingo.  âOh right...the peaco- Flare talked about Spas before left on the mission.â  Farley remembered as Flare looked to her with a smile and a wink that made her heart skip a beat.   She didnât understand, she saw him wink at plenty of people, most occasions trying to score a discount on something they needed, so why did this one feel different?â âSo, are you ready to get pampered, Mon Amie?â  Flare asked with a slight hint of sultry undertone that passed Farley by.   âUh...sure?  I donât know what that is but Iâm sure if you like it, it canât be so bad, right?â  Farley offered, to which Flare chuckled and nods before leading them in. ---- All in all, this pampering is justâŚ. a very weird experience to the druid so far.  She had her reservations when after Flare paid for them she was led into a room and told to strip down and put on this overly large towel..  Flare simply nodded encouragingly at her as she was guided into this steamy room sheâs in at the moment.  The human that had helped her had called this place a âsauna.â  Whatever a sauna was, it was very humid and hot, and was making her sweat. Farley sighed, Flare had to have his reasons for bringing her here, right? Farleyâs thoughts were interrupted when she heard a door opening behind her, but when she turned around in shock, she saw nothing but this screen that reached the ceiling.   âRight in here, My Good Man.â  a gruff feminine voice said to⌠someone? âAh, thank you so much darling, Iâve been needing this!â  Farley knew that voice anywhere.  Flare.  A gruff grunt was all the reply that was given as Farley heard Flare lean back, and the felt a slight pressure on her back, for a moment.   âAh!  Sorry, whoever you are!â Flare called over. âFl-Flare?â   Farley croaked out in shock.  Flare gasped, Farley could tell, before responding  âOh, Farley!  So they put us in neighboring rooms!â   Flare then sighed in relief, before calling over again.   âSo, what do you think of the sauna, Farley?â Farley then saw the indent of the screen near to her, but they werenât back to back like before. Somehow...this was less preferable after the shock of the happening.  Farley thought to herself before responding back to the question.  âI...I donât know. Iâm not sure what the point of a âsaunaâ is. âWell, a sauna helped you seat, as Iâm sure youâre experiencing, but the heat also helps with muscle relaxation and helps clean your pores.  Iâve also heard it helps breathing by clearing up our airways,â  Flare begins listing out the many benefits of the sauna, and Farley inched a bit closer to the indent in the screen. Â
Closer, closer... âLastly, it helps detoxes your body- Oh?  That you, Farley?â  Flare cuts himself as Farley leans against his back through the screen.   Immediately she felt more blood rush to her face, but she was a bit happier, a bit less lonely in this room by herself. âY-yeah, itâs me.  Donât move, though.   I canât see in this blasted steam so Itâs nice to know Iâm not alone kinda.â âS-sureâŚ.whatever you want, FarleyâŚ.â  a more nervous Flare responded, to which Farley chuckled.   âAre you blushing, Peacock?â  She says, an attempt at teasing the usually dauntless paladin.   âIt-...Itâs just the steam!  Yeah No Iâm completely fine!â  Flare defended himself weakly, prompting another small chuckle from the druid.  âLiarâŚâ Farley says softly, though the hem she got in response tipped her off that she had been heard, not she minded really. âSo Flare, is this âPampering?â or is there more to it?â  Farley asked, to which Flare immediately laughs.  âOh my dear friend⌠this is merely the beginning!â âOh Aerith, what did I get myself into?â  Farley murmured before looking down and seeing a wilted piece of green vegetation on the floor that she was sure wasn't there before.  In fact it looked a teensy bit famil-
âOh shiteâŚâ
âSomething wrong, Farley?â Flare called over, his voice a bit heavier as he relaxed more.
âErm...itâs nothing, donâ worry bout it.â Farley called over, doing her best to put as much confidence into the statement.
âI get the feeling I shouldnât believe that. Wonât you tell me whatâs bothering you?â Flare asks sincerely.
âItâs nothin I canât handle on my own.â Farley calls back over as she quickly realizes that her and Flareâs stuff was placed aside for safekeeping. Remembering where it was, she resolved to go and get a spare leaf and was on her way out the door when the door opened and Flare was standing there looking concerned, a towel wrapped around his waist for modesty. Farley shrieked and took a few steps back, doing her best to hide her face from Flare. âDonât look at me, not you!â   Farley yelled over her shoulder as she backed up.  A hand grabbed onto one of her own.  âFarley, whatâs wrong? Why should I not be looking at you?  Youâre beautifulâŚâ Flare began, taking a step forward.  Farley shook her head.  âNo, youâll think Iâm just some freak...youâll just think I- !â Flare cut her off as he hugged her to him.  As soon as Farley got over the shock at this much physical contact...she realized Flare was shaking, and that her shoulder was getting water dripped on it. âNo!  Donât say I wonât like you!â  Flare choked out, doing his best keep his outburst under control, but by the trembling of his hands, he wasnât doing a very good job.    âIâm an absolute idiot in most things and what I feel for you in new...but itâs definitely not something I could call dislike! Not ever⌠I saw my mentor get disintegrated in front of my very eyes, and to this day whenever I go to sleep I relive that horrific moment the minute I close my eyes.   I think youâre so amazing...but to hear you say that you think me shallow enough to not like you because of whatâs under some silly eyepatchâŚ..that hurts more than anything else.â  Flare breaks the hug but keep his hands on her shoulders as he looks at her square in the eyes, the streaks from his eyes glistening, even as he smiles for her.
âI will not force youâŚ.but know that I wonât run away, Farley...itâs far too late for that!â  He says with a chuckle, before trying to back away.  Farleyâs hands snap up and keep his arms there, wanting to relish in the touch a bit longer.   âYou and your honeyed, silver tongue of yours, peacock.  Fine...But you said it...itâs too late fer you to run...Iâll use my roots on ye if you try!â The druid replies as she reaches up and moves her hair out of the way of her eye. Flare, to his credit and by his word, didnât flinch or recoil in disgust as he saw and empty eye socket marred with scar tissue..  He simply tilted his head a bit.  âYour god did this?â  He asked as one of his hands came up to trace around the scarring. âYes, another reminder of how foolish I was in trying to trick my god.â  Farley said stoically.  Flare continued to marvel at it before realizing why he could even see it.   âWhat happened to your eyepatch?  The leafy one?â  Flare asked, to which Farley showed him the shriveled up green remnant of her eyepatch.
âItâs actually just a leaf that I use one of my spells on to form it into a patchâŚa wise woman taught it to me as my journey was just gettinâ started. But, even with the little trick I do, it is still jusâ a leaf, it shrivels up like any plant would in this heat and humidity. Speaking of which...how long are we supposed to be in here fer?â
A deep clearing of the throat brought both the half elves to the entrance of the steam room.   âI trust ye can contain yerself fer the rest of the treatment, lover boy?â  The dwarf woman said, looking accusingly at Flare who immediately blushed and coughed.    âY-yes, erâŚ. I was justâŚ. Leaving.â  Flare stuttered out before shooting an apologetic look to Farley.   âIâll...see you when weâre done, Farley.â âOh...r-right. See ye laterâŚâ  Farley says as she hides her eye behind her hair again.  As Flareâs footsteps leave her audio range, followed by the dwarfs, the human that brought her in here came back none the wiser as to what occurred.   âMy my, the steam room worked wonders on you! Look at that flush!â  The woman, Aella, Farley thinks her name was, remarked before pulling Farley along with her to a different room, this one containing a sort of bed-like table situated in the middle of it, another counterlike table in the corner with a bunch of bottles with labels Farley couldn't really make out from this distance.  After Aella closed the door, she bid Farley to lay face down on the table, to which Farley nervously complies.
That nervousness quickly dissipated, however,  when Aella began to knead and dig into her back, undoing knots Farley wasnât even aware she had.  âSweet Aerith- AH! That hurts, donât stop! By the godsâŚ.â  Farley moans as she feels so much ache and stress she had just been unconsciously carrying all this time just vanish with this womanâs ministrations.  Is this what has Flare so hooked on these Spas?  Even Farley could see the merit in this âpamperingâ, now.  Farley almost begged her not to stop the massage, but the woman simply smiled and said that it was time for the last part of the service, which floored FarleyâŚ.there was even more past that?
