#our parents are family friends so we are basically relatives
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#crebsketch#ocs#dumping here for archival purposes again#kurt#lea#they have like.#our parents are family friends so we are basically relatives#vibes to me#adding more oc art to my phone background collection c:#its very odd having my art percieved in school by like. actual art kids. who recognize and like my funky lines#it’s not unpleasant i mean. very new however#finished coloring this at 3 am basically while listening to ppl on night watch talk#that was fun however i don’t think i should get into a habit of that too much LMAO
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AITA for tricking my grandma into misgendering her cat?
Background: my (19F) grandma (67F) is a southern baptist and pretty conservative. My cousin (Matt, 24M) is trans, he came out to his parents and mine about two years ago because he knew we would be supportive, but he waited until he was on T a couple months and was mostly transitioned socially before he officially came out to our less supportive relatives, like my grandma.
Since Matt came out to everyone else (which he did by showing up at family Christmas with a “hello my name is” sticker on, which I thought was hilarious) my grandma has refused to use his correct pronouns, name, or anything, saying “it’s hard to switch” as an excuse. Matt has cut off contact and everyone else in the family just kind of avoids talking about him around her.
I am in a weird situation because my family lives the next street over from where she does, and we have always been pretty close. Since she started being so shitty about Matt, though, I’ve put more distance and just stay polite when she’s over.
Okay so now to the AITA part. About two months ago my grandma wanted to adopt a cat, and my best friend volunteers at an animal shelter so we were helping her. We showed her pictures of some of the cats and she saw an older male who was all black with longer fur and said she wanted to adopt “her.” I started to correct her saying it was a male cat, and then realized the opportunity I had so I kept my mouth shut. I made a point to handle all the adoption stuff for my grandma so she never saw anything indicating the cat’s male-ness, and then brought home her new “female” cat, pink collar and all.
Last week “Miss Kitty” (such a creative name) got a paw injury and at the vet they told my grandma the cat was male. My grandma told me and my parents about it when she was over for the Fourth of July (we had family and friends over for barbecue, including Matt’s parents). I made a point from there on to continue using “she” for the cat and still calling “Miss Kitty” instead of “Mister Kitty.” It took her a minute to notice but finally she called me out and said “he’s a boy, stop saying she.”
I immediately snapped back with “oh so it’s easy for you to switch the name and pronouns of your cat but not your own grandson?” Everyone got quiet and she got all flustered, trying to say it’s different, but I just said “oh okay, so you put more effort into using the right words for a cat who doesn’t even know English, got it.”
My mom told me to stop and leave it alone. I said “I’m just saying, it’s pretty clear who she cares about more.” And then my mom told me to leave the table if I was going to act like that. I just got up and took my plate in the kitchen and finished eating.
After everyone left my mom lit into me and told me that what I said was cruel. I said I was just teaching her a lesson and that maybe now she would think about it different. My mom said that I just made things worse and humiliated her on purpose in front of everyone. My dad had been quiet but then just started laughing. He realized that I had been playing the long game, and it wasn’t a mix up at the shelter- I led my grandma to believe the cat was female. He basically said “that was wrong but also hilarious” and now my mom is mad at both me and my dad. When Matt’s parents told him he thought it was super funny and said he isn’t mad at all.
My mom wants me to apologize, but I am not sorry about what I said. I don’t know if I should feel bad about tricking my grandma, because I didn’t technically outright lie, I just didn’t correct her when she assumed the cat was female. AITA?
What are these acronyms?
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Due to the overwhelming majority of positive votes on my poll, this is a small snip of my as of now unnamed destiel fic. Please please please talk to me about how I can improve or what you liked about it <3
———
Cas was alone. Again. His roommate had fucked off, predictably, and left him to stew alone in their half unpacked room right before his first classes of the year. Normally, he’s fine being by himself. Thrives in it, really. But after the way he left things with his family, he’s craving human contact more than ever.
His parents will tell you he “ran away,” but, really, he just never told them he got accepted into KU. He just packed his bags, and left for the fall semester. He had been working jobs since he was fifteen and had saved every last cent of his pay, so he had some money to help with tuition. He also got one mean scholarship, so all he really needs are the books. But that won't stop his parents from calling him “selfish” and “entitled” when all he really wants is to live his life not being constantly squished into the image of the perfect son that hasn’t fit him in a long ass time.
It also doesn’t help that they are super religious and did not support him coming out as gay. They insisted it was a “phase” and “would pass.” But Cas had known for years that he was into men. He knew it before when he picked a girl in class to “like” just so he would fit in. He knew it in Senior year when Hannah, a girl in his school, invited him over to her house to study, or so he thought. She said she was going to change into something more comfortable and he figured that meant pajamas, but apparently that meant buck ass nude. He was embarrassed and, frankly, grossed out. He made a speedy exit, and avoided her for the rest of the year. His parents, Chuck in particular, kept asking him what ever happened to “that lovely Hannah girl.” Well, now they know why they never saw her again.
Pushing away the thought of his family, he rises from his bed to get ready. He throws on a pair of worn dark wash jeans, a black shirt, and pulls a battered gray zip-up over it all. He grabs the old messenger bag he was able to snatch from his father before he left, and fills it with the books he’s going to need today.
The walk to class was pretty uneventful. It was a nice day, and Cas only got lost once. He quickly asked for directions, and was relieved that he wasn’t even that far off course.
He was still pretty proud of himself when he got to the lecture hall. It was relatively full, but not so that it was hard to find a seat. He ended up picking one close to the middle next to a small redhead with glasses. They shared a polite smile before she reached her hand out for him to shake. “Hey there. I’m Charlie.”
Cas tentatively grasped her hand and gave it a firm shake. “Hello, Charlie. My name is Castiel.”
“Oh, that’s so cool! I might have to steal it for my new DnD character,” she playfully shoots back.
“Yes, well, you would be too late considering it’s already the name of mine.” His lips tick up in a smile as he sees her face brighten.
“Dude, you should totally come over and play sometime! I’ve only got one other friend who plays, and his younger brother who’s usually our DM.” Her eyes widen a fraction before she continues frantically, “I mean, obviously you don’t have to, and this is kinda weird since we know basically nothing about each other and-”
“I would love to join you, Charlie.” He cuts off her rambling before she can talk herself out of his invite.
Her face splits into a wide grin, and she’s beaming again. “Did we just become besties?” she asks.
“Yes, I believe we did,” Cas amusedly answers.
-
The Queen: handmaiden, come quick
emergency dnd meet in my room
now!
and bring the good popcorn
-
Dean gets the text as he’s finishing his last class for today. He’s pretty drained from all of the “introduce yourself” and “get to know you” chats that he was forced into all day. The sun’s setting, and all he really wanted was to curl up in bed and maybe watch Tombstone for the millionth time. But he loves Charlie, and he can’t refuse his queen. He shoots off a text saying he’ll be right there, and heads for his room to get the requested snack.
Ten minutes later, he’s standing outside Charlie’s dorm with the half cheesy, half caramel popcorn that she likes. He knocks once and is utterly unprepared for what he sees when he lets himself in.
“Hey, Charles-”
He stops in his tracks as he takes in the scene. Charlie and some guy are sitting on the floor as Charlie is very animatedly ranting about something or another and the guy is just sitting there, softly but excitedly smiling at her. Upon second glance, the guy is hot. He’s wearing a shirt that hugs his shoulders perfectly and matches his messy black curls. The guy also has a straight nose and full lips. When he looks up at Dean, he’s struck by just how blue his eyes are. Blue enough to drown in. Shut up, brain.
Their impromptu staring contest is interrupted by Charlie springing up from her spot on the floor and practically yanking him all the way inside the room. “Dean,” she says, “this is Castiel. We have English together and he mentioned he plays DnD, so I invited him over to see if we could coerce you and Sam into getting a game started.” He raises a quizzical brow and her responding look says “just go with it.”
“Uh, hey, man,” he says, transferring the nearly forgotten bag of popcorn under his left arm, reaching the other out for the guy to shake.
“Hello, Dean.” And damn, if he hadn't thought this guy was hot before, he definitely thinks so now. His voice is whiskey smooth yet still has a gargling gravel quality to it. His handshake is strong, too. And just as he realizes that fact, he also recognizes that he’s held this guy's hand for a beat too long and was staring again.
He clears his throat and extracts his hand, trying to control the flush he’s feeling. Judging by the small smirk on this Castiel guy’s face, he’s failed miserably.
Turning back to Charlie, resolutely ignoring the self satisfied smile on her smug little face, he extracts the popcorn from under his arm and offers it to her with a small bow. “M’lady,” he recites.
“Why thank you, handmaiden,” she says liltingly, and pats him on the head.
“Anything for you, my queen,” he says as he straightens.
He throws a glance back over at the guy, who is doing a comically adorable squint-tilt of confusion. He sniggers a little to himself. Where did Charlie find this guy? “So, Cas,” he starts, “are you a sweet or salty kind of guy?”
The squint deepens until the whole look smoothes out. “Well, I prefer sweet to salty snacks, if that’s what you’re asking. Although I do believe that opinion is almost entirely based off of my older brother sharing his sugar addiction with me.” His face turned contemplative and almost yearning.
“Well, that’s good since that half and half crap she has me pick up is more 70-30 on carmel to cheese. Now it works out,” he grins, “you two can split the 70 and I’ll get the 30 all to myself.”
“That’s… agreeable.”
His smile widens much more than the comment earned, but he can’t help it. He’s swooning and the man only said two words. “Great, I’ll get Sammy on the phone. Charles, why don’t you and Cas set up the game?”
Sam picks up on the third ring, predictably still awake and not trying to ignore his big brother. “Hey, Dean. How did your first day go?”
“Ah, it was alright, Sammy. Met some people, found some classes, nothing real eventful until now.”
“Until now? What does that mean?” He sounds equal parts concerned and cautious.
“Nothing bad, you can relax. Charlie found herself a new bestie, and we were just wonderin’ if your dungeon master skills could be brought out for a quick game.”
There’s a large sigh on the other end of the phone before he inevitably relents. “Fine. Put me on speaker, I’ll go get my notes.”
“Yes, Sammy!” he shouts excitedly “This is why I love you.” He puts his phone on speaker and flashes a thumbs up at the other two in the room who had looked up at his outburst.
“There’s gotta be more reasons than that, jerk,” Sam replies petulantly.
“Why don’t you come over here and find out, bitch,” he throws back.
There's grumbling and shuffling on the phone, and Dean grins triumphantly, even though the comeback didn't make much sense. “Ok,” Sam pauses, “am I on speaker?”
“Yeah. Hi, Sam!” comes Charlie’s reply.
“Hi, Char. And, uh, hi, Charlie’s new bestie?”
“Hello, Sam. My name is Castiel. It is good to speak with you.” Dean could listen to Castiel read an organic chemistry textbook and never get bored.
“Hello, Castiel. It’s nice to meet a fellow nerd,” Sam jokes.
Cas laughs and if Dean likes his voice, he loves his laugh. He could bottle it up and get drunk on it each night. God, when did he turn into such a sap?
They stay on the phone with Sam through a two hour adventure that he found lying in his notes. Afterwards, it’s pretty late, but they stick around and chat for a bit. They find out some random things about Cas, like, he’s 20 (just a year younger than Dean), his favorite animal is a bee (”But that’s not an animal, Cas, It’s an insect.” “And insects are a type of animal, Dean.”), he has one older brother, and apparently is in a band.
“No way, dude! That’s so cool! What do you play?” Charlie practically bounces off of her perch on the edge of her bed in excitement.
“Well, I play guitar, but I also sing, sometimes.” He shrugs, “We’re very flexible with who takes the lead, though. It usually comes down to who wrote the song and what they want to do with it.” He then smiles shyly, “Then again, most of the songs are mine as well, with more than a few written by my friend, Meg.”
Charlie nearly chokes on her own spit. “Wait, Meg, as in Meg Masters?”
The squint-tilt is back. “Yes. Megara Masters. Do you know her?”
Charlie scoffs, “Know her? No. Know of her? Hell yes. What kind of lesbian would I be if I didn't know the hottest gay in school?”
“Hey,” Dean protests, “the hottest gay is obviously that Aaron guy.”
She reached over and gently laid her hand on his cheek, “Oh, sweetie,” she said pleasantly, “you keep telling yourself that.” She pats his cheek lightly before she withdraws her hand. The whole exchange leaves Cas more than a little confused.
The topics ebb and flow however it wants, and soon they’re debating the merits of each Hogwarts house.
