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#p.s. the platonics are sarcasm
antisocialpyromaniac · 2 months
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Reasons I love Deadpool and Wolverine:
The totally platonic hand holding
The platonic homoerotic tension
The twelve hours of platonic sex in the Honda Odyssey
Comic accurate Wolverine suit
The platonic pet names
The platonic penetration 
It sets Deadpool up to be a bigger part of the MCU
Logan was allowed to have feelings and stay with Wade. 
The platonic meet the parents scene.
Them platonically moving in together
The two of them platonically trying to sacrifice their lives for each other
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lunaralight09 · 3 years
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hear me out;; SCPs with a half-cannibal!S/O (gender neutral or male) that can eat both normal food and y'know, organs,,
(P.s. I'll add picture/images that I add in Tumblr later . And sorry if there is a mistakes in this . I'm not English )
SCP 035
That's ... Unusual . Lucky me . I'm porcelain mask .
It a little shocking when you first thought about maybe eating your enemy ... I don't know what he thought about it . But I can assure that she was really shocked . He didn't expect to see a cannibal in here . Do 05 know about it ?
They are concerned that you aren't fully a cannibal . but it's pretty cool too ! 50/50 should I say ? (You can imagine how you met together . So ... yeah . AND MY INSIDE DEMON NAMED "WRITTER" IS STILL SLEEPING AND DOES NOT KNOW WHAT I NEED OF THEM .)
She's really neutral about it . And I don't think that something will change in your relationships with him (You choose whatever it's platonic/romantic one). They'll be very curious . And if you 2 got out of Foundation and blew the facility and all SCPs got out . He'll be living with you ! And ask you what would you like to eat . Human or normal food . You choose . It will be pretty easy you know 'cause 035 have charism- control of people mind . No problem bestie/lover !
Like I said they're 50/50 and don't worry once you'll know each other better she won't tell anybody about your secret . I'd say 9/10 .
SCP 049
Ahem . Again you choose how you met .
He's intrigued by your diet of eating humans and food that you usually eat which is not again humans ... And the truth is that his patients/zombies eat humans too . Who would've known that ? Almost everybody . So he thinks that it like normal ... don't ask how . He's pretty strange . He's okay with it . And never would tell anybody cause you'll be in big trouble for that . And he doesn't want that to happen to his significant other/friend .
Oh and ... if you get hungry at containment breach ... Well ... he can kill for you . Yeah ... He's loyal to him friends . And he don't have many . It's sad(
Welp I think he'll be 9.5/10 .
SCP 073
Oh ... um . You're special ! Yeah ... Don't worry I won't tell anybody about it . I'm just surprised . When he learned that you are half cannibal ... that's really shocked . Like ... when people eat other humans they get sick/become cannibal . But you're very ... lucky that you didn't become fully a cannibal . So yeah .
Oh and Cain is okay with that . Don't worry . And like with 035 it won't change the relationship with you . And if you 2 live together he would cook human food . He just don't know how to cook human meat or organs . But you can teach him . He'll really try to make a good food .(Welp idk what to write next .)
Probably 8/10
SCP 076
... Okay
He's just neutral about you being a half cannibal . He don't really care . He think that you're a regular human just have a special diet . Or something like that . Like I said neutral . Oh and he'll help you when you want to eat ... human organs.(It sounds weird , but I'm okay with that . I like it- ) He likes to kill people and you can eat the bodies of dead people . That's the plus for 2 of you .
Oh nobody won't ask him about you or something about the cannibals . They don't think that he will talk or be interested in it .
7/10 .
SCP 323
...Do my mate want a heart ?
Yeah , you know a wendigo and a half cannibal . What could go wrong ? Well they would offer you human organs recently , even if you tell them that you're not fully a cannibal . They just like that someone share the same diet as them . Well overexcited . Oh and they will bring you dead people , so you can eat .
... Who wants to ask question to wendigo ? Huh ? No one ... Okay .
10/10
SCP 682
... So what ?
Like 076 he don't care about a fact that you're a half cannibal . He literally like : 'Me too . I eat people too .' . He's a good pal/partner . Well not really , but he's very sarcastic . The sarcasm . SARCASM ... That's not the point of this headcannons ... Let's return to half cannibal y/n . Like I said he don't give a f- about your diet .
Eh if people died and was half eaten . They'll think that it's 682 , 953 or 096. You know why . Not really many people wouldn't suspect you . It really depend on your behavior .
7/10 .
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little-kat07 · 3 years
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HI HI SORRY I'VE BEEN GONE BUT GUESS WHAT I'M HERE NOW (Lumi)
sO how about moxiety?? oh my gawd its so cute. theyre adorable. so this can be seen as platonic or romantic?? idk it could word for fanon remus too but like. i think it works with moxiety better. (patton's canonical depression + virgil's sarcasm and caring for the others despite what he says (dw i promise this is a nice one))
cavetown has a new song out that i just HAD to do! Struck By Lightning (feat. Cavetown) by "Sara Kays"!! i think it would totally work for like, Patton having a depressive episode and just not wanting to be there anymore. so Virgil comes along like "oh ho ho ur sad well i cant promise to fix it (im not magic) but i can be here for you and be silly and sarcastic." i just really think it would work well and would be super duper cute
~Lumi p.s. im sorry i havent been sending you as many. im really not feeling up to anything lately and really lack motivation. its not apathy, i promise- i still really care about you!! im just sad and kinda empty lately, and feeing guilty, which makes it hard to do things even i need to do. either way ily/p
AAA! Lumi it's FINE you are AMAZING and you never need to do ANYTHING if you aren't feeling up to it, I LOVE YOUUU
A while ago i saw this really cool idea that Patton physically bottles up his emotions. Like, literally. That he has a closet full of jars of little clouds and liquids and stuff- I can specify what kind of stuff later, but this song repeatedly talks about a thunderstorm and rain and laying down in the grass and getting struck by lightning, so It makes me think...
Maybe Patton, in a fit of anger or dissociation, smashed some of the bottles? And the clouds drifted up and created like. This mini thunderstorm on the ceiling of Patton's room. And it's raining and thundering and Virgil comes hangs out with patton and tries to make him feel just a bit better, and when patton does, the storm dies down? And then maybe he has a little sun in his room instead-
I'm thinking of the song very literally but what do you think?
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Hello luv, if you are still doing bob ships and feel like it, could I get one? I never do asks, but these are so cute...
So, uhm. I am 5'2, blonde hair (which I love to occasionally dye varying shades including reds, pinks and purple...just bc, FUN). I am a bit curvy with hourglass figure. Blue-green eyes. I love wearing dresses, but also I'm a jeans t-shirt and hoodie kinda girl.
Sarcasm is my primary language. I love to laugh and make jokes. My sense of humor runs the gamut from awful puns, to wildly inappropriate innuendo to poop jokes to dark gallows humor. I find a lot of things humorous as long as it's not mean spirited. Making people laugh is one of the greatest feelings in the world to me.
I curse like a goddamn sailor. Haha.
I'm an INFP and I'm not very chatty with strangers/new people unless I find we have a common interest. I have pretty severe anxiety and some less severe depression which I've learned to mask in public and around strangers extremely well for the most part. But it succkkss.
My circle of friends is small, and I like it that way. I am firecly loyal and protective of my few close friends though. My love language is 'I randomly saw this thing while I was out and it made me think of you so I bought it for you.' Lol
I do not like or ever want kids, but I adore animals. I have 2 dogs, 2 cats and a house rabbit currently.
I love Halloween and Christmas equally, which my friends give me shit for. But they can fight me, I can't choose one fave. 🎃🎄
I love music and miss going to shows. I used to go tons of shows. I've been to 100s over the last 10-12 years and have seen SO MANY bands. I used to wait all day in line for my favorites and have been on barricades more times than I can count. One of my favorite things is singing, but not really in front of people. My voice is decent and I'm not tone deaf, but I don't like any attention on me for any reason really. Unless it's someone laughing at something funny I've said. Lol
Also love traveling, museums (I minored in art history) and going to the beach (I live in Florida). And finally I love Marvel. The movies and a lot of Marvel comics. I have a subscription at my local comic shop and they know me, and my 2 dogs, by name.
You are lovely for doing these for people. ❤❤And thank you so much if you do one for me. I hope life is treating you well.
Hi doll! 🤗 Absolutely, I would love to ship you!! I hope life is treating you well too ❤️ I ship you with… Shifty Powers!
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- Even though it was attraction at first sight, it took a minute for you two to meet each other. Neither one of you were prepared to approach the other.
- Luckily, Liebgott played matchmaker and got you two talking.
- Shifty LOVES how you dye your hair all sorts of colours. The colours make him feel happy every time he sees them. He loves how creative yet low key your style is.
- Halloween is “your” holiday and Christmas is “his” holiday. Even though you both LOVE both!
- Every year you alternate who’s in charge of the couples costume and who’s in charge of the ugly Christmas sweaters.
- Shifty softens some of your edges and you bring out the mischievous side in him.
- But at your core, you two are very loving and loyal people which is the foundation of what you have in common.
- You don’t have a ton of shared “interests” or “hobbies” but you two are very supportive of each other’s passions.
- Shifty is always enthusiastic about going to shows with you even though the music’s volume sometimes bothers him.
- So you bought him some earplugs.
- I can see you running an unofficial animal sanctuary together. Your life together would be filled with lots of deep rooted love and dedication.
P.S. I feel like you’d also be platonic besties with Donald Malarkey
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br4inr0tx · 3 years
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Heyyyy can I please have a slasher match-up? Tysm in advance!
So I'm straight (might be bi) but for now I'm gonna go with straight. I use she/her pronouns, my top 3 zodiacs are Leo sun, Aries moon, and Leo rising. And I'm a ENTP.
So I'm kinda short I'm 5'4, super skinny and petite, I don't weigh a lot and I get made fun of a lot for it, and I have pale skin and freckles all over my face and body. I have brown thick hair that goes down to my mid back and brown eyes! I'm not very curvy I have the body of a cereal box but hey I have some nice hips and thighs I guess?
When people first see me I look intimidating due to my resting bitch face but if you talk to me I'm pretty nice and warm! Once you get to know me better I can be very sarcastic well no actaully about 99% of everything that comes out of my mouth is sarcastic but hey I just love some good sarcasm! And I can be very reckless and goofy!
I'm also very feisty and if someone even looks at me wrong then it's on....like I will not hesitate to put you in your place. I can be very stubborn and competitive as well. I also live by the saying "Fake it till you make it". Because thats literally what I do lol.
The other side of me is basically really bitchy and cold I kinda have trouble with feeling empathy torwards people sometimes and I tend to shut people out and isolate myself. I hate talking about my feelings and I cover those up too and I act fine but usually I'm not. Also anxiety sucks......and I have that really bad. I also push myself really hard with certain things to the point where it's just unhealthy and I can't stop myself usually other people have to step in and make me take a break for a while when that happens.
I love dry and dark humor that cracks me up a lot. And dad jokes too....I make a lot of those!
I loves 90's and 80's rock but 90' is the best and grunge music is just immaculate ✋😩. But I love anything under the rock genre basically.
I also have a grunge style like I love flannels, band t-shirts, combat boots etc.
I hate spiders I have a phobia of them and will literally die if I see one. And I love horror movies!
It was such a close call with a certain two characters, but I’ve made my decision!
P.S. : I’ve met Robert England- and Freddy is one of my favorites! This was definitely fun to type!
Your Slasher matchup is.. Freddy Krueger !!
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Someone generally extroverted and loves horror is perfect for Freddy wether it’s platonic or romantic.
Freddy is a huge ladies man if it wasn’t obvious enough. I feel like he would care to much on body type. As long as they have a pretty face and hot personality. Which in this case, you fit the package. You look so cute being so small.. you almost remind him of those old porcelain dolls with cute bonnets and dresses.
Freddy doesn’t get scared easily. You’re not intimidating to him at all. He’s the bigger monster, and he’s more dangerous then you, right? Why should he be scared?
This man jokes quite a tone, so you can see him catching up with your jokes and sarcasm quickly. I feel his humor is lots of dry sarcasm and dad jokes when he get comfy with someone. He’ll be over the moon for some banter of the both of you going roasting each other.
Like most of the slashers, they kind of feed off anxiety and fears so- Freddy doesn’t know how to deal with it that-that well. He tries cheering you up with funny stand-up comedy like stories or jokes, sense it’s probably his favorite memory from you two dating.
He can’t help but indulge your fear in spiders though. You like all this scary shit and a little spider gets you to scream like a six-year-old girl? Hilarious!
He likes your style a lot! He likes sweaters personally, but he’s rocked a few flannels in his days. He always complements you about..especially if you’re wearing something a bit showy if you catch my drift.. ;).
This man would definitely rock out with you! 80s is his fucking jam obviously, and I’m sure he’d like 90s sense it’s not to different.
Runners up: Michael Myers.
— coii
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artificialqueens · 4 years
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Different People (Different Arguments), 3/14 (Branjie/Jankie) - Ortega
a/n: ayo!! so sorry for the update gap fam, but chapter 3 is here! soooo hope u all enjoy. p.s. i promise I love Nicky, Gigi and Crystal…but every good story has a bad guy right???
fic summary: Brooke Lynn is a political advisor for a government department where she has to contend with an incompetent Minister, maintaining her stone-cold bitch image, working alongside a press team of slackers, and the Prime Minister’s ever-so-slightly terrifying enforcer breathing down her neck 24/7. So when a familiar face from her past arrives as her new boss, she’s not exactly thrilled to add another problem to her ever-growing pile.
And then she admits she’s got a crush on her coworker.
Last chapter: Jackie became a breakout political star after she spoke out against the homophobia and misogyny in the media, and Brooke finally acknowledged that her feelings for Vanessa maybe weren’t as platonic as she’d thought.
In this chapter: When Shadow Minister Nicky Doll and her advisors arrive at DoSac for an informal, pre-election briefing, Jan tries to cope with the stress of seeing her old colleagues again. There’s more at stake, though, when Jackie reveals a secret that cannot get out.
***
Casting her eyes over the meeting room, Brooke attempted to focus on what Jackie was actually saying. She was trying her hardest, she really was, but it was just that Vanessa was wearing the red jumper today, the really soft one that made her look more cuddly and adorable than normal.  
Brooke had a crush on Vanessa. She’d accepted that now. The way to deal with it was just to never act upon it, talk about it, or to admit it to anyone outside of her own head. She’d spent so long cultivating the perfect stone-cold, heartless bitch image and she wasn’t exactly going to do anything to taint that now. The most important thing she had to remember was that she didn’t need anyone- she had no desire to be in a relationship, to be tied down and have to answer to someone else all the time. She had a perfectly good bullet to get her off and if she felt like it she could always go and pick up someone random from a bar. There was always that irritating aspect when the afterglow had faded, though, if whoever she’d used for the night wanted to stay over, or heaven forbid see her again. Things were just better as they were, Brooke concluded. She couldn’t get attached, or hurt, or fall in love this way. If there was one thing she wasn’t, it was vulnerable. Getting into a relationship with someone put you in the weakest position you could possibly get.
She would know, after all.
Still, she was allowed to dream about it; an ideal world in which love worked out the way it did in books and movies, one huge cliché where Brooke and Vanessa were happy together and lived in perfect domesticity, had the best sex of their lives and went on adorable dates. It was simplistic and shallow and completely unrealistic, but perhaps that was all it was meant to be.  
Gazing at Vanessa again, she was surprised to see her eyes already on her. She was even more surprised when she looked around the room and saw that everyone else was staring at her as well.
“Brooke Lynn?” Jackie asked, staring at her expectantly. She stood in front of a huge whiteboard with marker pen scribbled all over it- generic buzzwords such as “connectivity”, “inclusivity” and “diversity” sprang out to her, but nothing really indicated what Jackie could have previously been talking about.
“Um. The fiscal year?” Brooke guessed blankly. Jan laughed from across the table, throwing her head back and letting her blonde hair cascade down the back of the chair. Jackie didn’t find it as funny.