Farley was then led by Aella into a room with a fully drawn and steaming bath, to which she eased her way into. She had found a hot spring or two in her travels, but none of them smelt this flowery. That was a strange bit...this would never happen in natureâŚ. But nature also wouldnât ease away all her aches and pains like this spa had, so she had to give with her take, she supposed. Farley let out a sigh as she finally was submerged up to her shoulders when there was a knock at the door.   âEr...come in?â Farley called out, to which the doors swung open to reveal Aella carrying a deep green length of fabric. When Farley asked what that was for, the aide simply smiled.   âThe gentleman you came in with requested I bring this to you at once.  âSheâll know what to do with it,â  is what he said.â
Farley took the fabric, which when she was feeling it felt like a heavy silk, inside the folds Farley found a note with a flowery script.  âThis should last until we can find you a moreâŚ.permanent solution to your problem, Farley.â With Regards   Like-Like, Flare.
Farley felt another blush coming on as she read the note a few more times, but she couldnât help but smile at his edit, she didnât even know why. It just brought her joy to see him correcting himself like that.
After placing the note aside for safekeeping, she took the silk back into her hands. Â It had been awhile since she had to tie a knot, especially since she hadnt had to snare an animal in weeks, but after a bit Farley managed to tie a makeshift bandana around her head and right eye. Â Â Despite how heavy the material felt, it actually let air circulate nicely, it wasnât noticeably stuffy. Â Though, now that it was in front of her face, she could see small tear marks. Â Â âThat fool tore one of his outfits to give me this?! Â Of all the foolish things for that pacock to do! Â Sheâd have to scold him for that later...she didnât want him ruining his outrageous outfits for her comfort! She couldnât possibly be that selfish, thatâs where she had to draw the line and put her foot down!
StillâŚ. It was nice of him to do, she supposed.
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Time to wonder if other characters that this blog enjoys could solve the Kira murders
Belial would win. He's the archangel of cunning
Tbh I believe that Siete could do it too. Especially considering Siete isn't his real name, right
They're both gonna outplay Light tbh. Siete for the good of mankind, Belial for his own amusement
Lu Woh could be difficult, I can see it going either way. But he is a clever boy and he is technically kind of immortal, so
Not sure if Sandalphon could solve them, but he would murder Kira
Lucilius would solve them immediately and not tell anyone, because he doesn't care
Do you have thoughts about the FF VII gang in this regard?
ohmygo--
i think you're right, yeah. though also it's easy when most of the characters we discuss are immortal. or Siete.
But i don't even know for the humans characters like say, the dragon knight squad. I feel like only Siegfried would figure out who Kira is and would survive because he always covers his face when he's investigating. I feel like Aglovale and Tor would figure out who Kira is but i don't think they'd survive it, especially with Aglovale being a public figure. Lamorak COULD discover who Light is but he'd try to fix him and offer his help and honestly that's the worst type of options. all the rest i feel would either not figure him out or would easily get killed while trying to find him.
As for the FF7 gang, that's an interesting one. I genuinely don't think most of them could figure it out in general, but they might survive it out of sheer luck. that said they'd help one another so while the surviving odds are low, if one of them figure it out the rest will carry out the revenge if needed.
My exceptions in term of specifics:
-Reeve will figure it out and will survive. He's smart, he knows where to dig, and he hides himself when he's investigating by going under cover under his robot fursona that can't be killed. Genuinely he's the one person i'd trust with catching Kira if he doesn't do an overdose out of caffeine drinks.
-Aerith might figure it out, might not survive, but would find a way to bring Kira down with her. Not really because of investigation reasons but because Aerith can feel when people die and return to the Lifestream and can feel their departing thoughts, so if Kira kills people who have him figured out she may end up learning about it, or she could drive conclusions from the killing patterns. But her name is easily known so if she gets exposed it's over, but i feel like Kira would be blindsided by her and how sweet she looks when she can be cutthroat. And if Aerith gets killed i believe in her ability to influence people to avenge her and/or to fuck Light up in the Lifestream if she has to.
-Vincent might not figure it out unless he has help, but he will survive. He's immortal and fate loves to make him suffer and outlive everyone he loves, so this would be a mess for him. But i don't think he'd manage to get through without help. Hell in his own game Reeve is the one constantly helping him figuring things out DLKJDLKFJ Vincent would NOT do it on his own. Not to mention he usually only investigate things in his area of expertise and i don't think he'd invest himself too much into the case to start with.
-Red XIII/Nanaki will survive, unsure he'd figure it out alone. Might depend exactly at which point you take him from his personal journey because he specifically starts out the game refusing to go by his birthname and letting anyone call him whatever the fuck they want. He still have a strong attachement to his birthname so it's not a case of "new name will override the birth name", esp when he let anyone call him anything. That said late game might be trickier since it's when he reclaims his birthname and make sure everyone knows about it, even if he still lets his friends call him Red. so it may depend. But yeah i don't think he'd investigate alone, and he probably wouldn't be interested with figuring it out if not for his friends asking, so there's that too.
-The Turks would survive by virtue of the fact none of their names are their birthname and those are codenames to start with (it's why in Before Crisis, the game focusing on the Turks all of them are actually refered to by their weapon of choices, or why Cissnei (who goes by Shuriken in BC) also talks about wanting to tell her real name to Zack one day.) But in term of who would figure it out i only really trust Tseng. Though it's not like the rest aren't smart, but they can get easily distracted.
-Sephiroth will not care to figure it out unless Kira starts to get in his way, but i feel like he can use Jenova to try to get to know who it is if he does get in his way -- and probably would try to secure Kira at his sides if not killing him right away. And he would survive out of pure "this guy can't fucking die" energy.
Everyone else i think would not figure it out alone, nor would survive if exposed, and all they can really rely on is on being stealthy but aside from Cloud refusing to talk about himself, all of them either got caught doing things before or are just too loud to not be caught.
so yeah this is my final take--
thank you for asking ;3c
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Second Chances
Read it on AO3
Fandom: Final Fantasy VII
Characters: Cloud, Shelke, Genesis, various others.
Summary:Â Following on from First Encounters, Shelke helps bring certain things to light about their new acquaintance. When Cloud finally finds him again, his attempts at getting answers are less than fruitful.
Written for @strifesodosweek, though this oneâs mainly platonic again.
...
It happens while Genesis is away, and no one knows where he's gone. It isn't the first time that's happened, and they weren't too bothered about it, because everyone had things they didn't want to talk about, something that Cloud understood more than most.
It's one of those rare occasions when there's more people around than there aren't, too, which he'd be suspicious of if it weren't for how sometimes, that's just how things are.Â
Vincent's talking to Tifa, Yuffie's stroking Nanaki's mane, and Cid's taking a drag of a cigarette by the door when Shelke comes walking in, looking vaguely uncomfortable and saying that she had 'information that she believed that everyone present might benefit from'.
...
"The man who is now staying here, I believe that he is the one that Deepground referred to as 'G'," she continues as soon as everyone is settled down. "He introduced himself to Cloud as a SOLDIER First Class, am I correct?"
Cloud nods. He doesn't look her in the eye.
"G... as we now know him, 'Genesis', was the origin of Deepground, in many ways, according to all of the information I was able to obtain on the matter, and the one whose cells were used in order to create the Tsviets. Shinra seems to have made extensive attempts to delete his existence from history, so what I was able to find was... at times inadequate, and often inconclusive, but does point to the indubitable fact that the Genesis we know may be the very same as the SOLDIER who despite Shinra's efforts, will agree caused a considerable amount of damage and loss of life up until some years ago."
It took effort for Cloud to not let the ringing in his ears overtake him, to keep listening to what was being said, to not grip the table so hard that Tifa was going to have to get a new one.
