#pls its such a fun stim

[sunflowerrboyy]

anybody ever just stand still and swing only your arms and upper body side to side just to feel the off balance effect?

just me ?

[ping-ski]

not enough people talk about "dont turn the lights off" ngl. this song + the daycare theme song have been ON LOOP for me. on loop while i draw. on loop while i do chores and cook. on loop while i work. on loop if i need to concentrate on something- no ANYTHING. it's such a comfort to me. this song has a DEATH GRIP on me. WHIMSY UNMATCHED. you don't understand how much this song fuels me to keep creating DCA content for myself ohhh my god.

"lights on" doesn't even compare for me (WHICH OFC i like the song + with the recent release of "best friend" im still giddy)

which, i feel the need to add, this song is pivotal for my motivation to write EBY (wip dca fic im working on rn). like idk i feel invincible when this song plays ig lmao.

[dullahandyke]

Oh can we fuck off with the realising of things that would make me happier in a gender way!!! Bro I cant even think about achieving them until I come out n that's not happening until the leavings over so stop fucking giving me concrete things I could do!!! Aaaaa!!!

[scarletanpan]

What they dont tell u abt autism is that u get autistic abt it so the desire to realize behaviors uve always performed or started subconsciously performing is in fact a trait of autism and not entirely random is just v neat and interesting but then any person u try to tell stares at u w confusion or pity abt it like. I'm the one w the disorder can we focus on finding this fun and exciting pls

[quodekash]

FUUUUUUUUUUUCKing hell theyre gonna kiss today????

hes so grumpy already I love this so much

the silent conversations chain and toey are having with their eyes oml I cant

pls this is so funny

theyre both deeply in love with someone else so it's jsut so unnatural to them

BUT ALSO id like to mention that the first thing chain did when he had to pretend to be hitting on toey was put his arm around his shoulders and rest his hand there. which is what he's literally ALWAYS doing with pun, no matter when it is, he's always standing next to pun with his hand resting on one of his shoulders

its like he associates his time with pun as being in a romantic relationship 👀

THESE FUCKIN BASTARDS 😭

JUST KISS IM BEGGING YOU

theyre lost in their own little world 🥺

kiIIIIIS

this is too funny, the cuts from "chain. chain what happened next." to ✨soulful dramatic guitar music✨

im sad they didnt actually kiss but also im not surprised

LOOK AT THEM, DUDE

THEYRE SO NATURAL WITH EACH OTHER

I FUCKIN LOVE FRIENDS TO LOVERS SO SO MUCH

half convinced theyre already dating, they just cant be bothered saying anything so theyre waiting for others to ask them about it

PUN IS SO CUTE DUDE I ADORE HIM HES FUCKING ADORABLE

I LOVE THEM SO FUCKING MUCH THEYRE SOIMPORTANT TO ME

if I ever have a romantic partner, this is what I want

I cant explain it, I just wanna run up to them with pure joy and excitement, and for them to hold me back by just pushing against my skull

it just seems perfect, idk why

GB4JHERGB

THE FRIENDSHIP OF ALL TIME

genuinely think I might be more invested in their friendship than all the romantic relationships in this show

im fucking CRYING

my king matt, this was so unnecessary and I love everything about it

why does it suit him so well tho

they should kiss again I think

I feel everything about this image on a spiritual level

THIS ENTIRE AMUSEMENT PARK SEQUENCE BRINGS ME SO MUCH JOY AND DOPAMINE IM IN LOVE WITH THSI EPUSODE

NEW COMFORT EPISODE UNLOCKED

look its really funny but I do feel bad cos this day is not even a little bit fun for him

like q is having a complete shit time

poor chain doesn't love amusement parks but he has to go on the rides with toey to keep up the facade cos toey loves these rides 😭

and its even worse realising Q also seems to love amusement parks, so he would be having a fucking amazing time if he could just go on all the rides next to Q cos they both love it so much 😭😭

fuckin FINALLY

LMAO WHAT

THIS IS SO FUCKING FUNNY I JUST SCREECHED WITH LAUGHTER SO LOUD AND ITS MIDNIGHT

THE PURE COMICAL SHOCK AS HE REALISDE WHAT HE SAID, THE EXCITEMENT FROM EVERYONE ELSE AS THEYR EALISE WHAT HE SAID

I mean to be fair it was REALLY obvious

im surprised no one noticed earlier but also its a bl so im not at all surprised to find out theyre all fuckin dumbasses

SERIOUSLY THO TANFANG IS WHAT I WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP HOLY SHIT

a lot of the time watching bls ill be like "I want that" but its usually as a joke

but THIS?? the fucking adhd bastard (me) who just wants to be near their partner and compliment and always stimming and just having a swell fucking time while the other one loves them but is mildly tired but also in adoration? FUCKIN GIMME

also how the fuck has Q not realised, theyre all so fucking obvious

also also I cant explain it it just feels deeply as though pun and chain are for real dating they just havent told anyone yet

ill make a post about it all at some point maybe (I definitely wont)

PHYSICAL TOUCH IS HIS LOVE LANGUAGE 😭😭😭

I LOVE THEM SO MUCH HE DOESNT HAVE TO HOLD HIM SECRETLY ANYMORE THEY CAN JUST WALK HAND IN ARM NATURALLY NOW

hear me out tho, this gets even funnier if he's actually already in a committed relationship that no one knows about yet

I dont think it's secret dating, it's just 'not super obvious dating to try and see JUST how oblivious all our friends are. its been three years at this point and still no one's said anything. we're starting to lose all hope.'

