#please don't let me make an absolute fool of myself
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...BIG FEELS AND BIG PLOT DEVELOPMENTS AT THE END OF THAT BOOK, HUH
#Tyto reads WoF#i know it's not the most pressing issue what with the vengeful ex-Queen and the murderous sister and all#but I still want to point out how alarming it is that the new crew are all going to be wearing seemingly radioactive rocks as jewelry now#Turtle please don't pick up strange rocks that give off their own heat for the love of all that's good#ANYWAY yeah what the actual frick is going on with Darkstalker huh. I genuinely do NOT know whether he's trustworthy or not#desperately lonely and unfairly demonized? absolutely. truly cares about Moon as a friend? I think so.#capable of integrating peacefully into modern dragon society without letting his own ego turn him into the monster he denies ever being?#....... 😬 remains to be seen#god and there's Scarlet's mysterious new accomplice(?) with the maddeningly vague physical description and also THE SCROLL(!!!!)#and i just realized we failed to get resolutions in this book for EITHER the vision of Turtle attacking Anemone OR#Flame's unique and frightening ability to sense and/or attack mindreaders????#where the HECK are we going with Flame I am going lowkey INSANE over him#ugh frick and Umber and Sora are both on the run too...!! this book is nearly as cliffhangery as Dark Secret#(though thankfully i prepared for this by checking the next book out ahead of time so i wouldn't have to wait LOL)#uhh buhh final thoughts before i force myself to go to sleep:#I love Moon and everything going on with her but I do feel like on some level it's even more of a slap in the face for poor Starflight#that the only tribe to get multiple POV characters in this first. like. extended arc(?) appears to be the NightWings#and Starflight himself doesn't get any of the tribe's unique defining features or abilities#i mean i guess the same is sort of true of Sunny and yes i know it was the POINT of book 4 that the tribe had no powers#but still idk it just feels like kicking the poor boy when he's already down. in addition to him literally getting beaten up again#(... now watch me be a total fool and the arc actually extends past book 8 or something making this point moot lol)#(I'm only assuming it ends at 8 bc that's where the previews in the back of the previous books have stopped)#EDIT: LOL yep turns out this arc does extend out to book 10 and the other POVs are Turtle and Qibli so I stand corrected.#that's what I get for nightblogging
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ive had this idea for a while but idk if you have already done it (if you have please tag me) but like them being lovesick? like they are so in love with you, ive have literally seen ZERO of this. please and thank you!!!
YUP I LOVED WRITING THIS bc i myself get lovesick so EASILY so this came super easy to me
。゚゚・。・゚゚。 ゚。 sick for you ; blake, tanner, isaac
゚・。・゚
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genre; fluff
type; headcanons
read below!
BLAKE ;
Definitely keeps it to himself, doesn't let anyone else know he's feeling the way he's feeling.
The only one that would know he's feeling lovesick would probably be Isaac. Only because Isaac catches on to the small things really easily.
Isaac catches all Blake's little glances at you, he notices when his face goes red when you're mentioned.
As for how Blake feels when lovesick, he's super confined to his own brain and tries not to hang around you a whole lot, because he's scared he'll reveal himself and how he feels.
When he has to be around you though, he's always red in the face and trying to make small conversation with you.
Whether the conversation is awkward or not, he loves every time he talks to you, because he's getting somewhere.
He likes to buy you little gifts, just because. Y'know, he's in love with you. He takes note of stuff you like, because he wants to show he cares.
When he finally asks you out, or more so whenever Isaac told him to ask you out, and you say yes, he just pulls you in for the tightest hug ever.
TANNER ;
Oh my god he's such a fool when he's lovesick. He's the kind to feel physically sick when he's crushing on someone, because it hits him HARD.
Always feels giddy and happy around you, so he makes it a point to hang out with you when he can.
He's always cracking his best jokes around you to try and make you laugh, because when he hears you laugh it makes him so unbelievably happy.
Definitely the type to leave notes around you and label them as "-ur secret admirer <3" but he alters his handwriting so you don't actually know who it was.
The type to make jokes like "What if.. What if we held hands? Ahaha, only joking!" He is not joking.
He makes it so obvious, but you'd never tell him it was obvious, it'd break his heart.
After about a year of these shenanigans, he finally builds up the courage to ask you out. When you say yes, he has to stop himself from just jumping on you and kissing you.
ISAAC ;
He's subtle, but he's also not.. not subtle.
He likes to crack jokes like Tanner, "Hey, Y/n, how funny would it be if we dated?" "What?" "Nothing."
The only one to actively seek you out; he actually calls you and texts you daily. He isn't afraid of being straightforward!
He always texts you to see if you're down to hang out, and if you say yes, he feels physically sick all day.
Absolutely loves being around you, but it also makes him feel like he's gonna vomit.
That feeling doesn't stop until you guys are actually dating.
Him and Tanner are pretty similar, aside from the fact that Isaac actually makes moves.
He peppers in some pet names that could kind of be passed off as platonic, but his heart could burst when you smile at the fact of him calling you 'dear'.
When he finally asks you out, and you say yes, he could fall to his knees right then and there.
#alex's writing#arachnoo.txt#tgc x reader#tgc#tgc x you#tgc x y/n#the group chat x reader#the group chat x y/n#the group chat x you#the group chat#isaacwhy#isaacwhy x y/n#isaacwhy x you#isaacwhy x reader#yumi#yumi x you#yumi x y/n#yumi x reader#big t#big t x y/n#big t x you#big t x reader
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Good Graces - Part Two
。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆ 。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆ 。・:*:
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Please do not copy or post my work anywhere!
(ʙᴀɴɴᴇʀ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ʙʏ ᴍᴇ, ɪꜰ ʏᴏᴜ ᴜꜱᴇ ᴘʟᴇᴀꜱᴇ ᴄʀᴇᴅɪᴛ)
。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆ 。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆ 。・:*:
。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆ 。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆ 。・:*:
Part One
。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆ 。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆ 。・:*:
Pairing: Rafe Cameron x Reader Summary: Betrayal is heavy even between the love they share. Though she loves him, his actions and words are more than hurtful to himself rather than others around him. Warnings: TOXIC!Rafe (honestly cannon), SEMI TOXIC!Reader, hella angst. Cannon events of s1e5. Word Count: 3.5k+ Proofread?: Yes, by @socialpsycho484 A/N: Ngl I was giggling like a fool at the amount of angst and toxicity in this part of the series and I’m so absolutely excited to start the next part but unfortunately have to put it writing on pause for the weekend due to my cousins wedding. I hope you all enjoy! Remember positive feedback is highly encouraged and requests are open! Send in any requests or dirty thoughts and I'll respond with my own as well as what that character would do. If you want to be on my taglist just send through my ask box and I'll put you down. Don't forget to follow and turn on post notifications to know when I post next. This is my reblogs, follow to see what I be reading. :)
。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆ 。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆ 。・:*:
Of course I knew Rafe was being serious about me going to Midsummers with him. He had taken me shopping the other day to pick out a dress that matched his sky blue suit which of course didn’t take me long to fall in love with the first one I saw. A satin spaghetti strap that was the exact same color as his suit with a thigh split that hugged me just right. Paired with silver strappy heels to match. My hair in a bun with two pieces from my bangs framing my face. A small diamond tiara on my head as I put the final touches on my makeup. A shout from my parents downstairs telling me that Rafe was here. Glancing at my clock on my nightstand to see it was five o’clock on the dot. A soft scoff escapes my lips as I roll my eyes “Of course..” I mutter to myself, exactly like Rafe to actually be punctual.
I make my way down the steps, holding onto the railing as I descend. Rafe standing in the foyer, his eyes immediately landing on the steps as he hears me come down. He watches as I come into view, eyes widening softly in adoration. His lips part as he’s about to say something, I look at him with a shy smile on my face. The words immediately die on his tongue as he just stares at me. I now stand at the bottom of the stairs, shifting my weight from foot to foot as we just stare at each other. Feeling strangely nervous under his gaze as I watched him with careful eyes. Rafe cleared his throat before looking away, a hand running down his face before looking back at me with his usual unreadable glance paired with his signature smirk. And just like that, the moment is gone causing me to shake out of my shy nervous state.
“You ready?” Rafe sighed out as he walked towards me, still raking his eyes over my figure.
“Yeah, let’s go.” I met Rafe halfway in the foyer. He extended his arm for me to hook on to which I gladly accepted with a small smile. He led the both of us out my front door and to his car. Letting go of my arm to open the passenger door for me.
“Thank you.” I say softly as I climb into the Range Rover. He nods before closing the door and making his way over to the driver side, getting in. He starts up the truck as he looks over to me with a small smile on his face.
“You look good.” He said softly, his eyes trailing down to my thigh that’s exposed by the thigh split. His eyes making their way back to my face as I feel heat crawl up the back of my neck to the tips of my ears. “You always look good though.” he said genuinely, causing the heat to spread to my cheeks as I looked over to him through my eyelashes.
“Thank you, you look good too.” I said shyly, slightly surprising myself with how timid my voice came out. Rafe let out a slight chuckle as he turned his attention forward, pulling out of my driveway to begin the short drive to the country club.
The entire ride eerily silent, the both of us glancing at each other from the corners of our eyes. Seeming like we both are afraid to break the silence first. Before I knew it he was pulling into the parking lot of the country club. I let out a soft sigh as I looked towards the building, seeing half of the island inside and out on the patio. The nervousness slowly crept back into my system. Rafe seemingly sensed my nervousness as he placed a soft hand on my arm, pulling my attention to him. My eyes softened slightly as I tilted my head silently at him.
“Come on, it’ll be okay.” he nodded reassuringly to me, causing me to smile at him with a nod.
“Alright, I’ll believe you.” I said nervously as I reached my hand to touch his on my arm. With that he smiled widely at me and pulled his hand away. Doing the usual routine of getting out and helping me out of the car. He grabs my hand to help me steady myself as I place one foot on the ground, pulling away as I am fully out of the car. I move over to the side allowing him to close the passenger door. He held out his arm for me to take once again, hooking my arm with his as we began our way into the building.
As soon as we made it into the building it felt like everyone suddenly stopped and turned to look at us. I sucked in a sharp breath as I looked around, slowly exhaling as it seemed like only a few people had turned their attention towards us. Rafe’s gaze immediately snapped to the side of my face when he heard me suck in a breath. His arm slightly tightening around mine, in a reassuring way. I turned my gaze to look up at him, meeting his eyes staring intensely at me. His gaze unwavering as worry filled his usually stoic expression, leaning down close to my ear.
“It’s okay.” he said against the shell of my ear, his breath hot against my skin. A shiver runs down my spine as I can only nod in response not trusting my voice at the moment. He pulled back to look at my now reddened face. I looked away as I cleared my throat and pulled completely away from him, putting distance between us. Not wanting to have those who were watching us thinking we were actually together. Knowing that it would never happen. Knowing that he views me only as his best friend.
He watched me pull away, a microscopic frown formed on his face. I didn’t look at him back to him as I moved away from him, moving more into the room of the country club. His arm darted out to grab ahold of me before pulling it back as he clenched his fist, watching me for a moment before following after me.
I glanced around the room, trying to find Topper and Kelce. Absolutely not needing to be alone with Rafe. Not trusting myself to be with him alone in this room full of people. Rafe right on my heels, letting out an annoyed sigh. o
“(Y/N).” Rafe exhaled softly, reaching out to grab my arm. Stopping me in my tracks as soon as he touched me. I turned around, looking up at him with an unreadable gaze. My gaze caused his eyebrows to furrow before he licked his lips. “Never mind.” he shook his head dismissively before letting go of my arm. Now it was my turn for my eyebrows to furrow.
“No, what?” I spoke softly, only earning a head shake from him as he looked away from me.
“Nothing. Forget it.” he huffed before walking away, further into the crowd. Leaving me standing there confused as I watched his figure retreat. A bit disappointed for the abrupt abandonment but also thankful for it at the same time.
。・:*:・゚。・:*:・゚。・:*:・゚。・:*:・゚。・:*:・゚。・:*:・゚。・:*:・゚
The sun is about to set, the party in full swing as I lean against one of the railings outside. Watching everyone on and around the dance floor with a glass of champagne in my hand. Sarah of course on the dance floor having fun. Rafe, Topper and Kelce along with a few of their other friends standing in a circle near the dance floor talking amongst themselves. A smile on my face as I watch Rafe for a moment, tipping my glass up to my lips to take a sip. The champagne hit the back of my throat right as Rafe turned his head slightly, catching me staring. My heart stops beating for a second as our eyes meet, he smiles softly at me with a small wave. He went back to paying attention to his friends as a figure with a drink tray moving quickly through the crowd caught my attention. The blonde curls on the figure's head are easily recognizable, JJ. Worry swirled viciously in my stomach as I watched him walk past Rafe, letting out a soft exhale as Rafe didn’t seem to notice him. Knowing exactly what would happen if Rafe did see him. Confusion is now taking over me, making me wonder how he got in when I knew he wasn’t working as a server for this year's Midsummers. I turned my head towards the beach since that’s the only possible way he could’ve snuck up without noticing, shaking my head softly as I turned back to keep a careful eye on both JJ and Rafe. My eyebrows furrowed when I couldn’t spot him for a moment before finding him right as he handed something over to Sarah. Making her look confused at it as they talked amongst themselves. Whatever his reply was to her caused her to smile and walk away from him. My eyes darted around for a moment to see where Rafe was, frowning when I no longer saw him, Kelce or Topper where they were before. Panic surging as I turned to look back towards JJ who now had Rafe’s hands on the kid’s shoulders with Kelce right next to him. Both of them looked at JJ like he was some kind of prey to them. My stomach twists with uneasiness as I begin to walk over to them, setting my glass down on a nearby table. Rafe signaled for the other boys to come over as they all began to follow JJ into the building before I’m able to reach them. My pace quickened as I followed them. Clattering of chairs being pushed around and startled noises out of guests being heard as the boys busted out into a sprint as soon as they got into the building. I tried my best to keep up, apologizing softly to the people who they disturbed. Furrowing my eyebrows as I looked around trying to find them but coming up short until I heard groans coming from the men's locker room. My eyebrows shoot up as I go towards the locker room. My heels clack against the flooring as I move closer.
“Learn your etiquette, my friend.” Rafe calmly says with a sarcastic tone as JJ sounds like he’s struggling. I move to the area they’re in, letting out a loud gasp as I see that Kelce is holding JJ in a choke hold with Rafe standing in front of them. None of them realized I had made my way in as they continued to terrorize JJ. The room suddenly went silent for me as I watched in horror. JJ spat on Rafe for whatever he had said. Rafe’s fist came up about to punch JJ in the face before I sprinted to stand in front of JJ. My eyes narrowed at Rafe as I stared at him with disapproval and anger causing him to falter a bit, Kelce finally letting go of JJ. Rafe’s lips parted as he stared at me, guilt swirling in his body language for a brief second before going back to being indecipherable.
“Gentlemen!” a security guy boomed as he flicked the lights “Is there a problem here guys?” the guy asked as Rafe moved to push me behind him. JJ of course being JJ hiked up the dramatics, making a joke of the situation. Rafe scratched at his ear while stifling a disbelieving laugh at JJ’s stupidity before scowling as JJ gets escorted out.
“You Powerpuff Girls have fun.” JJ looks back to tease, a smirk on his face before turning back around. Rafe looks like he’s about to say something causing me to put my hand on his arm to try to get him to not say anything. But of course he just shrugs me off and steps forward with a smirk on his face.
“Tell Kiara she’s pretty hot for a Pouge.” he called out after JJ, voice dripping in sarcasm still. JJ pushed at the security guy rushing back towards Rafe before Kelce grabbed hold of him, pushing at him as the security guy grabbed JJ again. My eyes widened as I looked at the back of Rafe’s head in disbelief. Words muffled as I just stared in shock at Rafe. I see Rafe’s shoulders shake in a laugh as he turns to look at me, his expression faltering as he’s met with my glower.
“What?” he spouted out as his look soon matched mine. My eyebrows raised as I blinked out at the tone he used on me, a scoff escaping my lips. My mind reeling due to the fact he actually used the same harsh tone he uses when he’s in the presence of someone he dislikes.
He looks from me to Kelce, signaling with his head to get everyone out so he and I could talk alone. I shook my head at him, not wanting to hear a single thing he had to say. Putting my hand up to keep him from speaking. His lips opened and closed like a fish out of the water as he just stared at me trying to figure out what he wanted to say. I waited for Kelce to leave before opening my mouth.
