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bellobambino · 11 days ago

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The Claim That Broke the Camel's Back

828 words

Summary: Frustrated CS student, Luigi Mangione, battles the maddening bureaucracy of his insurance company while juggling midterms and back pain. An underwhelming trip to Panda Express inspires him to make a change. Luigi's POV Author's Note: I could write about incompetent insurance reps all day. My whole life is working with this broken fucking system. Free Luigi.

I'm on my third cold brew of the day to get ready for this evening Machine Learning lecture. I'm wired, to say the least. I've written down a few questions I have for the professor that I'm hoping will be covered by the midterm review he's “gifting” us today.

"Good evening, folks!" he booms, addressing the class. There’s a few murmurs from some students giving a half hearted hello. "I was debating whether or not to make a midterm review for this section of the course. Considering your test scores from February..."

My phone vibrates with a 1800 number I know all too well. Dammit. I've been waiting a whole week for them to call me back about this billing mistake. I can’t believe they’re calling right now, but I have to settle this billing issue. I sigh, and claw my way out of the row of backpacks and purses, answering the phone as quietly as possible.

“Hello, this is Luigi.” I spit it out like I've said it a thousand times, flinging open the back door to the main hallway.

“Hi, Luigi, this is Tiffany calling from Blue Cross Blue Shield. I’m returning your call about a claim you want to appeal.”

Appeal? Appeal. Because nothing says "customer service" like making me clean up a mess they made and then gaslighting me about it.

I’m whisper-shouting now, rehashing for the millionth time how I never got the bill they insist they mailed to an address I haven’t lived at since MySpace peaked. Tiffany’s hitting me with the most insincere “mm-hmm”s—" i've ever heard.

“Why did you send the orthopedic bill to my parents’ house? I don’t live there,” I say, trying to keep the vein in my temple from exploding.

“Mr. Mangione, can you confirm your address for me, please?”

Confirm my address? I swear to God, these people couldn’t find their own ass with both hands and a Garmin. “Which address do you have on file for me? Because you’re sending this bill to Maryland, and I live in Pennsylvania.”

Tiffany pauses like she’s consulting the Oracle of Delphi. “Mr. Mangione, I’ll need you to confirm your mailing address in order to continue discussing your account.”

Breathe, Luigi. Breathe. “Fine. 212 Fairway Lane, Baltimore, Maryland, 20906.”

There’s the familiar clackity-clack of her keyboard, a sound I’ve come to associate with malicious incompetence. “Okay, Mr. Mangione, can I put you on hold?”

“Hold? You guys are killing me. I’m a full-time student; you called me in the middle of a lecture.”

“I’ll need to review your account information in order to transfer the case to the billing department.”

Hold on. “You’re not the billing department?”

There’s a pause so thick you could spread it on toast. “This is the claims department.”

I could scream. I peek through the window of the lecture hall door. The TA’s handing out the review sheet, and I’m out here playing phone tag with someone who doesn’t even have the power to solve this issue. “Alright, Tiffany, can you just give me the billing department’s direct line? So I can call when i'm not in class.”

She rattles off a number. I punch it into my phone notes like I’m defusing a bomb. I thank her—halfheartedly, because I was raised right- and hang up.

I'm back in my seat, having missed the professor going over test expectations. I unlock my phone and look at the number Tiffany gave me. Wait. I look at my recent call log.

No way. It’s the exact same number I’ve been calling for weeks. The member services line. An automated phone directory service that will "connect you to the best department", but only sends you in circles for hours just to disconnect you when you’re waiting to speak with a supervisor.

They’ve already threatened to send the bill to collections—a bill I’ve never even seen. They told me the procedure was 100% covered. Now I’m supposed to fork over cash I don’t have for something they said I didn’t owe in the first place.

Back at my dorm, I'm eating Panda Express alone like a fucking schmuck. The noodles taste like cardboard. I’d kill for my Ma's chicken parm. I gotta call her.

I finish up, and grab the take out bag to throw away the container.

Oh, thats right. There’s the fortune cookie. I almost chuck it in the trash, but ... maybe Lu deserves a little treat today.

I crack open the cookie, shoving one half in my mouth, and unfurl the little piece of paper.

Be the change you want to see in the world.

I immediately roll my eyes. The change I want to see is insurance companies prioritizing patients' well being over shareholder profit. If I could do anything about that, I would. Trust me, I would.

I tape the fortune to the inside of my laptop, right next to the sticker of Breloom my sister gave me, and fling myself onto my bed.

Be the change. Maybe I could.

#luigi mangione #uhc shooter #breloom #fic #fanfic #rpf #how do you tag these things #fiction #insurance #united health care

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del-sol-diminutives · 11 months ago

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Review: The World of Sylvanian Families The Official Guide

This book is relatively new; it debuted around Christmas, 2023. It’s 110 pages, hardbound, and written with children in mind, but with value for adult collectors.

You can find some sample pictures of the interior on Amazon, but I wanted to talk a bit about what they do and don’t include, so you can decide for yourself if it’s a worthwhile addition to your own collection.

The book contains a story of the origin of Sylvania, which is heartwarming and sweet, with cute illustrations. The illustrations are the only time some of the vintage families appear in the book.

It also contains a section on the families themselves, including photos of the figures, their names, and the description of each member that you would usually find on the bottom of the box.

(Please forgive this photo’s strange lighting; the weather changed while I was writing.)

The most popular families get their own page and the Chocolate rabbits actually have a two-page spread. The families included are:

the Chocolate Rabbits

the Walnut Squirrels

the Persian Cats (the Persians)

the Huskies (the Huskys)

the Fennec Foxes (the Fennecs)

the Milk Rabbits (the Periwinkles)

the Ponies (the Manelys, plus Bella Chestnut and Giselle Silver)

the Bears (this is the Petite family of bears)

the Hedgehogs (the Brambles)

the Koalas (the Outbacks)

the Highbranch Giraffes

the Penguins (the Waddles)

the Snow Rabbits

the Toy Poodles (the Cakebreads)

the Sheep (the Dales)

the Maple Cats

the Pookie Pandas

the Marshmallow Mice

the Caramel Dogs

the Midnight Cats

the Kangaroos (the Hoppers)

the Yellow Labradors (the Fentons)

the Red Deer (the Buckleys)

the Reindeer (the Snowdrifts)

the Tuxedo Cats (the Marlowes)

the Bubblebrook Elephants

the Goats (the Brightfields)

and the Splashy Otters

The older brothers and sisters have their own page called “In The Town”, separate from the families. Interestingly, this includes Lionel Grand, who I hadn’t considered to be an older sibling. I might have to check his figure now.

The book also includes maps of Sylvanian Village, Sylvania Town, Seabreeze Cape, and Sylvanian Land, the amusement park for the babies. I think this is a fine bit of inspiration for designing your own layouts.

The book also includes descriptions of the seasons and Sylvanian holidays, including both Christmas and Easter.

In the back is a short timeline of Sylvanian Families history.

It is necessarily incomplete, given the target audience and the amount they’d probably have to pack into a book if they weren’t being general. Unfortunately it does not contain the full information on each of the various families and when they were released. There is definitely still room for a collector’s book for adults that includes information on the vintage families and sets.

Finally, the last page in the book is a delightful encapsulation of Sylvanian Families values.

I think this is a wonderful addition and a perfect capstone to the book, and I am very happy with owning it. I do hope that someday there will be a book for adult collectors, with the same kind of aesthetic, but with the full details we would love to have.

#sylvanian families #calico critters #book review #the world of sylvanian families

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theygotlost · 8 months ago

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ok hopefully my phone doesnt die while i write this review of kung fu panda 4

bottom line is dont watch it its not good. all rhe dialogue is bad. as in both the actual words written in the script and the way the actors deliver their lines. there isnt a single sentence that doesnt come out extremely awkward and stilted. even jack black sounds like he doesnt want to be there and the thing about jack black is that wherever he is hes always happy to be there.

also i hope we can track down the person who decided awkwafina should be in every animated kids movie ever from now on and have them shot. and then also kill awkwafina i hate the sound of her voice more than anything.

honestly the movie is just really boring. its mostly expository dialogue for a majaority of the runtime and then the big fight at the end was pretty cool and i forgot that i hated the movie for a second cause at least it was entertaining.

i know this movie is literally for babies but the jokes are all EXTREMELY unfunny and feel a million times dumber. sometimes movies for kids can still be witty and genuinely funny to watch as an adult but this movies sense of humor was for 6 year olds and nobody else

somethings i liked:

there was PANGOLIN voiced by ke huy quan which would have been awesome if he was actually a good character

po's goose dad and bryan cranston panda dad were kind of yaoi. no they werent who said that

tai lung was resurrected to serve cunt for 30 seconds and then died again

#MY FINAL MESSAGE TO THE WORLD GOODBYE

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nerdieforpedro · 9 months ago

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Fare Well

For @wannab-urs Hozier Song Drabble Challenge

Dieter Bravo x plus size female reader (Sweet Pea)

This fic is for those 18+ MDNI

Word Count: about 1.8k (Yeah so…I went past Drabble 👀)

Summary: Dieter has been working so hard. He still has an issue that might be because of his mind. What can he do about it? Do anything else.

Warnings: unhealthy coping, sexual dysfunction, sex work, teasing, pet names, sexual activity (actual and implied I think? I should know. 🙃)

Notes: I listened to this song 5 times in a row because I didn’t really listen to Hozier (now I do). The color this fic is purple or violet, whichever you wanna say it. 💜 I bolded lyrics I was able to put in the fic. 🤗 Thanks to Gin for giving me two Dieter fics to write back to back. ☺️ That little trash panda is always so giving.

