#people complain about that. gets cancelled. like the fucking audacity first of all like.

[bishonenspit]

international eroica fans are some of the most ungrateful fans of anything i have ever encountered i stg

[ablednt]

It really hurt me when you kept specifying nd people instead of all disabled people. Do you really think physically disabled people get to keep our kids and not suffer abuse and stuff?

Bestie

1. That post is (very likely) old

2. I'm physically disabled as well and I'm well aware how it effects people and the resulting ableism.

3. I never said it was ONLY ND people but the focus of this blog is neurodivergence. A lot of marginalized people have the same risks, and of course things stack up and are intersectional.

4. I feel way more comfortable talking about neurodivergence than physical disability because A) parts of the community are simultaneously very gate-keepy and also very ableist against nd people and I don't want to deal with that! And B) I have a complicated relationship with physical disability and my body, I have had little luck finding solace or support in the wider community because I'm not certain in my experiences, exactly what disabilities I have, etc.

I know you probably just saw an old post and assumed that because I specified ND there that I was able bodied and excluding you (which is fair enough there's plenty of ableist ND people) but I also talk about physical disability a fair bit and the ableism that comes with it so this blog is in no way exclusive of that and it wouldn't have taken you long to confirm that before sending this?

I'm sorry my words hurt you, genuinely, but I don't owe it to tumblr to have perfect fully inclusive impossible to fail word choice. Not everything is about everyone and that's okay!

I can talk about issues that effect one group and specify that group even if it effects other groups too it's not exclusion it's focusing on one aspect of the issue.

[recklessmark]

PLEASE PLEASE WRITE A CHEATING ANGST WHERE MARK IS BEING SUCH A JERK ABT IT EVEN THO Y/N CATCHES HIM CHEATING ON HER AND ALSO MAKE THE PERSON MARK IS CHEATING WITH MEAN TOO, those stories are really the best kind of angst - anon ❤️

words count: 1.2k

warnings: angst, cheating

a/n: i have no mood for angst now i’m so sorry. this is not very miserable at all since i refused to let y/n cry pathetically in front of douchebag mark 😡 but hopefully you’ll like it.

you take a sip of your chardonnay, the other hand is still busy scrolling on your phone. your face puts on the best do-not-talk-to-me look while your fingers typing on the screen with a fast speed.

y/n: where are yo-

no, you delete the sentence.

y/n: can you pick me up after work?

delivered.

your fingers idly tap on the bar counter, flashing the bartender an encouraging smile as if you’re not currently having murder on your mind. after about less than 5 minutes, your phone buzzes on the marble surface and you take it in your hands again.

mark: i’m having meeting, i’ll probably stay over at my office either.

your lips curl into a crooked smile. executioner style.

y/n: you better sleep with one eye open tonight.

y/n:

you bite your bottom lip, trying to keep your composure and delete the yet-to-be-sent message. all you’re seeing is red now. mark lee, your lovely boyfriend has the audacity to tell you he’s having a meeting. a two people meeting, one man one woman, in a hotel. little does the two-timing, cheap-lying wannabe know that you’re sitting at the bar of the hotel he takes his side chick in. and you have to clarify that either you and your friends have caught him hang out with other women multiple times but you, a faithful girlfriend, brainlessly believe in him and maybe he will change. the only thing has changed ever since is his loyalty to you, wondrously decreases.

you leave a tip under your glass and jump of the stool. you turn at the corner, walking inside the hotel building. unfortunate for mark is that you have some work here, otherwise you couldn’t catch the sight he wrapped his arm around a girl and walked into the hotel. but work can be done later.

“good evening, how can i help you?” the receptionist greets you politely and you give her a smile. “y/f/n y/l/n, i have a business meeting with mr grey.”

the woman nods and types something on the laptop while you rake your eyes around the building. “floor 8, room 805, ms y/l/n.”

you smile in acknowledgment and turn around to walk away. “oh,” you put on a fake gape and glare back and the receptionist, “may i ask where’s mr lee’s room, i have to take something from him. mark lee please.”

she looks confused but obliges your command anyway. “floor 8, room 802.” you give her a “thank you” and stroll toward the elevator. god must be unpleasant with mark so that his room is on the same floor with yours. you take your phone out and decide to reply the previous message of him.

y/n: i have a meeting at imperial building either, we can go home together.

delivered.

adrenaline and rage rushing inside your veins as the monitor screen displays the red number 8. you take your steps slowly, the sound of your heels clicking against the floor reverberates around the empty floor.

801-805

seeing the gold banner on the wall, you turn at the corner. your head dizzy as you think about what’s happening inside the 802 room. standing in front of the wide wooden door, you decisively press your finger on the doorbell. just once and patiently wait for someone to open the door. although every room is soundproof but you can hear a small voice from the inside after about two minutes, you’re not complaining though, you have big heart for patience.

a ‘genuine’ smile plasters on your face as the door flings opened, revealing a woman- your coworker surprisingly and she only has a towel wrapped around her body. “hi,” you say and walk inside before she could process anything that’s going on. “where’s mark? mark lee.” you ask and opposite of your nonchalance, she makes a quite smart decision to throw a tantrum.

“what the hell y/n?! if you know he doesn’t even like you anymore why are you here? he will never go home so don’t cry and beg for it!”

“where’s ma-“ you calmly repeat yourself and suddenly you see your boyfriend gets out of the bathroom, with a towel wrapped around his hips either. his toned chest and abs look nice but they’ll be better if there’s some bullets shot through. “oh mister executioner, i was wondering where you are.”

mark gapes as he sees you, apparently hasn’t read your new message. he heard haven - his side chick was yelling and he was curious what she’s so frantic about. and now he understands.

you sit down at the cafe table and cross your legs. “you may speak now.” you flash him a reluctant smile.

“speak what? he has nothing to explain-“

“look,” mark cuts haven off and starts his meaningless explanation, “i don’t love you anymore, you’re always busy and your spare time is for work either!”

“my spare time is for work?!” you exclaim, “you are the one who fucking cancel all our dates and hangs out with your side chicks! you think i’m stupid that i’m totally clueless about what you do behind my back?” your voice is shaky yet you try to keep it as steady as possible. you’re not going to cry in front of him and his bitch.

“you call who’s a side chick?” haven yells, pointing her finger at you and you dart your eyes at her, “i’m not talking to you, don’t let me lose the tiny respect i’m still having for you. we’re both women and we work together, i don’t want to be rude.”

“you’re fucking fake as hell-“

“shut up,” mark shouts, making the woman shut her mouth and then turns back to you. “don’t act like you’re not flirting with other men at work, you’re a whore!” he says loudly and you’re practically speechless.

mark calls you a whore.

“since when i flirt with men?” you ask in a calm, quiet tone. you have completely no idea what he’s talking about because you’re certain that you only keep a professional and friendly relationship with any man you know except of mark.

“haven sent me a lot of photos of you and other guys,” he remarks and now you understand, your eyes give your shameless coworker a death stare as she’s avoiding your gaze. “who has the interest in this affair first?”

“me,” mark responds. now he knows how to he honest. “i like her first.”

you let out a chuckle unexpectedly, “so you like hannah, sophia, iris and my best friend as well?” it’s unbelievable that you still have faith in this man even though he hit on your best friend once and she’s already warned you about it.

as mark can’t say anything to defend himself, you stand up, “i’ll pack up your things and send it to your address. don’t ever walk into my place again.” you give him the last peck on his thin lips and walk away but not before giving your coworker a reminder.

“you’ve heard what i said, i hope you’re not the one who chooses to be stupid now.”

slamming the door close, you let out a heavy breath, feeling you’re about to stumble on your weak knees. you love mark so much that it blinds you, no matter how many times you saw him with other women, you still pretended to be clueless. you keep him beside you since you think that he will change but it’s just your one-way deduction which unfortunately could not be true. you hold back the tears in your watering eyes, you will cry when you’re home, not before you get your work done.

[letme-sleep-please]

To give y’all some background our lobby is closed due to being too small to maintain proper social distancing standards. Appointments are drop off only. People have no patience. Have some client stories:

We lock the doors when we aren’t talking to clients outside so they don’t barge in. One of my coworkers goes outside to discuss with another client about their pets care. A different sees the opportunity to walk in the lobby DESPITE THE GIANT FUCKING STOP SIGN THAT TELLS THEM NOT TO. Then they proceed to get mad at me when I tell them to wait outside and I’ll meet them out there and that our lobby is closed. “But I’m already inside,” yeah but still get out. If one client goes in they will all want to go in. We only let euthanasia’s in or clients that need to see like abnormal xrays or whatnot. Get out.

A client complaining to me about the whole mask situation. I just straight up told them I’m having to wear mine for nine hours (don’t worry I change it about every two to three hours depending). I’m so done with people and the mask argument when they complain about going into the store for five minutes.

A different client today who, again saw the opportunity and walked into the lobby when a coworker was outside, then got mad at me for telling them to go back outside I will talk to them then. Client then proceeded to tell me about how our ER wasn’t even that strict and I do wanted to tell them that they are even stricter because when I went there I was temperature checked at the door, required to wear a mask, then (due to my symptoms at this point) brought into a room that recycled my own air back to me, and anyone who stepped into that room was in full blown PPE. I mean we are having clients wear masks if they come into the building but we aren’t temperature checking or going through the entire process the ER is making you do for even stepping into the waiting room.

We pull bags and cases of food aside for our clients and label them that way when they arrive it’s ready to go and we don’t have to hunt in the back for it. We had a client come up to the door, knock, look through and see that my coworker was putting on her mask to greet her, before angrily knocking maybe five seconds later. When my coworker opens the door the lady gets in my coworkers personal space and just says “dog food”. To which my coworker asked if she called in beforehand and she replies “what do you want me to go to my truck and call you guys? That’s ridiculous.” My coworker explained that it was in case it had been pulled already and then she almost pushed past my coworker to point at the dog food stand in our lobby saying “it’s right there let me just go get it.” Of course we can’t do that because lobby closure you know so my coworker grabs the food and asks for a last name. The lady says Smith and is mad when we ask for further information to find her account. Pretty much the rest of the interaction she’s short with us in general.

Client yells at me because they can’t be there to hold their pet for an exam. There are multiple things wrong with this first of all. 1. We cannot legally have a client hold their pet for liability reasons. If they hold incorrectly and injure their pet, it’s our fault. If they hold incorrectly and their pet bites either us or them, our fault. So this wouldn’t happen anyways and hasn’t happened for years. 2. There’s a pandemic going on and holding a pet requires you to be sometimes mere inches from the vet. So obviously you can’t social distance. It’s impossible. 3. This dog has a history of being aggressive with its owner in the room. We have to take the dog out of the room regardless to safely and calmly look in it’s ears or teeth or whatever we’re doing to it. The dog is perfectly fine without it’s owner there and actually pretty loveable. When I explain all of the above reasons (except for three though because she believes that her dog does better with her and will only listen to the vet.) she then gets mad at me and asks when I expect the lobby to be open. I tell her I don’t know because pandemic. She tells me that that isn’t a good reason and I should just know. She holds off on the appointment until she can be there.

Client tries to push past coworkers to enter lobby and when they get told no they begin to tell coworkers that this whole thing is a conspiracy. When my coworkers tell them that it’s for their safety they respond with “I bet you don’t even know anyone who had it.” My coworkers say actually one of the receptionists (yo it’s me!) had it and now has recovered and been clear for a month now but this is why those precautions are in place. The clients go from “This is a conspiracy” to “you we’re trying to kill us.”

The people who get mad when I tell them that we are doing drop off appointments only and they respond with “well how do I know that you’re going to take care of my dog?” We are a vets office??? It’s our job to take care of your animals???? If you don’t trust to leave your animal with your vet maybe you should get a different one. Trust me. Behind closed doors it’s all baby talk and petting the cute animals. More baby talk and less petting with the aggressive ones though.

Just in general the clients who incorrectly wear masks or you know take off the mask to talk to us or even better the client who TAKES OFF THEIR MASK TO SNEEZE. WHAT???

The client who saw the opportunity to get other clients to sign a petition in the parking lot to ban more comprehensive sex education in our state and continue to only teach abstinence. (I wish I was joking)

The many clients who knock, peek through the window, try the door handle three or four times and when I go out to greet them they ask why it was locked despite the many signs on the door and their appointment reminder telling them that the lobby is closed due to being unable to maintain proper social distancing standards. We’ve also gotten into the habit of telling them that when we schedule appointments too.

The client who pulls up where they aren’t visible to us and honks. We are right by a highway inside a pretty well insulated brick building. It sounds like someone honking from the highway so odds are we will just ignore it. Then said client comes and keeps rattling the doorknob until we come up and ask how we can help them. You can still see us through the door, if you feel that it’s locked and see us coming why would you still try it?

A different client than the one I was working with outside driving up and interrupting me to tell me that she had their puppy there for an appointment and was tired of waiting. The best part about this was (sarcasm) the client I was working with was crying as I was handing her back her carrier with her dead cat we just euthanized inside (don’t worry she was wrapped up nicely in her favorite blankie and other clients couldn’t see inside). Why on earth would you interrupt a conversation with an employee and a crying client??? Also she just drove up, she wasn’t waiting at all.

The client who drove up, parked, and I was on the phone so I couldn’t greet them immediately. A different coworker comes up front and sees them, then she goes to see how we can help them. This client had the audacity to say that she had been waiting there for thirty minutes and all I did was just stare at her. No. Also if you read our sign it says if you aren’t helped promptly to knock.

The client who tried to tell us that it was their right to be in the building during a phone call to remind them about their pets appointment. They then cancelled the appointment but still showed up to it and tried to get into the lobby. The client then told us that they never cancelled their appointment and that “they would be going to elsewhere” and requested their animals records. My coworker was more than happy to get the copies for them so that we no longer have to deal with them as a client.

The person who yelled at me at the beginning of the pandemic when I told them that a dog neuter was considered an elective surgery according to the state and was not emergent therefore we could not perform it at that time. Client replied, “well it’s an emergency to me.” The dog was three and did not have an emergency.

Dog grooming just got cleared to open up along with elective surgeries (spays, neuters, the like). Before it opened up though I lost count of how many people asked me when it would and when I didn’t know because it’s up to the state then promptly get mad at me. I don’t have a crystal ball.

So as you can see, people have been perfectly sane about this entire pandemic. Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

[kariachi]

Okay guys, I’m getting a liveblog done today if it kills me. This one is gonna take a bit longer to do, because I hurt my hand so typing is bleh, but we carry on!

Xingo Nation, because my son is the most important thing in this franchise.

Have I mentioned lately that I love the use of music in this show? Because I do. Also, yay Kelly Turnbull! This promises to at least be fun visually then.

“Now we’re not saying it was aliens-” says nerd-on-tv in front of several pictures of America’s Next Top Space Squid.

Oh look, a Mike production. I miss him, he should’ve gotten more and better, wasted potential as a villain and character.

Ben, not impressed by this tv lineup.

Oh lords, he’s not even feeling Xingo? Gwen check his temperature I think the boy may be ill.

Lucky Girl and Xingo run in the same timeslot. No wonder Ben and Gwen are so primed to argue.

And lo, the fighting begins. Watch the feelings show, Ben, it’s good for you. A magical girl a day keeps the toxic masculinity at bay.

Ben’s response to not being able to steal the remote back from Gwen is to go Stinkfly and odor her into submission.

Ooo, Lucky Girl goes for female villains and what looks to be an all female main cast. It is Sailor Moon for Gwens. Takes the color coding to a whole new level though.

Queen Griefenstein, lords preserve me

Lucky Girl: *talks about ‘an insecure heart corrupts the soul’* Kevin: *ruins a display in the process of stealing a remote* ~I love this sort’ve storytelling~

Bystander: It’s so nice to see a little boy in touch with his emotions like that Kevin: *insecure preteen panic*

“Uh, what? I don’t have emotions!” My son

Pausing because I can’t feel my hands, be back when they aren’t numb

If nothing else can we stop and acknowledge the emo poet panicking at the concept that 1) he may have emotions, and 2) he may be in touch with them

Kevin Levin, going from ‘bad mood’ to ‘insecure panic’ to ‘okay, Xingo, this is properly non-feelingsy’ over the span of 20 seconds

“haha Violence.“ My son

There is a character on the Xingo show complaining about said show getting bad ratings. I’m not surprised, I’m just acknowledging the matter.

Kevin: *yet more preteen panic*

Kevin, honey, take a step back, check the internet, confirm before you panic.

...okay, I don’t agree with calling Lucky Girl garbage, but 18 seasons is excessive. Honestly by that point it probably is garbage, nothing can survive that long without devolving into chaff. Quick, somebody get this child the 1st season, stat!

Plus a Japan-only radio drama, a comic to-in, and a spin-off series. Damn. Also Kevin, dearheart, you know a suspicious amount about Lucky Girl and it’s various works for someone who supposedly thinks it’s garbage.

My son, my dear, sweet, insecure, ‘I have no emotions and totally have nothing to do with anything that may acknowledge emotions exist’ son

11-year-olds

Check the fucking internet before you go alien over this, child

My son is a moron. Brilliant, but a moron.

Xingo: *potentially cancelled cartoon panic*

Oh look, the Xingo x Lucky Girl Crossover everyone’s been waiting for

I think I’m gonna have to try muting this and going off subtitles, just to actually get through it sometime before the turn of the next decade.

(Also, can I just say how I love that this decade’s first liveblog includes Kevin yelling ‘I don’t have emotions’. Feels like it’s setting a good baseline for the next ten years of Kevin content (which you will be getting, don’t doubt it))

Queen Griefenstein: *has too high of standards to work with Xingo*

Xingo pies Lucky Girl. To see Kevin’s reaction you would think this was the funniest thing to happen ever.

*snort* Okay, that second pieing was funny.

Ben has successfully gassed Gwen out of the Rustbucket.

Welp.

Max: *explaining the majesty of free hotdogs*

..........double welp. Maybe Xingo needs cancelling.

Max: Maybe they’re doing a crossover Gwen: The audacity to even think-

Kevin: *laughs in the distance* Ben: The audacity-

Honestly the best part here is Kevin has no reason to think setting Xingo loose could go badly. He’s had nothing to do with and heard nothing of the shit Xingo keeps pulling. In his inexperienced 11-yo mind this makes perfect sense.