Tifa sighs, and he looks up, to see her sharing a look with Cid, who looks grim, but...
"Yeah, I figured as much," the man says. "I mean, with a name like that? There's only so many in the world, y'know? And damn, but I was around in those days - they can pretend it didn't happen as much as they like, but the Genesis war was a thing, and people tend to talk when there's something going on like a SOLDIER gone rogue. All hush-hush of course, but what wasn't."
His head- his head...Â
The world flashed green, just for a split second, enough to put him off balance.
A voice-
You were a test subject in Hojo's new experiment.Â
The monster has been harvested, and can be discarded.
"...thought I knew him from somewhere."
Tifa's voice snapped him free, but he still felt the sweat on the back of his neck. Her words registered to him only vaguely, as he tried to remember how to breathe again.
"Cloud?"
He shakes his head.Â
"I'm fine," he says. Vincent doesn't look much like he believes him any more than Tifa does, but the last thing he wants right now is for them to start fussing over him, when they have bigger problems at hand than whatever his memories are up to this time. He's thankful when they just let the matter drop.
"Like I was saying, I thought I knew him from somewhere. His face seemed familiar, you know? And his name, somehow."
"So this guy waltzes in here like he doesn't expect anyone's gonna remember him, is that it?"
"I don't know, something about this seems-"
"He saved Raye and Este before I could get to them," Cloud cuts in, his eyes still squarely on the surface of the table and no one and nothing else. It's almost as though he's hearing someone else speak, and doesn't know whether to hate himself for speaking up for the person he didn't know if he could trust any longer, or feel relieved that he was saying it at all. "If all anyone's got is incomplete data and rumours," including me, he added silently, even now, I wouldn't rely on anything I remember from back then unless someone else is able to back it up, "then... even if nothing else... we can't judge him like that until we know everything."
When he eventually looks back up, Shelke's eyes are on her hands, crossed on her lap.
"I merely thought that additional information would be useful," she said. "Especially if something came up where a lack of prior knowledge would have caused further divisions."
...
Genesis doesn't return for several days, and it's long enough for some of the others to start wondering if he'd merely been toying with them, stringing them along, using their hospitality.
Cloud doesn't know what to think, and he doesn't really know what he wants to think, either. The two images in his head - that of the man who saved a couple of kids and their dog just because he was there, and that of someone who'd had a war named after him - clashed, irreconcilable.
He finds that his feet are taking him to the church in Sector Five, and wonders what Aerith would make of all this. What Zack would make of it.
The last thing he expects to find in the church are black feathers. His heart stops, hand going for his sword - the last time he had seen feathers like these... it hadn't been here, but Loz had been here, and fought Tifa, too.
A quick scan of the rest of the church suggested that there hadn't been another fight here, that nothing was out of place, that the pool of water that Aerith had called down that cured Geostigma was still as it should be.Â
He finally sees the source of the feathers when he looks up to check that the Buster Sword is still in its place, and he feels himself go cold at the sight.
The wing was on the wrong side. Misshapen, compared to Sephiroth's.Â
Instead of silvery-white hair falling straight down, the owner's hair was red, and fell over black and red leather, what little could be seen from behind, and with the way that the winged man was hunched over.
Cloud puts one foot in front of the other, and sees Genesis - because there's no one else it could be, no matter how much he wishes it wasn't - tense at the sound.Â
"Shelke told us a few things," he says as he walks. "And we figured out a few other bits by ourselves."
He pauses several feet away, but Genesis still hasn't risen from the pew. He hasn't even turned to face him. A nervous tension pools in Cloud's stomach at the idea of Genesis, who had been unarmed the last he knew, taking Buster Sword and using it to turn on them all.
"What are you even doing here?"
When Loz had come, it was supposedly to find him, although he'd taken to fighting Tifa and stealing their materia. He had no such understanding of this man's motives. Not anymore, at least, if he ever had.
"My soul, corrupted by vengeance, hath endured torment... to find the end of the journey in my own salvation and your eternal slumber." Genesis let the church echo for a few moments before saying anything else, the words ringing familiar to Cloud, but not explaining anything. "I came to pay my respects, of course."
The wing shook itself out slightly, before settling down again.
"You knew Zack," he says, and it isn't a question. It's the only thing that fits.
"I... suppose you could say that."
Genesis says it in such a way that Cloud knows there's more to it, that it's complicated, and he wants to take the man by that stupid coat of his, and shake him until his feathers fall out along with some answers.
But he doesn't. Because Aerith's flowers aren't that far away, and he knew better than any that her presence still hadn't truly left them. There'd already been enough fighting in this place.
"I spoke up for you," Cloud hears himself saying. "I thought you deserved a chance."
Perhaps some part of him had intended it to come out as anything other than confrontational, but if it did, then it failed - it sounds like nothing more than an accusation.
"All in all, a terrible decision, really," Genesis says flatly. "I could list off any number of reasons why you and everyone else I've come into contact with should hate me." Something about the way he said it gave Cloud no doubt about that, either. "Unfortunately for you, however, I have promises to keep, and none of them include dying any time soon."
Genesis stands, and the wing stretches out as the man sorts himself out, head tilting up, as though attempting to judge the size of and distance to the hole in the roof.
"Promises?" Cloud asks, reaching for something, anything, to help him understand. "What sort of promises?"
"Nothing you need to worry yourself over, Cloud."
Genesis' head tilted, and Cloud wondered why hearing this man say his name already felt so different from when Sephiroth had  - there was something similar but off that he couldn't quite put his finger on.Â
Then again, that was Genesis all over, it seemed. Full of contradictions, constantly shifting. Like fire.
The wing flaps once, and before Cloud can react to say or do anything else, Genesis is gone, leaving a trail of feathers floating down in his wake.Â
He walks over to where the man had been, half expecting to see something there, some kind of trap, but finds nothing.
There is, however, a single Banora White apple sitting on top of a few black feathers in front of the Buster Sword, and Cloud almost thinks that he can feel a memory on the tip of his tongue before it disappears on him, like a whisper on the wind.
Zack... I hope I made the right decision.Â
A single feather fell onto the water's surface as he walked back to the open doors, creating ripples as the wind blew it this way and that.
...
AN:Â I don't often write about 'how do the gang find out about Genesis' past', but I do feel like it should ideally be handled really carefully, and yeah, if people hadn't thought about it and then it comes up later, then there are going to be issues there.Â
Timeline-wise, I'd also put this as before 'Spar With Me', which gives an idea that things do indeed get better.
#ffvii#ff7 stuff#final fantasy vii#strifesodosweek2018#genesis rhapsodos#Leona fic#somehow Genesis finds a way to make LOVELESS aspersions even when he isn't there#now THAT is some skill
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i dont know if this is allowed but u said we could still send in asks if were unsure ?? i really love ff7 and ff15 and i was wondering if u had any headcanons of who in those games would get along the best n worst? Im sorry if this js against the rules x
Yeah, you can still send in requests if youâre unsure if it conflicts with the rules or not! This doesnât really conflict with the rules so Iâd be happy to give you some headcanons on this, but I donât have that much.
Instead of just doing the main FFVII game, Iâll do the entire series (excluding Before Crisis), since that means there are more characters to choose from!
SFW under the cut.Â
Gladio gets along with Angeal the best. Iâm not even gonna lie, as soon as I saw trailers for FFXV, I was immediately reminded of Angeal when I saw Gladio. In an alternate world, the two of them are definitely relatedâŚno doubt about that.
But itâs not just because they look similar. Their personalities are very complimenting of each other, too. I think Gladio would really respect Angealâs views on honour. I can see the both of them training or sparring together, and Angeal would definitely bring Gladio into the training room while the 2nd classes were out.
Thereâd be a lot of playful banter and name-calling between these two. Angeal always makes fun of Gladio for never passing up the chance to flirt with the ladies, even though his pickup lines never really work, and Gladio finds it funny that a guy like Angeal is really gentle and into gardening.
And yes, Gladio always points out that his sword is bigger than Angealâs, if you know what I mean.
