#pictures taken outside because it was the first warm day of the year

[sweetteainthesummerx]

|◁ II ▷| down bad ! |◁ II ▷|

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nhl masterlist !

pairing: quinn hughes x famous singer! reader

warnings: fluff, smut is implied but not graphic!! use of y/n.

summary: your sister sends you an article of you and quinn being absolutely down bad for each other...

word count: 2.4 k

notes: saw one too many edits of my handsome boy on TikTok and this is the consequence :) also, this is sort of based off of taylor swift and travis kelce. enjoy!

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you're finishing up in the studio, just done tweaking one of your last songs on your new album when your phone dings! with a notification.

it's your sister, who sends a trail of emojis that don't really make sense and a link.

you press on it, confused and assuming it's something she wants for her birthday that's coming up soon.

instead it's an article that reads, TOP TEN FAN FAVOURITE MOMENTS OF NHL AND THE MUSIC INDUSTRY'S ROYAL COUPLE.

you laugh, because the cover photo is one of you and quinn from last year when you took him as your plus one to the grammy's. you have to admit, you both look really good, and so, so in love.

so you nestle into your chair to read it.

TOP TEN FAN FAVOURITE MOMENTS OF NHL AND THE MUSIC INDUSTRY'S ROYAL COUPLE

one of Hollywood's up and comings, y/n l/n and quinn hughes of canucks and nhl fame have been dating for over three years, and have been public for two. we have complied a list of fan favourite moments of the couple over the span of their relationship that show their deep (and public) affection and love for each other

10. 2023 Grammy's Award Ceremony

picture: you are wearing a light blue floor length gown, hair loose and curled. your makeup is simple and glowy. quinn stands next to you, in a clean, slate grey suit with a hand wrapped around your hip, fingers nestled in the dip of your hipbone.

the award ceremony for the grammy's - where y/n won best album for the second year in a row - was when the famous couple first went public officially, not counting the many paparazzi pictures taken in both vancouver and Los Angeles.

sources show that the two could hardly keep their hands off of each other. they were seen kissing multiple times through out the night.

it was true, quinn had been extra handsy that night, and had all but ripped that dress off of you when you got back to the hotel. you sigh at the memory, stomach warm and a little achy. you can't wait for him to come back from the roadie he left for only two days ago.

9. y/n's tiktoks

despite their massive success in their respective industries, it is easy to forget that they are also part of gen z. y/n's TikTok page features fashion, her music and most popular of all, her boyfriend. here are only some of her most viewed and liked videos:

video one: you smile into the camera, fluffing your hair in a close shot. the subtitles read: fit check with my bf! quinn pulls you against him by your waist, kissing your face over and over as you laugh, pushing at his chest. over the song, you tell him to let go so you can show your outfits. he lets go reluctantly but holds your hand, spinning you around to show off your sundress. then he grabs you and dips you low, hands dangerously close to your ass, as you giggle into his cheek.

video two: the video is taken by one of your friends who took your phone. she's on the couch and you and quinn are in the kitchen cooking for the small get together in your vancouver apartment. you lean up to smile at him, and he bumps his nose with yours. some trending love song plays in the back.

you flush at the comments gushing about how he looks at you, the height difference and how cute you guys are. there's something so sweet at seeing the two of you from an outsiders perspective.

8. quinn knowing y/n's entire discography

during media days, one interview has elias petterson and quinn hughes guessing songs and the artists. the journalist managed to sneak at least four of y/n's songs in, quinn getting all four correct, with the full name of the song, name of artist and then album, all under 10 seconds of the song playing. now that's a supportive boyfriend!

you watch the video linked, your boyfriend sweaty and hair wet. the media person is impressed, and quinn just shrugs bashfully and offers a crooked smile. you look at the time stamp and bite a grin: it's from before you guys went public. no wonder all of your fans say you guys were obvious.

7. quinn hughes: nhl player and personal bodyguard

fame in hollywood forces many in the industry to have body guards, and y/n is not exempt. for many years before she started dating the canuck's defensemen, she's had many bodyguards following her around. now, it seems like her boyfriend has taken over that job.

video: your body guard, john moves to open the limo door as you and quinn arrive to an event, but your boyfriend crosses from his side of the car to open it himself, patting john on the shoulder and gently pushing him from the entrance and helping you out himself. he helps you balance on your heels as you stand and wave at the cameras, one hand on your waist as he maneuvers you to the other side of the sidewalk so he can block you from the cars. he keeps your hand cradled in his, his other arm around your waist as he shoulders through the paparazzi.

quinn looks so attractive and so masculine in this video. you've never had boyfriends who took princess treatment so seriously, but quinn has always been a defender, on ice and off. it was a little awkward and it took a long a while for him to get you, but ever since he had you, he's made sure he tried his very best to keep and protect you.

6. getaway in hawaii

although the couple hasn't had any announcement of engagement yet, early last year they were sighted in hawaii on a trip eerily like a honeymoon: here are some pictures.

picture one: you're in a tiny pink bikini and he's in board shorts. he's taken off his hat to give to you, and you're pressing on a pair of your too-small sunglasses onto his face while both of you laugh.

picture two: the two of you are standing in the water up to your calves. he's got his fingers tangled in the strings of your bikini bottoms, and yours are on his chest as the two of you look into the horizon.

picture three: quinn has you balanced on his shoulder, smiling as you clutch at his back. one of his forearms is possessively covering your ass from the camera, and his other hand is wrapped fully around your ankle to give you a semblance of balance.

you still smile every time you think of that trip, afternoons playing in the water, romantic dinners and nights with his head between your legs, your fingers tangled in his hair. you silently remind yourself to book a vacation back there the next time both of you are free.

5. the NHL award ceremony

the recent NHL award ceremony when quinn hughes received the James Norris award for his skills as a defenceman gave us another peek into y/n's relationship with hughes family.

video one: you're sitting between quinn and luke in your pretty dark blue gown. your hair is pulled back from your face the way quinn likes. he's got an arm thrown over the back of the seat, fingers rubbing your shoulder as you talk to Luke about his hair routine. quinn murmurs something the camera can't catch into your ear and you laugh, tucking your hand into the his that's resting on his lap. he leans back, stretching his legs as you absentmindedly rub his knee, leaning over his brothers to talk to his mom.

video two: his name is called, and you stand with him, clapping loudly. he hugs you first, and you press a kiss into the corner of his lip, but he plants a firm, real one on yours. your manicured, white nails contrast against the black expanse of his suit and broad back. you push him gently towards luke. when he's finished hugging everyone and comes back down the aisle, you quickly fix his tie and smooth down his lapels. he kisses your cheek again and goes down to the stage.

photo three: the trophy is in the middle, the whole family wrapped together. you're tucked between ellen, the older woman has an arm around your waist and your boyfriend's got is arm slung across you shoulders on you other side, everyone smiling big for the camera.

you still remember ellen and jim insisting that you get in the photo, because "you're practically family anyways," and "it's any day now" that their son proposes to you. the photo is on their fridge, to this day.

4. quinn's y/n shirt

another video from y/n's tiktok. during the christmas season, she spent the holidays with the hughes family. her future brother in law (hopefully), jack hughes got quinn a pretty special present.

video: jack is holding the camera, and it pans to you and quinn. your holding a giant sushi stuffed toy (long story) from luke on your lap as you sit next to your boyfriend.

"here," he extends a hand holding a bag to his older brother.

Quinn smiles in thanks and digs into it, retrieving shirt. but it's no ordinary shirt. it's one of those old, retro looking ones with your face blown out all over it.

pictures from red carpets, your album covers, and in gaudy, shadowy text, it reads: IF LOST, RETURN TO Y/N L/N.

Luke cackles as you bury your face in quinn's shoulder. he's letting out a deep, belly laugh as his parents smile and take pictures of it when he holds it out.

he immediately pulls off his sweatshirt and tugs the shirt on. it fits a little tight.

"merry christmas!" jack yells as he gives you a high-five.

he still wears that stupid shirt around the apartment, just because he knows you like the fit and your face plastered all over his chest.

3. y/n's songs about her boyfriend

through many new releases, we have determined a list of songs about quinn from her new album, lover.

sweet nothing

paper rings

lover

daylight

I think he knows

afterglow

good looking

wow, you think. these people must not have lives if they're rummaging through your digital footprint and media presence with your boyfriend just to link them with your songs.

2. quinn's interview

since the couple has gone public, y/n has been seen at Canuck's games with family and friends. since she's from vancouver, born and raised, she is passionate about hockey and fits right in.

video one: the jumbotron flashes your face an name; you're wearing quinn's canucks jersey, hair loose. you smile and flutter your fingers at the crowd that's going crazy. one the ice, quinn's teammates jostle and holler at him, and you blow him a kiss. he pretends to catch it, and the screaming in the stadium reaches a new level as the screen pans to him: he's pink and all smiley.

video two: the ref makes a call and you stand, throwing your hands up in the air, exasperated. you huff, sitting back down with your head in your hands. your friends watch on with disappointment, and the three of you let out complains.

video three: quinn grins while looking off camera in the middle of an interview, and the journalist laughs.

"your girl?" he asks, and quinn nods shyly.

"yeah, it's real nice to see her here supporting. I mean, she's really busy too with her tours, but it's nice to have her on my turf."

"I saw! she got really riled up for the penalty during the second period. she's wearing your jersey as well."

"yeah," he scratches his neck, scrunching his nose to hide the big ass smile on his face, "she looks great, eh?"

"glad to see her in her hometown, too."

"right. yeah, I love her so much."

you snicker at how love sick he looks, because early on in the relationship he followed you around like a clingy, lost puppy. he still does sometimes after a roadie or one of your tours. you love it.

1. karma is the guy on the rink, coming straight home to me

the internet broke when y/n changed one of the songs on her song list for her tour last year at rogers arena in vancouver: instead of "karma is the guy on the screen, coming straight home to me", which is a reference to her ex, she changes it to better fix her new romance.

video: you dance through the song, your backup dancers clueless as you reach the line.

"karma is the guy on the rink, comin' straight home to me!" your voice breaks a little in a giggle at the end, your dancers shocked laughter and gasps visible from their faces that even an iPhone camera from 25 meters away can catch.

video two: quinn's in the tent with your parents and some of his teammates and their girlfriends, all of them are vibing to the music and dancing, most holding drinks in their hands.

when the line hits the speakers, everyone is screaming so loud and filming him, and he blushes so red that it spreads to his ears and neck, even in the dim light. his boys are slapping his back, and your dad gives him a high-five. he just smiles at you, dopey and deliriously happy in his shirt of your face and the 20 friendship bracelets your fans had made for him.

you remember that show perfectly, and the night after even better. you barely got any sleep because of his attentions, and your makeup artists spent nearly half an hour covering up the bruises on your neck and chest the next morning.

all in all, we can come to the conclusion that quinn hughes and y/n l/n are completely down bad for each other, like she teased in the song list of her unreleased album. we only hope for good things in the future for this famous couple!

you smile at the closing statement, sending it to quinn to read later in his hotel room.

he facetimes you that night, hair wet and eyes sleepy.

"that article was absolutely right. I am so down bad for you." he tells you seriously, with the promise of lots of love when he comes straight home to you.

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© sweetteainthesummerx.tumblr. all rights reserved. unauthorized copying, translation, or claiming of my writing or any works as your own is strictly prohibited.

[luciel-anciel]

Bound to Falling in Love

(Rody x Vince) (Dead Plate)

A/N: I wanted to make something lighthearted, my intention was to write a "Touch Starved but Affectionate Boyfriend x Partner, who hates being touched"

I'm still planning on writing something with the same dialogue expect make it darker, but for now— have something bittersweet.

His thumb brushed against the crumpled polaroid , the picture had been clumsily stuffed into his pockets numerous times. It was an image of him with Vince on his side; a grimace ever so obvious, a deep frown on his face— glaring at him for disrupting his work.

Rody lets out a small laugh, this was taken during his first month working at the bistro. Vince never smiled that much outside from his professional line of work, he'd show a charismatic smile in those newspaper clippings but he could tell Vince’s smile was stiff.

Speaking of the devil, his boyfriend stepped into their shared apartment. His perfect posture gone as he abruptly slouched his shoulders, the weight of the day's stress evident in the tension that radiated from his every step

The old polaroid now placed on the nightstand.

He only kept that formal and well mannered facade when eyes watched him, Rody knew how much his partner cared deeply for his reputation, even more than death.

“Evening handsome, rough time at work?” The brunette’s tone was soft, no longer brash or rowdy— just gentle. If you listened closely, there was a slight firmness to his tone as if his gentleness felt forced.

“Mhm.” Vince's only response was a weary sigh as he made his way to the couch, collapsing into it with a heavy thud. Rody's heart ached at the sight of his partner so exhausted, but he refused to be deterred and followed Vince like a lost puppy.

His eyes seemed to have withered under the strain of his responsibilities, leaving behind a man consumed by his own inner turmoil.

“By the looks of it, it does seem like a rough day.” The brunette showed a warm smile, hoping to offer some semblance of comfort. Though with the way how Vince looked at him— It felt like he was talking to a brick wall.

The tan skinned man sat next to Vince, he slowly moved closer to him but noticed his lover, straying a bit further away from him. Oh how Rody wished that Vince would lay his head on his shoulder instead of the pillow.

Vince’s pale hand clutched the pillow tightly, a hint of vulnerability showed in his blank demeanor for a second.

Rody approached cautiously and reached out to hold his hand. But as his fingers brushed against Vince's, the reaction was immediate and sharp.

"Don't," Vince muttered, attempting to slap Rody's hand away, his fear of touch manifesting in the harshness of his actions.

But Rody held on, his grip firm yet gentle, refusing to let go. He still kept on persisting.

"Why'd you stay with me for so long?" Vince's voice was barely a whisper, filled with confusion and a touch of bitterness. He preferred to be blunt.

"Because I love you" Rody replied, his affection had always been sincere, never the type to lie about his affection as well.

His voice unwavering and he played around with Vince's fingers, intertwining them together.

To Vince, when people say a word too much or too often, it cheapens the meaning.

“I—I loved you enough to let you tear me into pieces.” Rody’s tone wasn't one out of desperation nor infatuation, rather it sounded like someone that endured hardships, one who's tone sacrificed so much to fight for the ones he loved even when he had to go through immense pain.

Vince, upon hearing that, could only hold his head down low in shame.

The amount of times the two fought, felt meaningless now. Excruciatingly long years spent building bonds and reluctantly given trust— was all lost under a fit of rage.

It was always Rody that would reconcile to Vince, asking for forgiveness and he always let his pride get to him.

He brought Vince's hand to his chest, feeling the steady beat of his own heart beneath it. “And I loved you enough that I was willing to let all your mistakes be ignored even when it kept me awake at night…”

"Why?" His dark eyes softened, a flicker of emotion breaking through his hardened exterior.

Rody had nights where he laid awake, staring at his lover's resting face. Their faces were a few inches apart, and he would keep looking at Vince's peaceful expression, trying to match his breathing pattern. It calmed him down, made him feel closer to Vince in a way that words could never capture.

He would watch the gentle rise and fall of Vince’s chest, the way his lashes fluttered slightly with his dreams. Rody wondered when Vince would look at him like that, with calmness, with such a rested expression. The sight brought a strange mixture of comfort and longing. Comfort, because he could be near the person he loved most; longing, because he wished Vince could find the same peace in their love that he did.

He pondered, would Vince ever look at him so calmly when awake?

The man shook his head gently, his other hand slowly reaching up to touch Vince's cheek. "I loved you even when I felt like I was losing myself.”

A pained expression crossed Vince's face as he whispered, "I'm sorry."

Silence hung between them, the weight of Rody's words settling over Vince like a heavy blanket. In that silence, the pale man thought about all the ways he had failed his lover, all the times his actions had caused pain rather than joy.

He didn’t want to lose Rody, nor did he want Rody to bear the burden of their relationship alone.

Vince leaned into Rody's touch, his eyes closing as he absorbed the warmth and reassurance that radiated from his partner. "I don't deserve you" he murmured, his voice thick with emotion.

Rody's smile was soft and filled with unconditional love. "You deserve to be loved, Vince. And I'm here, always."

He placed a soft kiss on Vince’s forehead, Rody was gentle with his actions.

"And I loved you even when I constantly questioned myself why I'm still staying with you," Rody finished, his hand cupping Vince's cheek tenderly, his thumb brushing away a stray tear.

Vince sat there rigid, the feeling of his warm lips lingered on his skin, his body feeling overwhelmed, instinctively flinched at the initial touch.

The idea of being vulnerable, of letting someone in so intimately, was foreign and uncomfortable for him. He had built walls around his heart for so long that the simple act of a hug felt almost foreign.

Rody, sensing Vince's hesitation, moved slowly, his hand moving away from his cheeks. He didn't force the embrace but instead offered it, letting Vince decide whether to accept it fully or not

For a moment, Vince remained stiff, his muscles tense as if he were bracing for impact. His mind raced with doubts and fears, but he had to take a chance-?

Slowly, Vince's defenses began to crumble. His arms, initially hanging awkwardly at his sides, moved to encircle Rody's waist. The touch was hesitant at first, Vince unaware how to even hold his own lover.

Vince was still scared to hold his arms around Rody; embracing him and though his actions were meticulously slow, the way he moved his arms to wrap around Rody’s waist was quite slow, matching the pace of a snail.