“I absolutely have no words for you Rafe Cameron.” I spit out harshly as I glared daggers into him. His shoulders sagging a bit, fully knowing he’s about to hear the onslaught of my words.
“(Y/N), please-” he starts but is cut off by my bitter laugh as I point my finger at him.
“No, absolutely not. You are not allowed to talk.” I said sternly as I pointed back at myself “I’m talking and you’re going to listen to the words I have to say.” I stepped closer as I dropped my hand to my side. Closing the distance between us as I kept my gaze locked onto his.
“You’re a real piece of shit for what you did. JJ wasn’t doing anything at all to harm anyone. I don’t understand what it is that you have against him besides him just being from The Cut.” I took a breath in as I searched his eyes for any sign of remorse but of course he built up his walls as he just stared at me blankly. I shook my head softly with a small disbelieving laugh.
“That’s really why you hate everyone from The Cut? Because they weren’t born with a silver spoon in their mouth? Because they continually have to struggle from not having a constant source of income?” I sneered at him, pushing a finger into his chest. I raised my eyebrows at him, waiting for any type of response from him. His jaw clenched as he seemed to be lost behind his eyes, deep in thought. After a few moments of silence he let out a soft sigh.
“He’s a dirty Pogue. He’s good for nothing and a thief! He pulled a gun on Topper at The Boneyard not too long ago!” he tried to defend as I just shook my head with a laugh.
“That is not your fight then Rafe.” I say simply as I look into his eyes “If he’s just a dirty Pogue then what are you? You’re just as bad as him if you decide to use violence against someone to assert your authority. But also wasn’t Topper holding John B under the water when JJ pressed the gun to his head?” I questioned with a condescending tone causing him to let out a scoff as a scowl almost forms on his face.
“That’s not the point and you know it. He’s-” Rafe started with the tone he used earlier before I pressed my hand to his mouth getting him to shut up. His eyebrows raised immediately as my hand touched his face.
“Gods, you’re such an absolute asshole Rafe. Do I need to remind you that your own father is from The Cut, he was able to escape that. Do I also need to remind you that I am from The Cut as well?” I raised an eyebrow before letting go of his mouth. Almost instantly I could see the immediate regret cross his facial features as he looked at me in remorse before shaking his head at me.
“You know that’s not what I meant and you live over here on Figure Eight now. You’re not like that at all.” he said in a soft regretful tone as he grabbed ahold of my hands. “You’re nothing like those Pogues.” he said softly as his thumbs stroke the back of my hands. My eyebrows furrow as my face turns more into a scowl. I pull myself away from him which causes him to feel panicked as he searches my face.
“Nothing like them? I was one when we met! But you didn’t seem to care because we were only five at the time. By the time we were ten is when I reached Kook status and moved to Figure Eight. Once a Pogue, always a Pogue. Remember that Rafe.” I spat out at him. His eyes widened as I raised my voice, a look of astonishment crossed his features as he processed my words. His lips parted slightly as tried to come up with something to say to me, looking off to the side as he shook his head before looking back at me.
“Look, okay. I’m sorry (Y/N).” he says softly in a voice laced with sorrow as he looks back at my hardened glare.
“Save it Rafe. I don’t want to hear it.” I spoke sternly, “Just leave me alone.” I added softly as I looked away from him. His eyebrows shot up in shock.
“What do you mean?” he asked, his voice laced in distress as he tried to mentally figure out what I meant. I shook my head at him before pushing past him to walk out of the locker room.
“(Y/N)! (Y/N) wait!” He called out after me as I ignored him, moving out the doors angrily only to see Kelce standing right outside of them. I let out a scoff as Kelce and I made eye contact, shaking my head at him. His eyebrows furrowed as he took in my irritated expression.
“Wait, where are you going? What’s going on?” He asked confused right as Rafe walked out. I looked to Rafe then back to Kelce, ignoring the both of them as I made my way back to the patio of the country club.
A commotion outside caused me to raise my eyebrows as I picked up my pace to see what was going on.
“Hey mandatory power hour at Rixon’s, Kie. Pope, you as well, alright?” I hear JJ speak out as I finally made it out of the glass pane doors. Looking around to see what was going on as I hear Kiara’s parents along with Pope’s dad begging them not to leave.
“You got room for one more?” I called out as I made eye contact with JJ, catching him by surprise as he nodded his head. His eyes widen slightly as he looks behind me. Before I’m able to turn I feel a hand grab onto my arm, the grip tight.
“I don’t think so.” Rafe’s voice spoke out harshly against my ear, the hot air of his breath angering me. I yank away from him as not looking back at him, not wanting to meet his icy glare.
“Watch me.” I spoke out in a mutter as I joined Kiara and Pope in their rush to leave.
“(Y/N)!” Rafe screamed at me, causing me to laugh, running faster after the Pogues.
Once over to them I glanced back to find Rafe’s stare, a look of betrayal in his eyes. Kelce behind him looked completely shocked that I’m willingly leaving with the Pogues. I looked around for Topper, spotting him a few moments later. His features are unreadable.
“So.. (Y/N)?” The sound of my name leaving someone’s lips caused me to turn to look at the group. All of their eyes mixed with confusion and untrust as well as astonishment.
“Once a Pogue always a Pogue.” I say with a confident nod, causing them to look at each other before smiling and nodding.
“Welcome aboard.” JJ slung his arm around my shoulder as we all began to make our way down to the boat on the beach.
Rafe’s eyes staring at the back of my head as I disappeared into the darkness. He angrily stormed back into the country club, ignoring Kelce as he rushed towards the locker room. Immediately punching the wall and letting out a bellowing scream. His head spinning with the thoughts of my betrayal as well as the thought of losing me forever. Losing the one person he loves forever.
Meanwhile I sat on the boat with the Pogues, looking down at my sky blue dress. The heavy weight of guilt and betrayal filling my chest by the thought of the person I love the most hurting so intensely.
。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆ 。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆ 。・:*:
Part Three
。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆ 。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆ 。・:*:
Taglist: @wearemadeofstardust0
。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆ 。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆ 。・:*:
#wannabekook good graces#rafe cameron#rafe#rafe cameron outer banks#rafe outer banks#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron x y/n#rafe cameron fanfic#obx imagine#obx x reader#obx x you#obx x y/n#outer banks imagine#outer banks x reader#outer banks x you#outer banks x y/n#drew starkey#drew starkey x reader#drew starkey x y/n#Spotify
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the reformatory.
dialogue prompts from the reformatory by tananarive due.
why'd you do a fool thing like that?
don't run barefoot.
school is holier than church.
everyone knowing your name isn't always a blessing.
i can speak for myself.
what's got into you?
you little shit.
you pushed me first.
what would ____ have done?
not all stories are suited for the ears of children.
you can only trust explosive secrets with three people, maybe four.
we should have run away when we had the chance.
you talk too damn much.
we'll get there faster if we cut through the woods.
sometimes life throws you a curveball, and you end up in places you never expected.
are the stories true?
i've never seen a more superstitious place.
there's no such thing as ghosts. that's an absolute fact.
evil is never plain to the eye.
stop fretting. just makes it worse.
sometimes the only justice is a hot meal and a bed to sleep in.
you know how to cook?
it could've been last week, for how well i remember it.
you think i don't know an evil eye when i see one?
if you're dead, stay dead.
you're scared of your shadow. always jumping.
who is it? who locked the door?
none of you can take a joke.
you seem more tired than usual.
you can talk sense when you want to.
men do evil every day and call it 'doing their job'.
i've heard all i can stand.
this is only a season, and it will pass. no matter what happens.
you don't bother me, i won't bother you.
you talk too damn much.
say you're sorry. put it behind you.
there's more ahead for you than this.
this isn't everything. there's more than this.
stories are dangerous.
if i needed you to, you'd cover for me?
no one stays nice. best to remember it.
go on. ask me what i know.
i wish i could say i had good news.
get a good cry out if you want.
you're not as smart about the world as you think you are.
no good talk starts at a bar.
mama used to say that unaired feelings ate you up inside.
i'm sorry. i've got no right to blame you.
don't tell your business on the phone.
hush that damn foolishness.
don't you be sick in my truck.
sometimes the worst thing happens. usually, in fact.
how do you believe in god, with all the bad things?
this whole world is a lie, the bad things and the good things.
you've got an answer for everything, don't you?
it's like you can see every thought in my head.
what did i ever do to you?
don't talk about my parents.
don't talk like you know anything about me.
everybody won't see. but you might.
telling the truth always breaks the peace.
one thing i've learned: everything seems fine, until it ain't. and then we come to see it wasn't ever fine.
i was never allowed to have nicknames.
____ made me feel like i mattered.
be strong. like _____. can you do that?
it'll be alright, as long as you tell the truth.
all a man has in the world is his name. your name outlives you.
i tried to tell you, didn't i?
you're so dumb. not the dumbest i've ever seen, but pretty damn close.
you don't get to ask about ____.
if you see me run, follow behind. no matter what.
please let me do something to help.
they wear you down one wrong at a time.
we should use a code to talk about it.
never give up a chance to laugh.
i'm beyond your help.
being dead isn't so bad.
you thought i didn't know?
does anyone remember you?
you need me, just like i need you.
constant worry steals everything from you.
i don't like strangers in my house.
you need a place to stay, and i have a spare room.
sometimes we say a thing to try to believe it.
i don't know what game you're playing, but it's a dangerous one.
the secret to war is the sacrifices friends make for each other.
we don't all sit around in a clubhouse. is that what you think?
let it out. but when you're done crying, we need to go over the plan.
wait a minute. just slow down.
we're no better than them.
some mistakes you don't come back from.
everything is a trick with you.
i don't want to kill anybody. not even ____.
#rp meme#rp memes#ask memes#sentence starters#inbox meme#ask meme#rp prompts#horror meme#historical meme
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Twisted Entertainment News ~April Fools 2024~
The Aniplex Youtube Channel dropped a parody news segment for April Fools Day, which had Kazuki Furuta (Kalim) and Kaname Futaba (Jamil) as "commentators." A full official MMD clip of Absolutely Beautiful was shown, and afterwards, Furuta and Futaba "taught" the viewers back home how to do the dance. I don't normally do transcriptions of videos, but this one made me laugh with enjoyment that I wanted to make sure that everyone else could enjoy it too, especially since I know this video is region-locked. I've highlighted Furuta and Futaba's names with the colors for Kalim and Jamil's that I usually use for their vignettes. I've also added small commentary on their movements and expressions, which is not something I normally have to do for vignettes. I also only translated the "news" portion of the video and left out the final part, which was them returning to reality and talking about the monitors in the in-game shop that could be bought for the Guest Room. I hope this transcription is enjoyable for everyone else, too! Please check it out under the cut!
Newscaster Yasuda: Good evening to Twisted Wonderland and to all those who have found themselves transported here. It’s time for Twisted Entertainment News, where we report on all the hottest entertainment topics. I have with me today two very well-known commentators who have appeared on so many of the variety talk shows as of late: Kazuki Furuta-san and Kaname Futaba-san.
Commentator Kazuki Furuta: Good evening, I’m Kazuki Furuta. I’m beyond honored to have been asked to come on this show as a commentator. Thank you very much for inviting me.
Commentator Kaname Futaba: Good evening, I’m Kaname Futaba. You know, I really dig Twisted Entertainment News.
Furuta: I do hear you say that often.
Futaba: Yeah. I watch it every week, and even record it.
Furuta: Indeed.
Futaba: I’m really hoping we’ll have a ton of great things to talk about. Thanks for having me.
Yasuda: Well, let’s get right into today’s entertainment news. First, Magical Motors is finally venturing into space. Second, are the rumors that the Mysterious Amusement Park is closing true!? And finally, the Absolute Dance is the current breakout trend. Of these three topics, the Absolute Dance is probably the most eye-catching, so, Furuta-san, Futaba-san, have you heard of this dance before?
Furuta: Very much so. It is very popular even in my circles, so not a day goes by that I do not come across it.
Futaba: I’ve known about it for some time now, too. So, I guess it feels like the times have finally caught up.
Furuta: You’re so right.
Futaba: Yeah.
Yasuda: Now then, we’ve prepared a video to show what exactly this dance is all about. Please take a look.
[Absolutely Beautiful Official Dance MMD plays while Yasuda, Furuta, and Futaba are shown in the top right corner, watching]
[clip ends, Yasuda, Furuta, and Futaba applaud politely]
Furuta: How amazing was that?
Futaba: Yeah, a great clip.
Furuta: Indeed.
Yasuda: So, this “Absolute Dance” originally comes from the dance movements of the song “Absolutely Beautiful.” It seems that thanks to the performance by Night Raven College stu-
Furuta: [interrupting] Night Raven College!
Yasuda: …Right. The students performed this song and dance at the school’s cultural festival and this garnered a lot of hype.
Furuta: [jumping in] Hype!
Yasuda: …Right. I do believe that this is a rather complicated dance that cannot be mastered just from watching it once. So, today I hoped to have our commentators, Furuta-san and Futaba-san, to show those of you watching this show at home how to perform it so that everyone can dance along.
Futaba: I see.
Furuta: Of course.
Yasuda: Furuta-san, I’ve heard that you may be a commentator, but you are also a very good dancer.
Furuta: [sounding like he wants to protest politely but is also smug at the praise] Ah, well― that is― by myself, I― [background music cuts] Yes, I am!
Yasuda: Right, thank you. And so, I was hoping we could receive an instructional demonstration from you on how this dance is performed.
Furuta: [politely but smugly trying to refute] Ah, that― Heh― Of course.
Yasuda: Wonderful, we would be so grateful.
Furuta: Of course! Now, I’ve chosen 4 specific points of the song to dance to in order to help anyone master the Absolute Dance. Those of you watching, please feel free to dance along!
[screen transitions to Furuta standing in front of the desk, with Futaba and Yasuda sitting and watching]
Furuta: Now for the first dance point: I’ll start with the opening dance for the song.
[Furuta dances Vil's movements from the chorus at the beginning of the song while Futaba's eyes widen as he watches intently]
[dance ends]
Futaba: Just hold on a sec. That’s so amazing?! I’m so shocked. Like, especially the third part of the second-eighths was really good.
Furuta: The third part of the second-eighths, you mean this movement, yes? [shows off the specific dance move again]
Futaba: It’s fantastic! And this dance looks like it moves your entire body, so I bet it’s really good for your health, too.
Furuta: Oh yes, especially that movement. It uses the whole shoulder joint so I believe it could be good for relieving any stiffness in the shoulder.
Futaba: This is spectacular.
Furuta: Thank you very much.
Futaba: Man…
Furuta: Now then, I think it’s time to move onto the second part.
Futaba: [quietly, to himself] That was shocking.
Furuta: The second dance point:
Futaba: [quietly, to himself] I’m so shocked.
Furuta: Jamil’s― [turns to address Futaba] Oh, was it shocking?
Futaba: Yeah, totally shocking. Sorry.
Furuta: I’m so glad to hear that. [turns back to the camera] I'll now dance the part with Jamil’s rap.
Futaba: [quietly, to himself] Really shocking.
[Music begins to lead into Jamil's rap, Furuta prepares himself to start dancing]
Futaba: [quietly, to himself] Man, I’m still reeling from that shocker.
[Furuta starts by dancing Ace/Deuce's movements while Futaba stares in awe]
Futaba: No way...
[Furuta continues by dancing Kalim/Rook's movements while Futaba continues watching him in awe]
[dance ends]
Futaba: This part… I mean, your dance was just astounding, don’t get me wrong. But… this voice rapping just now… I really like this voice!
Furuta: [turns to address Futaba] It’s a very familiar voice, isn’t it?
Futaba: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Furuta: [turns back to the camera] Almost like it feels really close to me, that’s right.
Futaba: It’s just so smooth.
Furuta: Smoothly, yes, the lyrics just come so smoothly.
Futaba: So smoothly.
Furuta: Yes, it just enters my mind so smoothly.
Futaba: It really gets me hyped.
Furuta: Just from the first sound, it just― [Furuta starts dancing] I can just flow with the music.
Futaba: Yeah, this’ll just get your body dancing on its own. Amazing.
Furuta: [turns to address Futaba] Would you like to dance up here together?
Futaba: [background music cuts] Ah, no, I’m good.
Furuta: [turns back to the camera] It seems he’s good, so I’ll move on to the third dancing point: The solo dances by each student during the song’s interlude. And for this― [a little out of breath] for this…
Futaba: Uh-huh.