“For God’s sake, Brooke, this policy is only going to work if everyone pays attention and has some form of input other than just staring at me with glassy eyes like they’ve been goddamn taxidermied!” she sighed, sitting her pen down on the table and sliding into an empty chair. Brooke felt a pang of guilt- Jackie had been doing well in the two weeks that had followed her Von’Du interview and had received heaps of public support and attention. The perfect time, Bianca had insisted, to get some new ideas out there and into parliament.
“Sorry. Remind me of the premise?”
Irritated, Jackie rolled her eyes before Vanessa cut in with a sweet smile. “Issa scheme to get the UK to house more refugees and get ‘em into work therefore boosting the economy, diversifyin’ the nation and basically makin’ us look like good guys to the rest of Europe.”
Brooke shot her a grateful smile across the table, trying her best not to blush.
“Thank God someone’s been listening,” Jackie smirked. “We’re basically just trying to come up with a name for it. Or a tagline or something.”
Brooke pressed her pen to her lips, thinking for a second. Nina suddenly piped up from beside her.
“What about…Don’t be bigoted. Be uninhibited,” she said, her suggestion met with utter silence from the rest of the group.
“Well that was nice, Nina, but how about something a bit less…” Jackie thought for a second, trying to find the correct word.
“Shit?” Brooke shrugged, Jan once again letting out a peal of laughter. Vanessa was clearly trying to conceal her giggles from the other side of the huge table, while both Nina and Jackie looked unimpressed.
“Do you have any better suggestions?”
“No, and I’m not going to pretend like I do! I’m not going to just yell out any old crap like I’ve got shit idea Tourette’s,” Brooke shrugged, Jan now bent over in her chair from laughter and Vanessa now audibly giggling. Brooke couldn’t tell, but she could have sworn Jackie let out the tiniest snort of a laugh before regaining composure.
“Ladies, please, this is important! This is a good damn idea, if I’m allowed to blow my own trumpet, and we’ve got to get it out there sooner rather than later,” she insisted. A loud, harsh vibration from Nina’s phone startled them all.
“Bianca’s here,” she announced, trying to keep her tone bright. Before the girls even had time to react to the news, Bianca had appeared in the room in a smart, tailored black and white suit.
“Good morning to you all, shit Spice Girls impersonation act,” she smiled cheerfully.
“Mornin’, Bianca,” Vanessa greeted her.
“To what do I owe the pleasure?” Jackie quipped dryly, lounging back in her seat.
“Two things from me,” Bianca began, ignoring the Minister’s sarcasm. “The shadow minister’s visit, today at 11. They’re going to be talking to Nina and the rest of those brain-dead, civil-service puppets out there about what’s going to happen if they take office. Nina, your job is to basically communicate to them that they’ll be taking it out of my cold, dead hands.”
“Fuck, that’s today?!” Vanessa exclaimed somewhat involuntarily, earning her a steely glare from Bianca which in turn made Vanessa look as if she was seconds away from death. Reaching into her pocket and retrieving her phone, Brooke fired off a quick text to Vanessa under the table.
B: It’s okay. Snakes only eat once every few weeks x
As Bianca briefed Nina, Brooke watched as Vanessa looked down into her lap and smiled, a light blush colouring her cheeks very slightly, although that could have just been the light of the room. Satisfied that she’d made Vanessa feel better, she tuned back in to what Bianca was saying.
“…you tell them nothing. Except where the toilets are, but you lie about that.”
“So who’s actually accompanying Nicky today? I’ve heard nothing and I want to make sure I’m relatively prepared for whoever enters my department,” Jackie folded her arms across her chest, already defensive.
“You already know about Nicky. Privately educated daddy’s girl and massively out of touch with the electorate. Probably a lizard wearing a human skin suit, I’ve never particularly wanted to get close enough to her to check if that theory’s true,” Bianca shrugged. “The other two coming with her are going to be her advisors, Gigi and Crystal.”
“Oh no,” Jan suddenly exclaimed from her chair. Her face had gone incredibly ashen, her eyes wide and fearful. Suddenly Brooke was acutely aware that she no longer had only Vanessa to worry about. If Jan’s old colleagues and ex-friends bumped into her it wouldn’t be particularly pleasant, and Jan would no doubt be incredibly shaken. Crossing the floor was like a betrayal, pledging loyalty to one party after being aligned with another was treacherous, and so it was likely that Gigi, Crystal and Nicky still wanted Jan’s head on a stick.
“Oh yes. Gigi Goode, bit of a newborn as far as politics is concerned but she’s got impressive credentials. Graduated from Oxford University with a first class degree and a PhD in Politics and Business. Won the World Universities Debating Championships five consecutive times. She’s confident, clever, and has zero scruples. Knows every loophole in the world of politics,” Bianca reeled off. Jackie raised her eyebrows, clearly impressed.
“She sounds interesting.”
“Don’t even make contact with her, she’ll probably have you telling her the fucking nuke codes and all the department’s discrepancies within the first 30 seconds of meeting her.  Crystal Harness is a different story,” Bianca frowned. “Not too good when it comes to actual political knowledge. Nina, you and her would get along. She’s a baby too, really, not been in the game long. Graduated from Oxford Brookes. Second class degree in Psychology and Sociology. Don’t think for a second that this is a reason to underestimate her. She is cunning and has intellect and knows everything about everyone, don’t let her see you break a sweat.”
Jackie looked momentarily terrified. “I didn’t realise Nicky had some kind of metahuman task force working for her.”
“They’re not that bad,” Brooke sighed, tipping her head back in her chair. “If you talk to Nicky entirely in cockney rhyming slang, she’ll just combust. Gigi is fine if you give her a fake smile or two. Crystal is basically simple. You’ve got nothing to worry about, Jackie.”
Feeling the mood in the room change, Brooke turned around in her wheely chair and was met with Bianca’s icy stare.
“What part of ‘don’t underestimate these people’ do you not understand? What, you think they’re here for a jolly little chat with Nina about worker’s rights and office hours? They’re here to get intel, and I want you all to be more airtight than some middle-aged white woman’s Tupperware. And no, that’s not a euphemism.”
Brooke watched as Vanessa wrinkled up her nose in distaste. She had such a cute little nose, and Brooke found herself imagining how perfect it would be to just kiss it gently before they both drifted off to sleep together in a little house that they shared. Frowning involuntarily, Brooke chased those particular thoughts out of her head. They were way too intense, too weird and commitment-y for her friend she had a stupid crush on. Remembering what Bianca had said earlier, she turned and faced her.
“What was the other thing? You said you had two things to tell us.”
“I’m getting there! Right, Jackie, I’ve got you a good photo op this evening. Some new charging points for electric car owners, it’s going to be the biggest one in the UK and a big step for climate change, yadda yadda yadda. We’re going to get you driving in a fucking Prius or something, charging it up and then driving out again. Pretty simple, but effective- what? What is it?”
Every head in the room turned to face Jackie, who looked as if she’d seen a ghost. Her hands were gripping the edge of the table, her knuckles white. She’d turned pale, her face ashen, and she seemed worried.
“Driving? No, I can’t drive, there’s no way,” she babbled, her usually calm and composed exterior completely destroyed.
“Jackie?” Jan prompted quietly, clearly concerned. Brooke shared a brief look of confusion with Vanessa. It was clear nobody had the faintest idea what was going on.
“I mean, you can drive. We have your drivers’ license, you sent in a photocopy as proof of identification when you received Darienne’s job. I don’t really see the issue here?” Bianca curled her top lip, completely unfazed by Jackie’s behaviour.
“Bianca, you don’t understand…I’ve not driven in ages, I…do you not-”
“Do I not what?” Bianca cut in, her irritation mounting by the second. “Look, I don’t really have time to stand here and argue the toss. This is part of your job. You’re doing the goddamn photo op. Christ, this was the girl who two weeks ago was desperate to get on prime time television. Now you’re shitting yourself at the thought of driving a bloody battery operated car. Get it done. 6 o’clock tonight. See you all later.”
As Bianca click-clacked out of the department, the mood in the room was still very tense. Almost frozen, Brooke thought, the tiny hairs on her arms standing up from goosebumps. Jan was the first to speak.
“Jackie, are you okay?” she almost whispered, her voice both deafening and quiet in the silent room. There were a few seconds (minutes?) where there was no response at all, in fact Brooke was almost convinced that nobody even breathed. Finally, Jackie spoke.
“Yep. All good. So, um, if you ladies can continue thinking up some form of line or title we can use or something while you’re finishing off that immigration data, and Nina if you can just forward me the protocol for Nicky’s visit again so I can read over it, then that would be great,” she said, her body almost frozen in place and her face wearing a fake smile.
Deciding not to push it any further, Brooke simply nodded and walked back to her desk. It wasn’t long before Vanessa was following behind, rolling her own wheely chair along to sit beside her.
“What d’you think all that was about?” she whispered, leaning her elbows on Brooke’s desk expectantly. Brooke couldn’t help but stifle a laugh- Vanessa could be such a gossip and it was one of the things that was oddly endearing about her. Trying not to be too taken in by her perfume and parted lips, Brooke instead threw up her defences again and rolled her eyes.
“I don’t know, ‘Ness. To be honest, it’s not my place to ask. It’s not yours either,” she chastised softly, hitting Vanessa gently on the nose with her pen. Wrinkling her nose and pulling away, Vanessa shrugged.
“You’re right, I know. Still, she was kinda rattled. Hope she’s okay,” Vanessa frowned, nibbling on her bottom lip.
“She’ll be fine. Honestly. Just go and do your damn job.”
“Hmm. Winding you up’s more fun, baby, but I’ll do what I’m told,” Vanessa winked at her, shooting back off to her desk in her chair.
Feeling her heart speed up, Brooke fleetingly wondered if maybe the feelings she had for Vanessa weren’t entirely one-sided. That was flirting, right? Brooke wasn’t reading too much into it? Or maybe she was. Reality brought her back down to earth with a bump, telling her what a ridiculous thought that was. Vanessa saw Brooke as a friend and a co-worker, and that was where her feelings ended. Brooke couldn’t let herself get carried away or distracted with the idea that Vanessa would ever treat her as anything more than what they already were.
Letting out a huge exhale of breath, Brooke opened up the immigration spreadsheet and was about to start working when there was a thud of two elbows on the empty space to her left. Turning slowly in an attempt to conceal her flinching, she was met with Yvie; head in her hands, black dreads cascading over her shoulders and a huge, smug grin on her face.
“Don’t even say a word,” Brooke warned her, clearly too late as Yvie began sniggering a laugh behind her hands.
“I wasn’t actually here to gloat, but now you mention it…” Yvie joked, lolling lazily against Brooke’s desk. “So you’ve not admitted anything to anyone else. In fact, you’re probably maintaining the fact that there’s nothing to admit. But you’ve definitely admitted something to yourself, because I think your face is so red that you could go stand at a street corner and act as a traffic light.”
“If you keep talking, I’m going to staple your mouth shut,” Brooke glared, grabbing the stapler on her desk for emphasis. It didn’t seem to intimidate Yvie at all, who was still grinning maniacally and completely unfazed.
“Hey, like I said! Not here to gloat at all. I’m actually not here to talk about your deep feelings for your coworker in any way. Just thought you might like to know that Akeria texted me this a couple minutes ago.”
With that, Yvie produced her phone and held it out to Brooke so that she could read the screen.
A: ahahaha yeah. Big Silk with the fuckin bodyshots man!! Don’t actually know how she made it in today. Also, 100% confirmed Nicky’s looking for stuff to take Jackie down with bc she’s still pissed about that dig in the Von’Du interview. watch ur back xo
Attempting to ignore whatever conversation that had been going on before, Brooke focussed on the important information. She wished she could say she was surprised by the shadow minister’s plan but in all honesty, she’d highly expected it. Sighing, Brooke handed Yvie her phone back.
“I mean, I’m not too worried. What can she possibly dig up? Jackie will’ve been vetted by Bianca already,” she shrugged, clicking on a single cell of the spreadsheet half-heartedly.
“She got pizza delivered to the office last week?”
“That’s not even- Yvie. Come on,” Brooke raised one eyebrow in disbelief. “The papers would be hard pressed to conjure up a paragraph on that. Jackie will be fine.”
Appearing to be satisfied, Yvie pushed herself off the desk and made to return to her seat, but not before turning back to Brooke with the same smug look on her face as before.
“You know, I don’t think anyone in the office could’ve missed that wink Vanjie gave you just there. Whatever you’re feeling, I don’t think it’s as one-sided as you think,” she smirked, making sure to keep her voice low. Unsure of what to reply, Brooke simply narrowed her eyes, picked up her stapler and clicked it twice in warning. Chuckling, Yvie sauntered back to her desk.
Trying not to even entertain the thought that Vanessa could like her back, Brooke continued with her work. All of the numbers suddenly seemed scrambled and jumbled up, making no sense to her whatsoever. Feeling as if she was about to scream with frustration she made to ask Jan for advice until she noticed her desk was empty. Come to think of it, Jan hadn’t actually left the meeting room with her and Vanessa. Bullshit if she was getting away with doing nothing while Brooke worked on this entire set of figures by herself. Getting up and smoothing her skirt down she made her way to the meeting room only to find it empty. Puzzled, she began to walk slightly aimlessly down the corridor, her curiosity piqued at the disappearance of both Jan and Jackie. It was unlike Jan to just wander off without telling either Brooke or Vanessa where she was going.
Reaching the photocopier and a dead end with no Jan in sight, Brooke was about to give up and ask Nina for help instead when she heard two sets of muffled voices coming from the stationery cupboard.  
“I’m just panicking, I know. But I feel like I have good reason to. I mean, it’s going to be absolute carnage if this gets out.”
“It won’t, don’t worry. I still can’t believe Bianca missed that when she vetted you. But please don’t panic, it’ll all be fine! I’ll speak to Nina and I’ll get her to quietly cancel it.”
Jackie and Jan. What the hell were they in the stationery cupboard for, and most importantly, what were they talking about? Whatever it was, it sounded serious. If it was serious business, Brooke deserved to know. Making to burst open the door in a show of outrage, she stopped herself when Jackie’s voice spoke again.
“I just feel like such a failure. I should’ve known it would get out, I should’ve said something-”
“Hey! You are not a failure,” Jan’s voice cut in urgently. There was an odd sort of pause in which Brooke wasn’t quite sure what was happening. “You’re a good person, Jackie, and a kick-ass politician. You’re the best thing to happen to this department since I arrived, even if I do say so myself.”
Soft laughter, then Jan’s voice again. “You’re incredible. Don’t ever doubt that.”
Another pause. Brooke couldn’t quite bring herself to move, somehow feeling as if she shouldn’t be hearing this at all. Composing herself, she rested her hand on the door handle.
“Jan I…this might seem inappropriate, but-”
“Okay, what the hell is going on in here?” Brooke demanded as she flung open the door and revealed herself. Both girls seemed to jump back a bit, Jackie looking to the floor awkwardly and rubbing the back of her neck, Jan’s mouth forming a perfect circle as her jaw dropped in shock. They had both gone bright red, which Brooke thought was odd for two colleagues having a professional conversation.
“Jesus, Brooke, you scared the crap out of me,” Jackie breathed out raggedly, her voice spooked but holding an underlying note of irritation.  
“I don’t care, you haven’t answered my question. What were you talking about? What’s going to be carnage?” Brooke replied, keeping her glare cold. Jackie kept her eyes trained on the floor, not seeming to want to look up anytime soon. Jan still hadn’t spoken.
“Close the door,” Jackie said finally, sounding a little shaken. Feeling the wind slightly knocked out of her sails, Brooke did as she was told and watched as Jackie steadied herself on the shelf and sat on an unopened box.
“Um. Do you remember I kind of went off grid after uni? A lot of people were asking after me and couldn’t really find me.”
With a pang of guilt, Brooke’s first reaction was that she hadn’t really cared. She’d been glad to see the back of Jackie at the time, if she was honest. Times had changed, though, so Brooke simply nodded instead. Jackie wrung her hands together, her face completely racked with nerves.