I love tan so much, the little wave

what the FUCK

what the FUCK FUCK???

THE SOUNDWIN LINE????

HERE IT IS ITS FUCKIN COMIN GUYS

HE SAID IT

HE FUCKIN SAID IT

[insert that gif of the crowd of people in the bar going insane]

holy fucking shit dude holy fucking shit

my legs are literally shaking idk if I can do this

FUCK TO THE YES, FUCKING EXPLICIT ASK FOR CONSENT HOLY FUCKING SHIT

WHAT THE FUCK

AND THE FUCKING SONG IN THE BACKGROUND !!!!

HOLY FUCKING SHIT DUDE

im gonna be here all day

I dont even need to watch the rest of the episode now

I can just go to bed if I want and watch the rest later or smth

dude I cant wait for q to realise that toey is milk frappe guy

HOLY FUCKING SHIT IT JUST PROCESSED IN MY MIND THAT THEY KISSED

WHAT THE FUCK

omg making out in a haunted house, what a dream

the workers watching on the security cameras probably had a blast that day

how funny would it be if there'd been a scare actor in the shadows in that room with them and they'd been about to scare them but they were too shocked with that tender kiss to remember they have a job

he needs to lie on his bed and just stare at his roof and think about that for a while

tbh same

look at him 🥺 he's so lost in that memory

thEY FUCKIN MADE OUT HOLY FUCK

welp on that note I think im done for now

I might finish the ep with my silly thoughts+screenshots later but for now tis the time for sleep

[utdr-stimming]

Eloo

I know you often do deltarune stimboards but if its okay with you can I have a karamatsu stim pls? If not then just anything of your choice

Also do I have to pay for a board or no?

Karamatsu Matsuno (Osomatsu-san) stim board!!!

Honestly I have no clue who this fella is but I'm happy you wanted a board from me!!! Sorry if I didn't do that well haha I do not know what he's all about (I don't know why I added the Doritos bag). Also yeah I'm not making anyone pay for these haha, just having fun

Because this is a non utdr stim board I have posted another stim board today that is just utdr ❤️

x x :)

x :) x

:) x x

[blankisanaddict]

i love... voice polycules.. Urm. cold/skeptic/paranoid PLS 🗣️🙏

Startin off with a good one hehas

First I want to mention the funny haha height difference, as compared to the two corvids, Cold is TOWERING (especially to Skeptic, who's a magpie) and also his wingspan as well, HUGE wingspan compared to Para and Skeppy

Anyway onto more of the ship aspect

I think these three would really get each other,,, Para would def be the most vocal of the bunch

Oorghhh Cold and Skep would be so good at calming Para down and backing him up on anything,,,,, Para would be worried about absolutely everything including its partners and will defo make sure those two aren't doing anything that'll get them hurt (lord Para is not wrong tho)(Para will still fuss at Cold even if void says void doesn't feel anything) Para still loves his idiot boyfriends to death tho <3

I think Para would defo have many breakdowns over not being a good partner or not knowing its own feelings or something happening to them,,,, teehees :3€

Cold would also care for their partners but more in the background, making sure Skep and Para don't go through unnecessary pain (he'd def make fun of them if they got hurt stupidly (knowing the other two are fine with it)), I think void'd be pretty good at comforting them when it comes down to it. He also revels in the height difference, it's especially fun to mess with Skeppy about it- Cold is very entertained with his partners hehe

(I'll admit out of all the voices, Skeppy is the one I really need to pay more attention to- this might be lackluster I apologise-)

Skep would definitely rant his theories to his boyfriends bcuz he knows and trusts that the two will listen to what he has to say and really /get/ it, yknow? And I think he'd want to learn a lot about his partners, they are very interesting critters to him,,, I think he'd try to act stoic, but this man definitely stims to himself when he thinks no one is watching me thinks hehe- He'd pick up so many items and gift them to Cold and Para because he's a man that can connect dots, and his brain connects them ALL THE TIME. Like,, "oo shiny rock. Cold's eyes are pretty shiny. I should give this to void" "oh this is a pretty leaf. The patterns are very similar to Paranoid's. I'm gonna give it to him later" kinda shit, and the two appreciate all of them. I like to think Skeppy would be the type to mirror actions, so he might pick up a stim/nervous tic or two from his partners

God these three would sleep huddled together with cold covering them with its wings adjjfmgkg

[witheringwidgetwrites]

an mc with echolalia repeating noises/words/phrases the demon bros say (especially things in demonic language) and some of them getting Annoyed thinking its you mocking them and challenging them (lucifer, satan) or that ur making fun of them in a demeaning way (levi, mammon) and the general confusion and possible angst from hurt feels bc they dont know this is just a Thing some humans do. i think solomon would get caught in a loop with mc tho especially during nightbringer era like sol makes a Noise, mc repeats it, they go back and forth bc sol thinks its cute n understands the stimming nature it can have and everyone else is just '???? did the humans break???'

sorry if this doesnt make much sense its 3 am for me but i saw the ask abt demons not rly understanding humans and was like. lets take it up a notch with autistic (and other neurodivergent) traits and behaviors. bewilder those bitches some more. also i love ur writing its so good thank you for all youve blessed us with <3

AutismCore me me me me me relatable i love this ask sm i am stimming rN

pls send in a req for the others! if i do all in 1 post itll be soo long (also if u want a longer one send in 1 character and we can get some real angst in here)

Lucifer is one who doesn't mind very much. He's used to the Anti-Lucifer-League mocking almost everything he says, so there's not surprises there. However one evening at the dinner table, he it comes along in passing.