Furuta: Well, for this part, I will be dancing Kalim’s portion.
Futaba: You’re breathing a bit hard, you good?
Furuta: [turns to address Futaba] Oh, I’m fine.
Futaba: You sure?
Furuta: [turns back to the camera] I’m not tired whatsoever. I am very used to dancing, after all.
Futaba: Then please, go on.
Furuta: Of course.
[Furuta begins dancing Kalim's movements during the interlude while Futaba keeps gazing intently]
[dance ends]
Futaba: No way, that’s so aggressive! Woaaah, this part feels like the most aggressive of the whole set!
Furuta: [turns to address Futaba] How about it, Futaba-san, would you like to dance this aggressive part with me?
Futaba: [background music cuts] Ah, no, I’m good.
Furuta: [addresses Yasuda] Yasuda-san, would you like to dance with me?
Yasuda: No, thank you.
Furuta: [turns back to the camera] Alright then, moving on! Time for the fourth and final dance point: I’ll dance from the song's hook to the end!
[Furuta dances Kalim/Ace's movements for the end of the song while Futaba looks on in amazement and awe]
[dancing ends, Futaba starts a slow clap, picks up speed, then stands up]
Futaba: EXCELLENT! PERFECT! BEAUTIFUL! Futaba-kun, you’re amazing! You’re an absolute genius!
Furuta: [turns to address Futaba] Thank you very much. Shall we share a dance together?
Futaba: [background music cuts] Ah, no, I’m good. [sits back down]
Furuta: [turns back to the camera] It seems he’s good, so for everyone else, I hope you were able to learn how to dance this song. After all the energy and effort I put into this instructional demonstration, there’s no way you can’t dance it now, I’m sure.
Futaba: Absolutely. Thank you for the dance lecture, Furuta-san.
Furuta: [turns to address Futaba] Futaba-san, I do hope you’ll dance with me on the next occasion.
Futaba: [background music cuts] Ah, no, I’m good.
Furuta: [turns back to the camera] It seems he’s good.
Fin
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YOICHI ISAGI X SAE'S DAUGHTER!READER
A/N: Y'ALL this part of the Single dad Sae series. Yes Isagi is the boy who she was making out with last time, SO this is basically like a what happens next with them. Kind of like an au where Isagi can be the same age as Sae's daughter
Warnings: None.
Description: After absolut embarrassment and staying home as a punishment, you thought your father's outburst infront of Isagi would ruin any chance you could ever have with him. To your suprise,you are proved wrong very quickly.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/78d8a7eae17d4f3d2bc7fd09348f9a3f/4f47856348b67fbf-48/s540x810/e49dbce35f577302dddb95c3b515d405b6bfd102.jpg)
"Are you seriously still sulking?" you heard your father talk from the door, but you didn't respond. "I'm the one who should be mad. I saw you making out with some boy I don't know. Who knows what could've happened if I didn't intervene? You're way too young for that kind of thing. Is he even your boyfriend or anything?"
"He's not gonna be now..."
"Oh, you got that right. I don't want to see you around this boy again; you are forbidden from talking to him."
"Dad!!! Don't you think you're exaggerating a little bit?" you complained, rolling over on your bed to look at his angry face standing on the doorframe.
"I don't think I am, actually." he would've said more, but he heard the bell ring, so he started to walk away from her. "Stay there, you're still grounded."
But what he found on the other side of the door couldn't have been predicted. As soon as he opened, he saw Isagi standing infront of him, face flushed with embarrassment and hands behind his back. He spoke in a shy tone.
"Um... hello, is your daughter home?"
"Not for you." he was about to close the door right then but Isagi was quick to stop him from doing so.
"Wait! It's just that... she isn't answering my texts..."
"She's grounded." he pushed the door harder to close it, but Yoichi was holding it open pretty hard as well.
"I-I just... I brought her these!" he used his free hand to show him a little bouquet of flowers that he was hiding behind his back, and Sae stopped. "I figured she might be grounded and sad... can I at least give her these?"
"No."
"Please?" he tried his best to make the most convincing puppy eyes, but it was nothing against Sae.
However, he did make him think. His daughter WAS grounded and sad, but he still didn't trust this boy enough to see her.
"Just leave the flowers; I'll give them to her."
"Oh.. um... I was hoping to give them to her myself? It's not as personal otherwise..."
"Boy, just give me the flowers." Isagi sighed, letting Sae take the flowers he so carefully hand-picked for you, and after that the door was closed again.
Sae was disgusted, but he still went over to his daughter's room and knocked on her open door.
"What?"
"Isagi came here to see you... he left you these." as soon as you heard that name you sat up on your bed, turning around to see the flowers Isagi left you. They were so pretty; how could he be so sweet? Even after your dad made a scene infront of him, he was trying to reach out to you. Which meant he didn't mind that your kiss was interrupted, or that your dad was being really rude towards him; he still wanted to see you. The thought almost made you cry from joy, because you were about to die of embarrassment remembering the way he hit his head when you pushed him away the night before after your dad showed up and discovered you sneaked out.
You got up from your bed and walked towards Sae to take the flowers. Bright and healthy, they even smelled amazing... you couldn't help but smile like a lovesick fool at the sight and smell of these beautiful flowers.
"Did you seriously not let him in?" you complained. "It's so cruel to just leave him outside."
"He can go home if he doesn't want to stand there; he'll give up eventually."
"Why do you hate him so much?"
"I don't hate him. I just don't like his presence, and the fact that he was so okay making out with a stranger at some party." he leaned against the doorframe, completely unconcerned about your obvious annoyance. "And then he just comes here with flowers like it's the most normal thing to do? It's making me look like the bad guy. I'm just trying to protect you from someone who took advantage of a vulnerable girl."
"First of all, wrong, he was not a stranger when we kissed at the party. I met him at school; we've seen each other before." you corrected him, and he rolled his eyes. "Second. Vulnerable? Really?? I'm not six anymore, dad. I can take care of myself, but you still treat me like I'm some little kid that needs protection."
"I doubt that considering you acted very irresponsibly that night."
"And third, Isagi never took advantage of me. I was the one who started it; I kissed him."
"That doesn't make it better, did you know? In fact, it makes it worse." he stood up straight again. "You kissed him? Why?"
"Because...! I have a crush on him..." you admitted, blushing mostly from embarrassment because why would you tell that to your dad. "I've had a crush on him since a while back, and I was trying to make my move and flirt a little... and it worked but now you won't let me see him!"
"You're too young for a relationship."
"Too young? I'm seventeen. I'm on my senior year; next year I'll be in college! How am I too young?"
"Because at your age hormones are crazy and you could-"
"Oh, my god, don't talk to me about hormones! That is so gross!"
"It might be, but it's true. You might think you'll be responsible but when you're seventeen you act on impulse and do stupid things; especially when it comes to relationships. You shouldn't think about having a boyfriend anytime soon."
"Didn't you and mom get married at NINETEEN? And isn't the difference between your wedding and my birthday like six MONTHS?
"DO NOT bring your mother this, young lady!" you stayed quiet. Now you were regretting making him mad like that; you knew how sensitive he was about that topic. "Yes, your mother and I got married because she got pregnant with you. Happy? Is that what you wanted to hear?"
"No..." you looked down, embarrassed, and talked in a quieter voice. "But... did you guys love each other?"
Sae's expression softened at that, and he sighed.
"Of course, we did. And I kind of lied. Your mother and I were in a stable relationship and lived together, we were planning on getting married later in life but she got pregnant, even when we thought we were careful, so we decided we were ready to be a family."
"So I was an accident...?"
"I wouldn't say an accident. We did talk about having kids before your mother got pregnant; we just didn't think it would happen so soon." he paused. "And that's why I'm trying to tell you to be careful if you want a boyfriend so badly."
"But I know that! And Isagi wouldn't take advantage of me, really."
"I don't care. You're not allowed to see him; this flowers are the last thing you're getting from him." without letting you complain, he walked out and closed the door behind him.
You were about to lay back down in your bed and be miserable, but then you heard something. A little banging, very subtle, coming from outside your window; and peaking inside was Isagi. You rushed to the window and he stood up better to see you.
"I can't open, my dad locked the window." your muffled voices reached him through the other side of the glass. "What are you doing here?"
"I wanna see you." he explained, face blushed slightly and eyes looking at you with shyness. "I wasn't going to let your dad stop me."
"He would kill you if he knew you're here."
"I know. I kinda don't care; I needed to know if..." he struggled to continue with his thought of process, embarrassed by his own words. "If we're okay... I mean, you. Also us but mostly because of the grounding and everything, I wanted to see that you're okay and if we're... like... did you like the flowers?"
"They were beautiful." you smiled. "And I'm okay, I'll survive; it's just two months."
"That's good."
"But..." you paused, thinking about how to express your thoughts out loud. "You really shouldn't have bothered. Why go through all of this trouble just to see me?"
"Well, we kinda have unfinished business." if only you could open your window, he would try to reach out for your hand, or try to hug you, or hold your face or your body close to him for some comfort. He would brush the hair on your face away and pass his fingers though it affectionately, and maybe, just maybe, he gather up the courage to kiss you again. No a full-on makeout like last time, just a slow kiss; a gentle and soft affirmation that you felt the same way about him as he did about you. Instead, he places his hand over the glass on the window. "I... like you a lot, and I really enjoyed our time together last time, and I'm sorry if I was too forward or if I got too carried away; I was too happy when you made the first move. I've had feelings for you for some time now and I-"
"Stop." you interrupted him, making his heart squeeze with fear for a second. Were you stopping him because you didn't like what he was saying? "I don't need to hear anything else. I feel the same way about you; I just want to kiss you." you placed your hand right over his, only the glass separating your skin, and yet he could swear he could feel your warmth. You looked around for something to force the window open, and with your free hand you tried pulling it up.
Realizing what you were attempting, Isagi held onto the edges of the window and pulled as well. He first tried using only one of his hands, then you both used the two of them. He tried shaking the window a little, hoping the lock would come loose, and after what felt like the longest minutes of his life he heard a click, and you were able to open the window.
You wasted no time on grabbing his face and stumping your lips onto his. He almost stumbled, but did not bother complaining; he just let himself relish on your closeness once more.
"Does this mean we get to be a couple then?"
"Yes. I don't care what my dad says; I love you." his blush deepened at that, but his heart was filled with joy from your words. "I want to be with you."
"How though? He's going to kill me if he finds out."
"He doesn't have to find out."
Is what you were saying, but then you heard a yelling voice from the second floor, and a splash of cold water fell on Isagi's head. You both looked up. "HEY! I told you you're forbidden to see him, young lady! Get away from him this instant or you'll be in big trouble." Sae held a now empty bucket and scolded you, but you could only focus on Isagi.
"Are you okay? You should go home for now."
"Yeah, I'm fine. Just a little cold. See you... at school tomorrow?" you nodded. There was no way you were not seeing him at school; your dad couldn't do anything about that.
One thing for sure, it was going to be a challenge.
#itoshi sae#bllk#bllk drabbles#bllk fic#bllk fluff#bllk x reader#blue lock drabbles#blue lock#blue lock fanfiction#blue lock fluff#blue lock x reader#bllk sae#sae itoshi#isagi yoichi#bllk isagi#bllk x you#yoichi isagi#isagi x reader#isagi x you#blue lock isagi#isagi yoichi x reader#isagi yoichi x you
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SAVE A HORSE, RIDE A COWBOY
Written by @h3rmess ✰
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/f7ab73dfce7732579f11bca357433aa9/6e70cef5fa9c660d-f4/s540x810/58ff83010fdf73bdf3e35fc8db5e87288095bf50.jpg)
navi☆
-> cowboy!satoru x afab!reader x cowboy!suguru
warnings - SMUT! use of swear words, use of some spanish (im not native so please correct me if I got something wrong!!) Spanish translation at the end!!
notes - im literally screaming satosugu as cowboys have me in a CHOKEHOLDDD - smut is not usual from me pls don't cringe, or I'll cry
Wandering into the unfamiliar town, I looked around for anything that could indicate my next move. My horse, Lucky, was worn out beyond belief. The summer heat was like no other as she trotted through the desert. I dismounted, spotting a stable a few steps away from us. I led my girl into the stable, the shade it provided, relieving us instantly. I looked around to see if anyone was there.
"Hello? Anybody here?" I hollered, receiving no reply. With a huff, I stroked Lucky's head, comforting her, urging her to hold up a little longer.
A whistle echoed through the stable, catching my attention instantly.
"Well, ain't she a beauty!" His boots clicked on the ground, his hands in the loopholes of his jeans as he made his way in front of us.
"She really is." I looked at Lucky, petting her as she shook her head, neighing.
"I wasn't talking about the horse, muñeca." His voice deepened, igniting something in me.
He made his way closer towards me, inspecting me with careful eyes, his long black hair flowing out of his hat.
"What's a beauty like you doin' 'round here?" He neared me, his slender eyes making me feel like I had to submit to him.
"Oh! I - uh, got a lil' lost." I tried my best to maintain composure.
"Well, don't worry, amor, we'll take good care of you." He slung his arm around me, the proximity only worsening the heat I felt.
"W-we?" I stuttered, causing him to chuckle and turn his head to look behind him.
"Satoru!" He shouted.
As if on cue, a man came in riding a gorgeous brown horse, looking absolutely majestic.
"Yeah? Oh my!" He exclaimed, immediately jumping off his horse and walking towards me. "Who's this?" He asked the black hair man.
"She hasn't told us yet. What's your name, guapa?"
Me breath hitched before I told him, a satisfied hum leaving both their mouths.
"Pretty name for a pretty lady." The man with white hair spoke, taking his sunglasses off to reveal his huge, blue eyes. The colour mesmerised me, causing me to freeze in place, completely unable to move.
"¿Qué pasó, princesa? Cat got your tongue?" The person who I figured to be Satoru taunted, moving closer to me.
My heart beat quickened and I began to swear, thinking only one thing about these men ; they are so fuckable.
"What did you come here for, hm?" The black haired man spoke, his tone making me want to drop to my knees.
"My- uh- m-my horse, Lucky. She's dehydrated, and I wanted to get her some food, water, and rest." I stumbled over each word, making a fool of myself.
"Hear the way she's stuttering, Suguru!" Satoru nudged the black haired man as they both chuckled.
"She truly is precious. Can't let a gem like you get away now, can we?" Suguru's hand found its way to my chin, holding it firmly and lifting my head up to look into his eyes. "We'll get ya all fixed up, alright? Don't you worry, linda."
I nodded dumbly at the two men, following them into where the horses were kept, leading my girl on behind me.
They kept to their word, making sure Lucky had enough food and plenty of water and then allowing her to sleep. I was so grateful to them for lending us their resources out of the kindness of their hearts.
Those same hearts that I hadn't known wanted nothing more than to bend me over.
"She's all rested now, alright?" Satoru spoke, taking his hat off and taking a seat in a room separate to the stable. His legs were spread apart as sweat leaked down his semi-exposed chest. I tried to look at any modest part of him, but no matter how hard I tried, he managed to turn my thoughts lewd time and time again.
He sat on one side of me, Suguru, on the other in a similar position.
Would I be able to take them both? They both look so damn sexy right now. I wonder how big they are...
My thoughts caused my thighs to squeeze together. I thought about how they would manhandle me and I wouldn't complain. I yearned for friction, anything to give me a little bit of relief.
"¿Qué estás haciendo, muñequita?" Suguru asked, his hair out of its prevous bun and now falling sluttily onto his shoulders. It only made the heat between my legs grow, my thighs squeezing closer together.
I hadn't noticed, but I was staring. Intensely. I was undressing him with my eyes.
A finger snapped in front of my eyes, which happened to be Satoru's.
"You okay, querida?" He asked, his voice playful.
"Huh?" I replied simply, turning my head to face him.
"You've been looking at us like you want to fuck us since you got here." Suguru chimed in, making my face flush in embarrassment.
I tried to speak, but no words came out.
"You want us to fuck you, hm?" Satoru hummed, his sweet voice making a squirm slightly.
I nodded furiously, waiting for either of them to make a move.
"Use your words, mami." Suguru sent me over the edge as he placed his hand on my thigh, inching up closer and closer to my heat.
"Yes. Please, I need you... both of you." I mewled pathetically, embarrassed by the words that had just come out of my mouth.
With no hesitation, Suguru slipped his hands under my thighs, hoisting me up onto his lap. I felt his hardness underneath me, instinctively rolling my hips slowly over it, earning a soft grunt from him. His hands found my waist, caressing it up and down, further riling me up.
