#people were more accepting of things that weren't the norm

[madlori]

I'm asking this to you because you're the only person I know who's been around fandoms for so long — do you find this shipping-situation weird? I've been in many fandoms but I've never really seen this insistence on there being only one acceptable ship for a character and encouraging the idea that anything other than the norm is almost sacrilegious. Almost every big fandom over the years have had multiple conflicting pairings, take for example, Marvel. Even works of media that have a canon romantic pairing have had fans who ship others with the leads (that was what shipping was tbh) and no one has ever shown up to their doorsteps with pitchforks in hand, at least not that I'm aware of. So I guess I'd really like your opinion on why you think this is happening now? Have things always been this way, just not in plain sight? Is this just the new fandom culture that is developing now with the influx of younger people? Or is this fandom an aberration where a group of people are so used to being the majority that they simply aren't taking well to things not going their way?

I've been thinking about this today, and I'm still not sure what I think.

I've been in fandoms with a hugely dominant ship before. I've been in fandoms that had ship wars. I've been in fandoms with a lot of peacefully co-existing ships. I'm not sure this fandom is really all that different. To answer your first question, no, I don't find it all that weird. In fact I sort of expected it.

Let me tell you a story about the Brokeback Mountain fandom, which managed to have a ship war despite having really only one ship, the canon ship. So BBM fic fell into several broad categories, the biggest of which were fix-the-ending/canon divergence fics and the straight-up AU fics (I wrote one of each, lol). Post-canon fics weren't as common, because you had to deal with one half of the canon pairing being...well, dead.

There was a post-canon fic that gained a lot of fans...and when I say "fic" that's really an understatement. It was a SAGA, and I don't use that term lightly. It was a series of like...6 or 7 epic 100K+ word fics and it was over a million words total. The author would put out more than one 5K chapters per DAY. I'm still in awe of this woman's output. But it was the content that created the issue.

(Brief recap for those who have not seen BBM - two ranch hands in the 1960s, Ennis (Heath Ledger) and Jack (Jake Gyllenhaal) spend a season herding sheep together, have sex, form a bond, then separate to go about their expected hetero lives but get together for fishing trips every year or so to have sex and spend time together. Jack wants more, Ennis is terrified. Both marry and have families. Eventually Jack dies in what is implied to be a gay-bashing but who knows, and Ennis makes his peace with the love he'd felt for him)

The saga picked up a couple of years after the film's events. Ennis decides to tentatively explore what being queer means, goes to Laramie, finds a gay bar, and very cautiously enters. Through a Series of Events he gets mixed up in an assault there and befriends a local sheriff's deputy, who is also gay. They begin a relationship.

Now, this series was COMPLEX. A huge cast of characters, a long and thorough evolution of this relationship, a lot of angst over Jack's memory, and it really worked for a LOT of readers. The new love interest she created was a really great character.

For others...it did not work and they hated it.

The animosity between fans who loved this saga and those that did not grew pretty heated. This was like '05 so there was no twitter or tumblr, this was all on LJ and dedicated fandom forums (some of which banned discussion of this fic for this reason), but there was doxxing and namecalling and real vitriol.

I guess my point in all this is that when there's strong feelings, some fans will find a way to be horrible to each other.

I was in the Sherlock fandom, another fandom 98% dominated by one ship. There were other ships, but somehow they seemed to co-exist mostly peacefully barring some snide remarks and rude comments (I could be wrong about this, if you asked someone who shipped a non-Johnlock ship they might have a different answer). No, the insanity in the Sherlock fandom was not ship-war-related.

I was also in the Criminal Minds fandom, which has a whole bunch of disparate ships and no ship wars that I can recall.

Then there are other fandoms, like Avatar, with TERRIBLE ship wars that are still going on.

I don't think the situation in 9-1-1 is as unique or different from other fandom wanks as has sometimes been asserted. I think terrible fandom wars are sort of inevitable, whether they're ship related or not. But for what it's worth, here are some of my thoughts on what's going on here.

A loooooong time (5.5 seasons) with one very dominant non-canonical queer ship. No other ship really ever approached the level of saturation or devotion of Buddie.

A pervasive belief that this ship might possibly become canon. That's a feature a lot of other ships do not have.

A lack of intense devotion to any of the other love interests. BuckTaylor was never a challenger to Buddie. Neither was Eddie and Shannon, or anybody else. It's hard to fight when there's no worthy challenger.

But now? BuckTommy is not only canon, but it has a lot of fans. It's a threat. And it's not only a threat in a feelings kind of way (as in, people like a thing that is not the thing I like and it makes me upset) but there's a perception that it's an ACTUAL threat, as in if people like this ship and promote it, it could cause it to become a permanent relationship (the degree to which fan response actually affects how the show unfolds is...debatable).

I do not personally think this is the case, but some fans strongly believe that Buddie could still happen if it weren't for BuckTommy. So if you're still wanting Buddie and believe it will or could happen, the existence of an alternate love interest represents a direct obstacle to that happening. That's a heck of an incentive to hate that competing ship. I get it.

That...might be a somewhat unique situation. There's a fight now because there's a challenger who might actually stand a chance.

This goes along with what we saw in the immediate aftermath of 7x04. I read someone else say (apologies, I don't know who it was, feel free to @ me if it was you and I'll credit you) that the early post-7x04 enthusiasm and acceptance of Tommy reflected the belief that he was temporary. A lot of folks thought it was just a way for Buck to get with Eddie, like, very soon after that. But the more time went by, the clearer it became that this was not the plan or the intention. So the mood soured for those who were still pulling for Buddie.

Other fandoms I've been in with a hugely dominant ship...Sherlock and X-Files are the two that spring immediately to mind...there was never a challenger with any legs. X-Files fandom wank was between the ship and the...lack of ship, shall we say. But a concrete, tangible "opponent" makes a fight so much more visceral, doesn't it?

I do think there's been a fandom shift towards needing ships to be canon that I don't really get, but it's there. There's been a lot written about fandom culture in the last ten years, the breakdown of boundaries between fans and creators, the access to those creators, a sense of ownership/entitlement, purity culture, obsession with shipping "correctly" (which leads into wanting things to be canon for the validation)...these are all newish features. So pile that on top of 9-1-1 having a longtime single ship that's legitimately threatened for the first time in its existence by a competing canon ship and it's kind of a powderkeg.

No wonder it's caught on fire.

[lutewife]

Ok so request thing it can be headcannons or one shot I don't really mind and feel free to ignore this up to you!

Husk x reader where the reader works at the bar with him

gn!reader, bartender!reader, fluff, mutual pining, talkative!reader, old people in love

Warnings: Mentions of alcohol and being drunk, obviously. Otherwise pure fluff.

Notes: Of course I can do it, anon! You're so polite, thank you for your consideration 🫶 I didn't know if you wanted it romantic or platonic, so I did romantic, since I love romance and unfortunately couldn't manage to do a Valentines special :( I added a few things, like reader characterisation, cause the request was kinda short and brief, I hope it's not a problem! And since you were nice I did both headcanons and a one-shot!

You and Husk worked together at the bar for a long time.

Or should I say, you were forced to, since you both made a deal with Alastor.

Including you, Husk and Niffty in his shenanigans was a norm, cause it's not like you could say no. What's worse was he took a bit of a liking for the three of you (maybe because of sheer amusement).

At some point, you just accepted your fate and rolled with it, trying to have fun while doing so.

Unlike Husk. He was a born pessimist and being happy was not something he was especially good at. Though with you, he seemed a bit more playful and sarcastic.

Mimzy often made fun of you two, because of your very different attitudes, but also similarities, like your love for alcohol (or rather drinking away your sorrows).

Every single resident of Hazbin Hotel (Alastor's new "investment") thought you were basically made for eachother, since you were perfectly making up for each others flaws.

Husk was more of a listener and you were more of a talker. When there weren't any customers to serve, he just listened to your yapping for hours, never getting bored.

When there was a customer though, they were certainly going to have fun talking to you. It was never boring when you were around. Husk's quiet presence was needed too, especially when someone just needed to vent.

What made you different from yourself as banterders, was your way of preparing drinks.

He focused more on the taste and if the liquor was strong or light enough for the person he was serving it for and you focused more on the presentation and the way of making the drink. You always had some tricks up your sleeve and amazed everyone.

If you fucked up with your little show, though, Husk always cleaned up after you, without saying a word.

After a long day, he often poured you two a drink. You sat on the other side of the counter in silence, enjoying each others presence. You didn't even need to tell him what you wanted. At this point, he just knew.

Husk also knew that he could trust you, mutually. Not only with making a nice drink, but also in everything else.

He and you knew one another's weaknesses, secrets and past, but there was a silent understanding between you, that when something like that was said, it was never mentioned again.

Past was in the past, the present is happening now. It was something you both agreed on.

Although what you haven't admitted to eachother, was that for decades you have been hiding a massive crush on one another.

Someone once said that opposites attract. Well, it was certainly the case for you two.

At first almost everyone thought you were dating. Your feelings are so obvious.

But not for you two...

It was the time of closing again.

You were spread out on the counter and tired as fuck. Your constant tricks and talkative behaviour were sometimes exhausting you a little too much. Husk knew it, that's why he didn't really feel the need to ask. He just quietly accepted your difference and tried to cheer you up, in his own way.

As a muffled groan of tiredness escaped your lips, you suddenly felt something cold against your forehead. Groggily opening your eyes, a sight of Husk holding two glasses of pure vodka was seen.

- Good work today, kid - he just said plainly, holding out one of them to you.

You didn't know why, but the bartender really liked to call you "kid", although you weren't that much younger than him. Well, you didn't exactly mind, since it made you feel young again. You just rolled your eyes at his weirdness, smiling a little and gladly took the drink.

- Thanks, old man. What would I do without you? - you played along and Husk smirked at the hint of sarcasm in your voice.

Then he looked down at the counter with a thoughtful look. You raised your eyebrow at that.

- You're thinking of something dumb again, aren't you?

The bartender just shrugged, not seeming to care about your opinion and proceeded to lift himself up on it.

- Oh, for fucks sake, I knew it - you shook your head, pretending to be irritated and moved away to give him space.

With a grunt, he managed to sit down on it. You fought the urge to clap for his achievement. But just as he took a sip of his vodka and was about to jump down, a loud groan escaped his lips.

"Oho. It's starting." You just thought to yourself, snorting.

The, as you stated correctly before, old man laid down on the counter, still holding the vodka, seemingly in pain.

A loud "UGH!" escaped his lips and you tried to hold back your laughter.

After some time of trying not to choke on your drink, you finally asked:

- You done?

- Yeah, I'm feeling perfectly fine, thank you for fucking asking - he just stated with his usual low voice, looking at you and pretending to be hurt by your lack of worry.

Typical Husk. Always trying a little too much to cheer you up, even at his expense. It was the usual.

But the thing is, he wouldn't act like that for just anyone. You knew. Yet, you still doubted.

