#pet floors

[rooniearts]

hedgehog eating habits

[pixelatedsnuggles]

Living Room Home Bar Albuquerque Large minimalist open concept living room photo with a bar, gray walls, a metal fireplace, a ribbon fireplace, and a wall-mounted television.

[389]

Inverno, Carlos Floor

[twilightkitkat]

Really stupid idea but can you imagine if the TVA swore Wade and Logan to secrecy and then they come back and everyone is so incredibly confused. Like? Wade, what the fuck? Who is Logan and why is he living with you and why does he look like a dead superhero?

Especially with the insinuation that the entire movie timeline spanned over a few days. So Wade goes from hopelessly pining after his ex to bringing home this buff, hairy, muscular guy to live with him without warning after disappearing from his birthday party.

Like he just randomly walked out the door after blowing out the candles, then he mysteriously reemerged with this feral look-don't-touch beast of a man. And he's calling him stupid pet names like "peanut" and "babygirl" and the guy isn't biting his head off?

When asked, Wade just responds that Logan was his best birthday gift ever. Logan's ears turn pink and he covers his mouth to hide the small smile on his face. Wade wraps an arm around his shoulder and grins. Meanwhile, everyone thinks Wade left his own party because of a hook-up call that somehow ended with him landing himself a boyfriend.

[narwhalsdisguised]

She's just????? Baby??????

[minzbins-moved]

LEE KNOW SKZ CODE, EP.49

[kelocitta]

Can we see the rat king boggling

Heartwarming: Reach your whole arm inside the Rat Pile for no real benefit to yourself!

[fjordfolk]

Pretty sure if you checked my most-uttered phrase every year for the last 10 years would be "no, Sparta."

[minotaurapologist]

Sylvie shoving her head underneath Elwood while he cleans his ear so she can pretend that he’s grooming her. It’s a little funny.

[myxomycota]

plasmodial slime mold by Max Mudie

[inkskinned]

it's just that sometimes you have to love a thing including the ways that it inconveniences you like i keep picking dog hair out of my clothes because he steals things from my laundry basket to lay on them while i'm gone and whenever i use my laptop i have to type with my arms in a parabola to make room for his head on my legs and yes it's kind of a far ride to my mom's house but she always remembers to have dairy-free options available just in case i stop at home and nick lives in another timezone so we have to plan our calls carefully to be sure he's available and i'm not in bed and i hate driving and looking for parking but it means i get to visit my friends and i hate doing dishes but i'll do a million if it means i get to throw a dinner party for everybody and i hate being cold but one time we stood outside in the snow for 5 hours waiting for a concert, bundled up and red-nosed

i always apologize about the ways i take up space even when they're medical like at a restaurant i usually have to take the moment to say i really am allergic, sorry, and feel like i am making everyone around me angry and i always apologize when i am too tired to be funny or when i actually really do need to take care of my human body because it feels like i'm making everything about-me and i always apologize for the ways that i become needy; how i get scared when we're high up (and no for real please get down it actually kind of stops being funny) or how i panic if i hear a loud noise i wasn't expecting or how it's been years but there are days when i'm still doing the same shit, still drowning

the trick about relaxing, i think. like the answer to why i couldn't trust the idea anyone actually likes me. was realizing that at some point i am going to be an inconvenience, which means that at some point i need to trust other people want me to take up space. and yes, some people have to take up a lot of space. but. i relish this little gratitude: making room for people and things in my life. i love picking the dog hairs out of my food - it means i get to have a dog. i love answering the phone at 3 in the morning - it means someone is on the other line, and i can help them weave through life. i love the little chores - it means i have something productive to do. so what if you take up space - it means this world gets to have you.

[bearotonin-international]

Apex predator, my ass. I’m going to pet the dog 🐻🐻‍❄️🐼

perhaps now is a good time for some responsible bear programming to remind everyone that as cute and cuddly as they may seem, bears are lethal apex predators and should absolutely be treated accordingly if ever encountered.

DO

NOT

PET

[beebundt]

fo4 fixation back. mostly nick

[gigas-critters]

Never in my life has a rat let me do anything like this

As my younger sibling said: "playdough rat"

She actually came so close to just falling asleep in my hands

[fiveredlights]

happy 202-five 🥳🥂 (sorry i think i’m hilarious)

as it is new year’s day, it only felt fitting to write a little snippet of glitter on the floor max and daniel celebrating new year’s alone—or so they thought. (1.2k, G)

“I feel like we’ve forgotten something,” Daniel says as Max passes a flute of champagne to him. Below them, the hoards of people wanting to catch a glimpse of the fireworks over Port of Monaco grow louder, as the clock ticks down till midnight. “Or someone.”

Matilda’s stuck in London after her flight was delayed. Lucia’s out with Andie and their friends at some Michelin star restaurant somewhere. Gary and Steve are probably destroying the new chair they got after they destroyed the last one. Molly is sleeping soundly on the sim chair in their office. Daniel’s next to him on their balcony, curled up on the sofa with two blankets and a puffer jacket on him.

(Two blankets because Daniel still refuses to wear shorts even when he’s cold.)

“I think this is the first year in a long time we’re spending New Year’s alone,” Max responds, tucking himself between the couch armrest and Daniel. “So maybe that is why it feels so weird.”

“Yeah, the house is so quiet without the kids. Reminds me of when we first started dating,” Daniel says, balancing the champagne flute on the armrest next to him. “Could do whatever we wanted without two children bickering in the background,” he murmurs, turning to face Max and sliding his frozen hands underneath his shirt.

