#part 4 Maybe It's You
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ok everybody block dnp on all socials they have eyes everywhere. they know way too much. those omniscient fuckers are always watching. no one is safe.
like what do you MEAN you know about those stupid “real voice” compilations and people absolutely clowning about jumpcuts and smudged whiskers and what do you MEAN you’re aware of those 2009 phan theories people still debate to this day? what happened to “i don’t check my indirects” “i don’t go on the tags”?? i bet you’re lurking RIGHT NOW reading this very post. all men do is lie. can’t trust anyone 😤😪
#/j#dnp#dan and phil#pinof#phan#gamingmas 2023#yeet my deet#dan howell#daniel howell#amazingphil#phil lester#danisnotonfire#i didn’t participate in the phandom until they came out#i was an older phannie i started watching at age 16#so i knew better#so this feels like i’m being punished for something i didn’t do#and having always been mortified and embarrassed by the shit yall would say back in the day#my only respite was “ok maybe dnp didn’t see this”#no they’ve seen EVERYTHING#you’re past is coming back to haunt you but your past is also coming back to haunt me lmao#to be clear i am part of the problem simply for consuming phan/phandom media at the time and therefore giving those videos views#but i was always terrified of the phandom#like i didn’t even consider myself part of the phandom for my first 4 years as a phannie#i was a closet demon phannie lol#i started participating after they came out and we were all actual adults about it and super respectful#i was like we’re all old and gay now i love this for us#yeet my deenp#bog
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Part 3 of thinking about the reaction another universe's Logan would have to meeting Wade. To Wade and Logan's relationship.
Part 1, Part 2, Part 4
---
Logan hadn't left Wade's side since he got here. Eventually, Wade managed to convince him to calm down enough that he could briefly explain to the X-men that this was his Logan, the one from his universe, who came looking for him.
His Logan hovered close to him, practically plastered to his side as if he'd disappear the second he took his eyes off him. Other-Logan was nowhere to be seen.
Eventually, they returned to Wade's room for the night. The X-men offered Logan a room of his own, but he point-blank refused.
When Wade crawled into the twin-sized bed (which definitely wasn't big enough to comfortably fit two people), Logan slipped under the covers behind him. Logan pressed his nose to Wade's neck and released a shaky breath of relief.
He could finally relax now that he was alone, away from the probing crowd that reminded him too much of memories he'd rather leave in the past. Now that he could focus on Wade. His scent, the steady rhythm of his heartbeat, and the sound of his breathing.
The exhaustion hit Logan like a truck. He'd barely gotten any sleep in the past month Wade's been missing, and when he did it was fitful and left him feeling inexplicably more tired when he awoke. He didn't realize how much he depended on the comfort of Wade's presence to sleep until it was gone.
(When he was alone, it reminded him of being back in his universe. Of waking up in the middle of the night, claws unsheathed, breathing wildly. Of realizing he was completely alone, that everyone he cared about was dead. Of popping open a bottle of liquor just to silence the noise of his own thoughts.)
Wade reminded him that he was in a new universe, now. That he wasn't alone. Logan wrapped his arms around him, securely (tight enough to not let him escape) and finally, finally, let himself breathe.
Wade hummed, content at feeling the hot breath of Logan on his neck as he drifted off to sleep. For the first time in a month, he felt warm. He felt safe. He felt comforted, knowing that Logan was here with him. Apparently having a life-sized human heater spoiled him and made it difficult to stomach sleeping alone.
They both fell asleep, comforted by the familiarity of each other's presence.
(It was the best sleep either of them had in weeks.)
---
The aftermath was just a little bit awkward.
Logan hardly left his side, warily glaring at anyone who came to disturb their peace as they went about their day. He seemed to still be on edge around the other X-men (and anyone who wasn't Wade in general).
Wade was sure it would be difficult for him to interact with them, too, if he'd seen and come to terms with all of their deaths. Of being responsible for the downfall of an alternate version of them. It must be jarring to see them alive and well, to see a distortion of the future he could've had with caricatures of his friends.
(It made Wade a little anxious to think that Logan was remembering it all. Reminiscing on a better time before Wade came and took him away from his world.)
Despite the companionship they'd built, Other-Logan had been making himself scarce. Wade was a little concerned about him, but he was more focused on his own version, who'd been acting as his own personal guard dog. (If a guard dog was 300 pounds and a fully grown man.)
Still, sometimes when they passed by each other, he swore he saw that same look in Other-Logan's eyes. The one he still had difficulty deciphering, but recognized as meaningful.
The one his Logan had in the first few weeks of living together. After they'd saved the world. (Maybe even before it.)
(He tried not to think too hard about it.)
The other X-men were just dancing around them. They seemed to be unsure of how to interact with a Logan so similar and yet so completely different from their own. The only member of the X-men who knew about this Logan's backstory was Wolverine and... let's just say it wasn't getting out anytime soon.
It was almost funny to watch their attempts to start a conversation with Logan only to be met with short, one-word responses. Almost. (It wasn't funny to feel how Logan tensed up next to him, how he smoothed over his expression and put himself on guard. To see the slight trembling of his clenched fists. To see the haunted looks in his eyes.)
And so they ended up accidentally (or purposefully, on Logan's part) avoiding everyone for the first few days.
Wade hadn't gone out on any missions in that time. Logan didn't seem like he was in any mood to go out with the others, and, quite frankly, neither was Wade. He didn't realize how much he missed Logan until he was here.
(And a part of him was relieved that Logan was choosing to stay with him. That he clung to him tightly and didn't seem to be tempted to go rubbing elbows with the other X-men anytime soon.)
He'd managed to fill Logan in after they first crashed from exhaustion together. Logan seemed equal parts concerned and relieved to find out that he'd been stranded because his device was broken. (Because that meant Wade wasn't kidnapped or in danger. Because that meant Wade didn't want to leave him behind.)
They'd been sleeping in the same bed ever since. Anytime the X-men brought up moving Logan to another room, a nicer one with a bigger bed, he just growled and muttered that he didn't need it. One time, they'd offered to move another twin-sized bed into Wade's room so that they could at least have their own place to sleep, but Logan gruffly and very quickly turned that down too.
They hadn't tried to separate them since.
Even when Charles Xavier himself called Logan into his office the morning after he arrived, Logan didn't seem to consider leaving Wade behind as an option. And so they'd both stumbled into the office, suspiciously pressed close together, to report Logan's arrival.
