#our freak is out and matching with other freak

[baocean]

piss off your parents

chapter twenty seven - it was fake

you’d been acting weird ever since sarah all but exploded on you about why jj went awol. you’d barely been over to the house, barely looked at him, barely texted.

he'd freaked you out. he’d hurt you. you werent sure how to react to it.

today was supposed to be good, a group dinner that would smooth everything over, that would make things feel normal again.

he didn’t even let the back door shut behind you before the words were out.

“so that’s it?” jj said, his voice too calm to be anything but dangerous. “hooray, unc. now i’m just… done?”

you froze, fingers still on the doorknob. “what are you talking about?”

he stared at you, eyes sharp, like he was trying to piece you together and nothing was fitting anymore. “your parents gave in. we played our parts perfectly, and now you don’t even look at me.”

you turned slowly, face unreadable. “jj…”

“no, don’t do that,” he snapped. “don’t give me that look like i’m overreacting. like i’m fucking crazy.”

“i’m not—”

“you are,” he cut in. “you’ve been pulling away since the second it worked. you don’t text back, you barely talk to me. you’re acting like i’m something you’re trying to shake off.”

“jj, just...can we not do this right now?” your voice cracked like glass, thin and tight and exhausted.

he laughed, bitter and sharp. “too late. you told me to sell it. said it had to feel real. and i did, yn. i fucking did. i gave you everything i had.”

you flinched. just barely. “that’s not fair,” you said, voice rising, finally matching the heat in his.

“isn’t it?” he shot back. “because it sure as hell feels like i was just part of the plan. and now, i’m nothing but the reminder.”

you crossed your arms, jaw tight. “i never promised you anything.”

jj’s breathing stuttered. you stared at each other, chests rising and falling too fast, like you couldn’t get enough air. anger and fear and want all bleeding into each other, all tangled up beneath your skin.

neither of you spoke. and you so badly wanted him to just say what he was really feeling. but he didnt, he just stared at you.

so you said the worst thing you could think of.

“it was fake, jj.”

his face shifted, like a crack forming right down the middle. like something caved in behind his eyes. but it was only there for a second, before his expression hardened, darkened.

“then what the fuck am i doing here, yn?” his voice was sharp, cutting.

you didn’t answer for a second. you couldn’t. your throat felt like it was closing.

you shrugged, blinking back the tears that would have given you away in a heartbeat.

jj wanted to walk out right now. but he couldnt, wouldnt, he wasn’t ready to let it go, not yet. he was still angry. still hurt. and his best idea was to hurt you right back.

“right. because none of it meant anything to you, huh?” he said, stepping closer. “not the nights you stayed. not the way you looked at me like you meant it. not the kiss.”

“don’t you dare put this all on me,” you shot back, taking a step forward yourself, fire in your eyes. “you’re not the only one who’s been caught up in this, jj. i’m not some heartless person who used you. this isn’t my fault.”

jj’s expression faltered for a moment, but then he snapped, “yeah? feels like it is.”

you ground your teeth, chest tight with anger. “you want to talk about fault? you haven’t even congratulated me on unc, the thing i’ve worked so hard for! you disappeared for twenty hours, and then you came back acting like i’m the one who shut myself off!”

“congrats, bunny." his voice cracked. "you wanted your freedom? to revolt against your parents? your little rebellion before your perfect life at college? well, you’re free. you’re so fucking free.”

“jj—”

“a deal’s a deal, you got your end. we can finally be done now,” he said, his voice cold and rough, like he didn’t recognize it. “go ahead and leave. forget about all this like it never happened. just like you always planned.”

you stared at him, throat burning, chest tight. you wanted to scream. to cry. to tell him he was wrong, to tell him he was right.

instead you said, “fuck you, jj.”

it came out low. furious. shaky. and it made jj's face fall, his body go limp.

you didn’t wait for him to answer, and he didn’t stop you from leaving.

her phone

his phone

her phone

masterlist | next chapter

note from the author - i’m sorry please forgive me

taglist - @dr3amgrlll / @murdockcastleslut / @jjmaybankmylovee / @smokahontas-113 / @abigailovesz / @enchantedstarfish / @reeseswirl / @lmaowhatt / @moonywhisp3rs / @dylsdaily / @idli-dosa / @bloodofadoll / @cokewithcameron / @mariamadison6-blog / @rrosiitas / @always-reading / @sunflouer04 / @bambigirl10 / @mirellef2001 / @wasiasproject t / @bee-43 / @kissesandmartinis / @gublerstylesobrien1238 / @isinpfortvdmen / @sabrina-carpenter-stan-account / @mjwashere / @sideboobrry11 / @ameliacione13 / @wrtzia / @sanriobuny / @dramagodesss / @luvrclub / @yesshewrites1 / @ayy1234567 / @doesnt-care / @rainingcecilias

[muscleloverz69]

New Friends Part 1

Scott was my best friend. It's every girl's dream to have a gay best friend like Scott. He was funny and kind. Guys were never threatened by him either because he was just a 5’5 beanpole. Scott was hanging out with me in my bedroom with my boyfriend Robby. The three of us were enjoying a movie. Scott was on the floor while I was cuddled up with Robby on the bed. 

