#platonic: sam

[flatstarcarcosa]

ough suddenly overcome w thoughts about sam and @dadbodsandbots and mason and the autism but i'm too tired to like. dump them.

[literaryavenger]

Steve, seeing Y/N babying Bucky: What happened??

Y/N, putting a bandaid on Bucky’s finger: Bucky got a paper cut.

Steve, rolling his eyes: Seriously? Yesterday Sam was screaming "I've been stabbed!" and all you did was yell "shut up!"

Y/N, after kissing Bucky’s boo-boo: That's because he was screaming "I think I've been stabbed!" Bitch, you're either stabbed or you aren't!

Steve:

Y/N:

Steve:

Natasha, sitting next to them while casually eating cereal: She's right.

[sofiaruelle]

Playing around with these marker brushes ft ASS gang.

[book-place-incorrect-quotes]

Y/N: Can I have more some candy, De?

Dean: What did Sam say?

Y/N: He said no

Dean: Then why would I say yes?

Y/N: Cause he’s not the boss of you

Dean: *internally* It’s a trap, it’s a trap, it’s a-

[deadsetobsessions]

REVERSE TROPE WRITING PROMPT BY @out-of-jams

ACCIDENTALLY KIDNAPPING A MAFIA BOSS

In Tucker's defense, he thought he was doing someone a favor. A life saving favor, in fact.

"What the fuck-!” The red helmeted guy yelped as a deceptively strong Tucker yanked him onto the bike and sped away. Before Tucker could explain, the GIW agents behind them got in a lucky shot and hit the helmeted liminal with a strong blast to the head.

Clearly, his gear wasn’t equipped with anti-ecto protections, because the guy slumped over on Tucker’s arms. This was bad, because Tucker now had to maneuver about 230 pounds of Gotham muscle while speeding away from government agents. He flicked on the jammer so they couldn’t track his and red helmets’s ecto signature.

“STOP!”

“Ah, shit.” Tucker cursed as he somehow managed to gather up red-helmet’s body and stabilize the bike. “C’mon, Tuck, you can do this.”

Blasts of anti-ecto tech slammed into buildings around him. Luckily, Gotham was used to this kind of shit so people just moved out of the way before going back to their day. Tucker wove around traffic, trying to lure the agents into slamming face first into some signposts.

“Stop damaging the local infrastructure!” Tucker yelled back at them, speeding up.

“WELL REIMBURSE THE PEOPLE AND THE CITY LATER! TELL US WHERE PHANTOM IS!!”

“Over my dead body, you jerks!” Tucker took a sharp right, catching red helmet before the man could slip off. He sped up and took the ramp downwards, heart beating loudly in his ears as he strained his senses to figure out- ah, they took the ramp upwards. Good. Now, all he has to do is bring red helmet back to home base.

“Oh my god. I kidnapped him,” Tucker groaned, slapping at his face before quickly placing his hands back on the handle bar once the bike teetered over with red helmet’s weight. “I’m a criminal. Oh my god.”

Then, as he found his way back, “…Well, it’s not like I wasn’t a criminal before, with the whole resisting arrest thing.”

——

Tucker dumped the red helmet liminal onto the couch of their shared apartment and went to take a shower. When he got out ten minutes later, he found Danny and Sam staring at the helmet guy. Tucker pushed up his glasses (after letting them defog from the shower) and greeted them.

“Hey, guys! I found him while I was running away from Agent L and J.”

“You okay?” Danny asked, eyes immediately flicking over Tucker for injuries.

“Yeah, I’m good. They’re horrible shots.”

“I thought Danny was the one who brought home strays but you…?” Sam commented, arms crossed and a purple painted nail tapping at her arm. “Wait. Isn’t this… that crime lord? What was his name?”

“Red Hood?” Danny offered, turning back to look at the guy on their couch.

Tucker paled. “Oh, no.”

Guns? Check.

Red Helmet? Check.

Bat-Symbol? Check.

Shit.

They collectively stared at the guy in silence.

“…Tucker,” Sam slowly said. “Did you accidentally kidnap a crime lord?”

“Hey, I didn’t want him to get killed! He’s liminal! Even more than us, except for Danny.” Tucker grumbled. “Man, this is why I leave the hero-ing to Danny. I do one good thing and suddenly I have a crime lord on my couch.”

“My couch,” Sam corrected, as she was the one that furnished their apartment.

“What do we do now?”

“Eat dinner,” Tucker said. “I’m famished.”

Sam nodded. “Wait for him to wake up and hope he doesn’t shoot us the moment he wakes up. Then, we explain.”

