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im-not-drowning-you-are · 1 month ago

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Remus “suggested” that I should do this. I personally see this as quite unprofessional.

I’m Regulus, if it is not obvious enough. If you call me anything else, especially my deadname, I will have Evan send Barty after you. Barty does not take transphobia nicely.

I use he/him. Or occasionally they/them. If you use anything else, it’s off to Barty you go.

I am sixteen years of age, and I am a Slytherin.

I will not discuss my sexuality. It does not seem relevant.

Do not question my heritage. Nothing is wrong with it. I am, however, French. That is all I shall say.

I might occasionally use this for my poetry. If my so called “brother” interacts with my writing, I will auto-defenestrate. Do not test this. If you are not Sirius, you will likely find my poetry and ideas with #the poetry yet to be written and #the poetry of the stars

I do like to dabble with painting and many different arts from time to time. Ideas for these will most likely be under #the art yet to be done and #the art of the stars

My violin is one of my passions.

If you spell or use the wrong type of grammar, I will not hesitate to point it out.

I am not an illegal animagi. To suggest such, would be incorrect. Do not look into it.

My Acquaintances

@hopein-dorasboxx - she is my best friend. I do not have a lot of those, but she is one of them. She is allowed Reg and Reggie privileges.

@girlinthemeadow - she is a little crazy, but I do like her.

@bat-b0y-barty - he is fine. I tolerate him more than I should. He only occasionally makes fun of me, so he’s perfectly fine.

@evans-roses - he is considerably better than Barty. Do I occasionally want to throw myself into a lake because of them both, maybe, but he is better. I murdered his relationship, though. I don’t deserve him.

@redwearingred - she is better than most, and is really nice to read literature with.

@everyhouseishaunted - he is a great person to read pieces of literature with.

@sirius-ly-awesome - if you see him, run. Or he will. Depends on who you are in relation to him.

@prongs-plural - I miss him. I hurt him so much. I am such a shitty excuse of a person.

@marlene-mckickin - I do not know he well enough beyond her friendship to Lily and the fact that she is dating Dorcas.

@go-lonedove-xo - he is the book man. Pandora seems to enjoy his company.

@the-hb-prince - I do not interact with him much, so I cannot say.

@mary-mary-not-contrary - she dislikes my brother, which is always a positive.

@dumb-german-boy - he is in my brother’s so called “boy band.”

@frank-n-bottom - I barely know him.

@alice-the-fortescue - I barely know her.

@bella-tricks-skeeter - I am related to her.

@beetlethebards-second-coming - she creates nothing but gossip and rumours.

Playlists with my friends and others are located below.

If you want to join, just ask @bralnwashed or myself (or literally anyone. Someone can get you in touch)

I do have a life, so I won’t be active 24/7

My regular account is @the1970sdeadgaywizard-regulus

I write things there

I use he/him most often, but literally anything is fine

My name is Regulus (wow, inception)

I DO NOT MEAN TO BE RUDE WHEN GRAMMAR POLICING, IT JUST MAKES SENSE

If there is anything that I end up reblogging here that makes no sense, chances are I was stupid and didn’t switch over accounts

I do not normally speak like a sickly Victorian child. These few sentences, however, do seem to prove otherwise. That could quite possibly just be an issue that only occurs to me.

Do I curse? Idk. We’ll see as time passes (I do when I deem it necessary or in character)

I don’t support JKR. Also, basic stuff, if you are a jerk, you will be blocked. I don’t take hate. Constructive criticism, sure, but hate of people who have done no harm, heck no.

I do actually love the arts and play violin.

I am a Slytherin.

I use passive aggressive periods for the heck of it. It seems very Reg.

Any French that I may use will probably be translated. I will check a few times using different things, though.

#marauders roleplay #marauders rp #regulus black roleplay #regulus black rp #jegulus rp #jegulus roleplay #the poetry yet to be written #the poetry of the stars #the art yet to be done #the art of the stars #Spotify

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catinasink · 10 months ago

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introduction teehee

most recent edit: 2/03/24

hi!

general questions

who am i?

i'm cat (dont capitalize, as in Cat) and tentatively eli or nico. i'm a minor, as well as in middle school (ages 11-14). i go by it/its (if you're calling me cat) or they/he (if you're calling me eli or nico) or no pronouns. i am transmasc agender, aroacespec (aroflux and aegosexual), and pan.

what do i post about/reblog about?

marauders

genshin impact

other random fandoms

dreamscape nexus (...)

life things! (vents, random events, etc)

things about my friends :D

classes outside school (ballroom dance, art, aikido, russian, math)

writing (i am a writer)

music (i post lyrics from music, is fun)

gay (i am gay)

my friends

family, pets, friends?

one older sister

two cats - kim and shego (or floorshitter)

irl friends:

pissboy (my husband. he/they) (pissboy origin story)

lee (my wife. not a permanent nickname. she/her)

preppy (my wife, not a permanent nickname, she/her)

miss eighth* grader (she/they, talks abt sui a lot)

ashes (she/her, my bbg)

may mention some other ppl as well lol

can you tag me, ask me questions, tag me in chain asks or tag games?

sure, i might not participate in tag games or chain asks tho :>

timezone?

PST, inside a sink

dni?

if over 25, bigots in general, the usual

what can you call me?

no: bro, guy, gal, sis, girl, man, boy, dude, etc. (gendered terms in general)

yes: pet names (sarcastically and/or platonically, ofc) such as sweetheart, honey, bbg (please dont fully type out babygirl); lil guy is fine

i might call myself a girl or a boy, dont take this as permission please x

*used to be miss seventh grader

other info

i would appreciate tone tags if you feel you are speaking too vaguely, but otherwise it's fine

am either a slytherin or ravenclaw. slytherin most-likely

am INTP-T

scorpio sun, sagittarius moon, scorpio rising (i think)

pandora sun, lily moon, regulus rising

i speak english and russian, am learning german and hebrew (long story)

one sideblog, @catinasink-writes, this is only for my fanfiction

i also have another sideblog. kudos to you if you find it

I might ask you to explain a sentence or a phrase for me, it's bc words tend to not be understandable for me sometimes

i. might be neurodivergent

please alert me if you're going to leave, it scares me sometimes

am matching banners with @shrimpysstuff!! go check her out, her blog is wonderful :3

tags!

ramblies, vents, anything thats not a reblog and doesnt fall into another category: #cat's rambles

posts mentioning my cat, or with my cat: #cat's cat

writing (in general): #cat's writing

writing (actually writing: #poetry maybe

my art: #cat's art

my asks: #cat's asks

posts made during school (tend to be queued): #cat's schoolposting

music-related posts: #cat's lyricposting

my own music: #cat's lyrics

my beloved friend @this-is-me-lolol: #basil my beloved <3

pissboy, my friend: #my lovely pissboy

my friend @o-kye: #tumblr user o-kye

cali cult: #calicos

sink lore: #happenings of the sink

blender anon: #cat's blender anon

dear anon (dreamscape nexus thing): #cat's dear anon

dreamscape nexus (...): #Dreamscape Nexus

ao3 details

my account (catinasink)

i've got a good feeling that we could be something

rated T

the Selection but rosestarkillerchaser

features the Blacks as the Schreaves

the Order as the rebellion

rosestarkillerchaser, emmarlily, wolfstar

unfinished, 8/30 (estimate)

watching pixar on a school night

rated T

a texting fic for the marauders 5th year and skittles 4th year

modern au w magic

rosestarkillerchaser, emmarpanlily/sunkeeperflowerseer, wolfstar

background benjy/peter + nobleflower + frank

slowburn

unfinished, 25/?

they're so pretty it hurts (i'm not talking about boys, i'm talking about girls)

rated T

oneshot about marlene

in the universe of wpoasn

features slavic marlene!! bc that is my love >>

also ace marlene!

2.7k words

finished, 1/1

dear angel lacy, eyes white as daisies

rated T

in the universe of wpoasn

noblesea (molly and alice) focused

has noblesea, nobleflower, and fralice (polyam alice)

slowburn

unfinished, 2/8 (estimate)

fic summaries (definitely accurate)

tumblr writing masterlist (chronological order, first most recent)

song-resembling thing (aka big mistake) (with voice ;-;)

maybe one day

to old friend once again

jolly ranchers

to v

my love

piano

fuck periods

more vent (green)

to my old friend (again)

to my old friend

more poetry/rambling/vent whatever :>

more poetry

poem thing that blender anon said i should share

have a nice day!

