#please tell me im not the first to make this particular reference

[prettieinpink]

Hey i just wanna ask since your blog is really helpful, can you give me some advice on how to stop being lazy or how to be more productive? This have been a problem since i was little and im telling you i wanna make it stop

HOW TO EXIT YOUR LAZY GIRL ERA

LAZINESS IS NOT AN ACTION, BUT A MINDSET. If you are truly committed, disciplined and motivated, you will have no problems achieving your goals and being productive. So, no negative self-talk & a limiting mindset only holds you back. 

EAT THE FROG OR CHICK 

Eating the frog refers to doing the hardest task on your to-do list first to get in your productivity flow and conquer your to-do list easily. 

Or, what I prefer, is eating the chick(s). Doing the small impact tasks first gives you enough confidence to do your harder tasks. Eat the one you prefer!

FIGURE OUT THE REAL ISSUE. Is this a task you hate? Then make it enjoyable for yourself. Afraid of failing? Expect yourself to fail. Is it overwhelming? Then only do a fraction of the task.  Find a solution. DON’T LIMIT YOURSELF TO TIME. Avoid timing yourself or giving yourself a time limit. Just do your tasks without worrying about time, even if you run out, you’ve still been productive.  SET YOUR ENVIRONMENT FOR SUCCESS. Lay out everything that you have to do, minimise common distractions and remove anything that makes you feel anything but productive. MAKE THE TRANSITION EASY, from non-productive to productive. Ensure that you have a customised ritual before being productive, have a particular time to start being productive and have a specific place where you are productive.  AVOID PERFECTION. It doesn’t matter if your tasks aren’t achieved at a high standard, but if you commit to just doing it, that consistency provides more growth and helps to do that same task again.  PLAN YOUR DAY, PROPERLY. Don’t be vague when planning. Outline what you need to do for each task, because when we know what we have to do, it seems more achievable and less out of reach.  BALANCE IS KEY. Taking breaks, eating healthy meals throughout and getting the blood flowing increases our productivity. Please, do not overexert yourself to be productive.

[vvmylove]

Simple Moments with Jake 😍

Can we talk about how fine this man is though- my bbg fr

Jake and Y/N were currently in the same room. Jake shifts his position, looking over at Y/N as she texts. He tilts his head, trying to get a good view of the device in her hands "Who are you texting?" 

Y/N rolls her eyes as she tilts the phone away from him, continuing to press her fingers onto the screen. “No one,” she says teasingly as she sticks out her tongue at him. She was texting no one in particular, but she enjoyed his current reaction. How close he was to her-

Jake's eyebrows raise at her reaction, leaning forward a little more. He reaches his hand out to grab onto the phone, but Y/N was quick to react. She slaps his hand away. “Nuh uh, why would I give you my phone?” she says sassily, tapping onto the screen once again. He sighs, shrugging at her reaction. “Who are you texting? Your boyfriend?” he giggles, trying to catch her off guard with the question.

Y/N tilts her head at his question, “Jealous much?” she giggles, playing along with him. She fakely smiles at him. Jake leans closer, as she curls herself onto the couch. He was hovering on top of her, his heart beating slightly rising as he looked down at her. Jake chuckles, sending a shiver down her spine, “Does he make your heart flutter?” he asks her, referring to the ‘guy’ on her phone. She removes her gaze from the screen, looking up at him. Y/N had not noticed how close he was to her, her cheeks tinting in pink. Her eyes slightly widened, turning her head away. Jake had noticed this, and slowly inches himself towards her. He gently places his slender fingers under her chin, forcing her to look over at him. Jake looks deeply into her eyes, scanning for emotions. Y/N couldn’t contain herself anymore, as her face started to redden like a tomato. She tried to dig inside of her mind for words, but her mind was blank. She ended up stammering instead, “wa- I-”

Jake’s face was only an inch away from hers now, and contemplated kissing her. He had felt this way for a long time, never really finding the perfect opportunity to do so. He could also feel the heat rising in his face, slowly pressing his body onto hers, relaxing himself. Y/N’s eyes widen, looking deep into his eyes. He could tell that she wanted this too.

“Y/N,” Jakes voice comes out as a low mumble, the warmth of his breath slowly blowing onto her lips. Her eyes divert down to his lips, then back to his eyes. Jake pulls her closer, finally pressing his soft lips against hers.  Y/N’s body stiffens, her eyes shut tight. She starts to snake her arms around him, unexpectedly, melting under him. Her heart rate rockets, his breathing becoming rapid against hers. For a few moments, both of them freeze into the kiss. Jake seems to follow along, pressing his body against hers as he places a hand on her waist.

Jake was the first to depart, looking lovingly into her eyes as his other hand made its way towards her face. He caresses her face, “You're so cute,” he giggles.

--

GUYS IM SO SORRY IVE BEEN DRY I SWEAR I WILL POST SOMETHING BETTER SOON PLEASE FORGIVE ME. So heres a drabble (?) until then.

[majorproblems77]

Sacred Realm updated which means im actually so excited to be making this omg

Hi there Sacred Realm fans! :D

It is I, the one who makes the analysis posts on various comics on the internet. (With permission course) Because I love doing them and they bring me joy.

If you are unaware of what Sacred Realm is, it's a Legend of Zelda AU about a new Link who gets a little medallion that makes him a badass, also it can hold the spirits of heroes from across the realms (Including my fave boy ever okay)

Before I begin, I'll get the important stuff done, This is done with permission from @zelda-the-sacred-realm, and all art from the comics belongs to the comic artist. Please do me a favour and go and check it out because it's a wonderful comic and extremely well-drawn and written.

Now, grab some popcorn, and a drink and please enjoy me rambling about a comic that I enjoy so much. :D

Lets begin!

First, some sass

Damn, possessed Link got a mouth on him. Low key I love him, he looks like he could go for round two like right now. Wouldn't be surprised if he went for the hero of time next.

My eyebrows shot up at this.

Time KNOW's

let me repeat that

TIME KNOWS. HE KNOWS WHATEVER IS IN THE MEDALLION CAUSING THIS.

(More on this later)

He knows he knows he knows he knows he knows

I can hear the mocking voice of Link while he is saying this. Time has experience with this particular entity before.

Okay, so here is when it gets interesting.

Possessed Link or this entity I suppose, referring to Time and in turn Hylians as 'Your Race' Tells me a couple of things.

This thing in the medallion isn't a Hylian spirit. So as much and as fun as a dark link theory is, I dont think it could be.

Time arguing that we're not perfect, again referring to Hylians sounds very much like an "I'm speaking with a god speech"

I present my theory on what is in the medallion.

An extra spirit, a god of some description, from the spirit realm. Out to get revenge on Hylians.

Time has been to the spirit realm, in his games. (I am under the assumption that those still occur in this canon please do correct me if I'm wrong here.)

I'm convinced that this thing in the medallion is a deity of some kind because of the eye colour. I can't get over it.

This style of blue, with no pupils.

We've seen it before.

On Hylia.

From Chapter 2 fate PT2

And here is the first time we see it on Link for comparison, With Sky's alongside him for comparison for what Hylian eyes look like.

From Chapter 2 Fate PT3

The colour isn't exact so it can't be Hylia herself I dont think, but, i believe that there is a spirit trying to escape the sacred realm and is using Link to do it.

Okay, enough of my conspiracy theories moving on!

Link you gotta wake up!

Sky thinks so, I love the coloured speech bubble, what a good idea.

OH BOY I LOVE THESE PANELS

You know those scenes in video games when you're fighting off something that's trying to possess you and you have that ominous-sounding echo that seems to reverberate through your head. But is also muffled at the same time?

(If I find a game example I'll link it)

This. Put that noise you think off over this.

KICK ITS BUTT LINK GET IT, GET BACK IN HERE.

These five panels tell so much when it comes to how much effort Link has to go through to fight off the medallion possession. I wonder if its going to be easier or harder for him to fight it off as he gains spirits in the medallion.

You can really feel his struggle and I just love it. The visual storytelling is incredible in this comic and I will fan girl about it all day because I just love it so much

I'm thinking he says this to gauge just how bad this possession is. time seems like the guy who would, especially as he already seems to know what this is.

I wonder if he really is the hero of realms?

Yes, Time. Yes, he is.

The face he dosent remember any time he's possessed by the medallion is a little worrying.

Makes me think that could be used later.

Like, Link dosent remember fighting this ice comet now. What if he fights an enemy while possessed, breaks the possession then has to relearn how to defeat it because as possessed link he's not gained any information.

Man Link is a cinnamon roll sometimes and I love him dearly okay.

Alrighty, thats me finished with my rambling. Thank you so much for sticking with me through this! And thanks again to @zelda-the-sacred-realm for the permission to do these i really appreciate it.