"Yes, I've never quite understood if you enjoy my presence or not, as you seem to mock me so often, MC."

"Wait, what are you talking about?"

"I heard you the other evening, you were speaking of what I had said to you, repeatedly. If I recall, it was, 'Don't dally with the dragons, MC'," he smiles at you, but there seems to be a little aggression behind it.

"Oh no, that's not mocking, Luci, it's called echolalia! It's a symptom of my autism." You go on to explain, and it seems like a small wave of relief washes over his eyes.

"Very well. I'm glad we got that misunderstanding cleared up."

The one who avoids you is Mammon, he's only now been caught up to by you, as you sit into the chair next to him at dinner. It's mostly quiet, until everyone has left, besides you him, and Leviathan and Beel, who are having this own conversation. You speak quietly, "have you been avoiding me, Mammon?"

"Why'd ya think that? Maybe it's you avoiding me!"

"Well, I haven't seen you almost at all in 4 days. Everytime I see you, you turn the other way. You feel the sting of fresh tears start to burn in your eyes, and Mammon can't help but feel a little guilty.

"Why'd ya even want to be around me, I heard you mocking me. You were sayin' 'mammoney' over and over."

"No, Mammon, that's not it at all!" You furrow your brow, and more tears start to come forward. This is not the first time you have been misunderstood by someone about your symptoms. You go on to explain, practically pleading with him to believe you.

"So it's just somethin' some humans do? Really? I think Levi does that sometimes," he chuckles, a small blush gracing his features.

The one who is most hurt by the misunderstanding is Leviathan. For sure. He heard you saying "Ruri-chan" over and over to yourself and assumed you were making fun of him. He hid away from you for days until you caught up to him, and asked if he'd been avoiding you. You missed your best friend dearly. "Of course I have! I heard you mocking me! I thought we were friends." His frown was evident, and you had to pry to find out what he was talking about. "Leviathan, what in the world are you talking about?"

"I heard you! You said," in his best mimicking voice he could muster, "Ruri-chan, over and over."

You were quick to stop him, trying your best to explain. He was still hurt, but he did feel a little silly.

"Oh, I guess that makes sense. I do that too sometimes, repeat things when they're f-fun to say, I mean," he seems to trail off, averting his gaze. His anger had not dissipated, and he felt silly for ever being mad.

"I-I'm, I'm sorry for misunderstanding you, MC."

[like-this-post-if-you]

Wild to still be getting followers and likes when I haven't had the time to sit down and add more. /pos

I really appreciate that you like my silly little blog so much :3 obvious like farming is obvious and yet, you support that the notifications are kinda like a little stim to me.

The support rbs are really nice 💛

Also I love the devious "And I'm reblogging :3" tags and stuff along those lines theyre funny and you're winning at being silly with it.

Big thank you to all of you making this a wonderful experience.

.

I can definitely post ask still, thats a lot easier, so please! send instuff about yourself and maybe youll even find people that have blogs in common.

I dont want to have too many of the same ones right next to each other but, feel free to send some spam bc outside of the ones ive saved to drafts for later* It's empty and my burnouts made it hard to think up stuff bc I can barely think.

So yeah offical "pls send ask if you want (anon is on) of new stuff and you can get more stuff to like."

*repetition ask for later, when the others seem buried. i dont want to spam tags with this, its meant to be fun.

[all-that-tmnt-jazz]

Hello I was wondering if you could do some headcanons of the turtles with a gn autistic s/o pls?

Of course, I can do that.

(Tbh I haven't been screened yet, but I do think I have autism. We won't talk about that rn)

Here we go :)

Leo

He is definitely understanding.

He doesn't know much about autism, at least at first

Once you explain things to him, like how you see the world, things start to become clear to him

He starts learning your "tells" for when you're getting overstimulated

He also starts learning what overstimulates you- certain sounds/volumes, textures, scents, visuals, etc.

He's not perfect, but he's trying his best; he just wants to be a good boyfriend.

He always listens if you start talking about your special interest(s).

He loves seeing you get passionate about things, so though he may not understand what you're talking about all the time, he's always an active listener.

Raph

He tries. He messes up often, but he makes it clear it isn't your fault

He doesn't try to upset you, but sometimes he talks too loud or aggressively, which gets the wrong point across.

He actually starts getting guidance from Splinter about different forms of meditation. He wants to avoid as many miscommunications as possible.

They're still gonna happen, obviously, but he wants to work on it.

If you start talking about your special interest(s), he asks a lot of questions to try to follow what you're saying.

You text him random Fun Facts throughout the day.

(He really enjoys all of them and writes down his favorites)

He knows he isn't going to be the best boyfriend in the world, but he just wants to be better for you.

Donnie

He is definitely autistic, too

Out of all four of the brothers, he is the one who understands you the most.

He understands the overstimulation, understimulation, difficulty reading other people, "tuning people out," accidentally being too rude/blunt, stimming, etc.