He felt the steady, calming presence of Rody's heartbeat against his chest. It was a rhythm that spoke of acceptance, a reminder that he wouldn't be rushed, that Rody wouldn't force him to deal with his ‘issue’ quickly.

Gradually, Vince's grip tightened, his fingers curling into the fabric of Rody's shirt.

Vince buried his face into the crook of Rody's neck, his breath warm and shaky against his tan skin. The reluctance was still there, a lingering doubt that gnawed at the edges of his mind, but the comfort of Rody's embrace began to soothe the turmoil within him.

Rody held him patiently once more, his hands gently rubbing Vince's back in slow, reassuring circles. He could feel the tension slowly ebbing away from Vince's body, replaced by a tentative acceptance of the intimacy they were sharing.

He was careful with his touches, or where he even touched the man— avoiding places where Vince felt the most discomfort.

As Vince finally allowed himself to melt into the hug, streams of tears escaped his tightly shut eyes, tracing a path down his cheek. He clung to Rody as if afraid he might disappear, finding solace in the warmth and safety of his partner's arms. It was a reluctant surrender, but a surrender nonetheless, and in that embrace, Vince began to realize that maybe, just maybe, he didn't have to face everything alone.

There was still a part of him that disliked being touched, a part of him that would flinch at the faintest of touch but he wanted to still try, he wanted to embrace Rody in his arms, just this once.

[agentwriter]

So, I sort of got an Operation Blackout headcanon. Real angsty too to go with the whumptober vibe so be prepared-

I saw a couple days ago a post about how canonically Rookie was doing the laundry when Herbert nabbed him, and I went “damn, that’s anticlimatic” because I imagined things going a lot differently. Picture this scenario:

Rookie is taking a walk around, knowing damn well that he’s one of Herbert’s targets by being the EPF’s Comms lead, if G and Dot’s kidnappings mean anything. He’s been getting bad vibes all day, so he’s been trying to keep his nerves on check by not worrying too much, maybe it’s just the growing coldness getting to him? Or the lack of sunlight despite being day leaving him uneasy? Either way, he continues on, hopeful that Herbert hasn’t caught onto his location yet, even if he’s obviously the least careful around his secret identity of all agents with how much stuffed he has leaked to the media along the years.

He tries to chill out, and that goes fine until Rookie hears a couple of suspicious clicks ahead and spots a couple crabs looking at him, and in any other occasion Rookie would approach and greet them with open arms, however, these crabs aren’t supposed to be here. They should be underwater, burrowing in lumps of sand until the temperature gets warm enough for them to be cozy around the island…

Unless, these crabs are here for him.

He should’ve guessed Herbert’s crab army would be a part of this whole scheme, the agent blinks once and crustaceans are gone, even so, he can feel their little ways watching him from somewhere hidden now. How long have they been following him?! The EPF’s teleportation system’s been broken ever since Gary disappeared (and no one managed to fix it without him) and he couldn’t really run to one of the resistance’s hideouts and risk their existence- So he decides to run to his igloo that is a bit close and lock all the doors as fast as possible.

After doing that, he hears some bangs coming from outside and immediately figures he’s cornered. Rookie shoots an SOS message to other agents but he doubts he’ll be able to escape his fate, especially when Dot, someone known for being able to sneak past the most sticky situations, couldn’t. While Rookie realizes that Herbert is going to take him away from his friends and leak his agent info like he did with the others he captured, he decided to make one final message.

And here’s another headcanon inside another scenario but just hear me out- Rookie is a comntent creator. Even before he joined the PSA he did silly vlog videos and livestreams where he chatted and game’d a bit. Of course, he couldn’t really upload more of his wholesome content while dealing with Herbert’s dictatorship in Operation Blackout, and since the Club Penguin News was taken over too, Rookie, along with many other penguin content creators, became replacement sources of information for all of Club Penguin that wished to know where to find food, shelter, if the resistance is doing any progress and all that, so basically-

The day Rookie was kidnapped, he did one last livestream.

He barricades the door of his recording room and immediately starts the stream. The viewers can see something’s different just by the way the whole thing is setup, Rookie looks nervous, and decides since this is probably the first thing Herbert will leak when he’s captured, he figures it will eb better if he does it himself. So instead of the usual welcomes and smiles, he starts the transmission with “I’m Rookie. Officer of Public Relations and leader of the EPF’s Communication sector, and I have a small announcement for you all…”

The message is actually pretty short, 6-7 minutes at most, and Rookie is overall very serious despite being apparently nervous. He talks about the Blackout, and how everyone that has resisted Herbert has been suffering, and how the EPF is sparing no effort to bring things back to normal, and apologizes since he’s going to be offline for a while. He mentions other channels that could serve as good sources of information while he’s gone and then asks for everyone to maintain hope despite it all, that Club Penguin has faced a lot of disasters together, and that this one won’t be any different.

By this point, the way Rookie was glancing sideways together with the bangs coming from somewhere off-screen, the chat was begging him to escape.

But he didn’t, using his final minutes to do a personal goodbye. He talks about his friends at the EPF, how all of them are incredibly resourceful and fierce, and especially good at their jobs. Rookie asks them to be strong, just as he’ll try to be now. He’s scared but hopeful, and just then, a powerful blow breaks the door down.

The camera is knocked off into the ground and sounds of struggles along with clicks can be heard, the commotion doesn’t take long either, and when EPF’s tactical team finally arrive on the scene, it’s too late.

Rookie’s igloo is empty of it’s owner, and a couple of hours later, Herbert shares the news with glee along with more confidential stuff, as a treat.

And like that, Operation Blackout continues.

So ye, this is the headcanon. There’s more that could be discussed about it like the other agents reaction (jetkie angst yummy) and how Rookie gets an earful by the Director when everything is over. But that’s the main meat of it. I should probably translate this into proper fanfiction format later (idk if there’s a lot of club penguin fanfic readers out there tho), but it would be nest anyways.

Thanks for reading this ^^

[inureiris]

Mob AU! Buck Begins

Evan “Buck” Buckley grows up associated with the Kendall mob. His parents worked in the banking industry and weren’t above taking a little to hide a lot. Buck sees things that he knows he shouldn’t have and Maddie tells him to forget about them, to pretend nothing happened.

When Buck is 10, his sister catches the eye of Doug Kendall, not one of the main Kendalls but a trusted cousin. She’s married and gone by Buck’s 12th birthday. Buck doesn’t see or hear from her again, until his 18th. She sends him a card with her and Doug’s signature, and manages to call him to tell him to look in under her bed for his gift.

Attached to the bottom of Maddie’s bed frame, Buck finds a fist-sized box with $500 of cash in small notes, a set of car keys, and a note that reads,

“Dear Buck,

Happy 18th Birthday! I know you probably haven’t heard from me in ages but please trust me one last time. Go to those coordinates. Take the jeep. Run. Take these next 5 years, and go. See the world. LEAVE PENNSYLVANIA.

All my Love, Maddie.

[coordinates of car]

P.S. I pinkie promise I explain all of this one day”

Buck does as he is told by the one person he knows loves him. He runs. He goes to the east coast for a year and surfs, goes north for two and works on a ranch. Until one day, he notices some familiar faces around him and promptly gets on the first international flight he can afford, which brings him to Peru. He stays in Peru, bartending, for about a year until he hears the whispers. The Kendall mob was taken down by the police. It’s time to go home.

As soon as he lands in LA, there’s a cop waiting for him with a picture of him and his sister as kids. Sergeant Athena Grant tells him that his sister wanted to be here but was under witness protection. Sergeant Grant hadn’t planned to do anything more than tell the kid about his sister but she looks at his sad puppy eyes and feels her mama bear instincts rise up. She offers him the guest room in her house and a warm meal. Buck, although suspicious, agrees.

He stays the night and then goes out the next morning to get a job. He searches for a week but finds nothing. Athena ends up finding him a job at a coffee bar that Micheal frequents. Buck tries to move out after a month, but Athena puts her foot down. Safe and affordable apartments are hard to find and the cost of living is high in LA, he should just pay her for the utilities he uses and stay. So he does.

He ends up spending a lot of time with May and Harry since they adore him and follow him around like ducklings. He learns to cook from Athena, both Micheal and Athena sit with him to figure out what he wants to do with his life. He settles on becoming a firefighter and Micheal insists on dropping him off for his first day of training as well as taking a picture of him outside the building.

Buck ends up still working part-time at the coffee bar because he wants to keep paying his rent (much to Athena’s displeasure). That Christmas, Athena gives him adult adoption papers and after they file the papers, she gives Evan ‘Buck’ Grant back the money he kept trying to give her for rent.

He meets the handsome Eddie Diaz and his adorable son at work, the day after he’s changed all his papers to his new name.

[see the rest of this AU]

[bendysinitiation]

(A timeline of events from an outsider’s perspective, based on @bendyredrawn ‘s very own timeline! In this world, JDS’s growth is much like Fleischer Studios, with some things from Disney.)

1919 - Drew-Stein Studios is created by Joey Drew and Henry Stein. They also release their first short, “Little Devil Darlin'“. It stars a misunderstood little imp that tries to keep a job in turning people to sin. It becomes a hit with minority groups, such as immigrants, as escapism from the riots of the time, and conservative whites of New York find it blasphemous.

1920 - “Imp from the Inkwell“ Is released. In this story, the imp, now named Bendy, gets into antics with a live action Henry Stein. The production of short comics also start, introducing an unnamed hellhound into the picture.

1922 - More cartoons and comics are made. Notably, Boris makes his entrance in “Boorish Beasts”. He is Bendy’s acquaintance and foil, being quiet and calculative, but warm-hearted.

1925 - The Bendy film “Tombstone Picnic” makes a breakthrough by becoming the first ever animated “talkie” through vitaphone. The titular character is voiced by none other than Joey himself. Drew-Stein Studios hits the top of the charts for animation in America.

1926 - Another series, Telltale Trio, is introduced into the catalogue. It is not focused on the well-known imp from hell, but instead a trio of ghastly animals haunting a small town. Drew-Stein Studios changes its name to Joey Drew Studios.

1927-1930 - Countless other comics and talkies are released. The idea of angels are also introduced to the Bendy series. JDS grows exponentially in young employees during the start of the Great Depression.

1932-1933 - One year of mostly comics. Rumors go around that JDS is buying out a new studio in the Brooklyn area to house all its new departments. Joey Drew mentions big things are coming, but keeps it a surprise.

1933 - Construction finishes on the new studio and production moves in. Several female singers, musicians, and foley artists are also hired around this time. Alice Angel is introduced: a trigger-happy messenger that’s ended up in Hell. This also marks the year of JDS’s first color film.

1934 - With the addition of the Hays code, JDS holds back on all the violence, and produces less Bendy cartoons. Strangely enough, its reputation and income is barely effected. Alice Angel becomes the darling of the show around this time.

1936 - JDS releases a feature-length on the return of Bendy. It becomes extremely popular. But at the same time an endemic of sickness spreads throughout New York for a few days. There are also reports of some theatres receiving completely corrupted canisters that have whole minutes blacked out, melting, or incomprehensible.

1937- Henry Stein leaves the company because of “creative differences”. The studio’s growth comes to a halt.

1937-1940 - Production slows on more Bendy cartoons, instead focusing on other series again. Employees start protesting for better treatment outside the studio.

1940-1943 - Employees of the studio start to go missing, along with other employees leaving in droves. All report sickness.

1944-1945 - The studio, again, advertises a new breakthrough. A few more cartoons come out, all focusing on Bendy. People near the studio report cold chills and auditory hallucinations for months upon end.

1946 - After a mass plunge into hysteria from people in the near vicinity of JDS for 3 hours, The studio goes completely silent. All people employed go missing. Many investigations are taken out under these disappearances, but all become cold cases. People that go in don’t come out. Eventually, the studio is demolished.

1963 - New animation released. Henry is told by Joey to record the old studio. Game events.

[mxtantrights]

famous dc! au (dick's version)

TRACK FOURTEEN (DELUXE VERSION): I'M YOUR MAN / GIVE A LITTLE BIT

It's Winter holiday time in Hollywood and nothing feels like the holidays. Maybe its the building feeling of homesickness inside of you, or the feeling of change in the air. The sun is out and its way hotter than you're used to this time of year.

You really miss the snow. You miss the snow angles you would pass by on the street. And the snowmen that were falling apart but made with love with scarves and carrot noses.

You've been dating Dick Grayson for six months now, and he's taken you by surprise at each turn. When you needed to take new head shots for another project you wanted to apply to he helped you out-meaning he offered to take you to a professional studio and drop twelve hundred dollars on you. You of course made sure that didn't happen and made him take the pictures himself.

Another time, he offered to shut down the aquarium to take you just because you were having a bad day. It was a really kind and generous offer but you couldn't imagine inconveniencing anyone because your boyfriend is Hollywood's heartthrob.

Today just felt different. It felt like you really didn't want to be in the state of California at all. And if you saw another palm tree you might throw up. That's why you've stayed inside your apartment all week. Dick has been over all week too but you can't keep coming up with excuses about why your skin hasn't seen the sun.

A knock on your bedroom door raps and you know it's him. You tell him to come in. The door opens and in walks your boyfriend. But it's strange. He's dressed in a coat and a scarf.

He has Haley in his arms. You sit up in bed with a confused look on your face.

"Dickie?" you ask.

"Yes darling?" he asks, teasingly.

"It's eighty nine degrees outside." you say.

Dick hums, "no I don't think it is."

"You're gonna faint from the heat." you counter.

Dick shakes his head, "It's actually snowing outside, so I don't know what you're talking about."

You look at him then. Maybe he's trying method acting? You get up from the bed and pull back the curtains, back facing the window ready to prove him wrong.

"I need you to look outside Dickie." you say.

"Oh I am." he says with all the confidence in the world.

You turn around to point outside to the green gras but your eyes are met with nothing but white. White? You pull open your window and stick your head out. It's still hot. But there's snow on the ground.

There's snow on the ground?

"What going on? Why is there snow on the ground? It's hot." you speak.

"I know you were missing home so I thought I'd bring a piece of it here." he explains.

Your whirl around all at once. Then you're running over to Dick. You wrap your arms around his neck and embrace him fully. Your legs wrap around him barely and he holds onto you.

"Thank you so much, you are the best person I've ever met and I can't believe you did this for me. You're the best, Dick Grayson." you gleefully say.

He hugs you even tighter.

"I know, I know. But I also promised the kids that they could come out in about twenty minutes so if you wanna make the first snow angel we have to go right now." Dick says.

You let go of him and run to your closet. Your hands push and pull the hangers and the clothing inside. That's when you realize you don't have any coats. It's California!

"I don't have a coat!" you shout.

"Oh you don't need it. It's artificial anyways." Dick says.

Then he's grabbing your arm and pulling you out of your apartment, down the steps and out into the backyard. You happily fall into the snow on your back and swipe your arms and legs.

Dick watches from above as the smile that he had missed this past week finally forms on your lips.

-

Dick thinks it can't get any better than this. He's got the warm sun on his skin, the water at his feet and the love of his life right by his side. He looks over at you, only to find you not there. He looks around frantically thinking he lost you.

But his eyes catch you at the bar talking to an older woman. Of course. You are so charismatic and charming. She's laughing at something you said and you're smiling at her.

You look over at him and his heart melts. You tell him that you're coming, he tells you not to rush. You turn back to your new friend.

Dick lets out a sigh of relief. He doesn't care what position he's in on the charts right now. Or if enough of his merchandise is selling. Or if the latest roll out is going as projected.

All there is to think about is you and the island sun.

"I made a friend!" you shout as you run over to Dick.

He laughs, "I can see that."

"That was fun. She wanted to paint us." you explain to him.

Dick looks at you with a funny look, "Naked?"

"No! She just liked how we looked against the sunset. She wanted to know if you'd be okay with it, so I came over to ask you." you wrap your arm around his waist.

He places a few kisses on your hairline, "I'd like it. Tell her yes."

He watches as you turn around and give a thumbs up. He can't help but smile at you as you do. For the first time, being in love isn't something he wants to shy away from or feels the need to be embarrassed about.

Love.

Huh.

"She also said she knew your dad." you speak up.

Dick is pulled out of his trance right then and there. He looks down at you with his full attention now. You look mildly confused why he seems to attentive.

"The woman back there? The woman you were just talking to?" he asks.

You nod your head, "Yeah but I mean, don't people say that all the time? How can you believe it's true?"

Dick looks back to see the woman again, but she's gone. Bruce has never told him anything about his first love and yet Dick feels like the universe doesn't leave room for coincidences.

He turns back to you, "I could always ask him when we get back. He's due to tell me some stories from the past anyways."

"Aw, that's sweet. Maybe we can find your dad someone!" you smile.

"Maybe..."

-

Dick sets the tea down on the table in front of him. His father, Bruce, comes walking around the table and sits next to him on the couch. He sets down his own mug on the table-coaster provided via Alfred.

"So, I think I ran into your first love while I was on vacation."

Bruce almost chokes on his drink. He looks over at his son slowly. Dick notices that Bruce has gone somewhat still. And not his usual still where he's still processing details and making observations and what not.

This was new.

He was unfocused. Fazed.

"What do you mean by that?" Bruce asks.

"I mean when I was on the beach, there was a woman there. She said she knew you." Dick explains.

Bruce sits up, his back straight like a board. He tries to look unfazed, like he's just passing the time with this conversation but Dick can tell this is probably one of the most important conversations he's had in a while. Or at least one that he's firmly committed to.

"Describe her." Bruce commands.

