#plus u seen me before loser

[verysium]

BLUE LOCK REVERSE ICKS 😳

😭 i read this as blue lock icks and was about to drag them all through the dirt with a brutally honest character review. but anyways, reverse icks is still a good idea, so here you go anon:

rin has abandonment issues. now before u come for me, let me explain. ever since sae left him, he's been hesitant to let anyone back into his heart, and that's why you mean so much to him. his hand automatically reaches for yours in the crowd so you don't get separated. when he has nightmares and dreams of you leaving, he wakes up, patting frantically on your side of the bed until he finds your body and relaxes. hugs you as if he'll never let go and buries his face into the crook of your neck and just whispers "thank fucking god." and you can see his chin wobbling as he struggles so hard not to cry, but deep down you know he's a very sensitive soul and you're quite literally his whole world.

sae's entire character is a reverse ick. have you not seen that man? he is beautiful. but i'll give u a little scenario: sae attends a charity gala, and you're invited as his plus one. you're busy getting ready in the bathroom, and he just leans against the doorframe, breath hitching when he sees you all dolled up in your fancy dress. coughs to hide his blush when you turn around and ask him for help. creeps behind you silently, his hot breath grazing your nape as his deft fingers reach for your zipper. his hands are callused and gentle when they clasp the back of your necklace (the one he bought for you), and the cold metal contrasts with the warmth of his hands on your shoulders. his heart is beating so fast that his fingers tremble and struggle with his tie, so you fix it for him but when your gaze travels back up his face, you catch him staring down at you, his eyes filled with an intense emotion. your gesture of kindness reminds him of his mother and how he hasn't gone back home in ages and how blessed he is by the gods to have you in his life.

kaiser does the hair tuck thing where he kisses a strand of your hair and smooths it behind your ear. he tries so hard to be a suave and charming gentleman, but honestly he's just an awkward loser. screams like a girl when you watch horror movies together and hugs you so tightly you think your lungs might burst. but then he gradually quiets down and falls asleep in your arms, and you think maybe he's not so bad. he canonically is not a morning person, so when he wakes up, he has the homeless cut 2.0 with the wild bed head and groggy facial expression. also has a weird habit of walking around the house naked. in any other situation, you would've yelled at him to put some clothes on, but his physique was looking extra good today, and you sort of got distracted. he definitely noticed and not-so-subtly flexed his biceps. always tries to make you laugh even though his pick-up lines are terrible and he can't tell a good joke to save his life.

nagi sometimes wakes up before you and pulls your body closer to him. on most occasions though, it's you who wakes up before him and he drags you back to bed. he hates it when you work late and hovers above you like a phantom, waiting for you to finally finish and go cuddle with him. if it gets to the point where you fall asleep while working, he will tuck you into bed and kiss you goodnight. the next morning, you find all your work finished, albeit in poor handwriting. in all honesty, nagi is a genius, and he tries hard for you and only you. if any other person asked them to finish their work, he would've flat-out rejected them.

isagi is good with children but often at his own expense. unsuccessfully tries to make a baby laugh but ends up getting distracted and slamming face first into a telephone pole. now that made the baby start giggling, and he just smiled through tears with a red bump on his forehead, insisting that he was alright and didn't just knock his two front teeth loose. whenever he babysits your siblings/cousins, he ends up doing all the grueling work like changing diapers, taking out the trash, cleaning up after the gremlins. and yet the children will still favor you and not him. tries to act like he's not heartbroken but boy did that sting a little too much.

barou buys you flowers. has a big stupid blush on his big stupid face and refuses to admit that his heart skips a beat every time you look at him. does that thing where he looks the opposite way to pretend like he's not interested before shoving a bouquet into your hands. he's also very protective. holds your hand when you cross the sidewalk so you don't get run over. holds the door open for you every time. tried to make those origami hearts for you, but his fingers are thick and stubborn, and he stayed up all night in a fit of rage because he's not used to delicate work like this. you ended up getting a lopsided piece of crumpled paper that barou insisted was a heart, and you agreed because why would you hurt his feelings?

chigiri knows how to braid your hair. makes you sit in front of the mirror while his slender fingers carefully brush the soft strands. he can get complex too. dutch braids. french braids. fishtail braids. also does that cheesy couple tradition where he braids a piece of his own hair with yours as a symbol of love. most people don't know this, but he's actually a crackhead. sometimes when you're walking down the street, he'll do impersonations of the various people he sees. the old lady at the laundromat. the two aunties at the flower shop. the fisherman near the boardwalk. he even imitated your dad once, and you nearly lost it. he's too funny guys, but you need a sophisticated sense of humor to understand him.

and that's about it. sorry this was so short anon, but my brain is dessiccated this week.

[ptolemaeacles]

♡ becoming hazel callahan's cheerleader gf hcs

pairing: hazel callahan x cheerleader!reader

synopsis: headcanons i have about becoming hazel's cheerleader gf.

notes: … i did rush the ending a bit because i have school and i did not proofread the entire thing but hope guys liked :))))

word count: 1.3k

i'd imagine you guys meet when you decide to join the self defense club that pj and josie were teaching.

she always admired you from afar but being the loser lesbian that she was, she never made a move on you.

eventually, the both of you got paired up to fight. poor baby was so scared she might hurt you, she barely hit you. more like slightly aggressive taps rather than punches.

"c'mon hazel! hit her!" pj yelled from behind you. you had hazel on the ground, crouched over her body. her nose was dripping blood and it was all over her teeth. no matter how many punches you threw her way, she never retaliated. not a single kick or punch was given back to you. the sight of you on top of her certainly wasn't helping her win this fight.

now that you guys were acquainted, she would get so nervous around you. of course she was always nervous around you but more so now since you actually knew who she was.

you guys would actually speak to each other in the classes you shared instead of her just staring at you. (and you taking quick glances because you're a lot more slick than she is)

hazel convinced herself you were pin straight. to her, there was no way someone so hot was gay. (god damn cheerleader stereotypes) so when she heard from isabel that you liked girls, she had no idea what to do. she had no idea what to do even when she thought you were straight but now it was 10x worse.

she started second guessing every compliment, every time your hand brushed past her when you guys were getting lunch, every single time your eyes held her gaze a little too strongly.

you always thought she was cute. even when she acted a little crazy. the whole bomb situation was actually a bit endearing to you, as concerning as that is. while everyone was in the car, yelling at hazel for setting off a fucking bomb on jeff's car, you squeezed her hand and sent a sweet smile her way. that smile alone erased any feeling of guilt or blame within an instant.

and when pj had said hazel had no friends and called her mom a skank, you were the first person running after her. you searched half the school campus before finding her hiding under the bleachers,

"haze, oh my god, i was so worried about you!" you crouched down and brought hazel into your arms. the nickname brought a warmth to hazel's heart. you were the only person who called her that.

"everything that pj said is not true at all," you let go of her to hold the sides of her face in your hands, "forget all that shit about your mom. and you have friends. you have josie, you have isabel and brittany, you have me."

hazel looked up to you slowly with a new look in her eyes.

"i don't want to be your friend." you felt your heart get heavier for a second. hazel leaned in without thinking. she caught your bottom lip between hers and-

she was kissing you. hazel was kissing you. and to her surprise, you were kissing her back.

after the unexpected love confession under the bleachers (typical high school romance), hazel decided she wanted to take you out on a proper date. it's what you deserved. (plus she's not getting caught in the 'u-haul lesbian' allegations crossfire). unfortunately, those plans were postponed.

she never told you that pj and josie lied about juvie or that she agreed to fight the school's star boxer. (you later find out she had no idea she was fighting him too.)

the aftermath of the fight was terrifying for you. of course, you had seen her bloody face before (and had even been the cause of it before) but it was never this bad.

you stayed with her for a long while after that. always taking notes for her in class and coming by her house to check up on her. the other girls would come by as well. it made you happy that they were all there for her, even after the club disbanded.

you opted to sleep over from time to time which she was always appreciated. it quickly got old when you guys could barely hear each other talk over the sound of ms. callahan and jeff going at it.

both you and hazel were in her bed, laying on your backs, next to each other. hazel laid with her hands behind her head, elbows facing outwards, and you laid with your hands on your stomach, palms facing down. both of you still giggling over a joke hazel made about your shared english teacher earlier.

"hey so, uh, i wanted to ask you something." hazel turned to face you, resting her head against her arm on her pillow.

"yeah? go for it." you turned your head to her.

"well, um, i wanted to ask if you wanted to go on a da-" hazel's question was interrupted by loud moans and rhythmic thumping coming from her mom's room.

'goddamn it...' hazel thought. it was jeff and her mom again.

"you know what, never mind, it was stupid."

eventually, the game against huntington arrived. hazel was nervous for the game and she wasn't even playing nor did she care about sports. she was going to officially ask you out. and she wasn't going to let anything ruin it this time. she watched you do your cheerleading routine, admiring your uniform. (she was obsessed with it and wanted to see you wearing it all the time. but not even batman could beat that information out of her...)

once again her plans were cut short, when a frantic pj and josie came up to her in bleachers asking her for another distraction. you were in the middle of your routine when you saw hazel running across the field towards the girls from the club. (you didn’t happen to see the little device she had in her hands)

what confused you even more was when hazel ran up to you mid-routine.

you moved your pom poms in a choreographed motion, the way you had been practicing for weeks.

the girls from the club had been running around in the corner of your eye and you couldn’t tell if it was good or bad. they looked distressed but you had to focus on your routine. that was until hazel came up to you.

she called out your name, loud enough for you to show some concern and put your pom poms downs.

“come ‘ere” she murmured. she wrapped her arms around your waist, slotting her lips between yours.

to say it took you by surprise was an understatement. you tilted your head, deepening the kiss, and brought your hands to either side of her face.

when the both of you pulled away, the mixed groans and cheers finally met your ears. but by then, it seemed you guys had bigger problems.

the fight was chaotic to say the least. the huntington players were known to be ruthless and unforgiving. throughout the entire fight, you and hazel fought back to back, constantly covering the other. more like hazel stared you while you broke a guys nose in. and your mouth definitely didn’t get a little dry when she kicked a guy unconscious.

the fight felt like it had been going on forever, especially with the way your body was aching. you and hazel looked around the field and you see tim getting on the ground, sticking his tongue onto the wet field.

“it’s pineapple juice!” he exclaimed as he got up.

you finally put 2 and 2 together.

you turn to hazel.

“we did all that for jeff?”, you huffed, “god, we’re just as brain dead as the rest of the school.” hazel chuckled before bringing her bloody, bruised hands to either sides of your waist.

“i wanted to ask you something and i’m not letting anyone ruin it this time,” she looked at you with a newfound confidence, “will you go out with me? i know it took me a long time to ask, i was looking for a good moment-“

you crashed your lips into hers, shutting her up. which she took as a definite yes.

taglist: @heartrobynn @masclover111

[bambisnc]

u got me so in love [ft. p.hn]

@ yn : idk sounds like a you problem tbh @ hanni : oh yeah? watch me make it into an us problem rn babe <3

pairing : bsf!hanni x f!reader genre : angst w a dash of crack cw/tw : swearing + uneditted + hints of reader being possessive/jealous + surprise moka appearance! <3 wc : 0.5k

you saw hanni before she saw you. 

however, to be fair, the fact that in every hallway, every room, every crowd in general, your eyes would always, always be constantly in search of her did give you a fair advantage. 

she was pulling someone along by their arm, in that trademark cheerful manner of hers. 

but she was too busy in conversation to notice you staring. 

too busy in conversation to notice how you forcibly immersed yourself into conversation with minji just to appear unbothered.

you almost succeed. 

keyword : almost.

she finally approaches you. the traitor. misusing that beautiful grin of hers to force a matching one on your own face.

“y/n!! you remember we have to be at school this saturday right? for the physics project?” 

you can’t help but be distracted by how she’s still holding some other girl’s hand. you don't think you've seen her before, she's probably new - and your best friend, being the absolute sweet soul that she is probably offered to show her around.

but it's crazy if you think about it – hanni has no shortage of friends and physical touch is how she shows affection. plus it’s not like the two of you are together or anything; she's only your best friend.  

so why does it bother you this much?

you carefully hide the annoyance starting to creep up on your features and shrug noncommittally (a VERY inappropriate response to the question she'd asked). 

hanni looks like she’s finally noticed something. 

