#please let me know how is the quality of your print

[golswia]

Hello guys!

Little announcement

I have opened a print shop ✨

Check it out if you are interested! I'll be slowly adding more arts, but if you have specific one you want to order, feel free to send me a message!

As always, I'm very grateful for your support 🧡

(and if you don't want to buy a print, but still would like to help me out, you can tip me on ko-fi!)

[mountainficss]

STAWPPP 🦈 ANON HERE .. THE FIC WAS TOO GOOD😭😭😭 DAMN U KNOW HOW TO WRITE. anyways im back for more cuz omggg I SAW THIS LIKE REALLY WOWOWOW PHOTO OF WONWOO like w/ his hair wet and stuff and GWOWODODOD DAMN (https://pin.it/3hCKDB7wu) just thinking abt how shower sex with wonwoo would be, ugh thanks again 4 answering, I always get so anxious writing these !! ^_^

!! mentions of: shower sex, unprotected sex, fingering

OH MY??? jeon wonwoo…ugh he’s so pretty…

ALSO I MISSED U 🦈 ANON I’M SO GLAD YOU LIKED THE JOSHUA FIC <333 i’m so sorry i take forever to respond these days. these professors must really want me to stay busy with all this work they’re giving smh. ALSO PLEASE DON’T BE ANXIOUS I LOVE HEARING FROM YOU ALL <333

omg shower sex with wonwoo would be so sweet. after a long day it’s what both of you would need. maybe work is rough on the both of you or you just want to spend some quality time together. either way shower sex is the perfect way to wind down! he’d slide in the shower with you, the water soaking his hair and causing little droplets to run down his pretty face. would pull your body to his chest and press sweet little kisses to your neck from behind, licking and sucking on the skin lovingly <3 he’d stick two fingers inside your heat, fucking you slowly and stretching you out so you can take him better ;( no matter what wonwoo always takes the time to prep you, he never wants it to be painful for you (and i just know he’s got that dumb dick so it’s gonna hurt more if he doesn’t prep—). he’d pull his fingers out, licking them clean as he guides his length to your hole. he’d push in slowly, one hand gripping your hip while the other snakes around to knead your chest. and while you adjust to the stretch he’d be whispering the sweetest praises in your ear about how you look so pretty for him and how his cock was made for only you </3 the steam from the shower and the feeling of wonwoo filling you up so well would make you lightheaded, already feeling cock-drunk despite him barely even fucking you ;( he’d thrust gently at first, checking constantly to make sure he wasn’t hurting you. you’d have to practically beg him to go faster because he’s always so worried about you </3 but then his thrusts would gradually speed up, the sound of skin colliding and the shower running echoing through the bathroom. he’d let out the lewdest whines and whimpers next to your ear, licking up your neck and pressing a small kiss to your jawline. he’d pull your body as close as physically possible and wrap his arms around your torso, your back pressed against his chest so closely you can feel his heart hammering ;( you’d push your hands against the foggy glass to steady yourself, leaving smudged hand prints as wonwoo drills into you. it wouldn’t take you long to finish with how desperately he was fucking you, the sound of wet skin and wonwoo’s sweet moans sending you over the edge. he’d reach a hand down to rub circles on your clit as you cum, feeling you jolt against him. he’d cum inside you as your walls tighten around him, continuing to rub your clit through his orgasm </3 his moans would be so pretty as he fucks his cum deep into your hole. your legs would wobble, feeling weak as you both struggle to catch your breath in the steamy shower. he’d be panting as he pulls out, reaching two fingers down to your hole to fuck his cum back inside ;(

you’d both be so tired but wonwoo would still take the time to clean you up, lathering your hair in shampoo and gently massaging it into your scalp. you’d lean against him, your eyes fluttering closed as you feel wonwoo’s fingers in your hair and listen to the sound of the warm water raining down on the both of you </3333 god i love wonwoo so much

[ghostlygraphist]

ai generated mushroom guides could get people killed

'i'm not going to link any of them here, for a variety of reasons, but please be aware of what is probably the deadliest AI scam i've ever heard of: plant and fungi foraging guide books. the authors are invented, their credentials are invented, and their species IDs will kill you"

"update: i keep getting annoyed that the QTs are like "if this is true, it's horrifying" ..but you're right, you don't know me from a hole in the ground and you SHOULD worry about the veracity of anything you find online."

thread source

so i went looking

the full description:

How to quickly become a confident mushroom forager without fear of misidentifying poisonous lookalikes!

Have you dreamt about becoming more self-sufficient and sourcing your own fresh, local ingredients?

Do you want to start sustainably foraging so you can become healthier and happier?

Have you thought about harvesting wild mushrooms but afraid you won’t be able to tell the edible and poisonous species apart?

Then this book is for you!

Save money and enjoy the delicacies that nature has to offer. Mushroom hunting is easier than you think, and less dangerous than everyone assumes.

Wild plant foraging is increasing in popularity with celebrity chefs and small cafes jumping on the bandwagon and using locally foraged produce in their food.

There are so many benefits of foraging to your health (physical and mental) and even the environment!

In Fearless Foraging in the Rocky Mountains, you’ll discover:

Over 40 species of mushroom you can harvest all year round

Complimentary access to the mobile-friendly Digital Field Guide that includes high-resolution photos and descriptions of all edible mushrooms and any toxic lookalikes so you don’t have to worry about misidentifying species

How to correctly create (and use) spore prints to help you figure out what’s what

An annual mushroom calendar so you can keep track of the mushrooms by season and make the most of each foraging season

Detailed descriptions of the anatomical properties of fungi - gain the essential knowledge you need to correctly identify species

Tips on sustainable foraging - and ways to increase the natural mushroom count for next time you visit!

And much more!

Foraging is a tradition upheld for centuries by indigenous people who used ancient, respectful principles to live off the land. Connect with that history by embracing the artful skills and knowledge to confidently collect food for your meals.

Even if you're still worried about toxic mushrooms, let this guide reassure you. Included are incredibly high-level descriptions and details to use so you don’t get it wrong. NOTE: To keep it economically prices, our paperback version is printed in black and white. Premium color is available in our hardcover version. Both will provide the quality necessary to identify wild mushrooms and plants and both come with access to the full color, high-resolution Digital Field Guide.

If you want to learn the skillful art of foraging mushrooms and enjoy nature's nutritious bounties then scroll up and click the “Add to Cart” button now.

end description

wild harvest publications... no named author? i n t e r e s t i n g

"To keep it economically prices" hmm *the design is very human meme*

this book that promises highly detailed descriptions doesn't even have color images unless you pay a premium

"Mushroom hunting is easier than you think, and less dangerous than everyone assumes." hmm. hmmmmm. yeah the government definitely put out those 'if you don't know what it is don't put it in your mouth' PSAs for no reason

tldr don't buy foraging guides off amazon if you can't locate a human author and verify their credentials yourself

[xoxomoonlightxoxo]

The Girl That Disappeared | Suspect #2 JJK

⇠ 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐯. | 𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐱 | 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 ⇢  

✧ Synopsis: It was a gloomy Friday evening when you felt the mists of melancholy pulse through your veins, aching body floating above the deep water. Squeezing your eyes shut, your lips trembled with fear. You didn’t want to die, but you sure as hell didn’t want to live. Not in this town. Not with the people in it. So, why don’t you just disappear? Leave them to search for the remnants of who you had been before you realised that life is more painful than death. Park Jimin. Kim Taehyung. Jeon Jungkook. Best-friend, step-brother, and an ex-lover. Although their paths had never crossed before that gloomy Friday evening, their names, printed in bold, now remained on the top of the suspect list. Stories entangled in your mystery.

✧ w/c: 6.1k ✧ a/n: a lot is going on here but please let me know what you think, mwuah 💓 ✧ taglist: @kookieandjoonberries @whoa-jo @taevestr @smoljimjim @kookxin

@11thenightwemet11 @xumyboo @kingofbodyrolls @jksusawife

“Y/n-ah! I’m leaving, please turn on the security,” your mother’s voice echoed from the entrance as you heard the front door close. She was working on-call today, and while it seemed like you finally had an opportunity to spend some quality time together, the hospital rang her in for an emergency operation at the last minute. 

“Okay, love you,” you yelled from your room, picking up the laundry off the floor before heading downstairs. No one was home. Mr. Kim had a night shift and wouldn’t be back until later and only God knew where Taehyung was. 

Scrolling through your phone, you smiled at the photos Jimin sent you from his parent’s ranch house. It’s been a week since he left, and you couldn’t help but miss him. The two of you haven’t gone this long without seeing each other, so it felt weird not being able to call him over. 

“Y/n, it’s so nice here, you would’ve loved it,” he smiled through the phone, resting his head on the soft pillow. 

“I bet,” you whined. 

“Next time, you’re coming with me, okay? There’s this waterfall I’ve been dying to show you,” 

“Okay … I missed you Jimin-ah,” your voice broke, glossy eyes looking down at the teddy bear he got for your birthday. 

“Y/n-ie, you know I missed you more,” Jimin moved in closer, placing a kiss on his front camera as you glanced up.

“Now, get some sleep, I’ll talk to you tomorrow, mmhm,”

“Goodnight,” you whispered with a little wave. 

“Sleep tight, angel,” 

He never called after that. All your attempts went straight to voicemail. It was strange, Jimin always valued communication, and never was the type to let you wonder about his whereabouts. Kept you posted even with a little “k”, just to signify that he got the message. But, now, it felt like he was gone. Vanished into thin air, like nothing happened. And, it killed you knowing that you couldn’t do anything about it. 

The clock read 7 am on the dot, which meant that you still had about two hours till the first bell. It was the first day of your period and your cramps were horrendous, to say the least. They’re usually a pain in the ass but never this bad. Looking through the medicine cabinet you rummaged past the bandaids and the gummy vitamins before remembering that Taehyung took the last Ibuprofen for his headache last night. It was ironic how little painkillers you had in the house, knowing that your mom was a doctor. But, it’s because she always preached the importance of letting your body heal naturally. Science could only get you so far, I guess? 

Zipping up your windbreaker, you grabbed your wallet and keys before heading outside to the local grocery store until the sound of a slammed door left you frozen in your tracks. It came from upstairs. Looking up at the dark corridor you turned on the lights, following the breeze seeping through the cracks of your room. 

“Taehyung?” you called, hands hovering over the doorknob. No one answered. Why would they? You were the only one in the house, right? 

“Taehyung, if this is one your stupid jok-” you whispered again before facing the empty room. 

No sight of Taehyung, but your window was open, which explained the door. The only problem was that you didn’t remember opening it in the first place. Nonetheless, you would gladly accept this version of the incident over the possibility of some paranormal activity. One problem at a time, please. 

So, you shut your blinds and went back downstairs to turn off the security system before grabbing your bike from the garage. You didn't have a licence, and only got your learners about a month ago, so if no one was home you had to resort to another form of transportation. 

You didn’t mind biking though. Found it rather therapeutic. Loved the alone time it allowed for without the bombardment of life and its constant obstacles. Just you and your thoughts. And, although there was a bit of a fog, it was clear enough to see where you were going. So, you buckled your helmet and went off on your journey to secure some Ibuprofen. 

Exiting the gated community, you biked through the local primary school, passing by a parking lot of sleep-deprived parents rushing to work after dropping off their little ones. It was getting a bit chilly as the wind picked up, so you stopped to put on some mittens and a hat before glancing back at the rustling sound behind the corner. 

“Hello?” 

Again, no one answered. But, that didn’t stop the chills running down your spine, remembering the incident earlier at home. Looking down at your watch, you gasped at the 20 minutes that had already passed, yet, you were nowhere near the grocery store. So, it was time to focus. 

Biking down the empty road, your eyes were scattered across the painted scenery. The old brick houses and the tall trees. The rusted mailboxes and the garden gnomes. It all felt so nostalgic. So close to your heart, as if tethered by the strings of your past. But, the feeling was short-lived. Consumed by the eerie melancholy inching up your skin as you felt someone's presence behind you. 

This time, you weren’t wrong. Covered from head to toe, it looked like a man. Keeping a civil distance, he followed your turns. Left. Right. Straight. Right. Left. Straight. Coincidence or not, this wasn’t a common path that people took. Not many knew of the shortcut. So, you began to speed up, feeling the adrenaline kick in once he did the same. Now, it was a chase. 

Pushing through the burning pain in your calves you picked up the pace, feet firm on the pedals. He didn't pity your fatigue, only fueled it more by inching closer before the two of you were riding side-by-side. Keeping an eye on his uncanny demeanour, you flinched at the sound of a car horn blast through your trembling state as a white Honda glared past you, pointing at the stop sign. 

“I'm sorry,” you whispered under your breath. 

“You're fast,” the man scoffed, tilting his head with a sly grin. That's all you could see. 

“Who are you?” you yelled, voice trembling in panic. 

“I’ll give you a head start, mmhm?” he sneered, changing the gears on his bike. 

Feeling the tightness in your throat, you were gasping for air, dilated pupils scanning the surroundings for help. Unfortunately, as if praying on your downfall, the street was empty. Not a soul in sight. So, you pressed on the pedals, leaving the man in the dust as you prayed that the next turn led to people. 

Gas station. Bingo. 

Hoping off your bike you bolted towards the door. 

“Hey, hey, hey,” the cashier yelled out, furrowed gaze searching the panic on your face. You could feel the flush rise up your cheeks, but the absence of Mr. X occupied your mind. 

“I’m so sorry,” you mouthed, clearly out of breath before dialling Jimin’s phone number. It was like second nature. You didn’t even realise it until your call went straight to voicemail. 

“Oh, right,” a sigh escaped your lips, remembering that he was still MIA.

Looking through your contacts, there was only one more person you could call. But, the possibility of them actually agreeing to help you was as slim as your waist after all that exercise. Nonetheless, you took a deep breath and pressed the call button. 

“Taehyung?” 

“What do you want, y/n?” he scoffed. 

“Right. So, potentially … if you could … would you mind picking me up from the gas station near River Banks?” you whispered, careful with every word as you anticipated his response. 

“Potentially, screw you. What the fuck did you lose there?” 

“It’s kind of a long story but I do need to be at school in about half an hour,” 

“Can I even say no?”

“Last time I checked it was a free country but a dangerous one at that. So, if I'm kidnapped, my blood is on your hands,” 

“You and that victim mentally of yours go way back, huh?” 

“Please, Taehyung. I’ve never asked you for a favour before,” 

“Fine, give me 10 minutes,” he sighed, ending the call before you could even thank the guy. 

The car ride home was quiet. No radio. Windows rolled up. Silence. 

“So, you’re really not gonna tell me?” Taehyung asked with an arched brow, glancing at your stiff form as the light turned red. 

You’ve never been good at lying. Even if your mouth stayed shut, your face would’ve revealed it all. Essentially, there was no running away from the truth in your case. 

“Well … no one was home and I needed medicine so I decided to bike to the grocery store,” you began explaining, avoiding his eyes. 

“Mmhm,”

“And then …” you paused, hesitating the next part. What if Mr. Kim finds out? What if you were blowing this out of proportion? 

“Y/n. You’re making me angry. Just say it,” he scolded, pressing on the pedal. 

“Sorry. Um, so yeah … I was biking and then out of nowhere this man started following me. So, I tried losing him by taking different turns but … ended up getting lost,” 

“You were followed?” there was a slight change in Taehyung’s voice. Less sarcastic, more intrigued. 

“I guess?” 

“Well, did you see what he looked like?” 

“Not, really. He was covered from head to toe. Except …” you gasped, eyes shut as your brain scavenged through its short-term memory, recalling the moment at the stop sign. 

“Yes?” 

“The side of his mouth was … bruised like he got punched or something?” you leaned back into the seat, fidgeting with your rings while Taehyung merged onto the right lane. He was too focused on the road to hear what you said, but as you glanced at his face your eyes widened, spotting the same purple marks. 

“What?” he growled, furrowed gaze glaring back at your parted lips. 

“Nothing.” you chuckled awkwardly, reaching for the radio before his cold hand touched yours. 

“Look me dead in the eyes and tell me.” he sneered, interlocking his fingers with yours. You’ve known each other for almost a year, yet, your shoulders have never even grazed past each other. So, this was strange, to say the least. 

“Tell you what?” you said hushly, gulping down the nerves as he levelled his face to meet your scattering eyes. 

“That you’re scared,” 

“I’m not,” you scoffed, feeling the flush in your cheeks. 

“Good. Because why the fuck would it be me, you dumbass.” his voice got louder with each word, throwing your hand back before rolling down the windows. Finally. Some fresh air. 

Why would it be him, y/n? You weren’t his favourite but, this was too much. Taehyung was a straightforward person, if he hated you he would say it to your face. So, these mind games were really not his thing. But, then again, what’s up with the bruised lip? 

Fixing your uniform you walked into the brightly lit classroom. First period. Physics. No one was in their seats, let alone bothered by the fact that the teacher was almost 10 minutes late. Placing your books on the desk you looked over at the empty seat beside you. Jimin was still gone. No one has heard from him in weeks. 

Bing Bing

Rampaging through your backpack you searched for your phone. You didn’t have time to properly pack because Taehyung was counting down the minutes before he threatened to drive off, so you just threw everything in hoping to fix it during your free period. Scrolling through the notifications your eyes focused on the text message from an unknown number. 

“I missed you.” you mouthed under your breath.

“Sorry everyone, the meeting took a bit longer,” Mr. Choi chuckled softly, speed-walking into the room before ushering everyone to their seats. 

