#outing myself once again as a basic pop girly do you guys still love me

[maxipowell]

rules: shuffle your on repeat playlist and ask people to vote for which they like best!

tagged by my most beloved @wmnylander thank u 🩷

tagging: @xariarte @danielshoneybadger @bogdanovics @lukevangelista @kdsburneraccount @napapamahal @goingextinct @raheemsradio & @tangerwoll 🤍

[bbdaydreams]

Courage My Love// Semi Eita

Pairing: Semi Eita x Reader

Summary: You like Semi and come up with a plan to confess to him, unfortunately it takes a turn. You meet again a couple years later by chance.

Chapter Two: How Do You Feel?

Series Masterlist•<previous•next>

—————

The moment you were allowed to leave the auditorium you made your way back to your dorm. A couple people would stop to congratulate you on your win, some being complete strangers. They were nice and thoughtful but right now you weren’t in the right mindset to interact with others. You held your trophy close to your chest so it wouldn’t get damaged but also draw minimal attention mumbling a quick “thank you” from time to time.

“Y/n!” Tendou called your name when you were made it to the building that your dorm was located. You turned to face him and waited for him to catch up. When he made it to you his first instinct was to wipe your tears. “C’mon, no more tears,” he said softly before opening the door to let you in first.

When you made it to your dorm Tendou made his way to his spot on the edge of your bed while you set the guitar case down and put the award somewhere on your desk. Walking to your bed you immediately threw your covers up before getting under them and cocooning yourself with them.

Tendou met you about halfway through your first years when you interrupted their practice to drop something off for Semi. He didn’t know his friend had such a pretty friend. When you asked for Semi he immediately started his teasing which left you blushing, a look that Tendou found entertaining.

When you started getting closer with Semi, you also became more aquatinted with his friends as he did with yours. At first, you definitely thought Tendou was quite the oddball but you were quick to accept him as he was, it’s just Tendou things.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” the redhead spoke.

“I don’t get it. I thought we were closer than this. I don’t know what I’m more hurt by, the fact that he didn’t ask me to be his date or the fact that I had no idea he was even seeing someone.”

“I didn’t even know. Hell, even Wakatoshi was surprised when it wasn’t you he was asking!”

“God next week is gonna be so embarrassing,” you said now burying your face into your pillow.

“Hm? Why’s that?”

“We have our stupid dance next week! And we have that dumb dinner we all agreed to go to before we went to the stupid dance! Everyone is gonna have a date but me! Reon is going with his girlfriend, Ushijima has his date, Semi has miss mysterious, you have your date-“

“I don’t have anyone,” Tendou quickly cut you off.

You furrowed your eyebrows as you turned to look at him. “Why don’t you have a date?”

He shrugged his shoulders before responding, “I don’t know. I was gonna go by myself. I don’t mind being the odd man out.”

“I’ll be your date.”

Tendou turned and looked at you as if you were crazy. He leaned forward and squinted his eyes before leaning back. “Are you sick or something? Weren’t you crying over Semi and now you’re moving on that quick? I know I’m great but still that’s a little too quick for me doll face.”

You laughed as he spoke. “I am heart broken, but you still deserve to go to our last dance with a date. I don’t mind, I’ll go with you, what are friends for?” Once you realized what you said you where quick to apologize. “I mean, you don’t have to go with me if you don’t want to. I know you can ask someone else and they’ll say yeah, it was kinda selfish of me to just offer myself like that especially with all this going on.”

“I’ll take you up on your offer.”

-

The next morning you decided to text Izumi about her offer. It was the weekend so classes weren’t a huge focus, especially since the year was about to end.

“Girls! She texted!” Izumi exclaimed, raising her phone in the air with excitement.

“No way,” the girl with the attitude responded.

“That’s a good sign!” the soft spoken girl added. “What did she say?”

“She asked if we could talk more about the band.”

“Invite her over, Izumi!”

“Already did. She should be here soon.”

Walking towards the arts building you kept glancing at your phone every few steps. Why hasn’t he texted you? Does he not care about how hurt you were? Semi kept clouding your mind. You guys text regularly and you assumed he would’ve texted by now asking you if you were okay or even just saying a morning. Maybe you should text him first, you thought but that idea went out the window when you made it your destination. You put your phone away and opened the door to focus on finding the room that Izumi told you they’d be in.

When you found the room you knocked on the door waited for someone to answer. You heard voices on the other side for a bit until the door opened to reveal the bathroom girls.

“Welcome!” Izumi greeted, letting you into the room before closing the door behind you. “Thanks for coming, this is the practice room we managed to snag.”

“Hi,” you greeted her before looking at the other girls and saying hello to them as well.

“We didn’t properly introduce ourselves yesterday, now did we?” the main girl spoke. “I’m Yui.” She put her hand out for you two to shake.

“I’m Haruka,” the timid one spoke.

“It’s nice to meet you all.” You took a second to look around the room. It was a pretty much empty room with some supplies and desks but it was all pushed to one side of the room while the open space they created housed their instruments. “How’d you get this room? Eita usually has to go off campus to practice with his mates.”

“I’m close with the music teacher, so she pulled some strings and managed to do this for us,” Yui answered.

“Is Semi your ex?” Haruka asked innocently which made the girls eyes go wide.

“Haru, you can’t just-“

“It’s okay. And no he’s not my ex, we’re just friends. When you guys found me I was just overwhelmed,” you told them. They looked at each other as if using telepathy to communicate with each other. They must’ve unanimously decided not to press you further with their own curiosity and changed the subject.

“So, what kind of music do you listen to?”

“I listen to a little bit of everything but mainly pop punk I guess. It’s hard to label it. What about you guys?”

“I get that and we’re pretty much the same. Haruka is mostly into metal, but she still vibes with all the other stuff,” Izumi answered.

At this you had to laugh a bit. The most innocent and quiet looking one of the group, enjoyed heavy music. “Haruka, no way,” you told her while looking at her.

She leveled her eyes with yours before giving you a closed eye smile and speaking, “I love the lyrics and head banging. It’s fun.”

“I have to agree. What sound are you guys aiming for with the band?” You asked.

“Honestly anything. I don’t think we really have a sound yet, we kinda just play and mess around until we find something we like or we’ll give a topic and try to match something up with that makes sense. You mind listening for a second?” Yui asked making her way towards the bass.

“I’d love to” you responded before taking a seat on one of the empty desks. Izumi made picked up the electric guitar and Haruka sat on the stool behind the drums which was another surprise for you. Don’t judge a book by its cover, you reminded yourself.

Haruka gave the count down with her drum sticks before leading them into the song. Yui joined in and then Izumi followed after. Watching them was entertaining, Haruka’s hair was going all over the place you had to question how she was able to see. Yui seemed to enjoy swaying side to side while occasionally head banging while Izumi seemed a little stiff but was definitely enjoying themself. They seemed to be in sync with each other it made you worry that if you were to join if you would mess up their flow. When they finished they looked up to you.

“So what do you think?” Yui asked.

“I’d like to join, I just don’t wanna mess you guys up. You guys seem pretty in tune with each other are you sure you want me to join?”

The girls immediately started laughing making you question if you said something wrong.

“You’re funny, y/n,” Haruka giggled.

“We’ve been together for a year now and have been practicing almost daily which is why we’re at the level we are,” Izumi stated.

“Listen, yeah we’re alright but we need that missing piece which is you. And we’re picky. We’ve been looking for six months for a lead so when we saw your performance we knew we had to have you. We want you,” Yui added on.

You slipped off the desk and smiled at them before presenting a notebook you brought along with you. “Then I guess I’m in. This is my lyric book, basically what I have to offer besides my voice.”

Yui took the book and flipped through it while Izumi and Haruka looked over the writing as well. Yui and Izumi looked very concentrated while Haruka’s expression showed amazement.

“You’re good!”

“Dude, you’re definitely in. I can’t wait to perform these live in front of others!”

“Damn girly, you really are full of surprises.”

Blushing at their compliments you accepted your journal back. “Thank you, I’ve been writing since my first year.”

“Can I ask why there were some ripped pages?” Izumi asked.

“Oh, those were some songs I wrote for Eita’s band. I felt like they were more his style so I gave them to him.”

You guys continued chatting until it was around lunch time. They wished you goodbye and reminded you to come back tomorrow to start joining them for practice. You left the practice room with a smile on your face, excited for what the future held in store for your new band.

-

The week went by fast, you basically spent it writing more lyrics since all your school work was already done.

The school dance was tonight and so was the dinner that you were joining. You got out of the shower and threw on some sweats before making your way back to your dorm so that other girls could go take a shower to get ready.

“Hey, Y/n,” Yui greeted when she was stepping out of her dorm with a towel. “You getting ready?”

“Yeah, you’re going to the dance too right?” You told her, taking a step closer to the wall so others could walk by.

“Yep. I assume I’ll see you there. You’re going to that dinner thing with your friends first right?”

You nodded your head up and down. “Mhmm. I’ll probably part ways with them at the dance and try to find you and the others.”

“Sounds good. Remember, if anything happens, you have us to rely on. I know we barely know each other yet but we’re here for you,” she told you honestly. Yui may come off strong, but she really is a reliable human being. “I’m gonna try to find a shower head, see ya.”

When you made it back into your dorm you noticed a package in front of your door. Picking up and making your way inside you inspected it to make sure it was for you before opening it. The label read your name followed by the sender, Rarity Records. Your breath hitched.

You heard rumors that agencies were going to attend the talent show, but you weren’t sure you believed it. You carefully sliced the top of the package using a pair of scissors to unveil the contents. In the package you discovered a letter along with some snacks, stickers, and merch from artists that belonged to the label.

Dear L/n F/n,

We would like to congratulate you on your win last week! Your performance was beautiful and we believe you have a lot of talent. We’d like to invite you to join our label to help make you shine and prosper. Please contact us at this number. We await your call.

Sincerely,

Rarity Records

A label wants to sign you! Your wildest dream is on the verge of coming true! You had to tell someone!

“Oh my god, I have to text Eita,” you spoke aloud. Unplugging your phone from the charging cord and unlocking it, you quickly tapped on the conversation and typed out your message. You were about to hit send until you remembered the situation you were in.

Semi still hasn’t contacted you and it made you question if that concluded the end of your friendship. You’re well aware that you directly told him not to speak to you but at the end of the day it’s not like you yelled at him and made it into a huge argument. You missed your best friend. You know you should text him, he probably doesn’t even realize what’s wrong but you were hurting too much internally to reach out to him, even if it was exciting news that you know he’d congratulate you on.

You deleted the message and connected your phone back to it’s cord and made your way to your blow dryer. Once you finished drying your hair you went back to your phone to turn on some music to listen to while you get ready.

You sang along to the song and all the songs after that as you were getting ready. The last step was to put on the dress that you had. It was a stunning red dress with some gems and lace here and there but the glam wasn’t overwhelming.

“Knock, knock. Can I come in?” Tendou asked from behind your door.

“It’s locked and I’m getting dressed! give me a second!” you answered. You had the dress on, just couldn’t zip it up completely. Giving up on your attempts you made your way towards the door to let your friend in. “Hey,” you greeted when you opened the door.

Tendou’s back was leaning against your door before so when you opened it he stumbled back a bit but was quick to catch his balance. He pivoted and looked up from his phone only to be welcomed by your beauty. His eyes went wide before opening his mouth to speak. “I- you look, wow.”

You gave a small chuckle before attempting to greet him again. “Hi, Tendou.”

“Hi..” he answered, still mesmerized. “Sorry, you look really beautiful tonight.”

“Thank you. I was nervous about the bright red but it turned out really nice. Oh, do you mind zipping it up and clasping it for me?” You asked as you twirled around to expose your back to him. He raised his hands to do as you asked, careful not to get the zipper caught. When he was done you turned your body once again and closed your door to leave with him. “Let’s go, I’m starving,” you laughed as you grabbed his wrist to pull him towards the parking lot, failing to notice the bush on his face.

-

Tendou and you arrived a little late to the dinner due to the fact that you were having too much fun chatting in the car that he missed the turn three times, but eventually you arrived to your destination.

“You’re late, Tendou,” Ushijima said when you both arrived to the table.

“Only fifteen minutes. Here you go, Y/n,” Tendou spoke as he pulled out your chair for you.

“Oh, thank you,” you blushed as he helped you settle into the group. The lineup went as Ushijima’s date, Ushijima, Tendou, and you next to him. On the other side was Semi’s date, Semi, Reon, and then Reon’s girlfriend, the girlfriend being across from you.

Throughout the dinner you had a smile on your face. It was definitely awkward at first since it was the first time you were seeing Semi in the past week. You decided to communicate as little as you needed with him, not to make a point, but to be polite. You didn’t need to somehow ruin anyone’s night in any way. You were all together to have fun and enjoy the little time you all had left together in high school.

While you were enjoying yourself and chatting with the other’s, Semi found himself glancing at you every once in a while. He was right to believe you and Tendou had something going on, Tendou wouldn’t stop bringing you up to him during practice. Tendou always had something positive to say about you and now here he was, at dinner with you as his date.

Good for him, Semi thought to himself. Tendou finally made a move on you and got what he wanted. He was happy for his friends, but he felt uneasy. Why hadn’t you ever expressed your thoughts of his friend to him? You always called him your best friend but you never spoke about Tendou to him, only saying he was a nice guy if asked.

It made him question why you were so upset with him when you asked about his girlfriend. It’s not like you told him about Tendou which is why he didn’t see the need to tell you about his girl. He’d been wanting to talk to you about it but knowing how hot headed you both can be he opted to waiting for you to confront him first. He thought giving you time would be the best option.

“Semi, you should eat more before we go,” his date told him, distracting him from his thoughts.

“Oh, you’re right,” he responded before picking up his utensils to continue eating.

Taking one last glance at your form, he had to admit it was the prettiest he’s ever seen you. Your hair was done differently, your dress looked fitting, and the red really made you look hot. Your smile screamed that you were having a good time, a sight he missed seeing.

“The party has arrived!” Tendou spoke when your group entered the main doors of the gymnasium. You laughed at his silliness until Ushijima spoke.

“We should take pictures.”

“Good idea, buddy,” Tendou agreed. You all made your way over to some props and took turns taking pictures. Some were just the guys, the others just the girls, then group, followed by individual. Luck was favoriting you, you didn’t have to take pictures for Semi because him and Reon partnered up. You and Tendou did multiple poses, Tendou claiming you guys needed one from all angles, as Ushijima took pictures.

As you were getting your pictures taken, Semi was taking pictures for Reon. His eyes kept darting between both parties, lingering more on you than the couple directly in front of him. Semi was lucky his girlfriend didn’t notice but his friend sure did. Reon could tell how bad Semi wanted to talk to you and he couldn’t understand why he didn’t. Semi was never one to keep his thoughts to himself unless if it had potential to hurt someone else.

Reon excused himself from his girlfriend and explained what he was doing to which she responded with a nod. “Can we talk?” Reon asked Semi once they decided they were done taking pictures.

“Come on, let’s dance!” Reon’s girlfriend told Semi’s date before grabbing her hand and dragging her to the dance floor.

“What did you wanna talk about?” a confused Semi asked Reon.

“What’s up with you?”

“What do you mean?”

“You have your girlfriend right next to you and you’re paying more attention to your best friend. That’s not okay dude. You’re lucky they haven’t noticed.”

“What are you talking about? I haven’t given Y/n any attention. We haven’t talked since last week,” Semi countered to which Reon sighed.

“Listen, you may not be aware you’re doing this, but since they joined us at dinner, you haven’t stopped looking at them. Why are your eyes wandering so much when you have a girlfriend right there?”

“I noticed too,” Ushijima spoke up.

“Have I been glancing at them that much?”

“Yes.”

“I don’t know what’s going on between you two, but you need to talk it out,” Reon stated. The three boys turned to find you in the sea of people.

“There,” Ushijima spoke while pointing at the red hair that stuck out. “Go.”

With a gentle push from his friends, Semi walked into the crowd, careful not to step on anyone’s feet while saying excuse me to make his way towards you.

-

“How are you feeling?” Tendou asked you. Both of you were currently swaying back and forth, his hands on your waist as you held his biceps.

“I’m good. Tonight’s been a lot of fun so far,” you smiled at him.

He returned the gesture before removing a hand from your waist to the back of your head to bring you closer to him before putting it back down. “That’s good, but how do you feel?” he asked again, making you realize what he was really asking.

“Hmm.” Taking a deep breath to think you responded. “I still feel hurt, but I can’t find myself to be mad at him. I don’t even care about that girl, I don’t know her and don’t plan to be her friend. I just have to accept that if he wanted me, he would’ve asked me. It’s a tough pill to swallow but it’s the truth. I wish I didn’t hold onto the little hope I had and just opened my eyes to see he clearly wasn’t interested. We were just best friends, erm- friends- we’re just friends.”

Tendou changed his hand placement again. The hand that previously touched your head was back as his other hand rubbed circles between your shoulder blades. You didn’t feel like crying, you already did all of that last week. You had no more tears left in you and you just wanted to move on from the situation.

You and Tendou didn’t speak for a while, just swayed and listened to the song that was playing. “Can I tell you something? Tendou broke the silence.

“Yeah. What is it?” you asked.

“This is probably a bad time to tell you all of this. Semi is a fool, and I’m not saying that just because of his fashion sense. I don’t understand why he didn’t make a move on you because I am about to.”

His last line made you move your head so you were now making eye contact with him. “What?”

“I see your value. You are a treasure. Silly rocker Semi has overlooked what a catch you are. I never interfered because I knew of your feelings for him. I understand I’d just be a second option for you, a rebound if you will, but I’m willing to take any opportunity to get to know you better. I like you, Y/n. Can we get to know each other better?”

You were shocked. You knew Tendou as the friendly sightly crazy middle blocker on the volleyball team. You knew him as a class clown. You knew him as Semi’s friend. You never would’ve expected this moment to ever happen.

Tendou leaned a little closer to you which made you think fast. At the end of the day, you had nothing to lose, you already lost the guy you really loved. Leaning in as well, your lips connected. Unfortunately, it was at that moment Semi reached you both. It was at that moment Semi finally realized how he felt about you, but he didn’t feel like taking away the happiness from his friends for his own selfish feelings.

“Whoa dude, what happened?” Reon asked his teammate when he came back with a scowl on his face.

“I feel like a fucking idiot.”

—————

a/n: damn, this was supposed to be a Semi fic but here I am feeding the Tendou stans. Oopsies. ALSO I DID NOT THINK IT WOULD BE THIS LONG (and poorly edited again so another oopsies)

Tag: @pluviophilefangirl

[athena-is-a-chaotic-lil-shit]

Of Ice and Blood

Part 3

Hey there! Thank you for taking the time to read this

There are so many left out details here that I did on purpose for future explanation within the fic for the element of mystery I'm trying to brew . Hope you don't mind! Enjoy reading❤

Part 1

Part 2

Part 4 Part 5 Part 6

1.7k words.

Pairing: Tai'chi Kashharzol (Orc) x Pearl Blackbell (Human OC/Reader)

Warnings: cursing, violence, injury and fighting.

*

Without thinking, I drove my fist towards the voice, regretting it the instant I recognized who it was.

Tai'chi.

I shouldn’t have been surprised when I found my fist encased in his hand. He seems unfazed by my reaction, seemingly expecting it.

“Oh shi— I’m so sorry!”