“I don’t care what either of you buffoons have to say, I gotta back my girl Harmionie,” Charlie yells.
“We’re not talking about characters, Char, We’re talking about the house itself!” Dean yells back.
“But if we were talking about characters,” Cas chimes, “That would give Hufflepuff a point because of Sedric.”
“Oh, yea?” Charlie snaps. “And where’s Sedric now, Cas? That's right, he’s dead,”
Dea narrows his eyes, “That was a low blow, Char.” No one disrespects Sedric and gets away with it.
Cas is about to speak, presumably to come to Dean’s aid, when his phone chimes. “Oh dear,” he says.
“What is it, Cas?” Dean asks as nonchalantly as he can, but if the look Charlie shot at him is anything to go by, it didn't work very well.
He laughs breathily at his phone and begins tapping away, speaking distractedly as he goes. “It looks like it’s much later than I thought, and Gabriel seems to have been trying to contact me for quite some time now.” He bites his lip thoughtfully before he starts typing again. Dean tries not to let his gaze snag on the gesture.
“If you gotta go, man, that’s cool,” Dean relents.
“Yeah,” Charlie chimes, “we should all probably get some sleep, anyways.”
“Yes I think I might do just that,” Cas answers. Just then his phone starts buzzing in his hand. “I have to take this, but it was lovely meeting both of you, and I hope we can possibly do this again sometime?”
“Of course, dude,” Charlie answers and goes in for a hug. Cas is a bit awkward, but he’s smiling, so it can’t be too bad. “We nerds gotta stick together!” she declares.
Dean sticks his hand out for Cas to shake. It’s firm and strong and lasts a little bit longer than a normal handshake, but Dean’s probably just imagining that. He also probably imagined when Cas’ eyes seemed to flick down to his lips. He had to have imagined it. No way would this guy be interested in a sack like Dean.
Cas seems to come back to himself abruptly when his forgotten phone starts buzzing again. He answers swiftly with a sort of fond and annoyed look that belongs to most younger brothers. “Gabriel, ya kak raz sobiralsya pozvonit'. Chto vam nuzhno?” He casually shoots them a wave, and closes the door on his way out.
Dean and Charlie are left staring after him in shock. Was that Russian?
#spn#dean winchester#destiel#castiel#sam winchester#supernatural#writers on tumblr#my fic#I don’t have a beta yet so if you’ve gotten this far and have thoughts don’t be shy
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our vietnamese tea ceremony
some may or may not know i just got engaged to a weird guy i met in college that (to put it lightly) i wasn’t too fond of but after like 2 years of snubbing him he somehow won my heart i guess
i scribbled a comic about it cause whenever people ask how i met him they sometimes get invested haha
some people also may have seen him on america’s got talent or cbs news or jimmy fallon or on tiktok doing his pizza man shenanigans lol
people often ask if he pulled me with his dough skills and i have to clarify i didn’t even know about the dough spinning hobby until after we started dating and he didn’t do the tv/media appearances until like 6 years into our relationship 🤣
my parents were both boat refugees from vietnam (they fled during the war when they were teenagers and met as adults) and i’m american- but we’re not really that “traditional” i guess
i think many viet people don’t get married or commit without having a tea ceremony haha
a hetero buddy asked who were my bridesmaids and when i told him i don’t have any he asked why and i just said “i like my friends” ���� (my childhood friends were there as guests though!)
i also didn’t want/ask pizza man’s family to bring the customary gifts cause i didn’t wanna cramp my style
basically the purpose of this event was for people to witness us getting engaged and be an opportunity for our families to meet one another!
5/23/2015 is when we started dating
for our first anniversary i got our initials and anniversary date stamped onto a penny and pizza man still carries it around 🥺
so 8 years later we got engaged on 8/5/2023
8 for august (8 years later)
5th of august (5 for the month we began dating)
year of 2023 (23 for the day we began dating)
i think people often go to a fortune teller or someone who knows what they’re doing to schedule important dates using the stars and other factors but my grandpa doesn’t believe in that and the rest of us aren’t really superstitious
we wore áo dài- it’s a vietnamese ensemble consisting of a tunic with a long front and back panel that is worn over pants
áo means “shirt/clothes” and dài means "long"
a lot of the time the bride wears red and the groom wears blue i guess but i wanted my outfit to look bridal when i imagine an american bride or a vietnamese bride!
i also wanted to wear a gold khăn đóng headpiece and to incorporate pearls to resemble what my mom wore when she got engaged to my dad
sunflowers are also my fav
(after we started dating i thought pizza man was tall and sunny like a sunflower haha 😭)
my makeshift shoebox altar- or as i like to call it: my “spirit pager” 😤
the double happiness symbol is two copies of the chinese character 喜 (xǐ) which means joy/happiness and red symbolizes luck for the couple
my mom asked if we should put up pictures of our deceased and i was like i don’t wanna make pizza man’s parents go out of their way to bring photos 😭
i think we were supposed to ask our ancestors for permission to get engaged or married or whatever but since my mom raised me to believe my life is mine to live i just announced it to em
as far as i know it’s not really a buddhist thing- ancestor worship is more of a vietnamese thing apparently
my mom said vietnam is a country with a lot of war and death in its history- so imo it makes sense how they incorporate the dead into their culture and traditions
after introducing each of our family members and friends- we lit a couple of incense to (casually) announce the news to our deceased grandparents and relatives
apparently burning incense is an invitation to ancestral spirits and to deliver wishes to predecessors
smoke from the burning incense guides people to safety or safe passing when they die- it also guides em back home on days like these
the spirit(s) depart when all of the incense has burned
next month is my grandma’s "deathiversary” (giỗ) so we’ll be paging her again soon
we used a tea set that was used to celebrate my 1st birthday to pour and serve (my pick) of vanilla caramel black tea to my grandpa and our parents
pizza man’s mom doesn’t like tea so i was happy i picked something she did enjoy!
but when my mom brought her family to america from vietnam- she asked them if they could bring a tea set specifically for me
my mom said it’s meant to be used to celebrate any of my special occasions
then me and pizza man said some nice words to each other and exchanged rings
my ring was pizza man’s grandma’s- his grandpa initially proposed with a smaller diamond but after he saved up enough he got her this bigger one
i don’t listen to any comments that suggest or imply this carbon rock is not humongous 🤣
pizza man paid to get it resized and to repair its prongs (it was well worn by grandma mercedes 🥺)
also found out my ring size is 3.25 (US) haha 😭
he also decided to get his grandpa’s ring resized and to wear it too!
my mom put this necklace on me- she says it reads “happiness” (i can’t confirm lol) but she received it from her mother-in-law when she got engaged to my dad
my mom was too scared to wear it after their tea ceremony cause it’s 24 karat gold and she didn't wanna wreck it
she said 24 karat gold hasn't been combined with other metals so it’s soft
i guess couples at viet tea ceremonies often get 24 karat jewelry- the idea is they can quickly sell it/melt it down for hard times
my mom also passed down her favorite jade bracelet and my grandma’s favorite diamond earrings to me 🥺
and on my 1st birthday my mom got a special ring made to celebrate my birth- she put it on a chain so the person i marry can wear it close to their heart
my mom also got a special ring necklace made to celebrate my sibling’s birth and gave it to their fiancée during their tea ceremony
it’s just the two of us so no more shiny token trophies up for grabs! 😤
i laughed when pizza man had to squat down so low so my mom could put the necklace on him
after the ceremony i asked him if he wanted me to help him take it off (my sibling's fiancée keeps theirs in a safe cause she’s too scared to wear it daily) but pizza man was like "no i like it 😄" and wore it to sleep and showered with it and hasn’t taken it off since 😭🤣
at the end of the ceremony we lit the candles on the altar to represent the union of our families!
then we ate lots of food haha
my parents both cooked! egg rolls, fried rice, lo mein, bột chiên (fried taro rice cake)
my mom was excited because she knew many of our guests weren’t very familiar with vietnamese food and wanted to share that with them 🥺
and my dad was just so excited for me and pizza man and had so much fun getting the supplies and decorations 😭
my aunt and uncle and sister-in-law brought vịt quay (peking duck), heo quay (roast pork), gỏi tôm (shrimp salad), bánh hỏi (rice vermicelli), xôi gấc (sweet red sticky rice topped with coconut, peanuts and salt)
and pizza man’s mom and family brought lots of desserts
we have always been so amazed with how good their sweets taste and look! 🥺
we also got an ice cream cake
i wasn’t thinking and asked em to write “nicholas and amy lễ đính hôn” and they called me and were like wtf is this and i was like oh no it’s ok haha don’t worry about it! 😭🤣
we had some photos displayed but my sibling took lots of nice pictures of the whole thing!
i was happy i actually got the chance to spend time with and talk to everyone who came!
it went so well and we had so much fun that we’re thinking of doing something similar for our wedding- probably a backyard wedding haha
i was telling pizza man apparently some tea ceremonies have the first half take place at the bride’s home and then the later half is at the groom’s home 🤔
anyway reminder that leftover egg rolls can be reheated in the toaster
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I sometimes see people wondering when Reiko died exactly and how old her daughter was at the time of her death, but we do, in fact, already have a little bit of an answer to this in canon.
Now this is something that is only implied, but in the very first chapter of the manga, during the conversation Natsume has with Nyanko-sensei the first time he reveals his true form and right before our first Reiko flashback, we have this line (that was cut off from the anime):
[NATSUME: She [Reiko] may not have been able to relate well to others... Not many people even remember her, since she died so young. Not even her own daughter...]
[NATSUME: 確かに祖母は人とうまくつきあえなかったらしい 彼女を憶えている 「人」はほとんでいないんだ 娘だった母でさえ記憶にないくらい若くして亡くなっていて・・・・・・]
This is the official English translation, while the fan translation has this:
"There aren't that many people who remember her. She died so young that even my mom, her daughter, probably didn't remember her..."
This leaves some more uncertainty in the phrasing, but the meaning is basically the same. The original Japanese, "母でさえ記憶にないくらい若くして亡くなっていて" is a bit closer to the fan translation in a literal sense, except in Japanese there is no "probably"; Natsume sounds pretty certain his mother didn't remember Reiko.
So, if "not even her own daughter" remembered Reiko, it's fair to assume that she must have died when Takashi's mom was still a child, and a really young one at that.
(I suppose you could maybe make an argument that Reiko could have still died when the daughter was older, but then something happened that made her forget? But that doesn't seem likely to me.)
Now, this was the very first chapter written 20 years ago, back when NatsuYuu still wasn't supposed to become a long series with much of an overarching narrative, so maybe it's something that could change later. Midorikawa has definitely retconned some details in her story before. But for now that's still one of the only crumb of information we have about this.
Which, if this is correct, then it's very sad because that means Reiko only lived with her daughter for a handful of years at most and never even got to see her grow up. And given we know the grandfather wasn't around and Reiko was a single mom, then the daughter probably spent most of her childhood without her parents, and barely knew anything about either of them (or, well, nothing at all in the father's case).
Which also begs the question as to who raised Reiko's daughter after her death then. We knows Reiko had no family, and no one know anything about the grandfather, so there was no relative, even distant ones, to look after her like with Takashi.
Did she just end up in the foster system/an orphanage, or did someone specific took care of her? If so, does that mean there was a person close enough to Reiko that would have taken care of her child like this? Did the daughter just carry the Book of Friends with herself all this time? Did she knows what the Book of Friends even was, or anything about her mother's abilities? During the eastern forest arc, Takashi says that his mother didn't have any spiritual powers, but then again he never met her or know anything about her at all, so who knows how much that can be true.
Regardless, there's something particularly tragic about the idea that each generation of the Natsumes grew up as isolated orphans who barely knew anything about their family.
#Natsume Yuujinchou#NatsuYuu#Natsume Reiko#Natsume Takashi#Natsume's Book of Friends#Natsume#Reiko Natsume#Natsuchou#Takashi Natsume#Connan's Ramblings#Connan's Posts#Natsume Yujincho
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I just started a new semester, and I'm finally getting the chance to take Malayalam, which I've been trying to do since my undergrad. This is obviously a very exciting development, and it's so delightful to be in a language class again for the first time in ages, but it's also been a very unique experience as far as language classes go. First of all, for me, who is generally used to having very odd personal connections to a language and being the overachieving linguist of the class. And second of all because it's just a very different experience to be in a class largely oriented towards heritage learners and people with some cultural familiarity.