Dick can't help to wonder what the hell happened between the two of them. He's never seen Bruce so on edge before. Dick goes on to describe the woman he saw. With each detail that flies out of his mouth Bruce shuts his eyes, turns away, and shifts his body.

"Bruce what's going on? I thought you said that you didn't fail." Dick asks.

Bruce scoffs, "I said that to give you confidence. I failed, miserably and hard."

Dick slinks back into the couch. He lets out a breath of air and crosses his arms across his chest.

"Well, what are we gonna do?" Dick asks.

Bruce looks over at him, "What do you mean?"

"How are you gonna get the love of your life back?"

[writing-ca-ira]

HASARDER — PART 1

YJ/Teen Titans Dick Grayson x Reader

Prologue << MASTERLIST >> Part 2

Dick Grayson is no stranger to death, but that doesn’t make it any harder to deal with. As it turns out, however, the grieving process for you would prove to take an interesting twist when Tim calls him with some shocking news.

The reader is gender neutral.

Contains: civilian reader, mentions of death (your death), mentions of a dead body (your dead body), spoilers: you’re actually alive… kinda, I’m probably forgetting something.

“Does the hurt ever go away?”

“I wish I could say yes… but it will get better over time. For you. That, I can promise.”

Dick felt his grip on the picture frame get weaker and weaker. Had he not snapped out of his thoughts a moment sooner, it would’ve slipped out of his hands and clattered on the floor, shattering the glass in the process. The mere thought of that happening caused his stomach to churn, guilt eating away at his heart despite managing to avoid that outcome. To ensure the safety of the picture frame (well, more importantly, the photo within it), he gingerly placed it back in its rightful place on top of his nightstand, right next to his old digital alarm clock and bedside lamp.

You keep thinking..."If only I'd done something differently,” Bruce’s voice echoed in his head. “If only I could've...warned them." But there isn't anything you could've done. There isn't anything either of us could've done.

That conversation happened years ago; over a decade by now. Back when Dick was still processing the death of his parents, and when Bruce was there to help him through it. Despite the consolation those words provided in the moment, he never expected them to carry such weight throughout his life.

There isn’t anything you could’ve done.

His eyes drifted back to the picture frame. The photo within it was taken 4 years ago, during his sophomore year of high school at Gotham High. He still remembers the crisp autumn air against his skin, the red and orange leaves scattered on the ground, and the chocolate flavored milkshake he was halfway through. There was a giant smile on his face, his blue eyes sparkling with such joy and vibrancy.

It’s because you were right next to him.

The photo caught you mid-laugh, your eyes crinkling with happiness. You had haphazardly thrown up a peace sign with one hand while holding your own drink in the other. Though you were too busy laughing to notice, Dick had snaked his arm behind your head to give you bunny ears, which caused you to playfully throw leaves at him when you found out afterwards.

Thinking about that day still causes a fond smile to tug at his lips. Wally had to bail on their plans that day due to a date he forgot about with Artemis, so Dick found himself in the Cave to hand out with you instead. That’s how you two ended up walking around Happy Harbor — your idea, if he recalls correctly — exploring random shops and goofing around outside.

Had that really been 4 years ago?

Whatever warmness that flooded his chest while reminiscing on the past was immediately extinguished by the coldness of reality. It’s been 2 years without you now. The anniversary of your death was a week and a half ago, which was when he found himself so filled with grief that he could barely even get out of bed. It took all of the senior members of the team to rouse him out of his depressive episode; much like the year before.

You were gone. He still wasn’t used to saying that. Even with the time that’s passed since you died, he can feel his heart drop whenever he thinks about it, as though he’s learning about your death for the first time. The tears still wouldn’t stop, and neither would the nights filled with feverish dreams of your face.

If only I could’ve done something differently.

Of course, Bruce was right all those years ago; there wasn’t anything he could’ve done. Much like with his parents, Jason, and now the recently deceased Tula (all whom he still has nightmares of to this day), there was logically nothing he could’ve done to save you. He was all the way in Santa Prisca leading a covert mission when he received a distress call from your phone in Happy Harbor. All he could do was make sure someone was en route to your coordinates — which led to the Happy Harbor boardwalk — and pray you were safe.

But by the time Aquagirl and Tempest got there, it was too late.

Learning about what happened to you was hard for Dick. The ringing in his ears blocked out every sound except for his own shaky breaths, and he could barely even stand without feeling dizzy. But he managed to fight through his state of shock and despair to listen to the report. You were caught in a domestic dispute gone deadly at the Happy Harbor health clinic. A man stormed into the clinic to take back his kid from his ex-wife, who was there for a check-up. Things escalated, and the man shot and killed his wife, threatening the doctor in the room if she didn’t let his son go with him.

You happened to be in the next room over. Hearing the gunshot must’ve made you spring into action, making a 911 call along with the distress call to the team. The doctor that was with the son said that you snuck up behind the man and lunged at him, yelling at her and the kid to run. There was signs of a struggle in the room, but you unfortunately weren’t the one to walk out of there alive.

The man was neutralized by police around 3 to 4 minutes after your estimated time of death. If you hadn’t had your scuffle with him, it’s possible that he could’ve grabbed his son and escaped before the cops arrived. Your face was on the news after that, journalists proclaiming you to be a hero that sacrificed their life.

Except you should’ve never had to in the first place.

It’s not fair, Dick decided. Why did you, the one who wasn’t supposed to be risking their life, have to die because of some other people’s marital problems?! You weren’t even a hero; you were just a normal civilian going about your daily life. So why did you have to die like this?!

Even thinking about it caused his eyes to sting from frustrated tears, his jaw tightening as his fists clenched at his sides. If that guy wasn’t shot down by the cops, lord only knows what Dick would’ve done to him. The fact that he couldn’t even see justice for your death — your murder — get delivered also feeds into his anger. God, why couldn’t he just be there to at least get justice for you himself?!

Justice and revenge aren’t the same thing.

God, he hated it when Bruce was right.

There was nothing he could’ve done. There was nothing anyone could’ve done. Everything happened to fast; from the man barging into the clinic, to the shouting between him and his ex-wife, to the gunshot, to you calling 911 and sneaking up on the man, to the struggle that happened for a solid minute or so, to the gunshot that ultimately ended your life. All of that happened in under 10 minutes, according to the timeline, and that just wasn’t enough time for someone to come help you.

“There isn’t anything you could’ve done,” he had to solemnly tell Tula and Garth, who were both blaming themselves for not being there. Tula Zeta’d in from Atlantis, while Garth had to go on foot from Mount Justice. They were the only ones who weren’t on a mission at the time; the only ones who could respond to your distress call. But no matter how fast they moved, they just couldn’t be there in time.

A buzzing noise snapped him out of his thoughts. It caused enough surprise to him that his shoulders jolted upwards, his heart completely skipping a beat. He soon realized that it was his phone buzzing. Someone was calling him.

Shakily reaching for his phone (which was unceremoniously tossed onto his bed), he held it closer to his face to read the caller ID. Ah, Tim. It was a bit unusual for his successor to give him a call (he was a bit too socially awkward for that), but anytime he did, it would make Dick feel special. In fact, maybe a conversation with Tim would help clear his head a bit.

He cleared his throat as a small test for his voice, then hit accept and held the phone up to his ear. “Hey, Tim. What’s up?”

“Dick—! I… it’s—” Panic was evident in Tim’s voice. Hearing his shaky words on the other end caused Dick’s brows to furrow. At first, he thought that there was something going on with Batman and Robin, but he remembered that it was Tim who called Dick, and not Robin who called Nightwing. So, did that mean something happened at the Manor?

“Tim,” Dick softly began, though with slight urgency in his tone, “is everything okay?”

“They’re… I’m— I don’t…” an uneven puff of air could be heard before the teen tried again. “I’m really sorry, Dick, I didn’t mean to poke around!! It’s just that Ba— Br— B had been spending so much time away from the Manor and the Cave, and I wanted to know what he was doing, a-and I used the Bat Computer and found the file about everything, and— a-and…!!”

Dick had to raise his voice a bit to interject. “Tim!! Tim, calm down… what are you talking about? What’s wrong?”

For a moment, all Dick got was a shuddery breath as a reply. Before he could repeat his question, however, Tim finally responded. “Don’t… don’t get your hopes up, alright? Promise me you won’t get your hopes up.”

“… Okay,” Dick decided after a moment of hesitation. “I won’t.”

There was a long pause. Anticipation and apprehension was building up in Dick’s chest, his heart thumping against his rib cage. It seemed as though Tim was trying to carefully choose his words; trying to find the best way possible to break whatever news he had.

But nothing in the world could prepare Dick for the next few words that came out of Tim’s mouth. “There’s another (Y/N).”

Everything in Dick’s body stopped working.

From his heart to his mind, his hearing to his vision, Dick felt as though he was shutting down. He almost let the phone slip out of his hands entirely, the blood in his veins feeling cold as ice and causing his limbs to tremble. Even trying to get air in his lungs was a tough task, despite his mouth hanging open. The room was spinning for him, and the ringing in his ears almost blocked out Tim’s panicked ramblings entirely.

There’s another (Y/N).

What…

What did he mean by that?

“I-I know how close they are to you, Dick,” Tim practically wailed. “I know how close they are to the team… I didn’t know that Bruce was hiding this from you— I-I-I don’t even know if I should’ve told you… oh, god, Dick… is Bruce going to fire me—?”

Dick swallowed thickly, hoping to get rid of the lump in his throat. Despite his tongue feeling like sand, he spoke up anyway. “What do you mean by another (Y/N)?”

Tim sputtered out something completely incomprehensible to Dick. It was hard to tell if the poor kid was scared of what he knows, scared of Bruce finding out, or scared of both. Either way, Dick knew that he wasn’t going to learn anything from Tim in this state. He bit the inside of his cheek before dawning the most imperative voice he can muster in the moment.

“Tim,” he lowly chided. “Give me a report.”

That got Tim to his frantic rambling of nonsense. Getting him to think of this like a mission debriefing would calm him down, Dick figured. And, from the deep breaths the former Robin could hear on the other end, he knew he was right.

“Someone was taken in by the police a week ago,” Tim started, his cracking voice taking a factual tone. “Said their name was (Y/N) (L/N). Cops ran that name through their database and found (Y/N)’s death certificate. This (Y/N) was confused, ‘n started saying weird stuff about… something called the Titans.”

“Titans,” Dick echoed. It was meant to be a question, but came out more as a statement.

Tim hummed. “Titans. A… supposed team of young superheroes, o-or something. I don’t know, the report didn’t really…” he trailed off, possibly realizing he was rambling again. “Tests were ran. Their DNA is an exact match to the real (Y/N)— but when they… they checked (Y/N)’s grave a-a couple of days ago…”

The thought of someone digging up your grave made him clench his teeth together. They went through with something like that and he didn’t even know? Who gave them permission?!

Probably Batman, he bitterly thought.

“They’re still there, Dick,” said Tim. “(Y/N)’s body is still there. But this other (Y/N) is an exact copy..!!”

Dick’s freehand was digging into the flesh of his other arm. “Cadmus?”

“Isn’t involved.”

“How do you know for sure?”

“No biological trace of Cadmus’ synthetic enhancements in this (Y/N)’s bloodstream. No psychic trace of Genomorphs in their mind, either. This (Y/N)…” Tim struggled with his words for a moment, “is natural. Genuine.”

Genuine. Dick couldn’t believe what he was hearing. There was another version of you walking this earth, supposedly confused about your own death, and Batman was planning to hide this from him? No, even worse, Bruce was planning to his this from him?!

No biological trace… no psychic trace…

All of these people to run tests, and yet he still didn’t know?

“Send me the file,” he monotonously demanded.

There was a small pause on the other end before Tim’s fragile voice spoke up. “What… are you going to do?”

“… I don’t know,” Dick answered, a tired sigh escaping his lips. It was an honest answer; what was he supposed to do after learning this? There was a (Y/N) alive out there, but not his (Y/N)…

“Are…” Tim trailed off, then tried again, “are you mad at me?”

“No—!!” Dick’s answer was quick. When he heard the sharp intake of breath on the other line, he realized that he might’ve spooked the poor boy, so he took on a softer tone. “No, Tim. It was good that you… brought this to my attention. Why would I be mad at you?”

“Bruce is going to be mad,” Tim practically whispered. “I shouldn’t of gone through his stuff… and… he would’ve wanted me to keep this all from you…”

Dick took a few moments to think of his response. “Well, you made the right choice telling me. He shouldn’t be keeping secrets like this in the first place.” Definitely not secrets that revolve around you…

“… ‘M sending the file now.” Distant clicking noises could be heard through the call, and then Tim followed up with, “I’m… sorry that Bruce didn’t let you know.”

“It’s not your fault, Tim,” was Dick’s soft reply. “He’s always been like that. Thinking it would protect us, or something.”

Protect us. The words were like acid on Dick’s tongue. Using secrets as protection always made Dick feel sick to his stomach. Looking at the past couple of years, Bruce’s secrets have done anything but protect others. They drove Dick away from him, they put Jason six feet under, and now…

God, why wasn’t Dick the first person to know about this other (Y/N)?

Maybe it was selfish of him to think that. He wasn’t your only friend, so the rest of the Team had just as much as a right to know as he did. But he still should’ve known. He should’ve been involved with the investigation; he knows you better than anyone. And Bruce knows this.

“You… gonna be okay?”

Tim’s voice pulled him back to reality. With a weak cough, Dick wet his lips and said, “yeah. I’ll be alright. Just gonna read over the file for myself and… figure out what to do from there.” An awkward pause, then he continued. “Thank you for this, Tim. Call me if anything else comes up.”

“Yeah… yeah, of course. I-I will.”

And, with that, the call ended.

His hand dropped to his side, the phone in his hand almost slipping from his grip. This couldn’t be real. None of this could be real. You were dead, yet… you were back. Someone with your face was out there talking about some other team… the Titans, and he was just now finding out about this.

After a week, he bitterly recalled.

Taking a final glance at the picture frame, his eyes scanned over your face. This new supposed (Y/N) wasn’t you. It couldn’t be you. The memory of your dull, lifeless face at the morgue still haunts him to this day, causing a chill to run up his spine and his hair to stand on end. Dick knows what death looks like, and you were, without a doubt, dead.

So, who was masquerading as his dead friend?

The answer seemed to be simple; you were masquerading as his dead friend. But… not you. Even if your DNA was an exact match, and Cadmus didn’t have any involvement, whoever you were, you weren’t his (Y/N). He’d like to believe that his (Y/N) would demand to see him, to assure him that you were still alive. You wouldn’t have let him go an entire week without knowing, leaving him to mourn someone that was still alive. As far as he concerned, this new (Y/N) was a stranger.

But, that just led him back to square one; who was this stranger?

Guess I’m about to find out.

[thornsnvultures]

memories (sweet like cocoa)

bucky barnes x fem!plus size!reader | 1.1k | cw: some non-specific body insecurities, slightly nsft but nothing too explicit (making out, clothes on grinding) | based loosely on this post (warning: link also slightly nsft) |

♡♡♡

Sitting snuggled up on the couch on a lazy Sunday afternoon with Bucky is your favorite thing to do this time of year. There's snow outside falling lightly and not quite sticking to the ground yet. Bucky's reading a book so well loved you can't tell what it says on the spine anymore, and you've got a movie playing on the TV, munching on popcorn and occasionally reaching over to pop a kernel between Bucky's lips. The two of you had tried tossing and catching with your mouths earlier but were laughably bad. The couch ate more popcorn than either of you.

Sometime after Bucky decides to take a break from his book and pull you into the crook of his arm, you get a notification from your photo app telling you it made another album of pictures from this day a few years back. Excited to take a walk down memory lane, back to the days when you and Bucky had first started dating, you tug on the sleeve of Bucky's sweater to get his attention.

"Aw Buck, look at how cute we are!"

Bucky smiles and presses a kiss to your temple as you scroll through the set of pictures from the date the two of you went on that day. There's a picture of Bucky with a whipped cream mustache from his mug of hot cocoa. A few wobbly ones of the two of you on skates at the ice rink. Your favorite is the one a lovely older couple took of you and Bucky stading in front of the massive tree in the middle of the rink. They were so sweet, talking about their own first dates at this same rink when they were young and new to love. You remember heat rushing to your cheeks, embarrassed because the two of you had only been dating for a few months and even though things were going great you were still afraid they wouldn't last. You look so nervous in that picture and you can't help but laugh.

"What's so funny?" Bucky's deep chuckle by your ear makes you shiver even when you're wrapped up in his warm embrace.

"Nothing, nothing," you laugh more as Bucky tickles your side under your sweater. His calloused hands stay pressed to your soft tummy even after you beg him to stop. "I was just thinking I look kinda constipated. I was focused so hard on not falling on my butt for the fifteenth time that day."

"You look beautiful. No matter how many times you flailed like a baby giraffe, you still looked beautiful."

"Hey!"

Bucky laughs, dodging more of your flailing.

"Wait, wait," Bucky nods his head at your phone still in the hand you weren't swinging at him with, "What are those pictures from?"

The slideshow must've kept playing while you were distracted. Now it was showing pictures you forgot you had taken. Pictures you had been too afraid to show Bucky at the time.

"Oh my god. Don't look- please- it's not-"

"Now hold on," Bucky grabs the phone from your hand before you can stop him, grinning like an idiot all while you frantically fight him for it. Bucky's basically got one hand holding you back as he casually flips through the slideshow of risqué pictures you had secretly taken for him years ago.