How the hell did he sneak up on me without making a sound??

“Feisty- I mean, I should be the one sorry, for startling you...And for following you. I just wanted to, make sure you were alright.”

I blinked. He was concerned?

He spoke up when I didn’t respond.

“So, are you okay?”

“Y-Yeah. I’m fine. Just, disappointed.” I breathed in and sighed as he gently let go of my fist.

Oh, and his scent helps right now. He smells so...wonderful I don’t know why. It’s not like I’ve been surrounded by disgusting odors my entire life. I swear I’ve inhaled appealing scents like lilac, sandalwood, cinnamon, even rain has its particular smell! But Tai'chi, he—he’s something else entirely.

“Shouldn’t you be somewhere else like, I don’t know, maybe getting lunch with some of your friends or in a classroom?” I asked. I wonder why he would even bother to be in my presence. Anyone should be creeped out by the way I spoke up earlier. I mean, who does that? Plus, I did throw a stranger down to the floor. But part of me knows he deserved that.

Definitely.

“Want to talk about it?” He ignored my question. Tai'chi was now sitting cross-legged beside me, the oak’s root in between us. His deep azure eyes studying, watching me carefully.

“What?”

“What you did back there, wasn’t something a plain, timid college girl would do.”

Wait. He knew I was pretending to be one?

“Yes, I knew.”

“You can read minds?!” I stammered out. He can read my mind this whole time?! Shit.

He held up for a second before a boisterous laugh broke out of him and echoed through the circling trees, scaring away some birds perched above. I don’t know if I should be offended or flustered by his guffaw. It was so, so deep and rich and —

What the hell Pearl? What if he's reading your mind??

Tai'chi faced me again, sighing once he calmed down.

“To answer your question, no, I can’t read minds. But like I stated before, your face gives it away. Or your brows since you’re wearing a mask, but I can imagine your expression.”

I let out an incomprehensible noise.

“How did you find out I was pretending to be…you know,” waving my hands around.

“The moment we made eye contact this morning when you entered. And the way you shifted your body at the last second to prevent yourself from plunging into the trash bin, I knew you were something more. Your eyes and your actions show your experience in combat. A skilled warrior would notice these little things right away.”

My jaw fell open, and I’m sure he knows. He left me speechless.

Should I tell him I am a trained martial artist and a weapon wielder?

But we just met like 5 hours ago!

He seems trustworthy. And he’s an orc, didn’t they have a code of honor or something?

My thoughts ran wild I swear Tai'chi could hear my mind, screaming.

“Hey, it’s okay if you don’t wish to. And I must’ve sounded, creepy when I admitted I’ve been observing you. But before anything else, will you allow me to introduce myself, for real this time?”

“You mean your name isn’t Tai'chi?”

Letting out a chuckle, he replied, “I swear to you, my name is Tai'chi. What I mean is, I want you to know my full name. Do you understand what this implies, Pearl?”

I racked my brain for a moment, trying to recall what my parents said about orc traditions when my uncle, papa’s brother, married the orcess he fell in love with. Something about an orc’s real name being reserved only to those they’re close to?

“I guess so? But what exactly?”

“I want to become your friend.”

I couldn’t help the slight warmth creeping into my cheeks behind my mask. He can’t see it, can he? A friend, he says. A friend!

“Oh,” was all that came out. A pause and;

“Uh, I mean, I’d love to be your friend! I never had an actual friend before. I mean, have cousins, but we aren’t acquainted enough to consider myself their friend— I mean— uh, what should I do?” I blurted out a little rapidly.

He smiled. He actually smiled! Oh, damn, it was adorable!

Tai'chi was about to say something, but he snapped his mouth shut and grimaced. I was confused by his sudden change of mood, along with his scent.

Then it struck me.

The two of us shot up when multiple smells filled the air, making my stomach clench.

We were followed, not just one but six individuals. One of them was the pretentious human from earlier.

My day can’t get any better. And is that a baseball bat? Great. Fucking great.

I swear. I’m cursed to find trouble anywhere I go.

“Hello, freaks.” The guy in the middle began. “Whatcha doin’ out here in the forest?”

The others began spreading out and surrounded us.

“Planning something nasty I bet.” A human to my right spat.

“You will pay for what you did to me, you bitch. Just so you know, my father is the dean of this university. No one will ever hear a word of what I did here and what we will do to you.

'Dean’s son, David Silverstone, assaulted by an insane student in the woods within campus grounds. His friends graciously helping him fight off the lunatic until she passed out and was carried to an isolation chamber for monitoring, later finding out about her severe psychological disorder.’ Now wouldn’t that be a hit in the papers!” The bastard and his companions cackled and snickered, some of them stealing glances between my legs and I felt my skin crawl.

Tai'chi growled lowly, silencing them for a brief moment. He was getting mad but held his ground.

“And you,” the human pointed, “you beast. It won’t be hard antagonizing you, people will no doubt believe you were the one who violated the schoolgirl and left her in the woods to die.”

This fucking—

I felt a hand on my shoulder just as I was about to start, gently gripping, in hopes of trying to calm me down. He knows they were baiting us on making the first move. He shook his head, and an idea popped up.

Taking a deep breath, I attempted to make my voice as girly as possible, sounding so hilarious, like those overdressed, flashy high school girls with flowery perfume so strong I wrenched every time I get a whiff of it.

Provoking them would do.

“Oh, I’m so scared! Should I get on my knees and beg for mercy? Oh please, great and noble one, have mercy on my poor soul.” My voice laced with mockery and sadness, with my legs fake trembling and my arms flailing.

And did Tai'chi just snort?

“If you beg nicely, I will perhaps give you a chance to— ”

My sudden wheezing interrupted him and I laughed. Hard. I can’t believe he bought my terrible acting! I expected him to straight-up be offended rather than actually bite the false bait. He is dumber than I thought.

I was holding my middle by the time I was done. Tai'chi’s shoulders were moving slightly, probably chuckling and trying to hold back his amusement.

“Did you honestly take it seriously??? I can't— oh my God!” I choked out once more before I went on.

“There’s no chance in hell I’m gonna bow to you, not even one degree of an angle, you foolish, idiotic, spoiled, bastardized son of a bitch.”

His face was turning red out of rage and oh! Wasn’t that a sight to behold?

“You brat!” Turning his head to the others, he yelled, “What are guys standing there for?! Get them!”

Good.

Perhaps they didn’t catch my hands slipping on my beloved crimson knuckle dusters out of the bag when I was laughing then, tugging down my hoodie’s sleeve to hide it.

“Don’t move.” I told the orc, whose eyebrows shot up in surprise.

“But—”

“Just don’t.” I said with my voice firm. I will take them on my own. I can’t have him getting in trouble and people blaming him for being an orc. Imagine that. The ones who attacked him will be viewed as victims because they were up against him, an orc. Numerous humans will jump at the chance to throw dirt at their race, a single act of self-defense treated as a one-sided assault to humans, the thought of it being enough to somehow remove all of them from the city, but everyone knows it's not that simple. Dimwits.

I strode forward without earning his response, waiting for the first person to come at me.

I took my stance, although it was more of preparing half of my body since I was still hiding both of my hands.

They all seemed confused and hesitant, which was what I was going for. To me, and those with experience in hand-to-hand combat, this is one of the most basic stances, but fundamental, nonetheless. A simple form that can determine the outcome of a fight. With my right foot forward, left foot back, both firmly planted to the ground, and my dominant hand wearing my dusters. In their eyes, it was…wrong, foreign. Some may even say it’s an open vulnerability, showing how inexperienced the opponent is, but oh, it is the exact opposite.

I didn’t see Tai'chi’s expression, though. I was on alert and getting into my zone to peer at him, one motion that can put me in a compromising position. Did he notice my brass knuckles? Likely.

“Scared to hurt a little girl like me?” I enticed.

Finally, the one beside their alleged leader charged at me.

A typical amateur approach.

The guy, about two inches taller than me, threw a right punch, which was a huge mistake.

Predictable.

I smirked under my mask and dodged it not a second before it connected. Making him falter as I grabbed his arm and brought it down to my knee, dislodging his joints.

A high-pitched scream of pain broke out of him as he dropped down on the forest ground, gripping his bent-off arm, cursing, but refused to rise and fight me again.

I gave him one last glance before I looked back at the others.

“Who’s next?”

****************************************

Those human shits just can't leave them alone! Interrupting their supposed-to-be official introduction! There's more to the orc that meets the eye *wink* Who is he exactly? Why was he so... observant?

Part 4 is actually on its third revising— and I'm still trying to come up on HOW to phrase my next words to lead to part 5. I let me brain take a break from spewing senseless words for now so I'll probably post the next part of this later or tomorrow

Anyways, I hope you enjoyed! And I'd appreciate it if you have some advice for me, or just point out some mistakes I made! Thank you

Ps. This is really not perfect formal writing if you're wondering. I just type away whatever comes into my mind, and then proofread it to the best I can. And I hope you don't mind me using a lot of spaces. It... sort of makes my mind clear and continue moving forward, and it helps me when I'm reading it again, mentally taking note that with every line between spaces there's a slight pause and again, read it clearly like you were the one thinking it. I don't know how to explain how my own brain works but I guess that's that?

Tags: @kokokatsworld @crackinanutshell

[miraculousandbts]

BTS | AMAs

P.S. The story is in y/n's perspective. Just because I wanted to.

Summary: You get your first big nomination, but you just had to stumble into a very handsome stranger.

Pairing: OT7 X Reader (Platonic)

Genre: Fluff

Word Count: 2.2k

Warning: Reader’s train of thought goes crazy every once in a while. I feel like this should be a warning.

I was hugging my manager and jumping in circles with her, as a way of expressing my happiness. Ashley was not only my manager, but also one of my closest friends, always supporting me and believing in me since the start. Both of us were ecstatic with the news, and this was our way of showing it. Aside from jumping, we both were also screaming very loudly. I had never been so thankful for having a house near the forest area without neighbours.

Oh, wait! I never introduced myself; how rude of me. (Yes, I was thinking about the Thea Stilton books...) I'm y/n, a singer and songwriter. I live in LA. Me and Ash were just watching the American Music Awards nominations, and we just couldn't control our excitement when they took my name. This was my first nomination for an award. It wouldn't be that big of a deal for an experienced artist or someone who has been in the industry for long, but I'm still a rookie, debuting only two years ago.

Me and Ashley finally calmed down when a very startled guard came in and told us that we screamed so loud that he saw bats fly away from deep inside the forest. We sheepishly apologised, and decided to go to sleep. I had been recording a song the whole day, while she had been busy with manager duties, so we both were exhausted. I had actually known her for the last four years, and she often stayed over. So often, in fact, that my guest room had become 'Ashley's Room' very quickly.

After bidding each other happy good nights, we both went to bed in our respective rooms, falling asleep speedily.

*****

Taylor was applying my makeup, while I sat in the stiff makeup chair. This had been going on for the past hour, despite me telling her that I wanted light makeup and a simple dress. Instead, she and my stylist Ben decided to go against my wishes for once. Ben had prepared an extravagant dress too fancy even for a royal ball, and I was thankful it wasn't pink or blue or yellow; I absolutely did not want to look like a princess, that just wouldn't be me. Taylor kept on applying a little too much makeup on my face for my liking. She was very talented, so at least I was sure I wouldn't look bad.

Right now, she was working on my eye makeup, expertly putting on eyeliner and...something. I'm not good with this stuff. Taylor's assistant, whose name I always forgot, was painting my nails. I looked at her working. She was a pro at this. She smoothly glided the brush over my nails, effortlessly painting them purple, and then decorating them. She used as less materials as possible, knowing I hated it when even my nails felt heavy; my face was enough.

After two more hours of torture, I was finally ready. I looked breathtaking, but if I had an option, I would still go with something lighter. After another hour of sitting in the limo, we were finally there.

I got out, and there were cameras in my face. All I saw were purple blotches, because the camera men couldn't use their brains enough to shut off the flash. Or maybe those cameras didn't have an option to shut off the flash.

Anyway, I struck a few poses, blew some kisses, and walked ahead. And then I saw Dan. He was a reporter for such gigs, and I often did short interviews with him. He wasn't like the others; he didn't ask about rumours or made new ones, he didn't ask controversial questions to increase their channel's TRP.

I gave him a grin and walked towards him.

"Hey, Dan."

"Y/n! Looking beautiful as always."

"Oh, you flatter me." I kept a hand on my chest.

"Okay, stop with the over dramatics, girlie." You grinned.

He motioned his cameraman to start recording. I tuned out the whole introduction, and focused when he asked me a question, the said question being how was I feeling about being here even though it hadn't been long since my debut. "It's all thanks to my fans. I love making music, and I believe that if you do something with true passion, you will be successful. I guess this is destiny's way of showing me that what I'm doing is right. And not gonna lie, it feels like I've been feeling like I'm on a sugar rush since the nominees were announced, because of the adrenaline."

After some more questions and smiles, I finally went in.

I was too focused on not tripping on my own feet because of the long dress, so the first thing I did after entering was bump into someone. Great! I wasn't even surprised anymore, knowing how I was. "I am so sorry!" I looked up with wide eyes, only to meet kind brown ones. It took me a second to register that he wasn't alone, six other men behind him. They seemed familiar. I could tell they were from east Asia. I glanced at all of them, and then looked at him, apologising again.

"It is okay." He had a cute accent to his English, and I internally smiled, not only because of his accent, but also because he wasn't mad. I must've smiled in relief, because he looked amused. Now that I was looking at him properly, he was handsome, with a capital H. Little round face, pretty eyes, cute boop-able nose. And then he smiled. And then I died. It was the cutest smile I had ever seen!

Thankfully, I wasn't the kind of gal who would stand there checking him out. All of this took me a second, and I excused myself after thanking him.

*****

"Oh, hey!" I heard a smooth deep voice as soon as I sat down. I looked to my side and found one of the friends of the man I had bumped into earlier. I was right, my brain didn't forget. I smiled a small smile. "Hey."

Extending my hand towards him the old fashioned way, introduced myself. "Y/n."

He shook my hand, seemingly unfazed by my apparent childish behaviour. "Kim Namjoon, more commonly known as RM."

That's when it clicked. RM. K-Pop. BTS. My eyes must've widened; I was always terrible at hiding my emotions. "Everything okay?" He brought me out of my stupor. "Uh, yeah. Just, when I stumbled into one of you guys before, you all seemed familiar, I just couldn't place your faces anywhere." I replied honestly. "Oh." He simply leaned back into his chair and nodded.

"So, in which category are you nominated?" He continued.

"Top social artist. You?"

"Same. It'll be a four year streak for us if we win again."

"Ooh, really. Well then, I hope you win."

"Don't you want to win?"

"Coming here already feels like a dream. I don't think I can handle the adrenaline if I do win."

"So basically you want us to win for completely selfish purposes, huh?"

You both laughed at that remark, and continued making small talk for a while. Then he said he had to use the washroom. I hummed in his direction, and as soon as he got up, I saw the guy I had ran into in the chair next to his.

He had noticed Namjoon getting up too, so he was looking on my direction. He grinned at me, and sat in Namjoon's chair. "Hello."

"Hey."

"I am sorry. My English is not that good. Only Namjoon speaks English." He sheepishly rubbed his neck. "Why are you apologising for that?" I was genuinely curious. It was okay to not know perfect English. Even though I was a native English speaker, I still made mistakes. Everyone did. And the said language wasn't even his first language. "At the entrance, I wanted to talk."

"Oh. Well, You should have, I don't judge because of stuff like this." He smiled at that. "I will introduce you to them." He gestured to his band mates who were very engrossed in the show. Before he could do that, I interrupted him. "Hey, sorry. I haven't been in the industry for long, and I've only ever heard your guys' name, so...I only know RM and V? Is that right? So, yeah, I don't know your name."

I cursed at myself internally. Way, to go y/n! So damn awkward. He must've sensed my hesitation, because all he did was offer me his hand. Ooh, the old fashioned way. Good to know I wasn't the only one.

"Suga."

"Y/n." I shook his hand. Namjoon came back at that moment and him and Suga said something to each other in Korean. Wait, Suga? That does not sound right. Oh, right! It must be his stage name.

And then I facepalmed. Literally. I didn't think before my hand met my forehead. I must've made a pretty loud smack, because both of them were now looking at me like I was some weirdo. I sighed and slowly hid my face in my hands. "These kind of things always happen to me..." I mumbled.

I looked up when I heard them chuckling. I pouted, but I knew they could see the relief on my face that they didn't think of me like I was demented. "Don't worry, we've been living with these guys for the past eight years, these kind of things don't faze us anymore." Namjoon gestured to the other guys, who were still oblivious to their surroundings, absorbed in the performances.

I let out a breathy chuckle at the fact that they were so openly dissing their own friends. Namjoon, by now, was seated in the chair in which Suga was previously sitting in.

"So, I refuse to believe that Suga is your real name. And I would rather be literal friends with you guys, rather than two artists who just know each other."

"Yoongi. Min Yoongi." The way he said it reminded me of how Geronimo Stilton introduced himself. 'Why my brain has to go down completely random memory lanes is beyond me...and why am I thinking about a kid's book series?'

Within the next hour, I had been introduced to the other guys, and all of us were conversing about anything and everything. Seokjin was very happy that I was loving his dad jokes, Hoseok was a little too excited about my proposal of shooting a dance cover on one of mine or their songs, Jimin, Taehyung and me got along very well, as we were all the same age, and Jungkook had offered to teach me boxing, after I expressed my wish to learn it.

All in all, I was getting along very well with them. They were fun to be with, and it was absolutely adorable how they sometimes got flustered over their mistakes while talking. After the fun night ended, I congratulated them on their win, and went home, completely exhausted.

*****

"Noona!" Jungkook was the first to notice me. With wide eyes and a happy grin, he came to hug me. I had decided to surprise the boys by coming to Korea. Right now, I was standing in their dance studio. Even after four years, we were still going strong. It felt like now I had four elder brothers, two twins, and a kid. '...that was a terrible reference...god, please tell me what is wrong with me.'

Soon, all the boys came to hug me, though I tried running away to avoid their sweaty hugs, but Jungkook held me at one place, while I tried to squirm away. I should've just waited in their dorm.

"Kookie!" All I got in reply was a mischievous giggle. He really was a baby. Later that day, a collaboration between us was confirmed, and I couldn't have been happier.

Geronimo Stilton and Thea Stilton might be kids’ books, but they’re still the best!! Change my mind, I dare you.

[tory-ben-hi-shelton]

my favourite quotes from seizure

That's what we call ourselves. Virals. It seems appropriate to have a group name after becoming a gang of genetic mutants. It's good for morale.

Observing Ben'a struggle, Hi scratched his chin. Glanced at me. Shrugged. Then he quietly slipped around Ben. And, without ceremony, kicked him in the ass. Hard.

Faster than thought, Ben grabbed Hi and wrapped him in a vicious bear hug. "Smart ass."

Hi sputtered, gasping for air. "Back off! I don't like you that way!"

Ben laughed.

Hi slogged back to the beach. "I let him win. He needs the self confidence."

"Right."

"Hey, I'm a giver."

"A saint."

It was good to see Ben laugh again.

"Not nice," I joked. "You'll sour Jewish-Sewee relations."

"It's true, I take it back," Hi said. "Our people have a rich history of mutual respect. Long live the alliance!"

"Score one for your honker."