Satoru took my face in his hands, turning my head towards him and kissing me. He ate at my mouth, covering every single inch of my lips. I groaned into the kiss as Suguru's hands slipped under my skirt, holding onto the rim of my panties.
I grinned against him even harder, feeling Satoru's tongue slip into my mouth, digging its way down my throat.
"Calmate, girl!" Suguru announced, holding my hips to prevent any more movement.
Satoru pulled away from my lips, finding his way to my neck and sucking on the tender skin. I whimpered at his movements, making me grip on to Suguru's shoulders tighter than before.
His hands reached under my skirt, placing a singular finger pad on my clothed bunch of nerves. I cried out, needy and desperate, already fucked-out.
"So pretty..." Satoru whispered on my neck, the sensation paired with the praise, only making me wetter. I whined as I leaned into Suguru's chest.
"Please..." I cried as he massaged me, longing for closer contact.
"Hmm? Please what, amor?" His eyes were stuck on my tits which were squashed against his chest, making his cock twitch.
"I need you.." Satoru pulled away as I spoke, whisking me up and placing me on his lap, taking over Suguru's role.
"Need us how? Dime qué quieres, muñeca." Suguru's lips kissed my collar bone as Satoru unbuttoned my top.
I could only whimper as Satoru's left hand slipped beneath my panties, playing with my slick.
"She's so wet!" Satoru exclaimed, his lack of speech only to be blamed on him being completely immersed in the moment.
His finger moved to Suguru, who opened his mouth and sucked on it, tasting me.
"So sweet..." He groaned, palming himself through his jeans as he kissed my neck once more.
"I need to taste straight from the source. Would you like that, hermosa?" Satoru asked, pushing me down onto my back and moving himself in line with my still covered heat.
I nodded as he tugged at my panties before he stopped and looked up at me.
"Quiero oírte decirlo. Tell me that you want it." He asks for my consent as his face is between my legs, possibly being the hottest thing I've experienced.
"I want it." I tell him as he smirks, kissing up my thighs and sliding my panties down my legs.
"So pretty for us." He says, delving into my folds.
"The prettiest." Suguru adds.
TRANSLATION :
Muñeca = doll
Amor = love
Guapa = pretty
¿Qué pasó, princesa? = what happened, princess?
Linda = cutie
¿Qué estás haciendo, muñequita? = what are you doing, dolly?
Querida = dear
Mami = mommy
Calmate = take it easy
Dime qué quieres, muñeca = tell me what you want, doll
Hermosa = gorgeous
Quiero oírte decirlo = I want to hear you say it
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The Rare Bookseller Part 57: Fitz's Dance
Prev > Masterlist > Next
September 1905
tw: mind control, dehumanization, slavery, kidnapping, drugging
He was being shaken gently, and he managed to crack open his heavy eyes. "Nnnn… let me sleep…"
"You need to wake up now, Fitz," said his master, and Fitz's eyes popped open with a gasp.
"What happened?" he said, looking around. He wasn't in the middle of the party any longer, but seemed to have been taken to a darkened hallway. He could hear the muffled din of the party from a distance -- or maybe it just seemed muffled because his head still felt stuffed full of cotton.
"I did something ridiculous and petty," said Lex. "That rat Jameson wound me up, and instead of ignoring his bait, I just had to show off. I put every thrall in earshot under my power." He sighed. "You must think it's ridiculous. I put both of us in more danger simply for a cheap thrill, and -- why are you smiling like that? Did I not wake you from trance?"
Fitz couldn't hold back the slightly maniacal laugh bubbling up inside him. "Perhaps I'm pleased that my dashing master swooped in to rescue me, and that he made such an ostentatious show of power just because he could."
"You're not upset with me?"
"Lex. Do you really think I would be upset with you for making a big dramatic scene in the middle of a party? I'm just glad that I got to witness it -- well, the beginning of it, anyway. And after that -- Jameson, was it? -- called me filthy cattle and called you a half-wit, he deserved everything he got and more." Fitz leaned in closer to Lex. "You have to tell me about the look on his face. I was trying to stay awake to see it, but… you know."
"Oh, he was absolutely furious, with nothing to say," said Lex, finally returning Fitz's gleeful smile. "As ill-advised an idea as it was, it was very satisfying after what he tried to do to you."
It felt intoxicating, to have Lex defending him so eagerly, to have such a powerful vampire at his beck and call. "That idea barely counts as ill-advised. I used to do a dozen things more ill-advised than that over the course of a normal week."
"It just calls attention to us, which is something I normally prefer to avoid. I'm powerful, yes, but not invincible. It's generally not wise to make yourself a target," he said. He picked up Fitz's aching wrist and gently stroked his thumb across it. "Are you hurt?"
"It's a bit sore, but nothing serious. I'm fine."
"Jameson said you had fallen under the sway of Lord Edgar. Is that true?"
"I wasn't -- I wasn't under a sway," Fitz protested. "I was simply distracted for a minute and got separated from you. That's all."
Lex cupped his cheek. "Fitz, you have to tell me what happened so I can be on my guard against it."
"Damn you and your eyes," said Fitz, caving to Lex's worried look as he always did. "…He had a pocket watch out, hypnotizing some other thrall," Fitz admitted sheepishly. "I stupidly looked at the damned thing, and the next thing I knew, I couldn't look away. Ugh, I made a fool of myself."
"You didn't make a fool of yourself. Edgar is an old, prominent vampire, and his enthrallment skills were some of the best in the city before Lily and I were sired. Steer clear of him, and watch yourself around any other vampires using their powers, all right?" He squeezed Fitz's hand. "Do you want to leave? If you don't want to be here any more, we can leave. I wouldn't think any less of you."
"What? No. This is by far the most interesting thing that's happened to me in weeks," said Fitz honestly. "I can handle it. And if I can't, well… you'll bail me out, won't you, sir?"
Lex sighed. "You might be the death of me yet," he said fondly, running his hand through Fitz's hair and planting a kiss on his forehead. "If you're that eager to stay, we can. But the dance will likely be starting soon, and I might not be able to keep my eyes on you."
"What, you're not going to dance with me?"
"Of course I will, but during this dance, it's customary to constantly switch partners. Thralls need to dance with whatever vampire wishes. We'll very likely be separated, and someone like Jameson might even take the opportunity to harass you."
"I'm not afraid of Jameson," Fitz lied, pushing the memories of how his skin itched from Jameson's vampiric aura, how for one bleak moment he was sure he was going to die.
"Perhaps you should be," said Lex. "Edgar as well. Vampires who keep their thralls in deep, mindless states are often not friendly towards humans. The only reason they'll refrain from drinking from you and doing as they please is because they believe you're my property."
"Aren't I? You did purchase me."
"You're much more than that, and I truly hope you know that," said Lex. "But as I've told you before, most vampires here would think I'm a deviant for having such… feelings… for a thrall."
"And what's wrong with being a deviant?" said Fitz with a blinding grin.
"…Vampire society, like human society, isn't kind to those who violate the unspoken rules." Lex glanced at the end of the hallway. "Well, if we're going to return, perhaps we should before the dance starts." He took Fitz's arm in an uncomfortably tight grip, clearly still upset about another vampire having laid a hand on his thrall, and Fitz couldn't help the little thrill he felt about that.
Fitz was dazzled all over again by the costumes and spectacle as they re-entered the main ballroom. Lex, however, was scanning the crowd with a purpose. "I suppose I should find someone agreeable to mingle with, before someone less agreeable notices I'm free. Maybe -- oh, there she is."
Fitz was pulled toward a small gathering of thralls, some of them kneeling, some of them swaying gently, all of them with dazed and blissful smiles. "What vampire brought an entire herd with them?"
"She didn't bring a herd of thralls. A herd of thralls simply forms around her at these events, since so many of them are attuned to her voice."
The group parted enough to reveal a petite woman in a beautiful green gown, her matching mask bearing several sparkling peacock feathers. Despite her small size, she had a commanding presence, and Fitz felt her voice before he could even make out what she was saying, felt it resonating somewhere deep in his mind.
"Miss Lily," he said, memories of the auction house flooding back. The logical part of him thought that he should feel fear or anger at the sight of the woman who kidnapped him, but the deeply ingrained thoughts of hypnotic bliss were stronger. Besides, if it weren't for her, he never would have met Lex.
"Oh, if it isn't dear Fitz!" she said, and Fitz felt powerless to move as she approached and laid a hand on his cheek. "You look well. I assume your master has been treating you right?"
"Yes, sir," he said far too quietly. Just the proximity to Lily was sinking him back into a hypnotic daze. He shook himself out of it, cursing under his breath. "I've been taking good care of Lex here," he said with a mischievous grin, grabbing Lex's arm.
"Good, he needs someone to take care of him."
"I'm hardly that hopeless," said Lex. "I see you've gathered quite a crowd."
"I speak, and thralls listen," she said with a smug grin. "Although I don't usually flaunt it as dramatically as you did earlier. I saw that little stunt with Jameson." She leaned in towards Fitz. "And I saw you spit in his face. I knew there was a reason you were one of my favorite thralls."
Fitz didn't bother to fight the warmth blooming in his chest at Lily's praise. "He was about to drink me, sir. I hardly had a choice in the matter unless I wanted to become some oaf's midnight snack."
Lily laughed. "As much as he did deserve it, be careful. Lord Jameson has few friends, but there are also many vampires who won't suffer the presence of a disrespectful thrall. You should know that, Lex."
"I don't keep Fitz on a leash like a dog, and you know that. He's free to do and say what he wants. Anyone who takes issue with that can answer to me," said Lex, and Fitz's heart fluttered.
"Between that and your all-too-obvious affection… you do realize that our sire is going to hear about this, right? I don't know how he knows, but he does."
"So let him stew in his manor. Perhaps someday soon, he'll also have to answer to me." Despite his bold words, Lex's face showed his concern, and Fitz couldn't help the suppressed fear bubbling to the forefront. "But let's not talk about him. This is a party. You've been working so much that I've hardly even seen you. Don't you want to make merry?"
"I never thought I'd see the day when you were telling me to be more merry. Fitz really must be taking good care of you," she said.
They laughed and chatted for a bit longer, until a cacophony from the stage at the back of the ballroom served as the announcement that the band was setting up. Around them, vampires took their thralls by the arms and began to gather on the dance floor.
"Shall we?" said Fitz, offering his arm before Lex had the chance. Lex smiled and took it, allowing Fitz to lead him on.
"Dance with whatever vampire engages you. I'll find you at the end of the dance," said Lex quietly as the music started up. "And, you know…"
"I'll try not to offend their delicate sensibilities," said Fitz. "For supernaturally strong immortal beings, some of them seem quite fragile."
"Too much time spent with nothing but mindlessly fawning thralls and spawn will do that."
Fitz placed his hand on Lex's back and began to effortlessly lead him through the room in a waltz. His dance lessons were some of the only lessons he'd actually enjoyed as a lad, and he was proud of how graceful his steps were, how Lex easily followed. He'd always lamented that his skill in dance would be wasted in stuffy society balls; he'd never expected he'd be using it to weave in and out of masked vampires, his heart brimming with the thrill of being one of the few lucid lambs among the wolves.
And as they twirled around, Fitz could hardly tear his gaze off of Lex's intense blue eyes, boring into him with such intensity that he couldn't imagine any other vampire cutting in. "I'm surprised vampires allow their thralls to dance with anyone else. An unusual tradition."
Lex shrugged. "The mild taboo of it is what makes it interesting, I suppose. The power play, the chance to touch a thrall you could otherwise never."
Fitz could understand the intriguing novelty of that. "Oh? And is there a thrall here you've just been dying to touch?"
"Only you," said Lex. "Although I suppose others here would enjoy touching you as well. I'll have to endure it."
"They're all staring at us," said Fitz, watching heads turn as he glided past, unable to deny the thrill of desirability. "We just might be the most handsome pair here."
"That may be true, but that's not the only reason they're staring. It's because you're leading."
"Leading?" Fitz hadn't even thought about it, falling back into his lessons. "We're both men, though. Does it matter who leads?"
"Yes, but not because we're both men, but because you're a thrall leading a vampire."
Of course, he should've realized that -- every social rule Fitz stumbled across seemed to revolve around keeping thralls beneath them. He continued to lead the dance with renewed stubbornness now that he knew it was a transgression, and Lex kept following. "If that's so, then what happens if two vampires dance? Or two thralls?"
"If it's two vampires, the more powerful one leads, and yes, this has led to actual brawls on the dance floor. If it's two thralls… no one cares."
Before Fitz could question Lex further, a female vampire in a sleek dress that would have been considered scandalous in human company tapped Lex on the shoulder. In a swift motion, Lex bowed to her and motioned to Fitz. Ah, right, trading partners. He curtsied to the woman and took the lead on instinct before he remembered he wasn't supposed to be doing that.
The vampire laughed. "A thrall that leads the dance! That's such an adorable parlor trick. And you're skilled at it, too, aren't you?"
"I like to think so, sir," said Fitz, suppressing the urge to keep his eye on Lex. He'd be fine, he could handle himself.
"It's just the cutest thing when vampires let their thralls think they're so independent. And Mr. Alexander is so handsome, too! You're a lucky boy, aren't you?"
Okay, perhaps he couldn't handle himself, gritting his teeth against the insinuation that his free will was an illusion. Thankfully, before he had to form a response, another vampire cut in, grabbing the lead from Fitz before he realized it. This vampire didn't say anything, but he had an appraising, hungry look in his eye that Fitz found unnerving.
His mind was still spinning with what the previous vampire had said -- that thralls like him just think they're independent. It wasn't true, obviously. He was still himself, still had his own thoughts.
…But of course, if Lex had used his prodigious hypnotic powers to subdue Fitz in ways he didn't even realize…
Another vampire cut in, and Fitz momentarily thought it would be a reprieve from that uncomfortable gaze, until he realized who he was now dancing with.
"If you think your master will shield you from all consequences of disrespecting me, you're sorely mistaken," said Jameson, pulling Fitz along in a clumsy facsimile of dance, with a tight and furious fake smile.
Fitz swallowed his fear and put on a contemptuous face. "Well, if you're going to punish me, sir, get on with it. Or are your atrocious dancing skills my punishment?"
"Oh, it will be so deeply satisfying to silence you forever," he said.
"Is that a threat, sir?"
"It's a vision."
Someone tapped Fitz's shoulder, and he was more than eager to let another vampire cut in and escape from Jameson. He turned, and was swept up by a man in an impeccably tailored suit, wearing a sparkling white mask with blue feathers, gliding easily across the dance floor. Fitz looked up and found himself looking into deep, dark eyes.
"That's it, boy. Focus," said the soft but firm voice. "Look straight into my eyes."
Fitz swallowed hard, eyes widening, as he felt himself practically falling into those eyes, completely unable to look away. As his brain caught up to what was happening, he realized that this was the same vampire who had been swinging the pocket watch earlier, the one who had captured his attention so easily -- Lord Edgar, Lex had said.
The other vampire he was supposed to stay away from.
"There you are. Everything has its place, and you need to be put in yours, don't you?" he said. "I saw your little stunt earlier. A born thrall like you would be so much happier with your will dissolved into obedience."
"N-no… what are you trying to do, sir…?" Fitz managed to get out, struggling against the unnatural urge to obey and submit. This Lord Edgar was bold enough to entrance Fitz right on the dance floor, right under Lex's nose, and Fitz found himself powerless to stop it.
"Your master isn't giving you what you crave. You need real guidance, real power. It's written all over your face."
"I… don't…" He could feel his will being locked down, a cage with no escape.
"May I have this dance?" said another nearby voice.
"I'll see to you later, then," said Edgar, passing Fitz over to…
"You looked like you needed a bit of rescuing," said Miss Lily. "Don't ever say I haven't done anything for you."
"You're the reason I'm here in the first place," Fitz pointed out as he regained his senses. "…But yes, thank you."
Miss Lily glanced over at Edgar. "He had you under his spell, didn't he? What was that about?"
"Punishment for speaking my mind with Jameson, sir, at least I think."
"Hmph, figures. I didn't think anyone would actually want to defend Jameson… knowing Edgar, it's probably more that he doesn't like so-called disrespectful thralls." She smiled at Fitz as she led him in the dance. "No taste, if you ask me. I think I did an excellent job with you."
"You had high quality material to work with, sir." This vampire gathering certainly made Miss Lily seem like the lesser of many evils.
