#pinterest i am killing you give me sources PLEASE

[wellenklavier]

A really fantastic title for an interview with Mick Karn in Sounds

If anyone knows the issue date please let me know, I couldn't find a legible enough scan to warrant including the smaller text :(

[ryuuaka713]

Soukoku & The Red Camellias

Ok, I have been thinking a lot of this lately, so I am just gonna let this all out.

You guys know this official art, right? Right?

This is literally one of my most favorite SKK official art. Like I legit thought that this is a fan-art until I saw an entire comment section in pinterest basically summarizing: “I can’t believe this is NOT a fanart”. I literally lost my shit that day because MY GOD this is so CLOSE! I’ve been in the BSD fandom since January, and I have been obsessing over Soukoku since Dead Apple. 

But anyway, this official art--I showed this to my sister who has no idea what the anime is about, and I wanted an opinion from an outsider in regards of this official art just for the fun of it. And guess what she said: Apart from being GAY, she thinks that their relationship is almost similar to Romeo and Juliet (YEP! HER EXACT WORDS!). It is interesting, not just because these two act more like an aggressive version of R&J (or the anti-thesis of it), it is also the fact that the more I looked into this pic, the more I can see the whole bitter-sweetness to it.

So I decided to look up the meaning of Camellia flowers in which these two have been associated with by the fandom.

(OK, the next thing I am going to say will be something that not everyone will like. But please, hear me out)

I notice a lot of people (shippers to be precise), say that the Camellias represent love, desire, and longing. This meaning is based on WESTERN interpretation. But what about the JAPANESE symbolism of it?

In the Wikipedia version for the Hanakotoba (Japanese Floriography) the (Red) Tsubaki (the Japanese name for the Camellia) is indeed associated with “Love” (not far from the Western interpretation), but what’s interesting is that it also says: “Perishing with Grace”. Ok, Wikipedia is not entirely reliable, so I decided to do more research, and from what I’ve gathered, the Camellias are associated with Love (Again, derived from Western influence or the source is not that reliable), Divinity, and finally--Death.

So technically speaking, the reason why Tsubaki is associated with the divine is that it is used in tea ceremonies because it does not interfere with the scent of tea. Furthermore, it somehow evokes a sense of sacredness (whether directly to a Kami or not) to it, and you can see why this is almost in the same threshold as the Cherry Blossoms in terms of Japanese associations. Indeed, the Tsubaki is called the “Japanese Rose”, and very much like the Cherry Blossoms, these flowers carry a heavy meaning--Death.

Brutal as this may sound, I think the subject of Death behind the flowers is something that connects the most to Soukoku. 

But before I go over that, it should be known that the Tsubaki is associated with “Noble Death”--this comes from the imagery of how the buds of the flower, when wilted, falls as a whole immediately instead of petal by petal. And many called this blossom as a form of “bad luck” because it resembles Decapitation. With that being said, the Tsubaki can be related as a symbolic imagery of a Samurai’s death (since the process of their execution involves having their heads cut off). And thus, it should emphasize the unwavering loyalty of the warrior (it makes sense as to why the petals are intact with the bud--but this is just my interpretation), and why the flower symbolizes a “noble death”.

Now what does got to do with Soukoku?

This applies more to Chuuya as the whole “sacredness”/”divinity” of the Tsubaki can be easily associated with the fact that he possessed the God of Calamity. And because Corruption means total destruction, Chuuya’s fate is literally death like what the Tsubaki implies. However, what I find even more interesting is that after reading how these flowers are associated with the samurai, this is very similar to Chuuya’s case. Chuuya in BSD is the personification of loyalty, specifically to the PM. 

With his relationship with Dazai, it is a little bit different since Chuuya never wants to be his Dog (the most common symbol of loyalty). But what’s interesting enough is that he remains--CONSTANTLY trusts Dazai. In other words, he knows his motivations, trusts him, and would immediately jump into action. Chuuya would go as far as using the very thing that will kill him while keeping in mind that Dazai has a plan (e.g. Dead Apple). With that being said, this is exactly why Chuuya is the one who seems to be watching over Dazai while the latter is sleeping in the official art above. And the fact that the flower just rests on his open palm is well-connected to the aesthetic and “grace” of the Tsubaki. Chuuya’s corruption is brutally horrible, but the concept of his loyalty and trust is something that we can at least admire about him.

What about Dazai? Well, this is the part where things get a little complicated. One thing for sure, the whole death symbolism can be easily associated to his suicidal tendencies. But even so, this is still tied up (literally and figuratively speaking) to his relationship with Chuuya. Dazai said that his ideal suicide should be “clean and proper”--in other words, without burdening anyone. And yet, his death will always be tethered to Chuuya’s. This is seen when they are 15 when Rimbaud proposed that he must kill both Chuuya and Dazai to protect his crimes. This is again brought up in (SPOILERS!!!) Stormbringer when Mori brings up that if Dazai decides to give up and die, no one would save Chuuya (END SPOILERS!!!). In short they are inseparable. 

And because of that, Dazai can see how he can easily influence the fate of his partner-- the very same person who is prone to death despite his desire to live. Thus, one of the reasons why he fights side by side with Chuuya. it is not just Chuuya’s complete trust in him that makes their partnership effective, but it is also his recognition of the boy’s desire to live. And that’s why we have this official art:

In this official art, it is not as delicate as the first one, but we see the Camellias again. This time, it is Dazai holding the flowers, and he is clutching them in his fists. Personally, I see this as him grasping to that life-line while Chuuya is using corruption. While Chuuya, his corruption and the camellias are about the concept of potential death, in Dazai’s case--the camellia serves as a “reminder of death” (not the actual death). Thus, why he is clutching them. After all, he recognizes that Chuuya doesn’t want to die (unlike him). Not to mention, Chuuya would willingly lay down his life to him (and vise versa). In other words, it just shows that with the symbolism of the Tsubaki, both characters--despite the “hate” they have for each other--are always connected, and it is through Death. Death because of their circumstances, or because of their characterizations.

Furthermore, the complexity of Tsubaki being this beautiful flower that is considered as sacred, a love token, and a symbolic imagery of death--parallels so much with the complexity of their relationship. I am not going to dive in further with the analysis of their relationship since I know a handful of people who are excellent in doing that. But what I’m saying here: the Camellias are not only a love token, the same way you can’t say that Dazai and Chuuya’s relationship is like a love-hate relationship (it is way more complicated than that).

With that being said, there is bittersweet connotation in their relationship. It is Romeo and Juliet in a sense that they are connected by tragedy, regardless whether they are in the same organization or not.

And that’s it, thanks for reading my ted-talk!

[wandanatfluff]

The Life That's Left To Live - Part I - Take Me Home

Series (This part:) Fluff

Prologue | Part I

Summary series: You’re a little girl when the avengers find you. Natasha becomes kind of a mother to you. Then about 7 years later when you’re 21 you go live with the avengers again for a while, because they need your help with something. The avengers are like a family to you. Wanda is still new to the avengers and doesn’t know what happened in your past. You sleep in Wanda’s room in an extra bed and the two of you become friends. You are a quite happy, social and spontaneous girl, but there’s a sad/depressed side to you that sometimes comes to the surface.

Summary of this part: Natasha calls you with information about your brother and you go to the Avengers compound, where you meet Wanda.

Pairing: Natasha (mother figure/mentor) x Female Reader Wanda (platonic (for now at least)) x Female Reader

Warnings for this part: -

Word count: 2.2 K

A/n: To be honest I think it turned out okay, I spent quite a while on this. Title: Take Me Home, by Chord Overstreet. The fic isn’t directly based or related to the song. The title just fits ;-). The series title is a line from Love Is War, by RUNAGROUND. I hope you enjoy it!

Source: Pinterest

Absentmindedly you listen to the person in front of you. Some annoying colleague that is going on and on about a something that you would have done wrong. They had been going on for almost ten minutes and by now, you had stopped listening. Your mind drifted off to happy memories. It was something you did quite often. By reliving old memories once in a while, they would become recent in your mind again, which made it easier to go back to them, when you were feeling low. You thought about your younger self on the back of your brother’s bike, your small arms wrapped around his waist, your head pressed against his back. It had been his birthday and he had gotten a new bike. You didn’t like bikes, but when he asked for you to ride along the neighborhood with him, you gave in. Your childhood was filled with a lot of fear, but your brother always seemed to take that away. He was in almost all of your joyful memories. He was your safe place.

Your phone chimed, snapping you back into reality. You excused yourself from the ‘conversation’ and left the room. Once you close the door, you answer your phone.

“I owe you Nat! You saved me!”

“Hey Y/n… What did I save you from?”

“Some colleague, who was being incredibly tedious.”

“Need me to kill anyone?”

“Uhm… No. But what are you calling about?”

“We got new information about your brother and we need your help with it.” You fell silent for a moment at the mention of your brother.

“Oh... What is it?”

“I’m sorry Y/n, I can’t tell you over the phone. You’ll have to come to the compound.”

“Okay… I can do that. I’ll leave tomorrow morning and be there around dinner time?”

“Perfect. See you then.”

After cooking yourself some dinner you went to your room to pack. You dug deep in your closet to find your weekend bag. It had been a while since your last trip. You don’t travel that much. To be honest, you don’t travel at all. Your daily routine leaves just enough time for your daily work-out, some me-time and occasionally a movie. Staying busy avoids overthinking stuff, or well… overthinking more specific things. It took you a while to build up a routine. Have breakfast, work out, drive to the office, do your work, pretend to listen to the gossip from your fellow colleagues during the lunch break. Not that anything about your life is very challenging, but it’s just enough to keep you satisfied and to survive. Every now and then when you have a day off, you go shopping with a friend.

You are quite the cheerful girl. You are spontaneous and kind, people get along with you. You have a few friends, but none really close. The only close friends or family you have, are Nat, Steve, Tony, Clint, Thor and Bruce and you haven’t seen them in the while.

You had to empty your entire closet, but you finally found your white weekend bag with the subtle, pastel flowers pattern. You smile at it. It had been a gift from Nat. You used to have a boring and old grey bag, so she had bought you a new one. After you throw the bag on your bed, you start to fill it with clothes. You had no idea how long you’d be gone, so you packed for five days. Once your bag was fully stuffed you zipped it closed and threw it over your shoulder, making you way back to the living room.

You throw your bag next to the counter and are just about to get yourself some coffee, when the bel rings. You grab your phone and see Natasha standing in front of your door through the camera. Natasha had bought you a doorbell with a camera, to be sure you were as safe as possible when she wasn’t there. Aware of the camera she smiled at you through it. You chuckle at the sight and walk to the door to open it for her. Moments like this remind you of how amazing Natasha is. She had the key to you appartement, but chose not to use it, so she wouldn’t unnecessarily scare you.

“Surpriseee, figured I’d pick you up myself!”

“Hey Nat, come in!”

You take her jacket and hang it on the coat rack.

“How are you doing?”

“Good, actually. Can I get you something to drink?”

“Just coffee, please.”

“Got it.”

You go back to the counter and get yourself and Nat some coffee. You open the fridge and get two pieces of the pie that is left from your graduation ceremony. With two slices of cake and the coffee you go to the living room. You hand Natasha, who has sat down on the couch, her coffee and put the cake on the side table.

“Oehh, is there something to celebrate?”

“Yup… I got a job!”

“Y/n! I am so proud of you. I knew you could do it!” Tears begin to well in Natasha’s eyes and she puts down her coffee to give you a hug. You bury you head in her neck and let out a small sniff. She knew what it meant for you to get your first real job. The small party one of your friends threw had been basic. Everyone had congratulated you, but Natasha was the only one who truly took her time to express her happiness. She was the only one who knew what it meant to you. It had been a long way, a long, long way, but you made it! You did it!

She had been there with Steve when you graduated. She had driven six hours, just because she knew what it would mean to you, having her there. It had been a surprise, she hadn’t told you she was coming, so when you saw her from the stage you had broken down in tears.

You catch up a bit, after which you both go to bed. You turn the sofa into a bed for Natasha so she can sleep on it, but before you rest your eyes, Natasha helps you fill another suitcase with clothing. She laughed at the sight of your single bag and suggested you’d pack another suitcase.

*** After six hours of sleep Natasha wakes you up. You take the time to get out of your bed, you take a shower and put on some make-up. In a pair of light skinny jeans and a lively orange tank top, that complemented you tan, you sit down at the kitchen island. Natasha had made you breakfast and after you finished it, you got in the car. The ride would take about six hours, so before hitting the road, you stopped at the supermarket to get some snacks and drinks for on the way. After three hours you had a pit-stop at the MacDonald’s to get some lunch. You ordered the food via the McDrive and ate it in the car on the parking lot. When the food was finished you hit the road again. You had switched places, meaning Natasha would finish the drive to the compound. Natasha was still sipping from her milkshake in one hand, her other hand on the wheel. You leaned against the door with you head on your arm. You closed your eyes, feeling the warmth of the sun on your skin as you dozed off.

A bump in the road woke you up.

You shot up straight. When you realized there was no danger, you leaned back into you chair, resting you head against the headrest.