"Bucky," you whine, "is embarrassing."

"Why? Sweetheart, you look stunning."

Picture after awkward picture of you in a lingerie set you had bought just for him, trying to find the right angles, the right lighting. You had quickly gotten discouraged and lost confidence. But not before taking a few with your panties off, legs spread, a coy look on your face that screamed "take me now".

Bucky audibly swallows and clears his throat when he sees those. He locks your screen and puts your phone down on the coffee table. He's too quiet, you can take it anymore. With your head in your hands you slump back in the couch and away from Bucky.

"Oh, I can't believe you saw those. I can't believe I didn't delete them."

"Baby, c'mere."

You shake your head even as Bucky's strong hands pull you into his lap. With your thighs on either side of his, it's impossible not to know how he feels about those pictures. If you weren't so mortified you'd be getting more familiar with the hard, thick length of him pulsing beneath you.

"Look at me, baby." One of Bucky's big hands rubs your back while the other pries your hands from your face. "My beautiful, sweet, sexy girl. Hiding those from me for all these years. I should put you over my knee for keeping those pretty presents from me."

You can't help but let out a choked laugh at that and Bucky smiles as he tries to meet your gaze.

"I just wanted to do something nice for you," you shrug, playing with the hem of Bucky's sweater, the tips of your fingers teasing dangerously close to where Bucky's yearning to be touched. "You did so much for me, took such good care of me, Buck," he shudders when your perpetually cold hands slip under his sweater to caress the bumps and ridges of his toned stomach, "but I chickened out. Was afraid you wouldn't like what you saw. Which I know was silly now, but we were still so new."

"From the moment I saw you, I knew there was no one else," Bucky pulls you in close by the nape of your neck until your noses are practically touching. "You're it for me, and I'll always be here to take care of you."

You sigh into his kiss, rolling your hips over his, savoring the pressure and the taste of his lips. They taste like hot cocoa just like they did when he kissed you good night at your door that night. He had work in the morning and couldn't stay. That's when you had the idea to take the pictures, give him something to remember you by until you saw each other again.

"So you really liked them?"

Bucky's got that cheeky grin on his face, trying to catch his breath after nearly devouring you.

"Sweetheart, I love them. I want them framed. I want them in a book to put on this coffee table. Maybe not all of them, some of these are for my eyes only." He stops his excited rambling to kiss you hard, pulling back again to ask, "You still got that Polaroid camera, baby?"

"Yeah, why?"

You squeal and shout as your massive man stands up with you still wrapped around your waist and carries you off to the bedroom.

"I got some new pictures I wanna take."

[harlowsbby]

A fluff : Jack and the reader instantly hitting it off. When they meet in the airport waiting on their delayed flights.

Open Arms

Having your flight delayed a few hours before you were supposed leave wasn’t exactly ideal or how you wanted to spend New Year’s Eve.

You were meant to be back home in Louisville right about know you sighed and scrolled through your apps on your phone before opening up Instagram, you smiled sadly seeing all of your friends posting videos of them getting ready for the party that was tonight.

Every year on New Year’s Eve your friends and you always went up to the big four bridge and watched the fireworks go off.

You looked around the airport and huffed seeing all of the flight attendants just laughing and joking off it didn’t seem like they were in such a rush to get home nor did it seem like they were even doing anything.

“This is the last time I fly delta.” You mumbled under your breath.

“And why is that? Delta is the best airplane to fly for.” You jumped slightly hearing someone’s voice from behind you, looking up you noticed it was a man but you couldn’t exactly see his face he had his black hoodie up and tied around him pretty good and he had sunglasses to cover his face as if he was hiding from someone.

“Who are you?” You asked and watched how he sat down from across you. “Oh I’m Jack.”

“Oh well in that case Jack why are you sitting next to me when there is millions of other seats here.” He laughed, it was something about his laugh that had your stomach doing an entire 360 you didn’t even know this man but he was already having some type of affect on you.

“I mean it seems like we’re the only two in this airport so why not try and make a little friend, where are you headed?” You wanted to lie and make up where you were going but something about him just gave off this friendly and not creepy type of killer vibe.

“I’m going back home to Louisville I was supposed to be there later on today for New Year’s Eve but looks like I’ll be spending it in the airport.” You expressed sadly.

“You’re headed to Louisville as well? So am I.” “Really?” He smiled and nodded “Yeah usually for New Year’s Eve we always watch the fireworks on the bridge.”

Was this man actually some type of spy or something. “Really? So do my friends and I it’s like some little silly tradition we made back in high school.”

“What else do you like doing for fun?” Jack asked you, you had to think about it for a second you didn’t really go out as much you honestly enjoyed staying indoors.

“Actually I don’t really get out like that it’s rare that you see me outside.” Jack was a bit taken back mainly because every single girl he’s met loved being outside.

“So you’re a what they call it a extrovert.” You giggled and shook your head no. “Do you mean a introvert? An extrovert is someone who loves spending time outside which I do not I’d rather be inside away from all the drama.”

“That’s a first half the girls I’ve dated loved going out just to be seen.” You gave him a confused look. “Why is that? What are you famous or something.”

“I mean you can say something like that.” He laughed and pulled his sweater up that’s when you then noticed the private garden ring on his finger and that’s when everything suddenly started to click.

The prada sunglasses he had on, his nose that was covered in freckles and the new unlimited new balance shoes he worn that only one person in this whole entire earth had.

“You’re Jack- you’re Jack Harlow.” You said in disbelief you couldn’t believe you were actually talking to Jack Harlow one of the biggest names in Louisville.

“That’s me so I guess you want a picture or something so you can post it online?” He frowned and it honestly made you feel guilty at the end of the day you knew Jack was a human just like you and wanted his privacy.

You have him a warm smile “Actually no I don’t want a picture but I’d love to finish up this conversation on the plane with you though.” Jack smiled “I’d love that.”

The entire flight home Jack and You were laughing and joking around you showed him a few videos of your friends and you when you were drunk and he showed you videos of different places he’s been while on tour.

“Wait wait so you’re telling me Urban can actually eat an entire pack of ramen noodles within minutes.” Jack laughed and nodded his head yes. “I mean not even within minutes I’d say within seconds he loves them so much.”

“That’s honestly insane if you ask me.” “If you think that’s insane you should see the way he’s quick to lose a girl.”

When your flight landed in Louisville you were a bit bittersweet about leaving Jack.

“So do you think I’ll be seeing you around?” He asked. “Hmm you can if you give me your number.” He smirked and pulled out his phone before handing it you and you quickly typed your name and number before saving it.

“I’ll see you around cutie.” “Oh so you’re giving me a nickname now?” You teased him Jack licked his lips and rolled his eyes. “Whatever Y/N I’ll see you around hopefully at the bridge later.”

“I’ll see you there Jack.” You gave him a wink before getting your suitcases. Later on that night you both indeed saw each other at the bridge and the rest was history, who would’ve thought you’d ever find love in an airport.

tag

@heavyhitterheaux @nattinatalia

@awhore4moree @softtcurse @moody4world

@mortirolo @hoodharlow @jackharloww

@jackmans-poison

[i9messi]

Hey, can you do a Haaland one where you break up but with a happy ending pls

A second chance — Erling Haaland

a/n: I hope you like it!!

word count - 1,5k

erling's masterlist

"I didn't believe in soulmates until I met you." Ironic. You said that to Erling the night before you two broke up.

Things had been good, Erling was a caring man who made you feel happy at his side. Until one day, you knew you couldn’t go on with that relationship anymore. The media didn’t know that Erling Haaland had a girlfriend, only your closest friends and family knew you were his girlfriend. And in the case of Erling’s family, only his parents knew. At first you understood that he wanted to keep the relationship private, because people could be cruel. However, after a year and a half of dating, you no longer liked anonymity.

You wanted to be able to have what other couples had: walk in the streets holding hands, take romantic pictures and post them on social media, and, above all, be able to say that you loved him in front of everyone. But for Haaland, it wasn't an option.

After so many discussions, you had left the issue aside, but that morning you saw that on social media they were talking about Erling and his new partner. Long story short, they had taken a picture when you had gone to take out the garbage together and believed that nobody was looking. Your face wasn't in the picture but it was you. You were kind of excited, because you thought this was the initiative to expose your relationship. So, the first thing you did was text your boyfriend.

"Babe, we need to talk."

Erling arrived about forty minutes later. And yet, after asking him what he thought, the footballer told you he didn’t think it was a good idea to make things public. That he was at the most important point in his career and everyone would do everything to blur him and bring out his weaknesses. You were his weakness. And for that reason, he couldn’t let the others know who he was dating.

You were tired of it. You wanted everything or nothing, and you let him know.

"Choose, Erling. I can’t keep doing this any longer. I want a real relationship."

"What we have is real, is real love."

"Real? We can’t go outside, we constantly are keeping others from taking pictures of us. None of your teammates know you’re not single. This is not real, it’s just an illusion."

And just like that, you decided to finish what you once had. It was a lie if you said you hadn’t thought about Erling. Something always reminded you of him. The cold reminded you of the way you curled up in bed and hugged his big chest, the times he warmed you with his hands. Manchester was feeling empty and incredibly cold without him.

However, one of your friends had invited you to a party, because he said you needed to get out of your comfort zone. According to him, you had to get over the breakup. Sometimes, you thought it would have been so much easier if you had fought, but the way you broke up with Haaland was peaceful and sad. You didn't have anger or hatred in your chest.

There you were, standing in one of your best dresses and having a nice conversation with a woman you’d just met. There were a lot of people in that house and unlike what your friend had told you, it was not something so casual. There were even familiar faces, some football players. You thought you heard his laughter, but it wasn’t possible, fate couldn’t be so cruel. You’d avoided going to his favorite places. There was no way Erling was there, you couldn’t stand it.

When you least imagined it, a person came along accompanied by the blond who had once been your boyfriend. You could feel your hands shaking. It was the first time you’d seen him in months and he still had the same effect on you.

"This is Erling Haaland."

A man introduced him and you acted like you didn’t know him, after all, that’s what everyone else thought.

"Nice to meet you, Erling," you said with the most fake smile you could put on.

"Don't do this."

You raised your eyebrows. There were people watching.

"What are you talking about?"

He swallowed saliva and there was an uncomfortable silence among all present. Erling said nothing more, but you could feel his gaze on you all the time. Having the one who had once been your boyfriend in front of your eyes caused a pain in your chest. You kept loving him.

"Sorry, I’m leaving. I have to get up early tomorrow," you told your friend, faking your excuse.

Moments later, you went outside and waited for an Uber. You heard a few steps approaching you.

"I’ll take you."

"Erling..."

You turned to see him, with his height it was impossible not to notice. He had his hair tied and he was well dressed, with a white shirt and black pants.

"It’s on my way."

"You and I both know that’s not true."

"My proposal still stands."

You let out a sigh, "Okay."

It wasn’t even five minutes, when you fell asleep in his car. Erling was looking at you and seeing your face lit up by the city lights. You just woke up when you felt some little touches on your shoulder. You saw his face, his eyes and his red lips. You also saw his blonde hair, some strands falling on his face. So many mornings you had woken up with that beautiful vision and you always ended up entangled in the sheets for a while. You've missed him, his smell, the vision, him.

"You have fallen asleep."

"Oh, I’m sorry. Are we there yet?"

You saw your home through the car window and you unbuttoned your seat belt. You didn’t know what to say, so you started opening the vehicle door.

"Wait."

"What?"

Erling held your hand.

"I want everything with you. There is no day that I do not regret what happened. I know I should have listened to you, that I should have understood what you wanted and understood you. I thought we’d always be together, together for life and now that we’ve been apart for the last few months... I don’t want to go on like this. I want us to be back, but this time I want everyone to know we’re together. I don’t want to hide it anymore."

"Do you want this now that you lost me?"

"I want to this because I love you. I love you as I never loved anyone and as I will never love anyone else. You said, we are soulmates."

You swallowed saliva. Tears fell from your eyes.

"Erling, this is complicated."

"Come see me at the next game, please, that’s all I ask."

"Okay, I’ll see you at the next game."

You looked at him one last time.

Manchester City’s game was over, giving Erling a superior win. He had made a hat-trick. The fans chanted the name of your ex-partner and being there gave you a feeling of nostalgia. Many times you had been there, but in a very different position. In the past, you had worn his jersey and no one had known what your relationship with the Norwegian was. In the present time, you saw him celebrate with the other City players, all happy for the big win.

But something was different this time. Erling looked for something or someone in the sea of people. Your ex-boyfriend found you. Erling Haaland walked up to the location you were in and you thought for a moment that he was addressing the fans, that he was surely going to give his jersey to some fanatic. Yet he stood in front of you.

"Give me a chance. to prove that I really want this. Just give me one chance."

"Erling..."

"I love you, I don’t know what I can do to prove it. I love you and I need you."

"Just kiss me."

You smiled. Your heart was melting. He kissed you, in front of all. You kissed him back, all the memories came back to your mind. You loved him, you loved him so much you could give him a second chance to make things right. People screamed and asked questions that you didn’t know how to answer. You focused only on Erling.

"Remember when we first met?"

Haaland remembered perfectly that day, he had it tattooed on his brain, he answered without hesitation, “Yes, of course. That was the day I fell in love with you. That exact day."

"I fell in love too. And it's something I can't change, no matter how hard I try. I love you, Erling. I love you so so so much that it hurts to not have you around."

"Could you give me another chance? I promise in front of all, in front of you, that my purpose is to make you happy."

"I'll give you another chance, just… don't break my heart."

"I won't. I can't wait to show everyone you’re mine.”

He kissed you again.

[kursedmayo]

I like to think that Leo didn't lose his arm or a part of his arm because it got caught in something or was getting infected by the Kraang and had to be cut off.

I now offer an even worse reason: he used it to feed someone, maybe even several people.

(TW: Blood, death, starvation and implied cannibalism)

Okay.

Picture this.

It's the fucking apocalypse. Food sources are running out everywhere.

You are Leo. You're young, handsome and inexperienced, but you're one of the most powerful people still alive to date. Leagues of people have put your lives in your hand, and you are trying your best to keep everything running smoothly.

You are on a rescue mission.

You were prepared. You accounted for every possible event and prepared for it. You were going to get survivors out of a recently discovered hidden shelter without alerting the Kraang, but the one thing you counted on never happening happened, and now everything went to shit.

Kraang discovered your team, shut down your ninpo, and destroyed your communication device. You lost one of your swords, people died, you got separated from your team, and the adults guarding the kids are missing.

You're fucked.

Day 1.

Isn't it hilarious? You were on a rescue mission, and now you're the one that needs rescuing.

You are still stuck in the shelter, underneath layers of concrete with scared children, all exits blocked. After almost being infected by Kraang, one of your arms isn't responding well to your commands. You suspect the nerves in it have been damaged somehow.

You try your best to assure the kids. It worked, naturally. They seem a bit more cheerful despite the situation.

Lying has always been your forte after all.

Day 2.

It's been 2 days. You don't know when you're going to get rescued, and the children are starving.

They are starving and have been starving for weeks, and now you're stuck with them, hungry and anxious. You've been told that despite the shelter's size and amount of rooms it wasn't supposed to hold this many people in the first place. The supplies are for maybe 6 people at most, enough for a family.

A rich family at that, perhaps, but it doesn't matter now.

What matters is that the supplies have long been running out. Scavenging can only do so much, and the people were counting on being rescued before they all died.

The youngest is five years old and looks thinner than they should ever be. The shelter is now quiet, the kids being too tired to cry.

Bored out of their minds, they just begin to talk- well, whisper more like it, about their dreams.

You keep quiet for now and listen.

One says they want to eat cake. Another says they want to play on the swings again. Someone pipes up and says they want to sleep on their own bed. A fourth kid says they wanna go back to school already.

Their friend jokes that not having to go to school was one of the only perks of being in the midst of an alien invasion.

They fight, you chuckle. Distracted, the shelter becomes a little more lively with discussions and discourse.

...An older kid wants to find their parents' bodies so they could give them a proper funeral.

A silence, but then it goes on.

They miss their brothers. They miss their sisters. They miss their aunts, uncle's, cousins, grandma's, grandpas- they miss the sun, they miss warm food, they miss fresh water, they miss the outside itself. They want to drink fresh water. They want to hug their grandma again. They miss being able to be loud and not have to worry about being found by the Kraang.

It's all "want". It's all "miss". Never "has", and if you fail, it might never be "will".

And guess what? It's all your fault. You dropped the key. You underestimated the Kraang. More than half of NYC is taken over already because of your mistake. It's all your fault.

...It's day 3.

The kids are getting desperate. You had to stop 4 kids from trying to eat chips of concrete, and some kids are so thirsty that they're biting their fingers and sucking on their own blood.

You have nothing to feed them. You have nothing to give them to drink. They're children, if this continues they're going to die hungry.

You can only hope help will arrive soon.

Day 4 arrives.

You can't even move your arm anymore. It's dead weight. What can the Medics back at the base even do? You don't even know why it stopped working. You're no technician, but you know enough to know Ultrasounds need energy that could be used somewhere else, and you sure as hell aren't worth the waste.

…

…You know Donnie would disagree.

Your entire family would.

You couldn't bring yourself to care.

Day 6.

You're desperate.

The shelter is deathly quiet. No one want to talk

anymore- or well, they can't. They have no energy left at this point.

They are definitely going to die of starvation if this continues.

You stare at your arm.

You stare at it hard.

You're desperate. They need to eat. They need to eat, now.

You don't need it anyways.