“oh! moka, these are my friends!” she gestures towards you, “and side note : this one's for sure the cutest!” “is that how you usually introduce people?” you deadpan; the compliment not doing much to appease the vague ickiness you feel.

“no!!” hanni huffs sheepishly, “minji, y/n, this is the new transfer student sakai moka; she’s in my class!”

before either you or minji is able to reply, the school bell rings and a bustling crowd of students surges through. the 2 of you get separated from hanni and .. moka.

you’re left just a little dazed but aren’t able to dwell much on it when some other classmates/acquaintances/friends engage you in random mindless chatter which you'd be damned if you were even half interested in.

- the next you see the two of them is by the stairwell; both of them standing against the wall, animatedly talking about something or the other. 

could it be that she’s waiting for you?.. 

as soon as the crowd parts enough way to walk through, you, ironically, lose sight of her completely. 

.. so she wasn’t waiting.

the entire occurrence leaves you with a bitter taste in your mouth. 

and the idea of processing whatever you’re feeling seems a little too much for you to be able to handle right now. 

you can't help but suddenly remember when just an year earlier, you and hanni had been sitting together on these same stairs. she'd confessed that she wasn't looking forward to going to the next grade because that would mean both of you would be different classes.

she'd made you promise you wouldn't become best friends with someone new you met. she'd made you promise to only be hers.

too bad you just laughed it off back then.

-

when you check your phone later, a flurry of notifications greet you, all from a certain someone who’s been on your mind quite literally all day.

● hanniiee (cutest bestest most perfect bff) :3 <3

Y/NNN  Y/NNNNIEEE WHERE’VE U BEEN ALL DAYYY IMYYY

oh and omg moka told me the funniest story about her old school you’ll love her smmm fr :((

AWW HOLD ON NO WAY  minji js texted 🤭🤭🤭 is my darling a little jealous perhaps~~ ??  u know ur always my no.1 y/nnie <33

CALL MEEE ALR LOSER

ah shit wait i need to go over to moka’s rn to help w school work

call me when u can tho i’ll be free to pick up anytime !!!

…

but when you call hanni a little later, you’re met with an automated response.

the number you have dialed is currently busy. please try again.

notes : bambisnc comeback no wayyy anyw what if i changed my user back to bambinsc guys ive totally not being having sm thoughts about doinf that + [m.list] song rec : te quiero - kissoflife! <3

𐙚 . regulars : none yet! ⋆

pt.2 <3

[luveline]

𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐫 𝐠𝐟 —send me a headcanon for a character and I'll give my thoughts/ write a little scenario, including but not limited to sirius and his loser gf

r’s flat is chaotic and there’s evidence of her hobbies everywhere (including the bathroom) so for the longest time she was too scared to invite sirius over (because he’s the coolest!!) until sirius basically comforts her and is like baby No!! u are the coolest and i would never judge ur flat or ur abandoned hobbies even the knitted toilet paper doll (omg jade tell me u have seen these they r CREEPY) (also i hope u haven’t already had one like this)

(I googled the doll I don't think I've ever seen one before and they're SO creepy but they're also kinda cute? I kinda love them) (I have not but even if I did ily)

No because Sirius starts thinking you're a hoarder with how vehement you are that he not see your home until he kind of says, in a soft but firm tone, that whatever it is that's so shameful about where you live won't change how much wants to be with you. Plus, we can't have freaky snog sessions at mine. Too many roommates.

Which is a joke but still true. You invite him over with a perma-lump in your throat as he just kinda stares at everything. And you're thinking Oh, my god, I'm a loser and I fucked it and he's gonna break up with me, but he just crouches down and pokes your weird knitted toilet paper doll with a rakish smile.

He wouldn't leave it lie, either, he wants to see your little projects, failed or otherwise, spends hours on your bedroom floor leafing through old sketchbooks, rubber lino carvings and beaded bracelets. He always has something nice to say, to the point where you get a little teary thinking about it, all his handsome coolness softened as he holds up an origami flower and says, Doll! Make one for me right now. And he sees the look on your face and asks you what's wrong, pulling the truth from you with a hand creeping down your arm.

Well, that's dull. This is the stuff that makes you you, and I really like you, so I like your flat.

Sirius would have a standing invitation from that point on. Sometimes you'll wake up after he does and find him drinking coffee with one of your half-finished friendship bracelets on his wrist :(((

[iravinirattu]

ik im late but im playing through kaveh's hangout event and. the haikaveh brainrot is real

since these losers can't do it themselves i am here to offer my translation services ‼️

al haitham you liar. we are in a library using our indoor voices you did NOT hear us.

and even if you did mr. "i hate small talk" why'd u walk over hmm?? hmm??

"dont mind if i ignore you, i've got my earphones in" <- applies to everyone except kaveh

"okay now that i've gotten him distracted tell me what's wrong so i can discreetly fix it"

mans literally sent kaveh away to boost his confidence a bit + find out if he was okay.

"you annoted those books with such long and beautiful notes that eveyone hated lolol anyways check out those shelfs where there's a book with someone appreciating ur notes"

i can't get over how many exceptions al haitham makes for kaveh. he's not heartless and cruel in the way i often see him portrayed... but at the same time his entire demeanor is "i respect you as a person but won't go out of my way to do things for you unless it benefits me"

like he's one of the only characters who isn't super super close with the traveler, at least that's how i see it in the voicelines! he respects them as a friend, would consider doing things for them if they asked, but that's about it really!

but KAVEH. for someone who enjoys a peaceful life and has such a rational and efficient way of working it theoretically makes no sense for him to do all the things he does for kaveh.

like sure "maybe the cheering up kaveh is just to avoid having to deal with him drunk later", but that's too roundabout of a demeanor to be al haitham's style. plus, if he really didn't want to deal with a drunk kaveh, he could just kick him out.

but he doesn't because he cares, and kaveh does not understand that because he has created a vision of what he thinks al haitham is in his head, and in that vision he, kaveh, has no value so why would haitham have him around?? clearly he's got ulterior motives.

and they won't move further until kaveh lets go of that vision, and he can only do that if he truly realises his own worth, and until then haitham's gonna have to keep pushing him towards that from the shadows.

"he overworks himself, it's not healthy. he forgets the practicality of his ideals when he starts something, thinking he can pull through it, but reality hits him halfway. he can keep his ideals, that's fine, but i wish he was a bit more realistic about them."

"and despite all of the above, despite wanting to uphold his artistic integrity, he still puts everyone's needs before his own."

"his approach is too contradictory, and hence people don't see his talent. there are those who's resolve is so brash they are seen as confident and unshakable; and yet he who is more talented than them all falls behind because he's so easy to take advantage of."

al haitham taught me two new words today lol

irascible - someone with a quick temper

paragon - something viewed as a standard

"if he wants things to change he needs to find a balance between compromise and resolve. there is no way to please everyone, but instead of accepting this, he thinks he can nullify it if he takes all the burden instead."

kaveh's altruism stems from his own self-hatred, moreso than his desire to help others. and while doing a good deed puts a smile on his face, the melancholy guilt that trips him when he doesn't is far greater.

"if they are his ideals then i have no right to say anything about them. but he hurts himself so much as a result of that and i wish he would love himself a bit more."

al haitham has a great deal of respect for kaveh, not just as a scholar but as a person. and it's hard watching someone like that dig their own grave, and there's nothing you can do but wait in the sidelines, because they won't believe anything you say.

al haitham is constantly bickering with kaveh to get him to feel a little, challenge his ideals, find a way to make them work without sacrificing himself in return.

"at this poing talking to him is no use, he's convinced himself that his life only has purpose if it's in the hands of others. all people face hardships in life, but he seems to believe he deserves all he gets and more"

and then after kaveh is back he gives him space to talk about things that make him happy, and more importantly, appreciate himself.

how to tell kaveh i want to listen to his silly lil rants without sounding like a sap - al haitham's brain, probably

al haitham knowing all of kaveh's little buttons, and pressing the right ones after determining his mood, so he can show kaveh he loves him but still sound like a bitch.

"you did so well. i am so proud, and i hope you are proud of yourself too."

and sometimes he does click the wrong one, but then immediately goes back on it, becomes soft(er than usual), offers reassurance, changes the topic, and so on

we saw this in the parade of providence event, when kaveh got legitimately upset at one of haitham's remarks and he immediately went into I HAVE UPSET MY BF recovery mode.

and what i love the most in all this is KAVEH'S DUMBASS IS SO OBLIVIOUS TO THIS LMAOOO

but also it's sad because the reason he's oblivious is because he doesn't think he's worth being cared for like that.

haikaveh's whole vibe is "i love you, but i'd much rather you love yourself first" and "i'm your one and only, your only exception, the one you'd break all your rules for" and i love it.

[styrmwb]

I beat Slayers X

losers........ scroll away. u cant HANDEL how cool this game is....

Hypnospace Outlaw is one of my favorite indie games of all time (Slay the Spire is also up there, these two are the peak for me). When I found out there was a sequel I was hyped. It only took my brain... a little under a year to actually play it XD (I gave Hypnospace another playthrough a few days ago cause I never got 100% or did the Plus content so that helped). But giving me more hypnospace universe (the trennisverse, as I've heard) goodness in the form of a game created, in character, by Zane? Fucking Outstanding. I've never really been a boomer shooter guy, so this was like... technically my first one played? I had a blast the whole way through, regardless.

gameplay......

Again, never actually played with my own two hands a boomer shooter before, but of course I've watched Doom gameplay, I've played more modern FPSs. I knew what I was getting myself into, and it felt super easy to maneuver. The weapons were all really fun, and I actually got to feel like each one had its own use, although the Glass Blasta and the Rapid Mutilator were my personal favorites, for power and mobility reasons alike. I loved the map design, which wasn't constant enemies and perpetual combat like I was expecting. There was a lot of downtime that let me explore, see the details put into everything, and to look for secrets. That was my favorite part of the gameplay for sure, although I'm sure for some people they might not like those slower parts and how hard some of the secrets were to find. I know I struggled a bit on some, but I still liked it. I played on the normal difficulty, which felt like it gave me enough of a challenge and enough time to breathe. It was the perfect mix.

atmosfear....

The theming of the game was FUCKING perfect. Hypnospace crushed it with the vibe of early internet forums, and Zane was spot on for a stupid edgy 15 year old of the time. They already mastered the execution, and they got to expand on it further here. The misspellings, the nu metal soundtrack, the graphics, the toilet humor and crude but just innocent enough dialogue, it all gets the vibe exactly correct. Hell, even in real life, with Zane being the irl creator of the game, his twitter, and the way that he advertises his game is perfect. If you don't know what you're getting into, you're gonna think this game is stupid, and I know this cause I've seen quite a few people just not understand what the bit is, and the bit is 50% of the enjoyment of the game. I love it, though. Can't wait for more of this energy in the future.

musik (awsome)

Growing up in the 2000s with younger parents, the general nu metal genre and anything in that era is what I listened to growing up, so this shit is NOSTALGIC for me. I love every song in the game, I love how dirty and rancid it sounds, they literally already got it perfect in Hypnospace, and Slayers X just gives me even more of what I already love. When you're not in combat and you're just walking around, the rock takes a backside for this creepy atmospheric noise which really makes the levels, showing the dingy nature and the (literal) shit. The bonus levels have different soundtracks that get that Doom level sound perfect, which I really appreciated as well.

characterz... (Zane, the coolest guy, and those other idiots.....)

I LOVE how this game's cast feels. The in universe explanations for everything really enhances it. Zane is still that same immature child he was years ago, the game is full of his ego, but you can see in his like, dev dialogue, that he has in fact aged and mellowed out, which is really sweet and saddening to see. The same kid who made bullying pages is now a single dad who clearly loves his kid even if he's not the sharpest tool in the shed, and is dealing with a lot of hardships in life. Like the original game, it's a surface of humor with a really deep inside. You get more of his character by seeing the rest of the cast. Mevin is creepy, obviously evil, definitely not inspired by anyone irl, and Zane's way of physically lashing out at his struggles. Steffanie literally sounds like there's 0 effort being put into her lines, and combined with the secret with Adam, the person that helped Zane code the game, showing annoyance yet still helping him shows that this dude is pathetic but... there's still something in him that makes people want to help him anyways. Mikey is also in on this, putting WAY more effort than anyone would ever need to in this game, but you can tell because of that that there's just something ABOUT Zane that people can't help but want to push him forward for some reason. Again, it's heartwarming and sad, and I love that.

the rest, ig uess...