Ben: *fiercely demands to know if Kevin is the one who set Xingo loose* Kevin: Uh, nope Xingo: Buddy!

Kevin wasn’t even looking for trouble today, he just found it. My headcanon that he is a walking disaster area continues to be supported.

He is not comfortable with Xingo reaching out of the tv to pat him on the head.

“-while I go put marinara in Lucky Girl’s wig“ welp

Mike’s character did not deserve a Xingo smooch, and his character’s love interest did not deserve to have a Xingo smooch their guy. Just because Mike is 100% Immortal Little Shit does not mean they aren’t good people

Oh gods that UAF expy is as painful as the show

Note to self: Do not let Xingo on the news

Operation Change The Fucking Channel is a go

Scratch that, Operation Shut off the Goddamn TVs is a go

I gotta say, at this point at least we really need an Argit. Give Kev a steady friend with limits on the trouble they’ll get him into.

Welp. Better go find another remote Gwen

Ah, yes, the channel change buttons on the tv proper, so handy

“-where two obnoxious boys who can turn into alien monsters have engaged in combat“ That’s it, that’s the show

Also, oo, Max got ice cream. Honestly until told otherwise I’m going to assume the entire reason Kevin is here is for the free food.

Gwen saves the day, holy fuck that was close. We do not need a Xingo the size of a planet

‘Kev-a-lev-a-ding-dong’ good lords

‘Second rate’ goddamn will somebody give this child a fucking break! I swear he’s been appreciated once and a combo of Ben and his own issues screwed it up!

My baby...

Ben, while Xingo is tearing Kevin down to nothing: ....... Ben, when Kevin’s temper starts going: *shocked*

And lo but the boys were on the same page again, because Xingo couldn’t keep his big mouth shut.

I love these children

The boys working together and Kevin hitting Xingo so hard he flew through several shows and right back into Lucky Girl.

‘Constructive criticism‘ somebody hit him again

Hello Lucky Girl, thank you Lucky Girl

And lo, Xingo was no longer an immediate issue

Kevin: *causes problem* Team Tennyson: *celebrate solving problem* Kevin: Bitch, without me-

Huh, it’s a Wednesday. Now I’m even more annoyed I wasn’t feeling up to doing this liveblog yesterday

Lucky Girl: *talks about ‘rattling the rifts between enemies’ and emotional honesty* Ben & Kev: *’not emotions no’ cringe*

Ben is all for the ‘if you can’t talk out your problems, punch a bitch’ moral of the day and now is willing to give Lucky Girl a shot

Meanwhile Kevin is at first confused- or possibly concerned- by the moral, then Ben’s response to it, and then goes right back to ‘I totally don’t enjoy this show, I would never, I Am The Night’

Then slips into the next aisle back and moves a box so he can watch the episode in secret

These children are so cute

10/11, not perfect but close enough

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

The First Purge review

The Purge is such a fascinating series to me in that it goes through the reverse of what you might expect a series to go through. The first film had an interesting concept - a night of legalized crime in which society indulges in its most base desires and goes about murdering - but instead of exploring or even SHOWING us this, instead we get a s0-so home invasion film where a rich white couple fights off masked intruders. Yawn.

But then came the sequels, and with them the director seemed to realize all of the social and political commentary that could be mined from such a subject as the Purge, and by god did they run with it. This is a series that ascended in quality, with the sequels just getting better and better, and while you can debate which film is the best in the series, no one will ever say it’s the first one.

Because of all this, I think I can safely say at this point I love The Purge series. Its lack of subtlety in its social commentary and political criticisms combined with its over-the-top violence and sinister government conspiracies makes me incredibly endeared to it; I think we all too often forget subtlety is not always the best, and in the current political climate I think The Purge series is kinda the hot cup of tea we need to be served. And out of all the movies in the series, The First Purge may be the hottest cup of tea of all.

So you know that criticism the films get, where “Oh, everyone goes out to kill? That’s so unrealistic, people would probably just vandalize or do drugs or whatever, why is it murder?” Well, this movie, in showing the test run for what became the Purge, shows us… exactly that. Despite the government offering money to poor, disenfranchised, and struggling people on Staten Island, the testing grounds for this new system… they record one murder done by a man named Skeletor, who was an insane, frothing-at-the-mouth violent lunatic before any of this. Everyone else? They’re having block parties, fucking in public, or just messing with people. The worst crimes in the early hours are the murders Skeletor commits and some robberies committed by people who were already drug-dealing gangsters. There’s also a creepy guy wearing a crying baby doll on his face who set up a trap so he can grab women and drag them into the sewer so he can grab their pussies, but that’s neither here nor there; the point is, the Purge isn’t doing what the evil political party the New Founding Fathers want. So what do they do? They decide to fudge the results of this test by flying in mercenaries, Klansmen, just real fucking evil and violent people, to massacre the poor so that they can get the numbers up. This isn’t really a spoiler - this is all stuff proudly displayed in the sequels - but seeing how even early on the government twisted a social experiment so they could sell legalized murder of the poor to the public is truly disturbing.

Our heroes are gangster Dmitri, his ex girlfriend and anti-Purge protestor Nya, and her little brother Isaiah who has decided to go out so he can kill Skeletor. Can they survive this night? I mean, we know the Purge is gonna be going on for another couple of decades at least, but will these guys be ok?

So the film is about as subtle as a brick to the face, as I’m sure you can tell from what I described, but I think that’s what makes me say this is the smartest film in the series. Our country NEEDS a lack of subtlety right now. And I think we forget that sometimes a lack of subtlety helps make a compelling narrative; look at American History X, for example. That movie is entirely unsubtle, but it is effective and well done. Now, I’m not saying this film is as good as American History X, but I do think this movie’s lack of subtlety helps it along. Every major character in the film is a minority of some kind - our main characters are all black, and we see Asians, Latinos, even an older gay couple. Pretty much everyone in this film is struggling or poverty-stricken. And the villains? An evil group of sadistic government assholes who think slaughtering the poor is the best way to help the public, and when people don’t wanna buy into it, they create a false flag operation to sell the idea of legalized killing. There’s really no good white people in this movie, save for, interestingly enough, the woman who came up with the idea of the Purge in the first place. While at first she seems as evil and politically motivated as any other person working for the NFFA, as soon as she notices things getting ultra violent she becomes suspicious and finds out her test’s data is being fudged by mercs being flown in to kill the poor. She gets shipped off to Staten Island and killed for her trouble. Like I said, UNSUBTLE. But it is pretty effective.

The most fascinating character in this film is probably Skeletor, an absolutely insane black man who signed up for this night so he could get paid for indiscriminately killing people. He’s the kind of utterly fanatical murderer you’d expect from this series, and his actor Rotimi Paul steals every single scene he’s in. It makes it all the more of a letdown when he doesn’t get the honor of a final fight with the protagonists, despite being set up as a major villain, but even his anti-climactic ending is pretty cool as he manages to sneak up on and kill armed soldiers while being nearly naked.

And of course it wouldn’t be a Purge film without a bunch of creeps in masks. We have the baby-doll pussy grabber, we have a creepy rag face guy who just walks down a hallway creepily, we have this insane butcher guy in what looks like a welding mask, and best of all, in the final battle, we have what I can only describe as… a Gimp Nazi. For some more general mooks we also have truckloads of Klansmen as well as some masked cops who beat down a black man in… well do I REALLY need to explain what they’re going for there? Unsubtle, remember. Of course, with all these nasty folk out and about, it becomes extremely cathartic to watch them get stabbed, neck snapped, and gunned down by our heroes. Let me tell you, seeing Klansmen murdered is always a good time.

Honestly, this movie is an excellent example of a modern Blaxploitation film; it has pretty much all the trappings of the genre, as it’s set in a poor neighborhood, has a majority black cast, features the protagonists fighting against The Man and the oppression of evil white folk… all that’s missing is some kung-fu and some more funk in the soundtrack. And that just makes me love the film all the more, because boy do I love me some blaxploitation.

I highly recommend this movie. It’s really great; unsubtle, yes, definitely, but great. Sadly, I think this movie is not going to do quite as well as I think it deserves to. The way our society is right now, people get really hostile at any sort of indictment of modern politics; any criticism of our dumbass president is met with angry people getting offended that someone dares to criticize a soulless politician (a redundant phrase, I know). We just live in a time and place where people are just really hostile towards any sort of social or political commentary, and I sadly think this movie will be a victim of it due to its indictment of conservative ideology, racism, and Trump-era politics. It’s not a shock to me that most of the reviews of this on IMDB are all colored with some sort of anger that this film has the AUDACITY to try and be intelligent, with a good chunk of reviews calling it “biased” and “political propaganda”… oh well. I pray this movie finds its audience, either now or in the future. Because boy oh boy do I believe it deserves it.

Long live The Purge.

BUT WAIT! Just to prove my point… take a look at some of these excerpts from a few absolutely ridiculous IMDB user reviews! We’ve got it all here folks!

Accusations of being written by children combined with whining about how this film is made to “Divide” while also throwing in potshots at Star Wars and Get Out? CHECK!

Accusations of race baiting? CHECK!

Complaining about criticisms of Trump? CHECK! As an added bonus, this guy cancelled his ticket - hey buddy, how’d you review this film opening day if you didn’t go?

Crying about how the film is propaganda? Cheeeeeeeeeeeck!

Whining about BLM? Oh boy do we got a big old check!

And hey let’s just have one more whiny little bitch before we go:

[just-come-baek]

force of attraction

Pairing: Taehyung x Reader

Themes: smut | ghostbusters!au | ex lovers!au

Word count: 14.1k

Summary: Taehyung is a brilliant nut job, and along with Hoseok and Jin, these scaredy-cats, we bust ghost.

Warnings: a bit jealous and slightly possessive Taehyung, mentions of ghosts but not in a scary way, humor sprinkled with lame retorts, unprotected sex, literally a single smack, oral!receiving

Glossary: P.K.E. meter – a device designed specifically to locate Psychokinetic Energy in an area. CDI System – a way to set categories to types of supernatural phenomenon. Proton Pack – a weapon used to attack and confine ghosts.

Masterlist

“You wished to see us, dean?” Taehyung asked as he plopped down in the chair in front of the dean’s desk, his legs up on the top of the mahogany wooden surface, Jin and Hoseok trailing behind him, yet not daring to display such nonchalant and rude behavior toward their employer. Unlike Taehyung, they knew how to respect their boss. If it came to rules and regulations or even proper work etiquette, Taehyung perceived it more like clues, and not exactly like principles.

“Yeah, thanks for arriving at such short notice,” dean started, as he put down his fancy fountain pen, and entwined his fingers, staring at the doctors in front of him, “I am very sorry to announce that, but the university no longer can fund your scientific activities. The faculty council has decided to shut down your department, and move the funds over to the faculty of medicine.”

“Nah, you can’t be serious, Namjoon,” Taehyung spoke with the audacity to address the dean by his first name. “You can’t do this, not now, not when we’ve almost finished the prototype of the Proton Pack! It’s gonna be a breakthrough in our field. You can’t cancel our funds.”

“It doesn’t matter, you don’t have students, and we’re adjusting the programme to our students’ interests. You have no attendance.” Dean announced, and Hoseok and Jin exchanged meaningful glances.

“Recently, the attendance is remarkably high, sir,” Hoseok answered with utter respect, grinning sheepishly only for his smile to fade away as soon as Namjoon shot him a doubtful glare. As the dean, he knew the statistics, and he wasn’t the one to be fooled. Particularly not by these nut jobs. “My last lecture on cannibalistic rites of ancient New Guinea tribesmen was viewed by two students. And I may proudly add, no one slept through it.”

“Believe me, Hoseok; I’ve heard about such an occurrence,” Namjoon admitted truthfully, and Hoseok beamed brightly at his superior, “however, because of your passionate lecture I’m dealing with a lawsuit, do you want to talk about that in great detail?”

“It’s not my fault that some students are weak wusses,” Hoseok commented under his breath, and smiled at Namjoon who tried to decipher Hoseok’s remark.

“Namjoon, listen, you don’t want to do this,” Taehyung started, as he changed his previous position, now leaning forward, resting his upper body on his elbow, staring at the dean as if trying to intimidate him. In vain, though. Taehyung had been working for the university for two years now, and at this point, Namjoon knew how to deal with him. “We’re two, maybe three days away from the biggest discovery of the century. You can’t just sack us!”

“It has already been decided, sorry, but my hands are tied,” Namjoon said, sounding as cold as an automatic secretary, as he arranged documents on his desk.

“We’re not gonna give up,” Taehyung threatened before he and his co-workers exited the dean’s office.

“What are we going to do now?” Jin asked, as soon as Taehyung closed the doors. Amongst the three of them, Jin was the one who handled the issue the worst; it was the very first time when he didn’t have everything under control. How could Taehyung and Hoseok be so fucking calm? Jin was a nervous wreck; his pulse was rapid, his hands shaking. Fifteen minutes ago, he was an academic teacher and a parapsychological researcher at a prestigious university, and now, he was an unemployed scientist with a useless diploma.

The parapsychological field was a bitch when it came to employment; either you’re a respected scientist or a looked-down-to diviner who struggles to get by every month.

“Don’t worry boys, everything will be alright,” Taehyung assured them, although no one, not even Taehyung himself, was convinced. “Maybe it’s about time to take matters into our own hands? The Proton Pack is almost ready; we don’t need the university’s money, only our big heads. How difficult can it be?”

“For you? Probably insurmountably,” Jin snorted as he remembered how many times during their college days Taehyung had failed economics. In any other field, Taehyung was a genius; however, when he had been about to take the economics exam, he had been daft as a brush. When he had been a student, he had mastered parapsychology, psychology, physics, metallurgy, and whatnot! Only economics had managed to beat him for some reason.

“Spare me the attitude,” Taehyung barked back, not even trying to disguise his annoyance. He was just a human being; human beings are famous for their imperfections, and Taehyung’s only flaw seemed to be the incapability to learn basics of the economy.

“I guess we can try,” Hoseok spoke, and Taehyung and Jin looked at him as if they just realized Hoseok was a part of the conversation as well. “We’ve just got fired. I mean… it can’t get any worse, right?” He added, and his friends just couldn’t disagree.

“Okay, but he,” Jin pointed at Taehyung, “can’t go anywhere near the management. Leave it all up to me,” he added, and everyone silently approved.

“I don’t think a mortgage was a good idea,” Hoseok commented, as the three of them exited the bank.

“Don’t worry, nowadays everybody has at least three credits,” Taehyung spoke with a shrug, his eyes focused on the screen of his phone, as he scrolled through property offers, seeking for the most suitable location for their new company. “Once we commercialize our services, you’ll pay it back in a blink of an eye.”

“With twenty percent of interest rate? I may not be an expert, but it’s a total rip-off!” Hoseok asked and looked at Jin, hoping he would back up Taehyung’s statement. Unfortunately, Jin didn’t seem nearly as optimistic as Taehyung.

“If my calculations are right, after two years the interest rate alone will cost you over a fifty thousand.” Jin quietly muttered to himself, yet Hoseok managed to catch what interested him the most. Why the hell had he agreed to that? Why had he listened to Taehyung? Nothing good ever happens when he does, so why this time should be any different? Not only had he been sacked, but right now, he had a bank credit with a high chance of being unable to pay it back.

Fantastic!

“Don’t listen to him, everything will be alright,” Taehyung added, as he stopped in his tracks in the middle of the pedestrian crossing. “Guys, I think I found us a place, it’s the firehouse like three blocks away from here. Should I call the real estate agent?” Taehyung announced, showing them the picture of the spacious place that would be undoubtedly perfect for them, undeniably large enough to accommodate all of their private stuff and allow them to run as many experiments as they wished.

“Isn’t it too soon?” Hoseok asked, yet Taehyung already walked away, dialing the number of the real estate agency. They had no time to waste; if they wished to have an income, they had to start working as soon as it was possible. Even Taehyung knew that, and his sense of business was quite limited (if not retarded).

“Nonsense,” Taehyung replied nonchalantly, as he strolled down the pavement. “Once we get the place, we’ll be needing a secretary and a car. Any volunteers?”

“I’ll take care of the process of recruitment,” Jin chipped in with a smile on his face, “what? It has always fascinated me how people react to problematical questions; it’s a fine opportunity to run a small experiment.”

“Okay, fine, just don’t be too weird, starting a business with a lawsuit is not quite promising,” Taehyung warned Jin as if it wasn’t the first time such a situation was about to occur. “So, Hoseok, why don’t you take care of a vehicle?”

“I’ll check if we can lease one, it will be cheaper,” Hoseok replied, and Taehyung nodded his head, although he had no clue what Hoseok meant by that.

“Then I think we’re all set,” Taehyung admitted, rubbing his hands together. They had lots of work ahead of them, and Taehyung just couldn’t wait to start working. Funnily enough, just right after they all had got sacked, he felt a newfound source of energy that he could only burn through hard work. The first breeze of freedom was so energizing and refreshing that Taehyung, although in the past hadn’t complained, finally felt alive, so at this point, he wondered why they hadn’t left the university sooner.

Apparently, the job hunt is a long and complicated process, my friend warned me. If you want somebody to reply to your application, you should at least send out twenty curriculum vitae, she preached, and I only rolled my eyes at her, brushing the pessimistic thought away.

Although I lacked experience being fresh off college, my qualifications weren’t that bad.

That’s precisely why I wasn’t that astonished when I got a reply the next morning, considering I had only applied for one position and at this point, it was about time to prove her wrong.

The aforementioned reply was short and simple; my potential employer wanted to meet up for an interview, writing down the address where I could find the company and the time when he was available for the meeting.

Three academic professors sought for a secretary slash accountant for their newfound business, and although the job proposition seemed as if they had no clue how to recruit employees, the monthly payment was quite handsome when compared to the other offers on the market.

Instead of thinking further, I opened the window to write a short reply in which I mentioned the estimated hour of my arrival and a note showing my gratitude for the chance they had given me.

The most challenging part of the recruitment was already behind me, and the job was almost mine. All I had to was to dress up and chill; going to the job interview fidgety was the worst thing a candidate could do. I was confident about my skills, and I wasn’t afraid to show my future boss the best side of my character.

Quickly, I ran around my studio apartment looking for my daintiest clothes. Whoever claimed the looks don’t matter during the job interview had to be a complete idiot; the first good impression is the key to success, and right now, I was determined to triumph.