Gladio would also really get along with Zack Fair, Barret Wallace, Tifa Lockhart, and maybe even Reno and Rude. Heâd get along the least with Sephiroth, Genesis Rhapsodos, Vincent Valentine, and Cloud Strife (sort of, theyâd have some conflict but not too much).
Prompto gets along with Zack and Yuffie the best, and the three of them are often seen together. At first, he was a bit freaked out by Yuffie, since she was rummaging through his stuff, and when he asked her what she was doing, she just pointed at him and said: âYou better not be hiding my materia, spikey!â
Zack and Prompto are kinda like the two fun older brothers to Yuffie, and all three of them are usually joking around together or playing games. Yuffie brings them on her materia hunting missions a lot and some of the places she brings them are beautiful, so Prompto actually has fun because he gets to take photos!
Prompto gets along with Zack because he likes that heâs full of energy and always positive. He knows Zack will always be there for him when he needs a shoulder to lean on, or when he just wants to play around and be silly.
Prompto gets along with Yuffie because sheâs also full of energy, and she never puts on an actâsheâs not afraid of being herself, and sheâs extremely confident (a bit cocky, too). He really likes all the nicknames Yuffie gives him, and he likes how heâs never bored around her.
I can really see these three being good friends. Yuffie and Zack would always make Prompto smile, and theyâd just be so much fun to be around, and Prompto would feel really valued with them.
Prompto would also really get along with Cloud Strife, Angeal Hewley, and Aerith Gainsborough. Heâd get along the least with all of The Turks (especially Reno, heâs an ass), Sephiroth, Genesis Rhapsodos, Cid Highwind, and Vincent Valentine. Â
Noctis gets along with Zack Fair the best. A lot of people would assume heâd get along with Cloud, but I disagree, because Cloudâs really closed off and can be hard to talk to at times. Zackâs an open book and brings out the good in a lot of people, and he kind of reminds Noctis of Prompto at times.
He loves how Zack is always energetic and having fun, and thereâs a lot of playful teasing and inside jokes between the two. He also loves how he can talk to Zack about anything, whether it makes sense or not, and Zack will always be open-minded.
Noctis hates Zackâs flirting though, since he gets enough of that with Gladio. He really doesnât understand how Zack is actually successful in his attempts to flirt with women, because to him, itâs just hilarious and embarrassing. He rolls his eyes whenever he hears Zack use: âDid it hurt? âŚWhen you fell from heaven?ââbecause heâs heard it about a million times by now. Shit gets old real fast, Zack.
I can definitely see Zack, Prompto and Noctis being a golden trio or something. Those three would get along so well together, and Prompto and Zack together would just beâŚso much sunshine, and Noctis couldnât help but getting a lot more dorkier when theyâre both around.
Noctis would also get along with Vincent Valentine, Aerith Gainsborough, Yuffie Kisaragi, Angeal Hewley, Reeve Tuesti, and maybe Barret Wallace. Heâd hate Sephiroth and Genesis Rhapsodos, and heâd really dislike all of The Turks (especially Reno, again, because I can definitely picture Reno being a cheeky little shit and making fun of Noctis all the time).
Ignis gets along with Vincent Valentine and CrisisCore!Sephiroth the best (yes, I know this is cheating, but still).
Vincent is a reserved guy whoâs quiet for most of the time, which Ignis can deeply appreciate, but heâs also interesting to talk to and trustworthy, and he cares for others. Vincent is mature, as well, and I can see the two of them having a lot of conversations together and respecting each other.
CrisisCore!Sephiroth would also bond with Ignis, in my opinion. The two of them are both composed, and have a professional demeanor, but I can picture them both joking around with each other (of course, thatâs in their own wayâSephiroth has a very dry sense of humour and Ignis is pretty witty and sarcastic, and they can both appreciate that about each other).
Since Ignis and Sephiroth are both really intelligent, I can see them having a lot of conversations about serious topics, and learning things from each other. Theyâre both well-spoken, calm and collected, and I see Sephiroth respecting Ignis a lot, and the other way around, too.
The relationship that Ignis would develop with Vincent and CrisisCore!Sephiroth would be a very mature one, full of mutual respect and trust. It would be very different to the relationship we see him having with Noctis, Prompto and Gladioâbut it would still be one heâd treasure. Â
Ignis would also get along with Reeve Tuesti, Cloud Strife, Zack Fair, Angeal Hewley, Tifa Lockhart, and Aerith Gainsborough. He wouldnât get along with Yuffie Kisaragi, The Turks, Genesis Rhapsodos, and of course, heâd hate current Sephiroth.
#damn i really want this to be real and to happen#especially yuffie and prompto oh my god i loved writing that especially#asks#requests#ffxv imagines#ffxv headcanons#ffvii imagines#ffvii headcanons#ffxv#ffvii#mine#anonymous
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What's your thoughts on when the plate falls and Cloud went to go help Tifa?
My thoughts or my analysis? Cause youâre getting the latter anyway lol I love doing action analysis, thereâs so much happening and getting the chance to slow it down is great for getting a fuller picture.
Ok, spoiler warning for ppl who havenât played â do I still need to do this? Eh ok, (I tag FF7R spoilers as final fantasy 7 remake spoilers) and itâs gonna be long.
Also, this is one personâs interpretation of the scene, so if you disagree thatâs cool and weâll agree to disagree.
Youâre also gonna have to excuse the janky quality on some of the screens, Iâm grabbing them from Youtube and itâs frustrating af trying to get the exact moment I want.
Other analyses if anyoneâs interested.
Shinra HQ vision scene (Cloti/plot analysis)Â
Chapter 3 (Cloti reblog)Â
Tifa character analysisÂ
Aerith Resolution (plot analysis/theory â I should probably update this since Iâve had other ideas since then)Â
Train graveyard (not really an analysis, but I got some sweet screenshots of Cloti)Â
Clotiscrew tunnel analysisÂ
Cloti reunion analysisÂ
The Promise AnalysisÂ
Andreaâs approval (Cloti ask response)Â
Leslie analysis (not mine, but a good read)Â
Cloti action touchingÂ
Aerti friendship analysisÂ
Cloti body language chapter 3Â
Cloti healthy disagreementÂ
Cloti post heliboss battle (chapter 15)Â
Clerith playground sceneÂ
Now, strap in and enjoy the ride.
Recap time!
This is a 6m scene I'm going over, so I'm gonna skip anything not directly relevant or I'll be here all night lol
So despite our brave heroes best efforts the plate is coming down. We get a power slide from Rude, a call from Tseng (who times it so perfectly was he watching?) and some cloti.
First thing we see if Tifa looking distraught. She has no idea how to stop the plate from coming apart and from the way she's looking at this consol wouldn't know what to do even if she could work the computer. They were so close to winning and now defeat is about to stomp all over them and kill everyone she loves. Tifa is someone whose driven by the desire for those she loves to be safe no matter what. This is a crushing moment for her.
Murderous Cloud is murderous (and kinda hot). I mean, we know he's got very little reservations about killing people in cold blood because he's SOLDIER!Cloud when it comes to a fight, but I do like the deadly intent we see on his face at different points in the game. He looked at Johnny a bit like this back in chapter 3 and now he's looking at Reno the same way. He means business.
And then he doesn't because Tifa's in trouble and we all know Real!Cloud prioritises Tifa's safety above everything else. That's not me saying he's no longer SOLDIER!Cloud, but the difference between the last screen and this is that he was fully in that badass merc mode about to kill Reno because it's what badass mercs do, whereas this is Real!Cloud urging him to refocus all that skill he's got into protective ability and go save the woman he loves.