He nudges a knee between Max’s legs and slots himself on top of him, swinging a leg over his thigh and placing his weight on it. Max reaches up and threads his hands through Daniel’s hair, pulling him down into a kiss but it’s hard to take him seriously when his puffer jacket squeaks at every movement.

“Daniel,” Max murmurs in between their kisses. “Daniel, your jacket.” He tugs on the zipper, trying to get his husband to temporarily part with it when Daniel pulls back.

“Daniel,” he says again. “Your jacket. It makes that sound that you know I do not like.”

“Aw. But I like this jacket,” Daniel pouts, like he doesn’t know that Max has been trying to get rid of it for the past twenty years. Every time it’s in the donation pile it mysteriously finds its way back into their closet, front and centre.

From behind them, there’s a big slam from the front door, before a voice yells down, “I’m fine!”

Max is about to chalk it down to one of their neighbours being drunk and confusing the apartments for one another, when the voice comes echoing down the apartment again, with three knocks on the door.

“Papa! Dad! Can you open the door? I think I broke the lock.” Max and Daniel take one look at each other, before pushing themselves off the couch and making their way down.

Lucia is standing there with a sheepish look on her face, a box of pizza in her hand. Andie’s next to her with a nervous smile. “I tried the code and it wasn’t working, and I left the keys at Andie’s place. Sorry.”

Daniel waves them in, hugging them as they walk past. “All good Luce. Thought you two would stay out longer?”

Gary and Steve immediately saunter down the hallway, tails up in the air and weaving between them. Gary lets out a long perfunctory meow at Andie, who picks him into her arms, bouncing him like a baby. He can hear his purring, even from a distance.

“I just don’t think we’re fine dining people,” Andie explains. She has a finger underneath Gary’s chin, scratching him to his heart’s content. “Plus the restaurant doesn’t have Sir Gaga, does it?”

Lucia pulls a face. “Absolutely not. Sir Gaga is worse than Gazza. I am not letting you name our future children, your track record of names is terrible.”

“Don’t listen to her Sir Gaga,” Andie gasps in mock outrage, walking past her and out to the balcony. “You have a wonderful name, Lucia’s just jealous.”

Molly comes trotting out of the office, sitting herself right in front of Lucia. She shakes her head fondly, following Andie with Molly in tow. “At least you have a normal-ish nickname, don’t you Mozzarella?”

Daniel takes a moment to process Molly’s nickname. “Mozzarella?”

“You named birds, Daniel,” Max says bluntly. “So I am not sure you can talk.”

They’re about to move back to their outdoor couch when the sound of keys jingling in the lock plays. Max opens the door to find Matilda on the other side, two suitcases behind her and slightly frazzled.

“Did you know they wouldn’t let me into the street until I proved I lived at the apartment? And of course none of my ID showed this address—why would it show my parents address—and this cop was such a dick to me,” Matilda rants, yanking her suitcases inside.

“Oh my god, I am never travelling on New Year’s Eve again, that was horrible.” Matilda looks at the door behind her. “Did you change the code?”

Max waves his hand around. “Lucia timed it out. We’ll fix it in the morning.”

The broken door lock offender sticks her head out of the balcony door, pointing at her sister with the pizza box in hand. “Why are you here? I thought you were stuck with Riley in London,” she asks, using air quotes for her back half of the last sentence.

“No, I was actually stuck in London, don’t do the air quotes,” Matilda shoots back. “Why are you here, I thought you and Andie were at that fancy restaurant or whatever with your friends?”

“We got hungry, so we left,” Lucia explains.

“At a restaurant?”

“The portions were really tiny—look, shut up. Maybe I just wanted to eat pizza with my fiancée at home instead of wondering if I was using the right fork or not,” Lucia says pointedly, shaking the box. “Do you want the pizza or are you still judging my restaurant choices?”

Matilda practically vaults over all the living room furniture and snatches the box from Lucia, almost planting herself on top of Andie when she jumps over the back of the outdoor couch.

Andie slides a soft drink across the coffee table towards Matilda, who downs a quarter of the can in one sip.

“What?” Matilda looks around at them. “I refuse to pay for bad airport food, this isn’t a new thing about me.”

“Where’s Riley?” Andie asks instead, passing another soft drink across in preparation. “I thought you two were going to visit his parents in Colorado?”

“Left him in London,” Matilda mumbles through a mouthful of pizza.

“Matilda!” Daniel chastises. “Are you serious?”

“I did ask if he wanted to come, but apparently staying in a hotel overnight was more appealing than flying back here, so.” Matilda shrugs in a way that definitely tells him she’s annoyed at him over it. “Would rather spend the new year with you guys than in some random hotel.”

There’s a silent pact between them to not push too many questions about Riley on Matilda. Max could barely keep up with the way they were bouncing around each other at the very beginning.

They’re all saved from accidentally saying the wrong thing when the fireworks start. Daniel startles with the loud bangs echoing across the sky, scrambling to get his jacket off the floor and pulling the hood over his ears.

“Pretty cool fireworks, right?” Matilda asks, looking over at them. Max stretches his arm over Daniel, pulling them all closer.

Daniel slides his hand into Max’s underneath the blanket, squeezing it three times. “Yeah,” he exhales. “Pretty cool fireworks.”

[barksbog]

honestly every time i entertain the thought of a second dog i remember how destructive baby leon was. i don´t think i could handle another puppy for a hot minute.