By half past three in the afternoon I showed up. At first, I thought I was erroneous but then I checked the address for the second time, and there could be no mistake. The office was a part of the old firehouse, and I wondered how on Earth it hadn’t collapsed yet.

There was no doorbell–not a surprise!

I firmly knocked, but no one replied within two minutes, so I placed my hand on the knob and pushed the doors open since they weren’t locked. It wasn’t a surprise, either. The building looked like a ruin; even the worst burglar wouldn’t try to break into it.

“Hello? Is anyone here?” I hollered but my echo was the only reply I heard. Hesitantly, I entered the building, my eyes roaming around the hall. Dust covered every surface inside, a thick layer of grime lying on every item. “I’m here for the job interview!” I cleared my throat, speaking up a notch.

Just when I was about to turn around and leave, a man emerged from another room, a few binders in his hand, white, cotton coat thrown over his shoulders. Though he looked exhausted with huge bags under his eyes and messy hair, he was still incredibly handsome; he was tall and lean, and everything else a woman could want in a man.

“Who are you?” he asked, confused. Instantly, he turned to look at me, his eyebrow cocked up in a questioning manner, as he didn’t expect me here. “Wait, what time is it? Is it already three thirty? Oh shit, I’m sorry. I didn’t think you would come,” the guy spoke in a single breath, and I barely understood him. “I mean… hi, I’ve been expecting you,” he corrected himself, put the binders away and stretched his arm, offering me a handshake.

“Nice to meet you… Seokjin,” I smiled at him, as I read the nametag that was attached to his coat.

“Everybody calls me Jin, actually,” he announced, and I nodded in comprehension. “So you’re here for the job interview,” he trailed off, looking around the room as if seeking something. “Why don’t we sit there and you tell me why you want to work here, hmm?” he mentioned, showing me the way to the room which was also dirty but compared to the main hall, it was remotely cleaner.

“Of course,” I replied as I followed behind him.

Once we sat down, Jin placed his hands on a desk, entwining his fingers together, his eyes focused on my frame in front of him. With a gentle smile on his face, he studied my features almost as if he was going to recruit me based on my reactions and not my replies.

“So why do you want to work for us? Do you have any experience?” Jin asked, and I smiled at him, almost excited to answer his easy questions. Why do I want to have a job? Must be because I don’t like to live on the streets. Do I have any experience? Not really, but how difficult that job can be?

The moment when I was about to open my mouth and make up a reasonable response, someone came through the doors, making the both of us lose our focus. “Jin, I’m almost finished with the P.K.E. meter prototype. Can you have a look at it? I don’t understand why it shows 350 when I go upstairs.”

“Be careful with that!” Jin reprimanded the other guy, as he stood up and approached him, yanking the device out of the latter’s hands. “You know it’s fragile!” he added, and I bit my bottom lip, patiently waiting for them to finish so Jin and I could continue our interview. “Hmm… thanks, interesting, it looks fine. Have you run other tests?”

“Yeah, I looked around wearing Ecto-Goggles but in vain. Do you think we’re dealing with our first target here? What are the odds?” the man asked excitedly, finally realizing my presence. “Oh, I had no idea you had a guest.”

“We’re actually in the middle of the job interview,” Jin explained, and I nodded, confirming his words.

“Really? A job interview? But we had only one application,” the guy spoke, and Jin quickly elbowed his side to shut him up. Oh, so I was their only candidate… it was quite assuring. “I mean… I wish you luck on your job interview.”

“What was that about?” I asked pointing at the doors through which the intruder walked out.

“It was Hoseok, but don’t worry that pretty head of yours. Everything is alright; it’s just a small bump in the road, no biggie.” Jin explained, and although he tried to look sincere, I wasn’t buying it.  He seemed stiff, and he was stamping his foot on the floor as if he wanted to dash out to help Hoseok whatever the problem was. “Okay, so where were we?” Jin asked as he already forgot what we had been talking about.

“I haven’t got a chance to say anything before he barged in,” I stated truthfully, and Jin sent me an apologetic look for being so unprofessional about the job interview. “But to answer your previous questions, no, I don’t have any experience but I’m a business graduate, and I can get my mind wrapped around everything you want me to. Picking up the phone, accountancy, you name it!”

“Okay, you’re hired!” Jin hollered enthusiastically, “be here tomorrow by four o’clock. I’ll acquaint you with everything. I better go help Hoseok before he blows the whole place up.”

“You wanted to see me?” my friend asked as she walked inside of my studio apartment. “Oh, what’s the occasion?” she inquired with a cocked eyebrow the moment she noticed a bottle of cheap champagne in my hands.

“What can I say? I got the job,” I announced calmly, smiling at her in a victory. “In your face!” I screamed, fighting with the bottle, striving to open it.

“Really? I’m so happy for you,” Jennie cheered before she hugged me. “Okay, so tell me everything,” she urged as we sat down on the couch, pouring the champagne to slim glasses. “What is your boss like? Is he handsome?”

“Well… I don’t exactly know who’s the boss but I met two guys, and the both of them were ridiculously good-looking. The one who I had the job interview with was so my style; he was lean, and his shoulders were so broad. The other one was also attractive, he had such a warm smile, and I bet it can cure diseases!”

“Oh wow,” Jennie mused, downing her glass in one go, “but you’re not gonna date any of them, right? I mean… they’re your bosses; it’s kinda inappropriate.”

“I know, don’t worry,” I quickly agreed with her. Dating superiors or even co-workers wasn’t really my style. I had always thought that nothing good could stem from mixing private and business lives, so dating either of whom was obviously out of the question. “It’s not the way I roll anyway.”

“Yeah, I know,” Jennie nodded in understanding, “and now, tell me what their company does; their ad was pretty vague if you ask me.”

“Hmm… they are just as disorganized as the ad they posted online,” I stated truthfully, remembering the small incident which had happened during the job interview. “If they want to start making money, they really need my help.”

“That’s what happens when you start to run a business without knowing how to do that,” she commented, and I nodded in agreement. Having seen them, I knew that Jin and Hoseok had no clue how to wrap their minds around their business. Thankfully, they hired me, and I could show them how it’s done.

“Yeah, I’ll teach them a thing or two, but as for now, let’s celebrate!” I spoke as I refilled our glasses with more champagne. My shift didn’t start until four o’clock anyway.

As soon as I walked through the doors, I was met by Jin and Hoseok who were wearing worried expressions on their faces. “Hello?” I asked hesitantly and only smiled at me almost as if they were relieved about something.

“Hi, how are you feeling?” Jin asked me right away, while Hoseok stared at me, analyzing even the tiniest change in my behavior. “Have you been feeling nauseous or dizzy?” I shook my head firmly. “Or have you witnessed sudden changes in temperature or anything out of the ordinary?”

“No?” I answered unsurely, as I scrutinized their facial expressions with squinted eyes. What the hell was that about? Had they done something to me without me knowing? “Why?”

“Hmm… you see, we’ve been studying psychokinetic energy, and yesterday Hoseok discovered a faint trail of spook here but when he double-checked it was gone. And since psychokinetic energy doesn’t just disappear, we assumed it followed you.” Jin explained, but truthfully I didn’t understand anything what he tried to tell me. What psychokinetic energy?

“Okay… and now explain it to me, so I could comprehend it,” I asked, and Hoseok sighed.

“Jin is trying to say that there could be a ghost that right now is somehow attached to you,” Hoseok spoke, and the color of my face changed to a lighter shade even though I wasn’t the one to believe in ghosts. “And that’s weird because ghosts usually get attached to objects and not people.”

“What is it? Is it some kind of test that you want me to pass before you hire me because, trust me, it’s not funny.” I replied, not letting them fool me.

“Unfortunately not,” Jin spoke with a guilty smile, “do you mind if we run a couple control tests before we proceed with the initiation process? You know, just to be sure there isn’t any supernatural creature feeding off you.”

“And before you say anything,” Hoseok interjected, “ghosts are real.”

“Yeah, that’s true, and we’re literally this close to proving it to the rest of the world,” Jin added matter-of-factly, and I rolled my eyes, still unconvinced. “We’re like two days away from the breakthrough of the century.”

“I’m still skeptical about it, but I guess you can run a couple of tests if they’re not painful,” I replied, wanting to get this over with the quickest it was possible. Frankly, they were as freaky as they were good-looking, and I wouldn’t be surprised if they rejected my candidature because I refused to get examined.

“Oh no, they aren’t painful,” Hoseok reassured me, and Jin led me into another room where a lot of strange objects were scattered all over the wide wooden table. “Don’t worry it’ll take thirty minutes tops.”

“Yeah, and in the meantime, I’ll explain what we do here,” Jin added as he placed a helmet on my head. It was light and made of a thousand wires.

“I’m all ears,” I sighed, as I stole a glimpse of their computer that flared with colorful lights. Was it a good thing that it kept blinking like that?

“Okay, so we’re all parapsychology doctors, and a few days ago, our dean canceled our funds.” Jin started, and I nodded, registering the new information. I would never peg them for geniuses. “We’ve done some remarkable work regarding psychokinetic and nuclear energy, and after we got sacked, we decided to finish the work by ourselves.”

“According to our math, we’re a few days away from the greatest discovery of the century. If we’re right, we can actually find ghosts and capture them!” Hoseok finished, as he glued something to my temples.

“Hmm… so that’s what you do when I’m away,” a third voice chimed in, and I recognized it right away. It was low and raspy, and it could make every woman weak. It had definitely worked on me back in my college days.

Taehyung.

Hesitantly, I turned around, a bit afraid to look into his chocolate brown eyes. It was sudden and accidental, and judging by Taehyung’s expression, it was too soon. I had got over him, but he still seemed to loathe me with every fiber of his existence.

“What is she doing here?” Taehyung asked, and Jin and Hoseok exchanged confused looks, as they had no idea what had happened between Taehyung and I. It was understandable, our past ‘relationship’ wasn’t something I would brag either.

“What do you mean?” Jin asked, scratching his temple, trying to determine why Taehyung hated me so much. “She’s gonna work with us. Hopefully, with her help, we’ll make some profit,” he added, and if only a stare could kill, the three of us would already get burnt to ashes.

“I don’t think it’s a good idea,” Taehyung complained, trying to disguise the real reason why he didn’t want me there. I couldn’t blame him, though. I’d probably do the same thing. “She doesn’t match our style.”

“It doesn’t really matter, she was the only candidate,” Jin spoke matter-of-factly, and Taehyung bit his bottom lip before he spun on his heel and walked away.

“What was that about?” Hoseok inquired, curious about mine history with Taehyung.

“I think it’s a topic for another conversation,” I answered, hoping they would understand that I didn’t want to talk about it now. Taehyung was still sensitive, and I didn’t want to anger him any further by conceding everything to Jin and Hoseok. “Are you done with the tests?” I asked, changing the subject.

“Yeah, I think we are,” Hoseok spoke, his eyes focused on the computer, as he read the data that was unreadable to me. “But I think one of us should check your apartment. The P.K.E. meter is reading very close to 303, and it can mean a ghost is trailing behind you. It’s better to be safe than sorry, am I right?”

“Okay, whatever,” I replied with a shrug, relieved that the examination was finally over. “So what are we going to do now? Can we draw a contract?”

“Naturally,” Jin smiled at me, probably glad that everything I had witnessed didn’t scare me away by now. Though it was a bit odd, people do worse for money. I was only working as a secretary for three nut jobs.

“Show her around, and I will be waiting here,” Hoseok added politely, eager to analyze every piece of information he had managed to collect from the examination.

“Do you want to tell us what has happened between you and our new secretary?” Hoseok asked casually, trying to make him talk.

“There isn’t much to talk about,” Taehyung shrugged, trying not to show any sign of anger which was evident nonetheless. “We were dating back in college, but it didn’t work out.”

“It doesn’t sound like it,” Hoseok commented, having a hunch that Taehyung wasn’t telling him the entire truth. However, he knew it wasn’t the right time to push him further. Taehyung would concede when he was ready, and Hoseok could wait a bit more. “Is she the reason why you avoided every economic subject you could?”

“Maybe,” he answered shortly, more than unwilling to have that conversation. “Hoseok, do we really need her here? I can do the secretary work until we find someone else, it can’t be that difficult,” he offered, but Hoseok firmly shook his head.

“Nah, she’s great,” he spoke casually, “besides she’s already involved. Yesterday, when she came for the job interview, I detected P.K.E. that was gone when she left. Right now, we have a theory the ghost got attached to her. One of us has to check her apartment; do you want to do that?”

“Why would I want to do that?” Taehyung spat, folding his arms across his chest.

“You could try to put your differences aside and make this cooperation work,” Hoseok proposed, hoping it was possible despite their history. “It looks like she has got over you, so why can’t you do the same, huh?”

“It’s not like that,” Taehyung trailed off, trying to choose right words to describe his feelings. “I am over her, but I still hate her for what she did.”

“Okay, I can check her apartment if you don’t want to.”

“I’ve never said that,” Taehyung remarked, and Hoseok smirked, raising the employment contract. “Just give me that, you and Jin must finish the Proton Pack anyway.”

It was seven o’clock when I heard loud knocking on my doors. Regardless of whom it was, undoubtedly deserved some nagging for waking me up at such unholy hour. Hoseok had warned me that one of them would pay me a visit, but I didn’t expect it to happen to at least noon.

Rubbing my eyes, I got up and lazily approached the doors.

“Oh, it’s you, I didn’t expect you to come,” I spoke when I opened the doors and saw Taehyung in front of me. He still looked handsome, but definitely more mature than I remembered him.

“I always show up when there is a damsel in distress,” he said nonchalantly, as he waltzed into my apartment, not even waiting for me to invite him inside. Confidently, he strolled around the room, studying the interior. “Hmm… you haven’t changed that much. You’ve always hated tidying,” he chimed in, as he looked around my apartment.

“You haven’t changed, either. Barging in here like you own the place,” I snickered, as I folded my arms across my chest, leaning against the doorframe, watching his every move. “And though it’s too early to argue; who’s a damsel in distress? It’s obviously not me. I don’t need your saving.” I carried on, but Taehyung ignored me, not even humming in response. “I’ve already told Jin that no paranormal activity was present here.”

“You may want to take that back, sweetheart,” Taehyung said cockily, as he pulled out that blinking device and started to roam around the apartment. “You won’t be saying that when a ghost tries to eat that cute butt of yours,” he added, and I just rolled my eyes at his stupid remark; he had always loved my butt. “Hmm… it seems that Hoseok and Jin were right after all. I think you’ve got yourself a class V ghost over here.”

“Doubt it. Don’t you think I’d know if there was a ghost at my place, huh?” I replied, still not convinced. “Seriously, you guys have to chill,” I added, thinking they would drop the topic if I repeated it a couple of times more.

“Do you think we’re joking?” Taehyung asked rhetorically, and I once again rolled my eyes because it was impossible to reason with him. “We don’t. Class V ghosts are very hard to get rid of, and as long as we haven’t finished the Proton Pack, we can’t help you. It would be the best if you could stay at our HQ. We could prepare a room in which you could stay. Don’t get me wrong but if the ghost got attached to you, it could as well get attached to someone else.”

“So you’re trying to tell me that ghosts are something like paranormal STDs? Sorry, but I’m not buying that, Taehyung.” I concluded, and Taehyung didn’t seem the tiniest bit amused by my reasoning. “Thanks for your concern, but I think I’ll just stay here,” I repeated myself, and Taehyung pinched the bridge of his nose, almost as if he tried to refrain himself from snapping.

“Can you stop being so stubborn for once and listen to me? I’m serious,” Taehyung spoke in a raised voice, as he looked at me. His stare was intense, drilling holes in my head. Damn, he really meant that. “Have you noticed anything strange?”

“Define strange.”

“Well… anything out of the ordinary.” Taehyung stated vaguely, and I didn’t say anything, waiting for him to elaborate. “Hmm… that could be, for example, sudden surges of cold, extraordinary cravings, unwanted sinister presence, moving or levitating objects, strange odor, unexplainable electricity cuts, or anything of sorts?”

“Hmm… you’re the only unwanted sinister presence here,” I retorted, but once again he didn’t find it funny. “Sorry,” I apologized when my laughter died down a bit, “but seriously; nothing strange is happening here.”

“Then how are you going to explain this?” Taehyung spoke angrily, as he shoved the blinking device right in front of my face. “The P.K.E. meter is going crazy!”

“Okay, fine, I guess I can stay at Jennie’s for a few days,” I mumbled, being mad at myself for giving in; they were probably having the time of their lives seeing me comply with their crazy request. “For your peace of mind, not because I believe you.”

“You’ll thanks us later,” Taehyung admitted confidently, smirking at me.

“Once again, doubt it,” I repeated myself, hoping that my statement would brush that cocky smirk off his beautiful face. Unfortunately, none of this happened, his stance was still as nonchalant and confident.

“So… you’re seeing anybody?” Taehyung asked casually and plopped down on the couch, turning his head sideways as if he tried to spot any sign of man presence.

“I don’t see how any of it is your business,” I smiled warmly, trying to be as polite as I could master. It was a sensitive topic to me, and frankly, Taehyung was the last person I wanted to discuss that with.

“It’s called a friendly chit-chat,” Taehyung explained, and I rolled my eyes. “So… have you already found your Mr. Right?”

“You’re being a dick right now,” I said instead of answering his question. Despite our history, he was my boss now, and that kind of inquiry was inappropriate and should remain unanswered.

Unexpectedly, guys happened to be right about the ghost issue at my apartment; three days after Taehyung’s visit they showed up with ready Proton Packs, or whatever they call it, and got rid of the unwanted creature. Of course, I insisted on accompanying them, and they unwillingly complied with my request. I was glad they did because when I saw the ghost with my own eyes, I realized how thick-skinned I was to disbelieve them.

However, the fact that I believed them didn’t change much, as people still deceived us as con-artists. The first month was rough although I busted my ass off building the company image. They’re brilliant people, but they had no idea how to run a business.

Within that month I got promoted from the secretary position to being their full-time manager who also had one-fourth of the company shares, and since the business was partially mine, I couldn’t let it sink before it even got to sail.

Thanks to my knowledge and connections, I had almost got everything covered: an official website, local advertisement channels, and even the uniforms. None of these helped as much as our first task which happened to be a turning point for the business.