“I missed you?” you whispered again, eyebrows knitted with confusion. Was it Jimin? Did he change his number? 

“Nonetheless, I am pleased to introduce our new transfer student …” 

You couldn’t recognize the area code, so you tried looking it up on the internet but found nothing useful. Was this some kind of a scam? An innocent prank, maybe? 

“Jeon Jungkook” Mr. Choi’s voice suddenly echoed in your ears making you glance up at the dark-haired boy standing in front of the class. Interestingly, he was already looking at you. Hooded gaze focused on the way your demeanour changed completely. 

“Jungkook, feel free to take any empty seat,” 

Bowing to the man, he did exactly that. Slowly passing by the first three rows before stopping by the seat next to you. Nodding his head, he seemed pleased with the pick. 

“Oh, no sorry, Jungkook-ah, that seat belongs to another student,” Mr. Choi called out with a smile that quickly faded as he watched him sit regardless. 

“There’s plenty of options. I’m sure they’ll find another one,” Jungkook muttered with a sly grin, taking out his books before turning his attention to your widened eyes. 

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, y/n,” he rasped against your hair, gently tucking it behind your ear to fix the back of your collar. His dark orbs flickered down to your parted lips, sending shivers down your spine.

The first kiss you shared with Jungkook was between your eyes. The way his furrowed gaze softened upon seeing you walk down the wooden stairs of your childhood home, in the lavender dress he bought for your birthday. The way he nervously nibbled on his lip ring before caressing the back of your hand, fingers intertwined with yours. Everything about him was gentle when it came to you. The way his warm embrace moulded into yours, as you grew to share the same breath, the same heartbeat. One singularity in the form of two lovers. 

He filled the void your father left as you failed to please his expectations. The ones only a son could bear. The nights you spent crying in your room, wishing that your mother didn’t have to suffer the humiliation of raising a daughter, Jungkook was there. Like a knight in shining armour, he always saved you. Hoped to give you the future you deserve if you promised to share it with him. The two of you were inseparable. Attached by the hip. 

Until, one day, you weren’t. 

It’s been a week since Jungkook transferred schools. His seat still next to you. Inches away from the past that tethered your souls. You didn’t talk much. Mentally exhausted from the consequences. But, his eyes. They never lied. Sneaking glimpses across the room, watching your every move. He wanted you to give in, to tell him why you left. Help him understand how someone so close could betray his trust, his loyalty, his love. Jungkook didn’t hate you, wouldn’t let anyone get too close, but he was hurt. You could see it in his eyes. The same eyes that onces sparkled under the shimmering lights of the night sky when you shared your first kiss.

Dipping your feet into the pool you wanted to test the water before running through the new drill your coach crafted for the upcoming swim meet. To put it lightly, it was freezing. Goosebumps all over your skin, nipples cut through glass type of freezing. You would think a school with such a budget could afford a heated pool but beggars can’t be choosers. So, you tucked your hair under the swim camp and started on some stretches. 

“One … two … three …” you breathed out, counting the reps before glancing up at the flickering lights. School ended about an hour ago, so the place was pretty empty except for the janitors and a few teachers who stayed back to work on some grading. There was no practice today, but you had a spare key to the pool, so it was just you and the water. 

“Hello?” you called out, covering yourself with the towel. No response. 

“Sorry, this is a closed practice,” you shouted out again, hearing footsteps coming from the changing rooms. 

“Hel-” 

The lights went out. Goosebumps covered your skin, heart beat through the roof. Now what? 

“This isn't funny. Turn the lights back on!”

No one answered, but the footsteps inched closer. You could sense that they were near but it was too dark to make out a figure. Then, he chuckled. Subtle but devious chuckle. Like it was all premeditated. 

“Where is it?” a voice echoed, bouncing off the four walls. It was familiar. 

“Jungkook? Is that you?” you gasped, looking over your shoulder, hands trembling in fear.  

“Where is it, y/n?” his tone was firm. 

“Where's what?” 

“Don't act dumb, love,” he sneered, hands hovering over your waist making you flinch at the sudden feeling. The smell of his vanilla musk lingered in the air as you matched each other’s breathing, skin to skin. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you whispered, chest heaving up from the tension. 

“Where’s my baby?” he rasped against your ear pushing your frail body into the water as his hold around your waist tightened. Eyes squeezed shut, you began to kick him off of you. But he was stronger, assertive, more needy. Gasping for air you felt the water seep into your lungs, nails digging into his skin as a warning to bring you back to the surface.  

However, once you were up, he would have more questions. Questions you didn’t have the heart to answer. But, Jungkook deserved to know the truth, even if it hurt. Because, deep down, your father’s abuse wasn’t the only reason you left. 

You didn’t remember much of that night thanks to the five whiskey shots that pulsed through your veins. Intoxicated your system till you became numb. Unaware of the dangers around you and vulnerable to those with bad intentions. Until it was too late. 

“Stop … please …” you whimpered, flinching at the feeling of his tongue on your breast. Parted lips leaving a trail of wet kisses down your stomach, wrists red from his tight hold as your arms stayed pinned over your head. But your cries for help were as worthless as the consent he never got. 

Until the door slammed open and Jungkook’s irate gaze saw your lifeless body buried under the weight of another man. No amount of restraint could hold him back. He was flammed with rage. 

“Y/n!” Jungkook growled, pushing the guy onto the floor as blood covered his fist. And, as the four walls caved in, your world fell apart. 

But, you could barely open your eyes, let alone get up. Too ashamed to move anyways and the migraine only made it worse. Searching for your top your heart ached with pain once you saw Jungkook’s hollow orbs swelled with tears as he wiped the blood off his face. He looked defeated, almost as unconscious as the man on the floor. Stepping over the body with one hand on his side he whimpered, biting down the pain in his ribs before covering you with his jacket. 

“We have to go.” he muttered, picking you up bridal style. 

“Koo, we can’t just leave him,” you yelled out, worried gaze searching his pale face. 

“It’s nothing fatal, he’ll be fine,” Jungkook scoffed, feeling the tightness in his throat as he glanced down at your saddened eyes.

Tension consumed the air. It was suffocating. 

“Jungkook, please slow down.” you exclaimed, tightening your hold on the seatbelt. And, although his glare was focused on the road, he couldn’t hear you. Too occupied by the burning pit in his stomach. It didn’t take long until the dashboard flashed warning signals as his speed reached 200 km/h. You were virtually flying. Yet, there was no end to his high. 

Reaching for his cold hand you tried to snap him out of it before the car suddenly stopped. 

“Oh, shit!” Jungkook yelled out, protecting you from the impact, as your body swung forward. 

Eyes squeezed shut, your hands trembled in fear. He hit someone. You hit someone. Fidgeting with your seatbelt you desperately tried to get out and help the crouched man on the ground. He wasn’t bleeding but his skin looked burnt. 

“Y/n!” Jungkook jerked you back, tightening his hold on your arm as he pressed on the pedal. 

“What are you doing? We have to go back!” you yelled with a furrowed gaze. 

“Jungkook!” you threw a few hits at his chest, reaching for the steering wheel as the car swerved along the bumpy road. 

“Enough!”

You couldn’t recognize him. He never raised his voice at you. Barely ever argued. But, now, Jungkook felt so distant. So cold. 

“Fine.” you whispered, digging your nails into your palms. It felt like a nightmare that you couldn’t wake up from. Stuck in a maze of despair, robbed of peace and the possibility that it was all in your head. That none of it was real. 

But it was. And, it would only get worse. 

Unlocking his front door, Jungkook stepped aside, letting you go first, hesitant with his touch. Furrowed gaze fixated on the ground, his head hung low, heavy with thoughts. Tucking onto the ankle straps of your heels you hissed out of frustration, vision blurring in and out of focus. 

“I can do it myself.” you scoffed, as he bent down to help. You didn’t mean to sound rude but there’s only so much one can endure before the sun sets. It was exhausting. 

“I know you can but let me,” he muttered softly.

And, for a moment there was silence. No words were exchanged. No one knew what to say. Feared that something else would go wrong. But your eyes, they were screaming. 

“Koo?” you whispered, caressing his cheek as he inched closer, burying his face into the warmth of your palm. 

“Y/n, I’m so sorry,” Jungkook blurted, gripping your dress. 

You weren’t his first love but you were his first love. And, he promised to always keep you safe, fight for the beating of your heart until the air was stripped away from his lungs. But, he failed. 

“I’m sorry for letting you get hurt” his voice was quiet, shaky. Glossy eyes looking up at your trembling lips. 

“Baby, you saved me.” you exclaimed softly, pulling him into your embrace, feeling the tension in his body slowly dissipate. 

“Nothing happened, right?” he whispered into your skin. 

“Nothing,” you said hushly. 

“Promise?” 

“Promise.” 

To be honest, you didn’t remember what happened. Only the scars remained witness, your body painted like a canvas with purple hues of abuse. But, nothing happened, right? 

“How do you know about the baby?” you questioned with an arched brow, trying your best to stay afloat as Jungkook inched closer. 

“Oh, y/n, you always underestimated the power of a small town. News here spreads faster than wildfire.” he grinned, resting his hands on your waist before your back hit the concrete. 

That night, when you layed on his chest and listened to his heartbeat, the puzzle pieces began to come together. Something did happen. Something that didn’t belong to Jungkook. You were raped and on very thin ice with your father who was ready to kick you out of the house if you didn’t oblige his threats. The ones that entailed getting rid of the baby, and clearing up the family name. But, you couldn’t bear to lose someone so close, so innocent. 

So, you didn’t. You hid the pregnancy from everyone. Of course, your mom knew but you didn’t want to risk getting her into trouble with your father, whose behaviour worsened with each fight. Completely unhinged, he couldn’t be stopped.

But, when he slammed you against the kitchen cabinet while you stood in front of your mother’s trembling body you finally felt it. The striking pain in your abdomen that travelled up your pelvis and into your back. The pooling of blood that rolled down your leg, marking your clothes with the loss of your baby. And every day since then, you wondered. Wondered what life would feel like without the constant longing to be whole again. 

“And, hey, thanks for this,” Jungkook teased with a sly wink, parading the dove necklace Mr. Kim gifted you for your graduation. 

“Give it back Jungkook, this isn’t funny.” you snapped, reaching for his hand before his hold on your waist tightened, pulling you in. 

“You stole something from me, now it’s my turn,” he rasped against your ear, nibbling on the soft skin. Inches apart, his heavy gaze flickered down to your lips. 

“Hmm, I haven’t swam in a while but I think I can make the team, right captain?” Jungkook glanced up, searching your furrowed expression. 

Unfortunately, he did make the team. If you couldn’t tell already, he was a crowd favourite. Always managed to get what he wanted, even with minimal effort. Simply put, life just seemed to work out for Jungkook. 

So, when the team went on to win the Nationals your coach decided to splurge and take everyone out for the weekend. Nothing special. Just a trip to the next town over. He rented a bus, but if you had a ride you could just meet everyone there. Sadly, both your mom and Mr. Kim were busy with work and Taehyung closed the door on you when you asked, so that seemed like a hard pass.

“Damn, Mr. Lim couldn't wait till sunrise?” your friend teased as the two of you waited by the school entrance. It was just shy of 7 am, but the sky was grey and foggy. 

“That's what I'm saying. I couldn't even sleep yesterday,” you scoffed, feeling the puffiness around your eyes. Something about the little getaway fueled your nervous system to stay alert the whole night. Was it excitement? Fear?Anxiousness? Only time will tell. 

“It's fine, in about 5 minutes we should already be hitting the road. And, hey, I brought the book you asked for,” she exclaimed, digging through her bag. 

“Nice! Fair warning though, I will be taking my beauty slumber as soon as we get on or else I might just die,” the two of you chuckled before collecting your stuff noticing the bus turn into the school parking lot. 

Heading up the stairs you were welcomed by an older gentleman. 

“Hel-” his words were cut off by the shouting outside. 

“Y/n!” 

“Sorry, could you excuse me for a second?” you giggled awkwardly, turning back to see who was making all that noise.

“Y/n, get in. I'll drive.” Jungkook urged with no hesitation, patting the passenger seat. 

“That's not necessary,” you scoffed, arms crossed over your chest. 

“That wasn't a question.” a sly grin covered his face. 

Parking his Mercedes in front of the bus, you looked back at the old man who was busy checking in the other students to notice Jungkook’s stubborn act. Well, shit. 

“Fine.” you muttered, ushering him to open the trunk.

As promised, you fell asleep almost immediately, suppressing the daunting feeling inside your chest. Jungkook didn’t mind, and kept as quiet as possible, reclining your seat before covering you with his jacket. It was better that the two of you didn’t speak. This gave him the perfect opportunity to look at you without being threatened. 

The drive was supposedly only 4 hours, but the rain lengthened the process. 

“Hhmm?” you flinched from the sound of hail hitting the glass window. 

“Sleep well?” Jungkook whispered, glancing at your drowsy eyes. 

“Yeah,” you muttered, stretching your back. 

“Are you hungry? We will have to stop at a motel, it’s too dangerous to drive.” 

“Alright. Let me just text Yuri then,” you said, unzipping your bag. 

“No need, I already let Mr. Lim know,” he winked, pulling into the parking lot. 

Mother Nature was pissed and decided to take it out on all of us. So, it wasn’t long until the two of you were drenched from head to toe. 

“Quickly, let’s go!” Jungkook exclaimed, grabbing your hand before locking the car. 

The place wasn’t brand new, per se, but it served its purpose. As soon as you walked in, you were welcomed by what could only be described as a parade of taxidermy deer heads mounted onto the wall with a complimentary coffee station by the corner. 

“I'll be right with you!” a female voice echoed from the back room. 

Glancing at the water dripping down your face Jungkook chuckled, pulling you in to wipe the excess with his sleeve. 

“You okay?” he hummed, levelling his head until your eyes met. 

“Cold,” you muttered, nibbling on your lip before turning him back towards the front desk. 

“Right, so sorry for the wait. What can I do for you, dear?” an older woman exclaimed with a soft smile. 

“Oh, no worries at all! We’re just looking for a room for the night,” Jungkook explained, pulling out his wallet. 

“Of course! Are you two a couple by any chance?” she giggled, dimples popping out on both cheeks as your mouth dropped. 

“Oh, n-” you scoffed before his glare pierced through you. 

“Shhh, let her finish, love,” 

“Well, it’s just that Saturdays are usually our couple specials. You get a 30% discount!” she clapped, admiring what you assumed she thought to be the epitome of young love standing in front of her. 

“Lucky us, then,” Jungkook clapped as well, inching your stiff body closer to make it more believable.

“Go us!” you smiled awkwardly, patting his chest before whispering something in his ear. Don’t get too excited. 

Placing a gentle peck on your forehead he grabbed the bags, following the sweet lady towards your room. 

“Alrighty, here it is! If you need anything I’m just a call away.” 

“Thank you!” the two of you said in unison, unlocking the door. 

One bed. 

“So, how is it?” Jungkook asked, laying out his jacket on the cabinet to dry. 

“You’re sleeping on the floor.” a teasing chuckle escaped your parted lips. 

“The rain will stop soon. I doubt we’ll even need the bed,” he said, running his fingers through his hair. 

“What? We wasted all that money for nothing?”  

“Well, first of all, I paid. And, we got a discount, remember?” 

“I'm sorry. I'll pay you back,” your gaze lowered from the sudden guilt, fingers fidgeting with your rings. 

“Are you kidding? I would pay triple to spend more time with you,” his tone was genuine, pupils dilated at your timid state. 

“Jungkook,” you whispered. 

“If only you knew how much I missed it,” he tilted his head back on the wall, nibbling on his lip ring. 

“What?” 

“Hearing you say my name,”

“I thought we hated each other,” you muttered, folding your hands over your chest.

“You did. I just loved the thrill of it,” 

You would be lying if you said that you didn’t miss it too. In hindsight, your feelings were always suppressed but obvious to the naked eye. To his eyes. However, just because you miss something, doesn’t mean you have to go back. Sometimes, the door is better off closed. Hidden deep in your subconscious mind, buried under a pile of broken promises. 

“I’m going to shower.” you blurted in a hurry, walking past him to avoid the thoughts running through your head. 

The water was cold no matter which way the faucet turned, so you had to be quick unless catching hypothermia was on the list of things Mr. Lim wanted you to experience over this trip. If so, then you were ahead of the game. 

Wrapping yourself with a towel you washed off your makeup, combing your hair with a detangling brush before getting startled by the swinging of the door, hitting your side. 

“Hey! I wasn’t done.” 

“Sorry, it’s cold,” Jungkook whined, welcoming himself in. 

“Did you try putting on a shirt?” you scoffed, eyeing his naked chest before his furrowed gaze caught you red-handed. 

“It’s wet, smartass. And, I didn’t want to put new clothes on before showering.” 

“Well, go stand over there and face the wall,”

“Are you shy?” he teased, leaning on the counter. 

“Well, I’m not comfortable.” you hissed, tightening the fabric around your body. 

“I’ve seen you naked plenty of times, y/n,” Jungkook grinned, eyes squeezed shut as if reminiscing the good old days. 

“You don’t have to remind me. I'll be taking that sin to the grave,” 

But it was too late. Lips inches apart, your chest heaved up from the intensity of his heavy gaze, eyeing your form from top to bottom. Tilting your chin with his fingers, he leaned closer. 

“We can’t,” you blurted, hands hovering over his chest. 