Was it from your natural closeness? You've worked with him for years, always having a good relationship.

You were... Friends.

He had other friends too, but he wouldn't act that... Soft and playful with them. This... Touchy.

So the question is: did he want more?

Did you want more?

You shoke off the thoughts, realising you definitely got lost in them for much longer than expected. Your lips were hurting from nibbling on the glass too much.

Husk, who was still laying on the counter, although a little closer to you at this point, seemed worried about your behaviour.

- Huh. That bad? - he asked rhetorically, partially to you and to himself.

- No, it's... I've been just thinking... - you looked away, giving him a vague answer, so not fitting for you.

Usually, you would just help him get up, still smiling and in a better mood. Both your hand and his paw in direct contact, you would feel his soft fur... Sometimes he pulled you down with him on purpose, summing it up with an unapologetic "Whoops".

Maybe you just didn't experience physical touch for too long, but it made you feel...

Just like a teenager again.

Like you were still a human child, experiencing their first crush. The butterflies in your stomach, your soft, flustered smile; it hasn't changed. Maybe you lived your life once and fucked up. But these little moments after working your ass off and then being cheered up by someone you were truly content with, it was priceless.

It is pretty corny, isn't it?

Demon feeling like they still have a heart of a human or maybe some parts of it.

Well, it was certainly strange, but it felt good.

That good, in fact, that you needed to express it.

Without a second thought you leaned down, looking Husk in the eyes. He raised his brow, the worried expression dissapearing. Maybe you would just smile and play it off like a joke, like you always did?

But you didn't.

You didn't even talk. Your actions spoke.

- What're you... - Husk felt conflicted and suspicious of your silence, but he couldn't finish his thought.

Your hand was drawn to the bartender's cheek and your lips pecked his forehead. It was quick and almost felt like nothing. There was a small chance he wouldn't even notice it.

But he did.

When it came to you, he felt everything. Even the lightest touch, the softest smile.

But just as he was about to say something, you stood up, stretching, as if nothing had happened.

- Oh my. Look at the time. We sure did outdid ourselves. Hell of an alcohol break - you snorted at your little joke and just as you were to flee, as you always did, a hand grabbed you from behind.

It was Husk, standing. Huh. So he could get up by himself afterall.

- You must be shitting me. The night is still young, kid. - his unreadable expression quickly curled up into a smile - Care for another drink?

End notes: Hope you enjoyed this lil' thingy, anon! And I hope I did it right, since I haven't been writing Husk much. Old people in love is my favourite type of romance ever, so I needed to include it somehow hahaha If you wanted something else, please request again when the requests open, I will gladly oblige! Until next time. Stay tuned!

[anangelwhodidntfall]

I need hc's of Tsu'tey and human!reader like how they met, how they became friends and etc, I think it would be cute <3

A/N: Tsu'tey and Human!reader is my new favorite thing to write, because they are both so in love with each other &lt;3

Tsu’tey & His Favorite Human Headcannons

How They Met: 

-She had been out in the forest exploring for a few days with Norm and Dr. Augustine when Tsu'tey first laid eyes on her. 

-He had been out hunting when he heard their voices and decided to watch them from the sidelines trying to see what they were up to before taking off since they weren't harming anything or anyone 

-It would be a few days later when he heard a yelp making him alert and run towards the source where he saw her laying face first on the ground.

-He helped her and asked if she was okay, checking over for injuries but now up close he could see how beautiful she was even if she was a Sky Demon. 

-She thanked him for helping her and when she got back to the lab, and told everyone what happened they were all in shock as they all knew Tsu'tey wasn't fond of humans.

-that night she lay in her room thinking about the handsome warrior that had helped her today and hoped she would run into him again

-Tsu'tey lay in his hammock thinking about the pretty sky demon he had seen and hoped he might run into her again.

After Her and Jake Get Invited to Camp:

-Despite her not having an avatar she was still invited to learn the way of the people along with Jake which made her smile

-Tsu'tey didn't know what to think when he got assigned to teach you the way of the people, i mean how was he supposed to teach you when you were a human

-he remembers the night of asking why she didn't have an avatar and the sadness that spread across her face. "I got hurt in my avatar, and now I can't use it until they fix it so I'm stuck like this" she said as Tsu'tey frowned at her words.

-Even though she was human she did try to keep up with them and learn their ways even if it took her longer than normal.

-Tsu'tey was impressed by her and how well she was able to complete some of the tasks and how she didn't give up if she couldn't complete one.

-the more time they spent together, the more they learned about one another. He learned about her favorite things, her life before Earth, and her time having an avatar. She got to know him and his favorite things, his family history, and he even told her about his first love.

Them Officially Being Friends and Possibly Something More:

-So Mo'at asked reader to start healing training since she saw how reader was with helping out members of the clan who were hurt

-Tsu'tey always accompanies her when she has to go into the forest, bringing her back herbs, and allowing her to practice her skills on him

-whenever Tsu'tey gets hurt, he immediately goes to her even if it's a small scratch just to see her worry her little heart over him being hurt

-them going for rides on ikran, he loves seeing how happy reader gets whenever they ride, or when she gets to feed his ikran

-he makes her traditional clothing so she can "fit in" but really he thinks she looks so pretty in them

-sometimes they will lay out in their secret spot together and talk about everything and anything until fall asleep in each other's arms.

-one time the reader got attacked by some of the Navi that didn't accept humans and Tsu'tey was fuming and nearly killed them

-He loves to carry reader in his arms, and his heart nearly melts every time she falls asleep against him 

-Reader loves to be picked up and carried by him so much, that they could be talking with Jake and Neytiri that she will look at Tsu'tey and be like "carry me and he picks her up and they wave by to Jake and Neytiri who left confused. 

-Him making a bow more suited for reader since she's so little

-Him hurting anyone who lays a hand on her unintentionally or intentionally for example, reader had been watching the warriors hunt with Tsu'tey when the Na'vi next to her accidentally forgot she was there and went to move the hand with his bow in and ended wacking her and breaking her nose. 

-Him putting some of his beads in her hair as an unofficial way of marking her as his but then they kissed and all his plans were ruined. 

-After some internal debate and seeking advice from his friends and Mo'at he decided to finally make reader his officially and he was so happy when she said yes :)

(Courting & Becoming Mates)

-once he started the courting process, he rebuilt his home to make it more livable for her which meant a space for oxygen tanks for her masks and whatnot

-he also built shelves for her herbs and medicine and her other stuff such as her crystals or photos, yeah he studied her room a lot 

-he made a staircase with the help of his friends so she could get up and down to his house with ease

-He also had some of her blankets brought from the lab to his home as well, essentially he brought anything from her room to his home to make it more of her space too. 

-When he finally showed it to her, she was in awe and so much more in love with him after seeing what he did for her with the staircase to inside the home, he truly did care about her 

-His pride and heart soared when she told him that she loved everything about it and him so much followed by a hug.

-Since the reader is human and doesn't have a na'vi right now, she can't properly mate with Tsu'tey by making the Tsaheylu, which worried her alot until he took her to the Spirit Tree and mated with her before Ewya, like he would've done if she was Na'vi. 

-After the mating happened, they could hardly keep their hands off of each other

-Anytime reader feels insecure about being human, he always reminds her how perfect she is, because in his eyes she truly is

-them constantly being with each other, never far apart from one another unless he has to go hunt or train the new warriors and then in that case she is stuck with Neytiri until he gets back

-the two of them constantly doing each other's hair and complimenting each other and making each other sick with how in love they are

-When reader finds out she has to get a new avatar, she was upset until Tsu'tey reminded her that it was him and her forever and that he would still love her as he does now if she never got one which made feel grateful for having him in her life

-her never being able to sleep without him beside her or if they are fighting which is hardly

-her introducing him to human technology such as a camera which he ended up actually liking it especially when he was taking pictures of reader

-when she finally got her avatar he was so happy, probably happier than her, they could do so much more now that she had her avatar

-when she finally gets pregnant, he cries because he didn't think it would be possible 

-him doting on her during her pregnancy and being the best father to their son 

-they ended up having 4 four kids together, three sons and a girl who was a total daddy's girl.

-in the end, the reader and tsu'tey got their happy ending with the person they love most in the world.

[ben-marco]

It disturbs me to no end that it is easier for teenagers to end up in Discord servers full of people who will convince them that they were abused by shadowy international groups than it is for these same teenagers to get actual professional help for the trauma they actually do have.

It's upsetting that there's a trend of teenagers who are more willing to accept that they were internationally trafficked for their entire childhoods than they are to accept that maybe their parents weren't perfect, or that they were physically/emotionally/sexually abused in a non-organized context, or that they do not have trauma histories to begin with.

It's disheartening that young people seem to think that OEA is the only "valid" form of abuse, that DID is the only "valid" mental illness, and that they have to exaggerate what actually happened to them and the conditions they actually have.

You do not have to have gone through OEA to be traumatized. You do not have to have DID to be mentally ill and in need of support. OEA is not the only thing that can traumatize a person. DID is not the only mental illness that deserves recognition and help (on that note, can we stop treating depression and anxiety as if they are "lesser" mental illnesses?).

Furthermore, it's OKAY to realize and accept that you do not have DID or trauma. Being dissociative and having trauma is not the norm. It should not be easier to believe that you have a history of extreme and organized abuse than it is to assume that your childhood was normal.

And as someone who did go through OEA, I can tell you that it is difficult to come to terms with what happened to me. I spend a lot of time wondering what my life could've been like otherwise, and wishing that I did not have a trauma history. So I hope you'll understand when I say it's bizarre to see minors blindly accepting that they went through OEA when they did not.

[neonswitchhouse]

Pop Culture Witchcraft and the Importance of Being Cringe

Cringe has become a bit a loaded word nowadays, being at first a word to describe feelings of second-hand embarrassment, arguably from failings to impress others or to raise one's social capital. Think for example failed motorsports stunts, falling into pools with a tray full of fruity drinks or even worse; someone trying to impress a crush by molding themselves into someone they only think the other party would like via baseless assumptions. Your body recoils, seeing a dirt biker tumble down the course. Your stomach sinks, watching someone plunge into the shallow end of the water. You squirm watching someone try to convince their crush to go out with the facade they made. That I would describe as "empathetic cringe"; a reaction based on witnessing something you do not wish upon yourself like physical harm or embarrassment.

The modern definition of cringe however, is a different beast entirely.

Using the Urban Dictionary meaning as defined by user Screech McGee, "Before the internet trolls changed the meaning of this word, "cringe" was a verb used to express embarrassment or disgust. Now, this word is mostly used to define something that you dislike or do not understand. Internet trolls use this word as an insult towards people in fandoms, with bad grammar, or both combined. Trolls also use this word to describe memes on some occasions."