Not that Wade was complaining. He'd offer to be Wolvie's emotional support teddy bear any day. (Even if he got dragged around roughly like a toddler who didn't learn to play nice with or share their toys yet.)
Charles had looked at them oddly, a mix of what could only be described as surprise and then understanding crossing over his face. He didn't comment on Wade's presence, nor Logan's insistence to keep him close by.
(He'd pulled aside the other X-men shortly after and told them to not bother this Logan too much. That he'd been through things their Logan hadn't and that he wouldn't be very receptive to their presence. To not comment on his relationship with Wade and to let them be.)
(It had aroused a mixture of confusion and suspicion among the X-men. Scott and Jean exchanged concerned glances with each other. What could cause Logan to want to avoid them, even in another universe? What did Logan go through to be so wary of them? To rely on Deadpool, of all people, for emotional support?)
(And why was their Logan influenced as well?)
After that, things had gone fairly smoothly. Wade occasionally still annoyed Colossus, who'd begun to reluctantly accept his presence (and who Logan was the least on guard around, out of all of the X-men). It drew skeptical glances from the other X-men, who were surely wondering what reason Wade had to be bothering Colossus, of all people.
But other than that, they mainly kept to themselves.
Until today, that is.
Today, the other X-men had finally managed to find a lead on the man who'd KO'd Wolverine and Deadpool, shattering Wade's pathway back to his own universe. Apparently, he'd set up a new base, this time with better-equipped personnel.
Seemed the asshole wasn't working alone. Of fucking course. When Wade wanted a fight all he could find were pussies, but It couldn't ever be easy when Wade actually wanted to go home. Just his luck.
It was large-scale enough that the majority of the X-men were preparing to go on the raid. Not a good sign.
Of course, Wade had saddled in and prepared to go the second they said they had a lead. And of course, by default, that meant Logan was coming with him.
They'd both rested enough, and while they were slightly on edge, Wade doubted that was going to go away anytime soon until they got back to their own universe. It'd be better to just rip the bandaid off and get this shit over with so that they could curl up on their shitty pull-out couch and eat leftovers and let themselves decompress from whatever the fuck this mission was turning into.
After a quick debrief in which they essentially went over everyone's roles and the layout of the base (or what they knew of it, at least) they set off.
Logan and Wade were paired together, luckily (well, most likely intentionally from the sharp glare Logan shot everyone when they began discussing their roles). They were tasked with clearing out the enemies and working their way to the main base, which was unsurprising given their tank-like abilities and healing factors.
Wade stared out the window for most of the ride there (and Logan stared at Wade) and before he knew it, they'd arrived.
And wow. The villains had really outdone themselves in the cliche base department. If the abandoned nuclear power plant was basic, the shady abandoned military facility was the equivalent of a white girl who liked Starbucks and listened to Taylor Swift. Completely predictable and not at all original.
They all split off into smaller, individual teams and, after a quick confirmation, they went in.
The henchmen this time were vaguely impressive. Well, impressive in the sense the typical office worker was impressive compared to a 10-year-old. It actually took more than 5 seconds for Logan and Wade to clear out the first wave.
But a run-of-the-mill decent group of villains was no match for Wade and Logan's teamwork. If Other-Wolverine and Deadpool worked like a well-oiled machine, this Deadpool and Wolverine worked like they were fucking telepaths. Completely in sync, predicting each other's attack patterns and weaving in and out like they shared a set of strings puppeteering them.
(It caused a few of the X-men to stop and stare to watch. It was brutal and grotesque and... beautiful, in way, to see how quickly they plowed through the villains. The X-men knew teamwork—they were accustomed to it, with the whole superhero team shtick—but not this type of partnership. This type of innate, primal fluidity that allowed them to move as one.)
Before long, with a suprising lack of resistance, given this was supposed to be The Villain Base (although, to be fair, they did have the X-men playing cleanup crew around them and taking care of the rest), they finally made their way into what could only be reffered to as some sort of fucked-up evil lab.
The walls were lined with shady medical equipment and some type of alien technology, and, to no one's surprise, the same fucker as last time was standing in the center.
"Nice to see you again, Deadpool," he nodded. "And... nice to meet you, Wolverine."
OK, hold on a second. He thought it was weird that this guy knew his name the first time considering he was, y'know, new around these parts, but he'd brushed it off. Maybe there was an alternate version of him running around (even if he hadn't heard of one despite interrogating an absurd number of people connected to the underground). But to know that this was an alternate version of Wolverine, just upon seeing him?
It's like the asshole predicted their arrival in this dimension.
Wade tensed slightly, and judging by a glance at Logan next to him, he'd picked up on that discrepancy too.
"Hey, Cable 2.0. Or should I call you Evil Cable? Cable the destroyer? Actually, calling you Cable would be an insult to his brand. How about generic futuristic villain #46," Wade quipped, trying to steel his nerves and school his expression back into a grin.
"I assure you, I'm nothing like this Cable you speak of," the man replied, calmly, "If he were similar to me, you wouldn't be standing here right now."
"Oooooh, scary, I think I almost pissed my pants! Quick, Wolvie, hide me, I'm quivering in my boots!" Wade ducked behind Logan, voice rising high from mock-fear. Logan merely grunted, but allowed him to hide behind him for the bit. (See, even Logan must agree he's funny if he's playing along.)
The man blinks at them, clearly unimpressed, before raising his gun. Okay, so they're getting right into it. Fun.
Logan unsheathed his claws and Wade gripped his guns tightly.
And then the fight behind.
This Logan and Wade had better teamwork compared to the last encounter. Their teamwork was down to a science, or a particularly bloody work of art.
Unfortunately, this time, their opponent knew their attack patterns. He was deflecting their attacks with ease, using minimal effort to dodge even while they ganged up on him.
This went on for a few moments, making barely any progress aside from wasting time. Until, a growl was heard from behind them—
—and another Wolverine joined the mix.
"I can you're struggling a bit, bub, let me help you out," he grunted, slashing at the villain.
"Awww! I'd be swooning right now if not for the fact it'd get me killed!" Wade chirped back, dodging a bullet that shot his way.
His Logan growled slightly and landed next to him, before murmuring, "Focus on the fight. Stop getting distracted."
Wade pouted in response but followed dutifully to attack the villain with Logan.