“I wasn’t in a good place. My mental health spiralled out of control pretty dramatically once I graduated, I struggled to find a job for a while and when I did, I got way too into it. I would work myself into a frenzy, I’d do consecutive days on two hours of sleep…at one point I was averaging a panic attack per day. I didn’t really, um. I didn’t really have anyone to talk to about things. I tried going to therapy but it just didn’t help. I don’t know…it felt like I was making progress just being able to know that I was visiting someone, I guess, but I wasn’t really. Anyway, you don’t need to know my sob story,” Jackie frowned, shaking her head repeatedly. “To cut a long story short, I was driving into work one day, trying to do twenty things at once as usual. It was idiotic, but I was on the motorway and a text came through from my boss and wanting to seem like I was organised and in control, I tried to type and drive at the same time…the motorway was quiet, there was nobody around me…fuck, sorry-”
As Jackie’s voice broke slightly, Jan crossed over to where she sat and rested a gentle hand on her shoulder.
“I crashed into the barricade in the central reservation doing fifty miles an hour. God knows how I’m still alive. The police obviously came along with the ambulance and the fire brigade and of course they wanted to know how it was that I managed to crash on a clear stretch of road with no other drivers around me. I’ve never been able to lie to save myself, so I just told them. I’d only passed my test the year before that, so they took my license away. That’s why I can’t do the PR thing. It’s illegal for me to drive. I got a fake license purely so I could take this job.”
Leaning against the door, Brooke felt she wanted to sit down too. This was so much to deal with. She couldn’t style herself out as not caring about this, because she actually felt sick to her stomach with guilt. She couldn’t believe Jackie had coped- or not coped- completely on her own through all this horrible mess. Even though there was no way she could have known, Brooke just wished she could’ve done something differently. She desperately hoped Jackie was better now.
“Jackie, I’m so sorry.”
“No, no, don’t be sorry. This isn’t about me being…enormously god damn mental in the head, or whatever,” she snorted a derisive laugh. “I’m more worried about how we’re going to placate Bianca. Jan said she’d talk to Nina and get her to cancel the shoot but Bianca’s going to ask questions.”
“Well it’s not your fault she didn’t vet you properly,” Brooke shrugged, how Bianca would feel the absolute last thing on her mind right now. “So she can just deal with it. How Bianca feels doesn’t matter. What matters is that you’re okay.”
Jackie looked up at her, her face grateful but slightly taken aback at this raw show of compassion. Truthfully, Brooke was also slightly shocked at how kind she was being towards her. She was grateful for the shout that came from the hall suddenly.
“Brooke? Guys? You in there?” Vanessa asked, as she opened the door and stepped inside the stationery cupboard that was ever-decreasing in space. Confused by the presence of her boss and the two other advisors, her perfect eyebrows became furrowed together. “There some meeting I didn’t know about?”
“Yeah, in the stationery cupboard. It was really important, girl, did you not get the memo?” Jan laughed affectionately. Laughing briefly at her own ridiculous assumption, Vanessa then tentatively looked at everyone else again.
“So…why we all here?”
Brooke briefly looked at Jackie, then sighed. “Jackie can’t do the PR stunt because legally, she’s not allowed to drive. She got done for texting while driving years ago and her license got revoked.”
Vanessa’s mouth dropped open a little as if she was about to ask how, then shut again as she clearly decided against it. “Does Bianca know?”
Giving her an affectionate smile, Brooke raised her eyebrows at her. “V. Come on. Use your brain.”
“Fuck, ‘course not. I’m so not with it today. So what’s happenin’?”
“Jan’s telling Nina to cancel it and when Bianca finds out, we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it. What’s important here is Jackie,” Brooke said decisively. Shocked again at the vulnerability she was showing, she smoothed down her black pencil skirt and sniffed once, trying to ignore just how close Vanessa was in the tiny space. “So that’s settled. Can we all get out of this cupboard and do some damn work? I feel like I’m suffocating.”
Without speaking, the four girls filed out of the cupboard as if the conversation had never happened. Brooke’s head was still slightly spinning as she slumped back in her chair, the excel spreadsheet now more confusing than ever. She was still attempting to take in everything that Jackie had just told her. It was so much to process, and Brooke couldn’t shake the guilty feeling that was settling in the pit of her stomach, the feeling that maybe there was something she could have done to help all those years ago. Sighing, she cast her eyes to Jackie’s glass-fronted office where the Minister was now typing into her phone, her face failing to betray anything about the heartfelt conversation that had just taken place. Why the hell did Jackie have to confide in her like that? Life would be so much less stressful if everybody just kept their guard up like Brooke did.
Still, she mused, everyone would probably be a whole lot more lonely.    
Suddenly, Brooke’s phone screen lit up with three messages at once- two from Jan, one from Vanessa.
J: I would love to, that sounds amazing (: we could go for sushi?? Wardour Street has some really nice places! Xxx
J: whoops wasn’t meant for you lol sorry
Brooke would probably have been about ten times more intrigued and curious about Jan’s text if she didn’t have a text from Vanessa awaiting her.  
V: I don’t care what kind of front you try to put up, you’re kind and caring and a total sweetheart x
Not even daring to look up and risk meeting Vanessa’s eyes, Brooke reached for a piece of paper on her desk and began to fan the blush that had just flooded her cheeks. Trying her best not to think about what Yvie had said earlier, she began to compose a reply.
B: You’re a cutie. Don’t tell anyone I was nice to you though, being a bitch is kind of my brand x
Risking a peek up over her monitor, Brooke watched as Vanessa picked up her phone and giggled, covering her mouth with one perfectly manicured hand.
God, it was going to be a long day.
***
They had arrived.
Brooke felt like a bird of prey as she stood beside Jan and watched from above as Nicky and her two advisors were greeted by Nina in the lobby. Even from six floors up Brooke could tell that Nina was hating the fact that she had to be at the very least civil to the three opposition members. Narrowing her eyes, Brooke watched closer.
Nicky was using the tactic she employed every time she had a television interview; gushing about how happy she was to be here, playing the humble, meek elected representative of the people. She was wearing an immaculate navy pencil dress with what appeared to be a Tiffany heart around her neck, and her sleek blonde hair was piled on top of her head in a bun. Following dutifully behind her were two others. The first girl Brooke heard before she saw- a cry of excitement at being in the building had been the very thing that proclaimed the arrival of the opposition. She was still making an obscene amount of excitable noise which travelled up the floors of the lobby as if it was riding the elevator. Squawker- or Crystal, Brooke supposed she should call her- was equally well turned out. She gave off a clear professional vibe in her button-down shirt, blue skirt and little heeled boots, and her curly red hair was swept over one shoulder.
“Gigi needs her roots done. See?” Brooke whispered to Jan, not taking her eyes off the three opposition members. Receiving no response, Brooke turned to look at her friend. Jan’s shoulders were tensed up as she trained her eyes on the member of the opposition in question. Her style was immaculate and she wore a pressed white shirt with huge sleeves and a pair of smart tailored black trousers with her high heels. Her long, blonde hair had been immaculately styled and blow-dried, and Brooke found herself wondering how or if she had the time to do that every day. Looking to Jan again she found her brow furrowed, biting at her long, painted nails.  
“Jan, come on. Don’t ruin your nails, you’re better than that,” Brooke scolded, grabbing gently at Jan’s wrist and pulling it away from her face. Jan finally turned to meet her eyes before looking quickly back down at the floor again. “Hey. Talk to me.”
Sighing, Jan leant against the balcony, watching as the opposition were led away to the lift. “Sorry. I know I’m not myself today. It’s just this is really, really freaking me out. It’s not like this is the first time I’ve seen these girls since I crossed the floor, but to have them here where I work? It’s just a lot. It sounds dramatic but like…it kind of feels violating, if that makes any sense?”
Brooke nodded slowly. “I know you’re worried about it. But you’re being really brave about the whole thing. And hey, you kind of have an advantage, I guess! They’re on your territory, they’re not familiar or comfortable with anything here. Mainly because nothing’s engulfed by the flames of hell or costs over £10,000.”
Snorting a brief laugh, Jan’s face grew somewhat blank again. “I mean. Their tanks are on our lawn, though, they know we’re shook.”
Rolling her eyes, Brooke laughed derisively. “Jan. These private school bitches are not going to take power. You live in this country at the moment, do you really think the public are going to vote for people like Nicky?”
“Well, the public are idiots.”
Brooke gave a snort. “Jan, you can’t say the entire nation are idiots.”
“Yes I can, I’ve met them,” Jan deadpanned, signing off with a smile. Brooke relaxed against the balcony, comforted by the fact that Jan clearly felt a little better.
“Listen. One single day. One day of smiling and nodding like a puppet and just taking whatever crap or snide comments or shade they throw at you. You’ve handled so much worse,” Brooke smiled reassuringly, resting both hands on Jan’s shoulders. Comforted, Jan made to turn back to the department when suddenly she whipped her head back round.
“Brooke,” she murmured. “What if they find out about Jackie?”
“What, that she exists? I know it was a crushing disappointment to us all but they’ll get over it some day,” she deadpanned. Jan gave a colossal roll of her eyes.
“No, you bitch! The license thing,” Jan sighed in exasperation, raising her voice just a little.
Brooke paused for a moment. It was weird how protective Jan was of her boss. She was never like that with Darienne at all. Fair enough Jackie was far more competent but still, it wasn’t as if the two shared some deep personal connection or anything. Brooke thought about asking her about it, but instead decided that that probably wasn’t what Jan needed right at this very moment.  
“Who’s going to tell them? Me? You? Vanessa? Jackie herself? We’re the only ones that know. Come on, Jan, think,” Brooke tapped the side of Jan’s head once, punctuating her point. “It’s not going to get out.”
Smiling slightly, Jan seemed to compose herself and took one deep breath. As if something had occurred to her, she let out a laugh.
“God, what’s happening to you, Brooke? First you’re nice to Jackie for once and then you listen to me vent for ages. Your cracks are showing,” Jan smiled. Brooke attempted to style it out by shrugging, secretly a little unnerved that her recent empathy was being noticed.
“Stop psychoanalysing me, psycho, and let’s get back to our desks.”
No sooner had both girls turned the corner towards their office when they came face to face with the three members of the opposition coming out of the lift, Nina leading them. Jan immediately froze in place, seemingly unable to move. Brooke wanted to do something, anything to reassure her but before she could even look at Jan, Gigi’s cold grey eyes met her own.
“Nicky,” she turned to her boss, her cheerful, light voice at odds with the stare she was giving Brooke. “You go on ahead with Nina. Crystal and I are just going to have a little catch-up with a couple of old friends we haven’t seen in a while.”
Brooke wasn’t easily intimidated and she swore that today would be no different. As Gigi and Crystal advanced towards them, she drew her shoulders back and tilted her head, not giving a single thing away on her face. She could feel Jan growing more and more timid beside her. Christ, if these girls were planning on giving her friend a hard time then they’d be leaving the department in an ambulance.
“Brooke Lynn. Jan! So good to see you both,” Gigi began, her smile smug as she rested one nonchalant hand on her hip. “God, how long has it been? When was the last time we saw these two, Crystal?”
“Gee, Gigi, I don’t know! Did they not serve us at McDonalds when we went to get nuggets a couple days ago?” Crystal chimed in, flashing a quick, amused smile at her friend. Brooke muffled a derisive laugh as she shook her head. She couldn’t quite believe the schoolyard bullshit that these adult women were trying to start in her department. Still, if this was the game they were playing, then Brooke would play accordingly.
“Clever, implying that we’re both in minimum wage retail sector jobs! Something which your party loves to shit on very often. I love it,” Brooke smiled sweetly, gently clapping her hands. Gigi gave a fake laugh.
“Ladies, relax! It’s just some classic cross-party fun, no harm meant by it. You know that, right, Jan?” she flashed her a false smile. Brooke watched as Jan, shoulders now so hunched she was practically concave, gave a meek nod in response.
“You know, we really miss you, Jan,” Crystal nodded somberly, her voice high and sweet and almost-but-not-quite masking the fake sincerity behind her words. “Nicky’s always saying how open she’d be to having you back if you’d ever want to cross the floor…again! Gigi and I miss you too. We miss our friend.”
With that, Crystal reached a hand out and touched Jan’s arm gently. Flinching a little, Jan finally met her former colleague’s eyes and gave a weak smile. Brooke felt a flame of anger sting her veins as she watched the whole interaction. It was the same every time Jan ran into these two- they would start with the bitchy high school bullshit and Jan would be unable to ignore it, growing more and more quiet and subdued with every passing comment. Fuelled by her anger and dislike of behaviour of the two girls in front of her, Brooke snorted sardonically.
“Friend? Spare me the bullshit, you’d stab yourself in the back if it meant you got ten more followers on Instagram. Now if you’ll excuse us, we need to get back to work. You know, being in power? But this has been lovely,” Brooke flashed her bright white teeth in a smile, which Gigi returned equally as insincerely. “I haven’t had the conversational equivalent of hepatitis C in a long time.”
“As always, Brooke, you’re a very funny girl. Quite the comedian,” Gigi gave a tight-lipped smile as she stepped to one side and cleared a path down the corridor for the two girls. Hooking her arm through Jan’s, Brooke began to leave and had taken roughly three steps when she yelled her retort over her shoulder.
“I’ve got a lot of jokes, but none as good as your boss!”
Still fuelled from the frustration coursing through her veins, Brooke steered Jan the rest of the way down the hall and into the small kitchen like a demented steam train. It was only after she flicked the switch on the kettle so hard she thought she might have broken it when Jan spoke.
“I know they annoy you, babe, but don’t be too hard on them.”
“Don’t be too…Jan! They were standing there making you feel like a sack of shit, I wasn’t going to sit back and let them rip you to shreds! God, I can’t believe you’re defending them,” Brooke cried, grabbing two mugs and two teabags so hard she felt they might crumble apart in her hands. Silent for only a moment, Jan began playing with the edge of a tea towel, deep in thought.
“They were my friends once though. Who knows, maybe…maybe they were being serious. Maybe they do want to be friends again.”
As the kettle reached boiling point, Brooke took one deep, calming breath and began pouring them cups of tea. Part of her hated the way that she’d been conditioned into going straight to the kettle when something was angering or upsetting either her or her friends, as if a ridiculous hot drink was going to help make things any better. Vodka, now that would go some way to really help the situation. If Brooke and Jan shared a 75cl bottle, they’d be able to get so wasted that those idiots from the opposition wouldn’t bother them anymore. The bottle would also be ideal for smashing over Gigi’s smug face. Too bad it was too early for alcohol, Brooke mused, as she handed the smaller girl a steaming hot mug of tea. As Jan gave a grateful smile and began to sip, Brooke found herself wishing she could knock some sense into her. One of Jan’s biggest strengths was very feasibly also her biggest weakness; her determination to always focus on the good in people, to ignore their flaws and instead choose to look at their positives. It was something that made Jan such a horrendous judge of character. Christ, she’d worked for the opposition for a year, after all.
Casting another glance at her friend and deciding she’d visibly gained back a little of her confidence, Brooke grabbed her own mug off the countertop.
“Right, come on,” she said decisively. “We’re going to go back to our desks and drink these up and get on with our work, because these snakes that have slithered into the department don’t change a single thing about how capable you are as a professional. Okay?”
With a stifled smile Jan led the way back to the office, leaving Brooke wondering if she could still maintain the bitchy façade she always presented to the world if she was getting this good at cheering people up.
***
Sadly that wasn’t the only encounter they had to suffer with the opposition that day. Nicky soon appeared in the department’s offices with Nina, almost as a grand finale to the tour of Dosac she’d been given so far. She watched with narrowed eyes as Nicky made her way from desk to desk of the comms team, shaking hands and smiling in a sickeningly sweet manner that made Brooke want to hurl. Gigi and Crystal hovered behind Nicky’s shoulders like little cartoon devils and angels, except in Brooke’s opinion neither of them had many angelic qualities about them.