“Slept well, princess?” Nat teasingly said.

“Nat!” You stumped her shoulder with your elbow. She grinned, but kept her eyes on the road. A comfortable silence fell and you closed your eyes again, not intending to sleep again though.

“No, but for real. How have you been sleeping?” You knew what she meant. She wanted to know if you still had nightmares. They would still terrorize your nights sometimes. You would wake up sweating and shaking. Wide awake you would sit in the middle of your bed at midnight, tears running down your cheeks.

“Uhm, okay, I guess. Some nights better than others.” She turned her head to look at you, giving you a sweet smile. She laid her hand on your leg, her palm up. You put your hand in hers, giving it a slight squeeze.

“Now we’re talking about sleeping, a few rooms are under renovations, so the rooms are full. You can sleep in Wanda’s room. She has an extra bed on her room.”

“Is she okay with that?”

“I think so.”

“You didn’t ask her!?”

“No, but I’m sure it won’t be a problem.”

“Nat…”

“Just kidding, I told her she would have to share her room with you.”

“And…?”

“She was fine with it.”

*** With your suitcase in your hand, your bag over your shoulder and music in your ears, you enter Wanda’s room. On the right side of the room there’s a king-sized bed with two chairs and a coffee table on the left side of the bed, next to the window that covers the entire back side of the room, providing a view of the trees and water next to the compound. On the left side of the room there is a large wardrobe, a door to the bathroom and in the corner there’s a single bed, parallel to the window. Above the bed there’s a shelf with a plant, some books and a light string. The room wasn’t very decorated, there weren’t many personal items. One wall was painted in a grey tone with a hint of purple and there was a purple bedspread, covering the lower side of Wanda’s bed. On the nightstand was a photo of Wanda, standing next to a boy with white hair. You figured it must be her brother, Natasha had told you about the twins and the tragedy. Apart from the photo and some plants, there was nothing personal in the room.

You walked to the bed you’d be sleeping in and dropped your bags on the floor. You sat down on the bed and with your feet still on the ground you let your back rest on the bed, closing your eyes as you take the time to take in the feeling of home. To be honest you feel more home at the Avengers compound then at your own appartement. After a few minutes you got up from the bed and put on some upbeat music as you start to make the bed.

Singing along to the music cheerfully, you put the duvet in its cover. With both corners of the blanket in your hands you shake the cover over the duvet. With the music in both your ears you didn’t hear someone come in, so when you feel a hand on your shoulder, you are slightly startled. You quickly stop the music and take out your AirPods. You turn around to lay your eyes on a beautiful woman with coper locks flowing over her shoulders.

“You must be Y/n.”

Wanda knew who you were, your name would regularly come up in a conversation. She didn’t know much about you other than your name. You were kind of a mystery to her. She was new to the team and hadn’t personally met you yet. One thing is clear to her, though. No one bothered to mention how gorgeous you were. With a lump in her throat, she looked into your eyes, once you had turned around to face her. The woman that was standing in front of her seemed like a nice, cheerful person. She had a beautiful smile on her face, but there was something in her eyes that showed her happiness hadn’t always been a given. She took her in, her hair up in a high pony tail with curtain bangs accentuating her face, she was wearing an orange tank top, which showed off her tanned skin, on top of light flared jeans and elegant black ankle boots. Jeez, she was beautiful.

“Guilty as charge.” You responded. “It’s my pleasure meeting you…”

Witty too. You reminded her of her brother.

“Wanda.”

“Ah Wanda! Natasha told me so much about you. Nice to finally meet you. Oh, and Natasha said I could sleep here for the time being. Is that okay with you?”

Natasha talked about her? That was a good thing… right? To be honest Wanda was rather intimidated by Natasha. Even though she had been welcomed with open arms into the group, once, you know, she had switched sides, it had been quite hard for her to adjust to the group.

“Yeah, she told me. It’s fine”

“Cool”

“Do you need help with the bed?”

“Oh no, I’m done.”

She noticed the bed was nicely made and saw your weekend bag, half under your bed.

“You can use that dresser if you want, and if you want to hang any of your clothes, you can put them in my closet.”

“Oh thanks!”

“No problem.”

“I was about to start dinner, the rest should be back in an hour.”

“I’ll make sure I’ll be there on time, I wouldn’t want to miss whatever culinary art you intend to make.” You said teasingly.

“Great, I’ll see you in an hour then

[i-prefer-the-term-antihero]

Additionally, your thoughts on Dracula and Adrian from the Netflix adaptation of Castlevania? I find Dracula really tragic, and the ending scene of Season 2 crushed me because I was not expecting Adrian to cry. He’s usually so stoic and calm that I didn’t think he would weep, I expected him to just shrug it off like heroes usually do, but no, when given time to process everything, the first thing he does is break down into tears. Sypha was right in calling him a brooding teen in an adult body.

Ohh man. If you just take a look at my writing blog (or anywhere I post my fanfiction) it’ll become pretty clear pretty quickly how I feel about them XD So far all my Castlevania fics have been about the Tepes Family. Adrian and Drac are my favorite characters in the series!! (Though I do love pretty much all the characters in it.)

YES YES YES!!

They did an incredible job making Drac sympathetic and tragic. I don’t know if you know anything about the games, and granted, they couldn’t put a lot of story stuff in the games, but (at least as far as I’m aware) in most of them it’s like “ya, he was an evil dude who did evil things because he was evil.” So it actually would have been pretty accurate to the source to make him just an unsympathetic, irredeemable villain, but they didn’t and I LOVE them for it. Playing Symphony of the Night (Alucards game) after watching the series l was almost longing for that Drac I know and love from the series, (though it’s fun to see evil Drac too).

As I’ve said, I adore redeemable villains, and they did an amazing job with him, to the point where pretty much everyone in the fandom adores him, which is extremely tough to accomplish—even if you write a redeemable villain well, often large parts of the fandom don’t see it and hate the character. I knew that the point was that they were going to defeat Drac but I have to say, especially since I originally knew nothing of the games, I was hoping they’d save him by the end.

I think the fact that he liked and was kind to Hector and Isaac was evidence that he wasn’t too far gone. I mean, the only two people he genuinely trusted and liked in his court were human…that’s so interesting, I wish it was at least talked about, either in the show or in the fandom. I think he actually liked humans, partially or especially because of Lisa, he just...was so angry, and needed someone to blame. He probably ultimately blamed himself for not being there to save her, and it was just easier to blame the humans he once hated/didn’t understand, even if in reality he didn’t hate them as much as he thought he did...

Doing more thinking and research into the show for my “If These Walls Could Talk” fic I recognize now that symbolically it made sense even within the show that he died when Lisa died (which I can explain more about if you want but id probably end up going off on a long tangent so I’ll save it)...but I still thought practically, in the show, he could have still been redeemed.

Omg I LOVED that. The longer I take to sit with it, the more I realize just how much I loved that they put him crying instead of shaking it off.

It’s very interesting that Drac and Alucard are more openly emotional characters. I might be totally wrong, but as far as I remember, they (...and Lisa when she dies, and probably Isaac in a flashback), are the only main characters we see openly cry. It’s a pretty bold move to make any of your characters emotional like that, but especially your villain, and your bold handsome hero. It’s sooo easy to get emotional characters and emotions wrong…or just offputting to some people...but more on that later.

I think Adrian and Drac are both rather sentimental, in an odd way. Much of Drac’s motivations in the show and even in the games (the times his motivations are explained) had to do with his wives (yes he was married before Lisa in the games...unless Lament of Innocence was retconned...) which is interesting. So many of his decisions are based on emotion. He lets Lisa in just because he likes her, he goes to war with the world because of Lisa, he sits in his study mourning her loss, he let’s Alucard kill him… I also notice very often he digs his nails into his palms until they bleed, presumably because if he didn’t he’d hurt someone else (in the scene where he hurts Alucard, he does this). His sentimentality doesn’t diminish is power as a villain, which is SO difficult to accomplish.

 I am emotional myself so I absolutely love to see emotional characters, but for most people, seeing even a normal character be emotional diminishes them in their eyes, or makes them whiny, so making your villain even a little emotional, and having that not take away from the audiences perception of their power as a villain is sooooooo hard to do, and I applaud them for making a so well-beloved, and still villainous and intimidating, but also emotional (at times) villain.

For Alucard. I don’t see any problem with him being emotional, but it makes even more sense if he’s a teen in an adult’s body—which was indeed portrayed quite well.

Yes that was interesting when he cried when drawing his parents!! I wasn’t expecting that when I saw him drawing them. I was enjoying and intrigued by his story so much, then when he started crying I was caught off guard—but in a good way. It really made me feel for him, and understand that he was still grieving his mother, and that knew the gravity of what he was currently doing.

I think it’s kind of important to show that kind of thing in a situation like this. It’s easy to think Alucard hates his dad, and they need to show the emotion of the situation to make it clear “no he doesn’t hate his dad, this actually breaks his heart, he just knows he has to do this.”

I loved when he was telling Trevor and Sypha about how much the world would lose by killing Dracula. It’s really interesting that he hides his emotion with them, and that Trevor and Sypha are so stoic. The son of Dracula isn’t the guy you expect to be the only hero who cries.

In “For Love” when Trevor’s like “Don’t get weepy about it” I was sitting there, sobbing, like “No, please get weepy about it! Let the boy cry for goodness sake!! Give me some emotion!!” But I too was not expecting him to cry like he did, and in grieving the death of his parents...

I knew the crying scene was coming because I’d seen pictures of it on here and pinterest, but I had no context for it. In the end it wasn’t just the weeping itself that made the scene so impactful, it was everything surrounding it. I didn’t know it would happen when he was completely alone (and would be for the foreseeable future), and in grieving his parents, or about the ghosts/flashbacks before it (cementing his grief), or that it was literally the last scene of the season, or that there would be no music for both the scene and the credits thereafter.

And that was what really got me.

Because, firstly, we never got to see any flashbacks to his childhood, and that was what I was begging for the entire series (and hence why its what I write about). To finally get it, and it not to just be something the audience gets to see, but something Alucard himself is seeing... a happy memory he’s seeing when he knows that is completely gone, he cannot hope to have it again, and for him to now be in his father’s place…that’s heartbreaking. Like just having your character cry—let alone those kinds of full-on sobs—is painful enough, showing a son grieving his parents is a particularly heart wrenching kind of sadness, but showing that he is haunted by memories of those parents he lost—not only lost but one of which he killed, and, if SOTN is canon for the show, the other of which he could have saved—of a happy childhood, and he is alone with these memories for the foreseeable future...that is truly heart wrenching.

Also the scene with Trevor and Sypha in the wagon earlier in the episode was super sweet, they could have easily put the Adrian crying scene earlier, and had the Trevor and Sypha scene be the last scene of the season (and Trevor’s game actually does end with them looking into the sunset, so ending with the last scene of “For Love” would be accurate as well), and left it on a positive note, and the audience would have been left with a completeness. But they made a conscious choice put his crying scene last, and it was so powerful, because it made you remember that at the end of the day, he isn’t just our bold handsome hero, he was a son who lost both his parents, and that, to him, this isn’t really a triumph, but a loss. It also kinda confirmed that Drac wasn’t an "evil guy, end of story". That there was reason to grieve him, and to show his son grieving, and to leave it there because of it. It was a personal gravity too

In the end, it was the lack of music in the scene, and even more so during the credits, so theres only his tears, and all you are left with in the end is this amplified emptiness that really did me in. I think I literally sat there, tear tracks on my face, my mouth open when I hit the credits.

Playing Symphony of the Night after watching the show is really interesting in exploring his character. I knew there was very little story, so I wasn’t expecting much from the story, but I actually found that I was beyond excited whenever there actually was some story, and the few lines they did say are stuck with me.

Maria comments early on that Alucard’s not very good at talking. At first I just chalked it up to...weird translations or whatever. But the more I played the game and the more I thought about him in the show...I think she’s right. He’s not very good at talking, yet if and when he does talk he’s quite eloquent, and precise with his words. (This actually makes him a somewhat difficult character to write). I wonder if perhaps this has some connection to his emotionalness. He’s very careful with what he says, and this may spread to what he does—such as being careful when he shows emotion. I’m curious why he’s like this. It could just be his nature, but I wonder if as a kid he was ever hated because he was a vampire—maybe people made fun of him, and he cried, and they made more fun of him because of it—and he learned both to hide his emotions, and that he had to be very deliberate and show people he didn’t mean any ill will with his words. (And he looks older than he is so people might call him immature for acting his mental age). All very speculative, of course. But it’d be fun to write about!

Also, another thing from SOTN that is related to this topic, there was a fight that really struck me (enough I actually wrote a fic about it (inverted recurrence)). SOTN takes plays 300 years after the events of The Netflix Series (aka Dracula’s Curse). Most of the bosses don’t seem to have a lot of meaning story-wise, they’re just there for you to fight. The other day I (Alucard) walked into a boss room...and there were Trevor, Sypha, and Grant (who was omitted from the Netflix series). They were fake versions of them, of course. And there’s no dialogue in the fight so maybe I’m just speculating, but what struck me was that the fact that Dracula could use them against him probably means he still cares about them, even after 300 years. It probably also means that they’re some of the only friends he’s ever had. Granted, he was asleep for a good chunk of those 300 years, still. It goes back to that sentimental-ness I was talking about earlier.