If you both have similar special interests, you guys could bounce off of each other for hours.

You once went to school/work on an hour and a half of sleep because you two stayed up most of the night talking.

Because of how close you two are, you actually start learning to read each other pretty well.

He actually feels appreciated by you, which isn't something he feels all too often.

He often sends you links to cute animal videos while you're at work/school- he knows sometimes you need a mind break.

Mikey

ADHD/Autism Solidarity at its finest.

Like with Donnie, if you both start talking, the conversation could last hours.

The difference is that instead of being one topic, it's about several topics.

One topic leads into the next with ease, to the point where the original topic is vastly different than the final topic.

(Neurotypicals would probably have an aneurysm trying to follow that type of conversation)

He can't sit still for more than a couple minutes, so he often paces

If he sees his repetitive footsteps are bothering you, he'll go take a walk/run through the sewers/city for a bit

Once he gets enough energy out, he comes back and joins you once again

He loves his music- almost as much as he loves sharing it.

He quickly tells what types of songs overstimulate you more than others

(He makes a playlist full of songs you don't like so he remembers which ones not to play. He calls it "Do Not Play")

You two are definitely very close since ADHD and Autism do overlap quite broadly.

[razbotz]

VERY LOUD HELLO AND WELCOME TO MY BLOG BELOW. (byf, dni, page navigation, other stuff under the cut. please read.)

haii!! my name is raz or hiro, though i go by other names those r the ones i prefer most (click here for my pronouns.cc, with said other names)

i go by he/him and it/its pronouns predominantly

this blog is a good chunk of the time reblogs about whatever. art, memes, just anything i like. sometimes i ramble and rave and post my silly stuffs so look out 4 that :3

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interests!!!

i have soooo many to list. this blog is multifandom though!! pls go to my spacehey if u want a good chunk of all of em.....

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byf!

- i cant pick up on tone that well, that often... please use tone indicators with me! i really dont mean to offend u in any way! i try my best to use them as often as possible myself lol

- i forget a ton of stuff! blame my adhd as the main culprit

- as with the tone warning, i also cant normally tell if something i say or do or reblog is bad or not... please let me know!

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dni! if..

- you fit basic dni criteria

- just in general bigots.

- proship, comship, or darkship in anyway. what i mean by this is shit like incest pairings, minor x adult, abusive, stuff thats bad and illegal and wrong.

- wilbur soot or dteam supporters.

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page navigation!!

#hiro says important stuff - all the important stuff i reblog and sometimes comment on goes here! u should navigate dis b4 interacting full time.

#hiros memes - my funny hahas go here :)! might also apply to "edits" (i say in quotations)

#hiros headcanons - my silly headcanons, mainly 4 wilro and future4!

#hiro writes - my writing! when i do it. reviews, fics, or au's, they go here!

#hiro stims - my stimboards! my most well received stuffs lol >_<

#hiro rps - sometimes, for comfort or for fun, i rp as certain characters and when i do i use this tag! ^_^

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i WILL update this as i go along because stuff comes to me very slowly! be warned!

thank u for taking the time to read otherwise

oh yeah, and i am the self-proclaimed ceo of wilro, or as i like 2 call dem, time machine. they are my otp and comfort ship. they mean a lot 2 me, theyre basically the face of my page LOL.

(psst. i made this image and blinkie btw. so silly, right?)

[beemers-hell]

You've mentioned on Twitter how ebs relationships with hank and tricky is super different from each other, could you elaborate more?

was gonna draw something for this but once again! fatigue moment lol

Anyway! Yeah they're very different! And thats just cause of how Eb connects with the two! Its a very different set of circumstances between each dude, and she has recognized this and does shit differently depending on who it is she's being all lovey dovey with.

Like with Hank, the way she interacts with him is fairly low key, subtle. She knows he doesn't have much patience and he's always irritated and has a short fuse, and he's "Experiencing The Horrors 24/7", so the way she interacts with/loves on him is very subdued. She speaks quieter, in a less brash tone, she visually indicates she's gonna touch him before she tries doing something as small as grabbing his hand, she definitely does still intentionally get on his nerves and acts annoying towards him but she doesn't over do it; she knows what his limit for playfulness is and cuts it out when she sees he's not willing to entertain it anymore. I wouldn't really say she's "gentle" with him, because she isn't like changing her behavior to be sweeter and more kind with him; she's the same rude snarky jackass that she is with everybody. What she is is more considerate with how she handles him, cause she knows he can't handle the loud, big gestures that she affords to her other partners. And its not like she's changing herself Just For Hank cause he wouldn't be able to deal with her otherwise, she actively makes the choice to change her approach because she Can Do That and has no problem doing so. To expand on the example I provided on twt, with Hank shes like "I'm gonna annoy you because I know you get a certain level of fun out of being made to feel something but I know your limits and when I reach them well be considerate and slow with one another, thats how you know I love you" ykwim. They're very much the type of couple thats quiet and chill about it (until they're behind closed doors, if you get my drift lmao)

Now, with Tricky, she is EXPLOSIVE. She is LOUD and HYPER and goes fucking WILD when she's getting up to romantic hijinks and mischief with that mf. He doesn't have NEARLY the same needs as Hank does so he can just kind of fuck around and not suffer any personal consequences for it, and Eb obviously recognizes it. So the way she handles him is just by not restricting herself the same way she does ""normal"" (as in, not Tricky's level of out of your mind) people and let's full loose. They're loud, they scream alot, they grab wherever at each other whenever they feel like with no warning, they yell obscenities at each other and go out on a whim to do god knows what, they literally use the other like stim toys!! They're insane about each other! Like the example I provided on twt, ebs like "when I die for real promise me you'll devour my flesh and bones" and trickys like "oh fuck yeah I will" and then they squeeze the shit out of each other. They're very much the "heart bare on their sleeves, loud as fuck about it" type of couple!