There are five people in the class. Of those five, four have Malayalee family and have had some exposure to Malayalam throughout our lives; the last person is a native speaker of another non-Dravidian South Asian language. Of the four of us who are Malayalee, I'm basically the only one who didn't have a significant amount of Malayalam at home growing up. What this means is that we've spent very little time on the phonetics of the language, because everyone roughly knows how to pronounce it - something which wouldn't be true if there were non-South Asian in the class! (It was a bit comforting to hear all the other Malayalees struggling with aspirated consonants, which have constantly been the bane of my existence, and then to hear the instructor say that few people pronounce them right in spoken Malayalam anyways.) The instructor could ask us to say things on the first day, and the more fluent speakers could say them. There is already Malayalam being mixed in with the instruction. I'm sure by the end of the semester we'll be having extended conversations - especially since the two of us who don't speak have very concrete communicative desires for our outside lives.
It's also a very scary experience for me, personally. Or maybe scary isn't quite the right word, but I've always felt out of my depth in claiming Malayalee heritage - I've always felt that there were so many things which I didn't know which any normal Malayalee would. There is no evidence that this is true, at least insofar as that my cousins with two Malayalee parents have wildly varying experiences and I'm not actually that far outside the norm. In most American spaces, I will never be clocked as white, and most people usually immediately identify me as South Asian. Nonetheless, I know that when I visited Kerala this past December, I was decidedly foreign - to the two guys speaking in rapid-fire Malayalam on the flight from Qatar, to the person at the immigration counter in Trivandrum, even to my own relatives. Part of it is a mental block on my part, of feeling myself foreign and therefore never letting myself belong. Part of it is that I am, ultimately, American. But either way, in this class, I can feel that I'm the American in the room, even when I'm not, even when my pronunciation is just as good as the other Malayalees and there's nothing that's telling me I can't belong. I keep freezing up when asked to say real things, or when people speak to me, because there's some unreachable standard in my brain of Not A Real Malayalee, and everything feels fraught and fragile. So maybe this semester will be about overcoming that.
It's still strange being in a language class where the instructor, on the first day, can look at you all and say, "You know why you're here, you want to be here, we all have a shared experience." But it's also a beautiful thing in its own way, and I'm really looking forward to taking on a language in this way. I love the structure and the logic of language, the puzzle of putting it together, the beauty of making friends in it and watching shows in it and listening to songs in it - but as I get older I find myself really reflecting on what it means to learn and to know a language. And sometimes those barriers to learning and to knowing are only in our minds, not in our worlds. Language is communication and connection, and I hope that Malayalam serves me to these two ends, even as it sometimes feels like a trial by fire at each word.
#it's really really lovely getting to study language again in a class setting i forgot how much i missed it#i've definitely been getting a lot more intentional about my language-learning in the last few years though#malayalam is always a challenge for me personally but i'm working on it and i think in that process it'll help me with other languages too#the more you dive into learning heritage languages though the more you realize that no one else feels like they're enough either#and there is beauty in that#anyways. i'll leave this at that. i do have some other malayalam material from my trip in december that i never posted#but we'll see if i ever manage to get around to that idk#malayalam:general
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ONE WEEK left until the LotR SeSa posting deadline!
We hope the writing is going well. ❤️ We already have a few finished fic in the moderation queue, yay!
We still have a few prompters without claims, and as our goal is to make sure each prompter gets at least one fill, we're hoping you can help us out by signal boosting or having a look at the unclaimed prompts to see if one might tempt you. There are summaries of the prompts below as AO3 unfortunately doesn't allow for linking directly to individual prompts. You can find all the prompts HERE.
Gen prompts:
Fandom: The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power
Characters: Elanor "Nori" Brandyfoot, Poppy Proudfellow
Prompt: "simple, easy, fun for all. :D Just anything gen with both of them or one of them."
Fandom: The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types
Characters/pairing: Gimli/Legolas Greenleaf; Aragorn, Legolas, Gimli
Prompt: "Third wheel Aragorn to Gimli/Legolas. During the quest Aragorn observes the new and blooming love between his friends but as they travel as the Three Hunters he has no one to talk about it. So he writes in his journal or in unsend letter to Arwen or just thinks before sleep (or any other form the author might come up with) about everything he sees happening between Legolas and Gimli."
AU prompt:
Fandom: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Character: Fíli
Prompt: "An AU in which Fíli survives Azog and Bolg's Durin killing spree and becomes the next King Under The Mountain. I welcome whatever other character inclusions that your heart desires, though not in a way that makes them the focus over Fíli. I would especially love Dís as King Mother and Balin or Dwalin as Closest Living Relatives."
Kinky prompts:
Fandom: The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types
Characters: Elrond Peredhel/Thranduil; Elrond Peredhel, Thranduil
Prompt: "Daddy/Doll - soft BDSM and Dollification. Elrond's got mad caregiving vibes, Thrandy in my canon is a hot mess constantly. Things don't work out for him because he doesn't have anyone to help him be soft again. Losing his wife turned him into a jerk. That protective steely exterior is pushing everyone away. Make Elrond tear it down! That man can make anyone sweet! Let's be real we all know Elrond is lonely too. He needs someone to love after losing so many people in his life, especially his wife."
Fandom: The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types
Characters: Gimli/Legolas Greenleaf; Gimli, Legolas, Thranduil, Elrond Peredhel, Glóin
Prompt: "Daddy/Princess - soft BDSM, BDSM lifestyle rules daily. It's finally time to come out to their parents about their relationship. How will this go over? Can they exist as a happy family and put aside racism? you decide! (We know at the very least Elrond genuinely can)"
Fandom: The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth
Characters: Annatar/Celebrimbor; Annatar, Celebrimbor
Prompt: "I would love something in which sub!Annatar teaches Tyelpe how to do shibari/rope bondage/predicament bondage, especially if they are playing on Tyelpe's scientific curiosity and desire to learn new things. Super bonus points if Annatar doesn't come."
Romance/relationship prompts:
Fandom: The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types, The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth
Characters: Elrond Peredhel/Ereinion Gil-galad; Elrond Peredhel, Ereinion Gil-galad, Celebrían
Prompt: "Just the High King and his Herald and an exploration of their relationship."
Fandom: The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power
Characters: Elanor "Nori" Brandyfoot, Halbrand
Prompt: "if anyone chooses to go there, I applaud you. :D Basically "what if Nori meets Halbrand and not The Stranger", and it goes decidedly NOT gen. Anything from cute one-sided crush to messed up dubcon is totally welcome, just please make sure Nori is an adult (by hobbit standards) if there's any sexual content."
Fandom: The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth
Characters: Eönwë/Sauron; Mairon, Eönwë
Prompt: "Something set in the Earliest Days of Arda (despite the Eonwe/Sauron tag... I guess that covers Mairon before he became Sauron too). Perhaps Mairon and Eonwe sneaking off together behind their Valar's backs when they should be working? Something a bit more innocent/playful - though an E or M rating is fine - but with hints of Mairon's awful personality peeking through."
#lord of the rings secret santa#lotr sesa#fandom event#lord of the rings#the hobbit#the silmarillion#the rings of power#prompt meme#holiday prompt meme#still looking for writers#looking for lotr: rop writers#looking for silm writers#ao3 exchange#signal boost#help the mods out#kink fic prompts#gen prompts#m/m prompts#fanfic#silm fic#lotr rop fic#deadline reminder#tolkien
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Weekly Tag Wednesday: holidays!
thanks to @mybrainismelted and @nymacron for the tags! <3
this week we are going to talk about your holiday traditions! hell yeah let’s go!! >:)
name: mi-AH😮💨
where in the world are you?
google the city where a meteor exploded in 2013. i kid you not, i got a chance to watch it through the window
what holiday do you and/or your family celebrate at this time of year?
i’ll go with new year. it’s celebrated basically like christmas in the us for example. back in the days we used to invite either some relatives (or go to them ourselves) but mostly we celebrated it with our family friends. now we don’t really celebrate it in a traditional way, but it’s only my mom and dad
does your family get together to celebrate?
kind of?? i mean, all of us just go out of our rooms to sit in the kitchen for an hour or so :’)
are there any traditional foods for the holiday?
salads. lots of salads. like google olivier salad. if done right, it‘s fucking amazing. and my mom does it right as fuck!!
do you typically decorate for your holiday?
we used to have a fake and small silver christmas tree but one time we brought a real one :’) and also some stuff here and there, like little snowmen or fake mistletoe
tell me about your favourite holiday memory:
i think i was about 6-7, my childhood friends came over which was HUGE for me, but the best part was the present my parents gave me. this (at the time it seemed huge) small fake kitchen for kids, like with over, plastic food, sink, literally anything! back then i was really into not really cooking, but making menus for an imaginary restaurant, so you can imagine how happy i was :’)
what is the significance of the holiday you are celebrating?
i think it’s letting go of things and oh boy do i have some stuff to let go of :’)
if there was one thing you could change about this holiday, what would it be?
pr*sident speech about the same thing over and over and over again
anything else you want to tell me about your holiday?
it was more fun when i was a kid. now it seems a bit depressing :(
aaaand im tagging… 👀
@callivich @spookygingerr @gallapiech @gardenerian @femboymilkovich
@dreamjupiter @atthedugouts @blue-disco-lights @stocious
@pookiebearmick @doshiart @deedala @energievie @thepupperino
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Maybe Christmas it’s not that bad
Pairing: Jenna Ortega X Reader I wrote it thinking of fem!reader but can be read as gn!reader
Word count: 3.35k
Summary: You end up spending Christmas with Jenna and her family.
Hi! This is my first time writing, so sorry if this is bad. Also, English is not my first language, so if you see a mistake, please let me know.
A/N I know it's too late (or early) for a Christmas fic, but this idea popped in my head and I had to write it. Hope you enjoy it!
You look at the Wednesday cast. You can’t contain the small smile that appears on your face when you see them all laughing and having a good time, chatting about their plans for the upcoming Christmas holidays. Your eyes land on Jenna, like they tend to do. You love seeing her like this, so relaxed and carefree.
Suddenly, you feel a hand on your shoulder, seeing Emma with a smirk looking at you. "What are your plans for the holidays y/n/n?" Your smile disappears after hearing the words, without much of an idea of what to answer. "Hmm, not much, just a nice and calm dinner with some friends." The lie rolls easily, and you’re happy that she doesn’t ask anything else before going back to talk with the rest.
See, the thing is, you don’t really like Christmas. You loved it when you were a kid, with all the gifts and special foods. But when you started to grow up things changed. Your parents didn’t get along really well with your other relatives, so dinner with the rest of the family was always filled with uncomfortable tension. You were forced to talk with people that basically didn’t care for you, just to keep the happy little family facade that everyone knew was fake, so your parents would be happy. It was exhausting. Plus, your economic situation wasn’t good, so you stopped getting presents at the age of 10. In the end, Christmas started to feel like an obligation. Seeing everyone be so excited, knowing that they had a good time with their families just added an extra bittersweet feeling. It made the longing to experience something like that stronger, and you hated it.
You excuse yourself, too distracted thinking how you will be all alone again, to notice how Jenna looks at you with a frown. You close the door to your trailer with a sight, ready to take a shower and go to bed, wanting nothing more than to have a little bit of peace. Right as you get out of the bathroom you hear a knock on your door. "I’m coming." You yell, a little confused as to who it could be. When you open the door you see Jenna and Emma. "Come in." You say while opening the door a little more.
Once the three of you are seated on the couch you wait for one of them to start talking. "We wanted to talk with you about earlier. We noticed how you felt a little uncomfortable after asking you about Christmas. Just wanted to make sure you’re ok." Emma says softly. "I’m fine, just a little tired." " Y/n, don’t lie to us please. There’s something bothering you. If you don’t want to talk about it it’s fine, we were just worried." Jenna tells me.
You stay silent for a minute, thinking if you want to tell them the truth. They already know a few things about your past, but they don’t know the whole story. In the end, you decide to tell them. You exhale before starting. "You know I don’t have contact with my family anymore. But, the truth is, I don’t really talk with anyone else apart from you. I didn’t have a lot of friends back home, and I’ve been so focused on Wednesday, I haven’t had a lot of time to meet new people. My plan was to stay here. I don’t really like Christmas, so I don’t mind if I don’t celebrate it." You shrug trying to play it down.
After you tell them how were your Christmas before cutting the ties with your family, they share a look of understanding before Emma starts speaking. "Well, there’s no way we’re going to let you stay here alone for the holidays. We can talk with our families and we can stay here with you. Make it special so you can finally have good memories of it." "What?" You say shocked. "No way. I’m not letting you stay here just because of me. You haven’t seen your families in months, and I know how excited you two were to see them again. I will be fine, I promise." You say crossing your arms to emphasise how serious you were. "If you’re not going to let us stay here and we’re not going to let you stay alone, I think the only solution is for you to come with one of us." Emma nods to Jenna’s words.