…But you shouldn't.

It's your right arm, there's still a chance the doctors can figure out a way to fix it. It's going to be awkward relearning how to fight with one arm. In a life of death situation, it's hard to be missing parts and even harder to make aids for it. Not to mention prions, and the whole being a mutant business, you don't know what will happen if a human ingests mutant flesh.

But….

You stare at the kids in front of you, empty eyed, hopeless.

...You shouldn't.

But you do.

You pick up a sword, and slash through bone and flesh. Pain smothers your vision, blood drips down and pools on the cold ground.

There was a hoarse scream. You ignore it. You make a makeshift torniquete and pick it up.

Through the haze of blood loss, you try to remember where to go. You go to the shelter's kitchen and begin to cook.

You'll remember the smell of your own burning flesh for the rest of your life.

However.

As fucked as it is…

It smells like relief.

They're going to live, you assure yourself, and for a while, it soothes your worries. This is the least you can do after all. This is the least you can do to atone.

For what it's worth, at the very least...

They're going to live.

[bloodanddiscoballs]

Alright I said I was gonna make a sappy post for my 30th birthday so here it goes!:

I never thought I would live to see 30. I know that many people say that, and I'm sure that sentiment isn't unique on here. Here's the thing; I'm disabled. I have almost died due to my health 3 times since 2011 and indeed did once before being brought back. My immune system is nonexistent, and my chronic pain has me at currently 6 reconstructive back surgeries and round the clock pain medication.

When I was 17 years old, I became a victim of medical malpractice and had my entire life changed in an instant. Didn't get to go off to college, didn't get to work normally, didn't get to move out - didn't, didn't, didn't. For years, I was told that I would heal. That I would be fine. I was young! Young people don't get sick. I'll bounce back. Just be patient. But I didn't get better, I got worse. And every year older was another year into my 20s where I wasn't able to do "the normal stuff." I never finished college, but I did get some classes done. I would work for a few months before needing to quit. I got married and then divorced. All "failures" due to my health.

At 27, I went to see my therapist and sat down and told her that I couldn't see into my future. I remember telling her, "Every day is hell. I can't do this for another 10 years. I've barely made it through this last 10. I don't even know if I can do it for another 3." I was at the end of my rope, convinced that I wouldn't make it. My back was crumbling underneath me again, and insurance was fighting me tooth and nail to be approved for another surgery. I was bedridden. I was on the highest medication load I've taken, and it wasn't even touching my pain. I wasn't connected to anything - not my art, not friends, not the world around me. I was looking very seriously at my options of what I thought was either suffering or dying.

So, she suggested a mindfulness program. It was a 6-week course at UCSD (University of California San Diego) that taught you how to. essentially, live in the moment. At first, I thought it was honestly the stupidest thing I'd ever heard. I'll admit that I was sour on it, but I said I would try it and I paid for the class so I did it. I sat through the meditations, wrote on the topics they gave, went through the exercises they instructed, and did the full day retreat. And at the end of those 6 weeks, I was alive again. I learned to savor every bite of my food. I learned how to pay attention to the sun on my skin. I learned to enjoy how it felt to have my air move in and out of my lungs. I learned how to look in the mirror and love what I saw and dress myself in what made me happy (this is when I started with the disco clothes). The warm feel of skin, the taste of my favorite soda, the beautiful way my cat purrs, the glorious smell of rain, the lovely way dust looks illuminated by the sun - I learned how to Live.

My life is still hard. My pain has not improved. I did get that surgery, so now my back is thankfully more stable than it's ever been. I know that I probably won't live a very long time compared to most, but none of that makes me sad anymore, not really. I have my bad days, and I have my good days, and no matter what, I live in the moment. I feel my emotions and let them have their space within me before letting them flow. And after over a decade of not touching my art because I felt like it was robbed from me, I paint now. I paint for myself, and I paint for others, and by God, I enjoy every second of it. I feed the little barn cats out in the back of where I live now, and I love them. I enjoy the sound of the wind through the oak trees, and I listen to my music, and I take pictures of the bugs. I watch the clouds race by when it's about to storm, and I talk to the flowers that grow outside my fence. I love my bed for holding me on my bad days and love that I have pretty artwork from friends hanging on my walls to comfort me when I can't leave my room. I dress up in my fun disco stuff whenever I can, and on the days I can't, I enjoy my soft, comfy pj's. I talk to my friends online every day and apologize for the days I can't when my pain makes it too hard to think. I play fun video games and watch good movies and enjoy fun podcasts. I Live.

Today, I am 30 years old. I have lived through what should have killed me many times over. And I am so, so happy I am here. And for however long I have, I will continue to live in the moment, enjoying the days and moments I can and allowing the bad to simply be bad. I plan for tomorrow because that is all I can plan for.

I live, and that is enough.

[mirisss]

As the Seasons Change Chapter 3

Chapter 3: The One Who Melted the Winter Cold Away

Summary: Throughout one’s life, you fall in love with many people, some will stay for a long time and some will be like a passing wind. As (Y/n) is cleaning to prepare to move, she finds some old pictures from when she was young and begins reminiscing on some old relationships she used to have. The memories, the laughs, the pain, they were all things she had to go through to find the love she has today. 

In this story, Woozi, Dk, and (Y/n) are the same age and Seungkwan is one year younger than them

(Y/n) is also shorter than all of them, ‘cause I am, and I don’t know how to write for tall people, 

Lee Seokmin x afab reader

Wordcount ≈ 12k (I really went overboard for this one, didn’t I?) 

Warnings: Sexual rumors, bullying, anxiety, breaking up, I think that’s it? 

Taglist: @jeonghansemotionalsupportsword

(Y/n)’s POV

The next stack of photos that I found made my heart feel warm. The most recent photos of my life. My college experience is summarized through these photos. The first couple of photos were of me and my family, my dorm room, some photos of the school, and just me standing outside of the school. And some with Seungkwan, they were taken when we were still together. When we still believed we could deal with the long distance. It hurt a little seeing these photos, the last time we were actually happy together. 

Looking at these photos, I remembered how lonely I felt at the beginning of college. For the first time ever, I didn’t have a friend to help me find more friends, I had to do it all alone. And it didn’t really work, not at first at least. 

The next photo in the pile made me smile, it was the true start to my college life, my first friend, who soon became my boyfriend thanks to one of his other friends. 

~ Flashback ~ 

Moving into my college dorm room was exciting, all the movies and stories showed that this would be the time of my life to study, party, explore love of different kinds, find friends for life, and much more. However, that’s not how it was in real life, at least not for me. 

Growing up, I always had Seungkwan to help me find friends, he was so outgoing and extroverted so making friends was very easy for him while I have always been more introverted and shy, so making friends hasn’t been my forte. 

This was the first time I had to do it all on my own, although it felt impossible, I wanted to try my best. I wanted these years to be filled with laughter and memories of more than just me being alone. 

Saying goodbye to my family and to Seungkwan was hard but I was excited to experience the adventure that college is. I went into my dorm room, and though I was worried about making friends I chose a single room, one I didn’t have to share with anyone, because I just couldn’t see myself sharing a room with someone I didn’t know. What if we don’t get along? What if she’s like a killer or something? Unlikely, but not impossible. My family and Seungkwan had helped me bring all my things into the room but nothing was unpacked yet. That was something I wanted to do on my own. 

I unlocked my phone and opened my music app, it had been a while since I last checked out Jihoon’s music but for some reason, his songs were exactly what I wanted to listen to right now. With the music playing, I began unpacking the things for my bed, pillowcases, and stuff. I kept going for a few hours until most things were unpacked. It would take a few days until I find the perfect spots for each little thing but eventually, this will feel like home. I made myself ready to go to bed, exhausted from unpacking and saying goodbye. I quickly fell asleep, the bed felt unfamiliar but weirdly comforting. 

The next morning, I woke up feeling anxious, this was the first chance I had to find a friend. That was my goal for now. One friend. Just one. Shouldn’t be too hard, right? I got dressed and went outside to find my way to the assembly for new students. 

Once I found the right assembly hall for my major, I went inside, 5 minutes until it began. I looked around, most people seemed to be talking with someone already, the few who weren’t were talking on the phone looking around trying to find someone, or waving their arms to other people who jogged over to them. I felt like I was the only one who was alone. I shook away the anxiety and continued walking, I found an empty place in the middle row, on the far right. My view of the stage wasn’t great but it would do. I tried to find an opportunity to say ‘hi’ or ‘hello’ to anyone around me, but no one seemed to even notice me. 

The assembly began, and it ended just as quickly. The assembly hall emptied out until I was the only one left. I felt like a lone flower that had been left on a field, watching as the other flowers were happily picked to be placed in hair or beautiful bouquets while I was left to wither alone. I walked back to my dorm room. Day one, total fail. 

After cooking dinner, I brought the food to my room and sat down on my tiny couch that barely fit in the room with my bed, table, and wardrobe. I Facetimed Seungkwan. Surely hearing his voice and seeing his face, would make this day better. 

“Hi (Y/n)!” “Hey, Boo, how’s your day been?” “It’s been good, Dino says hi too, he’ll be upset if I don’t say that. First day wasn’t that exciting, I mean, we know everyone and everything that happens here. How’s your day been though?” I looked down at my phone a little, Seungkwan immediately knew that something was wrong. “Well it was alright, I attended the assembly, and I made dinner. Nothing else happened,” “Did you talk to anyone?” “No,” I sighed. “I tried, I really did, Kwannie, but, everyone seemed to already have 1 or 5 friends,” “It’s okay, it was just the first day. You’ll find someone eventually!” We chatted for a few more minutes after that, until he had to go. I missed him. I missed his hugs and even if I hated it at the time, the way he would tickle me whenever I frowned to make me laugh. 

After finishing my dinner, I dejectedly went to bed. My excitement quickly washed away, being overtaken by anxiety and my low self-esteem. Throughout the rest days of the week, I attend my classes, I try to talk with people but I never manage to actually do it. One week has gone by, and I still don’t know anyone’s name. I haven’t spoken to anyone. Whenever my parents call I tell them that I am happy, that I’m having fun, I don’t want them to worry. Seungkwan, Shua, and Wonwoo are the only ones who know how I am actually feeling. Minghao kind of knows, he figured I wasn’t telling him everything when he visited me on Wednesday. It was a surprise witness because he was here to buy a book from someone. It was nice seeing a familiar face, yet it also reminded me of how lonely I am. 

Seungkwan came over for the weekend, he came early on Saturday morning, I showed him around the campus. I was happy to have him around again but even after just a week apart, it didn’t feel like how it used to feel. Hugging him and kissing him, felt unfamiliar, like he wasn’t the boy I had grown up with and been together with for the last years. I saw it in Seungkwan’s eyes that he too felt it. This weird feeling. This distance between us. I tried pushing it away, I tried to imagine that everything was perfect, like it used to be. 

Almost a month had gone by, and I had still been unable to find a single friend. Seungkwan and I went from calling each night, to texting throughout the day, to a single text every day, to a text every other day. I was busy with classes, he was busy with classes and his friends. The distance that we felt that first week was only growing larger and larger. At this point, it felt wrong to say that we were in a relationship. Shouldn’t we yearn to speak with one another if we were in love? Yet, I wasn’t feeling as devastated at the lack of contact as I probably should have been. Did this confirm what I thought when Jihoon and I broke up? That long distance was impossible. 

That weekend, I was going home to visit my parents. I was also going to talk with Seungkwan. I wanted to break up. I had talked to Minghao about it first, he felt like the best one to ask. He told me that if I was even thinking about breaking up without talking to anyone, then that is what I must do because, in my heart, I knew that I had lost feelings for Seungkwan. The advice was so simple but it truly did help me. As long as I had known Minghao, he had always been a boy, now a man, who used simple words, yet they held so much meaning. 

The talk hurt but it felt good to know that Seungkwan felt the same. Maybe we could find each other in the future again. I knew this also meant that our friendship would change, but maybe that could be healed with time. After all, everyone always says that time heals all wounds. 

When I returned to college it was time for a camping trip. It was a tradition that had been going on for over a decade. The first years would be put into groups and sent out with a teacher to different camping grounds to compete against each other in trivia and activities. I had decided that this was my last chance at making a friend. If I don’t manage after this trip, then I’ll give up. I might even move to the same college Minghao is at. Hao had told me not to because this was my dream college, but I’d hate to spend four years alone. 

I packed my bag with everything I needed for the camping trip, it would be 4 days and 3 nights. I was happy to hear that I got one of the better locations. It had a beautiful lake, while some people were camping in locations that felt like the backyard of a house. Or that was what I heard others saying as I walked past them. 

However, there was one problem with my camping trip. Not the location, the group. Most groups had an even amount of girls and boys, so everyone could pair up 2 and 2 or 4 and 4 for the tents. Yet with my group, there were 5 girls and 5 guys, and we only had 2-person tents, so 1 girl and 1 guy would have to share a tent, which isn’t really that bad if the guy was nice. The worst thing about it was that the four other girls made the decision for us, the four of them were best friends so of course they would share tents, and that left me. The teacher apologized for this mishap but everyone said that it was fine. Even I did, though I was terrified. 

I went over to the teacher, telling him that I was the one who would share the ‘coed’ tent. He smiled a little knowingly, he knew that it wasn’t exactly by free will. “Alright, (Y/n), this is Seokmin, Seokmin, this is (Y/n), for these three nights you will share a tent and you will be a team for the activities,” A tall boy with sharp and handsome features, and a smile as bright as the sun, stepped forward, hand out toward me, expecting me to shake it. I shyly put my smaller hand in his larger one, he energetically shook it. “Hi, I’m Seokmin, you can call me DK though if you want!” “Hi, I’m (Y/n),” “Come on, let’s build our tent, I hope you know how to, because, well, I don’t,” 

Seokmin was radiant like a sun, he was energetic and kind. He was the human equivalent of a golden retriever. For the first time in a few weeks, I genuinely smiled, his smile and energy were contagious. Maybe this wasn’t so bad after all. Could this have been it? Could I maybe become friends with this guy? 

It took almost an hour and then help from some of Seokmin’s friends, Mingyu and Jeonghan, until we managed to finish our tent. “Thanks, guys, I guess my teammate and I will have to hope we do well on the trivia ‘cause the practical things, well, they’re obviously not our thing,” “It’s fine, it took us a while to figure it out too. By the way, I’m Jeonghan and this is Mingyu, over there by the water is Vernon and some other guy we don’t really know,” Jeonghan said. His smile was friendly, yet a little mischievous, half angel half devil looking. Mingyu was quite tall, yet he too seemed like a golden retriever. I hadn’t met Vernon yet but I assumed he was nice too seeing as these three were. 

“So, (Y/n), you from here or just here for the university?” “Just for uni, though I’m not from too far away. It takes about 2 hours to drive between uni and my town,” “Cool, which town are you from?” As we were packing up our pillows and stuff, Seokmin started a conversation. “I’m from (wherever). What about you? Just here for uni or?” “Wait, you’re from (wherever)? I’m from there too!” “Really?” “Yeah! I lived on the south of the town, went to Pledis High,” “Oh, I lived on the north side of town and went to Hybe High,” “That’s so cool, we’re from the same town and now we’re here at the same uni!” “Yeah, that’s kind of cool,” Talking with Seokmin felt like talking to an old friend I had known for years. 

“How come you ended up being in this tent?” “Well, we thought that for the sake of the girl, we would choose the most easy-going guy, and like the least intimidating. I mean Mingyu is a sweetheart but he can seem scary at times, Jeonghan is nice too but he has a bit of a reputation for being mischievous, Vernon is well he’s Vernon, he doesn’t talk too much unless you find a topic he likes, the fourth guy, I don’t even know his name, but he too seemed a bit more reserved so that left me,” “That’s so sweet of you guys, thinking about the comfort of others,” Seokmin smiled and gave me two big thumbs up. 

“How did you end up in this tent?” “I kind of don’t know anyone here, and the other four girls are best friends so the decision was made without my consent, but I don’t really mind, especially now that I have met you, feels like I maybe just made my first friend in college,” “What? How come you don’t have any friends?” I looked down at my hands, a bit ashamed. “All my life I always made friends through my childhood best friend, he’s like super extroverted, and I’m, well, not. So, he always made the connection, and then by association, they became my friends too,” “Well, anyone who doesn’t want to be friends with you is stupid, you seem like a really cool girl,” “Thanks, DK,” 

Too soon, the trip was over. I couldn’t be happier as I had made 4 new friends, Seokmin, Mingyu, Jeonghan, and Vernon. Even if I didn’t share a class with any of them, everything felt better as I wasn’t alone anymore. 

~ End of flashback ~ 

I looked at some of the photos from the camping trip. My favorite was probably the one that Vernon took of me and Seokmin during one of the nights. We had built small fires and sat around them in groups. In this photo, Seokmin was on my right as we shared a small log to sit on, we both held a stick in our hands, two burned marshmallows on them, and we were laughing after Mingyu had dropped his stick in the fire. My smile was brighter than ever in the photo, my eyes seemed to have found a sparkle that I hadn’t ever seen before in myself. Seokmin was laughing just as much, his smile as bright as the sun. His gaze was focused on me rather than the disappointed Mingyu who was in front of us, I don’t think I’ve noticed that before. The way he looked at me, resemble the loving gazes you’d see in a romance movie. Maybe we both fell in love that night, maybe we didn’t. 