Doing a quick search on YouTube or Tiktok for "cringe" gives you an array of oddities to the average eye; people dressed in rainbow-colored wolf fursuits, teens expressing their love and attachment for their favorite anime character, or perhaps someone outwardly displaying behaviors considered aneurotypical. They fall outside societal norms and standards of behavior. They aren't perceived as "normal or acceptable" to the standards set by white-cis-het-able bodied-neurotypical persons and communities.

But in it, the furries, the fandom-lovers, and even the "neurospicys" are harming none. They're doing what they want.

Sounds kinda familiar doesn't it?

Lets loop around to what you're probably reading this rant for; the witchy reasons.

Witchcraft as a practice, is already an outsider to most societies, especially to those predominated shaped by Protestant Christian beliefs. It's already something outside the norms. Even back during the hey-day of reality tv shows like Wife Swap, those who weren't considered Christian or followed more "earth-based" religions and lifestyles were presented as the butt of the joke. And while witchcraft and non-Christian beliefs as a whole have becoming more popular nowadays, it's still considered something outside the norm or in the minority of persons identifying themselves as witches and pagans voluntarily.

So we're already ticking one "cringe" box according to societal norms

Chaos Magic as a whole is based on using belief as a tool or as a fuel source to workings to enact change or bring it about to oneself or to the environment around them as a whole. Hence the whole "nothing is true, everything is permitted" thing in that there's no one strict set of rules to make something work.

Pop Culture Witchcraft and Pop Culture Paganism deriving from chaos magic, while with several theories as to how it works, the crux is in "belief", in energy fueled into something or even someone.

Going off the egregoric model, egregores are formed and fed by the energy (ie: belief) fueled into them. This is where fandom comes into play. Fandom is fueled by passion, by love, by admiration, by forming community around shared likes, interests, or even dislikes. Fandoms are funnels for that collective energy, passion, creativity, etc.

And to some, pouring in so much joy, passion, fervor, and creativity can be seen as something out of their grasp of understanding; something that they're the outsider to and not the main target audience of. It's "not made for them". Therefore it's deemed as "cringe" underneath that definition.

But why deprive oneself of joy just for the approval of others?

Why force oneself to conform to arbitrary rules and norms?

As long as your joys and passions affect only yourself and do not harm others directly, why shield it from view?

To get the most out of a pop culture practice, it's good to have it based on what you're passionate about; what you're well-versed in. What gives you that fuel or belief. What brings you joy and makes you want to pursue things even further.

So be cringe, be passionate, be able to go on a dang unprompted 20minute rant about the lore to your favorite failed RPG series. Be able to show a whole dang portfolio of your self-insert smooching your favorite character on the cheek. Be absolutely, unapologetically passionate about something and see what happens. See what happens when you drop the worries of how others perceive you.

So stay safe, have fun, be cringe, be free, stay spooky.

[steventhusiast]

Take your pick:

+ Heist AU

+ Fantasy AU

+ Soulmates AU

Look, I really like AUs.

Thank you if you do one!! ❤️❤️

hi! i'll dooooo soulmates au :D take this rambly lil mess. also sorry this took so long, i forgot about the prompts in my inbox oops

-

The scariest thing about finding your soulmate is the possibility of being wrong. Or, it's been the scariest thing for Eddie, anyway.

For some people, it's easy; Gareth's soulmark is on his forearm, so it's visible all the time, and it's also so unique and specific- Eddie's certainly never seen anyone else with something as specific as a lobster holding a scythe for a soulmark. Maybe Gareth's soulmate is super into fishing and also is a goth? Or a farmer? He hasn't met them yet, but when he does! He'll at least know for sure that they're his soulmate.

But for Eddie? He has a simple cartoon-ish sunshine on his upper abdomen within a larger circle. So he's always wondered, how will he know? For certain, he means. Surely anyone can be associated with sunshine.

Then he meets Steve. Sunshine personified.

And he spends the first few months of knowing him uncertain. They have chemistry, sure, and Steve is... bright. Like, lights up a room as soon as he enters, perfect smile, eyes sparkling no matter how he's feeling, can cheer anyone up with a little shoulder nudge and a soft 'you okay?' kind of bright.

Eddie just can't be wrong about this. Because his parents were wrong, and look where they ended up. Unhappy, unloved, and dead. (Maybe not directly, but still). They weren't right for each other and they realised too late that the angel wings on his dad's shoulder weren't for his mom, and the devil horns on his mom's shoulder weren't for his dad. But by then Eddie had already been born, so they stayed together, and everyone suffered for it.

He can't go through that. Not again. Not first-hand.

Even when he and Steve first start dating, Eddie finds himself holding back. It's like his heart is inside a safe with a padlock keeping it shut, and that safe is in a locked cage, and that locked cage is hidden at the back of his ribcage.

Obviously, because Steve is so lovely and the embodiment of light, he manages to find it. He gets past each layer of Eddie's defences until his heart is there on a platter for him, vulnerable and beating oh-so-fast.

But it's slow going.

When Steve reveals the soulmark on his upper abdomen, a simple crescent moon with a slightly larger icosagon behind it, it chips away at Eddie's defences a little. But only a little, because his parents thought their marks matched too.

When Eddie can't stop smiling around Steve, and finds himself gushing about him to his friends, they're chipped away at a little more. Little moments like that do most of the work.

But the final, final thing that unlocks that safe protecting his heart, is accepting that uncertainty. Maybe Eddie will never truly find out.

They're not his parents, though. They talk to each other when things are wrong, and neither of them leave unannounced for days at a time, and neither of them are addicted to hard drugs, and they're actually happy with each other. Like, truly happy in a way Wayne promises Eddie's parents never were.

Maybe Steve's not the universe-approved sunshine to Eddie's moonlight. But he's okay with that.

He'll love him anyway. Because when has Eddie Munson ever been about conforming to societal norms?

-

Got a prompt? Send it to me

[dnphobe]

Looking at how they've presented themselves over time is always interesting. I think the queer experience of slowly questioning societal and gender norms (and gender, in many cases) is something I recognize in them. Im also curious how Phil's journey is different because he was out to his close ones for a lot longer, and it feels like Dan has more fun shouting about being gay because of the trauma that he associated with the label. I loved seeing their support of queer identities even when they were publicly closeted. It's nice that, even if they weren't comfortable being out, they wanted everyone to know they were a safe space

i agree! the different ways they've presented themselves to us over the years is one of my favourite topics to talk about tbh!

dan's journey wrt to gender presentation and how he feels about gender (not gonna theorise on how he identifies bc what do i know, but to quote him he's fine with being viewed as a man but also not offended if people use pronouns/gendered terms outside of that to refer to him) is interesting because he's said he's always been "flamboyant" but tried to hide that in his youtube career for a long time, and he's gone from saying "i can't do it i'm just such a boy" about painting his nails to having them painted more often than not, but also in day in the life of manchester he said he sometimes wishes he was a girl when looking at 'women's clothing', so it's clearly something he's felt for a long time.

i don't think phil necessarily feels the same pull to be gender non-conforming, but it is also something he's struggled with doing (in one of the stereo shows, when talking about the maid dress he wore in VPMO 2, he said that while it was a cheap joke outfit, a few years ago he would not have felt comfortable wearing a dress at all) so that might be something he's still working toward being comfortable with, but at the same time he's never felt shame about telling us things like he likes using raspberry scented body wash or that he does skin care (while when phil mentioned doing skin care dan was clutched by toxic masculinity saying "don't do- i mean that's fine!"

agree with dan having more fun shouting about being gay because of the trauma and i'm so glad he's reached where he is now! phil...i think for a long time he thought he didn't NEED to shout about being gay, especially because like you said he was out to a few people for longer. but i think it's something he realised he DID want to do after coming out to us. as he said in his coming out one year later video he didn't realise how much of himself he was holding back from us by not being out and it feels like a weight off his shoulders now. i think they both love being gay and shouting about being gay and celebrating that with us and im so proud of phil too <3 i actually have a hot take which is i think if it wasn't for dan's coming out he might have never fully come out to us, not just in a "if dan never had he never would have" way, but in a "if he and dan never met he wouldn't have" way, because he IS a private person and didn't think he was missing out on anything.

i am always so glad they made sure we knew they were accepting of us even if they weren't ready to be out. ngl it got kind of rough in like 2012 for me when dan was so adamantly against people thinking he was gay my own internalised homophobia brain went "does he hate gay people?" but that's on me, not him, or more accurately on BOTH of our internalised homophobia situations lmao. but yeah they've always been so sweet about their queer and trans fans, and one thing i personally appreciate so much is how they will use they/them for any fan they don't know the gender of no matter what their name/appearance/voice would make other people assume their gender to be! i feel so safe with them, and im gonna add this bc im still sappy after this weekend, so safe with phannies too <3 i think phannies queer identities and dnp's queer identities have ALWAYS flowed into each other and both sides of the parasocial line have made the other side feel safe and grow into their identities and helped them accept and appreciate other people's identities.

[medusas-daughter]

https://www.tumblr.com/medusas-daughter/756745829152374784/i-had-to-block-so-many-alicent-stans-bulldozing-my?source=share

"to raise her sons to believe they are better than women simply because they're men."

They live in a patriarchal society, are you seriously going to blame her for being a woman of her time and raising her sons in accordance with the norms of that time? Because yes, in the Middle Ages, a woman is better than a man. Deal with it.

I don't usually answer these and just choose my peace but you caught me in a feisty mood so here we go.

First of all, this isn't the Middle Ages, this is Westeros, it's fictional, it's not real, whatever inspiration GRRM took from real history, Westeros is not real.

Second of all, pleanty of women had actual power in Westeros. Aegon didn't conquer shit on his own, Visenya and Rhaenys were right there and did most of the leg work. Dorne didn't have male primogeniture. The eldest became prince or princess of Dorne. Yes granter not in Westeros, not at the time, but it wasn't such a foreign concept to Westeros people. Half of the seven gods they believe in are in female form. Women weren't second class citizens not allowed to speak or think or act, Westeros isn't inspired by Taliban rule.

Viserys chose his eldest daughter as his heir, all of the Westeros Lords swore their fealty to her, and even after her brothers were born and Viserys had died, half of the Westeros Lords were still loyal to Rhaenyra and to that oath they once swore to her, Lady Arryn fought and won for her right to be the head of the Vale. All of these things happened during those "Middle Ages" you speak of, happened right in front of Alicent's eyes. She had a choice between accepting Rhaenyra as heir during a time where women were publically getting mroe official power or following her father's scheme and usurping her. She could have raised her sons to respect their sister and they would have received high places in court, like most princes and princesses and siblings of royals in medieval and modern times. But she chose to follow her father's ambitions and raise her sons to both despise women and fear their sister. Aegon, canonically, in both book and show, did not want to usurp Rhaenyra; don't get me wrong once he got a taste for power he didn't want to let it go, and once he lost his kids there was no going back; but he did not want it initially. He states in the show that he will not challenge Rhaenyra, and in the book he says "what kind of brother steals his sister's birthright", during those "Middle Ages", he acknowledged that his sister is the rightful heir. But Alicent has to convince him to usurp his sister, and she does that first by instilling paranoia and fear in him that if he doesn't become king Rhaenyra won't allow him to live (as if historically first borns were known to kill their younger siblings to keep their crowns...) and second by raising him and his brothers to intimatelye believe that a man is better/smarter/more capable of ruling than a woman and that a woman in power would ruin the country, just like Otto repeats multiple times.