#cat's rambles #cat's writing #intro post!#<- previous intro post can be found in that tag

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rehlie · 6 months ago

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peter pettigrew headcannons:

german and swedish, really likes thrillers, has a cat called olin, he started a poetry and literature club in sixth year, he wears friendship bracelets with pandora, has the prettiest sea green eyes you’ve ever seen, noticed remus‘ condition the first but didn’t tell the others to protect remus, has reding glasses but would never wear them, is aroace, he/they pronouns

#peter pettigrew #young peter pettigrew #marauders #headcanon #the traitor

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thefixeraa · 2 years ago

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INTRO TO PANDORA.

subject matter : the silent four / the network . the foundation of pandora in the years before its creation .

the foundation of pandora has only existed for two decades . the organization itself has existed since world war I ( 1917 ) . the birth of espionage [ pigeon messages , a can of maps … mata hari , a dancer with high ranking admirer’s – – was hired by french intelligence to spy on the germans . ] operation nightwatch was planned by the united states government , forming a group of three men and a woman [ they are known as : ‘ the silent four . ’ ] nightwatch came from the mind of john j. pershing ( a decorated general of the u.s army ) , under woodrow wilson’s presidency . a sort of modest thing before the united states entered into the game of espionage .

gabriel kane , born in new york city in 1890 and the son of irish immigrants . during the first world war , he was the member of the 77th division , which saw extensive action in the meuse - argonne offensive . kane’s unit was tasked with attacking german fortifications along the front lines , and he quickly distinguished himself as a fearless and high skilled combatant . he was wounded multiple times in battle but continued to lead his fellow soldiers with bravery and determination . gabriel’s talents did not go unnoticed by his superiors , and he was eventually handpicked to join a special operations unit tasked with carrying out covert missions behind enemy lines . he excelled in this role , using his knowledge of the terrain and his ability to blend in with the local population to carry out a variety of missions , including sabotage and aviation , he enlisted in the army and intelligence gathering . it was during one of these missions that general john j. perishing first took notice of kane . after overseeing a assignment in which kane was sent on a dangerous reconnaissance mission , perishing was impressed by kane’s bravery and resourcefulness and subsequently recruited him into the silent four .

anthony price , born in philadelphia in 1890 from humble beginnings . he was heavily interested in civil rights movements , since both his parents were people of color . he also wrote poetry , often getting his poetry and articles published ( he talks about a lot of topics that are very personal to him , and sometimes becomes scrutinized for it . ) when world war 1 came about , he set off to join the army - in particular the harlem hellfire company in the 369th infantry regiment , a mostly all black company that initially were regulated to minor labor duties . eventually he and his fellow company men were sent to the front lines to fight along side the french army . price was a skilled linguist and fluent in french and german , which proved usful and he became a valuable asset to his company . during the battle of belleau wood , the harlem hellfire company saw extensive action , being tasked with capturing a heavily defended german position . anthony showed exceptional bravery and leadership , leading several successful assaults on enemy positions and earning respect of his fellow soldiers . to use his linguistic abilities to gather valuable intelligence on enemy movements and positions . he was eventually recruited by george creel , one of the six men who founded tsf .

damien knight , born in wichita kansas in 1891 , his parents owned a small airplane manufacturing business . because he grew up around airplanes and aviation , he enlisted in the army and underwent flight training , quickly proving himself a skilled and fearless pilot . one of his missions took place during the battle of saint - mihiel . knight was tasked with leading a squadron of planes on a bombing run against a key german supply depot . despite heavy anti - aircraft fire and enemy airplanes , knight and his squadron successfully carried out the mission , dealing a significant blow to german forces for the war effort . he was soon to be recruited by another member of tsf , who recognized his bravery , tactical skills , and the ability to think on his feet . he became an important member of the group , using her aviation expertise to carry out covert missions . his piloting skills were especially valuable in situations where the group needed a quick extraction or others in dangerous situations .

elizeabeth stone , elizabeth was boring in boston massachusetts in 1893 to a wealthy family of philanthropists . during the worked as a nurse , working on the front lines to care for wounded soldiers . she was stationed in several locations throughout europe , including france and italy , and gained a she developed a network of contacts among soldiers and civilians , and used her knowledge to help the allies plan reputation as one of the most dedicated and skilled nurses in her unit . she often went above and beyond her duties to provide comfort and care to soldiers , even under dan gerous condition or help was known to venture out into “ no man’s land ” to retrieve injured soldiers who were stranded or under fire , risking her own safety to ensure they were received medical attention . during her service , she also developed an interest in intelligence gathering , and began to secretly collect information about enemy troop movements and other military intelligence . she developed a network of contacts among soldiers and civilians , and used her knowledge to help the allies plan strategic operations . stone showed bravery and her intelligence gathering skills caught the attention of one of the founders of tsf , who then recruited her to work as a covert agent . as a member of the group , she used her medical knowledge and intelligence - gathering skills to carry out a range of missions , often going undercover as a nurse or aid worker to gather information or help resistance groups .

TIMELINE OF EVENTS ,

1918 - 1920 :

the silent few ( tsf ) extends to include more agents after the first world war ends . focusing on recruiting veterans of the war , giving them promise and purpose ( especially if they’ve felt lost and disconnected after the war . )

the organization becomes more structured , with specialized teams for intelligence gathering , field operations , and research and development etc .

it establishes its headquarters in washington d.c , and has offices across the united states and the world as a safe place for agents to go to while on a mission .

1921 - 1939 :

tsf continues to grow and adapt , now going by a different name , called the network . it continued to develop new technologies and tactics for espionage and covert operations .

the organization's reputation for effectiveness and discretion attracts the attention of influential government officials and wealthy benefactors .

agents are involved in a number of high - profile missions , including efforts to counter soviet espionage and sabotage during the interwar period .

1940 - 1945 :

with the outbreak of world war 2 , the silent few plays a critical role in gathering intelligence and conducting sabotage and espionage operations against the axis powers .

many agents served in the armed forces , using their specialized training to aid in military operations . while others fought alongside the military as a show of support .

during this time , the network continues to recruit and train new operatives , expanding its tanks to include specialists in a wide range of fields ( including cryptography , linguistics , and technology . )

1946 - 1960 :

in the aftermath of the war , the network shifted its focus to countering the emerging threat of communist regimes around the world .

the organization engages in covert operations to support anti - communist forces in countries such as korea , vietnam and cuba .

the network develops new technologies and techniques for surveillance and intelligence gathering , including the use of satellites and advanced encryption methods .

1961 - 1989 :

during the cold war , the organization plays a key role in working to gather intelligence and thwart soviet espionage efforts .

it becomes increasingly secretive and compartmentalized , with many agents operation in isolation from one another .

during this time , the agency develops advanced weapons and technologies for use in covert operations .

1990 - 1995 :

with the collapse of the soviet union and the end of the cold war , the network finds itself facing a new era of uncertainty and shifting geopolitical priorities .

the organization struggles to adapt to new threats such as terrorism and cyber warfare , and begins to face criticism for its secrecy and lack of accountability .

during a period of weakness , a man named conrad ashe would assassinate top network individuals and any agents who were loyal , take over the organization . effectively wiping it clean and starting over . thus pandora was born , in a new world with new possibilities .

#* out of chara .#* world building ‚ pandora .#okay so this is the first of many... and i mean many posts that i'll be making #also they're going to be vERY long as well so...#yeah...#hope you enjoy reading it tho!

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greypetrel · 2 years ago

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Hi! What’s your favorite book??