I few years ago I watched the Gravity Falls commentaries, and from them I got a lot of the writing advice I still think about and use today. Alex Hirsch said something on this subject which I really liked which is “Hold your tears.” When a character cries they’ve broken, that’s as far as they can go. So if you make a character cry when the audience themselves doesn’t feel the weight of the scene, or it doesn’t feel like the character has broken yet, it can feel like too...much/cheesy, and distance the audience. especially with cartoons where the way it’s drawn can actually affect your sympathy for the character (it can look weird or accentuated).

They did such an awesome job with this by literally holding his tears until the very end. I don’t know how other, non-emotional people felt about it, but Ive don’t know if I’ve ever seen tears used so well in a show, pack such a punch. To have it not just be a part of the scene but literally the focus, and at the end...it was powerful.

Sorry for the long response, and more importantly, I’m beyond sorry for taking so so SOOO long to respond. I hope you enjoy my response, if you see it <3

P.S. For anyone else who made it all the way to the end, I actually have a Castlevania sideblog now: @symphonyofthewrite !! I’d be beyond happy to recieve asks like this over there, if you’d like to hear more of my thoughts!!

[codenameantarctica]

‎Prince Josua ‘Lackhand’ of Erkynland in TvTropes

from Tad William’s “Memory, Sorrow and Thorn”

BEWARE OF SPOILERS!

All Your Base Are Belong to Us: Due to his bother Elias calling onto otherworldly forces Josua finally loses his battle for his stronghold Naglimund. Him and a crowd of few can flee while the 'monsters' kill everyone else inside, earning Josua the mock "Prince of Rubble" by one of the Norns.

Handicapped Badass: Having only one hand does not stop him from riding into battle with his army or from fighting and killing a couple of otherworldly Norn-warriors when they attack Naglimund. He even killed the Thrithing-man Utvart in a sword-fight, although Josua was smaller, older, starved and severely beaten up the day before.

Luke, I Am Your Father: Turns out he isn't King Prester John's son; he's Camaris'.

Bond One-Liner: Has one after - against all odds - killing Utvart of the Thrithing-men, who kept mocking Josua throughout the fight by calling him a 'small man' that talks too much. ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎Josua: "Tall man, it is you who talks too much."

The Wise Prince / Badass Bookworm: He'd far rather be studying than leading, and is among the most learned of all the noblemen in the story. In the end, he gives up his crown and joins the League of the Scroll.

The Chains of Commanding: He hates the burden of leadership and would much rather be studying old books.

Modest Royalty: He never dresses in the pomp fitting his station and indeed has to be cajoled into even wearing his crown.

OOC Is Serious Business: When his small party of survivors just barely manages to escape the doom of Naglimund, he beholds the burning stronghold from a hill, raising a hand and exclaiming that he will take the crown from his brother Elias - though against all false allegations he was never interested in power and later only understands it as a means to end the threat posed by Elias'. ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎Josua: "Now you are king no longer! I will take the crown from you. I will take it, I swear!"

Cain and Abel: He plays The Wise Prince to his brother Elias' Hot-Blooded nature, and pays for it by getting picked for a blood sacrifice to the Storm King.

Slap-Slap-Kiss: Josua and his lady Vorzheva have several moments like this.

Used material: “Camaris” is the Artwork Design by Alex Chen, “Cain and Abel” a medieval painting by Orazio Riminaldi. The others come from Pinterest, but give no credit and some of them got lost to me while browsing for pics. If you know any of these pics and have details for the credits, please let me know! Pinterest-sources so far: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 

[babyhikbi]

GENERAL TAROT READING #2: how to deal with your stress

NOTE: I am STILL practicing. Chances of these not resonating with you is high. Hence why I called it a general reading. For entertainment purposes only.

* pick a picture that speaks to you the most (left picture - pile 1, right picture - pile 2, lower left picture - pile 3, lower right picture - pile 4)

* pictures used are all from Pinterest

1ST PILE

I feel like you're stressed because you feel like you have been wronged.

It could be as simple as backstabbing or being denied to be able to speak the truth. Or like, other people get to enjoy certain things and yet you cannot, anything that deals with justice and feeling being treated unfairly. For some reason, I think you wish for justice to be served. I keep on repeating this but I feel like you want karma for those who have wronged you. An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth situation. That, or you just feel like life is being unfair with you and deep inside you, you wish for things to change, to go according to your way, etc.

What makes this stress worse is your indecisiveness. You need to keep on moving forward. You need to forgive or to forget or to let go. Do not mindfully hold on on things because they unconsciously make your situation more unbearable than it already is. Not to mention, the people around you and your current struggles add up to your pain and you have the tendency to hold it all in. Please, let go of this pain.

An advice I can give you to lessen the stress is to have a set to follow, especially with the pandemic, time is like a sand in our hands. Follow a tight schedule or a set of things that you must do on time as much as possible. Distract yourself with a hobby or an activity that needs concentration, and if you're someone religious, mayhaps this is a calling to go to your church or to visit your God.

2ND PILE

I feel like you feel this stress because of your own doing.

You have the tendency to avoid or disregard your pain, a coping mechanism to avoid stress. And I feel like, your problems has stacked up so bad that it is no longer avoidable and that is something you wish to do at this very moment but again, your problems have become so bad that you're forced to face them.

A habit you have that makes your situation worse is self-pitying and overthinking. Almost to the point that you couldn't sleep well because nightmares occur most of the time. You're most probably sleep-deprived and is just really tired emotionally, mentally, and physically.

I know you have a source of your stress but a factor that is almost as bad as your stress is that you cannot hide from the world. Like, I feel like, everyone is just so involved with you at the moment and this suffocates you because you're used to dealing with your problems through avoiding it in a silent way. The way people approach you is stressing you out rather than comforting you.

An advice I can give is simply to face your problems. I know, I shouldn't preach but honestly, I feel like your problem would be more bareable (I'm not invalidating your problem, okay) if you simply accept it. That yes, it's a problem, it needs an immediate solution. I need your help, I need to reach out to people. Somebody help me because I cannot deal with this alone. Just....stop sleeping on your problems.

3RD PILE

Oh, God, love, I hope you're okay ;-;

You're literally not feeling the best right now. Is this a family matter? 'Cause it feels like one.

I get that you're not feeling the best right now. You feel hopeless and powerless. You wish you can relive the times where you were feeling the greatest. The lack of abundance in your life right now makes this extra difficult to deal.

I want you to know that the tendency to leave/ghost/disregard/avoid your problems adds up to your stress, especially that I think most of your problems are inflicted by people around you, you cannot possible avoid everyone.

I don't know why the cards gave me this but an advice I can give to lessen this pain is to disregard your family? No, I'm not saying you abandon or leave them. I'm saying that....hmmmm...try not to listen too much about what the get to say? Or what they want you to do? Because this is your life and body. You get to control what you want to do. Yes, we should be grateful because they're there for you but sometimes, family can just become very toxic so sometimes, it's okay to shut their voices out if it becomes overwhelming for your part.

4TH PILE

It almost feels like a break up to me, LOL.

I feel like you recently left someone? Or the other way around? It does not have to be romantic, though. Maybe you had a fight with someone and they're not contacting you at the moment? I just see a broken relationship in this pile. If it isn't, then I feel like this is also a rift with your family like pile 3.

The messages the cards are giving me is kind of complicated. I feel like you're the passive aggressive type? There are times where you're driven by your emotions and you lack balance in your actions. It's almost as if...when stressed, you let your anger or whatever it is you're feeling control you which is a bad habit.

And you have this constant feeling that people then are being 'unfair' to you because you are being 'unreasonable'. It irks you how they can pass judgement on you and yet they have no clue of your situation? Or like, they only grasp a little of it? Something like that, that's what I'm seeing.

This sounds stupid as it contradicts what I previously said but an advice I can give is to let it flow . I'm saying that you let it all flow out BUT, look for a positive outlet. I'm thinking of an activity that is concentration inducing? And time consuming? Something that'd just kill your anger or pain in the long process because it makes you lose track of time. (I personally suggest crocheting as it helped me at my darkest times)

[wintcrdvst]

𝐃𝐘𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐈𝐂 𝐐𝐔𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐒 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ! under the cut you will find a masterlist of 213 quotes that can be used for otps, brotps and possibly even notps. these were gathered from various sources such as songs and pinterest for personal use, but i figured i might as well share. give a like or reblog if this was useful to you, and enjoy !!

her lips are like the galaxy’s edge

i’d probably still adore you with your hands around my neck

surrounded by the what if’s and the maybe’s

we’ll be the last ones standing

all that’s left is you and me

you are the light at the end of the road

you are my favorite what if

every single moment will be faded into you

still remember a time when you felt like home

i see the love i have and it is all for you

the only heaven i’ll be sent to is when i’m alone with you

i found god‚ i found him in a lover

he’s off to pay his crimes and he’s got no time for mine

oh baby girl you know we’re gonna be legends

you know the two of us are just young gods

i’m a king and you’re a queen and we will stumble through heaven

if you wanna go to heaven you should fuck me tonight

if i am the waves then you must be the moon

temperatures rising‚ i don’t want to feel

been wondering if your heart’s still open and if so i wanna know what time it shuts

open up next to you and my secrets become your truth

i only love it when you touch me‚ not feel me

tell me that you love me even if it’s fake

whatever our souls are made of‚ his and mine are the same

every moment with you sounds like welcome home

you say my name and it comes out like a dark confession

my love for you is the only thing i’m sure of

the devil kissed my neck and it felt like heaven

it’s our paradise and it’s our warzone

this is what happens when a tornado meets a volcano

i’m running in circles watching you call someone else’s name

all i want is the taste that your lips allow

your eyes hold everything my soul thirsts for

every bit of love that i possess within me, all of it, is just for you

of all the things my hands have held the best by far is you

no other word makes my mouth as tender as your name

my heart is so full of you i can hardly call it my own

my soul will find yours

in a room full of art i’d still stare at you

they know you walk like you’re a god‚ they can’t believe i made you weak

i would kill to be the cold tracing your body and shaking your bones

i was a king under your control

perhaps the monsters needed to look out for each other every now and then

he knows me‚ every inch of my tar black soul

souls don’t speak‚ yet ours spoke fluently

you are the only place that feels like home

bite my neck and call me angel

we were fire and water‚ love laced with sin

my demons are in love with yours

you were like death and i was like war‚ and where we collided‚ darling‚ i loved you

i have looked at you in millions of ways and i have loved you in each

you gave me peace in a lifetime of war

if you’re gonna be the death of me that’s how i wanna go

my love‚ you are worth it all

she chased away my demons with the stars in her eyes

his hands on my flesh‚ so gentle yet commanding‚ make me want to sin

there’s a light in the crack that’s separating your thighs

swear to god i’m a sinner in a church burnin’ up for you

we fight every night for something‚ when the sun sets we’re both the same

i gave you everything and it’s a beautiful crime

made it through the maze to find my one in a million

maybe i’ll hold my breath and jump right in

i want to reconcile the violence in your heart

i want to satisfy the undisclosed desires in your heart

you may be a sinner but your innocence is mine

she took my heart‚ i think she took my soul

fucked around and got attached to you

you were sent to me from the skies above

give me love and all your hate

i’ll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife

i dare you to let me be your one and only

you have my heart inside of your hand

with the same damn hunger to be touched‚ to be loved‚ to feel anything at all

please don’t forget me and all the things we did

we sin as devils do‚ we love as angels do

hell is just another place i’ll go to keep you warm

how does it feel with my teeth in your heart

do you know what it means to have death know your name

when i see you‚ it feels like coming home

i want to build you an empire that forgets to collapse

i crave you; even in the darkness‚ even in blood

i loved you long before i had the guts to let you know

i always feel at home with her‚ no matter how far away from home we are

death sits in the seat next to me; we make a lovely couple

with his educated eyes and his head between my thighs

i fell in love with the subject of sin

you come in waves

when hell freezes over

i’ll let you drag me through hell if it means you’ll hold my hand

until the end of the world

i know your heart

you and i and no one else

anytime you need a friend i’m gonna be by your side

how wonderful life is with you in the world

i could be yours

i know you used to love me in every way

i loved and i loved and i lost you and it hurts like hell

i wish you were a ship that was guided by the touch of my lips

the two of us went up in smoke

yours are the sweetest eyes i’ve ever seen

let me love the lonely out of you

falling seems so easy

no matter where you go you know you’re not alone

i’ll always be by your side

your eyes are where i’m lost in

i wanna get lost with you

i loved you then and i love you now

haunted by the ghost of you

if you don’t mind me saying so i love you

as long as you say you’re mine

take away all my sin‚ give me a sweet prayer on my lips

i will follow you into the dark

you’re a king and i’m a lionheart

as the world comes to an end i’ll be here to hold your hand

i find shelter in your arms

put your lips close to mine as long as they don’t touch

i swear i thought i dreamed her

maybe i just wanna be yours

the nights were mainly made for saying things that you can’t say tomorrow day

i want you to want me again

never knew loving could hurt this good

you’re driving me wild

i can be the subject of your dreams

i had fallen in love with you before i knew

like the dawn you broke the dark

when we go crashing down we come back every time

like gods at the dawning of the world

i would know him in death‚ at the end of the world

he is half of my soul like the poets say

i wanna ruin our friendship‚ we should be lovers instead

i don’t wanna be your friend‚ i wanna kiss your neck

your eyes will lead me straight back home

friends shouldn’t kiss me like you do

remember my love for you won’t fade

for your eyes only i will show my heart

just say you won’t let go

i tasted the divine and she left my lips dripping with love

even when the world is against us i’ll keep you warm

my soul will find you each time

thought we built a dynasty that heaven couldn’t shake

i’ll be your escape‚ i’ll be your safe place

she was my salvation‚ i was her destruction

we should just kiss like real people do

the world may disapprove but my world is only you

lend me your hand and we’ll conquer them all

wherever there is you i will be there too

close to you i feel i’m at home

if i die may it be of love and if i love may it be you

if your body was a book i’d read a thousand chapters

i want to love in you and get lost in you only

i want to hide you in my heart and not open it after that

we return to each other in waves

let him be soft and let him be mine

i didn’t know that i was starving until i tasted you

i was with you before we were even born

he was her warmth‚ she was his peace

what a lovely way to burn

if i told you about the darkness inside of me would you still look at me like i’m the sun