“No?” he glanced at your scattering eyes, pressing your palm against his burning skin. 

“What about Soojin?” 

“What about her?” 

“Seems like you guys were hitting it off pretty well,” you hissed, looking past his glare. 

“Meh … not my type,” Jungkook scoffed, eyes flickering down your lips.

“Oh, really?” 

“Why? Was y/n jealous?” he said with a sly grin, tracing his fingers up your thigh. 

“Soojin, is not your type? Ha! Hard to believe when she was all over you a few days ago.” your tone was low, annoyed at the whole thing. You were jealous. Fine. Whatever. Moving right along. 

“Hmm, is that so? Then what does that say about us? If I leave a trail of kisses down your neck, does that mean you're my type?” he whispered in your ear, pulling your body onto the counter before finding himself between your legs. 

“I'm not your type,” you chuckled, ignoring the obvious tension. 

“I could've been a dad by now and you're questioning if you're my type? Really?” Jungkook teased, resting his forehead on yours.  

“Jungkook, the baby wasn’t yours.” you said firmly, palms holding his face to make sure he was paying attention. 

“But, it was yours. And, what’s yours is mine. Isn’t that right?” he winked, fingers intertwined with yours. Then it happened. The long-awaited kiss. And, although you knew this wasn’t the best of your decisions, you didn’t mind revisiting this door, at least for the time being.

Until that night. The night in the forest. When a locked door was the only thing separating you and Jungkook. 

“Call him. Let's see if he actually cares,” you could see the grin smear across the man’s masked face, as your blood-shot eyes swelled with tears. 

Hands tied behind your back, you watched him press the call button, turning the phone towards you before resting his knife right under your chin. 

“Jungkook!” you cried out with a shaky voice.

Ring Ring 

“Oh, shit, where’s my phone,” Jungkook exclaimed, patting his pockets before reaching for the glove compartment. 

“What the fuck?”

His eyes widened. It was you. Rather, snapshots of you. One’s that he had no recollection of taking. But, they looked strange. As if you also weren’t aware of them being captured. 

Call from 647-568-0349. Call from y/n-ie❤️ 

An automated voice broadcasted through the speaker system set up in his garage.

“Y/n?” Jungkook yelled out, bolting towards the locked door. 

“Jungkook … please …” you whimpered, feeling the tip of the knife poke into your skin as your chest heaved up.   

“What the fuck? Why won’t it open?” Jungkook growled, fidgeting with the knob before banging on the wooden door. But, no one was home. 

“Please … please … pick up.”

Running back into his car, he turned on the engine, scattering eyes looking back at the empty driveway until the garage door began closing on its own. 

And within seconds, he was trapped. No way in or out. But, the engine was still on, running inside the confined space. Gaseous fumes slowly intoxicating the air he was forced to breathe. 

“Fucking hell.” Jungkook coughed, covering his mouth with the sleeve of his hoodie. 

“Please …” you kept trying, hoping to hear his sweet voice on the other line. Completely naive to the carbon monoxide that was now spreading through his lungs. 

“Help!” he cried out, feeling the tightness in his throat. 

“Jungk-” you gasped, widened eyes glaring back at the masked man. 

“Tsk … what a shame.” he sneered, ending the call abruptly before piercing through the phone.

“Oh, angel, it’s okay. We can wait if you wish. Hopefully, his lungs don’t collapse,” he rasped against your hair, cold touch sending shivers down your back as you felt your heart sink.

[halobirthdays]

BY THE RINGS, IT'S HAPPENING AGAIN!!!

THEL 'VADAM'S BIRTHDAY IS ON DECEMBER 10!

In honor of our beloved, best boy's birthday, Halobirthdays is hosting another giveaway!

What does the winner get?

The winner will receive:

One (1) copy of Halo: The Cole Protocol, for a look at Thel before his rise to Supreme Commander.

One (1) copy of Halo: Outcasts, for the Arbiter we know and love (and also the most recent Halo publication).

One (1) color-changing desk light featuring everyone's favorite brothers-in-arms.

One (1) energy sword bookmark (for all the Halo reading you'll be doing).

One (1) Mark of Shame iron-on decal and;

One (1) high-quality print of the absolutely adorable commission by the talented @nagunkgunk.

The cost of shipping will be covered by Halobirthdays.

How do I enter?

I'm doing things a little differently this time.

You must be following Halobirthdays.

One (1) reblog per user will count. Likes do not count. If you would like to reblog to spread the word (which I appreciate) but do not want to enter, please let me know via message or in the tags.

You must have an address within the contiguous United States.

You must be eighteen years or older to enter.

When will a winner be selected?

This will run from the moment of this posting until 12:00AM EST on December 11, 2023. After that, the entries will be tallied and a winner will be randomly selected as soon as possible. Halobirthdays will contact the winner via Tumblr direct message. The winner has 24 hours to come forward and claim the prize. If they do not come forward, a new winner will be randomly selected.

Please make it clear that you are not a bot by tagging the post, and/or adding an icon and banner to your blog. It's not required, but reblogs and from suspected bot or giveaway accounts will be blocked.

Fine print below the cut:

This event is not affiliated with Tumblr.

This event will run until 12:00AM EST on December 11, 2023. One (1) winner will be randomly selected.

By participating, you affirm that you meet and agree to the terms and conditions set forth herein.

If a winner is selected but is found to not meet the eligibility criteria, they forfeit the prize and another winner will be selected.

Any issues regarding shipping once the prize has been mailed shall be settled between the winner and the carrier service. Halobirthdays will make a conscientious effort to ensure that the prize arrives undamaged. However, Halobirthdays shall be held blameless for any lost or stolen prizes, damage, and/or shipping delays during transit.

[cosmicstarlatte]

Lucifer A-Z Smut HCs (Obey Me!)

⬅Back to Smut HC A-Z Masterlist ◇

18+ only, minors do not interact.

My personal headcanons using this [prompt list]

The goal is to finish the whole list; you are welcome to request a letter so I get to it faster. I will work on it as quick as I can but keep in mind I do have a life & responsibilities lol. ^^

Last Updated: Nov.28.2023 (2 out of 26)

⚠️Notes: I'll tag any sections if needed. If you think a section needs a tag, kindly let me know.

A: Affair (Describe an extra-marital affair)

B: Birthday (Describe birthday sex)

C: Compliments (Mid- and post-sex compliments)

D: Dry Humping (Describe a dry-humping scene)

E: Experimenting (Trying something new)

F: Firsts (First time having sex together)

G: Gentle (Describe gentle/loving mid-sex gestures)

H: Handsy (When they can’t keep their hands to themselves)

Leave it to him to drive you both insane. I imagine one of the things he'd do is find a way to "pass" by you. his hands will find themselves along your waist, his dick print rubbing against your backside. He'd smirk while saying "Excuse me" while you stay contemplating jumping him in front of everyone.

I: Initiator (Who initiates most of the time? How?)

J: Jealous (“Claiming” a partner)

K: Kitchen (Describe a sex scene in the kitchen)

L: Likes (What they like in the bedroom)

M: Morning (Describe morning sex)

N: Never (Things they would never try)

O: Orgasm (Describe coming--who comes first? What do they say? How does the other person know it’s approaching?)

P: Playlist (A playlist for getting down and dirty; will probably include a lap dance song, a song for making love, and a song that represents their sex life)

Q: Quiet (Reaction to a quiet partner)

R: Ruttish (Signs that they’re horny)

If you're not dating Lucifer, it's going to be a little hard to tell...at first. He won't outright ask you for assistance. You notice the way he tends to hover around you & how his red eyes seem to linger for a second too long. Its also hard to miss the very faint blush across his cheeks when you happen to get close to him while in this state. Is he breathing? The biggest giveaway when he's pent up is the extra bitter mood that seems to last for days. Please, won't you fuck him for his (& everyone elses) sake? Feel free to surprise him for a late night visit in his office or room, he won't say no. ♡ Now if you are dating him... he'll say he's horny without really saying it. Prideful bastard. Perhaps he will ask you to sit on his lap & watch as you squirm, wanting what's poking you. Or perhaps he'll hold you against the wall, kissing & biting your neck, grinding his hard cock against you. Every time, he'll find a way to have you begging for it first.

S: Safe Word (How often is the safe word used? Why?)

T: Teasing (Who’s the tease in the relationship? What do they do? How often?)

U: Undressing (Strip teasing a partner)

V: Videos (Sending NSFW videos to each other)

W: Wedding Night (Consummating the marriage)

X: XXX (What kind of porn does the person watch? How often?)

Y: Yawn (How they sleep post-sex)

Z: Zoo (Their animalistic qualities in the bedroom)

[nameless-ken]

Silent Confessions, Loud Masks - Billy Hargrove x Reader Series

(Please reblog!!!) Happy reading! Comment below to be added to taglist.

Word Count: 4.6K

Warnings: bullying, fight scene, cursing, the usual angst and fluff

Introduction | Chapter one | Chapter two

Masterlist

(song for this chapter <3)

The neon lights of the state fair illuminate the warm August night. You and Robin weave through the crowd, laughing and chatting as you take in the sights and sounds. Cotton candy vendors, Ferris wheels, and carnival games fill the air with excitement.

“This is my favorite time.The end of summer. The amazing smell of funnel cakes in the air.” You sniff the air, stomach grumbling. 

“Oh, you know we're getting some of those. But first, let's check out the petting zoo!” Robin shouts, excitement dripping from her voice. 

As you make your way through the fairgrounds, Robin spots Steve, Nancy, and Jonathan by a photo booth. You approach the group, exchanging greetings and catching up. Jonathan and your eyes meet. You used to see him around school, a familiar camera always hanging around his neck but not much anymore since he graduated last year. 

“Hey, Y/N right?” Jonathan introduces, holding his hand out to you. 

“Yeah, nice to officially meet you Jonathan.” The warmth of his touch lingers in yours for a moment longer than necessary. You never noticed how cute and shy he was until now. 

“Nice camera.” You compliment, pointing to the camera resting against his chest. 

“Thanks. Are you into photography too?” He asks you, leaning against the photo booth that Robin, Steve and Nancy are in, arguing over what expressions to do. 

“Yeah, it's a hobby of mine. I love capturing moments.” 

“That's cool. What kind of camera do you use?”

“Oh, I have a Canon AE-1. It's my pride and joy. What about you?” Jonathan's eyes light up at the mention of the camera.

“No way, I have the same one! It's such a classic. There's just something special about shooting with film, you know?”

“Absolutely! The whole process of developing the film and seeing the prints come to life—it's magical.” You enjoy sharing a moment of understanding, how easily the conversation flows effortlessly.

“So, do you have a favorite subject to photograph?” He asks and you take a pause, surveying the crowded fairgrounds, deciding your answer. 

“Hmm, I love capturing candid moments of people, especially when they're lost in the moment and unaware of the camera. What about you?”

“I think I'm drawn to landscapes. There's something serene about capturing the beauty of nature. It's like freezing a moment in time.”

“It sounds like we have a lot in common when it comes to photography.” 

“Um, speaking of photography, there's this local art show happening on Saturday. I was wondering if you'd like to go with me?” You’re a little shocked at his forwardness and the invitation but smile in appreciation. “I mean, if you aren’t busy. I just thought you’d probably enjoy it and-”

“I’d love to!” You give his arm a squeeze in reassurance. Jonathan's shy smile widens at your enthusiastic response, a wave of relief washing over him.

“Great! It's at this small gallery downtown. I heard they have some amazing photography exhibits.”

“That sounds so cool. I’ve never been to one.” 

As the camera flashes inside the photo booth, capturing moments of laughter and silly poses, Robin, Steve, and Nancy emerge with wide smiles plastered on their faces.

“How many shots did that take to get one perfect pose?” Robin sighs and Steve chuckles, playfully nudging Robin as they join you and Jonathan.

“Hey, it's quality over quantity, Robin. Besides, we had to make sure we nailed the perfect expressions.”

“I don't know about perfect, but I'd say we definitely nailed the "awkwardly adorable" look.”  Nancy laughs along, her eyes twinkling with amusement.

As you all share a lighthearted moment, the atmosphere shifts abruptly as Billy and his group of lunatics make their presence known.

“Well, well, well, look what we have here. The freak show. Shouldn’t you guys be getting back to the circus?” Tommy, an old friend of Steve’s and Billy’s new sidekick blurts out with a laugh, nudging Billy in the side. 

You look at Billy, watching his body language and assessing what he’s going to do next after he “promised” you to be better. 

“Leave us alone. We don't want any trouble.” Jonathan surprisingly steps up first. But Billy and his friends show no signs of backing down, reveling in their torment.

“Aw, did I hurt little Jonathan's feelings? Maybe he should go cry to his mommy and freak of a brother.” Tommy responds tauntingly. 

Carol joins in, her laughter ringing out like a bell. “Or better yet, maybe he can take some pictures of his tears. I'm sure they'd make great art.”

Steve steps forward, his expression hardens with determination. “That's enough Tommy.”

You look over at Billy again to find his eyes already on you, looking down at your hand. You didn’t realize you grabbed onto Jonathan’s arm when he spoke up and haven’t let go since. You see Billy’s eyes narrow and jaw clench. 

Without warning, Billy shoves Steve, his jealousy boiling over into violence. Steve staggers back, caught off guard by the sudden attack.

Steve squares off against Billy, his muscles tense as he braces for the next move. Billy charges forward with a fierce yell, his fist aims straight for Steve's jaw.

Steve reacts quickly, dodging Billy's blow and retaliating with a powerful punch of his own. The impact sends Billy staggering backward, but he quickly regains his footing, his expression twisted with fury as a loud cackle escapes his mouth. 

In the midst of the chaos, you rush forward, attempting to intervene and pull Billy away from Steve. But Billy, blinded by his internal jealousy, lashes out wildly, narrowly missing you as he swings his fists in Steve’s direction again.

Nancy and Robin work together to pull Steve away. Steve's frustration mounts, his eyes burning with determination as he tries to break free and confront Billy once more.

“Billy, stop it! This is ridiculous.” You push at his chest as your friends take Steve away as Tommy and Carol run when you notice security getting closer. “Let’s go before you get us in real trouble.” 

Billy grabs your hand, leading the way to his car. “So now you don’t care if people see you with me? What was the problem back there? That was so uncalled for!” You exclaim, dragging your feet behind him as you make it to the empty field that’s been transformed into a parking lot. 

Billy drops your hand once you make it to his blue muscle car, lighting a cigarette and taking big puffs, blowing the smoke at thes sky. "How long have you and Jonathan been a thing?"

"What?" You stare at him in disbelief, crossing your arms in defense. "He's just a friend."

Billy scoffs, shaking his head, signature smirk gracing his roughed up face. "You're naive if you think he just wants to be your friend."

Your brow furrows as you struggle to comprehend Billy's accusations. "What are you talking about? Jonathan and I are just friends. Even if we weren’t, how is any of that your business?"

Billy's eyes narrow as he steps closer, his voice laced with jealousy. 

“Because... because I care about you, okay?” You take a step back from him, the intensity of his words catching you off guard. You know Billy enough to understand how he’s probably never said those words out loud to someone before. 

“Just forget it.” Billy runs a hand through his hair and opens his door, getting into his car and roars the engine.

“Billy-” He doesn’t give you a chance to respond, backing up quickly and speeds off, leaving you taken back by his admission. 

You stand in front of your mirror, fidgeting nervously with the hem of your dress. Robin flits around your room, pulling out various outfits and accessories.

“Okay, how about this one? It's cute and a little flirty, and perfect for a date at the art show.”

“It’s not a date, Robin.” You pout at yourself in the mirror, thoughts elsewhere as you try to shake off the lingering memories of Billy.

“Oh come on, the way you two were geeking out about cameras and shit. He’s so into you.” You force a laugh, but inside, your heart feels heavy with uncertainty. The moment of Billy's jealousy lingers, casting a shadow over your excitement for your evening with Jonathan.

‘Yeah, well, we're just friends. That's all.” Robin studies you for a moment, her expression filled with concern.

“Are you sure about that? Because it seems like there's something more there.” Robin asks softly, sitting on the edge of your bed with a pointed look. 

You shrug, trying to dismiss Robin's observation. “It doesn't matter anyway. Let's just focus on finding the perfect outfit, okay?”

Robin nods, sensing your reluctance to delve deeper into the topic. With a determined smile, she resumes her search for the ideal ensemble, hoping to lift your spirits and set the stage for an amazing night, regardless of what may or may not be brewing between you and Jonathan.

Jonathan's car pulls up outside your house, and you emerge, nervousness fluttering in your chest. Jonathan steps out of the car, a warm smile on his face as he approaches you.

“Hey, Y/N. You look amazing.” He opens the door for you.

You blush, grateful for his compliment as you climb into the passenger seat. “Thanks, Jonathan. You look nice too.”

As Jonathan starts the car and pulls away from the curb. You’re thankful for the conversation that comes easily between you as he drives towards the local art show, nerves slowly disappearing.

You both wander through the art gallery, admiring the various exhibits on display, pausing in front of a striking black-and-white photograph, lost in silent contemplation.

“This one is beautiful. The way the photographer captured the light... It's mesmerizing.”

“Yeah, I love how photography has the power to evoke such strong emotions. It's like a window into someone else's world.”

The silence between you feels nice, the shared appreciation for the art binding you together in a moment of quiet reflection. It’s refreshing to spend time with someone who shares the same interests. As you continue to explore the gallery, each new exhibit sparks conversation and sparks a deeper connection between you and Jonathan, solidifying this new bond formed through your shared love of photography.