Their group teamwork was actually fairly impressive, in Wade's opinion. Which wasn't surprising, given that two of the members had near-identical fighting styles and both were used to working with him.
The two Wolverines clashed a bit at first, aiming for the same spots and directing annoyed growls at each other. But after Wade finally made them calm down ("Woah woah woah, ladies, there's enough hits to go around! This isn't Fortnite, you aren't going for the Battle Royale. Let's all work together, yeah?") they fell into a better rhythm.
They were holding up fairly well, even managing to make leeway and push the man back. They were on the winning side of the fight (which they better be on, with Deadpool and two fucking Wolverines trying to kill him). "Were" being the key word.
Because, right as they seemed to be tiring out the asshole, he pulled a move nobody expected. He leaped back, suddenly, creating distance, and grabbed a suspicious-looking metal device from the table.
All three of them exchanged glances and seemed to be on the same page: Do Not Let The Fucker Use It, Whatever It Is.
And so they all leaped at once, claws and guns and knives blazing, until the man sidestepped and with a clink had attached the device to Wolverine's neck. To his Logan's neck.
It folded out into a sickeningly familiar shape.
Fuck.
Logan's claws retracted and a panicked look flashed in his eyes despite his angry posture.
It was an ability-restricting collar.
And Wade had a feeling it wouldn't be as easy as punching in the code "7" to get it off, considering the futuristic, sturdy, and significantly more complicated-looking design.
The man picked Logan up by the back of the neck of his suit with an inhuman strength (had he been holding back, before?) and Wade saw fucking red.
Before he could think, he was unloading a full magazine into the man's chest and head. But the bullet wounds just closed up and the shells fell to the ground uselessly.
He saw the fear in Logan's eyes. At being powerless.
A reflection of how Wade felt, strapped to that table. Tortured. (Francis' voice rang in his ears. "What's my name?")
Wade lunged, trying to dig his katanas into the man's side. He dodged, stepped to the side, and blocked as Wade desperately, frantically tried to injure him. Just enough to let Logan go.
"Get your filthy hands off of him, you son of a bitch, or I swear to God I will tear you limb from limb like a 5 year old's shitty Barbie doll!" Wade snarled, a venom in his voice that made Logan's eyes widen from in his hold.
(A venom that made the Logan behind him look astonished, too. It'd always been him as the protector, the stronger one. He always had to carry the burden of worry, of solving the problem. And yet, here was a version of him with someone to do the same for him. Someone who would go to hell and back for him in the same way he had to, countless times.)
(That familiar ache was back.)
"I don't think I will," the man hummed, side-stepping yet another attack. "As a matter of fact, I'm getting quite bored of this back-and-forth."
Suddenly, the man held up a knife (where did that come from?) to Logan's throat. Logan, who didn't have his healing factor right now. Logan, who was just as vulnerable as any other human right now.
(Logan, who was looking at him with terror in his eyes. Logan, who had wanted death for so long, pressing himself against the barrel of his gun and fucking laughing the first time they'd met. Logan, who, through all the blood and sweat and tears and sacritice, had finally found a reason to live again. Logan, who didn't want to die anymore. Who wanted to live with Wade.)
It was like the world stopped turning. It was the same feeling Wade had felt the night Vanessa died, all noises drowned out and all colors and shapes blurring together and ohgodohgodohgod she's dead she's gone it's all my fault I never should've met her to begin with— but this was worse, somehow. It didn't just feel like the rug had been pulled out from underneath his feet, it felt like the entire fucking ground crumbled apart, collapsing in on itself, leaving him tumbling closer and closer to Earth's core until he's burned alive and swallowed whole. It felt like drowning and suffocating and burning alive all at once. It felt like losing his very foundation, the one thing he allowed himself to cling on to, thinking he'd never have to say goodbye. It felt like all his worst fears and nightmares came true in the worst possible way.
It felt like dying.
"Now," the man started, not giving a damn about Wade's internal panic and the incessant ringing in his ears, "We can do this the easy way or the hard way."
Why was Other-Logan just standing there? Why wasn't anyone moving? Why was nothing happening? How could the world keep spinning when it felt like his world was in limbo right now, powerless and dangled between the claws of a monster, threatening to drop him into its maw?
"You can let me go with your buddy right here, or I kill him now and you never see him again. Understood?" the man tightened his grip around Logan's throat, who began hacking slightly. The knife nicked his skin slightly, creating a trail of red down his neck. Logan hissed in pain.
Wade wanted nothing more than to tear his fucking throat out in response.
But he clenched his fists instead, feeling his blunt nails dig into his skin even through the suit.
"Wade, just let me go, you can come get me later, yeah?" Logan wheezed, barely able to speak around the constricting grip.
"But—he could—Logan, no, I can fight him, I can, I won't let you sacrifice yourself again," Wade fumbled over his words, unable to focus on anything but Logan Logan Logan.
"I'm not sacrificin' myself, just," his voice was rough and heavy, "let me go. You can't win, Wade. I'm not going to watch you die trying to save me."
"But—"
"You heard him," the Wolverine behind him suddenly spoke, putting a hand on his shoulder. (Wade wanted to rip it off. It was wrong wrong wrong, so similar and yet too different from his Logan. His Logan, who had deeper callouses. His Logan, whose hands were rougher and gripped him firmly.) "He'll kill him if we fail to fight him now."
Why was everybody else okay with this? Why did everyone else seem so calm when it felt like Wade's world was imploding, his vision was narrowing, and his senses were going haywire?
(Logan could get hurt. Seriously. Not just superficially. He could be tortured like he was. Wade didn't like knowing Logan was in pain, even with his healing factor, but without it? He could be killed. Even if the man kept his promise right now, who's to say it holds up in an hour? A day? A week? Wade couldn't even comprehend living that long without knowing if Logan was dead or alive. Logan could die and he wouldn't know, because he'd be outside of his reach.)
Wade caught Logan's eyes.
Fuck.
He was scared too, Wade could tell, but putting on a brave face for him. Trying to calm Wade down, when Logan was the one getting kidnapped. He was fucking pathetic. (It really was God's Greatest Joke that he couldn't die, huh?)
Wolverine tensed beside him, ready to hold him back if needed. Wade bit his lip until it fucking bled and finally managed to mumble, "Fine."
"What was that?" the man gloated.