Danny grabbed all the visible guns he could see. Tucker went to start dinner. Sam supervised, because her boys were idiots and now she had a crime lord in her apartment.

——

Jason groaned, head swimming in a sea of dull throbbing pain as his eyes fluttered open.

Then he remembered he was abducted, and bolted up right. He paused as a series of quick observations made its way to his consciousness.

One. He’s not tied up. Weird, because everyone knows that he’s a weapon even without his weapons.

Two. His weapons were right there, just in reach.

Three. He was surrounded by teenagers and/or young adults who were all scrolling along on their phones.

“Oh, hey, he’s awake! Hi!” The Wayne bait said, electric blue eyes fixing itself on Jason. “Were you aware you died?”

Jason went rigid, hundreds of way to-

“Danny!” A scolding tone cut of Jason’s immediate panic. Two couch pillows slammed into Danny’s face, courtesy of goth girl and nerdy but strong.

“Dude, why do you start with that? Why are you like this?” His… possible kidnapper? asked, exasperatedly flinging his hands into the air as he rolled his eyes.

Goth girl scowled. “Boys. Crime lord, couch, remember?”

“Hey, in my defense, I died too!”

And that- as Jason remained dumbfounded in this circle of tomfoolery- was what snapped Jason out of his daze.

“You what?” He rasped out.

And when he saw them open their mouths at the same time, Jason just knew his headache was going worse.

——

Tucker, effortlessly plucking the actual red hood from the streets: and I whoop-

Jason, whose type is strong, nerdy, and tall: *heart eyes* *but not really because he’s unconscious*

——

Sam: “this is my boyfriend Danny and our other boyfriend Tucker.”

Jason enters chat:

Sam: “this is my boyfriend Danny and our other boyfriend Tucker and his boyfriend, the Red Hood.”

——

[leelarots]

sad today. my favourite part of the feet of clay's conclusion is vetinari clearly trying not to show how amusing he finds vimes's comments

also some bonus interactions i found funny in the same convo

[mlobsters]

jared padalecki and jensen ackles spn dc con 2024 - main panel (youtube)

Q: In season 5 episode Dark Side of the Moon, Sam and Dean found out that they were soulmates and it was never really addressed after that, so what did they think when they found that out? Jared: I think they knew.

[random-twst-things]

Mc/Y/N/Yuu, dressed as Crowley: Trick or Treat 🙂

Crowley: Why are you dressed as me, perfect?

Mc/Y/N/Yuu: Because it's my costume? 🤨

Mc/Y/N/Yuu: All you gotta do is go to Sam's shop and say "make me look stupid"

Mc/Y/N/Yuu, posing like Crowley: 😼

Crowley: He- Don't stand like that!

Mc/Y/N/Yuu: What? That's how you stand?

Crowley: That's not how I stand-

Mc/Y/N/Yuu: This is exactly what you look like-!

Crowley: I didn't stand like that-!

Crowley, looks down and sees grim: ...

Grim, wearing a realistic crow head, claws and all: 😼

The pose in question that Mc/Y/N/Yuu did:

[super-incorrect]

Y/n - Dean annoyed me today so I told him that I can't wait to see what he has planned for our special day tomorrow.

Sam - But there is nothing special tomorrow.

Y/n - But there is something special about watching the colour leave his face as panic takes over.

[ericshoney]

Mini Sam ~ Sam Golbach

Summary: Your a YouTuber who is close friends with Sam and Colby, but everyone knows you as Mini Sam.

Warnings: Swearing

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You started YouTube when you were seventeen, now your twenty-one. You started with the basic YouTube videos along with some vlogs and soon started to collab with others. This led to you becoming close with Sam and Colby, you appearing on their channel a lot and them on yours.

Over the years the fans noticed how similar you were to Sam, resulting in you becoming Mini Sam. You didn't mind as it was a cute nickname and made watching your TikTok more fun.

You sat on the sofa, waiting for Sam and Colby to get ready. You all had planned on just having a chill day at the mall. You just scrolled through your phone quietly as you waited, it felt like ages, but really was only ten minutes.

Once the boys were ready, you all left, Colby choosing to drive. Music played in the car softly as you drove in the traffic.

"Can we get coffee first please?" You asked.

"Sure we can." Sam answered.

You smiled as you played on your phone, chatting with the guys a bit. When you arrived, you parked up and headed to the first coffee shop you saw.

"What do you want?" Colby asked you, as he looked at the various drinks.

"My usual please." You replied, making the older male nod.

You then pulled out some money, going to pay, but Sam stopped you, using his card to pay.