Please please go and check out the rest of the comic if you haven't it's amazing :D

Thats me finished for this chapter, so I'll be headed out!

Hope you have a wonderful day! :D

[lotus-lamps]

COMMISSIONS ARE OPEN! first three people get discounts :)

-> KOFI LINK <-

Discord user: cozmiccupcakes

PLEASE TAKE THE PRICES WITH A GRAIN OF SALT!!! even i'm starting to disagree with them now. it's mostly decided by complexity of character(s) and how detailed the artwork is. i will not strictly follow the chart i provided!

its my first time doing commissions, so sorry if i mess up a lil! i didn't plan on opening them until i got a larger following, but a pal said they were interested so i decided to put this up.

text ver. only plus a more detailed description under the cut! thank you!! (i may come off as a little cold and blunt in the rules section, sorry! i was just trying to keep it as concise as possible to save space. please do not feel scared of commissioning me!!)

p.s. if you want to, please reblog! :) thank you for the help!!

WILL DRAW: ✅

OC's (if they do not belong to you, please get permission first!)

Fanart (any type of media/fandom!)

Ship art (no proships. if it makes me uncomfortable i will turn it down. <- this usually just applies to overly toxic/questionable ships. i will draw ones that i simply don't really ship for you though!)

(and yes, ship art includes OC x OC and OC x canon!)

Light gore + Body horror (not too good at this one, but i can try!)

Animals + Furries (not too good at this one either, especially furries, but i will also try!!)

WON'T DRAW: ❌

NSFW + Nudity (i can draw things that contain mild sexual humor/references, but i wont draw anything past subtle suggestivity.)

Heavy gore + Body horror

Everything else is (most likely) fair game! I will warn you that I'm not particularly good at drawing furries or mecha, but I will give it a shot :) Detailed backgrounds are also allowed! Feel free to ask about whatever, I'm totally fine with drawing most things!

(i will not be making a text version of the prices estimate, as im starting to consider it inaccurate.)

PROCEDURE + RULES:

Dm me on Tumblr, Kofi, or Discord (cozmiccupcakes)

Please try to be fairly specific with your request! no need to get too detailed, but enough for me to work with. Please also provide references if you can! If not, moodboards and text description work too.

50% payment upfront (Kofi only, USD only.)

Prices are loose and negotiable!! as i said before, i no longer particularly agree with my pricing, so it won't strictly adhere to my chart. feel free to discuss prices with me!

No full refunds once I've started. If I haven't yet, I will refund the money to you. If you would like to cancel your commission once I've begun on the artwork, I will keep the 50% you paid initially, unless I am already close to finishing. In that case, you will have to pay the other 50% as well.

I will send progress updates, which is when you can request changes. I will only change things regarding that particular stage! For instance, if I'm on the coloring stage, you can ask for changes with color, but nothing before that. I will not make any changes to the lineart. You can ask for more progress updates if you'd like!

The commission will take around a week or so to finish, more if I have other commissions due before yours. I am also a student and have other things I need to do. Please be patient! I will let you know how many people are in line before you.

Please try to pay the other 50% within a week after I finish the artwork. You cannot commission me again if I do not receive full payment!! I will be flexible with when you send me the money, but know that if it takes far too long (more than 2-3 weeks) then you will no longer be able to commission me as well.

The art still belongs to me. Do not claim it as yours. Feel free to post it on your social media, but please still credit me regardless. Non commercial use only. You cannot use my art for any sort of profit. I will provide you with a non watermarked edition, but I will post it with a watermark. I will usually post the commission art I make, but feel free to tell me if you are uncomfortable with me doing so and I won't do it! I will usually also say who commissioned me, especially if it contains their oc's to give credit, but if you prefer to stay anonymous please let me know as well!

That's all!! I apologize for writing so much, I just wanted to make sure everything was clear :D Thank you!!

[pastanest]

if you’re wondering why I’m having to repost this, or why you were perhaps previously following me but no longer are, please refer to this post. I was able to retrieve this thanks to @rosieathena - thanks so much!! ♡

Spencer Reid x gender neutral!reader

Reid x SingleParent!Reader

- Spencer knew from the first date that you were a single parent, you told him right off the bat because you knew the kind of fearful responsibility that puts on any partner you have and you were fully prepared for him to just up and leave the restaurant

- but he didnt

- he bashfully admitted he already knew because when he’d quite literally bumped into you while on a case, your phone lockscreen was a picture of you kissing a baby in a hospital, he could see baby powder stains on your bag, and your eyes only lingered on him for a moment before they locked onto a stranger’s baby in a stroller that had just started crying

- from then on you had no doubt that he was a fantastic profiler, and you would continue to praise him for being the best at his job, to which he would respond “Im the only profiler you’ve ever met!”

- considering Spencer was in his 30’s, he had decided he was ready to have a family of his own

- in his job, obviously, this ambition was a scary one, because having a family means them automatically being at risk

- but, he was confident that he could be a good protector

- it was 4 days after making this conclusion that he met you, so he had followed up that conclusion with the continued hypothesis of fate

- and when he was introduced to your daughter, he was solidly convinced that fate was as real as you were

- you had warned Spencer that your daughter was very shy and quiet around new people, especially men because she hadnt grown up in a house with a male presence, so he wasnt expecting much of an interaction with her, but he wanted to make a good impression

- he asked what your daughter’s interests were, and your immediate answer was bugs. your daughter loved insects. she loved bringing them into the house to show you and then placing them somewhere and expecting them to stay wherever she left them, which they never did, and that often resulted in lots of bugs roaming your house

- Spencer thought this was fantastic. a three year old girl fascinated by insects? it wasnt exactly abnormal, but it was also pretty rare and outside of the stereotypical interests of young children, which was perfect, as Spencer was also a somewhat abnormal man

- he arrived at your house to meet your daughter, knocking on the door politely and holding the neatly wrapped gift behind his back

- as soon as you opened the door, Spencer grinned at you, and you welcomed him inside

- once the door was closed, you called up the stairs to your daughter, and she appeared in half a second. 0.32 seconds, Spencer counted.

- she was easily the cutest child Spencer had ever seen, and this was doubled when she made her way down the stairs, one of her hands holding onto the bannister as she let one short leg down a step and then the other

- naturally, she ran to you, and you crouched down to her level so that you could hug her in a reassuring way

- Spencer followed suit and crouched down too

“Hello, I heard that you’re an insect expert!” He greeted her quietly, but excitedly.

The little girl visibly gained interest. “How did you know that?”

He looked at you and then back at your daughter, smiling slightly. “Im a secret agent.”

The little girl shook her head, but he could tell she didnt entirely disbelieve him. “No way!”

“Yes way! And on a recent mission, I came across a particular lady who I think you’d really like to meet.”

He could tell he had peaked her interest because she stopped hiding herself behind you, her curiosity getting the better of her. Spencer then handed her the parcel he had been holding behind his back, she unwrapped it to reveal a stuffed toy. Her eyes lit up.

“What is it!?!”

“This is a praying mantis! Otherwise known as a praying mantid, or Mantodea. And you’d better be careful she doesnt find a boy of her species, because she’ll eat him!”

- your daughter squealed with delight at this, and Spencer began reciting countless facts about praying matises, fascinating your little girl beyond belief, and that was the foundation of his bond with her

- after that, every time he came to visit he would have another praying mantis fact

- and once he ran out of those, he found another unique stuffed toy of an insect and educated her with facts about those, too

- you were amazed at how quickly he earnt your daughter’s trust

- naturally, it made you fall in love with him even more

- having a child meant it took a little longer for the three of you to move in together, you wanted to be 100% sure this was a more permanent arrangement because otherwise it could create serious instability for your daughter

- however, Spencer made a promise that even if you and him didnt work out, he would gladly continue his role as a non-biological father to your daughter if that was alright with you; he had grown attached to her, as she had to him

- your relationship was perfect, you still had regular date nights and you were no less romantic than a couple in the honeymoon phase who didnt have a child

- the honeymoon phase didnt exactly end for you two, though

- you fell in love with each other and formed a beautiful love as a family

- the day your daughter called Spencer “Dad”, was a day that had both you and him crying into each other for an hour straight

- he was the perfect role model, advisor, supporter and father to your daughter

- and he was the perfect lover, supporter, boyfriend and future husband to you

[multi-fandom-agereg]

Hello hello it’s me again!! I saw that you know about eddsworld:,,,, Im a little shy to ask but do you think you could do the neighbors caregiver headcannons? Or just Eduardo if that’s easier!!

