#pd fic

[ughtoomanyfandoms]

Preacher's Daughter (The Last of Us - Joel Miller): Thoroughfare

PREACHER’S DAUGHTER Thoroughfare

series masterlist

Pairing: Joel Miller x OC

CONTENT WARNINGS: 18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI

Series Warnings: unprotected sex, religious trauma, gore, violence, swearing, explicit content, sexual violence.

Word Count: 8.9k

Read on AO3 and Wattpad

Tommy was gone. Tess was gone. Bill and Frank were gone. Lianne was gone.

Lianne was gone.

Joel is alone. Alone with a fourteen year old girl, tasked with trekking her across the country for the “fucking Fireflies.”  The one thing he had hated about his brother. The one thing he prayed Lianne wouldn’t fall in with. And it had sucked him right into it. 

Joel and Ellie had spent the night nestled in the woods a few miles from Bill and Frank’s house. Joel sipped on the coffee that was promised by Lianne.

How long had it been since Lianne was at Bill and Frank’s before Joel found them? Did she know already? Had she stayed with them until the end? How close behind her were Joel and Ellie?

Ellie had stuck her nose into the percolator to take a strong whiff, turning pale in a recoil at the smell. She let out a wretched noise, contorting her face in disgust as she quickly closed the lid to the coffee percolator, pulling Joel’s attention back to her.

He twists to look over his shoulder, brows shooting up as he examines her scrunched face.

“You don’t like coffee?” Joel asks the young girl, voice gravely in a gentle surprise.

“Is this that shit they used to sell at Starbucks in the QZs?” She had asked him, face still scrunched in a pained grimace.

“It was a lot fresher than this, but yeah,” Joel had responded, voice barely above a gruff grunt.

“You ever go there?” Ellie continued quizzically. “Before?”

“Not really to Starbucks, but to smaller coffee shops,” Joel answered, voice becoming softer. “My wife liked the local-”

“Your wife?” Ellie perks up, face contorting into a whole new expression of surprise. “You? Married? Dude, why haven’t you said anything?”

Her words fall upon deaf ears, Joel turning from her with a grunt.

A memory of her floats across his vision. The golden rays of the morning sun seeped through the cafe window to cast a warm glow around her. Her cheeks were pulled into a smile, full and rosy, laughing at something Joel had said. His thumb had traced the swell of her soft cheeks, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. Her warm and forgetless eyes shined bright, crinkled in the corners.

The thought of her made his stomach turn.

“Forget it,” he chides in Ellie’s direction. He’d let it slip, the mention of Lianne. He had wanted to bring her up earlier, when he and Tess first met Ellie and she had asked if the two of them were together, or when they first reached Bill and Frank’s. He especially wanted to talk about her when he didn’t know what the fuck to do, and knew that she would have the answer. Wanted to bring her up just to keep the memory of her fresh in his mouth. But he had kept his tongue bit, wanting to keep her separate from this journey, as much as his body and soul ached in longing for her to be beside him. She would know what to do. She would know where to go. As much as she would keep him on his toes, she would be there to keep him grounded and his mind level.

—-

Weeks had turned into months of radio silence. The group that Lianne had left with all that time ago no longer existed; people giving up the fight and dying off. And still no sound of Joel. 

Lianne had made it to that safe house in Nebraska about a week ago. In the beginning, she cleared out the town of any infected, ensuring her safety and isolation. Evening passed and morning came - that was the first day. 

She spent what was left of the few remaining candles the first night. After a night of cold darkness with no electricity, Lianne had found some more candles in an old store down the road. The main floor of the house glowed warm, dozens of candles lighting the windowsills, climbing the way up the staircase, and above the fireplace mantle. 

“Let there be light,” she had whispered to herself, a bitter chuckle escaping in harsh breath. She watched the stars that night, just like she had all those years before. And like those years before, a single satellite traced its endless orbit across the sky. And again, it was a beacon of something that was never changing in an ever changing world. And she wished for Joel. 

 Evening passed and the morning came - that was the second day. 

The walls had begun cramping around her. The boarded up windows seemed to pound at her skull. So she’d found an old hammer and began ripping the boards from the window panes, letting the white sunshine flood the first floor. 

The breeze chilled her skin as the sun soaked her bones, and she let herself lay on the wooden floor to bask in the sun. She wanted to find window panes in the old store down the road to replace the no-longer-windows, but installing them wasn’t in her skill set.

That’s a job for Joel, she had thought to herself.

Joel. 

And it hit her like a freight car, a tsunami wave crashing over her and pulling her to the bottom. Grief and guilt and pain and sorrow and frustration and guilt and grief and guilt. It ate at her, gnawed at her soul, clean through to her marrow. And she let it eat her, at first. He never left her mind, not for a moment, not for a second. She bargained with herself, any attempt to convince herself that she made the right decision. Joel was still at the QZ, safe and alive and helping Tess. 

And then she began to pray. To pray for Joel to be there, to be anywhere. To be there in Nebraska with her, or at the QZ in Boston. Just to be alive, anywhere. She prayed for the will to go back to Boston and find Joel in their apartment, to beg him for forgiveness for letting herself leave without him. To beg him for forgiveness for leaving him. 

Evening passed and morning came - that was the third day.

Curtains made from mis-matched and discarded sheets waved in the windowsills, the breeze becoming colder as the winter truly set in. A fire burned constantly under the mantle, and Lianne kept bundled in wool sweaters and a blue suede jacket. She had built a home in the safehouse in Nebraska, a home she often thought that Joel would like to share with her, if they had ever gotten the chance. She sits on the porch, cheeks red from the cold air. Her stomach is full and she is safe.

When she slept at night, she thought of him so hard she swore she could feel his arms wrapped around her, reaching for her through the wall.

And she thought of Sarah. A cavern formed in her chest daring to rip itself in pieces with the emptiness. Longing for those moments in time where the only feared bite was that of a mosquito. 

Evening passed and morning came - that was a countless day.

It was the middle of the night when one of them broke in, snarling and rotten and climbing up her with rotten teeth. A hoard had followed, swiftly overtaking the house. The curtains were pulled from the windows with ragged fingernails.

She had tipped the bottles of kerosene over in the fight, drawing the hoard to the center of the house, before making a break to dash outside. She lit the end of a rag soaked in a liquor bottle and threw it to the house. The few that followed her outside were slain in a moment, but she knew more would come. She stood still for a moment, becoming a witness and watching the fire before her. Her feet pushed her tired body through the snow, sprinting westward through the night at an unstoppable pace, her lungs burning and threatening to burst.

Evening passed and morning came - that was the last day.  

— 

It was the smell he noticed first, nose crinkling at its harshness as he and Ellie walked through the woods. There’s this smell, like rainwater, burnt grass, burning plastic and, rotting wood, rotting… something. The smoke from a burning fire had been wafted through the air and into the woods where the two of them were.

“What’s that smell?” Ellie said, nose turned up in equal disruption. “Is something on fire?”

“Yeah,” Joel responds, a brief cloud of smoke catching his eye above the treeline. It doesn’t hit him at first, a sense of nervousness slowly washing its way over him. It breeches upon him like a warm wave, begging to drag him under. The forceful movement of his legs is the only thing keeping himself from sinking into the feeling.

They break from forest, the treeline receding from them in the background, as they further themselves into a clearing that has since been overgrown with brush. Joel comes to a halt, Ellie almost bumping into his backside with her lack of attention, before she stands right outside his peripheral.

A feeling Joel hasn’t felt in many years overwhelms him. It creeps through him at first, an icy cold freezing its way through the veins of his arms. Paralyzed and eyes wide, his heart thumps heavily in his chest. His eyes scan the doubly deserted town in front of him, the town in the middle-of-nowhere Nebraska that he, Tommy, and Lianne had built a safe house in. The safe house that lingered at the edge of the town, just far enough away and just close enough. The safe house that was now a smoldering ash, the roof of it collapsed in on itself, smoke from past flames lingered in a plume. 

Joel begins to break through the brushed clearing, Ellie instinctually following him as he pushes his thick legs through the tangled vegetation. She only fell still when Joel’s pacing became incessant, his face locked in a scowl as his brows folded over his eyes, but the whites of his eyes still showed in panic. She stood there watching, helpless, as Joel’s racing mind materialized into endless, pacing circles around the crumbling house.

Charred, black bodies littered the foundation of the exposed house. Joel’s gut began to churn at his inability to tell if they had been infected or not. Or if she could be one of them.

Ellie’s incessant badgering of unrelenting questions barely registered to Joel, her words brushing over him as his ears rang. 

“Was your wife supposed to be here?” Ellie called to Joel, and he finally stood still. 

His haunched hackles pulled back as he squared his chest, lifting his head taller, as her words finally hit him. His glowered lifelessly into the distance, vision focusing on nothing as the edges of it fuzzed black, before he turned around to march back to Ellie. His shoulder brushed hers, and at his closeness Ellie could finally see the blacks of his eyes. 

“We’re done here,” he growled as he pushed past her. And she’s right on his tail again, questions picking back up from where they left off, even though she knew she’d only be answered with silence. But still, she persists.

He continues to march them westward into the dipping sun, not stopping when Ellie begs for him to let them rest for the night. He’s silent, the crunch of dried leaves and feet on hard snow drowning out Ellie’s voice to his deaf ears. 

It elicits something in Ellie, the smallest prick of fear not about Joel, but for Joel. When they’d lost Tess, Joel had remained silent until Ellie confronted him, urging him to work out his shit. But now was different; the air around him was hostile, walls never seen before barricading him from her. There was no key to unlock Joel, no way to break down that wall he unknowingly forced back up. The strongest of flames couldn’t lick away at his walls. 

With Joel pushing them as far into the night as he can, Ellie fears he might not make it back from this one. It doesn’t get him until the next day, a fearsome grip clasping around his heart and squeezing with a vice so strong it has him gasping for breaths. He’s doubled over, hand resting on a tree as he grips at his jacket in an attempt to relieve his lungs. Ellie’s panicked words are drowned out by the sudden ringing of his ears.

I’m okay, he mumbles repeatedly, trying to convince himself as he levels his breathing.

“But are you okay?” Ellie asks, her voice finally breaking through to him. “Because just a reminder that if you’re dead, I’m fucked.”

Joel only grumbles a response, something that sounds like he’s okay, that it was just the cold air all of a sudden. Ellie watches him rise from the tree, her heart pounding just as quickly as Joel’s. It created a fear in her, one that sparked as a tiny flame in her chest, and she wouldn’t let it grow further than that, not wanting it to burn the whole forest down and take the two of them with it.

— 

Joel held his brother in his arms. When Tommy was born, Joel was one of the first to hold him. The immediate sense of protecting and belonging overtook him then, holding his tiny brother in his arms. The world gave Tommy to Joel to protect and to save, and Joel will kill to succeed.

He held his brother in his arms now, again, decades later in the middle-of-nowhere Wyoming. A hug like the first, of love and disbelief, and of never knowing of the chance to do it again. Joel had found his brother, after months of on-foot travel across the country, he found his brother, and the hope that came with it glistened brightly in his eyes.

And now, Tommy was taking care of Joel. Filling his stomach with warm food, welcoming the young girl Joel traveled with with generous hospitality, and letting him relax in the protection of Jackson.

“How ‘bout a tour?” Tommy asks, finally, the question gnawing at him since his brother arrived. Tommy’s wife, Maria, had sat rigid next to him, eyes staring Joel down. The tension rose in him gradually as he watched his brother and Ellie scoop copious amounts of food into their mouths. “Somethin’ I think you’re gonna wanna see.”

Tommy and Maria led the way down the main street of Jackson, Joel and Ellie lingering a few paces behind them as they followed. Dozens of people lined the street, shop owners leaning against the entrances to their stores as they lazily waited for customers. Shouts of children down the street were cheery and free. Joel’s senses were in overdrive, vision becoming tunnel-like as he tried to focus on what Maria was saying.

“So are you, like, in charge?” Ellie speaks up as they pass what Maria told them was a church of multifaith.

“No one person’s in charge,” Maria begins to explain. “I’m on the council. Democratically elected, serving 300 people, including children. Everyone pitches in. We rotate patrols, food prep, repairs, hunting, harvesting. Everything you see in our town… the greenhouses, livestock, is all shared. Collective ownership.”

“So, uh,” Joel chirps up. “Communism.”

“Nah,” Tommy lets out with a scoff. “Nah, it ain’t like that.”

“It is that,” Maria interjects matter-of-factly. “Literally. This is a commune. We’re communists.”

Tommy hesitantly looks back at Joel, casting a dejected gaze towards the ground. Joel’s eyes glint with amusement, casting a smirk towards his grimacing brother. 

“Tommy!” A voice calls from somewhere behind them. “Wait up a second!”

Joel swears he’s made it up, the voice calling for Tommy only in his head. It’s a voice Joel would know anywhere. Even in death he would have the melodic voice memorized, praying it would be the last sound he heard. It sounded foreign at first, like a long lost memory that lingered on the tip of his tongue leaving a heavenly aftertaste. Only, he heard this voice in his dreams, kept it with him daily in fear of ever forgetting. 

Tommy was the first to turn to face the calling of his name, and Joel the second, eyes scanning the town square to see where the possible voice came from. 

A woman stands on the other side of the square, hand raised in the air in a wave. Her cheeks are rosy and full, pulled up into a smile, and her eyes twinkle in the sunshine. When she knows Tommy sees her, she turns to quickly finish a conversation with a man next to her before making her way towards them.

When her gaze shifts from Tommy to his brother, she freezes in her tracks, the small smile fading quickly as her face goes pale.

Joel’s heart thuds loudly in his ear and his tunnel vision returns, locking on her. He blinks, convinced she’s a mirage, a hallucination, an angel appearing before him. But she stays planted, and Joel feels faint. A blush creeps along the tips of his cheek, turning him crimson and his neck begins to burn.

He remembers her, all those years ago, an unknowingly frightened thing in the road, eyes glistening as her hands shook with her emptied pistol. How she had been a complete shell of any part of her that used to be.

She stands there, now, put together, and from a distance is seemingly untouched. Her cream, knitted turtleneck stands out compared to the navy canvas jacket that blends in with the darkened buildings of Jackson. Her dark hair curls around her shoulders as if she’s taken the time to put a curling iron to it, scarce strands of silver wisp their way through it.

Her breath had hitched in her throat, before becoming almost ragged as she took small, stuttered gasps. 

Their hearts stutter in their chests like two doves in two cages, screaming to be let out. The rhythm pushes against their chests, pulling at their ribs to finally move their feet forward. Joel doesn’t move until she takes her first steps, and his knees buckle under him as he finally steps towards her. His feet land heavily on the ground below, but he feels as if he’s walking on air.

Two waves crash against each other, tectonic plates shifting in the core of the earth, as the two of them finally collide. Limbs wrapping around them, hands latching into place to hold each other close. 

“The house-” Joel starts, pulling back to let his eyes desperately search hers as he holds her face in his hands.

“I know,” Lianne gasps. “The radio- You stopped-” 

“I know, I’m sorry,” Joel whispers, only to her, hands desperately brushing the hair out of her face to make sure she’s still real. “I left a message…”

“It doesn’t matter,” she smiles the smallest, most gentle smile, and oh, how his world spins. A smile not seen in years, a smile that shines bright, a smile that pulls at her cheeks and pulls the corners of her eyes into crinkles. A smile that has Joel’s eyes shining with the beginning of unfalling tears. 

He knew he had no right to touch her, crave her like air, but he did both. And when he put his mouth on hers, he recognized the taste of her, like she’d been made just for him. And he kissed her. He kissed her with all the power he could muster, making up for the months, weeks, days, minutes, seconds their lips hadn’t been touching. And finally, finally, it felt like her world was no longer burning around her. The forest fire within her subdued in his arms.

“Why didn’t you tell me about her as soon as we got here?” Joel asks Tommy, brows furrowing in mock-frustration, but the curl at the corners of his lips says otherwise.

“Figured we should get some food in ya first,” Tommy says with a slight smile. “Didn’t want the old man collapsin’ on us.”

“We can give you two some time to catch up,” Maria says, her smile friendly but her gaze still hesitant towards Joel. “Make that man get a shower. I’ll take Ellie to our place where she can freshen up, get some warm clothes.”

Joel’s focus remains solely on Lianne, he doesn’t hear Ellie’s quiet and confused protest when she calls out his name.

“You’ll be fine,” he says softly, finally turning his gaze to the young girl. She still stands there, frozen, with Maria gesturing for her to follow. “Go on, you’ll be fine.”

“Wait,” Lianne murmurs, barely above a whisper as her eyes finally connect on Ellie’s hunched figure. Lianne’s eyes gleam in interest as they gauge from the young girl and then back to Joel. She nods to Ellie as she asks, “Who’s this?”

Joel turns, almost too quickly, to look at Ellie. Her face is pale with nervousness, cheeks rosy from the chilled air. She’s looking at Joel with pleading eyes, silently begging him for some kind of reprieve as her thumb picks at her ratted glove.

“Ellie,” Joel says softly, the whisper of a smile in his voice. “Lianne… This is Ellie. Ellie…” Joel’s voice falls short, head turning as he looks back to Lianne to make sure she’s still there. “This is Lianne… my wife.”

“Oh…” Ellie murmurs, brows raising in realization. “Well, shit. You didn’t say she was-”

“Ellie-” Joel grunts at her in disapproval, but the sweetening sound of the laugh from the woman next to him has his gaze pulling to her again. Lianne gently brushes past him, a faint but warm smile radiant on her lips, and gently sticks her hand out as she reaches the young girl.

“Hi, Ellie,” Lianne says gently. “It’s nice to meet you.”

Ellie’s voice is barely above a murmur as she greets Lianne in response, eyes casting down towards where their hands meet. 

“How’d you get on Joel’s good side?” Lianne asks the young girl, a teasing lilt to her voice.

Ellie only smiles awkwardly, eyes shifting past Lianne towards Joel.

“I’ll explain,” Joel says. “Later.”

Maria approaches Ellie again, continuing to lead her away from Joel and Lianne. Joel only gives Ellie a nod, reassuring her that she’s safe with Maria. Lianne quietly leads Joel back to her house, a house that she can’t help thinking of the possibility of becoming a home with Joel.

“So,” Lianne finally says, a gleam in her eyes as she turns in Joel’s direction. “Who’s Ellie?”

Joel rubs at his hands, thinking of a response to give her. So, he tells her that Ellie’s cargo, some Firefly big-wig’s daughter he’s taking out west. He lies to her, and she knows it. It will have to do, for now.

“Surprised Tess ain’t with y’all,” Lianne responds simply. She teases him by adding, “Before I left, told her to keep you in check while I was gone.”

Joel slows his steps before finally coming to a stop. Lianne continues a few paces before turning back to check on Joel. Her smile fades when she clocks his expression. His brows are furrowed again, eyes not willing to meet hers as he casts them away to his feet. When he finally meets her gaze, his dark eyes are soft and somber, pools of regret swimming through a current to beg for forgiveness. A grip takes its place around his throat, tightening until it choked him. 

When his eyes meet hers, she knows Tess is gone. And all she can do is nod.

“How?” She asks.

“Got bit,” Joel finally pulls the words from himself. “Saved me and the kid, though.”

“Good,” Lianne responds again with a nod. “That she saved you.”

Joel nods, too.

“Bill and Frank, too,” Joel says. “Got your message ‘bout you stayin’ there, thought I’d stop by too with the kid after… Tess. See if you’d maybe be there. Bill left a letter.”

Lianne stands quietly for a moment, grinding her teeth and chewing the inside of her lip. 

“I’m sorry,” Joel offers, quietly.

“Me too,” is all she says as she nods again, before turning to lead him further down the street to her house. “Frank was in pretty bad shape when I was there.”

It’s a two-story house, like the one in Austin. Unlike the house in Nebraska, the porch doesn’t wrap all the way around the four sides of the structure. Instead, the dark fencing of the wooden porch is shortened to cover half of the front of the house, stopping where it connects with gray paneling. Another porch matches this one on the back of the house, facing a well-sized backyard and renovated garage. A white picket fence outlines the perimeter of the property, and Lianne had chuckled when she first moved in at the idea of that cherry-pie kind of life.

Lianne leads Joel in through the front door and the smallest hint of clean laundry mixed with old coffee wafts through the air to soak into Joel. It could make him breathless, the trigger of a memory of their home in Austin flashing briefly before him, only to be replaced by the dim surroundings of this unfamiliar structure. 

“Do you, uh, wanna shower or anything?” Lianne finally speaks, scratching mindlessly at a spot on her cheek. “Not sayin’ you need one or anything.”