The only real commonality between these relationships (aside from like, yanno, there being unconditional love felt between eb and tricky and eb and hank) is just that they're all really into fighting, obvs. And not like, argument type shit, I mean they will physically assault each other for fun because they all just like that sort of shit! Eb obvs knows she's not gonna be able to seriously injure/actually murder either Hank or Tricky (at least not without a weapon) but loves the adrenaline rush from putting herself in a position where she could either get her shit rocked or beat the shit out of someone. Hank and Tricky are just bloodthirsty anyway, we all know this. But they all know what's too far and what would be going over the line so its not like anything actually traumatizing is gonna happen between them and her whenever they battle. And plus, Eb kinda sees it as a trust affirming exercise, cause she knows damn well both Hank and Tricky could kill her at any moment's notice. So the fact that she will physically engage them like this and they will entertain it, but not go as far as to murder her without hesitation (or her approval, but that's a whole other thing), proves to her she can put the trust you have to put into someone in order to open your heart up to them romantically, yanno?

[bassguitarinablackt-shirt]

HI I ALMOST FORGOT THE THIRD BC I CANT REMEMBER SHIT BUT can i have earth and the asteroid belt and uranus pls

let the record show i probably would have done mars if i didnt already have a playlisT SORRY I JUST. I LOVE IT OK?? AND I LOVE YOU AND IM SO HAPPY FOR U AND I LOVE SPACE LITERALLY STIMMING BC OF THE SPACE THEME AID FJHDF]

hi venus' followers i promise im normal trust

welcome to the planetarium!!! (ur soooooo normal about space. soso normal.)

EARTH - i write you a personal letter - dear andromeda, thank you for being in my life. if im being honest i dont know where id be without you and your purple hair and space facts and casual flirtatiousness, its all so simple but it makes my life just a little better. i love how silly you are and how positive you are and everything about you. i love talking about space with you and flirting with you and talking about our shared experiences with queerness together. i hope we have many more fun filled adventures together and i cant wait to make out with you under the stars :) -love, ashtro & co

ASTEROID BELT - i give you a planet or celestial object that reminds me of you - venus!!!

URANUS - i make you a pinterest board based on you/our friendship - here you go!!! :3 (im actually pretty proud of it so you better like it fag)

i hope you enjoyed your visit! :) (SPACE NERD 🫵 FAG 🫵 HOT PERSON 🫵 ILY 🫵)

[ezradogteeth]

heyo james, I've got a question for ya :) (pls feel free to not answer if it's too personal!)

So, I've finally started making calls to get top surgery, and I was really excited! like wow this thing I've been looking forward to for years is finally gonna happen, i'll get to wear shirts without having to constantly think about how i look, etc.

but then I started thinking more about it (i guess because its becoming more Real?), and I'm more conflicted about getting rid of my chest. like, hairy tits go kinda hard actually, and like sensory wise they are fun for stimming. plus i feel INFINITE BUTCH SWAG with them. if it was just me by myself forever, I feel like I could be happy with them, but I also find myself yearning for like, being able to be shirtless in public and also having a smooth surface to run my hands down. stuff like that. (also especially the "not worrying about how I look when i put on a t-shirt thing)

so here's my question: I remember you making a comic about how happy you were to have had top surgery, even if u still missed your old chest sometimes, or felt conflicted about it. what do u miss about your old chest? do you ever feel dyphoric with ur current chest? if u have any other insights or things to say, pls do

(p.s. i am considering non-flat surgery, but i don't know how i feel abt that yet because currently I think it'd be the worst of both worlds for me. i don't think the results would be what i actually want: flat chest that's just slightly rounded across the whole thing so it's soft and kinda andro looking)

hi moth yayyy so exciting!! ty for ur question!! longish answer so its under the cut

first i wanted to say that when i first decided to look into having top surgery, after my consultation, i got wigged out and decided to hold off on it for a while. talking to the surgeon made me Really understand that it is a major surgery and everything that entails. a lot of it freaked me out and i ended up deciding to go for it almost a year after that, and i'm glad i took that time to reconsider.

second, i totally relate to the butch swag thing and sensory thing. since having top surgery i've seen a lot more art and photos and people irl who are transmasc/genderqueer with boobs, much more than i did pre-op, and it makes me feel very happy and i wish i saw more of it back then bc it wouldve made me feel a lot better.

i do think that inherently, i would have been able to make peace with my body as is and not had surgery. i was never super dysphoric about my chest and i liked having partners who found it attractive. like you said, if it was just me by myself, or if i was only ever around people who wouldn't see me having boobs as contradictory to me passing as male, i wouldn'tve minded as much.

but unfortunately it doesn't exist in a vacuum like that. the body is a public form, it's how you engage with the world. similar to what you said, i wanted to be able to be shirtless, not wear a binder, be able to pass sometimes, etc. i also wanted the sensory experience of like, laying down flat on my chest, or running without breasts moving which was always uncomfortable for me esp since i hated wearing bras.

