#pls help me i want to die

[girlyteengirl16]

no matter how much help i get, i don’t think ill ever be okay again

[vaguely-concerned]

playing through where the dead must go with an ingellvar rook and......... oh. rook LOVES loves the grand necropolis actually huh. you can hear it in every line they say. I'm. so full of feelings I didn't expect this to hit so hard but between the voice lines, banger music and astounding visuals (TELL ME this game is ugly and that the visual style sucks while you meet me in these halls of grieving I fucking dare you) I feel second hand drenched with grief and melancholy on the inside what the fuck

(feat. lucanis coming along unwittingly meeting future in-laws and realizing that rook has been clenching their teeth with the effort of only seeming about 5% of the freak they actually are the entire time he's known them fhsadkjfsa. local man learns that the one thing future spouse is deadly fucking serious about is their role as a watcher. it's a little hot)

[spookythesillyfella]

sorry to vent art guys . i promise that next time ill bottle up my emotions and keep them to myself like a good little boy

[bedforddanes75]

george in robbers music video. george in sex music video. george in give yourself a try music video. george in sex music video. george in girls music video. george in sex music video. george in sex music video.

[ghosttotheparty]

love me softly p8

tags from @variousothershit on part seven bc it made me laugh out loud (i think eddie would allow it bc he’s in love)

They dance until the song ends, and the next one begins, swaying with their arms around each other, their hands linked. Steve makes Eddie twirl, and Eddie blushes, his cheeks flushing with heat when he stumbles and Steve giggles.

The next song ends.

Another begins.

There’s noise out in the hall, loud voices singing and laughing, and they keep dancing, hidden away in the dim light of the bedroom.

“We’re so bad at this,” Eddie says, laughing when Steve ducks his head to twirl, their fingers tangled. Steve laughs again, pulling him close, his arm over Eddie’s shoulder.

“We’re doing great,” he says easily.

Their eyes meet. Steve’s are shining in the light, and Eddie falters, gazing at him. He’s so pretty. Eddie wants to say it out loud.

Steve’s lips part like he’s going to say something, and Eddie realises they’ve both fallen still, just standing with their arms around each other, with their fingers still tangled. But before Steve can speak, the door bangs, and they jump apart.

“Someone’s getting laid,” a voice says outside, laughing, and Eddie’s face floods with heat as he glances at Steve, his heart pounding. “There’s probably a room upstairs, come on.”

There’s a moment of silence between them before Steve clears his throat awkwardly, rubbing his cheek.

“Uhm.”

His cheeks are pink, and even in Eddie’s nervousness he feels a rush of something. Not quite satisfaction, but close.

“I should probably…” Steve says, hesitating, gesturing vaguely to the door.

“Yeah,” Eddie says nodding. “Uhm.”

Someone’s getting laid.

His face flushes with heat again, and he moves past Steve to where the tin lunchbox is sitting.

“Here.” He rifles through it, finding a small baggie of weeds and he turns, tossing it to Steve catches it, perplexed. “We can say we were dealing.”

“Oh.” Steve looks at it, his cheeks still pink. “How much?”

Eddie suppresses a smile.

“Don’t worry ‘bout it.”

Steve stares at him, his eyes wide and shining, and Eddie tilts his head fondly, shutting the lunchbox.

“…Okay.”

Eddie smiles at him, watching him fidget with it for a moment before he picks up the lunchbox and heads to the door.

“I’ll see you ‘round, Steve.”

“Wait—“

Steve moves forward, catching Eddie’s wrist before he can reach the lock, and Eddie’s eyes widen at the sudden close proximity, glances over Steve’s face.

“Uhm,” Steve hesitates, holding Eddie’s wrist gently. “Do you— Do you wanna, uhm… Come over this weekend?”

Eddie raises his eyebrows.

“You’re inviting me to your palace?” he teases.

Steve scoffs.

“Yeah,” he says. “I like hanging out with you.”

Eddie’s chest hurts. He exhales, and Steve’s fingers are suddenly hot against his skin.

“Okay,” he breathes.

“Saturday?” Steve asks.

“Uh, yeah.” Eddie blinks. “Uh, my— my uncle works nights, and we were gonna have dinner before he leaves. Is it cool if I come over after that?”

“Yeah,” Steve says softly, smiling. “‘S cool.”

“Okay.”