A famous four-star hotel’s manager called us saying they had an issue in the restaurant zone. Our reaction was fast; within an hour guys packed their equipment and drove there, wanting to examine the situation.

After successfully busting the ghost, our business bloomed.

“I got a call from Australia; they’re holding a seminar, and they want you to give a lecture on your recent development,” I told Jin as soon as he slid down the fire pole. “Are you going to participate or not?”

“You’re for real?” Jin asked, as he brushed the dust off his coat and approached my desk. Smiling, I nodded, and Jin looked at the counter as if trying to see the papers, making sure I wasn’t pulling a prank on him. “But if we go, then who will take care of the city? We get more calls every day.”

“We can split,” I proposed, and Jin glanced at me curiously. “You can teach me how to use the gear, and I will stay behind with someone, or I can go to Australia with one of you. I’m a part of the team, after all.”

“Hmm… I don’t know… it’s gonna be difficult to convince them to stay behind because I’m certainly going.” Jin spoke, and I giggled at his honest response. I couldn’t blame him, though. How could one reject a free Australia trip offer?

“Discuss it with the guys, and let me know what you’ve come up with,” I replied sincerely, as I gazed at Jin. I admit it’d be great to go on a free trip. However, I wasn’t going to intrude if they wanted to go. After all, the scientists from all over the world wanted to meet with them because of their breakthrough in the parapsychological field.

“What are you two plotting?” Taehyung walked inside through the main doors, catching me and Jin off guard. Immediately, Jin leaned back, and spun on his heel, greeting Taehyung with a broad smile which he often used when he did something he shouldn’t have. It was strange because we didn’t do anything inappropriate.

“Nothing,” Jin answered dismissively and smiled at me, letting Taehyung know right away that we were up to something. “We were just talking, but I have a surprise for you and Hoseok,” he announced, and Taehyung cocked his eyebrow suspiciously.

“What’s going on?”

“I’ll explain everything later.”

“Okay, so tell us…what happened between you and Taehyung?” Hoseok asked straightforwardly, taking advantage of Taehyung’s absence. Taehyung was out to take care of some business that none of us dared to question, while the three of us was sitting around the table, unpacking the Styrofoam boxes full of palatable, steaming, Italian food.

“Yeah, what exactly happened? Taehyung mentioned that you two were dating, but he didn’t go into details.” Jin added matter-of-factly, as he distributed the napkins and plastic cutlery among us. “So…do you mind to elaborate?”

“There’s nothing to tell,” I stated casually, being focused on the box in front of me, my mouth watering when the delicious smell hit my nostrils. “We fooled around in college, but I wouldn’t call it dating. We were more like friends with benefits rather than lovers.”

“And I’m assuming you were the one to break things off. Am I right?” Jin guessed, and I heaved a sigh since the matter was much more difficult. It was safe to say that the blame had been lying on both sides of the conflict.

“You seem way cooler than Taehyung about it, so you had to be the one to break up with him.” Hoseok agreed with Jin, giving him a high-five.

“We weren’t an item, so it’s quite difficult to talk about a break-up.” I started before I stuffed my mouth with food. “I was going abroad for one semester, and Taehyung wasn’t happy about it. He didn’t want me to go, but I didn’t listen to him. And when I returned Taehyung had already graduated, so we never had a chance to talk about it. I thought he’s moved on, but apparently, I was wrong.”

My sincere confession got them speechless; neither of whom knew how to react to it, and I couldn’t blame them for the awkwardness that stemmed from it.

“Okay, so changing the subject; have you guys figured out what you want to do about that seminar? As far as I recall, I have to give them a reply by next Friday.” I said, knowing that it was the only way to dodge the unpleasant topic.

“You have no idea how much we fought about it,” Hoseok started with a cheeky smile, stabbing his food with a plastic knife, being probably already full.

“But we’ve come to an agreement,” Jin continued, pushing his half-empty box aside, giving me his undivided attention. “Generally, all of us want to go, and among of us Taehyung is the best public speaker,” Jin announced, and I nodded, understanding their way of thinking.

“But then again, he doesn’t trust either one of us to stay here with you alone,” Hoseok interjected, making me roll my eyes. It’s so typical of Taehyung; getting jealous without any cogent reason to. “Whatever that means.”

“Yeah, and furthermore, he doesn’t want to train you saying it would be too dangerous for you to deal with all the equipment which is complete bullshit because it’s not that difficult.”

“Jin’s right; you have to remember five ground rules and everything should be fine,” Hoseok added, backing up Jin’s statement. “I have no idea what’s happening under Taehyung’s skull, but I’ve never seen him being so overprotective.”

“Okay, stop. You’re confusing me. Can you just tell me who is going and who is staying here?” I asked, growing annoyed, as they didn’t let me get a word in the edgeways.

“Hoseok and I are going, but don’t worry; we’re gonna bring you a lot of gifts.” Jin declared quickly, and I sighed in relief. Drowning in uncertainty was the worst option; I’d rather know now, so I could mentally brace myself to spend the weekend with Taehyung.

“Actually, we already have a gift for you, just finish your dinner,” Hoseok added enthusiastically, smiling at me in a way that if I didn’t know him, I’d consider creepy.

“I think I’m done,” I quickly replied, as I pushed my box aside. I was already full, and I didn’t want to force myself to finish it, although it was absolutely delectable. I’d probably heat it up for supper. “Where is my gift?” I inquired when I wiped my mouth.

“She’s gonna love it,” Jin said casually, and Hoseok nodded his head, agreeing with the former. At this point, I had no idea what they were getting me, and I wasn’t sure whether I should be ecstatic or terrified.

“Just wait here, I’ll get it,” Hoseok proposed, and marched out of the room.

“What is it?” I questioned further in anticipation; it had to be something special if they were so excited about my reaction. Unfortunately, Jin’s lips were sealed, and no matter what I tried to open them, they remained airtight, spilling no secrets. “You’re no fun.”

“Oh, shut up!” Jin whined loudly, and I giggled because the look on his face was priceless.

Before I managed to anger Jin any further, Hoseok returned with a medium-sized, pink box in his hands. Now, I was intrigued. It definitely wasn’t an envelope with a plane ticket.

Carefully, Hoseok placed the box on my lap, urging me to unwrap the present, “come on, open up!” Smiling, they stared at me, almost giving me chills.

Slowly, I untied the ribbon, whereas Hoseok tapped his foot impatiently.

“Jesus Christ, hurry up,” Jin chipped in, prompting me to hasten.

Shaking my head, I opened the box and looked inside, its content getting me speechless. It was one of the Ghostbusters uniforms, only one shade more pink with my name written on the badge with silver and hot pink threads. I knew they considered me a part of the team, but right now, I was holding the evidence of membership in my hands.

“Guys, I love it,” I admitted from the bottom of my heart before I jumped off the chair and hugged them tightly. “Do you want me to try it on?” I asked once I broke the embrace.

“Naturally, but don’t be too eager, we also have a Proton Pack for you, and that damn thing is pretty weighty,” Hoseok warned me, but I just shrugged; they run around with Proton Packs all the time, it couldn’t be that bad as they wanted me to believe.

“You’re officially one of us,” Jin stated matter-of-factly, as he ruffled my hair, making me glare at him. That’s going too far! We were friends, but touching my hair was way too much.

“Don’t fuck it up.” Hoseok threatened me with his finger, sounding like a completely different person. “Taehyung is gonna kill us if anything happens to you.”

“If you know how to operate the machines, it’s obvious I can do that, too.” I snickered playfully, and Jin and Hoseok frowned, not finding it the tiniest bit funny.

The next day after Jin and Hoseok’s departure was peaceful compared to our standards; we only had three customers, while typically we were handling at least half a dozen. The first mission wasn’t scheduled until 4 p.m., yet I decided to show up at the office a bit early in hopes of catching up with the paperwork.

As always, it was dull, but no one would do it for me, so I had to suck it up.

“Hmm…I didn’t expect you to be here so early,” a voice mused from behind my back, and I quickly turned around in shock. “Oh, have you forgotten to put on a skirt?” Taehyung sneered, as he glanced at me from head to toe.

“Excuse you, but my skirt is where it should be. It’s pretty modest if you ask me.” I couldn’t let his comments get to me. At this point, I could consider his snarky remarks as sexual harassment; we were in the confines of work, and there was an ethic that he ought to follow. “And what are you doing here? I thought I wouldn’t see you until the first appointment.”

“You seriously think I’m gonna let you out there without proper training?!” Taehyung gasped, and I rolled my eyes. Jin and Hoseok had already shown me what I should know, so Taehyung’s additional guidance was superfluous. “You’re not leaving the firehouse until I tell you, you’re ready,” he added, as he took a few, slow steps towards me.

“Why are you doing this?” I inquired quietly, and Taehyung just smirked at me, as if he was surprised that I didn’t know his motive.

“Isn’t it obvious? I care about you; I don’t want you to get hurt.” Taehyung spoke in a firm tone, so unlike him. His eyes gleamed with sincerity, making it unable to tear my gaze away. With one single look, he had me enchanted. Only a few sweet words came out of his mouth, and I held my breath, my heart skipping a beat.

Right now, when we were alone, and no one could disturb us, he didn’t act like a brat. I felt as if we were back in college, carefree and so saccharine. He no longer was a man who tried to make me feel bad about my past choices, but he actually cared about my well-being.

It was a delightful change after countless arguments we had over the previous month.

“What? You look like as if you’ve seen a ghost. Is my care so surprising?” Taehyung joked, and I almost burst out laughing at his lame pun. Thankfully, I refrained myself from doing so.

“As a matter of fact, yes.” Yesterday, he had acted as if he wished for my ass to get eaten by a ghost, so what was different today? “I thought you hated me.”

“I could never,” Taehyung quickly admitted, smiling sheepishly.

Okay, what the hell is happening?

His sudden confession got me speechless. I didn’t expect him to concede to me. Who the hell was he, and where did the real Taehyung go?

“Well…if that’s what you really feel, I gotta admit you’re sending mixed signals.” I spoke truthfully, making Taehyung roll his eyes on me. Perhaps, I was nitpicking, but Taehyung was unbearable for the past month, and I couldn’t let it slide after a couple of sweet words. No, I remembered how coldly he had treated me, and if he wanted me to change my mind about him, he had to work hard for it.

“I admit I have never been good at romance,” said Taehyung, and I giggled when his words rang in my ears. Was he serious? Did he just call it ‘romance’? What romance?

“You can’t be serious,” I replied, pinching the bridge of my nose. So what now? Did he want to start over? With me? It didn’t make any sense! We had never even been a couple! “Okay, let’s get back to some real problems. What do I have to do to convince you that I’m ready to be one of the Ghostbusters?”

“Stubborn as always,” Taehyung commented under his breath, as he strolled toward me, sitting at the edge of my desk, holding my dangling hand. His grip was gentle, his skin was smooth, and at first, I wanted to yank my hand back. He was trying to mess with my head, but I was ready to prove that he didn’t have the effect that had used to work on me. I was stronger and smarter, and he couldn’t charm me as easily.

“So what is it that I have to know?” I urged him, and he slowly looked into my eyes, biting his bottom lip, swaying our entwined hands from side to side.

Whatever he had in mind to use on me was bound to fail. Right now, I focused on my career, and boyfriend drama (if he even sought a relationship) was the least of my worries.

“Where should I begin?”

Having sat through a two-hour long lecture (which pretty much helped me realize why they had got fired from the university and doubled everything Jin and Hoseok had told me before their departure), Taehyung let me pick up the equipment what I did with a roll of my eyes. Taehyung thought I had no clue how to operate the gear, but he was wrong; Jin and Hoseok had already shown me everything that I should have known.

Hesitantly, Taehyung let me tag along with him.

First two assignments happened to be false alarms; we arrived, and then Taehyung diagnosed the situation with the P.K.E. meter and Ecto-Goggles. I was relieved our customers weren’t in danger, but on the other hand, we weren’t earning money, and we were barely making both ends meet with the regular service. (The diagnosis fee constituted about 5% of actual ghost-busting service, and we probably wouldn’t live off it.)

“Thank God, you’re finally here,” a middle-aged woman ran out of the building and threw herself in Taehyung’s arm like a damsel in distress, even though he didn’t perceive her as one. “I was so scared,” she added, as she rubbed her cheek against Taehyung’s chest. He didn’t seem pleased with her behavior, but he was too well-bred that he didn’t try to push her off him right away.

“Calm down, what’s going on?” Taehyung asked worriedly, as he placed his large hands on her shoulders, making her face him. She looked terrified. “Everything’s under control now, but you have to tell us what’s going on,” Taehyung explained, and looked at me, the woman only noticing my presence when she followed Taehyung’s gaze.

“There’s a ghost on the tenth floor!” She shouted, turning around, raising her arm, pointing at the hotel behind her. “I’ve seen it! It was green, and it almost ate the cleaning trolley!” Taehyung furrowed his eyebrows, and I knew that something was up.

“Okay, please, stay here, and we’ll look around,” Taehyung spoke calmly.

Having sighed, I walked inside right after Taehyung.

“What was that look about?” I inquired, once we were climbing the stairs. The elevator was out of order, and we had to take the stairs. The Proton Pack felt twice as heavy, almost making me fall backward.

“What look?” Without turning to me, Taehyung asked, pretending to be clueless. Did he forget that we’ve known each other inside out, and I could tell straight away that something was off? Maybe, he could fool that woman, but not me.

“Don’t play coy,” I stated, as I took a short break to catch my breath. “Is there something you’re not telling me?”

Abruptly, Taehyung stopped, and I was thankful that I wasn’t standing right behind him.

“It’s about what she said.” He started vaguely, and I didn’t say anything, waiting for him to elaborate. I knew how to use the equipment, but I had no idea how to identify the threat. Were we to deal with a powerful being? Was he scared? What was going on?

“And what did she say exactly?”

“I just have a bad feeling, okay?” Taehyung continued, though hesitantly. “But whatever happens there, I want you to stay behind, and leave everything to me. I can handle it myself.”

“Sure,” I replied, even when I didn’t really mean it. If Taehyung needed my help, I’d intervene in a heartbeat. It was foolish of him if he really thought I’d listen to him.

When we reached the tenth floor, my legs almost gave in under the gravity and the weight of the Proton Pack. I placed my hands on my knees and leaned in, trying to catch a breath. If we had to go any higher, I’d probably faint. Taehyung seemed in a better condition than I, but I still could hear him panting.

Pushing his fringe off his eyes, Taehyung pulled out the P.K.E. meter, and I looked at the device, trying to peek what kind of ghost we were to deal with.

“What does it mean?” I asked, when the P.K.E. meter showed 432, and I had no idea how to interpret the reading. Slowly, Taehyung turned toward me, his face a shade paler.

“It’s not as bad as it could get, but it could be easier,” Taehyung started, and I exhaled in relief. Before he spoke, I had no idea I was holding my breath. “We’re not dealing with a Biblical Proportions here, but I think it’s a class V apparition, and if there’s anything you should know, ghosts with a reading like this should not be easy to get rid of.”

“Okay…” I whispered, now doubting my qualifications. Not that I’d like to return to my desk and answer phone calls, but it would be better if my first real ghost-busting mission was simple.

“Get ready, the ghost can attack us anytime,” Taehyung mentioned, and I nodded my head, placing my hand on the Particle Thrower. “And remember what I’ve told you, never ever cross the streams.”

“How could I forget it? You guys use that line literally every day,” I muttered under my breath, and rolled my eyes, slightly lightening up the situation. Humor always works when there’s thick and uncomfortable tension, so why this time should be any different? “Maybe you should get it tattooed?”

“Ha-ha, very funny,” Taehyung laughed dryly, his eyes roaming around the corridor, being ready for the ghost to appear. Frankly, he looked handsome, so focused and professional.

“Can you tell me more about class V ghosts? Is it as bad as you make it look like?” I asked curiously, and Taehyung looked over his shoulder as if he was shocked I didn’t read Jin’s book about ghost classification system, CDI system for short.

“Maybe, you should wait in the car,” Taehyung stated, as he shook his head in disbelief that he actually let a newbie work with him. “I can handle it myself.”

“Don’t tell me if you don’t want to. Geez!” I retorted, and sighed, looking around, pretending I didn’t ask him that question. Maybe I should listen to him and let him do everything by himself if he really didn’t want my help.

“Class V ghosts are Ectoplasmic manifestations of definite but non-human form. They are formed from emotionally-charged events or as side effects from ritual summoning. And we need a shit tone of proton pack implementation to eradicate it.” Taehyung recited, and I nodded in comprehension, as I tried to remember as much information as I could.

“Do you hear that?” I asked when I heard a strange sound, familiar to chewing. The hotel’s owner had said that people had got evacuated, so what the hell was that?

“Stay back,” Taehyung mentioned before he moved forward, following the odd noise. Slowly, I copied his movements, the Particle Thrower in my grip. “Oh shit,” Taehyung cursed, as he looked around the corner, spotting the ghosts. Taehyung seemed scared, so I peeked, curiosity getting the better of me.

Behind the corner was a green, levitating ghost who was in the middle of its meal; with big, yellow teeth it was eating a cake, the chewed bites falling onto the ground, making the mess around it. Slowly, its fetor hit my nostrils, and I immediately covered my face in disgust.

“Ew! What the hell is that?” I asked, and Taehyung chuckled at my reaction.

“A ghost, really nasty one at that,” Taehyung mused, but I didn’t find it funny. “And apparently, it eats anything that’s not nailed down or on fire,” he added, when he took a glimpse of the green creature, which right now was consuming the metal tray where the cake used to be.

“Okay, so what’s the plan? A penny for your thoughts,” I questioned, waiting for him to explain our next move. We couldn’t just jump from behind the corner and shoot the ghost with the Particle Thrower.

Casually, Taehyung pulled out his phone and snapped a photo. Strangely enough, the ghost got caught on the snapshot, which was a rare occurrence. We stared attentively at the picture on Taehyung’s phone, not recognizing the moment when the ghost stopped chewing the cake. When I mentioned that fact, the green cloud of electrons, neutrons, and ectoplasm seeped through the wall and my body, leaving a very unpleasant taste on my tongue. The feeling was eerie, and I was on the verge of vomiting.

“Are you alright?” Taehyung asked me, although his eyes focused on the ghost behind me. I nodded my head, though it wasn’t an entire truth. “On the count of three, you’ll drop to your knees, okay?” He ordered as he reached for the Particle Thrower, ready to attack.

