#people in my family are just very disconnected from like
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jrkyy · 3 days ago
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Hello! I Love your young Howard designs (especially his Prince Charming hair) and his vibes. Do you have any headcanons or backstory for him that you can share? Thank youu <3
Dont call him prince charming, you’re feeding his fragile ego with that
As the matter of fact I do! I just keep it to myself most of the time out of shyness. Honestly idk where to begin, I have them scattered on my notes so here’s just a few of them
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Before I go to his childhood, I want to establish that his parents were from a new money background and his father is new to biglaw. He wanted to blend in with the old money crowd so he started to mimic how they dress, act, etc. (And yes I do think he would pour this onto his son)
His mother on the other hand is a hairdresser. Unlike george, she doesnt want to dress like his “rich friends”. I havent thought much about her relationship with Howard yet but she mostly acts like the second voice of reason after Chuck (though Mr. Mcgill does that better than her)
I do think that George’s attempt to larp as those upper men is an attempt to get approval from them (that theme runs in the family I guess…)
So for me it really just connects the dots on how Howie’s financial background reflects the things he spent on (ex: gucci loafers, jaguar car, his tuscan style mansion)
When it comes fo his childhood, his parents werent really that stern to him (apart from what would he be in the future). They're the type of parents who would let their kid do anything they want, as long as they would end up being what the parents want. It would bite them both back though (especially george). George would definitely call young Howard selfish or ungrateful, when its his doing in the first place
This is based from one of patrick’s interview, but he was probably very an awkward kid back then. Probably due to him being an only child (or undiagnosed autism), but he struggles a lot on making connections so he would mirror other people’s action or read those “how-to-make-friends 101” books. He knows the right thing to say but he didnt say all that with his heart
A lot of his problems with his father just stems from disconnection. George wanted the very best for his son, but what he thinks that its best is just his tunnel vision of a dream. Whereas Howard just wants to be close to him but each time he does that, George would always do something that absolutely pisses him off so its back to square one
As for his mullet-thing??? Its an attempt to distance himself from his father. He’s scared that people would say he’s similar to George, so he styled it like his mom
Sorry, this is getting too long so I’ll stop here lol but I do have more to spew out
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none-tadashi-left-hiro · 8 months ago
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I just realized my lasts two posts are complete tonal whiplash from my buttsecks post
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bubblesxo · 7 months ago
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I’m sorry but the flat way that the fandom tackles the Enji Todoroki problem is so blegh. Yes, how he treated them (especially Shouto—we don’t 100% know if Touya’s training was the same, especially because he actually liked his training) was wrong, the way he treated his wife was wrong, the way he ignored his other kids is wrong. HOWEVER, him cutting Touya off from training was NOT 100% wrong. Should he have treated it more delicately? Yes. Should he have been more considerate to his kid? Yes. Should he have gotten him some kind of therapy to help him cope with his obvious mental issues? Also yes. But cutting him off from training when he gets hurt doing so and it’s unavoidable is NOT wrong. He was trying to prevent exactly what happened in the end. Maybe he could have revisited it a few years later when training isn’t all Touya is and looked into support items, idk, but Enji’s approach was the right decision in the wrong way.
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tokyotowerboy · 5 months ago
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As an autistic child who didn't fit in anywhere, I always looked at the people I knew with strong ties to their heritage with big ol sparkly eyes. I would constantly pester my family about our heritage. Of course, Native American would be included in the list. Potawatomi, I'd be told, "she was the daughter of the chief," someone claimed at some point... Then I grew up, learned history, studied anthropology, and all together came to realize that any native heritage I had (if I had any to begin with) was nothing more than a "fun fact" to my family. It didn't mean anything to anyone.
I was still curious, though, and through working on a family tree for a few years, I realized I did have "native heritage," an x-times great grandma who was Shawnee. It made me wonder a lot of things. Did she pass on any of her culture to her children, or, for any of the numerous reasons that would have prevented/pressured her to not, didn't? And if she did teach her children, when did it stop being passed down? At what point did she stop being our grandmother and start being a "fun fact"?
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infizero · 1 year ago
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every time i so much as think about that scene where light looks at porn magazines while scowling i go into hysterics its genuinely the funniest thing i've ever seen
#the funniest thing is is that i truly believe he thought he was being 100% convincing. that that's normal behavior for a completely straight#completely allosexual man#light is fucking awful and i hate him but also there's nuance to him. and sometimes i can get a little like. oh thinking about his life#before the series. specifically factoring in my headcanons about him being gay aroace and autistic and stuff. ppl have written some rlly#good fics surrounding those topics.... but yeah thats not even canon stuff but i dont care#anyways its not in a way of making excuses for how he is i just think it adds more to his character#hes total garbage but i think theres really interesting stuff with him when it comes to how he's.... VERY disconnected from others#just in general. he's like aware of how to act ''normal'' on like the most textbook surface level without being like. Aware enough to#be able to make it more convincing. and as ridiculous as it is i do see some of myself in him in that sense#also that person who said light and L is just autistic guy who's been masking his entire life vs autistic guy who's never masked in his#entire life. LITERALLY EXACTLY. genuinely perfect way to describe them they are both so similar when it comes to this#but the ways they go about it are very different. light has been playing the part of the perfect son his whole life. L doesnt try to change#himself for anyone and doesnt care when people think hes weird. both of them arent very socially aware and havent had any real friends#their whole lives. its such a fascinating parallel between them#i could go on a whole fucking thing about how light was pretending to be someone he's not around his family and at school and everything#long before he got the death note BUT. i wont. at least not right now#jesus christ how did i go from laughing about him with the magazine to this. my bad#derailed my own damn post. idk swagever#will say rq tho. watched a vid on youtube that pointed out how light expected his family to think nothing of the fact that he's gone to#such drastic measures to hide his diary when making the plan with hiding the death note which is like#that level of dedication would NOT be normal. so the fact that light expects his family to think nothing of it......#i mean you could read that as light just once again being socially unaware. but it could also imply that light's family kind of Knows#he's hiding something and just doesn't address it. (he's gay. im talking about him being gay)#the video also referenced this comic that i didnt rb cause the actual premise of it (lawlight wedding) is um.#not at all my kind of thing. BUT it was light describing himself as a house with a basement when his family sees him as a one story house#and i thought that was such a cool analogy#ANYWAYYYSSSS i need to go to bed. thanks if you read my ramblings#serena.txt#death note posting
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kkoraki · 1 year ago
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I wish I had a good metaphor for how my life feels sometimes, because I wish I could say it felt like I was a citizen of Pleasantville but it's so much more surreal and complicated than that
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icewindandboringhorror · 2 months ago
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youtube
golf
#another case where I post something entirely random that has nothing to do with anything I've ever posted here#and seems very different from costumes and cat pictures or etc. but ghbhj..... I could spend hours having pointless conversations#with myself like this. briefly got fixated on making fake chats on this website for a period of like 3 days straight a few months ago#(its 'chat-simulator.com/simulator' I think..???) but I made a ton of them.. one with some random family bickering with each other. another#that was like a magic school group chat with like 8 differnet students helping each other with an assignment#and just talking about things. another was a fake text xonversation between a king's assistant#and someone who was working in the castle kitchens and they were trying to plan a time to meet up to exchange the stuff that the assistant#stole from the king so that the chef could sell the items on a black market or whatever. then this one with just some weird#group of friends trying to plan to meet up to play golf and etc. etc. etc.#Talking to myself has always been one of my favorite hobbies. for some reason it's so fun lol#just making up random discussions people might have#not even entertaining or interesting or funny ones but just like... anything.. it doesn't matter. It could be a 5 hour long discussion abou#cheese or something.#THOUGH maybe that is just an extension of having always been a writer like.......... isn't that basically just what writing is? making up#fake scenarios and conversations between fake people?? lol... But I guess Writing Writing usually has some sort of goal or story you're#trying to tell. Whereas stufff just like ''3 elves discuss their favorite bread toppings for 15 minutes'' has no purpose#and is not even that interesting or cool so there's no reason behind it and is more just silly fun I guess#Aside from the physical health problems and ocd over something bad happening to me or etc. I've often thought I would be good at one#of those 'get locked in a blank white room for 24 hours' type challenges. since I would probably just sit there and be like 'okey. :3#I shall have an elaborate group conversation about elven politics with myself.' and would just pace around the room acting as different#people arguing with each other for like 6 hours lol#ANYWAY.. ultimate recreational activity...#one tiny little glimpse here of the sorts of things that my computer is full of but that i never post lol#Its interesting how communication develops when you're just talking to yourself alone in a vacuum. Sort of like inside jokes between two#best friends that just seem nonsense to everyone else. My folders of things that probably just read as disconnected gibberish or something#but are just mildly amusing to me.#Though also I just realized this is so tiny on tumblr I can barely read it.. hrrm.
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gaylittleguys · 3 months ago
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I’m really not liking bly manor nearly as much as hill house. I feel like the strength of hill house was the family dynamic underpinning everything and made me invested and interested in these characters and how they fit together, and there’s not really anything as compelling here :/ I don’t think I can bring myself to finish the last two and a half episodes. at least not right now.
#also in hill house I feel like everyone’s hauntings/supernatural events were very much a reflection of their own issues yknow#and this just feels scattered#like idgaf about what’s going on I don’t know these people#it’s not like. interesting.#I get that a family is a lot easier to get faster reads on characters and their relationships but ughhghhghhh#everyone seems so disconnected from everyone else it’s like I’m just watching random peoples stories that just happen to be at the same#place in the same show#there’ll be a little bit of oh! I see! 👀 how interesting where are they going to go with this?#and then they just move on to something else#it doesn’t feel as cohesive and doesn’t have the same sense of building up as hill house#also not as scary#my idgaf vibes have cumulated so far on the uncles episode#like who tf if this guy he’s barely been in this show why do I care#this show doesn’t rly have an emotional core#but also isn’t focusing enough on scary horror ghosts either!#feels like it failing at both being a drama and a supernatural horror#and as a romance bc I don’t care about these people nor are their romances compelling#.doc#also some of the accents have been plaguing me since episode one they’re rough#alsoooo I assume it’ll come back but the framing device from ep 1 is so inconsistent why bother#I like Owen and ms grose but also I do hope they also get more interesting#Owen truly seems like a completely random guy that’s just there#I like him but what is he doing there. narratively.
