#please don’t mind a weird anatomy

[salmonpiffy]

Somehow, drawing these two just laying together and relaxing feels special to me

The pose was reference from Laura Z. Hobson’s artwork

Seeing this first time, my brain immediately thought of Fayetos

[therhythmafterthesummer]

A Helping Hand (M) ~Seungmin

Pairing: LabHybrid!Seungmin x GN!Reader Themes: Smut | Fluff | Best Friends to Lovers | Roommates to Lovers Word Count: ~4k | AO3 Synopsis: After one too many shots of vodka, your best friend confided in you a little problem he’d been dealing with for a couple of months now. Tipsy-you figured that you were more than suitable to give him a helping hand. Warnings: mentions of alcohol consumption · overall hybrid shenanigans · Seungmin has a dirty mouth · pet names · Smut (warnings under the cut). let me know if i missed any💜

Author’s Note: can’t believe my first ever published Seungmin fic is a hybrid au lmao. got a weird boost of inspiration for this after seeing @starlostseungmin talking about it, so here it is ! Special thanks to @notastraykid for giving her very valuable input to improve the first draft, as well as @comet-falls for letting me know it didn’t suck skjdfhsdkjf

Due to all the abovementioned warnings, this story is intended for an adult audience only. Minors please do not interact.

Smut Warnings: this is, as usual, some monsterfuckery · handjobs · praising · breeding kink (kind of) · hybrid anatomy (knot) · copious amounts of fluids. again, let me know if i missed any

Disclaimer: the story represented in this work does not represent Stray Kids in any way; anything described in this story and all actions performed by the characters are purely fictional, this was created just for good fun.

“You–You don’t have to do this, serious–Oh, God…”

You swallowed, focusing on your best friend’s face. Focusing a bit too much on the vein that popped on his neck when he threw his head back, on how pretty his eyelashes looked when his eyes fluttered shut, on those pouty lips of his you totally didn’t wish you could have on yours… All while trying to ignore what you had between your hands, all while trying to ignore the obscene, squelching sounds their continuous movement produced…

“I said I’d help you, didn’t I, Seungmin?”

Seungmin inhaled deeply. His ears twitched, his tail seemed to have a life of its own, it had started thumping against the headboard of the bed the moment he’d sat down and you’d taken a hold of him.

After opening his eyes again, Seungmin looked at your face, and you saw his Adam’s apple bob when he swallowed. “You did”.

“And I always keep my word, don’t I?” You twisted your wrists, never stopping the motions of your hands.

Seungmin sighed, and some of the tension in his shoulders seemed to evaporate with the motion. “You do…”

A spark of doubt flared in your mind, large enough it was impossible to ignore. Your hands stopped, and the tiniest whine left Seungmin’s mouth. “Unless you… Are you feeling uncomfortable? I can– I can stop”.

Seungmin’s hands flew to your wrists, preventing you from pulling away completely. “No. No, no, please, don’t… I… Fuck, I really want this. I really, really need this”.

You would’ve never expected the afternoon to take you here… To your best friend’s bedroom, to him sitting on his bed, with his back against the headboard, and with his legs spread. You would’ve never expected to have his cock in your hands, barely even out of his lounge shorts. In your mind, this had never been a real, genuine possibility. Yet here you were.

How long had it been since you realised you had a crush on your best friend? Too long, probably. It might’ve been a bit embarrassing, but you truly couldn’t even remember a time when you weren’t pining over him, a time when you weren’t thinking how it would be like to be with him physically, intimately…

Although, to be fair, this situation was far more sterile than all those fantasies you’d allowed your mind to wander into only in the wee hours of the night. It wasn’t as if Seungmin had confessed his feelings for you, or you to him. It was more like… like you were giving your friend a hand–literally and figuratively.

Seungmin was a hybrid. A black labrador hybrid, to be exact. He’d been your best friend since you were a kid, when the school you attended finally started allowing hybrids as students. You could still remember the first day you saw him, standing in a corner by the lockers. You’d approached him, mostly because your mother had taught you that hybrids must be treated well, just like you’d treat anyone else.

He was a shy boy, totally out of character for a lab hybrid, but the more you got to know him, the more he warmed up to you, the more you started to see that bright personality of his. As soon as he’d deemed you trustworthy, it was almost like that shyness had never been there in the first place.

He started to come over to your place to hang out or do homework, to open up about his life, and even to show more of his mischievous side. He’d call you everything from dumb dumb, to human kiddo, to little human, just because he could. But it was fine.

Even if at the beginning it annoyed you that he simply wouldn’t call you by your name, it eventually became such a Seungmin thing to do, you just couldn’t find it in you to be mad at him when his eyes sparkled so brightly whenever he used his little nicknames for you.

Seungmin was chaotic, he was funny, and he was the most loyal friend you’d ever had. He’d been with you through thick and thin. Every broken friendship and relationship, he was always there to console you, to hold your hand and tell you it was going to be alright. He was always there for you, without fail. He’d always joke around and say it was one of his lab traits, but you knew better.

Whether he was a hybrid or not, you knew Seungmin would still be the same Seungmin.

Your Seungmin.

A couple of years ago, you finally got to move out of your parents’ house. It was only natural that you ended up renting a place with your best friend, considering he, too, wanted to move out, and he didn’t particularly enjoy the thought of living with strangers.

Decades had passed since hybrids were integrated into human society. They finally had rights, they were treated as people and not some pet you bought from a store–no disrespect to pets, they had their rights, too. But pets weren’t people. Hybrids, on the other hand, were.

Hybrids had free will, they could reason like humans could, and they certainly deserved to be treated as equals. These were the values that you’d been taught as you grew up, and it was something you believed in still to this day.

Regardless, hybrids still had their animal urges and needs, which Seungmin seemed to have been struggling with for a couple of months now.

The confession happened last night, while you both threw a tennis ball back and forth at each other, after one too many shots of vodka–to be more precise, it’d been three. Three shots of vodka only. 

Alcohol wasn’t deadly toxic to Seungmin like it was to other hybrids, but his body certainly couldn’t digest it very well, which usually manifested not only in the flush that spread all over his face, but also by shutting down every single one of his filters. ‘I haven’t been able to come in two fucking months. Two months! I feel like I’m dying, dude. I just need to blow’.

You’d asked him how that was even possible, how he had not managed to bring himself to orgasm in two months, considering you knew he was a person with a moderate sex drive–based on the amount of times you had to stay in your shared flat while he had company over… His answer was a very graceful ‘The fuck if i know… Nothing works, my dearest little human. Porn doesn’t work. Literature doesn’t work. And my imagination clearly doesn’t work, either’.

He looked genuinely distressed about it, especially when he sighed, and his tone lowered. ‘I’ve been checking forums online… Going anonymous to ask strangers, specifically other hybrids, but most of them said that I needed to find the root cause, that something in my environment could be affecting my physical performance, but it’s… It’s really frustrating, because I genuinely have no idea what’s going on’.

‘Have you tried, I don’t know, getting laid?’ was what your tipsy self asked. You wouldn’t have asked that question fully sober for sure. You really didn’t want to know if Seungmin was out there getting laid these days. It had been a little over a year since you had seen him date anyone, and the thought of him dating someone now, admittedly, made you jealous. Which was potentially very stupid on your part considering you were just friends. The best of friends. Only friends.

‘Nah. Can you imagine if I’m with someone and I can’t fucking come? Distress… Besides, I don’t want to just… You know, do it with a random person. People are kinda… ew’. You could understand completely why he wouldn’t want to go out and hook up with a stranger. After all, some people still saw hybrids as sex slaves, or they were heavily fetishised, so it wasn’t exactly safe to partake in one night stands for him. 

Besides, your best friend was not one for hookups and one night stands in the first place. He had trust issues, especially with humans, so you could definitely understand his predicament. 

‘What if it’s someone you know?’ You threw the ball back at him just as you’d boldly asked the question, because spirits always made you voice things sober you would never have the guts to say.

Seungmin caught the ball and scoffed, completely sure that no one he knew would want to be that intimate with him, and not think ill of him if he didn’t manage to perform. 

But you had to open your big mouth again, very confidently telling him ‘And what about me? I can do it’.

The ball suddenly fell from Seungmin’s hand, landing on the floor and rolling under the coffee table. His eyes followed the movement like a hawk–or, maybe it’d be more accurate to say like a dog. He stretched his body a bit out of the sofa, not even bothering to stand up fully, trying to get the ball while he chuckled, maybe a bit nervously.

Seungmin genuinely thought you were joking for a second. That was exactly what he’d told you, but then he saw how serious you were about it, and, after a few minutes of silence, he simply said that you should have this conversation sober.

Which you did.

Which took you right here, right into his room, with his painfully hard cock in your hands.

Seungmin knew you wouldn’t judge him if he couldn’t come. He trusted you enough to be vulnerable with you in more ways than one, to tell you what he needed or wanted, so you would gladly help him–the fact that you had a major crush on him made you feel a bit self-conscious, you’d admit… Like you were taking advantage of the situation to touch him this intimately. But you had already offered it, and he had already accepted it, so you just didn’t feel like backing down on your word.

“Tighten your grip a bit more”, Seungmin mumbled, and once again he threw his head back when you did as asked and continued working his cock. “Fuck, yeah. That’s it…”

You were starting to heat up yourself. Especially whenever he spoke like that, with the tone of his voice as low as it was. Seungmin was one to swear a lot, very openly, but in this context, it certainly felt… filthier. And it affected you. Maybe embarrassingly so…

You couldn’t help but swear under your breath when your eyes drifted from his face to his length. How could you not look? When he was there, letting you touch him…

Clear fluid leaked from his tip, dripping all over your fingers and aiding your movement, intensifying those sinful wet sounds that resonated in your ears with each stroke. You knew his specific breed tended to produce more fluids than a human would, he’d told you this before in passing, but you had honestly not expected it to be this much.

Seungmin didn’t seem fazed at his slick soiling his clothes. On the contrary, it seemed like he didn’t even care at all.

“Like what you see?”

Your head snapped upwards to meet his eyes, and you immediately felt heat rush to your cheeks. 

“I’m sorry, I’m trying really hard not to look, but…” You suddenly felt small under his gaze, even if your hands didn’t stop. His eyes were so dark, staring right into yours so intensely the hairs at your nape stood on end.

Seungmin always tried not to look people in the eyes, ‘It activates this primal instinct in me, it’s a bit annoying sometimes, to be honest. I only make eye contact when… when I… Well, you know…’ He’d said once, very vaguely, but even back then, you understood. 

He didn’t need to tell you in which situation he enjoyed eye contact. Whenever you looked him in the eyes, you always felt trapped under his gaze, like you wanted to submit. And, somehow, it also woke the butterflies in your belly. Right now, that feeling seemed to have heightened tenfold.

“You’re trying not to look, but…?” Seungmin licked his lips, reaching forward to take a hold of your forearm. Not to stop you, but simply to drag his thumb over your skin in soothing motions.

“But…” You swallowed. You figured now was as good a time as any to let the thoughts out of your head, otherwise they would haunt you forever. “You’re so big”.

Seungmin giggled, a sound that he hardly ever let anyone outside of his close friend group hear, the flush on his face deepened, and his eyes crinkled at the corners. Adorable, even in this context… “You think I’m big?”

“Haven’t touched someone this big ever”, your pace was still slow, but you made sure to stroke as much of him as you could, as tight as he had asked you to. It wasn’t like he was crazy big, he wasn’t particularly long, but he was just… girthy. Girthier than you had ever seen in your pathetic excuse for a love life. “Not only that, but… It’s just… pretty”.

At that, Seungmin looked genuinely incredulous. “Pretty?”

“Mm… pretty”.

He was going to speak, but before he could, your movements sped up, and the whine that left his mouth as soon as you did had your insides instantly firing up. It was a completely involuntary reaction, how could your body not react when the sounds coming out of his mouth were this sinful? When the almost canine whines stirred the butterflies flying freely in your belly?

“Oh, fuck… That’s it, baby, just like that, shit…”

You didn’t even acknowledge the pet name that just escaped his lips. You were convinced it was a heat of the moment thing, so you swallowed that saliva that had suddenly pooled in your mouth, and continued to focus on your motions. 

With both of your hands, you went from the base to the head a few times, until you settled one of your hands at the base and the other at the tip. You had heard that the base of a canine hybrid’s cock was sensitive, not as much as the head, but much more than a human’s would be, and Seungmin’s wagging tail and content sighs proved that to be true.

You made sure to pull the foreskin with you when you pumped his head, and your eyes naturally drifted to the sight again. Pretty, indeed…

“You’re so fucking good at this, fuck…” Seungmin’s head was tilted back against the headboard, but he was still looking at you through his lashes. His chest rose and fell with his laboured breathing, he was essentially panting, his tongue poked out from between his lips, and the movement of his thumb on your forearm had long since stopped. He was now just gripping your arm, lightly digging his fingers on your skin.

“You think so?” You couldn’t help but ask.

Maybe it was a bit selfish, but you definitely wanted to hear more of his praise. It fed a pool of arousal in the pit of your stomach that you just knew you’d have to deal with as soon as you were on your own and away from his prying eyes…

“Fuck, yeah… You’re so good to me, so…” His words trailed off, stopped when he swallowed thickly. 

You wanted him to continue what he was going to say, you almost asked him to, but before you could, he spoke again–with an edge of desperation in his voice that almost made you faint.

