#percy is such a shithead

[lilislegacy]

annabeth: can i be frank with you?

percy: uh sure, but don’t you think that might get confusing? unless zhang changes his name too, of course. yes, this could work

annabeth:

grover: can i still be grover?

percy: shh! let frank speak

annabeth: *deeply questioning her life choices*

[caspersscareschool]

a 16 year old today told me i dress like percy jackson and talk like nico di angelo

[aki-bara]

The tags prove you missed the point. Percy is not "just" a house husband. He is a man who has served his time, changed the world, fought, and protected, and his reward is being able to stay at home with his beautiful children and/or pets and extended family and help them in the way he wants (personally), beholden to nobody.

People who choose to stay home aren't "just" staying at home. They aren't making a decision to be lesser, they are deciding that the most important things in their life (at current) are the people who live in their home. They are dedicating themselves to helping and being with those people whenever and however possible. Personal ambition is meaningless to them if it doesn't allow them to care for the people most in need of their love and protection.

This is something to be praised, not viewed with disdain.

This may be controversial, but Percy would not be a stay at home trophy husband. He would study oceanography at New Rome and then he'd work at an aquarium, probably with a focus on education and outreach. He'd be a docent, leading tour groups of school kids around and teaching them about the sea animals and ecosystems and environmental stewardship. And he and Annabeth would train demigods at Camp Half-blood during the summer.

[thevoiceofwrath]

I'm waiting for the third book in The Broken Earth trilogy to be available to me through Libby, someone's taking their whole 14 day book loan to read it I guess, so I'm trying to slog through the first book of P*rcy Jackson in the meantime. I've always meant to read the series. It's a beloved YA series, it should be decent right? And there's a show coming out soon so I figured I might as well finally go for it. I tell you what, it's miserable. Did I miss my window of opportunity to enjoy it? If I'd read it in 2005 would I have liked it? Idk. Mostly it seems like the author just really, really hates fat people????????? And as a fat person, I'm having a terrible time. I read two fantasy novels and several hundred thousand words of fanfic in the time it's going to take me to read this one miserable book. Does it get better? God I hope it gets better.

[lizlovestofangirl]

have you ever considered a coquette! gf and luke 👉🏻👈🏻 teeheeeee 🌷🎀🤍 ur smaus give me a purpose in life and a will to live 🥹

"my good looking boy"

luke castellan x daughterofaphrodite!coquette!reader

smau - luke loves his girl so much he lets her walk him like a dog (but coquettley )

🎧 - good looking by suki waterhouse

a/n: ahhhh i love this request! (btw u give me a will to live) i can just picture luke being difficult with everyone else and then letting his girl put bows in his hair and like him sleeping in her fancy pink bed AHHHH IM DYING (also percabeth is PERCABETHING in this)

*possible swearing and suggestive content, not checked so there could be mistakes*

--------------------------------------------------------

liked by silenaaaa, iamchrisrodriguez, and others

yn_yln he loves bows now

tagged itslukecastellan

view comments:

larueclarisse LMAO U HAVE HIM WHIPPED

yn_yln 🐕‍🦺

iamchrisrodriguez LMFAOOOOO

_groverunderwood yikes luke you just got called a dam dog

percy.jackson me personally id never take that

whosannabeth yes you would

percy.jackson yes i would

itslukecastellan and im the whipped one??

percy.jackson stfu

larueclarisse marry me??? 💍

yn_yln I DO

itslukecastellan what 🙂

silenaaaa SO CUTE Y/N

yn_yln YOU SEL

itslukecastellan i ❤️ my gf

yn_yln i ❤️ my bf

silenaaaa I CANNOT W THIS I LOVE LOVE

itslukecastellan where are my photo creds for the first picture????

yn_yln photo credits for the first picture go to this little shit head

whosannabeth @percy.jackson you'd take that too shithead

percy.jackson yeah...