There was another photo from that trip that I loved. It was a group picture of myself, Seokmin, Mingyu, Jeonghan, and Vernon. I was standing in the middle of the tall boys, all of us smiling, Seokmin had his arm around my shoulders, we were all looking at the guy taking the picture, and right as he took the picture, all the boys pulled funny faces without me knowing. I didn’t find out until after the trip when I was given the stack of photos from Jeonghan as the pictures were all taken on some old camera the fourth guy, whose name was Sangyeon I learned a bit later, brought with him. 

~ Flashback in third person POV ~ 

When the next week of classes began, (Y/n) woke up feeling excited and confident. On Sunday, Jeonghan came over with the pictures from the trip, he also brought some snacks with him. (Y/n) gave him a container with some food, during the trip she had told the boys about this stew she usually makes and they all wanted to try it so she prepared some for them. 

As she walked into her class, she sat down, she noticed people staring at her and whispering, but she didn’t think too much about it. She felt this way most days. Like everyone was whispering about her, staring at her because she’s the weird loner-girl without friends. Today, it felt more intense but (Y/n) tried to ignore it, leaving it to be her own anxiety demon eating away at her newfound happiness and confidence. 

After her first class, the group of girls who had been at the same campsite as (Y/n) came up to her. “How was it?” (Y/n) was confused, “How was what?” The girls snickered and glared at her with nasty looks in their eyes. “You know, throwing yourself at Seokmin and the others,” “I didn’t, what? What do you mean?” “Don’t play innocent now, everyone knows that you practically begged Seokmin to sleep with you, to kiss you, because you’re so lonely,” (Y/n) took a step back. Had Seokmin said these things? “I didn’t throw myself at him. I didn’t do any of that,” “Hmm, it probably didn’t work, not even Seokmin is kind enough to sleep with you,” 

(Y/n) was so hurt by the encounter that she ran home to her dorm, skipping the rest of the day. She was smart enough to skip one class without falling behind, she could keep up. Her phone dinged with messages every now and then, she knew from whom. She had assigned special ringtones to all of her friends so that she knew who was messaging her. In the last 3 hours, it had been 17 messages from Seokmin, 11 from Jeonghan, 8 from Minghao, 2 from her mom, and 1 from Vernon. She only answered Minghao and her mom. 

Most of Minghao’s messages had been pictures of clothes, some for himself but also some that he thought would look good on (Y/n). She agreed, everything looked great. Her mom was asking about the camping trip, she only answered that it was fun, and sent some pictures of the lake. 

It wasn’t until the next day that she checked what Seokmin, Jeonghan, Vernon, and even during the night, Mingyu had wanted. They had asked about eating lunch together, joining them for a movie night on Wednesday, eating dinner together, if (Y/n) was okay, if something had happened, and some other similar topics. 

She left them all on read and got ready for classes. When lunch arrived, she wasn’t prepared for the fact that Seokmin was waiting outside the door of her class. He pulled her aside the second that he saw her. “Woah, oh, hey, Seokmin,” “Hey, is everything okay? You didn’t answer any of my messages yesterday and you left me on read this morning?” (Y/n) sighed. Shouldn’t he know what’s wrong? He’s the one who spread those rumors. It has to be, right? Right? 

“I don’t know,” Was all she could say. She didn’t want to actually accuse him of creating and spreading the rumors, what if she was wrong? She didn’t want to lose her first friend because of that. “Something must have happened, two days ago you answered like normal but now you’re not answering at all, have I said anything? Have I done anything to hurt you? If so, please tell me because I want to apologize for it,” Seokmin stared down into (Y/n)’s eyes with an intensity she had never before experienced. “Did you spread some rumor about the trip, about us at the trip?” (Y/n) searched his face, wanting to find any clue that would show her that he hadn’t done it. She was happy to find that he looked confused. 

“What? No, of course not, I haven’t said anything other than that the trip was fun and I was happy to make a new friend,” (Y/n) looked away, a bit ashamed. Of course, he didn’t do it. “The other girls at our campsite told me yesterday that the whole school is talking about me, the lonely girl who threw herself at the poor guy who had shared a tent with her… They said that I apparently begged you to sleep with me and kiss me,” Seokmin’s eyes held so much sympathy yet his jaw clenched in what (Y/n) could only assume to be anger. 

“I would never say those things, nor would the other guys, we all have sisters and we would hate it if someone did something like that to them. I’m so sorry, it must be awful having to hear people say that about you,” Seokmin gently wrapped his arms around (Y/n), slowly swaying them around as he tried to comfort her, trying to show her that he was innocent. “Thank you, and I’m sorry for jumping to the conclusion that you had created the rumor,” “It’s okay, I probably would have thought that way too, but hey, we know it’s not true and people will see it too,” 

Seokmin’s heart was racing in a way it had never done before. It started during the trip, the very first time they saw each other, the way her small hand felt in his larger hand, the curve of her lips when she smiled, the sparkle in her eyes. Seokmin understood now, that he had fallen in love with her at first sight. He liked (Y/n), more than just a friend. He was ecstatic to finally have her back, even if they didn’t speak for just one day. As he released the hug, he glanced down at her lips, her lips finally curving back into her gorgeous smile, Seokmin wanted to kiss her, so he did. 

On the forehead though, he managed to find some self-control in the last second. (Y/n) blushed as red as a tomato after the action. Her heart skipped a beat. “So, how about that movie night?” “It sounds lovely, of course, I wanna come,” “Great! Bring pajamas, or even better, just come in it, you can stay the night too, our movie nights tend to drag on quite late, so it’s better if you stay and go home in the morning instead of in the middle of the night,” “Are you sure that I can stay over? Won’t it be crowded?” “Nah, Jeonghan, Mingyu, Vernon, and I all share an apartment. There’s even an extra room, it’s made for five people to share. It was a bit nicer than getting a dorm and we would know who we’re sharing with,” “Woah, that sounds so nice,” “We should go or we’ll miss lunch, but hey, send me a text with your favorite snacks and I’ll make sure we have them for tonight, and I’ll text you the address, just call me or the other’s if you have any questions,” 

The two said goodbye and went to eat lunch separately, mostly because their next classes were on opposite sides of the campus so eating lunch together today wasn’t convenient. 

When (Y/n) got home that day, she packed a small bag with things she would need for the trip while also calling Joshua and Wonwoo. She needed advice on whether or not she should allow herself to like Seokmin or try to suppress her feelings that were slowly coming to life. 

“Please help me, or I am going to die,” Joshua laughed loudly at (Y/n)’s panicked expression while Wonwoo tried to look around in the background of the Facetime call to see if there was an actual danger present. “What’s up? Haven’t heard from you for a few days, other than seeing some photos of that lake,” Joshua asked. “Well, I have officially made actual friends. Four guys, Seokmin, Jeonghan, Mingyu. and Vernon. They’re all from the same town as us, though from the south. I got to know them on the trip,” “Ohh, finally. Congratulations, our little girl has finally grown up!” The two boys teased, “Ya! be nice or I’ll call Hao and Coups instead,” “hey, we’re your number 1 boys, anyway, why are you almost dying?” (Y/n) began explaining everything that happened, what they did on the trip, the rumors, the connection with Seokmin. 

“Kind of sounds like you’re in love, or at least like you have a crush on the guy,” Wonwoo said, pushing his glasses back up higher on his nose after they had slipped down. “I think that’s her problem, right?” Joshua said. He had always been good at understanding (Y/n), not as good as Seungkwan had but Shua was very close to it. “Mm,” (Y/n) just mumbled as she hid her face in her hands. “Look, if you like him, that’s okay, nothing has to happen. I’m sure you are scared that you will lose him and the others if you date him but you don’t know that for sure,” “You didn’t lose us or Jun, or Minghao, or Chan, or Seungcheol, even if you dated and broke up with Jihoon and Seungkwan,” Wonwoo added, matter of factly after Joshua. 

“Thanks, guys, I’ll try to come and visit you next week or so,” “Sounds good, have fun tonight, and whatever the clock is, if you need us, just call, okay?” “yeah, same for you guys, bye, love you!” (Y/n) felt better after talking to her two best friends. She finished packing her things and began heading over to Seokmin’s place. 

~ End of flashback, in (Y/n)’s POV ~ 

The next few photos were from the movie night. The first movie night that I spent with Seokmin and the other three boys. 

The first couple of photos were of the apartment itself, it was really nice. Not too far from the university, the windows on one side of the apartment overlooked a beautiful garden filled with trees and flowers while the other side overlooked a part of the city. 

The apartment was filled with different styled decor. Considering that the four boys had different styles, it was bound to be a bit chaotic but it also felt very homey. Anywhere you looked you’d find pieces of their personalities, each item a staple of one of the four boys who lived there. 

I remember them having a large framed picture in the kitchen, the picture was of all four of them at their high school graduation, they were all smiling widely, their clothes soaked from the rain that had just washed over them, you could see their old school in the background, and in the bottom part of the frame they had written a short text “The start of Forever”. It was cheesy, very cheesy but it kind of went well with the picture. 

Most people would see the high school graduation as the end of an era but they chose to see it as the start of something instead, they intended to stay friends, I sort of wished I had taken a photo of my friend group when we graduated, but we could always take one now. Though, it wouldn’t be the same. And my friend group is so different now from what it was. 

The next few photos were of the boys, Mingyu was holding a tray filled with snacks, I remember his hands shaking from the weight of it despite his built frame. Jeonghan was making iced americanos for all of us in the kitchen, he was also shouting Vernon’s name for him to come and help carry the drinks, the photo was a bit blurry because he was moving around so much. Finally, there was a photo of Seokmin who was sitting on the couch, the TV remote in his hand as he was choosing the first movie for the night. The next photo was the one with the worst quality of all photos in my collection. It was a group photo taken in selfie mode by Mingyu. I was sitting in the middle of the sofa, squashed between Seokmin who had his arm thrown around my shoulders and his face squished up against my own, Jeonghan on my other side giving me bunny ears (though you could barely tell), Vernon was kneeling on the floor in front of Jeonghan, and Mingyu was half kneeling in front of Seokmin and myself with one of his arms stretched out as far as he could to fit us all in the frame causing him to be shaking a little, hence the bad quality. The photo, however, was one that we all found incredibly precious. 

~ Flashback in (Y/n)’s POV ~

I sat down on the sofa beside Seokmin, who turned and smiled at me before he continued searching for the perfect movie to start the night. Soon enough, the other three boys joined us by the tv. “Oh, let’s take a group photo with your camera, (Y/n)!” I looked at Mingyu who was literally jumping with excitement. “I mean, we can try but I don’t know how it will turn out,” I answered a bit shyly. Mingyu grabbed the camera and kneeled on the floor while also telling Vernon to do the same, Jeonghan sat down beside me so that I was sandwiched between him and Seokmin. Seokmin threw his arm around my shoulder, squeezing our cheeks against each other as we tried to look straight into the camera that Mingyu held in his outstretched, shaking arm. We all laughed so much our cheeks hurt. Once the photo was taken, Vernon and Mingyu made themselves comfortable on the two small armchairs that stood beside the sofa. Jeonghan moved a bit more to the side, giving myself and Seokmin some more room to get comfortable. 

Throughout the 5 movies (well 3 for me) we watched that night, I could feel Seokmin looking over at me from time to time, just as I did to him when he wasn’t watching. After the second or maybe it was the third movie, Seokmin put a blanket over my legs, they only had four blankets, so Seokmin gave me his, I felt bad that he was without one, so I moved a bit closer to him and tried to put some of the blanket over his legs. He smiled at me and then fixed the blanket so it covered his legs and lap better, now we were sitting so close to one another that you couldn’t even get a piece of paper between us. 

It was nice, the close proximity brought on a lot of warmth. Suddenly, the movie in front of me wasn’t as interesting as the insides of my eyelids. Half-laying on the couch, cuddled up to Seokmin, made me feel safe like never before. Before the end of what I’m pretty sure was the third movie, I fell asleep with my head resting on Seokmin’s chest. 

A couple of hours later, I was gently woken up by Seokmin shaking me while whispering my name. “Hey, did you have a nice nap?” I blushed as I realized that I had fallen asleep on him. “Uh, yeah, sorry about that,” He just smiled his usual contagious sunshine smile, and he gently ruffled my hair as he chuckled. “Don’t worry about it, it was really nice and cozy for me too, but I think for the sake of my back and your neck, it would be best to actually move to the beds,” “Yeah, that’s probably a good idea,” 

We got up from the couch and Seokmin showed me the way to the room I would be sleeping in for the night. “Ta-da!” I laughed at the way he threw open the door and literally screamed ‘ta-da’ in the middle of the night. Surely they must receive a lot of noise complaints. Most of them are quite loud. It kind of reminds me of Chan, Seungkwan, Joshua and Jun, they too can be very loud when they want to be. Cheol, Wonwoo, and Minghao too but they are often a bit more calm, unless provoked. 

“Wow, cozy,” I said jokingly. It was a room. There wasn’t much more to it. There was a bed, a window, walls, a floor, and a ceiling, I mean, it’s a room. No decor or any sign of anyone living there except for the fact that the bed was made so that I could sleep in it. “Yeah, seeing as it’s an extra room, we haven’t done anything with it, we’ve tried finding another roommate but anyone who has been interested just hasn’t been a good fit for our group, so the room has remained empty,” “People who don’t fit in with you guys? Do such people exist?” Seokmin walked over to the bed and sat down on it before waving me over, so I too walked over and sat down on the bed. 

“Yeah, there are actually a lot of people who don’t fit in with us. A lot of people find it difficult to get along with Vernon because he’s quiet most of the time, I’m too much for most people, Mingyu is intimidating to most, and Jeonghan is too feminine because he has long hair. So while someone could get along with me, they don’t get along with Vernon, and someone who gets along with Mingyu often has trouble with Jeonghan and so on. We’re very different but we get along so well but apparently, that’s a rarity in this world,” Seokmin genuinely looked sad when talking about people not liking his friends. 

“I guess my friend group at home is like that too, some people are very extroverted while others are the epitome of introverts, but we just work with each other there are many who don’t understand how we can be friends, I wonder sometimes too but whenever we all meet up, there are never any problems,” “Do you miss having your friends close by?” “Of course, how could I not miss them? I talk with most of them almost daily over texts and we often schedule video calls once a week to talk. But at the same time, I’m kind of happy that none of them came with me here, because if they did, I might not have met you guys,” Seokmin turned his head and smiled at me. “Don’t you think we would have become friends even if you had one of them with you?” “I don’t know, I guess it depends on who was here with me, if it were more than just one of them, I probably wouldn’t have even tried making new friends, I don’t know, it’s hard to tell,” 

“Well, I’m very happy that we got to know each other,” Seokmin stood up from the bed, ready to leave the room, but before he took a step, he turned back to me, leaning down and planting a kiss on my head, just like he had before. “Sweet dreams!” And then he left. My face was flushed, as red as a tomato. I fell asleep, thinking only of that kiss. I really need to talk with the guys about this tomorrow. 

The next morning, I woke up to someone, scratch that, it was 100 percent Seokmin, singing loudly in the kitchen while he watched Mingyu making some breakfast. Seokmin does give me Soonyoung vibes now that I think about it, they would probably get along. I changed into the clothes I had brought with me and then I walked out into the kitchen. “~ Good morning ~" Seokmin sang as he saw me opening the door. His voice was really nice actually, he could definitely have been an artist if he wanted to, he had the looks and the talent for it. 

“Good morning, to you too, need any help making breakfast?” Mingyu turned and smiled at my question, “Yeah, that would be great, Jeonghan is out buying some things we forgot about yesterday but he should be back in a few minutes, and Vernon is still asleep unless DK has woke him up with all this singing,” “HEY, I’m just serenading everyone,” I laughed as they bickered with each other, walked over to the sink and washed my hands before I began helping Gyu with the food. 

After a few minutes, the door opened and Jeonghan stepped inside with an overpacked bag in his hand. At the same time, another door inside the apartment opened and a very sleepy Vernon emerged from it. “Ya, help me carry this inside,” Vernon just grunted in response but he did walk over and grabbed the bag from Jeonghan’s hand. “I’m guessing he isn’t a morning person?” “Honestly, none of us are, Mingyu is probably the closest to it, I’m always energetic but mornings are a bit tougher for even me. Jeonghan usually wouldn’t get up early to go shopping but he did today for you,” “Awww, thanks Hannie,” 

We ate breakfast and talked for about 2 hours, after that, I returned to my dorm room. It suddenly felt empty returning to it after just one night away, spending so much time with the guys really made me miss living together with someone. I was going to start unpacking my things from the sleepover when I remembered that I needed to debrief with someone, I was going to call Joshua but saw that he was busy so I ended up calling Minghao. 