You think about it. It would be nice to spend the holidays with people, and you already met Emma’s family through a video call a few months back. But still, you don’t want to be a burden. "Y/n, please." Emma gives you puppy eyes and you can feel your resolution crumbling. "Ok, ok, if your family is ok with it, I will go with you." You say. "Oh please, my mom fell in love with you since the two of you met. She will be happy to have you over." "And, if not, you can always come with me." Jenna adds with a smile.
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The next morning, while you’re in makeup, Emma comes to speak with you. "Hey y/n. I’ve talked with my mom about you tagging along for Christmas." "Uh, ok? Did she say yes? That’s why you’re grinning like the Cheshire cat?" You ask a little confused. "Unfortunately, we will have more family than expected, so you can’t stay." "Oh, ok. There's no problem. I will just stay here." "Oh, you won’t. You will stay with Jenna." "What? I’m not going with her Emma, I don’t know her family!" You say a little panicked. "Too late. I’ve already spoken with her and she said there’s no problem for you to go with her. I’m sure you will have a lot of fun." She says winking at you. Before you can think of an answer, Emma has already left the room. What the hell? You think before realising what just happened. Emma knew about your crush on Jenna, so she framed you to spend the holidays with her. I’m going to kill her when we finish the show.
You spend the rest of the day nervous. There’s just a couple of days before the holidays start, and you don’t think you’re ready to be at Jenna's house. "Hey, you’re ok?" Jenna asks you. "You’ve been a little distracted today." "If I’m being honest, I’m really nervous about Christmas." "Why?" "Well, I don’t know your family. What if they don’t like me?" You say scratching your neck. "Y/n, don’t worry, they will love you." She gives you a reassuring smile before talking with you about the details of the trip.
The rest of the days fly by and before you know it, the day of the trip comes. You and Jenna spend the whole trip making plans for the holidays, since there’s still a week left until Christmas. Jenna tells you a little bit more about her family, and by the time you get to her house door, you feel you’ve known them for a long time.
Her mom is the first to hug Jenna, while you step aside not really knowing what to do. As soon as they separate, her mom comes and hugs you too. "It’s so nice to finally meet you, Jenna won’t stop talking about you!" Both of you blush while Jenna whines "MOM! Stop it!" After the introductions, you look around the house. It’s nice and cosy, with the Christmas decorations filling the hallways and the living room. The tree hasn’t been decorated yet, waiting for the whole family to be together.
Before showing your room, Jenna shows you hers. It’s smaller than you imagined it. Just a double bed, a desk and a built-in wardrobe. On the wall above the desk, there’s a corkboard full of photos of Jenna with her family and friends, movie tickets and other different items. "It’s my memory board. I used to save things of special moments and then I would pin them on the board." Jenna explains when she sees where your eyes are. You get a little bit closer, looking at everything with intent eyes. You love the idea that a lot of Jenna’s important moments are present on the board.
You point to one of the photos of her with her siblings, all of them making funny faces. "What was happening here?" She chuckles before answering "That was our second easter with the twins, they wouldn’t stop crying so we started to make funny faces so they would laugh. Dad thought it was really cute and snapped the photo without us knowing it." You smile, imagining the scene. You spend a little more time talking about the different photos before deciding to take a nap before dinner.
Dinner is great. Her parents are really good cooks and all her family is really easy to talk with. You spend the whole time laughing at the banter of Jenna’s siblings, loving the happy atmosphere of the house. After you eat, they decide it’s a good time to decorate the tree, so you all move to the living room. You sit on the sofa with her parents, watching with a smile how the siblings argue about which decoration they should use. At one point, Jenna gets on top of Mia, trying to steal one of the ornaments that Isaac has. You laugh, before taking a picture, an idea for Jenna’s present forming in your head.
Jenna comes to you after giving up, a soft smile on her lips. "Come on, you have to decorate the tree with us." She says while offering her hand to you. You take it, loving the warm feeling spreading through your chest, joining the siblings. Without you knowing, her mom takes a picture of you.
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The next morning, you two decide to go for a walk, so Jenna could show you her favourite spot in the city. "What do you think about my family?" "They’re great Jenna. I love how all of you interact. Especially you with your siblings." "Really? They can get really annoying when they want, which is always. If you haven’t realised, we spend the whole time bickering." "I think is really cute. It shows how much you care for each other." You say with a smile. Jenna looks at you, her eyes curious. "What?" "Nothing, I just… I would love to see the world through your eyes." "Why? It’s not that interesting, I just see what others see." You say without understanding her.
Jenna drops the subject, guiding you to a hidden spot beside the road. It’s covered by trees, but once you pass them, you can see a bench facing a cliff. "Wow, it’s beautiful." You say. From where you stand, you can see the city below, surrounded by the desert. You sit down, enjoying the comfortable silence.
After a few minutes, Jenna starts talking. "Can you tell me a little more about your childhood? I know you don’t like to talk about it, but I’m curious." "What do you want to know?" "What was your favourite thing to do?" You think for a couple of seconds before answering. "I loved watching movies in the dark, I would wrap myself in a blanket and sit on the floor with the lights off. I could spend hours that way." "That’s so cute! I used to do blankets forts with my siblings and watch movies inside." "I always wanted to do that." "Wait, you’ve never built a blanket fort?" Jenna asks you a little shocked. "No, I always watched it in movies and I thought it look really fun, but I never had the chance to try it." "What else you’ve always wanted to try?"
You two spend a couple more hours talking before heading back to the house.
For the next few days, you pass the time with her family, playing games in the garden with her siblings, helping her mom cook and getting to know Jenna a little more. You also took a lot of photos for Jenna’s present. You were thinking of creating an album, including photos since the two of you met until Christmas.
It was December 22, and the family decided to go shopping for Christmas gifts (I know it’s too late, but imagine you can buy them without a problem) You were talking with Markus when you see Jenna looking out the window of a jewellery store. There, in the front, was a beautiful necklace of a raven with his wings opened, a small blue stone on his beak. You know Jenna has had a little obsession with ravens since she started Wednesday, so you make a note to yourself to come back later and buy it.
You all end up separating so you could buy the presents for everyone. After a few hours, you only needed to buy the photo paper and the necklace for Jenna. You had talked with her dad a few days ago, and he let you use his printer for the photos. Once you got everything, you go back to the house, hiding the gifts in your room before anyone could see them. You decided to have a quiet evening, a little tired from socialising so much this past days.
You’re just scrolling through Instagram when Jenna knocks on your door. "Hey, you’re busy?" You look at her, noticing how she seems excited. "No, I was just being lazy, you want something?" "I have a surprise for you." Jenna leads you to the living room. When you enter, you see that the sofas have been moved, so there was space for a blanket fort. "You told me you always wanted to try it. I know you haven’t made it, but they can be a pain in the ass to build sometimes, and I wanted it to be perfect." You smile at her, your eyes shining with love. "Thank you, you didn’t have to." You say with a soft voice. You enter the fort, seeing all your favourite snacks and Jenna’s laptop already prepared for a movie marathon. You stay there, curled at Jenna’s side, until late in the night.
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The last day flies by, and Christmas Eve arrives. You spend the morning in your room, wrapping the gifts, only having to finish Jenna’s present. You sort the photos in an album on your phone, adding the ones her parents took for you, before deciding which ones you want to use. You decided that you would put the photos in a box instead of an album so if Jenna wanted, she could save them in her corkboard. After you print them, you put a nice decorative paper inside the box. But, you’re not quite happy with it, it’s like something is missing. That's when an idea pops into your head. Jenna told you she wanted to see the world through your eyes, so you decide to write what was going on in your mind when the photos happened.
The dinner that night is awesome. It’s the best Christmas you ever had, and you can’t wait for tomorrow. "Oh, we forgot to tell you!" Jenna says when you are finishing. "We usually open the presents when the clock strikes midnight." "Yeah! we can’t wait until the next morning. Too much excitement!" One of her sisters adds. You smile, before reassuring them that it’s ok.
You all get the presents and take a sit in the living room. Her parents are the first to give them, loving to see their children's excitement. You cry when you open your gift. It’s nothing special really, just a few hoodies from your favourite artists, but your chest feels like it’s going to explode from happiness, so you thank them sniffing, with a huge smile on your face.
After a while, it’s Jenna’s turn. She gives you two presents, one is a rectangle, and you immediately know it’s a book. The other is a small box. "Open the big one first." Jenna instructs you. You unwrap it carefully, seeing the cover of your favourite book. "It’s a special edition. I know how much you love it." When you open it, you can see that some pages have artwork on them. You want to thank her, but she shushes you before nudging the second present.
When you open the box, you can’t fight the tears that start to fall. Inside, lays a silver bracelet with an infinity symbol in the middle. It’s exactly like the one your Granny gave you. Your grandmother was the only person in your family that you really loved, and that bracelet was the last present she gave you before she died. You told Jenna how you loved it, but unfortunately, the bracelet broke a few years ago, and you really missed it. Jenna knew how important it was for you, so she search everywhere until she found it. "I know it’s not the same but-" Before she can finish, you hug her. "It’s perfect, thank you."
You clear your tears before giving your gifts. You’re nervous, you want them to be perfect as a thank you for giving you such a good Christmas. Everyone likes them, thankfully, so you relax a little bit. You look at Jenna, wanting to see her reaction. You just give her the necklace, wanting to give her the photos when you two are alone. A gasp leaves her mouth when she sees it. "I know you’re a little obsessed with ravens lately, and I saw you looking at it that day." You say as an explanation for the gift. "You know, some people believe ravens give bad luck." She tells you with a playful smile. "Sometimes, but to others they symbolize rebirth and starting anew, serving as a positive sign. I think that belief fits better for you." She smiles, before asking you to help her clasp the necklace.
You all stay talking for a while, before her family decides to go to sleep. It’s getting pretty late, but you ask Jenna to stay with you. "I have another gift for you." You tell her when she gives you a puzzled look. You give her the box, nervous about her reaction. When she opens it, she finds a little card
I hope this helps you to
see the world through my eyes
She lifts the decorative paper, seeing all the photos, each one with a number on them. She takes the first one. It’s a selfie of you two. You took it after the first day you two met. "Turn it around." You tell her in a soft voice, not wanting to change the soft atmosphere.
I knew since that moment that you were going to be one of the best things in my life. You were the first person to really see me. You didn’t judge me, or force me to talk, you just stayed close and waited for me to come to you. You brought a happiness into my life that I never thought I would have. Thank you.
She whispers your name after reading it, tears already forming in her eyes. She looks at you, before looking back at the box. You never stop looking at her while she reads them all, taking both of you on a trip of your relationship. The one where the cast of Wednesday fills the space, with smiles on your faces after the first week of shooting; Jenna with her siblings decorating the tree; Jenna hugging you from behind, with her arms on your hips, watching the tree after decorating it; you giving Jenna a piggyback ride in her back yard…
When she finishes reading them, she looks back at you, with a look of adoration in her eyes. You stay like that for a while, neither of you wanting to break the moment, before she grabs your cheeks and gives you a soft and chaste kiss on the lips. "Is this ok?" The words get stuck in your throat, so you kiss her softly again, a smile on both of your lips.
Maybe Christmas it’s not that bad
#jenna ortega#jenna ortega x reader#jenna ortega x fem!reader#jenna ortega x y/n#jenna ortega x you#jenna ortega imagine#jenna ortega x gn!reader
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Urgent Call: Help Tareq & Dana to Evacuate Gaza
Please consider donating to their gofundme.
Here is there story:
Please read the following statement from my cousin in Gaza sheltering in the church. I pray you can help some of my family members living in Gaza. -Luna Saba Tarazi
Urgent call: Help Tareq and Dana Saba to evacuate Gaza & start over
Introducing us:
My name is Tareq Saba, I am 30 years old, a Christian Palestinian. I have lived all my life in Gaza and I have been working as a project coordinator in the humanitarian health field at Caritas Jerusalem in Gaza for the past 5 years.
A life that we have dedicated all of our efforts to build despite the difficulties and obstacles in Gaza has suddenly changed overnight. After October 2023, everything has changed, and a lot has been lost. It seems that a life within these walls is now impossible.
In the following lines you will learn of our story which after you read, we humbly hope you will lend us your helping hand to start anew.
In a warm day on May 2022, Dana and I got married surrounded by our family and friends. We built and designed our house with love and attention to detail. We had a peaceful life and a wonderful home. We had many dreams for our future together, and we dreamed of having a child to fill our lives with joy.