Attempting to ignore the gatecrashers in her office, Brooke turned back to her monitor. She supposed that maybe both Gigi and Crystal were pleasant people. Perhaps even Nicky at a push. They might still have been fun and friendly people to hang out with, after all, the politics they followed didn’t define them. Suddenly remembering a very obvious exception (Hitler), Brooke sent another withering glare the opposition’s way. Hit with another pang of doubt, she reasoned that comparing Nicky Doll to Hitler was perhaps an overreaction. Tuning out of the immigration stats that sat in front of her, Brooke instead found herself listening in to the conversation between Nicky and Nina.
“The space here is lovely. Very professional, very focused. There’s maybe about twenty-five percent that I’m not okay with, though. I think I’d prefer isolation booths for everybody to work in- it’ll keep everyone more on task,” Nicky asserted, Brooke noticing out the corner of her eye how Yvie and Scarlet both recoiled in horror at the thought of not being able to chat and keep each other going throughout the day.
“Okay, so you’d prefer isolation booths in addition to the longer working hours of 8.30am til 7pm, and only half an hour for lunch,” Nina confirmed. Her hair was twice as big and frizzy as it usually was, probably as a result of tearing half of it out in frustration after the amount of hours she’d spent with Nicky.
“Christ, does she want us chained to the phones as well?” Adore mumbled. Brooke immediately tensed up- if she had heard that comment, then Nicky definitely had too. Sure enough, Nicky whipped her head round and stared Adore straight in the eye.
“That’s very funny, but no. I would not be chaining people to phones, I would simply be employing popular and common tactics that are used by employers the world over. Something which you wouldn’t have to worry about, because I wouldn’t have you working for me,” she smiled fake-sweetly, her voice getting more and more clipped as she reached the end of her sentence.
Brooke found herself praying that the opposition would never reach any position of power whatsoever if they were going to have this tiny dictator running the department. Adore had slunk down into her wheely chair, as if trying to make herself invisible. Suddenly, Brooke heard Jackie’s office door open behind her.
“What the hell is going on out here?” she muttered as she reached Brooke’s desk, looking straight at the visitors to the department. Glad of an opportunity to relieve the tension, Nina once again plastered the fake smile on her face.
“Minister, may I introduce your opposite number, Shadow Minister Nicky Doll,” she smiled at Jackie, waving a hand at Nicky as if she was unveiling a booby prize on a game show.
It was interesting to watch how the two women regarded each other. Nicky immediately narrowed her eyes, pursing her lips together in a display of agitation at no longer being the highest authority in the room. She made no show of moving to shake Jackie’s hand, in fact she didn’t appear to want to speak to Jackie at all. Instead, Jackie herself made the first move and stepped forward once, twice, finally reaching a safe distance and holding out a hand for Nicky to shake. Her face was placid and gave nothing away. Almost Sleeping Beauty-esque, Brooke thought.
“Nicky, it’s so good to finally meet you properly,” she smiled calmly as Nicky gingerly took her hand to shake. “I hope you and your team have had a good day in the department?”
“Oh yes, it’s been lovely. Although obviously there are a number of things that will need changed once we get into power!” Nicky gave a fake little laugh, her eyes still hostile.
“Well. If,” Jackie wrinkled her nose in a smile, which Nicky returned sourly.
Brooke was suddenly distracted by a buzz from her phone. Yvie.
Y: Christ there’s more fake smiles in here than the outpatients’ at a fucking plastic surgery
If Brooke had been in the mood she probably would have been howling with laughter, but the tense, uncomfortable conversation was still taking place.
“I found it interesting that you chose to highlight my disagreement with Manila Luzon in your interview with Chad Michaels. I felt it slightly undermined your point about the need to raise other women in politics up when you yourself were clearly intent on taking me down,” Nicky continued to smile falsely, the bitter undertone to her words not going unnoticed by Brooke. Jackie kept calm, smiling lazily back and raising her eyes to the ceiling.
“Oh, I don’t know about undermining my point. In order to make a good argument, you have to present some evidence to back it up, and that’s all I was doing. I’m sure you understand it was nothing personal,” she said, giving a little nod.
Nicky flared her nostrils, her face now unimpressed as she swept a hand through her hair, rendering her bun a little messy. “Well. It was lovely to meet you anyway, Jackie, but I still have numerous issues to talk through with Nina. If you’ll excuse me.”
With that, Nicky turned on her heel, not even bothering to wait for a reply. On her way back to Nina, she stopped to murmur something in Gigi’s ear, which then resulted in Gigi marching round the corner. Brooke could have followed her up, but was too distracted by Jackie coming to hover at her desk.
“Numerous issues? I’ll bet she has numerous fucking issues, God. Let’s hope that lot never get into power, she’s more unhinged than a flat pack IKEA cupboard,” Jackie whispered, causing Brooke to splutter a laugh. Jackie smirked at her reaction, then her face grew suddenly serious. “Did you know if Nina managed to get that photo op cancelled?”
“She did it about half an hour after we spoke. Jan really got on her back about it, so it was pretty impossible for Nina to wriggle out of it,” Brooke explained offhandedly, trying in vain to focus on her work. Looking up, she noticed that Jackie seemed to have a faraway look on her face.
“She’s so good, isn’t she? Jan. She’s just incredible. So organised and on it,” Jackie said quietly to no-one in particular. Confused, Brooke simply nodded. Apparently remembering where she was, Jackie cleared her throat, smoothed her skirt down and returned to her office.
Around ten minutes later, Brooke thought she was making some real headway with the persisting immigration data. That was until she almost jumped out of her skin when she felt a hand come crashing down on her shoulder. Spinning around rapidly in her wheely chair she was shocked to see Bianca looming above her, her face grave as her eyes met Brooke’s.
“Bianca, holy fuck. You scared the crap out of me,” Brooke sighed, Bianca not even cracking a smile as her grip on Brooke’s shoulder tightened and she escorted her out of the room. Brooke’s stomach churned as she was led out into the corridor. What the hell was happening, or what the hell had happened, or what the hell was about to happen?
The bright white light of the corridor contrasted violently with Bianca’s expression, which was the personification of the wrath of God itself. She was silent for a moment, which prompted Brooke to tentatively speak first.
“So, um. Why did you want to see-”
“I want to know why a certain Sasha Belle over at transport now has the very same PR stunt I very nearly passed a kidney stone to secure for Jackie,” Bianca snapped. Her voice was cold and low, and Brooke felt goosebumps prickle over her skin just hearing her speak. She felt conflicted. Half of her wanted to reveal Jackie’s personal reasons for having backed out; it was a legitimate excuse and might even make Bianca feel some form of remorse, God willing. On the other hand, it was a part of Jackie’s life which Brooke was sure she wanted to leave behind, and if more and more people knew about it, well. That would make it increasingly hard to forget. Biting her lip, she tried to tell a white lie.
“She had personal reasons for backing out. We decided as her team of advisors that it would be best if she didn’t go through with it.”
“I don’t give a rat’s ass what deeply held personal fucking reasons she had against it, it is her JOB to go to photo ops, it is her JOB to give herself media coverage!”
“Well she couldn’t even if you wanted her to. Not legally anyway,” Brooke found herself saying, her voice too loud in the echoey hallway. Bianca raised her eyebrows a little, as if urging Brooke to go on. Slightly regretting having not simply kept her mouth shut, Brooke continued.
“Jackie had her driving license revoked. It was years ago- she was texting while driving and crashed on the motorway. So even if she wanted to do the damn publicity, she couldn’t,” she explained, sighing as Bianca’s face slowly took on a look of realisation. “I don’t know how you didn’t already know this, Bianca. Her license was fake, I don’t get how that slipped by you. I thought you did background checks on everyone that came within a five mile radius of the party.”
Bianca exhaled loudly, slowly running one hand down her face. She opened her mouth to speak, then shut it, then opened it again.
“When I asked you about Jackie, it wasn’t just a casual, out-of-interest enquiry. We were seriously fucking desperate. We had nothing on her, nothing on her at all apart from the fact that we knew she had a degree in politics and she’d been around the stock exchange for years. We were just desperate to get Darienne out of the party and stop the fucking spiral of madness she was driving us all down. Her position had become toxic, Brooke Lynn, nobody we approached about the job would touch it. So we needed somebody unknown, someone who wouldn’t know or understand who she was succeeding. That’s why we failed to do intensive background checks. I mean, we established that Jackie hadn’t murdered or stabbed anyone, for Christ’s sake. But everything else we had to skim over. We couldn’t have had Darienne in her job for any longer, it would have just…it would have just killed the party.”
Brooke could sort of understand where Bianca was coming from. Taking a calming breath, she suddenly felt the panic rise up in her throat again. “But Bianca, if this gets to the papers-”
Bianca cut her off, holding a single hand up in front of her face and looking down the corridor with suspicion. Wordlessly, she walked to the double doors at the end of the corridor and wrenched them open. Behind them stood Gigi, who jumped at the sudden movement.
“Oh. Hello Bianca. I was just, uh. Trying to find the toilets. This department is like a damn labyrinth, you know?” she laughed awkwardly, almost paralysed under Bianca’s glare.
“Do you want a massive cup to press against the door too, or are you good?” she quipped dryly.
Brooke’s heart began to palpitate nervously. Gigi had clearly been behind that door and listening for quite some time. How long, she didn’t know. But if she’d heard the reason why Jackie couldn’t drive, this was all different kinds, shades, textures and flavours of bad.
“Bianca, really. All I heard was that Jackie wasn’t exactly vetted properly. Which, you know, could be kind of a big story in itself, I think,” Gigi smiled cunningly. All at once, Brooke wanted to laugh. Attempting to get the upper hand on Bianca Del Rio was an interesting tactic, one which basically ensured you weren’t going to win. Deciding to step back, Brooke let Bianca take the reins.
“Oh, I see! You were looking for a story! Well here, here’s a great one for you,” Bianca smiled sinisterly, putting Brooke in mind of a predator about to pounce. “Did you know that Jaqueline Cox is sitting in that office there despite the fact her driving license got revoked? She crashed her car on the motorway because she tried to text and drive at the same time. Did you not know that?”
Brooke watched as Gigi’s face lit up at the revelation. She had to admit she didn’t really know where Bianca was going with this or what she had to gain from revealing the information to one of the Shadow Minister’s aides. As Brooke attempted to interject, Bianca simply turned and fixed her with a smile.
“You didn’t know that, no?” she asked Gigi again. She simply shook her head, delighted at what had just been revealed. “Oh, wait, of course…you wouldn’t know that! Because the only people who do know that are, um, Miss Cox…her three advisors…and me. If this information got to the press…I would know that it came from you.”
Brooke wanted to practically jump for joy as she saw Gigi’s face fall, growing very apprehensive as Bianca took two steps towards her. Her voice lowering, Bianca continued the onslaught.
“And I would rain down upon you so hard that your body would have to be re-assembled by crash team investigators-” she hissed. Gigi opened her mouth to defend herself and Bianca immediately stopped her. “- do not fucking interrupt me, girl. Now, you breathe a word of this to ANYONE, you fucking living toothpick, and I will-”
Already shaking with laughter, Brooke ducked her head out of the door and ran into the offices.
“Jan! ‘Ness! Come quick. Bianca’s going off on one at Gigi,” she stage-whispered, the two girls looking up, bemused but quickly following Brooke back to the corridor doors nonetheless. The double doors were fronted with a small pane of clear glass, which the three girls all peered through to see Bianca continuing to verbally grill Gigi, now far less composed than she was before.
“…I will eviscerate you, right? And I mean, I don’t have your education, I don’t know what that means. But I’ll start by plucking your eyes out and I’ll busk it from there. Okay? Glad we’re agreed. Have a great day.”
As Gigi stumbled back down the hall in a daze as if she’d just crawled out of an avalanche, the three girls on the other side of the door tried to compose themselves after their laughing fit.
“Bianca has such a way with words,” Jan mused, wiping tears from her eyes. “So why was she yelling at Gigi, what had she done? Looked at her?”
Brooke explained what had happened to the two girls, watching as their facial expressions shifted from confused, to fearful, then some semblance of reassured. There was still an aspect that was a little panicked, however, the knowledge that Gigi knew about Jackie’s past clearly worrying them both.  
“Look, don’t give it too much thought. Bianca has it all under control. She always does,” Brooke reassured them, shrugging as she walked back to her desk.
“Guess I’m happy to trust Bianca,” Vanessa smiled, relaxing a little. “Hey, you ladies had lunch yet?”
“Not yet. Pret?” Brooke offered, Vanessa smiling beautifully and picking up her bag from her chair. Brooke didn’t miss how Jan simply nodded silently, her face still troubled, clearly not as trusting of Bianca as Vanessa was.
***
As the three girls sat huddled around Jan’s desk eating their lunch, Brooke watched as Vanessa scoffed down her messy meatball panini with marinara sauce and mozzarella cheese that oozed out the side and made long, inconvenient strings. She could have teased Vanessa for her shambles of a lunch but she decided against it, instead choosing to compliment her.
“‘Ness, how can you eat literally whatever you want and still look so good?” Brooke asked, attempting to look offhanded but still feeling like her guts were made of jelly as the words came out her mouth. It was hugely tiresome how much more nervous and self-aware she was around Vanessa now that she’d actually acknowledged her crush on her. It was much harder to pretend things were purely platonic if she gave her a compliment.
In response, Vanessa simply smiled bashfully and shrugged, her mouth full of food. “Hey, I always wonder the same thing about you, baby. I’d kill to look like you.”
“With these thighs? Girl, no you wouldn’t,” Brooke snorted, trying to keep herself from blushing.
“You got good thighs,” Vanessa insisted, making Brooke wonder just how much attention Vanessa paid to her legs. Snapping out of it, Brooke told herself that she was probably just being kind. After a beat of silence, Jan cut in.
“Well, I know both of you find me wildly attractive and are also madly jealous of my amazing figure, which is why neither of you have said anything,” she joked through a mouthful of salmon salad. Brooke gave her a playful shove, shocked when she heard a little cry.
“Jesus, Jan! It wasn’t that sore.”
“That wasn’t me. That came from Jackie’s office,” Jan said gravely, looking at the Minister’s office door where she could just see the blonde bun belonging to Nicky peering over the strip of frosted glass. Exchanging concerned looks, all three girls made their way over.
Brooke was the first to walk in and when her gaze met Jackie’s her heart sank. She was sitting behind her desk and had turned pale, her eyes frightened and huge in her face which had gone almost ghostly white. Turning her gaze to Nicky she noticed that the girl seemed smug in some way, as if she had the upper hand. In a moment, Brooke knew exactly what had happened.
Gigi had spilled.
“Miss Doll, you ain’t actually allowed in here. This is the Minister’s private office,” Vanessa began in a valiant effort to stick up for Jackie who was clearly past sticking up for herself.
“Oh, it’s quite alright. Jackie and I were just having a little chat. A little reminisce on the past, if you like. Well. Her past,” Nicky smiled, casting an amused gaze at Jackie whose face was ashen and defeated as she sat at her desk. Brooke suddenly felt herself overcome with fury.
“I hope you’re giving Gigi a big pay rise for that information. She won’t have much time to spend it though once Bianca finds out. I’d maybe give her two…three days left to live?” she hissed, her face contorted as she glared at the shadow minister.
“Brooke Lynn, is it?” Nicky addressed her, Brooke momentarily wondering how she knew her name. “Brooke Lynn. We all know what it’s like in politics. Unfortunately if someone has some information on someone else, it’s only natural that they’re going to exploit it. And that’s all that’s happening here! It’s not personal. Just professional.”
“Like hell are you exploiting anything,” Jan spat, her face dark. Come to think of it, Brooke had never really seen her so angry, but the tiny girl was like a spitfire as she narrowed her eyes at her old boss. “You know full well where to draw the line between personal and political information. If you leak this to the media then you’re more reprehensible than the party you represent.”
“I’m sorry ladies, but this is how you play the game, and I play to win. I’m not really prepared to discuss it any further,” Nicky rolled her eyes, picking up her bag from where it sat on Jackie’s desk.