They stare for a moment longer before Steve seems to remember that he’s holding Eddie’s wrist, and he lets go, glancing at their hands.

“I’ll see you then?” Steve asks, and Eddie nods, melting a little bit. He wants to lean in and kiss him.

But he doesn’t.

On Saturday Eddie is riddled with anxiety, pacing and fidgeting as he cleans the trailer. He changes his clothes three times, finally settling on a pair of ripped jeans and an old KILL ‘EM ALL t-shirt, with a few silver chain necklaces and his rings. He ties his hair back after getting annoyed with it brushing and tickling his neck and face.

“The fuck’s goin’ on with you, Eds?” Wayne asks while Eddie is making dinner.

“What do you mean?”

“You’re fidgeting like a sinner in church, boy. What’s going on?”

“Uh.” Eddie sighs, scooping food onto a plate from the pan, his cheeks flushing. “Nothing, really.”

“Mhmm,” Wayne hums dryly, obviously not believing him.

Eddie sits at the table with him, a leg drawn up onto his chair, and he pokes at his food for a moment. Wayne is looking at him as he eats, waiting patiently.

“I’m going to a friend’s place tonight.”

“Gareth?”

“No,” Eddie says, his cheeks flushing, looking up at him across the table. “Uh, his name’s Steve.”

“Steve,” Wayne repeats. “He from school?”

“Yeah.”

“What’s he like?”

Eddie looks away, back at his food. His cheeks flush again.

“He’s real sweet.”

He takes a bite of his food, glancing up at Wayne, who’s staring at him knowingly.

“That right?” Wayne says gently.

“Mhmm.”

“How’d you meet?”

“Uh, guess we never really met,” Eddie says with his mouth full. “Like, formally.” He pauses to swallow. “But we had detention together a while back and kinda… hung out.”

“Is he nice?”

Eddie suppresses a smile.

“Yeah, he’s real nice. Leaves little drawings in my locker ‘nd shit. It’s cute.”

“You got yourself an artist?”

“He’s not—“ Eddie hesitates, his cheeks hot again. “He’s not mine.”

“You got yourself an artist.”

“Whatever, Wayne.”

Wayne pecks his forehead before he leaves as Eddie is washing up, tells him to have fun and be safe. Eddie just blushes again.

The drive to Steve’s is longer than Eddie remembers. The lights are on when he gets there, over the front door and upstairs, and Eddie hesitates, taking a sharp breath and exhaling slowly before he rings the doorbell.

It takes a few seconds before Steve opens it, looking soft and lovely in a red sweater and a smile, and Eddie melts.

“Hey.”

“Hey.”

Steve beckons him inside with a head tilt, and Eddie enters, his eyes widening as he looks around.

“Your majesty,” Eddie teases, his hands shoved in the pockets of his unzipped hoodie. Steve scoffs, closing the door.

It’s big inside. The ceilings are a mile away, and there are stairs leading up to it, abstract, expensive-looking paintings lining the wall. Eddie turns in a circle as he follows Steve to the living room, spinning to look around. He catches a glimpse into the kitchen. It’s bright.

“Holy shit?” Eddie says, laughing when he looks around the living room. There’s a conversation pit. Eddie’s never seen one before. “You ever fall in?” he asks, gesturing toward it with a jerk of his chin.

“Oh, yeah. Probably got a fuckin’ head injury when I was little.”

Eddie laughs, scrunching his nose, and Steve smiles at him.

He waits while Eddie looks around, carefully stepping around the pit so he doesn’t fall in. There’s more art on the walls, simple framed abstracts in red and yellow and blue. Eddie’s smile falters, and he searches around, eyeing the mantle under the television, the bookshelf. There aren’t any kinds of family photos anywhere.

“Is it… weird if I say it doesn’t look like anyone lives here?” Eddie asks, finding Steve leaning against a wall.

Steve shrugs, his hands tucked behind his back.

“‘S just me, so… You’re not really too far off.”

Eddie blinks.

“Your parents don’t live here?”

Steve sighs, shrugging again.

“They’re in and out. Usually on business trips or, like, vacation.”

“They don’t take you on vacation?” Eddie asks with a raised eyebrow. Steve just shakes his head.

“I wouldn’t go even if they offered.”

“Jesus.”