As you both exit the art gallery, the crisp evening air greets you with the gentle hum of the bustling streets. You and Jonathan walk a block away to the local diner, one of your favorite spots in this sleepy town. 

As you and Jonathan walk inside, your eyes inadvertently drift to a corner booth where Billy and his friends are seated. You quickly avert your gaze, hoping to avoid any unnecessary confrontation. You both settle into a booth, hoping for once, Billy and his friends leave you alone. 

However, the air in the diner grows tense as Billy and his friends become increasingly boisterous, their voices rising above the ambient chatter. Your jaw clenches as you overhear some of their rude remarks, directed not just at you but also at Jonathan. You start to feel a surge of anger and frustration, but you try to maintain your composure for Jonathan's sake.

Jonathan notices the change in atmosphere and offers you a reassuring smile, silently urging you to ignore Billy and his friends. The tension in the air remains palpable, casting a shadow over the otherwise pleasant evening.

Jonathan tries to lighten up the mood and tells you the story of when Will got a lego stuck up his nose. You lean back in your seat, laughter bubbling up in response.

Billy's irritation mounts. He can't stand the way you look so carefree and happy in Jonathan's presence. With a determined stride, Billy stands up and walks over to your table, his smirk laced with malice as he takes a seat beside you, ignoring Jonathan's attempts to diffuse the situation.

"Billy, what are you doing?" Your voice is tinged with annoyance as you shoot him a warning glare, but Billy brushes off your protest with a dismissive wave of his hand.

"Just thought I'd join in on the fun," Billy retorts, his tone dripping with sarcasm.

Jonathan tries to intervene, his voice calm but firm as he urges Billy to leave you alone, but Billy refuses to listen. The tension in the air thickens as your anger reaches its boiling point.

"Billy, enough!" your voice cuts through the diner as you confront him head-on. "You always have to ruin everything, don't you? Can't you see that you're not wanted here?"

Billy's smirk falters, realizing how much he’s affecting you in the moment and stands up from the booth. “Fine but don't come crying to me when this little thing of yours falls apart.”

Your jaw clenches at his hurtful words, patience wearing thin as you rise from your seat, Jonathan following suit.

“We're leaving.” You respond icily, glaring at Billy and grabbing Jonthan’s hand, pulling him out of the diner and into the cool night air.

“Are you okay?” Jonathan wonders as you walk to his car. 

You nod, slight tears prickling at your eyes due to the frustration you feel with Billy. It’s becoming overwhelming the way he picks and chooses when he’s nice to you. 

“Yeah, I'll be fine. Let's just get out of here.”

As you settle into the car, the tension begins to dissipate, replaced by a sense of relief as Jonathan starts the engine and pulls away. The soft hum of the car fills the silence as you drive through the quiet streets, each of you lost in your own thoughts over the ruined evening.

“Thanks Jonathan. I’m sorry for how the evening ended but I had a nice time.” You give him a graceful smile as he drives up to your house. 

“Thanks for coming with me. We should do this again sometime, you know, without the rude interruptions.” 

“Definitely.” you laugh lightly, opening the door and stepping out of the car. “Thanks again.” 

“Goodnight Y/N.” Jonathan says softly as you wave goodbye and watch him drive away into the night.

"Goodnight, Jonathan," you murmur to yourself, feeling a sense of gratitude for his understanding and support amidst the chaos that is Billy Hargrove. With a sigh, you turn and head inside your house, hoping that the next time you and Jonathan spend time together, it will be free from any unwanted intrusions.

Your heart sinks to the floor immediately as you walk into school on Monday morning, spotting Billy at your locker. He’s never willingly appeared anywhere you are, especially at school where everyone watches his every movement. You are still upset about the way he treated you and your friends this weekend, it almost makes you sick thinking about it again. 

Without a second thought, you quickly turn, hoping to avoid any confrontation. But as you walk away, you can feel Billy's eyes burning into your back, and sure enough, you hear his footsteps quicken as he strides after you.

“Y/N, wait!” He catches some students' attention as he calls after you across the hallway. 

Your steps falter momentarily, but you quickly regain your composure and continue walking, determined to put as much distance between you and him as possible. But Billy is persistent, stepping in front of you and blocking your path.

“Y/N, please can we talk?” Your patience is already wearing thin as you push back.

“We have nothing to talk about, Billy. If this is about our book project, it can wait until after school.”

Billy refuses to back down, he grabs a hold of your wrist, pulling you through the hallways behind him. His grip tightening as he crosses the gym and pushes open the heavy doors leading to the small alleyway beside the gym. 

“Billy, let go of me! You’re hurting me.” You cry and Billy immediately lets go. 

“I’m sorry.” Billy spits out frantically, softly grazing your wrist with his thumb. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.” 

All you can hear is your heart pounding in your chest as Billy pulls out a cigarette, the smell of smoke filling the air as he lights it, his actions speaking louder than words. You watch him silently, waiting for him to explain himself, but he remains silent, his eyes clouded with a mixture of regret and need.

“Billy, what do you want?”

He doesn't answer, his gaze fixed on you with an intensity that sends a shiver down your spine. You take a step back feeling the cold brick beneath you, a surge of frustration and confusion welling up inside you.

“Why did you have to do what you did on Saturday? And to Steve? I was having a great time, and you just had to step in for no reason.”

Billy's expression softens slightly at your words. “Did you mean it when you said I ruin everything?”

Your brow furrows in confusion, your memory flashing back to the heat of the moment inside the diner. “... I don't remember saying that…” Billy interrupts you, his voice tinged with bitterness as he stomps out his cigarette with his boot.

“Well, maybe you should, because it's true. That's what my dad has been telling me since I was a kid—that I ruin everything. And maybe he's right.”

The pain in his voice makes your heart break all over again for him. You didn’t realize how hurtful that can be to someone in his position. Your frustration slowly melts away as you realize the depth of his inner turmoil. You reach out tentatively, hand hovering in the space between them.

“Billy, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that.” He scoffs at your apology, eyes flashing with self-loathing.

“You don't get it, do you? You don't understand what it's like to feel like you're constantly screwing everything up. And maybe I am jealous, okay? Maybe I'm jealous because I'm afraid of losing you.”

Your breath catches in your throat at his confession, your own emotions swirling as you struggle to process his words. You reach out to him, hand brushing against his arm in a gesture of comfort.

“Billy, you don't have to be afraid. I'm not going anywhere. I'll always be here for you.” He meets your gaze. “But it’s not an excuse for acting like an asshole. You said you’d try to be better and then you go and beat up Steve. When will things change?” 

“Fuck, I know, Y/N. And I'm sorry for what happened with Steve. I messed up.” You can see the pain etched into his features, the weight of his struggles bearing down on him like a heavy burden. He leans one arm beside your head against the brick, face closer than normal. 

“I understand what you’re dealing with, Billy. But you can't keep hurting people because you're hurting too. You have to find a way to deal with your anger and your pain without taking it out on others.” Billy's shoulders slump, his expression weary as he runs his other hand through his hair, breath fanning out in your face, hints of mint and tobacco filling your nose. 

“I know, Y/N. I'm trying, I really am. But sometimes it feels like I'm drowning, and you…you make everything feel lighter.” He whispers, eyes closing and softly bumps his forehead against yours. 

“Come over after school. I’m giving you one more chance, Billy.” You give him another opportunity to show you he’s willing to try and be different, not just say it but do it. 

“I promise I won’t screw this up again.” Billy’s eyes meet yours intensely. 

“4 pm. Don’t be late. I have work later tonight.” You command and he steps back to put distance between you. You find yourself missing the warmth his body radiates. 

“See you then, little mouse.” Billy offers you a small, almost shy smile before turning to leave, his footsteps echoing against the pavement as he disappears around the corner. 

As Billy disappears from view, you can't help but cling to a sense of hope that your words have resonated with him, sparking a genuine desire to change. Despite the weight of his past actions, you can't shake the empathy you feel for him and the turmoil he endures every day. You're determined to be a beacon of light in his darkness, to show him the beauty and gentleness that life has to offer when given a chance. You know it won't be easy, but you're committed to walking alongside him on his journey toward healing and redemption.

As the clock struck the agreed-upon time, there was a knock at your front door. Opening the door, you welcome Billy in with a smile.

“Welcome to my humble abode.” Billy steps inside, glancing around the modest entryway of your small two-bedroom house. You motion for him to follow as you lead the way into the living room.

"Come on in. I'll give you the grand tour," You say with a hint of amusement, knowing there wasn't much to show.

He follows you through the living room, which doubled as your dad's makeshift office space, cluttered with paperwork stacked high in a worn-out armchair. Billy’s eyes scan the room before following you down the narrow hallway to your room, which serves as a sanctuary of sorts amidst the messiness of our humble home. Pushing open the door, you usher him inside.

"Welcome to my domain," You declare proudly, gesturing around the small space.

Your room was certainly a reflection of your eclectic tastes and passions. Photographs adorned the walls, capturing moments from your life that held special significance. Stacks of vinyl records and cassette tapes sat beside an old record player. Film rolls were scattered across your desk, waiting to be developed into cherished memories. Cameras of varying sizes and ages rested on shelves, each one a tool for capturing the beauty of the world around.

Books lined the shelves, their worn spines bearing the marks of countless readings. Yarn and crochet hooks lay strewn about, evidence of your latest creative endeavors.

You can’t help but watch as Billy takes it all in, his eyes widening with curiosity and appreciation. There was a warmth in his gaze, a recognition of something familiar in the midst of the unfamiliar.

"You've got quite the setup here," he remarks, his voice full of genuine admiration.

You smile, feeling a sense of pride in sharing a special piece of yourself with him. In that moment, you realize that despite the modesty of your surroundings, there was beauty and richness to be found in the things that mattered most to you. And you couldn’t help but admit that Billy has become one of those things. 

"Thanks," You respond, settling onto your bed with a sense of contentment and Billy joins you. 

As you delve into the next chapter of the book report, the quietness of your room envelopes you both like a cozy blanket. Billy pauses for a moment, looking around with a contemplative expression.

"You must enjoy the quiet," he observes.

"Yeah, I do. It’s nice to be able to bask in peace."

Billy's gaze lingers on your for a moment before he speaks again. "But it must get lonely, being here all by yourself most of the time."

"Yeah, it can," you admit quietly, meeting his gaze. "That's why I like books so much. They give me comfort and escape, you know? It's like I can lose myself in the words on the pages and forget about everything else for a while."

Billy nods understandingly, "I get that," he says softly and retreats suddenly from your bed, his eyes drawn to a box of photographs sitting on your desk. Curiosity piqued, he begins rifling through them, his fingers delicately handling each image as if afraid to disturb the memories captured within.

You watch him from the bed, pen pausing mid-sentence. The photographs were a glimpse into your past, a collection of moments frozen in time that told the story of your family's journey. Among them were pictures of a woman who bore a striking resemblance to you, along with snapshots of your dad, sister, and you growing up.

"That's my mom," You break the silence that has settled in the air.

Billy looks up from the photographs, his expression softening with understanding. "She looks... she looks a lot like you.”

"Yeah, she did. I got my love for photography from her," A bittersweet smile playing at the corners of your lips. "She used to take me and my sister on all sorts of adventures, capturing moments with her camera."

There was a heaviness in your words, a weight of sorrow carried by the memories of a mother lost too soon. You could see a flicker of recognition in Billy's eyes, a shared understanding of the pain of losing a parent.

"I don't have many photos from my childhood," Billy confesses quietly, his mind drifting to the lone picture of his mother that he kept tucked away in his wallet. "Just one of my mom. She left when I was ten."

You felt a pang of empathy for him, a deep ache for the loss he had endured. "I'm sorry," You murmur. 

Billy's eyes meet yours, a silent understanding passing between you. In that moment, you were not just two teenagers working on a book report and figuring out what this truly was between you—you were kindred spirits bound together by the shared experience of loss and loneliness.

"It gets hard sometimes, doesn't it?" Billy asks softly, his voice barely above a whisper.

You nod, feeling the weight of his words resonate within. "Yeah, it does," The vulnerability of your shared pain forging a bond between you that feels both fragile and unbreakable.

And as you sat there, two souls united by grief and longing, you couldn't help but feel grateful for the unexpected connection that had blossomed amidst the quiet solitude of your room. In each other's company, the burden of loneliness felt a little lighter, replaced by the warmth of companionship.

"You're so polite with your sadness," he tells you, his voice gentle yet piercing. "It's like you don't want to ruin anything for anyone else."

His words struck a chord within you, stirring feelings of guilt and self-awareness that you had long tried to suppress. It was true—you had spent so much time trying to hide your pain, to shield others from the weight of your sorrow, that you had forgotten how to truly acknowledge it yourself.

"I don't feel the need to bother other people with my problems," You reply quietly. It was a defense mechanism, a way of protecting yourself from the vulnerability of opening up to others. But in doing so, you had inadvertently closed yourself off from the possibility of genuine connection and understanding.

Billy regards you with a mixture of empathy and concern, his eyes searching yours for any sign of need. In that moment, you felt a flicker of something stirring within—a longing for connection, a yearning to be seen and understood for who you truly are.

"You don't have to carry it all on your own, you know," His words are a gentle reminder of the strength that could be found in vulnerability. "Sometimes, it helps to share the burden with someone else." Billy sits back down beside you, thighs touching but you need more. You graze for his hand, softly running your fingers against the top of his hand and slowly turning it over. You trace his calloused palm, feeling him go tense, trying his hardest to not clench his fist together. You finally thread your fingers through his, squeezing a few times. You look up at him, his gaze locked on your hands, bound together and resting on his thigh. 

“You don’t have to carry everything on your own either, Billy.” Your whisper, and he repeats your words over and over in his head. 

And as you sit there, two souls united by grief and longing, you believe you both can find the courage to confront your pain and begin the journey toward healing together.

Taglist: @msbillyhargrove @uselessbutinteresting @milestellergfs @periwinkle-quill @ghostcastaway @iletmytittiestitty-russ @missingbillyhargrove @lotionlamp @billys-pretty-babe @isimpfortoomanypeople @rosey96

[youvebeenlivingfictional]

Year One (II)

Part Five of Three Years

Year Three | Masterlist |

Pairing: Nathan Bateman x Reader

Rating: Explicit - 18+ Only.

Length: 8.5K

Notes: ….Hi! It’s the final part!! And only a week late!!! Thank you for reading 💖

Warnings: Cursing; angst; enemies to enemies who fuck to lovers; tech-talk; angst (I know I said it before but really); Nathan being Nathan; vaginal sex; fingering; creampie; choking; oral sex (male and female receiving)

Summary: Keeping Bateman off your mind isn’t so difficult, once you get down to it. Sure, there’s a little a bit of a lull. At the start, hearing him on the odd conference call throws you off for a few moments. In the midst of taking notes, your mind will flash to the sound of him grunting low in your ear, the memory of the press of his body against yours, and the phantom weight of his hand heavy on your throat.

BlueBook’s campus is stunningly large and confusing. Sc(ai)le is a far smaller operation, and is likely to remain so, and you’d been certain when you signed the contract that this vast new environment would be well out of your realm of familiarity. But receiving a map for the BlueBook campus along with your other documentation for orientation made your stomach churn. The differences are staggering. BlueBook’s Silicon Valley office has four separate buildings. 3/4ths of the parking lot is designed for electric vehicles; regular vehicles have parking furthest from the main building. There are multiple cafeterias and cafés on the premises. There are designated nap rooms. 

Maybe it’s an archaic approach, but you go out of your way to print out the map that was sent to you ahead of your first day. When you pull up for work your first morning, you are insanely happy that you did. You stop in the lobby once you get your badge, eyeing the print-out as people simply stride past you like you aren’t even there. You’re almost alright with that. You don't really want to explain who you are to some random BlueBook employee as you ask for help. But this behavior also lays the company’s culture plain. If you were at Sc(ai)le, at least one person would stop and ask if you needed help. Here, moving into a junior leadership position, you’re completely invisible. 

--  

“Sooo, how are the new digs?” 

“...They’re fine,” You fib to Jenn, looking around at the office. It’s not a complete lie; they’re not bad. Your name is on the door; the size is about the same as your old office. But where your office at Sc(ai)le had been bright and open, this feels…Closed in. It doesn’t have the same fishtank quality, and where your old office had initially left you feeling exposed, this office makes you feel like you’re sitting in a file box on a shelf somewhere. There’s a window behind you, but it faces another building, and doesn’t let in nearly the same amount of light as your previous office.  

“Uh-oh.” 

“Uh-oh?” You frown, “What ‘uh-oh’?” 

“I know that tone. What’s wrong with it?” 

“Nothing’s wrong with it!” 

“You sure? I don’t wanna brag, but I know the guy in charge, and I can put in a good word.” 

“Oh, yeah,” You scoff a laugh, “Bring my problem to Bateman for me, that’s all I need.” 

Jenn goes quiet for a few seconds before she hedges, “I thought you guys were better now.” 

You raise your hand, scrubbing it across the back of your neck as you fight back a sigh. 

“We are,” You insist, “I just mean, you know…Even if Bateman did like me, this would so put me on his shit list. And I need to watch my step around here. It’s different now.” 

“Yeah,” Jenn agrees, “It is.” 

You can hear the creaking of her office chair, and practically picture her twisting back and forth in it. 

“Can we do dinner at the end of this week?” You ask, hoping that she won’t call you on the subject change. “I want all of the dirt, you know. Hear how it’s going with my fearless leadership.”