Just because something has been the norm doesn't make it okay and it doesn't mean it's not possible to change it . If some people are capable of change, others are too. And I will absolutely blame anyone who stands in the way of positive change, whether in fiction or reality. Alicent wasn't the only once who stood in the way of rhaenyra getting her birthright, obviously, but she wasn't innocent in it and I will not spare her of any responsibility or view her as a poor innocent maiden with no agency just because she's a woman.

I don't even hate Alicent as a character, I do blame her for what she did and I pity her for what was done to her and I've acknowledged multiple times that she's a very realistic complex far right women for trump type of character (and if you don't like me saying that, go fight Olivia Cook who has literally described her character the same way this is a very lukewarm take considering the material). But yall green stans are making me hate her out of pure spite.

Istg green stans have got to be the most annoying group of people I have ever had to deal with in this fandom. Do you see me running around green blogs and forcing my opinions down their throat? Go read a fanfic, go rewatch the show, go enjoy your show/media/material the way you want to and leave me the fuck alone. I've blocked so many but they keep coming back. tf

[exeggcute]

the internet and Tumblr in general was already full of shut ins with anxiety and COVID has obviously transformed many of them into hypochondriac agoraphobes who are well trained on moralizing lol. there are people who still think we should never have ended lockdown and that it somehow had no negative social or economic impacts, or at least that the economy is fake enough that those impacts weren't really real

lol yeah. answering this in daylight hours I feel like I should preface it with a note about how I've been masking consistently for four years straight (and have only recently started easing up in certain situations), have lost respect for and/or ended friendships with people who were doing reckless shit during the height of the pandemic, all that. god knows I have an anxious hypochondriac shut-in streak lol. but if the bitch with contamination OCD who's been doing the "disinfect your phone when you get home" thing for years and years before covid and who has literal nightmares about people wearing shoes in my house is like hey guys I think you might be exaggerating some of this just a bit. well. imagine how literally anyone else is gonna feel...

also for reference the thing that got me on this soapbox was an article I saw shared on bluesky about how san francisco is currently experiencing "the highest covid wastewater rates ever measured," which immediately sounded off to me, so I read the damn article, and what it actually seemed to be saying was that there's a summer spike in CA right now same as there's been for the last several summers, and SF currently has a higher rate than any other region in CA at the moment. (the article was legit poorly written to the point where it was hard to tell, but a different wastewater graph someone pulled up seemed to corroborate my reading of this. the current spike is still a fraction of pre-vaccine spikes.)

which, like, is useful information even without the embellishment! I would appreciate knowing that so I could adjust my behavior accordingly. and I'd like to believe that your average person who's receptive to stuff would also take the truth in good stride. so why do we have to fucking lie about it lol.

and to some extent I really do get the impulse to catastrophize because there's no way around it: we super duper fucked up the initial covid response. many individuals were callous and most institutions failed to protect us. but at the same time (1) barn door situation and (2) I don't think exaggerating risks now does anything to compensate for the downplayed risks being peddled to us for the last several years. it's more than fair to celebrate wins when they come (all the new tools in our anti-covid toolbelt, improved case/death rates) without erasing the many many losses up to this point.

still gonna wear a mask on airplanes and shit for the rest of my life though. I'm glad that's an iota more socially acceptable now (and jealous of places where it's already been the norm this whole time) because people are fucking nasty!!!

[hedghost]

less being nervous abt transfer season and all the rumours going around and when it all gets a little too much r plans a night in for them w all her fav things 🥹

alessia russo / ease her mind

to begin with, neither you nor alessia had thought much about the impending end of her contract. sure, the drama of the january transfer season had offered a fleeting, but very real, reminder; the arsenal offer had been a bullet in the dark, blindly dodged before you even had time to register the gunshot, but once that was shut down, the two of you settled back into the routine of the season, and the summer faded to only a niggling thought in the back of your mind.

you'd both spoken about the various possibilities of course, with you due to stay in manchester for at least a season or two, but you had faith in your relationship to withstand whatever may occur. although you would've appreciated some clarity on the future, you could tell that alessia was equally in the dark - though she seemed to be having a tougher time dealing with it. you knew she was a creature of habit, knew that uncertainty frightened her, and you could tell that talking about it too much, when it was so firmly out of either of your hands, was only doing your girlfriend far more harm than good.

and so you did your best to ease her worries, trying to project your whatever will be, will be attitude onto her, and, given that she was so adept at trusting you, it worked - at least for a few months.

as the season wore on however, and the deadline loomed ever closer, you could tell by alessia's change in demeanour that it was starting to weigh heavier on her mind. her carefree positivity wavered a little more each day, she laughed a little less, and a little quieter, pushed herself a little harder; head down, body tense. she played each game as though it might be her last, relished each minute she got on the pitch with a little more ferocity. each goal she didn't score seemed to sting a little more, each interaction with a fan tugged a little harder at her heartstrings.

for anyone else, the change in attitude may have been attributed to the backend end of the season, the laser-focus of a professional getting down to business, but to you, alessia was see-through; an open book. despite this, there seemed to be nothing you could do to ease her mind. she wouldn't talk about her contract, wouldn't hear any conversation of transfer season, seemingly wishing to just deny it was even on the horizon at all.

an open book in a foreign language. a glass vault, firmly locked.

and so you let it lie. that was an issue for after the season, and for now you were content to help alessia enjoy her potential last days at united, and to allow yourself to enjoy the luxury of having her nearby.

the season drew to a close, and the team was in high spirits. the fa cup loss had been hard to take, sure, and you knew exactly why alessia had taken it harder than most, but with the team finishing in second in the league after a long run of great performances, everyone was happily looking ahead to the summer.

though you were hoping for a bit of a rest, the end of the season meant you both finally had a chance to celebrate and have fun, and you weren't about to miss out. you both were bombarded with invites from various people - parties, trips away, breakfasts, brunches, coffee, lunches, dinner, nights out, the lot. while a hectic schedule was your norm, it was a nice change for the plans to be social ones, rather than training or work commitments, and so you and alessia accepted them readily.

still, it was a lot. neither of you had really had a break, a chance to fully relax, and you found yourself wondering how long alessia could last before it all boiled over.

with the season over, transfer rumours had begun to fly in full force, with the brunt of them concerning alessia. you knew it was stressing her out, having come no closer to a deal with either arsenal or united, or any other of the numerous interested clubs. it didn't help that no matter where you went, no matter who she was speaking to, alessia was being bombarded with questions.

journalists were the worst offenders, circling her like vultures, but even when you were with friends it always came up. although it was often in the form of light-hearted jokes or teasing banter, you could see the toll it was taking on alessia. you spent enough time looking at her to not miss her downcast eyes or tensed shoulders.

it all came to a head one evening, when the two of you joined a few of the united girls for a night out at a bar in manchester. you were squeezed into a booth between vilde and lessi, fourth drink in hand, laughing as you all clamoured to be heard over the thumping music and shouts of other inebriated patrons.

you kept an eye on lessi, having not missed her tired eyes and quiet responses to you earlier in the day. you chucked her a few sideways glances, keeping your hand firmly planted on her thigh, but you were pleased to see that she seemed to have brightened up a little. that is, until millie, considerably drunk, brought up the topic of next year, swaying as she rose from her seat to perform an exuberant toast.

we're gonna win the league next year bitches!

you laughed as maya pulled her back down forcefully to save her from embarrassment, the rest of the girls all cheering at millie's wild claim. all except alessia. you squeezed her thigh, watching as her mouth tightened and she developed a sudden interest in the bottom of her glass. this time though, you weren't the only one to notice her reaction.

except for lessi, the traitor!

the rest of the girls laughed again at millie's addition, but you winced at how perfectly she'd found lessi's sore spot. you went to say something, to signal subtly across the table for millie to leave her be, but before you could, alessia rose from her seat. she mumbled something about getting another drink, before she sped away, eyes downcast and shoulders hanging low.

the girl's laughter faded immediately, and millie looked at you with frantic apology.

shit, i'm sorry- i didn't mean-

you sighed, running a hand through your hair with a sad smile. millie wasn't exactly to blame, you knew she'd been joking, and you were sure alessia did too. this was just the last straw in a series of similar encounters, each one chipping away at alessia's facade a little more. you were quick to placate millie.

no it's okay, she's just stressed about it all, sore spot and all that- i'm just gonna go check up on her

you barely registered the girl's nods before you were up out of your seat, in hot pursuit of your girlfriend. despite her earlier excuse, she wasn't at the bar, nor was she in the bathroom. you pulled out your phone to call her, but were stopped by a familiar head of blonde hair sat alone in the smoking area.

you slid wordlessly onto the bench beside her, choosing to sling an arm loosely around her shoulders. alessia started a bit at the contact, before she let herself be tugged gently into you. she kept her eyes down as she curled into you, pressing her face into your chest. you heard her sniffle slightly, before you felt the wetness of her cheeks against your exposed collarbone. your hand found the back of her head, and you held her tight into you.

i just don't know what to do

she whimpered into your neck. she sounded so weak, so tired of it all. the pit in your stomach grew, and your heart twisted. you hated to see your girl like this. you swayed the two of you a little, kissing her hairline and murmuring into her hair.

i know darling, i know

you didn't have much else you could say. there were no perfect words you could utter to fix all this, no way to magically put her world to rights. god knows you would've done it by now if there was.

can we go home?

you nodded, pulling alessia to stand. you wiped her tears and pecked her cheek, as she tried to muster any sort of smile. it lasted all of two seconds before her face fell again, and she practically shuddered with exhaustion. leaving alessia briefly outside, you said a quick goodbye to the girls as you left, who listened with concern as you explained the situation. they ushered you out with messages of love for you to pass on, content with the fact that their girl was in safe hands with you.

the ride home was quiet, though your hand never left alessia's. you traced circles into her soft palms, trying to soothe just a little bit of her anxieties. you knew you'd need to talk about it at some point, but that could wait. alessia definitely wasn't in a talking mood, and all you wanted to do was offer comfort. when you got in, you sent her to bed immediately, promising to join her in a few seconds. you fetched her a water and some painkillers - already anticipating tomorrow's hangover - before you sent a quick message to the girls to let them know less was home safe.

you let alessia sleep in the next day, taking a while to just hold her close to you as she did. she'd curled into your side the second you'd slipped under the covers, still sniffling slightly as she breathed you in, and she hadn't moved from her position all night. you'd lain awake long after she'd slipped into sleep, heart breaking for her as you softly stroked her arm.

you were careful not to wake her now, as you slipped out from her grasp. she stirred a little at the movement, but you stroked her hair until she curled back into herself. you left a note on her bedside table, next to the water and painkillers, before slipping out to the shops.