“They, uh, started leaving me home when I was a kid,” Steve says. “As soon as I was old enough to use the stove myself.”

Eddie stares at him, his heart splitting a little bit.

“That fucking sucks.”

Steve shrugs.

“Sometimes I forget I even have parents.”

“That’s sad, Steve.”

Steve shrugs again.

“When you were a kid,” Eddie says, complaining, looking around again, imagining a tiny Steve in the conversation out. Drawing with broken crayons. “Do they even know you?”

“Nah,” Steve says softly. “I got secrets.”

Eddie looks at him. There’s an almost mischievous glint in his eye.

“Consider my interest piqued,” Eddie says, and Steve grins before he beckons with a head tilt.

“C’mon.”

Eddie follows him, pausing to kick his shoes off at the door when he notices Steve’s just in mismatched socks, holding onto the railing as they go up the wood stairs. It’s dimmer upstairs as Eddie follows him down the hall.

“Uh.” Steve turns before he opens the door, pointing at Eddie so his finger touches his chest. Eddie’s breath catches in his throat. “Before we go in, you’re not allowed to judge me for the wallpaper.”

Eddie’s brows furrow, and he smiles hesitantly.

“…Okay?”

“My mom picked it when I was, like, nine, and I’m not allowed to change it.”

“Not judging,” Eddie sweats, holding his hands up in surrender before Steve sighs and opens the door. “Oh my god.”

“What did I say?” Steve says accusingly, but he’s laughing, watching Eddie look around at the horrific plaid walls.

“Not judging, not judging,” Eddie defends himself, hands still raised. “Well, that’s not true, I’m judging your mother.”

“That’s allowed.”

“Okay, good.” He finishes looking around, grinning. There are clothes on the floor and on the desk chair, and books and papers scattered across the desk, and the blankets on his bed are tossed aside messily. “So these secrets I’ve heard about…”

Steve grins, sitting on the edge of his bed. Eddie’s chest tightens. He wants to kiss him.

“Look in the closet.”

Eddie narrows his eyes, moving over the closet, and he opens it slowly, suspiciously, listening to Steve giggle behind him.

When it’s open, his eyes scan over the hanging clothing before they find the bottom of the closet, cluttered with canvases and a shoebox of paint tubes, and a guitar.

Eddie’s eyes widen, and he looks over his shoulder at Steve, who’s watching him shyly, almost nervously.

“Can I?” Eddie asks, reaching down to a canvas, and Steve nods.

“Go ahead.”

Eddie plops onto the ground, eliciting a soft giggle from Steve, and pulls the canvases out of the closet, looking at them, wide-eyed.

Most of them are abstract, but not in the way the paintings in the stairway and the living room are. They’re expressive, loud and passionate and so full of Steve that Eddie forgets the breathe. He looks through them slowly, gazing at every detail, every brushstroke and smudge and speck of paint, setting them aside carefully, gently.

“That one’s you,” Steve says abruptly when Eddie looks at one, and Eddie looks up at him. “It’s, uhm.”

“Explain?” Eddie questions, looking back at the painting. It’s full of dark blues and blacks and soft smudges of white and yellow and red, intense and heavy but somehow calm. At first glance, Eddie thinks it’s the sea.

“I was…” Steve’s cheeks flush red, and he scratches the back of his neck. “I was thinking about you. When I made it. Is that— That’s weird, I— I’m sorry, it’s—“

“It’s not weird, Stevie,” Eddie says gently, his chest aching. “It’s fucking beautiful.”

“Okay,” Steve says softly.

Eddie gazes at the painting for a little while longer, wondering when Steve did it, how long it’s been sitting in the dark of his closet.

“What are you gonna do with them all?” he asks, setting it aside carefully to look at the next.

“Don’t know,” Steve says. “Probably just keep them all there until I move out and get my own place.”

“You should cover every single wall with them,” Eddie says. “When you get a place.”

“You think?”

“Fuck yeah.”

He puts the paintings back as carefully as he can when he finishes looking through them.

“You play guitar?”

“Little bit.”

Eddie grins and picks up the guitar carefully, crawling over to hand it to Steve, who grimaces and takes it.

“Play me something,” Eddie demand, smiling up at him as he sits cross-legged on the floor again, his back to the closet. Steve sighs heavily, sliding his fingers down the frets, and Eddie watches eagerly as he starts to play.