yn_yln 🐕‍🦺

_groverunderwood that dam bow

yn_yln still concerned about the timing of this original joke

percy.jackson @itslukecastellan wheres ur dignity man

itslukecastellan 🤷

whosannabeth IGNORE PERCY THIS IS THE CUTEST THING IVE EVER SEEN

yn_yln i ❤️ my annabeth

itslukecastellan i thought you ❤️ me?

yn_yln know your place pretty boy

rachel.edare coquette bf

yn_yln duh gotta match the aesthetic

hi_imtyson 🎀

yn_yln MISS YOU TYSON

larueclarisse where can i get one of those shirts?

iamchrisrodriguez please dont answer that

yn_yln i'll send you the link 😘

iamchrisrodriguez shit

liked by whosannabeth, clarisselarue, and others

itslukecastellan she thinks im pretty (ft. this week's flowers)

tagged yn_yln

view comments:

iamchrisrodriguez STOP UR KILLING MY RELATIONSHIP

itslukecastellan just do better chris

yn_yln yeah be like luke (this is the only time you will ever hear this advice from anyone)

larueclarisse hello is want flowers too???!?!??

yn_yln lmao

silenaaaa where do u find one of this kind

yn_yln the pound go for the ones w daddy AND mommy issues

itslukecastellan jesus y/n

yn_yln 😊😊

percy.jackson ur ugly

itslukecastellan ur uglier

percy.jackson nuh uh

itslukecastellan yuh huh

percy.jackson nuh uh

itslukecastellan yuh huh

whosannabeth ignore percy. again.

itslukecastellan ive gotten very good at it

larueclarisse REAL

iamchrisrodriguez not real clar he pisses u tf off

larueclarisse 💐???

_groverunderwood those dam bows again

percy.jackson HAHAHAAHA

yn_yln pretty sure thats a laugh of trauma

itslukecastellan quit grover

yn_yln i love you

itslukecastellan is love you more

yn_yln WHERE ARE MY PHOTO CREDS FOR THE SECOND PICTURE??? HMMM???

itslukecastellan this little rat took the second photo

rachel.edare 🐕‍🦺

itslukecastellan i hate you 🙂

yn_yln's story

view reply from percy.jackson:

percy.jackson im holding this against him forever

yn_yln good pls do

view reply from itslukecastellan:

itslukecastellan youre lucky i love you or else i would not let you expose me like this

yn_yln love you too castellan

view reply from larueclarisse:

larueclarisse IM CRYING

larueclarisse YOU SHOULDVE SEEN THE LOOK ON HIS AND CHRIS'S FACES WHEN THEY SAW THIS

larueclarisse LUKE TURNED EVERY SHADE OF RED AND CHRIS LOOKED LIKE HE MIGHT SHIT A BRICK

yn_yln LMAOOOO

view reply from silenaaaa:

silenaaaa y/n you cant have other campers in our cabin

yn_yln but you love love

silenaaaa fair

silenaaaa wait

silenaaaa wait what kind of love 😏

yn_yln JEEZ NOT THAT KIND

yn_yln just posted a story

view reply from itslukecastellan:

itslukecastellan im blushingggg

yn_yln good

view reply from iamchrisrodriguez:

iamchrisrodriguez Y/N STOPPPP

yn_yln no

view reply from whosannabeth:

whosannabeth how much do u think i'll have to pay percy to do this?

yn_yln nothing hed do anything for u

whosannabeth oh wait true

[sunnytobio]

they’re so hamfisty with the way they tell you that the gods are “bad”. it’s a slow realization for the reader to recognize that luke is right—though the way he goes about change isnt, but even then luke is the catalyst for the change percy suggests to the gods. all that is to say, the book drips this to you—by showing you zeus’s wrath, and hades being an outcast, and hermes mismanagement of his son, and dionysus being a shithead, and hera being a shithead, and ares purposefully riling people up because he thinks it’s funny, and aphrodite playing with percy’s love life, and the way the gods punished calypso for something she did not do, etc.

meanwhile, the show has EVERY OTHER SCENE being “fuck the gods!! they suck!!! they’ve never done anything for me!!! fuck you!!!” OKAY??? WE GET IT?? stop wasting my precious minutes on something you’ve already said 30x and please actually get the scenes right ?? 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼

[whatohitsonfirewelp]

Bringing this back because of the show

You know while I do think Percy is incredibly powerful I still don’t think Ares was going full out when he fought Percy in the first book.