🥪 The neighbor's as CGS {Eddsworld} 🏡

🎀 ;; of course! (-from someone who was a fan of Eddsworld since 2014.) That show is very goated! This would probably make 12 year old me happy jsjs. I wasn't sure if you wanted all of the neighbors or just Eduardo in particular, so I decided to do everyone but Eduardo has more Headcanons than the other two <3 I didn't add Todd since he isn't really in the show, but if you wish to see a headcanon with them I would be more than happy to write something about them:] anyways enjoy! Ty for requesting!

Jon 👑!

👑 ; probably the most sweetest out of the trio. He doesn't agree with any mischief you think of, but is too shy to stop you from doing it.

👑 ; howeverrr if this mischief ends up with you or someone in danger, then he steps in. He wants to act tough but can't if you are so gosh darn adorable

👑 ; dressups and play dates with stuffies. He always gets so excited when he's invited to these! Literally invite him with your stuffies, he will get just as excited as you and your stuffies are

👑 ; very childish, you could even mistake him as a little at times instead of a CG. But in his opinion he thinks it adds wholesomeness into your regression. Everyone needs wholesomeness right?

👑 ; princess/prince/princex/majesty is the most common petnames he will call you! Really anything involving royalty is your petnames. Besides the occasionally slipping in the petname "bunny"

👑 ; baby spoiler without knowing it. Want cookies? He will get you them. Want to stay up later than normal? He will let you. Want a stuffie from the store? He will get it for you. Just do the baby eyes and you get what you want. Sometimes just a "please" will win him over

👑 ; no thought. Just Jon ✨

👑 ; oh yeah, this man loves cuddles. can you tell?

Mark 💌!

💌 ; full of himself with alot of mistakes in his caregiver life

💌 ; don't get me wrong. He isn't doing anything on purpose, but he's doing the good in the wrong ways

💌 ; with Eduardo's help and Jon's advice he is doing his best he could for his little

💌 ; though he isn't bad at his job! He isn't a baby spoiler, but he LOVES giving you physical attention

💌 ; combing/styling your hair (if you have any), dressing you up like you're at a concert, and doing mini fashion shows! In his opinion those are the best to do

💌 ; the type of caregiver to be like "where does this go..??" While holding a sippy cup of yours. He's trying I promise

💌 ; not big on petnames, however he refers to you as "little one" when talking about you

💌 ; more like a big brother who just wants to make their little sibling happy

💌 ; usually refuses to watch the shows you want to watch with him, but the second it's on he is glued to the TV

Eduardo 🦸

🦸 ; when you asked for this man to be your caregiver my man CRIED. (Happy tears of course)

🦸 ; acts like he's a strict CG at first glance. But is very patient and sweet to you

🦸 ; not at all a spoiler, but if you did something to earn it he'll buy you anything you want.

🦸 ; loves LOVES super heros. He has a habit of rambling it to his little about it. And sometimes would encourage you to dress up as super heros with him

🦸 ; (general headcanon) he's autistic! And he stims alot, and it's most just sounds. Such as; "yippee!, Yay!, Eee!, Yeee!" Or sometimes just straight up screaming. He tries to cut back the yelling part, but sometimes he just can't help but get excited

🦸 ; collects figurines of heros you can play with, you just have to be a bit careful with them

🦸 ; moderates the amount of sugar you drink/eat, knowing it's important to limit things like this. Even if it is a pain, you'll thank him later

🦸 ; "bud/little one/sweetheart/kiddo" is what he calls you. Of course adding ones you wish to be called If anything at all. But he respects your decision if you don't want to be called petnames

🦸 ; matching pajamas! He squeals whenever you two end up matching together. It's one of his favorite things to do

🦸 ; once when you had to be away from him for a few days (let's say school, college, work, whatever) he was too emotional about it for an entire week. Once you came back regressed, he ran to you and hugged you before spinning you in the air. (He misses you alot)

🦸 ; reads you bedtime stories literally every night before bed. He can never do without it

🦸 ; like jon, he's a cuddler. As a cuddler, he is a huge big spoon. Occasionally a head rester when you are sitting in his lap. He likes being touchy if you were comfortable with it

🦸 ; doesn't mind any petnames you call him, but melts if you were to call him "my hero/hero" he would get all stimmy and happy for a whole week

[chushanye]

I finally caught up to dndads after not having listened to it since June, so in order to not make a 1000 posts I will make one mega-post of all my reactions.

35 -> anthony made a reference to him being married b4, leading to me googling it, leading to me finding out there's a "at least im not anthony burch" 4chan meme

out of al the "new" epsidoes (for me) this one is still the funniest

FUCK, the goddamn convo between Normal and Hero you can't just do this to me. you can't just give me sibling dynamics and expect me to be normal about them.

36-> this ep was spoiled form me start to finish so no particular reactions but I will say Anthony is super clever for managing to spin that prophecy to come back around

37-> the contrast of the teens experiences this episode was astounding

ONE PIECE MENTIONED! 👒🏴‍☠️

"you whirling dervish of homoeroticism and pizza" is SUCH a sentence.

38-> god this episode did so much for Scary I fucking love her. "she is holds so much anger but is one of the most loving people" what if my heart bursts from the weight of it all

39 -> in my notes I just have "RONNNNNN RONNN UR IN HEAVEN BABGGIRLLLL I LOVE YOHJHUU."

40-> Freddy's bully character. Will and Freddy's syncing on that joke and screaming about it. Will going "I'm a little turned on rn I'm not gonna lie." Anthony going "Roll for Kinsley scale." all of that almost put me in an early grave.

41-> Freddy making up dumbass plans and the getting way too excited trying to explain them leading to him being out of breath and yelling and making very little sense while everyone else is trying to cut in to tell him how dumb his plan is only for him to roll ridiculously high makes up 90% of this podcast nd I will never get tired of it. also this episode solidified that Taylor is the best character to me.

42-> I hate this.

43-> Marco is way too fucking chill beung on the Titanic I'm gonna need a bit more shock and confusion from this man. like this jist makes me think he like KNOWS everything already.

44-> the next two were my favorite episodes out of the bunch and I have a like lahes worht of notes on them and I couldn't pick my favorites so I'm gonna make seperate posts for the two of those. but in the meantime:

does the ambulance driver's accent count as slavic? cause if so first slavic dndads character lmfaoo

I feel so sad for Normal because we saw thus arc coming from a mile away. I remember listening to episodes and bejng fristrated with how other characters were responding to Normal cause I KNEW it was making this worse in his mind. and like I get them too they're all going trough heinous shit but like...fucking ouch man this was so preventable

45-> Terry Jr and Glenn competing for the title of "most polite swordfight singe Ingio and Westley in the Princess Bride"

I had seperate notes for how much I loved the charactarisation for Terry Jr, Nick, Taylor and Normal so to sum it up the cast brought their A-game I was so fucking delighted.

Freddy's habit of tling over NPC's is so fucking funny. COMPLETELY disregarding the DM is hilarious when it's not happening to me.

46-> good to see Mat being a menece for once.

somebody PLEASE fucking tell me there is fanart for Abe Lincoln from this episode PLEASE.

I know I'm a tween bow at heart because Lincoln being cool again made me so fucking hyped even though that's not the point of his charactarisation 😭 agent Schmegan just brings out the cool dude in him

Hermie's death was way less dramatic than I expected it to be but rhis is only because the amazing artists in this fandom shot my expectations through the roof with the stuff they drew

BONUS: WHODADIT -> Beth is fucking SHINING in this god every joke landed.

Anthony quickly going: "nochinamenmayfeatureinthestory" everyone else going "WOAH" and Mat going fucking "FREDDY?" as is Freddy needs to explain himself???? 😭😭 please

[a-big-mess-of-a-person]

Ive been in such a depressed fucking state lately. I'm bored of everything. Nothing I do makes me feel better. I'm bored. Everything I love doing feels like a waste of energy and time and I get bored quickly. The things I do normally when I'm bored aren't working right now. Not even scrolling through Tumblr dot com is helping right now.

I like listening to the rain though. It requires no effort or thought. Listening to the raging storm that's just outside my window. That's nice.

I just want something to hook my interest. Something to make me want more. Something to make me feel like I'm actually enjoying my day and not just wasting it away scrolling through endless streams of content, posted by people just out there doing their best.

Everything feels like too much energy. Everything is boring, uninteresting and meaningless. I just want to feel some semblance of joy right now. Why is life so miserable.

No. Its not Life. I know it's not Life's fault I feel this way. It hit me right after I typed the period on that sentence. I know I cant blame Life. Life didn't do anything wrong, it's not fair for me to blame it. Sorry Life, I didn't mean to take my annoyance out on you. I know you want what's best for me. I know you want what's best for me and I'm upset I can't find it within me to do those things.