Slowly, Taehyung counted to three in a half-whisper, and I bent, sinking to my knees in front of Taehyung. When I was out of the stream range, Taehyung turned on the Proton Pack which immediately produced a bright, powerful stream of particles. He didn’t catch the ghost, though. It disappeared behind the wall.

“Get the Ghost Trap ready,” Taehyung mentioned, as he used the card key, and we entered the nearest room. “When I confine the ghost, you have to roll the trap under it, and stomp on the pedal, you got it?”

“Sure,” I confirmed, as I reached for the Ghost Trap.

“It’s fully charged, right?” Taehyung asked, and I nodded since I had made sure the battery was on 100% before we left the firehouse. Jin and Hoseok had told me the Ghost Trap could malfunction if not charged fully, and I wasn’t going to make that neophyte mistake. “And remember not to look into the trap. A glimpse can cause serious eye damage or even blindness, and we don’t want anything bad to happen to your pretty eyes.”

“Don’t worry, I know how to use it,” I replied, trying to ignore the weird compliment.

“Come out, Stinky!” Taehyung yelled as if he was some kind of ghosts-whisperer. “I have one delicious snack for you.” He shouted loudly to no one in particular, and I giggled, finding the scene happening in front of me ridiculous.

Taehyung and I exchanged glances, but he quickly ripped his gaze away when the similar fetor pervaded the room, boding the presence of a paranormal being. Once again, Taehyung turned on the Proton Pack, aiming at the source of the odor. Before the stream hit the ghost, the orange light burnt everything within its reach.

“What are you doing it? Catch him,” I urged Taehyung before he destroyed the room. The ghost was flying around the room, and he couldn’t capture him with the stream, looking like a newbie.

“I’m trying!” Taehyung defended himself, but I only rolled my eyes, and placed my hand on the Particle Thrower, wondering if I should help Taehyung. I was about to operate the Ghost Trap, but it’s pretty useless when the ghost’s on the loose.

Sighing, I pulled the Particle Thrower and aimed. For a brief second, Taehyung looked at me, fear visible in his eyes. He didn’t trust me with it, and I couldn’t blame him; it was a dangerous weapon, after all. Maybe it was reckless, but Taehyung wasn’t effective on his own, so I had to intervene.

When I pressed the button, the Proton-Gun generated raw nuclear energy which hit the ghost, making me stumble backward.

“What the fuck are you doing?!” Taehyung yelled at me when he turned off his Proton Pack. The consequence of crossing the streams is so great that he didn’t want to risk it, especially when such an inexperienced person as me was using it. “Turn it off!” he screamed, but I ignored him, since the ghost was already captured, almost nullified by now. He had to be joking.

“Get the Ghost Trap ready,” I mentioned, as I gently kicked it toward him. The ghost was trying to wiggle out of the lasso of a positronic ionized stream of proton energy, but I firmly clenched the Particle Thrower in my hands, using 100% of its power.

“This is the first and last time I let you tag along!” Taehyung shouted, but prepared the Ghost Trap nonetheless. Skillfully, he untangled the wires and rolled the small device toward the ghost. “When I turn it on you gotta shut the Proton Pack down, you got it?”

“Yep,” I nodded quickly.

“On the count of three,” Taehyung exclaimed, and I focused deeply, trying to synchronize with him. When the last syllable rolled off his tongue, I took my finger off the trigger. Panting, I stared at the ghost who was being slowly consumed by the electromagnetic field. “Don’t look into the trap!” He yelled, but I was too engrossed in the scene in front of me.

“What?” I asked, not tearing my gaze away. You could see the ghost getting drawn into the trap, piece by piece utilized inside the small Ecto Containment Unit.

“Don’t fucking look into the trap!” Taehyung yelled again, this time much louder, and when I didn’t listen to him right away, he yanked me toward him, letting me fall into his chest, as he placed his hand on the back of my head, pulling me closer, pressing me against his frame. “You must start listening. You could lose your sight.” Taehyung warmed me, but he didn’t sound mad. If anything, I detected care and relief.

“Sorry,” I spoke, when I looked up at him, admiring his face from up close. With his arms wrapped around me, I could feel warmth emitting from him. Being in his embrace felt comfortable and secure, and although we had never put much attention to none sexual type of affection, I realized how much we had missed out on. “I won’t do that again.”

“Of course, you don’t,” Taehyung replied coldly, taking a step backward as if he grasped our interaction was inappropriate. “It was the last time I brought you with me. Do you have any idea how reckless that was?”

“Sorry, I wasn’t thinking,” I admitted, and Taehyung rolled his eyes at me.

Taehyung was silent during our ride back to the headquarters; he was reading something on his phone, whereas I was listening to the news flash on the radio, maneuvering the vehicle. The night was tranquil; the sky was in a beautiful shade of navy, even a couple of stars seen over the horizon. The scenery was breathtaking, but I couldn’t enjoy it as much as I wished since the recent dispute with Taehyung kept surfacing when I tried to focus on something, anything else.

When I stopped upon seeing the red light, my phone rang. Quickly, I reached into the glove compartment and pulled out the Bluetooth earpiece, putting it into my right ear.

“Hello?” I asked as soon as I answered the call. On the other end of the line, I heard a lot of background noise before Jin’s soft voice greeted me excitedly. “Oh, hi, what’s up?” I inquired, wondering what he wanted from me. If I were on a seminar abroad, calling home would be the last position on my priorities’ list.

“I’m just checking up on you,” Jin casually stated, and I smiled at the thought of Jin and Hoseok calling me to find out if Taehyung and I had already jumped at each other’s throats. “How is work with Taehyung? Is he a pain in the ass?”

“Hmm…I’d say bearable,” I replied unsurely. Taehyung had been nice, but then I had done something he hadn’t wanted me to, and then everything had gone downhill. I could use Jin to vent about Taehyung, but they were on a trip, and I couldn’t ruin it for them. “And what about you? Are you having fun?” I asked, changing the subject. Our conversation would be way more enjoyable if we changed the direction it was going; I’d much rather discuss their trip than another round of a passionate dispute between Taehyung and I.

“It’s a paradise. You can check out Hoseok’s Instagram updates. It’s nothing compared to the real feel, though. I wished you were here with us.” Jin simply said, and I smiled again, imagining what I’m missing out on.

“I wished I was with you, too,” I confessed genuinely, realizing that Taehyung’s eyes were on me, as he tried to decipher whom I was talking to. “But it’s okay; we’ll have more opportunities in the future, right?”

“Obviously,” Jin agreed swiftly, “we’re handing out our business cards just like you told us to. I think we’ll soon make it big.” He added, and I smiled brightly, not even trying to disguise how proud I was. “I gotta go now. Hoseok’s coming with our drinks. Talk to you later.”

“Don’t have too much fun without me.” I chimed in playfully, “and try not to miss me.”

“Who was that?” Taehyung asked, as soon as I hung up. Hesitantly, I looked at him upon seeing his upset cast.

“Jin, obviously. Who else?” I spoke, rolling my eyes. “He wanted to say hi, that’s all. Why?”

“Are you two screwing?” Taehyung accused, and I chucked. How the hell did he come up with it? It was a casual conversation without even a slimmer of flirtation, so it was bizarre how he read into that. I shook my head in denial, but Taehyung didn’t seem convinced. “It didn’t sound like it.”

“I mean…Jin’s handsome, I agree. Don’t worry, I know better than dating my co-workers. It’s strictly business,” I explained, but once again, Taehyung didn’t seem pleased with my response. “We’re friends, of course, but nothing more.”

Taehyung didn’t reply. He just nodded in acknowledgment and looked away, focusing on his phone again. Whatever he was seeking, it was more important than telling me why he had thrown all his accusations toward me. I wasn’t dating Jin, but it was none of his business, so why bothered asking?

Thankfully, we were almost on our driveway. I couldn’t wait to exit the car, change out of the Ghostbusters uniform and come back home. I had spent way too much time with Taehyung today, and I wished I could relax somewhere far away from him.

Taehyung was the first one to get out of the vehicle, and I followed right behind him.

“Thank you, Tae,” I spoke, and Taehyung stopped in his trucks, yet not turning around to face me. Maybe it’d be easier for me to admit to my fault if I didn’t have to look into his sharp eyes. “I know you told me not to look, and I’m sorry for ignoring your warnings. You said it’s my last mission, and I’m gonna respect your decision. Today was fun by the way.” I voiced my thoughts from the bottom of my heart, and I hoped Taehyung could feel the genuineness in my words.

Once again, Taehyung remained silent, completely ignoring my veracity. I couldn’t blame him; he was still mad at me, and a couple of kind words didn’t have the power to outweigh the consequences of my previous actions. He felt wronged, and if I were in his shoes, I wouldn’t get over it so quickly, either.

Slowly, I strolled toward him.

“I have no idea what could happen to me if we crossed the streams or stared longer into the trap, but I’m glad you kept me safe,” I added with a bittersweet smile on my face. Taehyung hated me, yet he had proven to be a bigger person who helped me notwithstanding our past discord.

Taehyung turned around, staring down at me. He didn’t say a word, yet his eyes were drilling holes in mine, the conveyed message as lucid. Right now, his anger was agitated with ease and solicitude.

“I’m truly thankful,” I mentioned honestly, smiling weakly at him. In the heat of the moment, I got on my toes, leaning to place a chaste peck on his lips. The kiss lasted a second tops, and when I pulled back, Taehyung grabbed my arm and yanked me back.

“You can’t walk away after what you’ve just done,” Taehyung spoke quietly, his eyes sparkling, searching mine. “You’re annoying, reckless, and irresponsible. Do you know that?” He added, and when I opened my mouth to answer his rhetorical question, he beat me to it, pressing his soft lips against mine, initiating another simple kiss.

We shouldn’t be doing it, but when his lips were on mine, and his hands holding me close, I couldn’t think straight, let alone push him away. His body emitted the familiar warmth, and with each passing second, I was becoming cozier and cozier.

Gradually, he tilted his head to the side, deepening the kiss, sucking on my bottom lip excitedly until I let out a hushed moan. It had been a while since I made out with anyone, and God, how much had I missed affection. And the fact of Taehyung being an excellent kisser didn’t help my situation, at all.

I ought to have fought with the temptation, but after a minute in Taehyung’s arms, I didn’t even want to. Despite the loud protests of my consciousness, I gave into the fascination, as I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him closer. It didn’t make any sense, but I craved his intimacy.

“Did you mean it?” Taehyung asked as he withdrew a couple of centimeters to voice his doubts. His breath tickled my wet lips, as he waited for my reply. “You know…about dating your co-workers.”

“Yes,” I admitted, and when my response rang in his ears, Taehyung quickly dropped his hands, which were holding my cheeks. With a disappointed sigh, he looked down at his feet. “I’ve never treated you like a co-worker, though,” I stated firmly, entwining my fingers with his. “You’ve always been something more, Taehyung,” I confessed, and Taehyung immediately lit up, smashing his lips against mine, his hands landing on my bottom, as he jerked me toward him.

“That’s all I need to know,” Taehyung whispered, barely lifting his lips off of mine. “Baby, I missed you so much,” he confessed, as he squeezed my left ass-cheek playfully. “It was a torture to see you every day and being unable to do anything.”

“Shut the hell up,” I murmured with a wide smile on my face, as I brushed my nose against his fondly before I sealed our lips together in a gentle, synchronized smooch. “Haven’t you heard that actions speak louder than words?” I remarked, rubbing my body against him, catching him off guard.

“We shouldn’t,” Taehyung breathed out, as he rested his forehead on mine, his eyes shut close.

“We shouldn’t do a lot of stuff,” I agreed with him casually, a smirk decorating my face when I ran my hand across his chest and shoulders. “It has never stopped us before, though,” I added, as I nipped his earlobe mischievously.

“You can’t talk to me like that!” Taehyung spoke loudly, taking a small step backward before he pulled down my uniform’s zipper. “You haven’t had clothes underneath that the whole time?” he questioned, although he already knew the answer. “Tsk, tsk,” he shook his head, pushing the uniform off my shoulders, letting it pool around my feet.

“Don’t stare at me like that! You’re creeping me out right now,” I whined, as I kicked off my shoes and discarded the bothersome uniform. His lingering stare was flattering, but when he didn’t put those large hands in action, I felt a little under-pampered.

Standing almost bare in front of him, I trembled, what didn’t go unnoticed by Taehyung. Instantly, he wrapped his arms around my waist, the heat radiating off him. “Maybe we should talk first,” Taehyung proposed but gulped when I touched his groin. “Okay, I tried.”

Abruptly, Taehyung picked me up and carried me to the break room. We had no time to waste, and he lastly understood that too. During our work together, we had been playing cat and mouse, but it was about time to bury the hatchet. We’re finally on the same team after years of the matchup.

“I wonder if you’re as sweet as you used to be,” Taehyung spoke, as he gently placed me down and got on his knees. “Your pussy was as sweet as your mouth was bitter,” he added before his long, slender fingers tugged my panties to the side, allowing him to touch my bare folds.

“Taehyung–

I moaned his name, as I squeezed my legs together when he started to touch my slit, making him smirk. Gently, he leaned forward and pressed his lips on my skin, drawing a trail of delicate pecks across my left thigh.

“It’s been a while since anyone treasured you the way you deserve it,” Taehyung concluded, his breath tickling my skin. “Let me remind you,” he added, and I leaned my back against the wall, knowing my legs wouldn’t be able to support my weight if Taehyung was to keep his promise. He had always known how to make me weak, and right now, I was sure he didn’t forget his moves.

“Please,” I breathed out, tilting my head backward when Taehyung’s fingers massaged my folds, his mouth already on my pelvis, slowly kissing his way down to my clit. “Oh God,” I shuddered, quickly reaching out to hold myself onto something.

“I’m seriously concerned, it has always taken forever for you to come,” Taehyung commented playfully, looking up at me. “And look at you right now, almost squirting on my fingers,” he added, and I bit my bottom lip, too embarrassed to admit how long it had been.

“Tae, please,” I begged when Taehyung pushed his long finger inside of me, his tongue teasing my clit, making me hold my breath, my teeth clenched. “Fuck,” I moaned; he added another finger, as he pumped in and out mercilessly, his mouth now sucking my most sensitive nub.

“Do you like it?” Taehyung pulled away to ask, but I only ran my hand through his hair, forcing him to return to eating me out. “You’ve always been needy,” he commented, as his free hand groped my bottom, squeezing it, making me jerk my hips forward.

“And you’ve never let me come without me begging,” I made a remark, but Taehyung only smirked. Lazily, he flicked his tongue what induced my legs to shake when he found the right spot, allowing me to feel very first sparks of pleasure.

“You know me too well,” Taehyung teased, and I rolled my eyes, not expecting him to take me any other way. I didn’t mind it, though. He was a pain in the ass, but he had always put my needs above his, making sure I was the first one to reach the blissful peak. Moreover, sex with him had never been monotonous, as he had tended to come with something new each time we were intimate.

“Mmm…” I purred through clenched teeth, when Taehyung’s fingers pumped inside of me swiftly, stretching me before he fucks me properly with his cock. “Taehyung…” his name rolled off my tongue, and I knew how much my cries of excitement kept him going.

“What is it, baby?” he asked, as he looked at me. His eyes were shining with its unwavering spark, his reddened lips glistening with his saliva and my juices. “Do you want me to stop?” I looked at him, my eyes hooded, observing his infamous smirk of pride.

“What do you think?” I dismissed his question, breathing heavily. His ministrations turned me on, making me a complete mess under the power of his touch, though I wasn’t going to admit that and stroke his ego anymore. It was already big, and I barely could handle his cocky attitude.

“I don’t know, you tell me,” he spoke as he licked his lips, humming in delight. “God, you’re delicious, as always.”

“Please, Taehyung, touch me, I missed your fingers,” I whined much to Taehyung’s enjoyment. He knew how he made me feel, and he shamelessly used it to his advantage. “I bet you can make me come around them,” I challenged him, and his eyes brightened with confidence.

“If you keep talking like that, I may not be able to control myself any longer,” Taehyung confessed, and I realized he was aching for my affection too. He was on his knees, caressing me as if I was made of china, fulfilling my every wish, whereas I didn’t even touch him yet. Still, in his uniform, his cock was restrained underneath a thick layer of clothing.

“Let me take care of you, Tae,” I whispered when I brushed my hand against his cheek. Instantly, he looked me in the eyes, slowly standing up, his gaze focused on my lips. “Please,” I started when I reached to his zipper, pulling it down. Unlike me, he wore regular clothes under the uniform. It wasn’t problematic, though. With my help, we quickly got rid of the annoying fabric.

“Look what you do to me,” said Taehyung when I pulled down his boxers, releasing his hard cock. Gently, he grabbed his length and gave it a couple of strokes. I had seen him jerk off million times before, but when I observed him right now, it turned me on as much as when he had his fingers shoved inside of me. “Help me,” he whispered, as he reached out for my hand, guiding it to his cock.

Smirking, I grabbed his member around its base, caressing it annoyingly slowly, knowing he favored going fast. Usually, I wouldn’t tease him like that, but it was the payback, and he got what he deserved. My hand sensually rubbed the precum into his length, making him throw his head back and shut his eyes under my touch.

“Somebody’s excited,” I taunted him as soon as I felt him twitch in my hand. Taehyung couldn’t wait for more, and he didn’t even have to voice his needs; his body showed me exactly what he yearned.

Slowly, yet steadily picking up my pace, I blew my hair off my face and looked into Taehyung’s dark eyes as if trying to figure out what was going on inside his head.

“Tell me what you want, Tae,” I whispered, licking his earlobe. “And I may give you just that,” I added, letting my breath tickle his wet skin. Gently, I brushed my nose against his neck, waiting for his reply. His heart was beating rapidly, and I heard him swallowing hard before he could formulate his answer.

“I’ve got one hell of a list actually,” Taehyung said after a moment of thinking. He seriously seemed deep in his thoughts, and considering the playful smirk that appeared on his face, he meant it. “We won’t cross everything out at once, that’s for sure.”

“I don’t reckon it as a onetime thing,” I admitted, and Taehyung grinned at me in relief.