“‘S a good idea,” he replies quietly. “I’d appreciate that.”

Lianne only nods and leads him up the staircase to the second floor. She pushes a door open on the right, and a sunlit room with a simple spread is on the other side. A bed with linen sheets and a blue patterned quilt, a pile of worn clothes tossed over a chair in the corner.

Her bed is made, only one side sloped in and the edges ruffled, while the other side lay perfectly neat and barren. A side saved for him.

“I feel like all this ain’t really mine,” she says, almost as if she’s explaining her tidiness. “Gotta keep it lookin’ nice for Maria.”

Joel chuckles softly, a whisper of a laugh, watching her sweep a hand over the quilt to soothe out a wrinkle, before she’s back in front of him. 

“So,” she starts again. “Who really is Ellie?”

“She’s immune,” the words are out of his mouth before he can even think to hold them in. His eyes widen in panic, while Lianne’s stay calm and curious.

“To what?” She asks, just a breath away from a confused chuckle.

But Joel stays silent, and her brow furrows.

“She’s immune,” she repeats his words slowly back to him.

“It was Marlene,” Joel starts, mouth moving faster than his braind. “She hired us to smuggle her to some Fireflies. I’ve seen the bite on her arm. I’ve seen her get bitten. And that was months ago. She’s immune.” 

Lianne only stares at him, his words rolling through her head like a pearl. He can see the gears turning behind her eyes, the scale of judgment of belief or disbelief. His heart pounds in his chest, that fear coming over him again in an icy grip.

“Okay,” Lianne replies. Her voice is soft, eyes warm again as she looks up at Joel. “So what’s next?”

“I don’t know,” Joel breathes, the words falling from him on a gasp. 

“Okay,” she says again.

She reaches instinctively to help Joel from his canvas jacket, fingers gently pulling the fabric from him as if the slightest move would spook him like a wounded animal. His gaze follows her movements, soft eyes never blinking her away as he continues to track her. She finally slips the sleeves off his wrists, and the broad expanse of his shoulders takes her breath away. When she finally looks up to meet his eyes, they reflect that same longing and lonesome she’s found herself in since September. The softness of his dark eyes remind her of October, of a chill that can only be subdued by the warmth of him.

She puts her hands on either side of his face, and the room falls away. Joel had always gotten lost in the kisses shared between them, but never quite like this, like a fever taking its grip. And then, the space between them explodes. His heart keeps missing beats and his hands cannot bring her close enough to him. He tastes her and realizes he’s been starving and it burns him alive.

Maybe it lasts a minute, maybe it’s an hour. Joel only knows this kiss, how soft her skin is when it brushes against his, and that even if he did not know it until now, he had been and would continue waiting for her forever.

“I should shower first,” Joel whispers as he forces himself away from her lips. His forehead remains pressed heavily against hers, just as his fingers dig into her hips. 

“I don’t care,” she whispers back, latching herself onto him once more before he can pull further away. 

His hands are back on her, cupping her face to hold her closer, breathing her in, trying to clear away the fear that she’s not real. She maneuvers them closer to the bed, Joel shoving off her blue suede jacket as her hands push and pull and search across his flannel. Her hands only leave him to pull her turtleneck off and throw it to the floor, revealing a haphazardly buttoned white blouse.

Closer to the bed, she’s pushing him gently to sit, and he obliges. In quick timing, but not quick enough for Joel, she straddles him. His hands immediately land on her waist, strong and heavy, and he pulls her closer on his lap. His hands lose themselves in her hair, entwining themselves with it to pull her into his mouth. 

She kisses him ravenously, the want of each other in the way of flesh wanting to knit itself together over a wound. 

She wondered if he had hated her, when she first left Boston. If he hated her for leaving him there alone, no family but Tess, without the only thing to keep fighting for. If he hated her for her short and shitty messages she left him, or the shitty excuse she gave when she left. She wondered if he hated her, and prayed that she’d never know the answer. 

She pulls the white button-up tauntingly slowly from her shoulders, the warm sun illuminating her exposed chest as he watches her. A stab of hunger came over him, and he found nourishment in the very sight of her. The blouse drops to the floor behind her, and her chest expands with a pull of wanton air. 

His fingers reach up, ghosting along the skin of her chest to leave goosebumps in their wake. He has to drag his eyes to meet hers, and when she sees them they’re black and hungry. His hands wrap around her waist, eyes never leaving hers, as he grips her close to him and flips her over onto her back. She’s pinned between him and the mattress like a flower pressed in a book. 

His lips are on her chest, hungry, wet kisses covering the skin there. He loved her like a rotten dog, drooling and painting and messy. Loved her like his canines were falling out of his gums; like a monster, like a beast. 

She’s wrestled him out of his clothes, the tip of his throbbing cock nudging against the inside of her thigh. He had rocked himself into her hundreds of times, thousands even. Each time different from the last, and just as good as the first. It presses into her wetness, and he holds back from sinking his teeth into her. He could let go right now, just having her underneath him again. She keens for him, hips begging to be split.

Their bones whisper to each other: Where have you been?

I’ve been lost but I’m here now. You’re the only person who has ever been able to find me.

His body is on fire, a fever taking over him as he finds himself nestled within her. The tip of him kisses the deepest part of her, over and over, and she’s panting beneath him. Her hands latch themselves in his hair, grounding herself to him as he loses himself in her.

The air is hot and sticky, suffocating in the small space between them. The airway is narrow, any breath reaching their lungs a soothing relief. 

She says his name, over and over, like it’s the only word written on the pages. Three more heavy thrusts and she’s undone, unbinding herself as she comes around him. Her hand claws into his shoulder, pushing him away and holding him close. Sharp gasps are pushed from her chest, and he breathes them into himself as he rests his cheek against her own. Her back arches, breasts pushing further into his chest. Her pussy squeezes his cock, and the haze in her eyes has him coming inside her. 

He nestles his cheek against her chest, hips coming to a slow still as he stays inside her. A lazy hand runs through his hair, the sweat-damp strands cooling to her rough fingers. They let each other rest, soaking each other in, leaving mindless kisses on each other’s skin.

He finally pushes himself off of her, taking the weight off her chest. He rolls to his side away from her and runs a hand down his face. A soft chuckle comes from her behind him, and he looks over his shoulder to see her flushed state. A smirk grows across his face, and she runs her hand down the length of his back. When her hand leaves him, she pulls her arm back to herself, a solemn look overtaking her features. 

Joel’s smirk drops, a slight frown creasing his brows.

“What?” He calls to her softly.

“I just want to forget,” she says quietly, arms crossing over her stomach.

“What do you want to forget?” he asks, voice soft as he still looks at her over his shoulder, fingers reaching out to trace the edge of her face.

Everything. She wants to forget ever leaving Joel, every moment that had passed without him near her. She only wanted to know Joel, to breathe Joel, to feel Joel.

He watches her eyes, leaning down to press a soft kiss to her swollen lips, eyes never leaving her face.

“How can you even forgive me?” She whispers, and he pulls away from her only to look in her eyes, nose bumping gently against hers, and her chin tips up achingly for the return of his lips. He drags his lips to her forehead, planting a kiss on her damp skin. 

“Because I thought about you,” Joel responds. “Every day and every night. You know there’s nothing you could do that I wouldn’t forgive you for.”

His lips return to her skin, nipping gently at the skin of her jaw. She was his darling, never to be unloved by him, too well tangled with his soul. 

And they make love again - Lianne used to say as she would tease Joel in fake mockery at his use of the term - until the room became golden and the sun hung lower in the sky, hot tears slipping from the edges of her eyes down to her ears to make their home on the pillow. Until she was able to forget.

—

Tommy had been the one to interrupt their brief bubble of paradise, his fists knocking on the front door and luring the two of them down the staircase. That’s how Joel found himself sitting in a bar, the Tipsy Bison, running his hands over the wooden counter, his girl sat at his side while his brother poured him a drink, for the first time in since who knows when. 

“Been a long time,” Joel murmurs, mostly to himself, as he continues to admire the handiwork of the bar top.

“So, what’s up with the kid?” Tommy asks, unable to hold in his curiosity.

Joel takes a sip from the glass in front of him, the bite of it burning down his throat with a wince. 

“Tryna find her family somewhere out here,” another lie. “I was headin’ in this direction anyway, so…”

“Really?” Tommy asks, brows raising in surprise. “Goodness of your heart?”

Joel stares aimlessly into his glass, and Lianne shifts in her seat next to him before swallowing her drink.

“There’s a payment,” Joel says gruffly. “So, you know where they might be? These Fireflies?”

Tommy shakes his head slightly at his older brother, the smallest hint of disbelief laced across his face. 

“Well,” Tommy starts with a sigh. “Heard they got a base down at the University of Eastern Colorado. It’s a week’s ride south. But it is severely fucked up between here and there. Infected… Raiders… It’s not exactly an easy trip.”

“It’ll be easy for us,” Joel says immediately, looking between Lianne and his brother who remains behind the bar. “Seeing as how you can headshot infected from half a mile away. Which is a bunch of bullshit, by the way.”

Tommy finally takes a slow, long sip of his drink, gulping it down harshly with gritted teeth. He slowly shakes his head.

“Yeah, I can’t go,” he says slowly, eyes peering up through his lashes at his brother, afraid of his reaction. 

“Oh, come on,” Joel persists. “I made it across the country. The three of us can make it from here to Colorado.”

Tommy only sighs, looking briefly at Lianne with eyes pleading for help.

“Hey,” Joel says harshly, getting Tommy’s attention back on her. “What, cause your wife won’t let you?”

“Joel,” Lianne’s voice calls to him from his side, a warning in her voice to cool it down.

“She the one that kept you off the radio? Is that why you stopped messaging me back?” Joel presses.

“They’re good people,” Tommy finally interjects. “Didn’t have to take me in, but they did. All they ask is that we follow their rules. They’re very protective of this place, is all. And for good fuckin’ reason.”

“No, I heard,” Joel bites. “Wrong people might show up… Is that what I am? Am I the wrong people?”

“Joel,” Lianne warns again, this time with a sigh. 

“Those things I did,” Joel can’t help the river of relentless words that spill from him. “Tommy, those things that you judge me for, I did those things to keep us alive.”

“We did those things,” Tommy agrees. “But they weren’t ‘things.’ We murdered people. And I don’t judge you for it. We survived the only way we knew how, but there were other ways. We just weren’t any good at ‘em.”

Joel rubs a hand down his face, rubbing the gruff hair that lines his jaw. When he opens his mouth to respond, Tommy interjects.

“I’m gonna be a father,” Tommy says, letting it out as if he had been holding his breath. 

And Joel freezes. He lets his head drop, letting it shake back and forth as he lets out a scoff. Tommy’s face turns red, and his jaw clicks as he squints his eyes at Joel.

“You know what?” Tommy says harshly. “Just because life stopped for you… Doesn’t mean it has to stop for me.” 

Lianne snaps her attention towards Tommy, mirroring him in a squint of disbelief. Joel only remains silent. His eyes go cold as he swallows the rest of his drink, the glass landing heavily back onto the countertop as he pushes himself up from his stool.

“We’ll grab some supplies and be outta your hair in the mornin’,” he grunts before pushing his way to the door of the bar.

Lianne stays planted, gaze remaining piercing on Tommy. His head is hung lowly in instant regret, eyes peering up to meet Lianne’s gaze. Neither of them say anything, and Lianne has to steady herself from flaring smoke from her ears. She pushes herself from her spot at the bar, making her way to follow Joel.

“Lianne,” Tommy calls after her.

“Don’t,” she stops him, boots heavy on the wooden floorboards as she continues her way outside. 

Joel isn’t far from the entrance of the bar when she finds him. He’s bent over, hand gripping the wooden post of a street light right outside the bar. Lianne’s pace quickens as she approaches him, her heart dropping to her stomach when she sees the pale state of him. He’s breathing heavily, fast and gasping breaths fogging in the Jackson sunlight.

“Hey, hey, hey,” Lianne murmurs, immediately resting her hand on his back. “Joel, what’s going on?”

Joel’s hand that’s gripping his chest latches on to her, finding the nearest part of her to bring her closer and hold himself steady. His eyes were glazed, but the tears from the stinging cold kept them sparkling in the sun. He can’t hear her ask if he’s okay, the panic slicing through her voice, his ears ringing again as they did in the woods. Her hand replaces where his was pressed on his chest as she begins to rub soothing circles, trying to get him to stand upright to better get breath in his lungs. She watches his eyes, noticing their locked on something further away, so she follows his gaze. When his breathing finally steadies, Lianne catches a glimpse of a head of dark curly hair amongst a group of people further down the way, and her breath hitches for a moment. The woman in the town center bends down, handing something to a little girl with the same hair. Lianne’s heart breaks when she turns back to Joel.

“I thought the same thing when I first got here,” she says softly, watching Joel take full breaths. “But she really doesn’t look anything like her.”

“She could’ve, though,” Joel finally says, and it breaks Lianne further.

“I’m sorry, Joel,” she whispers.

“I’m okay,” he says, trying to reassure himself. “It’s okay.”

—

Later in the night, the two of them found themselves in a tiny storefront, renovated into a shoe repair shop that was almost always empty. Joel had wanted to fix his torn boots himself, the soul of them peeling from the bottom to reveal his toes. Lianne had insisted she could trade something for a better pair for him, but he refused and refused, insisting he could fix them himself. Joel hadn’t seen Ellie all day, accidentally allowing her to get scooped up by Maria and roped in to a community movie night at the town’s center.

A swift breeze of the cold night air swept through the store as the door opened, a bell jingling as Tommy appeared through the threshold. He smiled awkwardly as he approached the couple, his shoulders tense as he kept them close to his ears and his hands in his pockets. Lianne turned to return his smile before resuming her watchful position on Joel. 

“The guys said I might find you here,” Tommy says as he continues his way over to them, steps slow with caution as he approaches his brother. 

Joel looks up to look at his brother, but quickly resumes the work on his boots.

“I shouldn’t have said what I said,” Tommy continues with a sigh. “I don’t even believe it. It’s complicated for you… And I’m sorry.”

Joel stays silent, this time giving a look to Lianne who quirks an eyebrow at him in return. 

“So you gonna let me off the hook, or what?” Tommy presses.

“This ride to the university,” Joel speaks up suddenly. “Is it a suicide mission?”

Tommy doesn’t answer right away. He looks to Lianne, his composure slightly taken aback in the shift of conversational direction.

“No…” Tommy starts slowly. “It’s dangerous, but it’s nothin’ you can’t handle. Just prepare and do what you do.”

“You’ve had people go that way and come back?” Joel asks again.

Tommy nods. “All of ‘em,” he responds, crossing his hands over his chest. “What is this?”

And Joel tells him, from the beginning. That the leader of the Fireflies hired him and Tess to smuggle her out. After Tess, it was just the two of them. And in Kansas City, Ellie had to save Joel. His face fell suddenly, paling at the memory, eyes growing glassy with tears. He froze then, words coming to a halt, just as he did that afternoon. Just as he did in Kansas City.

“I was so afraid,” he mutters. “I’m not who I was. I’m weak.”

It takes everything in Lianne to not break at the sight, to hold his sweet face in her hands and kiss away the worries. Her heart thrums loudly in her chest, drowning out the sounds of Joel’s words as he continues.

“You want me to take her,” Tommy says, face soft in understanding. 

“I’m just gonna get her killed,” Joel says, voice breaking as he forces the words from his mouth. “I know it. I have to leave her.”

Tommy and Lianne share a knowing look, the conversation having gone in a direction they are too familiar with. 

“This is your chance to bring your kid into a better world,” Joel continues, eyes pleading and voice begging. “You’re younger than me, still strong. You said it yourself, you’ll come back. You have to take her.” 

Tommy sighs, looking around the room before his eyes fall to the floor.

“Tommy, you’re the only one I trust. It’s the last thing I’ll ever ask of you, I swear.”

Tommy looks back to his brother, then to his brother’s wife. She looks equally as broken as Joel, her gaze never leaving him, with her lips turned in a hard frown.

“I’ll take her out at dawn,” Tommy replies.

Back in the house, voices are raised behind the walls, anger laced and spitting with venom. And all Lianne can do is pace her bedroom. She chews on the nail of her thumb, heart pounding as she waits for Joel to return to the room. The voices grow louder, until they’re finally silent.

A door slams, and heavy footsteps grow louder as they step down the hallway.

The door to Lianne’s room swings open, Joel’s gaze falling on her as her pacing comes to a stop. He slowly closes the door, latching it softly behind him.  

He slowly brushes past her, squeezing her hand in passing, before planting himself on the edge of the bed. His head hangs, his hands rubbing circles into his eyes as he rests them on his knees.

“Joel,” she says quietly, kneeling in front of him. Her hands rest on his knees before coming up to rub along the length of his arms.

“I have you,” Joel says suddenly, his eyes pleading to her, his voice trying to convince himself. “That’s all I need.”

“I don’t think that’s as true anymore, Joel,” she says softly, a knowing gleam in her eyes, and his gaze falls to his lap. “You need that little girl, Joel. Just as much as she needs you. You gotta see this through with her.” 

“I just got you back,” Joel replies, voice cracking under the weight of his words. “I can’t leave you again. Ain’t lettin’ you outta my sight.”

Her crumpled face mirrors his own, eyes glossy and brows furrowed, as she takes his face in her hands. The rough pad of her thumb ghosts over the dry skin of his cheek, and he can’t help but close his eyes at the feeling.

“Then I’ll come with you,” Lianne says, her words definitive. “If you’re sure that’s what you’d need, I’ll go with you.” 

He takes her hands from his face, running over the lines of her palm that etch across her skin before softly planting his lips onto her calloused palms. 

Lianne laid on her stomach, head fuzzy with sleep. Joel’s hand was splayed on her back, resting lightly above her hip. But he was ridgid next to her. The quiet of Jackson made his head buzz, the ceiling above him swirled in his vision.

She rolled her head towards him, a soft hum radiating from her as she pulled herself closer to his warm body.

“Sleep,” she mumbled, pulling him into her. “It’s safe here.”

She knew what he was feeling, a bit all too well. Like the walls would fall away and they would be back in the middle of the woods, exposed to the elements and the Infected, one twig snap away from a nearing death. 

“You can sleep,” she says. “Sleep in my arms.” 

He felt warm and familiar. He felt solid and safe. But there was something different about him after all their time apart. A man changed, a man who now had less anger in his heart. An anger that had festered for so long, entwining itself with him, that had now been replaced by something all together different. She wanted to cling to his shirt, bury her face into the warm curve of his neck, and never let go. She kissed his neck and shoulders, feeling faint from loving him so much. 

Lianne woke up while it was still dark. Joel had only stirred briefly as she left the bed, quickly falling back asleep once he heard the running water of the shower, the smell of her lingering on her pillow lulling him to sleep. 

It was the toss of her towel on her empty spot in the bed that jerked him awake, eyes snapping wide as he remained frozen. His side of the bed dipped behind his back as her fingers ran softly down his arm. He turned with a groan, reaching out to land his hand on her waist.

“Get a groove on, Miller,” she said softly, hand now brushing the hair from his face.

“‘Time is it?” He groaned again. “‘S still dark.”

“Almost dawn,” Lianne replies in the quiet of the dark. “So get up, get dressed. We’re goin’ to the stables.” 

That was half an hour ago. The golden sunrise had begun to creep over the snow-capped mountains. Joel’s breath lingered in the morning air as he contemplated Lianne’s decision.

“I just ain’t sure about this,” he says, hands still adjusting the straps of the saddle. 

“At least give her the choice,” Lianne tries to persuade. 

Only another moment of silent shuffling passes before the crunches of footfall approach the stable. Tommy and Ellie round the corner, and the young girl stops in her tracks when she sees Joel, a look of disdain weaved over her. 

“You came here to say goodbye, or something?” Ellie tosses sharp words in Joel’s direction. 

“No,” Joel says as he grinds the toe of his boot into the dirt. “We came here to steal these horses and go.”

“I would’ve given you one,” Tommy chirps with a soft shrug.

“I know,” Joel says, still keeping his eyes to the ground. “Anyway, that was thirty minutes ago, and I guess…”

His voice trails off when he finally raises his eyes to Ellie. Her glare is sharp and her jaw is set.

“You deserve a choice,” he finally says. “I still think you’d be better off with Tommy-”

His words are cut off as Ellie shoves her sleeping bag into his arms.

“Let’s go,” she says bluntly.

Joel nods slowly, a soft and assured okay leaving his lips. He helps Ellie up onto his horse, letting her take the reins as he leads them out of the stable. Lianne follows behind on a horse of her own as they head to Jackson’s main gate. 