Great now I've personified Life. I think I want to be friends with Life, if I'm being honest. Seems like a pretty chill thing. I've now decided that my new friend Life uses it/its/thing pronouns. Life doesn't really have a need for gender or sex really.

I mean. Nothing really needs sex or gender. Plenty of organisms out there can reproduce asexually. So do we really need sex and gender? Yeah it makes the process more convenient and interesting, but do we actually need it? Idk I'm not a biologist. Just a guy who's really fucking bored and depressed.

Oh hey, that's the first time I've referred to myself as a "guy". That's nice.

I think that's nice because I'm pretty sure I'm transgender (ftm) and I just haven't accepted myself yet. Like, I have the capacity to understand that I share many feelings and tendencies with trans guys, but I feel like there's some part of my brain that is still in denial and not accepting of myself. Idk, the little voice in my head who plans out all my sentences as I type them said "I'm just a guy" and it felt nice to hear that... in my own head....

How many voices do you have in your head? I have 3. I can't necessarily prove it, but please just trust me on this, I've spent a lot of time thinking about it.

Theres the voice that is my inner monologue, it just is saying things all the time. I don't control what it thinks. I think. That voice, I call it the upper voice, just thought of that sentence. Then it contradicted itself as I thought "well isn't that voice just me? That's the primary voice. That's just me, right?" And so now im confused. Ok. I do not consciously choose what that voice says. It's the voice that tells the other voice (the middle voice I call it) what to think.

The middle voice is what I tell myself to think. The upper voice thinks out a sentence for it to say and it does that. They can speak at the same time. They do speak at the same time most of the time. I consciously choose what that voice says. I can tell them a part because they feel different when they speak and I can consciously think one thing with the middle voice, and still hear the upper voice narration.

Then there's the front voice. It doesn't speak all the time, just occasionally. It is the voice that says all the things I notice. Like, it is what tells my eyes where to look if upper or middle don't. I'm not completely sure if it exists, but it has a very particular feeling when it does speak. And when it speaks I can't hear it like I can with the others, I just know it's speaking. Nothing can control what front voice says. I can't, upper can't, and middle certainly cannot. I seriously don't even know if it does exist. It's like a kid at school who you know is there, people talk about them, you hear people talking to them in the halls, but you have never had a conversation with them. You know the name, but you don't actually know who they are. It's weird. Front voice is like a presence that I know is there, but I just can't hear or control. Sometimes I wonder if it's just a different part of my brain hiding itself from my conscious mind. The brain can do that. Your brain can repress traumatic experiences so it doesn't affect you. It's like there's a wall between middle and upper voice, and front voice. It's weird.

Sorry. This entire thing is weird. I don't even know what I'm trying to get at. I think I'm just trying to distract myself. I'm so bored. I am so miserable.

Ok I'm really tired. I'm gonna add some stupid tags to this and go to bed.

Nighty night

[infizero]

initial side order thoughts/screenshots i needed to get out of my system (i have taken way too many screenshots) (SPOILERS OBVIOUSLY)

literally had to take a whole moment after reading this I AM GOING TO SOB. STOP THIS MADNESS. "a quiet spot together" WE GET ITTTTT YOU TWO ARE MARRIED IM GOING TO GO DIG A HOLE TO BURY MYSELF IN

dedf1sh/acht they/them moments HOORAY!!

my lesbian mothers shaking me awake after i ate 50 flintstone gummy

CAN WE PLEASE TALK ABOUT MARINA'S WALLPAPER. I ALMOST SCREAMED WHEN I SAW IT HELP MEEEEEEEE. SHES SO GAY

pearl is so unfazed too she already knows this is what her laptop looks like LMFAO. they are genuinely married

STOP BEING GAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i am just so obsessed with how she looks here. my office manager queen

SO MANY THINGS HERE. ok

1) AGENT 4 REFERENCE RAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! THEY'RE NOT FORGOTTEN!!

2) this entire conversation is so fucking good. of course cuttlefish introduced them to four and pearl has no memory of who they are LOLLLLL

3) after getting stuff like marina's diary and a cool nametag, marina just casually telling us we got a piece of agent 4's FUCKING SOUL was so funny to me. ARE THEY OK?

the noise i let out when i saw this was disgusting

MARINA HAS TEARS IN HER EYES EVEN THOUGH SHES SMILING AND CELEBRATING WITH PEARL GET ME OUTTTTT OF HEREEEEEEEEEE

she is so pearl trash #1 core. this is insane. also the emojis and keysmashing I LOVE HERRRRRR. this entire thing with the diary entries being formatted like a social media story is soooooo cute. also reading "over 4 years ago" gave me psychic damage

ANYWAYS. its past midnight and ive got class bright and early so unfortunately ive got to stop for now. but IM HAVING SOOOOO MUCH FUN I KEEP HAVING TO STOP MYSELF FROM SQUEALING AT EVERY LITTLE THING. AND TAKING 5 BILLION SCREENSHOTS. as soon as i am out that building i am making a beeline back to my dorm and getting right back into this

also writing that made me realize like. good god. the attachment i have to these guys, off the hook in particular, is insane. one of my EARLIEST POSTS ON THIS BLOG was my thoughts on their reveal in one of the splatoon 2 trailers. which i made when i was in MIDDLE SCHOOL. guys i was literally 12 fucking years old when i first saw these two and now i am 19 and seeing them again and heavily involved in story stuff again has made me so unbelievably insane. THOSE TWO MEAN SO SO MUCH TO MEEEEE

even just walking around the virtual inkopolis square made me so nostalgic for splatoon 2 😭 i played the first game a good bit when i was younger but 2 was really where my deep love for the game came from. so going around the familiar layout of everything was. whew.

i am fucking loving this shit so far i am not logging onto twitter until i finish this i will NOT let myself be spoiled. if that mfing all bosses no damage mf tries to snipe me on youtube i will just not let it. simple as that. anyways I NEED TO GO TO BED GOODBYEE

[aroacesafeplaceforall]

I posted 129 times in 2022

That's 129 more posts than 2021!

37 posts created (29%)

92 posts reblogged (71%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@aroacesafeplaceforall

@aroaceconfessions

@tales-of-coffee-and-mint

@thefrogginbullfish

@im-green-salami

I tagged 60 of my posts in 2022

#aroace - 25 posts

#aromantic - 25 posts

#asks - 21 posts

#asexual - 20 posts

#aro - 17 posts

#ace - 15 posts

#lgbtqiia+ - 14 posts

#pride - 11 posts

#please - 11 posts

#aro pride - 8 posts

Longest Tag: 55 characters

#when they realised they were aroace i was not surprised

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

I’ve heard some aphobic bs in my time, but I was wondering if it’s similar to any other aspec peoples experiences?

If any Aspec people see this, if you don’t mind, could you tell me what’s the most bs thing someone’s ever said to you? Thanks

17 notes - Posted October 13, 2022

#4

Things I don't understand and would appreciate being explained to me

The big thing around soulmates and wether you believe or not

2. people who date without being friends first, like you like each other, straight away? like what if you're not similar? huh?

3. people thinking when someone is trans, that it means mtf or ftm and that they must be/going to be on hormone treatments.

19 notes - Posted October 15, 2022

#3

Quickly! Who can tell me what flag this is? 

For those of you who don’t know, this is the AroAce flag. Also refer to as the “Sunset flag” by some.  Colour meanings are:

Blue (both): Represent "the aroace identity as well as the spectrum of aroace identities and experiences"

White: Wholeness 

Yellow: “Love and relationships that exist outside of more conventional ideas of romantic and sexual relationships.”

Orange: Community

23 notes - Posted April 4, 2022

#2

The Aromantic spectrum (a short version)

(I’ll do a longer one later) (maybe) Obviously, no 2 people are the same, so it makes sense that translates to sexual and gender identity. You may not fit under any of these terms you may fit under a few or maybe you find the one that suits you best! Remember you are valid! <3 I’m always welcome to feedback! If you find that this description isn’t correct, for you or for the community as a whole, let me know! I’ll do another post further explaining it with your help!

This is a short list with explanations of different parts of the Aromantic spectrum.

Aegoromantic

Aegoromantic, (previously known as Autochorisromantic) describes those who enjoy the concept of romance but do not have a desire to participate in romantic activities. 

Aroflux

People who identify as aroflux may experience their romantic orientation as fluctuating between experiencing and not experiencing romantic attraction. 

I.e Some times Yes Romance, sometimes No romance.