I don't really know what else to say that I haven't already said; I love this game. It gives me more of what I loved out of Hypnospace, although hyperspecified to Zane (not complaining)

I DO HAVE TO ADMIT THOUGH, I HAVE A SERIOUS BIAS CAUSE ONE OF MY BEST FRIENDS HELPED MAKE IT AND I LOVE TO SEE HER WORK, SHE MADE SOME OF THE LEVELS AND SOME OF THE SOUNDTRACK AND SHE'S SUPER COOL AND AWESOME AND SKILLED SHOUTOUTS TO @headachelikeapillow YOU'RE THE BEST

I got a little easter egg in the game which is super cool :) It warms my heart to see my name lead into a fuckin saw chamber (that has literally stopped every streamer I've ever seen play that level in their tracks, it's hilarious)

sorry if I'm breaking an nda you can kill me if you need

Anyways, with that aside;

10/10. BADASS GAME MADE BY THE AWESOMEST DUDE AROUND.... HELL BE RICH AND FAMOUS FOR SURE AND GET ALL THE GIRLS (LIKE HE DOESNT ALREADY BWL)

[someh0eontheinternet]

Yelana x Obsessed fem.reader

(this is just a fanfic i wrote in two seconds and is purely a self insert because im OBSESSED with her but i hope u enjoy anyway haha 🌸🌸) (SEASON 4 SPOILERS) (no manga spoilers)

You became a scout because you needed the money. nothing more, nothing less. you weren't trying to chase after glory, or even protect the ones you loved.

all you wanted was to get your bag and go home.

luckily for you, your fighting skills were second to only the Ackerman's and you werent heartless enough to not put yourself in dangers way to save a comrade or two from the jaws of a titan. because of this, you were adored by the whole regiment due to the countless lives yourve saved in battle.

during the attack on Marley, and following your return to the flying blimp, you were greeted once again by your beloved comrades. you take a moment to silently count to yourself the number of soldiers around you and send a silent prayer to the ones who have fallen.

Interrupting your train of thought was a loud screech from the room over, that almost resembled a child. curious, you make your way over to the captain's den to find eren, levi, zeke, and two screaming children yelling about something you couldnt understand. Levi was the first to speak up...

"Y-n. I'm glad you're safe but this doesnt concern you. Please return to the other room."

You shrugged your shoulders and was about to turn to leave when a tall figure caught your eye.

"omg...omg....omg"

(sorry if this next part is cringe lol)

it was love at first sight. you lost control of your body as you speed walked over to her. she absolutely towered over you. she had to be 6'7 at least. you didnt even know women could get that tall ....

without thinking, you stand alarmingly close to her, taking her by surprise, and start speaking without thinking.

"oh my god....you are the most beautiful woman i have ever seen. everything about you is just so....handsome. your blond hair. your gorgeous grey eyes. even the way you're looking down at me. who on earth even are you!???" you look up at her with a sparkle in your eye that almost made the tall blond lose her composure, but she recovered.

She had never been complimented like this before. her whole life she had been told that she was a misfit and she was too 'masculine' to fit in. god....you really caught her off guard.

she tried to hide it however, her pride was too important.

"I....who i am is none of your business, soldier. i would advise you return to...."

she was cut off however by you moving your body closer you hers, your breasts pushing up against her chest, causing her cheeks to become a deep red.

"oh please pretty lady, no reason to be so harsh with pretty old me. i just wanted to tell you how beautiful you were".

"Well i um...*cough*" the tall woman looked away embarrassed.

hange entered the room and spoke up.

"come on yelena, you should give her more of a chance. this is y-n. one of our strongest and bravest soldiers. plus, she's cute as a button. practically all the boys in the servey corps have developed a crush on her one time or the other" hange chuckled as they entered the room.

"....hey, i havent" eren pouted in the corner, too embarrassed to be taken seriously.

"haha fucking loser" zeke said, mocking his little brother eren.

"hey! shut your trap Zeke" eren growled.

"hey back me up levi. tell yelena how good of a soldier y-n is" hange whined

"well...ive never seen anyone kick ass quite like her. even mikasa hesitated on the field, but y-n just shoved her blades right up their smelly asses"

"she did what..." yelena interrupted.

"pretty pleaseeeeee yelena darling. ive never liked any of these nobodies (eren: hey!) but you're special. please if you take my hand in yours i swear to love you until my last breath".

yelena looked away and pouted before swinging you up over her shoulder and walking out the room with you.

"we will be back later. and dont u dare disturb us."

*blush* *blush*

💕🌺💕🌺💕🌺💕🌺💕🌺

authors note:

im so sorry xDDDDD

[starscelly]

I'm over here begging you. For the love of all that is holy, please talk to me about Tyler Seguin and the new dude, Mason Marchment !

anon i would LOVE to discuss tyler and mush !!!!! im very sorry this will probably be super long winded and incoherent. but u shouldve known what u signed up for with me tbh

FIRST i wanna say if ur looking for like. in depth analysis or many Moments of theirs i would very much recommend taking time to scroll through teex’s 2791 tag it is a joy and pretty thoroughly covers all of the stupidity from this season and i feel like they r like pioneering the 2791/smush insanity. that being said. allow me to talk my shit for a moment dkfsdjkfs.

i just think its Fascinating that in the past few years tyler has for sure like, turned down his usual vibe of constantly hamming it up for the camera and getting super flirty with all these guys etc etc. it is, i think, far less present these past few yrs than before. until mush got to this team lol. i feel like he’s really been brought back out of his shell (definitely also helped by the new coaching staff, his recovery from injuries, finding a new role on the team, their success etc, but) and we’re starting to see this silly tyler that we know and love again!!! the first thing i can really remember of them being particularly fun flirty and cringe together is the sandwich video (this is prolly wrong, but off the top of my head), but their chemistry has definitely been there all season. like even before we were exposed to this type of behavior, they’ve been on a line together All Season, even when they could not get a good third guy to fit on their line, deboer clearly knew there was something working between them. which like, we all saw the first few games of the season. obviously he’s correct lol. 

so they have good chemistry on the ice which is a super plus, and we’ve seen time and time again how close they are as people - mush being insane concerned about tyler’s injury, constantly saying they miss the other when they’re injured, the sandwich video, tyler “interviewing” mush with his drink, etc - and they just have a lot of casual affection for one another. but i have to say. my favorite thing is how stupid i feel for not realizing that they’d be an obvious pairing the second mush got traded here lmao. if you look at a long line of Tyler History he fits PERFECTLY. a feisty, huge, dark-haired left winger???? that is his MO, at this point (all 4 traits have applied to his like Closest or most notorious connections, but if u wanna take out “huge” we got marchy on the b’s, if u wanna talk ancient history we have tyler brown back when he was young young idk how feisty he was, but either way these are like. quintessential traits he loves). (this is a bit tyler heavy, on account of i just know more about him in general than mush, so sorry about that lol) but he very much just wants someone he can make fun of / laugh at, someone who would probably kill an opponent for him , and someone who is a huge cringe loser who will do anything to make him laugh. and mason for suuuuure checks off all those boxes and more. and if that is what we needed to bring back the silly, god bless mush, because he succeeded and Also made me adore HIM at the same time. despite all his mess and penalty minutes fjldsfklds

this is like. super long winded i am so sorry. but if there’s anything specific u wanna talk abt with these two cringefail losers Please feel free to message me or send another ask or whatever. i can’t even begin to unpack how deranged i feel abt them sometimes !!!

[ckygetsjobs]

This ain’t even jealously 

A/n: Ryan helps you sabotage Dicos relationship with his new s/o after you break up with him. Based off the song want u back by Cher Lloyd. This is a trip fr.

you were angrily downing a soda giving Dico and his new significant other the most dirty look you could muster, rolling your fucking eyes and huffing. You were at your favorite restaurant, but the thing was it was his favorite restaurant too. Of course he’d be there, you liked a lot of the same things, where before it brought you together in a good way, now it just left a sour taste in your mouth. 

As you were hating on them someone sat down next to you, already sighing, like they knew what you thinking about. “You’re hating on them aren’t you? You know you’re the one who broke up with him right?”

You turned your head to see your best friend, the most annoying fucker, Dunn. His blonde hair a mess and his very light stubble beard, wearing a baby blue shirt and just having a look on his face that said he was already done with you. You still loved him regardless, even if he was a loser. “Yeah… I just didn’t think he’d move on so fast.” 

Ry Ry, with a beer in his hands, and a plate of fries gave you a straight stare “You’ve met Dico right? He can’t keep his dick in his pants for nothing I’m not surprised.”

You laughed loudly, Dunn always had that affect on you, could make you laugh or smile in instant. This is one of those times, but when was it not. “I guess you’re right, but I want you to help me sabotage their relationship…. because I want him back.”

Ryan drank a lot of his beer before answering you, “you can’t be fucking serious… tell me you’re joking…. Did you not hear what I told you. Plus you just broke up with him.”

He knew you weren’t joking of course, he just really hoped you were. “I need this Dunn, come on.” 

Ry Ry agreed, but angrily and annoyed, obviously telling you it was a bad idea but it went in one ear and out the other. You and Ryan left the restaurant, you with an extra kick in your step and Dunn just walking slower, not hyped one bit. 

As you guys formed the plans in the next coming days, which was really just you pitching ideas and Ryan telling you if it was stupid or not. He agreed with some but only because he had to pick one. This time you were at the bowling alley, knowing this is a place he likes to go. You seen him sitting down in a seat by the bowling balls, his arm around his new significant other. He had a practically shining bowling outfit that you had saw before, that just fit him so well, and a bowling ball that matched it. 

You weren’t jealous, and you’d deny it if Dunn asked. He never did though, he just went along with your stupid idea. When you did do it, it didn’t even work. Dico wasn’t even bothered and it pissed you off.  You and Ryan still ended up bowling, you were there anyways, but you were both horrible at it, so it was just a bunch of laughter and beers. 

When you went home that night, your weren’t even that upset. Yeah you were mad because Dico is an asshole, but Dunn made it a fun night and it made you happy. You were hoping the next time was going to work, maybe you could try to revise it in the next coming days. 

It didn’t go well, it never went well, but the further along it went the less you cared, you weren’t even angry at their relationship anymore, you were just tired of seeing them around. You and Ryan always had a blast though, no matter if it was the stupid bowling or peeking behind bushes pushing each other jokingly. That is until one day he kissed you… and you didn’t know how to feel…. So you ghosted him. It made you feel horrible, because you kissed back in the first place when he did kiss you but you were just so confused. You thought you liked Dico… clearly… but it didn’t seem to matter, the pit in your stomach and the ache in your heart wasn’t from missing Dico, it was from missing Dunn.

You knew you had to fix it, so you hurriedly ran out of your house, drove in your car at an alarming speed, reaching Ryan’s house in incredible time, knocking on his door too much than normal. Until he answered it, raising an eyebrow as he was shirtless and wearing jeans. You just walked up and kissed him, not even saying anything, he wrapped his arms around you like a side hug, kissing you just as rushed as you did. “I see you came to your senses, weirdo,” he smiled and pulled you inside his house. You didn’t even think about Dico for the rest of the night, too preoccupied with something else… you only thought about him again when Dunn made a hilarious joke about him the next day when the two of you seen him at Kmart.

[3dumb2potatoes1]

•High • School • Crush•

Pt.3 I hope this stops

•Pairing: Hyunjin x Female reader.•

•Genre: Classmates to friends.•

•Warnings: Crying, Swearing, Shouting, Bullying.•

•Word count: 1,320

•Note: Like last time, please tell me if I missed anything.•

☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆

What the hell was this? There were rumours?! And not only that… IT WAS YOUR BESTIE WHO STARTED IT. You knew there was something up with her that day. You couldn't stop yourself from crying even harder. Your pillow was even more soaked now, and it was even harder now to fall asleep. Even worse was, that the rumour was about you and HYUNJIN dating. Your biggest crush. Why couldn't it have been someone else, instead of Hyunjin?