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bouquetface · 4 months ago
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ASTRO OBSERVATIONS 2
ENTIRE chart will influence accuracy.
Mars Square Neptune.
- Floating - these people tend to easily disconnect from the real world.
- Needing music to workout. Tend to hate silence. Need background music or noise.
- Will encounter disappointing men. Father may be unreliable. Father may not be the provider and/or protector. Father doesn’t fit the traditional father role. For my friend w this aspect, this experience created disgust for “weak men”.
Accuracy for you heavily depends on house & sign.
Mars Trine Neptune.
- Often have an artistic hobby - drawing, painting, playing an instrument, etc.
- Often end up developing a physical hobby that brings them peace of mind - gym, yoga, meditation, etc.
- Dislike for conflict. Not likely to fight - verbally or physically. Avoidant behaviours.
Accuracy heavily depends on house & sign.
Saturn Aspects Uranus.
- Sudden change in relationship w authority. Ex: Following rules when young but rebelling against parents when older. Rebelling against what’s expected when older.
- Preferring and/or creating unconventional ways to do things.
- Good teachers. Simplifying complicated things to be easily understood. Creating new effective ways to be productive.
- Conflicted between desire for recognition from authority and desire for freedom.
Accuracy heavily depends on house & sign.
Mars Aspects MC.
- You or others are competitive in the workplace. You can desire leadership positions. You want to be recognized as the best. Or you simply dislike working with others. Prefer independent work.
- May become known for your body (in a good or bad way). People can assume you are physically active. You likely become physically fit. If you are a woman, you can have a reputation for being a “bitch”. You could be assertive and it’s seen as aggressive. You could prioritize your goals, you’re seen as selfish.
- Often I see these people irl have a bad reputation. IRL EX: People see them as assholes. People discuss their sex lives. People label them as sluts. People assume they have eating disorders. It’s just so weird how every single person ik with this aspect has random & untrue rumours spread about them.
- Entrepreneur indicator. However, not a strong one. Would need to check entire chart.
- Career may involve physical activity. Ex: Walking around a lot, physiotherapy, gym teacher, cleaning, etc.
- Conflict between authority figures like parents. A Parent encourages you to be ambitious. A parent pushes you toward choosing a career or finding a job early on.
- Parents who are forced to prioritize work over children due to financial struggle of the family.
- One strong parent. A single parent or one parent takes on most of the burden.
Accuracy heavily depends on house & sign.
Mercury Aspects Ascendant.
- Good texters. Funny and can keep a conversation going.
- Observant. This can make them anxious and/or very talkative.
- Enjoy nicknames, clever slogans and phrases. The kind of person to say things like “whatever floats your boat” “break a leg” “time to hit the sack”
- Fast talkers. Probably been told they talk too much. Using hand gestures to talk. Moving the body a lot when talking. Fast thinking.
- Difficult to relax. Unintentionally blurting things out. Feeling like you misrepresent yourself.
- Indicator of a popular person. Well connected. Could be a good salesman. Funny people.
Accuracy heavily depends on houses and signs.
Neptune Aspects Ascendant.
- People believe they can read you like an open book.
- Wandering vibe. You look lost. You feel lost. You could enjoy feeling directionless or you wish someone would show you the way.
- Expecting or wishing something would happen to help you. Wishing or expecting someone to help you. Feeling like you’re waiting for your dreams to come true.
- Escapism. Fantasy world in your mind. Wishing to live in a different reality.
- Longing and yearning for people, places and things. Feeling like you’re missing something.
- Prone to giving up. Prefer to give up and go with the flow. Dislike for standing up for yourself. Being assertive is difficult. Letting your presence be known is difficult.
- Feeling like you don’t really belong here.
- Tend to live in their own world. They can be unaware of how things they do or say are perceived. Something they randomly say or do without bad intent can be seen as disrespectful or hateful. They may not even realize it until randomly reflecting on it years later. People can have one sided feuds with them for YEARS. it’s almost funny.
Accuracy heavily depends on houses and signs.
Venus Aspect Uranus
- Relationships begin and end suddenly. ghosting and getting ghosted at some point is extremely likely. Experiencing sudden attraction. Getting close very quickly in relationships (romantic, platonic & business)
- Can experience distance in relationships. Could literally be a long distance relationship or emotional distance.
- Possible problem you could encounter: Partners or you can be awkward when expressing love. Lack of physical affection, lack of sincerity, not very romantic. Mostly jokes to avoid serious conversations.
- On the bright side you will have strong initial attraction. Get close fast. Partners can feel like best friends. Likely to be funny and openminded. Partners have unique viewpoints.
- More comfortable expressing oneself over text than in person. All my friends w this have tried dating apps.
- Later in life they develop unique perspectives on love. This is because they end up having non traditional relationships. Ex: poly, long distance relationship, blended families, interracial couples, couple from diff religions or countries, etc.
Accuracy heavily influenced by houses and signs.
MC Aspect Sun
- Desire recognition and praise. May secretly or openly want to make a parent proud. May secretly want to prove themselves to people through career success.
- Desire leadership positions. Secretly can desire fame. They want to be respected and known in their field.
- If negatively placed, it can manifest as being a sore loser. Being envious when others are praised or succeed.
- In squares and oppositions, people can be willing to bend their morals for fame/recognition and success.
- Career can become a big part of your identity. Entrepreneurship indicator.
- Fear of being gossiped about. Fear of people perceiving you in a negative light. People’s opinions matter deeply.
Accuracy heavily influenced by houses and signs.
MC Aspects Pluto
- Desire positions of authority. Desire power over others.
- Later in life, career transforms. Ex: Changing fields, Going to get a higher education later in life, etc. And this is an entrepreneurship indicator.
- Feeling pressure to be successful. Needing to prove yourself to others. May have parents or family members who didn’t support your dreams. Or family with high expectations.
- Hard aspects can end up sacrificing family & relationships for career in some kind of way. Extreme example: Having kids late to advance career. Working long hours or travelling for work. This may not allow you to be with kids or partner that much.
- Be wary these people often end up with a tarnished reputation. They can need to become like a phoenix (rising from the ashes).
- Big indicator of attracting public scrutiny.
Accuracy heavily influenced by houses and sign.
Saturn Aspect Ascendant
- Reserved presence. Observant. Patient & polite. Old soul indicator. Mature. Good mentors/teacher. Indicator of becoming a person in an authoritative position. You may not realize it but people can grow to respect & admire you. Your words have influence on others.
- Good planners. They create long term plans. Good at manifesting. Good at going after what they want. Tough start in life but always get what they want later in life.
- Have a lot of responsibility. Independent person. Difficult asking for & accepting help. Older sibling vibe. Being the forgotten child. Being the child who compromises for their siblings. Attempting to create less burden for your parents.
- Deeply value the opinion of authority (Parents, teachers, etc).
- Tough on themselves. Feel they need to work harder. Feeling the need to earn things. Feeling you haven’t done enough. Feeling you aren’t enough.
- Strong boundaries. You may have high standards and strict “rules” for people in your life especially romantic partners. Will not just accept anybody.
- And one thing I’ve noticed is whether it be saturn trine asc or saturn square asc, these people end up in positions where their partners have to “earn” them. Ex: making yourself difficult to schedule dates with. Making their potential partner prove interest and intent in some kind of way. Partners have to chase you to an extent.
- Also, I’ve seen this as dad disapproving of partner. Partner had to gradually work to bond with the dad. Ex: Helping him at the house, Initiating conversation with him every visit, Telling the dad his future plans and how they involve his daughter, etc. Saturn Asc people’s partners really WORK to prove themselves.
Accuracy heavily influenced by houses and signs.
Mars Aspect Jupiter
- Strong sense of faith. Strong sense of optimism. Strong sense of doing the right thing. Could manifest as being self righteous.
- Jupiter strengthens mars. This creates a strong drive, need for passion and action.
- Ex: Let’s say mars is in scorpio: You will truly never forget people from the past. Strong memory. Grudge holder for sure.
- If in a fire sign, very quick to anger. On the bright side, very funny. Quick thinking. But similar to Scorpio mars, will not forgive easily. An abundance of anger.
- Independent. Ability to lead. Could be a good leader or mentor.
Accuracy heavily influenced houses and sign.
Mercury Aspects Mars
- Fast thinking. This can make them charming. Or opposite effect: Fast speaking. Blurting things out without thinking. Misunderstood.
- They’d make good rappers or a good lawyer. Persuasive. Clever in speech.
- Communication has a strong effect on others. Deeply hurt others.
- Flirty without even trying.
- Might be too clever or too quick for most. Leaving people speechless.
- Fights with siblings. Issues with siblings. May grow to feel bad about how you treated them back in the day. May forever have a rivalry.
- Men may feel competitive with other men. Need to one up others. Competitive person.
- Honest and straightforward. However, if they want to lie, they’re VERY good at it.
- May have scars. Important to check the house you have gemini in. For ex: Lets say you have gemini 2nd house & mercury conjunct mars, you could have scars on the face. Prone to acne.
- Ex.2: Ik a gemini rising with mercury conjunct mars who had plastic surgery done. Mercury rules their body. Mars is “cutting”.
Accuracy heavily influenced by houses and signs.
Sun Aspects Neptune.
- Mysterious. People can’t figure you out 100%. You don’t fit into one specific label or box. Private person especially if you have scorpio placements.