Autoromantic

Autoromantic people may elicit romantic attraction from themselves, by themselves. (I’ve been leaning towards this slightly)

Cupioromantic

Cupioromantic describes those who do not experience attraction but do desire a romantic relationship. (Another one I lean towards)

Demiromantic

Demiromantic describes people who do not experience romantic attraction until they have formed a deep emotional connection with someone. (According to most definitions)

Desinoromantic

Desinoromantic people do not experience "full-on" romantic attraction, but do experience "liking" someone instead of loving them romantically. (This can be confusing, I’ll do more on this most likely)

Grayromantic

Grayromantic includes (but is not limited to) people who feel very low amounts of romantic attraction, rarely feel romantic attraction, only feel romantic attraction under specific circumstances, or are not sure if they experience romantic attraction. It is usually be considered a romantic equivalent to gray-asexuality. 

This is just a short list, there are many more terms and sexualitys to add. If you want one in particular, let me know! 

174 notes - Posted June 11, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Having trouble?

Are you having trouble figuring out if your asexual, Aromantic or both? Here are some signs to look for!

(You don’t have to have all or any of these signs to be ace, aro or aroace, these are just some hints to help, hell you don’t have to relate to any! Your always valid!)

Asexual

You may have little to no interest in sex or intimacy

You may find others attractive but not be attracted to them

You might enjoy platonic to slightly less platonic (kissing or more) but not want to go further

You may not being intrested in the whole “sexy” thing

Aromantic

You may not find the idea of romantic relationships appealing to you

You may have trouble relating to or understanding media and more about love.

You might have a physical attraction to people but you might not develop a crush on them

You may also present as not understanding why people behave they way they do when "in love" (This was a big on for me)

You might not find any or most romantic plots in books/movies/media interesting or needed (another big one for me)

488 notes - Posted June 10, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[lewiselder]

dude your arm sucks!

we back!

it’s been about a year since the last post. i’m consistently averaging about 1 post a year. that’s a lot, right? 

hope this blog posts finds ya’ll well. not much is different in my life besides everything. ralph has gotten ever cuter, sweeter, and nicer. random anecdote but i actually did some 1v1 sessions w/ a dog trainer, but ended up cancelling the remainder when i started to freak out and realize i loved his personality and didn’t want it to change. moral of the story: abandon therapy and become your absolute worst. 

anywayyyyy - i’ve had 2 very arm-core things happen to me in the past few weeks. bad news for me is good news for ya’ll. i get my day ruined and ya’ll get something to read on the toilet in between actively giving yourself adhd by watching misinformation on tiktok for 90 minutes. 

*whispering* actually, i kind of like when this crazy shit happens to me bc i get to write about it and feel ~special~ :^D

today, we’re gonna cover the first story. i hope to be consistent enough to write up the other story soon. no promises. 

Dude, your arm sucks!

picture this, it’s mere weeks ago - fathers day 2023 - beautiful, scenic sunday weather. handsome clouds with chiseled jaws and just the right amount of buccal fat hang expectantly in a baby blue sky. i’m in a wifebeater with a mullet. 

as ya’ll surely know, i grew up without a dad (as did most of my friends shout tf out to ya’ll) and so i obviously don’t do anything special for father’s day. on this particular father’s day, my friend and i were going to go for a nice walk with ralph, but first we decide to stop by the starbucks next to my apartment.

my friend runs in to order the coffees. i stand outside with ralph, leaning against the side of the building. 

now i’ve heard a lot of words in my 30 years. i’ve heard them put together in all sorts of combinations to form all types of sentences. smart sentences, dumb sentences, long sentences, short sentences, sentences about crypto even. but i was about to hear a sentence i’d never heard before. 

from out of absolute fucking nowhere i hear, 

“dude! your arm suuucks!”

lmao

what

i look up from watching some instagram story of someone i’ll never see in person again for the rest of my life even if we both live to be 1,000, to see a tall, skinny dude standing next to me. his mouth half open, half smiling

i’m literally standing in shock, mostly perplexed and processing, my tiny golden dog who has some of the worst dog anxiety on the planet quakes beneath my feet. 

“what?” i manage to spit out through a half laugh

“dude yeah man, your arm sucks!”

i stare at him like:

if i recall correctly, he introduced himself as Rick at some point during this interaction, so i’ll refer to dude as Rick (have you ever said the name Rick to yourself like 5x? that can’t be a real name. it’s barely even a sound. rick. rick. rick. rick. rick. yeah get fucking real bud)

rick: “nah man see that’s just how i approach life. we gotta just be upfront with one another and then we can move forward from there. like now we’ve addressed it and so we can move on”

PLEASE NOTE: rick was not as well spoken as i am making him sound. while this is largely accurate, i’m paraphrasing from memory. pls add in 70% more incoherence to whatever i say he said  

and i gotta hand it to rick, he was hilarious. it’s awesome pseudo-intellectualism filled with ersatz empathy.

me: O_O

rick: yeah man like look, my leg used to suck 

*rick pulls up one of his pant legs, exposing the lower half of his leg*

now i can’t tell ya’ll his leg didn’t suck bc it definitely fucking sucked but it looked normal to me, albeit gross and dirty

me: bro pull your pant leg down lol

rick: *pouting* fine, but im just saying now that we got it out of the way we can be friends on a real level

me: i don’t think friendship is in the cards for us man. bro i need you to keep it moving

i should mention that, while this is a lot of text, this is maybe 20 seconds of real life interaction, and at this point it becomes clear to me that rick is at least semi-homeless and likely not totally together mentally. this colors strongly how i interacted with him going forward, because idk man what am i gonna get into a fist fight with a houseless dude who is likely high or drunk rn?

sensing my withdrawal from the conversation and my waning interest in friendship, rick resorts to an especially strange move. 

rick: nah man lemme get a real good look at it and we’ll get through this

rick bends down and puts his face maybe 6 inches from my arm, his bloodshot eyes wide as dinner plates

me: *recoiling* alright man see now im really about to beat the shit out of you if you don’t get the fuck on 

rick (as if i just lit a firework during a fancy dinner party): woah fuck ok man, fine. trust me your legs are as big as my waist, i know you could beat my ass. but i might be able to out run you in a straight line spring *chuckles to himself* but obviously you’re a strong guy

at this point, rick starts walking away still kind of talking about how i look strong. he opens the door to starbucks and heads in. he’s their problem now. 

mind you, starbucks is packed so it’s taking forever for my friend to get the drinks. 

maybe 40 seconds later the door to starbucks flings open

rick is back, baby!

“would a cigarette make it up to ya?”

me: lol brother i don’t smoke

rick: yeah me neither *lights cigarette in his mouth* 

we stand there almost shoulder to shoulder like old lovers who’ve run out of things to talk about but just like to enjoy each others company

rick: man you know what show my kids love?

me: what show rick

rick: inspector gadget man, you ever seen it?

me: yeah man that’s pretty old, i’m surprised that’s still on

rick: yeah they love it. you know who you remind me of? Dr. Claw. he’s the villain but he’s a badass. his arm sucks too. 

me: rick...

rick: im just saying man like obviously this shit has just made you tougher in life man. you’re jacked man, i hope my kids grow up to be like you

me: rick, brother, its fathers day, shouldn’t you be with your kids

rick, speaking more to god than to me: *softly* it’s fathers day

me: i’m gonna go out on a limb here and guess their mom has custody

at this point it’s felt like rick and i have been on this island together for a fucking eternity. seasons have changed, wars have risen and subsided, babies have been born and gone to college and decided to hit the snooze button on life by then going to grad school. 

i’ve literally had relationships shorter than this. not that i don’t enjoy talking to my old buddy rick, but man what i wouldn’t give for him to walk away, or for this starbucks to blow up, or for me to be assassinated. something, anything. 

FINALLY, my friend comes outside with the fucking coffees

she walks up to us perplexed

me: alright man i gotta go now 

*i start walking away*

rick: *smoking his cigarette that didn’t make it up to me and following us as if we’re all in the world’s worst band headed to practice together* aw yeah see now we were just talking about how his arm sucks and -

now i can’t have this fucking dude come walking with us, and i’d mostly been a good sport to him up to this point with the exception of when he tried to do a gynecological exam on my left arm

me, turning and getting into ricks face: ok i’m seriously gonna smack the fuck out of you if you don’t walk away right now

the 2nd threat seemed to do the trick. 

rick muttered some random shit under his breath before finally using his formerly sucky leg to saunter off back towards starbucks.

good night, sweet prince

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I should say that at no point was I really going to fight Rick. He was clearly unwell, but the only way to really get him to leave was to threaten him. During the entirety of the interaction I was more amused and annoyed than mad (save for when he bent down and put his face in my arm). 

It did however bring me back to a place I spent the majority of my time when I was younger. My experience growing up disabled was one fraught with the preservation of what little pride I had. When I felt someone disrespected me, the overwhelming sense of obligation to do something about it (fight them, argue back, whatever) was one of the strongest driving forces of my formative years. And to be honest, feeling as if you have to fight and claw for the sense of pride most able-bodied people get to inherently enjoy is a tremendously heavy burden to carry. 