"Fine," Wade hissed. "But I'll be back to get him, and I swear to fucking God, if a single hair on his head is out of place, I'll eviscerate you. I'll make sure you wish you didn't have a healing factor, because I'll torture you until you're begging to die. And then finally, I'll snap that shitty collar onto your neck and kill you in the most painful way possible.
The man seemed unphased. But it was a promise. A promise Wade would keep even if his life depended on it. Even if he had to drag himself out of his own grave, regenerate his limbs from scratch, claw his way out of hell, he would make him suffer if he did anything to Logan.
Logan's eyes widened from in the man's grasp. Wade looked at him, a dark expression on his face. Letting him know how serious he was. (That Wade would do anything for him, to keep him safe. To keep him by his side. That if he got hurt, he'd murder every fucking person involved.)
Logan's eyes shone with realization, a vague spark of hope. It made Wade all the more desperate to save him, to live up to those expectations.
"Well, I hate to interrupt the moment, but I really must be going," the man commented.
It took all of Wade's willpower not to lunge at him. Not to attack him as he picked up a suitcase and walked away, yanking Logan alongside him by the back of his neck.
Logan's haunted yet trusting (despite it all, he had faith in Wade, even when he let him get hurt in the first place) eyes were the last thing Wade saw before they dissapeared.
Wade wanted to go after them, to chase them, but he knew better. The other X-men weren't here right now. If all three of them barely managed to hold up against this man, how would the remaining two beat him? And who knew whatever other tricks were up his sleeves.
He was unpredictable. He was dangerous.
Wade knew this, but—
He should've been faster. He should've taken the hit instead of Logan (even if it seemed the man was targeting him to begin with). He should've been better, should've been stronger. Should've prevented Logan from being taken in the first place.
His knees buckled underneath him and he collapsed to the floor. The Other Wolverine startled behind him, dropping to the floor with him and wrapping his arm around Wade for support.
Wade felt the same, desolate, useless feeling wash over him that he had when he'd cradled Vanessa's dead body. He'd failed. Again. He had so much time to learn and do better and yet he still failed. It was all his fault. Everything was his fault.
He should've just brought Logan with him to begin with. Should've swallowed his fears and sucked it up, even if Logan did want to leave him. Logan was a grown man, he could make his own choices. He could realize that his current life, his life with Wade, wasn't worth it if he wanted. He could abandon him and Wade would have no fucking ground to stand on to stop him.
And yet Wade couldn't just fucking swallow his pride and had to behave like a jealous teenager.
(Would it be any different, if they came here together? If they were on the same page from the start, had time to plan and learn together? The man was so fucking strong that even if they had time, Wade was unsure if they'd beat him alone. Maybe they were predestined to fail. All because of Wade's incompetence.)
"Hey," Other-Logan started to speak in a low, worried tone, "We'll get him back. I promise."
He had a concerned and vaguely unsure look on his face, clearly unused to trying to comfort someone. Here's another Logan, comforting Wade when his feelings shouldn't even be a priority to begin with.
"It's my fault," Wade muttered.
"What?"
"It's my fucking fault. Everything is my fault. I should've gotten kidnapped instead. At least if he took me, I could take it."
"Wade—"
"I mean, it's no big deal if I get tortured. I'm used to it. At least I'd fucking deserve it for the stupidity of getting my communication device broken. At least then I'd be the only one hurt, and it's not like I matter anyway."
"Wade, what are you—"
Wade continued to ramble on, frantically, tears collecting in his eyes and threatening to fall down his face, "It should've been me. Logan is a fucking hero, he has a place in the world. He shouldn't be hurt just because of my mistake. I dragged him into this shit, into my universe, and how do I repay him? By letting him get fucking kidnapped and tortured on my behalf!" Wade had to physically force himself to not devolve into full-body sobs at this point, trembling underneath Logan's hand on his shoulde. Rocking back and forth like a lunatic.
"Wade, just listen for one fucking sec—"
"I should've just killed myself. I should've sacrified myself to destroy the Time Ripper, should've been strong enough to grab both the matter anti-matter channels and dissapeared from existence. At least it'd only be me who's gone, and Logan would still be safe. I never should've dragged him into my shit, I should've been long dead before I even met him. I should've had the balls to snap that collar on my neck and explode myself for real—"
—Slap.
Logan had honest to god slapped him. Hard.
Wade snapped out of his rant, holding his cheek as a deep purple bruise formed. He started hollowly back at Logan.
"Shut the fuck up," Other-Logan growled. "Don't speak about yourself like that. You don't deserve to die. It wasn't your fault, you fucking know that. We all were there, so it's as much on us as it was you. None of us could've seen it coming."
"Rich, coming from you, Mr. Blame Himself in the flesh," Wade retorted, scrambling for any kind of purchase in the conversation.
"I know what you're trying to do. You're trying to make me pissed off enough to let it go. But I won't." Logan took a deep breath, running a frustrated hand through his hair. He finally seemed to collect himself and looked at Wade, his gaze piercing and sharp. "Look, you... you're not worthless. Hell, you're the furthest thing from it. When I'm around you, it feels like I'm actually a person for the first time I can remember. It's like I can finally fucking breathe. And if that's how I feel, when I've known you for just a month, I imagine it's even stronger in your Logan."
Wade started to protest, but Logan cut him off. "None of that, bub. You know I'm right. You can't honestly be that fucking blind to not see the impact you have on him. On me. ...Look, when you've been alive as long as I have, it's inevtiable that you feel lonely. Of fucking course it is, when everyone around you dies and you're the only one left standing." Wade stares at him wordlessly, a hint of understanding in his eyes.
"...But you make it better," Logan settles on. "Do you see the way he looks at you? Like if you're gone, nothing matters? That isn't the look of someone who hates you. I don't, and he sure as hell doesn't. So stop putting yourself down when you fucking know he wouldn't want you blaming youself. You wouldn't blame him if you got captured, would you?"
"...No, but that's—"
"—The exact same scenario. But you're too stuck in your head to realize it." Logan groaned, seemingly lost for words to say. "Look, I'm not the best at this. At saying what I'm feeling. You know this. But what I do say, I mean. And I mean it when I say that it isn't your fault and he'd never blame you. I wouldn't. You shouldn't either."
Wade looked at him, at his sincerity, and for some reason he felt more like sobbing than he did before.
"So let's get him back, yeah?" Other-Logan asked, gruff and hesitant. It felt like a peace offering. An olive branch.