I get some people might not see the distinction between the two personas, but it's actually really easy when you break it down. If it's about Tifa then Real!Cloud is gonna push for dominant action to keep her safe. If it's any other situation then he's just gonna let SOLDIER!Cloud do what he needs to. Sometimes it's a more conscious battle between the two and sometimes they co-operate. That's how a fractured psyche works within the context of Cloud's character. Don't believe me? You see both of them on screen at the start of chapter 8 in the church. Real!Cloud is the one saying âYou okay, buddy?â
How many times can you count that we get an 1st person pov with Cloud in the whole game? Like literally looking through his eyes? Because this is 1st person pov. We are Cloud at this moment in time and he's rushing Rude, but still takes a glance at Tifa. I don't think this happens at any other point. This game is a 3rd person game. We're over everyone's shoulder. We don't get in their head to see through their eyes. This is deliberate framing. We obviously can't see his face or his reaction, but the fact we're seeing this moment as Cloud and he's chosen to look at Tifa is a big thing.
So Rude's pushed the button and Barret's yelling. Cloud actually looks more halfhearted in this swing than I expected. It's like Barret's fury just isn't enough to get his blood boiling lol
He's about to go after him anyway, when Tifa's voice stops him dead. I can't think of a moment in the game where someone else calling for him to stop actually makes him stop.
AH! Honestly this is such a move! Romantic hero hello! I know it's a classic move from Cloud â which is kindly weirdly implemented since we first saw it after OG, but it's been retconned as one of his signature moves with Tifa and only Tifa.
Also! EYE CONTACT! I'm gonna scream about Cloti eye contact until my own eyes cross lol they do eye contact so damn well! The only other person who got Cloud to look him in the eye was Andrea Rhodea lol Everyone else it's either confrontational eye contact or total avoidance. Cloud and Tifa have good eye contact. This highlights how much they trust each other. Even though Real!Cloud is afraid of letting Tifa know how weak he really is, he's ok with her looking him in the eye. He wants her to see the real him.
Now, I know some people go on about Tifa's chapter 3 comment of âCloud, you're scaring me/your eyes didn't used to look soâ as a negative thing. I've already explained why this is fucking bullshit, and I'd like to add that if Tifa wasn't comfortable with him in combat situations or otherwise she wouldn't make eye contact with him. Eye contact is fucking terrifying! You're able to see so much. These two aren't afraid to look in each other's eyes, even with their âI don't think he/she likes meâ misunderstandings.
And just to cap it. They both smile to reassure each other they're ok.
Ok, so Reno and Rude are making their exit. Barret tries the FF7 boomer version of turning a computer off and on again by shooting it. Then Tseng proves he's either psychic, a stalker or just dramatic af by appearing on screen at just the right point to answer Tifa's question.
And look at her face! Whoever said she's a heartless bitch can stfu forever! This is the face of a woman who is broken by what's about to happen! She's lived in that slum for five years. She probably knows every local by name, and takes time to actually get to know them too. She cares. So much. She doesn't want anyone hurt. She's pleading for their lives. Pleading with her enemy. Who literally smirked when he said âthere's nothing you can do nowâ. Tseng has no conscience.
Just adding this to be a butt. This is Cloud's reaction to Aerith when he sees her....what reaction? Yeah...
Then he asks where she is in his SOLDIER!Cloud way.
So Aerith gets dragged away and explosions start happening. A siren goes off. Barret and Cloud turn away from the computer. Tifa turns and says, âNo no no no noâ and Cloud immediately turns back. His eyes widen and he looks a bit lost for a moment. There's nothing he can do for her and he's not got the first clue anyhow, and there's no time. It's hitting him just how much she cares. I mean, he knew, but he didn't know, you know?
Notice the awkward hand there? Yeah, that's an âI don't know how to comfort you, what do I do?â hand gesture. Cloud's literally never seen Tifa like this. She's always trying her best to remain optimistic. She fights hard to protect what she loves. She doesn't fall to her knees defeated.
I'm actually loving all the extra insight all these analyses are giving me into just how reserved, how introverted, how determined Tifa is. She's had a hard fucking life. Born in a dust bowl, lost all her friends to the big city, saw her father murdered, almost died, her town got burnt to the ground but she still somehow managed to pick herself up and build a new life. She did that on her own. Nobody got her to Midgar. When she arrived she was lucky Marle took care of her. She could've been left alone with no support system. She got in with Avalanche and built a new family â even though they don't always see eye to eye on method, she also believes in their goal to stop Shinra and save the planet. She's principled and brave, focused af. But she's not unbeatable. Stuff gets her down. She tries her best to be cheerful, but doesn't always succeed. She keeps her problems to herself. But this? This is too big. This has broken her. She can't stay up and Cloud doesn't know how to help. Not emotionally, anyway.
OMG HE OFFERED HIS HAND!! I didn't see that before!! (Check the spot where his name is, his hand is between Tifaâs hair and arm, palm open.)Â I knew he grabbed her by the arm and hauled her up when she didn't move, but he's actually holding his hand out for her before that!! She's too in her head to do anything, though, and I don't think Cloud really understands that. Any devastating feelings he had about personal tragedy he's locked away because they literally broke him. It must be distressing on some level for him to see his own emotions mirrored in Tifa. I said before the urge to comfort her starts at the beginning of chapter 13, but maybe the first spark of that is this moment here, when he can't do a thing for her, except pull her along behind him and hope he can keep her alive.
There's some really nice still shots in this game and this is one of them. I don't really have anything to say about it. I mean, we knew Cloud had both hands on Tifa's shoulders so he could direct her where to go and she's not really with it until the moment the debris falls in front of her and shocks her out of her stupor. Cloud's focused on the job at hand, no time to worry about anything but the next obstacle. By keeping both hands on Tifa's shoulders he's ensured he doesn't have to keep checking on her to make sure she's with him. He's basically piloting her because she's not capable of decision making for the moment.
Someone tell me, do action backhugs count? That's non-optional embracing right there. How many of you have seen this exact moment? Because I have literally been replaying the same 4s clip to get the screen for this bit and this is the first time in about 10 replays that I stopped it here. This is the between 1 second frames when the debris falls.
I mean, this is what a bodyguard actually looks like. Cloud's focus is all on keeping Tifa safe. He pulls her close to him, offers strength while she's feeling weak. He is literally using himself as a shield for her. They're such a balanced couple. When one is weak the other is strong for them, and whatever flaws they have they accept. They really are just a great couple!
Probably the worst screen I've ever grabbed lol
I was trying to figure out the moment he took her hand but I can't quite stop on it and it's just a touch too much out of frame. Instead, I got this. EYE CONTACT. I don't need to explain it again, right? We get the whole Cloud/Tifa eye contact deal by now.
Although, at the same time, that's a fucking scary shot of Cloud lol reminds me of that meme with Rinoa and Squall where she says he's the best looking guy there and it's all pixellated lol
Ah! I remembered why I was trying to get their hands, to see if Tifa grabbed his first or he took hers. But I could see through the playback that he took her hand. He initiated contact.
Yknow, I know people often compare the whole one half is always the summoner or mage and the other half is the warrior, but this screen right here looks a lot like another FF couple.
Tidus and Yuna.
I mean...do I have to say more?
Cloud looks behind to check Tifa's ok â I mean she's not but you get the point. Still getting Tidus and Yuna vibes from this moment tbf. This is the exact same type of sequence they had of them in FFX-2 when Yuna's dreaming Lenne's past and she and Tidus replace Lenne and Shuyin. They're running down a corridor and Tidus looks back at her. I mean, seeing how this type of comparison is usually only reserved for the whole mage/warrior pairing, it's strange that their body language here mirrors Squareâs first fully voice acted installment. At the time the graphics were cutting edge and the cut scenes are still lauded as some of the most beautiful storytelling. Strange that Tifa and Cloud could have this comparison to Tidus and Yuna, especially with the whole Suteki da ne always being used to prop up a certain ship.
Anyway, Cloudâs checking on Tifa cause heâs totally not in love with her and wants to make sure sheâs safe. You get the idea lol
I'd like to point out that Cloud doesn't â despite popular opinion â have hold of Tifa's jubblies. His arm is under them, wrapped around her ribs, which is actually a very secure hold for him since he's trying to hang onto Barret and keep hold of Tifa too. You'll notice she's not exactly paying attention to her own safety â which makes sense since Cloud literally had to haul her up when she wouldn't move. She's not in a good headspace during the end of this scene, so he's being very protective towards her.