- You don’t try to be a mystery. You are naturally withdrawn. Quiet but not shy person.
- Difficulty expressing oneself. Looking for escape to cope. Driving around aimlessly. Focusing on education and career over personal matters. Or depending on entire chart, substance abuse issues.
- A father who can’t stand up for himself. A father who is taken advantage of by other families members. A father who looks for escape.
Accuracy influenced by house and sign.
Sun Aspects Jupiter.
- Confident person. Many creative outlets. Optimistic outlook.
- Expressive person. Ex: Laughs loud, hand gestures, facial expression, lots of body movement, physically tall or large.
- Father could fit the above description. Father could lecture a lot. Father may be a generally happy person. Father could be a gambler. Father has the tendency to overdo things. Father could either be selfish or very generous.
- Good humour. Usually a kind and easygoing person. Adventurous spirit.
- Can get preachy about their beliefs. Stubborn on their beliefs. Conversations can become one sided - one person talking too much without realizing the others haven’t gotten a chance to speak.
- They want to share knowledge. Help others - humans and animals.
Accuracy influenced by house and signs.
Moon Aspects Venus.
- Feminine & seemingly flirtatious habits. (Twirling/playing with your hair, swaying body movements, etc). It is all naturally not intentionally done. Others, may perceive it as trying to be flirty though.
- Cooperate person. Moms can be very peace loving. Mom who sacrifices in attempt to keep the peace.
- In men, this can result in seeing women through the Madonna whore complex. Men can idealize women - lack of understanding & experience with real women.
- Taking pleasure in nurturing people. Potential to be a good baker & cook.
- Artistic eye. Home design and clothing. However, depending on signs, may prefer comfort over fashion.
- Expensive taste. Potential to overspend and be indulgent. Be cautious of ending up in debt. Sweet tooth.
- You or the mother may have a baby face. Soft and often clear skin. Especially you if your rising is in connection to moon or venus. If in connection to mars, acne & scars likely. But either way, youthful appearance.
- Happier in relationships. Feeling the need to always be in a relationship. However, depending on the signs, can be moody. Inconsistent in what you desire. Inconsistent in likes and dislikes.
Accuracy influenced by entire natal chart.
Sun Aspects Saturn.
- Restricted in self expression. May fear other’s opinions. May fear criticism. Dislike of teasing/roasting. Dislike of comedy in general.
- Being hard on yourself for mistakes. Being fussy about how you look and behave. Self conscious.
- Late bloomers. Become authority figures later in life. Desire respect over all else. Grandparent energy.
- Patient. Good planners. Hardworking.
Accuracy influenced by houses and signs.
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aphrodeiities · 4 months ago
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ɴᴏʀᴛʜ ɴᴏᴅᴇ ᴛʜʀᴏᴜɢʜ ᴛʜᴇ ꜱɪɢɴꜱ ᴀɴᴅ ʜᴏᴜꜱᴇꜱ
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follow for more content!
and this was a prize post for surpassing a following milestone? im not sure but either way thank you for everyone who has helped me gain this much supporters <3
north node is now cheaper when trying to buy asteroids/others through my paid readings :)
i did my research by talking to close friends and researching celebrities! take the degrees with a grain of salt.
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♇ the north node is about your individual path your life takes and inevitably becomes. can mean where you are exposed, what you could fear and even obsess over.
♇ north node in aries/1h [1°/13°/25°] ⟶ becoming a leader, being the face of something, a company, a show etc. being the first to do something, specifically within your family. anger issues, passion for sports or being a champion. excellent at theatre/acting, people might want to expose your life, your goals so they can steal. if not careful can become filled with rage, could have accidents with the head. could have a fear of being pushed aside, not recognised.
celebrities with this north node placement ⟶ mariah carey, emilia clarke and martin luther king.
♇ north node in taurus/2h [2°/14°/26°] ⟶ excellent cooks. to become rich, and obsession with feeling beautiful, could be obsessed with money. very possessive over other people or their own possessions. very vocal people. could get sore throats a lot, can have their privacy exposed/boundaries crossed. great singers, distinct voices, a need to be heard. and could have a lot of people wanting to be them, could have a fear of losing their value, or losing their possessions. classis beauty.
celebrities with this north node placement ⟶ lana del rey, sharon tate and bella hadid.
♇ north node in gemini/3h [3°/15°/27°] ⟶ spokespeople, known to say silly things. like to win arguments, very direct people. other people might ridicule or nitpick everything they say. insecure of not being taken seriously, be careful of car accidents or just bad drivers, being associated with cars. amazing at marketing, people could parade the person a lot.
celebrities with this north node placement ⟶ khloe kardashian, jfk kennedy and billie eilish.
♇ north node in cancer/4h [4°/16°/28°] ⟶ to make a family, a foundation or a legacy and leaving a will. to have a tribe, obsession with sense of belonging. conflict with family. disconnection with family, can also be a try-hard. can com from a popular family.
celebs with this north node placement ⟶ britney spears, prince harry and michelle obama.
♇ north node in leo/5h [5°/17°/29°] ⟶ charismatic, can be obsessed with achievements and goals. famous children. are very goal-oriented, can have a fear of failure, which sometimes causes them to be strict. protective over children, having children with popular/wealthy people and they can be easily admired and glorified. succeed in their talents and hobbies.
celebs with this north node placement ⟶ beyoncé, angelina jolie and kim kardashian.
♇ north node in virgo/6h [6°/18°] ⟶ could have a problem with health, obsession with being perfecting. servicing others, a worker, deep insecurities. copying others. could have a fear of not being perfect, anxious, can be harsh with your words. very erratic as well.
celebs with this north node placement ⟶ kylie jenner, jennifer lopez and kourtney kardashian.
♇ north node in libra/7h [7°/19°] ⟶ could be obsessed with getting into relationships. could have a fear of being disliked. beware of too much cosmetic surgery. inevitable marriage, soul-mate finding. marrying someone famous/wealthy. can be very flaky, needs to find balance. sometimes could find themselves with troubling marriages. fear of ending up alone.
celebs with this north node placement ⟶ madonna, michael jackson and ashanti.
♇ north node in scorpio/8h [8°/20°] ⟶ be careful with cosmetic surgery. obsessive spending, money obsession and sex. fear of losing everything, possessions, money and power along with liberty. destined to be or become rich or leave a legacy. obsessive, easily addicted to drugs and can be vengeful. could be stalkers or are the ones stalked and scrutinised by others.
celebs with this north node placement ⟶ megan thee stallion, paris hilon and jungkook.
♇ north node in sagittarius/9h [9°/21°] ⟶ teachers, students of life and researches. fear of feeling stupid or stuck in life. not believing yourself. can be very conceited, others might like to steal from others. feeling like a God, superiority complex; obsessed with learning. burn-outs or spoiled. can be too lustful; becoming publishers, directors and screen-writers. even Gurus, people looking up to them. trading illegal stuff, talent with bitcon.
celebs with this north node placement ⟶ ariana grande, cardi b and demi lovato.
♇ north node in capricorn/10h [10°/22°] ⟶ unbalance with power, authority issues. public clashes, fear of being forgotten or overlooked. seen as attractive, some can be crazy or pushed to be crazy. ambitious, rich and bold. can mean accidents, fear of being watched, fear of failing. obsessive with reputation and legacy, destined to be known for something, becoming a boss, or another high position.
celebs with this north node placement ⟶ adele, selena gomez and gwyneth paltrow.
♇ north node in aquarius/11h [11°/23°] ⟶ fear of loneliness and losing friends. could be a controlling friend or have friends who are controlling/manipulative. random fame, random wealth. fame from the internet, getting money from the internet. inventing something, creating trends and being a humanitarian. ego-death. accidents. deceptive friends or is the deceptive friends, angry conflicts on the internet, with friends or with people in the same community as them.
celebs with this north node placement ⟶ lady gaga, miranda kerr and the weeknd.
♇ north node in pisces/12h [12°/24°] ⟶ falling into delusions. obsessive and intrusive thoughts, can become famous, but fame will be very damaging fo the mental health. addictions, specifically with alcohol. nightmares. making sacrifices, people having ill-intent, doing witch-craft on you or you could be someone who practices it. can mean moving far from home place, nasty hidden enemies, having your dreams come true.
celebs with this north node placement ⟶ rihanna, justin bieber and marilyn monroe.
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dollypopup · 6 months ago
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"Colin had no trauma related to love and self worth like Anthony. Anthony watched his father die, watched his mum turn into a ghost of a person, and didn't want that for his wife"
Bestie. . .they have. . .the same dad???? They have the same mum???? Literally all of the Bridgerton children except Hyacinth watched Edmund die? They all experienced Violet's immense sorrow? He and Violet obviously have a very close connection and so of course he saw her wilting (plant pun, if you were wondering) or at least knew about it and has responded with being particularly gentle with her?
Trauma shaped all the Bridgertons. Colin was a young boy when his dad passed and everyone in the family experienced an immense grief and, unlike his brothers, Colin was twelve, he wasn't the heir, he wasn't the spare, and had no responsibility but to go to school (sent off elsewhere after his dad passed away, thus disconnected from his circle of support and family) and figure out how to be a man from strangers and rakes. Literally no one had space for his grief and sensitivity? He even cries alone in his bedroom in Season 1 and stops talking about his travels after he gets made fun of in Season 2 and claims that hardly anyone replied to his letters in Season 3 like what do you mean he has no trauma related to love?
Colin was right there on the steps watching his father cradled in his mother's arms as she wept over his sudden passing. Of course he has trauma related to love? Colin's entire arc was about how he only felt he could be cared about if he was pleasing the people around him or being useful in some way and putting on a mask and a persona so he wouldn't be hurt by how much no one else wanted the real, messy, authentic him around? His mum and dad lived a love story and Colin watched it fall to pieces just as all the Bridgertons did, he just internalized it differently. His entire family was grieving so he decided to be useful by offering levity where he could, especially as the brother raised predominately with his sisters, Eloise and Daphne.