Like Percy was so unbelievably inexperienced still, it makes zero sense that he’d be able to pretty much beat a god when he still had trouble with monsters.

Like, yes he was by the ocean which absolutely helped him and he absolutely did better than most demigods would but I also think Ares was fucking with him.

This is the god of war, he wants Percy angry. He wants him bloodthirsty and to be a fucking true beast while fighting. But I don’t think he’s ever intended to kill him then, Percy was still a child of one of the big three and Zeus would be upset if only because he didn’t get to do it himself. We know all of them (particularly the sons) are fearful of Zeus.

Like I definitely don’t think he expected Percy to do that well and have that much power but at the end of the day I truly believe Ares was not giving it his all and was mostly fucking with Percy for shits and giggles.

Now, I definitely believe Percy could beat him in a fight now or at least get very close to it with Ares going full out. But then? Nah, Ares saw a chance to mess with a moody sarcastic little shit of a twelve year old and took it

[incorrect-percabeth-quotes]

Percy: I'm breaking up with you.

Annabeth: You'll never find anyone else like me!

Percy: That's the point, shithead!

This was inspired by someone else's post. If the OG blogger wants this taken down, I will remove it.

[luffyslawyer]

you know, one thing about Poseidon and Typhon both being known as 'Father of Monsters' and 'Father of All Monsters' respectively, I imagine Typhon would purposely being a shithead to spite Poseidon by flirting with Percy right in front of him.

Percy: Daddy, can you pass me the salt?

Poseidon and Typhon reaching out to grab the salt, then looked at each other.

Poseidon: wtf

Typhon: what?? we're both daddies, aren't we??

Percy's siblings, mainly Chrysaor: DYINGGG

Poseidon: wtf are you talking about

Typhon: listen pal, you ain't the only guy who fathers monsters here. I'd say Perseus here is a monster too judging by his powers alone but he's mighty fine to be called as such. Perhaps if he and I could just make babies—

Poseidon: STFU!!! STOP RIGHT THERE!! I'LL KILL YOU!!

Percy's siblings: *suffering*

Chrysaor: STOPP I CAN'T GET THE IMAGE OUT OF MY HEAD!!

Kymopoleia: why are you even imagining it lmao

Percy, is confused: I'm flattered and all I guess,, but why is the literal Bane of Olympus doing here,, in Atlantis,, like this is our family dinner??

[iovealexivs]

it is actually fucking unreal how many people miss the signs of abuse and think gabe is any less of a shithead in the pjo show and think he’s less deserving of his ending.

you all need to do some thinking and educate yourselves on what abuse looks like. while physical domestic violence is common it is not the only form of abuse, and people responsible for DV are often very good at covering their tracks to everyone else, sometimes even including victims, which makes it harder to leave. they could be charismatic and respectful, or even just some deadbeat leeching off of another full grown adult that doesn’t seem “that” awful. not all abuse is obvious, or physical, at first glance unless you’ve lived it or know the signs. people like this, ignoring glaring obvious signs in this case, are showing the same mentality as the CPS agents that let children, including my best friend, die because they didn’t see a parent as “abusive” until it was too late just because physical needs were met (sometimes just barely) and the child wasn’t getting beaten.

stop downplaying abuse. he clearly has a emotional hold over sally (and financial, and maybe physical, if they stay true to when percy finds out about that towards the end of the book). that’s still pretty traumatic, coming from someone who’s experienced that and has CPTSD from it. the show doesn’t invalidate survivors of physical abuse or downplay what an awful person Gabe is because it’s showing another form. it isn’t erasure of DV. please. PLEASE educate yourselves. this is scary.

given what we know about medusa now and her experience with being manipulated and whatnot it would make even better sense for sally to kill him.