Main Masterlist / Dieter Bravo Masterlist / Writing Challenge

Tapping his foot on his hardwood floors, Dieter Bravo is in an all too familiar place. He’s been purposely busy. Keeping occupied except for when he’s completely exhausted has kept him out of trouble, even in the tabloids. People are saying he’s changed for the better. He knows he’s keeping clean, keeping in the straight and narrow.

Bravo has run into a snag on his progress.

The last few paintings had done well in gallery showing, even selling for double than asking price, his last movie was well reviewed. These are both very good things, wonderful. He’s happy, proud even. Bravo is having plenty of sex, mountains of it. In his head. Reality has played out much differently. All this work he’s doing, he hasn’t been able to chase a different high. One he’s used to replace the drugs. It wasn’t that he couldn’t find people to have sex with. He’s been more careful about it, not something he’s been concerned about prior to his new leaf. In doing so, acts he’d normally attempt weight more heavily on his mind and keep little Dee from swelling when needed. Bravo knows the rumor that might be going around but it’s not true! Since his mind is clearer, he actually thinks about who he’s having sex with more and little D isn’t always on board. You know, one of those words his therapist mentioned – cognitive dissonance except it’s happening with his partner in pleasure little D. Big D when he’s feeling in the mood.

He knows he could just go to one of those discreate clubs, seek his needs out there, but he always assumed he wouldn’t need one. The Oscar Winner keeps looking for different projects, in his studio trying out new paints, trying to learn the saxophone (it was a bad idea, but sounded great at three in the morning when he called his assistant and told him what to buy), he then went to a spin class and damn near passed out after fifteen minutes and tried a cooking class but was kicked out for causing an oil fire.

Nothing was working so he called and asked to stop by, check the place out. The owner of course said that was fine – he’s Dieter Bravo, they’d love to have him. Dieter told the owner,

“I’ll take any high. Any glazin’ of the eyes. Any solitary pleasure that masks my sorrow. No drugs though, I’m not willing to backslide over it.”

The owner said they understood and had the perfect person for him.

So now Dieter waits in this room. It’s an array of different purples well violets since this is a more classy place. He wanted to undress to his boxers but was told by the front desk to leave them on. He did remove his shoes, socks and jacket, but otherwise he’s dressed. Simple black slacks and a white button-down shirt that had bellowing sleeves with a deep v-cut exposing his chest down to his sternum. He felt like dressing up a bit but still kept it simple, most of the clientele were in suits and dresses that Dieter saw. Soft guitar music played in the background, he closed his eyes as he waited curious who they might have matched him with based on what he asked for.

Dieter heard the clicking of heels first. Then smelled a deep woodsy fragrance, it approached slowly, matching the pace of the heels. They stopped in front of him and he caught hints of citrus and a flower. Using his aquiline nose to sniff closer to the source, feeling body heat radiating from whoever was in front of him. “It’s faint but you smell like a sweet pea.” He released a deep breath he’d been building from taking in and trying to identify the different components of their scent.

“Welcome Mr. Bravo. I hope my fragrance invokes pleasant memories. I’m told you want to rid yourself of sorrow. Correct?” The voice embraced him as soft fingers coiled around his neck, thumbs pressing into his chin.

“Yes, please. I need to forget, just for a bit. Then I might be able to get my body to function properly. Everything is fine, great even.” He kept his eyes closed and he felt them. Lips on his forehead, warm and plush. They lingered, “Can I touch you, please?” No answer was given as hands left his neck and were placed on each side of a torso. His palms roamed slowly tracing the lace that wrapped the body he had in his hands.

The lips left his forehead and he was tempted to reach for them, but kept his eyes closed, he would wait, trying to keep his breathing even. “Is this alright Mr. Bravo or do you want someone who might-“Dieter wildly shook his head.

“Don’t you go anywhere Sweet Pea. Stay right here with me. Just like this. Maybe more. Can I look at you?” He pulled the body toward him, sniffing more. “Call me Dieter. Mr. Bravo is the one having issues with his little D.” He made himself chuckle knowing what a stupid joke it was. Fingertips graced his cheek and tipped his chin upward.

“Look at me Dieter. How do you want me to drown your sorrows tonight? I usually go by Violet due to the room, but I like Sweet Pea when you say it. It makes me sound cute.” The giggle from this celestial being has Dieter wondering if she’ll still giggle if he’s buried between her legs. He wouldn’t need to come up for air, just search for what would be his reward: her moans and his tongue squeezed by her pelvic muscles. His palms ran around to her back, feeling the different rolls of her body.

“I want to see if I’m going to go into a coma from drowning in your nectar Sweet Pea. Can I be your first casualty? If I was going to go, I’d want to be surrounded by thick thighs and a woman’s cries I offer her.” Slipping her left heel off, Sweet Pea places her leg on the bed beside Dieter’s right leg. His hand slowly makes its way across the curve of her wide ass to her thigh, his large fingers dipping into the small holes of the fishnets, tugging on them. “Let me show you gorgeous.”

Smiling, Sweet Pea gives his lips a quick peck before bending to reach between his legs, “Seems just the thought is enough Dieter. Why come to me? I’m sure you’ve got many offers, especially if you’re asking like that.” She lowers her leg and stands back up, turning her back to him but looking over her shoulder to meet his eyes. The glint in them makes her lick her lips, she could ask him to do it, just to see if he will. Given how desperate he is, he might. He won’t say it, but his body betrays him, he said that ‘little D’ was having trouble but that didn’t seem to be the case at all from what she felt. Maybe it’s the scents, the atmosphere and that what happens here will remain here until he comes back. She crosses the room and drops her black thong, stepping out of it and her other heel, sitting on a violet velvet loveseat with her legs open wide. “This is what you want right Dieter?” Her elbows are on her knees with one hand beckoning him. “Come to me, but undress and crawl.”

Bravo doesn’t want control right now, nor does he want to think. He just wants to act, to perform. In this moment, he isn’t thinking about how lonely he is or how his career could crumble on some whim of culture or random video. There’s only this purple room he can melt into as he removes his clothes, making himself bare to Sweet Pea. Dieter’s actually hard, dripping onto her carpet as he lowers himself onto the floor on all fours. His knees are burning as he makes his way across the padded carpet. It’s worth his goal though, into her tender folds. “You like to see a man work, huh Sweet Pea? That’s more than fine.” Halfway there, his bobbing swollen cock made a mess of the carpet and his belly. Upon reaching her, he placed his hands on her knees and looked up to her, balancing himself on his knees so little D was at full attention. He wanted to show her what she’d been able to bring out of him so far. Something changed though, he was smiling but Violet recognized it. She used her fingers to rub circles into his biceps and shoulders before tracing the pronounced vein on his neck.

“You adorable man. This isn’t what you want. At least not now. You can’t seem to decide between the two Dieter.” Fingers run through his hair, and he knows she’s right but couldn’t she had said so after he’d had his fill, hear her cries?

“You’re not wrong, but I still need this. Need you.” He dipped his head to nibble on her thigh and she hummed but pushed his head back. In standing, she also helped him to his feet and brought him back to the bed, removing her lace corset and climbed on the bed.

“From behind, I’m not going to have your tears dripping where I can watch while you fuck me.” Now Sweet Pea was on all fours and Dieter’s sorrow returned. It was inescapable, but he wanted to see her face. He could block it off, just for a short while he tried to get the sunshine.

“No, I need to see how your face changes as you take me.” Crawling across the bed behind her, he pulled her back flush to his chest and turned her chin over her shoulder, capturing her lips. Slipping his tongue in, the warmth felt good. He hadn’t had it in months, he didn’t know why now, in this place with her, but he’d accept it. All of it. “Pleasure to mask my sorrow is why I’m here, Sweet Pea. Have me bask in the sun.”

Their kiss broke as Sweet Pea turned to put her arms around his shoulders, kissing his forehead once again as Dieter laid back on the bed, she fell forward as he took her hair out of the high ponytail it had been in. Her hair fell around her face, her wet folds grazed his shaft and he moaned. “I’ll be your dawn until the light shines on you Dieter.”

Coming unbound, feeling elated and devastated when he had to leave, Dieter had been able to bury his sorrow in pleasure for a time. Another appointment was made for later in the week. To quote Bravo, “I’ll deny me none while I’m allowed because I wouldn’t fare well.”

Bad ideas that Dieter could use: @katw474 @readingiskeepingmegoing @angelofsmalldeath-codeine @megamindsecretlair @pamasaur @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin @sp00kymulderr @mysterious-moonstruck-musings @titlee78 @tinytinymenace @magpiepillsjunior @soft-girl-musings @morallyinept @rhoorl @survivingandenduring @missladym1981 @yorksgirl @heareball @laurfilijames @maggiemayhemnj

#pedro pascal characters #fanfiction #pedro pascal #pedro pascal fanfiction #dieter bravo fics #dieter bravo fanfic #dieter bravo fanfiction #dieter bravo #dieter bravo smut #dieter bravo x plus size reader #hozier songs #Hozier Song Drabble Challenge #Gin made me do it #a Nerdie fic

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violetsandshrikes · 2 years ago

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Since sharing this post about a usful AI used to compile and graph research papers, I've realised I have a few other resources I can share with people!

Note: I haven't had a chance to use every single one of these. A group of post-grad students has been slowly compiling an online list, and these are some I've picked out that are free (or should be free and also have paid versions). However, other students using them have all verified them as safe.

Inciteful (Using Citations to Explore Academic Literature | Inciteful.xyz) – similar to connectedpapers + researchrabbit. Also allows you to connect two papers and see how they are linked. Currently free.

