#pickle anon war

[thepicklegifter]

"nothing bad happens in January" WRONG pickle anon war

[scrybe-of-death]

I'm now realizing that some people who choose pickle stealers might be on the opposite side of the war as their lover and...

(maniacal laughter) AAAANGST!!!!

[theoneandonlysun]

SUUUUN THERE’S A PICKLE WAAAAAR

There's a wh4t now?

Sun is informed of the war.

Oh... well... I'll be on Pickle An0n's side, because h3's nice. He doesn't deserve that...

[thepicklegifter]

NUH UH

I WILL steal ALL the pickels

[kneelingshadowsalome]

Like everybody else, I love young!recruit, but lately, the absolute treasure that is the Colonel is utterly taking up residence in my brain and refusing to leave. Pleeeeease, if you could indulge a simple anon, I'd be forever grateful 💜💜💜

Look… Colonel König is a gift from God!!

Imagine a calm, confident, emotionally stable and intelligent man who's worked on himself, Colonel König is the opposite of young recruit (who's basically a lovesick fuckboy), he calms a woman’s nervous system simply by entering the room. His colleagues respect him, his subordinates aim to please him, men want to be him, and women want to be with him... But he only has eyes and loins for you!

Man has a nice, healthy layer of fat on top of his muscles (unlike the young lean recruit who really ought to eat more) – it’s a shallow thing to do but you can't help but compare these two!Even his musk is somehow different, it’s better, less pungent... Nice and mellow, manly, robust, you sometimes pout when he says he has to take a shower :/

Colonel has a few scars on his neck, chest, abs: old wounds that have long since healed, but he absolutely loves it when you caress them like a maiden about to swoon. And it’s only natural that you worship his war-torn body, because Colonel König worships you.

Pulls you into his arms when he comes home, giving you a passionate, unhurried kiss. Takes a good, long look at you – his darling precious wife, look at how beautiful you are… Has to inhale your scent, good and deep, God, he has missed you so much...

And the way he makes love to you :// It's like he makes love to your soul, too. You could almost cry from how well he's attuned to your needs, man’s so present that you feel shy, even after all these years. Imagine getting flustered when he’s inside you, because you do, the attention is too much.

Colonel König looks deep into your eyes while he fucks you, with a small smile on his lips. Of course he sees how hot and bothered his pretty little wife is, getting sweaty and breathless even if it’s him who’s doing all the work. How did he even end up with such a needy woman...? He must’ve done something right…

And if you’re in need of a rougher ride, he’ll fuck you against a wall, sure, no problem! Man’s as strong as a bull, his stamina is not as through the roof as younger recruit’s but what the older Colonel lacks in desperate quickies he makes up in skill and quality loving <3

Strolls into the kitchen in the morning when you’re making coffee, large hands disappearing under your (his) shirt as he comes behind you and rumbles that he loves you. You find him staring at you, at the store when you're picking your favorite pickle jar, at home when you're reading a book. When you stop and smile and ask him why he's looking at you like that, he tilts his head and says: “Just admiring my beautiful wife :)”

Calls and checks up on you often, laughs huskily at the other end of the phone when you tell him about your silly work day. You get a feeling that you brighten his days with your adorableness, and when you send him cute cat videos, he likes every single one of them. Just imagining the respected, sometimes even feared Colonel watching cat videos in his office in the middle of the day, smiling and double tapping the screen before rerurning to his work, makes your heart hurt.

Young recruit only sends you dirty memes and suspicious gun videos... He only likes your selfies, and begs you to send him naughty videos while he's deployed :( If you sent him a cat video he'd probably joke about making a hat out of that cat...

When you tell the Colonel about young recruit's latest antics, he just sighs and says that the boy has a long way to go. Your husband is mainly interested in that the pup has managed to please you, and asks if he needs to give the rascal an earful... or a warning. You find yourself protecting the poor recruit who would, in truth, never survive the wrath of his older version. It's not that the Colonel enjoys unnecessary violence or would beat younger König into a pulp, it's just that he can get a little intimidating when it comes to the issue of pleasing and respecting his wife.