“Sure.” It’s a relief as her tone shifts, as you can practically hear her smile. “Friday? Saturday? Sunday?” 

“Friday, please. I’m guessing I’ll need all weekend to recover.” 

“You’re damn right,” She chuckles. “Friday it is.” 

“I’ll text you some options before I make any reservations.” 

“Sounds good.” 

“Alright. Have a good day, Jenn.”

“You, too, girlie.” 

You smile, lowering your phone and hanging up. You’re about to set it on the desk when your phone flashes with another call. You grimace at the sight of the contact, despite the way that your stomach flutters. You consider not answering it at all—and then swipe to answer it right before it can go to voicemail. 

“Took you long enough.” Nathan doesn’t give you a chance to say a thing before he’s filling your ear. “Who were you talking to?” 

“Excuse me?” 

“I got a busy signal twice.” 

“That’s none of your business.” 

“I wanna know.” 

“Well that’s too damn bad.” 

“I could take a guess.” 

“Feel free.” 

“...” 

“Well?” 

“I’ve decided I don’t care.” 

“Do you have a reason for calling me?” 

“Figured I’d check in, day one and all that.” 

“Nothing to report so far.” 

“Really.” 

“Nope. Had two whole meetings and got my email set up.” 

“Well look at you, you little overachiever. Usually people don’t get their email set up until their second day.” 

“You know me, I like to hit the ground running.” 

“Mhm. Listen, I’m gonna be in town this weekend—” 

“Okay—” 

“—So I’ll put something on your calendar.” 

“For what reason?” 

“To check-in.” 

“I think check-ins like this are just fine.” 

“I may as well see you while I’m in town.” 

“What for?” 

“It’s customary to take a new hire in leadership for dinner.” A pause. Then, “Why else would I want to see you?” 

You lean back in your seat, fighting the urge to squeeze your thighs together. The way he leads you into this question shouldn’t send tingles through your body. You’d forgone Bateman’s invitation to visit him before your stint at BlueBook had started, and haven’t been with him—or anyone—in a few weeks. Still, you’ve had longer dry spells. 

“I don’t know,” You pass off breezily. “You tell me.” 

“I don’t miss you,” He laughs. You think that he may mean for it to sound cruel, but you’ve come to know him a little too well, and he shockingly just manages to miss that mark. 

“Good,” You lean back in your seat a little more. “I don’t miss you, either.”

“Good.” 

“And I’m afraid I have plans this weekend, so unless you’re planning on adding some kind of bonus or overtime on this, I won’t be joining you.” 

A weighty pause, a truly stomach-churning beat before, “Fine.” 

He practically yawns it. 

“Great,” You pronounce crisply. “I have a meeting to get to, so—” 

“That’s funny, so do I—” 

“I’m gonna hop off—”

“—Happy to give you some time back.” 

“Great.” 

“Sure.” 

You draw the phone back from your ear again, rolling your eyes as his contact flashes, then disappears. Happy to give you some time back—the audacity. As if he'd put an actual meeting on your calendar for that useless call. You lean a little further back in your chair, then flail and hurriedly straighten before it can fully tip backward. Yikes, that was close. You puff out a panicked breath as you settle, tossing your phone onto the desk. 

He doesn’t miss you. Good! That’s good. You don’t miss him either. You don’t want him to miss you. You don’t need him to miss you. 

You need…To charge your vibrator. You could get on the dating apps again. It’s been a while. The last time you bothered was before you joined Sc(ai)le. Maybe the dating landscape isn’t as bad as it used to be.

You wince, shifting in your seat. You already know that you’re kidding yourself. There’s no way the apps are a good option now. They were barely a good option then. You’ll just have to up your vibrator game. There’s one you’ve had your eye on for a while, anyway. Nothing better to get with your signing bonus.

--  

Keeping Bateman off your mind isn’t so difficult, once you get down to it. Sure, there’s a little a bit of a lull. At the start, hearing him on the odd conference call throws you off for a few moments. In the midst of taking notes, your mind will flash to the sound of him grunting low in your ear, the memory of the press of his body against yours, and the phantom weight of his hand heavy on your throat. The first few times, you swallow thickly and reach for your coffee, or water, washing down the thought. Slowly, though, you manage to put a wall up. The Bateman on the phone isn’t the same guy that had fucked you, or the same guy that you slapped. 

Okay, well, technically, he is. 

But this is Business Bateman. This guy is no longer at least one level removed from your day-to-day. You’d been fucked by Bastard Bateman—Banker Bateman, even. This Bateman isn’t teasing any of you over the phone during team meetings. There aren’t hefty pauses for effect, or to bait you into answering him first. He’s to-the-point. He doesn't wait for answers; he demands them. 

After a couple of months, you manage to convince yourself that you prefer it this way. You tell yourself that you don’t miss Nathan. You don’t miss his cock, his teasing, or smacking his smug fucking face. It really is better this way. Your life is almost back to normal. Your friendship with Jenn is on a positive trend. You manage to see her at least every other week, and your smiles at the mention of Nathan’s name gradually become less forced. 

The shift is critical. Despite your relative proximity, you feel far less tense on a day to day basis. Sure, there’s an itch that just isn’t being scratched for you right now—but you’re not bracing for whatever shit Bateman may pull next, or operating with a fear that Jenn may learn just how much time you actually spend with Nathan. It still weighs on you, though. There are moments when you feel the heavy truth of it on your tongue, and you consider telling her—but the conversation otherwise feels so bright, and so easy, and you can’t bring yourself to shatter the moment. 

You’re certain Nathan hasn’t told her, either—if he had, you’d know by now. Jenn doesn’t shield her feelings well from anyone, but especially not from you. You know that her crush is still affecting her in full-force, but as far as you know, she hasn’t acted on it. The conversations about Bateman becoming part of the board would’ve backed off by now if she had. If anything, those have increased. 

Worse, from what she’s been telling you, you think that he may be considering it. You’re in no place to influence business on either end anymore. You don’t want to buzz in Jenn’s ear, insist that she take more time to think about this. She’s been thinking about this move for three years now. You don’t want buzz in Nathan’s ear about it, either. Whatever you tell him to do, you’re certain he’ll do the exact opposite to spite you. The only thing worse than impacting Jenn’s company negatively from the inside is managing to negatively impact it after you’ve left. Sc(ai)le’s direction is none of your business anymore. You need to make peace with that. 

--  

“Knock knock.” 

You can’t help but look up, stunned. You haven’t heard his voice over anything but a phone for nearly six months. That’s sort of your fault—he did offer to take you to dinner. But you didn’t trust him then. You almost don’t trust his appearance now. Frankly, seeing him shouldn’t be such surprise. You work at his company, after all. But this little sneak-attack is something that you haven’t been treated to in a very long time. 

“Hi there,” He adds, and you realize that you’ve done nothing but stare at him. 

“Hi,” You manage. “You here for a talk or are you just stopping by?” 

“Just stopping by.” He pushes himself off of the door frame, and you turn back to your laptop as he takes lazy, drifting steps around your office. You watch him out of the corner of your eye, taking in the snug fit of his polo shirt, and the swell of his ass beneath his—sweatpants. The man wore sweatpants to his own office. You can’t help but shake your head a little as you come to that realization, turning fully back to your screen. 

“You here for the All Hands?” You ask. 

“Yup.” 

“Surprised you’re not zooming in as usual.”

“I happened to be in town, figured I may as well make an appearance.”

“In sweatpants?” The indignant shock slips out before you can stop it. He just snorts, amused. 

“I have a change of clothes in my office.” 

Of course he does. 

“So,” He rounds your desk, leaning against it and watching you work, “How do you like it?” 

“The work? It’s fine.” 

“Better or worse than Sc(ai)le?” 

“Not better or worse. Just different.” 

He watches you for a few moments longer. “But BlueBook is better, right?” 

You roll your eyes a little bit, biting back a smile. 

“If it helps you sleep at night, Nathan, yes. BlueBook is better.” 

“I knew it.” 

“Uh-huh.” 

“I’m telling Jenn.” 

“She’ll never believe you.” 

“...Do you still have that policy?” 

You immediately know exactly what he’s asking about, but you let out a confused, questioning hum. 

“Not sure what you mean.” 

“Really.” 

“You’re going to have to refresh my memory.”

You hear the soft huff of Nathan’s laugh, and the slight hush of him pushing off of your desk. You’re certain that he’ll just leave, but Nathan rests one hand on your desk, and the other on the back of your chair as he leans over you. 

“Well I’ve been told,” You shiver as his breath brushes your neck, “That you don’t fuck your boss.” 

“Oh, that policy.” 

“Mm.” 

“That one is still in place.” 

“Really.” 

“Firmly.” 

“That’s too bad,” Nathan sighs. 

“Oh?”

“Yeah. You’re fired.” 

“Sure.” You don’t even flinch. You know that he’s not serious. At least…You’re pretty sure. 

“Pack it up.” 

“Can I send this email first.” You glance back toward him, and feel a touch of relief when you find him smiling warmly at you. You shake your head a little, turning back to the screen as you fight off your own smile. 

“Thought you said I wasn’t irresistible,” You remind him. 

“You’re not.”

“And that you don’t miss me.” 

“...I don’t.” 

The pause makes your stomach flip. You swipe your tongue across your lips, considering. 

“In town for long?” You ask. 

“The next week.” 

“Alright.”

 “So?” 

“So…” You shrug, “Maybe I'll quit BlueBook for the weekend.” 

“Just the weekend?” 

“Maybe.” 

“Hm.” 

“You can’t expect me to…Quit for longer than that.” 

“You haven’t taken any vacation days, have you?” 

You scoff, turning toward him fully. 

“Excuse me, but I might have plans for that.” 

“Do you?”

“That’s none of your business.” 

“I’m making it my business.” 

“The weekend.”

“The week.” 

“The—I can’t do that.” 

“Sure you can.”

“It’s too short notice! I’d have to work out coverage.” 

“Then work it out.” Your stomach swoops as Bateman leans in a touch closer, his gaze sweeping from your eyes to linger on your lips. “Call in sick today after the All Hands and we’ll get a head start.” 

“You’re trying to get me in trouble.” 

“You’re making it harder than you need to.” 

“Your cock or your plan?” 

Nathan grins. 

“Would it shock you if I said both?” 

“Not one bit.” 

“Good.” He grips your jaw, giving it a squeeze before he lets go and straightens, turning away. “Block off your calendar. I’ll send you the address.” 

You lean back in your seat, unable to help watching him as he leaves. You wait for him to turn back, to shoot you a smile or a wink, to tell you that he’s kidding—but he doesn’t say or do a thing as he goes. You bite your lip, hesitantly turning toward your laptop again and opening your calendar. The next week doesn’t look…Too busy. There are a few status calls that you’re not necessarily needed on. The deliverables that you have could be shifted, and surely in the next week, you’ll have some time to yourself. You can bring your work laptop home with you. You wince. You’ve done a pretty good job of keeping your work out of your apartment. But hell, it’s been three and a half years. If you’re only starting to take your work home with you now, that’s pretty good. 

You have 20 PTO days. Are you seriously going to take five of them just to be at Bateman’s beck and call? 

--  

You don’t even make it to his place before it starts. 

You can’t focus through the All Hands; you’re distracted. You can’t get your head together. You sit there, going back and forth and back and forth on whether or not taking this time off is actually a good idea. You could always take the time and then go back to the office if you decide that this just isn’t working for you. But then, Nathan might talk you into staying with him for a few more days. 

How the hell did he talk you into this in the first place? 

You desperately try to swallow against your drying throat, glancing around. Everyone is engaged with what Bateman is saying up front, or splitting their attention between their laptops and phones, still answering emails and slack messages while Bateman fills them in on funding updates and the state of the company. You ought to be focusing, too, but you suddenly feel so—hot. It’s not sexy, either. It’s like your skin is prickling from the inside. You scrub your sweaty palms against the fabric of work jeans, shifting uncomfortably in your—in your seat—

You push yourself up, mumbling your apologies as you squeeze past the other people in the aisle. You don’t look back as you hurry toward the door at the back of the conference space, even as your ears catch on Nathan’s comments that the latest BlueBookTab is set to complete its final round of QA by the end of Q2. 

You wind your way through the halls, your stomach twisting with discomfort. You already put in for your time off, cited the fact that you were sick. Surely your hasty exit would’ve lent credence to that—but maybe you could still retract that PTO request. Or maybe you could—Hell, what can you do? 

You reach your office and draw in a relieved breath at the complete silence and calm. Water, you need water. You take up your water bottle, taking a greedy swig. You must’ve had too much coffee this morning, maybe that’s why you feel so—blegh, so weird. Or maybe it’s a sign. If you feel this uneasy, this unsure about spending time with Nathan, it must mean that your time likely wouldn’t be such a good idea, anyway. You can tell Nathan that. You can calmly, rationally tell Nathan that you’ve changed your mind. He won’t care—

“What’s going on?” 

You whirl around at the sound of his question. Nathan looks almost bored, and sounds mildly perplexed. 

“What are you,” You wave back toward the door, “What about the All Hands?” 

“It’s finished.” 

“...Oh.” 

“Yeah. You ran out, like, right before I wrapped things up. Did you pay any attention to the agenda?” 

“Not really, no.” 

“Why did I even hire you,” Nathan chuckles, kicking the door shut behind himself. 

“You tell me,” You bite out. Nathan rolls his eyes, further rankling the irritated nerves in your belly. 

“Relax, sweetheart. It was a joke.” 

“It wasn’t for me.” 

“You want me to tell you?” His brows raise as he walks closer. “You’re kidding me.” 

“And if I’m not?” 

“What’s wrong with you?” He presses. You push a short breath out through your nose, shaking your head as you search for the words.

“I’m just—” You clear your throat. “I’m having some second thoughts.” 

“About?” 

“This.” 

“BlueBook?” 

“This,” You clarify, waggling the finger between the two of you. 

“If you’re that worried about coverage, bring your laptop with you.” 

“Then what’s the point in leaving the office? Look,” You groan, “I’m sure you can find someone else to fuck.” 

“Sure I can. I have.” 

It’s like a slap in the face. You stare at him for a moment, stunned. 

“I—Then—” You splutter, “Why—? Are you with someone?” 

“Not with,” He plops into a chair. “Just…You know.” 

“No, I don’t know, Nathan. That’s why I’m asking.” 

“The hell does it matter to you, huh? Why are you so hung up on this?” 

“I’m not, I’m just—” 

“—You clearly are—” 

“I just want—Fuck, I don’t know, if you’re like, dating someone, I don’t wanna insert myself in whatever the hell mess that would be.” 

“I told you, I’m not with anyone,” He repeats boredly. “Satisfied?” 

You consider for a moment. Are you? You’re not sure you are. You were having reservations before he mentioned that he had found someone else to screw around with. 

“...No,” You finally determine, shaking your head. “I’m not.” 

“Fuck,” Nathan groans, tipping his head back before he pushes himself up out of the chair. “Alright, forget it. I don’t know when the hell you got so fucking boring.” 

“Excuse me?”

“What, is your listening comprehension going, too?”

“Fuck you!” 

“You had your chance, sweetheart.” 

“You wanna say that to my fucking face, Bateman?” 

Seeing him stop just a few steps from the door and whirl around to you makes your hair stand on end. 

“Which part did you miss, huh?” He spits as he grows closer, “Where’d I fucking lose you?” 

“You haven’t had me since day one, you self-centered, self-righteous asshole—” You suck in a breath as he roughly grips your jaw, shutting you up. Your heart pounds in your chest as Nathan presses close, backing you up against the harsh edge of your desk. You raise your hands, grasping Nathan’s wrist so roughly that your nails bite into his skin. His lips twitch with a contentious smile as his hips shift against yours. 

“I haven’t had you since day one where, honey? Here?” He asks in a low, cruel murmur. He nudges you back to sit on the desk before he tips his head, eyes searching yours. “This is my company, sweetheart. My name’s on the fucking door. I’ve had you the entire goddamn time.” 

His mouth covers yours before you can gripe or argue. You groan at the contact, only allowing yourself to savor it for a few moments before you bite down harshly on his plump lower lip. Nathan’s hand slips from your jaw, smoothing down to squeeze around the sides of your neck. You whimper, reaching out to grasp and twist the fabric of his collar, hauling him closer. Bateman draws back with a slick sound, peering at you as he squeezes just a little harder. Your lips remain parted, heaving in tight breaths as stars begin to crowd your eyes. You hear a sharp whine, and it’s a moment before you realize that the sound came from you. Nathan tuts and shushes you softly as he loosens his grasp. 

“There’s no lock on that door,” He murmurs, “You want everyone to come in? See you spreading your legs for me like this?” 

You hurriedly shake your head, and his smile widens. 

“Then I guess we better occupy that mouth of yours.” 

-- 

It’s a risk that you never would’ve taken in Sc(ai)le’s offices. Those hadn’t been even remotely private—if anyone had walked past when you and Bateman were there before, they would’ve seen you. Now, unless someone knocks on your door and comes in, no one will know. 

Still, your position doesn’t exactly inspire confidence. If any one walked in now, they’d see Nathan’s bare ass, and your hands grasping his hips as he thrusts into your mouth. 