Oh damn you uncovered Pandora's box, THANK YOU FOR DOING IT. :D

I can't choose only one to save my life, but a selection of my favourites, dividing between prose and poetry/theatre... Under the cut because IT LONG. And I'll jump at every chance to speak about my favourite books. (ask the Literature major about books and have them go on rambling for hours)

Prose:

- Lord of the Rings, J.R.R. Tolkien . Getting into the saga has been one of those formative events for me, as for many other people around. It's an adventure, it's full of love and hope, it can be fun and light and go into deep themes as well. I'm in love with all of Tolkien's works (the fairy tales are so sweet and tender, you can see how much he loves his children reading Roverandom)(and Tree and Leaf has a special place in my heart). I majored in Germanic Philology because of him, and I can say I wouldn't be the same person if I haven't ever read LOTR.

- Master and Margarita, Mikhail Bulgakov. Another one of those books I can tell had a "before" and "after" in my life. I LOVE a good satyre, and Bulgakov is just *chef's kiss*. Wouldn't recommend it to anyone that knows little of Russian History or thinks erroneously (sorry not sorry get better informations) that Lenin was a good statesman and a good person. But... There's love, there's a sad woman being empowered by going outside the fence and expectations, good and bad are reversed, there's this very russian theme of strong women saving their male love interest (or trampling them. Seriously, female characters in Russian or Ukrainian as in this case classic authors are SOMETHING ELSE). Social and political criticism. And, a giant cat walking around Moscow and causing ruckus, and I don't know what you could possibly want more from a book.

- The Count of Montecristo, Alexandre Dumas. I distinctly remember barging into my therapist studio after I finished it and saying I was sad because yes I could read this book again, but it wouldn't ever be the first time again. What a glorious, epic book! Managing to mash epic themes with that underlying TRASH that it's typical of Dumas and he manages always to make work so well (the convenient cave full of treasures that NOBODY ever found but this one priest? Seriously Alexandre? XD ). Great, great, great book.

- A Room of One's Own, Virginia Woolf. It's one of those books, along Animal Farm and Se Questo è un Uomo, that I'd have EVERYONE read. It's technically non-fiction, but Mrs Woolf had her way to make it a great read. Go read it if you haven't.

- Two Years, Eight Months and Twenty-Eight Nights, Salman Rushdie. Salman Rushdie could write a shopping list and make it the best thing ever. I love his style, I love magical realism, and I'm choosing this only because it was the first I read and I had a blast. It's glorious it's great, I love it, and I'm so sad Midnight's Children has such a lame adaptation (but it's not a book that's easily translatable if not in a series Game of Thrones long...).

- Everything is Illuminated, Jonathan Safran Foer. My goodness, the heartbreak of this book. It's one I have quotes saved around notebooks. It's heart-breaking in the most beautiful way, he's definitely one of those authors you either love or hate... I'm on the love end of the spectrum.

- Pride and Prejudice, Jane Austen. It's basic bitch of me, I know. I don't care. As above, I'm all for social satyre and Miss Austen was just on another plane of existance on that. I'll fight people saying she wrote romances. She did not. Northanger Abbey holds a special place in my heart as well, but who doesn't have a crush on Mr Darcy, beside people who read this book thinking it was a romance? No no no read it again in the perspective that the author is mocking the heck out of every single character. Lizzie included. Austen is FIERCE. And Mr Darcy is such a beloved character because he learns from his mistakes and he's not afraid to admit it. Wow.

- Vita Scritta da Esso (Life written by himself), Vittorio Alfieri. I am not the biggest fan of italian literature, it's too much impronted on realism at all costs and MEH. Vittorio Alfieri was an anglophile and one that looked well beyond the Alps for his writings. His life was so entertaining and damn if he can make it entertaining and fun! That man travelled Europe, looke the fucking Kaiser in the eye (it was very offensive to do), had affairs with a Duchess, his long term partner was another English noblewoman... Who was married! And they were together since they met until he died! She was the one who published this Autobiography! Also personal preference: he wrote a whole satyre saying shit about the Accademia della Crusca and I love him madly for that. GO READ ABOUT VITTORIO ALFIERI.

Poetry/Theatre:

- Gitanjali, Rabindranath Tagore. Stop everything you're doing and read this. Now. You're welcome in advance.

- Poem Without a Hero, Anna Akhmatova. Anna Akhmatova would be very welcomed to step on me, I'm saying this shamelessly, it's just... URGH, it's melancholic, it's epic, it's heart-gutching.

- Anything by Christina Rossetti. Anything. Give me Christina Rossetti and some pre-raphaelites and I'd be happy.

- The Waste Land/The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock, T.S. Eliot. That man loved his quotes. I loved that man because he loved his quotes and it's lyrical in a way that... Oh. How he depicts loneliness. "Coffee Spoons" is a quote from Prufrock ("I have measured out my life in coffee spoons". Is it pretentious? I don't care I have FEELZ for that poem)

- Cyrano de Bergerac, Edmond Rostand. The marvel of this comedy can't be fully expressed by words, I love it, I adore it, it made me feel better with myself as an owner of an important nose.

- Macbeth/Othello/Much Ado About Nothing, William Shakespeare. I majored in English Lit and I couldn't leave the Bard outside. I can't choose between these three, and choosing only three was difficult. I spent once 3/4 of an hour in an exam only speaking of the first three lines of Othello and I could do it again, ask me about it. :)))))

- Sir Gawain and the Green Knight. IT IS THE BEST THING EVER I love the Arthurian Cycle and this little thing is just... AAAAAAH. Gawain is a bisexual icon (it's not me headcanoning, he smooches both men and women, it's him. YOU GO GAWAIN). Yes I have deep feelings for the movie as well, Dev Patel we're not worthy of you.

I am leaving outside a lot of thing that I will remember in ten minutes and cry profusely about, yes. Also I am containing myself over fangirling about poetry too much because you won't hear the end of it otherwise, there are some things of Sylvia Plath and Auden and Yeats and Maya Angelou that just melt my little dark heart, but this is already far too long...

Also in this house we stan that Bob Dylan earned his Nobel Prize, fuck you Alessandro Baricco.

#personal crap #books #poetry #I should not be given leeway to talk about books or poetry if you want me to stay syntetic #am I sorry? Absolutely not.

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daymarkist · 3 years ago

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Hope in the Night: A Web

Gustav Klimt; "Hope II" (1903) // Bertolt Brecht; "Motto" // Paramore; "Last Hope" // Arlo Parks — "Hope" Music Video (dir. Molly Burdett) // Voltaire; Candide // Vincent van Gogh; Almond Blossom (1890) // Hesoid; Works and Days (96-9)

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mystacoceti · 5 years ago

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from “The Essay as Form”, Theodor Adorno