Conclusion
Another great piece of action! I mean, does it really matter if these two are in the trenches or just hanging out? They have a synchronicity that's impossible to deny. They balance each other in pretty much every single way there is for a couple of be two halves of a whole. The FF10 comparison is a new one on me, especially since I don't look at two titles and try to see what about each one is like the other. They're both different and unique with their own charm. But, the second I caught that screen of Cloud pulling Tifa along I was immediately hit by the thought of âThat's what Tidus and Yuna doâ, so I couldn't not mention it.
We get a clear look at how devastated Tifa is immediately after the realisation hits that sector 7 is about to get crushed. She's just gone. Checked out. If Cloud hadn't stepped up to save her she'd have died. She wouldn't have got herself over to Barret in time and he would've died going to get her and get them back to the zip line. This is why it's so important that Cloud picks up the slack. He was strong when she needed him to be. She's strong for him later when he becomes weak. They really are two halves of one whole.Â
I love that Tifa gets her own character development. Sheâs not just âthe love interestâ. Barret is basically a supporting character here, but we know heâll get his turn in Corel and he does get his own moments to shine in Midgar, but this is cloti, so sorry dude, next time.
#final fantasy 7 remake spoilers#cloti#more action touching#more eye contact#final fantasy 7 remake analysis#I knew I missed a tag
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Final Fantasy 7R review
I finished the game this morning and I already have regrets that thereâs nothing left for me to do besides replay and anxiously wait for news of the next installment. I want more. I want to not have finished it yet. I need to know what happens next, not just in the updated story, but with the game mechanics, too. Iâm happy the team is taking their time to make the game as good as it deserves to be, but on the other hand I wanna throw a toddler tantrum demanding the rest of my game!Â
Beware, spoilers.
The bad stuff
To be fair, not a lot from where Iâm sitting. Iâve seen people bitch about textures and how the scrap yards donât look dynamic enough and some stuff is flat, but seriously, why are yall looking at the walls? Theyâre the least interesting thing about the game and youâre just nitpicking. The graphics overall were amazing and I stopped multiple times just to rotate the camera and take in this massive city we actually get to really explore for the first time ever!
I have to admit a slight disappointment in the amount of space, verbally, that was happening. There were times where I expected characters to make comments and they said nothing. Things were overlooked or just not addressed and it wasnât even anything plot related, just a point where there could have been dialogue and it didnât happen. It wasnât often, but those few times the air was left dead I noticed it. The most notable time was in chapter 17, right after Sephiroth appeared on the gangway. Now, I get them being too shocked to say anything when heâs right in front of them, but after, when they separate and fall into two groups? Nothing? No comment? Tifa, I definitely expected to say something in a shocked tone, but even after they found Cloud again, she didnât mention it. It was like the moment didnât happen. I know the other times nobody else but Cloud saw him, but this time they saw him, and heâs linked to Tifaâs past too, so she definitely shouldâve had some kind of comment in that empty space.
That was the only major point, but other small ones were when people were talking and one character remains silent. The only one I expect to never speak if he doesnât have to is Cloud. Because itâs Cloud. Everyone else should have something to say. Like when they climbed the stairs. If you took the stairs - I was all done in from so many fights and just wanted a break - then you got hilarious commentary from Barret, Cloud and Tifa. It showed how close theyâve become. Cloud made a joke! His second one of the game! If you missed the first, itâs likely because you obsessed over him going on about money all the time and saying thatâs all he cares about when heâs with Tifa. So, yeah, after being shown how the group can talk to each other and banter Iâm hoping Square adds more chatter to the next game. I know some people prefer less chatter, but this is a group of people who are supposed to be shown as friends, so conversation is important.
The other thing that got on my nerves was the mechanics of the weapons upgrade. Unless I missed a shortcut, having to go out of each one and then into the next one instead of just switching over to the next weaponâs skill tree. It took a long time to level things up and I wish there was an option in the auto to just unlock every skill one at a time, so theyâd do it on auto without me having to go in there. And the ATB. That got on my nerves. Iâm lazy af, so Iâd like for action to just pause whenever someoneâs atb fills so I can give them a command and then go back to the battle instead of having one eye on all the atbs. Itâs probably more classic than Square wants to go with it, but having that as a battle option would be nice and a further throwback to the old style of gameplay.
The good
Everything from chapter 3 onwards. The intro chapters were good, too, but I really just wanted to dig into the game and that didnât happen until chapter 3. The VAs killed it! Graphics were amazing! The weapon abilities were fun and added something different to the regular gameplay style of just grabbing the next strongest weapon. Side quests were enjoyable and I wish there was more of them, especially a save the citizens for after the plate fell. That really would've hammered home the tragedy.
The story
Iâve seen people - mostly OG fans - bashing the new elements. Sure, the whispers are a weird angle to come at it from, but the explanation for them, that theyâre trying to maintain the OG storyline, made for an interesting twist on a 25 year old story. Sephirothâs early appearance was just something that had to happen, along with a Jenova fight, because, come on, this section of the OG was like 3hrs worth of content and this is 40hrs, so ofc they had to include new things and it matches with the new storyline and I think people need to release their death grip on the OG storyline and enjoy this game for what it is.Â
I found the ripple effect(?) interesting too. From what we learned, the OG happened in the future. If things hadnât changed thatâs the future everyone was heading towards. Ok, cool, pretty simple.Â
This timeline had small changes. Biggs, Wedge and Jessie survived!? Or did Wedge finally get shoved off a building at the end, I really couldnât tell if he bought it that time, but if he did Iâm mad cause he was adorable. The plate falling didnât have as big a casualty number as originally, either. And Hojo almost spilled the beans to Cloud early, but was cut off, and thatâs the other thing Cloud ignored in dialogue afterwards, but itâs Cloud, so weâll give him a security pass for that. The others ignoring his Ptsd induced freak outs isn't cool though and I expect Square to fix that level of callousness towards him from the others.
Those are the only two changes from the OG. Sephiroth showing up early instead of in Nibelheim doesnât really matter. Heâs his usual cryptic asshole self and his goal is unchanged. The team just knows heâs the big bad earlier now and have a solid goal instead of just randomly wandering after they leave Midgar. So, yeah, does Biggs, Wedge and Jessie living make a big difference overall? Will that ripple from them being alive make further changes?
We also saw that Zack survived because of our team, but the Zack in their timeline is still dead. I think we saw it this way because the planet is trying to find a way to prevent being hit with Meteor and ending up with geostigma, so the OG timeline, everything was still bad. Our timeline gives possibilities for a slightly better future and then the timeline behind it - the one with Zack - offers even better odds, not that weâll see that. Thatâs the timeline I think Aerith will live through, so that way Square can say Aerith lives, just not in the game we play now.
Shipping
Iâm not into wars, so if you love Aerith, cool good for you, I was focused on building affinity with Tifa and Square didnât disappoint! There were so many romantic moments between them! And damn do they have chemistry! I squeed at such a high pitch the dog next door started howling! All the small touches, longing looks, affection, support, trust and OMGOSH IT WAS JUST THE BEST!!! They were so damn cute!!
I have no idea how the game changes if you focus on Aerith and to be honest I donât want to. I think thatâs what I love about the options for that. You can choose and no one can say your choice isnât valid.Â
One thing though, I would like an end to it because itâs 25 years of people arguing and itâs made the entire fandom toxic af and itâs actually the reason I avoid most of the final fantasy discourse because people canât be civil to each other. Square should finally say once and for all that Cloud/ is canon and the other isnât, instead of throwing a bone to them and being all âmaybe if things were like thisâ, like no, pull on your big boy pants, Square, man tf up like Barret on a mission, and tell people who is the canon pairing in this damn game so people can just stfu and enjoy playing it without getting flamed.
This is why I want a FF8R because at least thereâs no doubt who the couple is in that one.
