#pls dnt rblg !

[neilarmstrong]

Last day at work today was during our pride event. These gorgeous telescopes will now be gathering dust in a closet for the foreseeable future. Rip.

[thesummerstorms]

I just needed to share this fuzzy mess. (Pls dnt rblg.)

[jolliejackdaw]

♡Jollie ☆ 25+☆ artesianal french bread♡ ◇🐦 twitter || 📷 instagram◇

♤I follow from @moonlightcreek(personal/reblog)

♤ I like to draw and some fandom stuff! ◇BYF: Read my carrd & adhere to my BYF/DNIs before interacting with me or get blocked; your choice.◇ Enjoy your stay!🏵 art 🖼 || texts📱 ●Main Carrd● ○Commissions Carrd○

[midwestcannibal]

i’m literally so tired of being sad i’m tired of the Need to self isolate i’m tired of sleeping my days away i’m tired of the fear and the emptiness i’m tired of latching onto anger bc it’s the only other emotion that feels genuine anymore i’m tired of not knowing what’s going to happen and getting so worked up over not knowing what’s going to happen i’m tired of the hollow loneliness i’m tired of the shame and the eating disorder i’m tired of the suffocating want wmd the earth shattering disappointment i’m exhausted and bored of it all this can’t be my forever but it’s all i fucking know dude

[femmestoker]

DID talk below

for the first time, I've been aware when a new part (alter??) has split off.

Thursday was a horrible day, lots of things went wrong and I was horribly stressed and high-strung, and even after then I had to go get groceries, which is another stress. I don't remember much of Thursday except lots of bad emotions. And crying. A lot of crying. I was age sliding (is that the right term?) left and right, being a teenager one moment, a child next; it was certainly a wild 9(?) hours.

Then when I got home, I realized that I, Mars, was not the only one around (in the front).

I don't know how Jon split off, I know why, obviously, but I just know that all of a sudden, he was there.

Yes, "Jon" as in Jonathan Sims from horror podcast The Magnus Archives, no I do not want to hear your opinions on fictional introjects, I doubt myself enough as it is--i don't want to hear shit. I didn't choose him, I didn't make him appear voluntarily, this isn't a fun thing, this is a response to intense stress that my mind needed to deal with, and that Mars couldn't. Not on his own.

Anyway, I went to bed after, I think, eating dinner and putting groceries away, but when I woke up, Jon was still there. He wasn't the main one in control, like he had been the night previous, but he was co-conscious with Mars.

Mars can still feel him. Not saying "I" as Mars because it's not just Mars anymore. Jon is still here.

My head has been fuzzy since Thursday night and my hands are shaking still as I type this.

I'm not in any danger, and I have a psychiatry appointment on Monday, with an actually good psychiatrist, whom I will tell everything to. Probably will give my therapist a call on Monday too, though I emailed her Friday morning.

That's the situation. Friends feel free to DM with any questions. might make more posts on this...situation as well because I need to get my thoughts out.

[bog-horse]

me, beating my brain back with a stick: your friends are not ignoring you, it is 12:30 on a tuesday, they are BUSY you fool eat your damn chili cheese fries and go

[kittenpoem]

like every thing each day loses its meaning which ive always been used to, it’s the cycle. but it’s always been replenished and begins again. lately i find there is less and less which serves this role & more days are painful, if anything at all. i’m trying to remember how i found meaning in anything b4 hmmm

[lets-get-dxngerous]

Launchpad: SCREAMING IN FEAR AND FOR HELP Drake IMMEDIATELY: 

BURSTS IN READY TO FIGHT

[mutant-blogging]

im tired of these death/sa nightmares

[heatingpadslut]

i haven't heard from my old therapist since 2019 but honestly i'm still hurt by what she did lmao

basically i saw her for 3 years, paid 150 out of pocket once a week. during this time i started getting disability benefits. at one point she found out that my mom took most of my check every month to help with the mortgage, utilities, groceries, etc. so she offered to only charge me 100 a week. i accepted the offer.

after this she started acting weird. like if money came up she would say something like "you know if i gave all my clients a discount i wouldn't make enough to live".