"Thanks, I think." I cocked my chin at Hi's substantial midsection. "Nice abs."

"Yeah, I work out twice a month. No exceptions. But stop hitting on me, it's embarrassing."

Then, almost as one, the boys looked at their screens. Directly at me.

Huh? I was the youngest. The only girl. Why was I in change? No matter. I was in totally agreement.

"You can't be serious." Shelton groaned, eyes returning to his laptop. "I'd nearly hacked Ben and Jerry's website when you called. We could've been eating free Chunky Monkey right now."

"This is a rip-off dude. Twenty pages, and I still don't know what these people do. But here's a JPEG OF A DIAMOND RING. VERY HELPFUL."

"We need some kind of plan," Hi said. "We can't allow ourselves to be split up. I don't want to be a freak alone. Been there, done that. I like having friends."

"Stop whining, hippie." Ben crossed to Hi and mussed his hair. "We'll figure something out. But no spazzing inside the bunker. I won't allow it."

"I have a cotillion event. Some yacht-club charity fundraiser thingy. Whitney is insisting and Kit took her side." Three wide smiles. "Oh shut up."

But now Ben was here. For some reason. "Fine by me." A wry smile crossed Tom Blue's lips. "But you don't have to ride with my boy if he's bothering you, Tory."

Ben scowled, reddened, but kept quiet.

"No, that'd be great!" I said quickly. "Thanks, Ben. Thanks anyway, Tom!" Ben cast off with more haste than usual. I could hear his father chuckling as as began to pull away.

It occurred to me that Ben was an attractive guy. Even when brooding. Hell, especially when brooding.

Wolf: Haha. Come over now. Grab Shelton if you can.

Green Lantern: Boo. I thought you were hitting on me.

Wolf: Nope. Still intimidated by your good looks.

Green Lantern: Understandable.

"Why does everything girlie smell so delightful?"

"Because we acknowledge the importance of basic hygiene. And periodically clean our bathrooms."

"Brilliant. I should write that down. After all, it takes a village."

"She's famous, really famous, because..." He stopped dead. "Wait."

I met his gaze levely. No point in being discreet now.

"No." Shelton shook his head. "You can't be serious. That's your plan?"

"What plan?" Hi asked.

"You have a better idea?" I crossed my arms. Defiant. And a little self conscious.

"But that's not even a real plan. It's a joke. Why not just chase rainbows looking for lucky charms?"

"What plan?" Hi repeated.

"I'm not claiming it's a slam dunk." I said.

"It's not even a full court shot," Shelton said. "Blindfolded. Underhand. With a bowling ball."

"We have to try something."

"WHAT. PLAN." Hi. Exasperated.

Ben walked in and popped the back of Hi's head.

"WHY. ARE. YOU. YELLING."

"Wonderful." Hi slid to the floor. "First ignored, then attacked. I need new friends. And a lawyer."

"I meet very few people your age who know of her."

"We're very advanced," Hi said earnestly. "I can even zip my own pants. Most times, anyway."

I glanced over my shoulder. Ben, Shelton, and Hi stood behind me, shoulder to shoulder. Scowling. A solid wall of opposition.

Deep breath.

"Guys..."

"Absolutely not!"

"Crazy woman!"

"I just got out if trouble!"

Okay. Bad start.

"Who sold you that box, anyway?" I asked.

"Piss off."

"Hey!" Ben shouted. "Watch your mouth."

Ben stepped towards the counter. Hi grabbed his arm as Shelton placed a restraining hand on his shoulder.

"Thanks, but Ben is picking me up."

"Ben." Jason shook his head. "I guess you're taking community service to heart," he quipped.

"Out of bounds," I warned. "Ben's a good friend."

"He's a prince. Enchanting. Tell him I miss him."

"Fine." Not a care in the world.

Hi leaned close to his screen. "What'd do you mean, 'fine'?"

"Don't come with me," I said. "I'll go by myself."

The boys all spoke at once.

"Don't be a drama queen." Hi.

"You can't go alone." Ben.

"Somebody has to watch your back." Shelton.

I grabbed Hi's shoulder. "Go! Do your thing."

"You're pretty casual with my life, you know."

"Go!"

"Let's see those elbows," Ben demanded. "You left a bloody streak in the shaft."

I let him inspect my wounds, glad he'd forgotten to be mad at me.

"Hi." Shelton panted. "I love you, man."

"Back at you." Hi spat globs of filth. "I'm going to kiss Ben now, in case some of you don't want to watch."

"I'll pass." Ben ruffled Hi's hair.

My head broke the surface. I took a giant breath.

"Tory!" Ben's face was inches from mine. "You okay?"

"Fine," I said. "Dandy. I bonked my head."

Ben looked at me oddly.

Hi shuffled over, grasped my hand, and deposited a sloppy kiss. "I'm in your debt milady."

"Tory!" Eyes popping. "What in God's name are you doing here?"

"You said you needed rescuing. I haven't slain any dragons yet, but the day is young."

"Humouring you means getting in the water." Hi grumbled. "It better be worth it."

Shelton slapped Hi's shoulder. "Seeing you in a wet tee is reward enough."

"Thanks, guys." Flat on his back, rubbing a shoulder. "Don't worry about me."

"Suck it up," said Shelton. "You dropped our fearless leader."

"Just hear me out!"

"I don't wanna!" Shelton whined. "You'll start talking, and pretty soon we'll all start nodding, and then the next thing you know, I'm hang gliding off the Effiel Tower at midnight chased my ninja vampires. No deal!"

Ben smacked the back of Shelton's head.

Once I got them listening, their curiosity always won out. It's what I loved best about them.

"I already counted them," Ben said. "Lose any, you'll be less a few fingers."

"That's twice you've insulted my honour, Blue. Pistols or swords?"

"Correction. That was your last warning. Test me again, and you'll limp for a very long time."

I caught the other Virals in the corner of my eye. "What?"

Ben was staring, jaw open. "Good Lord, Tory."

"Nice shooting, Scarface." Hi handed me Duncan's weapon. "Remind me to never owe you money. Who taught you to fire a gun?"

"Long story." I wasn't answering 'drunk grandfather' true or not.

"Tory, a father isn't suppose to fear his fourteen year old daughter. That being said, you terrify me."

"We need to thank my great-great-great pirate grandma."

Kit's eyebrows shot up. "Your what?"

"Nothing. Just kidding."

Maybe.

Kits generosity had benefitted the Virals as well. Though a shockingly long list of museums, landmarks, and wildlife organizations had banned us for life, we'd avoided criminal charges.

[brokenmusicboxwolfe]

I wrote this a while ago (4 months?) . Sorry it’s so long, but that’s the drawback of insomnia and no one to gush about a movie to...

Short verson? Unexpectedly I really liked an obscure old western called To the Last Man, basically because the romance at it’s center really connected with me. 

It’s interesting when a movie takes you by surprise.

I’ve been watching a a DVD set Pop fished out of a $5 bin a very long time ago. It’s one of those “20 movies crammed onto two discs, and how watchable the image and sound are doesn’t matter” kind of things. And geez, some of these look horrible. In the case of one movie there were times I couldn’t even tell which character was on screen. These are the sort of churned out discs where the just throw whatever they can get a hold of onto it, quality be damned.

 Not being a huge western fan, and having recently endured a similar set of early John Wayne films Pop had * I wasn’t looking forward to it at all. Still, it was the last of the unwatched movie DVDs so I figured I might as well play them.

Turns out they have been a facinating variety of westerns, covering at least 40 years. For instance one film was a a spaghetti western that actually involved a circus ** and a film next to it was a pilot to a 1970s tv show set in 1914 with the heroes traveling the west in a car. 

Which leads me to the biggest surprise so far, a barely movie length film from 1933 called To the Last Man. 

Now I went into it expecting very little. It was one of those movies so short it wouldn’t be considered feature length now, a western staring Randolph Scott who always seems to fade from my memory as soon as I finish a film. *** Even after it started it seemed to be a Hatfield and McCoy style family fued migrating west, with an already old fashioned silent era quirk of putting the names of the character and actor on screen when they first appeared. And then they added a Romeo and Juliet to the story…

Again I had low expectations, When they introduced the girl, daughter of the baddie family, I thought I knew exactly where it was going. Once out west the girl is a bronco busting, sometimes trouser wearing despite being the 19th century, kind of gal. I liked her, which made me dread the romance ahead.

See stories have traditionally had problems with romances involving  non-traditional women. 

In some stories the woman will be there for the fella, saving his life or something like that, but whatever affections he may have for her the love will be unrequited. Sometimes she dies, sometimes she gets a supporting character love interest, but always the hero goes off with the traditional princess type girl.

 In the stories where there is dainty, aloof beauty for the hero to moon over instead, they go a different route. Those are the stories where women are tamed. The hero often mocks and teases the woman for her non-traditional ways, even outright bullying her and accusing her of not being a “real” woman. She goes through an awkward phase of attempting to be properly feminine, to humorous effect, before eventually transforming into what a woman is “supposed’ to be for the love of her man.

I hate those, both of them. With the first,  I find myself grumbling the gal is to good for him if he cares more about a proper bit of styling and pretty face than courage or kindness. With the second, it’s even worse. Love does NOT demand that the person you love deny their nature and remake themselves to satisfy your tastes. If they have to change into something else to earn your love then you don’t love them at all. 

Anyway, I was sure how this was gonna go, especially with references in the conversation between the father and his thug pal about her wildness. This was gonna be a taming. I liked her as she was, and they were going to break her…

But I was wrong! 

The initial “meet cute” involved her swimming (naked…it was1933) and being harrassed by the thug until the hero rides up and intervened. When afterwards they chatted I was surprised. Sure it was flirty and established their attraction, but in more authentic way than I expected. When he refered to her as a lady and she assumed he was mocking her, in most movies there would be truth in her belief. But not here. To be honest I was as thrown as she was by his sincerity.

Later she talked to one of her father’s men, trying to figure out how a lady would dress because she wanted to dress that way before heading out to find the hero. I thought, “oh no, here it comes”, but again I was wrong. The conversation was sweet as the guy used his mother as an example and offered to help the girl go shopping, only to have her say she couldn’t wait that long. The hero would be camping for the night nearby, so she would have to go find him wearing her usual ratty clothes. She did NOT do the comedy attempt to fancy up!

And then we get to the campfire scene.

They may have met while she was swimming, but he has a body too. She surprises him as he shirtlessly shaves, so there is a bit of admiring the male form, complete with her saying she would think he was “soft” (for shaving so often in her rough world) if it weren’t for the fact she could see his strong arms. Even now too many movies don’t do something as simple as this: Let the man be physically admired by the woman.

During their conversation after he dresses, for all her attraction she is also self conscious of her rough around the edges appearance. When he notes her bare feet must find the mountains painful, she is defensive, expecting it to be a slight. But he quickly reassures her that no insult was meant, and it’s true. He didn’t. Not once in that scene, or in any scene, did he ever belittle her or tell her that she is somehow wrong for being herself.

When he was ready to say goodnight she announces she is staying. While she does tell him he must treat her “like a man” for the night, it’s still a woman boldly telling a man she’s spending the night with him whatever ended up happening after the fade out.

Now next morning she fixes him breakfast. In most movies this would either be the comical “non-traditional woman inept at proper womanly skills” or it would be the “non-traditional woman embraces properly womanly role because of love”. It was neither. She fixed him breakfast, an affectionate gesture to be sure,  but no fuss was made of it. She cooked it skillfuly and he didn’t seem astonished. It was just….breakfast.

Naturally as they are now head over heels for each other, this is when they find out each other’s family names, with the expected emotional turmoil. Now you would expect a few hostile scenes between them before they get over the whole feud thing, but they actually get over it quickly. By the time he buys gifts for his reunion with his family, he buys one more gift for her. And sure, when he leaves it where she can find it she at first angrily tosses it in the fire…before fishing it out. The fact is they are still in love, family war or not.  

About that gift..yes, it is a dress, but it doesn’t feel like a judgement or a nudge but a gift given with love of something she desires. He doesn’t know that when her father got out of prison he commented on her shabby dress,which she explained was her only dress after the hard life she’d had to live. He does know she was self conscious about the dress she wore when they met. It feels like a thoughtful gesture.  

The next time they are together, her family has stollen his family’s horses and she is joyfully riding the horse his brother had recently given to him. This would be a  moment for a lot of shouting and protesting that their own families were in the right. Instead we see little of the encounter except from the viewpoint of the distant thug. Considering the couple kiss and he smilingly sees her off on what had been his horse, I really don’t think there was much shouting.

Naturally the thug, who has designs on her,  tells her father abouther romance. The dress she’d hidden away is dug out as proof. She defiantly says she intends to wear the dress at her wedding to the hero, and her father lashes her. It’s off camera but we see him swinging the whip, so whoa, horrible daddy there! 

Stuff happens with the feud, which I’ve almost totally ignored**** despite it being the main plot, which culminates in the thug engineering a rock slide. The only survivor of the men folk from both clans is, of course, our hero. As he staggers to the girl’s home he seems horribly injured and dazed almost to senselessness. There is no sudden miraculous recovery for the sake of love scenes, fights or plot.  This is convincing the way 99% of all action movies ever aren’t when it comes to traumatic injuries. He needs care..

So here comes the thug. The girl quickly hides the hero in the loft and goes to work to deal with the villian. She has to feign normalicy, then react as he would expect her to react, while he makes clear she is to be considered his property and she has to figure out how to play that considering she is trying to hide her beloved. The dazed hero can hear what’s going on, tries to aim his gun, and drops it. The villian know the hero is there, so it’s time for a fight scene..l.

And the fight is between the villian and the girl!! And this is no dainty girly crap like so many movies have thrown at us. 

Mom and I used to have this thing of yelling at the screen “Hit him!!!!!” whenever heroes and villians would fight and the love interest would stand by looking helpless. I mean, I dunno about you but if someone is trying to kill someone I love they are gonna find themselves fuckin’ fughting TWO people!

And here the girl was doing some serious full body, roll on the floor punching and biting fighting. This wasn’t damsel in distress “You brute!” thumps at the chest or gingerly smashed vases on the head. She fought like she was trying to save the life of someone she loved. Which should be expected, but isn’t when watching an old western.

Alright, so the hero does finally do in the baddie by dropping down with a knife…but now that I think about it maybe SHE was the hero of the movie anyway.

Well, maybe to me she was because she was my identification character. Most of these westerns haven’t had women I could relate to at all, and here was one I related to on some very deep level. I got her. 

Now my family was nothing like hers, not only in the lack of violence (with the ones exception of a relative you can guess) but that they were hardly uneducated (say hello to the ONLY relative I even know of that didn’t graduate college…that would be me BTW) Heck, Pop was a total sweetheart.

And yet I got her. 

An unconventional woman type myself, I never learned the girly stuff. Partly that was accidental and partly it was impractical for the life we lived. I did have to be willing to be rough and tumble, with no line between guy stuff and girl stuff. When I was a kid I was also the only girl in a neighborhood of boys where being a sissy was the worst insult and you had to be ready to fight. I was the girl that swam in the river and played in the woods. And for various reasons ( would take a while to explain) I’ve spent most of my life in worn out work clothes. 

Actually that’s an aspect that makes her resonate even more: clothes. 

I don’t dress like her, but I have my own version shabby woods girl going on. As I write this I’m wearing one of my father’s old t-shirts with holes in it, jeans worn at the knees, a broken hair barrette in my hair, and steel toed men’s work boots on my feet. 

Now there are reasons for all of these. The practicalities of farm amd woods life, being poor enough I’d have to choose between new clothes or things like books, a childhood trauma that gave me a lifelong desire to dress for fight or flight, not having a social life so 99% of the time no human sees me, living in a rural area with no credit card for onlinr ordering and, in the case of the boots, just the fact they are all I can find locally that work with the ankle braces my flat feet force me to wear.

But notice what is missing from all these reasons: fashion. I almost never get to wear clothes I actually like. I’d flip through catalogs or wander stores and imagine wearing this or that. I have strong feelings about clothes I like or don’t, but no real chance to express it. I actually fantasize about that, living the sort of lifestyle where even if you are adventuring you get to pick clothes you want to wear.

Somewhere along the line people started assuming I what I wear reflects my taste, or rather lack there of. I used to ask my cousin at Christmas to please give me something pretty. She couldn’t understand it as a request, but folks just never thought of me as wanting pretty things. What would it have been like, just once, to try to be pretty. 

Actually I’d probably have been laughed at, a comedy buffoon, the hideous lady trying to look cute, the ugly step sister. Just as well life never gave me a chance to try. 

So being self conscious about my appearance is normal for me. I know how I look to people. I also know from experience that people can be cruel, and have taken my share of insults and mocking. In her position I would have thought he was making fun of me too and reacted almost exactly like her. In fact, I have. 

Here is a heroine I can relate to, and she gets the fantasy too. The fella falls in love with her, and loves her as is, not as a fix it upper. He loves her and doesn’t tease her about things where she is sensitive. He gives her a gift of something pretty just because he thinks she will like it. She gets to admire him (and his strong arms). She even gets to fight the bad guy to save him! 

Geez, of course I ended up loving the movie!

Never saw that coming, a Randolph Scott film I will actually remember! But the question is, will I finally remember his face or just his arms?

*NOT  a John Wayne fan, and these were some sort of 1930s filler less than an hour formula stuff.

**I REALLY enjoyed this one, but of course I have a thing for circuses. Woody Strode as a trapeze artist gunfighter and Victor Buono as the big bad were nice bonuses.

***That’s always puzzled me. I usually have an excellent memory for faces from movies, but I forget his instantly.

****Also forgotten, Buster Crabbe, Shirley Temple and the rest of the costars. 

[jaskaliina]

about gender

okay so this is basically just a rant about my personal views on gender so if that sounds boring you should just scroll down :)

in just a few years, i have gotten so much more secure in the way i present myself. i’m (probably) a girl (more about that later), and as a kid i LOVED yellow and pink and flowers and princesses and all that jazz. then when i got older i started to see all those things as kinda shameful, and since almost all my friends were guys i kinda felt like i shouldn’t like those things if i wanted to hang out with them. and so i just started kinda hating pink (+basically all pastel colours) and thought princesses were boring and flowers were for babies and so on.

then when i started hitting puberty society started being like AHEM, YOU, YES YOU, SHAVE YOUR FUCKING LEGS THIS VERY SECOND AND PUT FIFTEEN LAYERS OF FOUNDATION ON YOUR FACE AND FIND A BOYFRIEND NOW which was kinda stressful, and fortunately i didn’t really listen to it that much, but it still kinda became a little thing that just popped up once in a while and bothered me kind of a lot the older i grew.

now when i was about twelve years old i figured out that i was a lesbian and so the FIND A BOYFRIEND part kinda slipped away and i started dressing really butch because hey, this is kinda nice, i like flannels, i like having short hair, and then i came out and it went pretty well and yeah, that was cool. except i was in a terrible place mentally and basically wanted to throw myself under a train, but at least i had the gender and sexuality thing kinda figured out.

or so i thought. because that summer, on top of the suicidal stuff, i started questioning my gender. and so i was constantly wondering about basically everything, i kept myself awake at night trying to figure out if i was a GIRL OR A BOY OR SOMETHING IN BETWEEN AND HOLY CRAP WHY DOES GENDER EVEN EXIST AND WHAT THE FUCK HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT??????? (i’m not in that bad mental place anymore, i feel pretty good nowadays. no worries!)

at the moment i identify as a girl, even though i’m still a bit unsure. sometimes, when strangers struggle to figure out what pronouns they should use for me, or when they call me a ‘nice gentleman’ for holding the door for them, it makes me smile. it makes me feel great when people can’t figure out what i am, which kinda makes me wonder again. however, people calling me a girl or using she/her pronouns doesn’t bother me at all, and i’m pretty comfy with my body. i frequently call myself a lesbian, which feels right, and as i said the girl thing feels pretty great at this point in my life ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.

and gender roles? i honestly sometimes forget that they exist. i barely care about the way i present nowadays, and when people point out that ‘oh are you wearing a pink shirt? i thought you were more of a tomboy’ or ‘i thought you were a boy for a second, you should use some makeup’ it feels really strange. like, why does the way i dress have to have something to do with the way you treat me?

also, the things traditionally associated with girlyness (flowers, pink, caring about clothes etc) have become a more chill part of my life. pink is a nice colour! light colours in general make me feel happy and cute! flowers are so beautiful; have you ever seen a poppy? or roses? sunflowers? like, flowers are just amazing. i love finding nice clothes at the thrift shop! i have so many amazing sweaters and button up shirts that i adore, and that’s not a bad thing! being girly isn’t bad! neither is being more boy-ish! gender roles are sometimes kinda stupid, but they’re also fun to play around with, and us kids shouldn’t have to take them so seriously!

i guess the point of this post is just to kinda mark off how i feel right now. hope y’all have a great day!