You finally fell asleep after about an hour of what felt like hell. Rumours were everywhere and you were getting so much hate, while the rumours were still spreading. More and more people heard about the rumour. “How could someone like her be with Hyunjin.” “Ew, it's the kid with no friends.” “OMG HER WITH HIM?! WTH” “No way Hyunjin chose her among every other girl in the school.” And there were many more comments about it, than just them.

You skipped a few days of school, cause you weren’t emotionally prepared for it. You planned on going back on Thursday just to see Hyunjin and see what he thought of the rumours. Texting him wouldn’t be the same as talking to him directly. Plus, seeing his beautiful face would make things just a bit better. All the days when you were at home, you hadn’t seen your family. Everyone distanced themselves from you, just like you did to them. The only times where you saw them were when you went to get food from the counter and take it to your room, when you had to use the bathroom, and when you needed something to drink, which you didn’t really have to get out a lot for, cause you had your water bottle on your bedside table which u could refill when you went to the bathroom. And going to the bathroom without seeing them wasn’t a huge problem, cause the bathroom was right across your room in the hallway.

The next day of school had come. You were so scared to go into the kitchen for breakfast and see your family. This had affected you more than it should have. When you entered the kitchen, all eyes were on you. Your moms, dads and little brother's eyes were on you only. Mom looked away while giving you a very disappointed look. “There, eat,” she said while trying to minimize the number of words she used. You couldn't really blame her. You understood why she was mad at you for “dating” someone and breaking her rules. But you still loved your mom, so you tried to keep it cool. Your brother was teasing you by making kissy lips to pretend like he was you and your “boyfriend.” Your dad wasn't really bothered, though he had never really been bothered about this type of stuff.

When you arrived at school, it was all like a nightmare. Everyone was in the halls whispering. All you could hear was you and Hyunjin. Many people were staring at you, making you walk faster towards your class with small tears in your eyes. Your eyes were glossy and there were small sniffs coming from you. It was so noticeable that people started laughing while saying hateful comments. “Get the loser to keep crying haha!!” “Oh look at the crybaby! She’s doing it again, crying!” “Why is she crying? She should be grateful she is finally getting attention,” Does she not want attention after deciding to date Hyunjin?” “Should’ve known what she got herself into.” Crybaby wasn’t as hurtful, cause you had been called that many times before by the bullies.

You finally made it to class. But even the class was weird. People had written and doodled all over your desk with another load of hate. Could this day get worse? Oh yeah, it could… Hyunjin was sitting at his desk with the same thing on his desk, and laying with his head on it like he was tired. Instead of girls everywhere around him trying to get his attention. People were in small groups in the corners away from him. Most boys stood around him and laughed at him with a few of the girls. As soon as they saw you walk in, the first thing you heard from one of the girls was, “Oh Hyunjin look! It’s your girlfriend!! Go give her a little kiss. HAHAHAHA!!!” While nudging Hyunjin. Hyunjin looked like he had just been crying too, just like you. You walked over to your desk like nothing had happened but still with a sad look. Hyunjin looked up at you with no emotion in his eyes. Not gonna lie it was a little hot, but right now felt like the wrong time to think that.

When the teacher entered the class, it was all chaos. The first thing the teacher did when he entered, was say “Hyunjin, Y/n. I would like to talk to you after the class.” Was it ok to feel this nervous when you knew exactly what it was about and you hadn’t done it? The teacher told everyone to get to their seats. While sitting down for a bit a girl starts throwing paper at you and Hyunjin. Both of you notice her but say nothing about it. At the third throw, you pick up the paper and attempt to throw them into the trash bin. You made sure to throw when the teacher wasn’t looking. But when you threw it, the teacher turned back to face everyone and saw you throwing it, thinking you were trying to hit someone. “Detention,” he shouted with no hesitation. “Wait, what?” You said so confused. “Don’t throw paper at other classmates. I saw what you tried to do.” He shouted while staring deep into your eyes till you moved. “She didn’t throw it! I did…” What? Hyunjin was trying to get you out of it, by saying it was him, and even throwing one of the pieces of paper at the girl. But it didn’t work. Instead, he gave both of you detention. “Nice try Hyunjin. But I’m gonna give you both detention now.”

No one except you and Hyunjin was in detention. While doing the things the principal made you do, “I’m sorry about what has happened,” suddenly came from Hyunjin. You didn’t know what to say until you started tearing up once again. Hyunjin noticed immediately and stopped what he was doing to help you. “Oh no! Why are you crying? Did I say something?” “No no no you didn’t it’s just these days have been so shitty because of the rumours.” You said while crying. “I’m so sorry.” Why was he apologising when none of this was his fault. Suddenly you felt like someone was hugging you. It was Hyunjin! You had always dreamt of at least hugging him, and now it was happening!! You just wanted to tell him why it was affecting you so much. That you had been in love with him for a long time and that’s why the rumours started. Clearly, you couldn’t say that cause you had pretty much just started hanging out. “fuck all this bullshit. You looked like you needed a hug.” That was so cute of him to say, and he was right too, you actually did need a hug from all this shit. “Is all this really this bad or is it just me?” You asked. “Being bullied, being laughed at, getting hateful comments and even having almost the whole school against us including the teachers? Yeah, it’s pretty bad I think.” He was right. “I just can’t help but cry almost every day.” Why did you say that, he would probably ask why. “I’m happy you finally came to school again, this happened the other days too just not as bad as this.” No way he just said that. “Are you serious?! Shiiiit…

I hope this ends.

The end

To be continued

Made by Potato 2

[f1nalboys]

dream date w/ all ur favorite guys plus also mr. dilf bomont sinclair

do NOT say april 25

typed everything out for this and it deleted oh tumblr mobile i hate u. anyways i deleted april 25 but i am a WHORE i kept it to just the slasher horror losers <3333

Randy Meeks: MOVIE DATE MOVIE DAYE MOVIE DATE. drive in theater playing a campy experimental movie that randy mansplains to me in great detail despite the fact i’ve seen it before and i just sigh dreamily and listen w his cock in my mouth and we giggle over the silly stuff and he is super shy and nervous and calls me pretty 🤭

Bo Sinclair: see i am so annoying and i’m gonna say a picnic in a flower field like my one self insert fic of him i posted 😭 the thought of something so sweet and wholesome w THIS GUY makes me giggle, especially the little bits i’ve added like making him a flower crown and him smiling for the photo i take of him and ans and. sorry

Lester Sinclair: i want lester to show me his boner and then bone collection. sorry.? my bad….anyways I FR WOULD LOVE THAT THO him showing me the bones and the taxidermy he’s done and just geeking out and it’s after he cooked for us and he’s all spiffed up and is so nervous….. oh i’m sick sorry i love him

Mickey Altieri: gotta go to the bar w this loser i mean that!!!! just like a hole in the wall place that has a theme (let’s get real, he’s one of those guys who does that and is like No. We’re sticking to the Theme or else. and i agree w him) OR one of those silly interactive theater experiences idk i think something where he can act would be fun bc he’s an attention whore slut

Chad Meeks-Martin: some reason i see him killing a traditional “movie then dinner” date and then he’d take me for a drive (i’m like a dog i love car rides) and he’d blast my music and make fun of it and then hold my hand on the drive home and kiss me goodnight as if i wouldn’t pull him into my place to fuck

David (TLB): nothing i just wanna fuck (but him winning me a prize at the fair and then taking me on the ferris wheel before that would also be nice idk)

[alister312]

1, 2, 22, 23!!

THANK U FOR THE ASK ELLA!! sorry it took me a hot sec to answer 😅 in reference to this ask list

1. First ship you remember

I’ve said it before but Bunny is the very first SP ship I remember shipping and what got me into the fandom in the first place! Second after that I think was Style… they’ve always been ships that go hand in hand anyway so it makes sense. Anyway Bunny was my OTP back in the day, definitely the ship I read and wrote the most fic for (before discovering Gregstophe).

2. Your newest ship

I feel like everyday there’s new rarepairs I’m crafting in my head like “Would that even work?” BUT my most recent one I think I’ve stuck on is Gary/Heidi (Gardi?). It started from me doing the South Park ship meme for my 400 followers, when I drew them next to each other and thought “Aw they’re kinda cute!” Since then, I’ve been thinking more about them (especially with my next gen concept) and I think I really like them together? I picture them being super normal, much more so than any other SP couple, but very sweet and supportive. I’ll admit that part of why I like that comes from the fact that I don’t have any major Gary or Heidi ships I like (except Stary, but I’m shipping Style like 90% of the time so not really). It’s a little “pair the spares” in that sense, but I’ve never seen anything wrong with that concept.

22. Ship that you immediately fell in love with after one scene despite not considering it before

Not a scene BUT I really started to like Kengory (Kenny/Gregory) as a ship after rereading Lex Talionis recently. They’re not a pair in that fic but they have SUCH a good dynamic in it, I couldn’t not fall in love. Like, it’s a pairing you’d never consider because they don’t interact in the slightest in the movie (nor is there any implication that they ever did) but if you really start to think about it, it makes a ton of sense. Both care very deeply about protecting those around them and standing up for what’s right. They’re also both a bit of a martyr, Kenny as Mysterion especially. There’s also the potential for them to have a sort of prince and the pauper thing going on (I know the prince doesn’t date the pauper in the OG story but oh well).

23. Poly ship that you ship despite not shipping some of the characters in it outside of poly ship

This isn’t quite what the question asked but I’ve got a number of weird poly ships involving Kevin Stoley?? For example, last year I was kinda into the idea of him plus Tokendy, then him plus Clybe, and now I’ve kinda got him in a larger polycule for my next gen (Kenbe are married but Kenny is also dating Butters and Bebe is also dating Kevin). I’ve never been huge into any individual Kevin ships, mostly because the only big ones out there are Revin (and I headcanon Red as a lesbian) and Stolovan (which I do like but not nearly as much as other Clyde ships). Kevin is just my beloved little nerd loser and I love tacking him onto ships that make no sense <3

Mumu and I have also done fun thought experiments where we take characters, stick them in a randomizer, and make random polycules from that. It’s all very silly usually, but sometimes there’s some really interesting ideas and circumstances we can think of that would lead to such a ship!

[claireunoia]

u look smelly but cute

guys i don’t look smelly, the only thing i smell like is tom’s tomussy. not stanky !

— if you haven’t seen me before try and guess what you’ll think i would look like

[angelplummie]

Okay so like for starterssssss, I love getting represented as a chubby gal 🥺🥺 so I love you for writing that last Oikawa imagineeeee 😩😩😩

Soooo, I was wondering if I could request a plus size reader that really likes Kuroo, (and he’s like a super cliché bad boy🤰🏽) but he’s too embarrassed to be seen with Y/n. So she starts to hit on his friend or try to make him jealous. (I want you to add your own little idea here! But likeee, make her a baddie 😘😘)

Thanks baby 😚

HE’S A SCUMBAG DON’T YOU KNOW

KUROO X CHUBBY F!READER

Angsty?? kinda, a pinch of suggestive stuff

masterlist

post girlboss was referring to

a/n:i decided to go for emo / anger issues / definitely has punched a hole in his wall kuroo, just cuz i love writing losers, and i love seeing grown men cry. reader is like 20/21 just like college age yk, kuroo is 23 as stated in fic. p.s where my artic monkey hoes at

warnings: swearing, mentions of sex n specific sexual acts, suggestive stuff, uhhh bad boy but he’s not a (bad boy) he’s just a (bad) (boy) he’s just no good, like no fr never date guys like this, he may SEEM COOL and give you the dick but girl you will be so embarrassed once u realised u gave up the kitty for a man that genuinely believes tame impala and mac demarco are unheard of and calls himself an empath even though he’s mean to his mum every time she comes over to help with the laundry and has manipulated every girl he’s ever been in the vicinity of but i digress! on with the story!

“Kuroo-!” you yelped in surprised, bed bouncing beneath you. The second he had thrown you down, he ripped off his shirt and made a noise of frustration when he couldn’t shed his skinny jeans fast enough. Brows furrowed, he began hopping furiously to yank them off.

You laughed, much to his annoyance.

“You’re gonna hurt yourself if you keep up with that. What’s the rush?”

He sighed, and carefully pulled them off his ankles. Standing up straight, he seemed to have composed himself, with that cocky smirk on his rugged face. Your eyes trailed down his lean, long body. It was all you could do not to scream, he was so gorgeous. He took a few sweeping steps to where you lay, and got right on top of you, hands either side of your head. His eyes bore into you, it made you squirm internally, not that you would ever admit it.