"I don't see Lex anywhere in this crowd, do you?"
The room was a dizzying chaos of elaborate gowns and masks, vampires and thralls crowded together. "No, sir, I don't."
"When you see him again once the dance ends, let him know what Edgar said to you. And be careful!"
"You're concerned for my wellbeing now, sir?"
"Why of course, you're my dear Lex's precious thrall. And if anything happens to you, I'll have to deal with him moping and whining for months."
Lily relinquished Fitz to another vampire trying to cut in, and Fitz was barely paying attention to who it was, nodding his head to whatever they were talking about. He was trying to spot Lex in the crowd -- or, failing that, to make sure he kept his distance from Jameson and Edgar. He was passed to another vampire, and then the next, and just as he was starting to get frustrated, his thoughts scattered to the winds, mind filling with haze.
"Why hello there, you cute thing!" Lady Jessica patted his cheek, cooing at him. "You're just the sweetest, aren't you?"
"Uh… sweetest…yes, sir…" said Fitz, once again fighting against a current of mind-bending power, this one threatening to drain him of his thoughts.
"Such an adorable, dazed look on your precious little face! Oooh, I could just eat you up! I know Mr. Alexander would never allow it, though, so I'll just have to imagine how good you taste."
Fitz's mind, already compromised from various enthrallments and the high concentration of vampire auras in the room, had little defense against Jessica turning it to mush. "Yeah… I'm looking for him, sir… for Lex…"
"Awww, the poor little thrall misses his master! Of course you do, sweetheart. Let's see if we can find him?"
He nodded dumbly. That sounded good. He'd like to be in Lex's arms where he was safe. The room was too loud, too bright, and and too chaotic for his dampened mind.
"Excuse me, Lady Jessica," said a voice behind him. He recognized that voice. This was important. Who was it?
Jessica pressed Fitz to her chest protectively. "Aw, I have to give this doll up already? If you insist."
And Fitz, already incapacitated by Jessica, had very little defense as he found himself looking all too deep into Edgar's eyes again.
"Focus. There you are," he said, with a firmness that indicated he wasn't going to miss his target this time. "Look deep into my eyes, and sleep in my will."
"Nnnnn," Fitz groaned, succumbing all too quickly. He was being pulled, taken somewhere, and he dimly realized he was in danger of something more than being insulted and condescended to. "Lex --"
A hand clamped over his mouth before he could do more than weakly call out. "None of that. You will sleep. Sleep. Sleeeeeep."
Fitz felt his limbs grow heavy, his vision blurring as his eyelids drooped. He was someplace darker than the ballroom, now. The hand left his mouth, but before he could react in his drowsy state, a cloth with a noxious smell was pressed hard to his face.
"This will help you sleep," whispered the calm and commanding voice in his ear. "Go to sleep now, boy. Just sleep."
He was too weak and enthralled to try and pull the cloth away, to do anything but let his head spin and consciousness fade. His last thought before going under was that Lex would be so mad at him.
Prev > Masterlist > Next
Next week, the conclusion to Fitz's little adventure.
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Symbol on the Surface Chapter 3
WC: 2,8k
Relationship: SwissAlps
Tags: Transmasc Swiss, Pregnancy, Mentions of Vomiting, Medical Quintessence, Panic Attack, Nausea, Food Repulsion, Gender Dysphoria, Very Brief Abortion Talk, Hurt/Comfort
“Does that fit what you were thinking?” “I’m…actually pregnant?”
Notes: Tysm to @jimothybarnes for beta reading :3
Chapter 1 here or on AO3.
Read chapter 3 under the cut or on AO3.
Swiss all but runs to the infirmary, wanting to get there before he changes his mind.
He feels stupid for even considering it.
Hoping?
Either way, something is really wrong with him and he has to get himself checked out.
The way he stumbles into Omega’s office makes the older ghoul jump behind his desk and furrow his brows; instinctively looking for injuries on Swiss “Are you okay, what’s on fire? Or who’s on fire?”
“No, no fire–or no, fire’s in my fucking guts and it’s driving me crazy,” the multi ghoul pants, slumped against the door frame. The trip shouldn’t have tired him as much as it did, “like–you know how you’re hungover and want to puke, but–that’s just nausea, but I’m rarely nauseous and lately it’s been just, oh my lord below, you know, it’s like–”
“Swiss…”
“No, no, I know, I know I sound crazy, but–my skin feels weird, my insides feel weird and my everything is so messed up,” he continues his ramble, “and I feel like absolute shit, you know when it’s like a train ran you over? Yeah, so I usually don’t care, but now I’m losing my mind ‘cause I’m low-key scared and now–now I’m here and Mountain’s asleep ‘cause I think I left a lung in the fucking toilet so–”
“Swiss!” Omega’s raised voice finally snaps the multi ghoul out of it. “Calm down and tell me what’s wrong.”
“I’m sorry, can you just–check me out for…everything?”
“Everything?” Omega questions. “Why won’t you just tell me what your concerns are?”
“Because even though I doubt it’s possible my brain decided to fixate on it and I don't want to make even a bigger fool out of myself, so just please, scan me over with your quintessence, or something, and just tell me what you see.”
The quintessence ghoul is currently more concerned with the other’s mental state, rather than his physical one, but he will do what Swiss is asking of him. After all he’s there to help, whatever the issue may be and however he has to discover it. Omega stands up and points at an empty gurney on the other side of his office. “Why don’t you sit down, try to relax a little.”
Swiss obeys, although it’s not so easy to just relax. He tries his best, taking a few deep breaths as Omega puts on his glasses and walks up to him.
“I’ll put one hand on your shoulder and the other one on your chest, is that okay?” Swiss nods. “Alright, then, let’s see…”
Omega’s quintessence flows into him and makes his entire body tingle as it travels through his veins and along his nerves and penetrates layer after layer of skin.
Swiss becomes uncomfortably aware of every single piece of his mortal vessel and tries to take a deep calming breath; it only makes him strangely aware of his lungs, too.
It’s the longest five seconds in the multi ghoul’s life, he thinks, as he feels the other inspect him whole, looking for–
Omega tries to stay professional and not make his internal shock external.
Surely not, it can’t be.
He grits his teeth and goes to double check.
How…?
“Oh…” he finally mutters, pulling back.
“‘Oh’ what!?”
“Do you, uh…” Swiss doesn’t like Omega’s confused and frankly scared expression at all, “do you want to see what I see?”
“Uhm, I guess…” He shrugs, chuckling nervously and trying his very fucking best to keep his composure. Omega steps forward and puts his hands on either side of Swiss’ head, fingers pressing lightly into his temples.
“Okay, let me in.” Swiss does—it’s easy; the anxiety is making his walls lower and thinner. He closes his eyes to focus on the image the quintessence ghoul is showing him. “So this is how I normally see a ghoul, the light is their energy, their essence. Not a soul, just…energy.”
It’s like a vague human-like shape in a darkness, in a void. The edges of the form are fuzzy and it’s filled with a faint colorful light, but what stands out is a blindingly bright orb of pure light in the middle of the shape’s chest.
“Okay. What’s wrong with mine?”
“Nothing. But this is how I’m seeing you now.” The image shifts and…three more lights, so much duller and smaller than the first one, show up in the area of Swiss’ lower abdomen.
“Oh…”
“Yeah,” Omega sighs, “does that fit what you were thinking?”
“I’m…actually pregnant?” Swiss chokes out. The words nearly get stuck in his throat, because…how can it be real? “With three kits?”
“You are,” the quintessence ghoul confirms and the ringing in Swiss’ ears gets deafening.
“H–how is that even possible?” he hears himself asking, but he can’t feel his mouth moving.
“Good question. I have no idea, I guess the best answer is that you’re a walking miracle all over and Lucifer decided to grant one more. Or rather three.”
“Can you, uhm…” his voice cracks; this is getting way too much too quickly, “can you get Mountain for me?”
“Of course. Baby daddy?”
“Yeah, I–I suppose…he’s the only one who–who gets in there,” Swiss admits, making Omega chuckle despite everything. He’s trying to stay composed, but this is a first one for him, too. He’s not as scared as the multi ghoul—obviously—but it’s…tense.
Swiss is absolutely freaking out.
“Holy–holy shit, what the fuck, oh my–oh Lucifer, what the fuck!?” he mutters under his breath. Or maybe it’s just in his head?
He doesn’t know how much time passes before they hear the door to the infirmary slam open.
“What happened? What’s wrong, my heart, are you alright?” Mountain barges in demanding answers; a strong smell of worry reaching Swiss and Omega before the earth ghoul himself does. He’s completely disheveled; it’s clear he jumped straight out of bed to come for his mate.
Swiss just stares at him, though, with glassy eyes and mouth slightly agape.
Mountain gets even more worried—it’s rare his mate is speechless. He turns to the other ghoul in the room, “Omega, what’s wrong with him?”
“Nothing’s wrong, he’s just…a little overwhelmed,” Omega replies. Mountain gets to them and immediately takes Swiss into his arms. “Swiss, do you want to tell him yourself or do you want me to?”
The multi ghoul tries to come back to earth, get himself together to consider the question that he’s just been asked.
“I–I can, uh…” he stutters and pauses to take a big breath, “I’m–I’m…pregnant. We’re…we’re having kits, big guy.”
Mountain’s jaw drops. “Wh–this…what? Are you–you’re not joking, right? That would be really cruel, please, my heart, tell me it’s not a joke, I need–we’re gonna have kits?”
His immediate excitement changes the air in the room and gives Swiss something…something positive to cling to. Physically he is clinging to Mountain already, but he finds breathing a little easier now.
“We’re gonna have kits,” Swiss confirms. His mate’s heart is pounding and he looks between the multi ghoul and Omega with his mouth agape.
“You’re both in shock right now, and understandably so,” the quintessence ghoul says, “so I’ll let you go and just text Mountain some information. I’d like to see and talk with you both about some important things to consider as soon as you feel up to it, okay? Now off you go, I’m prescribing a good meal and long sleep for both of you.”
Swiss doesn’t really register leaving the infirmary, walking through the Abbey’s corridors and getting back to the Den. Mountain all but carries him all the way, chewing on his own lip; he’s an absolute wreck inside, but has to stay strong for Swiss right now. He’ll give himself to all the emotions later, when his mate is taken care of.
They get to the ghoul’s kitchen and the smell of food makes Swiss realize where he is. It makes another wave of nausea hit him, though, and he only takes a few sips of water Mountain poured him.
“I can’t eat now,” he mumbles, “I’m sorry,”
“It’s okay, I understand,” Mountain sighs, rubbing his back as he drinks, “it’s, uh…very stressful right now.”
Swiss nods and empties the glass. He only speaks again when they’re in their bedroom.
“How do we…what about the pack? They’ll notice, how can we–we can’t not tell them.”
“Not now, darling, try not to think so much, let’s try to get some sleep.”
He’d like that—he’s exhausted—but there’s so many things flailing around in his brain; it’s impossible not to think. Swiss doesn’t even notice he starts getting hotter and breathing heavier, but Mountain does; unfortunately familiar with his mate’s panic attacks.
“Hey, hey, look at me,” he grabs him with care to get his attention. “I’m scared, too, look at me, darling.”
It’s a little while before the multi ghoul can make eye contact, but once he does the fresh-grass-green of Mountain’s eyes makes him grow calmer and calmer by the second.
“I’m sorry,” he mutters before falling face first into his mate’s chest. He feels so stupid for all of this.
“No, my heart, don’t be,” the earth ghoul reassures. “I told you: I’m scared, too, but we’ll be alright.”
The embrace of Mountain’s strong arms makes Swiss’ exhaustion finally take over and he feels his eyes closing. The earth ghoul manhandles him into a cuddling position and holds him close.
A feeling akin to disgust creeps up on Swiss before he manages to fall asleep, though. It’s that strange sense of dread and wrongness he knows very well. It’s telling him this is all wrong.
Men don’t get pregnant, so it must mean he’s just—still—a girl in a pathetic disguise.
Swiss swallows against the bile rising in his throat, focuses on his mate's heartbeat under his ear and wills himself to fall asleep.
He wakes up calm. He doesn’t have the urge to throw all his guts up—at least at the moment, he doesn’t want to jinx it. He stretches a little and snuggles further into Mountain and–
Oh. It’s not morning and–
That happened.
The multi ghoul tenses up and his hands instinctively clench to grab at his mate. He’s awake and kicks up a purr in an attempt to soothe Swiss a little, “Hey, darling, it’s okay, don’t stress.”
Swiss doesn’t reply, he just takes a deep breath of Mountain’s fresh scent—the smell of the first days of summer. It’s okay.
“Ready to talk?” the earth ghoul asks after a while, when Swiss is fully awake again. He nods, sitting up.
“First of all, uh…I got that text from Omega when you were asleep and he said it’s not too late to…you know,” Swiss’ stomach turns a little at the unsaid part. He appreciates having the choice, but he can’t. “You don’t have to keep them.”
“I want to, I can’t get rid of them! I love them already, they’re our babies,” he admits and the earth ghoul’s chest warms up at the words. “And you got so excited!”
“I, uh…well, yes, I did,” he chuckles nervously. “I've always wanted to have kits and I want nothing more than to have them with you, but you have to be ready. You can't make this decision because of how I feel, it's your body.”
“No, I know, but…” Swiss sighs and drags a hand down his face. He’s so tired. “I want them, I really do.”
“Okay. Well, then, we’ll do our best to keep you safe and comfortable so that their growing spot is all cozy and when they’re here we will be the best parents that they could ever have. Right?”
“Right.” The multi ghoul nods and…that’s it. Their talk is done, their decision is made. Swiss gets a thought, though, “But what if–”
Mountain doesn’t let him finish, cutting him off with a smile on his face. “We’ll worry about ‘what if’s if any show up. Let’s go try to get some food in you now, alright?”
“Okay…” Swiss agrees, even smiling slightly himself. They climb out of bed and put on some presentable clothes to head down to the kitchen. Swiss really doesn’t want to see anyone, so they quickly grab something and all but run back to their room to hide again.
“Do you want to see Omega again today so all the inevitable stress is packed into one day and then you can relax when that’s done?” the earth ghoul asks once the food is gone. Swiss didn’t eat much—his appetite nonexistent the last few days—only nibbled at stuff here and there, but it’s better than nothing.
“Yeah, I think so,” he agrees, so Mountain texts the quintessence ghoul. He asks him to come down to the Den, to have the talk in the comfort of their own space, for Swiss’ sake. Omega, of course, doesn’t mind and is happy to do it like this.
The earth ghoul gets a chair by the bed for him and once settled in it, Omega begins his lecture. “Ghoul pregnancies are really short, only seven months. The kits come out tiny, but they grow rapidly for the next while and at around six months old they slow down and carry on like a one year old human baby would. It makes it more comfortable for a ghoul pregnant with a litter to carry on in the Pits, not be slowed down much and weaker.
However, this can look very differently Topside. This has never happened before and even though I know all about pregnant ghouls and kits in Hell and all about pregnant humans on Earth, I have no idea what to do with you.
What I know for sure is that you need a lot of rest, no weed, alcohol or caffeine. We’ll be meeting once a week to check on both you and your kits. Their elements will be a mystery until they’re born, but it seems like there’s a lot of water to them. I just hope for your sake they won’t take much earth or quintessence, at least not now.”
“Why?” Swiss asks with a frown. He doesn’t want to think about all the other things Omega has just said, it’s all so…scary and so much.
“Because it would be very dangerous for all parties involved if they got as big as a typical earth or quintessence kit,” he explains. The multi ghoul can feel his hand being squeezed by his mate. “At this point we have to be mentally prepared for anything. It’s a miracle and a mystery, anything can happen.”
Swiss and Mountain are quiet, waiting for even more scary information, but the quintessence ghoul stands up and walks to the door. “That’s, uh–I think that’s it. We should make a little group chat for the three of us and keep in contact at all times. Remember my emergency twenty-four seven number, too.”
Omega stops before he crosses the threshold and turns with a slight grimace. “One more thing…as I said, it’s a miracle. I would…wait a bit before announcing it, at least outside of the pack. As hard as it is for me to say, there’s a big chance they won’t live.”
The face Swiss makes at the words is easily the saddest thing both Omega and Mountain had ever seen. The latter brings his mate closer
“I’ll do everything in my power to help you two. Well, all five of you. I want to see those kits born and healthy in your arms,” Omega promises before leaving. The silence that surrounds Mountain and Swiss once the door is shut behind the quintessence ghoul is deafening.