Tommy gives the three of them directions to the interstate, a small yet knowing smile on his face as he says goodbye to his brother. 

Lianne travels quietly alongside Joel and Ellie, taking in the rambling conversations of the young girl and Joel’s short but giving answers to her. Ellie’s convinced him to teach her how to shoot the rifle Tommy gave them, and to Lianne’s unsurprised surprise, Joel has given in to the young girl.

The three of them find themselves in a small, grassy opening off the side of the road. Joel’s set up a target a few dozen yards away with some old socks stuffed with grass, the word ASSHOLE written on it for encouragement. Ellie complains and complains, saying the target’s too small, or the rifle doesn’t aim right. Joel rolls his eyes, arching his brow in discontempt at Lianne who gives him an amused smile. Joel takes the rifle from Ellie, willing to prove it’s just a skill issue. He talks her through the process, words slow and heavy as he readies himself. 

“You gonna shoot this thing or get it pregnant?” Ellie asks with a smug smirk, and Lianne can’t help but chuckle quietly from the otherside of Joel. Again, Joel raises his glance to Lianne, a look of disappointment that can’t be wiped from him as Lianne nudges him knowingly with her elbow. 

Joel readies himself behind the rifle again, and not a second later has a hole blasted through ASSHOLE. Ellie drops the binoculars she was holding in disbelief, the smug smirk once on her face completely gone and transferred to Joel.

“You dick,” she hisses slowly. 

The three continue on horseback, the sun lowering in the sky. Ellie had braved enough to ask Lianne about herself, who she was before the outbreak, how she met Joel (which Joel changed topics immediately), which Ellie followed up with asking Lianne what her role was in the Boston QZ. 

Lianne found herself happy to answer Ellie’s questions, giving as much of herself to her as she could. The feeling of making up for lost time had taken hold of her thoughts, feeling she needed to be on the same level of Joel in connection to the young girl. 

A warm yellow silhouetted the three, riding over rolling hills and dipping into shallow valleys. Lianne rode ahead of them, stopping atop a high mound of land to take in the sunset. Joel stopped next to her, crinkled eyes softening as he watched her. She sat content on her horse, warm sun dripping off her like honey. She turned to him, cheeks pulling into an equally warm smile as her cheeks rosened. Joel couldn’t help but mirror her smile, and when Ellie peeked out to Lianne from behind Joel, the young girl joined them in a toothy smile. 

Ellie could be the hope for all humanity, hope for the future of the world. But the three of them right here, in this sunset, was all the hope Lianne found she needed.

[best-jrwi-fic-quotes]

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[deanstead]

Marry That Girl

Pairing: Jay Halstead x Reader

Requested: no

Word Count: 600+

Tags/Warnings: none

A/N: Short one because I haven't released something for Jay in way too long! This has been sitting in my WIP drafts for the longest time so I finally got it written! An anon requested something similar for Will but since I had a half-written fic, I finished this and posting this instead! As always thanks to bestie @seatsbythepit for being my beta queen~!

JAY HALSTEAD MASTERLIST

You hadn’t thought this through.

It sounded like an innocent enough date when Jay had asked if you wanted to go watch the game. You hadn't been dating for long, and every day felt a little unreal in a ‘I can’t believe Jay Halstead wants to go out with me’ kind of way, and you appreciated every opportunity you got to spend with Jay especially since you never knew if he would have to go undercover or spend nights at the district trying to clear a case.

But now that the game was approaching, you were in a bit of a panic.

You enjoyed watching a game, but you didn’t always know what you were watching or doing, and you weren’t sure you were ready to let Jay see that side of you.

“Y/N, everything okay?” Kelly’s voice interrupted your internalized panic and you glanced up.

“Ah, I should have thought of you!” You proclaimed, earning yourself an eyebrow raise from the squad lieutenant. “I need your help.”

Kelly raised an eyebrow but chuckled before nodding toward his office.

You thanked all the stars that it was a quieter shift. After all, an entirely quiet shift didn’t exist at Firehouse 51. But at least that’s the way you liked it.

Kelly gave you a crash course, but not without reminding you that you owed him one. You spent the rest of the downtime studying it so that at least you’d have something smart to say, even though there were a few times you wondered what the hell you were doing.

Hard work indeed paid off.

You walked out of the game, feeling a little embarrassed as Jay’s friends gushed over you.

“Jay, you got a good one. My girlfriend doesn’t even want to come to games with me.” One of his buddies quipped.

Jay laughed, putting an arm around you and grinning. “Hey, should I be worried? What if you guys just call her for the games instead?”

The laughter rumbled through the group as they all nodded, teasing Jay that they’d rather call you instead of him in the future.

You really did owe Kelly one.

As his friends dispersed, calling that Jay had better bring you out for the next game, Jay’s phone rang.

You nodded at him, telling him he’d better take it, assuring him that you and Will wouldn’t leave him behind.

Jay took the call from Voight, glancing toward where you and Will were talking as he nodded. “Yeah, I got it. I’ll be right in.”

Jay could feel the dread in his gut, that felt just a little too much like guilt that he had to blow off again tonight even though he’d promised a nice after-game dinner and maybe some drinks and cuddling.

“This is why you don’t promise anything, Jay.” He mumbled to himself, before he walked back toward the both of you.

“Hey, Y/N, I…”

You glanced at the look on Jay’s face and just smiled. “Gotcha.”

“Sorry.” Jay couldn’t even say anything more because everything else in his head sounded like an excuse.

“I’m not saying I’m not disappointed, because I kinda am. But I get it. And if these were bells going off for the ambulance, I’d do the same thing you’re doing now. So, go.” You paused. “But you owe me a mind-blowing date.”

Jay laughed and nodded. “That, I definitely do.”

You shot him a huge smile and headed off toward Jay’s truck to wait because you knew he’d at least take you home before heading back down to wherever he was supposed to go.

Will watched the exchange with a mix of amusement and awe before he glanced at his younger brother.

“Jay?” Will called, before Jay and him headed off in different directions.

Jay glanced up at Will and Will smiled. “You better marry that girl.”

THANK YOU FOR READING!! PLEASE TELL ME WHAT YOU THOUGHT OF THIS!!

If you want to support me, buy me a coffee!

[perilusjax]

Prompt Title: Scary accidental Harem

Ghost Prince Danny

Danny was adopted by Pariah Dark after some... convincing (Clockwork, blackmailed his former lover >:3) Unfortunately, for Danny, the ghost becomes eligible for summoning.

At first, it was just some random shenanigans, like drunk teens, sleepover rituals, the usual. Until Fenton luck strikes, and he accepts his first sacrificial summoning.

Now Danny has a harem of both scary and hot men and women. Who can now visit his personal haunt/home anytime.

Also, Danny is like over a hundred years old now.

[topguncortez]

Set Up For Failure - J. Halstead

whumptober masterlist || previous day

prompt: "I Warned You"

synopsis: Life with Jay had never been easy, and you knew that being with a police officer wasn't going to be easy. But when a newly released criminal starts repeating the same patterns that got him put behind bars, Jay starts to worry about your safety.

warnings: cursing, robbery gone wrong, attempted murder, mentions of large amounts of blood, crime scenes, pregnancy, kidnapping, mentions of a non-consensual c-section.

word count: 2.9k

Being married to a cop wasn’t easy. Being married to a detective that belonged to Hank Voight’s Intelligence department wasn’t easy either. When you first met Jay, he did everything he possibly could to shield you from the life that he lived. In fact, you didn’t even know his name was Jay until about six months into your relationship. It was by accident that you had figured out his name, who he was and what he did for work. 

At first, you were pissed, you didn’t talk to him for about two months, completely cutting him off. How could you be with someone who had lied to you so easily? Who didn’t think you were worthy or trustful enough to tell you what he did every single day? Jay had groveled, showing up at your apartment every day with a bouquet of flowers, begging for you to talk to him. You had got so annoyed that you left a note on the door telling him to take the flowers and donate them to the nursing home. But after the third month of him waiting outside your door, you finally decided to hear him out. 

“I have an explanation,” He started. You crossed your arms over your chest, “Everyone who has been close to me ends up getting hurt or worse. I couldn’t let that happen. Not to you. I have been living in this darkness for so long, and you come and. . . you brought the light back,” Jay shook his head, “I was terrified of what would happen if the light went away.” 

“No more lying,” You said, pointing at him. 

“None, I swear,” Jay said, putting his hands, “Does this mean I am forgiven?” 

“This means you are on probation.” 

Four years later, you were now Mrs. Halstead, and in your final month of pregnancy. Life with Jay had been everything you dreamed of and more. He was attentive and caring, always calling you on his way home from the station, or texting you if it was going to be a late night. He did everything he possibly could to provide for you, buying a small fixer upper house near Hank’s place. Will had accepted you as his sister-in-law almost instantly, loving to have someone on his side during petty arguments with Jay. The whole squad had basically adopted you as one of their own, even though you didn’t have a single thing to do with the police force. You had been a teacher until you got pregnant, and decided to spend the first year of your baby’s life at home. 

"There's been a series of break-ins in the Sunset Hills neighborhood, which has residents on alert. Channel 10 news is-"

The TV had clicked off from behind you, causing you to gasp and look over your shoulder at your husband. You smiled sheepishly before turning back to the pile of baby clothes that you were folding. 

“You’re home early,” You said. 

“Mhm,” Jay answered, crossing his arms over his chest, “What are you doing?” 

“Oh, you know,” You lifted up a pile of folded onesies, “Kid has more clothes than me.” Jay’s eyebrow raised, “And I was just catching up on the local happenings. . . have I told you how much I love you?”

Jay huffed, shaking his head, “I told you to quit reading into that. There’s nothing to worry about.” 

You sighed looking down at the pile of clothes, you had been caught yet again. Ever since the first break-in in the neighborhood, you had been on high alert, even though both Jay and Hank assured you that it was nothing to worry about, but you still felt uneasy every time you were in the house alone, which happened to be a lot. Hank told you that the thieves weren’t hurting anyone or going to houses where they knew people were home. The only thing they were guilty of was breaking in and stealing thousands worth in property. 

“I have the right to know what’s going on,” You crossed your arms over your chest, “I need to know what is going on in case-“ 

“Nothing is going to happen,” Jay walked over towards where you sat on the couch and kneeled down in front of you, “Nothing is going to happen to you. We have the best security system money can buy. We are blocks away from the station, uniforms are doing patrols up and down this street, hell, Hank lives right next door,” You chuckled at that. Jay’s large warm hands landed on your belly, gently rubbing over the stretched skin, “You are safe, I promise. I’m not going to let anything happen to you,” He placed a kiss on your forehead, “To both of you.” He then placed a kiss on your belly, earning him a kick in response, “Chill out in there, rambo.” 

“She gets excited when you’re around,” You smiled, “She can hear you.” 

Watching Jay become a father has been your favorite thing in life. From the moment you stood in the door of your shared bedroom, tears running down your face as you told him, you knew he was going to be the best dad ever. The next day he went out and bought as many books as he could on parenting. You had to basically force him to keep his mouth shut from telling the squad, as he wanted to shout from the rooftops he was going to be a dad. Now it was count down mode until his little girl could be in his arms. 

— — — 

“It’s going to be a late night,” Jay huffed out from the other end. You could hear the faint sound of a radio, and knew he was probably sitting in his patrol truck, Hailey next to him, waiting for some movement or clue. 

“This past week have all been late nights,” You sighed, letting the warmth of your bath water seep into your bones. In the past week, it seemed as though your baby was getting ready to make their move to come into this world. Your last appointment your doctor pointed out that your belly had started to drop a bit, which sent Jay into a full on panic. Your back had been killing you, and the only place that seemed to help ease the pain, was the clawfoot bathtub you made Jay put in the bathroom. 

“I know, baby,” Jay sighed. He hated the late nights just as much as you did, especially being so close to your due date. He knew that Natalie and Will were right down the street, and would be over in a flash if you ever needed anything, but Jay hated the fact that he couldn’t be right there. His paternity leave wasn’t set to start until after the baby was born. 

“Just tell me, you’re going to catch whatever bad guy you are after,” Although you still disliked some aspects of Jay’s job, you loved that he was part of keeping the beautiful city safe. 

“Always, baby,” Jay smiled on the other side of the receiver, “I promise I’ll be home as soon as Hank cuts us loose. Tell Rambo she can’t make her appearance tonight.” 

You rolled your eyes, “Quit calling her Rambo.” 

Jay’s smooth laugh filled the air, and you couldn’t help but smile at the sound, “I love you, Y/N. I’ll be home soon.” 

You spent probably another half hour, until the bath water had run cold and the candles burnt out before you climbed out of the bath. You grabbed a pair of Jay’s boxers and one of his Chicago PD shirts, which seemed to be all that fit you at this point, and some of the only things that felt comfortable enough to wear. You propped the pillows up behind your back as you climbed into bed. Most nights you would fall asleep in the recliner, sitting up nearly straight felt better than laying in a bed. But for some reason, you felt safer lying in your shared bed than being out in the living room. 

Sleep didn’t come easy to you. Being almost 40 weeks pregnant, moving around trying to get comfortable wasn’t something new to you. But it wasn’t the feeling of your daughter kicking your ribs that kept you awake. You couldn’t turn your mind off, every slight howl of the wind or the creek of the old house had you jumping slightly, and looking around your dark bedroom. At some point you had drifted off to a light, fitful sleep, but were awoken by the sound of smashing glass. 

You gasped, looking around the room, your hand on your pounding heart. You sat still in your bed, straining your ears to hear if maybe it was Jay. But the sound of a groan, had you climbing out of bed, going straight to the safe in the closet. You punched in the code quickly, grabbing the gun and the magazine that Jay kept in there. You had only ever loaded a gun a handful of times, and prayed that you had done it right, as you grabbed your phone, and locked the bedroom door. You dialed 9-1-1 with shaky hands as you heard footsteps and a male grumbling. 

“I’m armed and calling 9-1-1!” You yelled out, hoping to scare off whoever was in your house. The trill of the line seemed to go on forever, until you were met with the sound of a dispatcher. 

“9-1-1, what’s your emergency?” 

“I think someone broke into my house,” You said, trying your best to keep your voice steady, “I-I’m Detective Halstead’s wife.” 

“Alright Mrs. Halstead,” The operator said, “Can you tell me where you are at?” 

“I’m in my bedroom. I locked the door and hid in the closet.” 

“Are you armed?” 

You looked down at the black gun on the bedroom floor, tears filling your eyes, “Y-Yes. But please hurry, I think-” 

The sound of the bedroom door banging opened caused you to gasp. You clamped a hand over your mouth as the footsteps grew closer to you, and prayed to anyone listening that you were going to make it through this. 

— — — 

Jay felt like he was about ready to fall asleep. The unit had been tasked with trying to find out who was behind a series of break-ins. It wasn’t their normal gig, break-ins were unfortunately common in their district, but the last two break-ins resulted in two homicides. Hank was going to right off the two homicides, saying that they still didn’t catch the eye of the intelligence unit, but the last two crime scenes had similar patterns to a case that Jay had worked several years ago. 

“Have you guys settled on a name?” Hailey asked, breaking the uncomfortable silence. 

Jay shook his head with a smile, “She’s still set on Ophelia. But I think Sammy is better.” 

“Sammy?” Hailey asked, already guessing what Jay’s answer was going to be. 

“For Sammy Sosa!” 

Hailey shook her head, “Yeah, I agree with Y/N on this one.” Jay scoffed, and the silence stretched back across the cab of the truck, “Why do you think this is a revenge thing?” 

“I don’t know if it is a revenge thing, but I have a feeling it is,” Jay sighed, “The pattern just fits. 13 plain home invasions, then two homicides. The writings in blood on the walls of the crime scene? That wasn’t public knowledge.” 

“But why would Roger Sterling wait this long? What has it been, six years?” 

Jay nodded his head. It was one of his first cases in the intelligence units, and Hank was right when he said the first one sticks with you. Jay thought he had the facts right out in front of him. Roger Sterling checked all of the boxes for the home invader turned murderer, except one. The night of the third homicide, Roger had a solid alibi that was backed by his wife. But not having an alibi for two out of three murders was good enough for the jury to convict, and sent Roger to prison for two years. That was, until the conviction was overturned on the grounds of ‘not enough solid evidence’. Roger was let go, but he held a vengeance for Jay. 

“I don’t know,” Jay ran a hand down his face, “I’m guessing he was probably stewing in his anger. He was proven innocent of all the crimes, but that still doesn’t give him a clean bill. He’s probably been angry for years and is now acting out.” 

“It just doesn’t make-” 

“All Units, All Units, we have an active call for a home invasion and the sound of gun fire.” 

Jay cursed, grabbing his radio, “This is 5021 George, what’s the address we’re in route.” 

“Address is three-twelve south Cleveland street.” 

Jay felt like his heart had stopped in his chest, as his radio fell from his hand. The only sound in his ears was the sound of his blood, roaring in his body. Everything had frozen, his hands began to shake and his vision went black. He couldn’t even hear or feel Hailey shaking him out of his trance, trying to get his attention. It was like Jay’s body moved on autopilot, as he pulled the truck out of park and sped towards his house. 

His house. 

The house his wife and child were home alone in. 

The house where there were gunshots fired. 

Jay barely put the truck in park as he arrived on scene, and didn’t even bother to shut the door as he jumped out and ran up the yellow police tape. The bright lights and sounds of sirens were making his head pound as he tried to push his way through to his house. He was brought out of his trance when he felt a hand on his chest, stopping him from approaching. Jay looked down, anger coursing through his bones. 

“Let me fucking go,” He sneered at Hank. 

“I can’t let you do that,” Hank’s gravelly voice sounded out. 

“That’s my wife!” 

“And this is a crime scene,” Hank barked back, “My crime scene.” Jay felt like he was going to throw up, as his knees gave out. Hank quickly wrapped an arm around him, helping him down to the curb. 

“Is she-” 

“She’s alive,” Hank responded, “But barely. They took her straight to Med, I called ahead and told Will to meet her there.” 

Jay felt like he could breathe a little bit better, knowing that his baby brother was going to be in charge of his wife’s care. It was as if Jay’s mind went blank, a factory reset as he looked at the members of his unit jump right into working the scene. 

“I need to see it,” Jay said, his voice lacking any emotion. Hailey, who stood behind him, gave Hank a look, but the older man knew Jay well enough. 

“C’mon,” Hank turned and walked towards the house, Jay hot on his heels. The two of them pushed through the yellow police tape, and Jay felt his heart tick again. 

The perfect house that Y/N had spent so much time on, was destroyed. Pieces of glass from the windows littered the floor, pictures on the wall had been skewed, bloody footprints left on the hardwood floors that took Jay way too long to fix up. 

Jay clenched his jaw, “Where was she?” 

“Perp came in through the back,” Adam explained, pointing to the open back door, “Looted around down here for a little bit, from what we can tell, nothing was taken.” Jay couldn’t even focus on seeing if anything was missing, he was more concerned on how Y/N ended up the victim. “Then he went upstairs,” Adam nodded his head towards the bloody footprints. 

Hank then led him up the stairs, where more uniforms stood around taking pictures, and putting numbered yellow place cards on the blood splatters. Normally, the coppery scent of blood didn’t bother Jay, but this had him feeling sick as he approached his bedroom. 

“The 9-1-1 call was dialed from in here,” Hank said, “Her phone was found in the closet along with a nine mil.” Jay felt some sense of pride that Y/N knew to get the gun from the safe. He could remember the day he had first brought it home and how much she had protested having a weapon in the house. But Jay promised it would be the only weapon they had and it was going to be under lock and key at all times. 

“Did she fire it?” Jay asked, his voice barely above a whisper. 

Hank nodded, “Bullet embedded in the wall.” 

“She missed,” Jay shook his head, his blue eyes looking down at the huge blood spot on the bedroom floor. “Is th-that her. . .” Hank nodded his head again. Jay let out a shuddering breath as he sat on the edge of the bed. It was as if time had finally stopped, and Jay came to a sickening realization about the blood on the floor, “The baby. . .” His eyes widened as he looked at Hank, who had a grime expression on his face, “Where is my baby?” 

Hank looked at Adam, who stood in the doorway, “We have an amber alert-” 

Jay stood up from the bed immediately, but Hank put a hand on his chest, “Get your fucking hand off of me.” 

“We found this next to her,” Hank handed Jay a note. 

Jay took the yellow piece of notebook paper, which was folded in half and a polaroid picture was in the middle. The picture was of Y/N, and it looked to be taken not that long ago, her round pregnant belly protruding out as she stood in front of the large bay window of the living room. Written in what Jay prayed was red ink were the words: 

“I warned you.”