One of the reasons I so relate to people who have some type of outward presenting marginalized identity, whether they’re Black or Brown or disabled or non-gender-conforming or whatever, is because it’s such an insanely specific experience to have people come up to you and say the absolute wildest shit possible. And they expect there to be no consequences from their actions, which is such a motherfucking frustrating dynamic to experience. It’s hard to explain to someone who’s never gone through it. 

Anyway, that’s pretty much it. I haven’t seen Rick since. I do wish him the best, as I know he had good intentions. And while him and I ultimately weren’t able to enjoy a Newport together like he wanted (but Rick doesn’t smoke), he did give me an interesting story to add to the collection. 

All in all, not my worst father’s day.

if u read this far i owe u a cigarette

[hearts401]

!!! I dont have a ton planned out juuust yet but it has a lot of journalism evil space ceos and pollution. sooo much pollution. i havent decided if i want them on a different planet or like. floating in space. but probably the former bc i love it and. space suits. also with steampunk comes child labor. classism. factory disasters. their ship is built to prioritize infrastructure over. workers' lives.

honestly almost all my inspiration comes from. industrial era and muckrakers, late 1800s AUGH i love it.

as for what the ship looks like... a lot of ppl go for blimps but blimps werent invented until the late 1900's. so itd make more sense to go for the wright brothers' plane. but thats not super space-y

but i could also take inspo from early early space craft. sputnic, bumper-WAC, Apollo 11, you get it. but more gears and levers.

or 1800's submarines would work.

tell me this shit aint steampunk as hell. nautilus byyyy rober fulton. well a recreation but still. built in the 1800's. but the FIRST submarine was made in 1620 which is neat

so the story mainly surrounds journalism and abuse of workers and whatnot. because i think factory disasters and muckrakers really build up that steampunk vibe well.

main character is a new-ish journalist who keeps her head down mostly but yknow. she's got freedom of speech guys. terrible regulations, horrible factory stuff. made to possibly study things in space id think. a FEW sci-fi references. because it IS technically sci-fi.

also her last name is riis for no reason in particular.

and while the punk aesthetic might not fit in the vibe im going for, the themes are. put the punk in steampunk guys please. one of the earliest places it was in was new york. guys guess what new york is built off of. INDUSTRIALIZATION!!! its very important i dont think its explored enough. ppl dont explore enough of the horrible government parts of steampunk.

i do love the big corporations yknow. killing people. for their own gain. i love the trusts and monopolies. augh.

anyways guys i lost the plot here remember that steampunk may be a cool aesthetic but there's also deeper themes you can explore with it and i think we should!!

if u think abt it steampunk astronauts would just look like rlly old diving suits

do you see my vision

[bbybaku]

cranky no nut november boyfriend shigaraki

yes i know its july. 

1.8 k words 

slow burn but there is smut 

warnings: angry shig, humiliation, degrading, oral (fem recieving), use of vibrator, shoes on bed, angst, fluff, mentions of masturbtion

your boyfriend, tomura shigaraki, had made a bet with his friends, about who could last the longest during no nut november.

you thought a month wouldn’t be that bad, right? you guys could handle it.

the first few days were nothing. you two were busy and didnt think that much of it. 

but the first weekend shiggy had invited you over to watch a movie. which was usually code for “let’s fuck”

you went over to his apartment, about 20 minutes into the movie you slipped your hand under the blanket, feeling around for his cock.

“hey” he said softly but irritated as he picked up your hand and moved it.

“what? we always-“ you asked

“i’m taking this month seriously, i can eat you out or something but we cant, you cant” he said

 you were not expecting him to take it this seriously.

you knew your boyfriend he never took anything seriously? why did he have to take this stupid month seriously.

“well, do you want?” he asked as he ran his fingers over your clothed clit.

“no let’s just hang out tonight” you said.

“okay” he said then kissed you on the head and pulled you into his lap.

you could feel his erection. but you knew you had to ignore it. 

week 2 was easy because shigaraki was out of town for a work trip.

you didn’t know how he was doing it. no sex was one thing, but not even masturbating?

you had been touching yourself every day to the thought of him, the pictures you had of him and sometimes 

the movies you had made together.

the night he got back he came straight to your apartment.

he looked pale.

you went in for a hug, but he pushed you away.

“no” he snapped “ i just wanted to see you”

you gulped “oh okay”

you cooked dinner and he told you about the trip.

the space between your thighs ached the entire evening.

you asked him to stay the night but he said he no.

and he left. 

it was day 15. you needed him. your hand could only do so much. you couldnt do what he could do. he knew your body better than you did. 

you texted him to hang out. 

the two of you got coffee then made out in the car. 

his mouth tasted so good. your body presses against the console, arms around his neck. the kiss starting equal but he very quickly shoved his tongue in your mouth. he took your jaw in his hand and held your face while his tongue circled yours. you sucked on his bottom lip. his hand found your tit. your hand found his crotch. 

shigaraki instantly pulled away, he was pissed “how many fucking times do i have to tell you no?” 

you sighed “im sorry i just-” 

he pushed his hair out of his face and took your jaw in his hand again. “look at me. i want to be inside of you so bad. i think about you all the time. i love you so much but we just cant right now.”

 his tone made you want him even more. it was embarrassing how hot you got  when he was irritated. and he knew it. 

“i hate this stupid challenge” you said through his grip on your jaw. 

“do you want to be like that?”  he talked down to you with a smirk.

“we can always go back to my apartment, and work on your attitude” he said letting go of your face and grabbing the gear shift. 

you had soaked through your panties a while ago. you were excited but knew you wouldnt be filled up the way you wanted to be. 

the drive to shiggys apartment was agonizing. the sexual tension was higher now than it was on your first date. it felt like you were getting stopped at every red light, the car in front of you was always going slow. and both of you were sweating. 

he had one hand rubbing your thigh and the other on the steering wheel, except at stops when he would run it through his shaggy hair. when he finally got to his apartment complex the two of you practically sprinted inside. 

“elevator?” you asked pressing the up button repeatedly. 

he took his hands out of his pockets and said “stairs” 

the two of you raced up to the fourth floor, you beat him but just barely. once both of you were in the hallway he picked you up and slung you over his shoulder.

once in his apartment he didnt even turn the lights on, he took you to his bed and threw you on it. 

he stood over you and sighed. “its your lucky day” he then pushed you up to the headboard and pulled off your panties. so eager, you were both still wearing shoes and the window was open. 

you shivered at the cold air on your exposed heat. 

shigaraki just stared for a minute. he loved vulnerability. 

he loved having you at his mercy. 

he pushed your skirt up and grabbed onto your thighs. 

“i knew you would be soaked.” he shook his head “such a whore” he said.

and just like that he dove right in.  

he licked up your folds and you bucked your hips to meet him. 

his grip on your thighs tightened and he pushed you into the bed.

“dont move” he met your eyes when he said it.

he started sucking hickies on your inner thighs, his fingers teasing at your clit. 

you held his head in your hands, not directing him, but rubbing his scalp. 

he occasionally hummed into your thighs at the feeling. 

he pulled off of your inner thigh and brought his mouth and nose to your entrance. you whimpered, expecting him to relieve your ache. 

he blew cold air on your exposed heat. 

you cried out. 

and shigaraki crawled up to meet you at eye level. 

he straddled you and leaned down “beg.” he whispered 

“please” you whispered

“i dont get anything for this. why should i be nice if i dont get the reward of your tight little pussy? or getting to fuck your pretty face. make it worth my while. give me this one little thing.  i said to beg like the whore you are.” 

you gulped. “please tomura. i touch myself to the thought of you every day and nothing satisfies me like you do. i just want you. i want you to fill me up and please let me come. please sir.” 

“hmm okay, i guess but its embarrassing that you touch yourself so much, you really are a whore.” he said as he repositioned his mouth at your entrance. 

he once again pinned your hips to the bed and brough his mouth to your entrance.

his long slender fingers ran through your folds a few times before stopping at your clit and rubbing circles. 

you moaned in pleasure, finally. shigaraki was relieving your ache. 

he sucked on your entrance and drank your juice like it was water from the tap. you could feel his tongue at your entrance, he tease then run his tongue through your folds. 

your entire body was shaking and the knot in your stomach was about to release. 

