#periods awareness

[wild-wombytch]

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A post shared by Mission Locale du Pays d'Auray (@missionlocaleauray)

Final result of the video about periods I participated to with the Mission Locale. I'm sure you totally can't figure out who I am based on who has the worst haircut.

90% of what we said was cut but at least it makes the agony of watching it shorter.

It's in French. If I find a version with subtitles I'll update the post.

It will be useful for only a tiny portion of women here, but hey, if you ever come in Brittany for whatever reason, essentially you can have free period products in any of the Missions Locales 🤷🏻‍♂️ There likely are similar things in other regions as well.

[giantkillerjack]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

[plain-text version of this post can be found under the cut]

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

Plain-text version:

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

P.S. Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

[hollis-art]

au idea... tng but it's set in the 80s and the enterprise is an apartment building rather than a ship

other tenants of the building include: -Picard (the head of the college that Data attends) and Q (no one really knows what he does, he just pops in and out whenever he pleases) -Troi (high school guidance counselor) and Riker (personal trainer) and Worf used to live here too but he moved out -Beverly (still a doctor) and Wesley (burnt out college freshman) -Barclay (works at Blockbusters w/ Data and Geordi) -Guinan (bartender of a secretly gay bar)

the ds9 apartment is a whole other story

[living-with-pmd]

Comic from the Washington Post

[guqqie]

I HAVE GOOD NEWS!!

i finally got my period after 8 months of not having it!! the funny thing is, the only thing that has changed in my diet is that i am having home made smoothies every morning.

which means i’ve been having more fruit.

which means that gynaecologist that told me to completely cut out fruit was wrong.

[grumpytrans]

i don't think we talk about ovarian cysts nearly enough.

ovarian cysts are sacs of fluid that form on the ovary. typically, they are harmless and are even common; many people develop them without knowing as they go away on their own under normal circumstances. but, for some, they don't go away - they can even rupture. these cysts can grow and grow and grow, causing all sorts of problems like extreme pain and surgical removal. when they burst, they can cause internal bleeding enough for a visit to the E.R.

as someone with PCOS - and just had one rupture - cysts are real and potentially dangerous. period and reproductive pain is real and serious. if you experience severe pain during your period or at any time around your reproductive organ area, please seek medical care. here are some resources about ovarian cysts and the issues they can cause.

please please please believe those in your life who experience these things, we are not doing it for attention.

[solarmorrigan]

I have a lot of thoughts about Steve who craves physical affection, who thinks of his worth in terms of what he can do for other people, and who got very drunk at high school parties. This is one of them

CW for heavily implied past dubcon (not between Eddie and Steve). Please take care

-

Eddie has never seen Steve drunk.

At least – not up close. There had been a few high school parties back in the day where Eddie had passed by the “Keg Stand King,” but since he’s come to know Steve personally (intimately), Steve has barely touched alcohol.

He’s told Eddie the story of being drugged against his will and how he doesn’t want to repeat the feeling of losing control, and how he doesn’t like not being able to drive if he needs to, and how the hangover would probably just trigger a migraine anyway – and, really, he just doesn’t drink much anymore.

Yet tonight had been a special occasion: Robin’s birthday. She herself isn’t much for alcohol (for at least some reasons that match up with Steve’s), but drinking, she said, feels like a part of the birthday experience. She’d somehow gotten Steve to match her beer for beer, for “emotional support,” and it hadn’t taken long for the both of them to become entirely inebriated.

Time has apparently greatly eroded Steve’s tolerance.

Eddie had distantly expected him to be kind of a bitchy drunk—and he had become a bit cattier, for sure—but mostly he’d just become affectionate. There had been hugs for nearly everyone, and he’d spent the latter half of the party slowly migrating into Eddie’s lap, plying him with constant kisses on the cheek and giggling ridiculously at nearly everything Eddie had said.

It had been sort of adorable (not that Eddie will tell him that; no, he’s going to sit on that information until it benefits him).

It’s a little less fun now that he’s trying to cart Steve up to his room and into bed. Steve is a bit wobbly, and a lot heavy, and is much more interested in trying to cling to Eddie like a koala and bury his face in Eddie’s neck than he is in actually walking anywhere.

“Y’know, we could cuddle to your heart’s content if you’d just let me get you to bed,” Eddie points out when he and Steve have stalled out partway down the hall, leaning against the closed door to the bathroom.

Steve hums vaguely, tightening the grip he has on Eddie’s t-shirt. “But you’re out here,” he mumbles, nuzzling into the crook of Eddie’s neck.