“Squeeze a bit harder at the base”, so you did, twisting your wrist as you went up and down, and the loud moan that fell from his mouth made you dizzy with need. “That’s it, keep doing that, fuck…”

You worked his cock for a while, all as words of appreciation continued to fly past his lips, all as his slick kept dripping all over your fingers, as he directed more pet names your way. Until something started to feel different…

“Oh, oh, fuck… Fuck, shit, don’t stop, baby, please, don’t…”

You wouldn’t have dared stop, not when your fingers suddenly weren’t able to touch where you held him. You kept the motions on the head of his cock, but the base seemed to be swelling under your grasp, loosening it a bit.

“No, no, don’t stop there. Squeeze it. Keep touching it, pup”, Seungmin pleaded, tightening his grip on your arm while small whines escaped his throat, almost drowned by the sound of his tail thumping against the headboard.

“Oh, my God…” You knew hybrids were anatomically different to humans, but you had never really considered just how much they could be, so it really took you by surprise.

You were experiencing one of Seungmin’s hybrid attributes first hand. There, at the base of his cock, a knot was quickly swelling, and you would’ve never expected how much the sight and feel of it could affect you. Your mind raced, suddenly curious as to how it would feel like if he were pushing his cock into your warmth, how he would stretch you out to your absolute limits…

Seungmin might’ve been the hybrid here, but you were certainly salivating at the feel of his swollen knot in your hands.

Tightening your grip around his knot, you started massaging it, just as you pumped his head faster, coaxing a string of groans and moans and swears to come out of Seungmin’s mouth.

“Your hands… They’re so soft, so… perfect. That’s perfect, pup, you’re doing so fucking well”.

Seungmin was talking to you like you weren’t the one working him up. It would’ve amused you, had it not been feeding the fire that was burning bright deep within yourself.

You could feel your underwear sticking to your skin, drenched in your own fluids because of Seungmin, and the sounds he was making, and his heavy cock under your hands, and that fucking knot of his…

“Seungmin… Shit, you… This…” Being honest, you were speechless. 

“What? Huh?” Seungmin finally let go of your arm, instead he cupped your cheek, making you look at him, just as he started to thrust up into your fists. “I know what you want to tell me. Or, at least, I think I do, fuck… I can hear how fast your heart is beating, pup. I can smell it all, you know? I wanna know what you’re thinking. Tell me”.

You licked your lips, staring into his eyes. You were sure your face couldn’t be any warmer, yet the heat seemed to spread further the longer you looked at him, the faster you moved your hands and he thrusted into your grip.

“I’m… Fuck, I can’t help but think how it would feel like inside me, stretching me open…”

“Oh, shit–” Seungmin threw his head back. His tail thrashed against the headboard, and his ears were twitching nonstop. “I can–Fuck, baby, I can give it to you. Whatever you want, just say it and I’ll give it to you”.

With your lower lip trapped between your teeth, you took in a deep breath, almost shivering when Seungmin pulled his shirt up to reveal his torso just as he mumbled the most desperate “Close, so fucking close, puppy. Don’t you dare fucking stop. Tell me–tell me more…”

“I want… want your knot… I want you, Seungmin. So much, so, so much. Need you”, you emphasised each statement with a tighter squeeze to the swollen base of his length.

“Oh, fuck!”

With a few more thrusts of his hips, and a few more twists of your wrists, Seungmin gave you a quick warning, only for your name to fly past his lips, and explode seconds after. Thick ropes of cum spurted from the tip of his cock, painting his torso in the creamy substance and dripping all over your hands. It was so much cum, more than you had ever seen anyone ever produce.

The sounds coming out of his mouth were absolutely pornographic, they entered your ears and shot straight to your aching, needy insides. Needy for Seungmin, for his knot, and his everything.

You kept working his cock, pumping the tip to make sure every drop of his cum came out, squeezing and stroking his knot through it all. Until Seungmin’s body slumped against the headboard.

The movement of your hands stopped, but you didn’t remove them. The sight was straight out of a wet dream, his torso, his shirt, his shorts, your hands, everything was covered in cum, and you suddenly had the urge to taste it. But you begrudgingly resisted that urge, this was probably not the moment for that.

When you finally looked away from the mess, your eyes found Seungmin’s. His chest rose and fell with his ragged breaths, his lips were slightly parted as he gasped for air, and he was looking so deeply into your eyes you simply couldn’t look away.

You weren’t sure who moved first, maybe it was you, or maybe it was him… Or maybe, it had been both.

Before you knew it, Seungmin’s soft, moist lips were on yours, kissing you like a starved man. And you retaliated, of course. You kissed him with the same enthusiasm he had, licking his bottom lip to get your tongue inside his mouth, and very quickly, you started to feel lightheaded.

Kissing Seungmin was better than you could’ve ever imagined. Hearing him and seeing him come was a transcendental experience, and you were sure that your brain chemistry had just been altered forever. How could you ever go back to anyone else after this?

The kiss was messy, sloppy, tongues intertwining and teeth sinking on soft skin, producing wet noises all around. You would’ve honestly loved to stay there forever, kissing him, with his length in your hands and his cum all over your fingers. Unfortunately, though, you needed to breathe, so you finally disconnected your lips from his, and took a deep breath.

Seungmin looked into your eyes, and you looked right back. They were still dark, still alluring, but there was something else, something softer… Maybe more vulnerable. The stare-off lasted for a few moments, a few moments spent in silence, until you both broke into a fit of laughter.

Seungmin was practically glowing, he looked possibly the most handsome you’d ever seen him. Even when he was covering the lower part of his face with his hand while he laughed, trying to hide that pretty smile of his after years and years of insecurities produced by the now long since removed braces on his teeth, you still found him incredibly handsome and adorable.

“I take it you enjoyed it? You must have. Look at this mess you made”, there was a teasing smile on your lips, but the truth was, you genuinely wanted to know. 

“As much as you enjoyed, it seems”, Seungmin scoffed, and he gestured between your bodies, where you were still holding his cock. He was still just as hard as he was before he came. 

“You’re still hard?” You couldn’t hide the surprise in your voice, nor the way your eyes widened at the sight, and it made Seungmin smirk immediately. 

“Baby, I’m a dog. My cock thinks it should be inside someone right now, keeping all my cum contained with my knot. Of course I’m still hard, it wants to breed”.

“To… to breed?” Your voice was airy, shaky, suddenly unable to contain the feeling of pure arousal you felt coursing through your veins.

“Mm… to breed”, Seungmin repeated, and he bit his lip when you started to gently squeeze and caress his knot.

He detached himself from the headboard just enough so he could pull his shirt off. After a few moments of silence, he spoke again. His gaze softened further, and he brought his hands to your cheeks so he could softly caress the skin with his thumbs. “Thank you. Fuck, I'm so grateful right now. That felt so good”.

“Oh, please… It was my pleasure”, you chuckled, finally letting go of the head of his cock so both of your hands could focus on giving attention to his knot, hopefully helping relieve any possible discomfort he might be feeling since it was out in the open, unable to fulfil its purpose. 

The motions clearly made Seungmin’s blush deepen. He looked at you for a few bated breaths, and before you could even understand what was happening, you were on your back, gasping in surprise. 

Taking his discarded shirt, Seungmin knelt on the bed, right between your legs, and he cleaned your hands, as well as his torso of as much of his cum as he could. 

“Your pleasure, pretty human, hasn’t even started yet. Let me make you feel as good as you just made me feel”.

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General Masterlist

[lawsvalentine]

How They Flirt • OP Men HC •

Characters: Luffy, Zoro, Usopp, Ace, Law

CW: slightly suggestive on some but overall fluff, bit of humor

Cee’s Note: Be honest ya’ll…..would you fold? 👀

Luffy

VERRRY touchy 👀

Mans is literally attached to your hip

If y’all are standing, he wraps his arms around you and holds you from the back

If y’all are sitting, he either has his arm over your shoulder or he’s resting his head against your chest

If y’all are lying down, he’s either laying on your stomach/ass or cuddling you

The funny thing is he does it like it’s the most normal thing in the world

Your in the middle of a conversation with the girls.

“Hey guys! What island are we heading to next?”

Luffy comes up behind you and wraps his arm around your waist. Despite your flustered face and the girl’s weird looks. Luffy carries on the conversation without a second thought.

Luffy is also very blunt with his feelings

You will not have to question whether he is into you bc trust me he will make it KNOWN

Nami had to knock him silly a couple times for blurting out something inappropriate

Zoro

Zoro is more lowkey with his flirting

He will playfully tease you by calling you princess and dollface just to start banter between you two

He finds it so hot that you challenge him and don’t back down from his taunts

He likes seeing how passionate you get when you too bicker

He sees you carrying something heavy

“I don’t think you can handle all that, princess.”

“I can handle myself just fine, tough guy”

PLS his dick is so hard for you sgdhdj

Even though you say you can handle yourself that doesn’t stop zoro from doing things for you

Not that he doesn’t think you can, but it’s just in his nature to want to protect you and help you

Despite all this, don’t expect him to confess his feelings first sgshdj

You will have to be the one to make the first move

Usopp

Mans will say every and anything to impress you shshdj

Just lying straight through his teeth about “being an expert” at whatever the hell you are interested in lol

If you suddenly pick up a hobbie for shell collecting, suddenly he is the shell connoisseur and will go out of his way to find shells for you

“This one is so pretty Usopp, thank you!”

“Oh please, this little one is nothing! You should see the massive collection of shells I have back at Drum Island. It will blow you away!”

This man….

He will also try and act like he’s so experienced saying he’s been with so many women when in reality the farthest he’s gone was a hug by nami sgshdjdj

If you play along and take him up on his offer to “rock your world” you will have him a flustered stuttering mess 😭

Ace

Ok let’s be real….

Ace got the best rizz out of all the men here sgdhhd

He is just naturally charismatic and charming without even trying

But ironically when he’s actually trying to put the moves on you he can be corny asl 😭😭

I’m talkin pick up lines corny shdhjd

“Does your feet hurt?”

“What are you-“

“Because you’ve been running through my mind” 😏

“…..” 🧍🏽‍♀️

He’s so…..

Let’s just say he’s lucky he’s pretty lol

Law

This man does not know how to flirt to save his life sgshdjjd

If you actually thought he had rizz be so fr 😭

Mans is antisocial and keeps to himself

But when he does have a crush he literally doesn’t know how to handle it sgdhdj

His way of flirting is trying to give you fun facts about anatomy sgshdj

“Did you know that the female body is naturally more flexible than men due to them having more elastins in their tendons”

“Ok…..good to know?”

PLS he’s such a nerd shddjj

He’ll also gush about his favorite comic if you show an interest in it so prepare for even more facts 😭

Just like Zoro, will absolutely not make the first move so you will have to literally spell it out to him that you like him sgdhjd

[desired-deity]

Lifesteal Headcanons!!!

a/n : so, I’ve gotten into Lifesteal if u all can’t tell, just got my hoodie today too! Wanna start asking for anything Lifesteal I’m totally up for it but if they do have boundaries to NOT request it. I’m not sure abt boundaries for any Lifesteal member so please don’t use that to ur advantage 😭 Anygays, I hope u all injoy 🤍 glad to be back

Mapicc, MinuteTech, and Jepexx are all demons. Mapicc and Jepexx are very warm while Minute is freezing

Flame, even though he’s called the Immortal DEMON I like to believe that he’s a blaze and loves the Nether

Jumper is 100% a hare, you cannot and will not change my mind. After all, in season 5, she had 1+ million jumps

Little lion boy, Mane, believes someone like him has no remorse for anyone or any humanity left in him but that gets thrown down the drain after Minute and Kab talk him out of that

I feel like Hannah has hanahaki but like- a non-deadly version of it? Idk if that one makes sense but just go along with it ig lol

Kab and Spoke has a strangely good sense of time while Ashswagg does not and relies on others, such as Squiddo to keep track of time

Flame and Clown don’t really go for the kill for a heart anymore, they really only do it for the adrenaline rush now. Mane is kinda the same but he just kinda picks and chooses his fights wisely

Planet is such an airhead that Spoke has to always be around so nothing stupid happens. Planet really only like- locks in when PvP is present

Subz can sleep everywhere but also hates sleeping because he always has that gut feeling someone is after him

Okay so actually I now headcanons Mapicc as a werewolf/dog hybrid because of all the fanart and ls!devotion duo

I’ve got this weird feeling Ro has the anatomy of a biblically accurate angel with tons of hands but only 3 main ones (idk if I cooked w this 1 or not)

Chief DESPISES candy that’s super sweet. He likes stuff such as clover and licorice

Ash’s glitches get so bad to the point to where he can pass out, it’s happened before right in from of The Empire and he face planted. Of course, he was fine though

When Kab gets really excited, she uncontrollably jumps up and down

Redd is a little liar but refuses to lie to Subz (idk if this is true or not bc I actually don’t watch red that much)

Clown refuses to kill Kab because of the stuff she’s had to go through, especially when he found out she got down to 7 hearts. He also looks out for her any way he can at all times

[anasanthology]

Link In Bio

WARNINGS: NSFW 18+ MDNI (I don’t care who reads just if your account age is set to under 18 don’t interact please) oral fixation, solo male masturbation, soft dom!Ethan Winters, porn with little plot, pretty tame, fem-specific gendered terms and anatomy. Not proofread.

Notes: I haven’t been here in forever… 🫣 sorry guys! Didn’t mean to abandon this account I just had a lot that’s been going on since I started it! I hope you guys like this fic 😁 enjoy lovelies!!! 💕

2.1k words | Ethan Winters x AFAB!reader

‘Yes!’