Spinbot (Spinbot - Article Spinning, Text Rewriting, Content Creation Tool.) – article spinner + paraphraser. Useful for difficult articles/papers. Currently free (ad version).

Elicit (Elicit: The AI Research Assistant) – AI research assistant, creates workflow. Mainly for lit reviews. Finds relevant papers, summarises + analyses them, finds criticism of them. Free (?)

Natural Reader (AI Voices - NaturalReader Home (naturalreaders.com)) – text to speech. Native speakers. Usually pretty reliable, grain of salt. Free + paid versions.

Otter AI (Otter.ai - Voice Meeting Notes & Real-time Transcription) – takes notes and transcribes video calls. Pretty accurate. Warn people Otter is entering call or it is terrifying. Free + paid versions.

Paper Panda (🐼 PaperPanda — Access millions of research papers in one click) – get research papers free. Chrome extension. Free.

Docsity (About us - Docsity Corporate) – get documents from university students globally. Useful for notes.

Desmos (Desmos | Let's learn together.) – online free graphing calculator. Free (?)

Core (CORE – Aggregating the world’s open access research papers) – open access research paper aggregation.

Writefull (Writefull X: AI applied to academic writing) – Academic AI. Paraphrasing, title generator, abstract generator, apparently ChatGPT detector now. Free.

Photopea (Photopea | Online Photo Editor) – Photoshop copy but run free and online. Same tools. Free.

Draw IO (Flowchart Maker & Online Diagram Software) – Flowchart/diagram maker. Free + paid versions.

Weava (Weava Highlighter - Free Research Tool for PDFs & Webpages (weavatools.com)) – Highlight + annotate webpages and pdfs. Free + paid versions.

Unsplash (Beautiful Free Images & Pictures | Unsplash) – free to use images.

Storyset (Storyset | Customize, animate and download illustration for free) – open source illustrations. Free.

Undraw (unDraw - Open source illustrations for any idea) – open source illustrations. Free.

8mb Video (8mb.video: online compressor FREE) – video compression (to under 8mb). Free.

Just Beam It (JustBeamIt - file transfer made easy) – basically airdrop files quickly and easily between devices. Free.

Jimpl (Online photo metadata and EXIF data viewer | Jimpl) – upload photos to see metadata. Can also remove metadata from images to obscure sensitive information. Free.

TL Draw (tldraw) – web drawing application. Free.

Have I Been Pwned (Have I Been Pwned: Check if your email has been compromised in a data breach) – lets you know if information has been taken in a data breach. If so, change passwords. Free.

If you guys have any feedback about these sites (good or bad), feel free to add on in reblogs or flick me a message and I can add! Same thing with any broken links or additions.

#free resources #academia #<- tag i was originally using for this stuff #useful websites #katie rambles

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grayzeppelin281 · 9 months ago

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Kung Fu Panda 4 Review, by GrayZeppelin

Eight years later.

2016 to 2024

It is so good to see the Dragon Warrior again after eight years, willing to anticipate what Po has been up to after General Kai's defeat. This review contains spoilers, so I hope most of the audience watched the film like me, and I would like to share my opinions about Kung Fu Panda 4. For those who have not seen it, I suggest you look away immediately! Otherwise, if you want to know what the big deal is about, then knock yourself out.

Now, depending on the taste of what I watched, I will list the likes and flaws that caught my eye. Okay, here it goes.

— It's so good to be home.

The first thirty minutes of it feel like you have returned to the Valley of Peace, seeing your old friends again. From there, with a slight disappointment, that would have had the film include the tale with old school side characters who are now absent — The Furious Five. After Po clarifies with the fans in the Valley of Peace, we understand that the Five began to do their missions (each one) despite the film needing to expand new characters in the play.

Okay. New characters! I'll mention the fox Zhen and the sorceress villain, the Chameleon.

— First things first. The Hall of Heroes update.

The corsac fox blending in the Jade Palace is an interesting one, which she was from being a thief as Zhen could do the stealing skills for a living. We get to see her in the Jade Palace stealing the antiques at the Hall of Heroes, where you can see a few statues you remember old characters from the past three films (my favorite one is Master Storming Ox). One of the items that I did not leave my eyes on is the weapon I recognized from the first film, where Tai Lung kicked the sword, and Shifu caught it and sent the blade to the marble floor — the Dagger of Deng Wa.

(Drags! There's our favorite weapon right in front of our noses the whole damn time! Holy shit!)

I wrote my fanfic about the blade that, in my version, served with evil creatures past by the badger sorcerer whom I named Deng Wa, using the ancient weapon (dagger-ax) from the old dynasty as if the blade passed through generations forged into different ones before a wielder before the last made one character that turned on his brother to despise Oogway — my favorite villain General Kai, who deserves more attention than Tai Lung and Lord Shen.

— My favorite pot is there! The Urn of Whispering Warriors!

(And for the love of spirits, guys! Give Tenshu and his pack a break, will you?! Gosh dang it!)

Okay. I wrote lore from my fic series about the wolves who served with the warlord Tenshu before he and his army of a thousand men defeated the horde of darkness before many fell. All of whom they died fighting returned with a vengeance to vanquish every foe before the rest of the souls were freed and went to the Spirit Realm; only nine wolves stayed with their souls cremated in the pot that Tenshu wished for him and his pack to be summoned once more when needed. The rest of the tale will be put to the side as I am off-topic and should write about KFP 4.

— Now, where was I? Oh, yes! Zhen.

The fox looked great, indeed, but the character would have gotten much more into deep complexities. The story briefly shows her past life as a thief for years because Zhen had no other choice but to starve or steal yuans for food to survive. Zhen's background story needs to explain further what caused her to be the only child without her parents. What exactly happened to them? What made her obey with the Chameleon?

Alright. I have too many thoughts about the new villain. Amanda Waller! I mean. . . The Chameleon! Oh, my. A shape-shifting sorceress who can turn into any form, like the old bad guys from the past three movies? Whoa. . . This shape-shifting trick sounds like Po would have been scared to see the old enemies again when the sorceress could have gotten her advantage and terrorized him.

— Three villains (The Trinity)

I loved seeing Tai Lung, Lord Shen, and General Kai return, so I witnessed their arrival before the Spirit Warriors. (To be honest, I praised the Jade Slayer's return because he remains the underrated character throughout the franchise.) Now, if you hope villains will have a reunion, your expectations will not be that hopeful, even if you want to anticipate the impacts with familiar characters. Let me explain.

Did you expect Tai Lung to come back? That's good for you because his appearance is nostalgic, which, in my experience, being an old KFP fan for years, has made me miss Tai Lung since 2008. There is a slight redemption for him as if you would like to know if he admitted that Oogway was right about Po as the Dragon Warrior. It was good to see him again, but his redemption arc was not satisfying after the film. Shifu would have known about his son's arrival at that time but often stayed at Jade Palace and waited for Po to choose his new successor. Quite a bummer if you would have loved to see them two reunited, but those damages will occur to them after Tai Lung was rejected, fragmenting Tai Lung's core into a thousand pieces. But I am sure he now lives in the Spirit Realm and no longer mind the title.

Did you expect Lord Shen and General Kai's return? Great, but there are significant disappointments. One: They don't speak. And two: They briefly appear like a minute or more. These two would have gotten more meaning when Lord Shen could have spoken to Po about the last time the panda mentioned the past to let go, and Kai would have talked before seeing Po as a respectable warrior. I would have wished the three dead villains to do something for Po by defeating the Chameleon as a team. Otherwise, I am certain a few of you would like me to see what they could do — similar to the No Way Home reference.

— Bow controversy.

The bow part could have been better for the three villains to speak with Po. With this scene, knowing that there is much fuss about only one thing that bothers many, I am concerned about what many of you thought about Shen, who "bowed" him. How could Li Shan celebrate his son's victory while the peacock was down there? Why did the scene not show Li's reaction to seeing Lord Shen alive (but still dead)? As an old KFP fan, this felt strangely like an insult because many pandas were taken and executed, but most of them, like Li, survived the genocide. This part must explain why the late Lord Shen bestowed Po for a good reason. Could Oogway or other dead masters like Master Thundering Rhino prove him about Po? What exactly did Shen become the "Spirit Warrior" after being crushed to death by his cannon — the Kung Fu killer? How could the honorable dead warriors allow the genocidal peacock lord to be in the Spirit Realm after he murdered Master Thundering Rhino?

If, by any means, wanting to bring back Shen (which a few people loved, but not for everyone), DreamWorks better have a good reason for him to be there. If it were redemption, that would be a big no-no after what he did to the pandas. Us fanfic writers love bringing him back (I am hoping to decide what to do with Shen finishing his arc from my series in the meantime), but as the same goes for whatever reason you want him in your story, ask yourself about it. If it is before or during KFP 2, you could do it. If he is dead, and you plan to resurrect him from the dead, writing his next arc is tricky and beyond complications.

Most of his former army of wolves would know if Shen appeared but thank the heavens because neither emerged. I would have wanted to see Wolf Boss in Juniper City for whatever he could do for work or a change of heart if Po recognized him right away somewhere in one of the alleyways. Or Soothsayer, because she only appeared in Gongmen City the last time. A little reunion thing for Shen could have been shown, but that would never have happened either way because I think, in my theory, Soothsayer is in the Spirit Realm with him and his late parents.

— Okay. About the new villain.

I liked the Chameleon. Her appearance is marvelous, her size being "small" before she could shift to any form. I have to spill the beans about her villainous role, which most of you know about the character's lack of depth. Compared to what General Kai was capable of, to claim qi from all the masters, we know she wanted to steal their skills to dominate the Realm as she did to the old foes before the Spirit Warriors. There's a major downside to that one. Tai Lung, Lord Shen, and General Kai have their tragic backstories; she does not have one. The only lack of writing is where Chameleon talks to Po about temples. She tried to be a student, but no one wanted her because she was small.