One wrong move, and the young recruit will fly out the door and won't be let in. Nope, not even if it rains and the sorry dog is whining and scratching at the door :((

[mychlapci]

Starsceam and Blades were together before the war and during the academy days, they were freaky before.

They did some nasty stuff together but loved each other, then blades was stuck in stasis blah blah que much much worse and meaner Starscream.

(I'm a sucker for smut & fluff, I admit it. )

definitely not common knowledge 2 the other bots.

- Blades obsessed anon :3 - 🎀 -

Ooh, nice. You know, I always had a bit of a joke headcanon that Blades is the oldest of the rescue bots. My reasoning is simple: It would be very funny.

And it makes for a perfect chance for him to have known Starscream for a while, and gotten cozied up to him too. Starscream was his mean girlfriend that always reminded the server that, um, excuse me, he asked for no pickles.

But onto the serious stuff. Blades meeting Starscream again after all those years and his panels are gushing. I think it turns him on that Starscream has become even meaner and more pushy. Blades comes back home covered in scratch marks and limping a little because you know Starscream pulled out that barbed seeker spike and made his little helicopter scream.

[lovelyelbowleech]

Hi Lovely! Soooo you might know who I am based on the nature of this ask (i started with anon asks and now i can't stop) but I've been working on ch 8 of War Crimes and a certain moment has gotten me stuck and also sparked a debate in the fanfic discord. It's this: "It was roast fish again with some accompanying rice and what looked like salted pickles, perhaps of some sort of tuber."

I assumed those were pickled cucumbers at first, as you do, but the tuber part got me confused, like maybe there was another vegetable in the mix along with the pickles. Now that I'm typing this out though I'm realising this may not be a pickled cucumber at all, and just a random vegetable Sokka doesn't know of... but I haven't ever seen pickled veggies outside of cucumbers be called just pickles, and google just shows me cucumbers. So I'm asking you, is it really something else? Does Sokka not know his veggies??? Cucumbers aren't tubers.

Sending you this in an ask to end the server debate that's been going on for 2 days. Please. The nature of the vegetable is crucial to the storyline.

So sorry I have taken so long to answer this - been on some meds to control immune issues that have made me a bit brain dead 😅 and my focus has not been wonderful. 

I think I was using pickles as a word for preserved - but you can certainly get pickled veg where I live - all sorts from tomatoes to turnips! I guess it could also be possible that SOkka doesn’t know Earth/Fire veg/food at this stage, or at least not well enough to correctly identify some things 😂 So I think you can go with whatever seems best to you!  

Sorry if that is not very helpful, my brain is slow 😬

[thepicklegifter]

That's why I'm not giving them any >:(

I give these out for fun and to show I like a person (platonic obviously (or is it?)), but this one guy is trying to steal them so now they don't get any.

Fsh. There is now a pickle anon war. Whose side do you reside on?

(look at my blog for context if you need it)

-Pickle anon

what is the purpose of stealing the pickls . why didn't they just. asking nice or something or get they own pickol.

[copperbadge]

Radio Free Monday

Good morning everyone, and welcome to Radio Free Monday!

Ways to Give:

Anon linked to a fundraiser for thewalrus-said, whose kitty Pickles recently passed, and who has taken on debt from the veterinary bills at a time when they also need to fundraise to move cross-country for work. You can read more, reblog, and find giving information here and also find purchase info for their queer romance novels here.

Buy Stuff, Help Out:

queerdo-mcjewface is selling a pair of American Vintage high heels on eBay to raise money for the Halo Trust, which removes land mines from former war zones and advocates for their abolition. You can check them out here! (As of the writing of RFM they had not yet sold, I checked.)