“The Cure?” Eddie asks when Steve stops, grimacing again as he falters.

“Uh, yeah.”

Eddie nods approvingly.

“Is that allowed?” Steve asks.

“Yeah, ‘course. You can like what you like. Metal’s not for everyone.”

“Even if it’s Toto?”

Eddie shrugs, and Steve laughs, raising that eyebrows.

“You liked that song at the party, though.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“It’s gonna take a lot to drag me away from you…”

“Okay, it wasn’t horrible,” Eddie says, cheeks flushing. Steve cackles almost evilly, looking up at the ceiling and Eddie falls in love a little more. He’d listen to Toto every day if he got to see Steve’s eyes sparkle like this.

“Alright, come on,” Steve says lightly, standing and kicking Eddie gently as Eddie looks up at him from the floor. He puts the guitar back in the closet, but forgets to shut the door.

Steve is different when he’s not at school. Eddie noticed it the first night they spent together, sitting by the quarry in the van, how light he seems when he isn’t surrounded by his douchey friends, how he sits differently, how he breathes differently.

When they sit in the conversation pit to watch a movie, Steve sits with his legs pulled up onto the sofa the same way Eddie does. He has an absent sort of smile gracing his lips, looking vaguely content in a way Eddie’s never seen him before.

Eddie looks away, pressing his lips together and letting his head fall back against the sofa, looking briefly at the ceiling. He’s so fucking beautiful.

They’re both quiet while they watch the movie, and Eddie is barely paying attention, instead focusing on the sound of Steve breathing, and the small distance between them. (Steve moved closer a little while ago, shifted slightly as he set his chin on his knee. Eddie wanted to scream.)

His cheeks flush with warmth when the characters in the movie lock eyes. A boy and a girl, staring intently at each other, the lighting dim and warm. He glances away from the screen at Steve, whose eyes are trained on the movie.

The air feels tight. Like Eddie could cut through it.

The characters kiss after a moment, slowly and gently and lovingly. Eddie’s chest hurts.

“Sometimes I—“ Steve’s voice says quietly, roughly. “I think that isn’t for me.”

Eddie looks at him, eyes wide.

“Kissing?” he says lightly, making Steve scoff. Girls?

“No, just… Romance. I guess.”

Eddie blinks, looking back at the screen. They’re still kissing, arms around each other, the boy’s fingers in her hair.

“Why?” he asks.

Steve sighs and shrugs.

“Nobody’s worked out,” he says. “Feels like they’re all… looking for something I’m not.”

Eddie swallows, biting his lip and picking at the hole in his jeans.

“Maybe you’re… not looking in the right place,” he says softly.

He keeps looking at the screen, watching the boy lift the girl onto a table without pulling away. The girl is smiling.

Steve is quiet for a few seconds before Eddie feels the sofa shift, and Steve’s hand gently touches Eddie’s chin, pulling to make Eddie face him, and before Eddie can even realise how close he is, he’s kissing him.

Eddie gasps, pushing forward to kiss him back briefly before Steve pulls away, holding Eddie’s chin gently. His eyes are wide, reflecting the movie and the soft golden light of the lamp across the room, and Eddie stares at him.

“Woah.”

Steve blinks, his eyes flicking back and forth between Eddie’s.

“Did I misread that?” Steve asks anxiously. His hand is shaking.

“No,” Eddie says sharply, dropping his legs and shifting to face him. “No, no, you— I just— I just wasn’t expecting that, but I—”

“Was it okay?” Steve asks in a small voice. He looks like he might cry.

“Jesus, Steve,” Eddie breathes, reaching up to touch his face, pressing his palm to his soft cheek. “I’ve wanted to kiss you for so long, I…” He shakes his head. He looks at Steve’s lips. He can still feel them on his own.

“Really?”

Steve’s eyes are glistening, and his voice breaks, and Eddie doesn’t want him to cry. He reaches up with his other hand, cradling Steve’s face tenderly, and he nods.

“I have such a fucking crush on you. Christ.”

Steve laughs weakly, hunching his shoulders, and Eddie leans in to kiss him again, squeezing his eyes shut as their mouths crash together, tilting his head and gasping when they part.

“Eddie,” Steve says breathlessly, his eyes still closed, holding Eddie’s face.

“Yeah,” Eddie whispers, pushing Steve’s hair back, tracing a line down his neck lightly. “You okay?”