Our story and the impact of the war on our family:
Nothing remained the same after October the 7th. We learnt the meaning of loss as we lost everything we hold into. We lost our house, our jobs, our “normal��� lives, and our dreams and aspirations.
One day we received instructions to evacuate our house. We evacuated with only a small bag containing our important papers, some clothes, and a small amount of money. Soon after it got heavily bombed and turned to rubbles of memories. We didn't know that we would never return to the place that held our dearest memories. So yes, we lost everything from the largest details to the smallest ones. And we went through terrible situations that I never thought I would ever experience.
It has been over 150 days since we sought refuge at the Church of St. Porphyrius in Gaza, which was not spared from shelling. We survived death several times!
Every day is harder than the one before. We fear for our lives due to the lack of basic necessities such as water, food, electricity, medicine, and more. Even the water is contaminated, and diseases and epidemics have spread everywhere.
My wife, Dana, was pregnant when the place where my family and I were staying in was targeted by a missile. We remained under the rubbles until we were miraculously rescued. All members of my family, my parents and close relatives, were injured and were transported to the hospital despite the difficulty of access during the shelling, but nothing beats the heartbreak I felt when my wife was injured and we lost our unborn baby.
Many of our relatives and friends were killed in this inhumane and unjustified shelling. Only a few of our belongings, lost under the rubble, were recovered. Now even our only “safe” refuge was targeted, and we have no other shelter!
I always imagine my baby as a boy while Dana insists they will be a girl but it doesn’t matter, I only prayed they will turn out healthy and safe, but yet again even these prayers were brutally snatched from our hands in front of our eyes and we couldn’t do anything, that’s how helpless I felt when we lost our unborn baby. It is said that the stress, fear, lack of nutrition, contaminated water, and phosphorus caused the miscarriage.
We had suffered a miscarriage before, but the pain doesn’t cascade by time, for months we lived through depression. The night we spent under rubbles was a miraculous night, it was impossible to survive under the unforgiving pressure of ruins and then reach the hospital under the heavy bombing but we did and Dana went through a surgery and received treatment.
Our house was targeted and destroyed by more than one missile, making it unfit for habitation. It was the dream house that we worked hard to own and design as we dreamed. It became ruins! These are some pictures of the house.
It takes one to see death eye to eye to realise the beauty of life. We felt at any moment that we would die, intensifying the reality that our children deserve to live in a place where they don’t wake up everyday to the fear of death and all their demands are met.
Dana and I are now back to square one. We lost all the savings of a lifetime and everything we owned in this war. I spent over $80,000 to build and design the house. Currently, the dream house is destroyed, our belongings, clothes, even our memories and beautiful moments were stolen from us. Gaza itself has changed forever, we lost streets, houses, shops, universities, hospitals, and our workplaces.
We have almost lost hope, but I believe that we should not despair. With your help, we can succeed. We can stay alive and provide a decent life for my family in a better place. Honestly, this is a real struggle that no one should have to go through.
How your fund will help us start anew:
Your donations will give our family the motivation to work hard for a fresh start. We have managed to obtain a temporary visa to Australia, and we pray that, with your generosity and assistance, we can raise the necessary funds to leave Gaza.
$10,000-12,000 for coordinating the exit through the Rafah border crossing in Egypt.
$5,000 for accommodation expenses in Egypt until departure to Australia.
$6,000 for plane tickets to leave Egypt.
The remaining amount will be used once we arrive in Australia to cover basic expenses such as housing, furniture, food, clothing, and other necessities until I can secure a job in Australia.
We know that no one can predict the situation in Gaza. If we cannot travel, whether due to lack of funds, travel risk, or change in accessibility, then we will use the funds collected to meet our needs and rebuild our lives here.
Dear friends, we only share our true personal story, and we hope and believe in your support. Every donation, no matter how small, can make a profound difference for us. Our only request remains peace, security, and safety, without fear, doubt, or disappointment, and that tranquility fills our hearts and we have a better future.
Whether you donated or not, it is a blessing to know someone out there cares enough to know your story, so Thank you for your time. Keep us in your prayers.
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I have two best friends.
Which is not an apt description.
Best friends is too small a term to describe what they are to me.
Chosen family. Ride or die. People I would drop everything for if they needed me. People I would protect with my last breath. People who know embarrassing details they will take to the grave.
Now that my mom and dad are gone, they are my lifelong companions. I trust them with my life.
I talk about Katrina all the time. But I tend to keep my friendship with Delling a little more private. I don't love either of them any more or less. There is no ranking system for my besties. But Katrina and I are basically like an old school comedy duo, so we have a lot more shenanigans to share. Shenanigans are easy content for a blog.
Delling is disabled like me. We have a lot of the same consequences from our health issues. Extreme fatigue most of all. Delling was unable to get disability benefits though, so they have to work a 9 to 5 job. And it exhausts them to the limit. They often will work and go straight to bed. If it were possible, I would talk to Delling every single day like I do with Katrina, but circumstances don't always allow for that.
So we have less shenanigans, but the same amount of love.
I'm also a little more protective of Delling at the moment. They are trans and for some reason a large portion of the "very online" people have decided to hate my best friend. And sometimes I worry about drawing attention towards Delling from the few trolls who still hate follow me.
Delling is almost always in my thoughts when I write about trans issues or argue with transphobes on Twitter. But I refuse to invoke "I HAVE A TRANS FRIEND" most of the time. For one, I don't advocate for trans people just because I have a trans friend. Though it does make the emotions I feel very intense sometimes. A lot of tears and anger. But I also don't want to sound like those conservatives who justify everything they say because they have a friend from a marginalized group.
There are certainly times people will be like, "Why would you mutilate someone and cut off healthy breasts??" and I wanna be like "Delling is much happier without boobies and I can see a huge difference since their surgery and you don't know what the fuck you are talking about with that mutilation nonsense. FIGHT ME!"
But I don't think I need to announce my bestie's private top surgery details just to win an argument on Twitter.
I'm just really happy for them and I am glad it helped. They struggled to get the surgery for so long and fought like hell to make it happen. People acting like it is this horrible thing make me so angry. When it finally happened it was... a relief. A weight lifted off their shoulders... err... chest.
After my dad died, Katrina was unable to get away from Florida to help me out. She was dealing with her disabled dog, Lucy, and her end-of-life care. That just isn't something you can ask someone else to look after for a few days. So Delling got permission to do remote work and drove down from the top of the country to help me. They came on the weekend of my dad's service and stayed a few days after to help me get the house sorted.
I'm honestly not sure I could have made it through that experience on my own. During the service, Delling just clung to my side as I tried to act normal when long-lost relatives offered similar grief platitudes over and over. And I kept introducing Delling and saying they were from the wrong state for some reason. I do actually know where Delling lives, but I guess my brain was not functioning in that situation.
Delling also helped me finish my eulogy literally hours before I gave it. And they helped me print out a bunch of photos of my dad that almost no one looked at. I'm so glad we spent all morning frantically doing that. *sigh* Though I'm hoping the photos will come in handy when I do an online memorial for my parents, so it was not all for naught.
There was a moment when a certain someone gave an impromptu speech at the end of the service about how she let my dad see his granddaughter for a couple of hours a year ago and how special that was, and Delling tightly squeezed my hand to help channel away my anger.
Ya know, those totally normal *yearly* visits all grandpas get to have.
Sometimes friends just know, ya know?
Delling and I also revamped the kitchen for my needs, which I have already turned into absolute chaos. And we had a fun shopping trip to Sam's where I bought tender beef jerky that was the toughest to chew jerky I've ever experienced. I guess the "tender" on the label was sarcastic.
All I know is that casually shopping with my friend was this beautiful bonding adventure where we just got to hang out and be together. It's weird the experiences that stick with you. Trying to pick out wholesale sushi with my bestie will be a treasured memory for the rest of my days. And I think that is kinda perfect in its simplicity.
There are not enough thank yous in the world for what Delling did for me. I wish they could have stayed a few months instead of a few days. I miss having them here in person. But they had a foster bunny to take care of and a job and a family. So I had to give Delling back to the top of the country.
I just wanted to write this in appreciation of my other best bestie. I love them more than anything. And I can't tell you all how special it feels to have someone who will drop everything, drive across the country (through tornado weather, no less), and keep you company during a very lonely time.
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My entire life, I've yearned for the kind of community the Jewish community and Judaism have provided me. I found out I had Jewish ancestry when I was a kid, I looked into it more later and realized my most recent Jewish ancestor (like three-ish generations back) was almost certainly forcibly converted out, and decided to convert to like. Make amends for that I guess and also because I really vibed with the holidays and how we turn up everywhere in history bc we keep doing cool stuff despite consistently shitty circumstances.
But I digress.
I have waited my WHOLE LIFE trying to experience the joy becoming Jewish has shown me, and that gets shit on constantly.
My sister has started making a truly obscene number of Jew jokes. My mom scoffs at all the 'nonsense rules' and has said repeatedly that she thinks choosing a 'restrictive' religion is dumb and I've made a mistake. She even said it's an insult to HER parenting skills that I would seek out religion after she tried to teach me to know better.
My dad is dead but I never ever in a million years would have told him even if he were alive, and my sister thinks it's funny to threaten to 'out' me as Jewish to his relatives even though they're basically KKK-adjacent so she actually enjoys threatening mg safety at this point. (Yay family right?)
My friends have turned everything into an Israel/Palestine discussion lately and I know damn well what they're doing when they start saying truly horrible shit about Israelis and looking at me. They get mad if I try to temper their extremism so I've given up. I barely talk to them anymore and I spend more and more time with other Jews from temple and I don't want to like. Isolate myself from all non-Jews I guess bc I've always felt like that leads to weirdness and perpetuates shit about Jews being unfriendly I guess idk?
Anyway I digress again. My point is I'm really sick of constantly being expected to tolerate it when people think I shouldn't be Jewish.
Other queer people think I'm somehow compromising my queer identity by being Jewish, leftists think I hunt Palestinian children for sport now apparently, right-wingers think I traffic good Christian babies for organ harvesting or some shit idfk, my friends think that if I'm not being more vitriolic in my hatred of Israel than they already are I'm some kind of secret rabid Netanyahu fan, my family think I've been recruited into a cult apparently and the only other people who show me even an ounce of compassion or regard are other Jews and Gd knows there's like ten of us and that number is unlikely to increase.
Just. Fuck. I've put blood, sweat, tears and money into this, I invested more time and emotional commitment into this than I have into going to college or choosing a career, I love it more than anything and have only loved it more the more I learned about it, and all I get when I express this or even just let slip that I am Jewish and chose to be, I get nothing but hatred. I will never understand how a religion that has spent all 5000 years of our existence minding our business and arguing about the same book over and over can possibly have offended this many people with our existence.
Dmn anon, that is a lot you're dealing with right now. I'm so sorry you're surrounded by people who clearly don't respect you. Because yes this is a lack of basic respect, and it is antisemitic. Now I don't know how old you are and how safe you are, but if you can safely do so, set very hard boundaries. Do not tolerate this amount of disrespect towards who you are. It is hard, and many of us have had to go through similar situations, as you can read all over this blog. But I think having to spend your life surrounded by people who make you feel unsafe and disrespected is worse. I know sometimes there are situations in which people cannot safely set these boundaries, I hope it's not your case, but if it is feel free to come here to vent again.
I know you don't want to isolate yourself from goyim. Many Jewish people don't want to. Sadly, when people disrespect us like this, they're the ones isolating us. It's not your fault. Seek people who love and accept you. Sadly, a good chunk of goyim won't - I'm not saying everyone, obviously, but a portion. Having a good Jewish support network seems to be more and more important, whether it's irl or online.
I hope you can soon be in an environment that's safer and more accepting
- 🐺
#jewish vents#antisemitism#leftist antisemitism#jewish convert#i feel like i need to clarify#while i said that a good portion of goyim are disrespectful and antisemitic#i dont mean every goy is#so if someone is coming in the comments to call me goy-phobic i assure you i do not have the patience to deal with that#i mean what i said#thats not an attack on goyim#its just an observable truth stated by literally every jewish person I've ever spoken to#if you feel offended at being called antisemitic try not to be antisemitic#like im sorry i sound so mad but i am just very tired of seeing my community suffer while everyone else just looks the other way
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AITA for making my fiancee do extra flights to pick me up and drop me off again?
For context, I'm 24M and my fiancee is 26NB. I'm disabled and can't fly alone because of it, though to be honest even if I was able-bodied I likely still wouldn't be able to due to also having AvPD.