when you returned, you were pleased to find alessia was still asleep. clearly she was exhausted, both mentally and physically. she needed the rest. you knew she had a meeting with her agent in the afternoon, unfortunately regarding transfer business, but she could sleep until then.

you busied yourself with cooking lunch in the meantime, and soon enough alessia emerged, still looking half-asleep. you opened your arms to her, and she padded dutifully over. she sighed into your neck as you swayed her back and forth, the perfect picture of domestic bliss, before she pulled back to kiss you gently.

i'm sorry for last night, she murmured against your lips.

don't be, you replied, feeling any better?

the hum she gave you in reply was noncommittal, and you nodded sadly, already knowing her stresses wouldn't have been eased overnight. you may not have been able to take the burden of it all off her shoulders, but you had a plan to hopefully lighten the weight.

you led her to the table, plating up her food and delivering it with a kiss. she smiled in return, but it did little to ease the tiredness in her eyes. you were pleased to see her mood increase steadily as you ate, but the tension seemed to return in full force when she remembered the meeting with luca. alessia groaned and buried her face in her hands. you stroked her calf with your foot under the table.

i know, babe, i know - but when you're done we're having a chill night in, okay?

i thought you were meeting maya? she looked up at you, eyes questioning.

i've already told her i can't make it

but-

no buts less, i can see maya whenever i want - tonight is about you

alessia smiled, a slight blush rising beneath her spray of freckles. she nodded, before she got up to get ready.

as soon as she was out the door you got to work enacting your plan. two years of dating lessi meant you knew her inside out, and you'd meticulously planned the evening to include everything that might make her feel better right now. you began by cleaning the entire flat, knowing that alessia was a firm believer in tidy house, tidy mind, but also aware that when she was stressed, it was the first thing she neglected, leading to a pile up of laundry, and her shoes and belongings littering the hallways in an obstacle course of various trip hazards. then you set to work on dinner.

you'd chosen one of your classic 'marry me meals', as you called them, a repertoire of elaborate but comforting home-cooked dinners, all chosen especially with alessia in mind. you picked her favourite to make tonight, the one she requested most often, but that you saved for special occasions. the familiar motions of cooking allowed you to relax a little, taking your mind of your girlfriend's pain, which in all honesty was eating you alive. while before, you'd selfishly hoped she'd stay at united, now all you wanted was for it to be sorted so that alessia could relax. she could play football on mars for all you cared, as long as she was happy. if you had to invest in a spacesuit to watch her play, so be it.

when alessia texted you that she was on her way home, you quickly ran a bath, lighting candles and filling it with her favourite bath salts. you were adding a spoonful of honey to a cup of herbal tea - her favourite blend - when you heard the door open.

how was it, love? you called as alessia removed her shoes and dropped her bag. she shrugged as she moved towards you.

more of the same, i- wait, did you clean?

yes i did, now come on

you pulled her into the bathroom, her eyes widening as she took in what you'd set up for her. you began to peel off her clothes for her, taking her hand as she stepped into the bath. you handed her the tea, and she sighed, eyes swimming with emotion.

y/n i-

shh, less, just let me help you relax okay? no transfer rumours, no contract talks, just you and me

she nodded gratefully, and you began to wash her hair for her, kneading your hands gently through her tresses, massaging her head as you untangled her hair. you took your sweet time, smiling as alessia's shoulders loosened more than they had in a while.

feel good? you asked, and alessia nodded. she leant back to look at you, and your heart flipped at the sight of her.

i love you, y/n

love you more less

leaving her there to soak for a little longer, you went to put the finishing touches on dinner. you collected alessia's favourite blanket from the bedroom, laying out fresh pyjamas and one of your hoodies for her as you did.

when alessia emerged, it was to find you with your hands on your hips, lips pursed as you critically surveyed the set up you'd created. mood lighting, plenty of blankets, alessia's favourite films already lined up to watch on the tv, an array of all her favourite snacks and drinks, anything and everything you could think of.

sensing her presence, you spun around to take her hands, ignoring her offers to help with dinner as you pushed her onto the sofa. she laughed, blue eyes shining, as you made a show of tucking her in and kissing her hand, before you went to grab the food.

she nestled into your side as you both ate, kissing your cheeks in silent thanks, expression glowing with love. you watched her closely, scanning for any residual stress or tension, but you came up short. you felt a weight on your chest that you didn't even notice was there release, like a fist clenching your heart had let go.

when alessia finished eating, you pulled her so she was on top of you, smiling as she burrowed into your chest. you reached a hand beneath her shirt to scratch lightly against her back, and she hummed. alessia pressed a kiss to your neck, nipping at it playfully in gratitude.

thank you, y/n

anything for you less

[sunny-mercya]

Marriage Arrangements

Heiji Hattori x Male Reader

Fandom -> Detective Conan/Case Closed

Masterlist

Heiji had half a mind to say—when being asked who you are, after bringing you and Kazuha along to pick Conan and Ran up from the train station—that you're a nobody, nothing but a distant acquaintance, but Heiji didn't as he had promised himself not say anything remotely mean about or at you anymore—still gnawing on his regrets of what he said during middle school long ago.

So with his usual grin, Heiji placed his arm around your waist—should have telling you, before leaving the house, not to wear your heavy traditional Kimonos again—pulling you close to him.

»That's my fiancé! [Name]'s a bit shy tho.« Heiji's introduction of you was filled with boastful pride—glancing at you, when you in meek shyness uttered out a little „hello“ and bowing your head a bit down.

»Your what?! Fiancé?! Since when?!« they all shouted in unison—gaining a few curiosity looks from bypassing people—shock of surprise clearly written on their faces as neither of them knew of such information about their friend, quite a shocker per se to hear.

»Since forever. How 'bout we go and have some lunch? I know just the right–« Heiji stopped mid-sentence—turning his head to you, raising his eyebrows in a silent question—when you pulled at his arm to get his attention.

»I'll go back home, uhm I uhm have to do some chores and your mother asked me uhm for some assistance...« you had said in a kind of rush of mumbling, that Heiji almost didn't hear you—he did and nodded in response, giving you a small smile of reassurance.

With a small bow you bid your goodbye and rushed away—although with your long and heavy Kimono it looked more like a penguin waddling.

Heiji didn't—and neither did Kazuha—called you on your obvious lie, both knowing that there weren't any chores to attend for you, but they also know how shy and—to an certain degree—uncomfortable you could feel around new people.

And Heiji, which Kazuha applauded him for—because he finally shows more kindness and compassion towards you—didn't want to force you to stay any longer than necessary, especially not when it oversteps your personal boundaries of comfort.

~~~

Although Heiji's parents were rather modern and opened minded people when it comes to the changing times of today's tomorrow—had been very accepting of his sexuality and coming out—they still abide to the rules of traditional lifestyle, participating in such forms of living and social arrangements and their norms.

One thing of traditional lifestyle would be arranged marriages, which Heiji had the unpleasant blessing of being roped into such since birth.

When Heiji had (finally) the chance of meeting you, which was during his second year of middle school, he wasn't pleased at all and obviously making it clear that he didn't liked the arrangement—begrudgingly forcing any formality of necessity politeness out of his mouth—his parents already giving him stern looks—and voicing loudly his displeasure of the situation.

At first, Heiji remembers very well, you had tried your best to befriend him—greeting him with the brightest smile you could muster in the morning when seeing him—after all you two are bound to see one another, when living together in a separate wing of the Hattori house—making him Bento's every night—than besides being born as a boy, one of the few in a household of just females, your upbringing when it comes to duties and responsibilities were that of a woman—and showing nothing but kindness to him.

But the more Heiji had ignored your mere presence—sneering at you, whenever he saw you—your approaching of befriending had become less and less and when Heiji started with snide remarks and commentary—close to insulting—and telling everyone who asked, that you're a mere nothing and waste of space—you withdrew completely.

It had gotten so bad, around the last year of middle school, that you either had locked yourself up in your room—whenever Heiji had been home—or threw yourself into a workaholic of household chores—missing school on purpose even, just to avoid him—till you become so exhausted and sick that you collapsed and had to be taken to the hospital.

The guilt had started when Heiji—forced to come along with his mother, who had giving him a earful of lectures about his miserable behaviour towards you, to visit you and renew your flowers—saw you in the hospital bed, looking so sickly small that Heiji felt like wanting to leave immediately—instead he took a deep breath and took a seat next to you, giving you a small greeting and when Heiji saw your fear filled eyes—sending the heart rate monitor high on alert, nurse rushing inside and ready to give you sedations if necessary—the feeling of guilt skyrocketed high inside of him.

~~~

It has taken Heiji the whole summer and half of his first highschool year, to make you forgive him—albeit not completely—for his hurtful actions towards you and remotely, with lots of encouragement—Kazuha doing the most of it—to bring your smile, which he started to love, back on your lips.

Heiji couldn't even remember anymore, why he had been that way—like an utter complete petty asshole—towards you, maybe because he didn't wanted to be forced to marry a stranger who he never could love—and whatever the reason had been, Heiji had promised himself to never let it happen again.

And with the passing time, Heiji did start to love you—cherishing every moment he could have with you—butterflies rumbling through his stomach whenever he saw your smile—the bright one, which only had been reserved for him—and his heart beating a marathon whenever he could hold hands with you, without you flinching or withdrawing in stiffness.

»So, since when exactly are you engaged?«

»Since birth actually, but with official meeting one another, since middle school« Heiji had been elbowed by Kazuha, bringing him out of his remising thoughts, so he could answered the question.