Just as she made to leave, Nicky turned to see Bianca standing in the doorway of Jackie’s office, glancing with confusion at the scene in front of her.
“Bianca!” Vanessa cried, for once happy to see the Prime Minister’s enforcer. “We were just talkin’ about how Nicky maybe shouldn’t go to the papers about Jackie…? Telling them about her driving license? Tryin’ to think of a reason why this would reflect badly on her party in some way…?”
Brooke watched as Vanessa looked pleadingly at Bianca, willing her to do something, anything to spin them out of the situation. Bianca for her part seemed calm, upbeat even.
“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe she should! Good idea!” she shrugged, flashing a smile Nicky’s way as she turned and made to leave the room.
Vanessa’s face immediately dropped as if she’d been slapped. Jan’s expression was completely blank. Brooke didn’t know what to think. It seemed as if Jackie was holding her breath, and Nicky simply stood rooted to the spot, her eyes still on Bianca as if she knew there was more to come. Sure enough, Bianca reached the doorframe, stopped, and turned on her heel.
“Oh, shit, wait a minute! I know why she shouldn’t! Because you know, if she did that…she’d be dead,” Bianca said simply.
Brooke watched as Nicky blinked silently at her. Bianca continued to speak.
“To me. To her advisors. To her party. To the electorate. And the only job she’d get in power is for this government’s catering company sweeping up crumbs as a kitchen cleaner, because I’d call every journalist I know, which of course- that’s all of them! Isn’t it Nicole! And I’d tell them all that lovely little story I’ve had saved for a rainy day, about a certain Right Honourable Lord Doll- how is your Dad, by the way?- and how he enjoyed a lovely five years as a member of the Bullingdon Club at university, a club so fucking morally bankrupt they had a exposé film made about them! Of course, the homeless person your Dad had to burn money in the face of for his initiation- he didn’t enjoy it so much. Nor did the live pigeon he had to bite the head off of either. And I believe there’s also rumblings about…something about a pig, which I won’t go into. And so I’d quite happily email all these journalists any photos and soundbites and CCTV footage they wanted, because I’d say…I’d say that’s quite a big story. I’d say that would probably contest a Minister’s silly little eight-year-old car accident in the running order of the ten o’clock news. That’s what I’d tell her,” Bianca finally finished calmly, smiling a little at Nicky whose mouth was now hanging open like a goldfish. Turning to Vanessa, Bianca simply nodded on her way out of the door. “But maybe you should tell her!”
Catching Vanessa’s eye, Brooke couldn’t help but burst into a triumphant grin. Vanessa returned the smile, now completely relaxed knowing that Jackie had the upper hand. Nicky was still standing completely still and hadn’t moved since Bianca had left.
“I’ll, um. I’ll ask Nina to get your coat,” Jackie addressed Nicky pleasantly, sitting at her desk and pushing a single number on the phone as Nicky simply nodded wordlessly.
Brooke wanted to burst out laughing. Bianca had her enemies in Westminster, but she was also an absolute mastermind.
***
They had made it through the day. They always did, after all. They were a great team, Brooke thought, and God help them if they were ever disbanded in any way. Sitting in a quieter corner of the office with her head tipped against the head of the sofa, Brooke took a deep breath. It was often needed at the end of days like these. Jan sat to her right, curled up against the arm of the couch and simply staring into the distance. Thinking for a moment, Brooke turned her head and stared at Jan.
“Do you think Bianca really had all that stuff to back up what she said about Nicky’s Dad?”
Jan smirked and met Brooke’s eyes. “It’s Bianca. She’s a walking, talking database. She probably has shit on all of us. She probably knows stuff about us that we haven’t even done yet.”
Before Brooke could even try to get her head around Jan’s words, Vanessa joined them. She flung herself against the sofa dramatically, gently tilting her head so that it rested in the crook of Brooke’s shoulder. For a second she could barely breathe.
“I wonder what she’s going to do to Gigi when she next sees her. Can’t imagine I’d want to be in her six-inch heels right now,” Brooke continued, trying to talk through her breathlessness.
“We talkin’ about Bianca?” Vanessa murmured, nuzzling her head against Brooke’s shoulder to get comfortable. Christ, why the fuck did she have to do that?
“Yeah,” Jan smiled wistfully. “God, I’d be running for the hills if I was her. Alyssa’s charity ball is in three weeks, remember? I wouldn’t put it past Bianca to stage a live crucifixion as the night’s entertainment.”
Brooke felt Vanessa laugh softly against her side. She was such a warm, happy person, at least when she wasn’t stressing her head off at the latest party shambles. She was too good to be working here, but Brooke was so glad that she was.
“So you’re not going to be ditching us to run back to the opposition anytime soon then? Not going to be meeting up with Gigi and Crystal for a cute little catch-up coffee?” Brooke only half-joked, turning to address Jan again. She watched as Jan’s face grew a little dark, her brow furrowing as she let out a derisive laugh.
“I’m not fucking with anyone who attempts to sabotage Jackie’s career,” she said forebodingly.
There it was again, Brooke thought, this protective side to Jan which she’d never really seen before. She didn’t think she’d ever get over how strange it was.
Footsteps behind the sofa prompted all three of them to turn around. It was Jackie- she’d freshened up her makeup a little and had sprayed some deodorant or perfume or something that smelt nice. Reaching the sofa, she gave a warm smile to the three girls.
“Thanks for your support today, ladies,” she said sincerely, leaning on the back of the sofa. “It was a tough one, but we got there in the end.”
“Sorry that Nina couldn’t arrange an alternative bit of PR in time, Jackie,” Vanessa smiled apologetically. Jackie let out a small laugh.
“Are you kidding? That was a blessing in disguise. After the day I’ve had the last thing I want to do is go and feign interest in electric cars for an hour,” she shook her head. “Seriously though, thank you. You three are a total blessing.”
Brooke was surprised when she then turned to face Jan, her expression turning a little shy. “Ready to go?”
“Yeah, two minutes. I need to pack up and I’ll be good,” Jan smiled timidly back at her, her cheeks going a little red.
“Okay. I’ll wait at the lifts. See you tomorrow, girls,” Jackie said finally, waving goodbye to Brooke and Vanessa before walking away.
Vanessa tipped her head off Brooke’s shoulder to lean forward and look at Jan, who was grabbing her coat. “Where are you two off to then, Miss Ma’am?”
Jan stopped in her tracks, as if she hadn’t really been expecting the question. “Oh! Um, Jackie’s just giving me a lift home.”
Brooke screwed up her face at her friend. “A lift home? In her car? That she drives? Is that meant to be a joke?”
Seemingly realising her mistake, Jan smiled and shook her head. “I meant her driver. Her driver’s going to drop me home on the way back to Jackie’s.”
Brooke sat blankly for a moment, turning to Vanessa and seeing her face hold the exact same expression. Vanessa laughed in disbelief. “Your flat’s five minutes away, you lazy shit!”
“Hey, give me a break! I’m exhausted, a five minute walk is still a walk I don’t want to do, and I’ll take what I can get,” Jan shrugged, grabbing her bag and making to leave. “Bye, girls. See you both tomorrow.”
Brooke gave a tired reply as Jan made her way out of the department. Sighing, Vanessa leant against the arm of the sofa, kicking her legs over Brooke’s lap and subsequently causing Brooke’s pulse to quicken by about 90%. They sat in silence for a moment, Brooke’s brain too full to even contemplate starting a conversation. Luckily, it was Vanessa that spoke first.
“Do you think something’s goin’ on there? Between Jackie and Jan?”
Brooke paused. If it were any other situation, she’d maybe have thought Vanessa was right. But this was work, and sometimes people got incredibly passionate about their party and the people that ran it. Jan had had to put up with Nicky, and then Darienne. It was only natural that now that she was finally working for someone competent of course she was going to want with every fibre of her being for that person to do well. Turning to face Vanessa, Brooke made a doubtful face.
“No, girl. Jan’s just loyal. She wants to see Jackie do well. That’s all I think it is anyway.”
Brooke watched as Vanessa knit her brows together, frowning momentarily then casting her gaze into her lap.
“You know-” she began, then cut herself off as she decided against saying whatever she had to say. Then, changing her mind, she began again. “I swear you’re so blind half the time, Brooke Lynn. I think you have your guard up so high you can’t even see when someone has feelings for someone else. It’s kinda…I don’t know. Anyway. It don’t matter.”
Brooke watched, astounded as Vanessa swung her legs off her lap and stood up. Her face was bright red, as if she was embarrassed in some way. Brooke felt she had to reply, but she had no idea what to say or how to respond. She simply blinked at Vanessa, as if her last ditch attempt at communication was morse code.
“I’ll, uh. I’ll see you tomorrow then?” Vanessa continued, smoothing down her dress and smiling as if she hadn’t said a thing. Going along with the façade, Brooke nodded slowly. “Bye, Brooke.”
As Vanessa’s footsteps retreated down the office and into the lift, Brooke just stared straight ahead and tried to make sense of what Vanessa had said, or what it even meant, or what the implications were. It had felt like she was mad at her in some way, although Brooke couldn’t figure out what she’d done. What had she meant by it all? It made Brooke’s head hurt.
She was still there when the cleaners arrived half an hour later, and she still hadn’t managed to unscramble her brain. Giving up, Brooke grabbed her coat and bag and made her way to the lifts, stuck with the feeling that somehow she’d left something behind.
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squaenix-simping · 5 years
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hello again! :D may i get headcanons for platonic fem!reader x vanitas? like, after kh3 and he's become his own person, reader is patient and kind towards him, yet matches his sarcasm as well as finding his rude demeanor kind of amusing, so she makes an effort to become his friend. bonus points if she ends up actually helping him work through a lot of his issues! please and thanks! :3
Hellooooo, no problem!!٩(ˊᗜˋ*)و
- You first run into him in Traverse Town. (Since he’s his own person now and he has nowhere else to go)
- You have been hearing rumours about a mysterious masked figure who constantly shows up around town. Driven by curiosity, you try to seek him out.
- He notices and is rather annoyed by the fact that some random stranger is trying to seek him out for whatever reason??? He doesn’t care and he wants to have nothing to do with you so he just tries to stay away whenever you’re in town.
- After a while, he starts to wonder why you are so persistent??????
- One day he steps out of his corridor of darkness right in front of you (he likes dramatic entrance), acting all high and mighty and asks you what business do you have with him. (It scares the shit out of you when a person comes out from a cloud of darkness
- Ever since your first encounter, he doesn’t really try to avoid you anymore and decides to keep you around to help him kill time.
- He’d purposely say some really awful things to you and basically just be a major jerk to test out if you’re gonna give up on him. You never did.
- Instead, you’d retort his mean remarks with some clever comebacks and he’s both amused and impressed. “You’re such an idiot.” “Oh? I see you’re rubbing off on me then:)”
- Despite the fact that he’s now his own person, he’s still not all sunshine and rainbows. Sometimes he gets really agitated and hostile when he’s all negative and moody. If he’s not pushing you away you can choose to stay by his side quietly. He might not say it but he appreciates you just being there.
- He’s one of those people who bond with others through fighting???? The more of a challenge you are, the better.
- Is more open to the concept of ‘having fun’ when he’s with you. He never really had the chance to do anything for fun before but after meeting you, he’s somewhat affected by your happy and bubbly personality?? He is willing to try out doing stupid shit with you as long as it’s fun. He has also learn to genuinely laugh instead of just laughing mockingly like he always did.
- If you guys ever go to a concert together and you’re too short to see? He’d let you ride him on his shoulders. Yes he will. (“Are you really sure you’re OK with this?” “Just shut up and get up.”
- His unversed like you. (“Stop messing with my unversed!!!” “But they like me!!… Hey if they are part of you then what does that say about you-” “One more word and I will break your neck.”
- You bug him a lot about his helmet but he never takes it off. (“Don’t you feel stuffy in there??” “Mind you own business.”)
- Will hug you when you’re upset. (But only like, when you’re R EA L L Y upset.) And then he will tell you what a pain in the ass you are. 
p.s. sorry im kinda running out of idea after the other two headcanons posts i made X’D and i actually have a clear picture on the moment he finally reveals his face but i think im gonna write it as a short fic????? and it’s kinda romantic instead of platonic????? i will post it when ive finished writing it! 
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korra4321 · 5 years
Text
Gifts (Alternative ending) (unedited)
It's had been exactly a year since she had him thrown in Azcaban , the prison that was build escpacially to keep wizards and witches like him under a lock and key, but in his case it was totally different , they made for him a very special cell with maximum security,it had a glass like texture instead of the usual stony one or the metal bar like , he has the furniture to be white or gray just like his room on her house , meal times was exactly like when they had it together, he even request the same scented candles that she had, the same painting on the walls , every single tiny trivia detail was the same as the one of the house .
It funny how she captured him , you see during his time as Lord Voldemort , another masked figured appeared it was a female one , it started so small at first she stunned few of his deatheaters that was guarding a shop leaving messages that a rebellion had began signed up as {Lady hope } , later she took down more and more until she became the face of the rebellion , as if she was Harry replacement , and in no time she was facing off the dark lord .
He shouted more cursed at her , wanting to just unmask her and killing her , he was curious to see the face of the woman defying him , that had the courage of the dead house Gryffindor, the brains of Ravenclaw, she was judging him and returning his cursed with lighter ones , aiming to just unmask and capture him, so when fate has it twisted way in fullfiiling thiere first part of the wish , both of them were left stunned with shock of who the other was.
Tom reached out his hand not believing his eyes, Korra had tears in her eyes , and he tough she was scared of him , he reached to wipe it out whill he opened his mouth to give a lecture , only for her to recover from the shock and whisper "Stupefy" knocking him unconscious.
He signed , returning to read the book on his hand ,just for him to hear the footsteps of two persons and a hiss that belonged to Nagini " I can feel my master " he smiled at the sense of her aura ,the door of his cell dorm opened reveling her , his soulmate.
Korra didn't change a lot just that her hair that she cut down to fit her rebellion mask , has gotten back to it original length, her eyes got that rest she deserve , her skin more healthy then when she was paranoid that Voldemort will show up at her door making her another victim for his limitless body count.
When she saw him for the very first time in a year she gasped, his hair has gotten longer not the length of a female , the length that was blocking his eyesight if he let his hair uncombed , he have gotten more thin if that was possible, not the thin the 'I can see your bones ' thin , the thin that those who strive to be more then model like , the Slytherin heir will not let himself starve , his skin got more pale due to the lack of sun light exposion , his eyes were still that lovely green .
They where staring at her, eyes longing at every single detail of her face once he was don't taking the examination look he smiled naturally , "hello love, I am glad that you put the long distance relationship state to end, I passed the taste didn't I?, Of course you were testing my ability for it " he didn't pose at the greeting part at all.
"Hello Tom ,I think that I stated before we are not lovers" Korra firmly said as she sighed heavily , she didn't fool herself in thinking that he will be acceptable toward that she didn't return his (obsessive) romantic feeling toward her , her feeling toward him were pure platonic one , nothing less nothing more .
He chortled lightly , "my bad , silly me how could I forget ,Korra , we are not lovers "
She smiled and realised a breath of comfort
"We are soulmates" he continued, saying that as if it's was a solid fact that no two can argue over it .
Korra took fee steps until she was close to him but not so close to see what was his book about , "Tell me Tom, did you really have to do that ?, You could use the easy approach"
Voldemort teeth dangerously closed on them self as he breathed " I doubt that those delusional freaks will kindly kill themselves if I asked for it , the only way to clean there sins is with their blood "
Korra who had regretted opening the wound inturraped him "TOM ,... What I meant was them not respecting muggle born and muggles themselves , I didn't ask for my bestie to go down full mass murder on everyone who was not pure"
He appeared to be taken back " Love ? I was not planning on killing you or myself  , I know that you are my soulmate , you see fate keep in adding more evidence to it nearly every day "
She tough that she will get used to his mood swings and his unhealthy obsession with the idea that they were soulmates, but clearly he could covert a conversation from 'how was your cup of coffee' to 'you see ?, The waitress brought for us smilliar mug colors ,is that evedence of we are soulmate?' in matter of minutes .