“please i - can i please” you whined. 

shikaraki hummed yes into you, his grip on your thighs tightening 

the hum was what sent your over the edge, your walls tightening and releasing around shigarakis mouth. 

he pulled off for a moment and looked at you “that was fast. youre so easy, y/n, you know that?” 

and at that he went right back to what he was doing, only this time it was his finger. at your entrace and his tongue on your clit. 

his tongue going all around and eventually stopping and making out with your bud. 

you were crying at the pleasure. 

his long fingers going in and out, and in and out. at no particular speed or regularity and occasionally stoping to curl inside you. 

your hands went to shiggys hair, but you couldnt control yourself the way you had earlier. your hands were shaking as the held onto his head.

you came again, it was so fast you didn’t even have the time to ask.

you could feel him smiling on you.

shigaraki pinched your thigh, acknowledging your high, but showed no sign of stopping.

he maneuvered a little bit, grabbing something under the bed while still fingering you. 

if you thought you were a mess before, you were wrong. because you were even more of a mess when shigaraki started rubbing around your clit with a vibrator. 

your back arched and you grabbed onto the sheets, so as not to pull on shiggys hair, “pleASE. m-gonna c--um” you barely got out. 

your lower body convulsing. 

tears started streaming down your face, it hurt so good. “dont cum yet, baby. i want you to wait this time. like i have to wait.” 

“no-oh-oh-o” you sobbed 

shigaraki mustve been getting irritated because his grip on you tightened, and he pinched your inner thigh. 

“please” you whimpered, running your fingers through his hair as gently as you could. 

“no” he said sweetly. 

your vision was starting to blur and you were still crying, “isnt this what you wanted darling?” shigaraki asked. 

you only sobbed in response, you were loosing the ability to form coherent sentences. 

the knot in your stomach released without warning, and you came on shigaraki’s vibrator. 

with that he sighed and stood up, going to the bathroom to help you clean up. 

despite your scattered brain, you knew your boyfriend well enough to know that he was in agony. 

“does it hurt?” you asked him between deep breaths. 

refering to how bad he wanted you, and how hard he was in his pants. 

he waled back in with a towel and said “yes” looking down at the ground. 

“well what if we” you started. 

“no, im tired of having to explain this to you.”

“please, i just want you so bad” you begged as he climbed on top pf you.

“i said no! just fucking shut up” he snapped

“why?" you whinned

he found your wrists and pinned your hands beside your head on the bed. 

“everyone gets a different penalty. do you know what mine is if i fail? huh? do you want to know”

"um i-” 

you went to speak but no words came out. 

shigaraki leaned down “my penalty is to send the group chat a video of us having sex” 

“oh” you said feeling yourself blush

he gulped and looked away “which i really dont want to do because you are mine.”

he released your wrists and fell on top of you, “youre all mine” 

“please just wait 2 more weeks” he whispered into your neck. 

masterlist

[maizumis]

Hello! Can I please request — WHEN YOUR SON DOESN'T WANT TO SHARE YOU WITH THEM?

THANK YOU

— WHEN YOUR SON DOESN'T WANT TO SHARE YOU WITH THEM

ft. timeskip!miya atsumu, miya osamu, kuroo tetsuro, iwaizumi hajime, suna rintaro

note: reader referred as mom ‼️ nonnie I love this<33 I hope you like the characters I chose

❦ ATSUMU is a crybaby, for sure, he would cling at you every single hour of the day— his son kept pulling him put of you and please, baby boy was getting frustrated, he just wanted his cuddles with the live of his life “daddy! nuh! momma ‘s mine” the little boy stood between the two of you just before atsumu was going in for a peck “uh!? who do ya think ya are gremlin? a wanna kiss momma!” the child jumped to your embrace, wrapping his arms around you as a koala “momy ‘s mine! no one else's, mine.” before the petty argument escalated to something more, you decide to spoke, holding your son close to your chest while patting his head “one kiss to daddy then I'm yours, yeah?”

❦ OSAMU loved the feeling of you on his chest talking about anything you had to say, you were thinking about the future? he is all ears. you were frustrated after s bitty day at work? he was there to reassure you were the best; that's how he funded himself right now, on the couch, cuddling, not saying nothing in particular until his son came to the picture “daddy! no!” you jumped at the high pitched voice, osamu had a worried expression since he didn't knew what happened to his son “mommy is mine! why you hugging her? I can only hug her, only me” he told him keeping straight eye contact nuzzling to your chest since he knew you couldn't say no to him “brat, see who can make yer lunch for school, cause daddy is not going ta do it anymore"

❦ KUROO has been on a silence competition with his child to see who could gain more of your attention, maybe it was little family dress or memories when both of you started dating, but always, always with the intention of gaining your full love “hi kitten—” “— mommy” both of them shared nasty looks at the kitchen door, ready to see who can win this time around “if you two are here for trouble, you can get out” you were back to the dishes, knowing full well what they wanted “but mommy!” “kitten, is not fair!” maybe– no, this was the last straw “kuroo, take the apron and finish doing this– gremlin you're not out of the hook, your room better be clean by the time I come back" taking the keys to the car, you proudly left two dumbfounded boys in the middle of your kitchen “good job, good job”

❦ IWAIZUMI came home after practice with the beefy boys, ready to spend the rest of the day and the weekend with his family; he let out a sigh before announcing he was home, smiling at the sound of his son little steps coming to the front door “daddy! you can't see mommy— she ‘s mine now!” his happy face dropped, what he meant he couldn't see you? and not even a welcome kiss? “yeah, good joke bud, where's mom?” the kid only turned his head from left to right with a furious expression, how his dad dared to steal his mom from him “im telling you– you can't see her!” annoyed of the little trantrum, he picked up his son and balanced him on his arms “well buddy, I don't care, I wanna see mommy and I'm gonna see mommy and you better be fine with it”

❦ SUNA is the clingiest of them all, even if he is subtle about it, he follows you around like a lost puppy, sad to say, his son was his exact carbon copy and he wouldn't let his father have his alone time “buddy please, at least let me beside the two of you– not even with mom” he was begging at this point, touch starved in every single day “didnt you date mommy since high school? you had plenty of time, she mine now!” teasing tsumu and osamu came to his minds, how they always laughed at him for being extremely attached to you “no—” he decided to place a final point to the discussion “no more, I wanna lay with mommy, you better be okay with it, remember why you're here in the first place”

[flwrsuh]

golden boy — jake sim

/ pairing ; jake sim x implied f!reader (use of “miss” referring to the reader, but no pronouns are used !! )

summary ; golden boy jake, high school / tutor au. jake is just the most perfect human to exist and you, along with everyone else, notice that. this is also very loosely based on you belong with me by taylor swift

a/n ; hi lovelies !! im thinking about making this a series, so please send some asks / leave some comments on what you think !

if i make this a series, this would be part 1 and the rest of the chapters would be a lot longer than this !! this one is only so short to test out the idea and see how you guys like it :)

one more thing, i know this is the longest a/n ever i'm sorry, but this is dedicated to my bestie @lettertothesoul who helped me so much with this idea and it wouldn't have become a reality without you <33 thank you so much for all your help

~~ lowercase intended and not proofread !!

you had never been the smartest, always struggling in school and barely scraping by with grades one could only call acceptable. it was enough to pass year by year, so why should you try any harder? however, this year in particular was the most important to your future, your senior year, and for whatever reason, this year your grades had dropped to an all time low. failing almost every class, you were lucky if you would have the credentials to graduate on time. you were brought out of your thoughts by your teacher calling your name out.

“y/n?”

you look up from the desk you had unknowingly been staring at for the past hour. looking around the almost deserted classroom, you realize she was telling you the class period had ended. almost deserted, the only other people remaining in the room being your physics teacher, and star golden boy, jake sim.

“oh,” you manage to let out as you quickly stand to begin packing up your books, not that you used them anyway.

“miss y/n, please come speak with me.”

your face heating up feeling jake’s gaze fall onto your frame; he had never noticed you before, not that you knew of anyway, and you didn’t want the first time he actually sees you to be when you’re being scolded about nearly flunking out of school. sighing and pushing your bag onto your shoulders, you approach her desk, knowing exactly what was coming.

trying to keep her voice down as to not embarrass you in front of your totally-perfect classmate, your teacher begins, "miss y/n, i'm sure you know why i called you over. your grades as of late have been, well, unsatisfactory."

you blink up at her, unsure of what to say. of course, you knew this, but where was she going with it? just then, you feel him approaching the desk, he comes to a stop, his presence resting to your left. too afraid to look in his direction, you begin playing with your sleeves.

please god, why me? what have i done to deserve this?