kiss me with adventure until i forget my name

as the dust settles around us

maybe we started this fire

touch me only when nobody knows

your love is my poison

i wanna taste the way that you bleed

you are the devil in me

wherever you go you can always come home

you’d be like heaven to touch

you changed everything

you feed this fire and walk away

lately i’ve been craving more

i’ve been cold since you left

make me feel like i am breathing

i’ll fucking digest you one kiss at a time

you wish i was yours and i hope that you’re mine

i met her at church but she could be satan

with one kiss you inspired a fire of devotion

i am the blank page before you

i am the fine idea you crave

don’t know why‚ just know i want you

don’t care why‚ just know i love you

to say that we’re in love is dangerous

i will follow you anywhere

i’d kiss you if it wouldn’t kill me

this isn’t love but it’s more than infatuation

i’m at your will‚ can’t you see what you do to me

if this could kill‚ you can read me my eulogy

three puzzle pieces fit together perfectly

my heart found a home in yours

you make me feel like i am home again

enter a king and a queen

he set fire to the world around him but never let a flame touch her

too busy being yours to fall for somebody new

if love is anything tangible‚ it is his mouth

in the middle of my chaos‚ there was you

all we do is think about the feelings that we hide

he tastes like every dark thought i’ve ever had

heaven is a place on earth with you

i can feel you running through my veins

following my heart will always lead me to you

a sea of rum couldn’t intoxicate me as much as a drop of you

i found the devil‚ i found him in a lover

i hadn’t tasted love until i tasted you

no place like home‚ no place like her

i was made for loving you

there is no sweeter innocence than our gentle sin

if we can’t find heaven i’ll walk through hell with you

i’m drowning in these memories

i found love where it wasn’t supposed to be

fire and ice‚ they go hand in hand

in all chaos there is calculation

two thirds of my soul

us against the world

two heartbeats under me

[oceankisscd]

alexa play you should see me in a crown by billie eilish

[ LINDSEY MORGAN, CIS FEMALE, SHE/HER. ]    introducing nesta montalvo, VICTOR of the 65th hunger games, representing district 5. my sources say that they are twenty seven years old, & that they’re pretty handy with knowledge of electricity & power. wonder if that did them any good in the arena ? anyways, caesar says you can’t miss them, because they remind everyone of the ever present hum of white noise, sun kissed skin littered with scars, harsh words leaving silver tongues, shattered mirrors, & bloody shards of glass.

CHARA INSPO   :   mikasa ackerman  (  aot  ),   johanna mason  (  the hunger games  ),   kirishima touka  (  tokyo ghoul  ),   amren  (  acotar  ),   raven reyes  (  the 100  )

PINTEREST  :   click here !

she   wears    𝖘𝖙𝖗𝖊𝖓𝖌𝖙𝖍   &    𝖉𝖆𝖗𝖐𝖓𝖊𝖘𝖘   equally   well   /   the   girl   has   always   been   𝐡𝐚𝐥𝐟 - 𝐠𝐨𝐝𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐬  ,  𝐡𝐚𝐥𝐟 - 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐥 .

name   :   nesta montalvo

age  :   twenty seven

gender & pronouns   :   cisfemale & she / her

district   :   five

occupation   :   victor of the 65th hunger games.

moral alignment   :   true neutral.

any wanted connections i have are at the end of this !!

greetings , and welcome to the first intro i’ve written in .... a year ? maybe ?? this should be fun !

you were born on the night of the worst storm district five had seen in who knows how long , and during the loudest roll of thunder , you made your appearance. the sounds of your shrieks defended the howling winds , as if you were challenging zeus himself at mere infancy. your parents knew then that you were a force to be reckoned with  --  a storm given skin. they gave you the name nesta ;  a name meaning sacred , and pure. if only they’d seen your fate ahead of time.

you grew up in and out of the powerplants , had hiding spots in the hydrodam , learned the way power was the main source of ... well , everything. you were always good in school , but it wasn’t anything you were interested in. your desires lay towards maintenance work , wanting more than anything to get your hands on those wires. even as a child , the way that the simple connection could cause such a big reaction was one that so deeply mesmerized you. the way electricity and power worked was incredible , and you wanted any and everything to do with it. 

you lived in a bubble of possibility , until you lost your sister to the games. you were fourteen years old , and sylvie was everything to you. your rock , your best friend , your person. and she was reaped , and she was killed three days into the games by the female career from district 2. it completely destroyed you  --  you lost interest in everything , everyone. life became a routine , moving day by day. you had your wires to tinker with , and your parents to have measly conversation with , but nothing was ever the same.

you were eighteen years old when you were reaped. eighteen years old , no longer in school , three weeks away from starting your new job at the plant , and suddenly you had no future. 

you went through the motions , the parade , the interviews , having to deal with the uppity stylists , and suddenly you were in the arena , fighting for your life. it wasn’t until after you’d survived the bloodbath with nothing but a coil of wire and a small backpack that you decided you weren’t going to let your parents lose another daughter. so you fought  -- you fought and you fought and you fought until you’d managed to get your hold on a sword. with your wires , and your new weapon , you were able to figure out a way to win.

and win is exactly what you did.

now , you’re perpetually stuck going through the motions of the capitol , and you hate it. you hate it more than you’ve ever hated anything , and yet you can’t seem to find a way out of this godforsaken loop and you’re just so ready for it to be over , over , over , over. 

it was purposeful , the words you’d prattled during your second time mentoring. announcing that you despised the capitol loud enough that people of importance could hear. it wasn’t two days later that you’d received word from home that your parents both perished in an accident in the power plant. accidents happen all the time , they’d said. we’re very sorry , they’d said. but you knew -- you knew it wasn’t an accident , but it was still enough to numb your system and zip your lips tightly. but that anger ,  that fire , still burned inside.

you want the capitol gone , you want to watch it burn to the ground. for eight years , you’ve had to send people you knew to the slaughter. for eight years , you’ve been stuck in this game that never seems to have an end. for eight long years , you have been nothing but a pawn and you are so , so tired and so , so angry.

and now come the wanted connections ,,,

give her some victor friends. people who understand just how exhausting it is to have to constantly go through the motions , to feel like they are nothing more than just pawns in this never ending game. 

i am a sucker ,,, an absolute SUCKER ,,, for will they / won’t they’s. do with that what you will.

a half sibling mayhaps ???  someone for her 2 actually still care about and keep her mouth shut so the capitol doesn’t go banana balls on her

REBELLION CONTACTSSSSSSSSSSSSSS GIVE HER INFO LET HER FIGHT !!!

i know i mentioned will they / won’t they’s already but truly ,,, this girl is terrified to let herself love anyone because she is worried that anyone she loves will die the way her parents did. give me this please i love the angst of it all.

[intomyarmsmp3]

Top List of Things Small Businesses Should Be Doing

Yes, this is Just Another list of things small businesses should (or should Not ) Do but they are (or are Not ) I know, I know, you can not wait to read still another list detailing what you should do or worse, what you are doing wrong. Please, place your cynicism aside for a minute and leave the sarcasm to me. 

I am not in the fear-mongering business. I am also not at the magic-button business. The fear-mongering business uses scare tactics to inform you about all the things you are doing but should not be doing because if you do them, you are likely killing adorable puppies and kittens.

I have read my fair share of these and some really scared me to the purpose of second guessing daily choice. I'm confident you've read a number of these also. Did they work? Did those fear-mongering posts allow you to take some action? Buy a service or product? It is OK if it worked. It will not make you gullible, or more gullible anyway. 

It is used a lot in marketing and promotion since it works. As psychologists, physicians and advertisers have known for quite a very long time, anxiety is a significant motivator to buy. Fear of the unknown or unpredictable (insurance), fear of being dull (style, automobile, beauty), fear of missing out (think of anything that uses scarcity as a strategy - Only 10 left!). 

Hell, even the fear of fear is promoted by large pharma. Then there is the magic-button business. This thing I'm going to sell for you will change your whole business, your whole life, even your wardrobe and just takes one click. Yeah, this type of marketing sucks and is a low blow, not only to our sensibilities but also to our own delicate marketing egos.

This marketing works because it generally uses fear-mongering and then sweeps in to save the day with the magic-button solution. Some of us are swayed by this not because of fear but because they do not need to set the blood, sweat, and tears into creating a brand or business the same way you have. They need a magic solution. 

By this point you may be asking yourself,"Do you truly have a list or was it just some cleverly worded headline to get readers?" The following list is truly about what the headline says so, the headline composed itself and is not that clever. I attempt to present these topics with no fear-mongering and minus the magic-button technique. I only need to present facts that may (or may not be) related to developing your business. 

1. Know the Benefits of On Page & Off Page Search Engine Optimization (Search Engine Optimization ) There is so much information regarding SEO that it seems like anyone that has read a few books or articles on Search Engine Land is giving you information about SEO. Like with most items that incorporate plenty of knowledge from many diverse sources, there is a great deal of out-of-date information, rumors and myths about proper SEO. I want you to have details: 

* Optimizing the pages of your site for keywords is a factor in ranking in search engine results pages (SERPS) however, it is not the only element. 

* Loading time of your site pages is a factor in rank in SERPS 

* Well written content of a specific length is a factor in position in SERPS 

* There are many factors and variables that make ranking each page unique however, overall there are common rules that can be implemented 

* Bounce Rate (how long people stay on your website ) is a factor in rank in SERPS 

* Optimizing content across the Net that is not on your Website is called Off Page SEO and will help you rank and create traffic 

* There is a lot to understand and test and you've got better things to do. This is the reason it's a fantastic idea to hire someone that does SEO for a living. 

2. Have a Responsive Website You might have seen this expression when constructing your site or when somebody like me approaches one to inform you your website isn't responsive. This simply means mobile friendly. To put it differently, your website will"respond" or adjust to being shown on a larger screen like a desktopcomputer, a smaller display like a tabletcomputer, or a even smaller screen like a smartphone without getting cut off or not loading pictures etc.. Here are a few more facts: 

* It is estimated that by 2020, only 4 years from now, the use of smartphones in America alone will increase by 6 million 

* Over 90 percent of individuals with smartphones use them to hunt and research online before making a purchase

* While many purchases are still made in shop, the tendency for online purchases continues to grow 

* Without using fear-mongering approaches I think you can clearly see that, with the increase in smartphone use and online shopping, it is critically important to make sure your website is responsive- (mobile friendly).

3. Social Media Management I've seen a great deal of small businesses with Facebook webpages, Twitter accounts, Pinterest boards, LinkedIn accounts, Instagram accounts and so forth. This is Wonderful! Except, most small businesses must believe that by simply having the accounts they have done their part. 

So a number of these accounts are such as the Sahara. Dry, nothing actually living there and nobody wants to visit. I did a spot check of several regional businesses and found that a tax business with hardly any social media property. Facebook page? 

CHECK! Last update? Uh... February? Twitter account? Apparently there's a Twitter account since it's on the site, but clicking on the link only takes you to Twitter, not their personal page. A few popular restaurants in the region suffer from precisely the identical issue. Posts are extremely spread out with 3-6 articles a month (at a fantastic month)! More details for you to digest:  

"But Jason, how does that affect me anyplace? There are not that many people in my city." I am glad you asked...

 * 75 percent of people using the internet in your city are using social media

* There are optimal times and days to post to Facebook to reach the most people 

* You will find optimal times and days to post to Twitter to reach the maximum people-and they are different than the times and days for Facebook 

* In fact, each social networking platform has certain times and days that see the most engagement 

* According to elaborate charts, you should be posting to Facebook a few times every DAY, and Tweeting 4-15 times per DAY! 