And yet despite the fact that this was such a huge tragedy of his childhood, Colin still is incredibly emotionally available and as soon as he realized what he felt for Penelope was romantic, he takes initiative and he cuts into her dance with Debling and he chases after her carriage so he can confess that he can't stop thinking about her and he's not at all angry at her, she doesn't vex him, it isn't frustration at her- it's torture because he is so damn besotted with her that he dreams of her and the kiss they shared haunts him but it's torture he embraces because he's a romantic soul who is incredibly emotionally brave and he cares about Penelope more than he cares about his ego or image or past hurts.
Give my man his flowers.
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8hsaturn · 1 month ago
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astro observations #4
- The idea that your north node = fate and destined path doesn’t feel accurate. After all, north node aka rahu is literally illusion and material obsessions and is also considered a malefic in multiple astrological circles. I find it to be more of an indicator of what our fantasies and guilty pleasures may be.
- People with prominent Leo/Aquarius axis tend to focus their astrological study on their personal placements from what I noticed. As they get deeper however, they start to venture into what other placements might be like. But for most part, the focus tends to be on their placements first.
- 7th/8th house placements tend to be the opposite, being very curious to know why people around them, their role models, and others in general act the way they do and therefore using astrology to understand that
- 9th house placements are the ones who study every placement just for the sake of it or out of curiosity, some 3h placements might also
- Taurus + Leo = curly hair
- Taurus placements, especially if aspecting Lilith or mars or coupled with mars ruled placements, tend to be into vampires bc throat (Taurus) and blood and injury (Mars) as well as the seductive/taboo nature of vampires (Lilith)
- 3h Saturn/ 3h in Capricorn might take quite a while to get their drivers license
- What others tend to say about u : 3h from 7h : aka the 9h.
e.g. 9h in Aquarius : people talk about how you’re unique, popular or friends with a lot of people, humanitarian. They might also discuss how you’re eccentric, disconnected or apathetic.
- Whatever houses are ruled by Venus in your chart can give you an idea of how your relationships impact you as well as how you behave when in a relationship.
e.g. Libra risings have Venus ruling their first and eighth house, they tend to have very transformative relationships that end up changing them completely. They might also benefit from personal glow-ups during certain relationships thanks to their partner’s resources. Opposite can be true with weak Venus or malefic influence on the houses of Venus.
- 8h is underrated as an intelligence indicator. That’s the house of research, uncovering mysteries, and finding out the hidden. If one of the most common intelligent tropes -detectives and mad scientists- work within 8h themes, that is for a reason
- 6th house Lilith could indicate suffering from eating disorders.
- I noticed that even people who don’t know anything about astrology (sometimes especially them lol) tend to have markers of their signs all over their online presence. my ardra stellium bf has pearl as his username (ardra is symbolized by the diamonds and jewelry), a lot of shatabisha (especially the men) like wearing bracelets and rings (reminiscent of the empty circle that symbolizes shatabisha) etc.
- 10th house could signify what traits do you have that are different or stand out from ur family. For example, Jupiter in the tenth house could mean different beliefs, maybe a taller build compared to your parents, I also see it as which members of your family do you resemble the most. 10th house Jupiter might look like their grandparents while 10th house sun their dad, and moon their mom etc.
- Saturnian tend to be gatekeepers because Saturn = scarcity and limitations.
- 4h mars/sun could indicate having more close male friends n vice versa for 4h Venus/moon.
- Sun nakshatras and ashwinis look really good when the sun is shining on them. They might be particularly fond of golden hour selfies.
- 11h synastry can indicate starting a business together, whether it’s benefics or malefics will indicate if the business will succeed or not.
- Lacking aspects to the luminaries can mean feeling disconnected from your parents, as if there’s a certain distance between you and them that can’t be bridged. An empty 3h + unaspected 3h lord can also indicate feeling that way towards your siblings.
- A strong Mars + Venus = good dancer. Also prominent dhanista and snake yoni Nakshatras (Rohini, mrigashira).
- Anna Popplewell and Nancy ajram look similar and I found they have quite the similar placements besides both having nodal (Ardra/Mula) and Saturnian (Uttara Bhadra/Anuradha) influence.
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Nancy Ajram (Top) : Jupiter in Anuradha, Sun DK in the first Degree, Sun and Mars in Krittika, Ketu in Mula.
Anna Popplewell (Bottom): Venus in Anuradha, Sun DK in the first degree, Jupiter in Krittika, Sun, Mercury, and Saturn in Mula.
this is it for today <3 please don’t hesitate to share if any of this resonates!
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cutielando · 3 months ago
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i worry | lando norris
synopsis: in which you’re both worried about him
a/n: based on this request!
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Ever since he could remember, Lando has always been a vocal advocate of how important mental health was to him, always encouraging people to get the help they need and not feel at all embarrassed about needing it and asking in the first place.
It was one of the many things that you loved about him, how passionate he was about making sure his words would encourage people all around to get better.
But that also meant that he sometimes forgot to take care of himself. The last couple of races before the 2024 summer break were very tough on Lando, both physically and mentally, but they especially took a toll on his mental health.
You had seen it ever since Silverstone, after McLaren had clearly fucked his strategy and jeopardized yet another chance at a win, he was heartbroken. Hungary was especially hard for you to watch, especially because you were in the garage when everything went down.
For days after, you couldn’t get the radios out of your head, the way the team had spoken to Lando, basically emotionally blackmailed him into giving up his position to Oscar. Lando’s broken expression when he finally made his way back from the trophy ceremony; his eyes searching for you in the crowd of personnel he couldn’t bear to see at that moment.
It was a very hard pill to swallow, especially in the days following the race, once everything had really settled down into his mind, once he had time to talk it through with the team as well. He never should have been put in that position, and the team knew they fucked up, but that still didn’t help how your boyfriend was feeling.
Let down by the people in whose hands he puts his life in every race weekend, by the people he trusts with his life and who have helped him make all of his dreams come true. He was let down by the people he considered a second family. And he didn’t know how to feel about that.
With the summer break, you figured that he would finally disconnect from everything, find himself again and recharge his batteries for the remainder of the season. 
But then came the videos from Grill the Grid.
You always watched the videos, finding comfort and laughing wholeheartedly at the competitiveness all the drivers displayed in such meaningless little games, it was heartwarming for everybody watching.
However, this time, that wasn’t the case.
From the very beginning of the first video, you had noticed something was off with Lando, in every single segment that he was in. He was quiet, he didn’t have the energy he always showed when doing the challenges. He seemed like it was the last place where he wanted to be, he was doing something he would rather not even hear about. At least, that’s what his demeanor showed.
Seeing the way Lando was through the entire video, it only added to your worries. 
You had just touched down in Greece with a couple of your friends, and you were laying on the soft bed of your hotel room while Lando was taking a shower. He hadn’t heard what you were watching, he probably would have stopped you from even clicking on the video. He didn’t want you to see him like that, he didn’t want to make you worry even more than you already were.
Pausing the video and putting your phone on the bed next to you, you sat there, chewing your bottom lip while thinking things over in your head. Should you ask him about it? Should you just ignore it? 
No, you had to check up on him. You knew him better than anyone, and you knew he tended to bury his feelings deep down and just shut everyone out whenever he was feeling down. And sadly, you feared that was happening right before your eyes, and you hadn’t noticed until then.
You hadn’t been waiting on the bed for long before the bathroom door opened and Lando walked out, a towel hanging low on his hips and water dripping from his freshly-washed curls. 
“Hey” he said, glancing your way briefly before he made his way to your shared walk-in closet to find some underwear and clothes to sleep in.
You smiled at him, your eyes following his every move. You went back to chewing your lip, your mind overwhelmed with dozens of thoughts attacking you at high speeds. You were itching to just blurt it out, make him sit down and talk to you about whatever it was that was bothering him.
But you knew you couldn’t do that. He would never open up if it felt like you were pressuring him into doing so. You were aware of that, but you also knew that he desperately needed to talk to someone, and you preferred that someone be you.
“Hey babe?” you called out, waiting for a hum in reply before you continued. “Do you think we could have a little talk?” you called out, your eyes stuck on your fingers while you waited for a response.
There was silence for a couple of minutes before Lando emerged back into the bedroom, now freshly dressed in a pair of boxers and a white T-shirt. His eyebrows were furrowed, worry settling into the pit of his stomach.
“Is something wrong?” he asked worriedly, taking a seat next to you on the bed and resting his hand on your knee.
You sat up and crossed your legs, shuffling closer to him and taking his hand in yours.
Looking up at him and admiring his beautiful eyes, you noticed the turmoil going around behind his irises, making you smile sadly at the poor boy in front of you.
“You know they posted the first Grill the Grid video today, right?” he nodded, still looking at you eagerly. “Well, I was watching it, because you know I like the little challenges they make you all do. And I couldn’t help but notice a few things about it” you carefully worded your ideas, trying not to seem like you were attacking him in any way.
“What do you mean? What things?” he asked, the worry in his stomach growing stronger and stronger.
You sighed, looking down at your joined hands on your lap. 
“Baby, are you okay?” you asked, looking back up at him with worried eyes.
His heart dropped into the pit of his stomach, his heart suddenly beating out of his chest. He was okay, right? He had to be okay, he didn’t have time to be anything but okay.
“I’m fine, why are you asking? Babe, what’s going on?” he said, shrugging his shoulders.
“I’m worried about you, Lando. The person I saw in that video is not you, baby. You didn’t smile once during the video and I know how much you love filming Grill the Grid. It looked like you didn’t even want to be there, baby” you explained, shuffling closer to him until your knees were touching.
Lando had since looked away from you, his gaze stuck on the fuzzy carpet at the foot of the bed. 