-zab

(your friendly neighbouthood raccoon)

[lifeofbouyd]

12 Years Anniversary

Fred: Yow, da gyal deh nice eno bwoy. Mi ago circle har enz an try get di digits.

He walked away, heading straight towards her. Walking as if he was going to collect a trophy. She was nice, really nice, that I must admit. She’s one of the nicest girls I had seen in a long time. Her hair was well done, her nails freshly painted or at least so they seemed. Her face, done to perfection and her dress, looked expensive. It swung a little above her ankles and rested perfectly on her body. Outlining her killer shape. She had a gold ring on her “wedding” finger and stainless steel on her pinky. I watched them greet each other and what actually caught my eyes was, how much of a lady she was. She seemed well groomed and too good for my liking. A “goody two shoes” was my first thought. Girls like these are normally either married, rich, or have a rich man taking care of them. I smelled trouble, yet there was so much desire. I felt like she was worth having. Not just for a night, but someone I’d be with for a while. They exchanged numbers as I pulled that fairytale thought from my mind. I hexed that shit. I was already in a sinking ship, no land in sight. I’d rather drown on my sinking ship that jumps across on her boat.

Fred: Yuh see how di genna work youth. Ago fuck that quick eno. Yuh zimi.

I humored him, knowing he normally never pulls through with these kinds of chicks. I’ve seen it one too many times to think differently. Fred was good when it comes to picking up girls, but he’s always had me as his role model. I was lucky when it came to women. Always getting the “better-looking ones”. Most of which turned out to be faces without priorities. I’ve had to learn the hard way that not all glitters is gold. Sometimes they’re not even gold filled. Days passed and I had forgotten about her. He didn’t mention her and I never remember to ask. I guess when you have your hands full it’s hard to keep up with likes. I spotted her one day staring at, and from the looks of it, she had been staring for a while. Taking in my presence as if she wanted me to say hi. I hadn’t heard him mention her I a while but I still didn’t want to take his link like that. I learned later that day that she had no interest in men. She considered them a total waste of her time and feels she’s better off with girls. Now I shared her view. I love girls just as much as she does. I’ve always had a Fetish for lesbian. Clean girly lesbians that is. I’d never fuck a butch even if she paid me to. I imagined all the things she’d do to me, and all the things I’d do to them. Mostly what I’d do to her. I still didn’t say hi for a while. I wanted to build the suspense between us and make the first conversation memorable. I planned it down to the very last second, every possible outcome, and I always walked away with her number. Again, I caught her watching me. Paying keen attention to me from head to toe. I got my convo together, but by the time I turned around again, she was gone. I argued with myself for a while until I accepted the fact that I was moving too slow. Again I forgot about her. Living my best life. Caught up chasing other chicks I was brave enough to start a conversation with.

Someone pats me in the shoulder.

Her: Hi, I’m Rachel. Wasn’t sure when you were gonna say hi, or if you ever would so I decided to be the first to say hi.

I took a few seconds to inhale her cologne and pay keen attention to her Weldon’s face, her pussy cheeks spreading over her pants crotch crease. Her breast sticking me in the face, her slippers which seemed she got it from House of Style or some other expensive women clothing outlet.

Her: 🙃 You can say hi you know. I won’t bite, at least not yet. I wanna get to know you first.

I froze. My palms got sweaty and heart heated like a fifty caliber gun. Well, she did say she wouldn’t bite me. At least not yet. Obviously, she was interested in getting to know me. But why me though? Of all the guys she could have, if all the guys that had been chasing her, why get to know me? I entertained her conversation and played it cool. Acting like I didn’t want her. Our conversations started off slow with basic texts and friendly flirting. Somehow she killed my urge by saying she Christian. I don’t mind dating Christians, but what I don’t like is someone consistently reminding me. She tried to get me to see eye to eye with her beliefs, but I just wasn’t ready to take that journey. I only plan on getting married and baptized once and I don’t intend to do it for the wrong reasons. We stopped talking for a while because I had decided not to chase her. It was more like respecting her religion and not trying to get between her legs. We went from 2:00 am calls to every other day texting. It became somewhat of a long distance relationship or friendship or whatever it was. I had accepted the fact that I wasn’t gonna have her, at least not as easy as I thought. In my mind, she would give me her number and I’d take her home and make her scream my name. But reality..... mmm. Reality is a bitch.

Lucky for me, I saw her one evening when I was buying dinner at a famous Chinese food place. I offered to pay for her food however, she ended up paying for mine. Trying to show she’s independent I guess. We sat and chat for a while which made me realize we had a lot in common. She braced her body against mine for the first time when she was leaving. She whispered in my ear, “This could be all yours if you’re a good boy.” She sent chills down my spine and made my dick rock hard. She ran her hand across the front of my pants and smiled. I didn’t know if it was a good or a bad smile but I’m sure I could drill a wall with my shaft. I walked her to her stand where she laid a wet “chups” on my forehead. You know that trickling feeling you get when electricity runs through your body? That’s the effect she had on me. We sext all night, building curiosity between us two. She told me how she wanted to make me cum all over her and sanctify her with my rod. Now, I don’t like to count my eggs before they hatch, but I considered it a done deal. A few days passed and the fetish became a relationship. One I’ll always remember. The funny thing about it is, I had no plans whatsoever to be in any form of ships. But I was too far out in the sea by the time I realized what I had gotten into. To be honest, I really didn’t mind. Everything seemed ok. She said there was no husband, no boyfriend, no girlfriend or anyone of that nature, and she never gave me a reason to doubt her. Before I knew it I was in love. Head over heels kind of love. Shit. I wanted to run but I couldn’t. She had me hooked on her like a coke headed drunky. We moved from occasional hugging and texting to kissing and phone sex. I knew girls were horny but damn, she had no stop in her. It would seem she hadn’t been eating for a while and was just trying to take all she could get. I was down for that.

I invited her over one weekend with intentions of fixing her business. I cleaned the place from floor to ceiling and made it smell like a five-star resort. I even did a fancy spread on the bed to sell the look. White fluffy carpet on the floor and breathtaking scented candles lit on the wall. I loaded an Amazon video for her to watch while I took a shower. I came out in nothing but my towel on, trying to look super sexy for her. I popped us a bottle of Grey Goose and made my deluxe mix with a bottle of Rosè. A sweet, lingering, sparkling mix. Halfway between the first glass, she was already half naked, making herself at home. She turned the movie off and started playing sex songs. I watched her stretch and touched her toes before whining out her bra and underwear. Squeezing her nipples and biting her lips. Now I’ve seen a lot of fat pussy in my life, but she had something different. “Too bad you don’t eat”, she said with a smirk on her face. But even I did, I’m sure I’d suffocate somewhere there 😂. She pulled the towel off and reached for my dick. She gently stroked it as she ran her tongue up and down my leg. I couldn’t help but hold her head each time she moved. The sensation was unbearable. She then sat on top and slid her pussy back and forth the length of my cock, causing her to get super wet. Less than a minute or two she had already cum. “No condom, no love”, she said. Sliding her self back and forth on my dick. I slid my hand in the pillowcase and pulled out three packs of condoms. Scented, glow in the dark and ribbed. I slipped a ribbed on and made her ride herself to another orgasm before flipping her over on her back. I pulled her to the edge of the bed and beat her clit with my shaft. That shit made her squirt. Her pussy was gushing cum and I hadn’t even started beating it up yet. I slid my way inside her and stroked her slow and deep. Holding her neck with one hand while I held her leg with the other. Her eyes rolled back, she screamed my name, she vibrated, and vibrated, and vibrated again. All this cumin made her weak. I had her lap her legs around my waist and her hands around my neck. Standing upright, I held her waist and pulled her back and forth the length of my shaft, causing her to squirt like a broken wipe. She released her hand from around my neck and almost hit the floor. All that fun had made her weak. I braced her against the wall, high enough to give her the full length of my dick. I kissed and fucked and sucked her nipples until she begged me to cum. I spread her legs wide and struck her like lightning until I exploded. Again, she flooded me. Squirting so much the floor was soaked. She was so tired she fell asleep the moment I put her back on the bed. She was knocked the fuck out.

I had to drive her home that night. She was too tired to even bathe herself. We fucked several times after that and had many picnic dates which made me want her even more. Who does a picnic and have sex in the bushes? Before I knew what hit me we were inseparable. Living the life. #Relationshipgoals #Happylife #Bae. I had given in, putting my heart on the line. Expecting hers in return. I had it, I’m sure I did. God knows I had it. But like everything else in my life, that got fucked too. I remember being home one weekend, watching a movie and texting some chicks when my phone rang. A random 876 number. I don’t normally answer numbers I don’t know, but this person was calling a number very few people have. It must be pretty important. What if it’s work? What if it’s an x I haven’t seen in a while and would love to bang again. I missed the first call. I figured if it was important they’d call again. My other Jamaican number started ringing. To my surprise, it was the same number. Obviously, this person wanted something so I answered. I stayed mute and so did the caller. The call ran for like two minutes before the caller said hello.

Caller: Bouyd.... Hello, is this Bouyd?

Me: Who dis?

Caller: You don’t know me but I know you. I’m calling to warn you before you get too deep and something happens to you.

Me: What? Warn me? From who? Who’s this?

Caller: I’m Craig, Rachel’s man.

Me: Which Rachel?

Caller: The someone you tucked last week and dropped off after eleven.

Me: 😳🙄🤭😏🤤. I chuckled to myself for a few before responding. Oh, that Rachel, I know her pretty well. I see you know a lot.

Caller: Yes. I watched you follow her in and squeezed her ass at the door before leaving. I could have knocked you out but I chose not to.

Me: 😂🤣😳🤔 now this is serious. How could he possibly know this? Was he actually there? I bet this is a prank call. Breda, wa yuh want? Mi nuh run certain joke eno bad man. Talk fast or walk fast eno.

Caller: A loud mouth won’t help you son.

I hissed my teeth and ended the call. Who does he think he is? Calling me so late at night to talk about rubbish. At the same time, I was worried. He spoke facts. He knew exactly what I did. I did see a white car parked across the street that night that wasn’t normally there. He messaged me on WhatsApp to answer my phone. Like wtf? How did he even get my WhatsApp number? He called again and I answered. He explained who he was and how he fits in the big picture. He made me tea how long he’s been paying attention to my movements. He knew when we fucked, where we fucked, where we went on dates and even some stuff I’ve only told her. What stood out to me most was when he said, “I could have hurt you so many times but I chose not to because I figured she played you well. He sent me pictures to prove his speech and gave me very detailed information that he had acquired about over a few weeks. I didn’t know what to do. “Now that you know, it’s up to you to decide what you do from here.” He said good night and hung up.

Leaving me in suspense. A million questions ran through my messages be. How could she do this to me? How did a twelve years relationship fit in our four months of dating? Is that even possible? She never slipped up, she never gave me a reason to doubt her. She made me believe that I could have someone for me, myself and I. She made me open up and let her in. Shit 😔. Did I shit in a fucking church or something? Don’t I deserve to be happy without hiccups too. Sigh 😔. Where did I go wrong? Did I fall for her too quickly, did I put my basket where I can’t reach it, is this karma, did I hurt someone who God wants me to repent for? What do I say to her? Should I stay with her, is it safe. I thought with both my heads as I wanted to ensure I made the right decision. I loved her and I love fucking her, but is it worth my life? Would she die for me? What would she do if she was in my shoes? Do I even mention this to her? Sigh 😔. I stayed all night wondering if he had followed me home and was outside waiting for me to act us to ambush me 🤔. She called me several times but I didn’t answer. Could it be a test? What if he was using her phone to call me to see if I would answer? What if she was calling me to say it was a prank? I grew paranoid. He told me to be patient until I see her and I will see that everything he told me was true. So said so done. The new hair do courtesy of, the brand new phone and the marks on her neck. I wanted it to be a joke, I wanted her not to show up the way he said she would. I swallowed my heart that day. Tears ran down my cheeks and I couldn’t stop crying. Why was I crying though? It’s not like it’s first I’ve fucked a nigga’s chick. What was so special about her that I didn’t want to share? Then it hit me, it’s simply because I had fallen in love with an illusion she created. She had created me a photoshop life in 3D. I told her what happened and I told her how I felt. Shit, I even had the guts to say it was over.

She tried for weeks to explain that they were no longer together but I was beyond her white lies. She sent sexy pictures to make me miss fucking her, which I actually did. But I just couldn’t see past what happened. I guess I felt like I was cheated out the chance to choose to date her while she had someone. I would have felt a lot better if she had told me this from the start. I wouldn’t have had my expectations so high. She taught me a lesson that will part me through life. A woman knows what she wants and she knows just how to get it. Women don’t get caught cheating unless they want to get caught, and a woman will create the life she thinks you want to live.i could have lost my life, #Dead. To top it off she said I was ungrateful. She had put her life in jeopardy to be with me and I repaid her by breaking up with her and taking his side. But if she did that to him, what would she do to me? He had the house, the money, the car and I had nothing but a good old dick. I guess that’s what she wasn’t at home.

Life isn’t always about what you can offer. Everybody want vanity, but if they ain’t getting the amount of attention, sex or fun that they’re looking for; “bun” will be your best friend.

[parachutingkitten]

Season 3

STANDARD DISCLAIMER: I am going to be applying the concept of criticism to a TV show you presumably love and adore as much as I do. If you do not want your idea that the show is immaculate to be challenged, I would not advise reading past this point. 

ADDITIONAL DISCLAIMER: This post contains an insane amount of PIXAL

Mood for this season: This is fine... No... WAIT! WHAT?! NO!!!!!! WHAT IS HAPPENING??!!!!!!!?!?!

You don’t need to, but if you are interested, and haven’t seen my analysis of past seasons, you can find those here:

Pilot

Season 1

Season 2

Season 3! This should be fun. I remember when rebooted was announced, it was the biggest deal, my mom was analyzing the announcement poster. And then it came out, or at least the episodes popped up online in some random language. It was real bazaar. Fun fact, the one and only time I have ever pulled an all-nighter was to watch those episodes. I will never do it again, it was NOT worth it. Anyway, my initial impressions of the season... I hated it. I was pissed they killed off Dr. Julian, I was pissed they killed Zane, I was pissed that they gave him a token girlfriend, and I was pissed that because of her, my boy couldn't do spinjitzu anymore.

Now, if you know anything about me, you know that none of these opinions stand anymore. So, what happened? Well, I gave a shout out to the music department during season 1, and for this season I have to acknowledge the voice acting. Once the English versions of the episodes came out, I fell in love with all of it. Brent Miller, dude, props for this season. I watch his youtube videos and it's always hard for me to imagine him doing emotional stuff, but he does some DAMN good work this season. Also, Jennifer Hayward turned Pixal from my least favorite character ever created to my favorite. I am in LOVE with her voicework here! Also, Lee Tockar with Borg does a great job of making this character who really could have been a rehash of Julian his own unique and quirky character and, especially as the seasons progress, finds his place with the character. Richard Newman as Cryptor, yes, please! His voice is gorgeous! He makes Cryptor sound like he is having the time of his life tormenting Zane and I love it! Basically, the droids really shine this season. BUT... just because the voice acting is good does NOT mean that the writing is any good, whatsoever.

Plot

Yeah... there is a reason I hated it the first time I saw it. A lot of this dialogue is clumsy. A lot of the plot points are a bit on the nose. The whole idea for this season seems really strange. After they defeat the Overlord their next big battle should obviously be... the Overlord... again? And this time ice kills him. I mean, not to undermine Zane's sacrifice or anything, but wasn't the big deal last season that Lloyd was the only one who could stop him, and isn't the deal this season that the Overlord is back but even more powerful? How does any of this work? I have a way I think it might have worked a bit better, but I'll get to that when I cover the climax. There's a LOT of rocky stuff and it's all way to complicated, and I'll get to most of it later in the post, but one thing I would like to applaud this season on is the connections it ties to the previous seasons. As weird as the space episode was, it acknowledged a part of the Ninjago canon a lot of us were wondering about and managed to work it into a compelling mystery. This season addresses a lot of stuff from the past seasons and weaves it into the current plot in a way that makes all of these seasons feel like a part of the same connected universe and line of events.

Characters

So, all the ninja are teachers at the beginning of this... it further confuses the ninja age debate, but aside from that it's... fine.

The characters here I feel all get a bit more cartoony, and lean into definite rolls they play this season. Kai is afraid of technology this season, that is his character. Nya Jay and Cole have their thing this season, that is their character. Lloyd and Garnadon do... whatever they do this season. I feel like the plot kind of forgets about them for a bit. But I feel like everyone else in the season sacrifices some time so we can give some to Zane, which he deserves, but I don't think you had to sacrifice the complexity of the time they had in order to accomplish that.

Cyrus Borg (and Dr. Julien)

I'm going to say it. Dr. Julian had to die. Cyrus Borg and Dr. Julien cannot co-exist. This show has way too many "tech people" first it was Jay, and then his parents are there too, Nya gets the roll later on, Zane takes that up for a while after he finds out he's a robot, and then of course, his dad is going to be a tech genius, and when you want to add another tech genius to you regular canon, and it's not a hip young cool dude, it's a dorky maybe old man in a wheel chair, someone else has to go. Dr. Julien was set up as incredibly old already, so that would be an easy choice. Plus, think if Zane had his dad supporting him through all this? I think his growth would be less meaningful. Yes, it sucks that he just got him back, and now we just barely lose him, yes it sucks that it doesn't weigh down on Zane more throughout the season, yes it sucks that he's dead. He was an adorable crazy old man and we all loved him to death, and everything with Zane made my heart melt. But on a level it's kind of nice to know that he most likely died with his son by his side, quietly enjoying the last days of his life in peace. But hey, let's not dwell on what we lost, let's focus on what we got out of it; Cyrus Borg. I friggin love this man! He's smart, uncontrollably smart. He has crazy ideas he's not afraid to test, not necessarily in a mad scientist crazy sort of way, but in a "why not?" Sort of way. I feel like he embodies the times when someone is like "how does that work?" And someone else goes "SCIENCE!" That's Cyrus Borg. He's filled with so much hope even though the world keeps giving him total crap for doing it. That little half-smile he does just perfectly sums it all up. Like seriously, let’s admire how much this man has been through, the responsibility on his shoulders, and how well he is mentally despite all that. He has some serious willpower and optimism. I can admire that.