He grinned when he saw the notification on his phone and went to sit at his desk. He turned his computer on and looked up the account.

Ethan was never the kind of guy that was too into porn. That was until one day he came across a girl online, CameraShy070408. There was just something about her that left him wanting like he had never wanted before. (He also enjoyed how ironic her name was). She didn’t really have many followers, but he kinda liked that in a weird parasocial way. It was like she was his. He often tried to block out the fact that other men could see her like he did… Maybe he was weirdly parasocial with this girl.

After a while he started checking her account every night, which left him feeling a little desperate and pervy, especially when she hadn’t posted. He ended up just biting the bullet and turning notifications on. I mean, it wasn’t like he followed a million porn accounts. Really, hers was the only one he followed and the rest was engineering and game stuff. So he decided to take the plunge and prayed that no one would be looking at his phone when he got a notification. Ethan felt a lot better about himself now that he wasn’t actively checking this account every night. (Even though he’d still scroll through his notification board once or twice just to be sure he didn’t miss it, but that he was able to rationalize).

Luckily, tonight she had posted. The video preview was her holding a pink dildo in front of her palm. The caption read, “Feeling really sick ;( but I heard orgasms improve the immune system :).” Ethan moved his hand to sit on his upper thigh in anticipation. It wasn’t until he clicked on it that he realized there was a problem.

His mouth fell open and he just blinked at the screen, hitting the spacebar to pause the video.

No way.

No fucking way.

He sat completely rigid just staring at his computer, his hand sitting tensed up on his thigh. No way it was you. His face was lit up from his computer. A slight pounding in the back of his head from sitting in front of a computer screen all day at work, something he was used to now. It couldn’t be. The image of a woman’s hips displayed on his screen, paused mid-turn to show her right side. A long fine line tattoo stretching from her lower waist down to her mid thigh. The same tattoo he saw peeking out of the top of your skirt when you stretched earlier. He just couldn’t believe it was you. His sweet, quiet, friendly coworker…

You were the girl he had been watching?

Ethan bit his lip and just blinked up at the screen. His dick was already hardening from just seeing your handle pop up on his phone like some kind of deviant Pavlovian response. His hand started slowly moving up to his crotch. ‘This is wrong.’ His hand got closer… ‘I should click off.’ And closer… ‘She wouldn’t want me to see this.’ His mind was screaming at him to close out of the page but every cell in his body just wanted him to keep going. He wouldn’t admit it—not even to himself—but knowing that this girl he watched was you… it made it even better. Of course he was attracted to you, but that wasn’t completely it. Ethan got to see a part of you that no one else knew about. Whether it was the people at work or the people on twitter, he knew something they didn’t and it was exhilarating. Now it was really like you were his. He started to undo his buckle causing his face to heat up at the predicament he was leaving himself in. He knew how guilty he would feel after, how guilty he would feel going into work, how guilty he would feel every time you smiled at him, but he couldn’t stop. No. He could, he just didn’t want to. The aroused part of his brain just wanted to get off, and get off to you. At this point, even if it mattered to him how wrong it was it didn't matter as much as fisting his cock to a video of you. ‘It was your choice. You made the video for people to see. It’s not like he’s watching something you didn’t want anyone to look at.’ He tried to rationalize it but it didn’t make it feel any less wrong… and a part of him liked that. There was something so taboo about this situation that he couldn’t help but love.

‘I won’t treat her any different. As long as it stays in my head, who cares?.’ 

Now that made sense to him. It’s okay as long as he doesn’t let it affect his or your work relationship. That thought gave him the go ahead he needed to let himself fall completely into pleasure seeking. He slipped his underwear down just enough to pull himself out. A soft hiss could be heard as he grabbed his cock and looked back up to the computer screen. Your pretty curves still illuminated his face and reflected on his eyes. He unpaused the video and slumped back in his chair. He let it all but consume him.

Now he was committed.

You finished turning and leaned forward to display your wet pussy to the camera. He started pumping himself and swiping his thumb over his rosy leaking tip as he watched you. The image of your finger gliding over your hole would be something he could never forget. He closed his eyes and groaned as he forced himself to just rub at his tip like your fingers swiped up and down your cunt. If there was any doubt in his mind that this was you, it was completely gone now. He recognized your red and black nails—which he complimented—that you came into work with the other day. The nail polish was patchy from how you’d bite it off as you worked at your desk. He could still remember seeing you try to shake off a wet plastic rhinestone that had gotten stuck on your finger after you had accidentally bit it off. God… you had this horrible habit of putting everything in your mouth. You would be listening to him speak about something and be sucking and licking on your favorite pen cap. Looking right at him as your cute pink tongue slipped between your lips, it always drove him insane. He opened his eyes back up only to see your fingers rubbing your clit and covered in slick.

“Oh fuck.” A soft whine fell from his lips. He felt overstimulated from the way he was touching himself, but he always preferred doing it like he was touching the girls he would watch. His eyes scanned over your body and he couldn’t help but want more from you. He wished you’d show your face on camera so that he could see you put your wet fingers in your mouth. The thought made his eyes roll back for a second because he knew that that was something you would most certainly do. All the times you’d bite and chew on your fingers mindlessly as you worked, reading reports and documentation on your screen… Why would he think you’d do anything different? Shit. Now he was imagining you at work. All he could think of was you touching yourself at your desk. He knew he should stop now but the floodgates have opened and he just can’t go back. His cock ached at the thought of seeing you bent over your desk with your skirt hiked up to your waist. Fingers fucking your pussy as you sucked and licked on that click pen you have while you just stare at him. On his computer screen you grabbed your pink dildo and started running it along your slick to cover it in wetness. He brought his hand up to spit on it before rubbing it along the underside of his cock. After a second you started slipping it in slowly, pulling it back and re-angling it to try and get it inside you easier. It was hot seeing you struggle to stuff your tight little cunt. The video didn’t have sound but he imagined your sweet desperate whines. He thought about your pretty voice just begging to have something inside you, begging him. 

‘Ethan, please. Please just need your cock inside me. Wan’ it so bad.’

 You finally slipped it inside and started pumping it in and out while you used your other hand to rub your clit. 

‘Thank you, Ethan. Thank you, thank you thankyou…’

He started fisting his cock in rhythm with the dildo you were using. He pretended the ‘shlick schlick’ noises coming from his hand were coming from you touching yourself. His mind went back to you bent over your desk as he watched your video. Thinking about you fingering yourself and begging for his cock while he refused to give it to you. In his mind, you could be a whiny needy girl who loved it when he told you no and teased you. His spit bubbled and mixed with the pre-cum streaming from his tip as he sped up his pace when he saw that’s what you did. He just threw his head back and closed his eyes. 

“Good girl… yeah, take it.” He whispered into the near silent room. His thoughts were everywhere, putting you in different positions, different situations. The only common denominator was you, he wanted you. “Cum on my cock, pretty girl. Mhm, do it. Fuck yourself on it.” He gritted his teeth and winced as he felt the cum inside his cock. He wanted to finish inside you. He thought about holding you down on your desk as he pushed roughly into you while you just laid there crying and begging for him.

‘Mmph, Ethan, ‘s too much. Please-‘

That pushed him over the edge. The thought of your needy body trying to fuck back on him while you begged him to stop. The thought of you not knowing what you really wanted cause you were so far gone. He kept pumping himself and soon white stripes painted his fingers. “Oh, oh f-fuck. Mmph!” His other hand instinctively went to cover his face and he just kept stroking till his cock was spent. He just sat in his chair for a bit breathing heavily. He opened his eyes and paused your video. The room was completely silent. ‘What did I just do?’ He bit his lip and sighed. ‘What is wrong with me?’

Bzzt bzzt

He felt his phone vibrating in his pocket and pulled it out (with his non-cum covered hand). He read the name and took a deep breath. This had to be some kind of cruel joke. He accepted the call.

“Hey, it’s late… is something wrong?” You could hear how tired his voice sounded on the call.

“Oh, did I wake you up? I’m sorry, Ethan.” Your voice was quiet and it sounded like you were struggling to talk a little.

“Um… yes, but I’m glad you did. I came home and took a nap on the couch and if I would’ve stayed like that all night my whole body would be aching tomorrow.” Liar. He laughed softly as he spoke, trying to ease his slight paranoia at you knowing what he was doing.

“Well, I’m still sorry. Uh-I was just calling to tell you I won’t be at work tomorrow. I’m sick. Now that I think about it this probably could’ve just been said in an email or text… I’m not thinking very straight right now, I apologize.” He couldn’t keep his mind off how whiny you sounded and he could feel himself getting hard again. ‘Stop, stop, stop!’ He felt like he was gonna cry.

“It’s okay, I hope you feel better. Stay home as long as you have to and don’t worry about work, I’ll take care of it.” His voice was soft and understanding.

“Oh thank you, Ethan. You’re the best.” You smiled a little. He really was always so caring whenever you got sick or something came up. “Well I’m gonna get off here and sleep off my fever. Goodnight, Ethan.”

“Goodnight.” He gave you a faint smile even though you couldn’t see it. He set his phone face down once you hung up and sighed. He looked down at his hardened cock and he just closed his eyes and shook his head. ‘Why?’ He stood up and walked to the bathroom to clean up as he cursed himself.

How would he face you at work?

[in1-nutshell]

Human Buddy Spidey with Ratchet and Misfire

SFW, Platonic, Human reader

MTMTE

Ratchet

He has a love-hate relationship with Buddy’s powers.

Ratchet has seen plenty of humans in his time on Earth, but nothing compares to Buddy’s powers. He gets used to the web fluids rather quickly. It’s just another part of Buddy’s confusing anatomy that he has to remember that it exists.

“Buddy! What did I say about webbing things in the med bay?”--Ratchet

“Not to do it.”--Buddy

“And what did you do?”--Ratchet

“I webbed in the med bay. But in my defense I was left unsupervised.”--Buddy

“Hmm… and what do you have to say about this?”--Ratchet

“I was also left unsupervised?”--Drift

Ratchet doesn’t mind Buddy swinging from place to place. Saves everyone having to watch their step in the halls. But he has to have a talk to Buddy about the sudden drops and trick they like to do in the air. Too many mechs are coming to him and Rung about this.

“Buddy, you need to keep the stunts down for a bit.”

“Aww, c’mon Ratchet I’m watching where I’m going and I have my Spidey sense and reaction time to tell if there’s danger around.”--Buddy

“First of all, don’t rely on that ‘Spidey sense’ all the time, use your eyes. Second, this is the fourth time this week that Tailgate’s gone to the med bay after seeing your little stunts.”--Ratchet

The first time Buddy showed him their webs, they had webbed a wrench 3 times their size and handed it him like it weighed nothing that was also how he found out about their strength.

Buddy casually holds a wrench 3 times their size.

Concern and curious doctor noises.

He does ask Buddy for regular check ups since their anatomy is still very much new to him. Give him a while longer and the check-ups will become less mandatory.

Ratchet likes the Spidey sense they have.

It has saved him multiple times than what he’d like to say out loud.

Please don’t tell Drift.

Misfire

Misfire loves Buddy and their weird little ways!

He loves seeing Buddy swing around the WAP. Constantly egging them to do more complicated stunts and tricks. At first he found the web fluid gross, all for a couple of seconds. The first time he saw Buddy swinging he thought it was so cool and funny.

“Ready?”--Misfire

“Ready!”--Buddy

“Misfire did you drink my—”--Krok

Buddy landing on Krok’s face.

“Aww! Krok you messed up Buddy’s flip!”--Misfire

“I think I broke something…”--Buddy

Misfire has thrown Buddy at Fulcrum.

Fulcrum hates it. He reacts to Buddy the same way a cat reacts to cucumbers, even after getting used to Buddy on the ship, old habits die hard.

“Hey Fulcrum! Catch!”--Misfire

Shrieks in bomb

Krok and Spinister have to ban him from throwing Buddy after The Web Ball Incident.

We don’t talk about that one…

Misfire found out about Buddy’s strength the hard way.

The Wap had crash landed on a deserted planet.

Everything had been moved.

“Everyone okay?”--Krok

“Urgh…”--Crankcase

“Still here.”--Spinister

“Same with me, Grimsy, and Bud—wait where’s Buddy?”--Misfire

Grimlock getting lift a bit from the ground.

“Grimlock sorry in advance!”--Buddy

Buddy tossing Grimlock aside.

“I’m here!”--Buddy

“…”—all the Scavengers

“I didn’t know organics were that strong…”--Spinister

“Nah, that’s just how I am.”--Buddy

Misfire tried arm wrestling Buddy, but Krok has banned that after Misfire accidentally launched Buddy into the wall again.

And they just finished fixing that wall too…

He tries to train Buddy’s Spidey sense to sense when Krok was coming. So far, no luck, the training continues!

He loves lightly pressing on Buddy’s hands to see their claws show up like a cat.

[tinydefector]

Hi Tiny! (First time I’ve asked to this blog, or any blog in general) Not really a request, feel free to not acknowledge this, these are simply some thoughts inspired by the Human effects series that I wanted to share with you!

For one, human doctors who are passionate about how the human body works finding cybertronian forums and trying to communicate info on how human bodies work like

- start of dialogue -

Ilovecatssupreme: no @/jewelsmoneygoldgalore(or whatever swindles username would be) that is NOT how the human body works!!

Don’t try (insert sex act here), you would KILL them!