"jake here has offered to tutor you in not only physics but math as well! isn't that just lovely of him?"

your eyes must be bulging out of your head, you think. this is not where you ever could've imagined this going. the jake sim, your school's perfect boy, captain of the track team, student council president, man of every person in their right mind's dreams, tutoring you... and voluntarily? you must be hallucinating.

somebody pinch me.

just then, you feel a tiny sting on your left arm, only now letting yourself glance in that direction. your gaze trails from the floor all the way up to his gleaming brown eyes that had been watching you all this time.

did i say that out loud?

you had always fantasized about the moment jake realized your existence, and this was not the way you ever could've foreseen it happening. not only was there the embarrassment of needing a tutor, but you somehow managed to make matters worse for yourself by letting your thoughts slip past your chapped lips.

your first tutoring session with him was to be held in the library during lunch the following day. you could do this, right? i mean, it can't get any worse for you than it already was, and besides, it was during school, in a public place where you could easily make a getaway if needed. yeah, you got this. maybe he would've even forgotten about your little slip up in the physics classroom by that time; he's so busy, why would he remember such minor details about you? what you never could've known, was that he remembered everything when it came to you; he had admired you the way you did him, and he was just as nervous for your meet-up.

when the time you had been dreading for the past 24 hours had finally arrived, you entered the library with sweaty palms and the deepest breath you could muster leaving your lungs. peering around the dimly lit library, you notice the stunning brunette wearing his signature golden framed glasses. he looked effortlessly beautiful, as he always managed to. finally gaining the courage to approach him, you silently pull out the chair opposite to him and take your seat. he seemed startled almost as he looks up at you; you must've been quieter than you had thought.

he flashes you his all too popular pearly white smile, "well, let's begin, shall we?"

"um, yeah, yeah, i guess so."

real smooth, y/n.

"so i was thinking we start with some basics today and eventually work up to the more difficult stuff, what do you think, y/n?"

the way your name tumbled past his lips sounds like a sweet melody. you are caught off guard, not even sure previously that he had known what your name was, thinking that you were just one of the many charity cases he picked up off the sidewalk to help with their... math? but he knew much more than your name; for months now he had picked up small bits of knowledge about you from your friends and overheard hallway conversations, and you had been the thing taking up the majority of his thoughts for so many days, besides physics, of course.

after about an hour of studying, which was more like the two of you stealing glances at each other while the other was busy reading from the many textbooks that had been spread across the table, you part ways and head off to your next classes, with the promise of another study date, i mean, session, in the nearby future.

[nott-emotionally-stable]

Professor Widogast stumbles into his classroom one particular Monday morning, silencing the murmurs of "if he's more than 15 minutes late, we're legally allowed to leave!" Well, he presumes that's what they're saying; his ears are still ringing from last night.

He gives his students a quick logical puzzle as a warm-up. However, more than a few moments later, the kids are all still gaping at him. Caleb doesn't blame them; it's not every day that your teacher comes in looking like a human punching bag. There's gashes still visible on his neck and hands, and his body is basically one big bruise. Even Caduceus’s healing paired with a long rest wasn't enough to fully restore him.

"Aright," he sighs, resigned. "Who has questions?"

Every hand in the room shoots up simultaneously. Caleb feels an amused smirk pulling at his lips- at least they're curious.

"Wonderful. Once you complete the warm-up, you may bring it up to my desk and ask one question each."

The sound of pencils scribbling across paper fills the room. The children start quietly muttering to one another, some discussing the problem, most discussing their teacher. Caleb rests his eyes for a moment. Ohhh, that feels nice.

It feels like not a moment later when his trance is broken by the sound of confident footsteps and something being placed on his desk. Without opening his eyes, he responds, "Yes, Elise?"

An assertive, yet slightly squeaky voice answers back. "How'd you get so hurt?"

"I got into a fight last night." He says matter-of-factly.

The room bursts into sounds of disbelief. "No way!" one boy exclaims, as another one shouts "I told you!" Caleb peeks his eyes open and sees a few hands exchanging some copper, as twenty students start demanding more answers out of him. Caleb allows the volume of the room to rise a little longer before trying to regain some control.

"Please calm down everyone, I do not need the other teachers angry with me. In fact, I believe Professor Biesdorf is giving an exam right now, so let's tone it down a notch."

The students are not relenting, so Caleb decides to remind them of the rules. "I am not answering another question until there is another paper on my desk."

It helps a little. Some kids are too busy staring at him in awe to continue. They all must have assumed he slipped on some ice or tripped over one of his cats. These students are too young to have been taught of any of his exploits, so to them, he's just a stuffy professor who spends too much time in the library.

Another paper gets tossed onto his desk. "What did you fight," a boy named Otto demands. He's trying to act unfazed, but there's excitement sparkling in his eyes.

Caleb pauses for a moment for dramatic effect. "Someone I used to call a friend." Gasps echo around the room.

Not much longer, another paper is slammed in front of him. “Did you kill him?”

Caleb grins, “Ohhh, no. She’s much too clever for that.”

Soon enough, there’s a steady stream of worksheets being scattered around him, as his students congregate excitedly on the other side of his desk.

“Did you win, though?”

“Hmmm… I would say no.” Caleb squints his eyes faux-menacingly. “But you better not tell her that.”

“Who is she?”

“For security reasons, I cannot give her name out.” An uncontrollable smile fills Caleb’s face. “However, in this room only, we may refer to her as Fiona Fancypants.”

“Fiona Fancypants?” One girl manages to say through her giggling.

“Yes,” Caleb says with wide eyes. “And you better not underestimate her.”

“Why? What can she do?”

“She is not a sorcerer, and yet, she can create magic without a god, without music, and without a spellbook.”

“But isn’t that supposed to be impossible?”

“It is, yes.” (A/N: don’t come at me if i’m wrong, im dumb and its 2am)

“What kind of magic can she do?”

“I’ve seen her send large beasts to another plane of existence. I’ve seen her glue together petrified people and then bring them back to life. I've seen her deceive an ancient hag with nothing other than her own cunning and a moldy blueberry cupcake.”

“Are you in love with her?”

Now it’s Caleb’s turn to laugh in surprise. “No, but I do love her.”

“Then why did you fight her?”

“She betrayed me.”

“What did she do?”

“Yes, what did she do?” a deeper voice asks from the doorway. All the kids spin around to identify the unknown voice. There stands a dark elven man with curly black hair that sits at his shoulders. In his left hand he is carrying a brown paper bag. Caleb mentally kicks himself. Since he used up all his spell slots last night, he slept at the Blooming Grove with the rest of the Nein, and then he teleported right to the Academy in the morning. Which means he forgot to pick up his lunch from home.

“Everyone, I’d like you to meet… Ussek.”

Essek, who has started making his way (🎵making his way🎵) through the classroom, momentarily freezes in bemusement. “Ah, yes. My name is... Ussek. It’s very nice to meet all of you. I’m sorry to interrupt, but even the smartest teacher in the world forgets things sometimes.” Essek places the paper bag on Caleb’s desk, next to the cluttered mix of papers. He picks one up and studies it with a serious expression before turning it around, revealing it to be nothing more than a series of scribbles. “Hard at work, I see,” he says in the driest of voices.

“Yes, well thank you for the reminder. We were all just getting back to our seats.” Caleb gives his class a pointed look. The kids all groan as they return to their spots. They watch closely as the two men turn away from them, speaking in hushed voices.

“So what did Fiona do?” Essek teases with a quirk of the eyebrow.

“... It was a complicated-”

“She challenged your word in Scrabble again?”

“Yes! Every time we play!”

“And you responded by attacking her?” Essek asks dubiously.

“What do you think?” Caleb retorts.

“That she attacked you?”

“Ah, at first it was just Thaumaturgy, but then it… escalated.”

“Well, do not worry. Next week, I’ll be there to protect you.”

Caleb looks at the ceiling and sighs, a smile dancing on his face. “I am going to ignore the insinuation there, and just say that everyone missed you at family dinner.”

Essek mirrors his boyfriend’s easy smile. “Of course they did. I do float, after all. Now, you better return to your students before they figure out my identity and rat me out to the Bright Queen.”

And Caleb most certainly does not blush, because there is no way his super hot boyfriend just made him forget that he’s supposed to be in the middle of a lesson.

Essek holds Caleb’s gaze as he does a quick series of hand motions and vanishes. Caleb just rolls his eyes as he turns back to his class, because he knows Essek just Dimension Door-ed into the hallway to impress the kids.

And it worked. The entire class has their mouths agape once again. Except for one terrified-looking child in the back of the room, who has his hand up.

“Yes Charlie?”

“Is Fiona Fancypants still looking for you?”

Schiesse. It was not Caleb’s intention to traumatize any children, so he shakes his head and responds, “Do not worry, she is on a boat right now on the other side of the world. She has no idea where I am.”

And indeed, Jester is sitting on the deck of The Nein Heroez on the other side of the world. However, at this moment, she is giggling through her scry spell as she’s describing all of this to her own boyfriend. (“He looks sooooo fucked up right now, Fjord, you have no idea.”)