4. Manage Your Online Reputation There are a lot of stories about people taking to social media to share their love or hate for a provider. Unfortunately, the stories the majority of us recall are the ones that are bad.

The folks expressing their loathing with artistic flair are not necessarily a client or customer. Sometimes they happen to be a worker. Such as the poor sap working for an advertising agency that was hired by General Motors. He had been driving to a meeting at General Motors in Detroit when he chose to converse about the irony of the motor city with terrible traffic. 

Oh, he also used an F* Bomb. Obviously, General Motors watched the tweet, fired the agency and the poor sap was summarily fired also. But, I see a great deal of businesses that don't know whether they are being cited online unless it occurred in their Facebook page. 

[theanxiousgeekmom]

Hello, Sweetie 💋

Day one on Tumblr. I've spent years on Pinterest pinning Tumblr screenshots, so I thought it was time to go straight to the source. Give me your best tips for newbies in the comments please.

Who am I exactly? Still figuring that out. How to define myself, that is. In short? Coordinated chaos. I should have picked that for my username, I mean that was some serious pressure, even though I can change it later. Whoops, that's probably just my anxiety. I'm the kind of girl who saves perfume samples for a special enough occasion and gets stressed out by adult coloring books because what if I color it wrong and I want to change it later, but I can't. Anxiety, depression, PTSD..my brain is a mental health grab bag. Ah, the PTSD. You have questions. Or maybe you don't care (shut up depression, go back to your corner).

I'll spare you the long-winded explanation (for now), but I was in an abusive marriage for four agonizing years. In the third year, my mother killed herself. I was the last person she talked to. The fourth year, I escaped my marriage and got a protective order against him. Three weeks later, I found my father dead (heads up for possible trigger) hanging from a rope when I went to drop my kids off. I was the last one to talk to him. They didn't see, thank goodness. So to say it has been a rough few years is putting it mildly.

MOVING ON. I don't talk about it carelessly, like it means nothing to me, or for attention. However I have to find a balance between healing, grief and trying to be open enough about it to maybe be able to help others somehow.

SO. A year and a half later.

I now have a marvelous relationship with an incredible man, my kids are thriving, I'm coparenting with the ex and his pregnant girlfriend (still have the protective order), almost done with my divorce (March 2nd!), succeeding at work, mending friendships and resuming all the things I lost during the marriage. Such as...

I'm back to writing! I'm on Upwork, filling notebooks with vague ideas, typing typing typing on my laptop and now here I am on Tumblr.

I'm back to baking! I bake a treat every week, got my baking tools replenished for Christmas and I'm halfway to carpal tunnel because I missed piping on cakes SO MUCH.

I am more outgoing than I have ever been, everyone jokes that I never shut up but the little things don't get to me anymore because after all I went though, none of the petty stuff is even on my radar. My anxiety still gets me, makes me overreact and pay more attention than is neccessary, but I'm managing it pretty well at the moment.

Speaking of talking forever, I'm rambling. You probably don't need to know all this abo-DEPRESSION GO BACK TO YOUR CORNER SO HELP ME. Sorry you had to see that.

I'll wrap up with this one last line. *deep breath* harrypotterbatmandoctorwhosherlockyouedgarallenpoedexterhungergamesstoryscapetitanicharleyquinnarrowflashriverdalestarwarsPRINCESSBRIDE!

Have fun storming the castle!

[applesdrowned-a]

NAME : estelle  NICKNAME :   es.  FACECLAIM :  i don’t have one currently. so i just use my zq icons. i used to use anne hathaway & stitch tho. might start using stitch again if i can’t find something suitable.  PRONOUNS :  they/them  HEIGHT :  5′2 1/2  BIRTHDAY :   august 25th AESTHETIC : messy hair, camouflage, mismatched socks, dusk,  plaid, cool colours  LAST  SONG  YOU  LISTENED  TO : killing boys , halsey  FAVOURITE  MUSE (S)  YOU’VE  WRITTEN : rumplestiltskin, spock, sylar, han solo & ofc chad !  

GETTING  TO  KNOW  THE  ACCOUNT :

WHAT  INSPIRED  YOU  TO  TAKE  ON  THIS  MUSE :  ummm well, i needed more zach content so i took the plunge and watched ahs. i actually watched asylum first cos i heard more about that role, but anywho... i watched murder house & immediately fell in love with chad.  i didn’t see a point in making a blog cause i didn’t know if their was a murder house community. i added him to my multi muse eventually shifting to a sideblog there & then one day bam murder house people started to show.  so i took the plunge & made a full blog. best fucking decision i ever made. i haven’t had this much fun writing muse in a long time. 

WHAT  ARE  YOUR  FAVOURITE  ASPECTS  OF  YOUR  CURRENT  MUSE : theres a lot i love about him ( granted i had to make it up cause ryan gave us nothing lmfao )  but  i will have to say how much love he has to give. it breaks my heart on the daily. which ties in to how badly he wanted to be a dad & didn’t get the chance & i am sad about it. he just loves children. 

WHAT’S  YOUR  BIGGEST  INSPIRATION  WHEN  IT  COMES  TO  WRITING : music really helps ! i pull verses outta my ass daily with that. pinterest is the quickest way to get me hype for a muse too. chads source material never fails to give me muse. so me watching murder house  ? 101/10 the vibes come in. 

FAVOURITE  TYPES  OF  THREADS : angst. i ain’t gonna lie. i love the drama & the sad shit. but i do love cute stuff ( & you would be surprised how much i can get outta this guy, hes a huge softie )   it does also depend on my mood too. sometimes i want angst sometimes i am in the mood for happy. i do enjoy writing nsfw when i am in the mood for it. 

BIGGEST  STRUGGLE  IN  REGARDS  TO  YOUR  CURRENT  MUSE :  i would love more ahs canons to write with ! there is abundance of violets  & a few tates ? but i wanna see more of the others like,,,,,, ben, vivien, addie, oh and travis,  moira, nora  etc.   write the dead breakfast club,,,, & idk but it would be interesting to ever write with a patrick if we could agree on things.  more  murder house muses please & thank you. 

tagged by: stole it from @jedishope tagging: whomever ! 

[vengeher]

⛧ #ⱽᴱᴺᴳᴱᴴᴱᴿ. a horror based 𝐒𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐇 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐂𝐋𝐈𝐅𝐅 of alex kister's 𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝙼𝙰𝙽𝙳𝙴𝙻𝙰 𝙲𝙰𝚃𝙰𝙻𝙾𝙶𝚄𝙴 , written as a semi original character , investigated by ₛₕᵢₗₒₕ [ she/xe , est , 18+ ] 𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋 𝐁𝐋𝐎𝐆𝐒 𝐃𝐎 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓.

STUDYING IN: “ he's more 𝗺𝘆𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳 than 𝗶 𝗮𝗺 . whatever our souls are made of , ʰⁱˢ ᵃⁿᵈ ᵐⁱⁿᵉ ᵃʳᵉ ᵗʰᵉ ˢᵃᵐᵉ . IF ALL ELSE PERISHED , and H̲E̲ R̲E̲M̲A̲I̲N̲E̲D̲, i should still CONTINUE TO BE ; and if all else remained , and he were annihilated , ᵗʰᵉ ᵘⁿⁱᵛᵉʳˢᵉ ʷᵒᵘˡᵈ ᵗᵘʳⁿ ᵗᵒ ᵃ ᵐⁱᵍʰᵗʸ ˢᵗʳᵃⁿᵍᵉʳ . ”

¹ information (tba) . ² pinterest . ³ starter call .

₁. [ FOLLOWING . ] : my blog is private and slow activity and because of my habitual slowness with replies i am selective with who i decide to write with . as much as i'd love to jump at the chance to write with everyone i am a very easily stressed out individual . i don't want my threads to pile up to the point it just isn't fun for me anymore . no hard feelings !

₂. [ ETIQUETTE . ] : if we are writing together i ask that you have the decency to practice proper roleplay etiquette . please do not control my character or force anything upon my character ( within reason ) without clarification . i will not roleplay any rape , incest , pedophilia , sexual assault or outright suicide . if you don't respect these terms you will be hardblocked .

₃. [ PLOTTING . ] : i absolutely love plotting . i'd love it if you would message me if interested in that sort of thing . if plotting isn't your vibe , thats completely fine ! im also open to having have casual conversations about our muses and their relationship ect ! most of sarah's interactions take place post mark's death . i will occasionally write pre mark death sarah . those are typically special cases and i will clarify beforehand . if you have something else in mind please let me know ! i'm open to just about anything !

₄. [ THREADS . ] : i do my best to keep track of my ongoing threads but i am very forgetful by nature ! i might need a little reminder because god knows i won't get to it until you hound me a bit ! just give me some time after your first reminder . if you are constantly on me about it will completely kill my motivation . one or two reminders are fine but any more than that is a hard no ! thank you !

₅. [ FORMATTING . ] : for formatting i use icons , small text and triple spacing . i also use fancy fonts occasionally . if you need me to accommodate for you and change this please reach out ! i would be happy to do so !

₆. [ MAINS AND EXCLUSIVES . ] : regarding mains and exclusives i am selective with choosing who i consider mains and exclusives . the criteria being that we are friends , are comfortable with eachother , and talk on a regular basis ! mains provide me with a source of comfort , away from the anxiety i would typically have with writing with someone new ! i take 1-2 mains of the same character and 1 character each with exclusives ! this is for my own comfort and eases my anxiety ! thank you !

₇. [ WARNINGS . ] : triggering content will be present on this blog , this includes but not limited to : religion , violence , blood , referenced / implied suicide , mental illness and death .

₈. [ CREDITS . ] : the psds i use are by jaynedits other graphics are by poohsources the art belongs to antarctite and everything is by yours truly.

[bakwoodzman-blog]

The Rise of Mass Knife Attacks Around the World Shows the Problem Isn’t Guns. It’s People.

                                               May 31, 2018                                

by Daisy Luther

In China, where firearms are tightly restricted, it’s probably no surprise that those who want to hurt people found another way to do it. The dramatic rise of knife attacks around the world shows that the problem these days isn’t with guns. It’s with people.

Mass knife attacks have become so common over the years that a Chinese police department recently released a video to teach citizens how to defend themselves against knife-wielding assailants and it has gone viral, with 16 million views in just a few days. It has subtitles and some great advice that even I would be able to follow.

All humor aside, some folks in the US who want to do away with the Second Amendment are probably saying smugly, “Well, knife attacks are bad, but only people with GUNS can kill dozens of victims quickly.”

Those folks would be wrong.

For example…

In 2014, 33 people were killed and 130 more were injured when a group of men coordinated a terror attack using knives at a train station in southwest China’s Yunnan Province.

In 2015, fifty workers at a Chinese coal mine were killed in a coordinated knife attack. Fifty more workers were injured.

In 2016, a facility for the disabled was attacked by a man with a knife. He killed 15 people and injured 45, then later surrendered himself to police.

In 2017, 18 people walking down a city street were injured when a man attacked them with a knife

13 people were seriously injured by a knife-wielding assailant at a shopping mall in Beijing earlier this year. One woman died from her injuries.

This tells me that it isn’t really a problem with guns. It’s a problem with people.

Instead of school shootings, they have school knifings.

While in the United States, school shootings have become shockingly commonplace, what many don’t know is that in China, where gun control is strict, school knife attacks are a frequent threat. On the very same day as the Sandy Hook shooting in the United States, a man with a knife injured 22 children and one adult at a school in Chenpeng village in the southern province of Guangxi.

Knife attacks at schools in China are common. Last year, a man climbed over the wall of a kindergarten and attacked 11 students. None suffered life-threatening injuries.

In 2016, a man in the southern province of Hainan stabbed 10 children before killing himself, authorities said. And another man killed three students at a school in 2014 before jumping off a building.

Perhaps the worst spate of stabbings occurred in 2010 when attackers targeted schools on three consecutive days. (source)

Just last month, a man wielding a knife killed 9 children and injured 10 others outside a middle school where he says he was bullied.

This isn’t just a problem in China

There have been mass knife attacks all over the world.

In the UK, there has been a deadly knife attack every third day of 2018. In 2017, Met Police recorded 37,443 recorded knife offenses and 6,694 gun offenses. The problem is so bad that a judge has suggested banning the sale of large kitchen knives and that those who already have kitchen knives should file them down to avoid stabbings.

In 2016, two soldiers were attacked by a man with a knife in Belgium, and a few days ago, a prison inmate on day leave stabbed two police officers then took their guns and shot them.

Four people were injured and one was killed when a knife-wielding assailant attacked them in Paris last week.

These are just a few examples and I haven’t dug any further than the first page of Google. I could go on and on, but I think you get the point.

What happens if you take away guns

In each of these cases, something different was blamed.

Some of the attackers were shouting “Allahu Akbar” as they stabbed their victims.

Some of the attackers cited crippling stress.

Some of the attackers said they were bullied or mistreated.

Some of the attackers were mentally ill and had a history of psychological problems.

Some of the attackers had religious and ethnic differences from their victims.