And @/revuppowerup humans do NOT HAVE CLOACAS!! Guys please we aren’t birds we have two seperate holes

[insert fun fact about human anatomy that would probably scare the shit out of a cybertronian here]

- end of dialogue -

I just think it’d be hillarious to see a human doctor who is appalled going “guys, that’s not how that works!! It works like this-“ and proceeds to explain the human body and our parts

On a similar note, thought / scenario; a human doctor part of Y/n’s crew possibly being interested in learning more about cybertronian biology but not wanting to come off rude or overly personal with questions, especially with the cultural differences between the species they may not wanna ask things that come off weird or creepy, would possibly get along with brainstorm over wanting to know for research purposes!!

Another thought that comes to mind, cybertronians finding human forums with human monster fuckers goin: yeah sure I’d bang a cybertronian, some of their ambassadors are hot / Optimus prime kinda hot

It just seems funny, like I just imagine some people from different parts of the world like; “how do cybertronians flirt? I got this person who buys my supplies and i wanna get them to pay more” (swindle vs their supplier who can seduce who for more profit first/j I jest i jest)

But I think it’d be neat to see cybertronians figuring out that a portion of humanity is definitely interested and wants to know how to get with them safely(optional)

Also just me saying this, Nadia, mentioned on ‘Chaos on board’ is so far one of my favorite original(?) characters in the human effects series, I definitely wanna find out where her attempts at getting free drinks from swerve go

Either way loving the series so far! I can’t wait to see where it goes next, wether or not it continues considered,

Remember to take care of yourself, take breaks, the usual! <33

Oh the chaos that would insure. Both medical personnel from both sides having to sit down with their crew or people and go. " Please do not fuck/frag the cybertronian /human, we do not have the knowledge or resources to know if it's safe"

But also watching the scientists and medics working together to see what is actually possible and viable. Have to run fluid tests and samples to see if it's possible for a safe relationship between a human and cybertronian. But also the sheer shock when both sides find out that their 'equipment' is very similar.

And oh, the forums, there are so many. So are simple as just polls of 'would you frag a human?. Yes or no' then there's the secret polls shared between friends groups with a list of mech or human's to see who everyone seems to have a thing for.

It eventually leads to anonymous role play groups over fantasy, fanfiction sites, informational sites, and even rare hook up sites. Sharing information over their species. And God forbid when the hook up sites get around on both sides.

But can you imagine any medical staff getting a call for help and showing up to someone quarters to find a human and bot stuck together. Medics being baffled, shocked, impressed, horrified, and disappointed.

I'm planning on keeping human effects as the small series I've got going but if you guys want another spin off on it heading more in the horny direction I'm happy to make another. Probably call it Sites unknown or something like that.

Slowly working on the next part of human effects and I'm glad you guys like the crew had alot of fun writing them, and I might do a little spin off fic of Nadia and Swerve in the future in people really want it.

[maikaartwork]

I read your post about art scam awareness and I think I’m being possibly scammed by an artist that reached out to me and offered me a slot if I have a down payment.

I’m a potential client and I didn’t even know it, I thought it was a free fan art for my fanfic but they want to charge $600 total for a detailed work and based on per character. But it has all the signs you mentioned for artists to watch out for.

Bad or rushed messages, high prices, they don’t seem to really understand my work more like skimmed through it but didn’t read it, and they’re eager to make it deal. And I guess the art is generic. Should I cut them off from communicating before I dig myself too deep in?

Hello, thank you for reaching out!

Ngl, it might go both ways - it might be a scam (I’ll get to why in a moment) but it also might be a desperate person that is looking for work wherever they can because the art community is kinda struggling right now financially, with everything going on in the world.

But let me tell you why I personally would avoid going into business with them and what to look out for when an artist account reaches out to you.

First and foremost: you hesitated to work with them. Your own gut is your best friend. If you don’t vibe with an artist, you should not work with them, simple as that. If you don’t feel they understand what you do, they will not be able to give you art you’ll be happy with. If you think any level of cooperation in the beginning phase is not something you’re comfortable with, be it because of the art style, the general price range (please, PLEASE FOLKS, always be mindful of your finances when it comes to commissioning anyone - spend only what you feel you can afford!!!) or even just their attitude, the cooperation simply will not go well. There will be friction, misunderstandings, general bad taste in your mouth. If a person makes you anxious, simply tell them that they are not what you are looking for for the pieces that you want.

The financial part is kinda… sketchy. True, 600 is a lot, but every artist values their work differently so I don’t want to make an assumption only based on that. What worries me more is that they reached out to you first with such a high quote and were not immediately transparent about it. I don’t know if you advertised a need for an artist, but if you didn’t, that is even more worrisome. If you feel their style doesn’t match the admittedly high price point, don’t bother - I’d like to reiterate the need for good vibes and that goes to the art style, too. I’ve never been on the client part of things, but I, as a person, would never go for something this expensive that I didn’t specifically ask for.

WHAT TO LOOK OUT FOR IN ACCOUNTS YOU THINK ARE SKETCHY:

Go through their artwork - is it cohesive? Is the art style the same or at least recognizable as the same person’s work? Does the artwork have the artist’s signature? If the answer to any of these is “no”, give benefit of the doubt but be very wary. They might be still figuring themselves out (but then they wouldn’t probably be this expensive) but: There are accounts that steal art, there are accounts that pretend to be someone else and, off to my next red flag:

There are accounts that use AI to generate artwork. Now I could make a whole separate st about AI-generated artwork and I do openly admit that I am extremely against it on many, many levels. But I will only say this: if you don’t want AI art, you can watch out for very specific indicators of AI-generated art: weird anatomy, especially in art that looks like it’s been made by an experienced artist that should know how anatomy and movement should work (wrong amount of fingers, too long bodies, impossible angles, etc), elements blending together, like parts of clothing suddenly blending into the background, extremely inconsistent lighting or linework, mesh of different art styles, especially between background and foreground (where there shouldn’t be any), any sort of writing that doesn’t make sense… These days it’s harder and harder to recognize, especially for non-artists, so don’t feel bad if you have no idea if something is AI or not.

There are weird links in their bio or their bio generally doesn’t make sense. A respectable artist will have ANY sort of info about themselves or what they do in the bio, especially if they do paid commissions. Artists often have links to other social media, to a linkdtree or carrd (small websites that are directories to their other internet places) or shop adresses like etsy, redbubble, artstation, inprint and so on. But if you see http-sketchy-bunch-of-letters-dot-com or http-brand-name-dot-com - please, for the love of forest pixies, do not click it. If their bio says something generic like, dunno, “life is light and joy” and nothing else? That fella is not there to make serious, respectful business. At best they are there casually, at worst - they are auto-generated throwaway accounts

How far back do their posts go? Is it in days, weeks, months or years? Throwaway accounts usually don’t have posts older than a few months, up to half a year at most, as they are set up in bulk for future scamming. Usually the older posts don’t match the newer ones and there are multiple posts on the first week, because those accounts are set up very generically for various types of scams.

If you decide to go down the rabbit hole of checking them further and actually have conversation with them: ask them about the process of commissioning. If they reached out to you with a substantial quote, they probably know what they’re doing, right? So they should have it all figured out, tell you exactly how their process works, not just the money part. The less they want to tell you outside of finances, the less they want to answer your questions, the more chance there is they’re just there for cashgrab. If they’re a scammer, they will not want to waste time on you, they will not answer any in-depth questions or rush through them. Worst that can happen is you’ll take up some time of a scammer that they could otherwise use to scam someone else, to if you’re into that sort of thing, go have your fun ;)))

Ask them why they want to get commissioned by you - they should have some favorite parts of your fics or something that pulled them to you. Or just be honest and open and say - I am looking for work anywhere or - I am a professional artist that is reaching out to people that might be interested in having artwork done. If they’re sketchy or super vague about that answer, if they are making stuff up or trying too hard to seem like they ✨know you✨ - be mindful!!!

So in conclusion: if I were you, I would not work with them. There are too many red flags in my opinion, the biggest one of them is that they made you wonder if you are being scammed. Personally I’d search for someone that knows your fandom, is a member of a community you know or that a friend of yours commissioned that they swear by. Or simply: someone whose style you love. Don’t get bullied into loosing money on something you didn’t ask for. You are an artist in your own right and your art deserves something that will highlight it. You deserve better than what you feel is generic.

If you, as writers or just commissioners, are interested in a post on how to look for a good commission artist and how to work with them, you can let me know, I can whip something up for you ;)

[loverboy-cc]

Mark me as yours

Kinktober day no. 4

“Are you okay..?” “Yes- well… No, but I don’t want you to feel obligated to help me.”

Pairing: Dan Heng il/cis fem sub reader

CWs: inhuman genitals, breeding, tiny amount of hurt/comfort (but mostly fluff)

AN: Reader is explicitly referred to as a girl, and I reference afab anatomy more than once, PLEASE keep this in mind. For @starrry-angel

Kinktober masterlist

Prior to the whole affair on the Luofu Dan Heng often swung between not needing affection and clinging to you like his life depended on it. He explained it as him occasionally realizing that he no longer has to just cope with his loneliness since he began dating you.

Since his return though, he’s been considerably more distant. For the first week or so you wrote it off as him recovering from an extremely stressful event. But as the days passed by and he became more and more distant, you found yourself worrying more.

That’s what led you to your current position, standing in front of the door to the archives. You speak softly as you start to open the door.

“… Dan Heng?”

The door to the archives was locked, and the light was off. Which was strange in its own right, as much as Dan Heng preferred people avoid hanging around in the archives; he never locked the door.

“Looking for Dan Heng? I saw him run off to his room a while back, his horns were all glowy too. It was really weird.”

Caelus’ voice knocked you out of your thoughts, only to confuse you even further.

“I didn’t know he had a room?”

“March said she’s only seen him go in there once since she’s been on the express. If you hear from him let me know he’s ok. I’m pretty sure he thinks I’m mad at him? It’s the end of the hall on the 3rd train car.”

Caelus sighed and continued to wherever he was originally headed. It was hard not to sprint down the halls of the express as you made your way to his room. Worry for his well being seeping into you.

It was strange, listening to him pace around the room through the door. Its a noise you’d gotten accustomed to hearing late at night after he’d called you to his room hoping for company following one of many nightmares.

You raise your hand to knock, but before you can he locks it.

“Leave… please.”

The intended strength behind the words comes across more as a painful admittance then a command.

“Not until you tell me what’s going on, we don’t have to talk about it right now but… I just need to know that you’re okay.”

There’s an agonizingly long pause before you hear him sigh and unlock the door. Hesitating for a moment before pulling it open. He’s in his vidyadhara form, his tail flicking anxiously behind him as he watches you, his moments stiff.

“I’m… sorry.”

His voice is uncharacteristically shaky as he steps to the side, his room is barren of any identifying features. He hesitates after closing the door.

“Can I lock the door?”

You nod slowly and he does as he asked. Standing stock still in front of the now locked door, stepping back into it as you approach him slowly.

“Are you okay..?”

“Yes- well… No, but I don’t want you to feel obligated to help me.”

He tries to sink further into the wall as you step closer

“Please, Dan Heng. I just want to know what’s going on, I’m worried about you.”

He sighs and seems to look through you for a moment, before attempting to collect himself, though his voice continues its uneven tone.

“I’m a vidyadhara, you know that at this point… Despite not being physically able to reproduce we still have a… heat cycle. Mine is inconsistent because of my distance from the Luofu but…”

He squirms in place and looks away from you.

“My instincts are convinced you’re my mate, and with my heat cycle starting I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable...”

“What if I want to be your mate?”

He looks nothing short of appalled, and you watch a series of micro expressions flicker across his face in quick succession before he’s clinging to you. Mumbling an apology into your chest as he picks you up.

You feel his chest rumble as you return the hug, piecing together that he was purring as he set you gingerly on his bed. Situation himself between your legs as he looks at you for any signs of resistance once more. The corners of his mouth pulling into a small smile when there is none.

The weight of his tail wrapping itself around your waist is a comforting pressure as he nuzzles into your neck. Purring as he bites your shoulder gently. His sharp canines digging into the soft flesh just enough to leave a mark.

“I’m sorry for my impatience I… I’ve missed you and I…”

He hesitates and buries his face back into your neck for a moment.

“I need to feel you. I’ve been waiting so long to claim you as mine and now that you’re here I can’t wait anymore.”

He shudders and kisses you as his movements become less restrained, quickly pulling off your loose shirt along with his own. Every action drips with desperation as he pulls you impossibly closer.

“Can I touch you..?”

Your voice seems to pull him out of his haze and he leans back far enough for you to be able to admire him. His lithe frame speckled with small scales.

Pulling his underwear down you were met with an interesting sight.

You hadn’t thought very hard about the draconic features of the Vidyadhara, and in hindsight you kinda wish you had. Watching the pair of slick, semi translucent dicks slide out of the scaled slit on Dan Heng’s body as he squirmed under your gaze was certainly an interesting experience.

He didn’t give you long to think about it though as he gently pushed you back down onto the bed. Moving your underwear to the side enough to push his fingers past your slick folds. His thumb toying with your clit as he worked you open for him.

After he decided you were prepared enough he pulled his fingers out of you, licking your slick off of his fingers with his long, forked tongue. As you watched him clean his digits your brain provided you with the lovely image that was said tongue licking eagerly at your drooling slit.

All coherent thought was pushed from your brain as Dan Heng pressed the tip of one of his cocks against your eager hole, purring into your shoulder as he sunk into you inch by inch. His other cock bumping your clit as he bottomed out, his entire body tense above you as he waited for you to adjust.