Your hold on him is fairly futile. With his hand on the crown of your head, you have little range of motion. You’re hardly moving, just holding your mouth open as he thrusts roughly between your lips. Your eyes water as you peer up at him, as you watch his tongue swipe across his lips, his gaze dark as he watches you. He shoves his hips forward harder still, and you struggle to recoil as you gag, as he keeps your head locked in position. He finally lets up, and you sway backward, coughing roughly as you swipe to clear away the spit that’s leaked along the sides of your lips. You watch Nathan chuckle, grasping his slickened shaft. Your thighs twitch, sending a tingling through your wet, neglected cunt. Before he can ask—before he can demand it, or say a word, you kneel up again, taking the head of his cock between your lips. He huffs out a soft laugh, hips twitching before his hand smoothed over your cheek, thumb sweeping across your cheekbone.

“Yeah,” He coos, “I missed you, too, sweetheart.” 

You groan, sinking your nails into the meat of his thigh as you swipe your tongue along the veined underside. 

-- 

“You hungry?” 

You don’t answer right away, and maybe that’s why he presses, “Hey.” You feel him sweep his hand along your naked lower back. It makes you sag even deeper into the mattress. “You alright?”

You draw in a deep breath, leaving your eyes closed as you consider. You are aching, and sated. You feel fucked-out, and cozy, and…

“Yeah,” You finally mumble, though it’s a herculean effort. Your tongue feels heavy, and your lips feel oddly…Gluey. “I could eat.” 

You feel the bed dip, and hear the sound of his feet padding across his bedroom floor. It’s chased by the rumble of a drawer opening, and you wince as it’s then slammed shut. You roll onto your belly from your side, turning your head from the thud as another drawer is opened. You feel the bed dip again a moment later. 

“Here,” He urges, dropping some clothes within reach. “Should’ve stopped by yours to get some clothes.” 

“...Mmm.”

You hear him chuckle, and feel his hand on your cheek. 

“Open your eyes for me.” 

You finally do, blinking up at him where he’s leaning against the headboard. It shouldn’t be such a warm sight, considering the struggle in your office, but a tired smile unwittingly pulls at your lips. 

“Do we have water?” You mumble. 

“No. I’m a billionaire without access to water.” 

“Shut up,” You groan, pushing yourself back onto your back and squinting up at the harsh lighting. “What time is it, anyway?” 

“Almost nine.” 

“...In the..?” 

“Evening.” 

“Mm.” 

“Here.” 

You look up as you hear the crisp crack of a water bottle being opened. You push yourself back just a little, settling your head on his thigh and taking hold of the proffered bottle and cap. 

“Don’t spill it,” He mutters. 

“I won’t.” Probably. Maybe you will, just to spite him. God knows how many bedrooms he has, you can probably find somewhere else to sleep. You draw in a greedy gulp, then another. It’s so cool; you didn’t realize how thirsty you were. 

“Slow down,” Nathan counsels boredly as he takes his phone up from the bedside table. “You start choking on it, I’m just gonna laugh.” 

“You usually laugh when I choke,” You mumble, lowering the water. He huffs softly, nodding. 

“That’s true. What do you wanna eat?” 

“I don’t know. What do you have here?” 

“I’m gonna order something.” 

“Oh.” You think for a moment before you tip your head back to look at him. “What are you hungry for?” 

“Think we both know what I’m hungry for.” 

“That’s not hot, it just sounds cannibalistic.” 

“Don’t get too close to my phone, Clarice.” 

“Fuck, your Hopkins needs work.” 

“So?” 

“Grilled cheese,” You finally decide, closing your eyes again. “With bacon and tomato.” 

“‘Kay.” 

“And a chocolate milkshake.” 

“Alright.” 

“And fries.” 

“Thought the fries were implied.” 

“Just confirming.” 

“Cheese fries or regular fries?” 

“Mmm…Regular.” 

“Drink your water.” 

You raise your hand obediently, taking another few sips. You hear Nathan set his phone down on the bedside table after a few moments. 

“You wanna get cleaned up?” He asks, smoothing his fingers down your throat. 

“Not yet.” 

“Alright.” 

You feel Nathan’s hand rest over your throat for a moment before he lets his touch drift lower. 

“Should see if I have a turtleneck in here,” He comments. 

“Why?” 

“You’re bruising.” 

You open your eyes, surprised as you wave toward your throat. He nods, smoothing his knuckles gently along the sides of your neck. You bite your lip, considering. 

“Was I too rough?” He asks. 

You shake your head. 

“You sure?” 

You nod. 

“I need to hear it,” He insists. You huff softly, capping the water and setting aside. You push yourself up on slightly shaky arms before pressing yourself into Nathan’s side. It seems like his arm curls around your waist on instinct as you nuzzle against his neck. 

“You weren’t too rough,” You murmur. “Okay? If I’d wanted you to stop, I would’ve told you to.” 

You feel Nathan nod slightly, his hand splaying on your waist. You close your eyes, resting against him. 

“Maybe we should establish a safeword, though,” You offer after a moment. 

“Sure. Jenn.” 

“What?” 

“The safeword.” 

You reel away, socking Nathan in the shoulder as he grins smugly at you. It’s a stupid decision—your head spins from moving too fast. You rest that same hand on Nathan’s shoulder to steady yourself as you grumble, “That is not even remotely funny.” 

“C’mere,” Nathan urges. “You’re gonna make yourself sick, moving like that.” 

“Your fault,” You mumble, though you cuddle up against him again. 

“Uh-huh.” Nathan turns his head, nuzzling against your hair. 

“...Crypto,” You finally say. 

“You want your safeword to be crypto?” 

“Yeah.” 

“Why?” 

“Because I hate it and it’s something I’ll remember.” 

Nathan snorts a laugh before you feel him nod. 

“Crypto it is.” He smooths his hand up your back, rubbing in small circles. You let your eyes slip shut again, allowing yourself to relax as the pressure in your head drops away. It’s strange. Even when you and Nathan fucked around before, it wasn’t quite like this. Sure, you had moments when he’d keep close, or when you didn’t get up right away, but you never made an effort to cuddle up, and he never made it a point to keep you this close. He used to relish in your discomfort, not try to lessen it. 

It’s almost frightening how long it took for you to shut him out during your time at BlueBook, and how quickly you let him back in. It took one evening for him to unravel you, beyond the bounds of your prior…What could you call it? Association? Relationship? 

“Drink your water,” He urges again. You shift a little reluctantly, leaning away from him to take hold of the bottle before leaning against him again. You yawn widely as you unscrew the cap, taking another few sips. You hold it up questioningly, and Nathan takes it, drawing in his own gulp before pressing it back into your hands. 

--  

He hovers. 

Maybe it shouldn't be such a surprise, considering how depleted you were before you got out of bed, but you never expected Nathan to be the type to…Hover. You can feel him watching you as you settle on a seat at his kitchen island, resting your chin on your hand and fighting back a yawn. You can hear him unpacking the food, popping the containers lids before pushing a few over toward you. 

“Here,” He urges. “Sit up.” 

“Ugh,” You groan, pushing yourself and opening your eyes. “Is there a straw for the milkshake?” 

Nathan pokea through the bag for a moment before he throws one toward you. You flinch, fumbling to catch it before ripping off the wrapping and jabbing it into the lid. 

“Thanks.” 

“Mm.” 

You pull in a taste, shoulders wiggling with joy as the sweetness sweeps across your tongue. You reach out, opening the container and picking up a couple of fries. You glance over as Nathan leans against the counter across from you. 

“What’d you get?” You ask, nodding toward him. 

“Veggie burger.” 

You hum, popping the fries between your lips. You have to fight the urge to cram a few more in before you’ve even finished chewing. You didn’t even realize how hungry you were. 

“Still having second thoughts?” Bateman asks. You frown, and he clarifies: “About this week.” 

You press your lips into a thin line as you consider. You pop the lid off the milkshake, dipping one of the fries inside and swirling it around. 

“Not in the same way,” You admit. 

“What’s still tripping you up?” 

“...I never told Jenn.” 

You can feel Nathan’s gaze as you reach for half of your grilled cheese. 

“Never told Jenn what?” He asks. 

“Anything, about, you know. This.” 

“You need to?” 

“No! No, not need, no,” You shake your head, “But…I’m a shit friend, you know. She likes you.” 

It’s not fair to tip her hand like this, without her knowledge, but there’s no way that Bateman doesn’t know this by now, right? Still, it’s a moment before he lets out a grunt. 

“What?” You sigh. 

“Nothing.” 

“It’s clearly something.” 

“She didn’t tell you.”

“Didn’t tell me what?” 

“Remember when I said that I found someone else to fuck?” 

It’s like he’s dumped a bucket of water over your head. You freeze mid-chew, gobsmacked, your heart dropping into your stomach as Bateman reaches out, snagging a few of your fries as if he didn’t just turn your world upside. 

“...Uh…” You shake your head, “I didn’t—I had no—When?” 

“I don’t know, last year?” 

Last year. You shake your head a little, trying to knock a response loose. 

“Wu—uh…When?” 

“After your party.” 

“The party where you asked me to come stay with you for a week?”

“Yeah. But you didn’t, so.” 

“So you fucked Jenn because I didn’t fuck you.” 

“I fucked Jen when you didn’t fuck me. You weren’t the implicit cause. That make you feel better?” 

“A little, yeah, I guess. But that doesn’t uh—weird feeling. This is a weird feeling.” 

“I’m a little surprised she didn’t tell you.” 

“Yeah. Yeah, me, too.” 

You reach for the milkshake, slugging back a gulp and wincing as brain freeze sets in. 

“You gonna get all weird about it?” Nathan asks. 

“I’m not—No. No, I’m not making this weird. I’m not gonna let this get weird. We’re gonna fuck.” 

“If you’re sure.” 

“All week, I mean we are gonna do it. A lot,” You insist, pointing at him. Nathan’s lips twitch in amusement. 

“Alright,” He concedes, holding his hands up, “Jeez. Long as you leave it attached.” 

“...Did you ever mention this to her?” You ask, waving between the two of you again. 

“No.” 

“Okay.” 

“Are you going to?” 

“If I do, I’ll give you a heads up.” 

“Whatever.” 

“Was it just the one time?” 

“Yeah.” 

“Okay.”

That shouldn’t make you feel superior or good, but…Well, it kinda does. You and Jenn haven’t had a tug of war over Nathan, per se, not personally. It sounds like what they had was a one night stand than a real relationship. 

Still, it’s her business, and her…Business. 

“Cut it out.” 

“What?” You blink, frowning. 

“I can see the smoke coming out of your ears.” 

“Oh—Shut up,” You gripe, throwing a fry at him. He smiles, picking it up from where it lands limply on the counter. 

“So?” He asks, “Are you staying?” 

-- 

The two of you don’t spend the entire time in bed. It’s just not physically possible, and the two of you do need breaks every now and again. Neither of you can draw yourself entirely away from work, either. You manage to contain it. You don’t let it creep into the rest of the house. You make a little space for yourself in his office, curling up in the corner of the couch and hunching over your screen and keyboard. Your time off is approved, but you still answer a few emails a day, and dial into a few status calls, just to keep up to date with what’s going on with your team. Nathan spends a fair bit of time working, too. You’re fascinated by the wall practically papered in post-its, even more fascinated still as you actually watch him work. 

For all of Bateman’s pointed teasing and distraction while you worked with one another at Sc(ai)le, he has laser-focus when he’s working on BlueBook. You don’t take the same pains to annoy him as he had with you. You’re too interested in the way that he iterates, how he conducts himself when speaking to other staff members, how he occasionally mutters to himself as he makes notes. While you’re working, it’s like you’re hardly there. He’ll catch your eye every now and again, but for the most part, he leaves you to your own devices. A time or two, when you’re dialing into the same meeting, Nathan dials in and brings his phone over to the couch so that the two of you can listen in together. 

You shift closer to him when he does, sitting side by side. Whenever Nathan unmutes, you’re careful to keep completely silent. You don’t want anyone to get even a hint that you’re there. It’s not against any company policy, but my god, it would set the team’s tongues wagging. 

After one such call, Nathan hangs up, pitching the phone into the other end of the couch and grunting, “Fuckin’ idiots.” 

You can’t help but smile. 

“You do know that I’m still here, right?” You ask. 

“You think I forgot?” Nathan turns to look at you, brows raising, “You gonna tell ‘em?” 

“What?”

“You gonna tell ‘em that I think they’re fuckin’ idiots?” He shifts toward you. You shrug, turning back to your laptop and reopening the email that you’d been drafting before the call. 

“Probably not.” 

“Oh, probably not.” 

“Freedom of speech.” 

“Freedom of speech protects you from the government, sweetheart. Not from me.” 

“I don’t need anyone to protect me from you.” 

“No?” 

“Nn-nn.” 

“You sure about that?” 

Before you can answer, Nathan snaps your laptop shut and tosses it to the floor. 

“Are you crazy?” You screech as Nathan climbs over you, steering you back onto the couch. You give his chest a shove, but it hardly moves him as he crowds against you. His hands skim up your sides, and you can’t help but grin and squirm against him as his lips cover yours. 

You think that time must be mellowing him. You’ve been with Nathan for three days straight, and you can’t help but notice a few…Differences. It goes well beyond the hovering. 

He hasn’t kissed you so much since that first night. Nathan seems to almost delight in your kisses now. He takes his time slotting himself between your legs, spreading your thighs wide as his tongue spears past your smiling lips. He doesn’t hurry things along as he used to—though in fairness, these days, you have far more time than you used to. You’re not cuddling up in some dark corner, wary of being seen, or caught. You’re not hurrying out of bed, covering up as quickly as possible and shooing him out to scrub the sweat from your skin. 

He doesn’t turn you, shove you into the wall, into the mattress, into the backseat of his car. Now, face to face, he tugs your panties aside and eases his sweatpants down just far enough to draw out his hardened cock, and ease it into your slick, aching pussy. The two of you groan against one another’s lips as he sheathes himself fully inside you. You raise your hands, cupping his cheeks and swirling your tongue along his as he plants his knees against the cushions to gain purchase. 

Nathan reaches down and hikes your shirt up as your hips press together. You shiver as he ducks his head, his beard brushing harshly over your pebbling nipple before he takes it into his mouth. 

“Fuck, Nate,” You moan, fingers hooking in the fabric of his shirt. He hums, teasing the nipple lightly with his teeth before he draws back. His kisses trail up your neck, brushing over your throat. 

“Your bruises are starting to fade,” He murmurs. 

“Oh?” 

“Mm.” 

“Are you gonna fix that?” 

Nathan leans up, grinning. 

“Maybe later, baby.” 

You reach up, shoving at his chest and urging, “Up, get up.”

Nathan shifts back, sitting on the end of the couch and pushing off his sweatpants. You draw your top off and kick away your panties before you clamber onto his lap. You steady a hand on his shoulder, reaching down and grasping his length before easing down onto it. You whine softly as you settle into his lap, as he slides his hands up your back and draws you close. You lean into him, resting your forehead against his as you begin to roll your hips. 

“Come on,” Nathan urges, “You can do better than that.” 

You laugh a little, resting your hands on the back of the couch. 

“I’m doing exactly what I want.” 

“I want more.”

“Well that’s too damn ba—ad! Fuck!” You whimper as he grasps your hips, steadying you and snapping his hips up harshly. Your mouth falls open as he takes control of the pace, fucking up into you almost punishingly. 

“Nathan, goddamnit,” You breathe as his fingers press more hardly into your hips. 

“You close?” He murmurs. 

“N-no.” 

“Too bad.” 

“What do you—mean, oh, you piece of shit,” You whine as Nathan tips his head back, his hips jolting harshly as he spills into you. You reach down to play with your clit, but Nathan shoves your hand away and pushes your hips up. You frown, confused as Nathan slips down, then grin as he shoves the coffee table back. He sends it scattering as he slides down and lowers himself to sit on the floor, resting his head on the cushion and dragging your hips down to his lips. Your fingers flex in the fabric of the cushion as you peer down at Nathan. His tongue swipes across your cunt before he gives your lips a sucking kiss. Your hips quiver as he swipes his tongue against your tingling clit. You grind greedily against his questing tongue and lips, chasing your pleasure. 

“Almost,” You warn. Nathan hums against you, hurriedly lapping his tongue against your clit and grasping your hips to draw you even closer. A stunned moan leaves you as he sucks your clit, lashing his tongue against it until you’re shaking, hips rabbiting against him. Nathan moans, tipping his head to and fro and nuzzling your tender flesh as you ride out your orgasm. You push yourself off of him, flopping back onto the couch. It takes Nathan a moment to push himself up, and you groan as he drops himself on top of you. 

“Noooo,” You groan, “Get off’a me.” 

“Why.” 

“I’m all hot and sticky.” 

“I know.” 

“So are you.” 

“I know,” Nathan grins, nuzzling up against you and pressing closer. You whine, kicking your feet irritatedly.

“You’re awful,” You mumble, looping your arms around his shoulders regardless. He grunts, peppering your neck with tender kisses. 

“I know that, too.” 

-- 

“I’m going to have to tell her.” 

“Have to?” 

You meet Nathan’s eye in the mirror as you dab foundation over the newly blooming bruises on your neck. 

“Have to,” You nod. 

Nathan leans in the doorway of the bathroom, watching you closely. He seems to be considering it before he nods a little. 

“Alright.” 

“Are you okay with—” 

“Yes.” 

“Okay.” 

“What are you going to tell her?” 

“That…That we fuck.” 

“Okay.” 

“What else would I tell her?” 

“No, that’s accurate. I was just curious.” 

“We can talk about the verbiage—”

“We fuck,” He agrees. “It’s fine.” 