“Destined to see what is illuminated, not the light.” Goethe, Pandora

That in Germany the essay is condemned as a hybrid, that the form has no compelling tradition, that its emphatic demands are met only intermittently—all this has been said, and censured, often enough. “The essay form has not yet, today, travelled the road to independence which its sister, poetry, covered long ago; the road of development from a primitive, undifferentiated unity with science, ethics, and art.” [1] But neither discomfort with this situation nor discomfort with the mentality that reacts to it by fencing off art as a preserve for irrationality, equating knowledge with organized science, and excluding anything that does not fit that antithesis as impure, has changed anything in the prejudice customary here in Germany. Even today, to praise someone as an écrivain is enough to keep him out of academia. Despite the telling insights that Simmel and the young Lukács, Kassner and Benjamin entrusted to the essay as speculation on specific, culturally pre-formed objects, [2] the academic guild accepts as philosophy only what is clothed in the dignity of the universal and the enduring—and perhaps today the originary. It gets involved with particular cultural artifacts only to the extent to which they can be used to exemplify universal categories, or to the extent to which the particular becomes transparent when seen in terms of them. The stubbornness with which this schema survives would be as puzzling as the emotions attached to it if it were not fed by motives stronger than the painful memory of the lack of cultivation in a culture in which the homme de lettres is practically unknown. In Germany the essay arouses resistance because it evokes intellectual freedom. since the failure of an Enlightenment that has been lukewarm since Leibniz, even under present-day conditions of formal freedom, that intellectual freedom has never quite developed but has always been ready to proclaim its subordination to external authorities as its real concern. The essay, however, does not let its domain be prescribed for it. Instead of accomplishing something scientifically or creating something artistically, its efforts reflect the leisure of a childlike person who has no qualms about taking his inspiration from what others have done before him. The essay reflects what is loved and hated instead of presenting the mind as creation ex nihilo on the model of an unrestrained work ethic. Luck and play are essential to it. It starts not with Adam and Eve but with what it wants to talk about; it says what occurs to it in that context and stops when it feels finished rather than when there is nothing to say. Hence it is classified a trivial endeavor. Its concepts are not derived from a first principle, nor do they fill out to become ultimate principles. Its interpretations are not philologically definitive and conscientious; in principle they are over-interpretations—according to the mechanized verdict of the vigilant intellect that hires out to stupidity as a watchdog against the mind. Out of fear of negativity, the subject’s efforts to penetrate what hides behind the facade under the name of objectivity are branded as irrelevant. It’s much simpler than that, we are told. The person who interprets instead of accepting what is given and classifying it is marked with the yellow star of one who squanders his intelligence in impotent speculation, reading things in where there is nothing to interpret. A man with his feet on the ground or a man with his head in the clouds—those are the alternatives. But letting oneself be terrorized by the prohibition against saying more than was meant right then and there means complying with the false conceptions that people and things harbor concerning themselves. Interpretation then becomes nothing but removing an outer shell to find what the author wanted to say, or possibly the individual psychological impulses to which the phenomenon points. but since it is scarcely possible to determine what someone may have though or felt at any particular point, nothing essential is to be gained through such insights. The author’s impulses are extinguished in the objective substance they seize hold of. In order to be disclosed, however, the objective wealth of meanings encapsulated in every intellectual phenomenon demands of the recipient the same spontaneity of subjective fantasy that is castigated in the name of objective discipline. Nothing can be interpreted out of something that is not interpreted into it at the same time. the criteria for such interpretations are its compatibility with the text and with itself, and its power to give voice to the elements of the object in conjunction with one another. In this, the essay has something like an aesthetic autonomy that is easily accused of being simply derived from art, although it is distinguished from art by its medium, concepts, and by its claim to a truth devoid of aesthetic semblance. Lukács failed to recognize this when he called the essay an art form in a letter to Leo Popper that introduces Soul and Form. [3] But the positivist maxim according to which what is written about art may in no way lay claim to artistic presentation, that is, autonomy of form, is not better. Here as elsewhere, the general positivist tendency to set every possible object, as an object of research, in stark opposition to the subject, does not go beyond mere separation of form and content—for one can hardly speak of aesthetic matters unaesthetically, devoid of resemblance to the subject matter, without falling into philistinism and losing touch with the object a priori. In positivist practice, the content, once fixed on the model of the protocol sentence, is supposed to be neutral with respect to its presentation, which is supposed to be conventional and not determined by the subject. To the instinct of scientific purism, every expressive impulse in the presentation jeopardizes an objectivity that supposedly leaps forth when the subject has been removed. It thereby jeopardizes the authenticity of the object, which is all the better established the less it relies on support from the form, despite the fact that the criterion of from is whether it delivers the object pure and without admixture. In its allergy to forms as mere accidental attributes, the spirit of science and scholarship [Wissenschaft] comes to resemble that of rigid dogmatism. Positivism’s irresponsibly sloppy language fancies that it documents responsibility in its object, and reflection on intellectual matters becomes the privilege of the mindless.

Non of these offspring of resentment are pure falsehood. If the essay declines to begin by deriving cultural works from something underlying them, it embroils itself all too eagerly in the cultural enterprise promoting the prominence, success, and prestige of marketable products. Fictionalized biographies and all the related commercial writing that depend on them are not mere products of degeneration; they are a permanent temptation for a form whose suspiciousness of false profundity does not protect it form turning into slick superficiality. This can be seen even in Sainte-Beuve, from whom the genre of the modern essay derives. In products like Herbert Eulenberg’s biographical silhouettes, the German prototype of a flood of cultural trash, and down to films about Rembrandt, Toulouse-Lautrec and the Bible, this involvements has promoted the neutralization of cultural works to commodities, a process that in recent intellectual history has irresistibly taken hold of what the Eastern bloc ignominiously calls “the heritage.” The process is perhaps most obvious in Stefan Zweig, who produced several sophisticated essays in his youth and ended up descending to the psychology of the creative individual in his book on Balzac. This kind of writing does not criticize abstract fundamental concepts, aconceptual data, or habituated cliches; instead, it presupposes them, implicitly but by the same token with all the more complicity. The refuse of interpretive psychology is fused with current categories from the Weltanschauung of the cultural philistine, categories like “personality” or “the irrational.” Such essays confuse themselves with the same feuilleton with which the enemies of the essay from confuse it. Forcibly separated from the discipline of academic unfreedom, intellectual freedom itself becomes unfree and serves the socially performed needs of its clientele. Irresponsibility, itself an aspect of all truth that does not exhaust itself in responsibility to the status quo, then justifies itself to the needs of established consciousness; bad essays are just as conformist as bad dissertations. Responsibility, however, respects not only authorities and committees, but also the object itself.

[1] Georg Lukács, “On the Nature and Form of the Essay,” in Soul and Form, translated by Anna Bostock, p. 13.

[2] Ibid. p. 10: “The essay is always concerned with something already formed, or at best, with something that has been; it is part of its essence that it does not draw something new out of an empty vacuum, but only gives a new order to such things as once lived. And because he only newly orders them, not forming something new out of the formless, he is bound to them; he must always speak ‘the truth’ about them, find, that is, the expression of their essence.”

[3] Cf. ibid., pp. 1 - 18.

#pearl diver

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herzdieb · 5 years ago

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ask game: angel, blush, bubbles, cutie pie, daisies, euphoric, kitty, soft

angel; do you have a nickname? yup, herz is my nickname

blush; what was your stuffed animal as a child? we were kinda poor so i had this one stuffed animal that was a kangaroo and i had it my entire childhood

bubbles; do you have a best friend? i do, i’m a person with a tight knit close friend/best friend circle though

cutie pie; most precious item you own? my dad’s old, WWII german typewriter on which i still sometimes write poetry and notes

daisies; describe a moment when you felt free. the one moment that comes to mind right away is where me and @ifishouldvanish were in Paris, just walking through Tuileries Garden towards Louvre

euphoric; talk about someone you love.

(oh boy, you had to open that pandora box didn’t you)

i love a lot of people; family and friends, but none the way i love @ifishouldvanish. and i try to tell and show her that every day. it might be corny and it might make some of you eyeroll but taking a few minutes per day to let someone know they are your world and are loved, really makes a big difference. and besides, why wouldn’t i do my best to make sure she is loved and happy?

this is one of the best relationships i’ve ever been in and i can’t imagine my life without her.

we don’t even watch DW but i love sending her doctor x rose gifs, among them this one:

kitty; what’s your favorite time of the day? definitely the time between 8PM - 3AM; it’s where everything seems to wind down, i get super creative, you can kick back after work, have dinner. it’s just, a really creative and relaxing time.

soft; describe your favourite spot in your house. bedroom, hands down. for obvious and not so obvious reasons

come ask me more stuff!

#ohhelga #ask game #thanks babe!#this was really fun

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diveronarpg · 6 years ago

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Congratulations, KAY! You’ve been accepted for the role of PORTIA with an FC change to TIFFANY MEIA. Admin Rosey: *chants with you* PANDORA PANDORA PANDORA PANDORA! So one thing I absolutely adore when getting applications is when the names of the characters are dissected. But at the end of it, you had tacked on something I found very interesting -- “Pandora will always be a gift given away.” And with that you suckered me in so easily that I couldn’t help but love and adore the interpretation of Pandora that you presented on a silver platter. You made her charming, you made her someone I admire and adore. You added such humanity to her when I expected her to be a mechanical thing. Kay, I can’t wait for you to join the family and let Pandora bring her ambition to light! Please read over the checklist and send in your blog within 24 hours.

WELCOME TO THE MOB.

Out of Character

Alias | Kay

Age | 24 soon to be 25 and I can hear the grim reaper calling my name.

Preferred Pronouns | She/her/hers

Activity Level | I’m currently in school and in another group, but with that being said I’m online practically every day. I can get on to plot every day and post a reply or two at least every other day!