He groaned into your chest as he began to move, mumbling into soft flesh as he rolled his hips against yours.

“I can’t wait to fuck you full of my kin, you’ll be good and take it right?”

© pvbbyboy •• 2023 •• Please do not translate/repost. reblogs are appreciated and requests are open!

~~

Taglist: @yarnnerdally • @yeonpm

Wanna be added? Send me an ask off anon and lmk if you want to be on the sfw only list!

[aldisobey]

WIP Word Game!

Always love a tag, and I seriously appreciate it @caffeinatedmunchkin (and also @ollypopwrites because this is the actual game you had tagged me in before). Alright here we go. I’m letting myself be messy here.

Rules:

You will be given a word. Then you share one sentence/excerpt from your WIP(s) that start with each letter of your word.

My key word was S a t i n

I’m breaking the rules and giving you ‘cut content’. I’m toiling over wips in a weird way. I don’t know how else to let some of this see light of day and I’m taking the opportunity to make this what I want. Because these are fun…uh, character studies? These are bits I want to get at, these are things that are true and real for the characters, but I don’t know if I’ll ever have time to flesh it out. They all need editing okay but have fun, here is some writing process, these are all technically 'wips'. You could say they are different stages of stories or scenes. S - is from Nevarran Noble Anatomy, currently dropped shortfic A - is a pulled paragraph from post-epilogue I'm still looking at T - is a silly I - is a look at a dialogue first draft N - is a flowy first draft.

------------------------------

“See that ya shits? The fuck you think might happen if dead tissue gets in there hmmm? You gonna explain that one to dear old Professor ‘I’m not taking more than ten students’ Volkarin that you killed his lover?” Rook’s entire body went red. “Think that’ll help ya make the list?” the botanist was snapping and pointing her fingers, “Yeah and you! I know your family is gonna have a goddamn inheritance war if you can’t find a competent corpse whisper. Mother’s knickers. Idiots.” “Well he can’t be more than a paramour. A proper Nevarran Necromancer would never fail to lavish a lover.” The noble’s jangling limbs gestured to the bare arms of the Warden, smirk on his face as he sneered towards Emmrich. Rook hopped off the examination table with a heavy thump, slammed that muscled weight down, and strode over to that noble. Spit on his shoe. Locked eyes on the shocked countenance before him as he hissed out a, “Hey, darling dearest heart, can I have a knife back. Please. Time for the practical demonstration. I can show where to stab so he’ll live.” “Rook, I think it’s time we took our leave.” Emmrich finally spoke, voice hushed. Rook leaned forward and grinned wide, “I don’t wear rings for a reason, want to see why?” Smile too wide the Warden extended his hand as if in greeting. The laborious movement drew the eye. Bent, bruised, one could tell numerous bones had healed incorrectly. Movements were stiff, cracking, fresh cuts and life long calluses ran the surface. Menacing. It held an air of strength that promised instant injury if the brat dared lay his own there. Emmrich paused overlong. Mind reeling. Rook didn’t know it, but he faced someone with royal connections. And the necromancer knew that stance, this silence. The gathered Nevarrans might think it acting, bravado. But Rook was still. Quiet. Loose. Every nerve primed for movement. He’d kill that man. And for a moment…Emmrich considered letting that happen. Rook didn’t need the knives. Normally the Warden was kind, de-escalating, talking things out if possible. But the moment a threat appeared he removed it. Mercilessly. And Rook wasn’t wrong, a man such as this would be a threat. But only alone, only if Emmrich were to disappear. This was no trouble, this was a fight won by Professor Volkarin long ago. Emmrich smiled pleasantly and swept in between them, back to the student, took hold of Rook’s outstretched hand in both of his, gave it a gentle squeeze, raised it to his lips and held it there as he cooled the Warden’s gaze in the depths of his longing stare. “You needn’t sully your hands darling.” Emmrich spoke slow into the knuckles. One would think the room had emptied but for the two of them. The professor dropped their hands from his lips, twined his fingers with Rooks, and held firm as he drew the rogue away with a gentle pull, “Come, we have a reservation to make.” Smiling dumb Rook let himself be taken away, threw a bright laugh at the noble over his shoulder. “Ooh, those undead cooks again?” “If you desire it dearest.” And they were gone. Rook forgot his shirt.

------------------------------

All Rook’s build. Close as possible. Venatori freshly caught. Spaces of the Necropolis were his alone. The peers that dubbed him ‘young Volkarin’ would be the only few that could check, possibly even see. And their attentions were elsewhere for decades. He could keep them here alive. Long as their lives might permit. Had to remain alive. Material. Simple reagents. The shift in Emmrich’s mind came crashing. He’d saved these men. Had saved many in the chaos of the aftermath. They would be dead without him. The moments of life left were owed.

------------------------------

“Turlum!!” Rook throws a truffle at Davrin, and with a squawk and a ‘dammit Rook’ Davrin never gets to finish the joke he started as he’s smothered in a rush of fur and feathers.

------------------------------

“It…it’s that, but Emmrich it’s mostly not. I’m worried about you.” -this is Harding- “And Rook.” -taash- “And Rook. But Emmrich look at where we’re at. Why did you want to go to the Deep Roads?” “You’re a bad liar” -taash shrug- “Taash, not helping. But they're right. You’re studying the Blight aren’t you?” “And what of it? I’m researching a cure. Harding. It’s changed. Who knows what it will be tomorrow, someone must endeavor to understand it.” -Emmrich- “Should that someone be you? You might be too close. Maybe…maybe just enjoy what you got with Rook now? And if that blight stuff ever changes I’m sure you’ll figure it out.”

------------------------------

Night never really came to the Lighthouse. The name alone forbid it. Yet dusk arrived. The pots and pans washed and returned, baths steaming but empty, and the warmth of quiet wrapped the near atmosphere. Rook sat on the floor of Emmrich’s study. Cross legged and hunched on a plush rug before the fire, book propped by a pillow before him. The rug was relatively new. Rook had protested. Floor’s fine! I’ve called worse a bed. Sincerity rang in laughter and a chair sat empty across the room so it must be a preference. But Emmrich had taken it upon himself to see to some comforts. Smiled soft from his desk now as he peered up to see it in use. Recalled it’s christening. Oh pretty! Boots had gone flying the first time Rook spotted it, clothes nearly followed but quick words halted the excess, Emmrich, it was a long day in Arlathan, I don’t want to get twigs in it. Emmrich had ‘nearly’ rolled his eyes at that one. Taken Rook by the shoulders and pushed him to it. Darling, I’m a mage, tidying the thing is a triviality. Please. Rook needed no further encouragement, spun in Emmrich’s hands, placed a peck on his nose, and fell back starfished onto the rug. Landed with a loud thud. Barefoot, grinning, and stretching like a mabari in the mud the rogue sank into the fine fibers sighing. That had been some weeks ago. A few pillows and stacks of books surrounded it now. Rook’s back warmed by the fireplace, furrowed brow visible to Emmrich at his desk. The Warden snorted, almost a laugh, shook his head, brow smoothed and smirking he turned the page. “An error darling?” “Hmm?” Rook didn’t catch it at first. Mind taking a moment to shift from realm of reading thought to listening ear. Blinked as those warm round eyes flicked up to the necromancer. “Oh!” It clicked then and Rook chuckled. “It’s entertaining, but they talk too much in the fights.”

------------------------------

All my moots have been tagged from what I've seen. Okay I haven't seen I'm just not sure who to go to and am crippled by perception and want to throw this out before I don't. use BONES if you see this and want to throw something at me.

[watching-sam-and-dean-again]

Sam & Dean are, in fact, soulmates

It’s rant time again! (Sorry)

I saw an idiotic interesting take on Twitter last night where someone claimed that Sam and Dean aren’t soulmates, and that they couldn’t understand how anyone could interpret it that way (particularly referring to "Dark Side of the Moon"). And they actually wondered what show soulmate-truthers (my term) were watching.

Umm, the actual show?

I’ve paraphrased the comment slightly and replies slightly, and I’m not posting a pic of the actual post, because I’m going to try not do that on this blog, but also, this person is just like the others in the replies (and in fandom) who “interpret” the show a certain way because it suits their destiel narrative. They all drank the cool-aid, so why single one out? At the same time, this take shows so little media literacy that it pisses me off. Thus, the rant.

Please do read on if you’re interested.

One argument I saw under this tweet was that Dean needed to find a road to lead him to Sam, so it proves they weren’t in the same heaven.

Wrong.

If they weren’t in the same heaven, Dean wouldn’t have been able to find Sam. Period. We know this because Ash has to do a little spell thing in order for them to leave their heaven (“Winchester Land”) at all. They can’t just jump heavens on their own. We also see this in later seasons. People just don’t hop into each others’ heavens without some sort of help.

Another stupid argument I saw is that Sam and Dean can’t be soulmates because "they’re BROTHERS!”

Wrong Again!

While having a soulmate is often (maybe even most often) seen as a romantic trope, being soulmates is actually not inherently romantic. Let’s even just stay on the WB/CW level for this one for a minute. Dawson and Joey consider themselves soulmates in Dawson’s Creek, but they don’t make a good couple, they work better as friends, and they don’t end up together. While they aren’t entirely platonic, them being soulmates ultimately isn’t about romantic love either. Sorry, I stumbled onto a reactor watching this show lately, so it’s fresh in my mind. You could also make arguments for Xander and Willow, Joey and Phoebe, or Christina and Meredith (Grey’s Anatomy calls it “my person” being science-based, but it amounts to the same thing). Ultimately, being soulmates just means two people have an incredibly close bond, love each other dearly, understand each other on a deeper level than most, and often need each other. Despite what some hellers think, not all love and closeness is sexual or romantic. Finally, if someone sees being soulmates as having to be romantic, they should probably take it up with Kripke.

Anyway, let’s round this rant off at three flawed arguments with this one: people are “free” (passive aggressive) to interpret the episode how they “like,” but Sam and Dean bring soulmates is not actually supported by the episode.

Ugh!

Why the hell would the writers have Ash even mention soulmates in the scene at all, if it wasn’t to tell the audience (and the boys) something important about the characters? Knowing that soulmates share a heaven isn’t necessary to the plot at this moment (if they aren’t soulmates). We have been told people have individual heavens in most cases, so we don’t need to know the soulmate exception to generally understand how heaven works. But we do get this bit of exposition because 1) it tells us why Dean was able to find Sam on his own (with no spells, even though people don’t usually share a space), and 2) because it tells us the info that they are soulmates, bound together no matter what. It deepens their whole tangled up relationship, for better or worse. Is it a bit unusual for brothers to be soulmates? Yes! That’s the whole point. Sam and Dean are weird. This is not news. Where have these people been for the last 4.5 seasons??

Also, Ash looks directly at Sam and Dean after he drops the soulmate bomb. And each of them looks uncomfortable. The scene takes a beat here, a short one but it’s clear, so the audience can acknowledge this info. Why would the camera focus on the characters’ reactions if the soulmates line was a just a random little nugget of info? People hellers will write whole distractions on the significance of “parallels” between characters and “interpret” scenes using head-canons as support, but they can’t don’t want to understand that the camera lingering on the brothers when they learn information about themselves is significant? Also, it suggests in the script that Ash looks away from them to give them a minute to process this info. Why would he care if it didn’t pertain to them? (Hellers. Have. No. Media. Literacy.). Sam and Dean are soulmates. It’s canon.

Also, this is another episode but it adds confirmation. In 15x20, Dean feels Sam on the bridge in the new heaven before he sees or hears him. Thus. Soulmates!

[eideticmemory]

blurb about kinky spencer what do you feel about that like early seasons to late seasons what his into it ☝🏻💥

ik everyone has their ideas about spencer reid’s sexuality between ages ~18-24 and cm rly never says much about it BUT i’ve always imagined that during college/grad school and the early seasons spencer was actually very sexually confident. i don’t mean that as in he could see someone across the room and cruise them and take them home but i think he knew what he liked. he is beautiful, that’s obvious so i imagine that when he got onto a college campus and started getting validation from all these pretty girls and pretty guys that he was like “wait…..i actually kinda have sex appeal?” and that was good bc even tho he was super insecure and younger than his classmates he was still as horny as everyone else!!! im a bi spencer truther and i think his first sexual experience was with a man and i think he felt anxious about sex with women for a while. his first time she probably had to throw herself at him but his brain was just like ???? ok??? i think shes having a good time?? but?? she cant get a boner so i cant quite tell?? this is getting long i’m sorry 😭

but i think anatomy helped him a lot. it was something he could contextualize and i can see him looking up vagina diagrams or even watching porn to figure out What To Do. and as he becomes more sexually active he becomes very good at reading body language. fucking someone and thinking “ok their legs are shaking, thats good, thats a good sign. oh they’re breathing’s faster, better keep this up” but what he liked the most was just being spoken to. he liked verbal validation during sex very much, someone who would grab his hands and put them where they wanted bc he could figure out the rest from there. once he gets out of his head a little bit is when he starts becoming vocal himself. i imagine he got a lot of questions during sex like “ru ok? ru enjoying it?” bc he would just lay there and whimper quietly bc he was overthinking everything. then one time its so good that he forgets to think and he’s moaning like a whore and it finally clicks for him “oh wow it feels even better to just let it out. oh wow they like it when i let it out” i think his kink was just pleasing someone, being good and feeling good, being able to tell himself that he did good.

in the early seasons i think he enjoyed sex and the idea of being that close to someone. i think he was touch starved and craved intimacy and he seeks it less as the show goes on. his experiences at the bau (especially the anthrax case) encouraged his germaphobia and yeah he would still get horny but he struggled to find anyone whose touch didn’t gross him out. i think that was a struggle for him for a long time. then especially after maeve he was constantly chasing the touch of a woman he had never even seen or gotten to hug. it was weird to think about while grieving her but his mind and heart craved her so much through their relationship so his body did too. he thought one day he would let someone touch him. someone he loved! and then she died in front of him so that was shot to shit. he grieved sex he would never have. i would describe his kink here as “someone i love so much i’d die for it. they could have anthrax on their tongue and i’d kiss them just because its them.”

in the later seasons after cat adams and the prison arc, i think he loses a lot of his inhibitions. basically a revelation of “i don’t have the energy to ponder on what i like and who i like” bc he feels it instantly. the moment he makes eye contact with someone, he can feel it in his tummy that he would have sex with them if they wanted. and when he feels it he flirts with humor. there’s nothing he loves more than when he banters with someone cute, making them laugh and catching a sparkle in their eye. like if they can understand each other’s minds then surely they might understand each other’s bodies. in bed he’s superrr vocal but not necessarily dirty more like “do u wanna be on top? yes i want that to” “can i take your shirt off? thank you” and putting a titty in his mouth. “can i bend your legs back a little more? i just wanna get a little deeper. tell me if its uncomfortable though” a lot of “yeah yeah yeah” when he’s drowning in it and then looking down and saying “yeah? yeah? yeah?” bc at the end of the day he stills needs to know he’s doing good

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Is it just me or has the card illustrations (specifically the groovy) been kinda bad lately? Like don't get me wrong most of the pre groovy are absolute bangers, but the groovies? Not so much. But lately there has been an obvious decrease in quality with anatomy, and even 😐 a whitewashing problem.