A shiver travels down Eddie’s spine at the feeling of Steve’s warm breath ghosting across his throat, but it doesn’t go much further than a gentle, dying flutter in his gut. As affectionate as Steve has been, as hungry for contact as he’s acted all night, there’s been nothing sexual about it. It’s been all hugs and sweet kisses, not heated embraces and sloppy make outs.

Besides– Steve’s drunk. Eddie’s not going to take advantage.

He wedges a hand between himself and Steve and gently pushes Steve back.

“I’m coming to bed with you, you colossal dork,” Eddie says.

Steve blinks at Eddie, slightly unfocused. “Oh.” He finally heaves up and away from the wall, grabbing Eddie’s hand to tug him along as he weaves unsteadily down the hall. “Well why didn’t you say so?”

Eddie rolls his eyes, all affection. “Where else would I be going?”

Steve stops when they get to his room, apparently pondering the answer.

“Away?” he finally volunteers, half-questioning, as if he’s hoping he’s wrong.

“No, baby,” Eddie assures him immediately, leaning in to give him a quick kiss. “I’m staying. Gotta make sure you don’t choke on your tongue after you pass out, anyway.”

“’m not that drunk,” Steve says; he rolls his eyes and then immediately seems to regret it, reaching out for Eddie’s shoulder to steady himself.

“Uh huh,” Eddie drawls. “Okay, time for bed, big boy.”

Grumbling, Steve releases Eddie to shuffle over to the bed, where he flops down on his back with a sigh, jeans and all.

“Alright, not exactly what I meant, but I can work with this,” Eddie says, kneeling on the bed by Steve’s hip.

They’d managed to ditch their shoes in the entryway, but they’re otherwise fully dressed, and Steve is going to be uncomfortable if he tries to spend the whole night in his belt and jeans.

Steve squirms a bit when Eddie reaches for his belt buckle, as if he’s not quite sure whether to move away or not.

“Eddie…” he groans – an exasperated sort of groan, rather than the usual way he groans Eddie’s name when he’s squirming on the bed.

“Just hold still,” Eddie shushes him with a quick pat to the hip.

He gets as far as pulling the tongue of the belt through the buckle before Steve’s hands shoot out and grab Eddie by the wrists. His grip is surprisingly strong, considering how uncoordinated he’d been tonight, and Eddie stills immediately.

“Steve?” Eddie looks up to see Steve staring down at him, wide-eyed and apprehensive; hell, if Eddie didn’t know any better, he might say Steve looks… sort of frightened.

“Not– not tonight,” Steve says, enunciating carefully, and Eddie’s confusion only increases.

He doesn’t want his belt off tonight? Is that what he’s worked up about?

In the wake of Eddie’s baffled lack of response, Steve only grows more insistent, tugging Eddie’s hands away from his waist.

“Not while I’m–” Steve breaks off, licking his lips nervously. He shakes his head and adds quietly, “Please.”

Brows furrowed, Eddie stares at Steve a second longer. “Not while you’re…?” Then the penny drops, and Eddie jerks away from Steve so quickly that Steve barely has time to let go. “Oh shit, no. That’s not– no, I’m not– Steve, fuck, no, that’s not what I’m doing.”

Steve stares up at Eddie, the anxiety he’s a little too drunk to mask still lingering in his eyes.

“I promise, I was only trying to get your belt and pants off so you’d be more comfortable. For sleeping!” Eddie says quickly. “But you can keep them on if you want. Hell, put on more layers. Do you want a jacket?”

Distantly, Eddie realizes he’s rambling and tries to stop; it doesn’t seem to be helping.

“I– I know I was kissing you,” Steve says, then glances away with a grimace, seeming a bit more sober now. “Practically throwing myself at you. ’m sorry, I just–”

“Don’t be sorry. Don’t be,” Eddie says firmly. “Even if you were throwing yourself at me—even though you weren’t; like, I can tell the difference between cuddly you and horny you, okay?—but even if you had been, you can still say no. You can always say no. But I swear, Steve, I was only trying to get you comfy, that’s all.”

For a moment, Steve just breathes, processing Eddie’s words as carefully as his sloshed brain will allow.

“Are you still going to stay?” he finally asks. “Even though I don’t want to have sex?”

“Of course,” Eddie blurts, some dizzying combination of baffled, anxious, and incensed. “I’m only gonna leave if you tell me to.”

And even then, he’d only go as far as the couch downstairs (just in case).

Slowly, Steve nods, then reaches for his belt to pull it off in a series of determined, clumsy movements. He drops it on the floor when he’s done but makes no move to remove his jeans.

Eddie, following suit, resigns himself to an uncomfortable night. He strips off his jewelry and his own belt but leaves his pants on.

All the lights go out, save for a small, dim lamp on Steve’s desk, and then Eddie crawls on top of the covers with Steve, pulling the blanket from the end of the bed—a gift from Claudia—up over both of them.