“Just want you so bad, kitten.”

You barked out a laugh as if your heart didn’t jolt at his stupid pet name. It was such a stupid name, but coming from him it made you melt. Again, not like you’d ever admit it.

“Ew, Tetsu don’t call me kitten, it’s cr-“

He cut you off by leaning down and kissing you, you could feel his snake bites against your bottom lip. He groaned softly, shoving his tongue down your throat. He tasted like his sour apple vape, and his hair was soft when you ran your fingers through it. You could barely contain your butterflies, eyes squeezed closed.

“Come on babe, you know you like it.”

No matter how many times you and Kuroo hung out, it always felt so fresh. Maybe it was because he was exciting, or because he was a little bit wild, you didn’t know.

He leaned down closer to you, getting on his elbows, deepening the kiss. He pulled away and smirked at your breathlessness. With a slender, ring adorned hand, he reached beneath your top and cupped your tits over your bra. He gave them a sharp squeeze and started placing chaste kisses on your neck. He was considerate like that, didn’t leave hickeys because he knew they’d be hard to cover for you. He groaned as he jiggled the fat of your boobs in his hands,

“God, you have the nicest tits, babe.”

You had been dating for nearly 3 months now, if that was what it was. To be honest, you weren’t really sure what you were. You hang out all the time at his or your place, there was rarely a time when you didn’t have an ache between your legs, one way or another. He didn’t really take you on ‘dates’ but chatting to him was fun in itself, you didn’t need to go out to do that. He didn’t necessarily say romantic stuff either... but he didn’t not say romantic stuff either? He beat up your ex at a party one time! That had to mean something right? He exactly wouldn’t tell you how he felt but he showed you, kissing your cheek or tilting your chin up to look at him or kissing your neck or feeling you up. But that usually led to sex, so you couldn’t be certain. It wasn’t like you only screwed though, you watched your favourite movies together... although the last couple times he just started fingering you. You showed him your playlists? No no, he showed you his playlists, his sex playlists. There seemed to be a common theme here. But... there were times, afterwards, when he would pull in you so tight, tell you how good you were for him, how well you did, how pretty you looked. Any doubts you had were gone after a few hushed words on his tobacco reeking rickety old bed. You’d never really had a relationship like this before, but you assumed it was just because Kuroo was so chill. You were probably boyfriend and girlfriend, he just didn’t feel the need to announce it, he was laidback like that. So what if you guys had a lot of sex? Weren’t you a new couple? Wasn’t this just the honeymoon stage were you can’t get your hands off each other? You didn’t want to seem high maintenance and nag, so you let it be. He was sweet enough to you, right now everything was good.

Until it wasn’t.

A clatter sounded downstairs, the door slamming open against the hallway wall.

“Kuroo! Hey man, I brought some California!”, a voice called from bellow.

Kuroo broke away immediately, spit trailing from your neck to his pink lips.

“Shit, shit, shit, shit,” Kuroo mumbled, pushing off the bed and scrambling the pick up his discarded clothes and shove them back on.

You sat up, disgruntled, rearranging your bra strap from were he’d kneaded at it.

“What’s wrong? Who is that?”

He shot you a glance before continuing to yank back on his jeans.

“Uh, so change of plan, I can’t do tonight. I need you to go home. Discreetly.”

What?

“What? Tetsu, I’m already here,” you scoffed.

What was going on?

Why was he acting like this?

You had never seen him so... frantic.

“I know babe, and I’m really sorry about that, but my friends are here early than I said.”

“So? Can’t I meet your friends?”

He didn’t reply for a moment, just let out an exasperated breath, zipping up his fly.

“Well, yeah you can meet them, just not with me. I don’t want them knowing that I-“

He cut himself off, but you had heard enough to understand.

There was a beat of silence, only disturbed by Kuroo’s friends calling for him.

Your mouth hung open, and you scoffed in shock.

You shouldn’t be surprised really. It’s so obvious now that you think about it. So that’s what this was. That explains everything. He didn’t really like you, he was just using you. That’s why he didn’t take you anywhere, or why he didn’t show you he cared. It was because he didn’t. He wasn’t “afraid of getting close to people” or “emotionally distant”, he was just upfront about not giving two shits about you aside from your vagina. I guess he didn’t want his friends to know he was furiously screwing a fat girl any chance he got. He was embarrassed of you. You were something to be ashamed of. Your stomach jerked as you got to your feet. You were pissed, but that didn’t mean it didn’t really hurt. You had liked him. A lot.

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

You could see the panic in his eyes, it was quite funny actually. Of course you new what it meant, but it still made you feel a little better to watch his eyes widen like that, to hold a shred of power over him.

“I mean- well I didn’t- come on babe you know I didn’t mean it like that-“ he laughed nervously, not noticing the footsteps in the landing. You rolled your eyes. You may have been naive, but you certainly weren’t going to fall for his shit again. Whatever he spouted.

“Don’t give me that bullshit. Just say it, your embarrassed of me.”

“Y/N, please, don’t you think-“

Two men burst through the door, one with spiked grey hair and one with fluffy black hair.

“Kuroo! What the hell are you doing up here we’ve been-“ the grey haired one, stopped when his eyes went from a shirtless Kuroo to you.

Your eyes flickered to Kuroo, he looked mortified.

“Ah. I see. Well, Akaashi, we better give these two some time, we can just-“

“Oh no, I was just leaving,” you grabbed your jacket from on top of his chest of drawers and turned back to the two men, putting on a big smile, adrenaline and fury spurring you on.

“I’m Y/N, by the way.”

Your eyes shot to Kuroo, who looking like get was about to shit himself.

“You probably haven’t heard of me, me and Kuroo have actually been having sex for three months. He kept it a secret because he’s embarrassed of me. We should hang out soon though!”

“Y/N-!” Kuroo yelled, exasperation clear in his tone, but you were already descending the stairs.

He came into the hall, hands rubbing his temples.

“Y/N just come talk for a second, I can-“

But he was cut off by the door slamming.

You got in your car parked outside and sped away.

The whir of the engine and the monotony of the roads cleared your mind a bit, a mist of anger still remaining.

You can’t believe you let yourself be tricked. you were a fully grown woman, but you had been reeled in hook, line and sinker. Not only had you been reeled in, you have been reeled in by a man that still had tik tok LED lights in his room and a fucking monster can collection at the age of 24 fucking years old. The more you thought about him, the more you realised how much of an emo loser he was. Of course you were still hurting, but it was more of the angry hurt you feel when it turns out your crush is homophobic or something (been there done that, don’t ask). He was a waste of oxygen, you had decided by the time you made it back to your apartment. A waste of perfectly good space that could most definitely not get the kitty anymore. You got inside your house, pulled on some comfies and got on facetime with your friends.You told them all about what happened, and they passionately bitched about him with you, confirming your suspicion that they never liked him in the first place. They also told you to forget about his existence, he wasn’t worth a slither of your brain power, he was dirt compared to you. All in all, you felt marginally better, saying goodbye to your friends while they still giggled about how stupid Kuroo’s hair was.

This was just a speed bump, you thought as you tucked yourself into bed, you would get over this.

Fast.

“Who’s Bokuto been talking to all night?” Yamamoto leaned over to ask Lev, shouting over the blaring music.

It was a week after you had thrown Kuroo to the curb, and he was out with a couple of volleyball friends, some from Nekoma, but there was also Bokuto with them.

“I’m not sure. I think it’s Y/N something? She’s in class. She’s pretty chill.”

Kuroo’s ears perked up, and he turned around to face his friends up against the bar.

“Bokuto’s talking to who?” he said through gritted teeth.

“Y/N. She goes to my-“

“I know who Y/N is,” kuroo snapped, taking a swig of the beer in his hand and scanning the dance floor for either one of you. He found bokuto first, shoulder against the wall, holding a drink as he leant down to have you whisper something in his ear. That’s when Kuroo paid attention to you. You looked... you looked gorgeous. He felt jealousy creep up inside him. How many times had you been out looking like that since you broke things off? How many guys had you slept with since? How dare Bokuto chat you up when he knew you two had been a thing? Wasn’t he meant to be Kuroo’s friend? As Kuroo wound himself up, you and bokuto continued your extremely pleasant conversation.

“I just wanna say, sorry about Kuroo. He’s a real bonehead, but we’ve been friends since high school so I can’t ditch him.”

You snorted into your cocktail.

“What?”

“Bonehead?”

He frowned and straightened up indignantly.

“Yeah, and? What’s wrong with bonehead?”

“No no, nothing, it’s just very Legally Blonde.”

He beamed down at you.

“I love Legally Blonde!”

“You do? Me too!”

This big beefy man was very cute, you had been talking for nearly three hours now, but you never ran out of things to say. And, aside from the obligatory introduction compliments, he had not made any move to try and get you into a wendy’s bathroom as quick as possible, which you couldn’t say of yours and kuroo’s first meeting.

He had dreamy eyes, you noted as he smiled for the nth time that night.

“Whose your favourite-?”

“What the fuck are you doing man?”

You glanced scathingly over to the familiar face of your old fling.

“What?” Bokuto asked back, clearly done with his friends bad boy shtick.

“Why are you talking to her when... when you know?”

“What’s there to know? I’m talking to her because I want to, and she wants to.”

He looked over to you for approval.

“Right?”

You nodded, a little nervous. You hated Kuroo’s guts, but you knew how weirdly possessive he was, you didn’t wanna cause trouble for Bokuto.

“See? Now I don’t think she wants to see you, right?”

He looked at you again. You nodded again.

“Ok? You guys are over, now are we done?”

Kuroo huffed. His eyes flitted from Bokuto to you, remembering you were there most likely, and he scowled.

“No, we aren’t done, what are you trying to pull anyway? Trying to piss me off by talking to someone I know? Are you really that petty? Well, your little plan is working, so just-just stop, ok?”

You felt like screaming. You had just come out here to have a nice time, not listen to Kuroo’s narcissistic whining.

“Can you just fuck off? Was I not clear enough or something? You’re dead to me, Kuroo. I’m just trying to have a nice night.”

Kuroo’s mouth gaped open. He had never been spoken to like that, never. He clenched his fists at his sides and his glare intensified.

“You’re lucky I gave you the time of day, fat ugly slut.”

He grabbed Bokuto’s shoulder roughly, turning him to face him completely.

“Hey man, thanks for clearing up my sloppy seconds, really good of you. Good to know I’ve got great friends like you.”

Those were the last things out of Kuroo’s mouth before bokuto landed a punch on his cheek, knocking him to the ground.

“You’re a fucking asshole man,” Bokuto grunted.

He stepped over where Kuroo lay, and held out a hand for you to step over too. You took it quietly and trailed along behind him to the door, fingers still locked. His hands were warm, and big. Kuroo’s face must hurt right now. The thought made you smile. He held the door open for you before sighing, resting his back against the wall. You stood in front of him, twiddling with your fingers.

“I am so sorry about that,” You apologised, embarrassed and shaken by the scene Kuroo had made, “I shouldn’t have wound him up, and I shouldn’t have talked to you after I knew you guys were friends, I promise I didn’t mean to start anything.”

“Don’t be, if anything I’m sorry for not making him leave right away. And either way,” he gently reached for your hand again, and you let him take it,”I’m glad you talked to me. I’d like it if you talked to me even more.”

DISCLAIMER FOR KUROO STANS!!!! I DONT THINK HIS HAIR IS STUPID!!! it’s just when ur bestie is going thru a break up or anything entailing a male you shit talk everything about him to high hell, doesn’t matter if he’s the most beautiful man you’ve ever seen. also i have no ill will towards kuroo nor any of the characters i write shit bag fan fics about i just like to complain any way i hope you enjoyed! reblogs and replies always appreciated!!!

[grapesodatozier]

so close to the real thing (closer than you think)

rating: explicit

word count: 6.8k

summary: Eddie's been pining over Richie for as long as he can remember. He loves everything about Richie; especially how much Richie loves touching him. It's a little inconvenient, though. Eddie copes with his pent up sexual tension by constantly checking a porn blog he's obsessed with on tumblr. This guy has the same type of body as Richie, he talks like Richie, his name is even Richie! It makes it all too easy for Eddie to pretend it really is Richie while getting himself off to all of the blog's content.