"I could have paid, you know." You said quietly.

"I know, but it's my treat." He responded with a smile.

"Thank you." You said.

He smiled again as you all waited to get your drinks before sitting down. You found a seat where you could watch people walk past and chat quietly.

"Oh my God, look at how cute that baby is!" You exclaimed, watching a mother walk in with a cute baby in her arms.

"You just love children." Colby said, making you laugh.

"He's so cute." You mumbled, watching as the mother bounced the baby, making him giggle.

"You have to agree right?" You added, looking at the guys.

"Of course, any baby is cute." Sam answered, making you smile.

"Sam and Mini Sam. Both the same." Colby said with a laugh.

You two smiled and sipped your drinks, which just so happened to be the same.

"Don't you just sometimes wanna get up and scream to see how people will react?" Colby randomly questioned.

"Nope." You and Sam both replied.

"Creepy~" Colby sang, making you laugh.

You then went for a walk around the mall, hoping to not get into much chaos.

[bloo-the-dragon]

waffl

(this is platonic)

[flatstarcarcosa]

actually now that my brain swerved in that direction has miles ever said why the boys quit bein’ cops because if he doesn’t i’m making a list of the funniest reasons why they stopped being cops and sticking to it

[literaryavenger]

Obsessed

Summary: Your crush on Bucky may be getting out of control.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x F!Reader

Warnings: Dramatic Reader. Language. Angst. Fluff. My poor attempts at being Funny.

Word Count: 1.4K I'm physically incapable of making anything short.

A/N: I wrote this in like 2 hours and I don't even know what this is, just... Yeah.

Masterlist

This is terrible.

This is the worst thing that's ever happened to you.

This is the worst thing that's ever happened to anyone. It's just the most horrible, dreadful, awful thing that could’ve ever happen to yo-

“Would you stop staring at him for fuck's sakes!” Natasha's hissed words make your eyes snap to her and finally away from the metal armed Supersoldier lifting weights. Shirtless.

You don't know when Bucky stopped feeling self-conscious enough to allow him to workout in nothing but a pair of gym shorts, but it has become literal torture for you.

Needless to say, Bucky's current level of undress is making it impossible for you to concentrate on the stretching you're supposed to be doing before your sparring match with Natasha.

But your very thoughtful and not at all exasperated friend makes sure to keep your attention on her during the entirety of our match by thoroughly kicking your ass.

What a lovely best friend you have.

Anyways.

Your entire mood shifts with one not intentionally overheard conversation. Steve enters the gym and goes straight to Bucky, who was putting his weight set down.

“She’s here!” Is all the blonde says to his friend and your heart stops at the way Bucky’s face lights up with a smile, not needing any more information before following Steve out of the gym.

She’s here? Who the fuck is she? Does Bucky have a girlfriend? And most importantly, she’s here? In the Compound?

Natasha can almost see the gears turning in your brain as you make no attempts to move from the mat after she knocked you on your ass for the hundredth time today. You didn’t even seem to notice her hand offering you help to get up, your eyes still looking where Bucky was just a moment ago, staring at nothing in particular while your brain drowns in your overthinking.

Natasha sighs and decides to end the match here, kneeling down in front of you and placing her hands on your shoulders, shaking you gently to snap you out of it.

“Don’t overthink this.” She tells you when she’s sure she has your attention. “It’s probably just a friend visiting.” She tries to comfort you, but you both know that’s highly unlikely. 

Bucky has no other friends outside the team. He doesn’t know how to talk to civilians anymore after everything he’s been through, and gave up trying to after the hundredth time he saw fear in a person’s eyes just by recognizing him. So his friend circle now includes the team and the agents of SHIELD that are not intimidated by him. Point is, every friend he has already lives in the Compound.

So who the fuck is here just to see him? 

Natasha can see that this is a lost battle, your eyes barely concentrating on her as you start drowning in your mind again. All she can do when you’re like this is try to distract you and keep you out of your head. So she takes your hand and helps you up, leading the way to the common room to watch one of your beloved romcoms together, because that’s how much she loves you.

Big mistake.

“Y/N! Y/N!” The excited high-pitched voice came just seconds after you set foot in the common room. And that’s about the only warning you got before the excited 5-year-old jumped on you, your reflexes thankfully quick enough to catch her.

“Hi, Maguna!” You say while chuckling as the little girl hugs you. “You seem excited today. Did you get into the sugar cabinet again?”

Morgan giggles at your joke and shakes her hand before taking your face in her little hands and dramatically saying, “No! A princess came to visit uncle Bucky! A real princess.”