[poppadom0912]

The best babysitters

Warnings: Mentions of absent father but all fluff

Summary: Work prevents you from going home one night, thankfully you’ve got the best backup in Chicago.

A/N: This is being posted later than I planned. My mum was in hospital and it gave me a scare but she's all recovered now so here this is. This is in celebration of 1k, a few more will follow as my workload has decreased significantly.

This fic exists in the same world as my other fic ‘older sister’ but can also be read as a stand alone.

You were tired.

Work was beyond busy today and your clients were being unnecessarily stressful. All you wanted now was to go home, relieve your babysitter of her duties and enjoy the night in with your daughter.

It seemed that the universe had some sort of vendetta against you though because just as you were putting the finishing signatures on the last few papers, an intern, a woman you saw earlier at reception, came running into your office slightly out of breath.

You wanted to scream.

Letting the poor intern talk, you smiled at her stiffly, dismissing her after saying you’d make your way. There was no way you could ask your babysitter to stay late for God knows how much longer, you could remember her telling you she has a lecture tomorrow morning.

Getting up from your desk, you sighed, screwing your eyes closed when you caught the time on your phone. Your sigh in defeat could probably be heard all across Chicago.

Walking out your office, the sound of your heels filled out the empty space, majority of the firm had gone home, only a few stragglers staying behind to close up on any loose ends.

Turning your phone on, you ignored the several notifications screaming for your attention and went straight to your contacts.

Your phone only rang twice before the person on the receiving end picked up.

“Hey Will, can you do me the biggest favour please… You’re a life saviour, thanks, I owe you one.”

Hanging up the phone, you stared ahead through the windows at the bustling waiting room, raised angry voices overlapping and bleeding though the walls.

You could already feel your headache intensifying.

*****

Using his spare key, Will entered your house. Shuffling inside, he took off his jacket and shoes as usual.

Hearing the front door open, little pattering feet were immediately heard running across the house. Will smiled at the sound that he didn’t hear often due to all of your demanding jobs.

“Mama! Mama oh-“

The immense joy on Harper’s face disappeared as the nearly two-year-old rounded the corner on her little chubby legs, expecting to see her beloved mother who she missed all day only to suddenly be met with her redheaded uncle.

“Well hello to you too miss Harper.” Will smiled down at his niece nonetheless, crouching down to scoop her into his arms to which she didn’t argue and instead welcomed.

As soon as she was safe in his arms, the toothiest, giddiest smile broke out on her chubby face that was so scarily identical to yours that it could only be explained by witchcraft.

Harper giggled, such a sound making Will forget about all the horrors that stained his day from the emergency department.

“Hi!” She exclaimed, her smile remained upright and never faltered. “Hi!”

And soon after, she pressed her open mouth onto his stubbly cheek, her attempt of a kiss. Despite struggling with the tough task and all the slobber that remained on his cheek, Will’s reaction was instant and wouldn’t change for the world.

“Oh, thank you so much Harper! Uncle Will missed you tons. Look at how big you’ve grown!”

But, before Will could have all his focus solely on his adorable niece, the sound of the front door unlocking diverted his attention.

Lo and behold, Jay casually strolled in as though this was another random Tuesday.

Oh, that son of a b-

Harper’s scream that followed definitely burst Will’s eardrums.

Will winced, tipping his head away to protect his ears from any further damage before turning to glare at his brother who was taking his jacket off.

"What are you-"

"You said we'd meet at Molly's for a drink but you weren't there." Jay cut Will off, a smile on his face as he looked at Harper and spoke without looking in Will's direction. "Natalie told me you were here."

"Jay Jay's jealous Harper." Will said, his tone all factual and matter-of-fact as he looked at the toddler in his arms. "He didn't want to miss out."

Jay didn't even try to look offended or hurt by Will's remark because deep down, it was somewhat true because how could Jay let Will have all the fun by himself?

"Stop hogging her you buffoon and let me hold her." Jay told Will, not waiting for a reply as he moved forward and took Harper into his arms, the girl didn't protest nor did she willingly lean forward.

"What- Uh, I've literally been here for five minutes Jay."

"Am I your favourite uncle? I knew it!"

*****

Following Jay’s sudden and unprompted arrival, Will dismissed your babysitter, paying her what you usually did and a little more as compensation for staying so late.

Once she had left, there wasn’t much left around the house for them to do besides turning the dishwasher on and making Harper’s nightly milks, but it wasn’t her bedtime just yet and maybe if time permitted it, Harper could stay up a little beyond her usual bedtime.

Consider it a small treat for this special circumstance without her mother implementing her strict nighttime routine.

While Will was sorting away the finals bits in the kitchen, Jay easily made himself comfortable in the living room while Harper continued to babble nonsensically, a few discernible words welcomed themselves into the mix. Jay allowed himself to take a second to relish in the moment, trying to prevent himself from having an existential crisis as he realised he was both emotional but also proud of how much she was growing.

“Dada, look look! S’ Dada!”

Moment ruined, Jay’s smile instantly fell.

Jay followed the direction of Harper’s index finger to the tv, his face hardening at the sight of the man who failed his fiancée and his baby who just turned one.

Harper's 'dad' was a television reporter and it had totally slipped his mind that this was the channel he worked for. Seeing his stupid face yap away about the news made his blood boil.

Jay changed the channel without a second thought.

Your ex fiancé had suddenly decided to leave on Harper’s first birthday, not even having the decency to at least show up at her birthday party.

A year later, and Harper still remembered the man whose name was her first word.

It devastated you still to this day what he had done and Harper’s random interjections of ‘dada’ only made the wound deeper.

“Dada isn’t here harper.” Jay said, tone as soft as it could be as he tried to explain it without her crying.

“It’s just uncle Jay and Will, and mama will be home soon.” Jay continued, holding the toddler in his lap so there was no chance of her running away crying.

Luckily, Harper was a mummy’s girl through and through, so despite the large absence of her father, simply mentioning ��mama’ or anything akin to that made her entire face light up in a way that no one else could.

“Okay Halstead’s, listen up!” Will said as he entered the living room, phone in one and a towel in the other.

“Y/N’s saying it’s mostly likely going to be another two hours minimum so we’re most likely going to have to stay over.” Will told Jay specifically before looking down at Harper.

“You wanna get into your PJ’s Harps? Jay Jay can make you some milk.”

And despite her highly energised state, Harper would never turn down the enticing combination of her pyjamas and warm milk.

Crawling out of Jay’s lap, Harper moved towards Will who in turn of carrying her gave Jay the towel he was holding. And as much as Jay wanted to fight his brother, he knew Will had more experience with kids - i.e. Owen - and so he could gladly change her diaper.

With Will and Harper standing over him, brown eyes wide, glinting with a hidden intent Jay had become familiar with since childhood. It really wasn’t fair that you and Will both had your father’s eyes which Harper just had to inherit. Jay found himself useless and always surrendering to those goddamn eyes, even as the youngest sibling.

Whenever Jay remembered his childhood, it never made sense why the two older siblings never folded as easily when he looked up at them with the biggest, most imploring eyes. Even now, three decades later, and not a single thing had changed.

“Okay, okay! Just stop looking at me like that.” As soon as Jay spoke, the two rejoiced, their happiness still discernible even as they made their way upstairs.

“Let’s get this party started then.”

*****

And so party they did.

Well at least according to Harper’s standards.

The night started off with warm drinks - Harper with her milk while Will and Jay spoiled themselves to the expensive coffee beans that you easily could afford but neither your brothers indulged in unless under your roof.

Following this, Harper had a short but very fun time running around with sudden newfound energy, causing as much havoc as humanly possible for anyone her size.

It was safe to say that she tired herself quite quickly.

As Jay opened himself and Will a beer, he walked back into the living room, his eyes landing on his older brother and niece, the younger scrunched up into a little ball on Will's chest. Her face completely relaxed and arms wrapped around his torso as she snored quietly.

"Now this, after today, is my kinda party."

"Amen." Will agreed, tapping his bottle with Jay's as a silent 'cheers'.

Jay settled besides his brother, both of them staring forward at the muted movie Harper randomly chose, the first she watched that didn't have any princess affiliations.

"Gosh, it feels like years since we last babysat her." Will said, a sombre but nostalgic tone lacing his words.

"It does." Jay hummed as he swallowed his beer. "We're all so busy with work we can hardly make time for each other."

Will scoffed. "I see you almost everyday, strolling casually into the ED like you own the freaking place. Who are you kidding?"

Jay rolled his eyes but agreed nonetheless.

"Yeah, we need to visit more often. Make more effort and take out the time."

The silence that followed was filled by Harpers little snores and the occasional sound of a siren blaring past in the distance.

"I'm so tired I could knock out right here on the floor."

"Don't be such a doofus, go put her down in her bed."

"Aye aye captain."

*****

When you finally returned home three hours later, tired beyond belief. You were so close to dropping to the floor as soon as you locked the door but as you ventured into the house, you were met with the most heart warming sight.

On the floor in the living room remained your two younger brothers and your daughter. Harper was still scrunched up in a ball on Will's chest, her hand clutching his shirt while said man had his face leaning forward into her hair, his breaths causing Harper's curl to move occasionally. Jay sat besides them, hands crossed slightly on his lap and his head tipped backwards, resting on the sofa.

Even as your eyes burned with the need for sleep, you took a few pictures of the scene before you, your smile not going till your head met your pillow.

If Jay and Will woke up with sore necks in the morning, there was a very seasoned doctor in the house for a reason.

[halsteadlover]

𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐘𝐨𝐮

• Pairing: Jay Halstead x Fem!Reader.

• Requested by @hart-kinsella: Maybe him and mc are working undercover (but they're married in real life) and a guy tries too hard with her (takes her by the arm and invades her personal space as well as trying to flirt with her with words) and then Jay tells him that and punches him. They could be at a club like that one episode when he and Hailey (and Kevin, maybe? I don't remember exactly) were undercover - unfortunately I don't recall which season it was.

• Warnings: mention of drugs, violence.

• Word count: 1543.

• A/N: I know this is not my best work and I apologize 😭 but I managed to quickly write it so I can post something ❤️ and tell me why I stayed for half an hour staring at the wall to think about a title and I ended up with this one 😭 btw love you all and thank you always for your support

It was no secret Jay sometimes hated undercover missions. Especially if you were involved.

He couldn’t help it. He knew you were an amazing cop, one of the best he ever worked with, capable of defending yourself in any circumstances but since you were also his wife, he couldn’t help but worry about you.

And this case was no different.

You and Jay were undercover due to a drug trafficking case, him as a potential buyer interested in purchasing the drugs, you as his work partner who had set up the connection with Joshua Ryder, the criminal suspected of being the gang’s leader.

Jay was on the verge of losing his mind, not being able to stay still and acting like nothing was happening.

You were both in a club, sitting in a VIP room while you talked with Ryder and convince him to make a deal with you. The rest of the team were instead in some fake company’s vans listening to your conversations in real time.

However, things started to go wrong when Jay noticed one of the traffickers approaching you in a way he didn’t like at all.

“Are you here to do business or watch her like a hawk?” the gang leader had insisted for the umpteenth time while for the umpteenth time Jay directed his gaze towards you who continued to giggle with fake enthusiasm with one of Ryder’s henchmen.

You were uncomfortable, as with any mission that involved getting close to another man other than your husband. You knew it was your job, that you had a duty to fulfill and your private life had to stay out of it but sometimes it wasn’t that easy.

“You sure you don’t want anything to drink, sugar?” Asked the man who insistently continued to hit on you. You didn’t even know his name – or care to know – but you smiled anyway with fake naivety, slightly shaking your head.

You quickly glanced at Jay who was sitting in front of you, noticing he was busy talking to Ryder, but his gaze met yours for a moment. It was brief but in that simple look you understood he too had noticed that guy’s insistence. Jay had his arms crossed over his chest, breathing heavy, his jaw clenched as he saw how this man insisted on getting closer to you.

He was disgusting, he smelled of alcohol from miles away, and you had to repress the urge to vomit and the instinct to punch his ugly face.

The man approached further, sliding on the sofa towards you and you moved back, trying to create further distance but without making it obvious and making him suspicious.

“You know, my boss is quite jealous of his employees, you shouldn’t be so close to me,” you falsely giggled but he didn’t seem to get the hint, in fact, it seemed to amuse him even more.

“We’re all one big family here darling, what’s mine is someone else’s and what’s someone else’s is mine…” He rested an arm on the back of the sofa behind your shoulders and although he hadn’t even touched you, you felt your skin crawl and the urgent need to throw yourself into an acid bath. “If you want to do business with us your boss will have to learn how to share… Especially with such a beautiful and gracious girl like you.”

The desire to kick him in the balls was intense and you wondered what kind of woman would really fall for these words.

Jay was on the verge of losing his mind.

He was trying.

He was really trying but it was so fucking hard to stay still and not react when that son of a bitch was being a creep with his wife. Ryder was talking to him about something he didn’t even care about, but he couldn’t pay attention and process a single word, too focused on you.

He couldn’t help but glance at you every now and then, running a hand on his jaw in frustration and starting to fidget on the spot as he saw the man getting closer and closer to you and invading your personal space, like touching your hair or caress your shoulder.

It wasn’t jealousy, he could never be jealous of a filthy man like him but he deeply hated not being able to do anything to keep you safe without ruining the whole mission. He hated seeing you so tense and uncomfortable although from the way your hands were balled into fists in your lap, he knew you too were itching to punch him.

He hated having to pretend you were simply his work partner and not his wife.

But he swore he saw red when that man’s clammy hand rested on your face and your eyes widened at the contact as your entire body froze in place.

Fuck the mission and these motherfuckers too.

Jay lost control.

That slimy hand on you had driven him crazy and before he knew it, he had stood up and grabbed the man’s hand with his, punching him in the face with all the strength in his body. He didn’t catch the gasp that escaped you and he didn’t even care he had just ruined any chance of doing ‘business’ with Ryder along with the possibility of framing him. While his fist hit that bastard again and again, all he could do was think of those hands on you.

“That’s my fucking wife you motherfucker!” Jay screamed in his face, holding him by the collar of his shirt as the man spat out blood, struggling to keep up with the fury of the undercover detective. “Let me catch you again putting a hand on her or even just looking her way, I’ll enjoy breaking your fingers one by one before throwing you in jail.”

Everything was now chaos.

The team, who in the meantime had witnessed everything through your hidden cameras, burst in when they realized the situation had now worsened to the point of no return. You tried to pull Jay away from the man, but it was totally useless, not when he was so furious that your strength was no match for his.

Ryder was fuming when he realized you were cops and you had tried to frame him, swearing he’d make you pay dearly while Kevin handcuffed him along with the rest of his goons.

“Baby,” you called back but Jay didn’t look at you right away. You stood outside the club under Voight’s orders, a hand on his bicep and caressing him as you tried to get his attention. You were alone in a little corner, waiting for your boss for his inevitable fury.

“You okay?” He asked, his voice low but finally focusing his gaze on you.

You let out a laugh trying to diffuse the tension, you hated seeing him so furious. “You are ask me if I’m okay? I’m not the one who just punched a guy.”

He sighed, tearing his eyes away from you as he ran his hands over his face with frustration. Your heart clenched at the sight of his red and bruised knuckles. “I wish I had killed him to be honest.”

“Jay I don’t want you to get hurt because of me,” you replied, taking his hands in yours and leaving a kiss on the back of them, smiling when you saw his hard features start to soften at the gesture. “I could’ve handled him, I wouldn’t have let him go any further.”

“I know you could baby, you’re amazing,” he softy spoke, tucking a strand of your hair behind your ear. He took a step towards you, closing the distance enough you had to slightly lift your head up to look into his eyes. “But there’s no way on earth that I would have sat there and watched while that son of a bitch put his hands on you.”

He cupped your face with his hands, his thumbs caressing your heated cheeks. “No one gets to put a hand on you, much less against your will. You’re my wife, I’m the only bastard who can touch you and I will gladly kill anyone who dares to do it instead of me, am I clear?”

You let out a breath, almost on the verge of passing out right there and now in his arms. “God baby I want to suck your dick so bad right now. I love when you get so protective of me, it’s so hot.”

Jay burst out laughing, his stomach clenching in anticipation knowing you would stand by your words. He pulled you into a hug and you rested your head on his chest as you wrapped your arms around him. “I’ll always keep you safe, I won’t let anyone touch a single hair of your head, I hope you know it. God knows I would set the city on fire to protect you.”

“I know baby, I love you so damn much it’s insane,” you deeply inhaled the smell of his cologne, leaving a kiss on his shirt coated chest. “But I hope it’s worth it because Voight is coming and I think he’s ready to take us both out,” you continued when you broke away from the hug and saw your boss coming up behind Jay, a furious look on his face.

“Oh yeah, it’ll always be worth it, especially for the amazing blowjob you’ll give me later.”

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[bellarkeselection]

Halstead’s Favorite Duo

Anonymous request - Can you do a Jay Halstead x reader, where they are married and she is part of the K-9 unit? Maybe they called her in or something to help chase down a suspect.

My boots hit the ground as fast as I could to keep up with my first best friend for I wish I could say my whole life. Yet I have only known this dog since I joined the K-9 unit that works with the Chicago Police Department. My German shepherd dog ran forward on the heels of the man that was running from us. The man we were after was a drug cartel that they had been hunting for months. “Ryder! Attack.” I commanded him before he launched himself through the glass store window.

The guy we were chasing tried to run to the back of the store but he tripped over a shopping cart giving Ryder the opportunity to tackle him to the ground. Stepping over the broken window glass I draw my gun from my belt pointing it at the guy. “Y/n, Ryder! Are you guys okay?”

“We’re fine, Jay. Ryder ain’t too bad at his job. Ryder, come here.” I smiled seeing my husband coming around the corner lowering his gun when he saw the situation.

Ryder snarled at the guy on the ground keeping his tail still when we were out in the field. Otherwise he would let it actually wag when he was happy. Jay bent down on a knee after putting his gun away, grabbing the guy off the floor and handcuffing him. “You’re under arrest for smuggling drugs across the border. Take him back to the station.” He handed him off to one of the other local officers.

“You did good, boy.” Dropping down on a knee in front of my dog he started moving his tail wagging it since it was just me and Jay alone with him. “So how much paperwork does this leave you with tonight. I can order take out if you want if you’ll be home later.”

He shakes his head walking back to one of the squad cars having me and Ryder following his heels like we did every morning when we all had to leave the apartment. “Hailey said she would take care of it. I actually had something else in mind.”

“Oh really. Care to share what you had in mind?” I smirked knowing that he wouldn’t give it up even if I asked the question but I did it anyway.

Jay sent me a glare. “It didn’t work on our first date and it still won’t work now.” I nudged him and he chuckled before Ryder barked signaling that he wanted into our conversation.

“That means he doesn’t want to be left out of whatever mystery thing you have planned. And you agreed to take me in every way that includes my doggy.” I responded to him.

Jay and I had gotten married a few years ago. I had just been promoted to chief of my unit. Vioet was the man to help me get it after he had seen my history with Ryder and the amount of cases we helped crack down compared to the other k-9 unit members. Jay opened the door letting my dog jump into the backseat shutting the door once he was in. We both got in the car and removed our bullet proof vests and he started the drive looking my way a few times. “Do you remember the day we met?”

“Of course I do. I got injured on an assignment and the doctors at the hospital your brother Will works at wouldn’t let Ryder inside my room. So he started losing it and breaking things. If it wasn’t for you I was sure Ryder would have bit Will’s leg.” I snorted running a hand down my face thinking back on that night.

Jay smiled, shaking his head. “Yeah but he and I have the same goal to protect you…and love you.”

“So where are we going exactly? I mean it’s kind of strange that you are asking about the day we met. We’re already married. What else could we possibly do?” I shifted in my seat bouncing up and down with the tension of waiting.

Jay didn’t stop the car for another few minutes, parking the car outside of a house that was painted a light blue on the outside and it had a gray roof. He let Ryder out of the backseat first before coming over to my side and helping me out. “The surprise is that this place is now ours.”

“Are you serious, Jay!” I gasped covering my mouth with my hands spinning around to face him since he was standing behind me.

He slipped the keys in my hands. “It’s our. I am not lying to you. I got it all set up a few weeks ago. That way we aren’t cramped in an apartment and this gives Ryder a space to run when he wants to.”

“I love you.” I smiled, wrapping my arms around his neck and kissing him slowly.

Ryder barks running towards the front door just as Jay wraps his arms around my waist tugging me closer to deepen the kiss until he breaks it not being able to hold in his chuckle. “I love you too…and Ryder seems to approve.”