[crithaus]

if he really wanted us to hate him he wouldn't have made him geek out so hard over the feywild or be besties with Keyleth the team moral barometer, that's tal's own fault

I feel like Tal wanted us to hate Percy but he made him sexy so

[snoelledarts]

Hey you! Leave me some Percy Jackson related requests or funny headcannons in my asks and I might just draw them because I have a few days off in a row and I am chomping at the bit to draw more.

Preferably PJO stuff related to one of these things:

Any of the PJO characters as college students or adults (the idea of all of them at 20yrs old is so funny)

Nico di Angelo, my son

Will Solace, my other son

Solangelo

Percabeth

Jason and Percy's terrible bromance

My favorite badly coordinated polycule: Jason/Piper/Annabeth/Percy

Percy and Nico's no good terrible shithead cousin relationship

Anything PJO TV show related

See you in my inbox ! <3

[phykios]

Do you think expectant/new dad!Percy went to Paul for advice? Cause Poseidon wouldn't be a great source of how to be a normal/present/mortal dad. Headcanons?

been thinking about this literally all day

OF COURSE percy went to paul, not just because paul is best dad but also because estelle was born literally like two or three years prior and paul and sally might still have some baby stuff they can donate

at the very least they have multiple late night convos that end up lasting until 3 or 4, because even tho paul is an early to bed kind of guy, percy has been seriously repressing just how scared he is, bc for the longest time, all he knew about fatherhood was either a) shithead abusive dick or b) absent, not-sure-if-i-want-to-claim-you-yet nonhuman who kind of sometimes sees percy more as a weapon than a person

percy: i just--i haven't had enough time with you to know how to be a good father

paul: 🥺🥺🥺🥺😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[tidaltow]

Percy has one of those stop-dead-in-your-tracks, miniature heart-attacks just then. His brain trips over itself, tumbles in probably a million somersaults—and for a split second, the only clear thought in his head is Uh oh. But, hey, before you say anything, it has nothing to do with being talked back to. No, Percy expects that. Heck, he pretty much encourages it most days.

Instead, it has everything to do with a fleeting feeling of familiarity. So much so that he has to perform a double-take, look back again to check . . .

It’s not Annabeth. (As much as it sounded like her for a moment.)

He’s not gonna die.

Well. Jury’s out on that second part.

“Yeah, I’m asking you that question now that you’re putting up a whole fuss about it. If you wanna talk about bullshitting . . . ” he says once he’s recovered from his little internal panic. At least in that aspect. Another one is still in progress. “Look, I don’t got time to—” It’s unfair how quickly and unavoidably emotions can escalate: from panic to annoyance to frustration to anger all in one fell swoop, it seems. But Percy clenches his jaw. He lets out a huff and meets Elle’s gaze as calmly as possible.

“It’s Grover.” The way he announces that makes it sound like that’s all the explanation she’s getting, or definitely just all she needs. He ends up saying more. “I don’t know where he is. I can’t get a hold of him. I had dreams last night because, y’know, of course I did. Why would the dreams just stop, like— Who wants a break right? Not me.” Percy throws his hands up, rolls his eyes at the sky like this is Zeus’s doing. “And, no. I don’t have a plan, in case you’re wondering. I’m just— I’m not about to just sit around until I come up with one.”

"Only things I heard? The sound of you being rude to me for no reason at all. Oh, and the sound of you asking." The interruption, she can deal with. That's part and parcel of being at a camp filled to the brim with demigods and demi-titans. The dismissive handwaving? Not so much. He does that again? She'll steal his hand and (softly) whack him upside the head.

"You said, verbatim: 'Now, c'mon. Or do you just plan on standing there?' and that's a question if I ever heard one. You can't bullshit a witch, Perseus." Slowly, Elle makes her way towards him. "Instead of shoving your manners to the side, how about you just clue me in on what you want from me, yeah? That makes things easier for everyone involved. 'Cause you sure as shit don't look like you need a truth tincture with the way you've been spilling it."