Small? Are you effing kidding me? Would you like to have a therapy and talk with Mantis about it? Because I do not doubt that anyone can become a kung fu master of any size. Where in the heck did that lazy writing come from?

If she was that small but refused to be a kung fu master, where is her backstory? Where did it end her from a curious character to a villainous sorceress? This story could have shown what exactly happened to the Chameleon; her reason for not being accepted made her turn against those who did not want her in the first place before advancing her way to steal every master's skill. A villain without a background story is a red flag right there.

I found a video for the Chameleon to fix her character as a tragic one. She deserves more screen time and digging into her past. Write this writing lesson suggestion.

Every villain needs a background story. PERIOD.

youtube

Look at what happened to three baddies. And hey! Look at what happened to Zuko from Avatar: The Last Airbender (animation one)! I would really love to write about that, but it will take thousands of words for me to convince you why you should care about Zuko. Mostly, everyone knows about him, and we feel bad to see Zuko as a broken prince!

— Fathers!!

Oh yes. Mr. Ping and Li Shan! The good old-timers who look after their son Po. Every parent's job is to ensure nothing happens to the child, and we all see what Li and Ping are worried about Po. They go to him because it is the right thing for fathers to protect their son. While many try to kill off Po, Mr. Ping and Li Shan will be the ones who die while protecting him. Talk about the fathers of the year!

They did not die, so good heavens. Li Shan remains improving as a fighter but still has much time to enhance. As for Mr. Ping, you know he would do better to ensure Po is safe and always be there with him and Li Shan. They would have gotten a Double-Dad Defense scenario when dressing up the armor.

— Kung Fu fighting.

I like it a lot. Lots of flows we saw. There is no further explanation after we saw the awesomeness and Chameleon's shape-shifting abilities to mimic every master's skills. Wolf bite! OWW! That's gonna leave a mark. Now, Po is a victim of his butt being bitten. Ask Marty from Madagascar. He has a story about it.

— Peach seed.

Oh, my. I had high expectations to see what would happen to Grandmaster Shifu. I almost predicted it as far as many of us would see him disappear as Oogway did. I remember feeling nostalgic when I saw Shifu give Po a peach seed, which reminded me of Oogway's farewell. Well. . . Maybe KFP 5 will happen to Shifu? Who knows?

If only DreamWorks leads in the right direction where Po will be in charge of defending the Realm as the Spiritual Leader while Zhen takes the role as the new Dragon Warrior, The Furious Five deserve more screentime because we care about side characters, not wasteful, not ignored. Since you made Puss in Boots doing his thing, why won't you create a story about the Furious Five if they are absent from KFP 4? If you are making another villain, please create the background story to make more sense instead of plot holes one stone at a time. Do better. Returning old villains was good, but it felt like bait to see Tai Lung speak and fight back, and Lord Shen and General Kai did not, especially not doing anything at all.

Sighs.

The Valley of Peace had more buildings. What exactly happened to not replicating those in the past three films? Budget wise.

Last but not least!

— Stingray!

I am concerned about what comes next to see dolphins in the future (which I hope not) after the Stingray becomes the first aqua mammal to appear. I'll give it an average. It's likable, but I am confused at the same time.

A few jokes are great, but does comedy need to be there? 70 percent comedy? There are good ones and some flaws, and a few serious scenes don't need to put laughing moments to lighten up. Since KFP 2, there has been comedy halfway through, and dark moments have taken over, thanks to Shen. KFP 4 should have gotten that opportunity for Chameleon to be the serious one instead of pushing someone to the stairs. She would have done something worse instead of being a joke. I love the Chameleon, but the writing is. . .

I am lost at it.

I will give the film a fair 6/10.

KFP 4 should have used 2 to 3 hours if you are fleshing out most possibilities. Like dead old foes to do something rather than doing nothing and wasting their arc (Tai Lung deserves redemption because he believes Oogway is right about Po. Kai should deserve more after accepting his defeat and would have hung out with Oogway in the Spirit Realm, teasing each other like in the old times. What about Shen? Perhaps not, but he would do some favors for Po. The peacock's redemption arc is unnecessary). The Chameleon would have gotten her background story to expand because it was a crime not to show her beginning before she became a sorceress. Put a 2-D reference to fill her tragic story about her. Make the audience care more about the characters and the story instead of rushing and leaving plot holes. Zhen? Of course. Show us why we care about her when she becomes Po's friend.

One last thing. As if the film has changed for children and the new generation to like it, Kung Fu Panda remains for all ages, old and young. As an old fan of Kung Fu Panda since 2008, I will unveil my first feeling after the first time I saw Kung Fu Panda 4, with all the high expectations going downhill to the grave.

"Disappointed."

That is all I have to write about that.

(I'll be turning off the notifications, so don't bother nudging me because I am mostly inactive here on Tumblr.)

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nikox400x · 10 months ago

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KFP 4: The true hell behind the cameras ft. The Co-director of KFP4

I know I already made my review to this thing, and believe me when I say that I didn't want to talk anymore about this dawn movie (For call it something). But the reason for this statement is something that I cannot ignore, so hold on to your seat because what you are going to read is not a mission impossible movie, this really happened in the same Dreamworks studios.

The devil has different names depending on the religion;

-In the Catholic religion he is called Satan.

-In Islam he's Iblís.

-In Buddhism it's Mara.

But in the world of kung fu panda, the devil has a human name, Mike Mitchell.

Context? Three days ago, as a result of all the protests about the poor narrative quality of the film, the KFP's reddit community was able to find someone from within the production of the film, a witness who could corroborate everything that we assumed was happening within that studio.

This person is no one else but the co-director of kfp4, Stephanie Ma Stine. One of the main people who, along with a large part of the team of animators who love this saga too, fought and fought throughout the production so that the film was not completely destroyed from the beginning.

This woman was contacted by a discord channel to answer some questions that the community was asking in the company of the administrators of the discord group of the kung fu panda fandom, at first this woman seemed frustrated by something that I am going to explain, The entire conversation was recorded and uploaded to YouTube to expose the nauseating experience that Stephanie had to endure during the production of this film.

To begin with, she had almost no power within the production because she was considered someone new to her job and the disgusting bosses at Dreamworks had no better idea than to give all creative control to Mike.

Dreamworks gave a time limit for the duration of the film, later you will know why. This guy didn't have the slightest idea how to direct such a short movie, much less if it was a kung fu panda movie, since the guy treated kung fu panda like a chinese version of the minions, obviously because he didn't give a shit about franchise and he just wanted something that would make people laugh (But his humor and the scriptwriters's was so bad that even it would insult ilumination itself) although not even the children could find this humor funny.

What kind of humor? Well, you know; fart humor, jokes with a childish tone, random chases that contribute nothing to the plot, jokes about annoying and invincible children, jokes without charisma, generation Z humor, random hits, etc...

And like any sane person would do, Stephanie tried to give it that serious but parodic and heartfelt tone that the first triology had, but obviously they barely listened to her because she was considered new. So she had to resort to encouraging people passionate about the saga within the studio to insist on adding things that would improve the plot. Most of the time when they insisted on improving the quality of the script it ended in a roll of eyes from the higher ups within the production as if trying to tell them; "Damn stupid people, so much bother for a children's saga that is only used to make easy money"

The problem transcended for a long time as more and more absurd ideas came out of the writing team, some of them that even destroyed the logic of the world they were building, all of this was translated into a long and nightmarish trench war between those who love the saga and the psychopaths who only cared about money.

So, what happened next? Well, the movie came out and fans (and non-fans) were disappointed because the movie seems like a draft made by people who didn't seem to speak the same language during the artistic decisiones in the movie. Exactly, because of all this conflict between those who agreed with Stephanie and those who listened to Mike.

And in the end, it was Stephanie who had to politely come forward in front of the disappointed people to give these professionally humiliating explanations, and what did Mike do on his part? Bury his head like an ostrich and do not listen to the criticism that he generated for their horrible decisions.

youtube

(Stephanie's user is called storyduke)

This is the conversation between her and the administrators of the discord group, pause the video calmly and read on your own if you need it, for prove I haven't invented anything of this to defame Mike or something like this. All this comes from the person who was by his side during all production.

In order not to overwhelm you because the video is very long, I leave you a summary of what she said below. I will mainly use the comment of this reddit user called Mystic3012 who explains all this quite well (My comments will be marked in red):

Early on, KFP4 was considered to be live action-animation hybrid, and featured humans (WTF?!). I posted concept art of the human Chameleon (then, The Collector, even though we already have Kai the Collector) vs Po. Seems like Zhen would've been human too. They'd have come from Hu-man City (Wow, how originally -_-), apparently... To add insult to injury, one of these versions had Po, the protagonist, stuck in a BOX for 20 MINUTES. (20 minutes... no words for this. And no, you're not reading wrong, HUMANS IN KUNG FU PANDA. If it hadn't been for Stephanie, this is what they would have given us. Thanks Stephanie, guys)

Mike Mitchell, the director, had total creative freedom. Hence, him + the studio leadership wanting laughs and a more joke-y vibe led to the overall tone, like the F5's comical side missions. Jack Black called him the "comedy guy"(I want to think jack Black is another victim here and he simply couldn't do nothing because his contract does not allow it), while Stephanie brought "things deeper" and "more heart".

Additionally, it was Mitchell who insisted against fleshing out the Chameleon's backstory "What a surprise...right guys?". Apparently, Chameleon and Zhen had ZERO backstory in early versions. By the time the crew pushed him enough to change his mind, they were too far along in animating to add anything but the Chameleon's few lines.