»And you're really okay with that?«

»Wouldn't want it any other way.«

And Heiji meant it truly, heart soaring with love whenever you around and Heiji wants to be together with you, as long as possible.

~~~

Once coming home in the late afternoon—greeting his mother in the living room, when passing by on his way to the separate house wing—Heiji smiled like a guy in utter luck, couldn't wait to gift you the mini cakes he had brought for you, hoping you weren't asleep already.

Seeing you sitting on the sofa in the living room, entranced by some nature documentary on the television, Heiji creeps closer—bending down to your ear and whisper an hello—startling you in the process, making you flinch your shoulders upwards in surprise—before sitting next to you, Heiji sat the box of pastries goods down onto the table.

»You didn't need to, Heichi,« you told him, saying a „thank you“ afterwards anyway, when you took one of the cakes—noticing it's mostly (f.flavour)—and taking a few bites, humming contently when the flavour dissolves on your tongue.

»I wanted to tho,« was all he said, a slight shrug with it.

And Heiji—although hesitantly at first to do this, but bold enough to give it a try—put his arm around your shoulders and pulled you into his side—and Heiji thought you would've pulled away right away, knowing it was much more intimate contact you two had every exchange before, but you didn't.

And then, even more bolder than before, Heiji leaned down—giving you a small kiss on the forehead, making you cuddle more into his side.

[nordickies]

Hello, you are my finnish expert. IMPORTANT QUESTION,, is Tino Väinämöinen a real name? Or should I change it to something else in my fic, xx

Hello! To simply answer your question: No, it's not a real name

Väinämöinen is not a name in Finland, instead, it's the name of a primary character in Finnish mythology - the old wise wizard. It's like naming any of the Scandinavians Thor or Odin, it's too on the nose. The only information I could find is that Väinämöinen is the second or third name of 20 Finnish men. And it's definitely not a last name! So, if that kind of thing bothers you, I would recommend changing it

Väinämö, on the other hand, is a legit Finnish last name! And Väinö is an extremely common first or second name. Those would be more natural name options for Finland

Little fun fact, if you have done any research on Finland/Finnish people, you might have noticed a lot of the last names end in the suffix -nen (Korhonen, Järvinen, Häkkinen, Räikkönen). In Eastern Finland, surnames began to appear in the early 16th century, making Finland the first Nordic country to do so. But surnames weren't required by law until the 19th century. Eastern Finnish surnames often contained the name of the founder of the family (which could be ancient name by that point, since the surname tradition was so old) or people derived their last name from surrounding nature. The suffix -nen is used in Finnish language to express affection, so Eastern Finnish last names are techically terms of endearment, which is kind of cute

Surnames arrived later in West Finland, where the last names got the suffix - la, usually after the farm or house name (Rantala, Mattila, Ojala). Before the arrival of surnames, most people had patronyms! (Kallenpoika, Erikinpoika, Juhanpoika) But the trend didn't continue after the introduction of required surnames. Most people were drawn to take names inspired by nature, in the Eastern style. Thus the suffix -nen is so common! And immediate give-away that a surname is of Finnish origin

Giving Finland a Swedish last name is not wrong either, in a historical setting at least. Especially nobility, clergy and bourgeoisie had names that derived from Swedish culture. However, lots of people Finnishized their last names at the turn of the 20th century, meaning they translated their Swedish surnames directly into Finnish - motivated by their interest in "rediscovering lost" Finnish culture and rebelling against the ongoing Russification of the time. It was done by both poor farmers and intellectuals alike due to national campaigns. Nevertheless, there are still lots of Swedish surnames in Finland

So, to make things confusing, Finland has three predominant surname traditions: the West Finnish, the East Finnish and Swedish-Finnish

Tino is a name found in Finland, but it's not of Finnish origin. Instead, it comes from Italy, being a nickname of names such as Constantino, Valentino, etc. Using it in a modern setting (21st century) is acceptable, but doesn't really make sense in historical fiction. Instead, you can use Timo - Which is the 2nd most common male Finnish name and very old as it's the Finnish version of "Timotheus"

Finland has a lot of Scandinavian influence, so you can find names like Mathias, Mikael, Johannes, Elias, Emil, etc on the most popular names list. But I would highly recommend checking out native Finnish names because there are many of them! They're unique, and not found anywhere else in the world - and Finnish people prefer to give Finnish names to their children. Also, middle name(s) are basically a norm in Finland. So if you're trying to come up with a human name for Fin, consider giving him a second name. In official documents, you're required to write down which name is your "kutsumanimi" (calling name). It is the name by which a person is normally identified in conversation, their prefered name

Also, Finland is the land of nicknames! People rarely use their given names with friends and family, it can be seen as too formal. If your name is Tino, you might use nicknames like Tintsa, Timpe or Tinke. If your name is Timo, you're guaranteed to be called Timppa

[variousqueerthings]

i find it easier to talk about aroace themes in doctor who than in good omens, because i know there was quite a fraught anti-aroace read of the characters that at best ignored the fanbase that was aroace and generally treated it as non-queer in concept -- heck, I wasn't and I'm not even really in in the fanbase (except as extension of doctor who and david tennant and generally enjoying it) and I had to unfollow a heck of a lot of blogs because of a sentiment that was very dismissive of ideas around non-(cis)gendered-allosexual-amatonormative reads of the characters, because it was considered "copping out" of Real Queer Reads of the text, and only really accepted it as Really Queer once The Kiss happened -- so I can only imagine how much it must have sucked for aroace fans of the show who were actively engaging with the fandom and felt that alienation x 1000

and it's interesting because The Kiss does not in fact make the characters less able to be read from a non-(cis)gendered aroace perspective, it's just that kisses are one of the acceptable shorthands for alloromantic allosexual textual reads, so The Kiss in fact makes people less likely to engage with complicated reads of the text (I say like that was happening in the first place), not because it doesn't work, but because amatonormativity accepts only certain semiotics of relationships as "real" or "valuable" while other relationships that don't fulfill these criteria are "merely good friends" and good friends... is ostensibly a non-queer thing to be (does not tangent about relationship anarchy and religious themes, slaps wrist)

all that being said, crowley and aziraphale absolutely do exist within an asexual aromantic agender (aspec) framework, and amatonormativity especially does shut down a lot of the interesting ways one can engage with these characters and the text that they interact with because of their non-normative place within any of the three worlds that are depicted in the story (heaven, hell, earth) -- they do not perform roles that are easily definable, or even acceptable, in these spaces. they get read as queer multiple times in both s1 and s2, but in ways that are simplistic to who they are and what their relationship has been up until that point. that boxing in is one of the reasons they struggle to find words during the last fifteen minutes of s2, because there are only so many "correct" "allowed" ways to relate to one another, and none of them fit, beyond the fun little word "us." which was who they were from s1 already, when they ostensibly weren't queering the text enough -- all of this is ironic because it's how they're treated in the text and by audience

unsure yet if I will talk about it more, because I think... it is still fraught. but I am thinking more about how I read from the framework of aspec experiences and the ways people have blind spots about their own especially amatonormativity, but also allosexual and cisnormative reads that play into how queerness is allowed to exist onscreen only if fulfilling specific semiotic criteria, and not as something that's actually deep and interesting, like theme or story structure or character arc

[sourpatchys]

Chapter One: It Begins

Time: Quarry

Rating: PG, nothing explicit

Word Count: 1.5k

Summary: Two souls connected by fate and severed by ignorance. However, with the world changing and medication fading, they will have no choice but to face the truth. Female reader!

A/N: This chapter is much shorter than the ones in the future will be— I wanted to get some solid ground to stand on, and I feel like I did that here!

—

The topic of soulmates wasn't one for the weak of heart. It wasn't a rare occurrence, but it wasn't common by any means— it fell in a middle ground of the unknown. scientists and doctors alike took the concept at face value, never batting an eye to the phenomenon that plagued so many people.

It was a topic that most of the world viewed as taboo. And you, by a stretch of bad luck, became part of the equation.

At 16 years old— your dreams took the form of memories— only they weren't yours to remember.

Sometimes, they were fun, with laughter and warmth— and other times you swore you felt blood pouring down your spine as a sick, cold, darkness consumed you. The pain in these dreams almost felt real, and as you woke you swore there would be markings— yet there never were.

You never dared to tell anyone. The few people you'd seen who openly had soulmates weren't exactly socially accepted, they were "claimed", and no one wanted to be near them.

"Freaks of nature" is what your father called them— and by extension— what he had unknowingly called you.

At 18, you finally told your doctor. Now without the threat of your parents and peers finding out, you felt safe enough to get prescribed a "dream repellent". One used to keep up social norms, to ignore the soulmate bond all together.

Sometimes you really wish you had told someone close to you— maybe then you could've found your other half, maybe you wouldn't have needed the pills at all.

Even as someone with soul bond— you knew next to nothing about it. You chose to live in ignorance. You didn't want to think of the life you may have had, the life chosen for you.

It had been years since your last dream. Years since you heard the muffled cries of the person you were supposed to love.

And now, with no medication available, you have no choice but to face them. Potentially for the rest of your life.

You knew they were still alive somewhere, even with your limited knowledge on the subject, one thing was certain— when a soulmate dies, the other is always quick to follow.

It had been at least two months since the outbreak— and if your soulmate had died, you definitely wouldn't be alive and kicking as you were.

You were lucky enough to have found a group of survivors. Georgia was not your usual playing ground, and you were almost sure the world would've taken you with it, if it hadn't been for the kindness of Lori and the others.

Your dreams, for better or worse, hadn't started back up again, quite honestly you were hoping they never would. Even without the societal norm hanging over your head— you were afraid.

You had never felt love, or lust— not even the pull of attraction towards a childhood crush. You were, by all means, taken for, by someone you had never met.

You were sure, feeling all of those things for the first time in your adult life— would kill you.

The group you were staying with were kind people, you never went a day without food or water and Shane, the self appointed leader of the group, never shot you down if you wanted to learn a new skill. Dale, who you had jokingly deemed the groups father figure, never bat an eye when you talked to him about silly things. They were truly a found family, one you could call your own.

There were a couple people, namely, Ed, Merle and Daryl, that you avoided. They didn't seem to care for the groups makeshift family dynamic, and you weren't about to try and convince them otherwise.

Geeks you could handle, when shit hit the fan you had taken out more than just a few, but people were another thing entirely.

Even before the fall, public places always kept you on your toes, you never knew what someone else was capable of or what they were thinking. So you bid your time by playing with the children, helping Carl with the homework his mom had given him that day, and folding laundry with Carol.

Overall, it was a pretty sweet gig— given the circumstances.