He knew you were bound to notice he wasn't himself. As much as he had tried to hide it and pretend like nothing was wrong, he knew he couldn’t hide from you for much longer.
Truth is, he was tired. Tired of always pretending everything was okay, tired lt making it seem like he was positive and trusting in his team, a team which had let him down in the last weeks more than anybody else in his entire life.
He couldn’t pretend anymore, he didn’t want to pretend that he was okay when everything inside of him was screaming for help.
“Yeah, I’m worried about me too. I was hoping I’d get better before you noticed” he mumbled, chuckling sadly as he took your hand in his and started playing with your bracelets.
Your eyes widened, worry sinking even deeper into the pit of your stomach. You had so desperately wanted him to tell you what he was feeling, that everything you had thought you had seen was in your head, but he did the exact opposite. He had confirmed every painful suspicion you had had, and you didn’t know how you were supposed to feel about it.
“Talk to me, baby. What’s going on?” you urged him, resting your head on his shoulder.
He sighed, biting his lip. He really thought he would have had more time to prepare for the conversation, but he might as well just tell you everything now. It would make it easier on him.
Looking up at you, he turned around so he was facing you, making you sit up straight and look at him worriedly.
“Truth to be told, I haven’t been doing all that well these past couple of weeks, and it’s got nothing to do with you or our relationship” he said, putting some of your concerns to rest. “Ever since Miami, everything’s been feeling half-done, or thrown away in a way. Max took me out in Russia, the team fucked up my strategy at Silverstone, they made me give up my win in Hungary, they fucked everything up in Belgium. I just don’t understand why they’re behaving like this” he confessed, making your heart break a little.
It was extremely disappointing for you to see how let down Lando felt by his team, a team that he considered to be his second family. He had dedicated his entire Formula 1 career to make sure McLaren would become great again, and now that it was finally happening, he and Oscar were taking the brunt of it, and he wasn’t okay with that.
“Oh, baby. I’m so sorry you feel this way. I know how tough things can be, and I wish you'd told me sooner. I hate knowing how much you were hurting and I wasn’t there to comfort you” you said, wrapping an arm around his shoulders and bringing him into a side hug.
“I didn’t realize how much it was bothering me until the summer break began, you know. I finally had some free time to think about everything, and I don’t like the conclusions I’ve drawn” he said, his voice muffled by the fabric of your shirt.
“And what are those, baby?” you urged him on, knowing he needed to get everything off his chest before he truly felt relieved.
He sighed, changing his position so he was now laying down on the bed with his head in your lap, your fingers almost immediately latching onto his curls.
“I’ve given them my entire career, I’ve stuck with them for such a long time and I signed an extension for even more years, and yet they seem to forget about all of that. Even when everyone was telling me to look elsewhere, when I got offers from Red Bull, I never even thought about leaving the team. I just sometimes wish they would show me the gratitude and respect I think I deserve after sticking with them for so long” he explained, shutting his eyes as he enjoyed the feeling of your hands playing with his hair.
You bit your lower lip, nodding softly as you stared off into the distance. 
“I understand how you feel, and I wish there was more that I could do to help you. But I think you just need to disconnect from everything during this break, like not even think about racing at all for the entire month. You need a break, spend some time with me and your family, enjoy just living your life for a little and then you get back with a fresh mind” you suggested, your other hand cupping his cheek.
He hummed, but eventually nodded.
“You’re right. I just want to spend some time alone with you, I haven’t been able to just enjoy having you with me these past couple of weeks and I need to make it up to you” he said, opening his eyes and giving you a little smile.
You smiled back at him, leaning down and pressing your lips against his.
And even though you knew you and Lando still had a long way to go until he would finally feel content, you were determined to get through this.
Together.
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rottmnt-residuum · 2 months ago
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Hi, I've read the Residuum comic, and I think the characterization of the boys is really good. I was wondering if you have any tips on how to write them? Especially Mikey, please.
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I'd actually recommend re-watching the show with one character in mind. All my notes on the turtles come from doing separate re-watches for each of them. The key is to ONLY watch the character you are focusing on.
In the end, you'll probably be happier with your own personal interpretation. As we are with ours lol
TL;DR
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Massive post under the cut
To preface: we'll be contrasting (this Mikey) against the fandoms version of Mikey, as our interpretation is very different. Don't worry if you prefer the fandom version, there's nothing… wrong per se with writing him this way. We just find him flat and uninteresting. (Main author: not me, I just hate him, lol).
Every reader or fan comes into a story with their own biases and experiences. A ton of our view of Mikey is based on how our siblings acted. We see Mikey as the young sibling that got preferential treatment from the whole family, simply due to being the youngest, but is now aging out of the privilege. Which all youngest siblings do at some point or another.
The fandoms version of Mikey is empathetic, naive, vulnerable, co-dependent and quite often a door mat who cries at the drop of a hat. And as much as the fandom like to say that people love him… when this particular character archetype is in other media, they seem to attract the most criticism. Mable pines, Bolin from Korra, people rag on Aang all the fucking time, and Steven Universe is a whole other bag. These characters don't deserve it, and yet it happens anyway.
To flatten Mikey to simply 'the baby' is a disservice. We don't see or write Mikey as the fandom “baby” version (cinnamon roll uwu). Part of this comes from having multiple siblings, so we interpret the times when Mikey does the puppy dog eyes as typical younger sibling bullshit, mostly by the way that the other turtles rarely react to it, if at all.
The other turtles traits can also get projected onto Mikey. Mikey being the fandom therapist is in the same category as this. He isn't a therapist, he's a psychology nerd who likes to psychoanalyze people and meddle in their relationships. (Donnie and Shelldons relationship, Splinter and Draxums...) he's not trying to resolve your emotional issues. Of the turtles, the character that cares the most about people's feelings is Raph. And Leo is more of a consoler than Mikey ever is. It flattens all the turtle's characterizations when you start doing this because you are ripping out parts that are integral to another characters' complexity.
Co-author has told me that they've seen people become confused when going into the show after only reading fan fiction or coming from the movie. They see his characterization as inconsistent and become upset when their view of him is contradicted. This also happens when a fandomized version of him becomes the primary characterization that they use. Sometimes when this disconnect happens (or if they just don't like the character), Mikey characterization is swung in the complete opposite direction.
They make him manipulative and abusive, or someone who is hyper violent and avoids being held accountable for anything. This is an uncharitable interpretation of him and can come off as pretty racist depending on the circumstances. (like if someone considers the turtles black or not)
Every version of Mikey is a shithead (affectionate), even this one. Especially this one, really. When Mikey not doing the "baby schtick" hes mean. If you pay attention to what he's saying, and just not his tone of voice, he's consistently saying pretty mean or condescending stuff. (You could take this as simply naïveté, but he still says mean shit pretty often regardless)
The times he does say genuinely nice stuff the turtles don't exactly expect it from him, at least, in the early season. And while he is mean, and seems to find saying mean things to be funny, Mikey isn't cruel. Nor will he ever be.
This shit-headery behavior is found in both 2003 and 18 Mikey. They have a degree of social intelligence that lets them use it to annoy people into doing what they want. 18 just has the advantage of being baby faced and having better tonal control. He's good at using people's perception of him to get what he wants.
Let Mikey have his problematic traits, but don't overexaggerate them. He doesn't revel in fooling people. He loves doing character bits, and the baby faced one just happens to be one of them. However, to infantilize or to deem him incompetent is to piss him off, he wants to be viewed as a competent part of the team and competent as an individual. He's not insecure about being young, he just doesn't want to be treated like he can't do anything.
Mikey above all is an optimistic character, he sees the brighter side quite often and is conscious of the harm his actions have on people. Mostly after the fact, but he consistently attempts to rectify the harm he has personally done to peoples lives. (Todd, Bullhop, Draxum). Food and shelter seems to be a thing that he considers to be a right. He doesn't cross a boundary twice once he learns of it, and he never pushes people too far (if he likes you, that is. if he doesn't know you or doesn't like you, he doesn't give a singular shit. But that is standard to most people.). He doesn't care about people's stuff, though. He breaks things all the time.
Mikey understands boundaries, but he doesn't automatically recognize them. He needs them to verbalized or for there to be a very obvious reaction to the boundary being crossed (unfortunately, for Todd and Donnie). Sometimes people mess up (esp. younger people), and it can take a while for teens to learn where boundary is, but he fully respects the boundaries he does know about. He doesn't act petulant when he's told about boundary, he apologizes, accepts it, and moves on. He doesn't dwell.
Mikey doesn't hold on to distressing emotions. He bounces between emotions quickly, but isn't effected in the long run. One thing Iv'e seen people often conflate is the difference between sensitive and vulnerable. Mikey is sensitive, but I have never seen him vulnerable to others. To be sensitive is to be easily influenced by the current situation. To be vulnerable is to hold that influence for a long time. Characters can have one, both, or neither of these traits. But Mikey is not vulnerable. It is the difference between compressing memory foam and a piece of metal until they deform. One will pop back, the other does not.
Those who are vulnerable but not sensitive will take longer to effect, but once you do, they will hold on to that emotion for a very long time. The vulnerable, are grudge holders. (leo). But like I've said, Mikey bounces back. What a character does has an effect on his emotions, but it doesn't make a lasting impression.
Forgiveness is another thing people like to push on him. It is not that Mikey forgives people easily, it's just that he doesn't hold grudges. He neither forgives nor forgets, but he does not ruminate. He's generally affable, first impressions seem to be a big part of how he views people. He is idealistic, and doesn't assume people are unchanging and/or evil, but he's not a mark.
Mikey isn't so much as naive or overly trusting… it's just that he's inexperienced. He doesn't get fooled by anyone in the series except meat sweats, and that's because Meatsweats is on Todd drugs. Mikey just didn't notice when he started faking. He's not… actually all that aware of people's emotional states, passively. He has to tune in to notice things like that.