You'll never guess what he finds out when he starts sexting this stranger named Richie from his anonymous porn blog.

tags: friends to lovers, porn with feelings, love confessions, dom/sub dynamics, bi dom top richie, gay sub bottom eddie, the most oblivious pining idiots in the world lol we love them

notes: this is one of my more ridiculous ideas but I had so much fun with it lol. also as a note you probably should not approach people on the internet the way they do in this fic, but they're just v enthusiastic and everything here is v consensual!! still tho definitely don't take this indulgent fic as a guide on how to approach real people online lmao. okay have fun!!

read on ao3 or below!!

notsfw under the cut

Eddie Kaspbrak’s friends were his entire world; time spent with them meant everything to him. But he also really valued his alone time. He’d always been the sort who needed time to just sit on a grassy hill and watch the trains go by, to catch up on comics in his room, to get lost in Netflix shows or even just his thoughts as he moseyed around his apartment—one he live in by himself, for when these moods hit. He needed time to himself to unwind. And sometimes he unwound by scrolling through some porn blogs on tumblr with his hand in his pants.

There was one blog that he was particularly fond of. There were other blogs more catered to his personal interests, namely blogs that didn’t feature women like this one did. But there was a good balance of genders represented, so Eddie figured he could just scroll past those posts. This guy was worth it. His pictures were ridiculously hot, and his dirty talk was even hotter.

Also, his name was Richie. Which Eddie refused to acknowledge as part of the draw.

It was harder to ignore tonight. He’d been out with the losers, and Richie had just been so touchy. And there was something about the way he'd been talking; his voice was lower than normal, slower in a way that made Eddie’s stomach flip. And his touches had lingered, his hand squeezing Eddie’s hip slow, then lazily brushing against his ass as he dropped it. Eddie could hardly take it. He brushed it off as Richie just being tired from work, but god, Eddie wanted it to mean more. The hardest part was hiding how much he wanted Richie to keep doing it.

There were so many things Eddie wanted Richie to do to him. He wanted Richie to touch him harder, to grab him by his hips with both hands. Richie’s hands were so big; Eddie just knew Richie could manhandle him so easily, so roughly. He wanted to know what it would feel like to have Richie’s hands all over him, grabbing at his ass and his thighs, holding his wrists down, making him feel so small. While Eddie would never admit it, huffing at every short joke Richie made, but he loved being shorter than Richie. He loved how safe he felt when Richie held him. And he was dying to know how small he would feel with Richie looming above him, or sitting in Richie’s lap, bouncing on his cock. He wanted to hear Richie talking to him in that low, slow voice, with that condescension Eddie did his best to pretend not to be affected by. He wanted Richie to whisper in his ear and call him all those pretty names he always dropped so casually, all those sweet ones and also ones that were a lot meaner. He wanted Richie to want him.

But it was easier to think about it than to ask for it. He knew Richie had way more experience than him. Well, okay, maybe not way more necessarily, but they were starting their third year of college, and he hadn’t wasted any time. Eddie, on the other hand, hadn’t done anything more than hand stuff with someone else. The guys he’d hooked up with were nice enough, and hot enough, but they just… weren’t Richie.

He supposed this guy on tumblr wasn’t Richie either, but at least he was everything else Eddie wanted. None of his hookups had been so, well, dominant, and that was this guy’s whole thing. He was dominant and a top and into guys that looked like Eddie. He even kind of talked like Richie, and he was apparently pining over his best friend, just like Eddie was. It had him completely smitten. Plus, internet-Richie’s crush had brown eyes like Eddie, and he ran track, just like Eddie did. Internet-Richie had posted once about his dick getting hard watching his friend at his track meet, and Eddie had come so hard that night, his track shorts around his ankles, imagining his Richie thinking those things about him.

Eddie was in bed now, in nothing but his boxers and one of Richie’s old shirts that had been Eddie’s for a while now. Still reeling from the way Richie had been acting that night, he logged into his porn account on his phone and scrolled through his dash for a grand total of thirty seconds before going immediately to internet-Richie’s blog. A thrill went through Eddie’s body when he saw that he had just posted. He’d written, “god my friends gonna fuckn kill me with that ass, i wanna plow him so bad” then reblogged it and added, “reminder that my asks and dms are always open if any pretty needy little subs need help getting off. please come be sluts in my messages.” Eddie’s breath caught in his throat when he saw that there was a picture, too, one of him gripping his hard cock, his boxers pulled down just enough for Eddie to see the dark hair around the base of his cock. Eddie moaned at the sight. His cock was so nice, so long and thick and pink. And fuck, his fingers. They were so long and slim, almost as nice as his-Richie’s.

Eddie scrolled a little farther down, his heart racing. There were a lot of reblogs, but some original posts here and there, things like, “what i wouldn’t do to have a pretty guy drooling all over my cock rn,” and, “in the mood to get someone dick drunk. wanna fuck a someone so hard they forget their own name.” One that made Eddie nearly choke said, “want someone i can pump my come into whenever i want, over and over again. want a sub i can keep full of my come all the fuckn time.” That post had Eddie getting out his lube.

It also had him thinking about internet-Richie’s most recent post, his post about his DMs being open.

Eddie bit his lip and thought about it. He’d sent internet-Richie some asks before from his porn blog (his blog didn’t have his name on it, just the teddy bear emoji, since he privately thought the teddy/Eddie rhyme was fun and clever, and also it was cute), and he’d seemed plenty happy enough to respond then. Still, it felt like a much bigger step to DM him, to talk to him just one on one. But the more he read his posts, the more he thought about his-Richie and how he’d touched Eddie that night, the easier it was to convince himself to shoot his shot with this stranger.

Eddie just messaged him a simple, “hi,” with a heart emoji. It was innocent enough, but his heart was still racing.

Internet-Richie responded a lot faster than Eddie was expecting. Honestly he hadn’t been expecting a response at all. But he said:

hiya cutie (; ive been hoping youd message me

Eddie flushed. He couldn’t help but hear cutie in his-Richie’s voice—especially given how often Richie used the nickname. really? he typed back.

fuck yes, ur cute little messages make me so hard. i can tell ur a pretty little thing just from the way you type

Eddie was blushing deep. Pretty little thing. That was hotter than it should’ve been. He wanted his Richie to talk to him like that, in that deep, sleepy voice.

there’s no way you can tell that from some messages :P, Eddie sent.

His heart stopped at the next messages internet-Richie sent.

oh, u dont think so?

why dont u send me some pics to prove me wrong (;

Oh my god, Eddie thought, his breath coming short. His head swam at the thought of sending this guy nudes, of showing himself off to someone who clearly wanted to see him, who would know how to take care of him and fuck him the way he liked, a guy with his crush’s fucking name and body type and hands. It had Eddie’s cock hard and leaking, and he slowly slid a finger inside of himself.

But just because the thought turned him on didn’t mean he was gonna send this stranger what he wanted so easily, even if he desperately wanted to.

you’d like that, wouldn’t you?

He fingered himself open as he waited for a response, working his way up to two fingers. It was nearly impossible to ignore his cock, but he didn’t want to come before the conversation even had a chance to start.

fuck ya i would, internet-Richie responded. Then, in a second message, whats wrong baby? you shy? ill show u mine ;)

Eddie's breath caught. God, this guy even made stupid shit sound hot, just like Eddie’s Richie. This was unreal.

i’ve seen yours, Eddie pointed out.

ya and you musta liked it if ur messaging me rn

Eddie bit his lip. ...maybe

aw thats cute sweetheart. u know i can see all the needy little tags you add when u reblog my stuff right?

Eddie blushed. He’d kind of always hoped he’d read them, but he never thought he actually did. i didn’t know you read those

oh ya, read them, jerk off to them. bit of a size queen, aren’t you? ;) it’s cute. makes me so fuckn hard when u talk abt how u want me to fill you up

Eddie whimpered out loud, sliding a third finger into himself. Fuck, he wanted that cock inside of him so bad. But right now one of his toys would have to do, once he was stretched out enough. He sped up his fingers, getting impatient. Gathering up all of his horny courage, he sent, show me.

what, no please? only good boys who use their manners get dick pics babydoll

Eddie pouted and whined to himself, making quick work of sliding his hot pink vibrator inside of himself—well, as quickly as he could without hurting himself. He moaned as it filled him up, making pleasure spread deep through his body. Slowly pumping it in and out, he reached for his phone. please, he typed, please let me see? wanna know what to picture while i fuck myself with my vibrator. He even added the wide eyed pouting emoji to really milk the whole begging thing. He knew he’d been playing a little coy, but now with the way internet-Richie was talking to him he was getting desperate.

well fuck baby since ur begging ;)

Eddie held his breath as he waited for the picture, slowly rocking his toy in and out, savoring the feeling. He wished it was Richie doing it, wished it was his cock. The lines between which Richie blurred; he wanted to get fucked by either of them, both of them.

What Eddie received when his phone lit up was not a picture, but a video. It was short, just a few seconds of Richie’s hand dragging wetly, smoothly over his cock, but it had Eddie drooling. The room was dark, so he’d used a flash, and it made the mix of what Eddie assumed was precome and spit glisten as the swollen head of Richie’s cock disappeared and reappeared from behind his fingers. Eddie must’ve played it at least five times, fucking himself a little faster, before remembering to say something back. And to take a video of his own. fuck, I want you so bad, want you to fucking ruin me, he wrote back. A part of him couldn’t believe how openly desperate he was being, but he found that he liked it; he liked the way it made him blush, he liked the way it felt to beg, to ask for what he wanted.

Richie’s response came fast: show me kitten. show me how you want me to fuck your pretty little ass.

Eddie moaned at the pet name; casual little nicknames were such a weakness for him. He was already so far gone, just picturing Richie’s cock inside of him, picturing him stroking his cock to thoughts of Eddie. The attention had his cock hard and leaking as he thrust his vibrator even deeper inside of himself, pumping it in and out a few more times before rolling over and getting on his hands and knees. It was hard to take a video from this angle, but he wanted to show off his ass and hide his face. Plus, there was something so hot about having his ass in the air and his face shoved in his pillow, looking like the perfect image of someone desperate to be fucked. He loved the way it made him feel, loved the thought of being so open for someone. For Richie.

He ended up shooting a short video as well, about ten seconds of him sliding his vibrator slowly in and out of himself, letting out soft little moans. He was pretty pleased with the way it turned out, his hole pink and smooth and wet as it stretched around his toy. The angle was a little weird, showing a lot of his room once or twice when his hand slipped a little, but overall he thought his ass looked amazing, if he did say so himself. He sent it and said, feels so good. do you want me to go faster?

As he sent it, he got settled on his back, forcing himself to go slow as he fucked himself while he waited for internet-Richie’s response. It was taking longer than before, and Eddie was getting antsy; it was so hard to drag it out, to not get ahead of himself. But whatever Richie was doing, Eddie knew it would be worth the wait. Still, he pouted as his cock ached, begging for attention.

He almost jumped out of his skin when he heard a knock at the door.

He groaned to himself and stayed put, fucking himself even slower as he waited for whoever it was to leave. But then the knocking continued, loud and incessant and obnoxious, and Eddie knew exactly who it was. He also knew he wasn’t going to go away any time soon, which honestly made him smile and blush. Richie had terrible timing, but Eddie would never be upset to see him.

Reluctantly, he slowly slid the toy out and pulled on his shorts, leaving his shirt off. He still had a pretty obvious boner, but his horny brain did not mind the idea of Richie seeing it. So he strode lazily down the hall, shouting a performatively annoyed, “I’m coming!” Finally, he opened the door, cocking his hip to the side and giving Richie an expectant look. “Can I help you?” he asked, a small smile dancing around the corner of his lips. He had to fight off a smirk at the wide eyed look Richie gave him as he ran his eyes over Eddie’s body.

“Fuck,” he muttered lowly, his eyes trained on Eddie’s cock, which was getting even harder the more Richie stared. Eddie bit his lip and grinned a little, making doe eyes at Richie. But Richie didn’t meet his gaze—instead he brushed past Eddie, his mouth still hanging open as he made his way urgently toward Eddie’s bedroom.