“Hey,” “Hi Hao, are you busy? Or do you have time to talk?” “I always have time for you,” “Great, okay, this is sort of a long story cause I have to start from the beginning,” And so I told him of everything that had happened since I met Seokmin and the others all the way until this morning. “Throughout the night I just kept dreaming of that kiss,” “Hmm, it really does sound like you like him. And from what I hear, he doesn’t seem like such a bad guy, none of them seem like it. So what’s the problem?” I sighed, as I continued unpacking my things. “What if he doesn’t like me back? What if I mess things up by saying something? I mean, I don’t really have the best track record of relationships,” 

“Ya, idiot, you can’t think like that. We’re still young, most people would have been through 5 or maybe even 10 relationships by now, and you’ve been through 2. Those have been good, but the timing hasn’t been perfect, but that doesn’t mean that you don’t know who is right for you, besides, thanks to your relationship with Jihoon, you got to know me, Cheol, and Hoshi, things may be weird for you and Boo right now but you still have all the others, and Boo and you will find one another again, I’m sure of it” 

“Since when did you become so wise, Hao?” “Since always, I’m just that great you know. No, but, (Y/n), I’m just being realistic in this. Would he have kissed you on the head if he didn’t feel something for you?” I thought hard about it, Seokmin is a pretty touchy guy, but I had never seen him do something like that to anyone else. “I’m not sure, but maybe not… Ahhh, I wish you were here so that you could meet him and let me know if I should go for it or not,” “Want me to come by and visit next weekend? Jun was gonna come to me, but I can tell him to wait or he could come with me to visit you,” “That would be awesome, I haven’t seen him for so long,” “I’ll see you on Saturday then, in the meantime, remember to just breath and don’t panic, okay?” “Thank you, Minghao, I’ll see you on Saturday, take care” 

Minghao really did make me feel better, and I looked forward to seeing him and Jun again. After Seungkwan and I broke up, Minghao has really been my rock, it’s also easiest for the two of us to meet up as we don’t live too far from one another, only about a 30-minute train ride. The others are at least 2 hours away, some even being as far as 4 hours, so it’s not really a trip you’d make out of the blue. 

The week went by in the blink of an eye, I barely had time to see Seokmin or any of the guys as I had a lot of assignments to work on, I just managed to tell Jeonghan as we passed each other in the hallway that two of my friends were coming to visit during the weekend and they’d love to have dinner with the gang here. I was a bit nervous, what if they don’t get along with each other? I know they’re all friendly but what if their personalities clash, I just had to hope for the best but in my mind, I was panicking. 

Saturday morning came around, and I woke up way earlier than I usually do to go to the train station and met Minghao and Jun there. They didn’t know I would go there but I wanted to see them as soon as possible. The air was a bit chilly with winter approaching and I realized that I definitely didn’t bring a good enough jacket with me for this little trip but the boys’s train was just arriving and then we could hurry back to my dorm. It would be a tight fit for all three of us to stay there but we would manage. 

Minghao and Jun were the only two people getting off the train at this station so finding them was quite easy. “(Y/n)!!!” Jun yelled as he ran over to me, enveloping me in a tight hug. “Junhui!! Haooo!!” I yelled in response as I laughed. Being so close to Jun again, I couldn’t help but take in a big sniff of his scent, he smelled like home. Once I was released from Jun’s hug, I walked over to Minghao and gave him a hug too, he smiled down at me and petted my head, something he often does to me. I once asked why he did that, and he just answered “Because I like doing it and you always smile when I do it”. 

“Come on, I want to show you guys my dorm,” We all chuckled before we began the 10-minute walk back to the campus, talking about everything and nothing as we walked, I filled in Jun on the situation. “So, we’re here to decide if he’s good enough for you or not, got it” “How can you say that, Jun? No one will ever be good enough for our (Y/n),” Minghao said jokingly. “Ya, stop it you two,” 

Once we arrived back at my dorm, I showed the two boys around, thanking my lucky stars that I had actually gotten that single dorm room so that I could bring over a guest or two. “So, here we have the bed and beside it, the couch, and then the tiny kitchen, and over there we have the bathroom, and that is it,” “I mean it’s small but you’ve decorated it nicely, I especially love this picture,” Minghao said teasingly as he pointed to one of the photos I had on the wall, this one, in particular, was one from when I first got to know him, Jihoon and I were standing in the front as we were the shortest, behind us were Minghao, Seungcheol, and Soonyoung. It was precious to me, not only because it had Jihoon in it but also because the other three were there. 

“I like this one! I look so good in it, no one is hotter than me,” Jun said happily as he pointed to another one of the photos on my wall. This one was of myself, Jun, Joshua, Wonwoo, Chan, and Seungkwan. Only Jun, Wonwoo, and I were looking at the camera, the others were looking at each other laughing so loudly that their faces were red. “Hmm, yeah that is one of your better pictures, probably your only one though,” Jun dramatically gasped and turned around to look at me in disbelief at my teasing. “I’m gonna tickle you if you don’t admit that was a lie within 3 seconds,” “Alright, alright, you’re one handsome boy,” “I know,” All three of us broke out into laughter at that, once we calmed down, we began fixing a mattress for one of the boys, the other one would sleep on the couch. 

A couple of hours later it was time to meet up with Seokmin, Mingyu, Jeonghan, and Vernon to eat dinner.  Minghao went through my entire closet picking out the perfect outfit for the dinner, also making sure that Jun, Hao, and I were matching in a subtle way. I ended up wearing a black dress that I bought 3 years ago but never wore, it still looked great on me but I never felt like the occasion was right for the dress Hao was adamant that I wear it, Minghao picked out a gold necklace with a small red charm on it, some small gold hope earrings, and finally Jun’s black leather jacket with red details on it. Jun was planning on wearing the jacket himself but Minghao stole it and said it would look better on me, Jun agreed and so I ended up with his jacket. 

Hao and Jun were almost wearing identical outfits, black dress pants, and gold accessories, the biggest difference in their outfits was the shirts they were wearing and their jackets. Minghao wore a black dress shirt with some slight red details to it and a long black coat, while Jun was wearing a white shirt and a dark grey coat that had a red flower stitched on the back of it. 

Just a few minutes before the three of us arrived at the restaurant, Seokmin sent me a text letting me know the four of them were there and waiting outside. I was feeling a little anxious, scared that this would turn into a chaotic mess if the boys didn’t get along with each other. 

“(Y/n)!” Just as we rounded a corner, DK saw me and shouted my name, Minghao and Jun both halted in their steps looking at the guy who had shouted, but as they saw the large smile on the guy's face, he was waving his whole arm as much as he could, and the three other guys standing a step behind him smiling and waving normally. “I’m guessing that’s Seokmin?” Jun said, “Yeah, hard to miss, right?” “He seems friendly,” Hao added as we continued walking over to the group. 

“Hey, guys, this is Junhui and Minghao. And this is Seokmin, Mingyu, Jeonghan, and Vernon,” Seokmin immediately pulled me into a hug as I finished the introduction while the other guys all shook hands. “Okay, let’s head inside and get some food,” Jeonghan said as he led the way inside. 

Dinner went quite well, all of the guys found common interests and they seemed to get along quite well, even Vernon was very talkative, and my anxiety slowly washed away with every genuine laugh and smile shared between the seven of us. I couldn’t help but look at the way Seokmin looked tonight, though not very dressed up he still looked great, he was wearing simple dark wash jeans and a grey dress shirt, a gold watch on his wrist, and a gold chain around his neck. His black hair shone under the lights, making it seem like he was glowing. 

Minghao nudged my leg and leaned in, whispering in my ear, “If you keep staring like this the whole restaurant will know that you’re in love with the guy,” I blushed at the comment and lightly pushed his shoulder, “Ya, you can’t say things like that,” I tried composing myself but it was hard with both Minghao and Jun giving me knowing looks, as I tried looking away from them I met Jeonghan’s eyes, he too was giving me a knowing look, mischievous smirk, and a raised brow, Holy shit, what if he knows about my crush on DK and says something?!?

“Are you guys sure you will be fine in (Y/n)’s small dorm? You could always crash at our place, it’s a bit bigger than the dorm,” Mingyu kindly offered. “Nah we’ll be fine, we’re used to being way too many people in any room, that’s what you get for being part of a large friend group,” Minghao answered as he put his arm around my shoulder, staring intently at Seokmin. 

We said goodbye to the guys and headed back to my apartment, I was eager to hear what Hao and Jun had to say about Seokmin and the other three as well. Once we arrived inside my dorm Jun and I sat down on my bed while Minghao sat on the couch. “Okay so, what did you think?” 

“They all seemed nice, I didn’t get any bad vibes from any of them, I actually quite enjoyed talking with them and hanging out with them so, I approve of them,” Jun said from beside me, Minghao looked a bit more skeptical, which made me nervous. “I agree with Jun on most parts, didn’t get any bad vibes, they were nice and fun to hang out with. When it comes to your lover boy though,” He paused what he was saying and looked into my eyes, my heart was beating so violently in my chest I was sure the dorms next to mine could hear it. 

“He seems like he really likes you, he immediately noticed our matching outfits, causing him to frown and pout, when I leaned in and whispered something to you, he glared daggers into my soul. The way he hugged you when we first arrived, was enough confirmation that he really likes you, his smile, the way his body relaxed into yours, he’s probably more in love with you than you are with him from what I’ve seen,” “You really think so?” “I’d bet my life on it, he really likes you, and I think he’d be good for you, they are all exactly like you said they’d be, well except for Vernon, he wasn’t very quiet,” “Yeah, even I was surprised with him, he seemed so comfortable with you guys,” “You wanted to know if we would approve of Seokmin for you, and at least, I do,” Minghao finally said, relief flowed through my body, if there was anyone who wouldn’t approve of him, it would have been Minghao, but if he approves, Seokmin must have really impressed him. 

“What about you Jun, what do you think?” I nervously asked him. While Jun wasn’t as skeptical of people as Minghao could be, he was sort of like a brother to me, more so than any of the others in our friend group, so his opinion really matters to me. “You two would look good together, and, he seems like someone who will treat you well. Your eyes are shining and sparkling like never before, you look so happy with him around, so alive,” I leaned in and hugged Jun, who quickly hugged me back, “Thank you, for coming here and helping me out, also, I’ve missed you both,” 

“We’ve missed you too, most of the others were so jealous that we were coming to visit you, especially Joshua and Soonyoung,” Minghao said. “Yeah, Shua was angry at me for calling you before him about this but it made more sense to ask you to come here, you know because of the distance, Jun just so happened to be visiting you so it ended up being the three of us,” Jun laughed loudly as he tried to tell us something about Soonyoung but it was hard to understand as he was laughing too much. Eventually, Hao and I managed to understand what he was saying. “Soonyoung was trying to sneak into my bag so that I would take him with me, the problem was, obviously, the bag was way too small for him to even fit half of himself inside it,” Minghao and I also broke out into laughter as we imagined how that would have looked, such a Hoshi thing to do. Damn, I really wanted to hang out with all my friends but I had to wait until Christmas to go home, so I had to wait another 5 weeks until then. 

We continued talking for a while until we finally decided to head to bed, right before laying down, I checked my phone and saw a text from Seokmin and one from Jeonghan. I checked Seokmin’s text first, “I had a lot of fun today, (Y/n), your friends seem nice! Maybe we can eat lunch together some day this week? Anyways, sweet dreams,” Cute. I answered that I also had fun and that I’d love to eat lunch with him someday. Then I checked the text from Jeonghan, it was short, but it made me nervous. “I know you like him, 😏” I knew he wouldn’t do anything bad but it still made me nervous, so I just answered: “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Maybe I should take a chance and confess my feelings to him, eventually. 

Sunday passed quickly and way too soon, Jun and Minghao had to leave. Once I came back to my dorm from the train station, my dorm felt lonely and cold. It had been so nice to have the comfort of my friends, even if it was a tight fit, I really missed having them around. 

Monday came and I went to my classes, lunch with Seokmin was booked for Wednesday, so for today, I’d eat alone, or so I thought. Just as I was walking towards the cafeteria, I ran into Vernon. “Hey, Vernon, you heading to the cafeteria?” “Yeah, what about you?” “Yeah, me too. Want to eat together?” “Sure, the others are busy so I thought I’d eat alone, but I wouldn’t mind some company,” “Nice, same for me, I prefer eating with someone over eating alone,” And so the two of us went to the cafeteria together, bought our food and found a table. 

For a while, we just sat in silence, eating, but it wasn’t awkward, it would have been with most others but not with Vernon, his silence, and his calmness were almost comforting in the loud buzzing of the cafeteria. “How long have you and Seokmin been dating without telling us?” “WHAT?” I said uncharacteristically loud. “Jeonghan noticed how the two of you acted during dinner on Saturday, we support the relationship but we’re sad you didn’t tell us,” “Vernon, what do you mean? Seokmin and I aren’t dating?” He looked shocked. “Huh? You’re not?” “No, we’re not,” “Oh, hehe, well, um then, maybe, forget what I just asked,” “Why did you think, or Jeonghan, think, we were dating?” 

“I don’t know, something about the way you look at each other, the way you are so close physically, you both slightly blush whenever you accidentally touch one another as we walk, you literally fell asleep on him during movie night and he seemed so happy when that happened that we all just assumed you were dating,” 

Vernon shrugged as we had been talking about something small and insignificant, just brushing it off and continued eating his lunch. I sat there, confused. Maybe Minghao was right, maybe Seokmin was actually in love with me. I had to focus on classes after that but it was hard as my mind kept replaying every moment I had spent with Seokmin, trying to see what everyone else was seeing, but I guess I was too blind with love for him to see it. 

Wednesday couldn’t come soon enough, Seokmin stood outside my classroom, ready to eat lunch together, but he had no idea what would happen. I was going to confess my feelings to him. Unless I chicken out in the last second. 

“Hey, (Y/n)!” “Hey, DK, come, I want to go somewhere other than the cafeteria today,” “Alright,” Seokmin grabbed my hand and let me lead the way to wherever I wanted to go. I led him to the schoolyard, it was cold outside, the ground covered in a small layer of snow, the trees were bare from leaves, and the sun was low on the sky, even though it was midday, it would soon begin its descent. “Why are we outside? Won’t it be cold to eat here?” Seokmin asked, still keeping his charming smile on his lips, even though he looked a little confused. 

“I have something to say first, and I didn’t want to do it inside, promise to just hear me out before you say anything okay?” “Of course, I’ll listen to whatever you have to say,” I took a deep breath, here we go. 

“I like you, as more than just a friend,” That was not how I planned on saying this. I had a whole script about how he’s amazing and has made me feel seen in a way like never before, but I was so nervous that I just blurted it out before I could chicken out. I now stood and nervously looked at his face, worried about his answer. “Can I talk?” He asked, the same charming smile still on his lips. I nodded, too scared to speak. “When you say that you like me as more than a friend, do you mean like romantically?” Once again, I just nodded. Before I could react, Seokmin engulfed me in a tight hug, spinning us around as he cheered. Once he finally stopped, I was feeling a little dizzy, but I looked up at him, meeting his warm eyes. 

“I like you too, a lot, and I have for a while,” Then he leaned in, and placed a gentle kiss on my lips, to which I quickly reciprocated. The kisses I had shared with Jihoon and Seungkwan, were nothing compared to this one. Seokmin made me feel butterflies, and fireworks, whilst also making me feel safe and secure in his arms. The wind was cold and bitter, but I felt warm and happy, as we stood there sharing many kisses, giggling like children as we gazed into each other's eyes. 

“I was so worried that you and Minghao were together or something, the way he seemed so protective over you, the way he leaned in and whispered to you, made me feel sad and jealous,” I was surprised to hear him say that. “Oh, well, Minghao is kind of like that with all his friends, he doesn’t really like sharing that much, but he’s very nice when you get to know him. And the whispering was probably a test to see your reaction, that was kind of the whole point with their trip here, to help me figure out if I should go for it and confess my feelings for you,” 

“I’m guessing, they approved seeing as we’re here right now?” Seokmin looked nervous, probably wanting to hear that my friends had approved of him. “Yeah, they really liked you and the guys,” “What a relief,” “Yeah, so, you’re my boyfriend now?” “No,” “No?” I was confused. “(Y/n), would you be my girlfriend?” Seokmin’s smile widened as he saw my realization of why he had said no just now. “Yes, Seokmin, I will be your girlfriend,” “Now, I’m your boyfriend,” “Can my boyfriend give me another kiss?” “Of course,” And so he leaned in, planting another kiss on my lips. 

“Hey, let’s take a picture!” Seokmin exclaimed loudly, he quickly unlocked his phone and began positioning his arm so that he could fit us both in the frame, he smiled widely while looking into the camera, I on the other hand, leaned up and planted a kiss on his cheek just as he took the picture. 

~ End of flashback still (Y/n)’s POV ~ 

I found the printed version of that photo in the pile in front of me. This photo meant so much to me, Seokmin meant so much to me, he really helped me become more outgoing and carefree, the four years that we were together were amazing, and I wouldn’t change them for anything. 

Four years. My longest relationship so far. But every good thing eventually comes to an end. However, this one hurt differently from the two previous ones I went through. With Jihoon, it was my first relationship but the time wasn’t right and we had to break up, we were too young to handle a long-distance relationship, we still text every now and then, and he’s a precious friend. Seungkwan probably hurt the most because we had grown up together and breaking up our romantic relationship felt like I would lose him forever, we started talking more again 2 years after our break up, things still aren’t the same between us but at least he’s still my friend. 

Seokmin. My sunshine. Breaking up with him, made everything feel empty, and dark. Perhaps, DK and I can find our way back to each other just like I have with Jihoon and Boo. I looked at the last picture we took as a couple. Graduation day, just like our first picture as a couple, he was looking at the camera and I was kissing his cheek. 

~ Flashback in third person POV ~

The newfound couple was inseparable, they met up for lunch every day that they could, always ate dinner together, Friday nights and Saturdays and even Sundays were mandatory date days. Their friends understood that they were happily in love but sometimes they thought that Seokmin and (Y/n) were just too much. 

Seokmin spent countless nights at (Y/n)’s dorm and (Y/n) spent countless nights over at Seokmin and the guys’ house. It came to the point that Jeonghan even said. “Why don’t you just move in here? You’re here all the time anyway,” He sounded annoyed but he loved having (Y/n) around, they were good friends, he was just joking but Seokmin thought it was a great idea. 