Smol stuff
Iâve seen complaints about new characters being 1 dimensional, but theyâre new characters in a game series thatâs a trilogy, so theyâre likely gonna appear again. Roche seemed added not just to give Cloud a boss to fight in the bike event, but also to show thereâs other SOLDIERs beyond Cloud and Zack and the ones from Crisis Core, which not everyone has played.
Same goes for Leslie. I liked that dude and Iâm interested to see him pop up again. His design wasnât the typical bad guy henchman, easily disposed, thank you very much for playing. He has a story and Iâm betting thatâs not the last we see of him.
Again, same goes for Cloudâs infantry buddies. Iâve not played CC, but I get theyâre from that, so will we see them again at some point? What about other CC characters?
Best Bits
Cloud in a dress. âNailed it, thank you, moving on.â
Cloud dancing. Boy got moves and I wanna see him dance again!
Cloud/Tifa. Complimenting her like a smooth mutherfucker.
Cloud/Tifa Battle couple. They were my absolute favourite fighting combo and definitely kicked all the ass!
Cloud/Tifa. All the shipping bits, but especially jumping off the train and then trusting her to go kick Corneoâs ass. Thatâs how you show you know your girl
Wedge. Kitty momma
Biggs death. Damn you, Square, you got me all choked up.
Red. Specifically the bit where he highfived Barret with his tail lool
Barret. âDamn it, Red.â
Reno. Just Reno in general killed me. Love his conscience though and that heâs not a 1 trick pony.
Tifa/Aerith. Had more chemistry than Aerith/Cloud. Yeah, I said it.Â
Barret and Marlene. Such a good daddy! His expression with her was like a whole different person!
Aerith bitchslapping a would-be rapist with a chair.
Cloud/Tifa/Aerith teamup to threaten Don Corneoâs balls - though I only include Aerith since she was there and she was about as threatening as a cupcake.
Conclusion
I want moar! I really hope the next one comes out soon! Itâs not the same as OG, but has the best bits of OG along with something new to bring in a new generation of fans. The alt timeline angle feels fresh and open to possibilities and Iâm excited to play this game for what it is, instead of comparing it and demanding for the OG like a crusty whisper lool
#final fantasy 7 remake#ffviir#FF7R review spoilers#FF7R spoilers#FFVIIR game review#I fucking loved this#I'm just sad it's over for now
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Beyond this Existence, short 7--Burnout
Recovery is a tedious, nonlinear process. Demyx, Ienzo, and the others living in Radiant Garden's castle have to learn to come to terms with their pasts and their memories, learn to grow, and begin to understand what, exactly, it means to be human. While there is unexpected joy in this, there is also unexpected sorrow.
A series of loosely interconnected oneshots set after Beyond this Existence. Zemyx (Demyx/Older!Ienzo), roughly canon-compliant
Current short: âBurnout.â A tough patient causes Demyx to burn out, which raises some questions as to why he's turned to healing in the first place.
Timeline: at least six months after chapter 19.
Read it on FF.net/on AO3
----
Kailaâs baby was healthy.
It had been a big deal when she was born--it was the first live birth Radiant Garden had seen since the Fall. The world was stable enough that people had the confidence to begin families. Aerith had been abuzz about the pregnancy since the young woman came to them. Demyx had been there for the birth, the vaccinations. Seeing the little girl, now three months old, did give him hope. He wasnât sure if he and Ienzo would ever have a family in the traditional sense--maybe theyâd get a cat first--but he was happy that other people were ready for that step. A new generation, divorced from fear, living in safety. It was almost too good to be true.
Kailaâs baby was healthy. Kaila wasnât doing so hot. The birth had fractured some of the vertebrae in her spine, pinching her nerves and making it hard to walk. It was the sort of thing that required repeat treatment to regenerate and strengthen the nerves, which was something he was still grasping. Aerith had left the new mother in his âvery competentâ hands to go run soup over to old Mrs. Fletcher.
Demyx wasnât doing so hot either.
Heâd felt sick all day, though vaguely so--a little nauseous, a little headachey, and so on. Self-diagnosis was a slippery slope, and the symptoms were way too common to mean anything. âHow do you feel now?â Demyx asked her.
âMy toeâs still tingly, but it doesnât hurt anymore.â The woman flexed her foot.
It didnât help that this was a high cost spell. The more involved things were, the more energy it cost. If he did it poorly, heâd have spent that magic for nothing, and left the patient still sick or in pain. Healing cuts? Cost nothing. Tedious nerve reconstruction, from the base of the spine all the way down the legs? Lots of stress, and he was feeling it; sweat was beading under his arms. âLet me see if I can fix that.â
He felt at Kailaâs aura. Her energy was strong, and tired from spending sleepless nights with the newborn, though he could sense her happiness. He found her spine, down to the place where the break had occurred. Directing the energy and urging it to heal felt like pushing through half-dry concrete. Down the thighs, the knees. A wave of dizziness washed over him, and his concentration broke. He fought the urge to swear. Start again. Aura, spine, hips, thighs, knees--
âI think itâs working. Is it supposed to feel warm?â
Did she have to say something? He tried to smile. âYeah, thatâs the spell taking effect.â He was feeling woozier still.
âYou okay?â She frowned.
It wasnât her fault, Demyx reminded himself. She didnât know how tiring this was. One more time. Aura, spine, hips--
He could feel the nerve endings, each so distinct and fine, like a filament. He pushed a little harder, through a steady-growing pain in his chest, to the very edge of her foot. But getting there was only half the battle--the energy had to be held so it could do its work. Kaila remained silent, still. The back of Demyxâs mouth tasted raw. This wasnât good, but there was no point dropping everything now when he was so close to helping this person.
The sense of heaviness eased from her aura. She wiggled her foot. âItâs gone! You did it.â
Demyx had to actively focus to stay pleasantly smiling, to not hurl all over the floor. âCome on over if anything changes,â he said.
âThank goodness. You have no idea how frustrating itâs been. Like feeling white noise all the time.â
âIâm sure.â
She got off of the treatment table. âEveryone thinks youâre doing great, you know. Iâm so happy Aerith has a partner now.â
The dizziness was worsening. As casually as possible, he leaned against the now vacant table, fighting the urge to collapse onto it.
Kaila reached into her pocket. âThis is for you.â She tried to press the money into his hand.
âYou donât have to--â
âTake it. Please. You must at least need to buy supplies. I wouldnât give it if we didnât have it.â
âThank you.â He set the money aside and tried to breathe.
âNo, thank you. And if you donât mind me saying, you look like you could use a little bit of a break.â She frowned.
âIâll be fine. Itâs an intense spell, is all.â
âWell I surely appreciate it. You have a good day now.â
Demyx watched her leave. He sat on the table and rested his head in his hands. His vision was swimming. Why did he feel so shitty? This wasnât the normal low-magic exhaustion. The wooziness washed over him in little waves. Where was Aerith? How long did it take to drop off some soup? Sheâd have an answer. She always had an answer.
He felt so⌠incompetent. Would he even be half as good as her? He could barely handle the exhaustion--heâd almost snapped at Kaila. He was supposed to be the one in control. Aerith was finally starting to trust him to work unsupervised. And this was how he was handling it?
There had to be something he could take to feel better. What were his symptoms again? Nausea, dizziness, exhaustion, headache, chest pain? Or was it indigestion? Sometimes it was a side-effect of magic use. What would help all that, or some of it? Ginger, for the nausea, willow bark for the pain, maybe a mild anti-inflammatory? Was this also dehydration?
Demyx stood, to cross over to the medicine cabinet, but his knees gave out and his vision abruptly went dark.
The next thing he was aware of was the cool floor against his cheek, and the smell of something bitter. âThere you are. Hi.â
If anything, he felt worse than before, like he was full of sludge.
Aerith crouched next to him, a bottle of smelling salts in one hand. âCome on. Up we go.â Gentle. Soothing. Her patient voice.
Moving was not a great idea. She eased him up on the table and handed him an empty mixing bowl just in time for him to be sick into it.