Pixal

Alright. My favorite character in the show... I hope I do her justice. Pixal is not particularly well written, and the series has a habit of completely ignoring her for large chunks of time but, I think I admire Pixal more for what she stands for to me personally.

I don't dislike strong females. They're fine. But I am not really the tomboy type. I am the girliest girly girl in the world. I grew up watching princess movies, I wanted to be one, I still want to, I love the color pink, I love wearing dresses, I like being a feminine person, that is who I am. I hate the stereotype that modern TV shows have of masculinizing the girls in their show in order to claim that they're "strong female characters" just because they can beat people up and hate wearing makeup and dresses and stuff because then I feel bad about myself in the process. You'd better bet I threw something at the screen when Nya said she didn't like wearing dresses. Girl, you used to wear a dress on the daily!

Anyway, this season is where Nya turns to form my female representation in the show, into just another whiney girl who "don't need no man" and wants to be completely independent of boys and romance and yet she wants to be like the boys by excelling at the same stuff they do. But then we get Pixal. She is FEMININE don't you doubt it for a single moment, she is a WOMAN and she wears dresses and falls in love with a handsome guy and she supports him. What's wrong with that? But in that, she still has her individual role to play in the team. She's sassy, and she's yet again another a tech genius, but it more comes from her nature as a robot, and what she can control because of it. The scene with her and Kai really exemplifies what I mean to say, she's still strong in her own ways. She keeps the boys in check, something extremely important, especially with THESE boys. She doesn't have to be destroying mass amounts of nindroids to be a good character, she just has to make the pathway in order to do it. She's the control behind the destruction.

But let's not forget that she's a robot. Practically just born. She's young and naive and she doesn't understand her emotions and I LOVE it! Her dynamic with Zane is simply beautiful. Zane has been looking for someone his whole life who understands him, and he gets his dad, but no one else in the world can experience what he is experiencing directly, and then comes Pixal. I think Zane sums it up really well in decoded (Ikr, decoded?) When he says she taught him what it meant to be a robot and he teaches her what it means to be human. There's a great duality there. He finds someone who understands him, but they both have their own issues they need individual help understanding. And of course, they would understand each other! She has half his heart! Which opens up a lot of cool dynamics. I kind of wish Zane and Pixal had a force connection sort of thing and they could feel each other's pain and sense their emotions and stuff.

Anyway, because Pixal goes through the process of understanding her emotions, it does make sense that in the end, her emotions would consume her. Zane gave her... in essence, life and so it makes sense that it would completely shatter her when he was gone. I think the reason I connect with them so much is because, again, I am the most basic of girls, so finding a nice caring, overprotective, but not in a pushy sort of way guy with some emotional issues for you to heal is the kind of life I fantasize for myself, and Zane and Pixal are the quintessential sweet couple that loves, and listens to each other. It's just... love. Even though the situation might be messy or complex, the love is always constant, just pure and absolute. I feel like of all the couples in the show, Pixal and Zane are the only ones who really NEED each other. Jay needs Nya no doubt, but I don't feel she really needs him. Kai and Skylor are their own mess. The garmawusako triangle doesn't even make sense. Cole needs cake, sure, but cake is inanimate and hence doesn't need him. Pixal and Zane lean on each other constantly, and if we don't see how that effects them season 9, I will be pissed.

Romance

I know I just talked about Pixane, but I'm going to keep talking. The beginnings of this relationship are really interesting, mainly because at first one of them doesn't have emotions... which I guess means Zane was in love with an inanimate object? Whatever. In the scene on the train, you really can tell that Zane is kind of confused, but he's trying his best to express his feelings. I also love that all the other ninja already know he's got a crush on her even though he hasn't spoken a word about it to them. He's gotten a pretty good grasp on his other emotions, but he has never once encountered anything romantic before, and I don't think Dr. Julien necessarily built him with falling in love in mind, so it makes sense that he would flounder a bit in his efforts, but because Pixal first experiences emotions with Zane, she doesn't care about any of that, so in the process they just end up being perfect. I love these two to death. I could go on, but I'm going to stop myself.

The Triangle

No. Nothing about this makes sense. The biggest problem I have with this whole thing is that Cole has like... zero reason to be interested in Nya. His reasoning for suddenly liking her, if you can even call it that, is that a robot told him he should, and even then I don't feel like he likes her, he just wants to annoy Jay. It's SO out of character and there's no thought behind it. I can buy Nya second-guessing her relationship with Jay, but Cole just going along with it without question? It's so strange. And there's no reason. The show even addresses that there's no reason for this. When Nya has to cut a blue or black wire, the arguments go

Jay: you're comfortable with blue

Cole: Black... is not blue...

What? What kind of rationale is that? And because of this, the Nya independence streak starts and it's the WORST this season. And Jay gets WAY whiney and childish because of all of this, so he turns into this strangely unlikable character, which again eventually gets better. I absolutely hate everything about this love triangle. It doesn't make sense, it feels insincere, and it makes the characters worse for it. Just for that Cole and Jay are my least favorite ninjas for the season. But even then, I have a hard time putting Cole there because he's so out of character, I don't think I can call what was on the screen Cole. I didn't like either of them this season, which is a real shame, because these two have a great dynamic later on.

Villians

Nindroid army. These guys are fun. They don't make much sense in their creation, but they are genuinely intimidating, the thing that comes to mind is when the nindroids are camouflaged, and it turns out they're surrounding the ninja, that was pretty cool, and kind of terrifying. Cryptor is, of course, a standout. You get the sense he enjoys everything he's doing, knows he's better than everyone else and embraces it. He has emotions, right? I mean, he certainly appears to have negative emotions. His voice certainly emotes. Mindroid is amazing, cute and threatening at the same time, neat little backstory, you can tell he's the smartest one in the bunch. These guys just come with a really cool feel to them. When Borg is taken over, and the factory is all dark and shadowy, and there's only red light, that stuff is cool.

The Overlord on the other hand... takes a big step backwards. You get the sense he's pretty weak, the fact that he uses a cane when he's finally physical doesn't help. He's just not nearly as intimidating as he used to be. When he reaches his "final form" and he's pretty much a giant spider, that's pretty cool, but he still looks pretty awkward. Could be better, but for what we got it served its purpose alright

Pythor was a good reveal. Pretty fun, I love how he and Cryptor play off of each other. Not much to say, because he hasn't changed much, but he's pretty cool this season. His voice makes my throat sad.

Wu? Kinda gimmicky. Not much to say, he's brainwashed and he looks kinda scary for a bit... okay. I mean I'm fine with it, nothing to get too excited over or anything.

Climax

So, spoiler alert, Zane dies. It's sad and emotional and the flashback music hits you hard, and the long quiet afterwards is great, idk why Kai is the one to speak at the funeral, but whatever, and then your heart breaks for Pixal, but then that resurrection music kicks in, and the visuals are amazing, and Zane is back! Perfect. Sad to think their moment gets cut off so quickly, but still, it's just perfect. All the right emotions. However... logically... it’s not exactly sound? There would have been a really easy way to fix this though, that way is to set this battle in the digiverse. It requires reworking some things, but Zane would be equipped to kill him in that realm, he could stay there while the others escaped the digiverse, and when he rebuilds himself, it makes sense, because he’s already within the digital realm, able to control whatever is in Borg tower through that connection. Idk, I think it would have sealed up a few plot holes, but this climax still stands up emotionally really well. 

Humor

Jay, our biggest source of comedy, is... preoccupied with something, so all of it slides downhill a bit. Not too many great moments this season. Everything just feels a bit more childish.

Favorite line of the season: honestly, I can't remember any one line that stands out. But, there is a visual gag I really like, where Zane uses super speed to enter in a bunch of codes to try and open a door on the nindroid's spaceship, and the code ends up being 1234. That was good.

Drama

Most of the little stuff, the suspense, and tension, the nindroids knocking on the door to Borg tower, that stuff all works really well. The triangle stuff, you know how I feel about that, the death stuff at the end is handled really well. You can generally, throughout the season feel the weight of what they're doing, and that every move they make really matters. It reminds me a lot of the dark island episodes. There's a lit of hanging on by a thread this season, which works really well. There's a good amount of mystery, and I love myself some mystery, it creates some good ATMOSPHERE. Most of the drama really works, except of course the obvious.

Spotlight Episode

So, this is hard. The obvious spotlight is the finale, but I already covered that. There isn't one particular episode that really stands out, there's no episode that did everything wrong, there's no episode that did everything right, there's just the season, so I want to do this piece on the space episode. Because... it gets weird. Like really weird and it could have gone all shades of wrong so easily, but I think they pulled it off.

The important thing they did was acknowledge how crazy it all was. They obeyed the general rules of space, there was some really good tension, and the stakes for everything felt extremely heightened when they were on top of the spaceship, and then... the ending. The ending hits you. They are full on stuck on this planet and there is no obvious way to get out of it. When Cole says the final line... OOOOFF. You feel it. Oh crap! The ninjas are stuck! I don't have all too much to say, I just wanted to acknowledge that this episode didn't turn out a total disaster. It was handled fairly well, and I'm glad it was :)

Misc

So, if Pixal doesn't have emotions before Zane gives her her heart, why would she go rush in to save Zane and be all like "who cares about probability!" That always confused me.

The way Edna says robot love is kinda creepy.

You think Nya ended up cutting the blue wire? Cuz she knew her future with Jay was inevitable? My theory when it came out was that she cut both.

So, all together, a decent season. Some really good stuff, and some really bad stuff. I like this season more than most I think. It had a big task to fulfill, and I think what we got was pretty decent. It had to bring back the series, introduce new characters, attempt to hand the spotlight over to Zane. I just think now that it's set up, we needed a full season with the characters already established where we can dive deeper into what makes these droids tick and what their creators have to go through. There's a lot of potential for another Zane season, or dare I suggest even a Pixal season. One of my personal faves, just cuz the good stuff is so good, though I do find myself skipping past some parts quite frequently.

Thanks for reading through! Next time we’ll be covering the season that spurred a million plot holes- But it’s somehow still my favorite. I think it’ll be a fun one!

Thanks a bunch!

-Maya (Parachutingkitten)

[sweet-xoxo-thatcares]

I wonder was he like that at home or if someone taught him it was ok to talk to other women like that. He even talked crap about his sister once on the bus, but I thought she wayyyy prettier than me to get picked on.

But she handled him. She punched him or threatened to punch him if he did it again.

I was shocked at how protective he was of her too but yet would talk about her being fat too.

She wasn't as big as me, just slightly chubby in my opinion. Darius made me feel like I was the biggest girl at school, when there was obviously bigger chicks than me. But I guess I stood out. He thought I was mixed too....but he was Filipino and black.

And I was just....well black....I didn't have curly hair like the actual mixed girls there. I never really knew my natural hair, never got the chance too cause mom always made me get a perm. Cause it looked presentable.

I didn't start taking charge for my own hair until I noticed my hair started to get shorter and shorter and I was actually moisturizing it and wrapping it up at night. It scared me that what no matter what I did, it kept getting trimmed short because I had dead ends and I always wanted my hair to grow down to my behind like Princess Jasmine. She was so pretty to me at the time. Her eyes, her face, and her long black hair was just swishing. Plus she could wear skinny clothes, unlike me.

This was how I used to think back as the sheltered, goody two shoes everyone thought I was, while Darius's only goal seemed to me was to make middle school miserable for me, just because a fat, lightskinned girl liked him, but she wasn't as prettier or talked like all the other black girls in school either.

Him and alot people said I just sounded white. Or "you talk white" as some people put it. I grew up in a catholic school, kindergarten to 2nd grade....of course imma sound like that in a mixed cultured school...we only had one or two girls who were actually full on black and talked hood.

I guess I grew up in the suburbs and stayed to myself alot. I didn't really get to go over to friends houses alot either. Just my cousins and that's it.

I was by myself but I had alot of cartoon characters, dolls and toys that I played with by myself. Even watched movies with my grandma and my dad sometimes if he wasn't too busy. We would play games on the playstation, he bought us a karaoke machine and we had fun.

He tried to teach me how to ride a bike, but I was just too scared of falling and worrying about cars and stuff. He told me just to pedal, and don't worry. But I fell so many times we just kept the training wheels. And I felt safe in my barbie helmet and knee pads.

I started dressing the Bratz dolls and stuff when my first friend that was girl actually stayed in the neighborhood with me and she didn't make me feel like a burden. Our moms and dads even got along with each other, and we just did whatever she wanted us to do..she had the whole Bratz collection, movies, dollhouses, toycars (which I lovedddd), the house was nice and we had sleepovers every Thursday..

.until she moved cause her dad was in the army. It was sad, because she was actually a funny, sweet, nice girl. Her mom drove a black Nissan Infiniti, I remember that distinctly because I never seen that many people with that car and she made sure we didn't touch her car while plating outside.

Jerica. J...I'll keep her last name private. I still remember. The only girl I ever knew in 4th grade (she went to a different school with uniforms) with a Verizon phone where her parents let her watch cartoons on there. She loved Blu and Cheese from House of Imaginary Friends. She seemed sad if I wasn't able to come over on such a short notice.

She did something weird to the Bratz dolls tho....

I noticed she took off their clothes and made me hold one while she popped them together, like humping it, as if she knew what sex was like or just wondered about it. She had her own bathroom too. I think she was used to being by herself, and only let me in because I was nice to her and did what she liked or wanted to. I really wasn't against us being friends, her parents got along with mine, so I was cool.

Her dad even invited them to a family barbecue for her birthday and mom helped me pick out a new Bratz doll for her to have. She liked Yasmin the most. I did too. Sasha was 2nd, cause she was black and Jade, because she had eyes like me. I didn't like how most people praised Chloe more. I didn't think that back then about why they even made Bratz 4 different demographics. It just clicked at my school, that was how it was for me....except there was no real Puerto Rican, Mexican, Filipino, Italian, or Haitian involved in doll making back then.

I just thought all of them looked cute. Mom always bought me Sasha, so I didn't complain. That sounds bad....dang ky, why you had to put Sasha 2nd or 3rd....

I just wanted to be different so I didn't feel weird about buying a doll that's not my color. My parents judged me on that type of stuff. Like especially when I got into kpop or Asian culture. I like learning about different cultures that feel new to me because I've never been there and I never lived it.

But anyway, Jerica ended up writing me a letter to see how was I....I never got the chance to write her back because I had lost the envelope she sent with her address. It's been along time and I doubt she would remember me after moving so many times.

I just remembered I also met another girl named Lyric that had to move to Cuba because of her dad in the military too. She the only other neighborhood girl I rode the 2nd bus home with. But we weren't close.

I don't think she wanted to hang out like that, so I never asked. This was around the time I noticed certain people would talk to me at school, but never did anything or ask to hang out with me outside of school. So I sorta kept us at Associate level (talk in passing, not personal or deep stuff about families)

Same with Darius. He wasn't even a friend to me. He only asked me about test grades and who could get the better score on a math test. Or just talked shit. I never opened up to people I can't trust. We used to talk about our interests or what movie, TV show,, or video game we saw or both liked. Music too. I Bluetoothed him some R&B songs to his phone since he heard me play MaryMary and Robin Thicke. He liked some gospel songs since his mom played them at the house. He just didn't like to dance, cause he would get shy and not know how to move or even basic two step. Me I loved to dance, until I noticed it wasn't ok for a big girl to move like that because she was fat. It hurt hearing that, so I stopped dancing too. Unless I was home alone with my mp3 or what felt like home alone in my room or in my head.

So yea, Darius, he never got to know me. But I think I did from overhearing him talk out loud, and sneaky shit people would say he said about me. I believed it because lets just be frank, he always had something to say about me. But I did not talk to him or confront him about because I didn't want to get in trouble at school for fighting.

So I would just sneak jabs in, kick him at the bus stop cause we weren't at school yet, and either chase him away for talking about my fat. He seemed like he liked me chasing him until he got bored and told me to stop if I went too far.

He only saved my ass once from getting in trouble about the school teacher catching us upstairs in the computer lab without permission, but he lied and told her anyway that the actual computer teacher did give him and us permission to finish the assignment she gave us upstairs. He lied a pretty darn good one off the top of his head, while I was just stressed and said "uhhhhh?" In blank stare mode. I didn't know what to say.

Whenever I get in trouble like that or just freeze, I freeze. My whole body shutdowns and depending on what is said I either cry or walk away, taking my punishment and just leave.

I think Darius probably lied to his parents before, so I thought he was just cool for that. He said I owed him one after that.

I just didn't get it when nobody else was around, he had my back, but everywhere else he was jerk, a fake.

It felt like he had cheated me, at such a young age, who rarely had crushes on boys and focused mainly on just school work, I kept my mouth shut around certain people....especially if I knew they had a big mouth...i didn't tell them anything unless I wanted it to be told to them.

And that's when somebody took the heart I drew of Darius (with muscles cause I always wanted him to look less bony) out of my hands and he showed it to him....cause he knew I didn't want him to see it.

Darius took it, looked at it for a little while as he paced back and forth, came back to where I sat criss crossed applesauced, and crumbled it up. And threw it to my face in front of the whole gym class.

It was embarrassing, but hey, he didn't like me, so he started to get upset if people assumed the reason why he made fun of me so much was because he liked me. That's when he took a break from it, once the rumors died down.

It was a big school and even said to somebody, I overheard him say "oh, she would be cuter if she just lost weight."

What a jerk. I hated him.

Then if he was nice to me, I like him.

It was too complex, my standard of emotions for another guy. Anxious attachment and fear of rejection and abandonment. My worst fear. To be laughed at by a whole group of people you didn't know, but they knew something about you, because of this little punk...I hated him for it.

He asked me what shoe size I was: 11

And everyone else laughed about him cause he was making fun of my big feet. They thought it wasn't normal for girls to have big shoes and big feet. Him and his ignorant ass friends were the type to make fun of a woman for wearing boy shoes and not girly shoes. Like girls should be girls and dress like girls. Boys should be boys who dressed like boys.

The girls there called me tomboy even if I was to wear a big shirt and shorts. Like obviously I'm hiding my boobs and "manly legs" was the most unique comment I ever heard that I hated.

Like yup, I guess I was made fun of for looking too strong and having muscular, big legs compared to the bony ass boys at school. I was never challenged to a fair fight, so I guess she must've been scared to find out.

[just-jordie-things]

Flirt - Theo Raeken

warnings: swearing, mentions of sexual activities, lotso alcohol so underaged drinking, very belated request word count: 4535 (THATS WHAT IM TALKIN ABOUT I WROTE IT IN 1 DAY) requested by anon! again sorry the request took me forever to get to ya, but i didn’t forget! although I did change some things around... hope you still like it tho

“Kiss me if I’m wrong, but dinosaurs still exist right?”

 You turned from where you stood on the steps of the school, and rose an eyebrow at Theo Raeken.  He winked, bounding up the stairs towards you.  “And how are you this mornings, darling flower?” You rolled your eyes, but let him walk next to you anyways.