Comments really appreciated ❤️

[valeovalairs]

I am so behind on jrwitober, but absolutely needed to do art for a fic you read, so here’s jrwitober day 11 (three days late) art for a fic you liked

fic is Bleeding Ink by @dakota-cole, literally obsessed with this omg I love demonkicks so much

Additionally

[megamindsecretlair]

Fall Into You

Pairing: Kevin Atwater x Black!Fem!/ Plus Size reader

Warnings: 18+, Minors DNI, You are in charge of your own reading experience. Intentional use of AAVE. SMUT. PWP, cursing, PIV, oral (female and male receiving) teasing/mocking, cum play, size kink, dirty talk, praise kink, all consensual. Slight power imbalance, Kevin is a landlord and reader is the tenant. No sexual favors being exchanged.

Summary: Hoping to beat the storm, Kevin comes over to fix your sink. However, the power goes out and you get to know your new landlord a little better.

Word Count: 7,402k

AO3 Link

A/N: Hello, my loves. This has been on my brain for a while and a special gift for @babybratzmaraj. I guess I should stop apologizing for writing so much, the story gon' need what it needs. ONE SHOT. Please, please consider commenting and reblogging to help support writers! And please put ages in bios! Or get blockt!

Taglist: @planetblaque @browngirldominion @we-outsiiiide @iv0rysoap @thecookiebratz

The doorbell tore you from your thoughts as you looked out of your window. The TV stated that the storm was only getting started. Only getting started…

You inwardly groaned and fixed your glasses, heading to your door and checking the peephole. Kevin Atwater stood on the other side and your heart fluttered just seeing him. You stepped back, took a deep breath, and opened the door.

“Kevin! Thank you! You didn’t have to come today. This storm looks nasty,” you said. 

Kevin smiled and shook his head. He wore a black puffer jacket zipped up and carried a small toolbox. “No problem, I promise. Chicago’s seen worse and you need a working sink,” he said. 

You stepped back and let him inside, hoping that your glasses didn’t fog up from the sheer sexiness that entered your apartment. 

“Huh, you decorated since last time,” he said.

You looked around at the cozy space. The walls were standard, plain cream, but you made sure to dress it up with paintings in soothing blue and ocean pieces that reminded you of your hometown. The boxes had been cleared away since the last time Kevin was over to fix your bedroom door.

“Yeah, had to make it look like I actually live here,” you said with a giggle. 

Kevin laughed with you. He placed the toolbox on your small, round kitchen table and took off his jacket. You busied yourself with tidying up your clean apartment. You picked up the bowl of fruit just to…put it right back down on the sink. 

You had to look anywhere but at the deep burgundy button up he wore. Or the peek of a black tank underneath. His bulging arms or the way his hips sloped just so. You had to look away so that he wouldn’t see the neon “horny” sign on your forehead.

You could not crush on your landlord. It was several kinds of wrong. But how could you not? He was so tall, charming, funny, and sweet. His juicy pink lips have been the star of multiple fantasies lately. 

“...help you with that,” Kevin was saying.

“Huh? Sorry…” you said and gave him a sheepish smile. Your mind tended to go on little vacations. Especially where Kevin Atwater was concerned. 

He smiled at you and began rolling up the sleeves of his shirt. “I said what did you do with the boxes? I told you I could help you with that,” he said.

You waved him off and dropped down into a nearby kitchen chair. “You already do so much for me, Kevin. I really should be paying you,” you said. 

“Rent’s just fine with me. I told you to call me for whatever you need,” he said. His eyes lingered on you a second too long before he licked his lips and started rummaging around in his toolbox. 

You were incapable of thinking anything but dirty thoughts when he spoke. Whether he meant it that way or not. He brought the toolbox closer to your sink. He flipped the faucet and the pipes groaned. A loud, groaning sound as if there were ghosts dancing in the pipes. 

He flipped it back off and gave you a look. “You ain’t tell me it was making that kind of a noise,” he said.

“I told you it was a noise,” you said. You shrugged your shoulders and he chuckled, licking his lips as he went back to looking at the sink. 

“I was thinking it was a small noise. Like something just needed some WD-40,” he said. “That…sound bad, right?” He asked.

“You’re asking me?” You shook your head dramatically. “If I knew anything about fixing sinks, I wouldn’t have asked you here during a storm.” You still felt guilty about that. You told Kevin that you could wait until it passed, that running water wasn’t that important in the grand scheme of things. You had bottles of water and the bathroom sink worked just fine to wash your hands. 

As your mind wandered, you weren’t paying attention to Kevin getting closer. You didn’t notice as he stood in front of you and dropped down to a squat to look you in the eye. You shrieked when you finally saw him as he seemed to have teleported from the sink. 

“There is no way in hell I’ma let my favorite tenant live here with no running water. So no more need to apologize, right?” 

His raspy voice made you lose all coherent thought. You twiddled your fingers since he was too close and you gave him a light, nervous giggle. “Stop. I’m not your favorite tenant. I’ve seen the way Mrs. Brennan looks at you. Like you hang the moon,” you said.

Kevin chuckled and stood up, going back to the sink with the toolbox in his hand. He hummed. “I helped her out with something and now she keeps trying to set me up with her granddaughter,” he said. 

“Oh? Does Kevin Atwater have trouble meeting women?” You teased. 

He laughed as he opened the cabinet underneath. You hadn’t had a chance to get to the store for proper cleaning supplies. So far, all you had was bleach and Pinesol, a small bucket, and a pack of sponges. It was on your long, long, long list of things you needed in order to feel settled in this place. 

The wind roared outside and it shook the windows. It howled. The heater was on but did little to combat the chill in the air. You would never feel settled here. The winters were a different breed. Designed to freeze you to the toes and wrack your body with uncontrollable shivers. 

“I meet plenty of women. But timing and circumstances are never there,” Kevin said. He settled onto his back and turned off the water to the sink. He began working, leaning forward to grab a tool and then use it under the sink. 

His shirt rode up revealing a soft middle that you wanted to sink your teeth into. He was solid and stocky, built for sturdiness. 

“What do you mean by timing and circumstance?” You asked.

“Well, I did have a thing with someone but wasn’t exactly healthy. She didn’t like that I’m a cop,” he said. 

“Hate to break it to you, but you’ll find that a lot of people won’t like that you’re a cop,” you said. For you, it was always, “fuck cops”. After meeting Kevin, now it was, “want to fuck that cop in particular”. 

You looked useless sitting there at the kitchen table, but what else were you supposed to do? You still had some unpacking to do but you didn’t feel right leaving him alone. The place didn’t feel like yours yet. Your manners prevented you from leaving him to it as if he were some servant only here to do a job. 

“That’s fair. But can’t stop me from trying,” he said.

“That’s the spirit. Are you a romantic?” You asked. You heard the words after you spoke them and shook your head, not that he could see. “Sorry, that’s rude. You don’t have to answer that.” You pushed your glasses back up your nose and blew out a quiet sigh. 

“Nah, it’s cool. I guess, yeah, I would say I’m a romantic. Just waiting for the right girl. How ‘bout you come help me? Hand me that wrench,” he said. He pointed to something in his toolbox.

You stood up and got closer to him, getting down to your knees and sitting back on your legs. You picked up the nearest wrench and handed it to his outstretched hand. You shared a look with him as he took it from you and began loosening a bolt on the pipe. 

“You? You into the whole thing about romance?” He asked.

“Uh, yeah. I believe it exists. How anyone can find love here when you’re freezing your ass off is beyond me,” you said.

“It’s all about layers. Undershirt, thermal, overshirt, sweater, hoodie, jacket. You’ll be warm enough,” he said.

You giggled. “Warm enough? I’d be sweating worse than…” You successfully caught yourself before mentioning sex. You bit the corners of your mouth to prevent you from giggling about that. Something about Kevin Atwater turned you into a giggling mess like some kid with a crush. 

“Worse than what?” Kevin asked. 

You glanced at him. His pink tongue poked out between his lips as he worked on the bolt. The screeching from the metal grated a bit and you winced. 

“Worse than a sauna,” you finished lamely. He flicked a glance at you as if he knew that wasn’t what you were going to say originally. He left it alone as he hummed and returned to the bolt. 

“You get used to it,” he said.

“This type of cold? No thanks,” you said.

Kevin chuckled. He sat up from the sink and fixed his shirt, lowering it over the glimpse of his stomach. He looked at you and smiled. “There’s more to Chicago than just the winter time. We have the best pizza. Everybody friendly, they just loud about it. Tell you what, why don’t you finally take me up on my offer to take you to Molly’s? It’s run by a couple of friends. They’re nice people, we’d all protect you, and you’d be able to get out and enjoy some things around here,” he said. 

“A bar full of cops, doctors, and firemen? I’d feel so intimidated,” you said. You shook your head and giggled. 

“Don’t. You need to get out,” he said.

“Pot, meet kettle. How many times have you been out this week?” 

“Fair. But if you go out, I will too,” he said. 

You held his stare and bit the corners of your mouth again. “I have so much to do here already,” you said. You didn’t like that you kept turning him down but the thought of meeting that many people at once? You wouldn’t survive it. 

You knew Kevin would be nice and show you around but being at the center of attention was unbearable. 

“One day I’ll get you to say yes. If you’re gonna be here, you may as well make some friends. I think you’d get along with Stella. You remind me of her,” he said. 

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, tough, no nonsense, funny, sweet,” he said. 

“Please,” you said and giggled. Was this Stella single? Did they have something going? 

Kevin opened his mouth to say something else when the wind howled louder, tearing your gaze to the window. The window shook and the lights began to flicker before they spasmed out. You shrieked as you were shrouded in darkness. 

The pale, white glow of the outside gave your apartment a blue and gray tint. Like waking up in the morning and the sun was still hiding behind clouds. You stood up and went to the window but you weren’t sure what you were looking for. Only that the snow and hail seemed to fall harder, peppering the ground. 

“Shoot,” you said. 

Kevin stood up and moved behind you, placing one hand on your hip while he leaned behind you to look outside as well. His warm hand scorched your skin as he looked one way and then another. 

“Let me see if it’s just us. Lock this door behind me,” he said.

You’d never seen this side of him yet. The kind that took charge. A new authority entered his voice, one that did not entertain disobedience. He turned and walked out and you followed behind to close and lock the door. 

You paced your kitchen as you waited. You didn’t know why. Lights went out all the time. He was perfectly safe going to the basement to check the circuit breaker. Minutes passed while you piddled around, cleaning up runaway socks on the floor around the hamper. 

Still had things to unload in the bathroom, but without light, you couldn’t see what you were pulling out of the box. It was too awkward holding your phone’s flashlight and the items. 

A knock on your door made you jump but then you checked the peephole. Kevin stood there with his hands in his pockets, glancing around. You opened the door and let him back inside. 

“Power’s out on the whole block. I already put in a call with utilities. With this kind of storm, there’s no telling when they’ll get out,” he said.

You sighed. “Oh, Kevin, I’m so sorry!” You said. You should have pushed him harder to stay home. To fix it another day. 

“Hey, what did we say about apologizing?” He asked.

“Sorry! I just feel so bad. Oh! I said it again, sorry,” you said. You slapped a hand over your mouth as you couldn’t stop apologizing for trapping him here. Now what were you going to do? He couldn’t fix your sink in the dark and there was no power to cook so you couldn’t offer him a meal. 

Kevin crossed towards you, invading your personal space. “No more apologizing. It’s okay,” he said.

“Well, I was going to save these until after. Since you’re stuck with me, we have cookies to hold us over,” you said. 

“If I had to be stuck anywhere, I’m glad it’s with you,” he said. 

You smiled and tugged on the sleeves of your purple shirt. Now that the power was out, that meant your heater was too. “Shit,” you said, realizing.

You told Kevin and he nodded. “Have you unpacked something to drink? I’ll show you how us Chicagoans stay warm,” he said. 

“That’s the first thing I unpacked,” you said. You left his overwhelming presence and went to your kitchen. The plate of cookies were wrapped on the short sink so that he wouldn’t have seen it. You wanted to surprise him with gratitude for all the hard work he did around your place.

You opened a cabinet and grabbed two glasses. They clinked together as you placed them on the sink and went to a small pantry, taking out a bottle of whiskey. Kevin joined you in the kitchen to help and he whistled at the bottle. “Basil Hayden?” He asked.

“Did you expect something girly?” You asked. 

“No ma’am, just didn’t take you for a whiskey type,” he said. He grinned and joined you at the table. 

“Now, we don’t want to get wasted but the goal is to keep a steady drink going to stay warm. So how ‘bout some questions to get to know each other? Since we got all this time,” he said. 

“Is this an interrogation?” You asked with a giggle. 

“Naw, just two friends getting to know each other. So we either answer truthfully or take shots. Up for it?” He asked. 

“I’m game if you are,” you said. Kevin took the lead by pouring tiny shots for you both in each glass. He pushed your glass towards you.

“You can go first,” he said.

You tapped the glass and thought about a good question to ask. “I’ll go easy. What’s a secret you’ve never told anyone?” 

“That’s easy?” He asked.

You nodded. You pointed to his glass. “You can always drink up if that’s too hard on you,” you said.

He smirked. “A secret I’ve never told anyone…I once met my celebrity crush at a mall signing. She signed a poster for me. I…still have it,” he said and smiled.

“Who! Who’s your secret crush?” You asked.

“Aht, it’s my turn. Worst heartbreak?” He asked.

“Easy questions, huh?” You asked.

He shrugged. “You don’t become friends by finding out each other’s favorite colors.”

You thought about it and nodded. You told him about your worst heartbreak and how you dealt with it. How difficult it was to move on from it. 

You went back and forth asking safe, but deep questions that required more than yes or no answers. You learned more about him and if it was possible, you fell for him even more.

“How in the world are you single?” You asked when it was your turn again. 

Kevin chuckled and played with his glass. So far, you had taken a few shots too nervous to answer the questions he asked. He had only taken two. One for when you asked about his parents and one when you asked about his first love. 

“I wish I knew. I date; you make it sound like I hide in my house after work. The shit I see every day, sometimes I just need to get it out of my head. Dating on top of that just seems cruel,” he said. 

You nodded. You could respect that. You had no idea what it was like being a cop. Seeing the worst humanity had to offer and still have to come up with hope for the people who survived. Dealing with the press and the community painting cops as modern day boogeyman. Still. He was too sweet and strong to not have someone. It was criminal. 

“How come you don’t have anyone?” He asked.

You fixed your glasses and shrugged. “May be a surprise to you but guys these days are…nasty. They send unsolicited dick pics, they can’t hold a conversation, and think women owe them something for buying them a drink. Like…I didn’t ask for the drink so why does that mean I have to open my legs or suck them off? Especially when they won’t even go down on a woman!” 

Kevin’s surprised face made you suddenly feel the alcohol loosening your limbs and warming you up. It definitely loosened your tongue. You groaned and rubbed your forehead. “Sorry, that’s TMI,” you said. 

“I would say take a drink every time you apologize, but then this bottle would be gone.”

The word was on the tip of your tongue and you bit it to keep from speaking it. He smirked at your attempt and you rolled your eyes. “You don’t know everything,” you said. Well, the door was open…

“What is your ideal woman?” You asked.

“Ideal? Shit, I just want someone I vibe with. That thinks like me. Has goals,” he said. 

“Beauty? Brains?” You asked.

“Why won’t you go to Molly’s with me?” He asked.

You smiled, remembering that it was only one question per person. “I don’t know anyone. Meeting new people sucks. I don’t have the personality for great first impressions,” you said.

“You know me,” he said. “I would make sure you’re good. And you are great at first impressions. I wouldn’t have rented to you otherwise.”

“You are just being nice like always. Why is it important for me to go to Molly’s?” 

“I want you to feel welcome here. Feel like you belong so you can stay,” he said. 

You ducked your head, playing with your glass. The soft slide of glass on the table was the only sound in the room. Outside, the wind continued to howl as the storm carried on. You shivered, despite feeling toasty from the whiskey. Your skin felt icy. “I moved here, Kevin. That’s about as permanent as it gets.” 

Kevin scooted closer. He had to spread his legs wider to accommodate your chair. The smell of him invaded your senses. The smell of whiskey on him made your head fuzzy. He brought his hand up to caress your cheek. He gently turned your head to look at him.

“This may be the drink talkin’, but you feel this too, right? Between us? If I’m imagining it, let me know now,” he said. 

You looked at his lips and then back up to his eyes. He caught the movement and did the same, his gaze drifting down your face and then back up again. 

“You’re not imagining it,” you said. 

Kevin leaned over and captured your lips in a sweet, tender kiss that warmed you up quicker than the whiskey. You returned the kiss, sighing, tongues dueling with each other. 

“Hmm, knew you’d taste sweet,” he said. He pecked your lips once, twice, and then lingered on the third time humming. 

Emboldened by his actions, you leaned out of your chair. You climbed into his lap, wrapping your hands around his shoulders. Kevin sighed and put his hands on your hips, squeezing every so often. 

“You don’t have to do anything you’re not comfortable with,” he said.

You smiled and kissed him again, rolling your hips. He groaned and his hands went lower to grab your ass. He gripped and massaged your ass, squeezing painfully enough to make you cry into his mouth. He growled hearing the sound, kissing you with more passion after each kiss. 

“I want you, Kevin Atwater,” you said against his lips. 

“Are you sure?” He asked. He leaned back and looked into your eyes. “If you’ve had too much to drink–” 

“Shut up,” you said with a grin and kissed him. 

You had been playing this subtle game between each other for weeks as you signed your lease and moved in. The first time you called him to tell him about your stuck doors, he showed up the next day he was free. He made conversation easy as he fixed the doors. He immediately put you at ease. 

He found that your closet door was stuck too but he didn’t have time to fix it at the time. He told you that he would be back and again, he made it so easy to talk to him and time flew by when he was around. It was like you didn’t have time to think about being nervous when he was telling you about must see attractions to Chicago. He kept talking about the pizza and promised to bring one over.

He made moving there for work not feel so lonely. You were worried if you would find friends outside of work. No matter what, work friends were not true friends. 

You kissed him again, your hands drifting down to start unbuttoning his shirt. The alcohol wasn’t affecting you in the way he thought. It only lowered your natural anxiousness about being bolder. Funner. More open. Going after what you wanted.

Now that you knew you weren’t crazy, that he wanted you as well, a dam broke. Kevin matched your desperateness to get your clothes off as well. 

“I know another way to stay warm,” you said. 

Kevin chuckled. “I told you I can help with whatever you need,” he said. “I keep my promises.” 

You finally got his shirt loose and pushed it off of his shoulders. He had huge muscles, showing off a physique that made you lick your lips in anticipation. His thighs bunched underneath you and you moaned, rolling your hips against his pelvis. 

His erection was thick against his jeans. Kevin grabbed the edges of your shirt and pulled it off you, revealing your bra. He moaned and kissed around your chest. His hands traveled up and down your back, warming it up just like he promised. 

The black tank he wore underneath looked damn good on him but it had to go. He stopped kissing your chest long enough to let you remove it.  Your hands explored his chest while he put his mouth over your nipple through the fabric. 

You moaned, throwing your head back and giving him better access. He took the opportunity you presented and sucked on your titty until the fabric was soaked with his saliva. Your nipple became increasingly sensitive under his attention. You were hissing and shaking by the time he finally let go and admired his handiwork.

He switched to your other nipple, giving it the same love and attention as the first. You squirmed in his lap, unable to stop moving. Your hands moved to the back of his neck and held him to you. He groaned and continued to tug and suckle on your nipple until it was sensitive as well. 

As a big girl, it was not easy to feel small. Dainty. Delicate. But you felt like that in Kevin’s capable hands. You felt worshiped. Adored. The soft light coming from outside made the room feel like a bubble. Like time stopped somewhere outside and you were free to explore. To breathe. To cherish this moment with Kevin. 

He licked the swell of your breast outside of your bra and you moaned. He kissed up your neck until his lips found yours. Until he was nibbling on your lips and licking away the sting. He sucked on your bottom lip and you felt the tug in your pussy. 

You were uncomfortably wet. You felt your arousal dampening your panties. You didn’t know how much longer you would hold out. Or survive. 

“You squirming a lot there. You feelin’ good?” He asked.

“Yes,” you moaned. 

“What I’m gon’ find when I take them panties off?” He asked. 

“Me, excited. Ready for you,” you said.

“Ohh, you a little naughty on top of being sweet?” 

You didn’t have time to answer. Kevin stood up, holding you, cupping your ass so you didn’t slip. He kissed you while he held you. But your heart was thumping. Thundering. “I got you, don’t you even worry,” he whispered against your lips.