The runtime was a studio mandate since they believed children can't watch a longer film + maximize profits (You motherfu...).

TV shows are non-canon, as they are under separate film and television divisions that are "rivals".

Lord Shen, General Kai, and the Furious Five were VERY last minute additions to the point that their animation rigs were "made of sticks and glue"(The 3D models were so poorly made due to lack of time that if they made original animations, they would directly break, they had to reuse animations from the first, second, third movie and from the Christmas short for the credits. The animations of Crane and Shen's feathers, according to her, were bugged a lot and the wings tended to separate from the body or bend in unrealistic ways during animation tests). Hence, no plot relevance (e.g. not redeemed properly) and inability to bring back their actors, as much as some of the crew advocated for their return. Furthermore, there's a thing where actors are brought in for voice roles with X amount of money, and exponential increases for sequels. Apparently, a single line from Jolie would've cost $20 million (Easy Angelina!! XD. They could have simply changed the actress who played her like for example the one who play her in Secrets of the Scroll or the one of Legend of Awessomless, this was simply used as an excuse not to add them to the film), so you can imagine why the Five were absent...

Not everyone who dies goes to the Spirit Realm. It's not a definite rule behind-the-scenes, but it's vaguely agreed upon that only kung fu practitioners can pass on. It was also Mitchell's idea that all 3 villains were indeed sent to the Realm and that the Chameleon only wanted master VILLAINS summoned. [Pretty sure that retcons Lord Shen but alas-]

Pelican is named Chip, and a female. The fish in her beak is Fish.

Calvin Tsang, Head of Story, directed "a short film for KFP 4". Though, DreamWorks gave him a low budget but apparently he pulled enough favours for it to work out, with Stephanie describing it as "amazing, seriously" and shows "how strong of a director's voice he has".

Future spin-offs uncertain. DreamWorks has dissolved most, if not all, of its TV division.

Though, Mitchell was very vocal about a F5 spinoff. Execs are aware of the fans' demand for it (Wow thank you...-_-, just don't ruin it again).

Shifu's staff lacks its golden piece since it has been repaired following his mastery of Chi, per production designer Paul Duncan. (Same man responsible for bringing back the Dagger of Deng Wa with his attention to detail) (Niceee)

Universal mandated for a tentpole film like KFP4 to have "stars" hired for voicework.

For the record, Stephanie wanted for KFP4 to "stay truer to KFP1 and KFP 2" but was dismissed as a nobody by the crew (Basically what I said before, Mike and a good part of his team are anything but respectful of other people's works).

Case in point, she wanted Tai Lung being brought back to be done right. She pitched for Po/Shifu to have a vision of the Chameleon kidnapping Shifu, prompting Po to go on a quest to stop her. Shifu gets kidnapped anyway due to the Chameleon's manipulations, and he's hence present to say goodbye to Tai Lung. The execs loved it but "someone axed it" (That person better not know their identity because the fans cling to Tai Lung, I don't think they'll laugh much at this 😅). For those who've seen the film, the vision was reduced to Po's dream enroute to Juniper City.

Another example of Stephanie's intervention, she fought for Zhen to be redeemed ONSCREEN after betraying Po, much to the writers' refusal (These people don't even respect their own characters). She was supposed to swoop in out of nowhere to fight the Chameleon for a bit and disappears quickly again. She also ensured that her redemption scene wasn't just dialogue and had action going on. (She admits to Po and Zhen's underbaked relationship not supplementing this scene enough though.)

The writers seemed to HATE comments "poking holes at the story" (And then what do they want us to call that; "purposely destroy the canon of history because of its inaccuracy?" On top of bad in their own job, they're crybabies).

Zhen is a Corsac Fox as its the Asian fox with distinctive facial features.

Nico Marlet, renowned concept artist, only worked on the film for a week, left, and refused to come back (I don't even know if I want to know why, just imagine it).

Many crewmembers pitched ideas for Zhen's family's backstory but all were discarded (They can't even develop their own character, I'll call that technique "Work? What is that? it is eatable? XD").

By the way, the thing about humans was no joke.

(Conceptual art made by Luca Pisanu)

Original reddit forum:

Guys, that's it, how not to write a movie. I think you can already imagine my opinion, it is a complete shame what they tried to do with this saga but at least she was able to save it from being completely ruined. I sincerely ask you all to spread this information, I will leave you a link to the original reddit thread for your inspection. And I'm just saying one thing: I hope they fire Mike Mitchell and all his damn inept scriptwriters, and I hope we never see them again in another production of this saga. And of course, to the executives at Dreamworks: Stick your finger up your ass and don't touch what you don't know how to touch.

Don't be silent about these things, because you know what will happen? That they will do the same thing again with the fifth film because they see that the method works, in addition to the fact that they will also exploit their workers for nothing for such a mediocre product (Because yes, they also exploited them to finish the finale on time). Let this not happen again guys, please I ask you.

#kung fu panda #dreamworks #kung fu panda 4 #notmykfp4 #mike mitchell #Youtube

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themerrypanda · 2 years ago

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2022 Fanfic Review

(I was a little busy with the last few weeks of the year. Better late than never lol)

Number of stories posted (to AO3): 29 (plus 4 Stardew Valley fics since last year)

Published word count: All time: 239,748. Year 2022: 43,460. (Another 3,952 words can be added to both for fics published exclusively to Discord for now.)

2022 fic-writing goal: Publish at least ten more chapters of Rusalka before 2023.

Met? No, but eight out of ten chapters published isn’t too bad.

Fandoms written for this year: Stardew Valley and Fire Emblem: Three Houses (no big surprise).

First fandom ever written for: Darkwing Duck, written over ten years ago and before I knew it had a fandom.

How many kudos total received this year: 180 (565 from 2021, 292 from 2020, and 157 from 2019, a total of 1,194 since starting in 2019).

Work with the most hits: Rusalka (FE3H) with 3,493 hits and Dinner Date (Stardew Valley) with 2,181 hits.

Work with the most comments: Rusalka (FE3H) with 41 comments, followed by I Was Your Man (Stardew Valley) with 8.

Most popular stories (this should be top five by kudos/likes, but to cover a work written this year, AO3′s top five, and the top five Stardew fics (across both sites), it’s a top eight this year):

That Summer, That Night (Stardew Valley) with 88 kudos and 139 likes.

Always. For All Time. (Loki TV Show) with 157 kudos.

Luau Mayhem (Stardew Valley) with 49 kudos and 82 likes.

Dinner Date (Stardew Valley) with 107 AO3 kudos and 20 Tumblr likes.

Rusalka (FE3H) with 96 AO3 kudos and 7 Tumblr-snippet likes.

Dearest Companion (FE3H) with 91 kudos and 8 likes.

I Guess That’s Why They Call It The Blues (Stardew Valley) with 22 kudos and 70 likes.

Home (Stardew Valley) with 28 kudos and 61 likes.

Quickest work to write: I Was Your Man (Stardew Valley), probably four days for writing and editing.

Longest work to write: Rusalka (FE3H), 29 months and counting lol.

Longest work of the year: Rusalka (FE3H) even with just the 35k words published this year, followed by As Ships Sailing Past At Night (Stardew Valley) at 3.8k words.

Shortest work of the year: I Was Your Man (Stardew Valley) at 1.5k words. From all time: Our Friend Linus (Stardew Valley) at 666 words. Of FE3H’s all time: Until The Bitter End at 1.8k words.

Work I am most proud of (regardless of hits/kudos): I Guess That’s Why They Call It The Blues (Stardew Valley) and Rusalka (FE3H).

Work with more feedback than expected: I Was Your Man (Stardew Valley). It turns out, lots of people like a girlboss-Marnie and Lewis-getting-what-he-deserves fic.

Pairing written the most for this year: Ferdinand/Dorothea (FE3H) and Harvey / a farmer OC (Stardew Valley). No new pairings this year beyond a brief Marnie/Marlon (Stardew Valley).

Favorite pairing written for this year: To my surprise, Seteth/Manuela (FE3H).

A pairing I wish to explore next year: Sebastian/Abigail and Harvey/my OC Kim (Stardew Valley), followed by Claude/Hilda (FE3H) if by some miracle I get around to it. Honorary mention to Twilight/Yor (Spy X Family) which I adore, but might not write.

Number of WIPs in docs for next year: At least five.

Rusalka (FE3H)

Thirteen Meetings (FE3H)

That Summer That Night Chapters 5-6 (Stardew Valley)

When You Come Back To Me Again (Stardew Valley)

Harvey/OC Kim story (Stardew Valley)

Favorite character to write this year: Hmm... Maru? (Stardew Valley). Ferdinand (FE3H) has been fun too.

Character who gave the most trouble in writing this year: Any characters in my years-old unpublished WIPs lol, so primarily Kim (Stardew Valley OC) and Ignatz (FE3H).

Any collaborative works this year: No. I haven’t ever co-written a fic before.

Written any gifts this year: Two gifts for Stardew Valley, each Harvey and Farmer OC fics. The farmers are word-ghost’s Peach and elleasinwoods’s Elle.

Received any gifts this year: One art and one fic (yet to be publicly published), both for Stardew Valley.

Most common category: Gen (19), followed by F/M (11). Lots of overlap erring into Gen.

Most common “Additional Tags” tag: Platonic Relationships (occasionally followed by can be romantic). It’s a low number though.

Ever written a crossover: The closest you get is video game characters (Stardew Valley’s Maru and Sebastian) in one game experiencing another video game together (Subnautica).

Ever received hate on a fic: Nothing with great vitriol. I’ve had occasional corrections when I mistakenly used an incorrect tag or an opinion on how I should have worded an idea, but nothing rude.