“(Y/n), will you move in with me? Er, us?” “I mean, if it’s okay with everyone then sure,” No one said anything other than yes so (Y/n) packed up her things from the dorm and brought them over to the house, or apartment, it felt like living with a family again. She had felt lonely after Minghao and Jun had visited, but not anymore, the apartment was buzzing with life 24/7. 

Four years passed by in the blink of an eye. All five of them had managed to complete their studies and they were graduating. The boys had dressed up in suits and (Y/n) wore a long wine-red dress. Seokmin had some wine-red details on their suits so that the couple matched. All of (Y/n)’s friends and family came to watch the graduation, and the rest of the boys were happy to finally meet Seokmin and his group. They all got along great, almost as if they had known each other for centuries. 

However, things went south after the graduation dinner. (Y/n) and Seokmin went on a walk, just the two of them, talking about everything. Now it was time for them both to find work and be actual adults, they had heard that most other college couples from the graduating classes had either broken up or gotten engaged. 

“So, what do you think will happen to us? Will we end up like the others?” Seokmin asked as we walked hand in hand under the moonlit sky. “I don’t know, no one ever does in these situations, I’m going back home, I’ve gotten some job offers there, and you’re staying here for work. That’s a two-hour drive for us to meet up, which could be worse, but in the long run, will it work? I want it to because I love you but I also don’t want us to suffer from it,” (Y/n) stopped and looked up at the moon, feeling some sort of deja vu, all her relationships had ended because of the distance. 

“I want to believe we could make it even if we live 2 hours from one another but realistically, if we both have work in different cities, we will be building lives in those cities, 2 hours might not seem like a lot now but eventually it will,” He looked down at (Y/n), he loved her so much but he knew, deep inside, he wouldn’t be able to date someone who lived 2 hours away. Seokmin loves physical touch, he loved living with her, having her close, kissing, hugging, and holding hands, you can’t do that if you’re partner is 2 hours away. 

Tears began forming in (Y/n)’s eyes, her heart breaking from the words that would spill out of her mouth. “Let’s break up,” She was trying to be strong, she tried to smile, but her mouth was trembling as she fought to hold back her tears. Seokmin’s own eyes became glossy and a few tears escaped from them, for once he wasn’t smiling and shining brighter than the sun, no, now he looked sad, empty, hurt, dark. “It’s for the best,” He barely managed to get the words out, his voice trembling as he too fought back the tears. 

“I love you, Lee Seokmim, I really do,” (Y/n)’s words were barely audible as she began crying, but Seokmin heard them, loud and clear. “I love you too, (L/n) (Y/n),” Seokmin’s tears ran freely down his cheeks, as he leaned in and the now broken-up couple shared one final kiss together. After the kiss, they separated from one another and left in different directions. Seokmin walked back to the apartment, while (Y/n) took out her phone and called Minghao, frantically crying. 

Minghao was surprised to see that she was calling him so late but nonetheless, he answered, “Hey, what’s up?” “Mmh, can I… Uhm, oh god, can I stay in your hotel room with you?” “(Y/n), what’s going on? Why are you crying? Scrap that, where are you?” “I’m outside the hotel, just like 3 minutes away,” “I run down and meet you at the doors,” 

The second Hao saw (Y/n) he ran over to her and embraced her in a hug as she cried into his chest. “We broke up,” Was all she could say before she broke down even more. “You don’t have to say anything more right now, but just so you know, I don’t have my own room, I’m sharing with Jun, Joshua, and Wonwoo, if you don’t want to go up there and share with them we can see if they have another room and book that, if you don’t want to talk, just squeeze my arm once for going to the guys and twice for a new room,” (Y/n) wouldn’t mind being comforted by the others as well so she gave Hao’s arm one tiny squeeze. 

Hao led (Y/n) up to the room, the other three were surprised to see (Y/n) there, and especially crying hysterically. Minghao just mouthed, break up. And they all understood, (Y/n) and Seokmin were no longer together. 

That night the four guys tried their best to comfort their heartbroken friend but they all knew that it would take time to get over this. They promised to help her out with packing up her things from the apartment she had shared with Seokmin, Jeonghan, Mingyu, and Vernon. All to help her come home faster. 

Saying goodbye to the four guys who had been her closest friends at college, hurt, but she knew they would keep in touch, maybe not Seokmin to begin with but she hoped that they could stay friends, eventually, once both of them, had healed. (Y/n) moved back to her hometown, but not back in with her parents, no, she had accepted a job offer and had gotten her own apartment, it was small, but it was hers. 

She often hung out with all her friends who still lived in the city, mostly with Minghao, Jun, Seungcheol, Soonyoung, Joshua, and Wonwoo. Dino and Boo still had a year at college before they would move back, Jihoon still lived far away but he was there in spirit, and his songs still reminded (Y/n) of the sound of home. Jeonghan and Vernon had moved back to the city as well, though they lived on the other side of town so she didn’t meet them often but every once in a while the whole group would eat dinner together. Seokmin and Mingyu stayed in the same city as their college, they visited sometimes but mostly their old friends. 

Time kept going and they all grew up, some things stayed the same, and a lot of things changed. Just like the seasons of the year do. Spring comes with blooming flowers, then summer arrives with its heat and fun, then autumn with all its color, and finally winter with its chilly breeze and cozy atmosphere, before it all continues in a neverending cycle. 

~ End of flashback, in (Y/n)’s POV ~ 

I had gone through most of the photos in the little box, happy to have been reminded of all these memories yet sad at the same time. I don’t know for how long I had been up here, the sky had turned dark, it must have been a few hours at least. 

“(Y/n), darling? Are you up there?” “Yeah, give me a second, I’m on my way down,” “Be careful, don’t fall,” “I won’t, I promise ---” 

~ To Be Continued ~ 

Who do you think (Y/n)’s boyfriend is? Is it Jihoon, has he suddenly returned to her life? Or is it Seungkwan, has their childhood friends-to-lovers trope returned? Or is it Seokmin? Have they resolved their long-distance problem? Or is it someone else? Perhaps a friend she has known for a long time? Someone she has relied on for many things? 

[evakuality]

4 years of Druck s3 - week 7

Things of note in this episode:

1.  This is probably my favourite episode and so this is likely to be lengthy!

2.  I really love how this conversation with Hans differs from the og.  In a lot of ways I prefer this one, unlike the one in episode 5.  In this, first, Matteo says ‘if it makes you happy’ he’ll call him his guru and I love that change in the dynamic.  Plus, I really do love that Hans is attuned enough to religion that he takes Matteo into church to have this conversation (and so Matteo’s mother does in a way see him in church that day).  I think it’s very important that a lot of Matteo’s issues about all this stem from religion and so taking him into a place of religion to demystify it is so important.  Also, Hans’s advice about David isn’t that he’s probably playing Matteo (as Eskild suggests to Isak), but that he’s probably not out and needs time and respect for that or to be left alone.  It resonates in a different way, and the fact that this religious breakthrough happens at Easter is a really lovely touch.  Plus we get the whole bit about Matteo’s mother, and he’s able to come to terms with her and her issues in a way that leaves him much calmer and more at peace.  Compare the above picture to this one from the start of the episode:

This earlier Matteo was so sad and he was at seas and all confused.  But at least he knew that going to Hans would help - and was able to do it even when Hans had been so upset with him before.  And kudos to Hans for seeing past all that and recognising that Matteo genuinely does need a gay guru and being that person for him.  This conversation has done exactly what Matteo needed it to and he’s so much happier and more at ease both with the David thing and with his mother.  

3.  Speaking of religion, this whole bit with Amira is a) so lovely and b) so important.  After their previous discussion, this has needed to be addressed and she does it in such a gracious way - which he returns.  I do think that without the chat with Hans he may have been less keen to hear what Islam thinks about homosexuality but together these two conversations have really helped him unpack some of his prejudices about religion, and he is far more willing and able to open up to hi9s mother with the hope that she won’t reject him.  I absolutely love that ‘for Easter’ Amira’s family has made some food to share, thus showing Matteo that religion can be open and accepting of other faiths, cultures and lifestyles.  Amira doesn’t just tell him she and her religion accept him, she shows him and it’s very powerful.  Even if her bringing outside food into a cafe worries me, since you’re absolutely not allowed to do it here.

4.  I really love the colours in this episode - they’re so much warmer and more cheerful than the previous ones.  Partly that’s because this was Easter and the colours work really well for that time of year.  But also because Matteo is starting to warm up and open up into his new self.  I am, once again, so impressed by the way light and colour is used in this show.  It’s just soooo goooooood.

I also love how much Carlos has grown - Kiki has such strong views and she wants everyone to agree with them.  In a lot of her life, people just don’t (I imagine Zoe must be such a stress for her, for example), but Carlos, who has been shown as a bit of a lad and quite ignorant and occasionally offensive, has taken it all on board and you can see it in the way he acts and the things he says now.  He enjoys his new knowledge and certainly has a lot of sensitivity to people and their relationships.  He’s the one who knew things were off with Matteo and Sara, and he’s the one who moves to listen actively to Matteo here and who says things he hopes are supportive and encouraging.

5.  Sara.  This poor kid.  We see here the culmination of everything that’s been going wrong in her life and it must have been so hard seeing Matteo in the midst of all this.  But I like to think that she feels lighter and happier after this is done.  We do know what she reaches out to Leonie after Matteo suggests that talking to people helps.  If we compare this picture of her to the way she was shown in s1 and even 2, she’s so diminished, shot from above and looks so weak and vulnerable.  Even compared to the social media post she made wearing this exact outfit, she looks different.  But it’s maybe like a wound being lanced - like Matteo she was trying to put up a facade, live a fake life in that earlier post.  But now she’s able to be real and yeah that hurts but it’s better and they will both be able to move on and be happier more authentic people in the aftermath.

6.  Speaking of hurting - Matteo makes so much great progress this episode and he’s able to become a happier and more settled person.  But at the core is this boy who misses the boy he thought he was creating something nice with.  He told Hans he ‘can’t believe’ that David doesn’t want him and I think that makes this even harder.  The pictures and videos David sends are sending him mixed messages.  On one hand, he’s keeping up the contact and trying to maintain something with Matteo - on the other, this stuff is all ‘it’s not you it’s me’ ‘in a different life we’d be in Detroit’ etc etc.  There’s no hint that things can be ‘real’ between them in this life and so Matteo keeps having these small moments of sadness throughout the episode.

7.  And so that’s why this whole part is tinged with a melancholy.  Unlike in other versions, there’s no passion here, no ‘throwing caution to the wind’ or anything.  Instead it’s so gentle and cautious, so fragile.  There’s a sigh of relief that David is here, but neither of them is at ease.  Of course, we start to understand David’s thing the next day.  But even here it’s so clear why Matteo feels the way he does - everything since David told him he’s not into him has been such a rollercoaster that it’s not possible for him to throw caution to the wind.  He’s felt so much sadness and heartbreak about David even this week that he can’t allow himself to fully dive into this moment.  And of course we’re left with this shot of David’s face and we get to see that he’s not happy either.  It’s a long long few hours til the next morning and David’s secret!

[theromaboo]

Inspired by @just-late-roman-republic-things's toga alignment chart, I will look at images of things that have been called togas and rate them.

Up first, this specimen down below.

0/10 That is not a Party Toga Costume for Adults, that is a red scarf you've tucked into your belt. If this was what a toga was, Cato the Younger would NOT have gotten away with not wearing a tunica underneath.

Now this one below.

2/10 eBay is clearly very confused over if it's Greek or Roman, but it's certainly a step up over the previous one. This time, the scarf is not tucked into the belt (there isn't one) and is just hanging freely and honestly could kind of be a little like a toga if it wasn't scarf-shaped.

Now, this one below—oh hey that's me!

13-year-old me strikes again. Believe it or not, my French teacher will call my paenula a toga shortly after that picture was taken. I wonder what her idea of a toga was if a paenula with a hood sewn on counted.

1/10 it's literally a paenula.

Fun fact, before I sewed the hood on, it actually was toga-shaped, albeit too thick and too small.

For a second I was spooked out because I thought 13-year-old me had momentarily gained an extra ghostly finger in this picture. But no, the mirror was just dirty as fuck. Whoops!

For that one, 6/10 because it's the first one that actually resembles a toga! But I 100% draped it wrong and it was too small anyway. And so hot. I'm sweating just remembering how hot I felt taking that photo. It's not feasible to wear it if the temperature where you are is above 10°C.

But what if the temperature is below that?

I changed into a thin T-shirt and a short skirt, took out that exact paenula and wrapped it around my body, and stepped outside in the cold, Canadian night.

(it's actually obscenely hot out right now. Right now it's -6°C, which is around 20°F for you Amerians. That is extraordinarily hot for January. It's because of El Niño. Normally, at night, this time of the year, it's around -30°C, which is cold. That's like -22°F. And them usually there are a few days of at least -40°C, which interestingly is also -40°F. So -6°C right now is nothing. But it's cold enough to prove a point)

Once I was outside, I set a timer for five minutes on my phone.

Observations:

I probably should've put on footwear. My bare toes in the snow are not having a fun time right now.

My god, this thing stops wind like a brick wall. I feel wind on the exposed parts of my body and nothing on the covered parts.

My right arm is starting to get a little chilly. It's completely exposed.

My toesies...

Hmmm I've reached the half-way point and I don't really feel cold. Of course, the exposed parts of my body are a bit cold and my feet are quite numb, but the covered parts of my body are starting to get really toasty. Like, my left shoulder is actually starting to get quite hot.

One minute remaining and I'm fine. The night is peaceful and still, and quiet. The stars are bright tonight. Life is quite beautiful.

Oh. The time has finished!

This paenula-turned-toga is so warm that it actually is pretty appropriate to wear in -6°C. If I was wearing pants and a long sleeved shirt and most importantly shoes, I would've been quite comfortable outside. If the toga were longer, I could've covered more parts of my body, and that would've made it warmer too.

I don't know what I was trying to prove in this experiment but 10/10 would try again. Too bad I can't give this to Octavian because he wouldn't have to wear four tunics if he had this. It's a bit small as a toga but it's warm nevertheless. I forgot which fabric it was but it was the cheapest thick one.

I want to judge more "togas" later but now I'm tired and my feet need a warm bath. I hope you guys enjoyed!

[noellesnowelle]

Monthly (& weekly) Update

Missing almost all of Octobers spooky, autumn mood ... but it's going upwards again

October Recap

A lot of time was spent in some kind of mind fog. I rewatched all 50 episodes of 'The Untamed' before the 24. of October because Netflix showed me that the series will be taken down then. Weirdly, but luckily, it is still there but I wasted a lot of my time and energy on watching Netflix. Originally I planned to rewatch the series during winter break when I actually have more free time, but because it is my favourite series and Netflix wanted to take it down, I had to watch it again.

Because of that my mental and physical health suffered a lot during that two weeks...

But I also did a lot of art in October! I did my first ever Bob Ross tutorial and it was so fun! I also went outside and did tree and leaf studies around my house (in the picture). Hopefully I will do it again sometime soon.

Besides that I also jumped into research about Romania and Romanian (prompted by a question in my Finnish course).

Romania is such a beautiful country and Romanian is also such a beautiful language! I didn't realize before that Romanian is a Romance language (even though it is literally in the name) and it is so useful! Because I learned Spanish for 6 years in school I can already understand a little bit. But I also love the sound of it. Especially because of the eastern-european influnces like 'sch' sounds.

I hope I can travel to Romania in the future. (I also have such a strong longing for the mountains. That is really the only thing I am missing here in Finland...)

Now a good old Weekly Update

28.10.-03.11.2024

finally a good week again... studying, dancing and the first snow!

Studying

I had a schooling for the Hygiene Passport and it felt so good to finally learn something else again besides Finnish

during this week was another self-study day and it is so nice to have these inbetween regular days (I can focus better on things that I don't know already, plus I am quicker with completing all the tasks!)

I took a deep dive into research Finnish Art as preparation for the coming week, it is so interesting!

Languages

I still need to work on my method for studying vocabulary, this is definitely a project for the next weeks

I studied a bit of Romanian. Every time it is so much fun trying to pronounce a new language. Although it is like taking wobbly baby steps. But it is an exhilarating feeling!

Health

the dry and cold air outside and the dry and warm air inside is not good for my skin and eyes...

I did a few dance workouts this week - my favourite form of cardio!

feeling a bit stressed this weekend and relaxing was difficult, but Yoga helped a bit

For myself

I learned the chorus dance of Kiss of Life's 'Igloo' Dance and it was so much fun. The dance is so addicting. I actually managed to learn it in 2 hours which is super fast for me. But it probably helped that it is in a style that I move more naturally in.

I took time to watch the old Addams Family movies for the first time and it was nice. I want to catch some of the remaining spooky, autumn vibes (even with snow outside) as I feel like I missed my favourite time and month of the year...

this week's

reading / watching / listening

Bitterthorn - Kat Dunn (2nd time I am reading it)

Addams family 1 & 2

Ronja Rövardotter

Imaginary Friend - ITZY

Igloo (Igloo) - Kiss Of Life

Smoke - Otyken

(I literally accidentally deleted this post right after posting it and instead of letting the hour of writing go to waste, I am rewriting it now stubbornly instead of crying and never doing it, even though I already wanted to sleep. Which is why it is also shorter than it was, but maybe that's a good thing... Good Night... 40 min. later than planned...)