 “I am absolutely wonderful now that I have Mr Raeken escorting me into the building.  And you?”

 “Well I do find myself fancying walking with you, flower” He replied.  You laughed to yourself as you headed into the school.

 “Nice chatting as always Raeken.  See you later”

 “Adios Chica”

 He watched you walk off to your locker, and he paused in the hall.  You met up with your friend, Kira, as you always did.  Theo let out a sigh.  Sure, he flirted around, it was like his trademark.  But he didn’t flirt to anyone the way he flirted with you.  He pursued you.  You… the girl unaware of what his past truly was.  Sure, he’d been told by Scott that you knew about the more… supernatural side of Beacon Hills.  Basically that you knew about the McCall pack, but wasn’t involved.  He persisted on knowing more about you, but Scott only cared to share your knowledge on the werewolves banshees and kitsunes.

 But he was aware that you had no clue of his own involvement, including his chimera status.

 You were at your locker with Kira, the girl pushing you into answering her daily questions about your encounters with Theo.

 “Did he use a pickup line? He always does, what’d he say today? Was it cute? Do you think you like him?”

 “Hey hey hey” You said with a chuckle.  “Kye, I love you, but this is getting out of hand.  Theo’s… popular.  You think he’s gonna go for some random girl like me? No.  He’s not” Kira made a pout.

 “I don’t know girly… he seems like he’s really into you” You crinkled your nose and shook your head.

 “No… no I doubt he’s like that”

“Doubt who’s like what?” Lydia asked, having popped out of nowhere.  Already using the mirror on your locker door to fix up her lip gloss.

 “y/n don’t think that Theo likes her” Kira said.  Lydia rolled her eyes.

 “Oh please, I haven’t ever seen a boy salivate that much.  And I’ve taken Stiles to get curly fries” She said with a short laugh.  “Seriously, just go for it.  What’ve you got to lose?”

 “My dignity?” You said sarcastically.  Kira rolled her eyes with Lydia this time.

 “You’re not even gonna take a real chance?” She asked.  You pursed your lips.

 “Maybe if Lyds gets me tipsy enough at her next party” You said.  Your friends sighed.

 “Come on y/n, that’s totally not fair” Kira said in a defeated tone.  “You flirt with hi,, and he flirts back.  You’re both into each other, why not just… you know” Kira began wildly clapping her hands.  Lydia’s brows furrowed.

 “Hatefuck each other?” The banshee guessed.  You slapped a hand over your mouth to stifle your laughter.

 “What!?” Kira asked with wide eyes.  Oh the innocence of this fox would never not be funny to you.  “No- no! I meant- I meant get together!” Kira began to clap again, this time sending you and Lydia into pity giggles and head shakes.

 “No sweetie… no that’s not what that means.  Like at all” Lydia said, wrapping an arm around the kitsune’s shoulders as the three of you began to walk to class.

“Oh my God…. I do that when I’m talking to people all the time…” Kira mumbled, making you both laugh again as you went into class. 

You ended up unable to focus during the entire class.  You were too busy wondering about what the girls had told you about Theo.  Sure, you were kinda interested.  A cute boy who flirts with you? Who wouldn’t be interested.  But you were certain that his intentions weren’t to have a romantic evening at dinner and a movie.  No, Theo Raeken seemed more like a one night stand kind of guy.  

Theo sighed as he sat down at his picnic table outside for lunch.  Yeah, for a ‘popular’ and big flirt, he ate lunch alone.  After his encounters with the McCall pack, Stiles had a thing for glaring him down in the cafeteria.  Or the hallways.  Or class.  And once he accidentally walked into the bathroom while Stiles was already there.  Usually he didn’t mind the alone time, in fact he quite enjoyed it.  He was able to get back into the swing of things.  Focus on classes, raising grades.  As well as keeping his cool and forgetting about the past.

 But he knew you were in the lunchroom.  Laughing and smiling with your friends… who happened to be the McCall pack but Theo would risk getting the evil eye from Stiles to listen in on your giggling.  But then he’d also have to go through the hassle of finding a table and alas, he had no friends.  Hayden was the closest thing to a friend he had… but last he heard she was part of Scott’s pack now and likely wanted nothing to do with him.

 You wandered outside, needing a break from your group of friends.  Well, needing a break from Stiles and Lydia’s clinginess, from Kira’s continued questions, Scott’s check up on your grades, Malia’s… well Malia didn’t do anything you loved Malia, but you needed a break from everyone really.  No one was out there, a nice empty space of picnic tables.  You took in a deep breath and looked over the area…. Your eyes landed on Theo.  Your brows furrowed at the sight.  Theo Raeken ate lunch alone?

 “Hey Raeken” You called, walking down the steps and into the courtyard.  He looked up from a book.  A book.  You never pegged him for a reading guy. 

“Hey l/n” He replied.  You stood in front of his table, next to the bench across from him.  “Well sit down if you like, but if you’re ditching this early I’d get your ass moving” He said with a light hearted chuckle.  You shook your head and sat across from him, setting your bag next to you.

“I don’t ditch.  I don’t want to get in trouble” Theo laughed.  “What? Is there something funny about my wanting to have a good education?” You asked.  You shook his head, pursing his lips and putting his hands up in surrender.

“Oh no, I just don’t expect any less from you lovely y/n” He said.  You raised an eyebrow.

“And what does that mean?” You asked, folding your hands together and setting them on a table.

“It means, toots” He started.  “You wouldn’t ditch, if I gave you all the money in my wallet, right now” You thought about it for a moment.

“Hm” He rolled his eyes.

“Are you seriously contemplating it? Please, I see you getting the bite from Scott before leaving school grounds before the final bell has rung”

You sat in silence for a full minute before Theo realized his mistake.

His eyes widened and jaw slacked, unsure of how to cover for such a colossal screw up.

Before he could even come up with something to say, you were already responding.

“Well at least Scott’s an alpha.  I don’t suppose I’d like to be a part of your sorry ass ‘half animal’ chimera pack” You said with a scoff and a smirk.  Again, leaving him with wide eyes and a hung open mouth.  “Shut the trap dear, you’ll catch flies” You winked, and slung your bag over your shoulder.

“You.. you knew?”

“I gotta go hun” You said, standing from your seat and making your way towards the school again.  “Don’t wanna be late for class” Theo shook his head, left a stunned mute in his lonesome.

 The next morning you were getting out of Stiles’ jeep, and tiredly walking yourself up the steps of the school.  Nothing had happened to make you this tired, it was just one of those mornings.  The kind where you were jeans converse and a sweatshirt, a messy bun on your head and a coffee in your hand.  Well, Stiles did spend the whole drive to the school telling you terrible things about Theo, so that wore you out.  At least all his arguments were things you already knew.  

‘I mean, look at the gel in his hair’

‘He flirts around a lot’

‘He eats lunch all by himself’

‘There’s a reason he’s got no friends’

To be honest, everything he used just made you feel bad for Theo.  He really didn’t have friends… at least not ones you ever saw him hang out with.  You frowned at the thought, and looked to Stiles as you walked towards the school together.

“Did he have friends ever? Like in elementary school or anything?” You asked.  Having been new to Beacon Hills in the eighth grade, you hadn’t known Theo until he had supposedly moved back in the beginning of your senior year.

“Yeah.  Me and Scott” Stiles said, tugging on the strings of his jacket.

“Scott and I” You corrected with a mumble.  But didn’t push the subject any more.  He’d only argue against you.  If you even breathed Theo’s name, you were sure Stiles would pop up with five more text based facts about why you should steer clear of him.  Most of them relating back to ‘because he’s evil’.

Was he? Would you even know? All that Kira had oh so secretly filled you in on was that Theo was a chimera, and for a short while he had a pack of chimeras that consisted of Tracy, Josh, Hayden and Corey.  Hayden and Corey being the only friends you had to talk to about whether or not Theo was a villain.

Josh and Tracy had mysteriously disappeared a few months back… maybe you should be doing some more investigating.

“Kira!” You called, ditching Stiles and rushing over to your petite asian friend.

“Kay bye” Stiles muttered, trying to hide his embarrassment of you leaving him alone by searching for Scott or Lydia.

“Hi” Kira said with a chipper tone but a confused look.  “What…? Did you forget to do the Econ homework cause I did too and I was gonna ask Lydia for help on it-”

“Tell me about Theo” You said bluntly.  Her eyes widened to a round almond shape.

“Um-”

“Tell me Kira, I need to know”

Meanwhile across the hall, Theo perked up at the sound of his name being spoken in a recognizably soft tone.  He looked over from where he was putting his coat in his locker, to where you stood just down the hall with Kira.  Just far enough that he could listen in without getting caught.  His ear perked as he stuffed his bag with books to look busy.

“... I mean Scott wasn’t dead dead, well, he was, but only for a few minutes!” Kira said quickly.  Theo could hear the quickening in your heartbeat.

You were scared.

He shook his head, furrowing his brows as he continued to listen to the conversation against his better judgement.

“He… he k- he killed Scott?” You stuttered over your words, speaking quietly.  Theo looked down the hall now, meeting Kira’s eyes.  Your back was turned to him.

“Yes” She answered, maintaining eye contact with him.

He wanted to glare, he wanted to slam his locker, maybe storm down there and deliver a nice ‘fuck you’ to the thunder kitsune.

But he couldn’t.  He could only stare longingly at the back of your head.  Kira looked at him again, giving a slight frown.  He wondered if she meant it as an apology, or just for pity.  The bell rang, and he heard you and Kira exchange goodbyes.

When you turned around, you began walking down the hallway quickly.  He could see you tightly clutching a binder to your chest.  He turned slightly, making himself more visible to you, and he contemplated saying something, but he didn’t know how, or what to even say 

You saw him before he could finish his thought.  Your eyes widened, and you stepped further away from him, walking closer to the opposite wall of lockers.

“y/n-”

“Don’t” You said in the most serious tone you could muster.  “Don’t talk to me”

 He opened his mouth, but closed it instantly.  He could see the tears in your eyes, and didn’t want to push you anymore than he already had.

“You- how- how dare you” You said with a snarl.  “How dare you”

I’m sorry, he wanted to say.  I’m sorry for everything, I should’ve told you, I should’ve been honest about everything.

“You, Theo Raeken” You looked away for a moment, then shook your head as you stared back at him.  “You’re a terrible person” You told him, voice cracking.  You opened your lips to say something else, but couldn’t bring yourself to do it.  So you settled for shaking your head again.   

You walked off, and Theo was left in an empty hallway. 

“What an asshole! What a total dickwad!” You exclaimed, swigging back a drink of your beer as you sat on Lydia’s sofa.  She sighed, looking over at Kira and Malia, who were curled up on the recliner.  Malia had fallen asleep within the first two hours of the girls night sleepover.

“Look, y/n can I tell you something? Like, some real and solid advice?” You shrugged and nodded, taking a few more drinks.  “I think… I think he’s better now.  Since he’s come back”

“What!?” You exclaimed, and Kira shot you a look, gesturing to her sleeping girlfriend.  “Sorry I just- Lyd” You said her name in a breathy laugh.  “He, he killed Scott, Kira told me everything he did, he hit you too and nearly killed you in EIchen how can-”

“Yes, he did horrid, and awful things” Lydia said.  “But he was literally dragged down, to the pits of hell, for months… I think he’s learned a lesson or two”

 You let this sink in whilst chugging down the rest of your beer.

“Anyways, I invited him to my party tomorrow night.  Well, I invited everyone, but still, he said he’d be there so” Lydia shrugged, pretending to care about her fingernails but she was watching you out of the corner of her eye.  “Maybe you can talk to him, or something”

Maybe you could.

 Theo closed the front door behind him, almost being shoved against it by the mass amount of dancing bodies in Lydia Martin’s living room.  He swiftly moved past them and made his way to the kitchen.  Then double checked his phone.

Lydia Martin: come to the kitchen when you get here Lydia Martin: i’ll put wolfsbane in your drink.  You’ll need it

He ended up pushing a few people aside and promptly apologizing.  When he reached the Martin kitchen, he saw Lydia there, pouring and mixing drinks, handing out beer bottles and red solo cups.  At the dining table some girl was dancing on it and a ring of guys took shots of toxic liquid god knows what 

“Ah Mr Raeken!” Lydia grinned, waving him over.  “Hey, Mal take my spot” She said, Malia instantly trading places with her.  Lydia grabbed two plastic cups and met Theo at the kitchen entrance.  “Come with me” She told him, and he blindly followed her to the backyard.  He was surprised no one was back here.

“Are you gonna kill me-”

“Nope” Lydia handed up one of the cups, and when he took it she drank from hers.

“Okay… and why’d you want me to come tonight? I mean thanks but-”

“Cut the bullshit you only came cause you knew y/n would be here” Theo snapped his mouth shut and Lydia giggled.  “I knew it! Cute” She took another drink, slightly swaying to the loud music inside, muffled out here.

“Yeah.. yeah I did but she doesn’t want to talk to me anyways so..” Theo shrugged, taking a whiff of his drink.  When he smelled the wolfsbane he took a small sip, and was surprised by the old yet familiar sensation of liquor running down his throat.

“Anywho.  She’s dancing with Kira.  You should go ask to talk to her” Theo snorted at that.

“Yeah, thanks sweets, but she’d rather shove a stick up my ass first” Lydia crinkled her nose and cringed at the image in her head, but shook her head to get rid of it.

“Okay… but you’re wrong” Lydia said, using her ‘Sweetie I’m smarter than you so I know what I’m talking about’ voice.

“I’m wrong?” Theo asked, drinking more of whatever it was Lydia had made for him.

“Yeah.  You are.  You don’t think that I explained to her the whole story?” Lydia asked, her tone becoming softer.  Theo looked at her, then looked down at the cup in his hands.  “Because I did” She said, maneuvering her head so their eyes would meet, hoping he’d see her sincerity.  “Listen to my heartbeat am I lying? y/n likes you, and I can see it, and I know it, you think I’d let her just be pissed at you over something she didn’t yet understand-”

“Okay but why do you care? Why are you helping me? Won’t your boyfriend be mad?” Theo asked.  Lydia smiled, and shook her head 

“I’m not here for Stiles.  I’m here for y/n” She said kindly.  “Just go find her” She added, then headed inside.

Theo thought about just standing in the backyard, drinking his liquor and contemplating the strange shit that was his life.  But after a second he knew he couldn’t be this close without trying to talk to you.

He went back inside, and pushed his way through the crowd in the living room.

When he saw you, dancing too cutely for your outfit of choice, his heart melted.

You were wearing a black cocktail dress that fell to your upper thigh, enough that when you jumped as you danced, he could just barely see the smooth curve of your ass.  You spun around, revealing a beer bottle in one hand, the other happily raised as you danced to the EDM music playing.  You were laughing and smiling, eyes closed in euphoria, and if Theo had his scents right, drunkenness.  He frowned slightly, instantly worried for your own well being.

Your eyes fluttered open, instantly landing on him.  The only non moving thing in the crowd, about four feet away.  He was surprised when you didn’t scowl, or frown.  The smallest of smiles still stayed present on your lips.  After a moment, you lowered your arms and looked down at your feet, silently giving yourself reassurance.

Then you walked up to him, somehow managing to balance in your high heels.  He watched you, pretty much ready to hold his arms out to catch you if you were to fall.

“Hey” You managed quietly.  Theo looked dramatically to the left, then the right, before pointing to himself

“Me?” You nodded.  “You’re talking to me?” You giggled this time, nodding, and holding your bottle to your chest.

“Yes, I’m talking to you Theo” You said.  He smiled at you and bowed his head slightly.

“Well then the pleasure is all mine” You laughed again, and nodded your head off to the side 

“You want to go outside?” You asked him, and he nodded.

“Sure” WIth that he followed behind you to the back door, just like he had for Lydia.  When he passed her and Malia in the kitchen handing out drinks like before, the strawberry blonde gave him a hidden thumbs up.  Though he didn’t know if she meant it for him or you.  He opened the door and held it as you walked out, giving him another small smile in thanks.  He closed it when you stepped outside.

He admired you for a moment as you stared up at the inky blue night sky, counting the stars in your head, as many as you could.  After a while he knew he had to say something.

“Look, I figure you wanna talk about the other day, so um, if you have any questions I don’t mind-” You turned around, your beautiful eyes meeting his and Theo found himself trailing off.

“What?” You asked, your innocent voice quiet and soft.  You set your bottle down on the concrete patio with a little clink.  “Why’d you stop?” You asked, walking back to him.

“Sorry I just..” He stopped again, and you raised your eyebrows in impatience.  “I don’t know.  Waiting for you to ask questions I guess” You nodded, pursing your lips as you thought.

“Are you evil?” He snorted a laugh.

“I’d like to think not, but don’t ask Stiles that” he said, making you chuckle as well.  “Is that all you got? Not exactly what I was expecting”

 “Did… did you kill Tracy and Josh?” You asked.  His mouth opened, then closed.  Then opened again…. Then closed again.  You got your answer that way.  “Why?”

 “I can’t… I can’t answer that in a way that will ever make sense to you” He said honestly.  “Or me, quite frankly” You nodded, looking down at the ground and rubbing your shoe on the concrete.  “Look, I did a lot of terrible things, but I want- I need you to know that i regret every moment of it, every single one of them.  And if I could take it back I would in an instant” You looked up, eyes meeting his again.

 “I’ll take your word for it” You said softly.  He half smiled at you.

 “Any other questions?” You thought for a few seconds, taking off your shoes in the meantime and wandering into the grass in your bare and aching feet.

 “Come up with me” You said, pointing off to a tree.  Theo looked up, seeing a tree house in it.

“I never thought Lydia would be a treehouse building kind of girl” Theo chuckled, and you did too, shaking your head.

“No, it’s old.  She’s had it here longer than I’ve been around” You told him, climbing up the trunk to where the ladder was.

“How long have you been around? Did you go to Beacon Hills Elementary? Cause I think I would’ve remembered you” You were thankful he was on the ladder below you, so he wouldn’t see your blush.

“No, I didn’t move here till the middle of eighth grade” You told him, climbing into the box that was once a prized treehouse.  Theo crawled in shortly after you.  “But I didn’t meet Scott and Stiles and Allison till freshmen year, I was friends with just Lydia till then” You said.

“Allison?” You looked over at him, your features falling.

“Yeah.. yeah we uh… we lost her” You said solemnly.  Theo nodded, barely recognizing the name from something Scott had briefly mentioned a while back.  “But she’s in a much better place now, so” You nodded off, looking desperately for a conversation changer.

“So what’s your college future look like?” Theo asked.  You raised an eyebrow, sitting on the planked floor against the wall.

“My college future?” You repeated, and he nodded.

“You get questions, I get questions.  It’s the game” You nodded, smiling at the idea of the game.

“Alright, I’ll play.  I applied for a few places, but I really just want to get into NYC” You said.

“Why so far?”

“Nope, my turn for a question” You said.  “Why’d you come to Lydia’s party?”

“Hoping to find you miss y/n” He stated unashamedly.  “Why do you want to go to NYC?”

“Because it’s far and I want to explore on my own.  Gain a sense of freedom and independence you know?” Theo smiled at that, and nodded.  “Mr Raeken” You began in a deep formal voice, and making him laugh.  “Do you have the hots for moi?” He chuckled at the question.