âI shouldnât have left you alone. That was a lapse in judgement on my part. Iâm sorry.â She took the sick away from him. âWhatâs the last thing you remember?â
âWell--Kaila left--â
Her eyebrows shot up. âYou fixed Kaila?â
Why was she saying that as though it were a bad thing? âYes?â
Aerith exhaled. âThereâs a reason I didnât heal her all at once. Thatâd be a challenge even for my stamina. I thought you were getting low, but you must be completely empty.â
â...Empty?â
âI thought youâd been pushing yourself too hard, but you never complained, so--â She crossed over to the cabinet and started grabbing a couple of things. âYou burnt yourself out, thatâs all. Use too much magic and you actually end up eating into your own metabolism. Kind of like a super mild version of what happened to Ienzo.â
âHow do we fix it?â Demyx was feeling nauseous again.
âCanât so much as fix it as treat the symptoms.â She frowned. âI shouldâve kept a better eye on you. Youâre still finding the balance. Iâm sorry, but these next few days are going to really suck. Why donât you lay down? Iâll get you some tea.â
He was too weak to do anything but listen. He felt her toss a blanket over him, sweet clean wool. He really was so tired. Lying here felt so odd, and off.
âSleep for a little while,â she said.
He slept so heavily and instantaneously that he wondered if she might have knocked him out herself, but this wasnât Aerithâs usual MO. Demyx woke in his bed, of all places, feeling more or less like animated garbage. Opening his eyes was almost too much; the light was bright and piercing.
âWell good morning sunshine,â Ienzo said coolly. He sat in the chair at the bedside, a book in his lap and several on the dresser.
â...Oh, youâre mad,â he said. His voice was hoarse and very soft.
âMoreso frustrated. And that frustration is born from worry.â He reached over and took Demyxâs hand. âI think itâs a touch hypocritical that you criticize me for overwork, and yet you collapse on the job.â
âTo be fair, it wasnât on the job. The job had already walked out the door.â
Ienzo sighed. âHow do you feel?â
âLike the dead. How long have I been out?â
âThe better part of two days.â
Demyx sat up slowly. Nothing seemed to have straight lines. Ienzo handed him a glass of water and a pill he knew Aerith had made.
âShe said, and I quote, âprepare for the worst hangover of your life.â Unfortunately the only cure for it is rest.â He shook his head. âI may not be a healer, but at least I have basic nursing skills.â
Despite a sour stomach, the water went down easily. Demyx tasted something minty in the pill. âA hangover with none of the fun.â
â...Quite.â
âSorry. Iâm guessing this hasnât been a cakewalk.â
âYou vomited several times in your sleep. Hence my vigil.â
Demyx flinched. âYikes. And you stayed?â
Ienzo rolled his eyes. âI have a surprising tolerance for the gross. Especially when it comes to you.â
âGee, thanks.â He leaned back a little against the pile of pillows. âHave you gotten any sleep?â
âSome. Donât turn this back on me.â
Demyx wrinkled his nose.
Ienzo sighed. He took Demyxâs hand, tracing its shape. âI see no reason to chastise you when you know what went wrong,â he said. âBut I wonder... Â why did you do it?â
The medicine was easing the nausea and dizziness, but at the same time made him feel somewhat loopy. âThese people, they need⌠help.â
âTheyâve gotten by without you. They can do it again. At least for a few days.â
Demyx shook his head. âSheâs finally started to trust me.â
âYour competence has nothing to do with the fact that youâve started to put them before yourself. Iâm proud that your capacity for empathy has grown so, but at the same time, Demyx, is that what this is really about?â He leaned forward, trying to catch his gaze.
Maybe it was because he felt so shitty. His eyes were watering.
âIâm trying to understand it,â Ienzo said. âYou stopped therapy so suddenly after what happened in the basement, but Iâm not sure that means youâve healed.â
If he werenât so weak he would have pulled away.
âI think youâve thrown yourself into this so headlong to avoid having to deal with your own pain. It might be guilt, too. You help them because you couldnât help the others.â
âIs this what youâve thought about the past two days?â
âWell--yes.â Ienzo took off his reading glasses. âBut you and I are, at our core, more similar than we thought. Weâll do anything to salve the pain. You know. You donât have to put up a front of recovery.â
âBut youâre okay.â His voice broke. âI just want to be--â
Ienzo pressed his forehead against Demyxâs. âYouâre healing. And thatâs enough. Itâs not quick. Itâs not perfect. And itâs certainly not going to be the same as me. As I,â he corrected. âYouâve changed my grammar, you know that?â
He smiled despite the onslaught of tears. Ienzo pulled him close. He felt so horrible that for a few minutes he let himself cry and be babied. He was reminded of the early days of their relationship, when he was so starved of affection and touch that it was cathartic. This was, in a way, its own relief; the pressure heâd been putting himself under was completely arbitrary. He tried to tell himself that, at least.
It wasnât guilt so much as⌠well⌠what he was worth. He understood heâd been manipulated and taken advantage of and he understood that the awful things heâd done were his responsibility. But for so long Demyx had been a pawn in a bigger game where the gamemaster was always shifting. He was no longer unmoored, but he wasnât stable, either. Healing people was something to hold onto, a constant, a goal to work towards. Music wasn't so forgiving. Music made him think inwardly, which was now ceaselessly complicated.
He'd done the only thing he knew how, after ages of apathy and laziness; he'd made himself useful. He told Ienzo as much. âIf I helped with Xehanort, and I help these people, that has to make this worth it, right? That has to make me worth it?â
Ienzo looked almost startled. âYou neednât destroy yourself to justify your own existence. Especially since you understand morality. You⌠you told me as much.â
âI thought it would be enough.â
âWhat?â
âI justâŚâ He grit his teeth, swallowing a sob. âIâm supposed to be happy.  Iâm human, I have you, I have Arpeggio, I have these bonds with people and yet I⌠I feel like an impostor.â
âI do, too,â Ienzo said softly.
âAnd as much as I tell myself that itâs okay to feel this way, or whatever, I donât know how people donât see itâs allâŚâ
âA ruse?â
âIt feels that way. Like someoneâs going to take it all. Like Iâm going to wake up and itâs all gone. So I guess thatâs why.â
He blinked. âWhy what?â
âHealing people. Pushing so hard. Trying to leave a mark of kindness so this pain isnât for nothing.â
âBut you have to express such emotion healthily. Or else this happens.â
âYouâre one to talk.â
Ienzoâs expression went, abruptly, blank, and while he didnât physically pull away from Demyx, he could feel the walls go up.
Demyx exhaled sharply. âIâm sorry, that was mean--â
The tension eased slightly. âNo. Youâre right. I⌠I donât know how.â
âI donât either.â
âAll this reading, all this study of psychology. I know what is considered healthy. But I donât know how to do it myself.â
âI guessâŚâ Demyx settled back against the pillows. âI guess, itâs like, what feels the most right. Not good. But right. Like, you know, puking feels right, but not good.â
âYouâre still nauseous?â
âVery.â
Ienzo sighed. He smiled, but it was small, and sad. âIf only there were some way to purge emotionally.â
âWell. Talking, mostly.â Demyx doubted there was anything left in his stomach to empty, but he swallowed down the excess spit in his mouth.
âYes. You are right. Maybe we should both go back to⌠talking through things.â
âI think we need to.â
Ienzo leaned against the mattress. âSince what happened in the basement I do feel quite a lot better, but things still linger. I think this will take some time.â
âYeah. It will.â
âCan I lie down with you? Or do you feel too ill?â
âIâm not going to puke on you, if thatâs what youâre asking.â He lifted the covers and Ienzo crawled under. The touch soothed him and took his mind off of his various miseries. âItâs hard to be patient. After waiting so long.â
âFor humanity?â
âStability. What have you.â
âI agree.â Ienzo looped his arms loosely around Demyxâs waist. âAt least weâre not alone in this.â
He breathed in Ienzoâs clean, slightly sweet smell. âIenzo?â
âYes?â
âDo you want to get a cat?â
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