Mikey isn't someone who really tries to regulate others emotions, either. The fandom like to make Mikey afraid of his brothers fighting and others being upset, but Mikey doesn't actually care. The most distressed we ever see him in a fight is in the movie, and he's not SCARED, he's just concerned (and then alarmed once it turned physical). If anything, outside extenuating circumstances (like the movie), Mikey actually seems to find their fights annoying.
(Mikey actually seems to have a pretty short fuse, but his bounciness doesn't really let it linger very long, lmao)
(One pet peeve of fandom Mikey is the constant crying, crying at fights, crying at insults, crying for no reason all the time. Sure, he tears up when he gets emotional, but when Mikey is genuinely crying It's when he's desperate, like when he's hungry, or when he's trying to save Leo from certain doom. Same thing, really.)
Mikey respects no one (we love him for this). He admires people, he admires his family: April, the turtles, his dad, Lou Jitsu. He admires Rupert Swaggert, but he respects none of them. No one is sacrosanct to the Mikey.
Above all, the way we write characters is to give them a past that informs how they act now. We view Mikey and the other turtles as teenagers that were kids, and that will be adults. Yes they all have “problematic” traits, but 1) good characters need flaws, and controversial traits are one of the best to use, and 2) they're teenagers, don't expect adult behaviors from them, also don't expect them to be kids. They're minors, not toddlers.
This is getting as long enough as it is, so we'll stop here, but this is a very broad overview of how we characterize him. There's a lot we didn't cover here, but if we even started on hobbies, or the real minutia of his quirks and ticks, or even how he feels about other specific characters... we'd be here all day. So I hope this is good enough lol
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If there was something you wanted to know in particular, you'll need to get specific. Feel free to ask again ahahh
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totally-here · 2 months ago
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Post Gotham war Jason and post GIW Danny scrap
Jason is laying on the ground. He can hear water running to his right and can see his parachute tangled in trees overhead. 
The explosion must have sent him farther away than he hoped. His back hurts from the landing after he disconnected from the parachute. His hands are still shaking from residual adrenaline that in turn makes his throat constrict in fear. 
Fucking Bruce. Of all the things he could’ve done to break their cycle. 
Because that’s what it was, wasn’t it? A never ending cycle of them fighting over morality, making up, then fighting again without any real progress being made. The Joker’s still kicking in one way or another, and Jason still doesn’t talk with his family much outside of vigilante activities. 
And now he won’t even be able to go out as Red Hood, because his own fucking adrenaline will immobilise him with fear. 
Jason never should have tried to work with Selina. He’s self-aware enough to admit that. It was stupid, trying to mess up her operation from the inside after realizing just what she was setting up the goon workforce for, even if it wasn’t her intention. She was only letting him work with her to shove it into Bruce’s face, anyway. 
Because that’s all Jason will ever be to them. Batman’s biggest mistake. A Robin turned corpse turned mass murderer. Like he hasn’t been actively not killing people for at least a year now. Hasn’t shot a gun in months. 
And yet here Jason is, trying to tell if his ribs are broken without moving. His ears are ringing faintly from the collision with the meteor and then the explosion at the observatory. 
He ditched his comm to Oracle and the rest of the bats earlier, and the batwing is one with the wreckage now. But there are cameras everywhere in Gotham. They would see he got out, and probably send someone to pick him up. Maybe. 
Jason doesn’t know if he can stomach looking at his family right now. Not when he can still feel the effects of whatever Bruce stuck in him in the back of his throat, in the back of his mind. It’s like he’s been flayed out, all his scars and weaknesses on display. 
“Hey man, you okay?” A man steps into Jason’s vision. Around his age, if not younger. His eyes that verge on the edge of uncannily blue have deep eye bags, like he hasn’t slept in weeks. He looks at Jason like one would a particularly uninteresting bug. Jason shivers.
It takes a few tries for Jason not to swallow his words. As it is, he still slurs on the swear. “Just fucking peachy.” 
The guy raises an eyebrow, looking very doubtful. He looks Jason up and down, then sighs. He rights himself from leaning over and runs a hand through his long black hair with white streaks in it. It’s choppily cut, and not in a tasteful way. It’s like a five year old found scissors for the first time. It’s annoying how it actually works for the guy. 
“I have a first aid kit in my truck, wait here,” He orders, then walks off to the left. Jason turns his head to watch him. There is a small white truck parked to the side of a road that no cars are passing through. The guy opens the back door and digs around, then emerges with a white box. 
He kneels on the grass next to Jason and slowly reaches out to help him sit up, narrating as he does. “I’m gonna lean you against the tree so that I can get a better angle for your forehead.” He does that, and Jason realizes that yeah, his forehead is bleeding. Maybe he snagged it on a branch on the way down, or maybe it was debris. “I’m going to disinfect it, brace for the sting, I guess.” 
It does sting, but Jason doesn’t flinch away. It’s not the exhaustion from the back to back panic attacks that’s calming him. He knows what that exhaustion should feel like, this is not it. As the guy gently washes off the blood from Jason’s forehead with wipes and presses bandaids onto it, he feels like he’s being enveloped in a warm hug. 
“Why do I feel safe with you?” It stumbles out before he can stop it. The guy doesn’t stop inspecting Jason’s arms for cuts to answer. Only when he finds traces of burns to wrap against infection does he say anything. Jason’s too warm for a November night. 
“Well. There are two options. Either you’re concussed, or you’ve died before.” Jason takes in a sharp breath, but the guy doesn’t seem to notice. “Oh, three, I guess. Since it could be both.”
“I don’t feel concussed," Jason says. And he doesn’t. Maybe slightly dehydrated, but his head doesn’t hurt and he’s not nauseous at all. The slight slurring is just because he’s tired, probably. 
The guy hums, leaning back to check his handiwork. There’s bandaids on Jason’s forehead and bandages along his arms. He closes the first-aid kit with a snap and stands to his full height. His face is haloed by the full moon behind him. His eyes reflect in the light. “Guess it’s option two, then. I was leaning towards that, anyway. Once Deads tend to have that effect on me, and you do give off Realms Touched vibes.”
The guy offers a hand, and Jason stares at it for a moment before taking it. It’s like touching an ice cube. “I don’t know what that means.”
The guy pulls him up easily, despite being built like a broad-shouldered twig and at least five inches shorter than Jason. Probably a meta, then. Or maybe magic. The guy lets go of Jason’s hand to run a hand through his hair again. The motion brings attention to the layer of scar tissue around his left eye. Likely scarred over in the past month or so. 
“Yeah, my bad. Should’ve assumed. Um, short version: I have what amounts to a biological need to help peop-” He stops, purses his lips, then starts again. “To help the undead. And that stretches over to you, I guess.”
“And the Realms Touched thing?”
He shrugs, not looking at Jason’s eyes, but up at his hair. At the white streak sticking out against the black. “Let me guess, you had an encounter with some green not-quite-liquid stuff sometime after you died?” Jason nods once, slowly. “Yeah, that’d do it. The green stuff’s from the Infinite Realms, and doing stuff with it kinda marks you for people with an eye for it.”
“People like you?” Jason narrows his eyes, but it really does seem like this guy is telling the truth. That this is just some weird coincidence that the spooky guy (who cannot be local. Jason might have ditched the mask, vest, and gloves, but he still has his padded shirt with his symbol on it. No true Gothamite would dare to approach the Red Hood with medical supplies) just happened to stumble upon Jason. The complete blasé attitude he has toward the pits helps. A League devotee would be more reverent. 
The guy tilts his head to the side, his face scrunching. “Technically, yeah. I meant more, like, formal magic users. I’m… different?”
“What are you, then?” 
“It’s complicated?” As Jason’s unimpressed look, he tries again. “I’m, I’m kinda like a protector spirit and a psychopomp rolled into one? But, a psychopomp that’s not good at their job.”
Jason gets the feeling that that’s the best explanation he’s going to get out of this guy. He’s already shifting away, looking past the trees and at what’s probably Gotham proper.
“So I have a sense for dead things. ‘S actually why I ended up coming through here. Something that felt like a meal was coming here, but now it’s faded.” He points past Jason, and he follows his finger, moving to face the green smoke rising from the observatory, glowing in the night sky. “You know what happened?”
“Big fuckin’ meteor,” Jason mutters. The smoke is dispersing slowly but surely. A news helicopter is already buzzing around the observatory site. 
“Sure, why not?” The guy mutters back. His eyes flick to Jason before jutting a thumb backwards. “Welp, I’m gonna get back on the road. You need me to call someone for you or something?”
Jason thinks about it. He could call someone to pick him up, or check in with Rose. But. That would mean eventually going back into Gotham. Back into the fire. Back into a city that’s being overrun with thieves he had helped support. It’s not shame that stops him, but fear. 
Fear that if he goes back, it will just start the cycle again. That it’ll just take another form, but he’s just going to be stuck fighting. He’s always fighting, has always been fighting. If he goes back and he starts fighting again, it will never stop. Fear lodges into the back of his throat once again and Jason realizes that he might not be able to fight like that anymore. 
And standing outside of Gotham, seeing the smoke coming out of it color the same as the Pits that still haunt him, Jason thinks that maybe fear and fighting are all he has left. 
He wonders what would happen if he let himself lose those, too. 
“Actually, which way are you going?” Jason asks the guy, who squints at him.
“North.” 
“Sounds good.” Jason spins around and walks determinedly towards the guy’s truck. The guy stutters and hurries to catch up to him.
“Wait, what? You’re just gonna… come with me? Are you sure you’re not concussed?” He says, but stops at the driver’s side door and just watches as Jason slides into the passenger seat. 
Jason smiles at him, all teeth. “Come on, Charon. Aren’t psychopomps supposed to lead the dead to their next destination?”