“I do believe so, miss y/n” He said, shuffling over closer next to you.  For a moment you thought he was going to lean over and kiss you, maybe wrap an arm around you, but he did neither.  “And do you for me?” You looked over and smiled at him, fully aware of the mere two inches between your lips and his.  You nodded your head just barely.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were a chimera to begin with?” You asked quietly.

“I didn’t want to scare you off so soon” He replied in the same volume.  You watched his eyes flicker down to your lips for a moment, then back to your own.  “Did you hate me when Kira told you… things?” He asked.  You shook your head, choosing to keep silent in this answer.  He watched you inch closer just a little 

“Do you want to kiss me?” You murmured.  Theo rose a hand, his fingertips dusting lightly over your cheek before cupping it.

“Yes” He said, your eyes trained on his lips as he spoke the single word.

“Then do it”

It only took him half a second before his lips slanted against yours, making you see stars behind your closed eyes.  Your hands slid up behind his neck, into his hair and resting in the soft locks.  You hummed in pleasure, scooting forward and moving your lips in sync with his.  You felt him smile against you, and you parted briefly.

“Wow” You whispered, eyes still shut and nose bumping his.  Theo chuckled, opening his eyes to find yours still closed.

“How would you feel on going out tomorrow night with the bad guy?” He asked you, and you opened your eyes, pressing your cheek against his warm palm.

“I would love to go out tomorrow night with a… a good guy in training” You said with a bright smile and small giggle.  With that answer he leaned back in and kissed you shortly, to which you pulled him right back in for a satisfyingly longer kiss.

“I like the sound of that better” Theo said, and you smiled again.

“Me too” You said, hands resting on his shoulders.  You stared at him for a moment, then moved closer on your knees, and straddled over his lap.  

Theo watched your actions, his arms falling from holding your face gently.  You both looked down as you sat yourself on his thighs, then met eyes again.  You smiled shyly, and leaned down to press your lips to his again.  His hands rested on your hips, then encircled around your waist to embrace you against him.  Your lips moved together in a soft dance.  He did even try to stick his tongue down your throat, showing you nothing but affection and gentleness.  You smiled against his lips, giving him one last, longing kiss.  You both parted slowly.

“I would like to fall in love with you” He told you, making you laugh softly and shake your head.  He brushed back the fallen strands of hair.

“I’d like to fall in love with you as well, Mr Raeken” You responded.

And you very well did.

hope it was everything you dreamed Xx

xoxo ~ jordie

PS: DONT FORGET TO VOTE UR FAV TW GIRL + GUY IN MY ASKS!! XX

[lunalullylove-blog]

Life begins except for everyone else I've been alive for 30 years.

I wish I could go back in time. To my teenage years, when my mom and dad were getting divorced and I could tell my teenager self that "it is okay to want to be a girl in fact you are a girl, it is okay to let her out now".

Well that teenage girl was trapped, she wanted out but the only ways I would allow her to be outside was when I played games online back when that meant Ragnarok Online or WoW.

Being a girl online felt right to 15 year old me. I loved when people treated me like a girl. I would never pretend to be a girl, I would just act naturally and it was always the case. Obviously things started to get bad psychologically speaking.

I would go to school and be bullied for having girly preferences. I stopped wanting to go to school, fortunately I met a couple of people along the way that allowed me to get through it all, but just barely.

The routine was pretty much set in stone for my brain. Go out, do whatever, come back as fast as I could, log in. That's when anime and Forums became more popular. YouTube was still very recent too. Not too popular here in Brazil still.

I've met a lot of people that would accept me the way I was. A young naive girl stuck in a boy's body, trying to ignore that fact. Around the 2006s there was no positive talk about trans people. We were either crazy or perverted men prostitutes.

Even the internet wasn't as mature back then.

Well my mom married a second time to her childhood friend and my dad just left the picture entirely.

That's when the shit got really bad. I had no permission to be myself in the house. Not because of my mom, but my stepfather. He was someone I didn't know. Someone I wasn't fully comfortable around. Plus he hates Japanese pop culture and was a homophobe.

I know, it sounds like a horror story. Well, that's because it was. I was pressured to find a job, to study and join a college. I had to pay for the college however. With 19 I tried to suicide the first time. I was a mess.

My mom asked my uncle if he could give me a job, so I took it. "It's the best for me" I would chant to myself as I boarded the packed bus for my daily an hour and a half commute.

There the work was maintenance assistant so I pretty much did everything they asked me. Of course being an uninformed person, my superior would make fun of me for being girly. I had to endure it for 2 years. I snapped one day and went home crying. I had no idea exactly why, my brain was in a state of turmoil. Nothing made sense. I had to try to fit in - I was told by my parents. College wasn't different. I gave up and made depts.

I had some relationships that ended in disaster because I was always sad, I barely spoke a word, I was extremely emotionally dependent. That was around 2010.

I became a robot. I parrot of society. I couldn't tell at the time but I was basically trying so hard to live a life as someone I wasn't that to this day I still have blanks.

I closed myself to my feelings and the girl was buried alive under those feelings of hopelessness and fear. She began to fade from my memory alongside my memories of me playing house with my cousin, or me being the girl in every other situation I had the chance when I was a child.

...

It's 2015, I'm 26 years of age working at a game publisher (I know right?? ♡). Still something was wrong. I lost interest in waking up early after 3 years working there. I'm fired. At the same time my girlfriend breaks up with me.

I am now leaving in a cubicle, with no way to pay the expensive rent. I have no one to support me emotionally. I'm lost.

I hang myself with a belt. Fortunately the belt buckle broke and I was tossed back onto the horrible bed.

I had to tell my mom that I had lost the job again. She took me in once again. But this time I was broken. My stepfather at this point is stuck to a wheelchair due to his multiple sclerosis. My mom has to work and take care of him. Having me home was bad and I knew it would be really bad.

At first she supported my therapist and psychiatrist. I started taking meds to treat my now diagnosed ADHD. It got better, I was developing more sense of self, the decluttering of my brain was progressing. I could see it but there was something missing.

3 years living with my mom, unemployed, depressed and needing expensive medication. That's when I saw her hand again. Her beautiful hand sticking out of my brain clutter. With my therapist, we got her back on her feet, shook off all that dirt and I was complete. I found myself within.

I wish that was all, the big quest began because although my mom was supportive at first, her husband and her are now pressuring me to go out, to work in anything to afford the HRT. I'm still depressed however. I fear leaving my room, I hate my image in the mirror. All the body hair. I'm someone I don't recognize.

It honestly feels like waking up. It feels like a time travel. One day I was a cute little girl dressing up and having fun, the next there's some guy looking back at me in the mirror.

I recognize those eyes, lips, nose... But it's all wrong. Where are my breasts? When did this became big? Why do I have the sexual desire of a guy???

I can't go out like this. I don't have a single girl's clothes in my wardrobe.

I wish mom would understand that HRT is the treatment. At least to aliviate my dysphoria. I can't go to find work looking like this. I can't.

I'm stuck now. Hearing my mother tell me she had enough of me being home doing whatever on my PC. She wants me to find a job. But I can't go out without feeling like I'll suffocate in anxiety.

Brazil is a funny country. It's beautiful. Progressive in some areas but absurdly regressive in others. To top things off with a cute little bow... even though I'm told by my mother that I'm not looking for work, I actually am. Just so I can afford my undies and makeup not to mention the HRT.

In Brazil, the worker's laws are very punitive towards the employer. Which leads to most establishments to hire one person to perform multiple functions.

The paycheck isn't big either. If you convert to US dollars, minimum wage as of the writing of this post is around $350 a month.

It would probably be fine still. I would probably struggle to work an entire month to get that much but at least I would be able to pay to start the HRT which in turn would increase my selfesteeme to keep working.

One day maybe even move over to the US. Which was another recovered dream of mine.

Anyways... this is really long. I thought I wouldn't be able to write about this... It's probably hard to read since most of my memories are still a mess.

With love.

Luna Duarte

Ps: This is face app. I look like a zombie irl.

[tobyjamessharp]

I just recently had a friend come out as trans, and I myself am gay, so LGBT rights are very important to me, but it's been kind of, idk, hard, seeing them as a different person. I've known them for so long, and it's hard to see them as a different gender. I keep slipping and calling them by their birth name, and I feel so bad, but they are very understanding and I support them so much like it's not even funny. I know as they continue their transition it'll get easier (pt 1)

I’m gonna readmore my response cause I might ramble a bit!!

First off, let your friend know I’m really proud of them forcoming out! As you know as well, it’s a terrifying experience so getting thatout in the open is a big step that took a lot of courage.

And as far as struggling to see them as another person? Youreally don’t have to if that makes any sense? Your friend is still the sameperson they always have been, in or out of the closet. Now they just get tostart being vocal about something they’ve known for probably a very long time.

Journey of me coming to the realization I was trans was a prettybumpy one tbh. Growing up as a little kid I think I always knew? But my parentsnever pressured me into anything too “girly” and I didn’t really even know whatbeing transgender was so I didn’t talk too much about it. Apparently when I waslittle I got mad at my mom because I had told her I wanted a penis and she waslike “well bud you’re never gonna be able to grow one” like not being mean JUSTBEING FACTUAL RIGHT. AND BABY TOBY GOT REALLY MAD AT MY OWN BODY BECAUSE “WHYCAN’T I GROW ONE”  So in hindsight myparents were like “yeah there were signs as a child” but yeah.

Shit rly started getting not fun around 13-14? So awkwardtween teen time it sucked I hated it. And it was the stupidest way this thoughteven popped into my mind but it’s how it happened and like. You know thosemoments you can remember soooo clearly?? This is one of them like I could walkyou to the exact fucking spot this happened and be like here it is. I was inforever 21 with my siblings and like I hated every piece of clothing supposedlymeant for me and I remember looking over and the mens section and being like. Enviousof all the guys and thinking wow I would look and feel so much more comfortableIf I could dress like them. And then suddenly that thought hit me of “well areyou a boy?”  

And I was like fuck idk. I had never really consciously identifiedwith girls so I was just kinda floating. I kinda brushed that thought off andwas like meh that was just a random thought I probably will never question likethat again.

Let’s fast forward literally 4 years and not a day went bywhere I didn’t spend every waking moment stressing over that question. I wasafraid to say anything to my parents initially cause I thought they’d justbrush me off, but once I had  beenthinking about it for 4 years I figured there had to be some grain of truth tothis question that literally kept me up at night and sobbing in my room cause Ididn’t know. I talked to my parents and initially told them I thought I wasmaybe genderfluid because I was honestly terrified to fully admit I was transgenderbecause from everything I saw in mainstream media and news it was all justabout suffering and sadness and blah blah blah. I thought after “coming out” asnonbinary would make me feel better but my family still called me she/her andno one outside my family knew because I was playing college soccer on the womensteam at my school and I didn’t even want to cross that bridge. Again, thoughtit would get better, but depression was still horrible and I would literallysob in my dorm room nearly every night because I didn’t know what to do. So itwas my 18th bday when I came out as nonbinary to my parents, and itwas my 19th birthday when I had finally admitted to myself and myparents I was transgender and a male. The plan from there was to get me intothe therapy for gender dysphoria and depression because I needed it and I was afucking tERROR to be around because I was mad and depressed and taking it outon people and yiKES. But then also to go back to school and just play pretendagain for a year, finish my sophomore year of college soccer and then leave theteam after season, finish spring semester, and then take a year off totransition. Even with having to go back and pretend again, I felt better withtherapy and with having come out as a male to my family. Obvs rn I’m in theyear off stage of that plan and hopefully will be returning to a college campussoon :0

Transition wise I’ve been on HRT for a while now. I think Ijust passed 7 months earlier this week so that’s great. The HRT I use is acompound cream which works surprisingly well lmao.  I apply it twice a day and it’s really nicecause I don’t have to deal with the big mood swings and highs and lows thatusually come from weekly/monthly injections since those are one big dose atonce and you’re great for a while and then crash. And since at the time ofstarting HRT my depression was rly rly shitty my doctor thought this was a muchhealthier option for my mental health lmao. My voice is waaaay deeper than it everhas been which is great.  I’ve become avery hairy human being everywhere BUT my face which is gARBage (my dadapparently didn’t have to shave until he was 27 so I think I will be the sametha NKS DAD) And then things are growing down below which that’s a little tmibut it’s the truth so. Overall, my transition so far has been pretty smooth.And my mom and I are looking into a top surgeon in my city that apparently isincredible which is a feat in itself because im from texas which yikes.

And then with friends reaction to my coming out? It was alot better than I could’ve hoped. Again, I’m from texas so I didn’t have highhopes for a lot of being to be understanding, but the amount of support andlove I got from people I was sure would drop me like that was incredible.

From my point of view, I don’t think many of my closefriends from high school had a very hard time adjusting with pronouns or me beingtrans at all. Almost all of them just kinda told me like “this makes a lot ofsense, but you’re just you and I love you no matter what.” Also all my theatrefriends laughed because I had always wanted to play guy roles and when I wascast in them they were my best performances so everyone was like WE SHOULD HAVE KNOWN. College friends were a littledifferent because they’d only known me for 2 years as opposed to since like 6thgrade so people were supportive but I really only talk to one person fromcollege still who she’s like my best friend so yeah.

Honestly the biggest adjustment I think was actually myname? Which I lowkey actually fought my mom and family over changing my namebecause my birth name was a traditionally “boy” name.  Like idc I’ll just say it, my birth name wasCarson, which yes. Sounds like a male name. And that was the issue my parents had? That I already had a boy soundingname so why would I change it? They thought I was just doing it cause everytrans person does which. Inaccurate but ok. Not every trans person is the samebut I digress. What I eventually made them understand is that like yEAH cool itsounds like a boy name to you but mentally for me it is forever equated withbasically 20 years of being thought of and referred to as a girl so hey maybeit makes me uncomfortable to be called that crazy r  I g  ht.  Obvs we worked through that because Iam now working on getting my name changed to Toby, but that was really thebiggest thing people had a hard time with in my experience.

Again, it was hard because it’s basically having to relearn atrained response to something, but you don’t know how happy my best friend fromcollege was when she was able to tell me she was talking about me to herparents and she didn’t even have to think twice about saying toby.

As far as pronouns and birth names go,  I personally accepted that people were goingto mess up. I couldn’t expect people to get it right 100% of the time right offthe bat because it was basically just instinct to say  she/her or use my birth name. I knew they didn’tmean any harm by it and just gently corrected them each time. As long assomeone is making an effort and genuinely doesn’t want to hurt me byaccidentally misgendering me, I have no issues.

Obviously I can’t speak for your friend, but what did annoyme was when people would freak out and apologize over and over after theymessed up. So when people immediately went into a big speech about how they’retrying so hard and it’s so difficult for them and yadah yadah. Which I canunderstand. My therapist has helped me and my family with a lot because she’shelped us realize it isn’t just me transitioning, it’s my entire familytransitioning in their own way with me. One is admittedly much harder than theother lmao but still. It is a change for those around me, but acting like it’ssuch a big burden on other’s shoulders to have to try and change use ofpronouns or names is kinda a kick in the gut to the person transitioning. Bestadvice I have for you on that front is to just keep trying and if you do messup, (which you will. It’s just human nature. My mom still calls me by my birthname on occasion because she just forgets and she has 20 years of instinct workingagainst her) be genuine and apologize, try to be the one to correct yourselfinstead of your friend doing so, and don’t blow it up into a huge thing. Again,I can’t speak for your friend, but I usually just wanted the conversation tocontinue like normal afterwards, not deal with someone giving me 60 differentexcuses about messing up.

I hope this helped somehow?? I rambled  a lot lmAO…

But yeaH!! Please tell ur friend I’m really proud of them,and give them all the support and love you can because it’s one of the bestthings you can give them

[johnnyvincent]

Millstone - cromulent

contains: yelling, fighting

crom·u·lent

kɹɑmjələnt

adjective

appearing legitimate but actually being spurious

◌◌◌◌◌◌

62 days before

October 31st, 2007

Wednesday

◌◌◌◌◌◌

Not a lot different happened between then and Halloween. I mean yeah, we still hung out and went to class and ate and slept and shit, but I guess it’s not really all that noteworthy. My time with Wade took a big blow, mainly ‘cause I didn’t see him without Lainey unless we were in our dorm at night and even then he sometimes snuck her in. Not even to get laid or anything, all they did was talk or play on the arcade machine. I was gettin’ real sick of Lainey.

It came as no surprise to me when on Halloween he gave me some half-assed excuse on why he couldn’t pregame with me and the guys and why it’d be a lot better if he just went to go pick up—you guessed it—Lainey. Tired of hearing anything even remotely related to her at that point, I just shrugged it off and let him run off with his dumb cheap cologne.

That’s pretty much how I ended up alone in the boy’s dorm on Halloween of 2007. I mean, not alone, just without my best bud. It was me and the guys, even Russell had come down for the occasion. I gotta say, I was shocked when they said he was graduatin’ last year, but he said Hopkins had a hand in it, or something. I don’t know. That’s a story for another time.

We had kicked out all the geeks and nerds and losers from the dorm, which was mainly just… well, nerds. That and a couple middle schoolers, and some freshmen. After that was done we just hung out in the common room, managed to hook up the T.V. to some horror movie I don’t remember the name of and snack on some chips and beam colas. I was wearin’ a Ghostface mask I’d found last summer when they cleaned out Griffith’s dorm. Yeah, after… yeah.

Anyway, there we sat, me and the guys. I was on the floor with Davis—somehow I always ended up next to him if Wade wasn’t there—while Ethan and Trent crowded on the couch with Russell. Troy’d gotten creeped out and gone off to play on the arcade machine, even though he said he wasn’t scared. Baby.

I woulda been havin’ a nice time if it weren’t for Trent screaming every time some sort of jump scare popped up. Watching movies with that kid was like puttin’ on the Saw movies for a group of toddlers. He screamed just like a little girl.

“Trent, I’m warning you, if you don’t shut your trap I’ll shove my fist down it,” I told him after his eightieth scream. He replied with a real neat flip of the bird. Nothin’ like a real, honest friendship.

A couple minutes later, right when I could just feel Trent about to screech again (I swear, my bones whispered to me, they were all ‘c’mon Tom, brace yourself, it’s gonna happen and it’s gonna be the worse one yet man, he’s gonna scream like a little girl and he might piss himself and it’ll run down his leg onto your good shirt man, brace yourself’) the light flips on and we’re all distracted by Wade’s voice booming from behind us. At least Trent didn’t get to scream.

“Yo, yo, yo, guys,” he says, all casual and of course he’s got his arm draped over Lainey’s shoulders. And then I realize he’s wearin’ mouse ears and so is she but she’s also got a red bow on her head paired with a red dress that’s got white polka dots on it and I realize they’re fucking Mickey and Minnie Mouse. I could feel myself getting lightheaded.

“Haha, nice costume, Wade,” Russell says from the couch, and it took a little bit not to roll my eyes at that. Yeah, I was doing my best to get rid of the ‘she-stole-my-best-friend’ jealousy, but I mean come on. Couples costumes? Where was the Wade I knew?

But Wade just grinned, and Lainey beamed, and reached for the hand that wasn’t set around her shoulders. “Thanks! We thought it’d be super cute,” she chirped in her sweet little girl voice. It was like when you get some dessert at a restaurant, and it’s super sweet? Like, so sweet it kinda makes your eyes hurt a little and if you keep eating it you’ll get a headache, and honestly it just kinda makes you a little bit sick. But you keep eating it ‘cause I mean, when the hell are you gonna get dessert this sweet at home? But then you don’t enjoy it and kinda have to swear off sweets for a bit ‘cause it made you sick. Yeah?