“Richie?” Eddie asked, a little let down that Richie’s hands weren’t all over him right now. But hey, if he was heading to Eddie’s bedroom he figured that was at least the right direction. He closed his front door and followed Richie into his room, where he found him staring at the bright pink vibrator on the bed. As confident and horny as Eddie was feeling, that still made him blush. He was only human. Crossing his arms, he said, bashful now, “I was kind of in the middle of something.”

Richie looked over at him, his cheeks bright red under his freckles. Then he got a glimmer of that trademark shit-eating grin on his face. “Eds, you fucking slut,” he said, sounding both delighted and breathless. “You are so fucking hot.”

Eddie flushed and tried not to squirm, but he couldn’t help but press his legs together, his eyes brightening. Fuck, was this actually happening? Shit, he needed to think of something witty to say. “You gonna do anything about it?” Okay, that kinda sounded like a corny porn, but he had to give himself credit for even being able to form words just after his lifelong crush and personal wet dream had just admitted his attraction to him.

“I think I already have been,” Richie said, still grinning.

Eddie cocked an eyebrow at him. He couldn’t help but smile back. “Oh yeah? How do you figure that?”

Eddie was expecting a confession. He was expecting something along the lines of you think I don’t notice how you look at me? or did you really think those were casual touches earlier? What he was not expecting was for Richie to unlock his phone and hold it up, showing Eddie the video he had just taken, the video he’d sent to internet-Richie.

Oh. Oh. Oh fuck.

“Oh my god, that’s you?” Eddie cried in disbelief.

“You’re telling me you didn’t recognize this dick?” Richie asked, swaggering over to Eddie, clearly enjoying himself.

“How did you recognize it was me?”

Richie nodded toward the Thundercats poster on Eddie’s wall, then to the model train that sat on his dresser. “What other guy has decor like that and the ass to match?”

Eddie grinned and shook his head. “That doesn’t even make sense.”

“Well pardon me for not being especially eloquent when I’ve just learned that the guy I’ve been masturbating to since I learned how to and been in love with for even longer has been masturbating to me too.”

Eddie’s eyes went wide, all thoughts of getting fucked leaving for a moment. “You’re in love with me?” he asked, his voice as soft as his smile.

Richie was not a bashful person, but the little laugh he let out just then was close to it. “Have been my whole life, but thanks for finally noticing.”

Eddie shook his head and stepped closer, until he had to crane his head up to meet Richie’s gaze. “I love you too.”

Richie’s eyes widened behind his thick frames. Eddie had only seen that look in Richie’s eyes a few times before, but he never wanted to lose sight of it again. He always wanted Richie to look at him like that. But then Richie was closing his eyes and leaning down. It only took Eddie a second to get with the program, drinking in the moment just a little longer before letting his own eyes fall shut as he pressed his lips against Richie’s.

It started gentle enough, if deep and passionate and intentional. But then Richie’s hands were on Eddie’s bare waist, skin against skin, and Eddie was gasping into Richie’s mouth, his hands coming up and resting against Richie’s chest. He curled his fingers into Richie’s shirt as Richie ran his tongue over Eddie’s lips, just before pulling away. He laughed at Eddie’s indignant little whine.

“Oh, you mean you don’t want me to take off my shirt right now?” he smirked as Eddie tried to pull him closer by the offending fabric. Huffing, Eddie conceded and let go long enough to let Richie pull the shirt off over his head.

“Oh,” he said softly, his voice a little, awed moan as he drank in Richie’s chest. It wasn’t like Richie had never been shirtless in front of Eddie before, but Eddie had never felt like he was allowed to really look at Richie all those times. But now he could; now he could touch. And he did, running his fingers over Richie’s smooth, warm skin, over his acne scars and blackheads and freckles. “Fuck, Richie,” he sighed before pressing his lips to Richie’s collarbones, trailing them all over Richie’s beautiful chest.

Richie gave a breathless, almost shy laugh as he stroked Eddie’s hair. “Damn, Eds, never pegged you as a tits guy.”

“Oh, fuck off,” Eddie giggled, bringing his lips back to Richie’s. They both smiled into it, getting lost for a moment as Richie’s hands slid slowly down Eddie’s sides. His hands lingered on Eddie’s hips for a moment before he slid them further down and grabbed at Eddie’s ass, making him gasp.

“Is that any way to talk to the guy who’s about to rail you ‘til you can’t walk?”

“What’re you gonna do about it?” Eddie asked with a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Spank me?”

“You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” Richie smirked. He gave Eddie’s ass a playful smack, making Eddie gasp again and fall into him, needing more. Richie’s voice was dripping with adoration as he purred, “Little brat,” and pulled Eddie against him, kissing him again. Eddie went with it easily and happily parted his lips to let Richie lick into his mouth. Richie had one hand gripping Eddie’s jaw and the other on his ass, touching him in a way that exuded a command Eddie was desperate to follow. God, Eddie knew Richie had big hands, but they felt huge on him like this. It was dizzyingly hot. And the way Richie’s tongue was teasing his had Eddie’s knees going weak. His dick was throbbing in his shorts, aching to finish what he’d started, what had been interrupted. When he thought about it all—about playing with himself for Richie, about the video Richie had sent him, about all those things Richie had said about filling Eddie up—he felt himself clench down on nothing, desperate to get fucked. Desperate to feel Richie’s cock so deep inside of him.

“Richie,” he whined into the kiss, pulling on Richie’s belt loops, “please.” He pressed himself urgently against Richie and rutted shamelessly against his thigh.

“Fuck, you’re a needy little thing, aren’t you?” His voice was cocky and teasing, but there was an apparent undercurrent of wonder there as well.

Eddie shoved his face into Richie’s neck and whined, grabbing onto Richie’s wrists without even knowing what his goal was. “Richie,” he whimpered, sounding pitiful and ruined already.

“What do you want, baby?” Richie’s voice made it clear that he was enjoying seeing Eddie this wrecked, and that just made Eddie even harder. “Come on, tell me, use your words.”

Eddie squirmed as Richie held him close, but still not touching him in any relieving way. “I need you inside,” Eddie said, his voice high and soft as he squirmed in Richie’s grip. “God, please, Richie, need you to fuck me. Fuck me so hard I can’t even think. Fuck me like I’m your little toy.”

Eddie could hardly believe the words coming out of his mouth, and judging by the gasp he heard Richie let out, he’d caught Richie off guard too. But if the hard bulge in his jeans that brushed up against Eddie was any indication, he was apparently just as turned on as Eddie was. Besides, Eddie knew from his blog that Richie was really into that sort of thing too—and, apparently, really into the idea of doing those things with Eddie. The realization that Richie had been saying all those filthy things about him had him grinding against him with even more fervor, kissing his neck with a heated confidence. Richie moaned, and Eddie could feel the warmth of it spreading through him. “Yeah, sweetheart? You want to feel me inside you? You think you’re ready for me?”

“Yes,” Eddie sighed, looking up at Richie with wide, desperate eyes. He shivered at the new look in Richie’s eyes, the blue nearly entirely eclipsed by how wide his pupils were. He looked hungry for Eddie; Eddie wanted to feel it. “‘M ready, Richie, please, so open for you.” He looked to the toy on his bed pointedly, but Richie only gave a deep laugh.

“Oh honey, that’s cute that you think that little thing is gonna have you ready for my cock.” Eddie’s breath caught; that toy wasn’t small. Before he could gather his scattered brain enough to react, Richie was scooping him up and tossing him on the bed, the toy falling forgotten to the floor. Richie moved Eddie onto his back, and Eddie went happily, pliantly. Richie’s fingers were cool against Eddie’s burning skin as he hooked his fingers into the waistband of Eddie’s shorts, slowly dragging them over his hips and down his legs, tossing them to the floor. Eddie’s cock was dripping with precome, his chest flushed a bright red as he squirmed under Richie’s gaze. Eddie been dreaming of Richie manhandling him like this for he didn’t even know how long; he couldn’t help the way he reacted. And he especially couldn’t help the pleased little sound he made when Richie murmured, “God, you’re gorgeous, Eds.” Then Richie was grabbing him by the ankles, gently but firmly spreading Eddie’s legs, and Eddie let out the most pathetic, genuine moan he’d ever heard. “Fuck, baby, you sound pretty. You like when I spread you open?” Richie asked. He was smirking down at Eddie, but Eddie could see how flushed he was, could see the thrilled awe in his dark, hungry eyes as Eddie nodded.

“Richie, please,” Eddie whimpered. “I need you so bad.” He sat up, reaching for Richie’s belt, but Richie easily pressed him back against the mattress with a large hand on the center of his chest. The confidence in Richie’s dominance took Eddie’s breath away, and he stayed right where he was, nice and obedient, as he watched Richie get off the bed and slowly undo his belt, then his button and zipper. He took his time dragging his jeans and boxers off, enough time to let Eddie’s eyes linger on the reveal of the dark hair under Richie’s waistband. Then Richie’s cock was bouncing up against his stomach, hard and flushed and fucking long. Eddie moaned at the sight and fisted the sheets underneath him. He wanted so badly to get his mouth on Richie, to breathe him in and be nice and good for Richie on his knees. But he was also desperate to get fucked; his hole clenched down on nothing at the thought, and then it was all he could think about again. “Richie,” he repeated, whining now as he reached for him. “Stop being such a tease.”

Richie laughed as he moved easily out of Eddie’s grip and climbed on top of him. Eddie gasped softly at the sight of Richie above him, his dark curls surrounding his face, his full, pink lips pulled into the most beautiful smile Eddie had ever seen in his life. He ran his hands over Richie’s chest and sides, marveling at the fact that this was really happening. Then, his eyes flickering down, he tentatively brought his hand to Richie’s cock.

“Oh, fuck,” they said, both at the same time, making them giggle together.

“Fuck, Eds, your pretty little hand looks so cute wrapped around my cock,” Richie teased in a low, rough voice. Eddie shivered; he couldn’t tell if Richie was praising him or degrading him, but either way it made his head fuzzy.

“‘M not that little,” Eddie grumbled out of habit. But he was clearly breathless. He’d never been good at pretending not to like Richie’s compliments, however teasing.

“Aw, but you are, baby,” Richie cooed, nuzzling his nose against Eddie’s and pressing a lingering kiss to his lips. “You’re so cute and tiny for me. I don’t even know if we’ll be able to fit my cock inside you.”

“I can,” Eddie whined, both indignant and impatient. He bucked his hips up, but Richie held him down. He gasped when he felt the warm, soft skin of Richie’s cock press against his stomach. Looking down, he saw that Richie had his cock lying on Eddie’s stomach, showing just how deep he would be once he was inside Eddie.

“You sure about that, babydoll?” While the teasing note was still there, Richie’s voice got noticeably softer as he said, “I don’t wanna hurt you.”

Eddie’s chest swelled at that. Cupping Richie’s face in his hands, he insisted, “I can take it.” Then he reached down and took Richie in his hand, glowing with pride when Richie let out a low moan. “Richie, please, I want you so bad.”

“Okay, baby,” Richie agreed, turning his head to kiss Eddie’s palm. “Fuck, I want you, too.” But he stalled. “Have you ever… like, been fucked before?”

Eddie flushed. “Well, not by someone else, but I have some toys. I’m not gonna break, Richie.” He huffed, but the way Richie was looking at him soothed any ruffled feathers.

“I’m your first?” His smile was soft, and while his eyes glittered, there was nothing teasing about his tone.

“I didn’t wanna do it with anyone else,” Eddie mumbled. He tried to look away, but Richie pulled him into a kiss.

“Fuck, I never thought you’d want me,” he chuckled. “Sorry, that was depressing, I just mean I can’t believe we didn’t do this sooner, you know?”

Eddie beamed, a small, giddy giggle dancing on his lips. “Well it’ll happen sooner if you stop talking so much.” But his smile, and all of the little kisses he planted on Richie’s freckled shoulders told Richie that Eddie never wanted him to stop talking.

“Alright, alright, sheesh, I know I’m hot but you don’t gotta rush me.” Eddie was still giggling when Richie kissed him, and he could feel that Richie was smiling too. “Where’s your lube?”

Eddie stretched his hand out and patted the bed for a moment, searching. After what was probably only four seconds but felt like an eternity, he finally found the bottle and handed it eagerly to Richie. “Oh, right,” Richie smirked, “you’re already wet for me, aren’t you?” Eddie moaned as Richie swiped his fingers over Eddie’s slick hole, pressing in just a bit. His fingers went in easily, and he pumped them slowly, drawing little, breathy moans out of Eddie. Richie’s fingers were a lot longer and thicker than his own, and they felt amazing, but they weren’t what he wanted in that moment.