Timezone | EST

Current/Past RP Accounts | Here is my current blog!

In Character

Character | Portia, Pandora Phan. If possible, I’d like to switch her FC to Tiffany Meia!

Pandora, origin: Greek, meaning “All-gift” Just as her namesake before her, Pandora will always be a gift to be given away.

Phan, origin: Vietnamese, meaning unknown

What drew you to this character? | Is it cliche to say the first line in her bio? Because the first line had me hooked right away. “The sense of wonderment that others had as children was lost on Pandora Phan.” She was never a girl that worried herself with fantasies, always looking at the reality of things and analyzing how and why things are. She didn’t concern herself with the fantasies and lies parents would tell their children, and instead wanted to know the truth, the bottom line of it all. To me, Pandora is this girl who might come off as soft and pretty to some, but she’s really a girl with hard edges and a razor blade tongue. Every word that comes out of her mouth is very deliberate, calculated to maximize the impact they’ll have.

What is a future plot idea you have in mind for the character? |

a. Mother, may I speak now? Pandora spent her formative years having her voice fall on her parent’s deaf ears. So while she doesn’t speak unless she truly wants to, she makes her voice heard above all others. She’s someone that will use her voice to get what wants when she wants and she doesn’t care who she has to step on to be heard. And with that, comes enemies even within her own affiliation. Are there members that want to see her fail? What will she do to prevent that from happening? Who does she think she is?

b. Did the pressure weed you out? Odin is an ever-present figure in her life and it bothers her that she doesn’t know why. He’s one of the few people that can truly match her word for word, cut for cut and it makes her worry. She wants to know why he’s putting up a front of helping her when they’re on opposite sides. Will she listen to his words? Will she actually believe them? What steps will she take to make sure she doesn’t toe the line and fall into his trap? Who exactly does Odin think she is? I’d love to answer all of these!

c. Do you sleep anymore? Obviously, being a captain for the Montagues is sometimes she takes pride in. Pandora is someone whose work ethic is feared above all else; she’s known for being a cold and calculating woman in the gang. But she wants more. She spends her nights figuring out ways to claw her way to the top so she can be the one laughing at the end of the day. Just what, or who, is Pandora willing to risk on her way to the top? Will she survive long enough to be the queen that takes the king?

Are you comfortable with killing off your character? | As the Tralfamadorians say, so it goes.

In Depth

In-Character Interview:

What is your favorite place in Verona?

Personal questions always rubbed Pandora the wrong way. Why people wanted to know such intimate things about others was lost on her. Some things were better left tucked away in the back of her heart. And yet, she found her lips parting before she realized what was happening. “Castelvecchio Bridge.” The faintest of smiles grace her lips as memories flood her mind. She remembers her childhood spent there, legs dangling over the edge. She remembers her teen years, smoking too many cigarettes and drinking too much wine on a blanket by the water’s edge. She remembers her adulthood, escaping her parent’s meetings to catch a glimpse of the swans floating by. “There’s something beautiful about the water in the middle of a war, don’t you agree?”

What does your typical day look like?

“I wake up and I go to work.” A memory of blood strewn across a table flashes in her mind. How unfortunate that the last collection she went on ended with her getting dirty. That poor silk blouse is worthless to her now. But, she didn’t ascend to her position without getting some blood on her hands. She glances at the underside of her nails, checking for any residual blood she missed the first three times she had scrubbed them. “I enjoy the view from the office then I go home to my fiancé. I have a simple life, really.” She swallows the bile creeping up her throat. Pandora has tried everything in her power to make her life anything but simple. Her typical day is filled with cutting remarks and blades pressed to skin, with sweet nothings and knives pressed into others backs. The only view she enjoys is the sight of someone realizing just how dangerous she is.

What has been your biggest mistake thus far?

Mistakes were never something Pandora took pride in. Sure, she looked at them as lessons, something that taught her how to properly do something in case the situation ever rose again. But, she hated the process. She would berate herself in private for doing something so foolish, so dumb, so immature. Pandora Phan the Captain was anything but those things. On the other hand, Pandora Phan the Child was not. “When I was at university I fell for an artist. I ignored everyone’s advice and she broke my heart. How naive I was at that age.” A wave of the hand shows that’s all she’s willing to say about it. She’s handing the interviewer a nugget of truth. A tiny kernel of the story without telling him the ending of it. A broken heart never did any girl any good, now did it?

What has been the most difficult task asked of you?

The word engagement burns her tongue and she has to fight to keep it down. She never signed up for the arrangement her parents made between the two families - she never had a choice in the first place. Their engagement had been just another business transaction in the grand scheme of things, a handful of signatures that sealed their shared power for the future. But playing the pretty fiancée was getting old. Their engagement was beginning to bore her and felt more like a sentence than an agreement. Sharp nails tap the desk between the two, fighting for seconds to come up with a reasonable answer. “Does this interview count?” Her head tilts to one side, the corners of her lips turning upwards as she spoke. “I have other things that require my attention instead of sitting here playing this silly game with you.”

What are your thoughts on the war between the Capulets and the Montagues?

Actual war was never something that interested her, but the benefits that came from it did. With every war came those who profited from it and Pandora was one of those. Because of their war, she was able to escape from a dull life to something more stimulating. She had a chance to be more than a little girl with chaos in her name. “The war went on for hundreds of years before me and will continue for hundreds of years after me.” It’s an answer devoid of any actual meaning, meant to distract the poor man sitting across from her. The interview might be required by her boss, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t have a little fun with it. “Lions do not concern themselves with the opinions of their cubs, so my thoughts are nothing but wasted breath to my superiors.”

Extras:

Right here is a mock blog for her, here is an insta edit for her, and I am a sucker for headcanons so here is a mile long list of them.

Drugs might not be one of her vices, but caffeine and cigarettes definitely are. More often than not she can be found with either a cup of coffee or a cigarette, or both, in her hands.

Panda is really good at card tricks. As a bored teenager, she learned various card tricks to fill her time with. Just picture a teen Panda running around Verona scamming people outside of bodegas because she knows how to slip a card between her fingers.

Her main weapon might be her words, but very few know about the pocket knife she carries on her at all times. It might be old fashioned, but she prefers her weapon to cut in a similar way to her words.

She’s a sucker for poetry, with her favorites being Charles Bukowski and Pablo Neruda. The way that they form their poems and prose is something that she was always interested in replicating.

Panda is in love with learning languages. She’s fluent in French, Italian, Japanese, Spanish and is learning German.

She has a degree in linguistics and classics!

She spent some time traveling as a form of rebellion but thanks to that, she found the Neuschwanstein Castle in Germany. After a trip to Munich to fill up on nothing besides beer and pretzels, she visited the castle on a whim and fell in love with it.

As someone who doesn’t speak often, she has a very expressive face. I picture her looking into the camera like Jim on The Office whenever something goes wrong.

She reads the New York Times every day and does the crossword in pen.

I didn’t make a playlist for her, but I listened to a lot of Citizen and Joji to really get a feel for her. ‘Slow Dancing In The Dark’ by Joji and ‘Roam The Room’ by Citizen are the two songs that really gave me Pandora vibes. I also wanted to thank you for letting me reserve Pandora! I wasn’t sure I was going to finish her app in time but here we are, submitting right before the deadline lmao.

#accepted #accepted: portia

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queen-of-wisdom · 6 months ago

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“Foreigners out!

Foreigners out!

Germany for the Germans;"

Cool and what am I then?

Just some clown with a red passport

And the fear

That you will the do

The Thing

The Thing that I told everyone that you wouldn't do again

The Thing you promised to never let happen again

The Thing that haunted us all

(Or did it not haunt you too? Did you ever cared? Did you ever feared that it would happen again?)

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the-annoying-mom-friend · 3 years ago

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hello tumblr

Hi! Just made a tumblr account! That’s super fun.

So a bit about me, I am from Croatia, which is an European country if you didn’t know that. (The football world cup 2018 runner-ups, that’s us!)