The apartment was small so he crossed the space in a few steps to get to your bed. He gently laid you down and stepped back to admire how needy you were. How you stretched out on the bed and made a sublime vision of wantonness. 

He bit his lip with a smirk as he unbuttoned your jeans and tugged them off your hips. Your breathing was rapid, out of control. Your chest rose and fell in quick succession. Your skin felt alive and electric. Like he needed to enter you right this second or you’d spontaneously combust.

“Look at you. Needy little thing,” he commented. His hands spanned the expanse of your thighs, rubbing and kneading. 

“Oh, Kevin,” you moaned. 

“So you ready for me, huh?” He asked. You watched through slitted eyes as he tilted his head. How could he be in control right now? Had it been that long for you? 

You were too busy packing and saying goodbye to family and friends to worry about getting your rocks off. You were too busy working and unpacking in Chicago to worry about finding someone to relieve the pressure. The past few weeks, it had been you and Roman the Rose. 

“I’m so ready,” you said, making him chuckle. 

He took off his shoes, socks, and jeans and you watched him unveil parts of his body you imagined. Lusted over. Pictured way too often to ever tell him the truth. 

“Mhm, we gon’ see,” he said. He joined you on the bed. Kneeling on it, the bed groaned under his weight and you smiled. Your bed had been previously unprepared for someone of his size. He dropped his lips to your chest slowly. When his breath fanned over your nipples, you moaned and twisted away from him.

He completely covered you, however, so there was no place to go. He licked the swell of your breasts again, glancing up at your reactions. You were mesmerized by him. Under his spell. One of his hands slipped up your thigh and you twinged. Goosebumps pebbled your skin but you felt like you were on fire. 

He pressed a thumb over your panties and pushed in, digging the fabric past your pussy lips and groaned at the wet glide of it already. “Oh shit,” you moaned. 

“Hm, look what I found,” he said against your skin. 

His fingers played with your pussy over your panties and you kept moving, twisting, writhing against your bed and underneath him. Every so often, his thumb would grace your pussy lips. That hint of skin to skin contact made you hiss and roll your hips against his hand. 

Kevin used his teeth to drag down the cup of your bra. He grinned finding your dark nipple and then he latched on, swirling his tongue around it in a way that let you know he’d do the same to your pussy when given the chance. 

Your breaths were choppy. Belly flipping. Pussy throbbing. Hands clutching your sheets and yanking. 

Your orgasm was tearing through you, stealing your breath like a thief. Stars exploded behind your eyelids as rippling pleasure traveled throughout your body. Kevin hummed through it all. 

“Look so damn pretty when you cum. Gon’ look even better when I get in there. I bet you’re gonna feel good ridin’ this dick,” he said. His raspy voice was its own brand of magic. Your nipples were still sensitive under his ministrations and the painful tug felt delicious. 

You whimpered. He used his teeth to drag down your other cup and gave it attention as well. His tongue flicking across the dark areola. “Shit!” You moaned.

“Mhm, let me hear it,” he said. His warm breath fanned across the wet spots he left behind and you shuddered. 

“Kevin, please,” you begged.

“Naw, that beggin’ shit don’t work on me,” he said. 

You whimpered once more as he rolled your nipple between his teeth. His hand went back to rubbing your pussy but this time, he finally slipped underneath. His thumb teased the area around your clit, never quite hitting it and teasing you with no mercy. 

“Oh fuuck,” you moaned. You turned your head to the side and bit your sheets, turning distraught at the realization that he was going to take his time with your body. He was an explorer. He was a master conductor fine tuning your body and learning the sounds you were capable of producing. 

He sucked hard on your nipple and your back left the soft sheets, arching away from the bed. “Augh,” moaned. 

At the same time, he dipped a finger into your entrance getting his finger wet up to the knuckle. “Nice and fuckin’ wet. Fuck,” he moaned. 

You hissed as he moved his finger in and out. His thumb continued to tease your clit, never directly touching it. It was a dual sensation that drove you insane and contracted on his finger.

“You gon’ feel this good squeezing on my dick?” He asked.

“Uh-huh,” you said and nodded. Hell yes you would. He just needed to believe you and get inside you already. You moved your hips against his finger and he hummed in appreciation. 

“Oh, impatient too. You wanna cum again?” He asked.

You nodded. “Yes, please, I wanna cum,” you whined, your voice tinny and weak. 

“Good girl, using your words without me having to tell you. A’right, I’ll let you cum,” he said. He pushed a second finger inside you and then began pumping in earnest. His thumb moved to rub circles around your clit and you came instantly, shouting and twitching.

“Shit, shit, shit,” you moaned as you came, eyes rolling into the back of your head. Kevin placed kisses along your chest as you did so, keeping up his particular brand of torture. He slowed down as your breathing returned to normal. 

“Hmm-mm,” I can get used to that,” he said.

You struggled to your elbows and looked at him. “Fuck,” you panted.

He grinned and stood up. He slipped his fingers out of you and then licked them one by one. He moaned, closing his eyes. Fuck. It was the hottest thing you’d ever seen. He licked his fingers like runaway scoops of brownie mix left on the spatula. 

You were getting worked up looking at him. He was distracted. You smirked as you leaned forward and pressed kisses to his stomach. He tensed up at the contact and you looked up at him. 

He grinned at you, grabbing you by the throat. Your eyes fluttered closed. He hummed. He pulled you into a kiss. A wet, sloppy, loud one that made you hiss and scoot closer to him. You were dripping, soaked. Every movement you made called attention to the fact that you were wet as hell.

“I got somethin’ for you, but I wanna eat first. We didn’t get to them cookies you baked,” he said. 

Your eyes turned watery. “Please, let me touch you, Kevin,” you said. 

He planted another kiss on your lips, lingering to swipe his tongue around your lips and diving inside. Your pussy ached. You’d never felt so empty in your entire life. “You’ll get your chance to make sure my dick wet for you. I don’t wanna hurt you when I finally fuck you,” he said.

You sighed painfully through your nose. Your vision swam with tears. You were beyond horny. You didn’t think you were this insatiable. You had two orgasms already but you wanted more. You wanted more from him. 

Kevin licked his lips and removed his hand from your neck.. He rubbed your lips with his thumb and then gave you a sweeter kiss this time around. “Now lean back and let me get to eatin’,” he commanded.

You needed no further encouragement as you flopped back onto the bed. He peeled your panties off, cooing at the dripping mess you were. “Hm-mm,” he sighed. He kissed your thighs as he slipped your panties off. He licked your calf. He threw your panties somewhere behind him and it landed with a soft, wet plop. 

You would have felt embarrassed usually. But there was nothing but pure, uncut lust. You could taste it in the air. Feel it burning you inside and out. 

Kevin hummed, stroking himself through his briefs. He spread your legs and watched as your arousal slowly leaked out of you. You felt it roll down the crack of your ass and shivered. Cool air blasted from somewhere. The wind continued to howl, adding to the soft orchestra of sounds you were currently making. 

Kevin knelt down slowly and got into position between your legs. He put them over his shoulders and yanked you down to the edge of the bed. His arms hooked underneath your legs and spread you open for his meal.

He blew slowly across your wet clit and you shivered. The anticipation was worse. You couldn’t stop moving, shaking, yearning. Kevin laughed and kissed your clit. He hummed. “Taste so fuckin’ good already. You’re so wet, baby,” he said. “Gonna drown in this pretty pussy.” 

“Fuck, Kevin!” You shrieked. 

He chuckled. “Calm down, what you cussin’ for? I ain’t even do nothin’ yet,” he said. 

You whined, rolling your hips. “Please, please, please,” you begged. You couldn’t take this teasing. You weren’t used to it. Had you even had sex before this? You thought you had decent lovers before. Men who knew what they were doing and had you screaming until the cows came home.

But Kevin? Kevin eclipsed any man that came before. You were a virgin all over again. This was your first time and your partner was an expert. A sex demon sent straight from hell. 

“The more you beg, the longer I take,” he said. He licked outside of your pussy lips. He went as far as the seam and pulled back, licking down ‘till he reached your entrance. His tongue just crested the surface of it. 

“Okay, I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” You yelled and huffed. 

Kevin continued to tease you, drawing curses and screams and yells as he explored your body. Your thighs shook violently. Tingles turned to pinpricks against your legs the longer he held them open. 

Wave upon wave of desire flooded your system. Your hands played in his hair as he worked, savoring you. He hummed every so often when you tugged on his hair or made a sound that sounded like you were near death. Near leaving this plane of existence forever.

You stopped trying to plead with him. You become engrossed in the pleasure he was giving you. You and it were one and you surrendered to the feel of him. He finally pushed in further, drawing his tongue close to your clit.

“Auhh,” you croaked.

Kevin kept going, swirling his tongue. His sloppy, loud eating was seduction personified. He sucked so hard that he made noises with your pussy. 

You couldn’t say anything to let him know that you were enjoying yourself. You couldn’t encourage him to keep doing what he was doing. Your mind was gone. Gone on a different trip this time. 

He sighed against your pussy and then flicked his tongue on your clit. It was your undoing. You cried out, pupils blown wide as you came and came and came. Shivers wracked your body. Kevin held you down in his powerful arms, helping you weather the tempest rushing through you.

Your fingers dug into his wild hair and pulled. It didn’t seem to faze Kevin. He continued to eat you out as if searching for the next meal course. He ate you on the way down from the high. You moaned and bit your lip, hoping pain would help dull this type of ecstasy. It did not. 

Kevin smacked his lips as he slowly stopped, rolling his tongue one more time. He leaned back and surveyed his work. You heard him smacking his lips. “Makin’ such a big mess for me,” he whispered. He kissed your pussy and then leaned back. 

Your eyes found his. He smirked. His beard dripped with your essence. Entire lower jaw was wet and you saw trails of your slick in his beard. He rubbed it in, moving his hand to work in what you left on him. 

“How you feelin’, gorgeous?” He asked. 

“Like I died,” you said.

He chuckled. “Well, now you got some work to do. Get this dick wet,” he said.

He helped you into a sitting position. You yelped, feeling the giant pool you made on the edge of the bed. You were definitely going to have to wash these immediately. He grabbed your throat, tearing your thoughts away from the bed and back onto him. 

He leaned down and kissed you. Fuck, you tasted good on him. You smelled yourself and it only turned you on more. He sucked on your bottom lip and then swiped his tongue up. He made out with you and you somehow dripped more. You were a veritable slip and slide at this point. If he entered you, he’d face no resistance.

He pulled back and you smiled goofily at him. He smiled back. “Even better than I been dreamin’,” he said. He leaned back and let you go. You watched as he removed his briefs. Your eyes widened at the size of him. 

He was long and thick, a deadly combination. Maybe all the prep time was more from necessity. Had he tried entering you without lube or without foreplay, that shit would hurt. You were no punk though.

You fixed your glasses and greedily took him into your mouth. You were not as nuanced as he was. You did not have time for games. You had been desperate to touch him, taste him, and explore him in the same way he did to you. You sucked the tip of him and he hissed, hands going to the side of your face.

You pushed past his hands, sucking as much of him down as you could. You used your hands on the area you couldn’t get to. You spat on his dick and used it to let your hands glide better. 

“Sweet fuck,” he moaned. 

You sucked on him, remembering to breathe through your nose so that you didn’t pass out doing this. Your pussy throbbed as he continued to moan and throw his head back, rolling his neck. Your drool slipped past your lips and coated his shaft. You flicked your tongue across his tip and he jerked his hips forward.

His hands on the side of your head gripped you harder and pushed you down on his dick. Deeper than you would normally take someone. You had been worried that you would puke or something. However, you relaxed your throat and worked together to soak his dick with your saliva and make sure that he wouldn’t hurt you on entry. 

“Fuck, right there. Right there,” he moaned. 

You moaned right back, loving the way he took control of his pleasure and used you. “Let me cum in that pussy, baby,” he said.

You looked up at him and he licked his lips. You nodded. “Yef,” you said around his dick.

He slipped out of your mouth and you sucked in deep breaths. Your head was light. Floating. Soaring. You licked your lips and rubbed your cheeks to get the ache out. But Kevin grabbed you roughly and flipped you over on the bed.

“Ouee, shit,” you groaned. You sniffled. Fuck, he was ruining you for any other guy. You would never be able to have sex with anyone else ever again! Was it too early to propose? Was it too early to ask him to move into this tiny apartment with you and deliver this every night on demand? Would that scare him away? 

His large hands wrapped around your waist and pulled you back. One hand left as he guided his dick to your entrance. You sighed. There was no reason to beg him not to tease you. He wouldn’t listen either way. 

Kevin shoved inside in one hard thrust that brought those stars back to your mind’s eye. “Fuuuuuuuuuuuuh,” you moaned. 

As suspected, he slipped in easily thanks to the foreplay and you sucking him off. He groaned as he was fully seated and began rolling his hips, giving you long, deep strokes. He grinded in your pussy and you began to shake and shiver on him. 

“Throw that shit back like you want it,” he said. 

You listened, throwing it back. He was stroking so hard that you couldn’t brace yourself. You dropped down to your elbows and raised your ass higher. He moaned as he stroked deeper, hitting your sweet spot and making your toes curl. 

“Kevin, Kevin, Kevin,” you chanted.

“Yeah, I know I’m hittin’ that shit. Bounce it back,” he said.

You moved your hips faster, matching his pace. He grabbed a fistful of your hair and yanked back. Your head snapped back, a bite of pain on your scalp. “Auh, auh, auh,” you croaked.

His thrusts made your ass clap on him. “Mhm, gripping that shit,” he moaned. He twisted your hair again, yanking your head back a little more and stroking into you with precision. 

“Oue, baby, I’m gonna cum,” you moaned. “I’m cumming, baby.”

“Cum on then. Cum on this dick so I can nut in this pussy,” he said.

You cried. You exploded. You were ripped apart as the orgasm burrowed through your system. Your legs shook and twitched. Your pussy gripped him tight, making him snug as he pounded. 

Kevin continued stroking until he groaned and busted inside of you. Hot pulses of cum signed his name in the crevices of your pussy and you moaned with him. 

He slammed inside of you two more times and stilled, panting. He slowly worked his way out of you and you groaned. You immediately flopped onto the bed. Strength left you. Your energy was gone. 

Kevin’s quiet huffs let you track him through the apartment. You heard water running and then he was back, cleaning you up. You whined, crying and pushing away from him. He cooed at you and gently cleaned you up. 

Sleep tugged at you. You yawned. Kevin returned. You were putty in his hands as he moved you away from the mess you made. “I know another way to warm you up too,” he said.

“Hm,” you sighed. 

He chuckled as he got you out of the puddle. You sighed, curling up now that you were in a dry spot. Kevin placed something onto the wet spot and then got in bed with you, pulling your back into his chest. He spread out covers over you. 

You had just enough thought to take off your glasses and put it on the nightstand next to you. 

His hand came around to rest against your titty, still clad in your bra. He threw one leg over you and your body instantly warmed up. He was a space heater. You snuggled into his warmth and were out like a light, with a giant smile on your face.

The END.

The Secret Kevin Atwater Files

[ughtoomanyfandoms]

Preacher's Daughter - The Last of Us (Joel Miller): Ptolemaea

PREACHER’S DAUGHTER Ptolemaea

series masterlist

Pairing: Joel Miller x OC

CONTENT WARNINGS: 18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI, DEAD PIGEON unprotected sex, religious trauma, gore, violence, swearing, explicit content, sexual violence.

Word Count: 5.1k

Read on AO3 and Wattpad

CHAPTER WARNINGS: READ WITH CAUTION, SUBTLE TORTURE, MURDER, GRAPHIC VIOLENCE, NON-CONSENSUAL

It wasn’t the smell that had her heavy lids peeling open. The smell of iron, of rust, of death.

It wasn’t the rolling of her stomach, churning with emptiness and threatening to purge itself of nothing.

It was the buzzing. A buzzing that followed death, that hovered itself around a stench of rot and something foul. It was muffled at first, a consistent hum, before seeping in to tickle her eardrums. 

A breeze from a cracked window blows against her bare skin. Eyelids heavy, vision blurry, she felt like she was spinning around the room. Her arms hung numb above her, chained and hooked over something to keep her upright. Her toes barely touched the floor. 

The warmth of a body approached her peripheral, the movement of the body blurred in motion. A face appeared in her vision, still too blurry to distinguish their features. The only distinguishable trait was the foul breath that ghosted over her cheeks.

“I followed you,” the voice started, echoing through the air and swirling towards Lianne. A hiss of a snake, a timbre of nothing manly. “I was with you, there. I invited you in, twice.”

Her stomach churns again, goosebumps raising up the skin of her spine, and her nose crinkles as she tries to pull away. 

“I thought I was the only one left… But now you’re here.”

Her head spun, the rotten stench swirling through the air, before darkness consumed her again.

—-

It happened in the university, much faster than any of the three of them expected. A group of raiders, what they thought was less than a dozen, turned out to be more. Lianne thought she’d gotten the last of them, until she heard Ellie screaming for her from down the way. 

It was a scream that vibrated through her skull, her heart dropping to her stomach and a cold sweat creeping down her spine. When she rounded the corner to find Ellie, the young girl was half way down a pile of rubble that led its way to the floor below them. 

“What?” Lianne called to her, feet pushing her forwards to catch up with the young girl.

“It’s Joel,” Ellie called back, voice holding back another scream. 

Her surroundings became a blur as her feet willed her body to the edge of the balcony. Joel lay on the ground below, head rolling in pain, a pool of crimson growing by the second. Before she could even blink she was at Joel’s side, belt sliding off her hips and around his torso. His hand flew to her, his fist gripping onto the sleeve of her jacket as she tightened the belt around him. 

“Hi,” she said calmly to him, forcing her eyes to meet his. Her stomach twisted as she finally met his eyes, the brown glazed over as he gritted his teeth. 

“Go,” Joel grumbled to her. 

Fuck you, is what she wanted to say, spit it in his face and force him to his feet.

“Guys?” Ellie called. “There’s more.”

The voices of the rest of the raiders grew nearer, and Lianne’s attention whipped fiercely to Joel.

“What do you want to do?” She asked flatly. “We can fight ‘em off here, or get you up and outta here.”

The voices drew nearer with each passing second, the steady heartbeat in Lianne’s chest giving her the amount of time before they were screwed.

“Joel!” She snaps, shaking off his fists. “Stay, or up?”

Joel glared at her, eyes fierce through their gaze. 

“Up,” he grunted, reaching for her again. 

“Good,” she sighed, turning this time to Ellie. “Can you cover us?”

“What?” Ellie stammed, eyes glued to Joel bleeding out on the white tile.

“I need you to cover us,” Lianne calls sharply, all patience in her tone gone. “Can you do that?”

Ellie remains frozen in her spot, mouth opening as if to say something. Nothing comes out.

“Ellie!” Lianne snaps, forcing Ellie’s attention on her. Ellie finally gives her a small nod, readying the gun in her hand.

“Fuck,” Ellie mumbles, turning to watch as the men come nearer. 

“Come on, old man,” Lianne grunts as she raises Joel’s arm up and around her, readying herself to pull him from his place. “Gotta get you outta here.”

—-

A force had shifted in her mother. A dark shadow cast over her eyes, her teeth bared almost beastly as she stared at Isaiah.

The sun had begun to set when Isaiah took Ethel from the house. Lianne stayed huddled in her bed, knees tucked up to her chest, scraped shins and cold toes peeking out from her nightgown. She could hear her father, from somewhere out in the woods that bordered the property, sounds of his preaching echoing against the trees. 

It was dark when her parents returned, the reflection of the full moon trapped  in her mothers rattled gaze. She returned damp and pale, teeth clicking together as her jaw trembled, strands of hair stuck to her slick forehead. Eyes sunk and sullen, a darkness surrounding them.

“Your mother isn’t feeling much better, I’m afraid,” Isaiah begins as he steadies Ethel. “She needs some rest.”

The cough started the next day, the fever following soon after. Isaiah had confined Ethel to her bed, his words of explanation that this was God’s way of healing whatever sickness her mother had had from the day before. 

But they needed to pray, and they needed to pray hard.

It was Lianne’s turn that next night to pray with her father. He had led her towards the woods, a wooden altar near the treeline. He knelt with her, praying for forgiveness and for God to heal his wife. Begging Lianne to repent of her sins. 

When they returned to the house, the door to her mother’s room had been left unlatched. Slowly, Lianne pressed an unsteady hand to the door. It had groaned lowly on its hinges, unlike earlier in the day. The rattled breaths of her mother echoed in the dry room, moonlight reflecting on her mother’s pale skin, slick with fever. 