"...Yeah," Wade murmured, and let his body weight fall against Logan, who was beside him now. Logan wrapped an arm around him, hesitantly at first, and then more securely when Wade leaned into it.
Wade curled into him, thoughts running a million miles a minute.
(Where was Logan right now? How far had they gotten? What if he was hurt? What if he was writhing in pain, calling out for Wade, and he wasn't ther? What if he was tortured? What if he was dead?)
(...No, Wade wouldn't let himself imagine the worst-case scenario. Of never seeing Logan again. He wouldn't accept that reality. He couldn't. Didn't know to live, anymore, in a world without him. He'd once tore through different universes and escaped the void, all to save his family. He'd do it again in a heartbeat.)
(He'd get Logan back no matter what.)
#deadclaws#deadpool 3#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool movie#logan howlett#poolverine#wade wilson#wade x logan#wade/logan#poolverine angst#kitkat#angst#sorry guys this took a bit longer than i thought#BUT PART 3 IS HERE#i honestly didnt know it would take this long to get the story where i wanted#so#part 4???#maybe they'll actually get a good ending this time guys#let me know what you think of this chapter#it was the angstiest ive done so far#pretty proud of it ngl
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Enstars sure is an experience. Did I miss anything?
#are you guys all okay? i definitely am not okay#this is not the type of media that i usually go for yet it is EXACTLY the type of media that i would like#so many gaps so many stories WAY TOO MUCH READING I DONT HAVE THE TIME#i know i missed a lot because ive only watched the anime and read the main music story up to ch 4 of the second part#and i have read some events stories that were free#and maybe one or two outside from translations#but like thats it#this is like reading orv and getting hit with its deep metas on human life and the importance of stories#but instead im being clobbered by the most deranged storylines known to man (and again. i read ORV and am a bsd fan)#this isnt fantasy but there is nothing realistic about enstars and i unfortunately am attached#every day i spiral into east asian media that gives me an aneurysm#bsd -> orv -> link click -> enstars....i wanna say they keep getting more unhinged but theyre all unhinged in different ways#anyway please help me....#enstars#ensemble stars#fandom spamdom#stuff i say#i will admit i am mostly into the game for the stories#a consistent gamer i am not#but to unlock the stories ill push back the animes i have to catch up on etc etc#again. please help me....#edit: updated to remove queerbaiting because apparently i dont know whats going on
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The Boys subreddit’s and fandom-at-large’s widespread expectation that a child should be enthusiastic about killing his father
— I don’t care what his father has done —
— especially when said father clearly cares about the child and the child doesn’t have better parental figures alive —
— I don’t care if the love is ‘narcissistic’—
(— give me a break all parental love has an element of self-love, especially when it comes to, but not limited to, biological children—)
— especially when he had about 30 seconds to process a huge infodump about why his dad sucks before he’d be gassed if he didn’t pledge allegiance—
makes me feel like I’m taking crazy pills.
#are we watching the same show#sure the writing is confused#but not confused about THAT part- not really#Becca didn’t raise him to think like that no matter what she thought of HL#as she shouldn’t have#mallory: let’s prevent HL by making you into a patricidal child soldier at 12#maybe that speech didn’t deserve the death penalty but it was unsettling#mallory and butcher are not good people <- glad this needs to be spelled out#i love writing parenthetically don’t judge me#ryan butcher#homelander#the boys season 4#the boys#the boys tv
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some stuff picked out from my tgaa sketch dump :) figuring out some faces,, memes,,, stuff based off of dialogue,,, exactly one sad,, gays,,,
#these r all wildly out of order lmaoo#ryuu ass up is the ghost trick meme... literally him chapter 5 investigation part 4#boscombe valley one is the “i am become kirby” bdg quote from the kirby unraveled..#my art#doodle#the great ace attorney#tgaa#dai gyakuten saiban#dgs#ryunosuke naruhodo#susato mikotoba#kazuma asogi#herlock sholmes#iris wilson#gina lestrade#barok van zieks#van zieks with long bottom lashes changing my life ngl#anyways do you think kazuma ever just leaned against the wardrobe and dozed off like that. do you think that maybe the two of them ever sta#yed up talking late into the night. do you think that ryuu ever thought about maybe climbing outta the wardrobe to sleep in the bed#these two rlly forced themselves into a “oh no theres only one bed” situation but then had ryuu sleep and live in a wardrobe#what the fuck are locks for 🙄 is there a reason why they wouldnt just lock the door whenever ryuu had to get outta there.. and like. it wou#ldnt even be weird during night right??? idk man..#shit iforgor to tag them#asoryuu#the almost kiss asoryuu means a lot to me pls appreciate them
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What would you choose? :0c
(note: original image is from HERE (link) - but I edited it to add a wider variety of options.. also added $3 extra to the total, even though I know that makes it more uneven lol, I thought if you're adding 10 whole extra items, the money to spend should at least be increased slightly, if that makes sense..)