“I don’t either,” Taehyung confirmed, planting a chaste kiss on my lips. “I’m so glad that we’re on the same page for once,” he added seductively, blowing at the wet spot on my neck where a hickey was slowly forming. How the hell am I going to explain that when Jin and Hoseok come back? “You know what? Fuck it; I can’t wait,” he spoke, turning me around, pushing me over the desk, which sat on the other side of the room.

“Ahh…” I moaned when Taehyung spanked me. “Taehyung–” I purred, as his large hand began massaging my butt before it even started to sting.

“What is it, baby?” Taehyung asked in concern, as he leaned forward, and I arched my back, meeting him halfway, playfully biting his bottom lip. “Do you like it like that?” Taehyung inquired when I released his lips. His length was poking me, and I barely could stand that.

“You know I do,” I answered through clenched teeth, as Taehyung grabbed his cock, teasing me with its tip sliding up and down my soaked folds. I was ready to take him, but he wouldn’t let me feel the pleasure yet. When it came to sex, Taehyung sometimes could be a sadist, especially when I did him wrong. “Please,” I howled, sticking up my butt, rubbing it against his erection.

“I can’t keep you waiting when you’re begging me like this,” Taehyung admitted, spinning me around, sitting me on the desk. Quickly, I spread my legs, letting Taehyung between them. “Do you have a condom?” he asked, and I shook my head. Lack of protection wouldn’t stop me now, though. I wanted it too much to stop in the middle.

“Just pull out when you think you’re close,” I replied, and Taehyung sighed. “You’ve always loved coming on my tits; that hasn’t changed, has it?” I teased him, and Taehyung agreed with a sly smirk.

“No, it hasn’t,” he confirmed, and I gasped when he pushed his cock inside of me without any warning. It didn’t hurt because he had stretched me well, but I still didn’t expect him to enter me so desperately. “You’re so warm,” he moaned, as he trusted his hips back and forth inside of me.

The melody of my hushed moans and Taehyung throaty gasps played in my ears, with each thrust my voice going louder. His hips moved swiftly, but his hands traveled across my skin agonizingly slowly, making me wrap my legs around him, pulling him close as it was possible.

“Tae–“ I cried out, biting my bottom lip. Taehyung was making me feel heavenly, and until now, I didn’t realize how sex-deprived I had been. Thankfully, the dry spell’s over. “Please, go faster,” I begged, as I propped myself on my right hand, rubbing my clit with the other one.

My orgasm was near, and I would be pissed if Taehyung denied me of it. (It had always been a kink of his, and I learned it the hard way.)

Exactly how I told him to, Taehyung quickened his pace, making me choke on air.

“Oh, baby,” he rasped in his low voice, as he leaned forward, his lips smashing against my neck, trailing wet kisses down to my collarbones, marking me again. I gulped in pleasure when his mouth sucked on my skin, and although I hated love marks, this time I didn’t mind them at all. “You’re mine, you’re mine,” Taehyung repeated desperately, and I just nodded, kissing in his confirmation.

“I’m yours,” I moaned, arching my back when he finally found the most sensitive bud. I was only a couple of strokes away from my high, and all I needed was Taehyung to maintain his pace. “I’m yours,” I hissed when my walls started to pulse and tighten around him.

“You better come soon. I’m close, too,” Taehyung warned me, and I rolled my eyes at him. He would have to be really stupid if he seriously thought I’d deny my orgasm.

“Yes, yes, yes, just like that,” I whispered, raking my fingertips across his back, scratching it. I was on the verge, and I needed something to hold on. “Taehyung, I’m almost there,” I closed my eyes, giving myself into the embrace of a sweet peak, flavored with Taehyung’s raspy voice and musky smell.

The second I felt the paradise, a faint noise of the landline filled the space, killing the mood. My walls squeezed around Taehyung’s throbbing cock, coating it with my juices.

“Fuck, Tae,” I screamed, as Taehyung kept pounding his hips, helping me ride out my orgasm.

“Whoever is on the line is fucking persistent,” Taehyung commented, shaking his head, as he couldn’t believe that anyone would call them at such unholy hour. “Shit, I want to come inside you so fucking much,” he announced, as he pulled out his cock. Quickly, he started to pump it up and down with his hand, and I just watched him with my legs spread, my teeth biting the bottom lip.

“I wouldn’t really mind if you did,” I replied, but it was too late. My words triggered him, and with a couple of strokes, he came all over my stomach and breasts.

“You’re fucking amazing,” he breathed out, as he looked at me from underneath his sticky fringe. Taehyung’s satisfied and exhausted demeanor looked handsome on him, and unless I sat on the desk, it would sweep me off my feet. “I mean it,” he added, leaning to place a pack on my lips.

Then the phone rang again.

Taehyung growled in annoyance, but walked toward the landline, and picked up the phone. “Ghostbusters; how can I help you?” Taehyung answered the call politely, but his gaze was still on me as if he was enchanted. And frankly, I felt the same way about him.  I couldn’t wait for him to hang up and come back to me, so we could properly celebrate our ceasefire.

“Of course, I’m on my way,” he answered, and I shook my head since there was no way I would be joining him on another mission.

I’d rather stay in and warm up the bed for him, hoping that everything turns up easier this time around.

[bctrashtime]

Only saw you post about BC meetings fans now and have to say I agree hard with some of what you said. I was elated when it was announced concerts would be allowed again (and then super stumped when they just kept getting canceled whereas in other countries I could watch people go on several concerts in a month) but I was still so wary and sceptical because like covid isn't over yet?? Not at all?? Germany is battling with the highest count of cases in the whole of pandemic atm?

When I saw the first pics of them face to face with fans without masks I was like are you fucking stupid?! Sure it doesn't look as nice on the picture but you don't want to get sick right? And I am still feeling so uncomfortable knowing I will be in a room with hundreds of people of whom some of them will have covid because they're assholes and most of them won't wear a mask (which I will do) and people have the audacity to complain they are not meeting fans anymore? Do they want them getting sick? Do they want that they have to interrupt the tour because someone got covid? I really don't get it. It's like people switch off their minds once their get the opportunity to see a "celebrity". Some people have to catch up with reality I am afraid.

This was very much a rant, feel free not to publish.

No, I agree!

But I also feel like Blind Channel themselves are being hypocrites. They have to be aware that they are responsible for gathering that crowd too (more so during their headlining tour than just supporting), and that (unmasked) concerts aren't safe at the moment. 🤷

Even if they stay on stage they are still in the same indoor venue as a few hundred up to 6000 people, creating one giant covid bubble all breathing on each other. Because like you said there's gonna be sick people unmasked in the crowd.

It's also not like BC are wearing masks when stepping out to meet fans and are then asked to remove them. They themselves decide not to wear them in the first place 😬

Sure fans are being stupid but how can you blame them completely if BC are being stupid too? 🙄

Plus, they are already back to meeting fans. mfs with the moral backbone of a chocolate eclair 😂😂

[fortisfiliae]

Gin, Ice and Everything Nice [Draco Malfoy x reader]

Summary: This one shot takes place some years after Hogwarts, in the early 2000s, where Draco and the reader meet again by coincidence, to find out they’re not as different as the thought.

A/n: This is for @littleroserabbit as she’s a total sweetheart and needs a little bit of fluff in her life like we all do. I’m usually writing for the Marauders, it’s my first time creating something for Draco and a lot more modern than my usual fics, so I hope I’m meeting everyone’s needs.

Warnings: fluff, get’s a little steamy but nothing too wild

Word count: 2.6k

The past week has been nothing but absolute shit.  It should have gone so well, everything was meant to be perfect in your new, independent adult life. You rented a cosy flat in London, managed to get a job in the Ministry’s headquarter and even met a chap called Aaron, who was interested enough to ask for your number. It all seemed excellent, except that it wasn’t.

The flat was described as cosy, which would have been appropriate if cosy stood for tiny, shabby and somewhat gross.  Your job at the ministry, in the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, sounded splendid when you read its description on the registration sheet, but turned out to be a disastrous struggle with heaps of paperwork, under the control of a woman, that could have been easily related to Satan himself.

None of your friends lived near you anymore, so you couldn’t vent your anger and complain about your current situation properly. The occasional owl you received from some of them, made you happy for a second, although most of their letters consisted of their collective stories, telling you how much fun they were having, going out together and enjoying themselves, without you.

At least there was Aaron, who asked you to meet him at a bar on Friday evening. Right? You were on your way to said bar, called ‘Chequers’, already walking down the busy street and looking for its neon sign when your phone rang. Two short beeps chimed out of your handbag, letting you know you received a text.  You stopped to take your phone out and read Aaron’s message:

“Hey, sorry I can’t make it tonight.”

He really had the guts to cancel your date five minutes before it started. Your brows furrowed, when you answered:

“Wow, thanks. Could have told me a little bit earlier, I’m almost there.”

You stood on the pavement, clicking the back of your heel to the ground and stared bitterly on the screen of your Nokia before it buzzed again: 

“Told you I’m sorry. I think we shouldn’t keep this going. Sorry again.”

Did he just dump you via text? A great ending to a perfect week. You sighed and let your phone fall back into your bag, not bothering to even answer that git anymore. Shaking your head, as you still couldn’t believe the audacity he had, to dismiss you such cowardly way, you turned around to see that you stood right in front of Chequers.  Shrugging, you debated with yourself, if you should walk in alone. You really could use a drink, that’s for sure, but going to a bar on your own, seemed a little pathetic. ‘Screw it’, you thought. The day couldn’t get any worse and you didn’t know anyone here anyway.

The air was thick and coated with cigarette smoke when you entered and the music playing was drowned by people’s voices. It was rather full inside, only a few tables were unoccupied, whereas the space around the bar was completely packed. You sat down at a small table in the furthest corner, that gave you a good view over the place and studied the drinks menu for a minute, before a lovely waitress came to take your order. She didn’t question if you waited for someone, which you were silently thankful for and asked for a glass of Gin and Tonic. One drink and you’d go home.

When she left to prepare it, you let your gaze wander from the people beside you, over to the bar, where a group of guys visibly blathered about some women next to them, making desperate attempts to flirt.  Another guy sat there alone, his head lowered, and stared into his empty glass. The shadow that wrapped around him, created by his sitting position, covered most of his face. ‘Fellow sufferer’, you thought, yet your eyes stuck to him, as his silhouette looked deeply familiar, but you didn’t know where to put him. Strands of his white-blond hair hung into his face and you could have sworn that you have seen this sharp facial features before he lifted his head and his eyes found yours. Piercing grey orbs looked over to you, while his brows copied your own and rose in surprise.

Draco Malfoy. Alone, in a bar. In a muggle bar to be precise. What in Godric’s name was he doing here? The smirk his lips formed sent you straight back into school days, where he managed to get everything he wanted, with exactly that grin. You had been friends back then. Well, in your first few years at least, until Pansy Parkinson decided to spend each second of her time running after him and keeping every female as far away as she could. The rumours that spread about him joining the Death Eaters, were what finally made you depart completely.

You watched him, as he turned over and waved towards the waitress, who quickly walked up to him. He talked to her and looked back to you for a second, before she turned around to take a glance as well, then nodded to him. When she returned, she handed him two glasses, filled with clear liquid, ice and a slice of lemon, which he took before he stood up from his stool and started to head your way. He looked stunning, as he walked across the floor, taking confident steps, yet elegant, almost as if he floated. He had definitely matured in the few years you hadn’t seen him and it benefited his looks even more. His shoulders have gotten a bit broader, posture looked more healthy and his three-day stubble suited him exceptionally well.

“Hello (Y/N). Didn’t expect to see you here”, he said, as he stood next to the free chair of your table, his voice a tone deeper than you remembered it to be.

“I could say the same about you, Draco”, you replied and shot him a knowing grin.

He chuckled before he went on: “Do you mind if I sit with you, or are you waiting for someone?”

“Take a seat please, I’m... not waiting”, you said, your last words turning into a whisper.

He placed the glasses at the centre of the table, pulled out the chair and sat down. “I asked the waitress to make me the same thing you’ve ordered, so I hope it tastes good. Gin Tonic, isn’t it?”

“It is. You never had one before?”

“No, I recently discovered my passion for scotch, so that’s what I’ve been sticking with”, he said and placed one of the drinks in front of you, holding up his own and tilted it your way. “Cheers to the good old days, then?”

“Drop the ‘good’ and I’m in”, you answered in an attempt to be witty, but both of you frowned slightly, remembering the war that happened in your last school year. “Cheers”, you mumbled, clinked your glass with his, took a big sip and went on talking, trying to brighten the mood again: “So, what brings Draco Malfoy to a muggle bar in London?”

He grinned and ran his fingertip along the rim of his glass, as he answered: “That’s a long story actually. Let’s just say, I may have changed some of my ways, since school. How about you? What are you doing here?”

“I moved here a week ago, for my job at the Ministry.”

“Oh, I see. Sounds great! And why did you come to a bar alone?”

“Why are you here alone?”

“I asked first.” His daring grin appeared once again.

“Well, I may or may not have been asked to meet someone here.”

“And?”

“And he dumped me ten minutes ago. Via text. Text is a-”

“I know what a text is, (Y/N)”, he laughed and pulled out his phone from his jacket. “They’re really more convenient than owls.”

You couldn’t hide the surprised look on your face. He really had changed since school. “I can’t believe that’s actually you”, you giggled. “Now that I told you my embarrassing story, let me hear your reason for being here on your own.”

He took a sip, looked at his glass while tasting the drink and nodded approvingly, telling you he liked it, non-verbally. “I’m living down the street and don’t want to spend my weekends at home, so I discovered London’s nightlife for a while.” Of course, he lived in the city centre. The Malfoys were still wealthy after all.

“You’re discovering the nightlife alone?”, you asked.

“Well, yes. I thought the only way to meet new people is going out for a bit. And as we see, my plan worked out”, he said and tilted his head your way, before drinking again.

“I’m not new though”, you snickered.

“True, but you’re one of the few people from school, I actually enjoy meeting.”

“Why is that?”

“Most of them didn’t really grow up, you know? Still hold grudges against entire families and so on.”

“So you’re not with Pansy anymore?”, you asked, trying to sound as casual as possible about it, but you knew he could sense your curiosity, as the left corner of his mouth shot upwards.

“No, we broke up a while ago. How about you?”

“Well, I only got to know this guy I would meet here some days ago, but he kind of ‘broke up’ with me, moments before our first date”, you told him and rolled your eyes at the thought of it.

“Entirely his loss, then. And my luck”, he sneered and drank the rest of his drink in one sip. “Another round on lost love?”

You snorted while downing yours and replied: “Sure, why not?”

You kept on talking for what felt like minutes, about everything and anything that happened in the years you didn’t see each other, ordering one drink after another. Your topics went from school stories, over teachers up to your current lives and your tongue loosened more with each sip. At some point, you even had the guts to tell him, that your current job was ‘nothing but a shitload of fucking desk work’, as you called it and he tried to make you feel better, by telling you he didn’t even have a job. You knew didn’t need one, but let him take part in your misery and enjoyed making fun of each other’s ‘pitiful’ lives.

It was past 4 a.m. when the waitress came over to tell you, they would close soon. You insisted to split the bill, but Draco waved you off and paid for each drink both of you have had.

When you stood up, you recognized how dazed you really were. It wasn’t that bad, but you were certainly too tipsy to disapparate home.  Draco held the door for you to exit and followed you outside, where people were still straying around, looking for another pub to stumble into.

You turned to him, trying not to stagger and said: “I’m taking a taxi home. Thanks for the nice eve-”

“No!”, he interrupted you and bit his tongue the second after he did so. “I mean, you could come with me if you want. Home.” He saw your flustered expression and went on: “Not like that. Just to talk some more. I feel like we still have a lot to catch up on.”

The noise that was intended to be a giggle, came out of you as a grunt and you asked: “Are you trying to seduce me, Malfoy?”

“I’m trying to be a gentleman here, but you’re not making this easy for me”, he chuckled.

“Fine, let’s go my gentleman”, you chimed and linked your arm with his, not only to emphasize your statement but to keep more balanced as well and you weren’t sure if the tickling feeling in your stomach was the Gin or tiny butterflies.

The two of you walked for about five minutes, you follow his lead and kept on talking about Draco’s attempts to get into professional Quidditch, which have been unsuccessful yet. None of England’s pro teams contacted him, except for the Appleby Arrows, who offered him to practice as their reserve Seeker, which he declined. He seemed to be slightly embarrassed about it, so you didn’t ask any further before he pointed to a tall building you approached and went to open the heavy gate of the ground floor.

You went in after him and took the elevator upstairs, to the top floor. ‘Penthouse. How typical’, you thought and grinned, swearing yourself, you would never let him see your bad excuse for a flat. When you arrived at the highest storey, the lift opened and Draco walked towards the only door in the hallway to unlock it. His movements stretched the fabric of his jacket between his shoulder blades and showed off his muscular torso, making you want to touch him.

Your hand was faster than your thoughts and landed on his back softly before you were able to comprehend what you just did. He turned his head your way, as he opened the door and sent you a questioning grin. “What are you doing?”, he asked in a chuckle.

“Sorry, I’m drunk”, you mumbled, but went a step closer, in contrast to your statement.

“You are”, he said and brought his hand up to your face, to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. Draco took your hand, to lead you inside, but you leaned into his touch and pressed your body to his before he lowered his head a tiny bit and kissed you.

It started slow when he pulled you in, your lips brushing over his softly, but turned deeper and more eager very quickly, as you felt your hunger for him emerging, more prominently each second.

The door shut behind you, he pulled his head back, his pale lips now tinted pink and breathed with a smile: “You’re drunk.” He said it like he meant it, yet his hand cupped your cheek and his lips touched yours again.

You nodded as your kiss continued, his tongue now stroking teasingly over your own. Your moves happened without prior discussion, you held on to his shoulders, jumped and Draco picked you up, your legs wrapped around his hips and he started walking, while you nestled your face to his neck, closed your eyes and giggled quietly to the soft vibrations his steps sent.

When he stopped, you lifted your head to see that he brought you to his bedroom. “You’re drunk”, you chuckled and kissed him once again.

He nodded this time, went towards his bed, where he let you down on. Your heads parted for a moment, his hooded eyes traced every inch of your face, mouth slightly agape before your restless lips collided once more.

“We’re drunk”, you mumbled as you gasped for air, yet you pulled the collar of his shirt down, to get him even closer.