We're in a long-distance relationship - I live in Scotland, and she lives in Indiana, USA. We've met up several times before, all of which were her flying out to visit me with me paying for all of her flights and our accommodation etc. We began to talk about moving in together and getting her a Visa to live here, but her family understandably said they wanted to meet me first (she still lives with her parents), so I agreed that before focusing on any of that I would visit her there for a few weeks as well to meet her relatives and let her show me around like I had with her.
Since I'd paid for all of her visits here, the agreement would be that she'd pay for my flight there this time. However at the time I made it pretty clear that if I couldn't find anyone to go with me (which was doubtful from the beginning as all of my family work full-time and I don't have many IRL friends who'd be able to travel with me for weeks at a time) it would be a case of "either I have to get picked up or I can't go at all". She agreed to this and said she'd be fine with doing that as long as I paid for those flights, which I was more than happy to do as they're a favour/accommodation for me.
To try and ease the pain-in-the-ass'ness of her having to do an extra trip out here and back just for me, we arranged for her to stay here with me for a week before and a week after so it's not a case of her getting off a plane, grabbing me, and getting on another plane and she can have a break. Accommodation is all sorted for that and everything already which I'm paying for as well. Everything's been booked and she seemed totally fine with this (beyond some understandably minor grumbling about how annoying and tiring it'll be to do the extra flights which like, fair, it will be).
However, after the tickets were booked, pretty much everyone she knows blew up at me over those extra flights. As far as I'm aware her parents/friends knew that's what we'd need to do, but I guess were holding out hope I'd be able to get someone to come with me, which unfortunately I wasn't (and trust I asked everyone I possibly could because I wasn't really looking forward to throwing out the extra £2k as a disabled person who can't work either), and now that it was confirmed my fiancee would have to be doing the extra trips they were really angry about her doing it.
Her parents have, for lack of a better term, gone completely berserk. Her mom has locked herself in her room, her dad came into her room while we were on call to scream that she wasn't going and that it made no sense, that if I couldn't fly by myself then they aren't going to let her move in with me either, they removed my name from their family signs and shit, it's a whole thing. They've basically completely frozen me out over these extra trips. I know at least one of her friends is also incredibly angry at me for 'making' her do it, and has told my fiancee something along the lines of "If I ever meet him I'll be sure to make him feel guilty for this" and as far as I know has actively said they hate me over it. Everyone is telling her to cancel the trip over it, which we can't do because we just spent thousands on non-refundable tickets (and which we don't want to do anyway!).
My fiancee was taking the "Why don't they understand you're disabled?" route to me but I was worried she was saying something else to them and that's why they were so angry, but I've double and triple checked with her that she's not actually secretly super against the idea, and she confirmed again that beyond her being a little annoyed about the extra time/effort it's fine and she's down to do it and that she understands why we have to do it this way. I've apologised over and over because I KNOW it's complicated and annoying and inconvenient and if there was another way I could find I would love to take it. I've tried to do everything I can to make up for it, cover everything financially, give her the extra buffers of time before and after so it's not just a pick-up drop-off trip and is just like an extra visit here, I can't think of what else to do to make it better for her and everyone else.
But her family and friends' reactions have made me second guess everything like - is this more than just an annoying inconvenience? Am I being completely unreasonable by asking her to do it at all? It seems like everyone did a complete 180 on their attitudes towards me over it and it's making me wonder if it's actually way bigger than I can see.
What are these acronyms?
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Am I the a-hole for running away from home to avoid having to meet my relatives for Christmas?
I (12M) have never been able to smile naturally. I can force myself to with a bit of work, but it usually hurts a lot, so I'd rather not bother. Mom (40F) and Dad (38M) have always been understanding of that fact, as has my brother (12M), so normally it wouldn't be an issue. However, Mom comes from quite an esteemed family, which is accordingly very strict about our conduct. That I can't just plaster on a perfect, friendly face all the time, is a source of frustration for Mom's siblings, especially two of whom I will call Uncle G (42M) and Aunt K (45F).
The last time I saw them for Thanksgiving, G pulled me aside into the kitchen and threatened to carve my face up with the knives there if I didn't smile, because it was a celebration and we should be happy, and me not smiling brought down the mood. And then, when K caught me not smiling later (because I needed to rest my face), she threatened to pour boiling water on me so as to teach me a lesson about obeying elders.
I'm scared they'll actually go through with it for Christmas, because we were all supposed to stay in one big lodge together for a week, and I can't keep up a smile like that for such a long time. I never told Mom, Dad or my brother about it either, because according to our other uncle D (49M), who is the patriarch of the whole family and a super important politician so he's very wise, sibling relationships are really important. Telling Mom about it will make her argue with K and G, and maybe D as well, and it will ruin her relationship with all of them. And Dad and my brother would just tell Mom anyway.
So when I had just finished packing my bag, the night before we were to leave, a thought suddenly occurred to me. Everything I needed to survive the next few days was in the bag - my clothes, toothbrush, toothpaste, water bottle, etc. I could just leave. I thought about Uncle G and Aunt K, and what they would do to me, and, in a moment of impulse, took my bag and left while everyone else was sleeping. I snuck onto a train and made my way to my best friend S's (11F) house. Her mother, Auntie C (older than Mom, F) let me stay at her house for as long as I needed, and offered to call CPS, but I told her not to because Mom's family is important enough that calling the cops on them would probably result in the caller getting arrested instead.
So, right now, I'm with S, we're both officially having our first sleepover (that could potentially last forever) and it's really fun! We had a movie night, and also got to play video games, and I even got to help them make traditional desserts for the solstice (which may or may not have devolved into S and I flinging flour at each other and having to clean the kitchen after that). I'm really thankful that I left and came here instead. But, my parents and brother have apparently been really worried - they even called Auntie C asking if she'd seen me, but I begged her not to tell them so she didn't. We haven't seen any missing child posters go up yet, though that's probably because my relatives don't want people knowing the family managed to lose a child and isn't quite so picture perfect.
I know I should be ashamed of myself for making my family panic so much, especially since I managed to overhear that my brother has been really depressed since I left, so much that he keeps refusing to eat. And I do feel guilty! But going back will just lead to me getting shuttled off to the lodge and getting punished even worse than before. It's selfish, but I don't want to go home. I'm happy here, I'm happy that I left, which is probably why I'm TA. It's been weighing on me, and while S insists I'm NTA, I think she's biased because spending time with friends is fun. So, if anyone out there might offer a more objective view of the situation - AITA?
UPDATE: Basically I still got found anyway, but Auntie C and a few other family friends convinced me to tell my parents about what happened last time. I did, and now Mom has cut all contact with her family. And also G and K are actually getting arrested! Good riddance - I just found out that they had been really harsh to my brother too, and he also didn't tell anyone for the same reason as me. I'm honestly starting to wonder if D's emphasis on siblings might have messed up our entire family a bit...
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2 Demons 1 Angel. Chapter 12
Chapter 12. Dick: Further Interrogation
Dick
With Duke leaving the room, the atmosphere became frigid. Had Mr. Freeze escaped Arkham again? It felt like ice was creeping across the room, picking up the pace once Duke left.
That’s what I like about Duke, he was a light to this family who was in love with the dark. It’s fitting, because of his personality and abilities.
{We classify them as Meta-Humans or Metas for short, basically people who have enhanced abilities that received their powers either through experimentation or through blood relatives. Some examples would be my best friend Wally West, and his uncle Barry Allen. Both Barry and Wally recreated experiments that caused them to be hit by lightning and become the fastest people alive. Aliens don’t count as Metas. Like Superman or his family.}
Anyway, Duke has the ability to manipulate light and shadow. Using it to disguise himself easily. He also sees into the future… by about ten minutes at most. Bruce has always disliked Metas, refusing to have anyone with enhanced abilities, including Superman, into his city. He refuses their help, so Duke being apart of our family does demonstrate progress on Bruce’s part.
The tension in the air was humid and thick, though frost covered the walls. A storm was approaching, on the edge of a gale. Nothing but enraged words, and a downpour would come to our family. Though there’s always the eye of the storm, some hope. But once the eye passes, the storm hits twice as hard. Jason collapsed back into his seat; his hand covered his face. My little brother was not in the mood to talk anymore, utterly exhausted from recounting the horrific past. The only sunlight, hope, in the room was the truth that was being spoken. No hesitation, no lies, the only wait was due to glares, which made the frost spread like cobwebs across the once joyful room.
The weight of Jason’s words hit my heart. Abigail was treated as a weapon? Possibly abused worse than Cass or Damian? Cass who wasn’t allowed to speak, but instead learned how to communicate through body language. Cass, who didn’t speak till she was 15. Cass and Damian, who were trained as assassins from the day they could walk? Damian, who was taught loving someone made you weak? Damian, who would rather insult you and fall on a blade instead of asking for a hug? Damian, who was taught that he always must be perfect?
But not having a name… how? How could anyone live like that? How could Daniel live like that? How could Abigail?
I looked around the room, everyone seemed to be having similar thoughts to mine. Except for Daniel and B. Daniel was glaring at the hardwood, just letting the places of information fall into place, connecting the final dots to complete this story. Bruce? Bruce was glaring at Daniel and Jason. Right now, Bruce wasn’t the man who offered me a home after my parent’s murder. Or the man who took in an eleven-year-old Jason in from the streets, the man who gave Tim a home after his seeing his neglectful parents’ bodies in his former home, the man who gave Stephiane a chance to redeem her family name, the man who gave Cass a chance to learn to speak, the man who provided Duke a home after his parents were forceable over-dosed by Joker’s toxin, or the man who accepted his son assassin Damian. That he still had time to teach his son the good in the world. No Bruce was not acting like any of those men in the past.
Today, Bruce is acting entirely as Batman, and not being a diplomatic Batman either. Did Bruce’s diplomacy only come from Alfred? Typically, when Bruce questions people, aka interrogates, he keeps a mask of indifference on. The only change in that mask is glaring harder at certain pieces of information. Currently, Bruce decided to take the bad cop persona, instead of the indifferent cop.
I guess that makes me the good cop. Maybe I should break the ice, before we get to more sensitive topics. “Well, this sure explains a lot from the past.” I grinned slightly at my Robin, then towards Tim.
Daniel frowned. “What do you mean? Explains what?”
Daniel was still tense. He clearly has trust issues, considering what Damian and himself recounted, I can’t exactly blame him. Our whole family has trust issues. Well, Duke doesn’t, neither did Alfred. Daniel relaxed when he had some information about us. It wasn’t just him revealing the past, it allowed for the spotlight to go onto someone else for a while. Hopefully I can give him enough time to collect his thoughts again.
Tim frowned, “Are you talking about that DNA test I found not long after the gremlin came here?”
“TT, then Slade’s ex wife sent it to father trying to make me believe Slade was truly my father. The ruse only was effective for a maximum of 48 hours.” Damian explained.
Daniel sent a confused look to his ‘brother’. “Story? And can only one person please explain?”
Tim coughed into his fist. “Considering I found the information out; I’ll give the part of the story I contributed to.” Tim sat up fully, finally putting his empty mug on the table. Looking Daniel right in the eye. “Damian officially became a part of our family at ten. But he came here for a short visit when he was eight. I was still Robin at that time. Bat brought him to the cave; I was honestly excited to have a little brother. Then –“
“My reflexes kicked in. Mother ingrained the fact in my head that I must inherit the Robin mantel. My task was supposed to be to only eliminate Grayson. Todd, the Red Hood, was supposed to eliminate Drake, obviously you can see for yourself that didn’t work.” Damian explained. His explanation still made me cringe. I’m just thankful that Little D gave me a chance to show him the good in the world before he followed his mother’s orders like a mindless soldier.
Daniel raised an eyebrow in question, turning his attention to Tim. “You sure you didn’t get thrown in a pit? From the rumors about Red Hood’s early days alone I would have thought the only people to stand in Hood’s way would be Batman or Superman. Possibly the Justice League if Batman ever let outsiders into his city.”
I frowned, looking over to my little brother. Well, little in age. Considering the fact that Jason was several inches taller and had ruffly 30 or more pounds of muscle than me. Jason was glaring at the table, no doubt still lost in his traumatic past. Usually, these instances he would be thinking about Joker, the man who murdered him at 13. Joker hitting Jason with a crowbar, then letting him die in a warehouse explosion. I knew how to get him out of those thoughts, by acting silly and getting him to yell at me. At least it was better than him being stuck in the past. Now though? I couldn’t tell when he was in the past, getting the distinct impression some idiotic actions would not be able to bring my brother out of his dark past at the moment. For now, Jason has to fight his past torments on his own, despite how much I wanted to protect him.