#I would get orange juice. black coffee. AND iced coffee ($3) because I love the variety of having multiple drinks#then sausage and scrambled eggs ($8). Then sauteed mushrooms ($3)....AND... hrm.. then spending the remaining $4 would be hard#I wish I could get waffles (as they are my favorite and are superior in every way compared to pancakes. donuts. etc.) but I'm not willing#to give up the other savory things just to get them. so... then maybe I could get a biscuit or english muffin? and just put jam or#honey butter or something on it so it can be my replacement 'sweet and bready' thing instead of something from the $5 row??#OR I could also just assume that having the orange juice plus iced coffee would provide enough of a 'sweet element' to the meal#(since I largely prefer savory foods. I only like a tiny bit of sweet added for variety) and thus forego any sort of#'bready' thing entirely and just get the bowl of beans/onion/tomato (I'd leave the avocado since I don't like the#texture of them really lol). THEN I'd have $1 left to get the milk or the black tea... increasing my total of random drinks..#which is always the goal of course.. as a chronic ''person who is sipping at 5 different drinks at their desk simultaneously always'' perso#OR... I could just do.. waffle. scrambled eggs. sausage. mushrooms. and black coffee and orange juice.. which is... okay variety#augh... so difficult.. As my Ideal Breakfast is like a buffet type thing or something where you have like 25 different things to choose fro#and can get a little tiny bit of everything. My eating style is very much like.. I'd rather pick at a small amount of a ton of#different things than just have a very large amount of only one or two things. Thats why I LOVE sample platter type stuff.#So it's like... augh... the ideal option would be a tiny portion of EVERYTHING actually lol...#Difficult to choose...#ANYWAY.. Also no idea why I added croissant instead of bagel. I only thought about that afterwards. I do actually like bagels.#I've only ever even had a croissant like 2 times in my entire life. Yet I've had many bagels. For some reason it stuck out in my mind more#when I was considering 'essential breakfast foods' somehow... how could I forget them... bagels my beloved...#Blame it on the hot weather... 'What in the blazes? The sun hath obliterated the concept of bagels from my miind!'#(< meant to be said in a silly overdramatic elderly wizard accent or something)#Also I don't think ''bowl of beans. onion. avocado. and tomatos.'' is necessarily a breakfast classic or something gbhjjh#but I was just trying to think of a versatile vegetable-ish side that could be full of common breakfast additions#so people could do stuff like ''oh I get the toast option and then the bowl of stuff and I put the avocado on the toast'' etc.#Like a mix and match. You could mix ingredients from different parts. You could put scrambled eggs and bacon and onion#on the bread or soemthing. etc. I just feel like something is always missing if a Full Breakfast Spread#doesnt have some sort of onions or beans or mushrooms or asparagus or spinach like... some sort of thing that isn't just eggs and meat and#bread.. you know? lol..#But then again.. I am the Sampling Plate Style Variety Lover and Tiny Portion Of Food Picker so maybe thats just a me thing.
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Dragon Age: The Veilguard Steam "About This Game" section -
"Enter the world of Thedas, a vibrant land of rugged wilderness, treacherous labyrinths, and glittering cities – steeped in conflict and secret magics. Now, a pair of corrupt ancient gods have broken free from centuries of darkness and are hellbent on destroying the world. Thedas needs someone they can count on. Rise as Rook, Dragon Age’s newest hero. Be who you want to be and play how you want to play as you fight to stop the gods from blighting the world. But you can’t do this alone – the odds are stacked against you. Lead a team of seven companions, each with their own rich story to discover and shape, and together you will become The Veilguard. Rally the Veilguard and defy the gods in Dragon Age™: The Veilguard, an immersive single-player RPG where you become the leader others believe in."
"UNITE A BATTERED WORLD Enter Thedas, a vibrant world of rugged wilderness, treacherous labyrinths, and glittering cities. The world is teetering on a knife’s edge while corrupt gods unleash havoc across the continent. Nations war, and factions splinter. Who will you trust? From the Arlathan Forest to the back alleys of Minrathous, this is a broken world. Your actions will affect the fate of Thedas forever. - Dramatic Single-Player Campaign — When corrupt Elven Gods threaten Thedas, lead the charge to save it. Rook isn’t afraid of a fight, no matter the odds. No matter the cost. - Vibrant & Diverse Environments — Enter a vivid fantasy world, and experience imaginative new locations as well as some you’ve heard of but never seen. - Larger-than-life Foes — Battle darkspawn, demons from beyond the Veil, dragons that rule the skies, and unique enemies as you advance your quest and fight for Thedas’s future."
"RALLY THE VEILGUARD Rally a team of 7 companions, each with rich lives and deep backstories. These are characters to befriend and even fall in love with. Among them, an assassin, a necromancer, a detective, each and all bringing their own expertise and unique abilities to the fight. You are never alone — decide who to take into battle, and together face down demons, dragons, and corrupt gods. - Recruit Distinct Companions — Your team is full of individuals with grim and wondrous histories, their own personal struggles and motivations, and rare skills that’ll help you survive. You’ll fight alongside Harding: The Scout, Neve: The Detective, Emmrich: The Necromancer, Taash: The Dragon Hunter, Davrin: The Warden, Bellara: The Veil Jumper, and Lucanis: The Mage Killer. - Rich Companion Stories — Deepen relationships with each companion and learn more about them on your adventures in Thedas. Your choices in these stories will impact how they develop, and completing them might unlock powerful abilities. Create memories with your team that will deepen your experiences in Thedas and give you more to fight for."
"BECOME THE LEADER OTHERS BELIEVE IN Select from different races and combat classes, customize your appearance, choose your character’s backstory, and begin your journey as Rook, Dragon Age’s newest hero. The choice is yours. On your adventures, you’ll gain new abilities and discover unique, powerful artifacts to enhance your own combat style. Brace yourself: there are tough decisions to be made, allies to inspire, and a fight that needs every sword, staff, and bow you can muster. - Be Who You Want To Be — Craft your personalized Rook with a robust character creator. Choose from a diverse set of appearance options for Human, Qunari, Dwarf, and Elf lineages. - Choose Your Way To Play — Select from 3 classes (Warrior, Mage, and Rogue), each with 2 distinct weapon types and unique abilities you can select between mid-combat. Experience new strategic depth as you combine fast-paced attacks, parries, and dodges with the companion ability wheel to exploit enemy weaknesses and seize victory with devastating combat combos. Customize a combat style that works for you. - Deep RPG Progression — Level up your Rook and companions with their own skill trees. Choose perks and combat abilities as you climb towards more powerful specializations. WARNING: See important flashing images and other health and safety information at www.ea.com/legal." [link]
[source: Steam]
#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: dreadwolf#dragon age 4#the dread wolf rises#da4#dragon age#bioware#video games#long post#longpost#I think parts of this blurb might be new? maybe? 🤔#like some parts of it I definitely 100% remember like the glittering cities and teetering on a knife's edge#but some parts I don't feel familiar with#like factions splintering and who will you trust#and like i post/paste everything to my blog#and I can't find the bits I don't feel familiar with on here except in this post obviously#but I don't see anywhere on steamdb where it mentions the 'about' blurb was updated lately#🤔🤔#update: I think I found where it's from originally. :D dont mind me hhh