I am a theatre kid through and through, with my favourite musicals being starkid musicals (but I yet have to see all of them, I never have time for that), starry, spies are forever, but I am a huge fan of in the heights, rent soundtrack (still haven’t seen the movie, again, I need to find time), six (kinda basic, what can you do), bonnie and clyde, tick tick boom, west side story, bridgerton musical (I did watch the first season of the show, honestly not a fan but Burn For You and Penelope Featherington slap), and that mostly being it.

I also love reading! My favourite books are Girl, Woman, Other (it has so many good takes on race, gender, and orientation), The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo (honestly such a great book), the midnight library (my comfort therapy session book), and the book thief. My favourite genre is vaguely described as history fiction.

My favourite shows are The Good Place, Glee, and Brooklyn 99. I am not a movies kind of person, but if I had to pick favourites, it would be In The Heights and the new West Side Story.

I enjoy writing (essays, fanfiction, original prose, poetry, screenplays...) and baking. I speak two languages (Croatian and English), and I am trying to learn German (not going extremely well). I do drama classes (we're putting a show in June, it's a jukebox musical retelling of the pandora's box). I love singing, not very good at it.

I am a minor, so the unappropriate content will be blocked and reported. Please do not interact if you are sexist, racist, homophobic, transphobic, ableist, all things like that. Not really sure will that drive those people away, but it's important to me to clarify that this blog is and always will be a safe space for everyone who is kind and respectful.

If you think we like similar things, follow my blog! If you think we could get along, send me a message!

#new user #hello #starkid #the good place #b99 #musical theatre #broadway #starry musical #tin can bros #shipwrecked #historical fiction #baking #writing

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bloodandwinemuses · 7 years ago

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Acting is the expression of a neurotic impulse. It’s a bum’s life. The principal benefit acting has afforded me is the money to pay for my psychoanalysis. — Marlon Brando

CHARACTER SUMMARY

Fame has always been an unavoidable part of his life, no point in downplaying or omitting that. It’s hardly manageable for a kid growing up not to endure whispers in the hallway and people poking questions at his mother’s health and whether or not she will make a comeback. For Alexander, dodging all of this unwanted attention was a tiresome sport in his childhood, and continues well into his adolescent years. Because his family is one rooted in the public eye. Almost everyone, mind you, except for him. If there is anything about Alexander that is undoubtedly certain, it’s that he hasn’t got the faintest idea what he wants to do with his life, not least of all because his older siblings have all commendable carriers in the limelight, all of which have served to rekindle their station as a celebrity clan, of sorts.

By contrast, Alexander knows he’s the outsider, the quiet one, the dreamer and artist; the one branded as a genius because some doctors once insisted that his linguistic capabilities far surpassed that of his peers. But what he wants more than all these promising labels is a shot at normalcy - at being a normal kid without the need to impress anyone or live up to this idealized and glamorized idea what he ought to be.

The only impasse is his passion: acting, namely, which requires an audience he is not ready to face, as aimlessly as he tries to figure out who he is, and how to be comfortable in his own skin. Only when he can shed his skin does Alexander breathe freely, secure in the constraints of being somebody else. Poetry, drawing, acting - these three are his loyal companions. In a way, all he needs is right there, in art, for it opens up the possibility of sharing without exposing himself. The fear of being misunderstood is much too crippling to be courageous. His motivation, his fuel, therefore, is to find himself in between piles of different personalities, hoping he’ll feel comfortable with being just himself some day.

APPEARANCE DESCRIPTION

Although there is nothing inherently odd about his appearance or any physical flaw which would merit the urge to hide, his attire directly reflects Alexander’s wish to appear as unnoticeable and dull as possible so as to avoid unnecessary attention. Layers of clothing, wide, loosely fitting shirts and harems pants usually shroud his slender frame, making him appear smaller and thinner than he really is. His body irks him because it’s essentially delicate, with small shoulders, lean muscles and a fast metabolism to boot. It doesn’t help that he only stands as tall as 6’0 either. Are a few more inches that much to ask for? These perceived flaws aren’t borne out of a self-conscious swamp but rather the awareness that his physique - along with his fitness - is crucial. There is always more that can be done and more often than not, his body feels to him akin to a barrier as opposed to an instrument.

Generally, off stage run-ins with Alexander vary greatly. Even his pitch and voice texture seems more a spectrum than a fixed tone, as he mostly just carries on being a poseur around people - including but not limited to what he sounds like. To customers at the shop, his voice is quiet yet attentive and pleasant. Soft, in short, so that regulars have quickly come to appreciate such a polite and soft-spoken boy, in spite of his easily forgettable appearance from short-cut, jet black hair to light-brown, kind yet perceptive eyes and high collared shirts. Every now and then, though, his tattooes peek through, tiny art bits crafted mostly by Avery, his co-worker and friend, from colored to black and white. Most motives convey his personality, all of which are placed in private or easily coverable places. From swallows to lizards and trampled roses, everything is there in his rapidly growing collection of tattoos. In the hope that, someday, there will be a person special enough to uncover and look at him;see him.

PERSONALITY DESCRIPTION

What you get will be an expedition of masks; a panorama, one more vibrant and beautiful than the other. But most importantly, it’s what people want to see. This, Alexander will readily and willingly display without any word of complaint. A contagious grin, a lilt in his voice as he responds - optimism all around. Beneath it, however, loom self-absorbed doubts, all-defying pessimism down to almost nihilistic streaks and self-pity - the ugly, labyrinthine passage he allows scarcely few to see. Nobody wants that, he’d argue, withdrawing instead even further from himself to welcome others, and to be regarded as a positive influence. The only thing he can’t readily fake off stage is confidence - especially towards assertive, fiercely capable and sure-footed personages. It’s a bit like staring into a mirror, then, his own treacherous desires staring back at him in the form of a person older and comfortable with themselves.

What are Alexander’s greatest gifts to aligning talent and technique as an actor are likewise his greatest weaknesses beyond art: hypersensitivity and introspection. While it is easy to become immersed in a role, it is getting increasingly harder for him to be just himself. Examined in close, intimate moments, it is said he is too intense, and his doubts and overwhelming sensitivity a turn off. It’s not that he is a fragile boy about to break; the crux boils down to his fear to be misunderstood and to lose any chance of finding friends - or most notably a partner - to accept him as the compassionate, tactful, sensual man that he is, without looking away from his self-consciousness, the tiring transitions between two absolutes (e.g. blind idealism and crushing pessimism), his struggle to relate to others, and his inability to manage in a practical world.

Essentially, Alexander is a liar with the penchant for it, missteps notwithstanding. Most of what is appealing about him remains an act in the end, no matter how free, daredevil-like and fun he may be around you - any closer scrutiny and one will knock over Pandora’s box - so what tragedy could be worse than hoping it’s not true? Because he means well? Because, at his core, he is either dumb or lion-hearted enough to still believe there is a place for authenticity and idealism in this piss-poor-poseur production that is this world?

SKILLS / COMPETENCES

Technically, Alexander speaks three languages to varying degrees of proficiency starting with his mother tongue, Japanese, and ending with Avery’s insistence on teaching him German. English is undoubtedly the language he has gained fluency in while only being able to come up to a lower intermediate level in Japanese, which secretly bothers him more than he lets on, not least of all because it puts a barrier between his grandparents and himself when he’s visiting – and his siblings, to some extent, as he is the only one struggling – so it equally annoys him that, even though both languages are hardly comparable in any objective sense, he seems to be having a much easier time learning German where he’s already at a lower intermediate level despite only having studied it for a little over two years.

Now, having always had a natural affinity for languages, Alexander easily picks up new languages with little difficulty. His heart, however, beats in accordance with the bard’s works, hence his decision to have loitered around England for a while to pursue an English degree. No art school, despite his parent’s attempts to pester him into giving it a try. His artistic prowess notwithstanding, Alexander has likewise undergone training as an aspiring actor, even having starred in a few low-budget productions at his local theatre back in his hometown. Indeed, he even is in charge of an acting course for children from nine to thirteen – naturally with the main focus being on Shakespearean plays.

INTERPERSONAL MANNER

Despite genuine efforts being made, Alexander is not the ideal friend he tries to be, often at odds with what he initially thought people were and what they really are, causing him to hardly sustain his empathy off-stage. Consequently, there is this disconnect between him and others, this distance that cannot be breached no matter how buoyant or otherwise uncomplicated he comes across. As a result of this, Alexander has been called selfish, self-absorbed, whiny, vain, pretentious - just too much work.