“Okay,” You nod, directing your gaze back toward the mirror and pumping some more foundation onto your beauty blender. 

“That what you’re going in?” 

You glance down toward your outfit—your jeans, and one of Nathan’s t-shirts. 

“Yeah,” You shrug. “We’re just grabbing bagels, nothing fancy.” 

“Are you gonna be long?” 

“Jeez,” You laugh. “No, dad.” 

“Hey,” He pushes off of the door frame, sauntering closer. “We’ve only got a couple more days here. I’m heading back soon.” 

“I know.” 

“So?” 

“So I told you, I won’t be long.” 

“Good.” 

“You’re such a big baby,” You mumble as Nathan cuddles up against your back. You smile as his hands smooth over your hips and belly. 

“You’re a goody two-shoes that can’t lie to people.” 

“Yeah, god forbid I have a conscience. I’m really not coming up with the short end of the stick here.” 

“You aren't coming up with the short end of anything,” Nathan murmurs, rolling his hips against you. You snort, swatting back at him. 

“Cut it out, you perv. I’m gonna be late.” 

-- 

“...Are you going to say anything?”

You don’t think she will for a few long moments. Jenn’s expression is frighteningly unreadable. She roughly swallows the large bite of bagel that she'd taken before she clears her throat, setting the bagel back down. 

“Let me get this straight,” She leans back in her seat. “You have spent the last…What, three and a half years telling me, swearing up and down that you hate him—” 

“I think ‘swearing’ is a little strong—” 

“—And now you’re telling me that you’ve been fucking him? For a year?”

“...Ish,” You nod, “It’s, um…Maybe closer to a year and a half. Although—That’s elapsed, if we went by the amount of time we actually spent, it’s probably closer to…Six months?” 

“Oh, if it’s elapsed.” 

“Yeah.” 

“Well that makes it sooo much better.” 

“Yeah, I thought it—...You’re being sarcastic.” 

“God, you’re so smart.” 

“Look, Jenn, I know this seems kinda bad on the face of it—” 

“It doesn’t seem bad. It is bad.” 

“I’m sorry.” 

“Well, that makes me feel much better.” 

“I didn’t mean to—” 

“You knew that I liked him!” 

“...Yeah,” You lower your gaze to your untouched food. “I did. What I did was shitty, I’m not pretending it’s not. I should’ve told you after the first time it happened, and it shouldn’t have happened again. Frankly, it…It probably shouldn’t have happened at all.” 

Jenn pushes a sigh through her nose as she raises her hands, scrubbing them over her face. 

“Do you like him?” She asks after a few moments. 

“What’s that got to do with anything?” 

She shoots you a disbelieving look as she lowers her hands, and you hold your own up in concession. 

“I think, it’s just…” You consider for a few moments. “When it started, it was…Angry. I was angry, I was mad at him, and the sex kinda worked some of that out. I’m not mad at him like that anymore. I’m not even angry about that entire situation anymore, I’m…I guess I like him,” You finally concede. “Not like-like—Christ, I sound like a teenager, I just mean, um…” You shake your head. “We’ve reached…An amicable place.” 

“And that place is his bed?” 

You bite back a laugh as you nod a little bit, “Sometimes.” You watch Jenn for a few moments, taking in the furrow of her brow and the thin press of her lips. “How pissed are you?” 

“...I’m not gonna pretend I’m happy about it.” 

“I’m not asking you to.” 

“You should’ve told me.” 

“I know. I honestly didn’t think it would keep happening, but it did.” 

“Even now?” 

“...Yeah.” 

“Wow.” 

“Sorry.” 

Jenn huffed a stunned laugh, shaking her head. 

“I need to process this.” 

“I totally get that. Take your time.” 

“Gee, thanks for your permission.” 

“That’s not what I meant.” 

“...Are you wearing his shirt?”

-- 

“You wanna talk about it?” 

“Not really.” 

“Talk about it anyway.” 

You roll your eyes, looking down at Nathan. His chin is resting on your belly, smoothing his hands along your thighs. You sigh softly, shifting slightly under him.

“It could’ve been worse,” You concede. “She didn’t, like…Flip, but she wasn’t happy about it. Obviously.” 

“Didn’t think she would be.” 

“No, me neither.” 

“Well thanks, Mr. Smarty Pants.” You sigh, smoothing your hand over his head and honing in on the feeling of the his buzzed hair against your palm. “I’m gonna have to give her space for a while.” 

“She ask you to?” 

“No, but when Jenn is mad like this, she needs…Time. She comes back to me, not the other way around. I can’t push.”  

“What if she doesn’t come back?” 

Maybe he means it as a harmless hypothetical, but the prospect makes you feel queasy. It’s a thought that you’ve been grappling with all afternoon, that had caused tears to prickle in your eyes as you’d driven back to Bateman’s place. You shake your head wordlessly, swallowing thickly and directing your gaze toward the ceiling. 

“Okay,” He concedes. You smooth your hand down to his nape, letting your eyes close as you draw in a deep breath. It’s strange to find comfort in the way Nathan covers your body with his and nuzzles into your neck. He shouldn’t be so sweet with you, not after everything that the two of you have been done. But he cuddles close nonetheless, taking your hands in his and settling into silence. 

--  

“You gonna miss me?” 

He is teasing now. You glance up from your laptop as you sit on Nathan’s bed, watching him sort through his dresser drawers and draw out a few items to pack for his trip home. 

“...Yeah,” You admit after a few moments. “I think I am, a little bit.” 

He casts a surprise glance over his shoulder. 

“You can always come up and see me.” 

“After the week off I just took? No, I don’t think I always can.” 

“Figure of speech.” 

“Inaccurate.” 

“You gonna cry when I take off? Throw yourself onto the tarmac in front of the jet?” 

“Oh, yeah. I’m gonna actually stay here, waste away in this bed without you.” 

Nathan turns toward you again, tossing a shirt in the direction of the duffel bag before he climbs onto the bed beside you. 

“Close it,” He urges. 

“Almost done here.” 

“Close it now.” 

“If you shut it on my fingers and throw it again, I’m gonna punch you in the nards.” 

Nathan snorts, sliding down against the headboard and resting his head on your shoulder. You can’t help but smile at the warmth and weight of him beside you, and the way he repositions his head to get more comfortable. You finally finish your email before you make a big show of closing the laptop and setting it aside. 

“Can I help you?” 

Nathan turns his head, nudging his nose against your neck. 

“You could stay here,” He offers. 

“I like my place. Besides, I don’t have any of my shit here. I’ve been wearing your clothes, like, all week.” 

“I know. Looks good.” 

You smile, shaking your head. 

“I don’t wanna stick around when you’re not here, Nathan.” 

“And if I am around?” 

“...Might be nice,” You shrug, looking down at your discarded laptop. “But you’re not around much.” 

“That could change.” 

Your stomach flips at the assertion, and as Nathan looks up at you, you force a neutral expression. 

“If it’s in the best interest of the company, then sure, I guess,” You excuse. You finally chance a glance toward Nathan, and find him watching you closely. 

“...I’d like it,” You admit softly. Nathan nods, murmuring, “Alright.” 

You nod, looking down at your lap. You'd said three little words, but they feel so dangerous. Your nerves turn to the fluttering of butterflies as he presses a tender kiss to your jaw. 

“You’re just adorable,” Nathan murmurs, and you grin at the mocking sincerity in his tone. 

“Yeah, well. You’re short.”

Tag list: @missredherring; @fantasticcopeaglepasta ;  @massivecolorspygiant ; @blueeyesatnight; @amneris21 ; @ew-erin ; @youngkenobilove ; @carbonated-beverage ; @lorecraft ; @moonlightburned ; @milf-trinity ; @nolanell ; @millllenniawrites ; @chattychelsea ; @dihra-vesa ; @videogamesandpoorlifechoices​ ; @missswriter ; @thembosapphicclown ; @brandyllyn ; @wildmoonflower ; @buckybarneshairpullingkink ; @mad-girl-without-a-box ; @winchestershiresauce ; @aellynera ; @writefightandflightclub ; @thedukeofcaladan ; @beepboopyoda ; @foxilayde ; @revolution-starter ; @rachelwritesstuff ; @queen-of-elves

[sanctus-ingenium]

have you had any luck finding another place to sell your prints? srry if you get this ask a lot

Putting this one separately because it's a bit of an inprnt update - I contacted them, they responded saying that the delayed payments were apparently a paypal issue (doubt.png). They cancelled my withdrawal request and remade it and then within 10 working days I did in fact get the $186 they owed me.

The big test is next week, on the 13th of September I'll make my final withdrawal of the rest of my account balance. If I don't get that in a timely manner I'm done with inprnt until there is solid evidence their service has improved. If I do get that in a timely manner I will consider reopening my shop.

That is all contingent on whether or not people are actually getting the imprnt prints they ordered. If you bought one when I announced the closing of my shop, please let me know if/when you get the print and if it is of satisfactory quality. That will help me decide how to move forwards.

Anyway to actually answer the ask: not really, sorry.

[selfindulgentraptor]

Now that GITD Barnaby is safe and in my hands I have a confession to finally make: I own a bootleg Barnaby plush

LET ME PREFACE!! in saying I will not disclose where I bought it, nor condone the purchase of any bootleg BBU plush. I didn't know it was a bootleg when I purchased it, and made sure to get an official one to properly support the game. If you want one, please get it official or custom/hand made so you can support the game instead of greedy no good people!*

That said, this provides a unique opportunity to compare the differences in quality between both:

Keep in mind, from what I've seen online there's many Barnaby bootleg variations and this only represents the one I have. Obv the colours are different too since the official one is the GITD version

The differences:

HE'S WAY BIGGER?

is less firmly stuffed

official has higher quality fabric

knife is printed on thinner/lower quality felt

no velcro (the knife is glued to his foot)

has lost some definition in the feathers on the tail and especially the wings

legs are spread wider apart

head uses a different pattern, official is more square and bootleg is more round and tapered at the bottom

mouth and eyebrow stitching is light grey instead of purple

eye stitching is generally a lot looser (at one point it threaded out a little bit on the bottom right when I accidentally nicked it with my fingernail)

tongue stitching attaches the tongue to the cheek on the official, tongue hangs loose on the bootleg

vest is printed on instead of being a separate fabric piece (also notice how the bootleg has weird black triangles cut out of the purple? Looks like they didn't realize those were Barnaby's talons when referencing the product photo:)

bootleg feathers on the legs are pointy, while the official's are rounded

bootleg bowtie is two purple pieces glued loosely together, while official's has proper seams.

barnaboo is missing its arms

Now if you're looking at this and thinking that's not so bad then know that my bootleg actually came looking like this:

His left horn was mismatched and actually a third wing! I spent time reconstructing the wing into a horn using the existing material.

I later used the extra wing fabric to mod him with a fourth back digit, since it makes him more accurate to the official model

this guy brought me some comfort as I waited for the official one to come in. So "Barby" will continue to be cared for despite his shameful origins. But this is a sad state for a bootleg to come in. Safe to say you shouldn't have to fix your own plush upon arrival. And despite that this was probably a better one, considering this one is relatively well made compared to other variations I've seen online. Quality control is a gamble when it comes to these bootlegs. Do not recommend!

*On top of everything, recently one of the bootleg manufacturers counter-sued BBU over having their listings taken down, which is super gross. It's more difficult for smaller independent projects like BBU to fight against copyright infringement. So please don't purchase from or support these bootleg products!!

[teamliftfest]

Fanart offerings 🎉

Hello everyone! Your mods thought we'd highlight some of the non-traditional offerings to showcase some of the incredibly cool offerings our community has up for auction for the next couple of days. Keep an eye out!

We're splitting fanart offerings into multiple posts because there are a couple different fanart mediums. Today we're highlighting graphics and a zine! These are fanart offerings that are not digital drawings or paintings.

Usernames link to their bidding pages - check out their linked portfolios for examples of what they are offering!

fir juergenklopp is offering two auctions for gifsets/graphics: "Gifsets/graphics, see portfolio. Can be generally ship related or inspired by written fics. open to anything I can find video footage to work with!"

talahu'i is offering coordinating/complementary lockscreen/phone backgrounds, fic/podfic covers, or a multi-image poetry/song edit: "I'm offering to make coordinating/complementary lockscreen/phone backgrounds (2 sets for a total of 4), up to 4 fic/podfic covers, or a multi-image poetry/song edit [...] Depending on how well I know the player, I may pull from specific games/seasons or go with a photo that fits the aesthetic. Sometimes I'll include real quotes/articles, so also let me know if you prefer not including."

Frobby is offering a poetry edit: "If you have a specific poem or poet in mind, please include that in your prompt. Otherwise either give me: a player / a theme / a team / an event to focus on. NHL wide poems are also an option if you have a specific theme / poem in mind."

Malter is offering a zine: "A zine in any A-series size (A4, A5, etc), delivered both as a fully digital version and a high quality, print-ready file you can take to your local print shop or assemble at home! [...] My zines consist of mostly collages and graphic design explorations with typography and colour, and can be about anything—a ship, a specific athlete, a league, whatever you want."

[cathalbravecog]

Hi! I'm kinda shy but I love your vintage finish on your work. Would you consider offering pointers for how to achieve that vibe?

oh, absolutely!! i love that sort of style and i think more people should be able to achieve it if they want!! shouldn't gatekeep art stuff ^^ i don't really do vintage style stuff a lot, and i take more comic book/print/retro inspo than anything. but, these go hand in hand!! please know i am still learning, too! this is just how i do it.

also, there's a lot of guides for this online and tools... that you have to purchase. i can assure you everything listed here is free! (including my pirated SAI2 copy!) some things have donations available towards the artists that made them, so you can do that if you want to support an artist :D

i'll go over basically everything i know, so this WILL get long! i also spent hours going over several days searching for resources, so i'll list everything so you don't have to ^^

(PART 1/2 BECAUSE OF IMAGE LIMITATIONS!!! PART 2 SHOULD BE WRITTEN SOON AFTER THIS ONE!! reblog THAT once it's done!)

-------------------------------------------------------------

THE ART ITSELF / INSPIRATIONS:

for the ARTSTYLE and WHAT you draw: you can just draw whatever!! really, do your own thing! twist this style in your own way, it doesn't have to be a 100% accurate!! i literally used these same vintage look effects in a drawing drawn in my usual style of high roller. you can draw anything you want and you don't need to copy comicbook styles or all that!!

or - you CAN take inspo from vintage comic books / artwork or other printed comics! (for me tom and jerry comes to mind as something with a toony style, since it's what i read as a kid. also donald duck comics! no need to follow this but if you wanna be extra you can! ^^ looking at inspo is good.)

however you will need to look at examples aside from just the Artstyle, to achieve the actual Look!!

here's some examples pics i took of some comics i own laying around in a shelf. these are mixed ages, the asterix and ducktales comics being older and the tom and jerry comic being newer. i have some oldies since i got them passed down! czech text + asterix jumpscare, sorry.

to move on from the artstyle talk fully and more to the general style/look part - notice how the tom and jerry has brighter colors, less dirt, and an overall better quality!!

one thing i want you to note, in older prints there's obvious color misprinting and imperfections! you may chose to do this, or don't! depends what kind of era or printing you wanna reference. of course, also keep in mind the veeery limited CYMK colors they had Back In The Day. also note the dirt!!! how some parts are lighter and more chipped and how it isn't a full block of color!!

a lot of this does parrot posessedpasm's own guide, which i HIGHLY recommend! it's where i got a jump-start on things. there's other things listed on their post, which you should give a read! goes over history of some things that will let you have a better understanding of stuff.

speaking of inspo and on the topic of posessedpasm, before we move on - they're one of my biggest inspirations for this! their art is incredible and i think it's important to look at other artists' take on these styles. go out there and look at other artists who draw in a similar style achieving the same retro look!!! (no but genuinely i could look at posessedpasm's art forever... i love just looking at it and studying it!! i want what they have... but i'm not gonna gush now!)

-----------------------------------------------------------------

ACTUAL TECHNICALITIES / HOW THE FUCK DO I DO IT ???:

FIRST, LINEART!!: i choose a brush that's somewhat fluttery and resembles ink at least a little bit, instead of a basic round brush. here's the brush i used, for any sai2 users. i'll show my krita faves after!!

(note brush size, gets fuzzier the bigger it is)

and the krita alternatives! i don't do inking / lineart in krita in 99.9% of my art unless i'm experimenting. but there's some great brushes you can find online to use! here's links to the ones on screen

tomb of null

buck a. brush

ramonm inktober (he just presents it but since it's his post i named it that) (download link is on the video!)

that alone already gets the lineart look just a bit. but it's not all! krita is especially useful for this, as sai doesn't have this function. (but i find my way around it

here's a WIP screenshot i took while drawing that piece VS the final piece!

you may notice the lineart is "chipped" away in some spots. printing always wasn't perfect and created some imperfections, that may smudge and chip away as time goes on.

HERE'S A GUIDE FOR IMITATING THAT!!!!

what i do, is simply create a clipping layer on the lineart. (typically i do the lineart, then color, THEN do lineart effects, but this is just for show) (i also usually have a set, typically orange/yellow background color picked already, but i haven't done that here for Whatever Reason)

set it to "erase" layer mode... (and click the little "a" to actually clip it to the layer. you could also just make a quick clipping group that does it for you!)

and draw over the lineart! (preferably with a highly textured "dirty" brush!) the erase clipping layer will only erase the lineart, and nothing underneath it. you can change the opacity up and down to adjust the erasing... you can add more erase layers to play with the effect a little!

what i then do (sometimes), i ctrl+e the lineart group to one layer. i copy it. i ctrl+z to go back to keep the group if needed. i paste the copied lineart underneath it. i add a blur filter, shift it to be slightly off from the lineart by a few pixels, and set it to "burn". i may change the color to be a very dark orange-ish brownish color. gives an effect of the lineart bleeding a little!