Take Lilia's dorm groovy for example— the piece is gorgeous, but whenever I zoom into his face the way they draw his face looks so off.

As for the whitewashing issue, I've noticed that Leona's beastly garb groovy had him very ashy looking (but some may argue that it's just the lighting casted on him)

Right now though the one that's been bothering me the most is the obvious whitwashing on Kalim's tsum groovy. We really can't argue that it's a lighting issue there, cause Jamil's firework card had a similar setting and he didn't look that light.

Personally, I think TWST’s Groovy illustrations have always been hit or miss since the beginning. I have similar issues with the faces in Lilia and Leona’s Dorm Uniform Groovies, and the anatomy seemed slightly off in a few others. I can’t find the original post anymore (I think OP didn’t tag it??), but I clearly recall an artist having spoken about how the pose in Epel’s initial Dorm Uniform art looked weird; they included drawings of how Epel’s spine and limbs looked vs how they should look to illustrate what they meant. Those are just a few examples of then and now though, and we have to keep in mind that if we include ALL available cards then the funky faces and weird posing/proportions only make up a very small percentage of what’s out there.

The more important issue at the moment is the coloring choices that were made for a few recent SSR event Groovies: Beastly Garb Leona and Tsumsted Kalim. They are pictured below with a few other card illustrations I pulled that have similar lighting (or as similar as I could find). You’ll notice (especially for Tsumsted Kalim’s Groovy) that the characters’ skin colors are much lighter than they should be.

Now I’ll be honest here 💦 I actually can’t tell (even when eyedropping the colors to compare; I don't even know if eyedropping is an accurate way to compare colors since the lighting and environment in every illustration is never EXACTLY the same) if Leona’s Beastly Garb Groovy is just the strong sunlight or if it has been whitewashed. I don’t have enough knowledge and/or experience with color theory and in real life to know for certain. However, as the Anon has said, that same argument cannot be made for the Scarabia duo. It’s particularly bad for Tsumsted Kalim because Yasmina Silk Jamil also had fireworks in the background, and his skin color is fine there. Sometimes artists purposefully use an altered color palate to achieve a different feeling in their pieces (for example, pastel colors for a soft, soothing look). I don’t think that was the case for Tsumsted Kalim because everything else in the Groovy art looks pretty true to color for the lighting (but again, I'm not an expert in coloring so I could be wrong). When taken in conjunction with Leona’s Beastly Garb… it could indicate a troubling pattern.

There’s been a lot of speculation going around for why this has happened, chief among that speculation being the TWST team has likely hired new staff and/or colorists (and Japan, being Japan, is pretty homogenous; it may be difficult to find artists with an understanding of how to color and shade darker skin tones). Again, these are just guesses circulating in the fandom. Nothing is confirmed, and nor does this excuse what has happened.

This has, very understandably, caused a lot of hurt and upset in the TWST fandom and community. So now the question is…

What can we do about it?

You can communicate your feelings to the TWST team! They have a form to collect thoughts and opinions from the playerbase, which can be accessed here.

PLEASE NOTE:

Be polite and professional. Nothing good comes out of anger, especially if the anger is directed at others; if you are rude and/or curse at the staff, they will be much less likely to hear you out.

Communicate in Japanese. The staff you are sending your complaint to are Japanese, and the game itself is Japanese (Beastly Garb Leona and Tsumsted Kalim are not yet out in the EN server, which is staffed by totally different people).

If you don’t know how to write in Japanese, this Twitter user has created polite templates to communicate our concerns with the whitewashing. (Their whole thread is great; please reference it if you need additional assistance!!) I would not recommend adding extra text, especially if you would be relying on a translation program to do so. Speaking in broken Japanese can be perceived as rude and will only detract from your message.

A similar situation to this occurred during the initial run of Fairy Gala; TWST had used “exotic” in its text, and after receiving an influx of feedback from the players, the devs went in and changed the dialogue to no longer use the term. It’s possible to make the change we want to see a reality if we respectfully make our thoughts known.

[graveyardmold]

leto joker smut idea:

reader is bruce’s ex wife 🤷🏻🤨

preferably post credit scene tjlsc joker

tyyyyy

SRY I WASN’T ABLE TO WRITE IT AS SOON AS YOU SENT THE REQUEST. WROTE THIS TODAY IN LIKE 2HRS BC I SAID “Bro if i don’t do it now then i won’t do it anymore” SO I GATHERED MY STRENGTH AND DID IT! I HOPE YOU’LL LIKE IT😭❤️

(also I didn’t proof-read, sry again🙏🏻)

Warnings: SMUT, PiV, consensual, slight choking kink??, mentions of female anatomy, Y/N one shot, Joker and his godly cock, squirting, mentions of pee, protected sex, mentions of whores, failed marriage (if y’all wanna classify it as a warning, idm).

MINORS DNI!☺️

(and if you do, I’ll find where you live)

“I’m done with you Bruce! You never have time for me, all you care about is your hero-self and Robin!”

I say as I make my way to the Villa’s door shouting at my husband, well… now ex husband, who’s following me.

“Where are you going? Come back and we’ll talk about it.”

Bruce’s now behind me, talking quietly, and I can’t stand it anymore. How can he be so calm?!

“No! You always tell me to talk about it, you ask for my forgiveness and all you do is repeat your mistakes!! Every. single. time.”

I open the door and reach the driveway. I hear him saying something as I peek over my shoulder just to find him at the door. Yeah you’ll never run after me…

“Bye Bruce.”

I say as I make my way down the street.

“Yeah I should’ve left tomorrow morning. It’s not ideal being a woman and walking alone in the middle of the night”

I say, talking to myself, approaching a Café.

I enter and the barista greets me with a smile.

“Hello ma’am! What would you like to get?”

I stare at the food list and finally find something that I might like.

“I’ll take the raspberry hot tea and a chocolate chips waffle. Thank you”

I reply with a smile. She types my order on the register and tells me the price.

I take a sit and as I’m waiting for my food, a weird guy enters the café and sits in front of me.

I take a quick look at him and I notice that he’s staring at me. I freeze not knowing how to react and the barista comes with my food.

“Uhm..actually could I please get a bag and a cup so i can take these with me. I don’t want to eat them here no more. I’m sorry..”

The girl looks at me and then at the guy and nods her head.

“Yeah of course, give me a sec!”

She comes back with a paper bag and a cardboard cup with my tea in it. I put everything in the bag, say goodbye to the girl and leave.

As I’m passing by the Café I see the same guy leaving and I start to panic again, walking faster.

I enter a dark road and I feel like he’s approaching.

I can’t hear or see anything, I’m trying to breathe silently so I can hear if there’s danger around me.

*driiiiiiiin*

I jump at the sound of my phone ringing.

“THE FUCK”

It’s Bruce. I hung up.

“A girl all alone at night? Did you run away or something?”

I freeze… I know that voice.

“Aren’t you going to answer? Or maybe turn around? You know…this isn’t really mindful of you. In front of The Joker himself also”

No I can’t face him. He knows i’m Bruce’s wife, he’ll kill me. Why the fuck did I leave that shit ass face tonight?!

“Listen, lady It’s better if you do it yourself. I’m don’t want to be forced to touch you”

I take a deep breath and turn around, facing my ex husband’s worst enemy.

He looks at me with surprise, his eyes lit up with excitement; he’s probably thinking about all the bad things he’s going to do to me so I can tell him who Batman really is.

“Y/n! What an unexpected meeting! Shouldn’t you be with your husband?”

He asked inching closer. I take a step back.

“He’s no longer my husband

We hear rustling and we turn around to see what’s causing these sounds. The weirdo from the café comes out of the woods.

“Fucking bastard, that’s my whore! I wanted her for the night, go get another one!”

He said and he launched towards me, like a tiger with its prey. I jumped back and fell to the ground, scraping my knees and thighs. Joker was quick to stop the guy before he reached me and I saw Frost coming up from behind the corner with a gun aimed to the guy.

Frost waited for a nod from Joker and then dragged the guy to an isolated part of the street and shot him. I was paralyzed with fear and I wasn’t able to comprehend what had happened since I left the Villa.

Joker helped me up and slipped an arm behind my back to keep my balanced. Then he took out his phone and called his driver, telling him to come pick us up.

After a couple of minutes he arrived and now we’re sat in Joker’s limousine. I try to stay as far from Joker as possible, I don’t know what he’s about to do and if I need to jump out of the car I better do it fast.

[…]

We arrive at his gigantic Villa, not even Bruce’s is as big as this one. Damn.

Joker accompanies me inside and leads me to the bathroom.

“You can take a shower and relax. Your bedroom’s attached on the left side.”

He says and I lock myself inside, taking in the massive look of this bathroom. A shower that could accommodate at least 2 people, marble sink with a HUGE mirror, lights everywhere, even the toilet was made out of marble.

I undressed myself and entered the shower, turning on the hot water and letting my body relax with the soft smell of vanilla of the soap.

About 20 minutes later I get out of the shower and get two towels. I wrap the first one around my body and I use the second one to dry my hair just enough so the water doesn’t drip on the floor.

I realize I don’t have any clothes so I come out the bathroom and go to the attached bedroom on the right side.

I make my way to the wardrobe and let the towel that was covering my naked body fall to the ground. I open the wardrobe’s door and see The Joker’s reflection from the mirror. He’s sitting in my fucking bed.

“WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK ARE YOU DOING IN MY ROOM??”

I scream picking up the towel and trying to cover my body with it.

He stands up and comes closer to my.

“No beautiful, I told you it was the room on the left side. This is my room, on the right side. You’re in my room”

He says and I realize that he’s right. Fuckk I messed up the rooms and now I’m standing, basically, naked in front of him.

“Aren’t you going to go to your room? Or do you want to stay here? I won’t complain if you decide to sleep here”

He says running a hand through my wet hair, putting it behind my ear and over my shoulder.

His touch is like ice on my now hot flesh. I feel like I’m going to combust at any moment as I stare into his eyes, trying to comprehend my thoughts.

My brain tells me to run as far as I can from this psychopath but my body wants to root itself in this bedroom. I involuntarily take a step forward and he picks me up and settles me on the bed.

The towel gets caught on his foot and it slips away from my body, leaving me naked in front of him.

He doesn’t jump on me, doesn’t look me like he wants to do something bad and doesn’t even touch me. He just waits there, looking in my eyes, keeping himself up with his fists on the mattress on each side of my face.

My hand comes up to caress his cheek and i move it behind his head, using it to drag him down so our lips can meet.

He kisses me tenderly, placing both of his hands on my cheeks, embracing my face. He’s sweet almost like he’s afraid of breaking me.

I feel myself growing hotter and hotter and I deepen the kiss, he gets the signal and moves a hand down to my breasts. He engulfs my breast with his hand and uses his thumb to massage my nipple.

I whine and I can feel him smiling on my lips, his other hand wrapping around my neck before watching me to see if it was ok. I nod and he squeezes my neck, making me whine again in anticipation.

I try to reach his pants with my hands and when I reach them I unbuckle his belt, letting his pants fall down to the floor.

He takes off his boxers and…DAMN HE’S BIG AND- ..green??

I watch him pump his cock a couple of times before searching behind himself on the nightstand for something. He picks up a condom, opens it and puts it on (USE PROTECTIONS GUYS).

He aligns himself with my cunt and starts to enter me. I already had sex with Bruce but Joker is a bit longer and thicker so I feel my pussy being stretched out.

He looks for any songs of discomfort but there aren’t any so he starts to pump in and out, increasing the speed once he hears my loud moans.

“FUCKKK, HARDER PLEASE” I scream-moan, already feeling like I’m in the clouds.