The guy just looks at him for a moment, then opens the driver’s side and slides in. He glares at Jason, but it doesn’t feel like there’s any real dissatisfaction behind it. “You’re not dead now, and I told you I’m bad at my job.”
Jason shrugs and swings his feet onto the dashboard, ignoring the guy’s disgruntled and insulted look. “Then you’ll get some on the job training.”
“I’m on the run from the government. This isn’t going to be a fun adventure, dude.” 
That does make Jason pause. But he also knows the government. “What’d you do?”
He scoffs. “Exist. Fuckers think they’re entitled to my organs. For science, they said.”
A victim, it sounds like. Hell, maybe even a clone. Not likely to be a criminal. Jason shrugs and shimmies more into the seat, making a show of getting more comfortable. The guy frowns, then closes his door. 
“You know what? Fine, guess I’m doing this now. But we gotta set some ground rules for this roadtrip, okay?” He points at Jason with his left hand, leaning over a little in what could have been intimidating if he didn’t look dead on his feet. Jason recognised the faint lichtenberg scarring on his finger. Recently electrocuted, and badly. “First, get your dirty ass boots off of the dash.” Jason obliges. “Thank you. Second, seatbelts stay on. I know how I drive, and it is not good.”
He emphasizes his point by buckling himself in and glaring at Jason until he does the same. 
“Third, um, I don’t have a third one.” He drums his fingers on the steering wheel. “Oh, tell me a name I can call you. Yeah, that’s the third.”
“Jason. What’s yours?” He should have hesitated. All bat protocol for getting into unmasked situations with a stranger determines giving a fake name, and to not even think about anything close to real. But he doesn’t. It doesn’t matter. This guy clearly doesn’t know who Red Hood is, if he doesn’t recognise the symbol, so Jason doubts he’d recognise the first name of Bruce Wayne’s dead son, and then connect the dots. 
“Danny.” Danny starts the truck and pulls back onto the empty road. It must be two or three in the morning at this point. Maybe later. “Hope you have an enhanced ID, ‘cause we’re going to Canada.”
Jason, in fact, does. Not one that has his name on it, and it’s for New York, but the picture looks similar enough.
~~
So the original idea for this was they head to a cabin aunt alicia has in canada, but I got like 2000 words into this then realized i didn't have the motivation to continue, plus i wasn't confident about the characterization (i'll admit i read the gotham war event in a vacuum) so i just scrapped it. But!! I figure i would post it here in case someone else wants to take the idea and run with it :P
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canirove · 5 months ago
Text
The invinsible princess | Chapter 1
"Champions of Europe"
Index | Chapter 2
Masterlist
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“C’mom, go talk to her. Look at how miserable she looks.”
“Why don't you go talk to her?”
“Because she doesn't fancy me, Gavi” Ferran smirks.
“That's something the press made out.”
“Or not” Ferran shrugs. 
“If you don't go talk to her, I will.”
“Fermín, don't you have a girlfriend?” Gavi says.
“Yeah. And?”
“You can't go talk to the princess. That's cheating.”
“It's just talking, Gavi. Relax” he chuckles.
“Unless the press sees you and then boom! Fermín the Prince” Ferran laughs. 
“Fermín I of Spain. Sounds cool, I like it. What do you think, Pedri? Pedri?” he says, looking around for his teammate.
“Where is he going?” Ferran asks.
“He’s… Oh my God, he's walking towards the princess!” Gavi gasps.
“There he goes. Pedro I of Spain” Fermín chuckles
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“And then it all had been a mistake!”
“That is so funny” my dad laughs. “Isn't it, Sofía?”
“So funny” I say with my best fake smile. 
Why am I stuck with a bunch of old men? This is a party to celebrate that Spain just won the Euros. I should be out there mingling with the young people, talking with the players and their families, getting to know them all a bit and properly congratulate them. But no. I'm stuck with a man telling us about his latest golfing trip to Scotland. 
“Something similar happened to me last time we went to Mallorca” my dad says, making me already disconnect from the conversation. I know which anecdote he is about to share. I probably already know it by heart just from hearing him telling about it to everyone he's met lately. So instead of listening to him, I start looking around.
There are some players dancing with their partners, others playing with their kids (which is the cutest thing ever), others are just chilling… And then, there is someone wearing red and a medal around his neck walking towards me. Or trying to. 
“Right, Sofía?” my dad says again.
“Yeah, yeah” I nod. 
One of the good things about him having told this anecdote so many times is that, by now, I also know when he asks for my support and how I have to react to it, what I have to say. Which comes very handy when your eyes are stuck on the guy smiling and standing in front of you, and who is currently moving his head to one side to make you follow him somewhere. 
“Dad, do you mind if I go get myself a refill?” I ask him.
“Yes, sure. But just beer.”
“Just beer, I promise” I smile before finally leaving the group of men and following Pedri. 
Oh, yes. Because the guy who had been smiling at me and asking me to follow him, was freaking Pedri González. 
“Ma’am” my bodyguard says behind me. “Are you going somewhere?”
Shit. Fuck. I had forgotten about him.
“I'm just going out to get some fresh air. I'm feeling a bit dizzy” I say with a nervous laugh.
“Alone?” he says, looking at the glass door that leads outside the room, Pedri waiting on the other side.
“I… Ummm… It'll be just five minutes.”
“Ma'am…”
“Five minutes, Carlos. It's not like he can kidnap me or something with his leg like that” I chuckle. 
“He cannot, no. But what about others? You are Spain's Princess.”
“But not the heir. No one cares about me.”
“Don't say that, ma'am.”
“It's the truth” I shrug. “Anyway, can I go outside for five minutes? Please? He may just want a photo for his mum.”
“Ok, fine” Carlos sighs. “But don't leave the building.”
“I won't, I promise” I smile before basically running towards the door. He may still regret letting me go.
Once outside, it takes me a moment to find Pedri. When I spot him, he is resting against one of the huge windows, checking the brace he has to wear on his knee. 
“Is it too uncomfortable?” I ask him as I walk towards him.
“Uh?” he says, looking up. And maybe, just maybe… I gasped when the lights from outside illuminated his face in all the right places.
“The brace. Is it uncomfortable?”
“A bit, yeah” he smiles. 
“I'm sorry about what happened.”
“Thank you” Pedri smiles again. “Though everything worked out in the end” he says, touching his medal. “Do you want to try it?”
“Oh, I, ummm…”
“Here” he says, taking it off before walking towards me and putting it around my neck, carefully untucking my hair so it doesn't get tangled with the strap. “Perfect. How does it feel?”
“Heavier than I expected” I chuckle.
“It can't be heavier than a crown” he laughs.
“I don't know. I've never tried on one.”
“Wait, really?”
“Yeah. It's not like I'm gonna be the one who is gonna have to wear it. That's my sister, the heir.”
“But you still are a princess, aren't you? Don't all princesses wear crowns?”
“Nope. I may get to wear a tiara one day if I'm invited to a big event like a royal wedding or a reception for someone important, but other than that…”
“I'm sorry.”
“Oh, don't be. Sometimes being the second born that everyone forgets about actually comes with its perks. Like being here today, for example.”
“I thought it was because you liked football.”
“That too” I chuckle.
“And football players?” Pedri asks me. “Do you also like them?”
“What?”
“My friends were talking about you fancying Gavi.”
“That's my sister, not me.”
“Ha! I knew it! I knew it was her and not you. But they were so convinced they didn't want to listen to me.”
“I'm used to people mixing us, don't worry” I say while playing with the medal. “And I actually am more into dark haired guys than brunettes like him.”
“Are you?”
“Yeah” I shrug, still focused on the medal. 
“Anything else you like in your men?” 
“Why are you interested?” I ask him, looking up and at his face, a little smirk on his lips. 
“Just curious about how the future Prince of Spain could look like” he shrugs.
“Well… I like men with interesting noses.”
“What?” he laughs.
“Yeah… I don't know how to explain it. But if you look at the list of men I'm attracted to, famous or not, they all have that in common. Yours would actually make the cut.”
“My nose?” he laughs again.
“I… It is too weird, isn't it? Urgh” I say, covering my face with my hands. And that, my friends, is how you ruin things with the guy you are trying to flirt with. 
“No, no. Not at all. Is just that no one had complimented my nose before. Most girls talk about my lips.”
“Your lips?” 
“They say they were made to kiss and be kissed. What do you think?”
“What?” I say, still covering my face.
“Are my lips kissable or not, your royal highness?” Pedri says, his hands suddenly on mine, moving them away to rest at my sides. But he doesn't let go once they get there. He keeps holding them, his fingers playing with mine, his thumbs sometimes caressing my knuckles or the inside of my wrist and sending waves of heat all the way up my arms. 
“They are ok” I manage to say.
“Just ok? I think I'm gonna have to move closer so you can see them better” he says, closing the space between us a bit more. 
“They just look like lips” I shrug. But that's a lie. Because his lips do look made to kiss and be kissed.
“Maybe if we moved towards the light…” he says, his hands suddenly on my waist, moving me until my back is against the big window, the light once again hitting his face in all the right places. 
I knew Pedri was handsome, but this handsome? Wow.
“Better now?”
“Let me see…” I say as I move forward a little bit, the medal doing it with me and hitting his chest. We are so close right now… “Nothing. Just lips.”
“Well, if you can't see anything, I'll guess we'll have to try with a different sense. Like touch, for example.”
“What?”
“How does this feel, your royal highness?” he says, gently taking one of my hands and kissing it, the other still resting on my waist.
“You can start calling me ma'am now. Royal highness is just for the first time you address me.” And how I've managed to give him a protocol lesson while feeling my skin burn on the spot where his lips have been, will forever be a mystery.
“Ma'am sounds like something for someone old. What about my lady?”
“You could also call me by my name” I shrug. 
“We just met, my lady. Aren't you going too fast?” Pedri smirks.