“You look like a wimp,” Troy mumbled loud enough for her and Wade to hear. Lainey kinda looked down at her shoes like she’d just gotten kicked, and it peeved Wade off plenty.

“Piss off, Miller,” he spat.

Troy looked like he wanted to answer Wade for that one, but just as he was about to Trent hopped over the backrest of the couch and wormed his way in between Wade and Lainey, throwin’ his arm around both of them and launching into some long fit about how he loved their costumes, mainly aimed at Lainey. I couldn’t tell if he was hitting on her or just trying to keep the peace.

Wade kinda broke away from it to get a soda, and I recognized the face he had. He was still pissed at Troy for insulting him; my best bet was that he felt like a wimp too, but on some stronger level he wanted to keep Lainey happy. Even if it did mean catering to her stupid girly choices and costumes. I remember calming down at that thought; wasn’t right to be pissed at him. He was just too in love with her, that was all.

I hopped up and made my way to him, grabbing a beam cola for myself. “Hey dude, you good?”

He gave me a tight smile. “I’m okay,” he answered. He was trying. He was trying to be in a better mood. Maybe it was for me or maybe it was for Lainey, but it meant a lot.

“You gonna be good headin’ out with your girl? You know how these things get on Halloween…” I pointed out to him, rubbin’ the back of my neck. This was dangerous territory now. Wade didn’t like having his decisions questioned, not even by me. Even the most nonchalant approach could set him off, and the last thing I wanted was him stompin’ off in the other direction.

But he just nodded, turned so he was watching Trent talk Lainey’s ear off. “Yeah. She says she’s cool with it. I mean, it’d be cool if we could just not get in any fights…” he said, trailing off. I think he caught wind of the look I was giving him, ‘cause Wade not gettin’ into fights was crazier than a hen with a full set of teeth. “At least until I drop her off back at her house when her curfew hits.”

Alright, that made sense. I nodded, and after a bit of prodding, we got Russell to start leading us all out.

We wouldn’t be going far, just around campus. That was where the fun was, anyway. I mean, there was more stuff going on around town; the greaseballs and dropouts and Griffith’s kids would be partying it up in Coventry, and the Preps probably had some sort of classy ‘get-together’ either in their frat house or in Old Bullworth Vale. But our real interest was on campus.

It was all to us, basically. Even if the Preps were on campus, they wouldn’t be leaving their frat house. The greasers and punks were out, that only left us, the jocks, the nerdlings, and the other losers. But the jocks always partied on the football field—one of ‘em had a birthday or something—and the rest of them were no threat to us. Hell, they were the entertainment.

Halloween’s usually a blur to me, and this time was no exception. I don’t even remember how, but I had an egg carton shoved into my hands within seconds of leaving the dorm, a carton that ended up smashed entirely upside Melvin O’Connor’s back. And as he ran off wailing about his costume, I reached out to high-five Wade only to realize he was five feet away from me.

He was walkin’ with Lainey, holding her hand and pointing at something in the opposite direction of us, but she was looking over his shoulder straight at me with wide eyes. Scared. Something told me Wade hadn’t prepared her for how our Halloweens usually went down.

Even though it pissed me off a little bit, I decided to cool it with the pranks and fighting, mainly for Wade’s sake. I’ll say it again, it ain’t right for your best friend to screw up the only decent relationship you’ve ever had in your life. I wasn’t gonna do that to Wade.

But it wasn’t enough. I could calm myself down, sure, but that still left five other guys to run around wild. Russell was handing out wedgies as if they were blessings and he was the Pope, and the rest of them were going wild with some firecrackers Davis had found while he himself messed around with the slingshot he’d found last spring after Hopkins took his.

We’d gotten around to the library and by that point, it looked like Wade was trying to calm down Lainey who looked like she’d seen a ghost. We kept on past a Volcano 4000 that nobody was standing around—everybody knew better than to get near those things—when suddenly Wade went down.

“You deserve it, bully!” A voice to the tune of Donald fuckin’ Anderson screamed out from behind us. He was holdin’ one of ‘em fancy potato guns the nerds had built. He’d hit Wade with a fucking potato.

To say it was a mistake would be a terrible understatement. He was alone, for starters, and he picked the one of us with the worst temper to hit.

Wade was making an effort not to fight or anything for Lainey, but I swear, when I saw his eyes as he stood from that potatoing, they were red. “I’LL BREAK EVERY BONE IN YOUR SCRAWNY LITTLE BODY, CHUMP!” he roared and launched himself at the nerd.

Anderson went down instantly, and Wade went with him. All I could see was a blur of fists pounding down on the kid, and then sneakers hitting pavement while the other guys ran up to help Wade beat up this 92-pound kid. I glanced at Lainey, but I figured I’d rather be the guy who helped out when his best friend got hit than the guy who hung back to shrug at his best friend’s girl.

“When I’m done with you, your jaw is gonna be wired shut! And you’ll be eating through a straw!” Wade screamed at the kid, all of us punching and kicking and snarling and glaring. There wasn’t a lot of room, and I touched the kid maybe twice. We backed up once he was done fightin’ back and just left him there, on the concrete, crying for his ma.

The guys head off, high fiving and laughing, but I hung back a little bit. Lainey wasn’t standing where she had been; she was trailing off in a speedwalk with Wade just barely managing to catch up to her. He grabbed her arm but she tore it from him and they broke out into a heated discussion I couldn’t hear.

My ma taught me to pick the times I wanna listen in and I knew this wasn’t one of ‘em. So I walked along with the guys, trying to keep my eyes off Wade and his girl.

It was a good plan for a couple paces, and then I felt a hand grab my arm and suddenly I was being pulled back into the shadows.

“Man, what the hell?” I asked Wade. But then I quit it, ‘cause he looked spooked. “Are you okay? What happened?”

He just shrugged, blue eyes wide and scared and running wild, reminding me of fish when you try and catch ‘em with a net from their bowl. “I think me and Lainey just broke up…” he whispered.

And so it begins.

[courage-a-word-of-justice]

Erased 6 – 13 (not including the digest) | Showa Genroku Rakugo Shinjuu 1 - 4 | Eldlive 1 | Prince of Stride: Alternative 1

The idea from now on for SGRS: Expect first time watches for this show (for the second season) and don’t expect ratings after each ep. Once all 2016 shows are done (rewatches or not), expect the 2016 ranking.

The idea from now on for POSA: Once all 2016 shows are done (rewatches or not), expect the 2016 ranking.

(ep 6)

Even with only subs, you can hear the seriousness in the manager’s voice.

Asagi beer, LOL.

This speech bubble style really works in the camera angles’ favour.

Airi’s mother reminds me of Midoriya’s mum from Boku no Hero Academia.

Shinji-go. “Go”… I didn’t really know how to explain it so I let Wiktionary do it for me.

I really love Airi’s motivational quotes around this point. So much, that I used it as motivation all through 2016…although I didn’t get any great results from it…

(ep 7)

Okay, that scrolling scene with the kids…that’s just cheap. They aren’t even animated.

It says something like “Preserve water” or “Water is important” on the wall behind the tap.

That “stand out in the hallways with those buckets” is pretty typical for an anime. I wonder whether any real Japanese person has done that, though?

Oh yeah. I think I was initially attracted to this due to the fact it looks a lot like Detective Conan when you see Satoru negotiating the future by changing his past.

I think I had to learn what a “patsy” meant for this scene, but a patsy is just a substitute, specifically in this case for collateral damage.

Does that mean Kenya lived (or lives) in a big house?

(ep 8)

Wait – wait? How did Gaku know how Kayo was safe…unless he was the murderer? I didn’t question that the first time, but this just makes the ending even worse. This dude’s already proved he doesn’t act on compulsion like Satoru does, so that adds to it.

That joke about Satoru being 29 does get a bit worn out when it gets used here…

Mt. Hakodate…I’d heard of it from Touken Ranbu. It’s a good place for low level swords, IIRC.

POP Noodle, LOL.

Crying in media is much more emotional if you can hear the crying, unfortunately. That’s why I passed on “Kayo’s first homecooked meal” for the Crunchyroll Awards.

(ep 9)

Akemi’s (Kayo’s mother’s) eyes were so off model before the shovel scene, it made it hard to take Akemi seriously.

It’s weird how much Gaku looks like he should be Satoru’s dad.

Akemi was “Takashima” before she was “Hinazuki”, and her partner’s name at the time of her divorce was Kazuo.

CGI car…again. Geez.

I think the kanji for “closure” mean the ending curtain, like that of a play, but I can’t quite remember their literal meaning…

“I have to stop somewhere.”

Gaku’s talking about his experiences somehow reminds me of a chat I had with Elucida on the Boueibu chat. Probably because the instigator of the chat had to apologise…

I wonder if the man (Gaku) was lying about the lollies?

“I am a man.” – Translation choices make Hiromi seem a little too macho for his girly looks, haha. *cringes, because I hear emphasis on “am”, with a lesser emphasis on “man” in my head*

I just realised – Kayo won’t go to Mt Hakodate as she’s supposed to anymore…It makes me sad on the inside.

(ep 10)

Holy plays, Batman! Romeo and Juliet for an 11 year old is pretty far fetched considering I only read it when I was…um…16 or 17. I haven’t even read King Lear yet so consider me out of this. (Shucks...even though I used to be an avid reader, I’m only ordinary now, huh?)

LOL. In the end, Kenya really is a little kid, getting all offended about hideouts, haha.

I thought the “getting rid of someone’s alone time is a good thing” sentence was a bit weird until I realised what context Hiromi used it in.

“On the outs”? I didn’t know what that meant until I checked it up. Well, considering I make my own phrases up a lot and I tend to omit small words in the vein of “wut dis?”, maybe I’m just too slang for the subbers.

CGI bus? Man, you ruined the solemn mood a bit, Mr Bus.

See? These CGI cars (and truck) are why I have gripes with CGI transport. It sticks out too much. However, for something like Ajin (which can only be found in CGI form), I don’t mind it so long as everything else about it is good. Speaking of which, I still have yet to see Ajin (as of the point of typing).

“…spirit and drive.” – Because the camera focussed on Gaku’s hands just then, I had to LOL in my head a little.

Manabu = Gaku by virtue of alternate character reading. Isn’t kanji great? (sarcastic)

This sublimation, I presume? I checked it up once, but it was never of any use.

(ep 11)

The Spider’s Thread, as told by Ryunosuke Akutagawa. Bungou taught me about it, but I’m not sure the Bungou instance is the one I first met it in.

This fourth wall breaking…it’s somewhat disturbing, but that’s the mood the staff were going for. Very effective.

I’ve always wondered why the “Boku” in the titlecard had a different font. Maybe the staff just didn’t have a “boku” in the font they’d written the title in…

I guess it must be my warped perception of beauty due to bishonen, but when Satoru is lying on the bed with slightly sallow cheeks, he almost looks…beautiful. (That’s a scary thought, isn’t it?)

“Future”…such a powerful name, since it happens to be the name of the baby, too.

Imagine if Kayo and Yuri Katsuki’s (Yuri!!! on Ice) backstories were stitched together.

A gingko leaf. They have a very distinctive shape…(Reminds me of Fusae Campbell from Detective Conan.)

Gaku is just represented by a black silhouette in some frames. Basically, you could call it another Detective Conan reference of sorts.

(ep 12)

The problem with the ending that I have, if you don’t know already, is that it suddenly makes you realise that Satoru would either die or have planned/have some caveat to get out of/around a potential death. Unfortunately, they don’t show you when he’s made those plans, thus being deceptive by omission if they were even made.

CGI hamster wheel…?

By the laws of ordinary protagonist writing…I give you the ending. The ending that dissatisfied me so much, it definitely left SGRS first for 2016.

They never explained how the rail was pulled open either, come to think of it.

Hey, it’s Boys’ Flight. The magazine he was reading earlier in the show. Don’t remember what ep, though.

Hey, did I ever mention to you that I tried to open up an Erased wiki, only to find one already open? There’s still two wikis existing right now for some reason, though.

Well, it’s been a wild ride. Thanks all, if you’ve been coming along with me and hope to see you again soon.

(SGRS ep 1)

Zony, LOL. Did Sony exist in that era?

If you observe the left flag when Yotaro stops at the front of the theatre, you can see the characters for “Amakentei” (rain-bamboo-stand, or something like it). That’s Kappei Yamaguchi’s character…Update: Must’ve been a mistake on my part. Amaken is a critic, but not a rakugoka himself.

Yotaro’s still got all the mannerisms of a gangster, LOL. (Including interrogation technique.)

There’s a sign in the back of Yotaro when he talks to Yakumo for the first time. It says “Sumi” (top – bottom) “Sushi” (L – R).

Yotaro uses the word “tanomu”, which is a respectful way of saying “I beg of you”. Very respectful. The most polite kind of respectful.

Mukojima? Huh? I guess that’s a deliberate bungling of Konnichiwa? (Update: Nope.) However, I’m still a noob to rakugo myself, despite having created the wiki to spread some Yakumo love.

Note for later: Shinigami has a distinctive “Ajaraka mokuren kyuraisu tegeretsuno pa!” in it.

What’s the old man writing?

It’s a transformation of sorts, from Yota being nervous to showing off what he’s got. That’s what makes SGRS so powerful.

I was pondering this since the start of the performance, but Yota’s shark-like teeth make him a very distinctive character. Then again, there’s always that one cue or other to tell you that a certain character is in the house.

Should a woman only have her beauty? I never believed it and that’s what I set out to prove in my stories, but…social mores were different back then, so I can’t speak for Konatsu.

Oh! I completely forgot about this guy (Mangetsu) until he came back in ep 14.

Notes for later: “Namu myoho renge kyo…”/a pilgrim climbing Mt Minobu

There is a slight irony in a woman telling a man to “man up”. Subbers, you put that there.

(ep 2)

Oh? Were you wondering what those “notes for later” were for? The wiki, naturally. SGRS’s only presence is me most days, so I’d better keep it up to date.

This show never fails to make me laugh, even if the laughter gets more subdued the second time.

Apparently people get sento and onsen confused a lot. Sento are normally cheaper smaller establishments compared to onsen, as far as I know.

Why is there a cat in the room?!

The “Hatsu” in Hatsutaro means “beginning”, while the “Kiku” in Kikuhiko is a chrysanthemum, so…yeah. Take it as you will.

“…your first time?” (laughs behind back) No wonder Haruko Kumota was a BL mangaka before she did SGRS.

Even without the volume, the visual language can tell you Kiku’s doing something wrong. That’s the power of this show.

“Akanbou” is a Japanese word for baby, as you may have guessed. However, people seem to use the word “aka-chan” more these days. Thus, another guess tells you that “shiro” is white and “ao” is blue. Right again.

You can almost hear the voices even with only subs! Amazing!

Fish cake. Technically called kamaboko, but “fish cake” is the translation for it so I guess I shouldn’t be such a weeb.

(ep 3)

“…it’ll become standard in the rakugo world.”

Oh, the cat is Yakumo 7th’s.

Mosquito coils? When were they invented?

CGI train? I barely noticed it there. Plus…poor Kiku. He never gets the girls.

Kagurazaka.

Were sento really cheap enough to be five coins?

(ep 4)

Do those girls count as off model?

The texture on the bricks of the restaurant are hyperrealistic…I like it. Better than that messed up CGI you get on most cars in anime these days.

Kuma -> Kumako. I wonder why.

As I’ve noted on the wiki, the pun about the samurai involves the word samui (cold). Therefore the original pun would’ve been “now you die out here in the cold, samurai”, but if you’re going for lame jokes that work seamlessly into the rakugo, then…the samu-die joke pretty much does its job.

There was the word “open” twice in one sentence…subbers, you need to proofread sometimes.

The “treasure sacks” pun is on kintama…welp, I won’t explain it, but “family jewels” apparently works just as well.

If Mukojima is a place, then why were people saying it in ep 1?

LOL, Matsuda. Going “I won’t have anything to do with this” is bound to get you in trouble nonetheless.

Yakumo’s heart is so clearly not into it. You can tell from the body language.

(Eldlive 1)

I’m here because I fell out of love with Hibari a while back and I need to give Akira Amano another chance. Also, Lane Brick…maybe.

Wait. It’s a Mukuro! With glasses! That foreshadows the pain I’m gonna be in for.

Welp, considering I read the manga this was adapted from not too long ago (as of the time of watching this), it’s pretty faithful. Even if it does look visually pretty, I did come up with a story like this once but it never took off when it came to writing the story. Considering it also bears some similarity to One Wish They Never Wanted, it’ll never take off now.

Finally(!) Something to laugh at. Reborn injoke.

…Unfortunately, with the faithfulness of the manga comes the pervasive problem – I thought Eldlive was a bit subpar. I could see all the right tropes were there to make a hit, but I couldn’t see any real talent showing through, as if Amano’s resigned herself to doing only shonen because Reborn succeeded. It was Hibari that taught me you can have a cute bird sidekick instead of a monster designed from scratch, so why can’t Eldlive do that too?

Drew (the voice) is getting annoying already. Shaddap!

…another “unfortunately” is that Lane Brick isn’t too pretty compared to how I like my bishonen, but YMMV on that.

I didn’t check it when I read the manga…but Jean Renoir.

Great. (sarcastic) Bungou humour, to boot! That wasn’t in the original…and it’s just grim, too.

These mammary jokes aren’t doing it for me either, although they were in the original.

Verdict: Not taking it.

(POSA ep 1)

Prince of Stride was a new experience for me, as I thought I needed to add “sport anime” to my repetoire at the time. Unfortunately, I still haven’t gotten past my biases against sport anime even after finishing this…

Welp, I take back what I’ve said about OPs in the first episode. If it’s a good OP, it helps to set the norm.

CGI basketball. One of the weirdest things on the list of “things given CGI form in anime” to date, because it’s mostly cars.

Sad life. When people in a rejected club see that twist coming, it’s like a 4th wall break…kinda sorta.

Did I ever mention that this show is motivational? It’s really good for that, and colourful so it’s good for desktop wallpapers. (Also, it has a summer theme to it, so while I swelter, lemme just watch a show about running…and sweating…bad idea? I guess so. (sarcastic) However, there isn’t any better season to watch it in. Sweat – or imagined sweat – isn’t good any season of the year, so might as well watch it while I still have time.)

Tsurugiya…if Google-sensei serves me correctly…it’s in Osaka…? Update: I knew he came from somewhere in the country, but Hyogo is a different place to Osaka…

“Blue Sonic”. Well, it’s not like there would be a magazine called Sanic. Or Knuckles, for the matter.

What’s with the panda, though? Although, as some very obvious foreshadowing tells you, (Kyosuke) Kuga used to have his locker here.

How in Dante’s Inferno did Kohinata get the measurements of Takeru already?!

I checked up kabaddi last time, but eh, I’ll do it again.

I still think Fujiwara’s leg thing is creepy.

I dunno anything about Sun Tzu…but…lessee here. This quote is it, I think.

Who was the Relationer in the previous Stride Club?

What’s with the cat on the poster?!

“…is really hot…” – Is that what sets the shippers off? Or is that just a subbers’ choice of words?

They always blab aout weird things on the next ep preview. At least it’s not boring.

For some reason, my ad blocker isn’t working on AnimeLab any more…*sighs*