Having always been the odd kid cradling outrageously expensive special editions of classics and Classics alike, he isn’t necessarily close to his family. At least conventionally, Alexander returns the sentiment of love - really, he does - but neither can they identify, much less understand them - nor can he understand their motivations for pushing him, relentlessly so, to publish his works and move up the prestigious ladder of receiving the recognition they believe he deserves. Put simply, his tendency to idealize people - to dehumanize them, in a sense - and to admire anyone and everyone on a pedestal puts him at a disadvantage and, in the same vein, in the unpleasant position of never feeling close to anybody - because he doesn’t see them whilst he doesn’t allow them to see him, too mortified by misunderstandings. Fearing confrontation, Alexander usually steers clear of dating altogether all the while having firm ideas about what romances should entail: namely understanding and acceptance, though exactly this pair is challenging to come by for the likes of him.

Inspired by: an actor’s panel I found on Youtube, Dandelion, very loosely (TW)

#bio outline;Alexander #bio outline

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chaotic-leo-energy · 7 years ago

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A 100 Follower Special!: 100 Things About Me!

**Gets depressing a bit** My name is Chloe. 1. I am a Leo. 2. I was born July 27, 2000. 3. That means I'm 16 (as of now). 4. I am an ENTP. 5. I'm in 11th grade. 6. I live in Central Pennsylvania. 7. I was born in Albany, New York. 8. I moved to Pennsylvania when I was 9. 9. I won first place in a poetry contest in my school and third place in the state. 10. I describe myself as obnoxious and loud. So do other people, to be honest. 11. I LOVE MEMES. DANK MAYMAYS. 12. My favorite bands are Breaking Benjamin, Panic! At The Disco, and My Chemical Romance. 13. My lucky number is 13. 14. My favorite song in the whole world is Iris by The Goo Goo Dolls. 15. My favorite movie is Dead Poets Society. 16. I want a tattoo of a simple infinity sign on my wrist. 16. I also want a tattoo of the words "Love Always, Charlie." from The Perks of Being a Wallflower on the side of my right arm. 18. I tend to talk fast. 19. My favorite character in the Marvel Universe is Bucky Barnes (obviously) 20. I love Vaporwave. 21. I think Harry Potter is the best fandom. 22. My favorite quote: "But whatever realm of reality we seek out, we find it woven of fictions." 23. My favorite actor is Jonathan Rhys Meyers (August Rush). 24. Sugar We're Going Down would be on the soundtrack of my life. 25. I'd rather try something myself than be taught. 26. My longest relationship was a month. 27. My first kiss was at a rollerskating rink. 28. I have pretty bad anxiety. 29. And depression. 30. I like to make jokes about my depression and anxiety to hide it from others. And myself. 31. I am a huge extrovert. Because as a kid I was socially anxious, I got rid of it by putting myself out there, continuously. 32. The first alternative rock song I listened to was on a BMX game, it was called Face Down by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus. 33. My favorite Panic! At The Disco song is Northern Downpour . 34. My favorite song by My Chemical Romance is Demolition Lovers. 35. My favorite song by Breaking Benjamin is Into The Nothing. 36. I say now, that I will NEVER try drugs. 37. I'm 5'9" 39. I am ridiculously in love with Bucky Barnes. 39. I love putting on make up. To the point where I feel that I'm not myself without eyeliner . 40. I have short hair, but I'm growing it long. 41. My parents once found Destiel fanfic I was reading and they think I'm into gay porn. 42. I've been to 7 mental hospitals. 43. I've learned that it's okay to be unhappy, as long as you don't give up on hope. 44. I want to edit and publish books for a living. 45. I plan on self publishing my own poems, and calling the book, "The Philosophical Sorrows", hence my username. 46. I feel everyday that I will never be successful. 47. I have Chronophobia, the fear and anxiety of time moving. I feel that life is going too fast and I'll never catch up.. 48. I go through periods of time where I'm down and people who are close to me can tell because I'm over the top happy (to hide it) or I'm super silent (when I have no energy to hide it). 49. I've only had one best friend. 50. I have reactive attachment disorder, where I can't form healthy relationships with my family or friends, meaning I push them away. 51. As a child, I was a terrible liar . 52. My best day ever was in a residential (a more free mental hospital, to explain it simply) it was St. Patty's day and we spent the entire afternoon picking four leaf clovers, and listening to Green Day Radio on Pandora. I was 13. 53. My most profound day was in a residential (again), I found my faith in God. My best friend (my only best friend) convinced me to go to the church on the campus, I was feeling down that day. But when I went, I learned that God put me on this Earth for a reason. 54. My best friend, Marissa got discharged from that residential before I did. Two years later, I saw her again, this time in a mental hospital, and the song that was playing when she got discharged was Let Her Go by Passenger. That was the last time I ever saw her (read to the next number). 55. The saddest day of my life: Once I left the mental hospital, I went to another residential for 11 months, then to a group home-like place for 2 weeks because my parents didn't like it. They brought me home and two months later I got my phone back. I found Marissa on Facebook and messaged her. Her mom messaged me and said she committed suicide 3 months ago. I cried for the longest time, listening to Let Her Go on repeat. 56. Everyday I think that I should've been there, I should've worked harder to get out of those places. 57. I'm sorry that I'm a failure to my parents. I constantly am told that I'm immature and that I don't make them happy. 58. It's been almost 3 years since I've been harmful towards myself. 59. I try everyday to "Fake it til' I make it." 60. Therapy hasn't worked for me. 61. I have chocolate brown eyes. 62. I'm a Gryffindor. 63. I'm Irish and German. 64. I'm adopted. 65. I went through 11 foster homes before I got adopted. 66. I have mild mild OCD. 67. I think Italian food is the best food. 68. I'm an adopted Italian. 69. When I sit down, I say I have Italian rolls (my stomach). 70. I don't know if I want to live to when I'm old. 71. My favorite adult cartoon show is Rick and Morty. 72. My favorite TV show is Supernatural. 73. I'm a Sam girl. 74. My favorite Marvel movies are the Captain America series. 75. My favorite episode of Supernatural is Season 6, Episode 20, The Man Who Would Be King. 76. My favorite Supernatural character is Castiel. 77. My favorite Rick and Morty episode is Season 2, Episode 8 is Interdimensional Cable TV 2. 78. I talk a lot. 79. I have a lot to say about so many things. 80. I'm an independent-right, but I respect people's opinions as long as you're not impeding on me. 81. Use your facts. 82. I wanted to be a Mass Communication Specialist in the US Navy, but I can't with my mental status. 83. I'm in love with the Linkin Park memes. 84. So now I can't listen to Crawling or In The End by them. 85. I literally hate Black Veil Brides. 86. I hate people who pretend they're transgender or gay/lesbian. It's NOT the new "in" thing to be transgender or gay/lesbian, be who you are. 87. I'm a dog person. 88. I've written 21 poems and counting. 89. I'm very scatter brained (can you tell by the list?) 90. I have an unhealthy obsession with the 🅱 emoji. 91. My good friend, Neo, has a funny YouTube channel and I might appear on a video. His channel is NiNiBoiTV, check him out. 92. I say "Boi" a lot to my friends. 93. I get to know people to late. 94. I procrastinate with everything except school work. 95. My favorite color is Indigo. 96. I want a llama and I want to name him Poncho. 97. It's hard for me to write when I'm feeling down. 98. My favorite class I've ever taken in high school so far was a World History class in tenth grade. 99. I want to pull a senior prank next year and hang up embarrassing pictures of teachers. Or fill the entire school with memes. 100. I look forward to the rest of my life. Thank you for reading if you did, and I hope to get to know all of you as well. Sorry I got deep there. Remember, if you need someone to talk to who won't judge, I am here. I love you all and THANK YOU FOR THE 100 FOLLOWERS.