He starts to fuck me deeper and rougher. Almost pulling out just to slam inside me at full force, repeatedly.

“FUCK FUCK FUCK DON’T STOP!!”

I cry out of pleasure, taking his hand that’s on my breast and placing it on my cunt. He understands and rubs circles on my clit with his thumb.

I feel my eyes going inside out from the sensation of everything all together.

He squeezed my neck more and uses it to stabilize my body while he pounds into me.

“Fuck you feel so good. I might as well keep you with me, who needs to kill Bruce when you can have his pretty ex wife?”

He breathes heavily and I know he’s close, so I reach his balls and massage them with my hand.

“Damn princess, you make me feel like I’m in heaven”

He groans and I feel his cock starting to twitch inside me.

“I’m close, fuck!”

He said and I whine, asking him to go faster. Feeling like I’m about to pass out.

“I need to pee!”

I shout, eyes going wide at the sensation.

He presses his hand on my bladder and I cry of pleasure, moaning.

“I’m about to com-“

I can’t even finish the sentence that I feel a pee-like juice coming out of me at full force.

“Fuck princess you squirted! Look how much came out! Fuuuck”

He says still fucking into me.

A couple of thrusts later he cums inside the condom with a loud groan. Pumping himself dry inside me until his cock was semi-hard.

He pulls out and throws the condom on the nightstand, then he picks me up and settles us under the sheets. Hugging me, embracing my body with his.

He kisses me on the lips and starts to rub my head, combing my hair with his fingers. I quickly fall asleep on his chest while he kisses my forehead.

Fuck Bruce, I should’ve chosen Joker from the start. But luckily it’s never too late.

[aldryrththerainbowheart]

You get what you give

Note: We're leaving dmc3 era folks. I should probably state this at the beginning but the reader is a bit ooc. You have creative background, you're welcome. Dante and reader learn more about each other as they try to work as a team.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“So…these are your accounts.” You spoke more to yourself than Dante as you turned page after page filled with various scribblings, none of which even closely resembled accounts. You spotted one with tic-tac-toe, on the other Dante just tried how many circles he can fit on one page, and on another two were very fifth-grader drawings of male and female anatomy.

“Yeah.” you heard from the opposite side of the office.

Jesus.

“There seems to be a gap here.”

“Is there?”

“Yeah. There’s a gap where should be accounts. I can see a big account-free gap between page one and page two hundred and ten.”

Dante fished a magazine out of the cushions of the worn couch and headed toward the toilet. To your horror, you heard the sound of the zipper opening, and when you lifted your head, your sight was greeted with a piece of pale buttcheek hanging out of oversized cargo pants. When you heard the sound of water running, you burrowed your face in your hands.

“Could you close the door next time?!”

“Don’t have ‘em.”

“What??”

“Don’t have the door,” Dante answered calmly, holding a magazine in one hand as he went about his business.

You decided to change the topic and occupy your mind so you won’t freak out about Dante's complete lack of decorum.

“This place is a mess! Not just its finances the building looks like it's about to crumble, I can’t barely walk for all the debris and pizza boxes littering the floor, and electricity falls out every two hours!”

You throw Dante an exasperated glare as he stepped from the bathroom, this time with his pants up.

“It’s not my fault that a bunch of…gangsters decided to wreck my shop, and if you didn’t notice the electricity gets jammed all around the city, thanks to the massive tower that spurted from the ground a week ago.”

“Please tell me you have insurance on this place.”

“I just moved here.”

“Argh! Where’s a phone?”

Dante walked over to a pile of debris, put his hand in there, and pulled out the dusty red rotary phone. To his credit, he wiped off some of the dust before handing it to you.

“All right, so thankfully, I have written some important numbers in my diary, including the insurance company. They should at least give us some advice on how to handle this.

“And the desk?”

Dante nodded his head to one piece of what used to be a wooden office desk cleaved right in the middle. Right.

You sighed. Sitting on the floor did not seem like the best idea, lest you wanted to throw away your pants as soon as you came home. So you just stood there, balancing the rotary on your hand while holding the earpiece with your shoulder to your ear. You handed Dante your diary opened at the contact list, so he is of some use. As you started putting in the numbers, the phone started ringing.

“Yes? Hello? Mr. Sparda’s office.” you used honorifics despite Dante telling you otherwise. Old habits die hard.

“Help! They swarming the entire area! The dem-” You didn’t get the chance of listening to the rest of the story as Dante ripped the headphone out of your hand.

He listened to them for a minute before giving you back the phone with the person still talking on the other line.

“Ah! Yes…Mr. Sparda will arrive soon. Goodbye.” You finished talking to them while you watched Dante stomping around the office, gathering his gear.

“Take care of the place will ya? And if you hear weird sounds from outside, don’t worry it’s normal here.”

As he headed towards the door, you called after him. “Hey! You still have to give me-” The click of the door closing was your only answer. “The employment contract, and CIN, and testimony about the accident in the shop…” you finished the sentence to yourself.

You stood there in the middle of decimated building, surrounded by garbage and unpaid bills, and reminders from the tax office. Wordlessly, you walked to your bag, pulled out two pills of aspirin, and swallowed them in one go. This’ll be a long day.

-

By the time Dante returned, you managed to get the office area into a somewhat manageable space. The trash you collected was enough to fill three large bags and you had a feeling that if you properly decluttered the entire building, you would fill thrice as much. With the desk missing, you created a small working area in a place where the desk should be and answered endless calls that gave you an idea of what sort of business is Dante running, or not.

You moved to Redgrave recently for your now ex-job. You had marveled at how cheap the housing expenses were here, despite Redgrave being one of the larger cities. Soon you found out why. Living here is…dangerous. Frequent disappearances, lots of crime, and natural disasters. Well, natural, recently Redgrave city experienced an earthquake, which caused some ancient monuments to rise from underground. The newspaper explained this phenomenon as an earthquake revealing old ruins hidden under the city. You didn’t question it. Neither did you question Morrison when he told you Dante Sparda does mostly pest removal. You assumed that the guy is an exterminator, and he is…in a way. The issue is in what exactly he is exterminating.

As you answered calls and booked him appointments, you learned that there is a side to the world that was unknown to you. There’s a group of what appeared to be grim reapers with massive scissors at 99 Greenview Lane. Then some gentleman was hiding in his car from two multi-limbed living statues between Rock St. and Lancaster Aven. And the last call you picked up was just screaming and inhuman hissing… Needless to say, you were more than a little worried, and you had to make an order in all of it. So when the door swung open you jumped up in shock and almost peed yourself at the sight of blood-covered Dante, hunching over like a predator ready to pounce and with his bangs covering his face in a way it made his eyes almost glow from underneath them. As he began walking, no, stalking in your direction you felt the same chill as the night you met.

“G-good evening mister-”

He shot you a look.

“Dante.”

You slowly rose from your seating position as if any quick movements would make him act up.

“The accounts are done. It took me twice as long because I’ve been answering calls between the accounts. You’re booked for two weeks.” You gave a nervous chuckle.

“Somethings different.”

“Huh?” you looked around in confusion. “Oh, I guess I cleaned the place a little.”

“You cleaned??” Dante’s eyes peered at you from the white curtain.

“Well, I have to make a working space. You gestured awkwardly to the calendar, notebook, lamp, phone, and few writing supplies in an empty can you found, all neatly lined up in rectangular shapes.

Dante put his sword against the wall and walked to you while fishing for something in his pocket. He pulled out a thick wad of banknotes, quickly thumbed through them, and gave you some.

“Thanks for today. You did a lot of work today. See you tomorrow.”

When you said your goodbyes, you were already pushed out of the shop. Only when the door closed behind you, you inspected your paycheck and almost choked. Now you are sure Dante has no idea how money works, considering the children’s coloring book he made out of his accounts and that he gave you during your first day what you normally earned in a month.

-

The next day you came a little late. It doesn’t matter, because, from the silence that greeted you, no one else was up and about in this establishment. You looked around the ground floor with Dante nowhere to be found, so you headed upstairs. You were a little uncomfortable entering his private space, but he had several appointments in the morning and you need to keep this business going if you wanted your next paycheck.

You opened several rooms, finding a small kitchen, storage, a room filled with…things, and a bathroom. As you were going through rooms, you realized something. The place was jarringly, surprisingly, miserably bare. Not personal in the slightest. The only sign that someone live there was empty pizza boxes and beer bottles, and dirty laundry. No photos, or posters on the wall. Dante said he moved to this place month ago. Surely he has to have boxes of stuff. Clothes, dishes, something…

You opened the last door and there he was, sprawled on the bed in deep slumber. A blanket wrapped around his hips and muscular torso was full on display.

“Dante! It’s time to wake up.” You put your hands on the edge of the bed. No reaction.

With a huff, you walked over to the curtain and pulled them open, then headed to the foot of the bed and gripped the blanket.

“I said, wake up Dante!” you raised your voice and pulled away the blanket. Only to screech in horror. Is this guy allergic to clothes?!

At your harpy screech, Dante finally woke up.

“Huh? What’s the time?”

“It’s almost eight!”

“In the evening?”

“No moron! it’s morning.” You gestured towards the window. Dante blinked once, twice, then flopped on the bed. “Too early.”

You felt your eyebrow twitch. You just called your boss a moron and you were in danger of kicking him in the butt he flashed your way. Without another word, you walked out of the room. Dante secretly grinned in victory and felt himself dozing back to sleep…only to have water poured on him a few minutes later.

“Hey-What the-”

“Good morning mister Sparda!” you singsonged, face dangerously close to his, smiling aggressively. “I hope you slept well, and now it’s time to wake up.” You gave two claps right in his face and Dante jerked away in shock. As you walked out of Dante’s bedroom, you could hear his silent grumbling, but also rustling of the sheets as he got up. Good.

When Dante walked down to the office dressed (?) and somewhat clean you handed him a piece of paper.

“What’s that?”

“Your appointments. I wrote the time and the address and number of…pests. However, I can’t tell you which kind it was. The customers were often…disoriented. You’re already running late for the first one, by the way.” You stated as you peered at the digital clock at your…table?

You noticed that only now. The improvised sitting area is made out of concrete blocks, planks of wood, and a car seat he found god knows where. It was a poor excuse for office space, but it’s more than what you left yesterday. You turned back to Dante who was still studying your writings and started to gently push him towards the door.

“I’m sure they’ll forgive a little tardiness. After all, they need you.”

“Right, I swing by once I buy some breakfast and…”

“No breakfast. You’re late, remember?”

“But I’m hungry!”

“You should’ve thought about that before sleeping in.” you sing-songed once more and pushed him out of the door.

“Happy hunting!” you called after him before closing the door in his face.

-

With the accounts taken care of, you mostly picked up phones and cleaned the office…again. That seemed to be like a neverending task. With Dante having no cleaning supplies, not even a bucket or a broom, you have to bring these things from home. You filled another pack of trash bags and the place didn’t look so sad anymore.

As you were sweeping around the couch, something crinkled under your shoe. You looked down and noticed you stepped onto a picture frame. As you bend down to pick it up, you noticed the glass front broke and several pieces fell on the floor. Once you carefully removed all glass and threw away the broken frame, you had a chance to inspect the photo. A woman, probably in her thirties, with long, platinum blonde hair and a smile that seemed to hold many secrets. She was wearing a red shawl and when you inspected her face closely, a yellow paling paper gave away two pale blue eyes.

This must be Dante's mother, you were sure of it. What happened to her? Surely, she would call into the office and check up on him by now. Are they not in contact? Why would he have her photo on his desk though? And what about the rest of his family? Does Dante have any family? The more pieces of a puzzle you had about the life of Dante Sparda, the more questions you had. You could have just put the photo away and mind your own business. However, you couldn’t look away from the shining red dot on the otherwise grey canvas that was your life. It was the reason why you’re still working here, after all. That and fat bills still resting in your wallet.

You were ripped out of your musings by the loud growling of your stomach. It’s been two hours after your lunchtime. When you prepared for leaving, you realized that you don't have the keys to the shop or any way to contact Dante. You have to get him a pager or something. Hopefully a sign on the front door with the message ‘Be right back’ will suffice.

-

When you came back, you found Dante laying on the couch with a magazine covering his face. Silently to not wake him up, you tiptoed to your improvised desk. Your efforts to be quiet showed pointless when Dante greeted you from under the magazine.

“The insurance lady called.”

You jumped a little in surprise, “Really? What did she say?”

“The government is sending funds to small businesses to help them after the earthquake.”

“That’s great!” you beamed. Finally, something is working out.

“Dante?”

“Hm?”

“You are enlisted in the tradesman…right?”

Your only answer was a low grumble.

“Dante?!” You felt your blood pressure rising.

“Listen,” Dante grabbed the magazine and threw it on the couch as he got up, “it’s your job to take care of these things! You’re the accountant!”

“I’m secretary!” you interrupted him, “my job is to pick up phones not be your maid. I’m doing everything in here, and I don’t even have a contract. Working in a place that’s on the verge of bankruptcy for a man who doesn’t even know what CIN is??”

“And you think I spend all these hours outside of the office scavenge hunting?! And for your information, I know very well who the CIA is, worked rather closely with them in the past.”

“What?!?”

“Is this a bad time?”

You both whipped your heads towards the entrance and notice Lady standing there.

“Great. You were the only thing missing here.” Dante snarled sarcastically.

“Don’t drag me into your shit.” she hissed angrily.