One attacker just didn’t like disabled people.

You can’t fix people who want to harm others for their various reasons by taking away guns. You can only make it harder for the rest of us to defend ourselves against them.

Take away guns, and you get knives. Take away knives and you get improvised explosives. There is no way to take away the yen that some people have to kill others.

And if I am involved in a knife-fight, well, personally, I’d rather take a gun.

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About the Author

Daisy Luther

Please feel free to share any information from this site in part or in full, leaving all links intact, giving credit to the author and including a link to this website and the following bio. Daisy is a coffee-swigging, gun-toting, homeschooling blogger who writes about current events, preparedness, frugality, and the pursuit of liberty on her website, The Organic Prepper. Daisy is the publisher of The Cheapskate's Guide to the Galaxy, a monthly frugality newsletter, and she curates all the most important news links on her aggregate site, PreppersDailyNews.com. She is the best-selling author of 4 books and lives in the mountains of Virginia with her two daughters and an ever-growing menagerie. You can find Daisy on Facebook, Pinterest, and Twitter.

[so-caffeinated]

Okay, SO... I think this is probably the best way to reply to my spoilery asks. Responses are below the cut. There are spoilers for all currently posted chapters including the unscheduled one posted today. 

There will also be some minor spoilers in answers for future chapters. 

Sound good? Here we go!

###TEMPEST SPOILERS BELOW### 

(1) Hi!! Long time lurker, first time commenter and I just have to say how much I love your stories!! Two guesses on the Jules/husband spoiler. 1) You mentioned the fact that Jules' husband is good at dancing, and an anon asked if she and her husband met through dancing. You replied no, which makes me lean towards Alex being her husband since Jules and Jackson's first meeting is when he's photographing her while she's dancing

(2) Also in the same ask, you talked about Jules dancing by herself at a BBQ to get her husband's attention, which is something I can picture happening at a Will's house with the other firemen. 2) You said in response to a different ask that Jules is a better cook than the other kids because she bonds with her mother-in-law over it. You also characterized their relationship as having the "potential to be very rocky."

(3) Because Alex's dad died in the Undertaking, I feel like Jules' status as a Queen could potentially make for an awkward conversation at Thanksgiving. :) Hope these make sense!! Thank you for sharing your work and characters with us!!!

FFS, Anon. You should have seen my eyes bug out when I read these. Wow. You’re awfully close to spot-on here. The ‘Jules dancing by herself at a BBQ to get her husband’s attention which is something I can picture happening at Will’s house with the other firemen’ is ABSURD. It’s Alex’s house, not Will’s, but otherwise... basically, yeah. Chapter after next, Anon. Chapter after next... and WHEW, it’s a scene. 

She will - though not during Tempest - bond with her mother-in-law largely over cooking. When Jules is committed, she gives her whole self and her whole heart. By the time she falls in love with Alex, she loves all of him. That means his heritage and culture, too. So she learns Spanish and she tries more Mexican foods and she learns to cook some of it, amongst other things. That said... winning over Mama Castillo is not gonna be easy. She liked Alex’s on-again/off-again ex-girlfriend. And... Jules is ten years younger than Alex, she’s not Catholic, she’s not Mexican-American, and she’s a Queen. Alex is her only child and Jules is far from the woman she’d pictured for her little boy. 

So I think I know who Jules husband might be. I previous asks you said that if her husband hadn't met Jules, in the other timeline, he would probably have had a daughter with his on again off again girlfriend and I think you said before that Alex(?) had an on again off again girlfriend ( or it was in a chapter)? So I think her husband is Alex.

This is one of those types of spoilers that I forget that I’ve said, but yes. In the other universe he’d have had a daughter with Marisol, his on-again/off-again ex-girlfriend. Having a baby fixes nothing in a relationship, though, and they would have ultimately ended things for good. But Alex never finds something in that universe like what he has with Jules here. There’s nothing even close. Excellent catch, Anon.

I know you can’t respond to this yet but OMG JACKSON NOO POOR JULES IM CRYING IT WAS SO GOOOOOD

ANON! Thank you. Also? I wrote that scene on my birthday. It’d been in my head forever, so it was good to finally get it out, but oh lord... it wasn’t easy. I love Jackson. I really, really do. Killing him was rough. 

I am at work reading Tempest and OH MY GOD! This is AMAZING. Your writing is just incredible. I mean, it always has been but this is just beyond. That death. I wasn't expecting it and I had no idea I was so attached to that character! I'm sobbing! And I was already invested in Jules but now I feel 10x more invested in her and her story. I'm so excited to see where all this goes. THANK YOU! This is truly a gift.

Thank you, Anon! That death scene is one of the few things I’ve written that felt like they came out exactly as I pictured. And it’s been in my head a long time. I’m so, so glad you’re invested in this story because it’s entirely hijacked my life. It well and truly has. And being able to share it with people who appreciate it genuinely means the world. 

Omg I love tempest. I was majorly shocked with Jacksons death though ...you definitely made me tear up being the amazing writer you are. Can you confirm that it's Alex now as her husband ? I don't know how I will survive waiting till next week!!!!!

Clearly, I couldn’t wait til next week either. THANK YOU! And yes, yes I can confirm now that Alex is her eventual husband. Julex rises, my friend!

Ok did Jackson fake his own death to protect her please say yes is he Sentinel and they will find each other again cause I’m just really heartbroken I know it’s for a reason but I really loved Jackson like a lot and now I’m so sad but thanks for the story I kind of wanted the whole thing out so I could read it all I know that’s a bit selfish but when I read I can’t put it down .

Oh, Anon... He did not. I’m sorry. I love Jackson a lot, too, and killing him was hard, but it was absolutely necessary. I wouldn’t have done it otherwise. I’m glad you’re enjoying the story! I can understand wanting to read it all at once. You can, eventually? If that’s an consolation? But I’m glad you’re loving it even weekly (or slightly more than weekly when I get impulsive).

I just read the prologue and the first chapter and if you want me I’ll be sitting in the corner crying my heart out. literal tears are pouring out of my eyes. This is gonna be so painful. and when he calls her Julie I feel my heart breaking into pieces WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO ME JANIS? I DIDNOT ASK FOR THESE EMOTIONS!!!

I am mean and horrible and honestly how do you not know that by now? Sorry. I’m kidding. Maybe I shouldn’t be. SO... is it painful? Yes. But more than that it’s hopeful. At it’s core, this is a story about learning to live with loss instead of just surviving it. I think there’s a lot of joy and optimism in it, too. And I’m pretty sure you’ll agree with me there in time. There are ups and downs, progression and regression... Coping with something like this, getting to a place where you’re more than just okay, isn’t the kind of thing that happens in a straight line. But how Jules learns and copes and changes her viewpoint is really the heart of the story. And there are a lot of emotions ahead. Buy wine, chocolate and tissues. 

OH MY GOD JANIS!!! You're killing me today! First with your amazing new story and then I went to your pinterest page and... Sylvia Castillo??? I'm dead now!!!

You were the first one to catch this, Anon! The Pinterest page has undergone more changes since you sent me this, too. But... YES... Sylvia Castillo. Genuinely one of the sweetest children to ever exist fictionally or otherwise. 

Yay!!! I knew hubby was Alex!!!!! So happy to be right! Love this story so much. Jules is my fave

Thank you, Anon! I’m happy you’re right, too, because Julex is my ship. (Okay I have lots of ships, but Julex is... whew). Glad you’re enjoying it, Anon. Thank you!

Alex marries Jules omg I knew it I had a sliver of hope for my bud Jackson but then you know he’s dead and all break my heart a little bit but at least Alex’s is cool are we at the point where you can confirm this lol cause Pinterest just gave stuff away so you know just wondering please say yes;)

LOL, yes, anon, I will confirm. And thank you! I do adore Jackson (and hey there are infinite universes so he’s out there... somewhere... right?), but it’s Julex for me. Alex is an awesome guy and I can’t wait for you guys to see more of him. I love him like crazy. And you guys are way more active on my Pinterest page than I’d realized!

I love Tempest so far and I'm excited to read more about Jules' journey ! Your writing makes me look forward to Monday mornings and starting the week ( even though some chapters are more heart breaking than others lol) Poor Jackson and Jules, I thought that they might break up because of Jules keeping team Arrow a secret but I didn't want to believe that Jackson would die because he was so sweet and made Jules happy. I'm excited to read more about Jules, thank you for writing ! <3

Thank you, Anon! Jackson was sweet and he did make Jules happy. He would never have left her... not for anything, really. He loved her so much. You will get to see some of that still, even though he’s gone. Both through Jules and other sources. But her journey is mostly about learning to live with having lost him and how to cope with that in a better way. There is a lot of heartbreak in this story, but I also think there’s a lot of love and joy, too. For sure, we are not done with the tears. But we’ve barely scratched the surface on the good stuff. Promise. ;-)

After Jackson's death (soonish after and later on) does Jules have any sort of relationship with Jackson's family( mom, dad, sister) since you said they liked Jules ? Or would it have been too painful for all of them ? Would they have visited Jackson's dog ?

This is a great question. I actually had originally planned a scene between Jules and Jackson’s mom but never wound up writing it. They were both going to be visiting his grave. Jules does still keep in touch with them. They don’t live locally or anything, but she and Bokeh are a connection to Jackson still. I think more than anything else, she and Jackson’s mom and sister e-mail each other. She probably sends them invitations to the occasional art exhibit or whatnot. They aren’t fantastically close, but there’s still affection and a link between them.

 You probably can't answer this (yet?) because it's too spoilery but with Jules eventual husband ... does their relationship start the traditional way (asked out on dates, she tells family/friends etc) or is it more of a secret/affair that they try to hide for a while? (I ask this because my theory is Alex is her husband and as one of Will's friends/coworkers, and Jules currently only looking for sex and not emotions, things start more hidden, if that makes sense)

You’re close, Anon. I’m gonna say you’re half right. Watch for the fifth full chapter (after the prologue so AO3 will call it chapter 6). You’ll get this fully answered there. 

OMG!!!! IT'S ALEX!!! I WAS RIGHT!!!! I AM SO HAPPY!!! I have been firm in this suspicion ever since the ameliam babysitting sylvia chapter! I completely missed the name hint and I speak Spanish and Castillo is the last name of some of my extended family lol. Anyways this is awesome!!! Now I'm curious about Will's reaction to his friend dating his little sister.

Thank you!!! Will’s reaction... is something that probably depends on what exactly he knows and how he knows it, don’t you think? You’ll get to see that... though it’s a bit further down the line.

sooo, is working with two of his siblings-in-law ever weird for Will, or... ? --- (I know you can't talk about that, I just can't wait until you finally can!!!)

You’re assuming some things about Ellie and Sara here, Anon! But with Will and Alex, once Jules and Alex are really firmly together and later married, I think it takes a lot of adjusting. For one thing, they can’t have quite the same conversations they did before, can they? Alex is not discussing his love life with Will anymore, you know? But they trust and love each other as family as it is. They’ve had each other’s backs for a very long time. And that’s not something that’s going to change. 

OH MY WORD. OH MY WORD. WE'RE ONLY TWO CHAPTERS IN & WORDS CANNOT ACCURATELY EXPRESS MY LOVE OF THIS STORY. ALSO I AM BEYOND UPSET THAT I DIDNT NOTICE THAT CONNECTION. A Castle for a Queen....I'M SOBBING. I've had a theory for a long time that Jackson would die, Will would be severely injured in a fire, & Jules would meet Alex as Will is being loaded into the ambulance/taken into surgery. You said a while back that when Jules & Alex meet something else is demanding her attention so... ;).

NO ONE caught that I was giving a Queen a Castle. NO ONE. Not even people who knew who she wound up with. I pat myself on the back a lot. I felt very JKR-like for that. You got awfully close with your theory there, Anon! Very, very close. Great guess!

Hi so I'd planned on my next message being far more eloquent but NOPE SORRY I HAVE ZERO CHILL IM SHRIEKING OH MY WORD. THIS CHAPTER WAS INCREDIBLE. ALL THE HEART EYES 😍😍😍😍😍😍😉😍😍AND AMELIAM. OMW AMELIA. AND THE PREGNANCY SCARE. AND ELARA. ALSO ITS HAPPENING. CHAPTER FOUR. THE BBQ. JULES DANCING. ALEX COMBUSTING. I HAVE LESS THAN ZERO CHILL. AND HIS "JULIANNA." I LOVE THAT HES THE ONLY ONE THAT CALLS HER THAT. I SHIP IT LIKE FREAKING FED-EX. 🏰♥️👸🏻

I love this so much? LOL. Ameliam... Yeah... my ‘damn it Amelia’ tag is earned. You’ll find out more about that later. Also about the pregnancy scare. Chapter four is actually more plotty than anything else, but chapter five is the BBQ and chapter six is... you’ll like chapter six. Alex always calls her Julianna. Never Jules or Julie or anything else except some nicknames.... which you’ll get to in a bit. He has a few. I AM SO GLAD YOU SHIP IT! I love Julex so much! Thank you!