i don't feel dysphoric about my current chest, it's more like a passing wistfulness for how my chest used to be or would've been now if i hadn't had surgery. sometimes it's just the feeling of absentmindedly holding my own boob i miss lol. since i had surgery pretty young there's things i feel like i might've missed out on. i live in a wayyy more transsexual ass place now where it's way more normal for a man to have, and show off, breasts, and for it to be attractive, and not negate his identity at all. and i think i would've slayyed like that. alas! on the day to day though, i've also been working more physical jobs where i want to pass as male, so binding would have been very uncomfortable and i'm glad i don't have to do it. and i get a ton of euphoria from being flat chested, and i'm lucky to be around people who find post-op transmasc chests cool and attractive. as much as i liked having partners be attracted to my chest pre-op, i've also learned that there Are people out there who find flat chests just as attractive, and i love having partners who are attracted to the masculinity of my body, because previously i'd often felt like i had to be feminine to be attractive

and re: a non-flat surgery option, i do think it's something to look into! i never really considered it cuz for me it wasn't really the size of my chest that mattered, more like entirely having breasts or not, and i didn't want to go thru the whole ordeal of surgery just to be dysphoric again or end up wanting to get a flat chest later on - though many people do get a reduction/semi-flat surgery and later have full top surgery and it's totally cool!!!

feel free to send a follow up if i didn't answer something in particular or you want me to elaborate on anything ^_^

[yuukei-yikes]

Okay okay okay I have a very specific itch to hear about Mekakushi Dan sensory needs and bc you're the first person I can think of who has drawn them stimming I thought your askbox was the perfect place to launch myself. If you have thoughts here pls feed me. Bonus points for Takane's sensory needs + challenges before becoming a computer program and post str bc I do think her needs would be different than they were before?? I think not having a body for 2 years would do that to you

HI ok i dont have a lot of headcanons in general its mostly haruka and takane and mostly takane. i think haruka is the one ive drawn stimming the most Like i just think that guy would flap his little hands around yknow.

so im sorry i dont have hcs for the whole mekadan. IF UR INTERESTED IN A PARTICULAR MEKADAN GUY u can ask me and I'll come up with something >:3 it just feels overwhelming to think of it all at once. and also u said takane and you know damn well im abt to talk for 1 million hours

ok. takane❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ sorry this isn't sensory needs but girl.. takanes Gamer Secret being found out... idk man it's like. this bitch had been MASKING‼️‼️‼️

even in hs days i think takane feels weird about Touching with her hands. she doesn't have the cartoonishly large sleeves she has as ene, but i think she pulls down her sleeves over her hands like in this specific manga panel i indeed have in speed dial

i wish it appeared more often bc its a cute shoutout to ene later on and also WOOO THIS BITCH HAS SENSORY ISSUES!!! i made a comic abt it once but haruka designing actor with the bigass sleeves because he observed that takane pulls down her sleeves. *bite bite bite bite bite* also this panel has always been a fave of mine bc of autism creature takane and also bc the desk is like. at haruka's chest and he looks like he's sitting on the ground

i also think its very funny to imagine takane kicking ass in games while holding the controller with her sleeves over it and everyone's like ?????girl what. ofc she probably has specific textures she hates and all that, takane doesnt feel weird about touching as a whole.

in several instances of yuukei yesterday haruka and takane casually touch each other and while thats obviously cuz they're close friends, a lot of close friends dont act that way or arent comfortable with touch yknow!! in fact takanes the one to start most physical interactions with him. i could be crazy enough to go and check but im gonna trust my memory. and bc i love art where ene is jumping on shintaro and stuff i like to think takane is Actually touchy with ppl she trusts. also she doesnt register personal space sometimes, and ends up standing too close without noticing until someone points it out. i guess this is a bit contrary to a typical takane interpretation (UR STANDING TOO CLOSE DUMBASS🙄🙄🙄🙄 tsundere moment) but i think it's a fun spin to it. i think kenjirou is the one to most point it out like Girl step BACK ur all in my zone and she's like UGH WHATEVER and haruka also notices but never rly says anything. he probably loves it lol haruka's so overdue physical connection he loves that takane doesn't mind touching him or being close to him. also since they have a big height difference its not like she's all up on his face. i think takane starts letting go more once her ene secret's out and stops caring so much but it sorta comes back when ayano and shintaro join the group. i think shintaro especially would point out UGH WHY ARE YOU STANDING SO CLOSE TO ME or even question why she's so close to haruka or ayano. haruka and ayano are all like NOOO DONT WORRY I DONT MIND but takanes already mortified and is more self aware

another one. takane with her big old headphones. yeah yeah uses them disconnected to get haruka's attention Whatever she also uses them bc she prefers hearing stuff muffled instead of hearing it directly 👍 when she gets overwhelmed she puts those things on with the music to the max and just logs out for a min

OH also this is a canon one😼😼😼 her leg bouncy thing. shintaro points it out in the seventh novel that takane is bouncing her leg and says it's a nervous habit he never noticed on her but TO ME. SHE DOES THAT❤️ takane has huge leg bouncer energy i bet she makes the whole table shake and everyone asks her to quit it and she says Damn ok sorry and stops it for a total of 50 seconds before starting again

anyways in summary hs takane is like. tends not to notice personal space, hates touching stuff with her hands, likes having control over what or how she hears, and has a tough time staying still. POST STR... its all to the max. takane is overly aware of everything. all 5 senses are as much of a nightmare as they are a relief and it's all mixed together!!!!