You still weren’t done with Dante. “I worked here tirelessly for three days now. Doing everything from chores to administrative work, to finance. Despite the working conditions” you threw your arm around the office to emphasize your point, “I was rather amicable-”

“You were a pain in the ass,” he snapped at you. “I was doing fine before you came. I don’t need you. I don’t need anybody.�� He whispered the last bit, but you heard all the same.

You were completely speechless, only letting out a single gasp. Your patience finally snapped. Without another word, you grabbed your things and walked out of the office, but then you remembered something and put your head inside the office once more.

“I bought you lunch, by the way.” Then you left for good.

Dante and Lady simultaneously turned to the steaming, plastic container on the table.

-

Your nails nervously danced on the plastic table in what was probably the only standing McDonald’s in the city. You were supposed to wait for the head of the staff and discuss the contract details. As you watched a middle-aged man with a beer belly stuff his face with Bic Mac while his two gremlins (ahem children) smeared ketchup on the surrounding tables as one of the staff, a high school girl with blue hair in braids ran after them with a wet cloth and distressed look on her face.

You can’t wait for the shift to start.

You were so preoccupied with watching the scene in front of you that you haven’t noticed someone quietly slipping into the opposite seat.

“You need to go back.”

“Gah!” you jumped at the familiar voice in front of you.

“Seriously?! Do you and Dante enjoy freaking me out?” You saw Lady’s deadpan expression and realized how loud you were. Without commenting on it, she continued.

“You need to return to the Devil May Cry. Dante needs you.”

“Devil-what??”

“Devil May Cry. That’s how Dante wants to name the shop after he scrapes enough money to repair it, that is.”

“Well, good luck with that.”

Lady narrowed her eyes at you, then sighed.

“Listen, I understand that you’re angry and that the job is…difficult at times. But there’s plenty of cash in demon hunting. Especially now with the Temen-”

“Hold on, did you say demon hunting??”

“Well yeah. What else did you think Dante was doing?”

“Pest…control?”

Lady cackled. “That he does. Just different types of ‘pests’.”

You let that information sink in.

“So…you and Dante…hunt demons.”

Lady nodded, “And the bastard is pretty good at it, too. The best there is.” She admitted begrudgingly. “But the things like taxes and running a business? He’s hopeless. I don’t think he had anyone to show him the ropes.”

“In enterprise?”

“In…life.”

You remembered the bareness of Dante’s apartment, the single photo of a woman with the same eyes as Dante’s, the haunted look in Dante’s eyes the night you first met him, and the rumors.

“Lady…what kind of guy is Dante.”

She seemed to be taken aback by that question, but then she looked at the table with a frown. The events from a month ago came back to the forefront of her mind. The tower. The blood. The ritual. The man in red. She swallowed a lump in her throat.

“He’s…a guy who saved my life, for the start.” It wasn’t in her nature to depend on anyone and she hated owning someone, but Lady was not petty enough to deny this fact. She told you about the events of the Temen-Mi-Gru incident. At least the ones she was sure of, and left out gory details, leaving only relevant and important.

Just when she was describing them crawling out of a decaying tower, another voice chimed in.

“Excuse me, ma’am, I’m interviewing this person.” It was a storm managed, and she was giving Lady disapproving glare. Bold from someone who let you sit there for half an hour.

Lady clicked her tongue and answered, “Right, it’ll be just a minute.”

The manager put their hands on their hips, “But I have time now.”

Without looking at them, Lady pulled out a gun, and with its barrel pointing right in their face she growled, “And you’ll have it five minutes later.”

You’ve never seen a person disappearing that quickly before.

Lady spoke again.

“The thing is, he may appear like a cocky jerk at first, but once you get to know him as I did, well, he’s still a cocky jerk.” Lady chuckled. “Who puts his skin at the front line for people he barely knows and heads straight into places other people are running from, guns blazing.” She paused for a moment, twiddling with her gun. “So please, help him.”

You remembered how tired Dante looked every time he stepped into the shop, exhausted, bitter, and covered in grime. The surprise and gratefulness he displayed by simply you cleaning his office.

You let out a sigh. I’m too soft.

-

There was a bit of awkward air in the Devil May Cry office that day. Perhaps it was because there was an ex-employer who declared their departure with a slamming of a door and an ex-boss who kept looking at the floor with hands deeply wedged into his pockets, with an impatient angry woman with a rocket launcher on her back tapping her foot standing in between.

Lady jabbed Dante in the shoulder, trying to snap him out of it.

“C’mon!” she hissed through her gritted teeth. “Say it already!!”

With eyes still trained on the floor, Dante shuffled closer to you. He had the decency to lift his head for a split second to grumble with a visible pout.

“Do you wanna work at my shop.”

You bite your lip.

“Alright.”

His head whipped towards Lady, “See! I said it.”

“Don’t push it.” she pointed her finger at him threateningly. Then, she turned to you with something you dared to call a sweet smile and said, “I hope you’ll make the best of it!”

She strutted off after that, leaving you both in silence once more.

You took a good look at Dante. He looked more…ruffled than usual, and you could’ve guessed why, based on his reluctance and Lady’s pestering.

“Thanks for the lunch.” Dante ripped you away from your train of thought, making you jump a little. That made him frown.

“And you don’t have to be so skittish around me either. I…” he sighed, scratching the back of his neck. “I know I can be a little…too much to handle, but I don’t want you to be scared to tell me off if you feel like it. She does it all the time.” He motioned towards the now-closed door with a snark.

You looked into his eyes. He was truly looking at you for once and you couldn’t help but get a little lost in those baby blues.

“I don’t like that you’re afraid of me,” Dante said softly.

Your first instinct was to deny what he said, but you paused and went about your feelings regarding Dante Sparda.

“I’m not afraid. I’m…confused.” You shrugged.

“Confused?” Dante raised his eyebrows.

“You’re…strange.” You motioned with your hands awkwardly, looking for proper words.

Dante seemed to think about that comment and you were worried that you may offend him.

“Whaddya wanna know?”

-

“So, her name is Eva.” You spoke mostly to yourself, as you held the picture of who was - surprise, surprise - Dante’s mother.

“Was Eva.”

You lifted your head from the photo to him. Dante was sitting at the new desk, cleaning his guns. After that simple question, you and Dante talked away as he helped you get the office together. You talked about your lives and your families, you told him about how you attended art school, but then had to drop out due to not being able to pay the tuition and started working as an account, which you hated, as you described to him in vivid detail. Dante, told you bits and pieces from his past, albeit you could see that he was still uncomfortable with disclosing some details. By the time you were done, you sat Dante down and with his help made a few phone calls. You managed to wrangle some money out of the insurance company, and order repair work on the front facade, and Dante even agreed on buying new furniture and office gear together. By the time you were done with him, the poor boy was so wrangled out and out of his depth that you took pity on him and ordered a pizza. While you waited for the pizza to arrive, you gently probed him about the smiling woman in the picture.

“Has she…?” you left the sentence open.

Dante shifted in his chair, not once lifting his gaze from the firearm.

“It happened when I was a little kid. There was a fire..”

“I’m sorry.” And you were. You can’t imagine what would you do if you lost your dad. Sure, you didn’t have mom but as far as you can remember, she was never in the picture. Can’t miss something you never had. But Dad…he was your whole world, and every day you hoped he still has enough time. That once rehabilitation was over, he’ll be back on his feet again.

“It’s ok,” Dante said quietly. It seems he wasn’t comfortable talking about her.

Once more, silence settle over the office, and you desperately looked for things to say. You got up from the couch and walked over to him. Dante peered at you from behind his bangs.

“I doubt you can see anything with your hair like that.” You put the photo on his desk again and pulled out a hair band. Dante twitched a little when he felt your fingers carefully card through his hair. When you were done, a little tuft of white hair stuck out right above his forehead. He looked a little ridiculous.

“There, now you can see what you’re doing.” you smiled.

He looked up at you from his chair, a little taken aback and unsure what to say, he looked so sweet and boyish it made your heart twitch. You felt yourself being pulled into those blue shades once more. You noticed those whispy white lashes framing them and the petulant scrunch of his brow.

“You have really pretty eyes.” You have breathed out, feeling a little flustered by saying the compliment.

Year heard Dante swallow. Is his face getting closer, and yours warmer??

You were interrupted by knocking on the door.

“That’d be the pizza.” Dante finally spoke. “I…uh…I get it.”

You watched dumbly as he grabbed bills wedged in the demon's skull that served as a morbid decoration of sorts and headed to the door.

You completely forget to ask him about the whole demon-hunting thingy.

[its-a-me-mango]

ART/OC’S Q&A

Do you take requests?

No, but I do take suggestions! The main difference is that I can pick and choose between suggestions for ideas that I like and want to draw from, you're welcome to send in suggestions whenever! Obviously don't take it personally if I never draw your suggestion, they are just drawing ideas to me and I would go insane if I drew EVERY single suggestion I get!

Can you draw my OC/AU?

As much as I love everyone's OC’s and AU’s, I cannot draw for everyone, and to be honest I am a lot less likely to draw someone's OC/AU if I’m requested. Don’t take it personally, I have a weird thing where I would much rather gift someone art rather than be asked to draw it for them, it makes it feel like my idea and therefore I’m more passionate about doing it for them! It’s why I don’t request people directly to draw anything for me. Again everyone's ideas are amazing and I love seeing how creative people are. It's just that I'd much rather gift people art of their OC/AU than be requested to draw it, I will draw things for people when I have the motivation to do so!

Can I draw your characters/AU's/designs?

Yes! You are always welcome to draw any of my characters, AU's or designs! Please make sure to @ me in your own post if you do so I can see it and reblog it! I'd prefer to have any gifts for me be posted instead of sent to my ask box, as asks can sit in there for a while and I want others to see your amazing work ASAP, though I don't mind either way!

Can I write something with your character/AU’s/headcanons?

Yes!!! That would be so awesome!!! You are welcome to come to me to ask for advice on writing about my characters and stuff but yes you are welcome to write for them! I cannot write to save my life (dyslexia/ADHD mega combo lol) so I look up to anyone who can write fanfics and such, you guys are so cool!

Can I draw/write my sona/OC interacting with your characters?

Yes! I love character interactions so much so you are more than welcome to draw my characters interacting with yours, just nothing NSFW, hate speech or violent towards my characters or yours (angst doesn't count lol). Everything else is pretty much fair game, I love seeing my characters interacting with others it lets me learn about other people and their own amazing characters!

Shipping is fine but only if I know you! I don't mind shipping with Mango or Smug but not Telly (they're literally a baby so don't do that, weird as hell), again nothing NSFW though lol

Can I use your work for icons/banners/edits/etc.

Yes you can! No need to ask permission, I would appreciate credit being given to me, either to this blog or to my Twitter account, an @ to either account name is enough for me though a link is preferred. You are welcome to edit my work for icons/banners/edits as well, again as long as credit is given.

Can I repost your work?

Reposting is only allowed provided credit is given! Again, either to this blog or to my Twitter account, an @ to either account name is enough for me though a link is preferred. Do not repost my work claiming it as your own, that's weird. If i’ve drawn something for you you’re more than welcome to repost it with credit as well!

Can I copy/trace your work?

Do I really have to say this? No please don't do that, you don't learn from tracing other artists work, use real life references images if you need help learning anatomy. I don't consider style copying to be a thing so I'm fine with people incorporating my style into their own, and sketching over my work to get a rough sketch is fine, just don't line over it and call it your own.

Can I used your work for AI?

No, fuck off.

Why do you tag some of your art as suggestive?

Just to be safe, I know I draw “sus” stuff sometimes and I mainly want to make sure people keep themselves safe when viewing my stuff. My blog will never explicitly post anything NSFW, the suggestive tag on my art is mainly for sex jokes, pinup style clothing/posing or ass. Again it is just to be safe, you’re not obliged to reblogs with the same tag as me, it’s just to make sure people don’t see something they don’t want to.

Who are the recurring characters that keep showing up here?

Oh, you mean my children? Let me give a rundown:

Mango (He/They) - Mango is my sona! I use him all the time for answering things and also just in general. He is part Dr Mario and part MLP pony from another dimension that somehow got sucked into the SMG4 universe. He works as a doctor in the SMG4 universe, he’s a bit cynical at times but he’s still a kind and caring guy, he’s just sick and tired of all the BS that happens in the SMG4 universe.

Smug (He/Him) - Smug was originally a weird bootleg SMG3 plushie that got turned into a human somehow, he is still a plushie just much bigger now. He spends all his time scamming people in various ways to get what he wants out of them and has no care or regard for them. He has a friend/partner who’s a bootleg SMG4 plush, however she wasn’t transformed as much as him and therefore is the same as before, she can just move and talk now.

Telly (They/Them) - Telly is a happy little accident that somehow occurred out of nowhere, they are the child of Mr Puzzles! They are a shy yet friendly little child who just wants to make friends and watch TV. They struggle with meeting people due to their speaker not working as they can only make static noises to communicate, but they are adventurous and always looking to have fun! They love and look up to their father a lot, he's their biggest inspiration.

If more get added I’ll put them here, you are always welcome to ask me about any of them! I love talking about them! All of them have their own tags on my blog that are free to be used by others as well!

Do you have any AU’s?

Yes! I have a werewolf SMG4 AU! I need to work on it. Werewolf SMG4 is a version of SMG4 who's been cursed to turn into an out of control werewolf every night, his friends are constantly working to try and find a solution to this curse while 4 is busy trying not to get anyone killed. It's very angsty and sad I promise, one day I will work on it more, you are welcome to ask about it whenever! It might motivate me to work on it more lol.