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fairest of the fair
#hi! im alive and back and etc.#six the musical#six the musical fanart#katherine howard#thinking of that post going 'i think eventually you become the person you needed most' and like maybe that's the thing with my art#this started out as a redraw and <improvement meme> i think i've finally reached the stage where i'm making the things that my younger self#aspired to create. like i can do this now! i've reached That level of technical skill! tiny me would be so proud. it's very gratifying#redraw from august this year actually. i've made a surprising amount of improvement HAHA maybe it was the adamandi stuff getting me#back into digital rendering. i think that obsession has quietly slipped away but yknow. one never truly leaves a fandom. just less intensit#also speaking of old fandoms! we're back with the six stuff haha. as of writing i'm in the midst of blog revamp- figuring out how to chill#multifandom status doesn't mean ditch all the old stuff ! but i do feel much freer and less stressed. i think hiatus has been good for me#notes on this piece particularly: redraw about cutting hair and thinking of the lyric above. also lowkey &j ref + pinterest poem excerpts#of female suffering. and maybe a dash of amanda heng let's walk inspo. this work is really just full of contradictions..#1. the mirror and cutting hair as an act of self liberation 2. the & is part of the lyric but also a nod to &j (in another iteration it was#pink but the white looked better) and like. &j is really all !!! girl power!!! etc. and i was like hmmmm. also matching pink shiny aes#3. the frame as a cage; the mirror as a self reflection idea (ie. saville's propped insp) but also as a sign of vanity. 4. sparkly costume#and pretty pose- read one too many poems about women feeling like they have to be pretty even in their suffering. something i wanted to#explore. and also in 5. the show itself... all you wanna do is. despite all the dancing and pink and sparkly the content of the song is#darker. and even though it's a story of her suffering it's still presented as a shiny fun pop song and ajshdhfhfh ok... 6. the lyrics fall#outside the frame. sort of a caught inbetween. sort of a trapped in the narrative and yet#within the frame it's all. vaguely handwavy breaking free vibes. like i said contradictions?#7. cutting off the long ponytail vs the pull my hair lyric at the end. yeah#8. the blocked off & looks a bit like scissors. positioned to cut right at the neck#anyways yeah irl remains hectic! but if i get around to more doodles they'll appear here :)
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e&a
summers in the midwest
#made this back in june and completely forgot about it#my game was glitching bad at the time#AND i had other photos i wanted to add to this but I decided I didn't like them and it wasn't worth the effort to edit#this looks a bit like an album cover#this is completely noncanon to their story as none of these people have ever been in the same room all at the same time#maybe at like a school assembly but never next to each other#e&a#avia elmer#daniella gracelynn#blare bier#connor penn#connor first appearance!!#hes ellas best friend other than avia#his part in the story is a long explanation#sims#ts4#sims 4#ts4 story#sims story#simmer#ts4 simblr#simblr#ts4 photo#ts4 photoshoot#ts4 photography#edit#sims edit#ts4 edit#the quality on this looks ass unless you open it in another tab *sad face*
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& ofc he dreams of her
#knives and rem .......#trigun#i was thinking ab all the unsaid things btwn them when i was drawing them and then the evil song blood drive joshua burnside came on#and made me cry and i waslike this is literally embarrassing so i didnt come back 2 it HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH#also rem doesnt look like rem bc i changed her hair also im bad at making ppl look like source material#same face syndrome go crazy#i do like the way i drew knives though i will be honest w you#also i was like maybe this is a touch ooc.but it feeds the part of me that wants rem 2 see her boys all grown up#and the part of knives that still yearns 4 this stuff even if he is embittered by now (shrug)#lg doodles#knives trigun#rem#trigun maximum#millions knives
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A drawing for the birthday boy 🔥🔥🔥
#a lil late but we ain’t taking bout that#my art#koichi hirose#jjba koichi#hirose koichi#happy birthday :3#I wanted to post this yesterday#but i forgor#jjba#jjba fanart#jojo's bizarre adventure#jojos bizarre adventure#jojo no kimyou na bouken#jojos#jojo fanart#jojo part 4#jjba part 4#diamond is unbreakable#jjba diu#jjba diamond is unbreakable#:3#HAPPY BIRTHDAY KOICHI HIROSE MY POOKIE WOOKIE SUPER DOOKIE WE LOVE YOU KISS KISS#the only straight person in jojo (maybe)#jsjsjs#i love him he’s so silly#it’s actually kinda funny how I love him but despise Deku for the same reasons I love koichi#rewatching diu rn#and watched an iceberg about lost media of TV azteca while making this
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Wyatt’s stomach was still churning too uncomfortably for him to think about dinner, nor did Brynn seem too bothered either; she was far more interested in taking herself to bed. He’d been too distracted to notice earlier, but he suddenly realised she hadn’t even brought a bag along with her.
Wyatt: You didn’t bring anything with you? Brynn: I not really have anything… Wyatt: If I knew you were going to set out with nothing, I might not have been so keen to let you leave. Brynn: It was important to me. Wyatt: I know. Brynn: You came to find me, didn’t you? Wyatt: Perhaps-.. but I changed my mind in the end. Brynn: Before or after you fail? Wyatt: [snorts] In between. Brynn: I not mean to ghost you-.. I hoped to get a new phone, but something more important popped up. Wyatt: It’s okay.. I have your phone, by the way. Brynn: Oh-.. is Gael still breathing? Wyatt: Unfortunately. Brynn: Maybe you knock some sense into him. Wyatt: I doubt it. Brynn: Hm, me too-.. I would have liked to see his face. [Wyatt snickered lowly; he should’ve taken a picture]
Wyatt: Would you still have come back? You know, if it weren’t for-… Brynn: I always plan on coming home. Wyatt: I take it you were busy saving your money? Brynn: Yes! Though your friend Darien helped me in the end. Wyatt: I’ll have to pay him back then. Brynn: Pfft, I pay myself! That’s why I take so long. Wyatt: I could’ve helped you, if you’d asked. Brynn: I not think it fair. Wyatt: What do you mean? Brynn: Is so expensive. Wyatt: And? Brynn: I not want to bankrupt you. [Wyatt squinted, realising he’d never mentioned the fact that his lifestyle didn’t quite match his bank account] Wyatt: Brynn, I could buy us a private jet if I wanted-.. several, in fact. Brynn: Really..? Wyatt: Mhm. Brynn: You live so modestly; I never would know. Wyatt: Well, at least you’re not after my money.
Brynn chuckled sleepily; she hadn’t returned with the intent to sit idly on her hands, but it was nice to know there was no rush to find employment, or to make money. She was beyond exhausted after the past few months
Brynn: Does that mean I not have to get a job? Wyatt: Not unless you want one. Brynn: Will you keep yours? Wyatt: Probably not. I just wanted to know what it felt like-.. mundanity. Brynn: Is kind of rewarding, no? Wyatt: Oddly so. Brynn: I think we have something more rewarding to spend our time on soon. Wyatt: How long do we have to, uh.. prepare? Brynn: I not know exactly. Wyatt: You haven’t been to the doctors? Brynn: I not able to just walk in without being registered! I feel fine, anyway. Wyatt: We’ll sort it out tomorrow-.. get you some clothes n’ stuff afterward. Brynn: You are soft. Wyatt: Only for you.