Ever had a fic stolen or translated: No and no. I’d faint from shock the day someone asks to translate a fic of mine into another language.

What I listen to while writing: Nothing; I prefer quiet and isolation. Sometimes I listen to music before I write to get in the mood, but usually I find music distracting.

Artists’ songs used most (if any at all): I don’t often use song lyrics, but I did use three this year; a couple chapter titles from musicals, one short fic title from Elton John, and another short fic title from Bruno Mars.

Own work I reread the most: Rusalka (FE3H). I reread and edited earlier chapters for polishing up and the sake of getting a word count of 69,420 after publishing Chapter 16.

Favorite fic written this year: Yes??? I love all five!

Favorite title used: I Was Your Man

Favorite line/passage written this year:

I Was Your Man (Stardew Valley): ‘ “Do you, Marina Cabrera Armenta, take Marlon Ward, to be your lawfully wedded husband?” Marnie didn’t even pause to glance to see him in the crowd. Her eyes were only for Marlon. Without hesitation, she said yes. “By the power vested in me as Pelican Town’s former mayor by the Ferngill Republic, I hereby declare you, Marlon, and you, Marina, husband and wife. Dear nephew… kiss your bride already.” The others in town laughed and cheered as Marnie removed her veil and Marlon brought a hand to her cheek and they kissed tenderly. Marnie never looked so happy. This Marnie was not the one he had known, but had he ever really known her at all? And now Lewis has his whole empty retirement to ponder this. ’

Honorary mention to a Rusalka (FE3H) excerpt published this year, but first drafted in 2021: ‘ Ferdinand craned his neck to better look at her face. There was only a trace of the tears that dried on her cheek. Again, his heart ached. That is enough, he chided himself. He must not fall under the delusion that someday Dorothea may grow to love him back. The woman under his arm is not one falling in love with him. No; this was a dear friend who is simply tired, tired of facing the great challenges life relentlessly gave her. A dear friend of whom he could only dream of being more than a friend. His own feelings were not worth compromising what has slowly become a wonderful friendship. She may never return his affection, and he already learned to accept that fact. The memory of her like this would forever haunt him, like a shadow burned into his side, but that did not matter. What is most important is that she feels comforted and safe. Ferdinand shifted ever so slightly in his seat, to make himself more comfortable. He managed to resist the urge to kiss her forehead, but chanced on brushing some strands of hair from her face, gently tucking it behind her ear. Dorothea exhaled deeply, and the ghost of a smile crossed her beautiful face. Who knew that a heart could feel so heavy and yet so light at the same time? With a puff of smoke, the candle beside them went out, casting them into darkness. Ferdinand closed his eyes, and allowed himself to drift to sleep. Come what may, he would protect the queen who many years ago won his heart. ’

Biggest surprise while writing this year: I hadn’t been too greatly attached to Manuela’s character when I first started writing Rusalka, but even with the little excerpts this year building up to a bigger moment yet to be published... dang. She has excellent angst potential.

Top scenes from anywhere you would choose to have illustrated(TM): I listed two last year. The Stardew Valley one came true in the form of a gift art. The other is a now published scene of Rusalka (Chapter 16) of Ferdithea dancing together at a masquerade ball.

Story I haven’t written yet, but intend to: For Stardew Valley, a Hallmark-esque Sebastian and Abigail story in which years later for a Winter Star, Abigail returns to Pelican Town from Grampleton divorced and with a son and reconnects with Sebastian, who had moved to Zuzu City and is visiting his family for the first time in years and just after a nasty breakup.

Writing strengths: I tend to apply grammar rules correctly on the first draft. I also enjoy doing research for my writing, and I like to think it shows in my stories if you’re looking for it. Character details briefly mentioned in its canon? Referenced. Character from a culture I am less familiar with? Culture researched so I get a better idea of the character’s upbringing and how it affects their personality and thought processes. Affliction I haven’t dealt with personally? I research the symptoms from a scientific standpoint as well as testimonies from fictional and real life people.

Writing weaknesses: I like to be as canon compliant as possible. If a story has not yet ended, then it is difficult to write my own ending. At best I can think of a scene that could plausibly take place with what has been established in mind. (Sorry Twiyor!) Also, I err on being overly concise with my prose and occasionally mixing up verb tenses.

Fic-writing goal for 2023: Finish Rusalka (another ten or eleven chapters). For every Rusalka chapter not published in 2023, write and publish another short-story or a chapter of a new story from any fandom.

#panda writing review #stardew valley #fe3h #fire emblem three houses #stardew

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justanotherwriter140 · 10 months ago

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Kung Fu Panda 4 - The Movie

The last really, really long discussion post (for now).

Major spoilers ahead!

This review is full of spoilers, so please refrain from reading through it until you've watched KFP4. I would highly suggest doing so, as I want everyone to form their own opinions without my influence. The movie has its flaws (some of which admittedly being a bit distracting), but it's a fun film that has things to offer.

Kung Fu Panda 4 is a fun movie (take that as you will) that takes its audience on an action-packed, surprisingly funny, yet relatively contained adventure on which Po doesn't really do much. It's an inconsequential, safe sequel that doesn't really hurt the franchise but adds close to nothing.

I had a good time watching the movie. It was obviously produced with its theater experience in mind and the action scenes especially reflected that priority. The humor was actually funny sometimes and I enjoyed Po and Zhen's dynamic. During the film, I was able to put most (most!) of my grievances aside and take the movie for what it is. I've discovered that the best way to watch KFP4 is with low expectations and an open mind.

I have a lot of things to say about KFP4, both complaints and compliments (though the former might be taking the forefront in this review), and I hope this review can help those of you who have seen the movie organize your thoughts. I've been having a lot of trouble with that specific aspect of things myself. Those who get it get it.

With that said, let's get into my full review of KFP4! I've been waiting for nearly 2 years to write this and I'm so excited to share every single thought.

I'm going to follow the format of my first discussion post and curate a bulleted list of my thoughts, followed by an analysis of each of these points. Keep in mind that everything I say is IMO and this is more of a rant post than anything else.

Here are my main points:

The Furious Five's role is comically minuscule in the context of the film. Their actions are inconsequential and add nothing to the plot (a confirmed last-minute add), and they have 30~ seconds of screen time. Shifu is also largely irrelevant.

Mr. Ping and Li's presence has little to no effect on the movie (though I won't complain too much because they were pretty fun to watch and this movie has bigger problems). In almost any scenario, I am adamantly against having characters present that don't add anything to the narrative; however, Mr. Ping is an exception. I love Mr. Ping. James Hong is a gem.

Zhen's screen time is not utilized well and her character is underdeveloped. She definitely wasn't annoying, but I didn't find her either compelling or funny enough to warrant the screen time she was given, especially considering it wasn't used to establish a backstory/strong motives. This makes me feel bad for the character because the movie kind of screwed her out of any substantial development.

The Chameleon, while complimented greatly by Viola Davis, is an underwhelming villain. Viola Davis is amazing in this film and I would suggest watching it for her performance if for nothing else, but the Chameleon is underwhelming considering the super cool concept behind the character.

The film feels very rushed. Apologies to those who disagree, but I think the pacing is atrocious and the final fight is anticlimactic. The movie felt like a word-vomit with no discernible intermissions that stops abruptly when the film ends.

I felt as though Po didn't change/grow as a person and the audience never had a chance to either bond with or relate to his character. His internal struggle is kept to a minimum and we don't spend a moment alone with him as an audience, which is disorienting and distracting. Watching the film felt like running into an old friend at the store who's too in a rush to have a real conversation.

The action scenes were strong with few exceptions. Creative art direction was utilized and I thought the martial arts choreography was entertaining and dynamic. I love the color palette of the film and many scenes were very impressive visually.

With my main points established, I do believe it's ranting time. Strap in, folks.

Let's start strong with the Furious Five: I'm gutted. Chagrined, despondent, crestfallen, etc.

The lack of the Furious Five negatively affects KFP4 so much, because not only does their absence hurt the atmospheric integrity of KFP as a franchise, it also forces KFP4 to bring in a slew of different characters—all while still noncommittally including the FF at the very end because I believe the marketing team required it—that clog up the cast a bit. It all goes to show how important strong, established side characters are.

The Furious Five are side characters, but the role of "side character" does not equate to being irrelevant, expendable, or exchangeable. I recognize that the Furious Five aren't super developed as characters beyond a handful of lines that allude to traits sprinkled sparingly among the members; however, I believe that the tiny bits of development we have been given have proved impactful in the past. Tigress's development in KFP2 is a prime example of how much narratively conscious changes (however small they may be) can positively affect these movies.

Because of limited runtimes, the Furious Five often operate as more of a singular unit than five individuals. Even so, I don't think discarding them is valid. They're so important to the KFP universe (to Po's universe!) and not having them with him feels so wrong. The Furious Five are fully integral to the heart of Kung Fu Panda, which is why I believe a lot of those who have seen the new movie have expressed something feeling "off" or something being missing.

I agree with this sentiment. To me, KFP4 didn't feel like a KFP movie. I don't need a Furious Five spin-off movie and I can be fully content with a KFP5 centered around Po's journey as an individual as was intended from the beginning, but he can't carry an entire movie on his back. As strong as he is in every sense of the word, he is only one character. He's the centerpiece of the franchise, but a centerpiece can only go so far without the rest of the design, so to speak.

For me, the Furious Five's absence is one of this film's biggest faults. It's huge and glaring. I know I'm not the only one who feels this way, either, because the friends with whom I saw the film refused to talk about any other aspect of the movie after seeing it. Seeing them at the end was better than nothing, of course, but it was a disappointing culmination after eight years of waiting.