“We are”, he sighed as he let himself fall to his side and held your hand to prevent you from further yanking his clothes. “Should we stop?”

You watched his chest rising and lowering at a swift pace, rolled over to lie on your side as well, to face him and agreed: “We probably should.”

He ran his fingers through your hair, which sent a string of shivers down your body, and nodded endorsing before he kissed your forehead.

“Draco?”, you asked, snuggling into his chest.

“Yes?”

“I think I’m too dizzy to leave. I’ll disapparate home when I’m sober, okay?”

“Okay. Or, you know... You stay for a little longer.”

“Okay.”

Hope you liked it, please tell me if you did, or didn’t. As always, thank you for reading. xoxo

Permanent tags: @geeksareunique @little-hufflepuff-badger @marauderskeeper @giggleberts @way-obsessed5 @oreofrappiewithblueberry @draqcnheartstrinq @hpwritersnet

[theangelmojo]

4am Wiki Adventures

I typed “Lord Byron” into Wiki. Don’t ask me why. Those early morning hours, you know.

And I knew stuff about him before, but not stuff. Not like the stuff Wiki can, so I was not prepared for the awesome of Lord Byron. 

This guy’s insane, like, he is The King of Le Drama. The biggest drama-llama to ever ding-dong, I stg. He takes extreme to a whole new level. Like, you know those posts where they go “well that escalated quickly”, he is that. 

So I have some facts I’d like to share. Random facts. Hilarious facts. Facts that are totally unnecessary and unimportant to know, but are the thing I am probably gonna think about for the next solid week. 

Hold onto your hats, folks, we’re in for a long ride. 

1. His father was a douche. Only married women for their money, bled them for that money, stuck babies in them and then ditched them. What an asshole.

2. He had Issues with his mom, who was understandably depressed because of her asshole husband, and reportedly called her “short and fat” (assholery is genetic, probs). In return she had Issues with him, but also spoilt him and is part of the reason Byron is well known for being stupid with his money (also genetic, probs). 

THIS CONTINUES FOR A WHILE, SO I’LL PUT THIS UNDER THE CUT TO SPARE YOUR DASH, SORRY

3. He started falling in love with people at a reaaaaally young age. Like, whoa son, steady on chap. His first crush was a distant cousin (Mary Duff) at the age of 8, who he then forgot about till he turned 16 and found out she was gonna get married. Then he remembered her and was like oh heck, how will my heart go on and wrote a big paragraph about it, wherein he acknowledged the fact that his feelings were ridiculous but nevertheless intense and true. 

4. That one wasn’t a sexual love though, apparently, but he also acknowledges that he started developing shall we say certain ‘cravings’ at a considerably young age. He claims this is partly the reason why he writes like he does. In his own words: “Perhaps this was one of the reasons that caused the anticipated melancholy of my thoughts — having anticipated life.”

5. At this point there are a bunch of people who want to claim that his, how shall we put it, ‘young sexual awakening’?? is the reason for his “sexual propensities”. Like, no dude, he’s just bi. Accept it.

(I’d like to cut in here and say that the next fact made me very sad. Very very sad. 4am Me was not prepared for the sudden hit of sadness and started sniffling a lot. Prepare yo’self.)

6. There are reports that he was sexually abused as a kid. One of his abusers was one of his caretakers, Mary Gray, who was later dismissed when he turned 11. She also used this abuse as a way of keeping him silent about the bad company she kept. I mean like, holy shit, that is such a nasty bitch. My god, I hate reading about stuff like this. (4am in the morning and I whimpered “poor baby” to myself, blinking through tears) Then this guy called Lord Gray De Ruthyn, who was also one of his mother’s suitors, also forced himself on Byron. The poor little guy was “deeply disturbed by this” (no shit) and apparently never told his mom, which in hindsight is probably part of the reason for his Issues with her. My god, this guy was so destined to be an angst-writer. Jesus Christ. 

And then some asshole historians or god knows who have the audacity to suggest that these events led to him having sexual liaisons with men at college like what the fuck. How many times do you have to say “he was bi” till it gets through their fucking skulls mother of god --

Moving on.

7. Onto the more interesting and hilarious facts. His first male loves were found at Harrow, where he found a fondness for a bunch of lads, all named John. John FitzGibbon, John Thomas Claridge, John Edleston, John Cam Hobhouse. Must have been real confusing trying to navigate all these Johns, but one thing he knew for sure is that he definitely likes boys too. 

8. Proof of him liking them boys is him pouring all his fucking money on them. This guy was such a freaking Sugar Daddy. Jesus. He left £7000 in his will to a 14 year old boy he met in Athens who taught him Italian. I mean, the sum of money got cancelled, but still. Come on, By. This isn't even the only time he shoved his money at a guy, no siree, but we’ll get to that part later.

9. The most likely reason he left England was because of his reportedly incestuous relationship with his half-sister Augusta Leigh. Ugh. Okay, this one grossed me out, but he like, had children with her too, apparently. Around this time he also got married to Annabella Millbanke and had a kid (Ada Lovelace!!) with her, but their marriage was too shit and she thought he was insane so she left him. All this scandal forced him to leave due to all the rumours circulating, plus the fact that he was majorly in debt too at the time. No surprise there.

10. Once he left England, he never came back. He went to Belgium. Then to Switzerland, where he met another John -- John William Polidori, who became his physician, and there he also befriended Percy Bysshe Shelley, and Mary Shelley (née Godwin). He had another affair with another lady, this time Clair Clairmont, who was Mary’s stepsister. Got her pregnant too. 

11. This lovely bunch of drama-llamas then got rained in, and due to the shitty weather they were stuck indoors for 3 days. During this time they read a bunch of cool horror stories, which then inspired them to write their own. Yes guys, this is where Frankenstein was born, but not only that -- John William Polidori also wrote The Vampyre (with a Y) which is The Start of the romantic vampire genre. That’s right folks -- thanks to this guy, we have Twilight. (But in all honesty, his story is far better, go check it out.)

12. Byron is super clever. No surprise there, but an example of this is that he learnt the Armenian language and culture well enough over a couple years to write books on it. He was passionate about Armenian culture and history, dude, like he proper went for it, and his writings and teachings inspired a wave of Armenian poets and writers. Not bad, Byron. Not bad.

13. Dude falls in love every-freaking-where, and not casual love, oh no -- he falls madly in love every fucking time. Where does he get the energy? God only knows. This time he falls for this 18 year old Countess, Teresa Guiccioli, and ends up eloping with her. Thing is, she’s married. (Byron NO)

14. Byron likes animals to the degree that Damian Wayne likes animals (sorry for the Batman reference, but I can’t help it, it’s who I am), ergo: he loves them. In one of Shelley’s letters, he describes the house as such: “Lord B.’s establishment consists, besides servants, of ten horses, eight enormous dogs, three monkeys, five cats, an eagle, a crow, and a falcon; and all these, except the horses, walk about the house, which every now and then resounds with their unarbitrated quarrels, as if they were the masters of it… [P.S.] I find that my enumeration of the animals in this Circean Palace was defective… I have just met on the grand staircase five peacocks, two guinea hens, and an Egyptian crane.” Get on that, Dami. You’ve got a long way to go to reach this level.

To add to this fact, he also had a Newfoundland dog called Boatswain (???) who he loved so much that when the animal contracted rabies, he nursed him “without any thought or fear of becoming bitten and infected.” (cue: 4am Me hysterically sobbing about this). Also, even though he was in debt at the time, Byron commissioned a funerary monument to be built for Boatswain at Newstead Abbey, which was the only building work which he ever carried out on his estate. The thing was bigger than his own grave, and in his 1811 Will (what is this guy with Wills), he requested that he be buried with him. Also, he wrote a 26‐line poem called "Epitaph to a Dog" in honour of Boatswain. That is some serious dog-love there, you have to give him that, and as I said before: he never falls casually in love, only ever madly.

ANOTHER THING. I’m just gonna quote this straight from Wiki cos I can’t put it any better: “Byron also kept a tame bear while he was a student at Trinity, out of resentment for rules forbidding pet dogs like his beloved Boatswain. There being no mention of bears in their statutes, the college authorities had no legal basis for complaining. Byron even suggested that he would apply for a college fellowship for the bear.” Byron, my man, that is So Extra. (“What’s that? I can’t have a dog here? Well, no problem, I’ll just get a bear.” “BYRON, Byron what the fuck. Where did you even get a bear? Bears aren't indigenous to England.” “He’s very intelligent. Loves to read. Heck, lemme get him enrolled here.” “Byron what the fuck.”)

15. Skipping ahead a little, he ends up in Genoa, right, and gets Bored. Probably because of lack of pets. Possibly because he’s not Fallen Madly In Love with anyone recently, though he’s still technically ‘with’ the Countess, let’s be real -- this boy isn't good with commitment. So, he gets bored and this is where he starts getting involved with the movement for Greek independence from the Ottoman Empire. He realises he still has his lady with him but cannot join this military movement whilst she’s still around, so he ends up shipping her back to her dad (dick move, Byron). 

Then this guy called Edward Blaquiere tries to recruit him, and Byron realises he has no fucking clue what he’s meant to be doing. In his own words: "Blaquiere seemed to think that I might be of some use-even here;-though what he did not exactly specify". Get it together, Byron, FFS. He boards a ship called Hercules (ha ha) to go to Greece, and the poor Countess lady weeps while waving him goodbye, but then Hercules has to return to port, so that dramatic farewell wasn’t nearly as dramatic as he’d probably been hoping for. Oh well.

Moving on -- 

(-- okay, to be honest, I kind of glossed over the whole part with his involvement in the war. I mostly picked out the parts that stood out to my 5am Brain, which were mostly to do with money or the boys he was eyeing. No offence meant in the way I’ve interpreted things. I fully blame the fact that I should have stopped reading Wiki five hours ago, but didn’t, and also I have a dumb sense of humour.)

16. Byron chucks money at the Greeks. Where did he get this money? No one knows, but he gives the Souliots £6000. Then, to be fair, he gets fed up of them asking for more and more money. He cuts off the Souliots and tells them to get stuffed. 

At some point he sells his estate, Rochdale Manor in Scotland, which gets him some £11,250, which means Byron has something like £20,000 altogether, all of which he plans on giving to the Greek cause. “In today's money Byron would have been a millionaire many times over, and the news that a fabulously wealthy British aristocrat known for his generosity in spending money had arrived in Greece made Byron the object of much solicitation in a desperately poor country like Greece.” Byron, old chap, that is super generous of you but what the fuck. I kept thinking to myself, reading this, what the fuckkkk?? Like, the cockles of my heart were warmed, but my brain couldn't comprehend it. May I remind you, he got into this because he was B O R E D, and now he’s throwing all his money at this ??? What even a r e  y o u  B y r o n ? ? ?

I don’t mean to make any judgements here, but this is then where Byron draws some Attention to himself again. Throwing all this money around -- it’s no surprise that suddenly all the different Greek factions start to fight over him, and in my 5am Brain, all I could see was Byron being like “kids, pls, stahp” and getting all exasperated with it. In Wiki’s much better written words: “he complained that the Greeks were hopelessly disunited and spent more time feuding with each other than in trying to win independence.”

17. As a little ‘aside’, whilst all of this is happening, Byron falls in love. Again. Madly. To another boy. This time his Greek page, Lukas Chalandritsanos, who he spent some £600 (equivalent to about £24,600 in today's money) over the course of six months on, and wrote his last poems about his passion for. Holy hell, Byron, control yourself please. And then Wiki slams down the coldest line to all this drama and goes: “but Chalandritsanos was only interested in Byron's money” -- and I’m sorry, I almost peed myself laughing. Omg Byron, that is cold. 

18. Spoiler alert: Byron dies young. He dies at 36, just before setting sail on an expedition. On 15 February 1824, he falls ill and then, my friends, comes the usual, in the form of the typical historical medical fuck-up remedy of bloodletting. When I read this I legitimately SMH, because how many books have I read where they use bloodletting to try to cure someone and SHOCK HORROR, it ends up killing them? Poor guy gets made worse by it, makes a partial recovery, but then catches a violent cold which then more therapeutic bleeding (insisted on by his doctors) ends up making worse. It is suspected that this treatment, carried out with unsterilised medical instruments, may have caused sepsis, and then he dies. 

Sometimes, looking back on historical medicine and treatment methods... I realise how lucky we are nowadays, to know better. Things like this also remind me that despite how much I’d like to go back in time to see history and stuff, it’s probably not a good idea. Not only because of this, but also the lack of plumbing. And hygiene. And sanitation. And wifi -- omg no internet, no thank you.

19. So, to end it all, Byron’s English friends are shocked to hear he’s died, and his Greek friends all mourn him as a hero. 

20. Now, to describe how Byron looks... according to Wiki, he was: “5 feet 8.5 inches (1.74 m), his weight fluctuating between 9.5 stone (133 lb; 60 kg) and 14 stone (200 lb; 89 kg). He was renowned for his personal beauty, which he enhanced by wearing curl-papers in his hair at night.” Ha ha ha, ha... 

Then he’s also famous for having Foot Issues, namely a deformity of his right foot. Whether he’s clubfooted, a consequence of infantile paralysis, or dysplasia -- what’s agreed is he had Foot Issues. The Foot gave him a limp, and “caused him lifelong psychological and physical misery, aggravated by painful and pointless "medical treatment" in his childhood and the nagging suspicion that with proper care it might have been cured.” At this point, in my head I went ‘awww, poor baby’, and felt sorry for him (I still do), but then I read on, and.

Byron was his usual Byron-like self about it, so I couldn't help but giggle.

Firstly, he nicknamed himself ‘le diable boiteux’ (French for "the limping devil", also the nickname given to Asmodeus by Alain-René Lesage in his 1707 novel of the same name). 

Secondly, although he often wore specially-made shoes in an attempt to hide The Foot, he refused to wear any type of brace that might improve The Limp. Byron, seriously, wear the brace. A Scottish novelist (John Galt) said he felt his oversensitivity to the "innocent fault in his foot was unmanly and excessive" because the limp was "not greatly conspicuous". 

[He first met Byron on a voyage to Sardinia and did not realise he had any deficiency for several days, and still could not tell at first if the lameness was a temporary injury or not but by the time he met Byron he was an adult and had worked to develop "a mode of walking across a room by which it was scarcely at all perceptible". The motion of the ship at sea may also have helped to create a favourable first impression and hide any deficiencies in his gait, but Galt's biography is also described as being "rather well-meant than well-written", so Galt may be guilty of minimising a defect that was actually still noticeable]

Byron. Oh Byron. I feel sorry that he was so self-conscious of his foot deformity, don’t get me wrong, but I can’t help but also giggle imagining him doing all this. It’s so dramatic. This boy. 

In short, simply from reading the Wiki article on Lord George Gordon Byron, I feel incredibly fond of, exasperated by, entertained by, and confused by this hugely influential, incredibly dramatic and complex historical figure.

I already love reading poems and quotes by him, but knowing more about him now... I am also inspired by him. Even from just a Wiki article, even from just reading this one source about his life at a questionable time of night -- I feel like I understand better why people have coined the term “Byronic hero” in honour of him. 

[The Byronic hero presents an idealised, but flawed character whose attributes include: great talent; great passion; a distaste for society and social institutions; a lack of respect for rank and privilege (although possessing both); being thwarted in love by social constraint or death; rebellion; exile; an unsavory secret past; arrogance; overconfidence or lack of foresight; and, ultimately, a self-destructive manner. These types of characters have since become ubiquitous in literature and politics.]

I see Byronic heroes all over the place. In all my fandoms, in all walks of life. From the classic Heathcliff to the likes of the Hunchback of Notre Dame (sobs), to The Phantom of the Opera (sobs), to Lestat from Interview with a Vampire, to Batman (LOLs), to fucking Edward Cullen from Twilight (gags).

The drama-llama lives on in all types of characters, in so many fictional worlds. As someone who lives to read and loves to write, I am completely unsurprised that stumbling across a Wiki page such as his has moved me so deeply, because in so many ways it was like reading a fanfic (albeit the driest, flattest fanfic I’ve ever read in my life). In so many ways I saw so many of my favourite characters written in his life, and by golly, it’s just fantastic to think that he actually lived in our world, isn't it? To think that and know that is both wonderful and strange. 

So, without anything left to add to this long, ridiculous post, I apologise for rambling on about a dead poet and contributing absolutely no new information to what is already known about him. I am aware all I’m doing is regurgitating old facts and basically oohing and ahhing over them, like an idiot. All I can say is I’m glad for Wiki, and Jesus Christ, I’ve got to start going to bed earlier than this. 

Auf wiedersehen. 

[plantohead]

I just rant about how terrible my “mother” was so yeah that’s all. Basically, I legitimately hope she dies soon because right now she’s lashing out about her beef with me and hurting my sisters and I’m not cool with that, but I’m also in no position to put myself between them because I really can’t handle going back into that situation. So yah, this terrible person should just drop dead, preferably soon, like tomorrow maybe.

Sue thinks I would be giving myself a bad image if I aired our dirty laundry but joke's on her because she's the only one that looks bad. She also thinks I'm telling lies, but joke's on her the only liar is her because anyone who knows me knows I am a terrible liar. I can't even play the card game BS. Middle-school me was more hardened than I am now.

Sue was a toxic af person and I can’t believe it took me so long to realize it. She planted the seeds at an early age and undermine my confidence, agency, ability to stand up for myself and enforce boundaries, and my happiness and wellbeing. She would say terrible things, gaslight me, and was all around just horribly emotionally abusive. She made Dan into a toxic person, too. She made me toxic. She plays family members against each other. You had to side with her on everything, and everyone else was wrong about something, and usually something big. Dan was not a good husband. Her oldest child was ungrateful. Her middle child was too shallow and didn't love her. Her youngest child couldn't learn anything right. Oh, but she was never in the wrong. How dare you insinuate such a thing. The mere suggestion could send her flying into a rage. I'd say she was a screaming banshee or a screaming harpy, but the truth is she outscreams them both. Simultaneously. As in, if both were screaming, she'd still win. Distance doesn’t help, either. If she can’t scream at you in person, she’ll just send you more than 300 texts in one day (I let them accumulate one day and literally my notifications were over 300) telling you that you’re a terrible person and the worst child ever and you’re such a loser, you won’t amount to anything, oh and your boyfriend doesn’t actually love because only a mother could. Rinse and repeat for the next 5 days.