News to Know:

I actually sourced this myself but thought people might like to be aware of it -- funkittoys is a small business selling unique and sustainably-made sex toys, including a toy called the "NoFrillDo" designed to be particularly affordable. They came to my attention via a post about their "sliding scale" nofrilldos, which are a $14-minimum but otherwise pay-what-you-can toy; those are currently sold out but come back into stock occasionally, and I felt the spirit of the shop was well worth a namedrop on RFM. I can't speak to the toys themselves, I don't own one, but I wanted to shout-out a fellow small business trying to make pleasure affordable for everyone.

Recurring Needs:

sir-tailypoe linked to a fundraiser for tul1pmania, who is trying to escape an abusive marriage and needs short-term funds for moving expenses and repair to a wheelchair, which broke right before his planned moving date. You can read more, reblog, and find giving information here.

nivchara-yahel and rivalconga are disabled queer siblings with ongoing support needs; they are raising funds for help covering housing, food, and medication for chronic illnesses while one looks for from-home work and the other applies for SSDI. You can read more, reblog, and find giving information here. They also have a graphic you can post to your own socials for fundraising.

And this has been Radio Free Monday! Thank you for your time. You can post items for my attention at the Radio Free Monday submissions form. If you're new to fundraising, you may want to check out my guide to fundraising here.

[tomionefinds]

Hi! Could you recommend fics that feature Tom with trauma? Preferably long fic with a happy ending, but I understand this might not be a popular concept(it's usually only Hermione with trauma) so I'll be grateful with whatever you can find. Thank you!♡♡

Hi Anon:

As you said this is not always a terrible popular trope and I certainly don't read it so I can't speak as if these are going to be up your alley but they have Tom going through it. You might want to look at our Tom: Redeemed tag -Haus

Ultima Ratio by Winterblume M| Complete | 737k

Ultima ratio - the last resort. At last the day of the Final Battle against Lord Voldemort has come. Harry, Ron and Hermione fight bravely against their nemesis - but then something goes wrong. And Hermione finds herself alone in a precarious situation.

Jagged by hiccupfound

E | Complete | 151k

He’s not like what she learned about. Not how Harry described him from the Pensieve.

Have You Ever by Lady Moonglow

T | Complete | 180k

With the war looking bleak, the Golden Trio, Ginny, Draco, and Lavender go back to Tom Riddle's 7th Year to destroy Lord Voldemort once and for all. What Hermione DIDN'T count on, however, is a shared common room, a curse, and a crazy little thing called love.

*****

Edit:

Perhaps the following

Experiment of the Mind by NerysDax

T | Complete | 17k

Healer-Trainee Hermione Granger finds herself in a pickle when confronted with a most troublesome patient.

[thepicklegifter]

Bro how did I ever get an evil opposite version of me. @thepicklestealer, when did you spawn? Have you always existed or did you just kinda pop into existence?

... Also, where are you? I've cleaned and organized the room I keep my stash in like fifteen times now waiting for you to get here so I can like... Battle you for it or whatever. Do I need to give some hints out...? I prepared all these really cool defenses and everything...

(no but seriously mod creature here I am so amused by the fact that my silly guy has inspired someone to make an opposite version, and every time I'm reminded of that fact my day gets a tiny bit better lol /p)

[indigitalembrace]

heeeeeeeyyyyyyyyy shrimpy  ~ <3

what the heck is up my good buddy. my homeslice. my compadre. frendo.

its ya gurl. Goblin anon postin from another pc. dont blow this one up, k? gotta support ya local public libraries they cant afford to buy new puters. be considerate and keep in mind all these people here who want to use the pcs too hmm?

look, shrimpy, I get ittttt. not everyone can avoid being sad an lonely friendless loser. makin real friends can be hard! but I think u should direct all that energy to somthin a bit healthier, yeah? like making friends with chat gpt. safer and requires less anxiety. seriously thou, go see a therapist or somthin. the robot uprising hasnt actually happened yet u dont need to devote urself to an ai overlord.

i mean. u really handing out invites to the future corpse party on their behalf, huh? tut tut. kiiinnddddaaaa irresponsible, no? or mabbe u dont care?

well thats a bit of a pickle. because you got my little sister involved you maladjusted socially stunted freak.

it will be a pain to replace my hardware, yeah. but I do in fact back up my crap to external drives. u did win this battle. ill give u that. but i will win the war.

i coming for you shrimpy and ill have you and that manipulative little pink toad heads on a pike.