She rolled her eyes "surprise me Tom z what are they"
He was euphoriant to be asked that by her , "we are half bloods , you love winter and I was born in it , you don't mind snakes and exotic animals , I speak parseltounge"
'and I can speak sarcasm fluently' Korra though
"Your favorite color is black that is the same as mine, you hate the toxic people like I do , your Lady hope persona match my Lord Voldemort one , hope can be wordplay to hobie which means my love in Arabic...."
He bubbled that Korra zoned out of his chatting only to be zoned back in by...
" And your hair match mine now , you see you returned it to it original length , when mine is long for , we match even when I can't see you "
Korra lover that she didn't eat anything that day , just in case his lecture that she was so positive will leave her wanting to throw up , "you see love , you even feel sick from staying away from me "
Korra serach for a topic to talk about that can shift his attention on her "Nagini misses you"
His eyes widened " you can speak parseltounge?"
"No but I can understand body language"
"Hello master " Nagini hissed
"Hello Nagini , have she been waiting for my outbreak today ?"
"She doesn't know "
Korra still searched for a new thing to distract him before she ask him what the question she come for " Tom , what book are you reading?"
He returned his attention to her " oh , I am not reading more like writing "
He showed her the book, Korra felt more disguste by what he wrote it was just one word all ever the pages as she flipped them .
Her name
Tom having the habit of looking at her and drinking in every detail of her , when took his book to see , be took the opportunity to look at her hand , he eager from the inside , she had the promise ring on her finger , that was meant to have their engagement ring,
"Nagini ....kill whoever give her the piece of metal"
"Yes master "
Korra , reached the last page , she didn't know what negative emotion left for her to feel from it.
The page had a list of their weeding plan , honeymoon, no child name since he know she doesn't want any, the places that he will love to take her to, everything that he planed on doing for them, and all the (creepy ) romantic ways he planned on purposing to her then obliviate her , move to a new location for a different purpose way until he checked out all the ways , the last eat was bone chilling , he planned on purpose to her on surrounded by the corpses of their enemies , all whill they were on the body of the dying minister of magic .
Korra decided to leave it was the time to ask , she give him back his book , or diary to be more specific , when that time for their hand to hold to same object he took his sweet time , crassing her hand , "I love that your skin still smoth, I know mate you kept it just for me , the same way your body is left not touch by anyone but m...."
She took fee steps back , not shocked from his word , but when she saw the wall behind him .
It was filled with her name .
The tears fall down her checks , Tom got angry " come here love , let me wipe them by myself, I don't want anyone but me to do that, not even yourself " he extended his hands for as far as he can from the cell , eyes red like the blood of his fallen enemies .
"Tom , before I leave I want to ask you, why do I feel like something is always missing"
His mood swings strikes again " oh dear soulmate , we are soulmate so naturally you will that when we are not around each other , ... But I know that you mean physical, it because I made a hoxrac for you ...,a mate is equal after all "
"Goodbye Tom"
She began walking , only to hear him reply
"See you later love "
A chill run down her spine but she never looked back.
She was at home now , looking at her promise ring that she bought to herself from the jewelry store, she bought it as a promise to never ever visit him , but since she broke the promise she no longer felt obligated to wear it ,so she gently removed it and put aside on the coffee table.
She decided she need to take a nap , that last thing she saw was Nagini moving outside, before the sandman come for her.
When she woke up there was blood on her , but that was not what frightened her the most,
No it was the note on the same coffee table that she putted the ring on it ,
{Hello love , I am here , but let's play hide and seek ,I am hiding and you seek me
With best regards
Your soulmate
P.s you can't escape all the doors and windows are locked , the house have silence spell on it , oh and there is nothing you can use as weapon too, just your pretty hands  }
Korra never felt the need to scream in terror before like she felt it right there.
Her hands were shaking from rage , that he Tom from his hiding place could see , and being delusional he tough that was a sign of excitement.
He smirked , oh it was gonna be so much fun.
Korra stood up and give her back to the wall gluing on it to never give him the chance to jump on her like his twisted fantasies he have.
She didn't know what to do if she found him , didn't want to know what he will do to her if she did.now she was at the stairs she wished of she could looked two places at the same time , one up and one down .just in case he was to ambush on her .
With each step she took her heart beats louder , untill she reached the top and and had smelled the smell of salt and rust she opened the guest room to find the corpse of the jewelry ship keeper , and to make it worse Nagini was eating it.
Korra didn't fight the tears , she just let them fall , the snake was too busy to notice her , she closed the door and her eyesight was blurry ,she wiped them , just in time to her it " you know love, that keeper had it coming " the voice come inside her head , he was using legllemancy on her , when she tried to use ocullemency to keep him out she couldn't use magic and she was not surprised by that , of course he give her a potion that made her temperory as as she hoped to not use magic.
" Oh I just can't wait for you "
She ignored him , continuing her task she made the wall her support friend , his room was empty , she made sure to search the entire house before coming upstairs, so that leave one room not touched ,hers .
When she opened the door she found her room having a romantic one , straight out of romantic movies , with the sound of running water , "welcome love " his voice didn't come from her head , not it was from right behind her , Korra didn't have the time to turn around,
His arms sneaked around her middle holding her hands captive and his chain rested on her shoulder , his hot breath on her ears tickled her when he whispered " ohh how much I missed your"
"Fuck you...Tom Marvalo Riddle"
He laughed
"If that what you...."
"I didn't mean it that way you...."
"Love , you are dirty by his filthy blood , let's get you cleaned up "
His stupid mood swings.
He led her awkwardly to the bathroom that has the bathtub filled with hot water , rose pitals and the scent of coffee candle , her changing clothes were folded nicely waiting for her , she didn't dare to look at them , she didn't want to know what he chose for her , stupid choices she give him to make , now it come biting down on her , biting like the mess up fact the pet snake was eating dinner, the fact she was led to the bath by her (soulmate) bestie , that his hair was still long.
"Before we bath ...."
" Tom please I don't want to take a bath with you " he shock his head , "love , I understand that you are body shy , but that not a problem I will leave and let you take it by yourself , then once you don't I will bath in the same water you bathed in , that a soulmate right "
His eyes pupils were dialed as he continued not stopping
" Also my hair is long , so we you can cut it and wash it for me , just like you did when I was still homeschooled once, also the scissors are magically enchanted so don't even think about it ".
He wiped away the tears that felt down ,
"I told you only I can wipe them "
There was no escaping from him she knew it , she didn't have to look outside to see the dead bodies of all the enemies on the street , to see the Halloween night take a twisted turn.
To know that he let deatheaters customes be the Trojan horse to began and end successful his plan on taking over the magical world.
To see the two masks on her bed , Lord Voldemort mask and Lady Hope.
He sealed her fate with a kiss on her eyes .
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Rememberance Ch.10
A/N: P.S. I Know nothing about traveling by airplane so there may be some inconsistencies. I apologize in advance for that.
“When is Oliver meeting us?” Sara sat atop Felicity’s dresser, watching as Felicity packed. Her own bag sat waiting beside Felicity’s front door. 
“He said he would meet us at the airport.” Felicity folded up her clothes and placed them neatly in her suitcase. “Did you tell your family you were leaving town for a few days?” “I told my dad I was visiting a friend.” Sara gave a shrug of her shoulder, grabbing up a comb on Felicity’s dresser and twirling it in her hands. “Laurel thinks I’m off to be irresponsible where she won’t be there to judge me.” Sara rolled her eyes, it was tiring how little her own sister thought of her. Felicity thought it would’ve been easier on Sara if she was honest with Laurel about where she was going but she also didn’t think Laurel would have handled it as well as Sara had. Quite frankly, Sara handled it better than she did but maybe that was because it wasn’t happening to Sara directly.   “You know, you don’t have to go, right?” Felicity asked, not wanting Sara to think that she had to come with her. “I course, I don’t have to,” Sara responded strongly, jumping down from the dresser and started helping Felicity pack. “But I want to. I’m not letting you face this alone.” “Oliver’s going, I won’t be alone.” Felicity reminded, folding an article of clothing and placing it in with her clothes in the suitcase. Sara waved her hand dismissively. “He doesn’t count.” Felicity snorted. “Other than being cursed like me, you mean.” Sara nodded, conceding that Felicity had a point there. “Well, there is that.” Sara paused, thoughtfully as she grabbed a little black dress from Felicity’s closet and held it up to her. 
Felicity shook her head no, Sara frowned, glancing at the dress and ignored Felicity and put the dress in her suitcase anyway. “How many days did you take off work?” “A week.” Felicity thought about taking the dress back out but decided not to. “It’s a good thing I’m so good at my job or else I doubt they give me three days let alone a week. How many were you able to take off?” “I got Lisa covering for my shifts. When I get back I return the favor.” Sara replied, sifting through Felicity’s clothes, she grabbed up a pair red laced panties. “You should pack these just in case.” Felicity frowned. “In case what?” “In case the pull between you and Oliver becomes too much and you end up jumping each other's bones.” Felicity glared. “I’m not going to jump his bones.” she snatched the red laced panties from Sara’s hands and put them back in her dresser before walking to her bathroom to grab her toiletries bag. Sara waited till she was gone and then grabbed the red lace from her dresser and quickly slipped it into Felicity’s suitcase, placing it at the very bottom and quickly placed a top over it to cover it up, she stepped back just as Felicity returned. “Okay, I think that’s everything,” Felicity said when she finished packing her bags. “Good.” said Sara, “I still think you should have packed the red lace.” she couldn’t suppress her grin. Felicity rolled her eyes as they headed out the door with their bags. Felicity was locking up her front door when her phone sounded in her pocket, she fished it out and saw Oliver’s name flashing across her screen. “Hello?” she answered, putting the phone to her ear. “So what is your take on taking my family jet to Vegas?” “Like it’s not going to happen,” Felicity said firmly. There was no way she was taking his family jet anywhere. “I rather not draw attention to us. So that’s a no.” “Oh, C'mon, Felicity. Live a little.” Felicity could hear the charming grin in his voice. “Oliver this trip needs to be discreet as possible. I rather not be plaster all over the gossip headlines as your next flavor of the week.” She was not going to end up on the cover of a trashy gossip rag.   “How the hell am I supposed to be discreet? Everyone knows who I am.” ”Blend in. Go incognito. Try not to be so obvious.” Felicity didn’t care how he managed as long as he did.   “Great, I’ll get right on that.” Oliver’s voice dripped with sarcasm. “I’m serious, Oliver.” Felicity wished he was in front of her so she could glare at him to get her point across. “I can’t have my face plastered all over the papers.” She also couldn’t have this affecting her job at QC. “Okay, I’ll try not to get noticed,” Oliver responded, and she could swear she heard him rolling his eyes.   “Thank you. Sara and I will meet you at the airport.” She quickly hung up before he could respond. “You know if you and Oliver end up together you’re going to end up in the papers together anyway,” Sara commented. “We are not going to end up together,” Felicity replied as they reached the cab waiting outside. They tossed the bags into the back seat and got in.   “Soul mates are destined to be together,” Sara said, taking amusement in the way Felicity’s eyes twitched in annoyance, ignoring how the cab driver was sending them odd works for their current topic of conversation. “One, soul mates doesn’t automatically mean you live out a happy life, growing old together. Secondly, I see what you’re doing. You’re purposely messing with me for your own amusement.” “A bit.” Sara grinned. “It’s fun besides like you said I’m just messing with you.” Felicity clicked her tongue. “You suck.” “No. I’m awesome,” she tossed Felicity a smirk. “And you know it.” “Yeah, you kind of are,” Felicity admitted pulling out onto the road. She didn’t know many people who would just take off with their friend to help out with a problem when they didn’t have to. Sara was just being a good friend and Felicity was grateful for it.
Oliver was leaning against his town car when the cab pulled up to the airport. He was dressed in jeans and a gray hoodie, he wore a pair of sunglasses and a baseball cap. Beside him was a man who cut an intimidating with his height and physical build. The sheer size of him had Felicity doing a double take, his arms were the size of tree trunks. “Who the frack is that with Oliver?” She asked, unclipping her seat belt. “Oh, that’s his bodyguard. His whole family has bodyguards.” Sara climbed out of the back seat and Felicity followed. “Digg! You tagging along on this trip?” Sara greeted as they retrieved their bags.   “It was that or my mother would send an entire team of security guards after me.” Said Oliver, pushing off the town car.   Felicity froze, her eyes widening. “You told your mother we were going to Vegas?” Oliver took advantage of her distraction and took her bags. “I told her I was leaving town for a few days to blow off steam.” Felicity nodded, relieved. Then frowned, reaching for her bag. “I got it,” Oliver told her with one of his charming grins. Felicity sighed, deciding to let it go. Instead, she turned to Oliver’s large, no non-sense looking bodyguard. “Hi, I’m Felicity Smoak.” Felicity extended her hand. “John Diggle,” he replied shaking her hand firmly. “Well, it’s nice to meet you, Mr. Diggle.” Felicity let her hand drop back to her side.   “Just Digg will do, Ms. Smoak,” Digg said, fighting back a smile. He cast a look at Oliver, raising his brow. Oliver only shrugged in response. He knew Felicity wasn’t like his usual girls. She wasn’t brunette, she wasn’t leggy, she wasn’t throwing herself at him. And she had this way about her that drew you in and made you like her instantly. “Then just call me Felicity.” Felicity offered him a friendly smile.   Diggle nodded, returning her smile with a faint one of his own   “So how much has Oliver told you exactly about this trip?” Felicity wondered, watching him curiously. “Nothing. He said he was going to Vegas with two friends,” he responded, side-eyeing Oliver. “I thought he might be talking about Tommy and one of his other friends.” Oliver rolled his eyes at both Diggle side eyeing him and his assumption that he was going to Vegas for a weekend of debauchery. Admittedly it wasn’t a far-off assumption but still, that wasn’t the case this time around.   “So you didn’t know he would be heading to Vegas with two female friends,” Felicity concluded with a shake of her head. “But I promise nothing is going to happen that will end up in the papers.” Digg gave her a challenging look. “He’s going to Vegas with two beautiful blonde women. I don’t like to know the details of my clients ‘love’ life and I’d like to keep it that way.” he cast a quick look at Oliver one that said he hoped he knew what he was doing. “I only need to know what is necessary for me to do my job.” Felicity coughed, air getting stuck in her throat, Sara reached out patting her on the back with a laugh at her reaction. Felicity quickly recovered. “Wait, you think, the three of us-” she waved a hand, between herself, Sara and Oliver. “are together, together?” John expression was stoic, not denying it or confirming it. Felicity’s face flushed her cheeks heating. “That is so not happening, I mean, I know Sara’s bi but from what I know of Oliver and her they are not like that.” She was sure Sara would have said something if they were. “And Oliver and I are definitely not together.”   Oliver stepped closer to Felicity with a charming grin firmly in place, his eyes sliding over her slowly. “We can change that.” Felicity gaze snapped to him. “Shut up,” she told him in vague annoyance. She turned her attention back to Digg. “This is a platonic trip. I swear.” her eyes were serious, her chin raised. “No one is going to Vegas for a wild night or getting hitch.” “Well, I wouldn’t say no to a wild night as long as it's with you.” Oliver flashed her another one of his flirty smiles and Sara snorted.   Felicity turned her body toward him, glaring. “Seriously, Oliver, do I need to cut out your tongue to keep you from making suggestive comments?” Oliver's eyes sparkled in amusement. “If you ripped out my tongue, how am I supposed to show you just how good I am with it,” he replied cheekily and Sara laughed.   “I will kill you.” Felicity threatened, her eyes flashing with annoyance.   Diggle expression had changed from stoic to one full of amusement. “I think you and I are going to get along just fine, Felicity. I’ve been waiting for a girl to knock him down a peg or two.” “Hmm.” Felicity hummed, looking like she was considering her words carefully, then her lips turned up into a bright smile. “I think we’re going to get along just fine, Digg.” Oliver leaned half toward Sara, whispering. “Should I be worried?” He watched John and Felicity and half thought they were planning to conspire against him. “Hmm.” Sara pretended to think about it before smirking mischievously. “Possibly.” Oliver frowned. He wasn’t sure he like that idea. But when Felicity laughed at something Diggle said her face lighting up, he quickly decided he didn’t care if they plotted against him, not when Felicity's beautiful laughed sounded, entrancing him with how carefree she sounded and looked right then.