“I’m so okay,” Steve says softly. “I’ve never been this okay.”

Eddie grins at him, leaning in and kissing him softly.

“Can I…” Steve starts, pausing to bite his lip, his cheeks pink.

“What?” Eddie prompts softly, nudging their noses together.

“Can I sit on your lap?”

“Jesus. Yes, come here.”

He pulls at Steve’s hips, and Steve beams, sitting up and swinging a leg over Eddie’s lap so he’s straddling him. Eddie’s heart is pounding in his chest.

“Never thought I’d make it to Heaven,” he murmurs, wrapping his arms around Steve’s waist, and Steve shakes his head, rolling his eyes.

“You’re so dramatic.”

“Can you blame me?” Eddie asks, sliding a hand over Steve’s back. “Got the prettiest boy in Indiana on my lap.”

Steve’s smile falters. He’s tracing lines over Eddie’s jawline, down his neck.

“You think I’m pretty?” he asks softly, shyly.

Eddie exhales. Gazes up at him. He vaguely hears the movie in the background, but he’s too focussed on the way the soft lighting in the room is making Steve’s stray hair shine like spun gold, on the way his eyes are shining like they’re glass, like he’s a painting that belongs in a museum.

“I think you’re fucking stunning, Stevie,” he says softly. Steve’s cheeks flush pink.

Steve pulls him into a kiss by tugging on his necklaces. Eddie is glad he wore them.

part nine

read the whole thing on ao3

taglist: @dazedandinked @vecnuthy @mareydi @thekingandthejester @michael-the-angelo @mackdaddyofheimlichcountyy @confusionocturne @three-possums-playing-human @narcissist-era @snailcosworld @axltheedaddy @thing-a-ling

[cheriboms]

what if i told you that i had a 500+ page google doc chronicling my efforts to transcribe the bttf telltale game into a full script line by line

[verityblack]

Seeking Merlin fic recs of cannon divergence after s2 ep8 Sins of the Father, with Arthur not going back to hating magic again after learning the circumstances behind his birth and then he and merlin team up.

[caruliaa]

can any1 help me with wehre to watch workin boys i will fully pay for it bc ik you need to but like where to get like the digital ticket with it on it or w/e plss i just wanna see it okay if any1 has a link or smthh 🙏🏽🙏🏽

[microwave-core]

kinda fucked up that the only pokemon realistically stopping me from completing the blueberry dex are the violet paradox trio

[girlyteengirl16]

instantly crying when you see your abuser is so devastating because that means they still hold power over you and they always will

[wadesprincessboy]

My mum just told me to go back to tumblr and keep talking because its keeping me quiet....my dear Jewish mother I hate to break it to you but I am on this app talking about how I love Jesus...Im sorry

[mosspapi]

Gonna b honest. I kinda preferred being actively and pressingly suicidal to whatever the fuck I've got going on now. At least then I knew what I could do to keep myself reasonably safe. Whether I'd do it is another question entirely but at least it was cut-and-dry and made sense. Idek what my brain is doing atp, much less what it needs from me

[maxe-murderer]

Hey fellas I don't have the time to skim thru the video to the summoning rn but I need to know what shoes does Jon wear for wiggly? Cause in that one pic of all 5 of them backstage it looks like he's just in his socks and I need to know

[psychoticwillgraham]

after a rlly bad fight this morning, mom and dad have both agreed to actually pay me for once for doing mom’s whole route for her (which I should’ve been being paid by mom this entire time once I started doing it most of the time) but I don’t expect much. I bet she’s gonna give me like $20 and be like ‘that’s more than enough and that’s all you’re getting period’ and dad, despite him being absolutely loaded with money, will probably only give me $20 too. tbh they BOTH owe me like $100+ a piece. him for babysitting his dog for 8 months and mom for doing her job for her.

[sneakygoldie]

Im cryin sm rn why did I have to bump into drama (pls don’t rant at me, it will make me cry more and I have already had a terrible life before this, too.) So much bad things happened you just made it worst!

[eddis-not-eeddis]

I was trying really hard to get some pictures of fireflies (only got two kinda sorta okay ones) and I got bit ON THE SOLE OF MY FOOT BY MOSQUITOES! HOWWWWW! I WAS WEARING SANDALS!!!!