(btw: if u see this mr axolotl, if u try any supernatural bullcrap with me Sec will *know*. no matter how much she likes you she will never forgive u for hurting me. she will Know it was u. and she will disown you. dont wanna lose another “friend” now do u?)

ok good talk! was wonderful catching up with yall :) have a nice day lovelies! ~

Goblin Out ^_^

{you have logged off publibpc3}

[YOU'VE GOT MAIL!] To: 🦐 From: Goblin

[system-of-a-dude]

Welcome to THE HIVEMIND!!!

Welcome to the not main account of whoever made this account… hrm… I wonder who?? Anyways in this system of a dude (HE SAID THE THING OMG!!) there’s around 6 members and we’re VERY Introject heavy. We are an adult bodily!! We have OSDD and we are very neurodivergent (AuDHD). Collectively we’re a abrosexual trans man (he/him).

Here’s the members and their tags!!!

Peter (he/him) - adult, Peter Steele factive, pansexual aceflux, massive music enjoyer (Type O Negative, The Beatles, Black Sabbath), #1 Toki Metalocalypse lover, shameless self-shipper, hopeless romantic — Peter’s posts will be tagged #peter -🌲

Pickles (he/him) - adult, Pickles (Metalocalypse) fictive, Bisexual, another music lover (System of a Down, Slipknot, metal in general, glam metal), Nickles truther, freaky mfer, — Pickles’ posts will be tagged #pickles -🥒

Toki (he/him) - adult, age regressor (will not post when regressed without Pickles babysitting), Toki (Metalocalypse) fictive, pansexual ace-spec, local silly billy, loves cats + Star Wars (ep 1-6 + Clone Wars) + aliens + space + dinosaurs + clowns — Toki’s posts will be tagged #toki -🚀

Dove (he/dove/hy/coo) - adult, brainmade, mlm gay ace-spec, pronoun and gender hoarder, loves doves, silly fluff ball — Dove’s posts will be tagged #dove -🪽

Medic (he/him) - adult, Medic (Team Fortress 2) fictive, mlm gay ace-spec, won’t be very active — Medic’s posts will be tagged #medic -🏥

The Host (he/him) - adult, doesn’t want to be named on this blog, won’t be active — The Host’s posts will be tagged #hivemind host -💥

Other tags!

Pickles and Peter — #the pp brothers -🌲🥒

Pickles and Toki (for when Toki is regressed and Pickles is taking care of him) — #brutal babysitting -🥒🚀

collective posts will be tagged #hivemind -💬

anonymous posts will be tagged #anon -👤

[the12thnightproject]

Can I have a request for the Warlords reaction to an MC who has culinary skills like from the anime "Food Wars"? (Just in case you're not familiar with it, its an anime about cooking. Really fun to watch. There are clips on Crunchyroll and Youtube). I know that when the Warlords would dig into MC's food, their kimonos would fly off (its part of the show-if a meal is SO good, clothes would fly off- sans under garments).

Hope this is a good one! 🍛🥙

Hi Anon!

Thank you for the ask - I wasn't familiar with the anime, but I did find some youtube clips, which were helpful...

An MC whose cooking is so good it causes spontaneous random acts of nudity and flying kimonos…

Nobunaga: (Is caught raiding the kitchen for leftovers) Hideyoshi, “My lord, haven’t I told you to stop eating sweets late at night?”  Nobunaga, “I’m just getting a glass of water.” Hideyoshi, points to the kimono hovering near the ceiling. “Uh huh.”

Hideyoshi: First experience of MC’s food was on a picnic. Won’t be making that mistake again. Still has flashbacks (emphasis on flash) of creeping back into Azuchi, holding the picnic basket in front of his … picnic basket.