That all is to say I feel robbed. Despite all of this, though, I understand that there were reasons why the Furious Five weren't included in the movie. I don't believe the production team would exclude the Furious Five unless they weren't given a choice.

Shifu and Po's dynamic continues to be thoroughly delightful but their interactions are short and simplified. I would have loved to see more of them in this film, especially considering the extreme relevance of teacher-student relationships in KFP4. I (somewhat) digress, though, because the idea of Shifu having to live at the Jade Palace with only Po for an extended period of time is hilarious enough on its own. Maybe that's what the short film is about!

The comedy is odd but has some jokes that stand out. Po maintains a healthy relationship with his inner sass, which I think makes him more fun to watch and kind of eradicates the man-child verdict. Some jokes don't land, of course, but I genuinely thought KFP4 had some funny moments. Mr. Ping was consistently awesome and Po had some good lines sprinkled throughout the film.

As for Mr. Ping, he and Li Shan are the subjects of the film's B-plot as they follow Po to Juniper City out of shared concern for their son's safety. In my mind, they don't add anything to the story that couldn't have been brought about by other characters, but they had their moments of being entertaining. I enjoyed their silliness and thought they had a cute dynamic if nothing else.

Speaking of other characters, I want to discuss KFP4's deuteragonist and why I genuinely feel bad about the way her character was treated.

I want to let it be known that I'm still not on board with Po passing the Dragon Warrior torch to another character. While I agree that his arc is now calling for him to have a student, I disagree with the notion of him retiring from his DW role.

As I stated in my first discussion post:

Didn’t the initial significance and nuance of the title come from the fact that there is only one person who can be the Dragon Warrior, because the concept of the “Dragon Warrior” isn’t so much a title as it is Po himself? The universe (Oogway) must choose the Dragon Warrior because they are a singular being of legend. It is one person, and that person is Po. Wasn’t the point of the first film that the title ultimately doesn’t really matter because there is no “secret ingredient,” so to speak? The title doesn’t actually give Po anything. “It’s just you,” Po says, and that was the resolution.

When it comes to Zhen as a character, contrary to what I predicted I would think of her, I thought she was okay. While I was still a bit distracted by how out-of-place her design looks, I wasn't truly annoyed by her at any point and she and Po had some cute moments. Even so, I think their relationship could have been a bit more refined and developed.

While it's evident that Po and Zhen are meant to have a teacher-student/mentor-apprentice dynamic, I think their relationship feels half-baked. There were parallels that contradicted one another and ended up being confusing come the film's conclusion, and the nature of their relationship seems to vacillate depending on the scene. Additionally, the strength of their bond goes from zero to one hundred within thirty-ish minutes and left me with a bit of whiplash.

We're shown that Po and Zhen care about one another, but we're never shown why. They have a brief conversation during which they bond over being orphans, and Zhen says at one point, "You're actually a good guy," but that's it. This obvious lack of development is a bit disorienting because we're later led to believe that Zhen and Po care very deeply for one another when there's almost nothing to back it up.

A scene that sticks out to me when discussing this is when Zhen attack-hugs Po in a way that explicitly mirrors Tigress's hug from KFP2. This happens around the beginning of the third act, and while it had the potential to be an endearing moment, I think it fell flat.

The impact of Tigress's hug was brought on by her character's hardcore nature and reputation of being heartless, further strengthened with the knowledge that she was hugging Po (which was obviously way outside her comfort zone) as a show of companionship and fundamental understanding. Tigress hugged Po because he needed someone to recognize his strive for closure.

Zhen's hug had little to no impact because she had no reason to do it and it didn't indicate growth. She hugs Po because she's sorry for betraying him and doesn't want him to be killed by the Chameleon, but neither of these things are newly-established via this hug; we have already gathered by now that Zhen regrets betraying Po and doesn't want him to get hurt.

The hug is far from the movie's weakest point, but I think it's unnecessary given the context. I'm big on hugs in movies (an underutilized form of platonic affection, in my opinion), but it didn't fit here. I don't hate it, and I see it as an honest effort to bring emotionality to Po and Zhen's relationship, but it seems arbitrary.

Zhen and Po's relationship has a lot of potential and I'd be open to seeing more of them in the future, but I think some more thoughtful development needs to occur before I can humor it further. Even so, I can see myself featuring Zhen in some future post-KFP4 one-shots—sparingly, of course, because we have a lot of Furious Five content to compensate for.

Overall, they had a cute dynamic and some sweet moments but I'm not attached. I'm on board with Po having a student but I think their relationship needs a lot more development, something that this film unfortunately didn't give them time to either accomplish or earn.

Now, onto the Chameleon!

The concept of the Chameleon's character is admittedly super interesting. She's the deuteragonist's fastidious mother figure who feels that Zhen owes her a debt and as a result holds her to an impossible standard. That dynamic had the potential to be so interesting but I didn't think it was explored at all. There is no indication of Zhen having any internal conflict about fighting the Chameleon, no emotional complexity between them at all; it's disappointing because I think it would've added a bit of earnestness to the film.

Additionally, the idea of a shape-shifting villain is versatile. A shape-shifting villain gives those telling the story a lot of room to experiment with the protagonist and different ways in which the main character can be challenged and tested. It's yet another good idea utilized poorly. Just one idea: the Chameleon could have disguised herself as one (or several) of Po's family, friends, etc. and brought to fruition a new arc with his character (seeing as he arguably doesn't have one in this film), but she only disguises herself as Zhen very briefly in the movie.

Furthermore, the Chameleon completely relies on the powers of previous villains to pose any sort of threat to the main characters. She summons Po's former nemeses from the Spirit Realm (despite there being little logic in doing so considering Kai's literal evisceration) and takes their kung fu abilities for herself.

An excerpt from my first KFP4 discussion post that I think is relevant to the point I'm trying to make:

I don’t think it would be in the best interest of anyone if the past villains were to come back in any way that’s not a flashback (even then, I’m not sure I’d see the point). In all honesty, I thought that the whole point of the villains was that they died and stayed dead. They were defeated by Po once and for all as a testament to the idea of establishing Po's character growth and journey as a person through the bad things he’s able to overcome. It’d be highly contradictory to the messages of the other films if these villains were to suddenly come back.

While there was an honest effort made to portray the Chameleon as intimidating, I never felt as though any of the characters were endangered by either her or her army of lizard henchman. She's a visually appealing character (aside from her eyes, which I thought more resembled those of a gecko than a chameleon) and I greatly enjoyed Davis's performance, but overall I don't see the Chameleon as a notable villain.

The return of Tai Lung (had he been on his own) had the makings to be an excellent story, especially considering the importance of teacher-student dynamics in KFP4. To see him interacting with Shifu would have been incredible and could have led to further closure on Tai Lung's end (because I think that's kind of what the team was going for anyway), but it didn't happen.

It was nice to see Ian McShane reprise his role, but I wish Tai Lung's characterization had been more reminiscent of the way he was in the first film and more complimentary of his overall character arc. Tai Lung isn't a one-dimensional villain with a singular goal and motivation, and I couldn't help but feel as though the complexity of his character was simplified for the sake of KFP4's narrative.

Tai Lung's presence in KFP4 may be odd, but Shen and Kai's appearances are even more so. Kai, if I remember correctly, was fully obliterated by Po, reduced to literal particles on screen (which is kind of wild now that I think about it). Shen being in the Spirit Realm makes sense all things considered; however, Po and Li had no visible reaction to his presence, which seemed a bit unlikely considering Shen's deeds. This plot hole can likely be attributed to the fact that Shen and Kai's cameos (to my knowledge) were last-minute additions to the movie.

I have to talk about the pacing. I have to. I'm sorry, bear with me.

To me, the film's pacing is erratic and disconcerting. While I can appreciate a quick-moving narrative that doesn't dawdle on storylines that aren't interesting/important, KFP4 kind of flings itself too far in the opposite direction and ends up being frighteningly fast-paced. Once the credits began, I felt like I had been holding my breath for the entire movie.

KFP4 is confusing because while the runtime is standard for a KFP movie, it feels incredibly short. At the same time, the film's story moves at a breakneck speed and leaves little time for heart and development. These things culminate into a barreling boulder of a movie that simply doesn't have time to let its characters, story, or audience take a breath.

A fast pace is not inherently negative, but I don't think it worked in the favor of KFP4. The KFP franchise has always been very emotionally grounded (and just very grounded in general), so to see a film in which emotion/heart takes an aggressive backseat in comparison to action and comedy is jarring. While I think it's unreasonable for fans to expect the same emotional integrity as the original films to be present in the current and upcoming ones, I still think there's room for Po to grow and I felt as though the notion of him developing further was brushed aside in this film.

As for Po's growth, I felt it was nearly nonexistent. The previous trilogy wrapped up his character's journey beautifully and I know that KFP4 was bound to struggle with this particular aspect of making another KFP film; however, just because the strongest pillars of Po's character are established doesn't serve as a valid excuse to reverse his development and repeat what he learned in KFP3.

In KFP3, Po learned firsthand that he is capable of spreading wisdom and teaching kung fu. He also learns that he is constantly growing and that change is inevitable; there is always something more to learn.

"If you only do what you can do, you will never be more than you are now."

"I don't want to be anything more, I like who I am!"

In KFP4, Po pushes against this narrative despite fully accepting it in KFP3, actively reversing crucial parts of his character development achieved in the latter. KFP3 was non-ambiguously about learning to cope with change and responsibility, and I can't help but feel like KFP4 is simply copying this message while not adding anything to it.