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yenrps · 7 years ago

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Acting is the expression of a neurotic impulse. It’s a bum’s life. The principal benefit acting has afforded me is the money to pay for my psychoanalysis. — Marlon Brando

CHARACTER SUMMARY

APPEARANCE DESCRIPTION

PERSONALITY DESCRIPTION

Examined in close, intimate moments, it is said he is too intense, and his doubts and overwhelming sensitivity a turn off. It’s not that he is a fragile boy about to break; the crux boils down to his fear to be misunderstood and to lose any chance of finding friends - or most notably a partner - to accept him as the compassionate, tactful, sensual man that he is, without looking away from his self-consciousness, the tiring transitions between two absolutes (e.g. blind idealism and crushing pessimism), his struggle to relate to others, and his inability to manage in a practical world.

Essentially, Alexander is a liar with the penchant for it, missteps notwithstanding. Most of what is appealing about him remains an act in the end, no matter how free, daredevil-like and fun he may be around you - any closer scrutiny and one will knock over Pandora’s box, to put a top to his energetic demeanor, and the ‘thinking while doing’ philosophy which he has adopted and taken to heart. Because, at his core, he is either dumb or lion-hearted enough to still believe there is a place for authenticity and idealism in this piss-poor-poseur production that is this world?

SKILLS / COMPETENCES

INTERPERSONAL MANNER

Despite genuine efforts being made, Alexander is not the ideal friend he thinks he is, often being at odds with how he wants them to act and what they’re really like. This, in turn, accentuates his inability to sustain his empathy off-stage. Consequently, there is this disconnect between him and others, this distance that cannot be breached no matter how buoyant or otherwise uncomplicated he comes across. As a result of this, Alexander has been called selfish, self-absorbed, whiny, vain, pretentious - just too much work.

Inspired by: an actor’s panel I found on Youtube, Dandelion, very loosely (TW)

#bio outline #bio outline;Alexander

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seadrops · 1 year ago

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( jennie kim, cis woman, she/her ) — the ton welcomes CLARISSA ‘RISSA’ TOUSSAINT, the YOUNG MISS from BRIGHTON. excitement is aplenty for this social season, and i’m most certain the TWENTY-FIVE year old MISS RISSA TOUSSAINT will be no different. whispers have told me that they are ARDENT & ASTUTE, but do you not agree that they can be HAUGHTY & FANCIFUL at times? perhaps it’s because i think of floating in vast, dark waters, not knowing where you begin and where the sea ends ╱ hair gathered in a black ribbon, curls loose and wild, girlhood not entirely abandoned ╱ the turning pages of a book read well after midnight, filling the silence of your home library ╱ fingers sunk into marble skin, delicate to the eye, but unyielding to touch when i see them. surely lady whistledown knows them as THE QUIXOTIC, but i have yet to see their name in her papers.

— penned by ciel; pinterest.

BASICS.

NAME: clarissa alaia toussaint. NICKNAME: rissa. AGE: twenty-five. PLACE OF BIRTH: brighton, england. NATIONALITY & ETHNICITY: british & korean. GENDER: cisgender woman. PRONOUNS: she/her. SEXUAL ORIENTATION: bisexual. RELIGION: anglican by birth; agonistic. PARENTS: hugo toussaint & francesca toussaint née fitzwilliam. SIBLINGS: aurora toussaint (elder), priscilla toussaint (elder), franklin toussaint (younger). LANGUAGES: english, korean (fluent), german (conversational), french (conversational) HOBBIES: notating her books, studying different philosophies across time, amateur cartography & piano playing.

STORY.

I. her mother would tell the story of her near swan song birth for years to come — how she’d cried as loud as any storm before going near lifeless, tiny body blue from lack of oxygen. how her mother felt hope and life drain from her as she lie in bed, certain her newly born infant would be called so soon to god. you were my miracle baby. thirdborn and three times as lucky, she had said with eyes so fond and full of love that rissa had not thought to look deeper than surface level. II. if only her mother had known the possibility of misconstruing one’s own nativity story. miracle. yes, that is exactly what she was. the story of her origin only validated what she had known in her bones from early childhood. she had no doubt her siblings would go on to accomplish a multitude of things, — they were cut from the same cloth after all, and such was their inheritance — but none would become something as great as she. III. proving herself however, was a herculean task. if she was three times as lucky then she was also three times more likely to be scolded. rissa could not fight dancing to the thrum of music only she could hear, doing as she pleased from an early age. education only seemed to embolden this streak, grooming her ambition and impulsiveness to character flaws rather than mere curiosities. freeing hunting dogs from cages, writing letters to parliament, and a failed attempt to sneak into the city of london all before age nine had her mother at wits end. IV. pandora’s box had long been opened and it was too late to unsew the stitch that had been knotted. rissa could not be dissuaded from her look upon life, her idealistic world view painted with broad strokes of philosophy on the inherent goodness every human being is born with. the loveliness of life was something she desperately clung to, shutting out the coldness of her father’s gaze and curl of her mother’s lip with flowery poetry and epic stories of faraway lands. she clung to education. V. something ugly wound its roots around her rib cage when her younger brother was accepted to oxford. who was more deserving than her? who more zealous, more driven? who more perfect? her hunger to become something more ate away at her insides as her mother pushed to move to london for a season. she was quickly surpassing majority age, which was equally as mortifying. VI. marriage had always been an assured aspect of rissa’s future — as sure as her shining future achievements, she would have it all. being faced with reality was never her strong suit however, and the odds of anyone of the appropriate status being interested in her and her ambitions seem slim. this goal is something she is not willing to compromise on (though she is rare to compromise in general), but her mother has opposing plans.

QUICK FACTS.

many could mistake her rebelliousness as intent to insult her upbringing and her family at large, but they’d be wrong. her unhappiness doesn’t stem from her family or station in life, but from the truth that it is not enough. her rose colored glasses have deluded her into believing that she can have her cake and eat it too. she can be rebellious and transform the world, but still retain her status and wealth. she can have her ambitions with a spouse who supports her willingly every step of the way. whether this is true or not remains to be seen.

she has an opinion on anything and everything and if she’s asked about something she’s never heard of or tried or done then she will do it and get back to you posthaste!

she cannot admit she’s wrong. she cannot compromise with others. she cannot admit she has a weird laugh.

she wanted to sneak to london to meet the king btw. she fr thought she could talk her way into seeing the king.

definitely spends an absurd amount of money on dresses and shoes without a doubt.

she has a poor relationship with her father as he is incredibly emotionally distant from all of his children barring his son, who he is still emotionally distant with, but can hold a conversation. that’s more than what his daughters can say, especially rissa. she’s not quite a black sheep, but she’s not too far from it at this point. not that she would allow herself to realize she’s one anyways.

she definitely believes the world and the country must change and that things can be made better for people everywhere, but she still also believes that there’s nothing wrong with a monarchy being in place too so like…………yeah, delusional.

is also a self described pacifist. she believes almost all situations can be resolved without violence (and by extension war).

she’s actually not religious at all. she doesn’t outright disbelieve in god, especially not publicly, but she thinks her faith and time are “better worth spent in the corporeal world” like girl shut up.

the toussaint family immigrated from france through her paternal grandparents. they had a great deal of wealth when they came to england, but a lack of title paired with french accents made them social pariahs. hugo being born and raised within the culture helped, but only so much at the time. it wasn’t until they managed to arrange a marriage between hugo and francesca that this changed — the fitzwilliams were of very high standing amongst the gentry and close with several noble families. they had the standing while the toussaints had the money; falling onto hard times with a few bad investments made the fitzwilliams desperate. marrying francesca was the ultimate move that paid off, and hugo was eventually awarded the title of baronet by the king a few short years later.

while the marriage panned out for hugo, it did not for francesca. she’s very embarrassed that she was forced to marry down and it’s always been something of a great shame of hers. hence her obsession with making sure all of her children marry as best as they can.

WANTED CONNECTIONS.

her brother actually. they’d be dysfunctional as hell

maybe a potential betrothal? doesn’t have to be cemented by any means but it’d be fun bc her mother is a notorious meddler and she wants to make a really good match for rissa as she sees who her children marry as an accomplishment

anyone who challenges her world view or train of thought

could be along the lines of the above but an intellectual rival

people she can be delusional with. let’s get crazy

idk i just want something absolutely insane

#intro #mayfair:intro

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