Tim snickered. “No, I didn’t get thrown in the pit. I am actually one of the people in this family who hasn’t been in the pit. Or technically died. However, there was a short period of time when I was forced to work for your grandfather. My spleen was removed and there was about three minutes I truly thought I had been in the pit.”
I shudder at Tim’s words. Seeing Jason on pit rage was bad enough. Tim on Lazarus induced pit rage? That would be a nightmare. The Lazarus pit brings out the worst in a person and enhances time five. Jason was bent on revenge, taking up the name Red Hood, controlling the criminal element of the city by doing what Batman refuses to do, and to get some sense of justice for his death. If Tim was ever to go to the pit, … well it wouldn’t be good, especially with his intelligence. He would turn cynical, wouldn’t trust a single person, and would likely become the most feared vigilante in history. Yes, even more than Batman or Red Hood.
“Back on track. Mother sent me to learn from father at eight. I saw Drake as a threat, so I attempted to decapitate Drake.” Damian summarized.
“Yeah, well I’m glad that didn’t go according to plan.” Tim rubbed his neck self-consciously. “Not long after that Talia took Damian back. I began doing research, I wanted to prove that Damian wasn’t related to this family at all. I found an alternate DNA profile saying that Slade Wilson was Damian’s father instead.”
That incident was a nightmare. Damian had disappeared for less than a week. Leaving a note saying something like ‘I am going to go live with my real father.’ I’m glad that Bruce and Slade were able to work that mess out. I still despise Slade Wilson, aka Deathstroke. The most lethal contract assassin in the world. Although he is not above being paid off to not kill an assignment. One blue eye, the other is shot out (by his ex-wife), white hair, an expert with any weapon, prefers firearms and swords. When he was a teenager, he joined the military, Slade was drafted to be a part of scientific experimentation. Creating a super soldier.
“Which was disproven.” Damian assured.
“That alternate document was probably you. We just didn’t know it.” Tim looked at Daniel meaningfully.
“TT, at the time I thought mother had just planted it for a failsafe incase a contract was ever put on my head.” Damian explained. I could tell he was still slightly guilty for not following the lead in the first place.
“Apparently, you didn’t consider that your own mother would put a bounty on your head.” Jason said flatly. Still lost in his own thoughts.
Daniel frowned, obviously a thought occurred to him. I caught Barbara’s eye. I had a pretty good idea what was going to come out of his mouth, and Barbara was having similar thoughts. Daniel was probably going to accuse us of abandoning him. Somewhere along the lines, ‘You had evidence I was alive for almost seven years? And you didn’t look into it?’ To be quite honest we’d deserve it.
The question that came out of Daniel’s mouth was, “Were there other files?”
Tim frowned. “What do you mean?”
“When you discovered my DNA profile, did you find other files similar to mine?” Daniel asked again, mumbling to himself, refusing to look anyone in the eye.
“No, why?” Tim questioned.
Daniel grabbed a taco in front of him, obviously trying to avoid this part of the conversation. Tim looks over to me for help. See, Tim knows I know Damian the best. Heck, Tim preaches it. Tim was asking what he should do, because Tim doesn’t completely want to start off on the wrong foot like he and Damian did.
I looked at Daniel again, studying him closely. He is still guarded but, I could tell he wasn’t completely done with answering questions yet. Perhaps we can go back to the point of the files later.
I tapped a message in Morse code on my knee. Change Topic. He Will Still Answer Questions But Change Topic.
Tim nodded and picked the conversation back up again, looking over to Daniel. “Damian said that Abigail is blind yet can hear through echolocation. What did Ras do to her?”
Daniel sighed, placing his head in his hand. “Before I explain that, I need to explain what led to that.” Daniel combed his arctic-white hair through his fingers. Shutting his emerald, green eyes tight, and his left foot began bouncing out of nerves. “Abby wasn’t born blind. Jason tried to save Abby, obviously that failed.”
Daniel stopped himself, attempting to formulate what he should say next. Pinching his lips, eyebrows furrowed just a couple of centimeters from touching each other.
Jason grunted, though I am sure he was just awoken from his own thoughts. He looked at Daniel, protectiveness and sympathy radiating from him.
The white-haired boy put his hand on the back of his neck. “There were two other clones of Damian. And at least one of Abby herself. Ras allowed the four to… train together? I’m not completely sure why he let that happen. Dean, David, and Ruby. From what Ab’s has told me, well more like described in her own way, they managed to run away at some point.”
Stephanie looked at Daniel with sympathy. Seeing how hard it was to describe the part of Abigail’s past that he hadn’t been a part of. Her blonde hair pulled over her right shoulder, as if she was trying to provide a curtain between herself and the family portrait above the mantal. Feeling the ‘Look’ from Alfred’s painted face. “That’s why she saved you. Because you remind her of her other brothers.”
Daniel nodded. Hand dropping to his lap, strands of his near shoulder length hair falling in front of his face like feathers. “Yeah. The first time they ran away, they came across a photo booth. Ab’s still has the old picture. In the pic Abby looks about five, Ruby was probably six. Dean and David looked about eight.”
Tim started, “What does this-“
Daniel ignored him, lost in recounted memory, all the while relaying his words to his feet. “Abby said that Dean was taller than David. His hair looked like fire, stronger. Apparently, he was more impulsive, loud, and very protective of Abby and Ruby. David had hair like the earth or tree bark, listened, fast learner. He planned things. Yes, he was protective, but he wasn’t impulsive. Ruby was in-between. Ruby did think things through, but a bit impulsive. For Ruby, it was difficult for her to voice her emotions. Instead, she did little things to show she cared. Hair like the sun. Also defensive with her words.”
A silence hung in the air, Tim asked again, “What does this have to do with Abigail’s sight?”
Daniel stared Tim in the eyes. Living emerald forest green vs detective cold crystal blue. Two young men both determined, one in facts the other in defending his sister. “Everything. I’m sure you noticed how I described them.”
I nodded. “Yeah, fire red. Earth brown. Sun blonde.”
“That’s how Abby described them to me. She really doesn’t know colors. The only color she knows by name is green.” Daniel said, glancing over at me.
Barbara spoke. “You said Abigail was five while Ruby was six. Yet Ruby is a clone of Abigail.”
Daniel turned to her. “I also said that Abby has been to the pit’s innumerable times. Which caused her to look younger. My best guess is that she is at least two years younger.”
Bruce growled. “You still didn’t answer the question why do these other adolescent’s matter? Or the reason you dare, to address them before the sight of Talia’s daughter?” Bruce’s voice was mellow. However, the underlining hint of steely anger couldn’t be missed. A set of determination demanding every bone in your body.
Talia’s daughter, not Abigail, and surely not Daniel’s sister. Nothing, absolutely nothing but contempt for the girl who wasn’t even present. Daniel was calmer than before, but those words sparked his hatred. Daniel’s teeth clenched and he balled his fists uselessly.
Babs intervened before harsh words could be thrown around. “B, Daniel did answer Tim’s question. He said everything.”
“THAT’S NOT AN ANSWER!!” Bruce nearly screamed.
Daniel was on his feet, eyes ignited with fury and contempt, fists clenched. Jason followed Daniel’s actions, standing next to the boy in case things turned physical. Telling Bruce which side he was taking.
“The reason I brought them up?! Because they shaped Abby who is she is today! Jason gave Abby her name. They gave her a family. A family which was caught by Ras! Ras didn’t know Jason had given Abby a name!” Daniel laughed. The fire was still in his eyes, but he took a step back. Enjoying the moment of irony. His voice was dripping in sarcasm when he spoke again.
“The Demon’s Head. Ras Al Ghul. The man who knew everything. The man who had ears and eyes in every city of the world! The man who could have you killed if you so much said a bad thing about him. Didn’t know his most lethal weapon, his secret weapon. Had been given a name. He didn’t know that his other “Grandchildren” could possibly learn what a real family means. That they would teach his little secret weapon about family.”
Again, Daniel laughed. This time it sounded hollow and distant. The type of laugh that comes out when you are so emotionally bombarded you can’t do anything else. “To Ras these were flaws. Her name, family, everything wholesome she had been taught. For punishment, he threw Abby down in a cave. Chained, no light, no food, the only water coming from the cave itself. Just for having a real name.” Daniel breathed heavily.
Stephanie was on the edge of her seat. Looking horror struck at the punishment Ras had implemented on his own blood. Her mouth slightly open, distress filling her eyes, her hand was playing with her hair just to ground herself to reality.
I had a similar expression to Stephanie’s. My hands clenching the armrest beside me, gritting my teeth. Continuously sending glances to Barbara and Damian. A dam broke in my head, cursing out Ras Al Ghul in Romanian.
Tim had his back against the arm of the couch, feet towards Daniel. He was attempting to adopt a similar look to Bruce, trying shut down all emotions. However, Tim couldn’t quite disassociate himself from Daniel’s testimony. Worry crept into his eyes, glancing at our baby brother and Daniel, and recalling the trembling girl who had left the room, with Cass and Duke in tow.
Barbara was tense, shoulders set, her hand making her way to her pocket. Probably to warn Cass, but she wasn’t taking her eyes off Bruce. Glasses glinting, trying to gage the best course of action and how much more information should be revealed in this time frame.
Jason kept eyeing Bruce waiting for the elder to jump to his feet, waiting for any action that was more than minuscule from Bruce. His jaw was strained, holding back the river of curses he wanted to unleash upon Bruce, green becoming prominent in his teal eyes. Ready to protect Daniel if the need arises.
Damian was tense. He kept petting his Great Dane, Titus, for a distraction. His emerald eyes, matching Daniel’s in color, were lost in the past. As if Damian was recalling his own version of these events.
Bruce was glaring at Daniel. Not letting his thoughts show to anyone, as if he was a robot. I couldn’t see his tells for guilt. No absolutely no guilt for what he had heard Daniel say, no guilt for pushing him to say it. Bruce, just because this involves Ras does not mean you can act like you don’t have a heart. I ached for the old butler. Alfred would have put Bruce in his place already. If Alfred was here, Bruce wouldn’t be this closed off.
The amount of detail Daniel gave, and the reasoning as to why such actions were performed was unnerving. Everything seemed to be linked together.
Daniel took another step back. Ensuring the distance between himself and Bruce. His lids fell over his livid vivid green eyes. Fists clenching as if he should have had weapons in his hands, or he was preparing to throw a punch at Bruce’s face. “He left her down there till she was absolutely blind, probably longer than was necessary. At some point Ras injected Abby with something, I DON’T KNOW WHAT. Neither does Abby, so don’t ask. He didn’t exactly give us the luxury of knowing what torment he was going to do to us.” Daniel caught his breath, attempting to steel himself for the next part.
“What did it do to her?” I asked gently. His green eyes caught mine. Man, he looks so much like Damian. Even the expressions on his face. They were exactly the same on Damian when he was telling me his secrets when he was my Robin, and I was his Batman.
His eyes remained locked on mine, apparently finding some comfort in my eyes. Perhaps not comfort, but maybe for some reason I was able to keep him grounded to reality. “It caused her sight to change. She can’t see color. She sees through sound, using echolocation. And it did something to her voice, she has a scream that will leave your ears ringing. She can shatter glass with her voice and leave people temporarily deaf. The first time she did it to me, it was an accident, but I couldn’t hear for hours.”
Tim is right, she is literally a human bat.
Barbara spoke up, asking gently, “Daniel, what happen to Abby’s other brothers and sister?”
Daniel’s eyes shut tight, trying to block something out of his mind. He mumbled something, I frowned. I saw the words ‘escape, mountains, captured’ on his lips. I bit my lip before speaking. “The four of them, I am assuming after Abigail’s sight was changed, managed to escape to the mountains, but they were captured again?” I let my assumption hang in the air.
Daniel turned his head away from me. Jason put is hand on Daniel’s shoulder. He stiffened, but didn’t attack, a plus in my book.
Jason spoke for Daniel. “Daniel explained this part earlier. What you said was right, except for one part Dick.”
I frowned. “What did I miss?”
As I spoke Jason gestured for Daniel to sit down, which he did after a moment of hesitation, still glaring at his feet. Jason continued. “Abigail was captured. The others were killed.” Jason closed his eyes, letting some of his tension melt off of him as he breathed, then he sat down himself.
Bruce was about to speak again, no doubt something to make the situation worse, but Damian glared at him from his spot across the room.