Mitsuhide: Sadly, Mitsuhide’s lack of tastebuds means that he cannot experience MC’s food the way everyone else does. But that just means he can have fun secretly feeding MC’s cooking to random people (Hideyoshi) at random (inconvenient) times and laughing when their (Hideyoshi’s) kimonos fly away.

Masamune:  Wants to learn MC’s cooking secrets. Learns MC’s cooking secrets. He and MC spend happy hours in the kitchen, tasting as they cook. Both have some rather… intimately placed burn scars. Neither cares.

Ieyasu: Doesn’t think MC can possibly make food hot enough for him. Learns lesson when kimono doesn’t just fly off him – it spontaneously combusts.

Mitsunari: Devours an entire dish while reading. Doesn’t notice loss of kimono. Walks around naked for several hours before Hideyoshi finds him and throws a haori over him. Thinks that he possibly forgot to get dressed this morning? (It… wouldn’t be the first time).

Keiji:  Upon discovery of the properties of MC’s food, perfects a magic act that culminates in the entire audience losing their clothes at once.

Ranmaru: Is such a wee sprite that when his kimono flies, it carries Ranmaru with it. They call him “The Flying Bun.” Is now a regular feature of Keiji’s magic act.

Kennyo:  Eats the food. Presumes his kimono has entered a higher plane of existence.

Motonari: Philosophical conundrum. MC’s food is the only food aside from his own that he is willing to eat, however nudity on a pirate ship is neither safe nor sanitary.

Kicho: “No thank you. I’m not hungry right now. I’ll do take out – I’m sure you’re familiar with the concept of takeout aren’t you, Future Girl?”

Kenshin: Why eat food when there are pickled plums to be had? Can you make pickled plums, MC? Upon discovering that MC can indeed make pickled plums, and what happens to him when he eats them, he puts MC in the dungeon, so that she will only make pickled plums for him, and to protect her from naked warlords.

Kanetsugu:  “What did you do to Lord Kenshin, MC? I’m sorry but your cooking is TOO dangerous. We’re going to have to banish you. What’s this? Mochi? Well… perhaps just a taste…”  *poof*

Shingen:  “Let’s feed each other.”

Yoshimoto:  As he is unphased by casual nudity, and likes good food, ends up spending a lot of time walking around the castle naked, and startling the maids.

Yukimura: Stop feeding people! It’s winter! What, are you crazy? We can’t walk around Kasugayama naked. We’ll freeze to death. And stop staring at me! It only appears small because I’m cold, dummy.”

Sasuke: “Fascinating…” designs a series of randomized double blinded experiments with different dishes to compare the trajectory, velocity, and total distance travelled of flying kimonos.

@mllorei

[sunflowercider]

speaking of the white cavalry i know sir blanc said he'll give his loyalty to lloyd in a roundabout way but lloyd said to be careful with his words during the dead matsodons attack...

which brings me who do you think they sided with during the fourth ending spoiler where the queen waged war when she bace a bit crazy/paranoid

DELICIOUS ASK ANON, SO FUCKING DELICIOUS.

Damn. Damn. If I wanted to waste a few hours or days, I would sketch out entirely what I think happened politically and geographically in the fourth spoiler. While that future ends incredibly horribly, the lead up to it? Im so sorry, destiny writes some good stories (´-ω-`)

Anyways. Specifically about the white cavalry. After the dead mastadons attack kills 6 of the cavalry, Lloyd feels terrible. He feels it's only right to treat their remains with incredible care and respect, send a letter to the queen telling their tales as flowery as possible to help their loved ones get cared for in their absence, and build a memorial stone for them. Lloyd takes their lives (and the loss of them) gravely seriously. And Sir Blanc is moved nearly to tears.

This is a man who has been quite literally treated like a chess piece in others' wars. And here's some random noble who simply had an unpredictable skirmish with monsters, not even a proper battle, and treats their lives like precious gold. Sir Blanc, in his heart, wants to follow Lloyd (and I imagine the others in his group feel the same).

Lloyd may have roundaboutly turned him down but. The cavalry is still here you know.