Oh man I know Tempest is going to be soooo good! Today's chapter has to be one of my favorites with everything going on! Finally Jules and Alex are in the open and I adore them so much and am so excited to see more from them. Also ever since I first found out about them I have been wanting to see Will's reaction to it and if it is anything like with Javi it is going to be very interesting and really entertaining to see. Also wow, Amelia did get married and Will thought he was going to be a dad😱

Thank you! I loved this chapter. And Julex... oh Julex... they have so much more to see. I am beyond excited to share more! You’ll get Will’s reaction, too, but that’s a bit further on in the story. Amelia... did get married. She did. Not the best choice she ever made, let’s leave it at that for now. Will - very briefly - did think he might be going to be a dad. I think his own reaction to that surprised him, especially given the circumstances, and I reeeeeeeeeeeally wanna write that. Like right now. It’s a Big Moment with some major parallels. 

OH. MY. GOD! THANK YOU for posting Chapter 3 early. I'm SO obsessed with this story! Questions because of course ... How old is Alex? At this point in the story, does Sara know how Ellie feels about her? Without getting too spoilery, does Sara know how she feels about Ellie at this point (platonic or otherwise)? Also ... Amelia got married????!!!!

Alex is 34 and Jules is 24 in this story. She’s not-quite-ten-years younger than him. Sara does know how Ellie feels about her and Sara also knows how she feels about Ellie. It’s not exactly as simple as that, though. Which you’ll get to later. And Amelia did get married and I AM SORRY but she did. She did. It wasn’t her best choice ever, but there we go. There will be more on that later, but not in Tempest. Thank you!!

FiCoN just keeps getting better and better and I'm really looking forward to everything that is left! P.S. I think it really is a testament to your writing ability how even though I already knew Alex was Jules husband and was really excited for that relationship and we only met Jackson a few times, I felt gutted by his death. I know there is so much more story to tell with everyone's lives and I absolutely can't wait to read everything you have to share!

Thank you! Getting better is absolutely the ultimate goal. I always want to be better than my last story and Tempest feels like a big step forward to me. I’m glad it still impacted you even knowing about both Alex and Jackson. That means a ton! And there is so much story left to tell. If I stepped back and looked at it all at once, it might be daunting. lol

THANK YOU FOR THE EARLY CHAPTER!!! OMG Jules and Alex are HOT!!! They are even better than I imagined!!! Honestly I probably looked like a crazy person while reading with all the smiling and squealing i was doing. And that Amelia reveal!! I always feared that would happen. Poor Will but I'm excited to eventually see what happens there. Also super curious about the QI girl. Anyways Julex is amazing I am officially in love w/ them!!!

Thank you! Jules and Alex are... possibly the steamiest stuff I’ve written yet. They smolder. Their sex scenes are insane. And when @dust2dust34 edits them they’re a million times better. She’s gotten through two so far and it’s absolutely bonkers how hot they are oh my god. With Amelia... yeah... so there’ll be more on that later. Also about Will because I’m dying to write about him and ‘the girl from QI’ so much oh my god. It’s gonna be a great scene. SHIP JULEX! Definitely ship Julex. Julex is OTP. <3

[ravingirls]

Ravin' Girls Episode 6: Midnight Magic by Ravin' Girls: A Raven Cycle Podcast

Episode Summary:

Welcome to Episode 6, where we cover Chapters 16-18 of The Raven Boys!

I think someone slipped us the giggle juice this time around! We lose our collective minds about the subject of Paul Bunyan’s beard, debate whether baby birds are cute or ugly, give some solid advice on what to do if something tells you it can “smell you” (hint: RUN!), and Shannon makes what might be the nerdiest joke this podcast has ever seen. And that’s saying a lot.

DEEP DIVE: Scrying

MINI-DEEP DIVE on the difference between psychics and witches

Subscribe at: https://ravingirls.podiant.co or wherever you get your podcasts, and please comment, rate, or review!

- - - - -

Next Episodes:

2/1/18-- Ravin' Girls Episode 7, covering chapters 19-22 of TRB 2/15/18-- Ravin’ Girls Episode 8, covering chapters 23-24 of TRB

Past Episode Guide: https://ravingirls.tumblr.com/episodes

Follow Us:

Twitter: https://twitter.com/ravingirls

Tumblr: https://ravingirls.tumblr.com

Facebook: https://facebook.com/ravingirls

WordPress: https://ravingirls.wordpress.com

- - - - -

Links to Articles, Websites, and Other Discussions:

Maggie talks about reading memoirs about bird rehab for details on how to raise Chainsaw: http://ravenboys.tumblr.com/post/34241110284/maggie-stiefvater-answers-questions-about-raven

Maggie learning the Irish Pipes: https://youtu.be/Y4GNc4CAi2I

Maggie playing the pipes during the All The Crooked Saints tour: https://www.instagram.com/p/Bbxx_FfhNBD/

Baby ravens are not all that cute: http://coyot.es/thecorvidblog/2013/10/13/i-am-not-a-baby-crow/

D & D spell info: https://roll20.net/compendium/dnd5e/Scrying#content

Basic definition: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scrying

The Art and History of Scrying: https://associationofparanormalstudy.wordpress.com/2013/11/14/mirror-mirror-on-the-wall-the-art-and-history-of-scrying/

Sounds sorta like what Neeve did. https://lonerwolf.com/scrying/

John Dee: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Dee

Jeane Dixon: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jeane_Dixon

More on Jeane Dixon: http://skepdic.com/dixon.html

The Bloody Mary game is kinda like scrying https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bloody_Mary_(folklore)

Possible physical explanation for scrying visions https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Troxler%27s_fading

Dresden Files Soulgaze http://dresdenfiles.wikia.com/wiki/Soulgaze

Wikipedia page on Pareidolia: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pareidolia

Definition of Pareidolia: https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/pareidolia

Labradorite: https://www.google.com/search?q=labradorite&safe=off&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwj1y5iv2P7XAhVQ8WMKHWdeAvUQ_AUICygC&biw=1366&bih=662

Definitions of Magic: https://www.llewellyn.com/encyclopedia/term/Magick

The Crystal Cave by Mary Stewart: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/82192.The_Crystal_Cave

Aleister Crowley’s definition of magic: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Magick_(Thelema)

Ronan’s magic is the oldest in the books: http://maggie-stiefvater.tumblr.com/post/142690071736/the-raven-king-countdown-day-two-favorite

**MAGGIEWATCH**

Maggie’s Dreamer Trilogy Pinterest Board (she’s killing me!): https://www.pinterest.com/maggiestiefvate/dreamers/

- - - - -

Acknowledgements:

The Raven Cycle and all affiliated properties (The Raven Boys,The Dream Thieves, Blue Lily, Lily Blue, and The Raven King) are copyright Maggie Stiefvater and Scholastic, Inc. The Ravin’ Girls reference these properties for the purpose of literary analysis.

Intro and Outro music by Damiano Baldoni, used under CC Attribution License: http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Damiano_Baldoni/Lost_Dinasty/

The original tracks have been edited for the podcast.      

[hellyeahrpmemes]

※ JENNA MARBLES SENTENCE STARTERS, PT. VII ※

here’s sentences from 10 more of jenna’s videos! feel free to change names/pronouns/zodiac signs/etc.! more jenna sentences

DIY WEDDING GIFT 

“I just learned, don’t put lotion on your arms, and touch a poster, cause you’ll get lotion on your poster.”

“I didn’t get my own best friend a wedding gift.”

“And I was like, fuuuuuuuuuck.”

“If I was getting married, what would I want?”

“Give me some money, family and friends, to pay for this sick party I just threw you.”

“I can’t just hand her an envelope with some money in it and be like… happy wedding.”

“This is how you know someone’s your best friend. Because, when it’s their wedding day, all you can think about is fucking with them.”

“Side note, if you ever go to a strip club, and you make them a t-shirt, and you tip them in t-shirts, they appreciate the effort.”

“It’s gonna be the coolest wedding gift ever.”

“I have limited capabilities with what I can do today because I have to leave.”

“Why don’t you come join me in my quest for origami trolling?”

“She hated it, which is exactly why I liked it.”

“She’s sleeping in a bar. Not passed out in a bar, sleeping in a bar. Two very different things. One of them’s funny, one of them’s not.”

“Step one: this. Step two: fucky shit.”

“You… you welcome.”

“Oh, it’s falling apart… oh, it’s a bloodbath.”

“Oh my fucking god…!”

“That is what the fuck I’m talking about.”

“This makes me want to have a whole outfit out of money.”

“We blew it like twelve steps ago.”

“Oh, that’s looking cute as fuck.”

“Even though I fucked it up, this one is still so much easier than a t-shirt with a tie.”

“Regular t-shirts are okay, but t-shirts with a tie? Fuck. Never again.”

“I am pleased with this. This is adorable.”

“Bitch, how?”

“Um, it looks like shit…”

“Five dolla pants make you holla.”

“It looks hard. Pray for my hands.”

“I feel like I regret it already.”

“That doesn’t look anything like that cool Pinterest fuckin picture. This looks like shit.”

“Finesse em around? Do I look like someone who’s good at finessing? Cause I’m not!”

“It looks like absolute garbage, but, you know what, it gets the point across.”

“I don’t think that’s how the song goes.”

“This looks really hard, but this was so much easier than that fucking t-shirt with a tie.”

“Oh my god, that’s fuckin dope.”

“How did you do that?”

“I don’t know, I blacked out the whole time.”

“This is a shamrock that wasn’t worth it at all.”

“I mean, fuck with me everyone else at every wedding that’s ever existed.”

“That’s what friends are for. Fucking with you.”

“Um, see, it works.”

“She spent so much time folding that fucking money.”

“Do you feel congratulated or what?”

“Are you mad at me? Are you gonna kill me?”

30 LIFE LESSONS I LEARNED IN 30 YEARS

“It took me a solid hour of cleaning the whole thing to get the poop out.”

“I would give anything to read that group diary again.”

“A physical journal that you can look back on someday is something I would highly suggest.”

“Unless someone else finds it, in which case, you’re fucked.”

“Just take five minutes and buy a bath mat.”

“I just thought slipping and almost dying was part of my daily shower routine.”

“Just because you know something isn’t right doesn’t mean you can change the way you feel. That’s not how your heart works.”

“Sometimes, whatever seems logical isn’t the right decision, cause it’s not how your heart works.”

“It’s terrible, miserable, awful, don’t do it.”

“Never, ever, ever go on an all-carrots diet.”

“I was crash-dieting and decided I was only gonna eat carrots.”

“It doesn’t work, it’s disgusting, and it’s awful.”

“We would just sit there and take turns bitching about whatever was wrong with our lives.”

“Never say something behind someone’s back that you aren’t completely willing to say directly to their face.”

“When the person comes to you and says, hey, did you say this about me, as long as it’s something I said, I’ll say hell yes I did.”

“I do not shy away from confrontation. I’m a fan of it.”

“Sometimes, it’s necessary. Yeah, sure, people don’t like it, and sometimes, it’s “out of line” and “uncalled for”, but at least I said it to your face.”

“I used to be firmly on team ‘no new shoes ever’.”

“Is Jenna okay? Does she need money for shoes?”

“Just do it man, okay? You’re gonna hurt your legs and your feet, and then your back, and then your neck. It’s gonna be bad.”

“Maybe give our culture a little bit of time to catch up to how beautiful you are just the way you are.”

“You got a good butt.”

“I was never allowed to quit anything ever, you have to see everything through to the end.”

“I ran full speed, hit the springboard, and ran directly into the vault.”

“That is my done time.”

“Just move. Just pack up your shit, get in a truck, and move.”

“Just think of it that way, and it makes it a lot easier, and way less stressful, and not as crazy.”

“Don’t ever try to flush a pork chop down a toilet. Doesn’t work. Just trust me. Doesn’t work.”

“Don’t be ashamed of your human-ness.”

“Some people’s houses are too clean - I don’t trust those people.”

“You know what’s cooler than doing what all of your friends are doing, is not doing what all of your friends are doing.”

“I seriously considered doing it, until I was like, you know what, fuck that.”

“Fuck reading the dictionary, dude, I’m gonna sit here and space out. It’s gonna be a far better use of my time.”

“If you’re ever up really late, and have to be up really early in the morning, just sleep sitting up.”

“If you ever feel like you’re gonna pass out, make sure you tell someone that you feel like you’re gonna pass out.”

“Don’t just fall over. It makes people kinda mad sometimes.”

“I don’t know, I was blacking out.”

“I think it’s just the effort I appreciate.”

“Just take your whole rug and throw it out the window.”

“I learned this in college, where you literally get expelled if you don’t give credit.”

“Nothing about giving credit makes you look bad. If anything, it makes you look good, by citing your sources and having valid places to get information.”

“Don’t ever try a new sport if you’re severely hungover.”

“It’s gross. It’s not worth it. Just say you can’t go or something.”

“Always do the right thing unless it doesn’t feel right.”

“I saw that guy shove a bunch of beer down his pants.”

“You seem like you’re having a hell of a time, and I think the best thing for me to do is just keep it moving.”