Steph coughed into her hand. “So, Daniel, how did you and Abigail get to Gotham? And what exactly happened for you to meet Damian? Damian said you were stabbed? By whom?” Thank goodness for Steph’s short attention span, and her ability to still pick up on details.
Daniel looked up, his eyes losing some of their fire that previously occupied them. He drummed his left hand on his leg, the pattern made it appear as if he was counting to himself. “Abby and I stowed away on a cargo ship in Spain about a month ago. The ship itself arrived yesterday, but there were a lot more guards than I was expecting. So, we had to wait till night to even attempt getting off. We just managed to get off the dock, when we were caught.”
“What was the name of the cargo ship?” Bruce asked icily. Obviously wanting to verify if said ship docked yesterday, and to go over the security footage later.
“The MCS Tessa.” Daniel supplied, refusing to even look in B’s direction.
I frowned. I knew that the MCS Tessa was coming, I was working on the case with Jason. But it wasn’t supposed to be in for another week. Something about storms delaying her voyage. There was a dispute about who owned the ship though. Black Mask or Two Face. The two were about to go to war over the matter.
“Do you know who caught you?” Babs asked. Trying to keep her expression neutral. The mask may have fooled Daniel, however everyone else in the room knew she was hiding her curiosity. Wanting a new case, and where she could provide aid.
“A fat, weird bird looking man in a black suit and a piece of glass in one eye, the other an eyepatch. Carrying an umbrella and wearing a top hat.” Daniel described.
“Penguin?” Jason growled.
Penguin? The description is dead on to Penguin, since Jason as the Red Hood was the one to shoot his eye out. (Due to the fact it was Penguin’s fault that Jay’s dad was chucked in prison in the first place.) It wasn’t Penguin’s ship though why would he get involved with Two Face and Black Mask. Unless… he wanted a war. Penguin is a crooked businessman, and an opportunist and is currently desperate to get his empire back. A wicked combination in Gotham. He would take whatever was in the shipment, and both sides would accuse the other. No one would think Penguin would be capable of doing this because Red Hood toppled his empire, took it over for himself, and left Penguin with only one working eye. This is how Penguin wanted to get back in the game. Pit two sworn enemies against each other and reap the spoils of war.
Daniel frowned. “I’ve never seen a penguin before. Isn’t that a bird who can’t fly?”
“TT, yes. Oswald Cobblepot adopted the name penguin in his youth, due to his looks appearing similar to the bird. An insult to all the penguins of the world. From your description it sounds like Cobblepot.” Damian explained. A light in his eyes, wanting to teach his ‘twin’ about the birds themselves, but he managed to restrain himself.
Daniel shrugged. “If you say so. I wanted to fight but he had at least 20 hired hands, all with guns. I had no desire to die by a firing squad again. Somehow the weird bird guy, caught Abby using her as a hostage.”
His breath caught; his next sentence came out shakily, slight terror was embroidered in his voice. “I have heard what happens to girls in Gotham, I wasn’t letting that happen to my sister. I traded most of our weapons so he would let her go. But the man still stabbed me, then Abby got free. I think she broke the guy’s nose, and she grabbed our bags and helped me. His thugs must have been following us. I collapsed before we reached the alley, Abby dragged me the rest of the way. That’s when Damian intervened.”
Bruce growled out, “That ship isn’t due for another week! Penguin does not own the ship, so you couldn’t have met him last night! So how exactly did you get to Gotham?!”
“B, if you take the time to put your own feelings aside, like an actual detective, you could see the game Penguin is trying to play.” I spoke up.
Bruce stood, glaring at Daniel. Nothing but ill feelings towards the boy. How are you not seeing your own son within Daniel, B? Daniel’s telling the truth!
Jason got to his feet for a third time. Keeping Daniel behind him. His unspoken statement loud and clear, ‘this boy along with his sister are under my protection’.
Bruce began yelling. “This child has told nothing but lies! Obviously, Slade’s associates found him and the girl and has sent them to gain information!”
Bruce continued shouting, Daniel looked ready to protest, but I caught his eye. I shook my head, mouthing ‘Not now. Let us handle it.’
He didn’t look happy at my words, but he gritted his teeth and clenched his hands around the couch. Forcing himself to stay where he was.
‘Ping’. My phone, as did many other phones in the room, went off. I glanced at Bruce, making sure he was occupied in his rant, then I looked down at my phone.
(Golden Boy – Dick, Jay B – Jason, Mad Scientist – Tim, Blades – Damian, PPP – Stephanie, Hacker – Barbara, Light – Duke, B Bat – Cass.)
B Bat: Abigail is in the library, 3rd floor. She is letting Duke come up. ONLY. The only other person allowed to come is Daniel.
At least it seems Cass is making some progress with Abigail. I quickly silenced my phone then shot a message in the group chat.
Golden Boy: how is she with you?
B Bat: ok. Animals help. Kitty loves her.
Bruce turned his back on Daniel, facing me. I honestly lost track of his rant for the last five minutes. Had it been five minutes?
Bruce started at me, “You are so naïve to trust them! Just giving them the benefit of the doubt because he looks like Damian! You can’t wash the blood off an assassin’s hands!”
Oh, you’re playing that card? I spoke, “B, you are acting unreasonably. How on earth did you even get on this topic?!”
Bruce continued to rant paying no attention to my words. I saw Jason discreetly pass his phone to Daniel who was trying to look at the messages himself. Daniel did send a message himself, absorbed in the digital conversation.
I looked back at my own phone to see what I had missed.
Blades: understood. Do you think the dogs would be too much?
Light: I already have Ace. Would Titus be too much?
B Bat: for now, yes.
Jay B: has she eaten anything?
B Bat: not yet.
Jay B: Daniel here. Can you see if you can get her to eat?
B Bat: will try, won’t push.
I smiled, at least someone was making progress with these kids. Alfred the cat likes Abigail, Damian can work with her that way at least.
Hacker: don’t let her come here. B is on a rampage.
Rampage is an understatement.
Mad Scientist: agreed. We will let you know when he is better or away.
That means it’s going to be a couple of hours till then, it’s the middle of February, it’s already 5:30. Bruce will probably be heading out at 7.
PPP: if B goes on for another hour, I might just have to join you if I’m allowed to.
You and me both Steph. You and me both.
Light: reaching the 3rd floor now.
I turn off my phone, listening to Bruce’s rant. At least he is talking.
#batfam#respawn#dc comics#damian wayne#dc robin#jason todd#ocs#ras al ghul#original character#red hood#tim drake#barbara gordon#stephanie brown#bruce wayne#batfamily#dick grayson#duke thomas#cassandra cain
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for the game - phum 🤲
you said i should do all of them, which is insane, but also thank you weeeee ✨🫶
i'm gonna put the headcanons under the cut though, y'all can send asks with other characters (& emojis) from here
🏳️🌈 a sexuality headcanon
i personally definitely headcanon him as gay.
🏳️⚧️ a gender headcanon
a good ol' cis boy.
😇 a headcanon about their religion/lack thereof
hmmm... i'd imagine he's probably not religious, because he was shipped off from thailand at a really early age, and no one was socialising him and really involving him in the culture oversees either, so religion probably just kind of naturally passed him by. at this stage, i also can't imagine when he would discover it later in life on his own either.
🧸 a headcanon about their childhood
well 💀 horrors beyond our comprehension, basically. tbh, we know quite a bit about it, but just to solidify, i think 1) his parents and oldest brother genuinely never called to talk to him; 2) fang did call almost every day, but it got to this slightly weird juxtaposition of like "oh, you're calling me, but then if i start complaining about the horrific situation i'm in, you shut me down", so it wasn't Great, 3) the distant relatives he lived with did not care about him at all, it was truly unimaginable levels of neglect; 4) he had zero friends and the "i cried every day" thing was not an exaggeration.
👻 a headcanon about what scares them
well, we know about heights. for some reason, i also think darkness. that's if we're talking specifically classic fears. if we're talking more psychological - definitely fear of rejection and abandonment.
👽 a headcanon about a weird quirk of theirs
i do not think he sleeps with his plushies, that's not really their function. they are a comfort item during the day and also just a special interest on their own, as a collection.
💤 a headcanon about their sleep
i actually think he has a really hard time falling asleep, specifically because he isn't used to feeling safe, and that's also why he wakes up at the smallest sound.
🦾 a disability headcanon
autism in the biggest boldest letters.
💝 a headcanon about their love language
i'm gonna be honest, it's all of them equally. he is very acts of service, he starts driving peem around everywhere almost right away, he exchanges food with both peem and fang, so they wouldn't eat what they don't like. crossing over into gift-giving as well, he bought peem a bunch of seafood even though he doesn't eat it because they were at sea and peem would have wanted to eat it, he buys peem stuff all the time tbh, he pays for toey as well. quality time is also up there - he follows peem around everywhere and doesn't mind just sitting there in silence while peem works on his art. physical touch, of course, he can't stop touching and kissing peem. finally, words of affirmation, he is really good at compliments and just talking about how much he loves spending time with his friends etc. like i always say, his heart is the size of a skyscraper, and he has so much love to give.
🫂 a friendship headcanon
he still has a really hard time making friends and i think it will take him a long time to actually start hanging out with his new friends from peem's friend group separately and not when everyone is invited.
💔 an angsty headcanon
his self-worth is incredibly shakey, it's truly like a game of tumble tower, when you can see that it's gonna fall on the next player's turn. and i think that, though it will get better, especially if the family thing is resolved correctly, it will genuinely take decades to deal with it fully.
🪢 a headcanon about their family
his parents are gonna get hit by a bus that will be driven by someone who looks suspiciously like me :)
📓 a headcanon about their hobbies
i think he definitely has a hobby that involves a lot of reality-escaping. probably not video games, because i can't remember seeing a good pc/console at his apartment. i am leaning more towards books and/or movies/series, something like that.
👗 a headcanon about their clothes
he does not really care about fashion rip 😔
🔪 a headcanon relating to fighting/violence
unlike fang, i actually don't think he was ever that big into it. he ended up in a couple of fights anyway, because of fang, but he himself is very 👉👈
🌟 a headcanon about their desires/wishes
i think he wants kids, but is afraid he is going to make a terrible father, because he hasn't really had any good examples of parenting throughout his childhood.
🥇 a headcanon about what they’re best at
perhaps a slightly weird answer to a question that's probably leaning more towards skills and achievements, but i'm gonna say taking care of people. he is very attentive and loving, he is genuinely just incredibly good at the small gestures and remembering things about other people and giving the right gifts and saying the right thing at the right time, etc. etc.
🍫 a headcanon about food
he eats a very limited amount of food, which is also why fang can only cook spaghetti - he learned to cook it specifically for phum, and phum just kept asking for the same thing every day. i wouldn't be surprised, if he isn't actually allergic to seafood as well, but just says that, because it's easier than explaining that he eats exactly seven foods and nothing else.
🎭 a headcanon about what they lie about
his exact feelings about his parents. i think he's been shamed a lot for feeling the way he does towards them, so he keeps making things up and skirting around the conversation, so he wouldn't have to directly say "i do not want to see them anymore".
❤️🔥 a romantic headcanon
he is extremely romantic in my opinion. i think he believes in soulmateism and true love and the whole shebang. i think he watches lots of romcoms and has probably seen every mlm storyline in existence, dreaming of his own gay little relationship. he has all the proper romantic gestures down to a fine art too, obviously.
💄 an appearance headcanon
yes, he did dye his hair that shade of brown to look more like a teddy bear. slash srs
🖕 a headcanon relating to anger
anger is his mortal enemy. he has a lot of it pent up inside (understandably so), but he thinks it's a very ugly feeling he is "not supposed to feel", so he suppresses it. whenever he feels angry, he just kind of goes inside his shell and leaves the situation.
😺 an animal related headcanon
he is a cat person (hence, peem).
😬 a headcanon about the worst thing they’ve done
straight up the agreement he made with peem at the beginning.
😭 a headcanon about the worst thing that happened to them
being abandoned by his parents at five years old.
😶 a random headcanon!
he isn't as close to toey as he'd like to be, because he is 1) autistic and 2) not particularly well-socialised, so he has a hard time really understanding what social rules to follow for their particular relationship. in his head, he definitely considers toey his younger brother and would absolutely just spoil him rotten and hang out with him a lot, but not a lot of that gets actualised in reality, because he's a little afraid of making any sudden big moves or actively saying that he feels about toey the same way fang feels about him.
#this is all correct and true of course because i am a phum expert#archer responds#dee tag#we are the series#phum tag
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