That didn't mean it was flowers and rainbows all the time though, fights tended to break out more often than not recently.

"I'm tellin' you right now, if you don't get me on that run I'm takin' my brother and we're getting the fuck out of here!" Merle screamed, marching his way up to Shane as he threw his arms around in a rage.

"You know, without you and your brother we're down two fighters and a hunter— we need you here, not out there."

"Oh is that so?" Merle backed up, moving himself mockingly as he continued "You'll let a carpet muncher and a scrawny Chinese kid go, but not one'a yer' fighters? Is that it?"

Shane rubbed at his face with his hands, clearly trying to find a way to step away from the conversation entirely.

"Listen man— you can go, but if yer' goin' then Daryl's gotta take all the hunting on, he's gonna be out there, by himself, for at least a full 24 hours— are you willin'ta risk that?"

Merle sneered and started to laugh, raising his arms out to his sides in victory.

"My little brother can handle himself bossman, it ain't no hair off my back if he's by himself."

Contrary to Merles words, Daryl wasn't too keen on the idea once he was clued in. He didn't hate going by himself, it was a lot easier to stay quiet and track without someone in your ear, but the fact he was used as a bargaining chip got under his skin more than he expected.

"You can't just say stuff like that man. I wasn't even there."

The sun had set by this point, its last shining rays slowly disappearing under the horizon, the soft glow from the campfire taking its place.

"Oh, common' its no biggie, I get out and get my stash, and you get to stay here and play fairys in the woods. Sounds like a good deal to me, little brother."

Daryl kept his eyes casted to the ground, keeping his hands busy by sharpening his knife on a river rock he had found earlier in the day. Sometimes Merle got to him more than he'd like to admit, at times he just gave up, not willing to start something he wasn't prepared to finish.

The elder sat up straight, a gleam of mischief shining in his eyes as he took in his brothers demeanor.

"You're gettin' those dreams again, ain't you little brother?"

The dreams.

They had stopped years ago, everyone he told thought he was crazy. For a while, hyped up on whatever substances he could get his hands on, he believed he truly was immortal, that the world had made a sick mistake.

Soulmate connections aren't supposed to just stop, not unless there aren't any memories left to give, and yet he was still alive and well. And if they did stop— they definitely weren't supposed to start again.

"Nah, they haven't."

Merle stood, clapping his hand on Daryl's shoulder as he walked himself over to their shared tent, seemingly content with the lackluster conversation they managed to have.

"Good thing, I don't want you gettin' all emotional before we get ourselves outta here, I don't need you bailing on me over some pansy that might not even be alive."

Merle sure knew how to get under Daryl's skin. The fact that his soul bond could be a geek had never even crossed his mind until now. The level of uncertainty creeping up his spine was just enough to drive him mad.

—

The next morning was mostly uneventful, your chores stayed the same as any other day, Daryl went off to find some game, and Glenn's group headed out to Atlanta for supplies.

The only major difference was the amount of people who had left, leaving a much quieter overtone settled over the quarry.

The silence was almost unnerving, the children weren't playing, the loudest person in camp was gone, and Dale wasn't telling his usual stories, too worried about Andrea.

As the day carried on, you found yourself floating between tasks, a looming sense of anxiety holding itself over your head. You weren't entirely sure why— there was plenty to be anxious about—  but it wasn't a feeling caused by anything you could see or hear, it was a sharp feeling, as if ants were crawling under your skin.

Up until this point, you had almost prided yourself in your ability to keep your composure, you had you moments of terror, you'd screamed and cried, but if nothing was happening in the moment, it was easy for you to ignore it all together. Today— you couldn't ignore it.

Snapping you out of your dazed state, you heard a screaming car alarm ripping through the mountains.

"What is that?!" You called, fidgeting where you stood, your heart beating a million miles per hour. Something was seriously wrong with you.

And then you saw it— a bright red car hurdling through the mountains.

Something inside you knew— they had finally come back.

Next chapter

[jenni41]

Thoughts on Buddy Daddies:

Like most of the Buddy Daddies Fandom it seems, I am torn between QPR Kazurei and gay life partners Kazurei. But these are my currently running headcanons.

Kazuki seems like a bi who mostly likes the ladies but is comfortable enough with himself to break gender norms and have a queer relationship.

I definitely think Rei is on the autism spectrum, or he could just be traumatized from his abusive and neglectful upbringing. He comes across as aroace but I like to imagine him demi-grey. Or maybe just repressed gay because he was taught to bury his feelings and his dad's a homophobic ass who threatens to kill those Rei loves if they are a hindrance to his goals for Rei.

I definitely think Rei's dad thinks he is gay and he thought this before Kazuki was even in the picture. In his mind, he gave Rei a few years to "get it out of his system" as long as he promised to come back, learn the business, and continue the blood line. (I know first hand, it is not something you can get out of your system - I just think the Boss thinks this).

Rei doesn't deny it either. In fact, his speech about all the things he experienced with his family doubles down on it.

I love that everyone around them thinks they are in a gay relationship, and besides a little discomfort at the first daycare interview, they hardly bat an eye at it. They just accept it.

Rei's declaration of "I want to be a real family" floats in my head rent-free, too. Like, weren't you that before? What are you doing differently this time that you didn't the first time to make it real? Maybe he was holding back his emotions before and now he is going to let himself get more attached?

Miri's quote about Kazuki sneaking out to be with the ladies during the time jump annoyed me. It wasn't necessary other than some execs attempting to sink the ship because God forbid people think they were really gay. Which is so weird cause everyone in and watching the show kinda thinks that anyway? I am willing to bet that 80% of people who choose to watch this anime already have their assumptions. Like who is choosing to watch the whole series and then go, "Woo, thank god. They aren't gay. That was a close one." Like without the line, Shippers can ship their perceived canon and those who are just in it for the buddy comedy or Ace Rei can have their cake and eat it too.

So I can either pretend she didn't say it or imagine that Kazurei are still together and have an intimate relationship of their own, not necessarily sexual, and the relationship is an open one so Kazuki can go get his rocks off but still come home to love on Rei?

Anyways, I loved what I could watch. I hope Crunchy Roll fixes the dub and sub issues so I can watch the whole thing. The No Sweet Without Sweat episode has no dub or subs and then episode 11 has episode 10s subs and dubs and episode 12 is not available so I have been spoiling myself on YouTube.

[lix88888]

Eldritchtale: The Child with a Thousand Eyes

Frisk had always known there was something off about Ink.

The impulsive Protector was unlike anyone Frisk had ever seen or known, and given their omniscience, that was quite a tall order. Error, too, was similarly perplexing, but he was also much simpler: Frisk could comprehend his hatred and disdain for life, even if they couldn't understand it or empathize, and he was far from the only person in the Multiverse who had snapped and turned to violence, even if he was the most brutal.

No, Ink was the real enigma, someone Frisk could never seem to figure out. This didn't have anything to do with the fact that Ink sometimes seemed to forget social norms, or didn't react appropriately to emotions, or even about his conflicting actions. Those, Frisk could rationalize and unravel.

Ink simply was, more like a force of nature than a person, always living in the moment and experiencing life to the fullest, only guided by the desire to protect the Multiverse, and you could either get with the flow or be left behind. Dream, who tended to see things in binary and especially put Ink on a pedestal, struggled to understand this: more than once, the grey child had unwittingly witnessed the Guardian of Positivity argue with Ink when they failed to meet his expectations, the betrayal and disappointment clear on his face, while Ink always looked confused at best and uncaring at worst.

What unsettled Frisk, what unnerved them, was something deeper, that they couldn't fully articulate, some instincts that screamed at the child that Ink was not as they seemed. After pondering for a long while, they arrived at the conclusion that it was a mix of not being able to see inside the Doodlesphere (Ink had explained that, just like the Antivoid, his pocket dimension was less of an AU and more of a space in-between, thus escaping Frisk's sight) and the fact that Ink was soulless, so he would probably always have to pretend to some degree, even with their paints.

It intrigued Frisk, the mystery that was Ink: there weren't many things hidden from them, so the child somewhat welcomed the confusion and uneasiness Ink brought, ignoring the alarm bells ringing in their head in favor of managing the Omega Timeline and helping people, accepting that were things they couldn't know despite the powers the fall into the CORE gave them. It was something to think about, a fun little puzzle for them to ponder on in-between duties.

What would Ink do next? Who would they hang out with? What mess would they cause, and who would have to fix it? Frisk's latest guess was on Lust, things had been too quiet on Underlust recently.

Oh! Speak of the devil, Ink was sprawled on a beach in a steampunk AU, simply relaxing in the sun. There wasn't anything that was truly urgent at the moment (Frisk was only having 4 different conversations at once) so they decided to watch him, curious to see what they would do next. They were in luck as, only a couple minutes later, the Protector got up, stretched and took out his trusty brush to create a portal. As soon as they jumped in, Frisk scanned the Multiverse for them, but as they falied to find him, the child concluded Ink was in the Doodlesphere, and they huffed in frustration.

The Protector's domain was as strange as its owner: Frisk was unable to project their consciousness there with the same ease as they could everywhere else. They had done so, on occasion, but since the action required for them to be disconnected from the Multiverse itself, they did it only in the direst of circumstances, and even then, only briefly. It wouldn't do to leave the Multiverse without its watcher.

Still, everything was fine now...

Deciding to spy on Ink a bit, Frisk giggled mischieviously and entered without letting Ink know. They couldn't wait to give him a scare!

And then

they

S̵̢͓͍̠͙͎̙̹̆̾̀̀͝ ̵̡͖̰̪͚̹̪̮̙̍̿̇͑͒͌͜͝͠͝Ả̸̛̮͚̄͘ ̸̢̩̻̩̤͈̻͙͙̱̪͔̮͕̩̮̄̈͐͑̽̔͌͋̉̈́͂͘͘͝͝W̷̤͓̹̻̙̪̬͋̒̀̋̆

MAKEITSTOPMAKEITSTOPMAKEITSTOPMAKEITSTOPMAKEITSTOPMAKEITSTOPMAKEITSTOPMAKEITSTOPMAKEITSTOP

It's b̴̗̔̑̆̈́̅͊͆͘ ̴͉̱̩̌́̈̿̔e̶̡̡̧̡̱̹͚̤̳̤̣̠͍̠̯̘͆͂̉̊̄̔ͅå̷̗̤̀͋̎̃̓̚̕͘u̴̺̖̻̭̺͑͒͝͝ ̵̨̣̰̪͓̙͊́̿̆́̋̓̎̿̾̽̇̕͝ͅt̴̜͇̬͖̮̘̩͖͔̯̹̂̾̑̋ͅǐ̷̘̫̟̱̞͛̈̓̈́͆̚F̴̛͍͕̅̒́̐͛̑̀̈́̑̓͊̎̅̊͠U̴̡̧̲̫̼̺̮͉͇̳͙͎͓͈̦̽̐̎̑̉͒͋́̀̍̈́L̵̼͚̹̭͇̠̎̈́̊̂͋̄̿͂̚͝

IT'S HORRIBLE

It's everything

IT IS NOTHING

it's wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong

i̸̜͖̒t̶̰̓͜'̷̡́s̶̩̍ ̷̢̬͑͝S̶̭̋O̴̫̻̽͠ ̴̻̑̈́R̶̻̚i̷̛͍̭g̵̢̯̐͘h̴̦̾t̴͙̣̄̌

It's unreal

It's the only real thing here

THE

ONLY

REAL

THING

"Oops, got you!"

Frisk found themselves kneeling, their forehead touching the ground as they took a shuddering breath, shaking all over, their sense of sight returning in bursts. What had happened?

What had they seen?

"You know you gotta warn me if you want to come here. I was stretching and all of a sudden you pop up!"

Startled, Frisk raised their head and found themselves face to face with Ink. Creator. Frisk couldn't move or speak, only shake in terror.

Ink frowned in displeasure (sending a spike of fear through Frisk) and their pupils changed to a green question mark and a blue teardrop as he said: "Ah, are you all there? I thought I put you back together okay, but maybe-" As his hand moved towards them, Frisk opened their mouth and let out a hoarse: "No please." Don't touch me don't come any closer stay away I'm scared I'm scared Ink smiled and took a step back, his pupils back to their default state. "Ah, so you can speak! Good, that's good! I was afraid you couldn't anymore! But can you understand me though? Nod if you can."