“I like to lay down outside and just stare at the sky and think about nothing. Except aliens.”

“I’m a doctor now.”

“Doctors are just people with opinions. You don’t have to listen to them.”

“Sure, they’ve been to school for a whole decade or whatever, but you’ve lived with your body for your whole life.”

“Do I look like I fuckin wanna talk about it?”

“Always know which goals and dreams to pay attention to, and which other ones to just not pay attention to.”

“Hurling a large strawberry milkshake into an oncoming subway is something I dream about daily, but I’m not gonna do it.”

“Whatever choice you made in the past, you made the best choice that you could, given the circumstances at any possible moment you could make.”

I RANT FOR YOU

“The idea of bitching for someone else made me really excited.”

“Just take it easy, man, ya know?”

“If you hate it, tell me, and we’ll never speak of this again, just like lots of things I’ve done.”

“First of all, who the fuck has custom bunk beds?”

“If you guys wanna keep your privilege beds inside of your bougie room, you better start eating.”

“If this was fun, I’d invite my friends over, and charge admission at the door.”

“You know what takes up the most amount of my time is minding my own fucking business.”

“It seems like you can’t follow directions, which is out of my control.”

“You know what’s in my control? Doing jumping jacks with knives! Get fucked.”

“If you don’t find a new place to frick-frack I’m gonna cover my jungle gym in dildos, and the next time you frick-frack on it, it’s gonna frick-frack you back.”

“I’m gonna crash your band with my own band.”

“Fuck your band.”

“Ya nasty, ya phone is nasty, and ya life is nasty.”

“It’s like I’m living with idiots!”

“Fuck our vows, fuck our family, I’m out of this shit.”

“That’s so fucked up and wrong.”

I SUCK AT PRANKS 2

“Julien likes to prank me a lot. He thinks it’s very funny.”

“I tried one time, and it was terrible, but awesome.”

“The only way to get better at something is to try.”

“I wanna prank Julien, but I also love Julien.”

“What would you do for someone that you love in August? You would make it Christmas in August.”

“Good idea, Jenna, I like where this is going.”

“I’m aging myself, here.”

“Whoa, this is amazing, it’s like a wonderland in here.”

“I know, I’m so good at decorating, and also being resourceful, because I don’t have any money.”

“Hopefully, they’ll come out less shit than the last one.”

“Fuck you, YouTube tutorial, you just got your shit lit up!”

“In your face, Julien, what are you gonna do about this?”

“You know what this shape is called? Fuckin’ pranked.”

“I think I’m gonna wrap it up so that he thinks that I got him a present for Christmas, but I totally didn’t. He bought it for himself.”

“Fuckin’ pranked, fuckin’ got you!”

“If this prank doesn’t get Julien off my back once and for all, nothing will.”

“Nothing says don’t fuck with me quite like ‘I just made you a Christmas’.”

“Who is Santa Claus? Me. Don’t fuck with me.”

“Julien’s half-Jewish, so we should incorporate that somehow.”

“I’m running out of time, and it’s the thought that counts.”

“It’s lookin’ like real fuckin’ got you in here.”

“I found a wreath, and pulled the tree out of the garage.”

“Shitty Christmas about to happen…!”

“If I’m Christmas-ing, we’re all Christmas-ing.”

“Oh hell yeah, that’s what I’m talking about.”

“What the literal fuck?”

“I’m gonna black out, what is happening?”

“Why don’t you come yonder into Christmas winter wonderland?”

“You like it? It’s Christmas.”

“Oh my god, this is magical.”

“Did I get you or what?”

“I didn’t wanna be disrespectful and light it when it wasn’t necessarily Hanukkah.”

“Come over here, look what Santa has brought you.”

“I bought this two days ago for myself.”

“You’re fuckin’ sick.”

“That’s a dead cockroach, that’s real…!”

“Just ‘cause he’s dead doesn’t mean he can’t enjoy Christmas…!”

“This is the thing dreams and nightmares are simultaneously made of.”

“I feel so pranked.”

“That was the most sensory overload I’ve had in, like, six years.”

“How long did this take you?”

“I can’t look at you…!”

“Do I suck at pranks? Yeah. But is my heart in the right place? For sure.”

“Don’t throw him out, he’s our friend…!”

“Nobody expects a Christmas prank in August.”

“Merry Christmas and Hanukkah and Kwanzaa and stuff.”

HOW I USED TO DO MY MAKEUP

“I know what you’re thinking: Jenna, your face is terrifying!”

“I’m seriously down this rabbit hole, and I can’t get out.”

“I wanna be part of your beautiful people club, what the fuck.”

“It’s not like I could just go educate myself on how to do my makeup.”

“I had two books, and I just looked at the pictures.”

“It seemed a little ridiculous to put on a full face of makeup and then go play a sport later.”

“I was actually one of the most unmemorable people ever.”

“It kills me when I see these 9-year-olds with their Naked palettes crafting perfect little smokey eyes, like, what the fuck.”

“I didn’t exactly start off on a good foot.”

“This was look number one. It’s pretty good-looking, if you ask me.”

“I was not allowed to wear makeup.”

“Jenna, what’s on your face?”

“Mom, it’s not a big deal, okay? I’m in fifth grade, now, and I’m trying to get the boys to pay attention to me.”

“Why are you cockblocking me, Mom?”

“You know what I’m gonna do? I’m gonna smuggle in this pink lipstick and this blue eyeshadow, and I’m gonna put it on when I get there.”

“Jenna, I said wipe it off…!”

“Shit, my mom followed me to school…!”

“I mean, she had good reason.”

“I looked ridiculous.”

“It was a good plan…!”

“I was allowed to wear a little eyeliner and some mascara to draw attention away from my braces.”

“You’re late for second period.”

“I thought I was a real lady.”

“Are you laughing at me?”

“This was a choice.”

“I thought it was a good look.”

“You can’t see that, but you know what it achieves.”

“What the fuck, you could do this to your hair?!”

“I was also just reminded that this was a look.”

“That’s what I thought you’re supposed to do: when you get a palette of colors, you have to use every color in it.”

“I was too scared to try black. I was nervous.”

“Hey, you wanna Nair your stomach?”

“I was just doing it to be a good friend.”

“Dude, fuck yeah, fuck me up with it.”

“Holy fuck, fam, this is my new look.”

“Welcome, everyone, to my new face.”

“I looked like this for a few days at school until someone was like, what the fuck is wrong with your face?”

“I was in the other room, did you say ‘don’t cockblock me, Mom’?”

“The only time I could do it was in my room, alone.”

“I thought to myself: finally, I can be my true self.”

“Turns out there’s a time and a place for everything, and the place for this was college.”

“Fuck, you really don’t remember me, do you? Fuck, I’m so unmemorable.”

“I’m not a raccoon, this was a look…!”

“These are fucking dope.”

“Are you calling me a garbage lady?”

“They were ridiculous, and I did like them a lot.”

QUESTIONS VIDEO #6

“It’s been a rough few weeks for me.”

“I feel like my brain doesn’t work.”

“It’s kind of rude of me to be like, Julien, can you get the fuck out?”

“I think it’s time that I answer some questions for you.”

“If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put it on your butt… it’s good-looking.”

“A good line if you just wanna go in for the kill is you say ‘hey, you’ve got something on your lips’, and they’re like ‘oh, what is it’, and then you just go ‘my lips’ and then you just kiss them. Unless you think that’s too forward, in which case, don’t do it.”

“On our way over here, some lady woke up in the middle of the night and fell over in the plane.”

“I’m actually pretty scared of flying.”

“She’s fucking reading that little pamphlet right now? Like, that’s… what the fuck. No one does that.”

“I’m sorry that I like to be informed and educated.”

“If shit got real, I’d take the pamphlet with me. It says take nothing with you, but I would take that pamphlet.”

“This is a rule. You knew this coming in here.”

“I’m sorry for just being good at following the rules. I’m a rule follower.”

“Y’all are fucked up, y’all need Jesus.”

“I think I was just sort of an angry person for a while.”

“I think that’s what being an adult is: buying things that you hate, and also having to shut your mouth all the time, and bottle it all on the inside, instead of just letting it out.”

“He’s a tornado in the kitchen. He can make things in record speed, but it also means that he’s left out every ingredient that it takes to make it.”

“That is not the garbage.”

“I will also be sort of passive-aggressive about it.”

“Sorry for being alive. I didn’t realize I couldn’t be alive.”

“You forget that I have ears.”

“I can’t just explain things to you all day every day and why they’re funny.”

“You can use your imagination.”

“You can freak out the whole time, or you can just let it happen.”

“That makes a fuckin… oh my god, that makes a mess. What are you doing, that’s disgusting.”

“I don’t know why people like that so much.”

“I can see you. You guys aren’t that sneaky.”

“I’m not doing anything that you can’t do.”

“That was embarrassing. I’ll never do it again.”

“Hit me up. I’m here.”

“Just keep doin’ what you’re doin’.”

“Nobody knows what they’re doing. Welcome to being alive.”

“I have a weird aversion to taking anything that I don’t absolutely have to take.”

“One time when I was in fourth grade, we watched an animated movie about heroin, and I passed out.”

“You just sit up there, and you’re like, fuck with me, fuck with me…!”

“I don’t even know where I am or what time it is.”

EAR BLOOD

“The storyteller of our generation.”

“I have no idea what I’m doing, everything I’ve made is garbage, which is why I like it.”

“Step one: don’t touch the machine.”

“This sucks.”

“Which side of history do you want to be on?”

“I mean, this is a lot, but I like it.”

“How can I make this less loud?”

“I mean, that was pretty amazing.”

“Are you not entertained?”

“It’s got a touch of romance.”

“Here is my masterpiece so far.”

HOW TO CARE FOR YOUR CERMET 2

“There are so many more tips that I have neglected to share with you.”

“Thinking they’re being useful helps them grow.”

“They’re very sensitive and need emotional support.”

“Murdering their friends helps them grow.”

“It’s like trying to pet a fish.”

“They can’t go to Chipotle, don’t listen to them, it’s a trap.”

“Just kidding, they’re full grown.”

“Is it stupid? Yes. Does it make me laugh? Yes.”

“Sorry I look kind of like trash right now.”

JENNA’S RACHET FASHION BOUTIQUE: MY BOYFRIEND

“Close-minded eyeshadow people can leave.”

“Thank you for your prayers.”

“Get the fuck outta here.”

“I love the fabric store.”

“Every week, I make a giant mess in a different room in my house.”

“This could be a disastrous idea.”

“I can’t believe this worked…!”

“You’re a fucking genius, how did you do this?”

“Don’t do that, you’re gonna break it…!”

“You look like a little cupcake.”

“Deception: I’m so good at it.”

“Ooh, deeper, that feels good.”

“Define right spot; I don’t think anything about this is in the right spot.”

“If you can dream it, you can do it, Julien.”

“I think I’m a damn good-looking princess.”

“Stop doing that, you’re gonna break it.”

“It’s incredibly dysfunctional, while, at the same time, it looks good.”

“That should be my name: the tornado princess.”

“I could go to the ball, and wear this dress, but I can also fit a beach ball in the dress, too, so it’s like a double ball.”

“This is the only functional part of this outfit.”

“This doesn’t fit through doorways.”

“That’s like making a key that’s not compatible for keyholes.”

“Aren’t you booked for, like, a year?”

“You’re breaking it…!”

“Dazzle us, Julien. Be a princess.”

“It’s hanging on for dear life.”

ULTIMATE 100 COATS OF THINGS VIDEO

“I wanna do this, but I wanna do it hard as fuck.”

“Since day one, I did not come here to play games.”

“I’m not positive that all of these are going to work.”

“This couch will be ruined.”

“I think we all know instantly why no one has done that before. This is a terrible idea.”

“My face feels gross.”

“I promise you, on my life, I am not skipping any steps.”

“This is a very time-consuming process.”

“Let me bring you in nice and close.”

“I think it adds to the whole look.”

“This might be the day that my too much gene really is too much.”

“I look great…!”

“I need an adult…!”

“Someone send help for me…”

“That would suck. It wouldn’t be worth it at all.”

“This is starting to burn a little.”

“I did not cheat at all.”

“This is the worst decision I’ve ever made in my life.”

“It looks terrible. I hate everything about it.”

“I mean, a lot of my soul is dead.”

“This only came from a place of pure curiosity.”

“Do I look like someone who wants to hurt your feelings?”

“I fucking did it!”

“I hate everything else. With fury.”

“It’s the worst? Worse than this?”

“I don’t think I would wish this experience on anyone, ever.”

“I’m not sure if it can ever feel clean again.”

“Don’t do that, don’t do that, stop it.”

“This looks great and you fucking know it.”

“It wasn’t as painful as I thought it was gonna be.”

“It’s never gonna come off.”

“I regret everything.”

“I wanna take this whole day back.”

“It took me seven and a half hours for a very mediocre payoff.”

“I did it, I gave it my all.”

“I will never, ever, ever, ever do anything like this again.”

“I don’t know how I’m gonna fix my life — it’s permanently ruined.”

“We’re never doing this again, and we’re never talking about it again, either.”