ok her sensory needs that she already had pre ene are still there but completely amped up, except the personal space one. now everyone is always too close and literally just opening her eyes (HEH!! OPENING EYES!!!!) is super overwhelming bc WHOA EVERYTHING IS SO CLOSE AND HUGE AND HD. i could imagine comparing it to like, wearing contacts for the first time for any fellow glasses wearing people. like u know this, youve seen all this. but suddenly youre watching it differently without a frame around ur eyes and it just feels weird. for takane the frame was a screen instead of the glasses yknow. and to her its A LOT

i think post str takane keeps using her powers and having meltdowns because on top of all the existentialism she has to deal with being alive and everything, suddenly She Cannot Control Anything And It Is A Nightmare. she can't handle the lack of control she has over her needs and body temperature. just feeling hungry or sweating after walking for a little in summer makes her upset. bc she gets her body back during summer so GOOD LUCK WITH THAT GIRL. the clothes she wears feel all insane and irritated and nauseous!!! awful!!! even showers feel strange bc AUGGHHH so much is touching her at once!!! she also hates eating soooo yeah also a thing. i think she's always been a picky eater but post str its like she will only eat like 2 things or something

ON THE OTHER HAND.... it suddenly goes on the opposite end. like for a few days she's nightmare overstim city and then she's SUPER understim and COMPLETELYYYYY over eager about having a body and horribly indulges in like. overeating and running around <- overeating (especially when u usually avoid eating), awful for ur tummy. running a lot when u have chronic pains, also awful for ur pains later. sooo nothing she wont pay the price for later. it needs to get pointed out to her she needs to find a balance and cant have all or nothing (by haruka probably)

the personal space thing comes back here like she gets So touchy and needs hug or death. i think she can be all happy hugging haruka and all of a sudden pushes him away and is like WHOA I NEED TO GET OUT OF MY BODY RIGHT NOW MAYBE RIP MY SKIN OFF TOO MAYBE so it's rly like a light switch all of a sudden she can get overwhelmed with it and revert. like jumping back and forth between seeking and avoiding sensation.

i drew this once but haruka with his arms inside of takane's sleeves LOLLL i think skin to skin rly helps her when she's feeling like she needs sensation. a big part of the sudden overindulgence is OUGH IM REAL!!!! bc like i said takane isnt just dealing with having a body again she's dealing with having her Life again. being alive again. and she LOVES being alive. and the avoidance of all these sensations sometimes piles up and ends on the opposite like I NEED TO EAT💥💥💥I NEED TO SCREAM💥💥💥💥I NEED TO RUN AND HUG AND KISS AND DANCE AND SWIM💥💥💥 yknow. so yeah haruka helps her a lot with it when she needs touching and hugging 🙏🙏🙏 cuz he also wont get offended if she's suddenly like Ok get away from me before i explode🙏

also post str takane To Me also has mobility issues like haruka does bc all her muscles are atrophied from yknow Not moving for 2 years so it's like, even more that she has to deal with. physical therapy is incredibly invasive to her too so it's extra difficult. i think haruka and her do it together and that's why haruka is so on top of what's going on with her, he's the closest and sees her whenever she's the most vulnerable. also their situations are So similar they cant help just gravitating to each other for support. i also think haruka's the one to always point out to her when she's overindulging like Hey i love that ur rly enjoying that bigmac but i can already see you wanting to rip out ur organs later tonight so maybe dont eat a third one.

anyways ermmm takane's biggest challenge is Stop resorting to opening eyes whenever it gets too bad. like i also got sensory issues and assuming whoever is reading also does imagine having the option to just Jump out of ur body when its feeling Awful. ofc ur gonna take it when ur feeling like that. but it doesn't help takane to do it. while it helps her to calm down, it's not good in the long run. she actively wants a PHYSICAL life and work on all this. takane never wanted to die and is super motivated to get better but it's not quick or easy!!! eventually she finds a good balance i think. she's still a rly touchy person who hates grabbing her phone directly without the sleeves in the middle and will only eat like 3 things❤️ but also a hug lover❤️

[v-anrouge]

hi yes hello!!

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i think my love languages are physical touch and quality time/parallel play! i’m very touchy-feely with those i love, so i’m always hugging and kissing and wanting cuddles. (i’m also very touch-starved oops) and i love just being with my partner—whether we’re doing the same activity together or doing two different things and just vibing. 💕

i love making or buying my partner gifts as well!! whether it’s a lil something i saw in the store that made me think of them, or it’s something i created for them, i love seeing my partner light up when i surprise them with gifts 💕💕

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my meds/chronic illnesses make me rlly sleepy, so i nap all the time, but when i’m not conked out i like to cosplay, read fanfic, work on my current hyperfixation craft, play Animal Crossing or Final Fantasy 14, create/work on OCs, and coloring on my phone while watching horror/true crime shows!! (i like my silly little phone games too uwu)

my current hyperfixation craft is drawing!! but in the past it’s been loom knitting, cross stitching, or soap making!! i tend to cycle though these every 6 months 😅 at least i have all the supplies already!!