A little of the churning, anxious mess in Eddie’s chest eases when Steve immediately plasters himself to his side, resting his head on Eddie’s chest (and Eddie just knows there’s going to be drool there come morning, but he can’t bear to move him). All the same, even as he hears Steve’s breathing even out into sleep, Eddie can’t get his mind to rest.

What has he done to give Steve the impression that he’d try to fuck him when he’s too drunk to really say yes? What has he done to make him think he’d leave if Steve doesn’t put out?

Nothing.

Genuinely and truly, Eddie can’t think of anything. There have been plenty of times they’ve hung out, even shared a bed, and they haven’t had sex. Sure, they’re active, but they do actually do other things together.

There have been other nights where sex has seemed like a sure thing, only to be halted by an apologetic look from Steve and the start of a migraine. There have been times Eddie’s called it off because his anxiety has reared up and bit him in the ass. There’s never been anger over it.

That leaves two options: it’s either an imagined scenario stirred up by anxiety and insecurity and alcohol, or… it’s based on a different experience, in a different time and place.

All things considered, Eddie has a terrible, sinking feeling that he knows which one it is.

[moliathh]

the scorpion and the frog

[xiaolanhua]

In Blossom 花间令 (2024) Dir. Zhong Qing – Ep. 21

[mytwotragicgaymen]

Arthur getting glasses

At some point Merlin notices that Arthur's vision is not as sharp as it used to be (how long can one stare at the King squinting at his reports) and ushers Arthur to get glasses.

For the longest time Arthur refuses, saying that he does not need them. This turns into an unspoken understanding in which Merlin always stands right behind Arthur in meetings and covers for him so that others don't notice.

Unfortunately this doesn't last long as people do start to notice and suggest their King to get glasses. Reluctantly, Arthur finally agrees and gets a pair.

And Merlin loves how they look on him. The first time he saw Arthur put them on, Arthur mistook Merlin's shocked expression for ridicule and, for a while, despite Merlin's constant reassurance, was self-conscious about wearing them. Merlin constantly catches himself staring at how Arthur fidgets with his glasses and thinks its the sexiest cutest thing ever.

Arthur always tries to "forget" them and Merlin always remembers to carry them with him.

Of course after a while Arthur gets used to them, but since Merlin was always to the one to carry them around, he actually forgets them all the time now.

[lokisrealpurpous]

cramps

loki x reader with endometriosis

warnings: mention of blood, mentions of periods, extremely bad period pain.

lokis fiancé has always struggled with her endometriosis, the pain leading her every month to passing out, throwing up or sometimes even in hospital and he dreaded knowing there was nothing he could do, but he finds a way.

this is for all my endometriosis girlies , as someone who has it themselves I wish it was spoke about more and that doctors didn't neglet it so much, getting forced to go on the pill and never given a remedy since 10yrs old is a horrible experience. My heart goes out to you all. If you'd like more like this, maybe small headshots of him looking after you in hospital or how he reacts when you faint, then please send requests or comment x

Loki's pov

I had arrived late from the mission I had so desperately been trying to get back from after seeing the 4 missed calls and 18 text messages left from my fiancé. I couldn't check the messages, being in a jet so high up there was only little WiFi, which was all being used by stark, so I sat in the back anxiously, merely muttering a word as i begged the trusted gods above me to keep her safe before I get to her.

I knocked gently before bursting into our bedroom, I was frantic and worried, adrenaline rushing through my veins before I stilled, seeing her lay on the bed, curled around a hot water bottle. Her face was flushed red, and her teeth were gritted. Her hair was a mess, and the blankets her tangled around her. The pill bottle on the side was empty, and the sickbowl on the other was not.

"heya dove..."

I whisper, slowly coming up beside the bed, pulling down some of the blanket that covered her pale but flustered face teasingly before sitting beside her, bringing her weak form in my arms and kissing her forehead.

"is it your cramps?"

I whisper again, running my hands through her knotted hair, untangling it gently.

She nods slowly against my chest, finally looking up at me so I could see her entire face. It was tearburnt and swollen.

"Oh darling..."

I take her face in my hands, rubbing her cheek softly with my thumb. I lift her up, bringing her further into my lap and wrapping my arms around her waist as they find her lower abdomen, I massage the area gently while kissing her neck.

"This good?"

I mumble and she nods again, leaning against my chest. I felt the guilt twist in my stomach that I wasn't able to get here earlier during her flare up, I was proud she managed to find her medication and get herself a sickness bowl, but the thought of her having to do all that while in absolute agony, then to be sick without me to hold her hair and rub her stomach, i never wanted to leave her side again.