The four booked their tickets for Vegas catching the next flight out which was in just an hour, Oliver kept his head down and did his best to go unnoticed. When they boarded the plane Felicity claimed the seat by the window, Sara quickly taking the aisle seat next to her. Oliver glared at Sara before taking the seat just behind them, Diggle having already taken the seat by the window.
“When are we visiting your mom?” Felicity looked up from the book she was reading at Sara’s question. They were only twenty minutes into the flight.   Felicity frowned, turning her body toward Sara in her seat. “We aren’t.” Oliver leaned forward in his seat at the mention of Felicity’s mother. Hoping to learn more about Felicity.   Sara's lips pulled down into a disappointed frown. “What do you mean we aren’t? You can’t not visit your mother.”   “I didn’t say I wasn’t. I said we weren’t.” Felicity clarified. She was going to visit her mother but she rather no one else was there with her when she did. She didn’t need her two worlds colliding. Her mother was a whirlwind all on her own.   “But I want to meet Donna,” Sara protested. “C’mon, Felicity.” “Absolutely not,” Felicity said firmly. There was no way Sara was meeting her mother. It wasn’t that she was embarrassed. It was more she didn’t want the two of them meeting and bonding and ganging up on her about her lack of social life beyond the nights she would meet up with Sara and Laurel. Oliver stretched until he was leaning over the back of the seat, looking at Felicity. “Your mom’s name is Donna?” he asked, not bothering to hide the fact that he had been listening.   Felicity leaned to the side, not surprised that he was listening but surprised that he sounded even the little bit interested in knowing more about her mother. “Yes,” she answered, finally. “Ugh, I need to go to the bathroom,” Sara said, quickly excusing herself. “I’ll be right back.” She got up from her seat, disappearing down the aisle. Oliver wasted zero time in claiming Sara’s seat the second she was gone, wanting to get closer to Felicity. This wouldn’t be a problem if they would have just taken his family jet Felicity’s eyes narrowed on him as he settled in the seat next to her. “What are you doing?” “I think that’s obvious,” he said, turning his body toward her. “What’s your mother like?” “She’s my mother,” Felicity said after a moment. She didn’t know why he was so curious about her mother. It’s not like they ever talked about her family before.   “Felicity.” Oliver was expecting a little more. Was there something wrong with him taking more of an interest in the woman who raised her. “We don’t have a lot in common but she’s a great mom.” Felicity cursed his blue eyes that were pleading with her to give him something. Why did they have to be so damn blue? “She always worked hard to make sure I had all the best opportunities she could give me.” “She sounds like a great mom. Are you close?” He wondered. He was close with his mother when he was younger but as he grew up, he spent less and less time with her. The pressures and expectations to live up to the Queen legacy didn’t help to bridge the gap that had grown between them.   Felicity pursed her lips, thinking of the relationship she shared with her mother. They were close in a way but then they weren’t. “That’s a complicated question.” “Not really.” Oliver shook his head. “It’s a yes or no question.” Felicity sighed. There were times where she and her mother had clashed over their differences but at the end of the day, she knew her mother would do anything for her. “We have our moments where we're not but for the most part yes.” Oliver nodded. “Do you have any siblings?” Oliver wondered tilting his head at her.   “Only child,” Felicity answered. She had wanted a little sister when she was younger but as she got older she realized it wasn’t in the cards for her and let it go.   Oliver nodded. “What about your dad? Are you close to him?” Felicity jaw tightened at the thought of her father. “He’s not in the picture,” she answered shortly.   “I’m sorry. That must suck.” Oliver said sincerely, he couldn’t imagine what that was like. He had always had his dad. Sure he had been busy with work more often than not when he was younger and even now but at least he was a part of his life.   Felicity nodded but said nothing. She appreciated his sincerity but she didn’t want to talk about her dad. She pursed her lips, looking away from him and out the window. “Any cousins, aunts or uncles?” asked Oliver wondering if she had family outside of her mother. Felicity turned her gaze back to him with a look of suspicion. “Is there a reason you’re asking me so many questions?” Oliver saw the tense set of her shoulders, he wanted to reach out, rub the tension out for her but doubted it would be well received. “I’m just trying to get to know you better.” Felicity felt the tension ease out of her at his words, her suspicious look smoothing out to one of surprise. He sounded so genuine but more than that she could feel his want to get to know her. He meant what he was saying. Oliver watched the emotion flicker across her face but even if he hadn’t seen it, he felt it.   “I have one cousin by marriage. From my mom’s side.” Felicity said after a moment. “He’s a few years younger than me. He’s 14, his name’s Roy. He’s more like a little brother than a cousin though. I call him Scarecrow sometimes.”   “Speedy, 13,” Oliver said and Felicity’s brow furrowed. “That’s my sister, Thea.” he elaborated. “Do you see your cousin often?” “Sometimes more so since I moved to Starling.” He came to stay with her whenever his mother was in one of her drug hazes. It helped that they lived in Starling. Roy’s father much like her own was not in the picture. However, her aunt was an addict that sometimes forgot she had a son whenever she was in one of her drug hazes. Her aunt was the complete opposite of her mother in all the worst ways. Oliver thought it sounded like there was more to the story when it came to her cousin, he was about to ask but couldn’t get a word out before he was interrupted. “Ollie, you're in my seat.” Sara hovered next to him, shooting him a look of annoyance. “Up.”   “You can have my seat,” Oliver told her not wanting to give up the spot next to Felicity. He felt like he was starting to really learn new things about her like he was starting to get to know her a little bit better like he wanted.   “Yeah, no, you’re not hogging Felicity for yourself.” Sara shook her head and motioned with her hand impatiently for him to get moving. “Move it, Queen.” Oliver reluctantly got up, grumbling. “If anyone hogs her it’s you, Lance.” Sara’s response was to simply stick her tongue out at him and reclaim her seat. Felicity stifled a laugh, pressing the back of her hand to her mouth. Oliver returned to his seat with a frown which only deepened when he caught sight of  Diggle’s look of amusement. “You find this funny?” “Completely.” Diggle grinned. “Two small blondes, Oliver’s Queen’s undoing.”   “You're not funny,” Oliver told him flatly. Admitting to himself that Diggle may not be wrong in regards to at least one of the blondes. He had a feeling Felicity really would be his undoing but he couldn’t bring himself to care. It would be worth it.   “I think I’m funny,” said Diggle unbothered by the annoyed glare Oliver was sending his way.   “Well, your not,” Oliver grumbled. Damn, he hoped Diggle and Sara weren’t making it their mission to see who could annoy him the most during this trip. Diggle was unperturbed in his amusement, chuckling to himself.  
The group rented out a town car and Diggle drove them to a five-star hotel, Felicity immediately rejected the idea but Sara had given her the blue eyes puppy dog look, convincing her to go along with it, much to Oliver’s joy. He already hated that they didn’t take his family’s jet. Felicity didn’t have to guess why Detective Lance always let Sara off the hook, especially if she was pulling out her sad blue eyes and pouting. Felicity had caved faster than she was proud to admit. Oliver was more than happy to set them up in a five-star hotel penthouse suite. Diggle and Oliver had their own rooms however Sara and Felicity had claimed the master suite for themselves with the ensuite bathroom, willing to share.   Felicity admittedly had been overwhelmed by all the extravagance before she shook it off. She just wasn't used to places like this. She was used to her less than stellar lifestyle in comparison to 5-star hotels. Oliver looked at Felicity, his eyes suggestive. "You know if you don’t want to share with Sara, you could always sleep in my bed?” Sara snorted in a very unladylike manner. “I thought you were smoother than that, Ollie?”   “It’s not like it’s the first time Sara and I’ve slept together.” Felicity shrugged, her face flushing when she realized how that sounded.   Oliver's eyes widened, his mouth opening and closing in surprise. And honest to God, he couldn’t help but picture it. Felicity and Sara in bed together and he was not ashamed to admit that when he did his thoughts were of the mature variety. Sara laughed knowingly as Oliver stared off at nothing. “You broke his brain.” She told Felicity before turning to Oliver. “Mind out of the gutter, Ollie. I sleep over at Felicity’s place a lot.” Oliver turned his gaze slowly to her, his eyes glazed over. “In Felicity’s bed?” Felicity blushed her cheeks heating. “Can we move on past the sleeping arrangements? We have more important matters to consider.” “Okay, so our next step is going to see that gypsy woman, right?” Sara asked looking at Felicity. “How sure are you that she knows what she’s talking about?” Oliver questioned, turning expectant eyes to Felicity.   “Everything Talina said would happen has and she predicted this when I was seventeen.” Felicity thought that was kind of hard to argue with. Her predictions were coming true that at least earned her some credit.     “Okay,” Oliver nodded. “you have a point.” Still, all this was weird. Really weird and let’s not forget crazy. “What the hell are you three talking about?” Diggle asked baffled staring at each of them like they were on something. Felicity turned to Oliver, frowning. “You haven’t told him anything?” “I haven’t told anyone about what’s going on,” Oliver admitted. “The only person I talk to about it was Sara since she already knew what was going on. Hell, she knew before I did.” Which okay was helpful since Sara got him to go see that Felicity wasn't just messing with him.  But this wasn’t something he would go around telling anyone. Mainly because they would probably want to check him in a psych ward and evaluate him for being crazy. “Well, when your friend has words carved into her skin, you tend to demand answers,” Sara responded defensively. How could she not want answers when she saw Felicity’s brand.   “Felicity has what now?” Diggle frowned, becoming even more confused. “Oliver has them too,” Felicity said defensively, “Really?” Diggle’s sharp eyes turned to his friend. “Okay, Oliver, why don’t you fill Digg in on what’s going on. And I’ll order us some food?” Felicity suggested, though her tone basically implied he had no choice in the matter. “I’m starving and feeling a bit jet-lagged.” “When are we going to see Talina?” Sara wondered. “Tomorrow afternoon is the safest best. It's getting late, her shop will be close about now. I figure we can get settled in for the night.” Felicity answered, plus it gave her one more night to be in denial about how weird her life has become since she met Oliver and the mark appeared.   “Is she discreet?” Oliver wondered, walking around the suite before settling onto the couch. Sara frowned, her eyes narrowing. “You think she’ll reveal what’s going on to the press because you’re you.” “Well, the thought has crossed my mind,” Oliver admitted.   “That’s something we should all consider. If something like this got out the press would have  a field day.” Diggle looked at Oliver. “And what exactly is this?” “So apparently Felicity met this gypsy when she was 17 who told her she and her soulmate were cursed. Turns out I’m her soulmate and get this we share the same soul. We can feel what the other is feeling.” Diggle frown deepened. “What the hell have all you been taking? You should stop whatever it is before you get yourself committed for some kind of mental break.” “We’re not on drugs and we’re not crazy.” Oliver pulled up his shirt bearing his mark. “This appeared the same night I met Felicity.” Diggle’s eyes widened as he took in the mark, the words creepy and possessive to him, his eyes snapped to Felicity. “You have one too?” Felicity nodded and lifted her shirt just enough for Diggle to see her mark. "Not the same words but basically, yeah." He shook his head at the sight. “Man, this is crazy.” Digg sunk into a chair across from Oliver. “So you came to Vegas to get help from this gypsy woman, Talina?” “She knows more about this than we do.” Felicity nodded. “She’s our best shot at figuring this out and putting an end to it.” “Well, let’s hope she doesn’t leak this to the papers cause I have no idea how your PR team would cover this up,” Digg said, his eyes on Oliver.   “No, I don’t think Talina is like that.” Felicity shook her head, moving to sit on the other end of the couch. "She’s a little weird, okay, a lot weird but I think she’s a good person. I truly believe she just wants to help.” From the day Felicity met her she hadn’t asked a single thing from her. Never wanted anything in exchange for her help. She just seemed like she genuinely wanted to help.   Sara sat on the arm of the couch next to Felicity. “In any case, she’s the only who might have an idea to help you.” Felicity understood their doubts. Hell before she met Talina she thought gypsies were basically quacks but then she met Talina and the woman had been so sure. It was hard not to take her seriously. It became impossible when the mark appeared. “Once you meet her, I think your concerns will be gone. Talina, she's not a fraud and she’s not out to scam people.” Felicity truly believed that all Talina wanted to do was help them.
The next morning, the four got breakfast before heading out to meet Talina. They were having breakfast at one of Felicity’s favorite cafe’s with wraparound booths, the service was always friendly and great, at night they always had a local performer playing the piano.   “Do you remember where her shop is?” Sara asked, digging into her breakfast of chocolate chip pancakes. Felicity nodded. “Yeah, her shop is just down the street from the Casino my mother works at.” She cut off a bite of her blueberry waffle covered in just the right amount of butter and syrup.   “Your mother works at a casino?” Oliver asked curiously looking up from his plate of sausage, eggs, and bacon. “What does she do?” “She’s a cocktail waitress,” Felicity answered, not the least bit ashamed of her mother’s job. She worked long hours to provide for her and she was grateful to her mother for everything.   Sara looked at Felicity with a hopeful smile. “Is there any chance you’ll let us meet her today?” Felicity considered it for a moment, knowing how much Sara wanting to meet her mother, she sighed more to herself than anything. “ I planned on seeing her later. You can meet her then.” Oliver grinned at the possibility of meeting Felicity’s mother and he wasn’t even sure why the idea of meeting her mother pleased him so much. Just that he wanted to know the woman who he had to thank for bringing Felicity into the world. Sara grinned, pleased. “Good.” she was looking forward to meeting the woman she heard so much about. “Fair warning, we are nothing alike,” Felicity warned with a wave of her fork.   Diggle looked at her in amusement, eating his own breakfast that was the same as Oliver’s. “I’m serious.” Felicity insisted. “Most people assume I’m adopted because we’re nothing alike.” And they really weren’t, they were so different at times it made their personality clash but it didn’t mean they loved each other any less. It just meant that they didn’t always see eye to eye. Still, she knew her mother would do anything for her and she would do the same for her.