[toshidou]

oddly specific british hcs . . .

characters // the 141 (simon "ghost" riley, john "soap" mactavish, kyle "gaz" garrick, john price)

an // don't ask me what this is, because i really don't have an answer for you. my brain just spat this out at me mid walk and for some reason i decided to post it here. i am so sorry.

Simon "Ghost" Riley

He's scared shitless of Year 7s, despite knowing full well that he was one of those little bastards when he was a kid. Not much puts the fear of god into him, yet something about a group of little shitheads who think they own the world has him crossing to the other side of the street at the sight of them.

Got suspended from school one time for stealing one of the dildo's from the RE classroom and supergluing to the seat of the kid who tried to bully him.

Got good grades at school. Not because he put in the effort, but because he stole all the exam answers from his teachers desk and spent the night before the exam memorising it all. "Work smarter not harder" was his motto.

Once got lost in a Primark. He was only looking for some cheap sleep wear, and ending up somewhere stuck between rows of Disney clothes and screaming children on leashes.

Has an unhealthy obsession with Monster energy drinks, he once drank so many in a row he went temporarily blind in his left eye. Still drinks them to this day.

John "Soap" Mactavish

He once had a full on mental breakdown in ALDI because the cashier was scanning things too quickly and he couldn't keep up.

Has started several fights in pubs because someone insulted Iron-Bru, both Simon and Price have had to drag him out of nearly all of them kicking and screaming garbled Scottish insults.

Used to dip his sherbet dib dab in dirt as a kid.

Once got in trouble in maths class for spelling "80085" on his calculator and laughing so hard he pissed himself.

The only time he laughed that hard again was when the Queen kicked the bucket. Price looked nothing short of disturbed.

If one more person comes up to him and yells "DISGUSTANG" in an exaggerated and shit Scottish accent, he's going to commit serial arson.

Kyle "Gaz" Garrick

Went to private school, and gets bullied for it by the entire 141 as soon as they find out. They rib him even harder after they find out he was head boy.

Got invited to a night out in London by one of his rich acquaintances from school, which ended up being The Box. That night single-handedly gave him more PTSD than any mission he's ever been on.

Has personal beef with Percy Pig after he almost choked to death on one, and to this day he will never live it down that Ghost had to give him the Heimlich.

Has an unhealthy addiction to the Spice Girls. Sometimes he forgets he lives on a military base and still sings "Wannabe" at full volume in the showers. He's had to swear Soap to secrecy on numerous occasions.

His favourite Spice Girl is Scary Spice.

Captain John Price

His biggest guilty pleasure is listening to Take That. He'd first heard them first thanks to his mother being worryingly obsessed, and started mockingly singing along to their songs on brief phone calls from his barracks after he'd first joined. Little did he know that soon he too would unironically love their music. And yes, he cried when Robbie left the band. It's a secret he's taking to the grave.

Hates Waitrose with a burning passion, he once threw a fit over the price of a packet of peanuts and scared the middle-aged woman and her baby two aisles down.

Saw Gaz choking on a Percy Pig, and then proceeded to buy him every available Percy Pig related merchandise for Christmas.

Loves vinegar on his chips from the chippy, and when he found out the smell makes Soap gag, suddenly he loves his chips drowning in it.

[wheretheresawillsolacetheresaway]

we've got a girl/boy pair for each of the big three (jason & thalia, nico & hazel) but no female daughter of neptune or posidian, (althought we have tyson), this leave the door open for the next two pjo books to give percy a(nother) sister! I lowkey want like a frozen in time or something sister that he finds on his godly side and now hes got to deal with the fact that his dads an asshole and he had a whole sister just trapped somewhere. wheres my chronogically older sister whose younger but still treats percy like he's her shithead little brother.

honsetly though percy does have younger sibling/middle child energy and you can't argue with me.