I have grown up being told I was lazy. I believed that for the longest time, and I'm still unlearning it. I was lazy despite having learned to play piano, flute, and guitar and having a brief stint with the violin and piccolo. I was lazy despite maintaining high grades while being in marching band in high school and joining the jazz band in my last year (I was terrible by the way, I'm through and through a Classical/Romantic period pianist). I was lazy in uni when I earned top grades while going to concerts, attending ballroom classes, training in wushu, taking additional credits, reading books outside of school, sketching, studying for the LSAT, rehearsing in a band, writing songs, and writing a thesis. She never believed I studied because all she ever saw were photos of when I was having fun. No shit sherlock, I take like 100+ photos and 50 videos of just one concert, and I'm not going to take pictures of my calculus notebooks, please... But so be it, I was lazy, and now every time my work ethic comes into question, I spiral out of control and become exactly what I'm supposed to be: lazy.

I was told that I was ungrateful, hateful, and oversensitive. Never mind that being told you are ungrateful and hateful would lead to some sensitive feelings. Never mind that you are supposed to raise the child you so graciously decided to give life to because it's your goddamn responsibility. Never mind that said child might occasionally hate you when you slam your hands on the table and scream at the top of your lungs at them and call them names, maybe hit them across the face a couple times. Never mind that I might have been ungrateful because you always said you owed me nothing when yeah, you did. Parenting. Love. Some emotional stability. Maybe you should actually try it out. Oh wait, you blew it, go rot in hell.

I was raised such that my talents and accomplishments were turned into an extension of Sue, while all my perceived faults were because I wasn't good enough. I have been made to doubt myself with guilt-tripping, manipulation, and gaslighting. Get this: after I came out about my sexual abuse, at some point I asked to log into my Facebook account on Sue's tablet. I forgot to log out when I returned to uni, but I didn't think it would be a problem. No, I was wrong, BIG PROBLEM. Without my knowledge or consent, Sue monitored all my Facebook activity and messages. She was "worried" because of my abuser. You know, the one that had fled to Japan 7 years ago and who I had blocked on Facebook. That one. When I found out what she was doing, she had the gall to tell me she was doing it for my own good. Not only that, but then this August, I brought it up again because it unfortunately became relevant AGAIN, and she had the audacity to first deny she ever did such a thing. I told her I still had records of it somewhere in my email archive because those things never die. I KNEW I had them, but I hated how I doubted myself for just a second because I was so used to this type of gaslighting. After she realized she couldn't get away with the lie, she played the guilt card again. It was in my best interests. It was because she loved me and was worried. BULL.SHIT. You just fucking lied to my face! You're just trying to cover your ass. What she did was complete disrespect for my boundaries and agency. And that's just one example out of my entire frickin LIFE.

Sue also always made everything about herself. When my flight to Albany for the bar exam was canceled, I panicked, had a meltdown, and cried. Of course, later, Sue would keep saying she was so distraught for me that she also cried. Cool?? Okay??? What, you want a cookie for that or something? Why are you telling me this five times? (I’m not kidding, I counted, it was at least five times.) Or whenever I was having a depressive episode about my abuse, she made it about herself. Oh, she couldn't get up for three days when she first found out, she was so distraught. It was so hard for her to work on my case. Coolcoolcool, okay, well, it was MY BODY HE TOUCHED SO IMAGINE THAT. I used to feel so terrible, and seeing how much it upset her was the one thing that made my sexual abuse really feel intolerable. Now I just want to light Sue on fire every time I think about it. Or any time I was depressed at all, she turned it into a competition. No support, no love. Just, "You don't have a reason to be depressed, if anyone it's ME." OKAY BRO, MORE THAN ONE PERSON CAN BE DEPRESSED, IT'S NOT IDEAL AND IT SUCKS BUT IT'S POSSIBLE!!!!

God and she was so HYPOCRITICAL. One year, I forgot Mother’s Day because first, I think these stupid consumerist holidays are a hollow scam, and second because I was writing a brief for the immigration judge on an asylum case. It was a big case that was very important and could change the landscape. I wasn’t going to slack and throw it. Of course, Sue gets extremely upset despite seeing me work on this nonstop since I got home a week prior or whenever, and later goes into complete screaming neurosis again. Yet, on my birthday, she picked a fight with Dan and turned into an army of screaming banshees and I hid in my room all day to avoid the chaos and her wrath, yet I never complained. And then after she drove out and came back, I played therapist. Did I hold it against her? No, no I didn’t, and the fight really was over something trivial. Yet if I forget Mother’s Day because I’m working on a pressing case, she must once again unleash the army of banshees. I’m really not exaggerating, I cannot begin to describe how she screams, not even my two toddler cousins can match her in volume, harshness, or intensity.

Sue made me play marriage counselor, mediator, and therapist for her. It was the worst. First of all, if you have marriage problems, maybe don’t turn to your child when they’re like 12. Go find a marriage counselor. And stop coming to me every time you have a tantrum (I can’t say fight because it’s always just a one-sided screaming match). Stop unloading on me one-sidedly all the time, it’s not even a conversation anymore when you don’t listen to anything I have to say and just talk about whatever the fuck you want. And stop dragging your husband in front of your children, go get a neutral party for that and stop manipulating us to turn against him. It was always so uncomfortable when she did that. We’d separately tell him in private that we didn’t agree, but any time we tried to really stand up to Sue, she’d start the crazies. Screaming, hitting people, slamming doors, dangerous driving, you name it. I should’ve let her kill herself in a car crash, but that would endanger someone else who doesn’t deserve that.

And there was just the general lack of support for my chosen career path. She always said she never pushed me in any direction and let me choose, but she fails to recognize that "barely tolerating" does not equal actual support. Actually, you can't even say she was tolerating. She didn't like that I wanted to go into public interest. She kept telling me people were going to lie and cheat me, even though there isn't really a way for my clients to cheat me out of anything, just as a practical and logistical matter. She encouraged Dan to join her in speaking about my path like it was some gross fly that had been smeared onto their windshield. I never broke confidentiality, but they would act like they knew my clients and would make disparaging remarks about them simply based on stereotypes and assumptions. When I first got the offer to go to Ghana, I didn't tell her for a week because I knew it would not go over well. When I did finally break the news to her, she pulled out ALL the stops. Crying, guilt-tripping, making it about herself. "Why do my children do this to me?????" she bemoaned. Jesus hell, lady, it's not about you, I’m not doing anything to you I’m just moving to Accra for work. Even if I die in this line of work (which I WON’T??) it’s like, I’m an adult who can make decisions about the direction of my life, sucks. And then she encouraged Dan to disparage Ghana based on stereotypes about the entire continent of Africa. I was going to a "wasteland," and they always said it with such vehemence and force behind their words. That was the truly ugly part, their tone of voice. I corrected them multiple times, saying Ghana was actually quite green, there were beaches, forests, and waterfalls, and that there is actually a sizable Chinese expat community and that I have contacts in Accra and the city is very friendly. My words always fell on deaf ears because they - especially Sue - insisted on their narrow world view. And the irony is Sue always told me I have no life experience, but it honestly seems like the other way around. She told me to buy travel insurance when I need expat insurance. Those two are indeed different things, and it definitely matters which one I get. Don't be stupid, you don't have any life experience.

Oh and she keeps asking for money, like 30k, for costs of raising me and sending me to school. Lmao that bitch can go fuck herself, if anything the ho owes me for IIED.

In conclusion, Sue is a crazy bitch who never should have had children and needs to be contained.

[katiemulvihillxo-blog]

12 June 2017

My luck ever going to change? This morning, me and Jord walked to the doctors and jords medication is getting brought down when he comes home, yay!!! Came back and we cuddled, lying there I knew saying goodbye won’t be easy. We lie there and I feel him trying to rub my belly and even though I hate when he does it, I love that he loves what I hate! He can accept me when I can’t even accept myself! He is so lovely and I love him so much. Anyway, went for my driving lesson today, I have gotten so much better, I’m so worried though when I start driving alone that something bass going to happen!! ;Right got back and got ready, put jords clothes in the wash and headed to town. Thought I'd give him a wee blowjob as a going away present but I can't even do that anymore. I used to be good, like really good? Now I can't even make him cum without him having to wank a bit. What's wrong with me? Apart from that Lovely wee walk, just chatting shite to him. Right I’ll continue this later because ed sheeran - kiss me is on tele and I know I’m going to start crying again. Got myself together now, I’ll crack on. So in town, got Jord shorts and stuff for his laundry then headed back. Got to jords and tension with Jord started to build. But let’s face it, it was inevitable. So I’ve being dying for a date night for months, like ever since we’ve started dating, we’ve never really had a date since our first date so I’ve being mad for us just to do something. Something other then sitting in a pub somewhere watching Jord look on Facebook or reply to some group chat. Firstly, was meant to go to the zoo, that got cancelled because of jords work meeting, which I completely understand! After that we were meant to go bowling and Martha’s but that got cancelled because he had to go to a funeral that he didn’t even want to go to but only went for a McDonald’s breakfast, don’t understand that excuse but I’d of accepted it if he had rearranged the date night. Anyway, we were then meant to go odyssey and do the whole bowling thing there, well that got sacked for Hatfield, obviously. And today was out final chance for a date before he went away. Well every other girlfriend got a date day before their boyfriends headed out? Gemma went beach and bowling and shit, aoife went for a meal, Jodie went for a meal and day out etc, but in between all the last min rushing around I was hoping to have a bit of time with my boyfriend so wanted to go parlour for lunch. Got to parlour and all he did was sit on his phone and text into his group chat, only conversation I think he made was how he didn’t like Long Island iced tea cocktail (because that’s what I was drinking) and how he was sweaty when he took off his jacket. I didn’t care at the time because I thought “well there’s still time”, but I hadn’t even finished my last slice of pizza and he’d invited Aaron. Like I really wouldn’t of minded if it was a wee bit later but seriously? Even the time we had together between Aaron walking to parlour weren’t together because he spent the whole time on the phone to his ma and Granney, which I don’t mind, but how was I meant to know that would literally be the last proper moment we would have together (other then when it all kicked off). Aaron arrived, it was grand, the three of us just chatted, it was alright actually, even though it was meant to be our time I didn’t really care once I was one pitcher down. Got half way down the second pitcher and the boys found out the rest of the boys were drinking at the crown. Both of them had finished their drink and obviously, Aaron probably feeling like a third wheel wanted to join the others, fair enough, but so did Jord. It was soo predictable, this so called date would be rushed so he could get out and meet them boys. To be fair, I didn’t really care, if he’d just let me finish my pitcher and go back, have a cuddle and a kiss and say our goodbyes but nope, weren’t gonna happen. Obviously he couldn’t wait for me to finish my pitcher so he goes “I’m away to the toilet”. 5 mins go. Thought he was away for a shite. 10 mins go. Thought he was getting a Guinness. 15 mins go. Snapchat him, see where he’s away too. 20 mins later. I got a snapchat of Jord away. Fucking stood up and abandoned??

Id been fucking stood up. Can’t fucking believe it, boyfriend of over 18 months stood me up to go and sit in a piss smelling pub with 11 other boys talking the same shite they always do: football, college and birds. Like I couldn’t believe at first, thought he might be away getting me a surprise or something so walked back to mine.

Walked into my room and there he was, standing, packing a suitcase. What was he hoping for? That the washing was dry so he could pack his bag and leave with me still sitting at parlour? When I confronted him about it, he had the audacity to say it was because “I’d been so negative about his holiday”. Right, if he had any clue, he knows I’m the complete opposite. Yes I’ve been nagging him about making sure he eats enough because I don’t want him ruining his holiday like his night at Hatfield. Yes, I’ve been nagging about not spending much because I know he ain’t got the money for rent and all so don’t want him wasting his hard earnt money on a few pints which last a few mins when he wants to buy an Xbox which he’d prefer next year. Yes I’ve been nagging about brothels and strip clubs but let’s face it, most boys holidays always end up on strip clubs or something, I know he wouldn’t want me in it the other way around, and plus them places are so dodgey in them countries, something will end up bad. Yes I’ve been nagging about how he weren’t ready, well what was I meant to say “oh yeah go ape!”, yeah right, a few weeks ago he was breaking down regularly, and only a few nights ago he was crying about how I could do better and everyone would be better off without him. So yes obviously I’m concerned, can’t see how people aren’t seeing the same thing I’m seeing? Yes, there’s a tonne of other things I nagged about but me nagging him weren’t for my benefit, I hate nagging him, I just wanted to make sure we had some holiday boundaries and he knew what he can and can’t do. I asked him ages ago if we could have a talk about it and he said no so obviously if we had that I would’ve got it all off my chest and wouldn’t be repeating myself.

Also, he started going on about how I’ve been so negative about this holiday that he doesn’t want to go any more? He must’ve been daydreaming a lot recently because all I’ve done is so good things for this holiday. I started looking for his holiday shorts before he did. I offered to get them for him a month before he even seen them in the shop! Offered to do his laundry. Offered to go to the post office to sort out his card. Got travel adapters. Awk just other things too but can’t be bothered to list them. He started talking then about my happiness or something, not gonna quote exactly cos I can’t even remember, all I remember was screaming at him and how this has been a hard year for me too, crying myself in my sleep, in the shower, just always feeling alone, how I can’t even make the man I love happy and more. I stormed out and sat in the kitchen, thank god I left my inhaler out there, because got myself in a wee asthma attack.

Got myself together and went back into the room, he’s lying there on his God damn phone still texting them boys. I didn’t want him to leave on bad terms, if anything bad happened I wouldn’t be able to live with myself even if I done nothing wrong. Came into bed and explained myself. He didn’t really want to admit that I was in the right but I knew I was. I explained how the holiday would be good for him and he started saying how I thought he weren’t ready.

Anyway, somewhere between Jord trying to realise I was in the right and him checking on his fucking washing every two minutes (yes, even when I was in tears he was dying to leave me for pinting), I just broke down and cried. I tried explaining how everything I do, I do to help people. All I tried to do was help him with this holiday and he took it for granted and threw it in my face, just like everyone else lately.

Niamh had the cheek to fucking complain about jeans in soak lying in the sink and how I don’t respect her. There’s more then 1 fucking sink in this flat?! Don’t use that as an excuse to be an unhygienic bitch and not brush your teeth. She’s so quick to forget every thing good I’ve done, I washed and folded her clothes the other day, and the state of her knickers, I did not want to be touching them, and especially her Granney bra etc, I cleaned out the kitchen and everything, actually I’m not even going to start on Niamh because she’s just an ungrateful cow sometimes.

Lauren too, was meant to be going for drinks tonight because I haven’t seen her in so long and I want to keep her in the loop. Cut a long story short, she bailed on me to “cook her family dinner” and have a doctors appointment tomorrow. Anyway, ends up everyone’s snapchats covered in her house with a load of her mates sitting chilling.

Liam, Dylan and Steve, always tried to help them, cleaned there house for them to mess it up the next day, if they wanted anything I would give it to them, spent soo much money on cleaning supplies for that house, awk and just being there trying to chat to them when everyone else locked themselves in their rooms and now they don’t even give me the time of day.

There’s so much more but this ain’t a bitching journal

I just feel so alone sometimes. I’ve made such an effort to get to know people and try to make friends and no body takes me on. Just wanted someone so I weren’t so reliant on Jord and gave him some space, don’t like suffocating him. Anyway no matter how much I try, everyone pies me. Is it me? Like I know I’m shite to be around lately but there must be someone to give me the time of day? Thought it might be cos I’m English at the start but there’s customers in the shop who’s English and they have people?

It’s so shit because I just don’t know where I belong now? I like being here but I feel so alone and then when I escape to London I feel even more alone, between everywhere I don’t know where I belong other then the pub rn.

I’m not even going to bother talking about that Shite anyway because it’ll just get me started again.

Back to it anyway I was lying there crying and bless poor Jord he didn’t know what to do. Don’t think he realised anything was wrong really. He kept saying how I don’t need anyone because I have him. Well this week shows I do need someone because he ain’t always going to be here for me is he?

Problem is everyone over here just sticks to their school mates, no one likes change so where I have no one from school here, I’m just alone.

I can’t tell him everything either because sometimes there’s things like he just won’t understand from my perspective so I sometimes just need to chat to someone else to calm me down and talk sense into me.

Anyway I cried and cried on jords chest, I felt awful because it’s the worst timing to burst out with all this after its been building up for so long. Like last time I burst out with this was that time I had the pregnancy scare and I screamed in front of Gemma and Dylan and all how I would’ve actually loved to of been pregnant just so I would feel less alone, everyone washed it off because they probably thought I was drunk but I wasn’t even, just emotional and let things boil up. Same happened today I guess, just everything getting on top of me. Like I don’t want him to go on holiday and have to worry about me so I just feel so bad for this all to happen with this wee crying fit and that it’s going to be an awkward 10 days if he remembers me as that wreck. This morning I done my hair and make up and tan so he would remember me as half decent looking before he went, now he’s gonna remember me as some slob who can’t stop crying oh god.

Granted, I give Jord brownie points for calming me down, but all he really did was give me a kiss and a cuddle and my fag (and nicked my fag ffs). But still, he was still packing his suitcase when I hadn’t finished my wee fit, like I understand his friends were waiting on him but it was only for pints? Surely that could’ve waited until I had at least stopped crying? Like half the boys weren’t even off the 212 at that stage, there was time like, even that his flight didn’t leave for another 16 hours, plenty of time? I’m not blaming him cos I know he’s just excited for his holiday but it’s not the first time he’s left me to go somewhere for a couple of days while I’m alone crying, not even the second. That’s why I need someone else other then Jord to make me feel less alone and for me to go cry to too so it’s not left on him.

Anyway said our goodbyes and off he went, this was about half 8 ish. It weren’t until just after he left I literally realised again that he stood me up to go pinting with his friends and I really shouldn’t be crying over him if he could do that to me. But knowing me, once I start, I won’t stop crying once I’ve said something, it’s like opening the floodgates and it’s just going to keep coming till it’s all out and then I’ll be grand again. I didn’t help myself with the tele I was watching, every show had to have some kind of romantic scene with some kind of soppy music that would set me off again.

This diary so looking so bleak lately no wonder I had a mini breakdown, need something to perk me up ffs.