“Richie, fuck me,” he whined.

“Aw, no please? Again?” Richie tsked and shook his head, curling his fingers against Eddie’s prostate, making him cry out. “I told you, sweetheart, only good boys who use their manners get fucked.”

“Please,” Eddie cried. He rocked his hips and grabbed at Richie’s shoulders, at his arms, not even sure what his goal was there other than to get Richie closer, to get his attention, to show him how desperate he was. “Please fuck me, please.” He sounded pathetic begging like this, but that just made him harder. And it made Richie’s pupils even wider as he slid his fingers out of Eddie and pressed a kiss to his lips.

“Good boy,” he purred. Eddie moaned and arched into Richie’s touch, but he only gave Eddie one more kiss on his cheek before pulling back and covering his cock in lube. Eddie watched, entranced, as Richie’s hand moved smoothly over his cock, glistening and slick. Then Richie was gently spreading Eddie’s legs even further and pressing the head of his cock against Eddie’s hole.

“Yes,” Eddie whimpered brokenly, grasping at the sheets beneath him. “Richie, please.” Meeting his gaze, he said softly, “I need you.”

“I’ve got you,” Richie assured him in a voice that made Eddie feel like he was glowing. Richie took Eddie’s hand in his and entwined their fingers, using his other hand to guide his cock inside of Eddie, who gasped at the feeling. God, he couldn’t believe this was happening. He couldn’t believe his first time was going to be with his favorite person. He couldn’t believe he was finally getting exactly what he wanted. Love flooded through him, warm and perfect, somehow both soothing and electrifying as he watched Richie’s face. Eddie’s mouth dropped as Richie pressed into him, deeper and deeper and still fucking deeper, until finally Richie let out a low moan and Eddie felt absolutely breathless. The stretch was intense, and he held onto Richie tightly as he caught his breath. “Are you alright?” Richie asked. His voice was strained, but the care and concern in it was clear. “You don’t have to take all of it if it’s too much.”

Eddie wanted to laugh at the remark or roll his eyes, but with how breathless and dizzied by pleasure he already was, he had to admit Richie had a point. “Just need a minute,” he gasped. Richie ran a soothing hand over Eddie’s skin, helping him even out his breathing and relax. The feeling of Richie’s cock twitching in anticipation inside of him had him letting out little moans as he adjusted, getting more and more used to the feeling until he felt comfortable enough to tell Richie he could move. Richie kissed him before he did, his lips soft against Eddie’s, a reassuring weight. Eddie breathed in sharply as Richie pulled back, grabbing at Richie’s shoulders.

Richie immediately stopped. “You okay, baby?” he asked, caressing Eddie’s face.

Eddie wanted to melt. Richie was always touching him, always jokingly flirting with him, but this unabashed concern and, well, love had previously been reserved for dire situations, like panic attacks or injuries. Eddie couldn’t help the dopey smile that bloomed on his face as he tilted his chin up and kissed Richie. “I’m okay,” he said breathlessly. “It’s just a little different from my vibrator.” They both gave a shaky laugh as Richie nuzzled his nose against Eddie’s.

“Better, I hope?” he grinned.

“Can’t tell yet,” Eddie retorted. Another snarky comment was on the tip of his tongue when Richie pulled his hips further back, effectively sucking all the air—and attitude—from Eddie’s chest. And then Richie was pushing back in, and Eddie let out a moan he couldn’t have faked if he tried, relaxing back into the mattress as his eyes fell shut. It was the best thing he’d ever felt, pleasure and relief flooding through his body. They’d been building up this tension for years; Eddie had figured it would feel good to break it, but it really felt magical, like something had just clicked into place. Feeling Richie inside of him, rocking his hips carefully, feeling Richie twitch as he tried not to lose control had Eddie’s head reeling. Eddie’s eyes fluttered open, focusing on Richie above him, on how flushed his face was. When Richie met his eye, pressing in deep, Eddie let out a small, “Fuck.”

“Yeah? Does that feel good, sweetheart?”

Richie was smirking as he said it, but there was something else sparkling in his eyes. Something giddy and awed. Something that made Eddie sigh dreamily, “I love you.”

Richie’s eyes widened for a moment before he pressed his lips firmly against Eddie’s, his hands roaming over Eddie’s body like he couldn’t choose where to put them, where to touch him. “I love you so much,” he beamed, pressing a few more kisses to Eddie’s cheeks. Eddie giggled at the feeling, but then Richie’s hips moved just a little faster, pressing him in just a little deeper, and he was back to melting under Richie’s touch, clinging to him as he rocked his hips with Richie’s. “Fuck, you’re so amazing, baby, so fucking beautiful. You look so good like this, holy shit.”

Eddie smiled almost drunkenly at Richie’s ability to ramble even when blowing Eddie’s mind. “Feels so good,” he moaned, his voice breathy and just a little bit higher than normal. He wrapped his legs around Richie’s waist. “Please, Richie, please.”

“Fuck, baby, wanna make you feel like this all the fucking time,” Richie groaned as he picked up the pace. Eddie whined in pleasure at the change, and that just spurred Richie to go faster, harder, until he was well and truly fucking Eddie, both of them moaning with every thrust.

“Oh my god,” Eddie cried, “ohmygodohmygodhmygod, oh fuck, Richie, please.” It felt so amazing, Richie fucking into him like this, but he needed that little bit more. His cock was throbbing desperately, achingly hard; he needed to feel Richie’s hand on him. “Richie, please,” he whimpered, “please, please touch me. I need you, I need you so bad, please, Richie.” Eddie was pouting now, grabbing aimlessly at Richie, his legs still wrapped tight around him.

“Fuck, you’re so hard for me,” Richie marveled, his voice sweet and condescending as he wrapped his hand around Eddie’s cock. Eddie nearly screamed at the contact, his back arching off the bed. Richie laughed a little, which just made Eddie even harder. The way Richie spread his precome over his cock, twisting his wrist just so as he stroked him had that familiar tension coiling in his lower stomach. “Aw, does that feel good? You gonna come on my cock, kitten?”

“Fuck, yes!” Eddie screamed. He gripped at the sheets as Richie stroked him, his voice washing over Eddie, mixing with the pleasure of Richie’s touch, of his thrusts. “Yes, yes, yes, please let me come, please, please, please.”

“That’s a good boy,” Richie purred, and Eddie could feel himself tipping over the edge at the words, at how low and affected Richie’s voice was. He groaned out, “Come on my cock like a good boy, princess,” and pure pleasure crashed over Eddie like a wave. He arched his back and cried out as he came, his moans filling the room as he squirmed under Richie, grabbed at him, at the sheets. It was fucking ethereal. He felt somehow so in tune with his body and yet so detached, like he was floating. He was barely cognizant of what Richie was saying, but when he put the sounds together and realized Richie had just said, panting, “Fuck, baby, gonna come,” Eddie felt like a live wire again.

“In me,” he said urgently. His mind was still a little too scattered for full sentences, but he knew what he wanted. God, he felt like he needed it. Like he needed to feel that connected to Richie. “Richie, come inside me, please.”

Richie apparently didn’t need to be told twice; he let out a moaned, “Oh, fuck,” before burying his face in Eddie’s neck, his breathy moans like music in Eddie’s ear. And then, as Eddie was coming down from his own high, he felt the holiest thing in the world: Richie’s cock, twitching inside of him, then his warm come filling Eddie up. It was unreal, being this close to him. Richie clutching at him as he came. It was even better than the little fantasies Eddie occasionally allowed himself. Richie was here, in his arms, pressing kisses to his neck as he caught his breath. Eddie was stroking his hair and rubbing his back as Richie nuzzled into him. Richie’s skin pressed against his skin, his legs wrapped around Richie’s waist, then falling to his sides, but still pressed to him. Still keeping him close. There wasn’t a single thought in his head that wasn’t about Richie.

Richie pulled him from his dreamy haze with light kisses pressed up his jaw, then over his cheeks. Eddie giggled at the onslaught of affection, still reeling from how fucking hot and euphoric what they had just done together had been. But he happily accepted Richie’s kisses, his heart bursting, then racing as Richie pulled back to look in his eyes. “Holy, fuck,” Richie beamed, his face flushed and blue eyes hooded from the weight of his orgasm, even as they sparkled.

“I know,” Eddie said, returning Richie’s grin as he basked in the surreality of having Richie on top of him, his dorky yet charming smile framed by lips that were red and swollen because of Eddie. His glasses were knocked askew, and Eddie instinctively reached up to fix them. With a sense of wonder, he realized that his touch was allowed to linger this time. He ran his fingers down Richie’s cheekbones, over his jaw, cupped his cheeks. “I love you,” he said. The words spilled out over his lips like he couldn’t stand not to say them. And while it made his heart race a little to say it out loud now that the adrenaline and tension was all worked through, it felt even better this time when Richie’s face softened and he nuzzled his nose against Eddie’s.

“I love you so fucking much.” Richie’s voice rarely got that soft, that sincere; it felt like a blanket wrapping around Eddie. It felt safe, secure. It felt like a promise. And if there was anyone in the world Eddie knew he could trust, it was Richie. That feeling of everything coming together came back to Eddie as he lay there under Richie, their lips moving together, feeling light as a feather now that everything was finally out in the open.

[iichaeyj]

help bae i think i might have gone overboard with choosing songs for the ask game <//3

beauty and a beat - justin bieber stickwityou - the pussycat dolls complicated - avril lavigne burnin' up - jonas brothers good girls go bad - cobra starship i kissed a girl - katy perry replay - iyaz only girl - rihanna starships - nicki minaj love you like a love song - selena gomez we are never ever getting back together - taylor swift eenie meenie - sean kingston, justin bieber airplanes - b.o.b. your love is my drug - kesha

FAE 😭😭 THE WAY U HAD TO APOLOGIZE IN MY DMS, TOO?? HELP

beauty and the beast definitely reminds me of jaemin!! it not only suits him, but have u seen him perform this?? iconic tbh

taehyung definitley vibes to stickwitu 😭😭 he pulls out the old man dance moves and sways side to side as he lipsyncs

complicated just screams beomgyu omg <3 like just think about him and his emo look during the loser lover phase?? yeah this song literally Is him

BURNIN UP AND SUNGHOON OMG??? ive said this before, but opposites attract trope and sunghoon just go hand in hand 🙏 and this song is literally that

ngl this one was sorta hard? but i sorta just had the image of frat boy johnny jamming out to good girls go bad in his jeep and it's stuck with me now so,,,

ngl this song reminds me of me ryujin 😭😭 (idk her sexuality and this is not me speculating on it or anything btw) i think she just suits the vibe of this song? and the song is sorta sassy (?) with the lyrics and stuff, and plus, as a bisexual 😍😍 ryujin <3

MARK LEE 💀 he unironically listened to replay by iyaz back when he was in canada and thought he was so cool (to be fair, he was 🙈). like yk the pictures he took in the mirror when he was like 10? that mark lee was listening to replay

TAEHYUN <3 okay but i do have reasoning (surprisingly). for starters, i think that he would be the type of person to feel this way about his s/o <3 and also, he is just literally the only man ever (main slayer taehyun)

MY FIRST THOUGHT WAS JUNGKOOK?? he was the kid in middle school who learned the rap in starships and kept singing it in the hallways, i rest my case

jungwon 🤭🤭 giggling and kicking my feet rn. him and his boba eyes just suit love you like a love song :( especially the bridge like??? tbh i think selena gomez wrote this about jungwon

my main man yeonjun <3 we r never ever getting back together is so like sarcastic and gives off a certain confidence that only yeonjun can have tbh. i want him to cover this song now ngl,,,

this was hard ngl 😭 but i have decided on jake 🧍‍♂️ this song is smth that he listened to daily back in australia. i can just picture him screaming "eenie meenie miney mo lova"

beomgyu and yeonjun bc of this tiktok that's been stuck in my head. it compared their blue and purple hair to the meme of mordecai and twilight,,,

ur love is my drug, especially the chorus, reminds me of like a relationship with heeseung?? not comparing him to a drug, but like the vibe is giving me older boy rockstar puppy love (if that makes sense at all)

send me an ask with a 2000s song and i'll give you an idol !!