"I was fine."

I hear her croak out.

"I don't always need my knight in shining armour my love, I know how to take care of myself."

I let a sigh of relief before kissing her neck, still massaging her lower stomach.

"I know princess, I just worry."

She chuckles, turning her head up to kiss my lips, then laying between my legs, her head resting on my chest, humming as I eased the tension in her belly.

It didn't take long for her fall asleep on top of me, and not long for myself either once switching off the crystal lamp beside us.

your pov 2:27am

I sat up, taking in the shadows of darkness that surrounded me as I reached across my lover's body to turn on the bedside lamp.

my hand flies to my mouth as I let out a groan of pain, not at all wanting to wake loki up, then slipping out of his embrace towards the bathroom until I realised the sheets and my brand new baby-pink nightgown.

'shit shit shit'

I mutter, stood in the middle of the dimly lit room, clutching onto my stomach as tears begin to well in my eyes.

I cover my mouth with both my hands now, pressing hard to stop the sobs escaping. The pain was unbearable as I held onto my dresser, my new gown and sheets were stained crimson, loki layed right next to the mess on our mattress, I had no medication left and I would not make it down the stairs to make myself a bottle.

wake him up.

I kept telling myself, but I couldn't bring myself to do so.

Before I could act upon a single thought, however, a wave of nausea crashed over me as the pain stabbed at my stomach, feeling as if my uterus was collapsing in on itself. I desperately ran to the toilet, holding onto the seat and puking into the bowl. My stomach churned and tightened as I gagged.. another meal rising up my throat.

Every spiralling worry stopped when I felt his hands run through my hair, pulling it out my face and using the band that was in just in his hair to tie mine in a tight ponytail.

He knelt beside me, rubbing my back and whispering things I couldn't make sense of at the moment with the pain still cursing me.

"Loki..."

I sob, gagging over the toilet but not being sick.

He continued rubbing, kissing my head and making sure I'm sat comftable, I didn't even realise how he had put me in his lap.

"nghh.."

I groan, holding onto my stomach, my hands gripping and the area and pulling and pushing, I didn't know what I was doing but I just wanted the pain off... I couldn't bare it...

"Lokiiiiii"

I groan again, my voice strained in pain.

"P...please"

My voice cracks, tears spilling down my cheeks. Once he realised my scratching hands, he pulled them away slowly, replacing them with his own and massaging again.

I let out a whimper of pain.

"Shhh shh shh... trust me my darling, just relax"

He coos, rocking me side to side in his arms.

My eyes suddenly widen as I feel his palms heat up to the perfect temputure as he continues kneeding my skin.

I whine, leaning against him, the pain fading with every movement of his huge hands that now had mine wrapped around them. He dosent stop, just whispering words of affirmation in my ears and swaying me with himself as my eyes began to flutter shut, my body finally feeling at ease and calm.

"That's it..."

I hear him whisper as he lifts me in his arms, hands still on my belly..

"You're okay love, ive got you"

He says as he lies me in a bed, the sheets changed and fresh, and a new nightgown dressing my body with the flash of a small green light.

How he does it I will never know but I do know that him, and his mother's parenting, will always be there to guide me through terrible nights like this.

"I love you Lo..." I whisper as I feel my body sink into the mattress and a kiss on my lips, large arms wrapping around my waist.

"I love you more, my darling.."

He replies with another kiss, then turns the lamp off, keeping his hands on my abdomen throughout the early morning till dawn.

[stozkpile]

The charms are here! <- (Etsy link)

To reiterate what I said on Twitter: there should be enough charms for everyone that filled the form out but I may not be able to restock them for a while (in the event they all get sold), so seize the opportunity if you want one!

(EDIT: My shop got put on vacation mode - I'm going to contact Etsy to get this resolved ASAP)

(EDIT 2: My shop is active again! Yay!)

[ca77um-ilo77]

Madness the price paid for your molten alchemy. Metal. Planet. God.

[x x x x]

Part of the Elemental Haiku series by @simmyfrobby

[sleepsucks]

[razberrypuck]

"I can't wait for you to figure out [troy's] real name and intentions" could mean so many fucking things too this is going to drive me insane. like he could be a robot he could've taken the place of The Real troy lougferd he could be posing as a son that mr lougferd never actually had his first name might just not be troy. like bizly what do you mean REAL NAME and REAL INTENTIONS what the fuck. he's a sneaky bastard doing sneaky bastard shit.

[queerandherewithgoodnews]

Happy Intersex Awareness Day!

Today, the 26th of October, is Intersex awareness day. Celebrate all the intersex peeps and raise attention to the struggles they face!

End intersex genital surgery and other forced invasive measures now!