With no worries left unsaid and no more secrets between them, Brynn draped herself over Wyatt and crashed-.. hard. Some people clearly didn’t understand her choices, but she’d never felt so loved, seen, or safe with anyone else before. She was finally home, and for the first time in her life, she was truly content…
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#ts4#sims 4#simblr#ts4 story#sims story#forever in between#fib#wyatt shaw#brynn franz#dialogue dump#ahaaaa#idk i got carried away and who could be arsed putting all that text on a bunch of screenies#i love theeeeemb#like.. make no mistake wyatt is still wyatt and you wouldn't wanna cross him 😅💀#but i think it's so fun to see the lil journey he's been on in part thanks to brynn#i feel like maybe he's finally scraped some of his humanity back u kno#idk if he would've done so if things hadn't turned out the way they did#he rlly oughta thank oscar tbh ahaaaaa#and maybe leah.. u kno.. for [redacted] [redacted]#ig the brain rot will rlly make u do a several months long arc just for a pregnancy announcement huh?#🧠#thanks brain#ily#ALSO! PARALLELS!#do ya see it.. do ya?!
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mizisua
#first part of a series of drawings of all of the main 4 alien stage guys' ships#ie ivanmizi#and mizitill#and ofc ivantill#and maybe suatill too idk how i feel about them#but no suaivan sorry i dont like them ship wise#anywho i LOVED drawing mizisua theyre so. AGH so amazing#the couple ever#their love. is unmatched#thats why they get to be first :3#anyway time for tags#alnst#mizi alien stage#alien stage#sua alien stage#art#fanart#small artist#oosey art#artist#vivinos#vivinos fanart#god i hope i dont get jumped when i finish the straight ships art#its all just fun out here yall#just using these characters as barbie and ken dolls friend thats all#anyway im gonna go bye#ill reblog this whenever i draw the other ships#also did you see their nail polish :3#ok bye for real now
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" ... as soft as talking to a new born, the voice you dream your children would hear during their bed time stories ... "
#the developer knows we will spend a lot of time with this guy; his voice is soothing; his laboratory background music sounds like a lullaby#the way he asked what else do you want to know and said astronomy ... and that whole last sentence at the end#my time at sandrock#mtas#mtas qi#mtas builder#fanart#he is dangerous because i actually like his appearance the most#and owen also looks very charming and he is very polite#but i also like how unsuur sounds when he explained about his rocks#i literally replayed that part 4 or 5 times fhsfsdh for re-choice-ing reason#my favorite part is when i licked the rock and#FHDDHSfhshdhsdsh ///////#hngh i'm so done............#wait until fang starts talking#maybe he sounds charming too when he speaks in a long sentence#even tho it was a mess of a voiceover project; i like portia voice casts#i think they were picked from random people who auditioned for the character; but it what makes them sound so colorful#i think sandrock uses studio's? the voices for sandrock feels too well-situated#but i'm adjusting to accept it all overtime#also if u didn't get what i meant by 'the voice you dream your children would hear during their bed time stories '#it means u want him to be the father of your children#but he would literally refuse to tell stupid fantasy story to his children and only pick the space related ones#but the children would sleep well anyway even tho they don't understand anything because of his soothing voice
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okay.
so it's either a very fancy very nerdy little anvil paperweight
OR
little tyelpe had a teeny tiny forge-like dollhouse made for him by feanor, who painstakingly designed every tiny detail and made all toy equipment himself because tyelpe, too young to be in forge, insisted that he absolutely needs to be a smith like his father and grandfather and needs to begin learning now.
and who was feanor to refuse his only grandson who wanted to learn his craft when he only started to walk without bumping into everything? feanor would be elated and would spend hours playing with tyelpe in his little forge. it was before the silmarils when feanor had all the time in the world for his beloved grandson.
the anvil was one of many parts of that dollhouse, one of few that made it to beleriand and the only one that made it through to the second age with celebrimbor.
he could never make himself part with it.
#yeah#nothing better than taking a look at an item appearing for like 1 second and making a heartwrenching headcanon#i love stabbing myself with angst#i headcanon that celebrimbor was very young when they left valinor#not a toddler but maybe an equivalent of 7-8 year old#old enough to understand some things but young enough to be absolutely traumatized#based on that one absolutely amazing fanart of curufin and little tyelpe where he apparently had a nightmare#and curufin says 'no one is coming to take you' and tyelpe responds with 'but they took uncle nelyo'#i saw it some 3-4 years ago and i kid you not it randomly appears in my brain just to haunt me#so he is still a child and was allowed to take some of his toys and obviously his little forge had to come with him#not all of it only some parts because there were more important things to pack#and feanor promised him they would make the missing equipment together once they settled down and were relatively safe#and then he died#and then over the years some of the toys were lost and some were broken#and then celebrimbor was no longer a child and when they had to run he packed food and clothes and weapons not his toys#but this little anvil he would snuck into his pack anyway#and against all odds the anvil made it through the first age unscathed#if there was one thing reminding him of better times it was this#somebody fucking sedate me#brainrot has taken control over my every thought literally#celebrimbor#tyelpe#telperinquar#curufin#feanor#rings of power#beleriand#valinor#first age#silmarillion
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you need some adidas ambassadors? they're your perfect guys
#ts4#sims 4#ts4 gameplay#ts4 legacy#tjol legacy#tjolc#tjolc gen 1#ts4 edit#oscar valenzuela#riku kobayashi#my sims#is this part of gameplay? riku is a model#idk??? but maybe they did this photoshoot first then went jogging#showing those adidas fits you know and then promoting the shoes#i shouldve put him in adidas socks and shorts and also changed oscars shoes. does white even match his outfit?#i randomly picked their athletic outfits what looked good then realised! hey theyre wearing all adidas. adidas ambassadors 😏#i was inspired so rare little edit from me! and i ran out of gameplay#first one just a casual pic (i like the pose) then second is the shoot#i dont even thinks it right font but eh its looks similar doesnt it
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