You frown, confused at what she’s talking about, before you look around the room and finally notice everyone else in it. Pepper and Tony are on the couch, looking at you lovingly as you interact with their daughter.

You love Morgan, she’s like a little sister. You never miss an opportunity to babysit her and you spend as much time with her as you can. She also loves you, out of all the Avengers you’re her favorite, much to everyone’s dismay. She calls them all ‘aunt’ and ‘uncle’, but you’re just Y/N. You’re her big sister, you don’t need a title. Which is why you're the only one other than Tony allowed to call her 'Maguna'.

Then you notice the other people in the room: Steve, Bucky and… Shuri. The fucking Princess of Wakanda, standing in the common room of the Avengers Compound and just smiling at you as you carry Morgan.

You’ve never met Shuri, but you know she played an important part in deprogramming the Winter Soldier out of Bucky, and you’re grateful to her for it. She’s important to Bucky, and you can’t believe you forgot Bucky has Wakandan friends.

You put Morgan down on the ground again and the little girl takes your hand and aggressively steers you towards where Steve, Bucky and Shuri are standing, clearly thrilled to be in the presence of a real life princess.

“Hi, I’m Shuri.” She offers you her hand when you get close enough and you shake it with your free hand while introducing yourself.

There’s a bit of an awkward pause and you’re about to say the first thing that pops into your head when Morgan thankfully saves you by pulling on your hand, making you look at her. She tells you to come close and, chuckling, you kneel beside her so she can whisper conspiratorially in your ear.

“She’s a princess and she’s really pretty, but I still like you better.” She whispers and you can’t help but laugh.

God, you love this little girl.

You smile brightly at her and launch a tickle attack, her adorable giggles filling the room as everyone looks at you two with warm smiles.

Your attention is solely on Morgan, until you unintentionally hear the whispered conversation between Shuri and Bucky.

“So, this is the girl, huh? She’s pretty.” Shuri says and your heart skips a beat. 

You glance at them as discreetly as you can while still tickling Morgan, only to find Bucky looking at someone behind you. You turn around less carefully and see Sharon just entered the room, and she's also looking at Bucky with a smirk. You quickly return your attention to Morgan, but your mind is going a thousand miles a minute.

Of course he’d like someone more like Sharon. She’s pretty, she’s talented, she’s a total badass and she’s not afraid to go after what she wants.

She’s not a mass of anxiety in the shape of a woman that overthinks everything and becomes a flustered mess every time she’s even near Bucky.

It’s time to admit it to yourself: Bucky just doesn’t see you like that and you need to move on. 

Natasha is right, your obsession with Bucky needs to end.

What you don’t see is Bucky almost glaring at Sharon because he knows damn well why she’s smirking. She came in just before Shuri whispered to Bucky, when he was very intent on looking at you with heart eyes as you played with Morgan.

Just before you looked at him, Bucky noticed Sharon and he had to hold in a groan at her because he knows that she’s never gonna let him live this down.

Both Sharon and Steve have tried really hard to convince Bucky that you like him back and he should make a move on you. But Bucky, being as stubborn as they come, never believes them.

He obviously makes you uncomfortable, you’re always stuttering when he’s around and you avoid eye contact whenever possible. He’s just glad that you can stand his presence enough for the two of you to work together when necessary and to hang out with the rest of the team without problems.

So he just enjoys looking at you from a distance. He loves watching you play with Morgan and his thoughts always run wild with images of you playing like that with kids that are yours and his.

But he knows that’s never going to happen. Why would you like a damaged, PTSD ridden soldier that can’t even make it through the night without waking up from a nightmare? No, that’s definitely not your type.

Bucky accepts the truth: He doesn’t deserve you and you don’t see him like that anyways. 

It doesn’t matter that Sam thinks he’s obsessed, that won’t stop him from looking at you whenever he’s lucky enough to get a glimpse of his little ray of sunshine.

Requested taglist: @vicmc624 @matchat3a @nerd-without-a-cause @sapphirebarnes @cjand10 @mostlymarvelgirl @julvrs @blackhawkfanatic @lillianacristina @armystay89 @imdoingbetternow @spookyparadisesheep @elizalexwil @aceofhearts25 @dontworryboutitsweetheartxx-blog @justab-eautifulmess @buggy14 @thedonswife13

[kiame-sama]

Losing the Bet with the First Year: Having to Imitate an NRC Staffer

Reader: *Imitates an NRC employee*

NRC employee imitated by Reader: *accidentally passing by* Is the adoption registration valid for children without ID cards?