“I asked the pack to give us a few days to process,” Mountain says to break it. “I didn’t say what, but you know them, nobody’s prying. They respect our need for space.”
Swiss nods and turns to bury his face in his mate’s neck.
“How about we go to the cabin for a few days?” the earth ghoul offers. “A nice week off just for us to think and relax, hm?”
“Yeah, that’d be nice,” Swiss admits and even musters up a soft little smile. Mountain can’t see it but he knows exactly how a smile against his neck feels with his mate’s stubble.
“We’ll be alright, my heart,” he whispers into his ear, “all five of us, we’ll have a little family. Everything will be okay, I love you so much.”
“I love you, too,” Swiss mumbles and shuts his eyes. His hand instinctively goes to his stomach—he’s been feeling the urge to protect it for the last few weeks, but it makes sense only now.
Mountain looks at Swiss’ hand splaying over his little bump and smiles; it’s all terribly scary, but he’s so excited and happy and proud at the same time. He puts his own hand over his mate’s and nuzzles his face into his hair.
They’ll be alright.
Taglist: @arkeusruin @skele-bunny @everybodyshusband @ratsummer @jazz-bazz @mac-and-thefox @karmicbias @wine-irytatus
#hypnone writes#the band ghost#nameless ghouls#swiss ghoul#mountain ghoul#swissalps#symbol on the surface#cw pregnancy
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A/N- I'm running off an hour of sleep, half a pot of coffee, antidepressants, and spite as I write this.
Fem! Y/N x older boyfriend! John Price
NSFW (18+ plz)
"He cheated...again...knocked her up... moved out...now I'm living paycheck to paycheck." You say with sniffles, unintentionally dumping on him a bit.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You don't remember when you started living with him, you just did. You dated his son for a while, but he consistently cheated on you, and eventually moved out of your shared apartment, meaning you pay all bills plus rent, which now leaves you living paycheck to paycheck from the shitty factory job you have that just happens to make you the most money in the area you live in, but somehow none of this was relayed to his father, John Price.
"Love, what's wrong? What has that Muppet done now?" He asks softly as he stands in your doorway, gently wiping tears from your cheeks. It shattered his heart to see the trear stains and runny mascara. He had shown up to what was supposed to be a dinner you planned months ago... before you found out Leon knocked up some side chick.
"That little fuck, I swear... I'll skin him alive...leaving you all alone and broke like this..." He mumbles to himself as he comes into the apartment, closing the door behind himself. He embraces you, pulling you into his chest, upset and angry, not only on your behalf, but at the fact his own son would have the gall to do something like that so someone as sweet and loving as you.
"Mr. Price-" you try to protest, only to be cut off by him, now in a firm tone with no room for argument "Y/N, you're going to live with me for now. I'm not going to allow you to live alone and struggle to survive just because of that little Muppet. You deserve to live with someone and be cared for." His tone gentle at the end. He lets out a soft sigh "and please, call me John."
After a moment of scilence he pulls back slightly, having you look up at him. "I'm not letting you stay here by yourself, and I'm not going to sit back while you struggle to make ends meet. That's not happening. Not on my watch."
There's a small pause. "Talk about little... ...he was never good in bed, and all he cared about was himself, I always had to finish myself and fake it for him... it's a wonder how he got one of his mistresses pregnant." You admit with a sniffle, tears flowing here and there as you blink.
John’s jaw ticked with irritation as he listened to you, clearly wanting to punch the lights out of Leon. He was silent for a few moments, his expression full of anger, before he spoke again.
He pushes some hair out of your face. “He’s an utter fool. He didn’t appreciate you, didn’t treat you right. Now he’s gone and knocked up some slag and left you alone. It’s clear you’re far too good for a bastard like him.” He says in a comforting way before giving you a forehead kiss
And from there, things just snowballed. One thing let to another and you ended up under him for a good while, showing you how a real man loves his woman. You were now his woman, and now you get to share a bed with a man who loves you for you, and God, he loves you. Every. Single. Inch. Spending time, making sure he worship you like the goddess you are. He absolutely loves watching you squirm under him as he touches, praises, and talks you through everything he's doing as he takes it nice and slow.
After that night, you gradually moved in with him, leaving some clothes at his house here and there, some of your older things still there from when you were with his son, other things just gradually coming in.
You don't remember when you started living with him, you just do.
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College!Richard Grayson and his Horrid Case of Pinning
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Words | 585
Content Warning | mild swearing , fem reader
Dick Grayson who you think is just being his normal, unintentionally flirty self as he stops you, darting around you to lean on the brick wall, right after you’ve completed your ever-so-sacred, routine morning drink run. He gives you that jaw-dropping, world-stopping, blinding white, perfectly on-brand Dick Grayson smile and you’re already groaning. Being cheerful at 7 am is the last thing you need this morning. You’re about to just walk around him before he stops you, gripping your bicep gently and slowly pulling you back to stop in front of him before he grabs your drink out of your hand, taking a sip of it before handing it back to you.
“Hey! What’s your de-”
You were about to protest until you realized that his taking that sip caused him to have a mustache of sorts, courtesy of the contents of your cup. Your expression was grim and your eyes that were glazed from sleep only moments ago had not converted to your lips twitching as you held back a smile and eyes lighting up mischievously with delight. Being a forensics major, that slight expression change doesn’t escape his perceptive gaze and his face of confusion quickly morphs into a smile as well.
“What? Do I got somethin’ on my face or is it just my devilishly good looks?”
You roll your eyes before leaning in, Dick reciprocating the motion a few moments after you move. Before you know it, the proximity you two have would have been enough to have plenty of people, men and women alike, getting flustered due to not only his boyish charm but also his status. To you though, he’s just Dickie, your best friend, and not Richard Grayson, the adopted son of billionaire playboy Bruce Wayne. You reach your hand up, gently wiping away the mustache that the drink left with your thumb, careful to not let your acrylic nail scratch his face. Your eyes are trained on the spot under his nose as you delicately do that motion, not noticing the eyes full of absolute adoration that he’s looking at you with. Those pretty blue eyes practically sparkling with love and something else, something deeper. The fear unknown to every soul on the very Earth, the fear that if one day he was a fool enough to confess, you wouldn’t feel the same, and not only will he lose his best friend, but the one person he loved so deeply would finally be out of his reach for the rest of the time. He would fall out of the very orbit of the star he revolved around, you. Once he caught himself, he quickly shook himself out of his mental daze, putting back on that devilish smile as your thumb retreated from the gentle and chaste expedition it had above his lips.
“Ya know-”
“Shut it”
“I could’ve wiped that off myself-”
“Dick”
“However, it seems like someone just can't get enough of me and just couldn’t resist touching me”
“Oh my God shut the hell up please”
He laughs loudly at you before throwing his arm over your shoulder and bringing you in tightly to his side, causing an “oof” to be forced from your chest and your drink to spill a little bit. You grumble under your breath before you look up at him, your eyes meeting his, which crinkle up from that bright smile of his, the one that only you draw out of him, as the two of you walk side by side.
A/N | Sorry if this isn't super fleshed out I promise I'll make it better once it actually is the day time and not 1:30 in the morning LMAO. If y'all enjoyed please let me know and don't be shy to leave requests either because I really enjoyed writing college!Richard !
#richard grayson#richard grayson x reader#richard grayson x fem reader#richard grayson x black reader#richard grayson fluff#college!richard grayson x reader#college!richard grayson#richard grayson au#batfam#batman#nightwing#nightwing x reader#dick grayson#dick grayson x reader
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Meddle about chapter 3
Pairing: Jungkook x Reader
Theme: strangers to lovers, angsty shit
Warnings: smut, hookup, fwb, mdni, maybe slow updates
Word count: 4,6k+
Songs: Meddle about-Chase Atlantic
Heartbeat-Childish Gambino
A/N: Wrote a longer chapter this time as a little apology for the few people who waited so long. Sorry again but I try to upload more regularly this year:)
The next morning, I was running late. Again. I'd hit snooze one too many times, and now I was shoving books into my bag with a granola bar hanging from my mouth, cursing my existence. I barely had time to throw on a hoodie and sneakers before rushing out the door. It was the second day in a row where I looked like a homeless person. If my parents saw me like this they would definitely scream their guts out.
By the time I got to campus, I was already exhausted. The philosophy lecture hall was halfway across campus, and I knew if I stopped for coffee, I'd be even later. So, against my better judgment, I powered through, speed-walking like my life depended on it.
And that's when it happened.
One second, I was focused on not tripping over my own feet. The next, I slammed right into someone, sending both of us stumbling back.
"Oh, shit—"
I barely had time to process before strong hands gripped my arms, steadying me before I could fall flat on my ass.
And of course. Of course.
It was Jungkook.
Because why wouldn't it be?
He looked down at me, eyebrows raised in amusement. "You good?"
I blinked up at him, momentarily thrown off by how close we were. His hoodie was slightly oversized, sleeves covering part of his hands, and his dark hair was tousled like he'd just rolled out of bed. The morning light caught on the two piercings on the corner of his lips, and—
Nope. Absolutely not.
I stepped back quickly, clearing my throat. "Yeah. Fine. Totally great."
He gave me a look, like he didn't quite believe me, but he didn't push it. Instead, he smirked. "Running late?"
I huffed, adjusting my bag. "What gave it away?"
"The fact that you almost knocked me and yourself unconscious."
I rolled my eyes. "Oh, please. You barely moved."
"Strong reflexes." He grinned. "Perks of being me."
I hated that I almost laughed.
Instead, I shook my head, moving past him. "I gotta go."
"Wait."
I paused, reluctantly turning back. "What?"
Jungkook tilted his head slightly, eyes scanning my face like he was debating something. "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable yesterday," he said finally.
I blinked, caught off guard. "What?" I said again.
"The coffee thing." He shrugged, shoving his hands into his pockets. "I wasn't trying to push anything. Just... wanted to talk."
Guilt twisted in my stomach. I let out a slow breath, suddenly feeling very aware of how awkward I'd made everything.
"I know," I admitted. "I just had..." I hesitated. "two cups of coffee"
Jungkook studied me for a second before nodding. "Okay."
That was it. Just okay. No guilt-tripping, no passive-aggressive remarks. Just acceptance. It threw me off more than anything else. Before I could say something else—what, I didn't even know—Jungkook took a step back. "I'll see you in class," he said, and then he walked away, leaving me standing there like an idiot.
"wait-"
He turns around with a questioning look on his face.
"What about later? I-I mean... after the lectures. Only if you have time, we don't need to-"
"yeah, sure" he smiles and disappears after.
Did I just stutter???
***
By the time I slipped into my seat next to Carla, the professor had already started scribbling something on the board. I tried to act casual like I hadn't just made an absolute fool of myself five minutes ago, but Carla's sharp gaze immediately landed on me.
"You're late," she whispered, leaning in.
"Tell me something I don't know," I muttered, pulling out my iPad.
Carla ignored my bad mood, her eyes narrowing. "Why do you look like you just saw a ghost?"
I hesitated for half a second too long, and that was all she needed.
"Oh my god," she gasped, her voice a little too loud. "Is this about Jungkook?"
My entire body stiffened. "No," I lied instantly.
Carla's smirk grew. "So if I turn around right now, he's not gonna be looking at you?"
I refused to take the bait. "I don't care what he's doing."
Carla, being the absolute menace she was, twisted in her seat anyway. I heard her inhale sharply. "Oh. My. God."
I sighed. "Carla—"
"He's staring at you."
I groaned, dropping my forehead onto the desk. "I hate you."
Carla giggled. "Oh, babe, you love me."
I peeked up at her, only to find her grinning like she'd just won the lottery. I knew that look. It meant trouble.
"What did you do?" I whispered harshly.
"Nothing," she said, way too innocently. "I just think it's interesting that you rejected coffee yesterday but suddenly have plans after class today."
I glared at her. "How do you even know that?"
Carla rolled her eyes. "Please. I saw your face when you walked in. You look like someone who just did something completely out of character."
She wasn't wrong.
"Annnnddd I overheard Jungkook telling Namjoon"
I sighed, resigning myself to the fact that Carla would never let this go. "Fine. I might have... invited him to hang out."
Carla's jaw dropped. "You invited him? As in, willingly?"
"Would you keep your voice down?" I hissed, glancing around.
Carla's expression turned gleeful. "This is huge."
"It's really not."
"It is." She paused, then gasped. "Oh my god, do you like him?"
I choked. "Absolutely not."
Carla narrowed her eyes. "Liar."
"I literally just met him."
Carla smirked. "And yet, here we are."
I wanted to argue, but the professor shot us a pointed look, forcing Carla to finally shut up. I exhaled in relief and focused on the lecture, but my brain refused to cooperate. I was too aware of the fact that Jungkook was sitting just a few rows away.
And worse? I could feel him looking at me.
***
After class, I practically sprinted out of the lecture hall before Carla could interrogate me further. I had a break before my next class, and Jungkook was nowhere in sight. Maybe he'd forgotten about my invitation. Maybe he changed his mind. Maybe—
"Hey."
I nearly jumped out of my skin. Spinning around, I found Jungkook standing there, looking amused.
"Jesus," I muttered, clutching my chest. "You need to stop sneaking up on me."
He raised an eyebrow. "I literally just walked up."
I huffed. "Whatever."
Jungkook chuckled, then nodded toward the campus café. "Still down?"
I hesitated. "For what?"
His lips twitched. "To hang out? You did invite me, remember?"
I internally cringed. "Right. Yeah. Sure."
Jungkook gave me an amused glance but didn't push it. We made our way to the café in comfortable silence, and I tried not to overthink the fact that I was willingly spending time with him.
Inside, we grabbed drinks, him, an iced Americano; me, a caramel latte, and found a spot near the window. I wrapped my hands around my cup, suddenly unsure what to say.
Jungkook beat me to it. "So, what's your deal?"
I blinked. "Excuse me?"
He smirked. "You seem... hard to read."
I frowned. "What's that supposed to mean?"
He shrugged. "You act like you don't care, but I don't think that's true."
I stared at him. "That's a bold assumption."
Jungkook sipped his coffee, unfazed. "Am I wrong?"
I opened my mouth to argue, then closed it. Annoyingly, he wasn't. I did care. I just hated admitting it.
Instead, I deflected. "And what about you? What's your deal?"
Jungkook tilted his head. "What do you mean?"
I gestured vaguely. "You just randomly show up at my friends' dinner, stare at me in class, and now you're analyzing my personality like it's a project."
He smirked. "So you did notice me staring."
I groaned "I walked into that one."
Jungkook laughed, a soft, genuine sound that caught me off guard. When I looked up, he was watching me, his expression more serious than before.
"For real, though," he said, voice quieter. "I think you're interesting."
I swallowed. "You don't even know me."
"Not yet," he said simply.
I didn't have a response to that.
Jungkook didn't press me for one. Instead, he leaned back in his chair, sipping his coffee like he had all the time in the world. I stared out the window, watching students hurry past, my thoughts a tangled mess.
"I think we would make great friends" he interrupts the silence.
I blinked at him, unsure if I had misheard. "Friends?"
Jungkook nodded, completely unfazed. "Yeah. You know, the normal kind. People who hang out, talk, maybe send each other stupid memes at 2 AM. Friends."
I squinted at him. "Do you usually pursue friendships with people who actively avoid you?"
He chuckled. "You haven't exactly been avoiding me."
I opened my mouth to argue, but he had a point. I could have ignored him and shut down every attempt he made to talk to me, but instead, here I was, sitting across from him, sharing coffee.
I sighed, stirring my drink absentmindedly. "You're persistent, I'll give you that."
"I prefer determined," he said, smirking.
I rolled my eyes but couldn't help the small smile tugging at my lips. "Fine. Friends."
Jungkook raised his cup like he was toasting. "Friends."
We fell into an easy conversation after that. Turns out, he was surprisingly easy to talk to. He told me about his photography projects, his love for late-night drives, and his weirdly specific obsession with collecting vintage film cameras. In return, I told him about my art major, my stress over exams, and my terrible habit of procrastinating until the last possible second.
"So basically," Jungkook said, resting his chin on his palm, "we're both disasters in different ways."
I snorted. "Yeah, pretty much."
The time passed quicker than I expected. Before I knew it, my break was almost over, and I had to get to my next class. I glanced at the time and groaned. "I gotta go."
Jungkook stretched, standing up. "I'll walk with you."
I hesitated for a second but didn't protest. We stepped out of the café, the campus buzzing with students rushing to their next classes. The air was crisp, the sun casting long shadows across the pavement.