Felicity found her way to the shop easily, remembering exactly where it was. She entered the shop with Oliver and Sara trailing in behind. The bell jingling above the door as it opened and closed behind them. Digg had opted to stay in the car. All this talk of curses and marks was a little too out there for him. He wanted to be on a need to know bases as far as he was concerned in all this soulmate, curse, mojo. Felicity could sympathize that had been her reaction at first, too until she was forced to faced there was some amount of truth to it all. There was a young girl with Coppertone skin, green eyes, working behind the counter. She looked to be around 19. Felicity approached her.  “Hi, I’m Felicity Smoak and I was hoping to speak with Talina.” The girl’s eyes widened. “I know who you are. Aunt Talina told me about you.” Felicity brow raised in surprise that Talina had spoken of her to someone else. “Just wait one second, I’ll go and get her.” But before the young girl could step away from the counter, there was the sound of rattling beads and an older woman was emerging from a back room. Felicity recognized Talina almost immediately. The woman and her ominous warnings were hard to forget no matter how much time had past. She looked almost the same as when Felicity saw her when she was seventeen, except she had a few more age lines and a few gray hair streaks in her dark hair that contrasted with her Coppertone skin. The resemblance between her and the young girl was obvious. Talina looked directly at Felicity when she emerged from the back room her eyes intently on her. “I’ve been expecting you.” Talina moved around the counter toward Felicity. “Felicity Smoak.” Talina reached out, taking Felicity’s hand in her own however when she did she frowned. She looked at Sara and Oliver momentarily. She paused but then her eyes zeroed in on Oliver, staring through him like she could see into his soul. Knowing her Felicity thought maybe she could. Talina's free hand snapped out and took Oliver’s hand in her own, her eyes narrowing. “Hey, hey, what are you doing?” Oliver asked startled, he pulled on his hand but the old woman’s nails dug into his skin, keeping his hand in her grasp. “Ow!” Talina ignored him as she turned his hand over, with a huff of disapproval she dropped both their hands abruptly, shooting her eyes back to Felicity with a look full of accusation. “You’ve formed a bond.” “What?” Felicity's eyes widened and she shook her head in denial. “No, we haven’t.” “I’m the expert here,” Talina retorted sharply, her eyes flaring with annoyance. “Felicity, your energies have merged. You have formed a bond.” “But how?” Her brow scrunched up, looking completely confounded. “I mainly kept my distance from him.” Sara looked to felicity a grin tugging at her lips. “Did you sleep with him?” “No!” Felicity protested, her voice rising in volume, cheeks heating at the implication. “I would definitely remember that happening,” Oliver commented, I mean, how could he not, he’d been longing after her since the night he first laid eyes on her.   “Have you had any physical contact?” Talina looked between them both. Scrutinizing them with her gaze as if simply looking at them would give her the answer she wanted. Felicity face flushed, feeling completely flustered as she recalled practically making out with Oliver. “Well, I, I mean, we um, we-” “We made out,” Oliver stated bluntly, his lips pulling into a smirk as he remembered the feel of his mouth moving against hers.   Talina face pinched and she clicked her tongue in clear annoyance. “Did you touch each other’s marks?” Felicity winced, she really hoped that wasn’t going to come back and bite her in the ass. It was just a touch. “Um, I did.”   “But I didn’t touch her mark.” Oliver felt the need to say.   Talina made another sound of annoyance, huffing in exasperation. “Are you saying they can form a bond simply by touching each other’s mark?” Sara asked, stepping forward. “I thought they would have to have sex or something for that to happen.” “Real soul connections are through the simplest of touches.” Talina voice held a weight to them that captured their sole focus. “Not everything is through sex. Young people these days.” she shook her head as if she couldn’t possibly understand the younger generation. Talina turned her focus back on Felicity. “The bond isn’t completely formed. Let’s keep it that way.” Felicity nodded, if forming the bond was such a bad thing then she would do everything she could to keep that from happening. Oliver frowned. “What’s so bad about us forming a bond?” “It can affect our chances of breaking your curse,” Talina answered gravely.   “I’m sorry, what?” Felicity asked, eyes wide with surprise and worry. Talina looked at her with a look that was half exasperated, half sympathetic. “I told you not to form a bond. I told you it wouldn’t be good.” “Then how do we un-form the bond?” Felicity asked quickly, wringing her hands together. “You don’t.” Talina shook her head, her eyes unsettled. “Once a bond is formed that’s it. It cannot be undone. Soulmates that are bonded are not trivial. It’s not like when a marriage run its course and you get a divorce. A soul mate bond is for the rest of your life. Literally. It cannot be broken.”   “Then how are they supposed to break the curse?” asked Sara hoping she was following along correctly. “If the bond makes things worse for them what are they supposed to do? They cannot stay cursed.” Felicity raised her chin, stubbornly. “No, there has to be a way to break it.” Talina looked at her appraisingly before finally, she said. “There is one way.” Oliver could feel Felicity's desire to break the curse, to be free of it, he wanted the curse broken but he could feel Felicity's need for it stronger than his own. "What is it?”   Talina looked between them with a grim expression. The next word to leave her lips shocked them all into a stun silence.   “You have to die.”
A/N: Likes and reblogs are encouraged :)
Tagged: @6i66leserna / @angelamccauley15 / @almondblossomme / @ilikethebackofyourneck
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quietasides · 7 years
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Wow, I watched some Laurel and Hardy and...
“....the unbeatable auspices of Laurel and Hardy, known the world over as an image of unbreakable friendship pledged to love through all disaster.”
all quotes from “Nuts and Nice Messes: On Laurel and Hardy,” by Dan Callahan
So I read this article, right, and it spoke some of the possible/likely homoeroticism in the films Laurel and Hardy made together. Okay. I was not fully prepared for what I watched.
The First Mistake:
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“Hardy’s tie-twiddle is expert from first to last, or soup to nuts, and he used it as a punctuation, a polite endearment, or a sign of stymied sexual excitement and embarrassment. His famous look into the camera can mean so many things: incredulity, exasperation, sarcasm, resignation.
“...Laurel and Hardy in bed together [was] a soon to be familiar sight and one that first raises that vexed question: just what kind of relationship do these “boys” have? There aren’t any easy answers to this. In their later films, Laurel and Hardy are often in flight from women, and with reason. Many of their wives are unreasonable gorgons...who take out a shotgun at alarming speed in order to settle a dispute. The available single women in their world are pretty and sexy but almost always mean, mercenary, and ready to laugh at any unfortunate pratfall. The boys are purely avuncular with the few sweet single girls that come their way.”
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The baby is crying, and Laurel will help calm it—
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Handing over the baby does not go smoothly—
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rather...okay
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Well, this is...
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a little suggestive
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Hardy wants in on the action, I guess, because—
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OMG
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OMG
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OMFG
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OMGgggggggg
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OMG OMG
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Could it get any more homoerotic? Could it?
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As it turns out, YES!
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“...they would set up a joke, sometimes for quite some time, execute it, which happened fairly quickly, and then “milk the gag” to the nth degree, so that the set-up and the milking afterwards were always more important than the gag itself.”
Speaking of “milking it,” again the baby cries—
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OMG
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OMFG
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OMGgggggg
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mainlining it
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OMG OMG
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and fade to black...
THE END
“Their characters were eminently suggestible, especially Laurel, whose ‘stupidity’ was childlike most of the time but often wandered into the dicier areas of the adult subconscious. They’re two halves of the same person, which means that their love for each other is ideal, in the strict Platonic senses, and if the boys ever have sex of some kind, it would have to be unconsciously, part of their instinctive dumbness (and not to be spoken about afterward!)...As Ruth Gordon would say, let’s draw the veil...
“...Yet Ollie can’t give Stan up. They’re soulmates, tied together in Beckett-like fashion to the end, the yin and the yang, the fat and the thin; epicurean Hardy loves to order lots of the most succulent-sounding food, but Laurel is ever satisfied with “hard-boiled eggs and some nuts.
p.s. “...[in an early film together] Ollie is a woman-crazed purser and Stan is an ill-tempered cabbie, and both are quite bewilderingly out of character....”
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META: SUMMARY
This isn't part of the canon because it developed through a long time and several threads. The following takes place between Sept. 2014 and Feb. 2017 and solely influences main!verse aka; beginner's luck. ( Hinting to P.S!Sakon because his current mindset has been becoming eerily similar to that one ).
THE OLD BLOG.
1. Sep. 2014 - Jan. 2015. Pretty close with Mitsunari ( the four that were around, he was in heaven ) and in the process to be recognised as his ( pinky ) left hand. Still curious, always trying to empathise with other's problem even if couldn't understand them at a deeper level. Timid with girls, and easily flustered because they were too pretty. Attempted to fight anyone who seemed strong, driven by the desire of improve his fighting skills and... in all honesty, fighting was fun ( still is ). Horrible cooking skills.
He did his best even if wasn’t taken into account for decisions or anything. His main motivation was being acknowledged as a useful member of the Toyotomi and make his lord proud. Sakon used to have a big crush on him too, he stood no chance. His opinion about Ieyasu was way softer as well. He didn’t have many friends and was pushed to drink alcohol by other soldiers, at least did it only on occasions. Hated make others sad.
2. Feb. 2015 - April. 2015. Takes a step forward in try to cheer up sad people indiscriminately. His troubles with drinking and uhh... questionable ideas got somewhat worse; started to want feel how was being in a relationship. First cases of actually feeling depressed but not outright refuse help, in fact asked for some kind of help. He really did. This was the starting point in which Sakon began to drift away and try to find new people to spend time with and get advice. This was his opinion about Kiyouki, and he was scared of commit the same mistakes again.
( Also this is an example of what might happen if Mitsunari dies. ) Sakon wanted to help but couldn’t do much, leading to a feeling of inadequacy. Yet, it wasn’t overwhelming enough to stop him from being most of the time cheerful and weird. If anything, he did turn more childish without realizing. It brought an odd sense of comfort, though. He couldn’t explain well the sensation.
3. May. 2015 - July. 2015. He took more tasks, missions and the like. All while following some people’s advice. In general had a peaceful period, feeling better as could help more for the army’s sake. Except for an uncomfortable Mother’s day having to deal with Hisahide. ( Also here, another glimpse of the mess that is post-sekigahara!Sakon ). And in a way, some ask memes broke him down... and did affect him for a long time. Mitsunari dying. Maria dying. Other people dying----- ending in this. THIS.
Between the good things in his life, he meet SW!Sakon and it was instant admiration, considering him a cool big brother from another dimension. Then he also found Katsuie and started to interact with him because RIVALS !!! And he wished to bring a little joy to his life. He had been on several highs and lows, not wanting people to suffer the same experiences as him; it wasn’t a crush --- just a sincere attempt to help. Likewise, no matter how bad was before he could bounce back to his bright self.
His birthday ( June 9th ) was spent with his other self. Nobody else knew when it was since he kept it as a secret. They ate sweets, it was cute, nice and pure.
The box trouble happened a few days after, stealing Katsuie’s first kiss in a mix of; mind shifting to auto-pilot given his fear of small and enclosed places and messed up sense of intimacy. It was an awful moment. But they got better and spent a lot time together, it felt natural and that’s how Sakon’s got attached to him. With Mitsunari it was always chase him, or chase Gyobu, to take part of their activities. Katsuie seemed fine with him and he was glad of it. Share clashing opinions was satisfying too.
4. Aug. 2015 - Oct. 2015. Why does he have low expectations in romance or being chosen at all? This is the answer. He always would be a second option, a replacement. Why ‘Kiyouki’ began to be part of him again? He doubted about how ‘dead’ he was. Why he sees himself an ‘unworthy? This is the answer. It was a period in which he tried to drown his sorrows with alcohol, hoping the bad feelings would go away. It didn’t happen and they grew bigger and stronger as the time passed. He ignored them because couldn’t go seeking reassurance every time something went wrong. His mood was pretty volatile those months.
He cheered himself up with jokes and socializing. As well slept a lot to calm down and not over think. He had a brief crush on someone else ( honestly, on who he hasn’t had one...? ) notwithstanding, it ended soon. His feelings for Mitsunari turned entirely platonic and he was content with it. His opinion on marriage changed too, he ended very ambivalent after certain interaction. ( And in an unrelated noted; Kiyouki’s nature. ) At this point he met Tatsu and befriended her. Same for Masazumi.
5. Nov. 2015 - May. 2016. He started to close off and fully embraced the idea of pretend being happy. Still tried to give advice in hopes that people wouldn’t end in the same state as him. His cheerfulness and ability to communicate were subdued. Yet his acting skills made it unnoticeable. Lies were more frequent.  Once again tried to push through giving his best smile, as far as it could be, of course. Quite dramatic at times, for the sake of being believable. Then he took even more tasks, missions and improved skills in other fields.
As a lighthearted fact, he did ask if could purchase adulthood and compared it with a plant. He was extremely childish. And got a Mitsunari plush. ........Also made a dumb joke and then was pushed to confess his feelings, dying a little inside. Very lonely. Who is him if isn’t a bouncy sunshine? No idea. Identity crisis already present and causing trouble. Failure of his own expectations. Pretty much disappeared for a while. When not talking with people went to hide in solitary places, to keep his mental health in check.
THIS BLOG
6. June. 2016 - Sept. 2016. His birthday was fine, he got some presents and good wishes. Kept himself busy with romance and idle entertainment. Couldn't see Ieyasu without jump into action full of bitterness and salt, ready to roast him as many times as he wanted. His denial over some repressed feelings became stronger than ever, even when his methods were told right to his face. Then went to find his inner nature-lover and found him, taking old habits he had as a kid ( prior the destruction of his home ). His relief was short-lived because then was asked to teach how to be a good husband, by the same person he confessed his affections not long ago. His reaction was... a mix between sadness, disappointed and rage under a seemingly happy expression. It was messy.
Miserable but never stopping from trying to cheer up others, regardless how dumb and extravagant they were. To avoid negative thoughts he named them 'Kiyouki' as stopped associating them with himself, that way it'd be someone else and not him; it's complicated. It happened often, he having to push these feelings onto a corner of his mind. Or if the situation appears, use them in a creative and non-harmful manner. Trolling and sarcasm.
7. Sep. 2016 - Dec. 2016. Returned to his casino nights and had fun, good fun. He didn't talk about himself and time ran fast. Not many were around but he wouldn't complain. Still, his attitude got even more infantile and his emotions were fake half of the time. Sometimes would slip into a state of 'not feeling anything' without realise and sound insensitive. Little by little resigned to his inner hollowness, all while never stopping to make others happy. His sense of self-worth was almost completely gone. He just wanted to keep himself distracted enough to continue with his facade.
That's when his exhaustion began, his sadness and pain couldn't be hidden as before. It became a solid half of his personality, unlike the vague one when he started to doubt if Kiyouki was as dead as he liked to think. Doubts lurked on his mind, on the love and acceptation that people offered him, on himself and his own attitude, on everything. Insecure, lonely and still playing his act of fake happiness, he had a hard time keeping everything together. People would worry like before, they would feel bad... and he didn't want to go through that again. They deserved better and thus, Sakon continued as if nothing was wrong.
8. Jan. 2017 - Now. Then his trouble with Katsuie 'never having feelings for him' and Mitsunari's misunderstanding his 'attempts of befriending him' as flirting hit him harder than expected. Mitsunari is by far he is concerned, his saviour, one who accepted him before being Sakon. And Katsuie was the one he spent most of the time with and could talk about most topics without restraint. To him, it was a rejection from both sides. Certain idea of fake his lord's death to push him into killing Katsuie hit him too.
On his limit, hear that they liked him for his cheerfulness didn't help. He assumed they wouldn't like him anymore if gave in and freed his bottled up emotions, they would abandon him if couldn't keep going. Then Tama ignored his advice, scoldings and all he tried to dissuade her from her crush on Ieyasu. In his opinion, it would cause her many problems; including be accused of treason and he was terrified. Except that none of his words helped. Following his first big breakdown happened and lashed out at Tama. Die was a good option, he knew his mind would shatter if didn't take a break and yet couldn't see another way to stop feeling this way. Mistrusting, frustrated, unhappy and only loved because of his countless lies.
Adding to everything happening, he and Mitsuhide were honest about their identities and Tama wanting to kill herself. For that point onwards, he desperately escaped from himself. Napping, cutting conversations, and being mean at little provocation. Although crumbling, Sakon was too scared to ask for help. Try to being honest with another person aside the man who he knew that wasn't to be trusted was meaningless. As well, most of the questions he asked to Mitsuhide were ones he did to himself and couldn't find a satisfying response. It brought some comfort have someone to talk about those topics since nobody in the Toyotomi had experienced that kind of disconnection with oneself. He did want to be his friend and have fun.
What finally broke him was finding Tama dead. It all stopped, and he floated away in a half-asleep state. Sakon was taken to the Oda but wasn't here or there, he wasn't sure of what was doing anymore. Even when was brought back to the army, by Mitsunari himself no less, he felt nothing. ( If had stayed in the Oda, he could have been moulded into anything or anyone they wanted because nor Sakon or Kiyouki was inside. It was a body and a heavily bruised spirit ).
Every single smile afterwards was fake, there was no sense of enjoyment or happiness. Wake up and work was difficult. Talk with others and open up was scary. Driven by a fear of being replaced and/or abandoned, used his last strength to continue. And yet "you are… a light and a very bright one at that. Your charming nature and positive attitude… it is what is still keeping somewhat some sanity within the Toyotomi Army. It may not seem it at times, but I’m certain a lot could have happened should you not have come around when you did." What Mazasumi told him, pulled him further into despair. He didn't feel happy, he couldn't even fake being happy without it being obvious. Useless tools were meant to be thrown away and he wasn't different of one.
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