The child's head jerked forward despite themselves. They still hadn't stopped shaking, and they didn't think they could ever again. Ink was- Ink was-

"Perfect!" Ink sat down, cross-legged, and leaned a bit, making Frisk lurch back to get away from them. The Protector (Creator) didn't seem to notice. "I guess you have questions?" Frisk opened their mouth once, twice, but no words were coming out. How could they even make sense of what had just happened, let alone ask questions about it? Ink was- Ink was-

"W-what are you?" Ink laughed. "Straight to the hard ones, don't we? Well, let's put it this way kid: you know how sometimes I have to correct people, and tell them I'm a Protector, not a Creator?" A silence fell, until Frisk realized Ink was waiting for an answer, and nodded. Ink gave a smile full of too many sharp, sharp teeth, their pupils two golden stars, and whispered: "I'm lying." Frisk felt on the verge of a panic attack, their vision starting to tunnel, their breath loud to their ears, until Ink put his fingers in front of their face and snapped them once: immediately, they felt devoid of any emotions.

Utterly numb.

"What did you do to me?" Their voice was so frighteningly monotone. "Oh, just a small thing. I know you're a very determined soul" he snorted at the pun "and that you'd be disappointed if your emotions made you unable to ask me things! Also, I'm excited! You're the second person to figure me out, and I really want to know what you want to know! So for now, your feelings are blocked! Ask away!"

Frisk paused for a second, considering themselves; just like Ink had said, their feelings were almost gone. The child knew, intellectually, what they were supposed to feel at the moment (shock, horror, fear, anger), but it was like the emotions themselves were locked behind a glass wall, able to be seen but not interacted with. Frisk took a deep breath and nodded: Ink was right, they needed to get as much knowledge as possible on whatever Ink was, what their intentions with the Multiverse were, what were his powers (if they could be killed).

"What are you, really?" "Mh, I don't really know how to describe it in terms that would make sense to you, really. I think some would describe me as "eldritch"? But simply put, I'm a Monster." Somehow, Frisk could feel the capitalization. "So, you're not really a Sans." "Ahaha, nope! And before you ask, you can't see what I truly look like, I think one glimpse was enough, wasn't it?" Despite their blocked emotions, Frisk felt a shiver of terror running down their spine. Unconcerned, Ink went on. "I have to say, you were in a bit better shape than many other mortals who gazed at my True Form. I think your displacement among time and space somehow made you more resistant? I'll check your code later about it." "I thought you couldn't use codes."

Ink's smile was condescending, and yet almost kind at the same time. "I was lying, obviously. I didn't want to be too OP, you know?" "So, all of your past is a lie." "Yep!" "What's the truth?" "Now, why would I answer that?" Ink became liquid and changed position, reappearing on the ground, chin in their hand and legs swaying in the air "There's no fun in that. Next question!" Frisk thought about it. It was clear Ink wouldn't tell them things if they asked questions that were too specific. "Do we have free will, or did you plan everyone's story from the beginning?" "Mh, good question, I wouldn't have thought you'd ask something like this! The first one, it's much more interesting! I made many of the AUs, but only the basis, their respective alternate timelines develop on their own, like flowers on a branch!"

"Do you care about anything?" Ink pouted, their pupils changing into a pale blue teardrop and yellow oval. "I care about everything inside my Multiverse. You're all my beautiful creations: so interesting, unique and complex." "And yet, you let suffering, death, and people like Error and Nightmare exist with no problem." "It would be very boring otherwise, don't you think? Suffering and death make a story interesting, even when sometimes Error messes things up he creates new possibilities I would have never imagined. That's why Nightmare and Dream are one of the things I'm most excited about: did you know, I didn't make them? That was all Nim! Everything that happened to them was all original, so I don't know how things will end! So cool!" If Frisk still had their emotions, they probably wouldn't have paid it any mind, but in their state, something in how the phrase was constructed caught their attention. "Error is another Monster, isn't he?" Had their Multiverse been unknowingly caught in the middle of a battle between two godly entities? Error had said he had "reformed" and there had been peace for a year till then, but would it last?

Ink's pupils changed to an orange exclamation point and a yellow star. "Smart cookie! Yup, Ruru is a Monster like me!" Ink's eyes turned into two pink hearts "He's My Mate!" Not quite was Frisk was expecting, and yet it made sense. The child wouldn't presume to know the intricacies of Monster's love. What if the destruction was a courting custom? Would Error bring even greater ruin to them as a gift to Ink? "Why did he use to destroy?" "Well, you see, Error has always been a bit jealous, and he got very grumpy when I made the Multiverse and started staying here. He went on and on about me "neglecting him" and whatnot, so he decided to throw a tantrum, but I knew he'd get over it soon enough, and I was right! Barely two millennia and he has calmed down." Ink giggled "Oh, he'll HATE that I told you, but I don't care, he kinda deserves it for acting like a child."

Two thousand years of suffering and pain for all of the Multiverse, countless AUs destroyed, multitudes of people killed, traumatized, scarred, entire civilizations obliterated... and Ink called it a short tantrum.

"Are there any other Monsters inside the Multiverse at the moment?" Ink tilted their skull a bit, visibly considering the question as one of his pupils changed into a green spiral. "You know what? You guessed Ruru, so this one's a freebie: there's only one other Monster in the Multiverse right now, and it's Mistake."

...the cat?

"Error's cat?" "She's not strictly a cat but... yes. She doesn't have the same level of sentience as me and Error, and he kept her as a sort of pet even when we weren't here, so he decided to bring her along after he finally admitted that my Multiverse is awesome." Frisk started to nod, and then the previous sentence caught up with them. "You said Mistake is the only other Monster besides you two right now. Are there more coming?" Ink looked positively giddy. "You catch on quickly! There's gonna be a couple of new additions in the coming years, but as for who they are... that's a secret. Wouldn't do to spoil the plot all at once now, would it?" They winked "However, if you or anyone else wants to try and guess who there two new mysterious charaters are gonna be, you're welcome to try!"

Frisk took a moment to center themselves and take stock of what else they needed to ask. "Can you elaborate more about Dream and Nightmare?" "Sure! You see, when I started making the Multiverse, I realized quickly that it would need some sort of control system-"

===========================

Frisk drifted for hours after that.

Eventually, Ink had gotten bored of answering questions and told them it was time for Frisk to go back to the Multiverse; after a small warning about not telling anyone else what they had learned, the child had been ejected from the Doodlesphere while they regained their emotions. The panic and existential dread had set in soon after.

Their lack of a body had also not helped them calm down: they had nothing to ground themselves with, and the child was too agitated to try and manifest in an AU, any AU, to feel something other than the depth of their own insignificance and meaninglessness, as time and space moved around them in an infinite whirlwind.

They, their friends, their enemies, they were all playthings for an higher being, and while that was something that Ink and Error had both implied many times (another lie, the existence of many Creators, who talked with Error and who had breathed life into Ink. Or was there something even more powerful than Monsters?), it was one thing to accept the fact that something had made them and watched them from afar, and quite another to see your God standing in front of you, laughing and telling you the whole time you were only meant to be entertaining, that he walked among you and pushed and prodded at everything, seeing how far things could go until they broke.

Even after their mental breakdown subsided and they became rational again, Frisk decided against taking a form for the moment: after all, they could still see everything anyway, but they... they couldn't interact with other puppets people at the moment. And so, they drifted, looking at everything around them, trying to find meaning in the simulation they were living in.

"Homie, can ya hear me?" It was Fresh. Whatever, he of all people Frisk didn't want to see: they didn't mind the fact that he was emotionless, but his presence was the LAST thing they needed. "I know ya spoke wid Inkblot. Wanna chat about it?"

Did... did Fresh knew?

Frisk hesitated: they still wanted to be alone, to not actually think about what had happened to them, but the possibility of talking with someone who understood, even a little bit...

Unsure, Frisk materialized in front of him, inside the Outertale variant he was in. The parasite peered down at them from above, and tilted his skull with a small grimace as his glassed spelled DA-NG. Frisk had to look much worse than they thought if Fresh had this reaction.

The other took a step back and sat on the edge of the asteroid they were standing on, patting the space next to him. Frisk walked almost mechanically and sat beside him. The child felt the urge to lean on the parasite, but ignored it, deciding instead to hug themselves. They could feel themselves shaking a bit.

"How long have you known?" Fresh didn't look at them, keeping his gaze on the horizon. "A while. I don't remember when, for sure, but yearz." Years. Frisk felt like screaming only a few hours after finding out, and Fresh just went on living as normal. Who says that being emotionless doesn't have its perks? "How did you find out? Did you see-" "Nah homie, did ya?" Fresh let out a long whistle "Surprised ya noggin isn't scrambled like an egg." "Ink put it back together." Frisk said in a hoarse voice, as they hugged themselves tighter, their trembling increasing. The mere thought of trying to remember was- A hand gently landed on their head, shaking them out of their stupor. "Das rough, homie. Musta been spooky." Was Fresh trying to comfort them? The situation was so absurd (the emotionless, soul-sucking parasite trying to comfort the immortal, omnipresent child) that Frisk barked out a small laugh, though it sounded more like a shout than anything. "You have no idea." Fresh's hand in their hair gripped a bit tighter, just a fraction, as the parasite said: "I do, actually."

Their voice was slightly strained, but for him to emote even a bit was monumental. Frisk turned to look at him, and the parasite did the same. His glasses now spelled SCA-RED. "Ya know I have one feel, and one feel only, homie: fear. Das wat keepz me alive. And knowing wat Inkblot and Glitchy really are, and dat I can't do anything tah defend mahself, das scary." Abruptly, Fresh turned his skull back towards the horizon, but left his hand on Frisk's head. The child let themselves be grounded by the feeling of Fresh's fingers in their gray hair for a bit, and then asked again: "How did you find out?" Fresh took a bit to respond. "I alwayz knew Inkblot waz bad news. Deir vibes are rancid, and it's not because he's empty. Wen I'm near dem, I alwayz feel like..." Fresh trailed off, and as Frisk glanced back at him, his glasses spelled PR-EY "Like he iz dangerous. Glitchy too, but dat waz obvious. And so, one day I asked. And he told me." "Just like that?" Fresh hummed in assent. "Uh-uh. Inkblot waz so excited dat I found him and Glitchy out, and even wanted me to possess dem to see wat would happen."

Fresh's glasses now spelled WEI-RDO, making his opinion of Ink very clear and managing to make Frisk crack a smile: God is a weirdo, you heard it here first, folks! ...They were starting to understand why many Sanses turned to comedy as a coping mechanism against existential dread. "Did you do it?" "Obvz, I didn't have no clue of wat Inkblot woulda done if I said no." his glasses turned completely black and his smile dropped "I will never do it again. He almost consumed me."

And after that delightful bit of news, silence fell again on the couple for a while. Fresh didn't remove his hand, and Frisk didn't ask him to.

"I'm sorry." Frisk eventually said, leaning against the parasite. "No use being sorry, homie. We just gotta go on and play it smart. It's tah only thing we can do." Fresh moved his hand from their head and put it on their shoulders, pulling them a bit closer, almost like a hug. "And hope Inkblot don't get bored too soon."

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