“Me? Who is the one looking for a way to kiss me?” I smirk back.
“Busted” he laughs. 
“Though if you want to kiss me, you just have to ask.”
“Ok, then. May I kiss you… my lady?”
“You may” I whisper. 
“Thank you” he smiles. “But…” he says, stopping just as his lips brush against mine. “After I've done it, will you tell if my lips are made to kiss and be kissed?” 
“I will.”
“A princess must keep her promises.”
“I will, I promise. Now are you going to kiss me or not?”
“As my lady commands” he smirks before finally doing it and kissing me. Pedri… the Pedri… is kissing me. And it is… wow. Just wow. “And?” he whispers against my lips.
“I haven't told you to stop.”
“So bossy” he chuckes.
“Well, I am your princess, am I not?”
“You are, yes.”
“Then as your princess, I'm telling you, Pedri González, to keep kissing me.”
“With my lips made to kiss and be kissed?” 
“With your lips made to kiss and be kissed, yes” I say, making him smile before kissing me again and… Oh, my God.
I thought winning the Euros earlier had felt amazing, but I was wrong. Being kissed by him, and in the way he is right now, is what truly feels amazing. 
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“I think this is yours” I say, giving Pedri his medal back.
“It looks better on you, tho.”
“Oh, stop it” I laugh, putting it around his neck, the place where my hands were resting not that long ago.
“It's the truth” he shrugs. “And do we seriously have to go back in there?” he says, nodding towards the party.
“We do, yes” I sigh. “But, we are meeting again tomorrow.”
“We are, yes. And you've promised me a tour of the palace. And a princess…”
“Keeps her promises” I smile.
“Exactly” Pedri smiles back. And we stay like that, just smiling like two idiots, until someone clears his throat behind us. Carlos, my bodyguard. “I think that's our cue to go inside.”
“I think it is, yes.”
“Do you think he will send the secret service after me if I kiss you one last time?” he whispers.
“There is nothing like trying” I shrug.
“Ok, then. Bro, look the other way!” he says to Carlos while I just laugh, his hands suddenly cupping my face before kissing me one last time. “No secret service?” he whispers, opening one eye. 
“No secret service.”
“Thank God” he sighs, making me laugh again. “Anyway… I should probably go in first, shouldn't I? Distract everyone with my limping so they won't look at you.”
“Oh, don't worry. No one looks at me, I'm the invisible princess.”
“Only someone blind would not look at you, my lady.”
“Thank you” I say, feeling my cheeks getting warm. We've been kissing and flirting, and him saying that is what finally makes me go shy. “But like I told you, I don't mind being invisible sometimes. This” I say, playing with the strap of his medal. “Would have not been possible if I was the heir. And the secret service would have definitely jumped at you the moment you got too close.”
“Lucky me, then” Pedri smiles.
“Lucky us” I smile back. “Now go. I can see Carlos getting impatient.”
“Urgh, fine… See you tomorrow?”
“See you tomorrow.”
“Ok. Good night, my lady” he says, kissing my cheek.
“Good night, sir” I giggle as I watch him walk back into the party, laughing one more time when he turns around to look at me and blows me a kiss.
“Feeling better, ma'am?” Carlos says behind me.
“Much better” I smile. 
“Then I'm sorry about what I'm about to tell you, ma'am.”
“What?” I say, turning around to look at him.
“It's about him, about Pedri. Something I heard his friends talking about when I went back inside to give you some… privacy.”
“Carlos, you are starting to worry me.”
“I… I'm sorry, ma'am.”
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The next day…
“My lady.”
“Pedri.”
“I wasn't expecting to be offered croquetas at the royal palace” he chuckles, nodding at the table in front of us.
“Yeah, well.”
“When we met earlier it was kind of awkward, wasn't it? Shaking hands with your parents and your sister, acting as if we didn't know each other and nothing had happened last night…”
“Did something happen last night?” I ask, eating an olive and finally looking at him. “Besides you winning the Euros, I mean.”
“We… you… what?” he says with a confused look.
“I don't remember anything important happening” I shrug.
“You don't… Oh. Oh, I get it. You are teasing me because out here someone could hear us” Pedri says, looking around at his teammates. After meeting the whole team inside the palace, we are now in the gardens, everyone chatting, having a drink and relaxing before they have to go to Cibeles to celebrate.
“I'm not teasing you, Pedri. I don't remember anything” I shrug again. “Wait, no. I do remember one thing” I say, moving forward. “That you are a dick” I whisper in his ear before walking away.
“That I'm what? What are you talking about?” he says before following me. 
“Is your hearing also injured?”
“My hearing is perfect, my lady” he says, struggling to keep up with me. “What I don't understand is why.”
“Why what?” I say, suddenly stopping. We've walked away from where everyone else is, kind of hidden behind some bushes.
“Why are you calling me a dick? What did I do?”
“Do you seriously have to ask?” I laugh.
“Yeah.”
“I can't believe it” I laugh again. “You fucking used me, Pedri!”
“What?”
“You used me to have a laugh with your friends! You made a bet with them to see who could get a kiss from me first!”
“What?” he says again, looking more and more confused by the second.
“Carlos heard them talking about it, so don't you dare try to deny it. I'm sure you all had a laugh this morning when you told them everything that happened between us.”
“We don't… I…”
“I was an easy target, wasn't I? The poor princess that no one looks at, the one who always is in the shadow of her sister, who always is the second option. I'm sure you felt so proud when you told them how easily I fell for your charms, how stupid I was. But not anymore, you hear me. Not anymore.”
“That's not what happened” Pedri says, grabbing me by the arm when I try to walk away, earning himself a even more deadly look than the ones I was already giving him. “Sorry. I'm sorry” he says, letting go. “But please let me explain myself.”
“Why? Why would I do that? You manipulated me once, you could do it again. I am that stupid.”
“You aren't stupid, and I didn't manipulate you. I…” he says, running a hand through his hair. “The boys were talking about who could get you out of your misery, that's true. We were watching you talking with your dad and those men, and you looked so… Bored. Like you wished to be anywhere but there. But I wasn't part of it, I swear. I actually was getting mad while listening to them and the way they were talking about you. So before any of them found the guts to go talk to you just for fun, I did it myself. Not the go talking with you for fun part. The one about finding the guts to go talk to you. Because I… I have a bit of a crush on you.”
“What?” I laugh.
“Yeah” he says, nervously touching his cheek. A cheek that had turned almost as red as his Spain's shirt. “Here, look” he says, taking his phone out of his pocket. “I have proof.”
“Proof of what? You being an idiot?”
“An idiot for you, yes” he says, showing me what he had been looking for on his phone. “It's a WhatsApp conversation I had with my brother yesterday before the game when it was announced that you were attending. You can check the date and the time, it isn't fake.”
Your girlfriend is gonna be at the game tonight 🤭 If you win she may give you a kiss 😚 Instead of Casillas and Sara Carbonero, Pedri and the princess ⚽👸🏻👩🏻‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏻 
“This… This means nothing” I say, giving him his phone back. 
“I can show you more messages from him teasing me about it. Look.”
People are shipping Gavi with the princess after the game 😂 Maybe he could introduce you to her little sister 😏 Gavi king and you prince 😂
“I… Pedri…”
“Everything that happened last night was real. I swear it” he says. “I didn't kiss you because of a bet with my friends. I kissed you because I wanted to. Because I like you.”
“You don't know me. Like, you barely know anything about me, only what the press publishes.”
“I know enough. Because to me” he says, taking one of my hands on his, his thumb caressing my knuckles like he had last night. “To me you aren't invisible or someone's shadow. To me, you shine brighter than anyone else. King, queen, heir to the throne or whatever.”
“That's so cheesy” I chuckle.
“But the truth.”
“Pedri, I…” I say, meeting his eyes. He isn't lying. Everything he's said about kissing me because he wanted to and not because of a bet, about liking me, about me not being the invisible princess I always believe myself to be… All that is true. I can see it in his face, on his blushed cheeks, in his eyes. He is being honest about it all. “I believe you.”
“You… You do?”
“I do” I nod.
“Thank God” he sighs. “I thought any moment now you would call the secret service and they would send me to… Where do they send people when they arrest them?”
“Can't tell you. It is the secret service for a reason” I wink.
“Makes sense” he chuckles. “But does this mean that I am not a dick anymore or…?” he says, closing the space between us a bit.
“Well… There is something you could do to make me completely forget about it” I say, also moving closer towards him.
“Something like what?” he asks, his other hand finding mine, now both his thumb caressing my skin, bringing back the waves of heat I felt last night. 
“You could kiss me with those lips of yours” I smirk.
“Here?” he says, looking around. “What if someone comes this way and sees us? Like someone from the team, your dad or… your mum. Your mum is quite scary, you know?”
“Oh, I know” I laugh. “But if we move over here…” I say, walking us behind a big tree, my back against it. “No one will see us. We'll be… invisible” I smile.
“You are anything but invisible, my lady” Pedri smiles back, his hands letting go of mine and moving to rest on my waist.
“Then show me” I say, wrapping my arms around his neck. 
“Will you then give me a tour of the palace? You promised it last night, and a princess…”
“Keps her promises, I know.”
“Exactly” he smirks.
“First we kiss, then we do the tour. But just so you know, Carlos will probably join us.”
“Wait, is he here?” Pedri says, looking around, his eyes wide.
“He may be hiding behind a bush, yes” I laugh.
“Shit. If he sees together after what he heard last night…”
“I'll explain everything to him, don't worry. But if you are being serious about getting to know me…”
“Deadly.”
“Then you better start getting used to his presence.”
“I think I can do that. Because you” he says, brushing his nose against mine and making me giggle. “Are worth it, my lady. So worth it” Pedri says before finally kissing me again, making me feel what he has been telling me since we met: that I'm not just someone's shadow, a second option. That I am not the invisible princess anymore. 
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