As we walked, Jungkook glanced at me. "So, do I get a contact name in your phone now? Or am I still 'Unknown Number'?"
I huffed a laugh, pulling out my phone. "Fine. But if you send me dumb memes at 2 AM, I'm blocking you."
Jungkook grinned, typing his number into my phone. "Noted."
I saved his contact, glancing at him. "Happy now?"
He grinned wider. "Very."
As we reached the building where my class was, I turned to him. "Guess I'll see you later."
"Yeah," he said, stuffing his hands into his hoodie pockets. "Later."
I walked into the lecture hall, feeling oddly lighter than I had in days. Maybe having Jungkook around wouldn't be such a bad thing after all.
***
Who would've thought that four months later, Jungkook would be one of my closest friends? But here we were, sitting in his living room. My legs were stretched out over his, tangled in the most casual way, like we'd been doing this forever. His feet rested on the other end of the L-shaped couch, his laptop perched on his thighs as he absentmindedly scrolled through something.
The room was dimly lit, the only real light coming from the TV, playing some random movie neither of us were paying attention to. A forgotten bag of chips sat between us, and my half-empty iced coffee was precariously balanced on the armrest.
Jungkook suddenly let out a dramatic sigh, closing his laptop with a soft thud. "I'm so over this assignment."
Not even looking up from my phone I respond "You say that about every assignment."
"Because they all suck," he shot back, tossing his laptop onto the floor beside him. "Seriously, who thought writing an essay about 'the emotional depth of visual storytelling' was a good idea?"
"Uh, your professor?"
He gave me a flat look. "I refuse to acknowledge that man's existence."
I laughed, nudging his leg with my foot. "You just need a break. Wanna order food?"
Jungkook perked up instantly. "Now you're speaking my language."
"Pizza?"
"Obviously."
I reached for my phone to make a call but then I see a message from my father.
Father:"Were invited to dinner by the Kim's."
I roll my eyes. My thoughts get interrupted by Jungkook's voice calling me.
"What's with the eye-role?" he tries to tease.
"Just my father. We're invited for dinner by the Kim's" if my annoyed face doesn't tell what I think about the plans my voice definitely does.
"Which Kim's exactly?" Jungkook hesitates.
"Your smart ass friend Namjoon?"
"Oh these Kim's"
Jungkook smirked, leaning back into the couch. "So, what's the problem? Namjoon's cool."
I groaned, throwing my phone onto the coffee table. "Yeah, but his parents are the problem. And also mine but that's not the point. They're like... I don't know, fancy? Pretentious? The kind of people who judge you based on how well you hold a wine glass."
Jungkook chuckled. "So like your family"
"True but shut up"
He shrugged. "I mean, I could come as your emotional support."
I snorted. "Oh, sure. I'd love to see my father's face when I show up with you. That'd go over well."
"Hey, I can be classy." He sat up straighter, clearing his throat before saying in an exaggerated deep voice, "Good evening, Mr. Kim. A pleasure to see you again. The duck confit is simply exquisite."
I burst out laughing. "Oh my God, stop."
Jungkook grinned, clearly pleased with himself. "I'd fit right in."
"Yeah, until you start talking about video games or making fun of Namjoon's philosophy books."
"Fine, fine. But really, is it that bad?"
I sighed, rubbing my temples. "It's just... my dad has this weird thing about the Kim's. Mr. Kim and dad have a long history of business dealings and stuff. Like, they're this perfect family in his eyes, and I always feel like I have to act a certain way around them. You know, be 'proper' and 'respectable' or whatever. It's exhausting."
Jungkook nodded, his playful expression softening a little. "I get that. But hey, if it makes you feel any better, Namjoon's probably suffering through it too."
"He is" I sighed. "I know him since I was 6. This guy doesn't have a great poker face"
"You got this," Jungkook said, bumping his knee against mine. "And if it gets unbearable, just imagine them all in clown wigs. Helps me get through awkward situations."
"That explains a lot"
"Hey"
The rest of the evening passed in comfortable laziness. We ordered pizza, half-watched a movie, and talked about everything and nothing until it was late and I had to drag myself off the couch.
***
The moment I stepped into my walk-in closet at my parent's house, I knew I couldn't just throw on any outfit. My parents took these dinners seriously, and showing up in anything less than polished perfection was practically a crime in their eyes. So, instead of my usual laid-back style, I went for a sleek black dress, nothing too extravagant, but just enough to say, yes, I belong in this ridiculous world of power plays and social niceties. A pair of delicate diamond earrings and designer heels completed the look.
By the time I made it downstairs, my mother gave me an approving glance, my father barely looked up from his watch, and we were ushered into the car.
When we arrived at the Kim estate, a sprawling mansion that made even our home seem modest, I sighed inwardly. The moment we stepped through the grand entrance, Namjoon and his parents greeted us with the usual warmth laced with underlying expectations. My mother was already deep in conversation with Mrs. Kim about some charity gala, while my father and Mr. Kim exchanged firm handshakes and business talk.
And then, just as I was about to zone out, my phone buzzed in my clutch.
Jungkook: "How's the royal banquet?"
I bit back a smile and texted back.
Me: "Currently contemplating my existence between a five-course meal and a conversation about hedge funds."
Jungkook: "Sounds thrilling. You need a rescue?"
Me: "Always"
Jungkook: "I'll send a helicopter"
I rolled my eyes but felt strangely lighter. If nothing else, at least I had Jungkook's sarcasm to get me through the night. The dining room was an opulent display of wealth, all crystal chandeliers, gold-trimmed dinnerware, and a floral centerpiece so large it practically needed its own zip code. I took my designated seat between my mother and Namjoon, the latter offering a polite smile as I settled in. Across from me, his younger sister, Jihye, was already scrolling through her phone beneath the table, clearly just as thrilled to be here as I was.
"So," Mr. Kim started, his deep voice carrying over the soft clinking of silverware, "I hear the expansion in Singapore is progressing well."
My father nodded, always the composed businessman. "Yes, though we had to make some last-minute adjustments to accommodate new regulations. Nothing we can't handle."
I tuned out almost instantly. Business talk at these dinners was as predictable as the perfectly plated gourmet meals in front of us. The first course, a delicate amuse-bouche that looked more like art than food, was placed before me, and I forced myself to take a bite, despite my complete lack of appetite.
I stole a glance at Namjoon, who seemed equally unenthusiastic. Despite his reputation for being a genius, he was, at the core, still just a guy who had been shoved into this world whether he liked it or not.
"How's university treating you?" he asked, voice low enough that it didn't interrupt the ongoing corporate negotiations happening to our left.
"Oh, you know," I sighed, "thriving under capitalism, questioning my existence, the usual."
Namjoon chuckled. "Sounds about right. Jungkook keeping you entertained?"
I nearly choked on my water. I cleared my throat, trying to play it cool. "Why would you assume that?"
Namjoon arched a knowing brow. "Because he's Jungkook. And you're... you."
I narrowed my eyes. "Care to elaborate?"
Before he could, Mrs. Kim turned her attention toward me, her carefully poised smile in place. "Darling, your mother was telling me about your latest art project. How wonderful that you still find time for such creative pursuits."
My lips twitched. "Yes, still clinging to the last remnants of my soul."
My mother shot me a warning look, but Mrs. Kim merely laughed, as if I had said something utterly charming rather than laced with sarcasm.
"Well, creativity is important," she said smoothly, sipping her wine. "Though, of course, I'm sure you're also considering more... practical applications for the future."
There it was. The inevitable nudge toward "real-world" aspirations, the ones that involved boardrooms, mergers, and an existence carefully molded into the expectations of high society.
I didn't get the chance to respond before my phone buzzed in my lap again.
"Uh yeah but I actually want to presume art"
My mother lets out a fake laugh and says "Young people and their imagination. Of course, she has other plans for the future. After all, she is the heir of a million dollar company"
Bitch.
She shoots me one last look before I look at my phone.
Jungkook: "Tell me you've at least been served something edible."
Me: "If by edible, you mean a piece of asparagus decorated like a museum exhibit, then yes."
Jungkook: "Tragic. Need me to smuggle in a burger?"
Me: "Tempting. You'd get past security?"
Jungkook: "For you? I'd find a way."
A warmth spread through my chest, but before I could type a response, my mother's voice cut through my thoughts. "Darling, put your phone away. It's rude during dinner."
I bit back a sigh, slipping my phone back into my clutch and returning to my untouched plate. Across from me, Jihye smirked knowingly, clearly having caught on.
The second course arrived,some kind of seafood dish with a name too long to remember, and the conversation steered toward future prospects. Mr. Kim, ever the strategist, turned to Namjoon with a measured look.
"Have you given more thought to your role in the company after graduation?"
Namjoon's smile was tight. "Of course. Still weighing my options."
"Options?" Mr. Kim repeated, clearly unimpressed. "Your path has always been clear."
I didn't miss the way Namjoon's grip tightened around his fork. I felt a sudden, sharp pang of sympathy. The weight of expectation in a family like this wasn't just heavy, it was suffocating.
"I think Namjoon should have the space to explore his interests," I interjected, drawing attention back to me. "After all, wouldn't you rather have a CEO who actually enjoys his work?"
There was a beat of silence before Mrs. Kim gave a tight-lipped smile. "Of course, dear. But responsibility is a privilege, not a choice."
I fought the urge to roll my eyes. "Right. How could I forget?"
"Y/N!" My father warns me but I could care less.
As the courses continued, so did the thinly veiled expectations, the strategic questions, the careful way my mother kept nudging me to say the right things, to act the part.
By the time dessert arrived, I was more than ready to escape.
Another buzz.
Jungkook: "Still alive?"
Me: "Barely. Might fake an emergency. Thoughts?"
Jungkook: "Dramatic fainting. Classic. I'll give you a 9/10 if you commit to it."
I stifled a laugh, but Namjoon caught it, shaking his head in amusement. "Tell Jungkook he's a bad influence."
"Oh, he already knows."
As coffee was served, my mother turned to me with a pointed look. "We'll be attending the charity gala next weekend. You'll be expected to join...and your manners too."
I sighed internally but nodded. "Of course. Wouldn't miss it."
She smiled, satisfied, and returned to her conversation.
Jungkook: "What are your plans for next weekend?"
Me: "Apparently, I'm being paraded at a gala."
Jungkook: "Sounds fancy."
Me: "Sounds exhausting."
Jungkook: "I could always crash it."
I hesitated for a split second.
Me: "You wouldn't."
Jungkook: "Oh, baby. Don't challenge me."
I stared at the message, something dangerously close to excitement bubbling under my ribs.
Jungkook at a high-society gala? Now that would be a sight to see. As the evening dragged on, my patience wore thin. Just as I thought I might actually lose my mind listening to another story about market trends, Mr. Kim turned to me.
"Have you given any thought to internships? I know your father has some excellent connections. It would be a wonderful opportunity."
I hesitated. "I have some ideas, but nothing concrete yet."
My father, who had been mostly silent on my personal matters, decided now was the time to weigh in. "She needs to start focusing on more stable prospects. The art thing is fine as a hobby, but—"
There it was. The inevitable dismissal of my interests, as if they were just a passing phase. I clenched my jaw, forcing a polite nod instead of the biting retort I wanted to unleash.
Before I could say anything, Namjoon smoothly interjected, "Actually, Jungkook was telling me about an artist he's been following lately. Some really impressive work."
I shot him a look of gratitude. Namjoon, ever the diplomat, had just steered the conversation away from my impending existential crisis.
Mr. Kim hummed in approval. "Ah, Jungkook. Always an interesting one."
My mother's lips pursed ever so slightly. She wasn't the biggest fan of Jungkook, something about him being too carefree, too unpredictable. The irony, considering how much they admired Namjoon, who happened to be one of Jungkook's closest friends.
As the night wore on, I found myself feeling less suffocated, despite the setting. Maybe it was Namjoon's subtle interventions, or maybe it was knowing that, on the other side of my phone screen, Jungkook was keeping me grounded in my own way.
By the time we finally left the Kim estate, I let out a breath of relief. The car ride home was silent, my parents satisfied with another successful evening of networking but also angry at my behavior.
As soon as I was back in my room, I collapsed onto my bed and checked my phone again.
Jungkook: "You made it out?"
Me: "Against all odds."
Jungkook: "Proud of you. Wanna celebrate your survival with a coffe at my place"
I hesitated for a moment, then smiled.
Me: "Fine. But only if you make breakfast too"
Jungkook: "Why? We can buy something on the campus"
Me:"okay see you in class"
Jungkook:"Ugh fine, I'll make breakfast. Anything for the Chanel princess"
I set my phone down, feeling a little lighter. Maybe these dinners would never be easy, but at least I had people who made them bearable.
***
The next morning, I woke up to the soft ping of my phone, signaling a message from Jungkook.
Jungkook: "I'm up. Suffering. Hope you're happy."
I grinned, stretching lazily before replying.
Me: "Very. Now get to work, chef."
Jungkook: "Bossy. I like it."
Shaking my head, I rolled out of bed and grabbed a change of clothes before heading to his apartment. I had barely knocked when the door swung open, revealing Jungkook in an oversized hoodie, his hair still messily tousled from sleep.
"Morning, Chanel Princess," he greeted, stepping aside to let me in.
"Morning, Michelin-star chef," I smirked, peering over his shoulder. "Where's my gourmet breakfast?"
Jungkook scoffed, leading me into the kitchen where a pan of slightly burnt pancakes sat on the stove. "Listen, I never promised quality."
I raised an eyebrow. "You're lucky I'm too hungry to care."
As I grabbed a plate, he leaned against the counter, watching me with an easy smile. "So, how bad was the aftermath?"
I sighed, stabbing at my pancake. "Silent treatment from my parents. My mother is convinced I'll grow out of my 'art phase' and my dad thinks I need a reality check."
Jungkook frowned. "And by reality check, they mean...?"
"Corporate servitude." I rolled my eyes. "Yay, nepotism."
He snorted. "Yeah, you don't really scream 'corporate drone' to me."
I pointed my fork at him. "Exactly! But try telling them that."
There was a beat of silence before Jungkook said, "You know, you don't actually have to do what they want."
I looked up, meeting his gaze. It was such a simple statement, yet it held so much weight.
"Yeah, well, try convincing them of that."
Jungkook shook his head. "No, I mean it. You're the one who has to live with your choices. Not them."
I swallowed, unsure how to respond. Because as much as I wanted to believe that, the pressure was real. The expectations, the responsibilities, the constant reminder that I had a role to play in this carefully curated world my parents had built.
Jungkook must've sensed my hesitation because he reached across the counter, lightly tapping my wrist. "Hey. You have options. You just have to be brave enough to take them."
I stared at him, something warm blooming in my chest. He always made things sound so simple, so possible.
Before I could overthink it, I sighed dramatically. "It's not that easy."
Jungkook grinned. "Oh come on. If your parents disown you, you can sleep on my couch"
I scoffed. "I think I've suffered enough for your amusement."
He laughed, shaking his head. "Nah, you keep things interesting."
I rolled my eyes, but I couldn't fight the smile tugging at my lips. For now, the weight of last night felt a little lighter, and the future was a little less suffocating. At least I had people like Jungkook in my corner.
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Absolute Submission to the Queen
Translations may not always capture the exact nuances or tone of the original text. Expect grammatical errors.
Blank, and ageless blogs will be blocked.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/88ac3884d5d984658192c0798253020e/665cd914c9f54d4c-9f/s540x810/2db731da213b819ab015925c905077f287955067.jpg)
I did everything I could to help Emma, even to the point of being ridiculed as a "dog" when she injured her leg.
I held her in my arms wherever she went so she would never walk, and I always stayed by her side in case she needed something.
Of course, that may not have been what she wanted, but I unexpectedly enjoyed it.
It wasn't that I was happy to kneel in front of others.
(What I like is...)
Silvio: "I'll serve you thoroughly throughout the night."
To fulfill her command, I just had to bathe her and change her clothes.
However, when I tried to put her in the bath, she resisted and struggled.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/7d410938e584578a1d8bd131cff0d592/665cd914c9f54d4c-dd/s640x960/bd72ad3d17b8ed847ae31ff823c738cda80ef707.jpg)
Emma: "P-Please close your eyes."
Silvio: "Ha?"
Emma, completely naked in my arms, covered her face and issued a new command.
Silvio: "Are you kidding? If I close my eyes, I won't be able to do anything."
Emma: "You can do it."