Warnings; platonic yanderes, platonic yandere staff, mention of imitation, mention of adoption, scolding, lost bet,

- Trein will be switching classrooms for the day when he hears the slightest of commotions ahead in the hall. Naturally, he is going to see just what is going on and assign extra work as needed for whoever was making such a commotion.

- What he didn't expect to see was you dressed in clothes that looked near identical to his own with your hair slicked back in a style much like his own. Even Lucius had to glance between the two of you a few times.

- Just seeing his favorite student dressed the same way he did gave him an intensely nostalgic feeling that harkened back to when he was raising his daughters. He was going to have to keep pestering Crowley to allow him to adopt you already.

- Divus was taking a few of his dalmatians for a walk when he noticed a gathering of students around a central point. Naturally, he had little interest in figuring out what the common cur got up to in their freetime, but they were his cur and he was expected to keep them in line. Where the dogs gather, fights are not far behind.

- It took him by complete surprise to see you in the center of the commotion, wearing a coat much like his own and even sporting copies of his dual-colored hair and red riding crop. Vil- who no doubt put this ensamble together- was standing nearby lecturing what seemed to be a group of first-years about the proper care that goes into tailoring good clothes. You were less than amused and he gathered that you had been put up to copying him by the other first-years.

- He can't help but think that the style suits you much more than your usual uniform and he finds himself wondering what other clothes of his would fit your aesthetic. Certainly he could train his dalmatians to obey your orders as well. It would also help him keep the usual mutts away from you if you looked and behaved more like he did. He would have to bribe talk with Crowley about your future in Twisted Wonderland.

- Vargas was running laps around the school when he heard a familiar whistle. Feeling compelled to see who was doing what, he was surprised to find several first-years doing pushups at your behest.

- He didn't realize at first that you were wearing what looked like his typical outfit he had on during classes. The red windbreaker paired with fitted black sweats that all had golden trim actually looked rather nice on you as if you fit them just as well as he did. You were so focused on the first-years in front of you, that you didn't notice Coach Vargas watching in surprise.

- "And when you're done, you guys are gonna run ten laps!" The coach felt himself smiling at your authoritative tone as you truly began to embody his behavior. He had been looking for an assistant coach and you certainly didn't need magic to be athletic. Perhaps, if he could adopt you from Crowley, he could convince the Headmage to make an assistant role for you.

- Sam is taking a quick break from the store when he hears a familiar greeting, "Hey there, little imps!" And of course, he needs to see who is using his good material and why. A group of first-years are laughing as he slowly approaches the group, wondering what all the fuss is about.

- You- his favorite best customer- are standing in the middle of the group of first-years, top-hat perched on your head and purple suit fitted to your figure. The tailcoat and fine details of the suit lend themselves to the overall look which was so inherently Sam that he almost believed you could be his kid. You know, if you hadn't randomly been pulled to Twisted Wonderland by the dark mirror and had no obvious relation to him, that is.

- He's not one to stop students from having a good time and you were certainly rocking the unique style well enough that he couldn't be mad about it. Perhaps he would have to give you a job around the store or some special discount seeing as you may as well be his apprentice given how often you were in his humble shop. Crowley couldn't be mad that Sam was looking out for his best customer, right?

- The Deadbeat Headmage had been doing his usual aimless wandering rounds when he heard the sound of someone being scolded by professor Mozus Trein. Naturally, as the nice guy he was, he was going to snoop see who was in trouble and why.

- He certainly didn't expect to see someone adorned in a mask much like his own under the scrutiny of the history professor. It took him a moment to realize it was you and he was frankly impressed with the accuracy of your imitation. You wore his long coat on your shoulders, the black feathers sticking out from around the collar and shoulders. You did not wear the golden talons like he did, but your black gloves and top-hat were close enough to show you were trying to copy his appearance. It was a good imitation and had just enough sparkle to the vest that it was almost completely accurate.

- "-and to think you are going around school dressed as the Headmage! Why, he would be quite cross with you if he were here!" Without missing a beat, Crowley was quick to interrupt the conversation, picking up one of your hands and using his magic to give you your own set of the golden talons he wore so often. "If you're going to be my ward and dress like me, you may as well be as accurate as possibly, my Little Chick. And look, because I'm such a kind person, I gave you your own talons! Now we can match, like true family."

[book-place-incorrect-quotes]

Y/N: *holding a python* Guys, I impulsively bought a snake, what should I name him?

Sam: I’m sorry, YOU DID WHAT–

Dean: *who’s waited his whole life for this moment* William Snakepeare

[kvitka97]

🥰

Transcript (thanks to @patricided on X)