When the queen loses her mind, there's first a civil war between those who support and those who oppose her. The Fronteras technically pick the side supporting her, but remain neutral otherwise. This is the most uncertain part for the cavalry. They could get called by the queen during this time, but my hunch is that the Fronteras' status quo is kept, as they are still technically an area of growth for the Cremona region, as well as a stronghold with the apartment fortresses. Leaving the cavalry with the County would make sense; theyre an important military group, but only a part of the queens forces. However, if the cavalry gets called at that moment, they will follow her. They are still loyal to the queen, they just also want to follow Lloyd... and hey, he's technically supporting her.

Now. If the cavalry stay at the Fronteras until the queen makes the error of attacking a peaceful foreign country and Lloyd opposes the decision? Oh ho hoooo thats a whole different ballgame.

The first civil war actually ended before that. Once the queen wins that, she attacks the Benetto Kingdom as a way to consolidate her nobles. (You know, similar to what the Sultan wanted to do?) Lloyd opposes when he hears - he built the route to Benetto for trade, not military. Then the next civil war begins.

HOW does the White Cavalry respond here?? What a pickle, what a pickle. There's no more pretending the queen and Lloyd stand aligned. There's a choice to be made. They're originally loyal to the queen but... she recently killed many nobles (and their armies) for reasons that were never justified properly, and then attacked and took control of a peaceful kingdom. You know, the cavalry helped build the mountain pass too. They have some pride.

In the face of all this, despite the fierce loyalty of a knight to their ruler... I think the White Cavalry would have to cave and join the Fronteras. I think they'd have a fierce internal fight about it, and they wouldn't be very happy about the choice either way. But Lloyd has shown his good nature many times over, while the queen has failed spectacularly. They know who is right.

But even if the White Cavalry did join the queen again due to knightly loyalty reasons, i think they would take the scenic route home. After all. Lloyd won the fight within 10 days. They can afford an unusually long walk back to the capital.

[real-sun-wukong-fan01]

Hi it's headcannon anon back again!

WUKONG

1. he enjoys weird food combinations such as pickles and ice cream, peanut butter, jelly and cheese and chips and ice cream purely because they remind him of certain fruits or veggies that don't exist anymore

2. Despite living in a cave, he hates spiders and snakes. He doesn't know why it might be the many eyes or the feeling of scales but he doesn't like them

3. He at one point had a crush on change'e purely because of her cooking. He refuses to admit it though and Macaque teases him for it

4. Wukong enjoys brushing out mks hair or fur now? He considers mk to be his son or grandson and enjoys feeding him as well.

5. Used to bathe in hot springs and pretend to be a woman because he was uncomfortable with human males.

MACAQUE

1. He enjoys foods from north and south America because they are bitter, such as salsa, pickles, war heads and others

2. He sleeps with his back to the wall, he doesn't trust someone not to creep up on him after what happened in his life

3. He likes to draw a lot, will often times leave mk drawings on his front door as a gift to show affection.

4. Macaque dyes his fur, it was white but he dyed it black to look cool and edgy or he glamours it up because he is edgy

Also if you reveal one secret about yourself I'll reveal who I truly am, aka my true account on the next post----- sincerely headcannon anon 📜

EVERYBODY CALM HEADCANON ANON IS HERE

- alone, he hates all of those foods, maybe he enjoys some, like pickles or ice cream, but together? They remind him of such good dishes he had back in the day! Has to hide it because if he doesn't they'll call him weird. (He is, but come on.)

- he has a feeling it's because of the many demons related to those animals he fought.

- unlike Zhu bajie, he didn't propose, he simply waited until it cooled down.

- any monkey is his child now.

- he still is uncomfortable with human men, but now he has a shower.

---

- he loves spicy food. Can't say the same for wukong.

- somehow Wukong manages to prank him even from the front. He is no safe.

- he loves to draw because of sun wukong, but there's his own passion in it too. He wishes he was as good as wukong though.

- Wukong called him emo and he still doesn't know what does that mean.

A secret?

I hava a platonic bf.