Silvio: "I can't."
(If I did that, I wouldn't be able to enjoy your embarrassed reaction.)
Even though she's usually sassy, she got shy and flustered when I tried to serve her.
I enjoyed it more than anything, so closing my eyes would defeat its purpose.
Emma: "You said it's okay to rely on you."
Silvio: "I also said I might not listen depending on the content of the request, remember?"
Emma: "Are you sure you really can't?"
Emma: "Even though I'm used to being seen, being naked like this is still embarrassing."
Our eyes met through the small gap between her fingers.
Her face went red due to embarrassment, and that oddly turned me on.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/133a2fd311be705c2240a1e77056e571/665cd914c9f54d4c-b5/s640x960/5afcb1fb2ff983b24ebdcf17f93b837b788b05bc.jpg)
(Damn it. Is she doing this on purpose?)
I felt like I might end up making a fool of myself if I continued to stare at her.
Silvio: "Tch. Fine. I just have to close my eyes, yeah?"
Emma: "Thank you so much!"
Unable to back out now with her looking so pleased, I closed my eyes and confidently made my way to the bathroom.
Emma: "Prince Silvio, can you really not see anything?"
Silvio: “I’ve closed my eyes as you instructed.”
Emma: “Yes, but despite that, your steps seem pretty confident.”
Silvio: “I can manage short distances.”
Silvio: “But from here on, I’ll have to feel my way around.”
I navigated the space with my hand and gently placed Emma in the bathtub.
Now, the real challenge began.
Emma: “You can go back to the room.”
Silvio: “Denied. I’ve decided to serve you, remember?”
Silvio: “Besides, you should’ve resigned yourself to it by now.”
Emma: “Ugh...”
(Where's the soap? Oh, here it is.)
Even though I couldn't see, I managed to mentally map the area as I moved around.
After gathering all the stuff, I returned to Emma's side and heard a splashing sound.
Silvio: "Don't run away. Come here."
Emma: "Eek! Just for today, okay?"
The bathwater rippled again, and I felt her presence nearby.
I reached out and felt something soft, and Emma suddenly pulled back.
(What was that just now?)
Emma: "Where are you touching!?"
Silvio: "I can't see anything, so what do you expect?"
Silvio: "Besides, you shouldn't be running away like this, especially when it's not your first time."
Emma: "No matter how many times I experience it, I'll never get used to this!"
(That's such a cute thing to say.)
Emma: "Prince Silvio, can you help me?"
She reached out and grabbed my hand.
Emma: "My back is here."
I touched the spot she guided me to and slid my fingers along her spine.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/a8d76d5ec03729cdb8f7c44be20185fc/665cd914c9f54d4c-7e/s640x960/5ec2a6bad5f6f04876686f7b0fe8f59b11af3fe9.jpg)
Silvio: "Then, let's start from here."
I lathered the soap on the cloth and glided it over her back.
(She's trembling.)
Of course, it wasn't fear that caused her to tremble.
I tried to move beyond her back and lightly grazed a soft spot on her skin with my fingers, causing a sultry sigh to escape Emma's lips.
(Is she aware that, despite her shyness, her body seems to be anticipating this?)
After finishing her back, I moved on, gliding my fingers over her arms, shoulders, and chest.
Emma: "Prince Silvio..."
Silvio: "I'm not looking."
Emma: "That's not the point... Ah!"
I pinched her pointed peaks, and the water splashed loudly.
After thoroughly attending to that area, I inserted my hand under her arm and lifted her up.
Emma: "It's okay, you can stop now!"
Silvio: "What do you mean it's okay?"
(Even with my eyes closed, I can tell.)
After tracing the lines of her body, I moved and rubbed my hand into the space between her legs, and a different sensation entangled with my fingers.
Silvio: "Hey, open your legs more. I can't wash it like this."
Emma: "I don't need you to wash it anymore."
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/4e775081815f1efe1e34118fe310ef5c/665cd914c9f54d4c-d5/s640x960/f437b358e5edb24fdb982a763e0ee164004a8429.jpg)
Silvio: "I'm still not finished."
Emma: "I don't care if it's not yet finished! You're acting weird."
Emma: "I couldn't bear it anymore."
(.........)
Emma: "Please carry me to the bed like this."
Silvio: "I guess I have no other choice."
(Even though she's acting shy, she...)
Suppressing the surging desire within me, I wrapped her hair and skin in cloth as she emerged from the bath.
Despite being tempted by the sultry sighs I occasionally heard, I managed to carry her to the bed.
Silvio: "So?"
Emma: "I don't feel like sleeping."
Silvio: "Why?"
Emma: "My body feels hot."
Silvio: "Should I let some air in?"
Emma: "You know that's not it."
Silvio: "Then give me clear instructions. How do you want it?"
I fumbled around her body, but she suddenly grabbed my hand and guided it to her breast.
Emma: "P-Please make me feel good."
(You should be clear like this more often.)
(That way, your body can only rely on me.)
With my eyes closed, I took her nipple into my mouth and rolled my tongue around it.
I continued to lick her entire body like a dog and buried my face between her legs.
Emma: "Ahhh…ahhh…"
Silvio: “Does it feel good?”
Emma: “.........”
Silvio: “Can’t you hear me?”
I licked and flicked my tongue to lap her nectar. However, I couldn’t see her reaction as I had my eyes closed.
Silvio: “Can I open my eyes now?”
Emma: “.........”
(Silence means yes, right?)
(I’ve been following her orders so obediently up to this point, so rebelling just a little bit should be fine.)
I opened my eyes and peered into her face, where I saw her sexy, blushing cheeks and longing eyes that shot through me.
Emma: “Please don’t look at me.”
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/9a1d1b4f3cae4b51ee08593dfc870d24/665cd914c9f54d4c-09/s640x960/cfcb3791ef770c8939dba9826963a3e255ee1005.jpg)
(Ah, damn it.)
(It’s impossible for any man to not want to see this face and devote himself to it.)
(This is why I want to serve you, even if I have to become a dog.)
I penetrated her bath-fresh body as she desired, and she completely surrendered herself to me.
(Once you’ve tamed a dog, you should take responsibility for it until the end.)
Part 1╎Part 2╎Premium End╎Special Story
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You know what my favorite thing about Sam is? Even though he and Cas butt heads and don't exactly get along, Sam usually takes Cas's side. It's hilarious.
Sam would absolutely stab Cas in the back, and THEN turn around and take his side.
Kind of like [OMITTED]
8x22:
SAM: Dude, go easy on Cas, okay. He's one of the good guys. DEAN: Dude, if anybody else – I mean anybody – pulled that kind of crap, I would stab them in their neck on principle. Why should I give him a free pass? SAM: Because it's Cas.
7x01, fresh off stabbing him in the back BTW:
SAM: Dean, look, I know you think that Cas is gone -- DEAN: It's 'cause he is. SAM: He's not! He's in there somewhere, Dean. I know it. DEAN: No, you don't. SAM: No, I don't. But, look, I was pretty far gone sometimes myself...
///
SAM (praying): Hey, Castiel. Um... Maybe this is pointless. Look... I don't know if any part of you even cares, but, um, I still think you're one of us, deep down. I mean, way, way, way off the reservation, but... Look, we still have till dawn to stop this. Let us help. Please.
On the one hand, it's easier for Sam not to take Cas's betrayal so personally. He saw the betrayal coming, so he wasn't made a fool of. And also, he's not in love with Cas, so that helps him keep the emotional pain at something of a distance. There's not the same kinda tension.
On the other, Sam has a niggling core... a rebellious-coded "child" who remains vulnerable to authority figures for much of his run, (SEE: with how fanboy he was over the angels+ feeling kinda happy having a past-in-common with John Winchester).
Sam loves to see himself IN the father figure, and he loves to make excuses FOR the father figure. It's one of the most delicious things about Sam (and Lucifer, via his own words about "rebellion" in s13).
I think Sam has a tendency to take the father's and the husband's "side," really, even in that one episode with James Marsters 7x05 Shut Up, Dr. Phil.
Which makes me think about how Lucifer is rebellious in terms of behavior, but says he actually always wanted to belong and please his dad:
LUCIFER from 13x13: No. No I always wanted to fit in, please a father I couldn’t please. And now I’m gonna be a father. Probably screw it up like he did.
AND I can't remember of find the episode, but I know Lucifer starts speaking of God differently after he has a son on the way, suddenly cutting him a whole lot of slack. (I think he does this in Exodus, too?)
I love Sam and Lucifer's twin struggles. So crunchy!
#OMITTED being john winchester ofc#sam will always make excuses for dad#he's more likely to scapegoat dean#THE ONE WHO STAYED#which is also like john in spnwin#getting mad at millie in lieu of getting mad at henry#and CLAIRE NOVAK in angel heart getting mad at amelia in lieu of getting mad at castiel [or jimmy]#fambly dynamics
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almost uploaded a picture of my bank statement instead of this header! happy days!
thanks for the tags @hippolotamus @kiwiana-writes @happiness-of-the-pursuit @rmd-writes
@nancygillianmvp @terramous @tellmegoodbye @freneticfloetry @beautifulhigh
@orchidscript @myheartalivewrites and @strandnreyes (don't think that was a real tag but i'm taking it anyway to force you to love me).
1. How many works do you have on Ao3?
49 (last time it was 46 but i feel like that isn't enough of a difference? disappointed in myself dfhskjh)
2. What's your Ao3 bodycount word count?
1,119,086 which does include some co-writes, but I also have around 200k of unposted WIP in my google docs so i'm counting it (including a fully written fic - someone put their hands around my neck and force me to edit it PLEASE).
3. Which fandoms do you write for?
red white and royal blue, 911 lone star, top gun maverick (flirting with winter's orbit always)
4. Top 5 fics by kudos?
the order of these has changed but not the identity:
Speak for Yourself (RWRB) (you know when eminem said he'd never be able to top My Name Is? this is my version of that)
Fifty First Dates (RWRB) (oodie agenda reigns supreme)
The RIng-In (Lone Star) (otherwise, lone star is in danger of being eviscerated from this top 5 lmao)
(Not) A Cinderella Story (RWRB) (NDAs are hot, apparently)
Cursed is a State of Mind (RWRB) (cursed caffeine is the main drawcard let's not lie)
5. Do you respond to comments?
i try my absolute best to. i am currently really behind and i apologise for that (the problem is, i reply to comments before i post anything and i haven't posted anything in ages).
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
serious answer - Contaminated
my answer - oh baby i'm a fool for you because we never find out if they actually watch twilight and that's a damn shame
7. What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
literally everything else - i don't really do open endings or sad endings! in the words of the great philosopher, skepta: "nah, that's not me."
8. Do you get hate on fics?
i used to, but i haven't in ages! thank god for that.
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
yes, although i have to say i've been moving away from pwp lately. i feel my best smut is written into longer fics where the sex serves a plot or characterisation purpose within the frame of the overarching narrative.
10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?
yes, a RWRB/LS but i never finished it. ALTA is a veronica mars inspired tarlos fic which kind of feels like a crossover at times.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
not to my knowledge :)
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
yes! Phonography (Lone Star) has been translated, as has Baby, Make Your Move (Lone Star) and Warm Whispers (Lone Star). I'm very grateful to the incredible people who have made these translations happen - you are so talented.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic?
yes, many with @dustratcentral. I also wrote a chapter of a co-written fic with a whole bunch of incredible RWRB authors called never the same twice.
@rmd-writes and I have created (Un)Professional Services and (upcoming) Call Me (By Your Name).
The Rainbow Fish was co-written with @strandnreyes.
I love co-writing so much and I am always open to anyone who wants to give it a go!
14. What's your all time favourite ship?
me + my unposted wips.
15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
probably the aforementioned crossover which was apparently also my answer last time.
16. What are your writing strengths?
i'm allergic to giving myself compliments but i would say maybe dialogue/banter and worldbuilding.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
keeping things short. also, exposition.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
kinda scared to because i don't speak any other languages and i'm so hesitant to annoy my very talented multi-lingual friends with my annoying questions.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
we don't talk about that.
20. Favourite fic you've written?
probably still Love Game because the experience was just so amazing and i never wanted to stop writing it.
heaps of people have already done this so leaving an open tag and also a couple of suggestions under the cut but apologies if you've already participated or been tagged 7 million times:
@bonheur-cafe @theghostofashton @thebumblecee @indomitable-love @eclectic-sassycoweyes
@tailoredshirt @vineofroses @liminalmemories21 @mikibwrites @birdclowns
@ladytessa74 @basilsunrise @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut @rosedavid @sanjuwrites
@alrightbuckaroo @three-drink-amy @marjansmarwani @dumbpeachjuice @doublel27
@lemonlyman-dotcom @blueink3 @ambiguouspenny @clottedcreamfudge @emmalostinwonderland
@sail-not-drift @inexplicablymine @celeritas2997 @cricketnationrise @reyesstrand
@goodways @carlos-in-glasses @heartstringsduet @sunshinestrand @sherryvalli
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trying to finally heal my NPD and dealing with the damage it's caused is so fucking devastating
uhh if you demonize narcs please get off my blog before i launch you into the sun uhh this post is kinda long
it just... it hurts so bad dude. and i feel like my BPD makes it even worse because every time i'm confronted with the reality that i've fucked up those around me so badly, i can end up spiraling into thinking i'm the worst person ever, i deserve to die, i ruin everything, there's no hope for me, etc. it's so awful. i genuinely hate how much i've hurt those in my life.
examples:
i've gaslit my gf to the point where she still feels like SHE'S the problem, even though it's literally been me all along. she kept trying to help me and i villainized her the whole time. i'm disgusted with how i acted. my eyes have been opened and i no longer act the way i did, but the damage has been done and i can't help but cry because of how much i've hurt her these past several years.
my friend became used to me making backhanded jabs and even passive aggressive remarks because i always felt threatened by him. i stopped being mean to him like that, but because he was used to that dynamic with me, he kept up with his own vindictiveness and made me feel terrible that i trained him to do that in the first place. he doesn't do it with anyone else.
i've lost many friends and gotten into baseless arguments simply because i was acting like a giant asshole under the delusion that THEY were the assholes, not me. even though they literally did not do anything. my own ego was wounded and that wasn't their fault. i was such a fool for destroying those relationships.
i feel so fucking despondent so much of the time now, and i keep flip flopping between "there's hope for me and i can help reduce the stigma of NPD" and "i am the worst person ever, i'm a horrible monster who just hurts people, there's no getting better for me." my emotions are so intense. either they're everywhere, or they're nowhere. i also feel so much grief. i could have had amazing relationships with amazing people around me, and to an extent i do now! but so much of the lives of myself and others have been absolutely ravaged by my own self obsession and vindictiveness, and i can't help but wonder what things would be like if i weren't the way i am. honestly i'm so ashamed of myself for letting things get to this point.
whenever i would do research on NPD, i would wonder like... why do people not know they have this condition? how could they possibly not know when it fucks up their lives so bad? i knew about my BPD and OCPD before i even knew what those conditions were called, and those are also ego-syntonic personality disorders! so i was REALLY thrown a curveball when i was told i'm a narc. it felt like my world shattered and i simultaneously could see clearer, but also felt so much shame and sadness. and other things, but i don't even know what in specific. bad things. it seriously changed how i viewed myself and everyone and everything in this world around me.
i remember i would always tell myself i would never end up like my parents, both of whom are narcissists. they were and still are the worst abusers out of all the abusers i've ever had in my life. so when i found out i was a narc, too, i felt disgusted not only because it explained so much of my life, but also because it meant my worst fear had come true. i associate narcissism with my parents. i'd be lying if i were to say i didn't have my own internalized ableism about NPD due to them. at the same time though, i get distressed from sharing physical features with them too, so it's hard to really say. it just sucks all around.
i feel like some kind of evil monster crying crocodile tears upon finally having it click that they actually are, indeed, some kind of evil monster. i've hurt so many people so badly and i was totally blind to it. COMPLETELY. to the point i genuinely believed THEY were the ones hurting ME. sometimes i'm so consumed with shame i literally never want to show my face to anyone ever again. i want to run away and start a new life where no one knows who i am or what my past was like. but alas, such is not feasible, so i am stuck dealing with the consequences of my actions. and accept them i will, of course, because it's the grave i dug for myself, but fuck, man. this feels so awful. i feel so awful.
#narcissistic personality disorder#npd#cluster b#cluster b safe#npd safe#actually narcissistic#covert narcissism#actually cluster b#actually npd#.txt
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