before i got sick i loved to dance, too—i took ballet, aerial silks, and musical theatre. oh!! i love to sing, too!! i was trained in classical italian opera for a few years, along with musical theatre. on good pain days i’ll twirl around my kitchen dancing to songs on my OCs playlists, or sing along with them. …i’ll freeze like a deer in the headlights if someone walks in on me doing that tho. “>.>

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my partner needs to be… understanding, to say the least. my memory is poor and i’m always sick, so they need to not mind taking care of me every once in awhile during my flare-ups. i like having a partner with a sense of humor, who’s very soft with me. if you’re mean to me i WILL cry (/hj???)

they also gotta tolerate my vocal stims—my latest one has been “koebi-chan~!” and i’m sO EMBARRASSED ABOUT IT??? 💀💀 BUT ITS SO FUN TO SAY??? HELP???

~~

sorry for the long info dump 😅 and tysm for doing this!!! 💖💕💖💕 pls take your time!!

time to work 💪💪💪💪

JADE my hc is that jade actually really enjoys physical affection, at least if it's from someone he's close with, he doesn't seem to mind floyd's affection and while that could be because they're brothers i hc that he will enjoy any affection that someone close to him will give him, be prefers to do it in private but he'll have to problems holding your hand hugging you in public kissing your hand or cheek, he finds it adorable that you're brave enough to ask for affection for someone most people consider dangerous (but u know in reality he's just a little guy) in private he'll really enjoy cuddling with you, kissing your face holding you close and he even bites you affectionately.

whenever you buy jade a little mushroom themed thing you love to see the mask he puts up completely shattering as he smiles brightly before kissing you softly, he then starts to info dump about the mushroom and the type of mushroom, while he absolutely loves the things you buy, the most important to him are the ones you make, he puts those in a special place in display and sometimes u caught him just staring at the things you made him with a very soft smile, he loves teasing you but if he notices it's getting too much he'll immediately stop and kiss your head making you a bit of tea and holding your hand softly as a way to apologize, he truly does care and love you he'll have absolutely no problems helping you and taking care of you when your pain gets too much, he'll always remind you to take your medicine, he'll always make sure you're comfortable when you go take a nap and he'll stay by your side either reading a book or watching something in his phone (probably abt mushrooms) jade makes sure to research about your illnesses so that he'll be able to help you as much as he can, sometimes it's tiring but seeing you smile and thank him for being such a good lover immediately makes him happy and your kisses make any exhaustion go away , a lot of times you'll awake from your naps and feel a very sleepy jade hugging you tight he is wrapped around you while hiding his face, it's adorable to see him in such a vulnerable way and knowing you're one of the only people he trusts to be his true self

a lot of times jade will quietly sneak up on you while you sing your heart out and watch you with a smirk waiting till you notice him, if you haven't noticed him when you finish the song he'll warn you by clapping and then proceeding to kiss your cheek while he starts to praise your amazing performance he loves seeing your reaction and although he's teasing you, you can see that he truly does enjoy listening to your voice

jade would be very entertained by your vocal stims, if you don't like he won't point them out to tease you but he will always let out a small genuine smile or a soft laugh

another person i think would fit is...

LILIA he LOVES hugging you kissing you cuddling you surprising you by suddenly appearing in the ceiling and kissing your forehead he loves your reactions and will always giggle while he does so please make sure to always return his affections he feels so at peace when you're holding him, kissing him and showering him with affection, his favorite thing to do is sit on ur lap while u kiss his face he'll be giggling the entire time and those little wing-like things on his hair flutter (yes they flutter when he's happy i actually work on twst so i can confirm) btw u should def play with them lilia will start purring and melting on your embrace while you do so

lilia loves trying out as much hobbies as possible so anytime u decide to try something new he'll always get very excited and ask to join you, you two will have a lot of fun and spend the whole day laughing when doing so, lilia will come up with the silliest things to make you happy, even if they're clearly supposed to be funny they're also extremely well made and he loves it when you point that out and praise him. you and lilia have a little especial day every month where you both take everything you bought/made for eachother that month and talk about the items, lilia loves everything you give him but when you make them from scratch lilia can't help but blush, his big eyes shining and he can't stop smiling, his heart feels like it's about to explode with affection and love you just make him so so happy he feels so lucky to have you

as expected lilia will have absolutely no problems with taking care of you, in the times where you pain gets really really bad you'll see lilia get serious because he cannot stand to see you in pain, he'll immediately do anything he can to stop the pain, he'll always remind you to drink your medicine and he'll be making sure you're completely comfortable, once you tell him that you are he'll smile and kiss your forehead as he watches you slowly fall asleep, he stays there by your side as he starts to play games, even tho he is very focused in his game whenever you start showing signs of waking up or any sounds of pain in your sleep lilia will immediately drop it and start paying attention to you

lilia loves hearing you sing, you two often do duets, he also loves gaming with you and hearing about your ocs, absolutely adores your drawings and you two have drawing competitions often, the prize??? a bunch of kisses.

lilia finds your vocal stims super cute but if you don't like him pointing it out then he will respect your boundaries and keep his thoughts to himself, if u end up with a vocal stim of a phrase he says a lot tho he'll always giggle and kiss your lips sitting on your lap and batting his eyelashes at you what a bastard

other possibilities: trey, malleus, azul & vil