—-

“We need real food,” Lianne says quietly to no one in particular, her gaze never leaving Joel’s pale face. Her knees groan as she pushes herself to her feet, running her palms over the thighs of her jeans. “I’ll head out, see what’s out there.”

“I’ll come with you,” Ellie pipes from her position near Joel. She shared a quarter of a granola bar with Lianne earlier, her stomach turning in on itself in hunger.

“Can’t leave Joel here alone,” Lianne says as she shakes her head. 

“Then let me go,” Ellie bargains. “You stay here with Joel. I can go out.”

“Ellie-”

“I can do it,” Ellie says sharply, following quietly with, “I’m tough.” 

Lianne sighs heavily, her eyes softening.

“I know you are,” Lianne replies.

“I can take care of myself,” Ellie continues.

“You have,” Lianne agrees. “You still do. You always will. I’ve just joined in, too. Now we take care of each other.” 

Ellie’s silent at that, too hungry to put up much of an argument. Ellie settles herself along Joel’s side, tucking in the corners of his blanket around him, and Lianne leaves them. 

The wind had picked up a bit, a slight whistle to it as it blew through the subdivision. 

Sure, she could track her prey. The footsteps were easy enough to find in the snow, staying downwind and keeping a good distance between herself and the animal. But Joel was the professional, his stealth to an entirely new degree. He would’ve given her shit about losing the rabbit she had been after, and said some kind of witty remark about being a city girl. And he would’ve been proud that she tracked down a buck, readied her bow, and released.

The arrow hits its target, and the deer sprints out of sight as it wails. 

She hisses a curse, pushing herself through the snow to track the trail of the blood the deer leaves. Her steps are quiet and calculated, avoiding the crunch of the snowfall. The trickle of blood is bright on the white snow, the hoof prints frantic as they scatter the forest floor. 

The deer huffed to a slump, a long and last groan wheezing its way out from its chest before it stilled on the floor of an opening. Lianne kept herself hidden behind a tree, about to step foot after the deer, before the sound of voices had her pressing herself further into the tree. 

“I don’t see anybody,” one of the voices, a deep and brassy voice, hushes. “Think we can just take it?” 

“Yeah, quickly,” another voice, with even more brass, responds. “Whoever shot it’s probably nearby. 

The two walk around the deer, examining and sizing it up. Lianne is feather-light across the snow, bow raised as she approaches the two men.

“Don’t,” she calls out, voice strong and steady, echoing in the clearing. “Drop your rifles. Turn and face me, slowly.”

The first man that had spoken obeyed immediately, slow movements as he began to drop his rifle before the hand of the man next to him reached out to stop him. 

“You’re quite the hunter,” the second man said, his ginger hair fiery in the morning sun. “We didn’t even hear you coming.”

“Turn around,” Lianne says again, firmly. “And walk away.”

“Okay,” he says nonchalantly, raising his hands upwards. “But all I ask is ten seconds of your time. I just wanna talk.”

“I won’t say it again,” Lianne says flatly, the twang in her voice she tried to suppress seeping it’s way through her tongue. 

“Please, just ten seconds,” he asks again, teeth showing in a small smile. “My name is David. This is my friend, James. We’re from a larger group and we're all very, very hungry.”

“I got people too,” Lianne says cooly. “Also hungry.”

“Well, even so…” David continues. “You look mighty strong, but you can’t drag this back on your own. We’re not asking for charity, we can trade you for some of the deer. What do you need? We have everything. Boots, medicine-”

Lianne’s ears perk at that, a glimpse of a reminder of Joel laying sweaty and cold on that basement floor. And her stomach grumbles, hackles raised in desperation at just wanting to take the deer back to Joel and Ellie. He had screamed when Lianne sunk the needle into his skin, passing out briefly from the pain as she attempted to sew him up. His fists had locked around her wrists, praying for her to get away. He wouldn’t survive if he didn’t get help, get medicine for the infection that grew around his aching wound. She knew that, but she didn’t want to show her cards.

But fuck it. 

“What kind of medicine?” She calls to the men, arrow remaining notched, string remaining taught, and bow remaining ready.

“Got a bunch of antibiotics and stuff, back in our village,” he responds.

Bingo.

“You’re welcome to follow us.”

Lianne slackens the bow, quilling the arrow and slinging the bow across her shoulder. Only to replace it with the rifle she had slung across her pack, pulling it up to her shoulder to aim back at David.

“I’m not following you anywhere,” Lianne says dryly. “Your buddy can go get it. He comes back, you get half the deer. Anyone else shows up, I put one right between your eyes.”

David turns to James, instructing him quietly but still just loud enough for Lianne to hear. Hesitantly, James looks back to Lianne, squinting in her direction before slowly backing from David. Once he’s far enough away, he turns to make his way back to the village. 

Now that it’s just her and David, she relieves herself from her post near the tree, rifle remaining locked on him. And she slowly approaches.

His hands are still held in the air, watching her as she nears.

“It’s gonna be a while… before James gets back,” he says. “I have some oil and matches in my pack. We could take shelter, start a fire.”

Lianne only nods towards the deer, nudging the gun in that direction.

“Bring him with us,” she instructs.

—-

She snaked her way back through the woods, panic beating loud through her veins. She followed the path she had come from, careful to land each footstep in the ones formed earlier. She knew she’d be easy to track, that the hunters were just giving her a head start. But she needed to save Joel. She needed to save Joel.

Fuck, fuck, fuckfuckfuck.

She bursts through the door of the garage, nearly knocking it off its hinges. The horse lets out a startled snort as Lianne hurries past it. Her footsteps are heavy on the kitchen floor, letting Ellie know she’s back. When she reaches the door to the basement, her hand shakes as it reaches for the knob. She forces herself to take a breath, relax her hunched shoulders, brushes the hair out of her face and tucks it behind her ears, and pulls the door open with a steady hand.

Joel’s paler, skin a green-gray, and each breath is pulled in a painful shiver. His eyes are red, hands gripped in a white-knuckled fist under his sleeping bag. Lianne freezes when she sees him, hand flexing at her side.

“How is he?” she asks quietly. 

“He’s still breathing,” Ellie responds in a sigh, chin tucked over her knee as she sits next to Joel.

“Good,” Lianne answers with a nod, finally approaching the two of them. “I got medicine. Should help.”

Ellie whips her head around to look at Lianne, mouth gawking in shock. 

“Long story,” Lianne says flatly. “Couldn’t get us any food.”

“That’s okay,” Ellie says quietly, eyes still timidly peering at Lianne. 

Lianne slowly begins to unzip the side of Joel’s sleeping bag, heart clenching at the shiver that continues to rake through his body. With gentle fingers, she begins undoing the button of his jeans.

“Help me roll him over,” she whispers to Ellie. Her stomach drops at the borderline scream Joel lets out as the two of them roll him to his side. She quickly brushes his gray curls with a cold hand, her face falling flat as Ellie’s pulls into a grimace.

“Why are we-” Ellie begins, but Lianne quickly cuts her off.

“I gotta put…” she begins before her voice falls short. She pulls the vile from her inside pocket, trying to keep her hands from trembling as she readies the needle. “I gotta put it in his ass.”

A soft, oh, falls from Ellie’s lips, her face paling at the sight of Joel’s pained face. 

“Just keep him steady for me, okay?” Lianne instructs, and Ellie gives a stiff nod. Joel manages to grip Ellie’s hands in one of his own, eyes squeezed shut as Lianne pushes the needle into his skin and pumps him with penicillin. Once the needle is empty, she slowly rolls him back down onto his back, wary of the stitches that cover each side of him. She tucks his sleeping bag around him again, holding her breath as she watches his face relax as he becomes unconscious again. 

Ellie lets out a sigh, gaze hesitant on Lianne. Lianne releases a breath, falling back to sit on her heels as she closes her eyes. She urges Ellie to get some rest, saying she’ll stay up for watch. She tries to keep her breaths steady as her heartbeat thrums loud in her ears, trying to keep aware of any creaking footsteps in the snow.

The footsteps came in the morning, birds cawing in the trees nearest the house. The voices of men had Lianne up on her feet, adrenaline causing a black out as her focus zeroed out. 

“Take this,” she’d said sternly, shoving her shotgun into Ellie’s hands, but not letting go until she added, “Anybody comes through that door, you shoot.”

“What if it’s you?” Ellie asks, eyes still wide with panic as she tracks Lianne towards the basement steps.

“That’s up to you,” Lianne responds before turning around.  “You stay here, and stay alive. Keep him alive.” 

—-

They said it was consumption that had taken her. The fever was too much for her frail body, a strange and rapid decline that had her breathless in a matter of days. 

She had wanted to be by her mother’s side, wiping away the sweat with a damp cloth. Whenever she would peer between the crack of her mother’s door, her father’s footsteps would creak along the floorboard and she would hide herself in her room.

She prayed the rosary, pleaded for forgiveness, repented for her sins. Tried to believe she was praying hard enough for God to save her mother.

She knelt outside the door of her mother’s room, whispered prayers hushed into clasped fists. 

“There’s nothing you can do…” Her father says from behind her, a pale hand reaching out for her.

“Dad?” A mumbled whisper falls from her lips, head hung between her shoulders as her eyelids struggle to open.

A soft laugh echoes around her, the closeness of the warm breath causing her to pull her chin into herself.

“You can call me that,” David says suggestively. “Daddy… Father.”

A snarl gets lost in her throat as a cold finger reaches out to push the hair from her face, and she tries to pull her head back before the cold fingers latch around her jaw.

“Why you got me all hung up?” She asks through his grip.

“You’re a dangerous person. You’ve certainly proven that. You love blood too much,” he whispers, leaning in close to breathe her in. “But not like I do.”

Her arms were growing numb above her, strung up like skinned cattle as she swayed in his grasp. His eyes were like glass, threatening to cut straight into her skin. 

“I saw you,” he hushes. “Felt you, gave you. You have a violent heart. And I should know, I’ve always had a violent heart. I’ve struggled with it for a long time…”

She finally lifts her gaze to meet him, locking her fierce glare on him. Her nostrils flared, her lips pulled up at their edges. His eyes were on fire, the knowledge of the undesirable burning bright within them. 

She wants to hiss at him, spit in his face. Don’t fucking look at me.

“You don’t have to say yes to me,” he hisses right back at her. James appears behind him, a blurry shadow in the entry of the room. David orders him to take Lianne down, and the pain that sears through her shoulders rushes with the warmth of blood to her arms. 

She slumps to the cold cement, James barely attempting to hold her upright. She faces the cell next to her former, her eyes casting their gaze to an object in the middle of it. A pair of pink underwear lies bloody on the floor, and her blood runs hot. She turns to lock her eyes with David’s, and she can see it in his eyes.

“What have you done?” She snarls through clenched teeth.

David bends slowly to reach her gaze, hands resting casually on his knees as his lips twitch. He pulls himself closer to her, whispering slowly in her ear. “There’s nothing you can do,” his lips brush against her ear. “That’s already been done.” 

He pushes himself up straight, pulling in a deep breath before nodding towards James.

“Hit her again,” David says from behind her, and a crack against the back of her skull has her unconscious. All she can think about is Ellie.

—-

Joel’s bloodied fist became beaten as he landed blow after blow to the face of the man in front of him. His other fist gripped the man’s shirt, pulling him up from his position in the red chair to better pummel the man’s face. 

Ellie stands century in the corner away from the action, rifle ready in her fidgety hands, eyes trained on Joel.

“Stop…” the man pleads, eyes watery as blood spills from his nose. “Stop, please.”

An agonizing groan fell from split lips, a sickening thud of Joel’s fist cracking against his jaw. 

“Leave him alone,” another man pleads from his propped up position at the wall, voice straining as he begs. He’s sat with his hands tied, the sounds of the beating rounding his peripheral. 

“You’re next,” Joel all but growls, words spitting through gritted teeth.

“Please…” the man whispers again. Blood spits from his lips, his sweaty brow and swelling eye clouding the image of Joel in front of him. A beast from the woods, the hunter becoming the hunted. Joel’s eyes are empty, locked on the man in front of him. 

He wipes his cracked knuckles on the side of his pants, pulling his switchblade from his back pocket in swift movements. The blade shines in the light of the afternoon sun as it swings open, the reflection of the blade glinting in the wide eyes of the man Joel faces. A small smirk crosses Joel’s lips, teeth shining in a sneer, as his knife finds home in the thigh of the man. 

The man on the floor calls weakly to his partner, making Joel plunge the blade in further.

“No, no, no,” Joel says quickly, tapping the butt of the knife. “He can’t help you. You focus right here, or I’ll pop your fuckin’ kneecap off.”

“She’s alive,” the man in front of him responds quickly, voice breaking between syllables. 

“Where?” Joel growls, 

The man lets out a string of loud curses, before the words tumble from his lips: The town.

“What town?” Joel roars, face inches from the man in front of him. His blood begins coursing through him, the pain in his side subsiding as adrenaline takes over. He’s on autopilot, barely hearing the man say the words Silver Lake. 

“A resort?” Joel huffs, breath fanning over the broken man. The man stays silent, biting his lip to hold in his words. Joel wraps his fist around the knife, a yell echoing through the room as he pulls it from the flesh.

Joel places the handle of the bloodied knife into the man’s mouth, ruffling open a map that he splays flat so the man can see.

“You’re gonna point to where we are… And where your resort is,” Joel begins to instruct, his voice hushed. Venom drips from his teeth,  “And it better be the exact same spot your buddy points to.”

—

Her vision is just as fuzzy when she begins to regain consciousness. And she feels like she’s on fire, being split open from the inside out. The room moves around her, jostled rhythmically as wood scrapes along her back.

The ringing in her ears blocks out all noise around her, the buzzing of the flies still the only distinguishable noise she can pinpoint. Finally, breaking her focus, is the soft grunts of someone above her. Her eyes roll to the back of her head briefly, willing herself to stay conscious.

Stop.

Her limbs are numb, her head can barely roll around to take in her surroundings. His fingernails dig into the flesh of her hips, pulling himself further into her.

Stop.

Her head lulls to the side, that pink pair of underwear catching her gaze. 

Stop.

Her fingers twitch, brushing along the handle of something that lays next to her. David sits in the corner, watching with his hands in his pants. 

Stop.

It begins in her chest, somewhere deep in the bottom of her ribcage. It builds slowly, a wave rolling over into mountains. She takes in a short breath, fingers wrapping around the handle of the thing next to her. It rattles up through her chest, churning behind grit teeth. 

It escapes, a scream ripping from her throat, bubbled up from the depths of her chest. A soul piercing scream, world ending and none forgiving.

She swings her arm through the air, the glint of a machete blade catches her eye before it lands in the neck of that man above her. She uses the leverage to roll herself off the butcher table and onto the cement floor, scrambling to her feet to propel herself towards the door. David shouts behind her, words drowned out by the echoing of her own scream. A glimpse of a pile of her clothes catches her eye at the front of the room, and she scoops up what she can before rushing out the door.

Her feet hit the cold tile, the smell of burnt meat wafting over her. Her pulse throbs violently through her skull, the rhythmic beating threatening her vision. Her gasping breaths become steady as she straightens, willing herself to stay focused. A spark of an ember catches her eye, forcing her towards a small fire under a hanging pot. First instinct, she takes a smoldering stick from the pile, the embers still smoking violently as she continues through the kitchen. 

He calls for her tauntingly, tells her there’s no way out. 

You don’t know how good I am! He calls out. You don’t know what I could’ve given you, if you had just let me! You can’t hide from me forever.

When he enters her field of vision, she throws before she can think, the fiery plank of wood narrowly missing his head and landing in the burgundy curtains behind him. 

“Neither one of us is dying today,” he sneers. “I’ve changed my mind. I’ve decided you do need a father. So I’m gonna keep you… And I’m gonna teach you.”

The yell that escapes her forces her body to move, lunging towards him mindlessly. He blocks her first blow, hand readying itself with a blade that remains firm in his grasp. Quickly, Lianne twists his wrist at the same time he thrusts it forward. She uses the weight of herself to push at his arm, his own blade piercing him in the gut. He swings a powerful blow, knocking her away from him and she stumbles to the floor. 

Her eyes flutter and the room spins, breaths become gasps as the room fills with flames. A foot connects with her side, all air knocked from her as she falls to the side. The corners of her vision blacken, speckles of nothing crossing her mind. 

She’s rolled to her back, and she’s thankful for a moment at the quick breath she’s able to retrieve. David hovers over her, and she fumbles to push herself away from him. He crawls himself on top of her, a wolf coming to take the suffering. His hands latching against her wrists to hold them in place above her head as she spits at him, willing the venom of her tongue to seer its way into his flesh.

But he only chuckles, fangs shining in the light of the flames.

“I thought you already knew,” he taunts again. “The fight is the part I like the most.” 

She lets out a frustrated scream, face crumpled in exhaustion as her body betrays her. She wills herself to move, to break free of his grasp, but she only becomes more dizzy.

“Don’t be afraid,” he whispers above her. “There’s no fear in love.”

The positions of the two are switched in an instant, the sudden fear in David’s eyes fueling the fire that burns through her veins. She had reached the machete that had dropped earlier, slashing it aimlessly towards David to get him off of her. He had stumbled back with a groan, holding a hand to his chest.

She is not merciful, and she is not kind, and she was not afraid to make him wish that she was.

He pleads with her, only for a second, before that same machete swings over her frame and into his flesh. 

The crackle of the wooden frames around her bleed their way into something else, the rattle of her mother’s lungs surrounding her. Angry, wrathful, bellowing screams shake from her body, her rampage continuing as she strikes the machete again and again.

She hovers above his disfigured form, a flash of a man lying lifeless on reddened snow from years before makes her shake her head in disbelief. Her panting breaths pull in smoke, lungs burnt as flames continue to lick around the room, threatening to pull closer to her skin. 

She is nothing but a dark silhouette amongst the flames, heaving and threatening over David’s lifeless body as her fist grips around the handle of the machete. She looks to her bloodied hand, heart threatening to beat its way out of her chest as her fist shakes. 

When she forces herself out of the burning lodge, the winter air is a respite to her burning form. Her eyes still held the light of the flames, fierce against the white snow. Her lungs burn with the crisp air, the fog of her breath a reminder of being alive. 

A firm grip latches itself around her arms, and all she can do is scream and thrash. The will to fight is fading, and tears threaten to spill from her eyes. Her voice is pleading, and it breaks as she begs to be let go. A voice responds repeatedly, but the pathetic tone of her own voice is all she can hear. 

She’s spun around quickly, met with the dark canvas jacket and green, bloodied flannel. Her voice trails off, eyes lifting upwards to see the face that blocks the sun. 

“It’s me,” she finally hears. Her eyes search his, deep brown crinkled in a deep frown. She’s breathing again, a panicked rhythm to the harsh breaths she pulls in. “Hey… Look. It’s me, it’s okay.”

Her fists latch on to his coat, a tearless sob breaking from her chest as her knuckles freeze in the cold. 

“Joel-” her voice breaks. “He tried- I couldn’t-” 

Her eyes are wide with fear, a sight that sent a chill through his spine, like that poor thing in the road he’d found all those years ago. 

Ellie’s name falls from her lips in the form of an apology, and Joel’s eyes search her face in forgiveness.

A figure steps into view from around Joel, Lianne’s wild eyes locking on them. The young girl is pale in shock, her knuckles red from the cold as they kept themselves latched onto Lianne’s pack. Lianne’s heart races in realization, her eyes casting back to meet Joel’s.

“It’s okay,” he whispers again, and she closes her eyes at the sound of his voice. She falls into him, a broken sob falling from her as he wraps her in his arms. “It’s okay, angel. I got you.” 

His jacket is pulled from his shoulders and wrapped around Lianne’s hunched form. Ellie had fallen into step at Joel’s side, his arm over her shoulder as she aided his pained walking. But his pain was numbed by the weight of Lianne’s body pressed into his, each of them taking the weight of the other as they walked towards the river.

[best-jrwi-fic-quotes]

This is my fic (Hiding in Your Shadow) by me (Snall) on Archive of Our Own (ao3)

I can't think of what else to write which, as a writer, should be worrying.

-

[emotionaloof]

so i might be obsessed with those two

[whump-imagines]

Backup

Jay x reader

Wc: 920

Reader is in intelligence and goes to talk to a suspect alone. Kind of inspired by the episode when Erin gets held hostage. Also Connor didn't leave. Because it's my fic and I can do what I want.

---

As soon as the suspect pulled the knife out of his pocket, you heard Jay’s words echo in your head 'just wait for me to get there'.

You had just assured him you could handle one interview on your own.