one time i mentioned offhand that she was out-of-network, and she asked me how much my copay was for in-network therapists. i told her it was 40. she said "i wouldn't be able to keep meeting you for 40 a week, i have bills to pay" and i said i know, i never said i wanted to only pay 40, you literally asked a question and i gave you the answer.

so eventually she told me that we should take a break. i didn't really have a choice in the matter, so i just went with it.

i texted her maybe 3 weeks later (i figured skipping almost a month was enough "break") and she said something like "i can't see you, i told you we need a break" and i was so heartbroken and angry at her that i just never texted her back

she texted me in the summer of 2019 because i had to fill out some paperwork to requalify for disability benefits and i had to have any providers from the last 3 years fill out forms testifying to my disability.

she had the audacity to say "i was sent some disability paperwork for you, and i thought i'd reach out and see how you're doing :)"

i said something polite but vague, and didn't tell her that actually i had just been in the mental hospital.

it's so shitty because she had really helped me, but she became a different person once there was an "issue" with payment. keep in mind she doesn't take any insurance, in a private practice, can basically charge as much as she wants.

i would've rather been told upfront "i can't continue giving you a discount" than this weird we're on a break shit

[bat-chaoticlovercollection--blog]

Man I really need to stop attempting to cut myself w the sharp jaggedish part of my phone :// can't be sanitary and certainly is not effective aside from leaving probably temporary non satisfying feeling scars that r bumpy and prolly infected ://////

[pumpkinspicelexatte]

Where I'm at gender wise currently.

I have some fluidity in either actual gender or presentation

L is the name that fits most

Testing out they pronouns

Gradually testing out male words which em is being amazing with

(her calling me boyfriend feels weirdly amazing in this mode for example)

Binder feels amazing

[gayhanguangjun]

Something that long distance relationships lack that I feel like is really important to me is physical availability

Like if my partners say they’re sick or have too much to do or etc I feel so useless. Part of why a romantic relationship is important to me is that we support each other when times are rough, we help each other when family or other support systems can’t

I want to be able to nurse them when they’re sick like my mom did for me, and I want to be able to help them with housework and moving when it gets to be too much, I want to go to them and hold them when they are lonely and I want to offer my home to them as a safe haven

But I can’t, and all I can do is just offer my sympathy, and it hurts

[harringtontmaa]

⚡ — steve harrington  +  wardrobe ;​

steve’s sense of style is pretty standard prep, with some sport influence. most clothes that he did not acquire from school or various sports teams were picked out  &  bought for him by his mother. as someone who has been involved in athletics for most of his life, steve’s wardrobe contains a myriad of sporty pieces. most commonly found in his closet are gym-ready shorts, tennis shoes,  &  athletic-inspired jackets. if he isn’t planning to play sports or go swimming, steve can most often be found in faded jeans, a nice t-shirt or polo shirt,  &  a simple jacket, although he does sometimes wear khakis. if it’s chilly, he will often add a team sweatshirt or a knit sweater. his tennis shoes ( always nikes ) are especially important to steve,  &  he works hard to keep clean. if he gets his Nikes dirty or scuffed, he will not wear them again until he’s cleaned them up. in fact, he usually keeps a backup pair in his gym locker, just in case. other than his shoes, he tends to stay light on accessories, often adding little more than a watch or his trusty ray ban sunglasses, though he does match his socks to his outfit whenever possible. because steve is relatively long  &  lanky, most clothes tend to be a little bit short on him.  this includes his jeans, which he sometimes wears cuffed to prevent them looking too-short,  & also sometimes his t-shirts. in the summer, he wears his shortest shirts as crop tops with shorts to beat the heat. his colors stick to a very basic theme. the primary colors tend to be the dominant hues  ( blue, red,  &  yellow ), but forest green or orange sneaks in once in awhile, as those are hawkins’ high school colors. steve rarely wears patterns  —  with the exception of a basic stripe  —  &  rarely ventures outside of his comfort zone when choosing clothing. if he’s trying to dress up, steve tends to move toward darker colors. he owns two blazers  — one navy blue  &  one black  — with a few pairs of slacks to match,  &  a single black suit.

[gerrydelano]

jon aggressively commandeering the kitchen in someone else’s home my beloved

[kohakuhime]

“They bully you because they like you and/or have a crush on you” is not ever going to be a good excuse to justify poor behavior, and you shouldn’t reward it or encourage it.