Additionally, I felt that KFP4's Po generally felt less personal than he has in the past. In every KFP movie up to the franchise's most recent addition, I felt very connected to Po as an audience member. I felt like I was truly seeing the world of KFP through his eyes. I consider this to be one of the franchise's most impressive feats; it's incredibly difficult to build a universe around a character without making the audience feel limited to one perspective and one part of the world.

With KFP4, I felt both limited and disconnected. The world didn't feel as vast and all-encompassing as it has in the past and Po didn't seem fully like himself. This could be me nitpicking (as I'm prone to do), but I can't recall a single moment in the movie in which Po was alone on screen. Scenes like these are crucial for me because I see them as a meet-cute between the character and the audience, a moment for us to cross the bridge into their world in a way that's silent and intuitive. These little bonding moments are absolutely integral to feeling connected to a character.

Po's dream sequence in the first KFP movie is one of the best examples of this. It presents his aspirations, alludes to his way of life up to the point of the movie, and showcases his personality. During Po's dream sequence, the audience is quite literally inside Po's mind; we're there with him, seeing what he sees, subsequently feeling what he feels. Po is a dreamer at heart and makes the audience feel like dreamers, too.

In KFP4, I felt like I little to no point of reference when it comes to how Po was feeling. I didn't feel immersed in him and his world.

I know I've been very "doom and gloom" throughout this post, which is an exhausting mindset for everyone involved. I want to end my critique with something positive because I think some praise is deserved. Let's just say the movie could have been a lot worse, the details of which I'm sure you're all well aware.

Congratulations, you've reached the end! Thank you so much to all of you who took the time to read this unnecessarily long and detailed review. As long as I help someone translate their conflicted feelings into coherent thoughts, I'll call it a win.

KFP4 has its flaws and there are a lot of aspects that I dislike, but the I greatly admire and respect the hard work put into the film by those of the crew who put their efforts forward and tried their best to make it work. This does not at all excuse my issues with the movie, but it's worth saying.

As for the future of the series, I only hope that the next installment is more considerate of the franchise's origins and why Po's story is being told in the first place. I fully believe that another sequel could be good (even great!), but only given a strong, passionate crew with a great understanding of the characters and world (and I wouldn't be averse to some previous directors returning, just to put it out there).

Thanks again to those who took the time to read this crazy excuse for a movie review. Feel free to either disagree with me or add things in the replies/reblogs, I'm always looking for more thoughts to think.

Until next time!

#kung fu panda 4 #kung fu panda #dreamworks animation #kfp #kfp 4 #movie review #i'll add the actual picture of the furious five's cameo when i can get ahold of one of decent quality #my time has come #so i didn't love it #but it is what it is #free the five #perhaps i treated kfp3 too harshly #don't get me wrong the movie had good qualities and i can tell a lot of work went into it #a lot of missed potential imo #a lot of characters done dirty #i didn't even mention the score but i thought it was just okay #i wasn't wowed #i know close to nothing about composing though so i should probably just not even go there #credits were the best part both cinematically and musically #i feel mean but i'm not going to be dishonest #bc obviously you all simply must know how i feel about the silly panda movie #a more detailed version of the grievances i have w the dragon warrior plot can be found in my og discussion post if anyone's interested #as well as my thoughts on bringing back old villains #might make some edits to this in the future but this is all i have to say for now #doesn't hurt my love for the og trilogy but i'm still upset #alas we move on #kfp4 is not canon idc fight me

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pretensesoup · 6 months ago

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Queer Books 2024

I've been meaning to write more book reviews this Pride, because they were pretty popular last year, and I like writing them. But I've been tired. Busy with the new novel (last year, I'd just released one, so I had more time; this year I am trying to get one out the door to my editor). Busy sleeping and having feelings about stuff. Anyway, let's correct that.

Space Opera is a book that a friend of mine saw someone reading in a doctor's waiting room and mentioned on our group chat. I then requested the audiobook based on the title and tagline alone (the tagline is, "In space everyone can hear you sing"). Aaaaaand I was not disappointed. The lovechild of David Bowie and Douglas Adams, it was incredibly amusing and glittery, and at times kind of poignant as well. The variety of aliens was amazing. And it turned out to be really queer, too.

Like...what do you do when the main character defines himself as "gender splat"? Or one of the characters is a kind of hollow blue space flamingo that happens to be one of three genders of her species, and another character is a time-traveling red panda? At one point, someone has sex with a sentient beam of hypermasculine moonlight. If you always wished for a universe that feels huge, beautiful, and totally ungovernable, this is it.

After I finished the audiobook, I checked out the hard copy for my husband, who loved it so much he would read passages aloud to me. Then he ordered a copy for our household. I feel like that is the most ringing endorsement I can muster.

Key quote:

“The only wall we could ever build against What’s Going On was the glitter and the shine and the synth and the knowing grin that never stops knowing. The show. Because the opposite of fascism isn’t anarchy, it’s theater. When the world is fucked, you go to the theater, you go to the shine, and when the bad men come, all there is left to do is sing them down.”

Anyway, 10/10 for style. I do heartily recommend the audiobook, just because the narrator does so many different voices, and it's very fun.

#queer books #lgbtq books #queer fiction #lgbtq fiction #books #space opera #catherynne m. valente #science fiction #glam

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miloscat · 7 months ago

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[Review] Legend of Kay Anniversary (Wii U)

An unremarkable PS2 action-adventure.

After immersing myself in Avatar media for so long I looked around for any other games set in Asia-inspired fantasy worlds but made by Westerners. This let me knock one off my Wii U backlog, the 2015 remaster of the 2005 PS2 game Legend of Kay. Neon Software, the German studio behind the original game, are known to me for their Amiga Sonic clone Mr. Nutz: Hoppin' Mad, and it's somewhat fitting that their final game before closure was this other furry platformer. Some of the Neon cofounders went on to form Keen Games, which seems to have morphed into a new Kaiko... the original Kaiko being the company that the Mr. Nutz Hoppin' Mad team left to form Neon in the first place! Who knows how long they'll survive now under the aegis of the troubled and layoff-happy Embracer, but it's been four years since their last remaster...

Anyway, this game is a sort of 3D Zelda-like-slash-3D platformer filled with anthropomorphic animal characters, which as a Rare fan sounds up my alley. Comparing it to Starfox Adventures may be a little generous though: this is very much a B-tier PS2 action game, and a graphical revamp for new generation consoles can't magically fix the mediocrity.

To get the plot out of the way: it's extremely Normal. Kay is a "plucky" (read: obnoxious) protagonist, using his martial arts training to fight back against the occupation of his cat village by evil gorillas and rats. He travels his island to settlements of rabbits, frogs, and pandas to free them from oppression. I think it's telling that there are no credits given for story or writing; anything story-related is constantly undermined by overly shallow characterisations, completely functional video game progression (go here to get key to open door to go there etc.), and the most brain-dead "banter". For example, Kay thinks the height of action hero quips is to call a rat "cheese-breath" about a hundred times.

The latter issue is not helped by some misguided voice acting choices. It's a fully voiced game but you'll wish it wasn't with Kay's bland sarcastic schtick and almost every other character uncomfortably presenting as a borderline racist caricature. Mostly it's white people doing faux-"Asian" accents, although apparently crocodiles are Eastern European and frogs are... Jamaican, for some reason? I was glad to find a setting that let me skip any dialogue scene with a quick tap of X, because there's no other way to speed up the tedious exposition and pointless back-and-forth when you meet enemy groups.

There's only a handful of what you might call "puzzles", and the platforming ranges from "not bad" to "OK", serviceable but doesn't excel. The biggest strength and biggest weakness of the game is its combat, which is pretty involved. You can swap between three weapons which have different attributes, you often have to get around enemy blocks so there's a Wind Waker-style roll around move to hit their back, but you can also zip between targets during a combo, or use rolling, crouching, or jump attacks. You can carry up to 5 usable items which sometimes are used to explore but you have to rely on them for combat encounters late in the game when they start throwing waves at you with hordes of armoured enemies. When the difficulty spikes like this, it all just becomes too much and goes from an exercise in creatively using moves to keep your combo up to a struggle to survive (and if you die, you lose any consumables you used in your last attempt, also there's a lives system for some reason??).

I said combat might be the game's strength and it was clearly a focus of the project, but I had the most fun exploring the little worlds. There's lots of goodies to collect, mostly in the form of chests and pots containing money. You quickly end up with more than you'll ever spend but I still liked finding it. The point multiplier mechanic may seem superfluous but when you get accustomed to the flow of the platforming sections, grabbing coloured crystals to keep this combo going to make your fights and coins worth more points becomes addictive. The level design may be nothing special but the zones you traverse have some character to them.

It should be noted that this is a semi-linear game, in that the levels are mostly open to explore with events and sub-dungeons within them, but you progress from one field to the next with no way to go back. This bit me on more than one occasion when I blundered into the story trigger to move on before turning in one of the rare sidequests or going down a side path to find a health extension, making it permanently missable. This frustration prompted me to occasionally consult a Gamefaqs guide with maps during each subsequent chapter. The game does give you a minimap in the corner of the screen but it can't be expanded to a full map so it's less useful than it could be.

Legend of Kay would have felt middling even at release but rereleasing it just makes its deficiencies even more obvious. It's still got some charm for being "of that era" (I was often reminded of The Hobbit's action-adventure game from the same generation, but with fewer instant death pits), so I got some enjoyment from it. And it has some ideas that work, like the acrobatic combat and combo system. While some of the environments look nice there were just as many drab areas, and the repeated character model reuse got old. Oh, and sometimes you ride an animal and it's not fun. On the whole, I can't recommend this one... even if you ignore the cringey cultural stereotypes!!

#legend of kay #legend of kay anniversary #neon software #kaiko #wii u #review

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