COLORING!!:

color: okay so for this part i just kinda bullshit it and either pick whatever colors i want, or i color pick them from this image below then slightly alter if i need a different color. i do not have the patience to do my own cymk layer management digitally, just adding my effects can take OVER an hour and i have a way that looks nice Without It. i either fake my color misprints later or i just don't do it. still stuff to consider!

(taken from posessedpasm's guide! this is how i colored my sticky lou drawing. usually i will just pick my own colors and yellow them/dim them slightly.)

how do i do it: i color in sai using my usual brush or the one i showed previously. if i color on krita i use a different fuzzy kind of brush...

some colors i do on different layers and i move them slightly to make the misprinted effect. then i may erase small bits of it to make it look a bit better if i want.

if you really want the funky color mixing that may not be Extra Accurate anyway - draw using different colors on different layers. the layer overlapping with the bottom layer... set it to "multiply" and eyedrop the color where the two colors overlap. set the layer effect back to "normal". lock your opacity so you draw only on the Already Colored Parts and color the overlapping area using the eyedropped color! neato !

ONE THING TO NOTE!!! if something is white, you should leave it uncolored/transparent. unless you stylize it to be a different color entirely, if so... go ahead! but if it's WHITE white - just don't color it at all!!!

and now, to my Favorite part - the halftone overlay effect!!! here's where things can get fairly convincing already - plus, i use this effect / similar even in my normal art!

before ANYTHING!! at least, for krita - to achieve the best look i use the newspaper plugin!

newspaper plugin for krita

FIRST, i merge the color layer into one layer and then add it into a clipping group. i then copy the color layer and paste it OUTSIDE the clipping group.

then, select your PASTED color layer (named on the screenshot so u know what i mean) and go to tools>scripts>newspaper (once you install the plugin!)

i then play with the settings a bit. i typically don't touch everything - i just change the mode to Four color (CMY+K Pictures) or Four color (CMYK - Pictures) (this one usually looks better imo)

i also change the size to be smaller, usually around 4.00px.

click OK! it'll generate cymk halftone layers IN a clipping group! don't worry about the black, you can rid of it easily ;]

just close the group and move it to be inside of your color group below! clip the whole cmyk group over the color layer... and BOOM!

but that's not it! set the newspaper group's layer effect to luminosity (or whatever you find works best...!) adjust the opacity to around 50%-30% and BOOM!!

though, that's not all! do the same things we did to erase up the lineart earlier to the coloring, too. same steps! in the same clipping group! just make sure it's above the cmyk newspaper group.

you can then group both lineart groups and color groups into ANOTHER group that will contain them both. with that you can then make an erase layer over them both so they both get affected by it and make it look like both got chipped away, and not like they're separate entities. ^^

you can then use this for backgrounds... text... other things!

one important thing is also getting those papery, dirty effects... which i'll cover in a reblog! (image limit :,]) alongside that, i'll list all my resources for download there!!!

[starscelly]

for those interested in printing and creating your own zine! jpegs of the template for the hockey zine here, link to download from drive (+ more info on that) and a tutorial below!!

if you can print from somewhere that supports psd files (also in the drive) i highly recommend, to preserve the colors better (: these appear weird as rgb color profile right now but Should print properly as they'll convert to cmyk. let me know if thats not the case!

also, i'm. not charging for any of this. but instead if you're able to, please consider donating esims for gaza or in some way supporting those in palestine (even just doing your daily arab.org click!!)

again, if you have somewhere to print psd files that is what i would Highly Recommend, the colors and quality will just turn out better, i think.

here is the link to a drive folder where u will find these files as well as tutorials (both specifically for this zine and for this type of zine in general)

some further info not included/expanded on in that drive! :

this is meant to be 8x8in when laid flat (not folded) and the files there should print as such, you wont need a special printer or anything, i literally just used the normal library printer on printer paper.

you will need to cut off the edge around the printed bits as straight and close to the edge as possible, as well as the 4x4 empty square in the middle.

if you're able to line them up, you can print these back to back as they are. if you can't, or want the zine to be a little thicker, you can just print them on separate pages and glue them back to back (the way theyre currently oriented, if that makes sense) and fold it like that. that's how i did it!

there are 24 image slots, but if you want to make your own you will only make 6 images. these images will then be split up into 4 sections (theres an example of this in the tutorial folder) in order to be folded, which is why there's 24 little sections.

i would recommend folding around every square of an image before doing the Actual Final Fold, it'll be soooo much easier to manipulate it from there imo. then, once you have done the final fold, taking something and creasing around the edges of the zine on each page you flip to will help it be easier to move, as well.

also this is the video i originally used to learn to make these (but found to be a little confusing/not friendly to those making their own)

if theres anything i missed/is unclear/doesn't work, please feel free to send me an ask or message about it!!! i hope you all enjoy and make ur own zines <3

[maliwart]

We got some very nice giclée prints for our latest book project so I decided to open up preorders for prints of my art in the same quality!

I'm offering two different sizes: 8x12 inch and 12x16 inch each with a white border

How to order: follow this link to a listing in the novaandmali.com store where you can choose your size and let me know which piece you want! My entire catalogue of art is available (barring a few commercial works and private commissions)!

Preorders will be open until July 15th! Feel free to message me about any questions (but please read the info in the listing first <3)

This example print is from @shouty-y - this print is not available right now 💕

[Image ID: First image is a collage of four digital paintings, each featuring a wlw couple. The text reads "Mali's gay print preorders" in white text. Following three images: photos of shouty's giclée print of their classics but make it gay vol 1 cover. End ID]

[d-amore]

Certainly, an extraordinarily beautiful woman was a threat to Bruce Wayne.

WOOO the melissa and bruce meeting fic!!! hope you like it :3c later (maybe today maybe tomorrow) i'll post the bunnygirl and batman meeting

— Let's go, Bruce, please!

Jason pointed to the lead news in that day's newspaper: "New restaurant fronting new tree-lined street is the talk of the week." The story continued: "Probably the new darling of Gotham's elite, its main praises are the quality of its food...and the beauty of its waitresses."

— This new restaurant is getting people talking! It says here the food is great and the waitresses are beautiful! — he smiled, elbowing him — I bet it helps you forget...

— I got it, Jay — he rolled his eyes, getting up from his armchair — go get ready then. And, Alfred, you’re coming with us.

And for some reason, it was always busy. Bruce had been to many places like this in his three decades.

It was a good restaurant, the kind of place that tries really hard to please the wealthy: spacious, bright, with jazz or classical music playing in the background, always located in the most upscale part of town, something that says "hey, I have a lot of money!"

And of course, something that couldn't be missed: a waiting area with a waitress/secretary.

— Sweet mother of Jesus. Bruce Wayne? — The woman looked the customers up and down in surprise, but quickly straightened her posture — It's an honor! Table for how many?

— Table for 3, please.

— Sure, sure! — She picked up her walkie-talkie and whispered — Table for 3 by the window. It's Bruce Wayne.

He rolled his eyes; he didn't like it and, deep down, he felt like he didn't need so much attention. Another waitress appeared and led them past rich, curious eyes to a table next to a large window, right in front of the much talked about tree-lined street, one of the few in Gotham.

Jason, of course, sat as close to the street as he could. Alfred sat in front of him and Bruce at the end.

— Good morning, boys. Here's our menu — another female voice handed them the leather-bound notebooks — I'll be your waitress today, at your service!

Wayne looked up to see the girl with the melodious voice who was serving them, analyzing her from top to bottom in a matter of seconds, as quickly as he would analyze a criminal. But this time, it wasn't to know how to best approach a threat.

Unless an extraordinarily beautiful woman was a threat.

A beautiful woman with long, wavy blonde hair falling over her shoulders. A beautiful woman with skin so pale that it gave her an almost divine appearance (her skin was certainly as soft as it looked). A beautiful woman with eyes, oh, such mesmerizing eyes: smiling, honey-colored eyes that complemented her sweet appearance. A beautiful woman, and may God and the ethics councils forgive him, whom looked so stunning in that red uniform.

Certainly, an extraordinarily beautiful woman was a threat to Bruce Wayne.

— Here, my name — she handed him the little piece of paper with her name printed on it — if you need anything, just call!

— What do you recommend from here? — Jason asked, having already scanned the menu as quickly as his father had scanned the waitress.

Alfred had barely picked up his reading glasses. It was hard to compete with Master Wayne and Master Todd.

— Well, I particularly recommend the fish in shrimp sauce. Besides being delicious and coming with several side dishes, it's my mother's recipe — she smiled — I brought it with me on the trip and managed to introduce it into the menu. But, if you want to try a little bit of everything, we have an all-you-can-eat buffet on Fridays and weekends.

— You heard that, Bruce? We can...

— We'll have this fish — he decreed, firmly turning his gaze to the window — and 2 600ml waters and a 300ml coke.

— Noted, sir! I'll bring it in a few minutes!

She left, and only then did Bruce read the name of the person who had served them.

Melissa.

With quick, but well-behaved steps, the waitress finally entered the kitchen, leaning against the first available wall to process what had happened. As her heart beat faster, a group of women formed around her.

— So? What is he like?

— Lucky you!

— What did he order?

— He must be picky, right?

— Girls — she sighed, a stubborn smile on her pink lips, handing the order to a cook — he is much more handsome than in the magazines.

— Lord! — the women melted together.

— He's a dream!

— I wish I had a rich and mysterious boyfriend!

— If he were mine, I would never work again in my life!

Definitly, Bruce Wayne was an event wherever he went.

— Girls — another waitress came in laughing, pulling a cart with dirty dishes — you should have seen how much he stared at Mel! It looked like he was going to propose right there!

— WHAT? — they shouted in unison.

— No, no, guys! — she waved her hands, as red as her uniform — Thaís, you must have seen things! He's too much sand for my little truck! — she crossed her arms — besides, he for sure would prefer a model over a waitress.

— I don't know... we're talking about the unpredictable prince of Gotham, after all.

— And he's never be shown with a girlfriend!

— Only with hookups! Maybe you have a small chance!

— Stop! Stop that! — She picked up a tray, without really thinking about why she needed to pick it up — before I start seeing things where there aren't any!

— Here's the bill you asked for — she handed him the note — the cashier is right there. How was the food?

— Delicious! — Jason exclaimed.

— True, very good — Alfred agreed, stacking the plates as he usually did.

— Oh, sir, you don’t have to do thi-

— Wonderful — Bruce stood up, a bright smile on his face. God, he was a tower. — Miss Melissa, would you please follow me to the cashier?

— Huh? Um, however you wish... — they walked to the small line — ...but... if I may ask, why-

— How long have you been living in Gotham? — He took a wad of cash out of his wallet and began counting it. Melissa couldn't help but stare intently.

— About... 5 years, I think.

— Here's a tip for serving us so well — he handed her part of the wad, a shine of shyness appearing in his eyes — if I come back here, would you continue to be my waitress?

She didn't know exactly how to answer.

[java-dragon]

Covers Bookbinding for beginners by a beginner- The Home Stretch

*drinks half a gallon of coffee*

COVERS!

You've gotten your typeset done for the fic, you've battled the demon that is your printer, folded pages, stitched pages, glued pages, glued end pages, and end bands. Made the cover, covered the cover in potentially homemade book cloth.

Now it's time to design a cover.

It's time to make this thing into a fully functioning book and slide it on your shelf and have a nice bout of "Laying on the Floor while Questioning the Human Condition (TM)".

There are a few options.

It depends on what you want.

I can only take you so far with Cricut/vinyl applications. But I researched enough to maybe, MAYBE give you the run down on at least how to get your cover from Canva to the software to cut out your vinyl. I'll start there since this is what I know the least.

Open up your version of Canva.

Make a document, I've seen some fanbinders make all this in the cricut software but I can only smile and nod along. But for me- this is the best I've figured:

go to the search bar and type in book cover (or use the drop down menu) click on a random template.

Fiddle and fart your way into a design you like. Text and Font Options are available in drop down menus and find some designs that are "Easy to Weed" which I understand as "Getting rid of all the stuff that's not going on the cover".

For Example:

Do you like it? It took me 40 seconds, I'm very proud of it. But this isn't to impress you really I just need to show you how to save your file so you can make the leap from one software application to the next.

Hit "Share", Hit "Download", File Type- Hit the down arrow, Hit "PNG" I missed this for the first few times--- BUT!

Click the "Transparent Background"

If you're doing more than one colour Vinyl you're going to duplicate the page that is located right next to the lock icon above the document. Hit that. Delete the stuff that you want to be different colours. Otherwise it will just cut everything out as one colour and I've seen some vinyl covers that get damn fancy.

You can also build a title cover just measure the spine and height of your spine and rotate your text to horizontal if you please.

Now for how I do mine. I use Printable Iron On Vinyl. Keynote there is a difference, there is stuff for light fabrics, and stuff for dark. Choose for what your primary book cloth will be but the paper itself will be white.

Make your design.

I have 3 different covers for Celestial Navigation by Sabrecmc just because of how LARGE the fic itself is. I had to split the text block up for ease of handling.

I saved as a PNG, and loaded up my fancy printable vinyl into my printer and went through the software for printing, I had to do some fiddling but for my purposes I had to get the whole cover in the right size on the page- it took some fiddling yours might be simpler it might be more complex. But once I got it printed I trimmed off the white and was left with a peel-able rather velvety feeling thing.

Remove the backing. Get the iron on and go low and slow with the provided barrier material to prevent melting and damage to the print you've just done.

I made spines as well and made an 11 x 8.5 (Or brochure template)

And lined up my spines accordingly as to not waste materials. There will be grids that pop up automatically to let you know if things line up.

Print them out on the "highest quality" out put for your photo software.

It peels like a sticker. It may take a bit to get it going.

Line it up as nicely as you can on the cover (double check on the still exposed board).

There is a protective sheet that comes with it USE IT. Set your iron to a low heat and move it around frequently.

If you're in a relatively humid area (I live in a coastal town so the humidity is pretty high all year). Have a heavy book to squish your covers down with to try and get out any bends that may happen post ironing (also why we want low and slow).

Leave to cool.

Now you have a text block and a cover.

For all intents and purposes for my demonstration I'm leaving the spine off and am redoing everything with this fic from the ground up. There are aspects and mistakes that I have made that have irked my brain. So I will be leaving the spines off for this round. This is the learning curve and since a lot have things have clicked into place since beginning this series that have given me the "AH HA! CLARITY!" moment. I have completely reworked EVERYTHING in my text block of Celestial Navigation. Plus I've a perfectionist issue that is a lot milder than what it was.

But these two text blocks will work as my "Ground Zero" and will be the books I compare all potential future binds too.

As a note that I said in the beginning of this endeavor:

THIS IS FOR PERSONAL USE ONLY. FOR THE LOVE OF FUCK DO NOT SELL WORK THAT DOES NOT BELONG TO YOU!!!! YOU HAVE ASKED PERMISSION (I dearly hope) TO DO THIS DO NOT BREAK TRUST WITH THE AUTHOR.

IF You want to offer a copy to the author- GO FOR IT. Close friend that is showing interest in the fic?? Sure ok.

But if you sell it for monetary gain? I hope you stub your toe, and just before it finally heals you stub your toe again and may all your breakfast cereal turn to slugs.

DO NOT BE A DICK. I am writing this whole 'How To' Series as an experiment of Good Faith that you, the potential binder, will do right by the community and not compound an issue that has been cropping up. Etsy sellers, and this horrible Facebook community that will steal other's typesets, and begin selling them.

Like I said- this is a breech in Fair Use.

Now with that lecture, again, out of the way lets settle the rest of this series.

You will need:

Glue

Book Press

glue brush

Wax Paper.

Your Cover.

Your Text block.

Get your textblock and cover lined up with some wax paper in the middle of the decorative pages (if you're doing them other wise the page you glue down to the cover and the rest of the text block.

Fiddle, fart and dry fit until you are satisfied.

Lay down a layer of glue on the page NOT THE COVER ITSELF.

DON'T BE ME. I FUCKED UP HARDCORE AND DID THE COVER WITH THE GLUE. HOOOOO NELLY LET ME TELL YOU HOW BADLY THAT FUCKED SHIT UP.

HOW BAD WAS IT? BAD. VERY BAD. DON'T BE LIKE ME THAT FIRST ROUND, BE LIKE ME ON THE SECOND ROUND AND PUT GLUE ON THE END PAGE.

Line up the textblock for a final time and then apply the paper to the cover open the textblock and smooth what you just glued down. Flip over and repeat.

Then add weight to the text block put it back in your press, or if you're like me and have a reprint in the press just throw books atop the block.

Allow glue to cure over night.

Shiver, shudder, and lay on the floor. Your fic is now a book that you can put on your shelf.

Welcome to the wild wild world of bookbinding.

I've been your host trying their best to explain all the things.

I will likely continue this series with "OK SO I LEARNED SOME SHIT ALL THAT SHIT I WROTE BEFORE FEEL FREE TO LISTEN BUT I'VE GOT BETTER SOLUTIONS NOW" time stuff.