The knife swung towards you and you managed to dodge it and throw a punch. Then you were in an all out brawl trying to disarm this suspect without getting stabbed.

You heard the door crash open followed by Jay shouting your name.

In the moment of distraction, the knife suddenly connected across your abdomen. You curled into yourself and then lost your balance as you dodged another blow.

From your back on the ground you kicked at the suspect trying to regain control of the situation. Kicking and trying to roll out from below him, he managed to slice once more across your thigh just above your knee.

“Drop the knife!” Jay shouted from the doorway. The guy hesitated and Jay tried again. “Drop it and put your hands up!”

“Okay!” The guy bent like he was going to comply but then straightened and took off running out the back door.

“Suspect is on foot out the back door. He is armed,” Jay relayed into his radio.

You heard Adam and Kevin confirm they had eyes on him and were in pursuit.

Knowing they would catch him, you relaxed onto the floor exhausted from fighting. You knew you should assess your injuries but you just wanted a moment.

Next thing you knew, Jay was kneeling beside you. “Shit, shit,” he cursed. He grabbed a dish towel from the counter before speaking into his radio again as he pressed the towel to your abdomen. “I have an officer down. Deep laceration to the femoral artery.” He ripped off his belt and wrapped it around your leg and tightened it.

“It's fine. It doesn't even hurt.” You tried to stop him from fully tightening his belt.

“It's not fine. You already lost too much blood, you're in shock.” He managed to tighten the belt enough to slow the blood flow causing you to scream in pain. He pulled the towel away from the second cut and sighed in relief. “That one doesn't look too deep.”

You just nodded. Suddenly everything hurt and you were cold. “I'm tired.”

He gently tapped your cheek and forced your eyes to meet his. “You stay awake. Medics will be here any second.”

“Jay?” You hear Sylvie shout from towards the front of the house.

“Back here!” Jay answers. Then he turns his focus to you. “You hear that? Sylvie and Violet are here. They'll get you to Med and we'll get you all patched up.”

“Hey,” Violet greets as she kneels down beside you. “What happened?”

“Knife wounds,” Jay explained. “She needs a better tourniquet on her leg. Belt slowed it but it's not enough. She's also got a shallow one across her stomach.”

“BP is low and she's tachy,” Sylvie added. “We should go.”

“This is going to hurt,” Violet told you before horrible pain shot through your leg. You heard velcro and then the jingle of Jay’s belt buckle as it was removed from your leg.

Sylvie handed an IV bag to Jay and then leaned so you could see her. “I'm going to give you something for the pain and then we'll get you to Med. How's that sound?”

“Sounds good.”

By the time they were loading you into the ambulance you were struggling to stay awake. Soon after the doors closed you lost that fight.

You hear Jay talking. Why is he talking so loud when you're trying to sleep? You groan, hoping he will get the message and be quieter.

“Y/N?” Jay is closer now. “Are you awake?”

Groaning again, you shake your head. “Shh.”

He chuckles. “No, shh. I need you to open your eyes for me, sweetheart.”

You hear the hiss of air and then something is squeezing your arm. Confusion finally makes you crack open your eyes. As soon as you look around, you realize you're in the hospital and then you remember the fight and the knife.

“Hi.” He runs his hand over your head and presses a kiss to your forehead. “How're you feeling?”

“Hi,” you croak and then cough. Jay grabs a cup of water for you to sip. Clearing your throat you try again. “Hi. Um, I feel okay. Tired. Maybe a little dizzy.”

He nods. “Any pain?”

You take a moment to access. You shift slightly, testing. There's a slight burn as the gown shifts over your stomach and a bit of an ache in your leg. “Nothing unbearable.”

Just then, the door opens and Connor enters. “Hey, glad you're awake.”

“Yeah. Can I go back to sleep now?” you asked. “Better yet, can I go home?”

“No. You'll be here until tomorrow at a minimum,” he explained. “I need you off that leg for now.” He moves the blanket and checks your stitches then moves to check the pulse in your foot. “Everything looks good. Get some rest.”

“Thanks, man,” Jay walks over to shake Connor's hand.

“Yeah, thanks!” you add before he can leave the room.

You yawn as the door closes. Jay takes your hand in his and peppers kisses to your knuckles. “Do me a favor…”

“Hmm?” You hum trying to stay awake.

He presses one more kiss to the back of your hand. “Next time, don't go in without backup.”

You snort. “Yeah, deal.”

[fangirlfrom-hell]

Exciting ||Jay Halstead x Daughter and reader

Jay has to take his daughter to work for the first time and he’s not excited about it.

For the one that voted Jay x daughter on the poll (this is not a Christmas story though)

Jay wasn’t comfortable with the idea of taking his 4 years old daughter to work, but seemed like luck was not on his side. The girl was on vacation, Y/N was on a work trip, the nanny got sick, Will was on shift and the little girl’s grandparent’s couldn’t take care of her all day long, so he had no choice. He called Voight, who with his raspy voice and without any problem said “Bring her.”

He sighed, “Ok, baby girl. You are coming to work with me today” He notified his little daughter who was sitting with her short legs hanging from the couch.

“To the police station?” Her eyes were shining bright out of excitement.

“Yea”, her dad chuckled. “Mommy will pick you up later, when she comes back home from her trip, ok?”

“Okay. I am excited!” Excited was the last feeling she learned in school and from then on she would use it for everything.

“I am excited too”, he lied, he was more nervous than anything. “Go get your backpack”, he ordered and when she was gone he muttered to himself, “I’m already running late”

It wasn’t common to take one’s son or daughter to the bullpen, but is wasn’t so strange either. Voight and Al had done it in the past with their kids; Burgess and Adam had done it with Malayla too, even Kevin had to take his little sister from time to time. This was the family Hank talked about.

Jay went upstairs with a small pink and shinny backpack with unicorn form on his arm, making a funny contrast with the gun hanging from his hips.

“Where’s the baby girl?” Adam said when he saw his friend arriving alone.

“Platt stole her from me”, he answered. He would have arrived even later if he had waited for Trudy to give her back to him. Kim smiled at the image.

“We haven’t seen her in a while”, Al peeked his head from his hidden desk to participate in the conversation, “A bit of her cheerfulness will do good to this place”

“Well, she is, and I’m quoting, “very excited” to see you all”, the proud dad smirked.

But as much excited as she was, the baby Halstead was very shy to even say good morning to them. As soon as Trudy Platt carried her upstairs, the girl ran towards her father as fast as she could.

“Why are you crying?” Jay asked in a very low voice, while sitting her on his lap.

But the one answering the question was Platt, “She started to worry when she noticed you weren’t around downstairs and then silently started crying”

Ashamed, the little Halstead girl hugged her dad’s neck and buried her face on his shoulder. A chorous of “aw” was heard around. This wasn’t what she expected, visiting the police station didn’t make her feel excited after all.

“It’s alright”, Jay kept whispering into her ear. It was only after a few minutes later that she calmed down, but even when she was acting as if nothing had happened, she was still embarrased.

Al passed by from the coffee room to his desk and handed a coockie to the girl. She hesitated on accepting it, she first turned to her dad who nodded in approval and she stretched her tiny arm to take it.

“Precauted girl. Good”, Olinsky smiled at her and she smiled back.

“Why don’t you take your colors and get to work in your coloring book, hm?” Jay said more like an order as he put her down. He couldn’t really advance in his work if she was there right beside him.

They walked to an unoccupied desk right infront of Adam. The girl climbed the chair as her dad took her belongings out of the unicorn backpack, “There you go. I’ll be right there if you need me. Remember to…”

“…be quiet, shhh” his daughter completed.

She stayed there for a while, coloring different pages. The detectives, specially Kim, would praise her artistic work whenever they had to walk by her side. She liked Kim, that woman was funny, but she couldn’t really take her eyes off of the man who had gave her the cookie: Alvin Olinsky, but he was too busy to noticed.

“Daddy”, she silently stood up an whispered, trying not to distract the people around, “I don’t want to color anymore. I want to draw”

“Uh, let me check if I have something for you to—“

“I have some white sheets in here”, Hailey opened a drawer and handed a bunch to the Halstead girl. She liked Hailey too, she had a bright smile.

“How do you say?” Her father encouraged her before going back to her place.

“Thank you, Hailssss”

She was immersed in her own world, drawing, coloring and cutting. She stood up to get closer to Adam and touched his leg to call his attention.

“How do you write ‘I love you’?” She asked the detective.

“Oh!” He took a notebook and a pen, “Very easy, let me just show you”

Jay looked up to witness the scene, altough he couldn’t hear any word they were exchanching, “Hey, sweetie”, he called out, “Let Ruz work, ok?”

“No big deal” His collegue said handing her the sheet.

A few minutes later, the little girl stood up once more to go with her father. She stretched her hand to hand him a very colorful circle of paper.

“Wow! Is this for me?” Jay exxagerated his emotion, and then melted when he read the phrase ‘I love you’ followed by a crooked heart.

With excitement, she explained it was a cup holder: “Yea, you can put your mug there”. Following orders from such a smooth voice, Jay placed his mug over the gift.

“Just what I needed” He kissed her head. When she withdrew of his side, Jay immediatly took the paper with the witten phrase and placed it in a spot where he was able to see it all the time.

Before going back to sit on her chair, the girl passed by Al’s desk and stood next to him staring, until he finally noticed.

She took him by surprise, a cute surprise, “Hey, you scared me!” That made her laugh.

“What do you like the most?” The kid asked wothout any other introduction, “Ducks or unicorns?”

Detective Olinsky took his time to answer the question. He observed that Halstead’s daughter was wearing a T-shirt full of unicorns, her pink shinny backback also had the shape of a unicorn, so he went by that, thinking it would be the correct answer.

“Unicorns, I love unicorns”

But she didn’t had the reaction he expected, instead she sadenned, “Oh! I was going to draw a duck for you”

Being in a space close to Olinsky, and paying attention to what his daughter was doing all the time, Jay listened and couldn’t help to smile to the reaction of his parter.

“Oh, well, I love ducks too!” Alvin tried to amend his error.

“A duck, then?”

“Yea, a duck!”

And she moved her tiny legs as fast as she could. Both detectives shared a look and laughed.

It didn’t pass a lot of time when the girl was next to Olinsky’s chair again, but this time he noticed. Without speaking, she handed to him the drawing of a duck happily swimming in a lake.

“What? Is this for me?” She nodded. There was something peaceful in his voice that she liked. “Thank you very much! I really love it. What’s this?” He pointed to a brown circle tha was close to the animal. The answer make him smile showing his teeth.

“A cookie”

“Well, this masterpiece deserves to be in a special place” The detective took a bit of tape and pasted the drawing where it could be seen by everyone.

Little Halstead ran to his father to tell him what just had happened.

“That’s not fair!” Adam teased her later on the day. “I want my own drawing too! I showed you how to write that phrase, you gotta remember that!”

“It will have to be another day”, Jay intervened. “Time to pick everything up, your mom’s on her way to pick you up”

“Mommy’s back?” She asked with the same bright eyes she had when realizing she was going to the police station.

“Yeah!” Her dad smirked.

“I am excited!” She stated while putting her stuff back into the backpack.

“Say goodbye, time to go. Mommy’s downstairs”

She waved her little hand to everybody in the bullpen, “Bye bye”. She even peeked her head into Voight’s office, “Goodbye, Serge”

“You are leaving already? Goodbye, little one�� Hank said in a very friendly tone, “Come back soon, whenever you want”

She laughed at the idea, “I will”

It was a bit hard for her to walk down the stairs. “Do you need help?” Jay asked with his arms opened to carry her and she jumped to him.

As soon as she spotted Y/N at the desk with Trudy she yelled at her. Jay put her down on the floor when the stairs were over and his baby ran towards her mom, who picked her up in a tight hug.

“Mommy!”

“Ugh, how much I missed you” Y/N said covering their daughter in kisses.

“Me too!”

“Did the detectives threated you good?” Trudy asked, “How was your day at daddy’s work, hm?”

Wothout hesitating and with a lot of emotion, the girl answered “Oh! It was exciting!”

[topguncortez]

Blow to the Head - J. Halstead

whumptober masterlist || previous day

prompts: slurred words

synopsis: you had always dreamed of being a police officer, but one bad accident left you with a lifetime of pain. Luckily for you, Jay is the perfect person to be by your side.

warnings: car accident, swearing, mentions of child crimes, mentions of sex trafficking crimes, mentions of passing out, mentions of vomiting, slurring words, intense pain

word count: 1.9k

You knew from a young age that you wanted to be a police officer. Your father was, and there was something about watching him protect and save the people of the city that had you wanting to follow in his footsteps. He always reminded you that it was a daily sacrifice, that some days were easier than others. Some days, he got to do the easy things like write traffic tickets and do school yard crossing. Other days, he was arresting people for warrants or having to tell a total stranger that their loved one was killed. You were prepared to make those sacrifices, prepared for those tough days that came with the job that you so badly wanted. 

And you did get that job. You got to have your perfect job for three years. One of those years was spent in a patrol squad, before you and your partner, Jay Halstead, caught the eye of Hank Voight, the captain of the intelligence unit. You knew of Hank’s reputation from your father, and knew that he didn’t extend the invite to join the unit very often. You took the spot without thinking, easily falling into the groove of the unit. It was tough work, and sometimes the bad days outweighed the good by a long shot. But those good days. . . those good days were your favorite. 

It was one bad day that took your entire life from you in an instant. 

It was going to be a routine bust, you and Jay waiting in your jeep on the side of an abandoned warehouse, waiting for Hank’s call to move in. It had been months of creeping in on a local gang leader who had been involved in a sex trafficking ring involving children. To you, the cases involving kids hit harder. They were the most innocent group, and the easiest to be attacked. You had a chip on your shoulder the whole time while working the case, chomping at the bit to get this guy. 

“Come on, Hank,” You muttered, looking out your car window, “Come on, come on, come on.” 

“Patience,” Jay hissed, as annoyed as you are, “This guy is skittish. We move too early and we lose everything.” 

“Or we lose more kids,” You shook your head, going to reach for the walkie when gunshots fired off. 

“I lost him! Out the back!” Hank’s voice crackled over the radio, “Blue car! I got kids here!” . 

“Shit! I’m going in, chase after him!” Jay said, jumping out of the car, and running into the building. You quickly put the car in drive, going straight to the back of the building, easily spotting a blue car. You pressed down firmly on the gas, sending your jeep flying through the city of Chicago. You almost had him, closing in closer and closer, maneuvering the car so you could side swipe him. That was, until a black SUV came out of nowhere, plowing into the driver’s side. You felt your head slam against the airbag as it deployed in your face, your body jerking as the car came to a stop. 

The accident hadn’t totally crippled you. You had to have surgery to repair a broken pelvis, several painstaking months of physical therapy, and to pass the physical fitness test before you could go back to the team. Although your broken bones had been fixed, your doctor diagnosed you with arthritis, making almost every day a living hell. When you got the all clear to come back to the team, you did, for about a month, but the whole time you felt like such a burden. 

“I can’t do this, Jay,” You cried in the locker room, him kneeling in front of you, “I can’t run as fast as I used to, or jump things, or fuck, it even hurts to sit in a car on long surveillance. I can’t do this anymore.” 

“It’s okay,” Jay said, rubbing your knee, “I’m going to take care of you. We’re going to be okay.” 

Jay kept his promise to take care of you, moving you into his house almost as soon as possible. The two of you hadn’t really defined your relationship at that point, but you knew he was yours and you were his. Hank still had you somewhat a part of the intelligence unit, working more inside the house than out. It was easier for you, the days when your pain was really bad, you got to stay home and work from home. 

You knew that you were going to wake up in pain the next day. It was supposed to be an easy gym set, just some light leg work followed by a thirty minute walk on the treadmill. Usually, it wasn't an issue, you would wake up feeling that good type of muscle soreness. But the shift from warm late summer weather to the cooler fall weather had your bones feeling brittle.

You could hardly get out of bed, your knees and hips aching, your spine feeling like cement had been poured down it. It took you nearly ten minutes to pull yourself to your feet, and it felt like pins and needles. Tears filled your eyes as you shuffled your way to the bathroom to do your morning routine. You bit back a cry as you lowered yourself down to the toilet. 

Ever since your diagnosis, Jay has done all he physically could do to help you. He read nearly every article he could get his hands on, wrote down all the recipes he could find, googled all the best treatment options there were. On the days the pain was really bad, Jay would help you inject cortisone into your joints, hoping to help relax them and lessen the pain. He hated watching you like this. He hated that your careers, which had started together, had gone in such totally different ways. 

You let out a shaky breath as you tried to reach for the ginger tea on the shelf. You had already planned to take some Tylenol, and curl up with your heating pad. You texted your physical therapist and sadly she couldn't get you in for acupuncture. 

Your whole body felt weak as you picked up the tea kettle and poured the hot water into your mug. You very slowly walked to the couch, holding your mug tightly in your hands, worried that your hands could give out at any moment and send scalding water to the ground. You gently eased yourself down on the couch, letting out a groan as your body sunk into the soft cushions.

You weren't sure when you fell asleep, but you woke up to Jay's worried face in front of you, gently running his hand over your cheek. "Jay?" Your head was pounding as you looked up at him, the lamb behind his head making it look like a halo around him, "What are you-"

“You haven’t been answering your phone,” He said, “Hailey said that you canceled your lunch plans and then quit answering. I got worried.”

You nodded, “I just. . . hurt.” 

Jay’s eyes filled with hurt at your slurred voice, knowing that the pain is damn near unbearable if you canceled your plans with Hailey, “Show me where it hurts.” You closed your eyes as the tears started to fall down your face, “You should’ve called me.” 

“The case is important,” You sniffled, not wanting to look up at him. 

“You are important,” Jay said, bending down to place a soft kiss on the crown of your head, “How about a bath and a massage?” You nodded, "Alright. I'm gonna help you sit up." You nodded again as Jake put his strong arms under your back and arms, moving your body from a laying down position to a sitting one. You let out a cry and Jake pressed his lips to your forehead, "I know, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." 

“It’s okay,” You sniffled, taking in a short breath. Just that small movement sent a wave of pain and had stars dancing in your vision. It wouldn’t be the first time that you have lost consciousness from Jay trying to help you. The pain gets to be too much that your body just shuts down. You gripped Jay’s shirt tightly in your hands, willing the all too familiar feeling of bile rising in your throat to go away. 

“Do we need to go to Med?” Jay whispered. You hated having to go to Med when the pain got bad. You did everything in your power to stay away from taking heavy pain pills and going to the doctor for treatment. 

You let out a slow breath, “No. Just move slowly. Please,” Your voice cracked. 

Jay nodded his head, letting you sit up for just another moment, before sliding his arms under your legs and around your back. Another cry left your lips as Jay lifted you up and began walking to your bedroom. He hated causing you more pain, but knew that this was going to be the best place for you to get some reprieve. 

"I'll go draw your bath and change," Jay said, setting you down on the vanity chair. He moved around the room quickly, drawing your bath and adding some drops of essential oils in, as you tried to strip from your clothing. You tried to lift your shirt over your head, but even that caused you to cry out in pain. 

Jay stopped what he was doing and ran to you, "Hey, let me help you."

"I can do this," You shook your head and Jay nodded. He had learned one thing over the years that you still wanted to do as many things as you could despite the pain. When you were fully naked, Jay helped you to your feet as you walked towards the bathroom. You could smell the lavender and rosemary oils. You gripped Jay's hands tightly as you stepped into the bathtub and he helped you gently lower yourself into the hot water.

Jay sat on the other side of the bathtub on the ground, and watched you. You let out a sigh as you settled into the water, feeling the ache in your joints go from a nine to at least a five. Everything still hurt but it was a bit more manageable.

“I’m still going to call Will and have him come see you tomorrow,” Jay said, grabbing a washcloth, soaking it in the bath and then gently rubbing it across your back and down your shoulders. “You can tell him to fuck off when he gets here, but he’s coming over.” 

A small chuckle left your mouth, “Okay.” You knew there was no arguing with him on that one. You were surprised that Jay hasn’t already invited Will over to come take a look at you. 

"Do you want to ice down after this?" Jay asked, gently moving his hand in the water.

"No. Just put the lotion in the fridge," You said and Jay nodded, "You already did, didn't you?"

He smiled, "Yeah, I did," He sat up on his knees and leaned in to kiss your forehead, "I rewarmed your tea and got you some more Tylenol. Your physical therapist said she can get you in tomorrow morning. I already got tomorrow cleared so I can take you."

"Jay-"

"In sickness and in health," Jay said, and caressed your cheek, "I made a promise. And I mean it." You nodded and Jay placed yet another kiss on your forehead, making you smile.