Robby was a perfect boyfriend, a 6 '5 slab of beautifully sculpted muscle. His arms were larger than Scotts entire leg and his pecs made perfect pillows. He was a quiet guy but had a massive dick to make up for it. He was also very sweet, giving me thoughtful presents constantly. My favorite was a heart locket with strands of his hair in it so we’re always together.  I’ve seen Scott steal a peak at my boyfriend quite a few times but Robby was 100% straight.

Scott looked up at us on the bed “you guys are so lucky to have each other.” 

I smiled back at him. Scott was very single, no gay guy was ever interested in him. I was trying to figure out what to say to him when my bedroom door flung open. It was my brother, Vince. If there was anyone objectively hotter than my boyfriend it was my brother. That might sound fucked up but it was true he had everything Robby had but add in a brooding attitude and manliness Robby can’t compete with. The only problem was he was an asshole who hated me.

“Hey Melissa I see your loser friend is over.”

I rolled my eyes, Scott just sat there quietly, obviously overwhelmed by Vince’s presence before finally opening his mouth “Oh um yeah, hi Vince how are you.”

“You are such a gay freak.” Vince chuckled. “Anyway Melissa I’m here because I decided I’m sick of you always bringing your boyfriend over especially when I need a new best friend.”

I was confused until I saw Vince reveal a book from behind his back. Our family comes from a powerful line of witches and that book is the family spellbook. I realized too late however as with just a few magic words a spell hit Robby right in the face.

“Robby, what did he just do to you!”

 I watched as Robby sat up, his face contorted into a sneer. “It’s Rob bitch, now leave me alone so I can hang with my bro Vince.”

My heart dropped as ‘Rob’ stood up and walked away with Vince. Just like that I had lost my boyfriend.

Over the next few days everything changed for me. Rob was over almost everyday but he was a different person. He now had that same brooding energy as my brother and they did everything together. I would watch them as they came back from the gym, threw a ball around, or harassed Scott. Robby never would have mistreated Scott but Rob seemed to love it just like Vince. The two of them would bring girls home too which really stung. When Rob saw me instead of love in his eyes it was annoyance. I was now just his best friend’s dumb sister instead of his girlfriend. My heart was shattered and all I could think of was revenge.

Rob’s Perspective

“Bro I can’t believe I was ever with your bitch sister. This body was meant to be shared.” Rob flexed one of his massive biceps. 

Vince chuckled, popping his massive pecs in response “Yeah and no more of those pussy sweaters and shit she had you in. Only compression shirts and sweats to show off to the ladies.” 

They were on their way to a club planning a wild night, Robby used to never drink, but Rob pounded beers like it was water.

That wasn’t the only way Rob changed though. His once brown hair had turned blonde just like Vince, his voice dropped an octave to resemble his new friends as well as his muscles swelled to match his bro.

It didn’t take long for Rob and Vince to find Bimbos to hook up with at the club, they took them both to the bathroom excited to drop a load. Both of them entered the handicap stall. Rob took his massive dick out and started to stroke it up and down, hips gyrating as he did. He lowered his pants more just below his ass causing his bubble but to shake a little. He bent his bimbo over and without any foreplay shoved his dick into her. His shaft quickly thrusting as a deep moan rumbled in his throat. Vince had done the same to his girl, grabbing her hair with one hand as he put his muscled torso to good use.

The two bros were so focused on their chicks they didn’t even notice as Melissa entered the bathroom. She had found the family spellbook from where Vince had hidden it and now it was time for her revenge. A spell once cast could not be undone but it can be altered by a new spell.

Rob was close to finishing his ass starting to clench in anticipation. He hardly noticed as the space around him changed. The men in the bathroom were now mostly shirtless, all of them extremely well muscled and attractive. In fact even Rob and Vince’s shirts had vanished. There was also now a suspicious number of men kissing other men. Rob felt his dick get closer and closer as the twink underneath him let out a moan before his load filled up the guy's ass. He pulled out, the boy's ass still leaking. Vince finished too, and they both pulled back on their thongs and went back to the club. 

Rob felt like something was off but couldn’t put his finger on it as he rubbed up against a jock's ass. He looked towards his bro Vince as he watched him get spanked by a very sexy leather daddy. He realized he did find his friend very attractive. Rob possessively walked up to Vince placing a hand on his muscular arm. “Hey, what if we took this back to your place.” 

Vince’s eyes went wide with anticipated pleasure as they left. In the car Rob felt a strange fog in his head before shaking it off, he loved his boyfriend and best bro and was so excited to get home.

The second they entered the house Vince picked up Rob by the ass and pinned him against the wall. Rob wrapped his well defined legs around Vince’s waist as they kissed. Tongues darting back and forth as deep moans were exchanged. Vince lowered Rob down before bending just slightly to Rob’s chest, Vince glanced up predatorily before beginning to lick Rob’s meaty pec settling on his nipple, biting it gently. Rob whimpered, running his hand across Vince’s chiseled face before reaching upward and grabbing his soft blonde hair. Rob with a fistful of Vince’s hair in hand forced Vince onto his knees. Vince lowered Rob’s jock and a thick cock bounced out slapping him in the face. Vince’s tongue ran once down the shaft while his hand gripped the base. His mouth gently began cradling one of Rob’s balls in his mouth causing Rob to exude an uncharacteristically high moan. Vince carefully released him before greedily taking him into his mouth gagging as he did. Rob gripped Vince’s hair tighter as he began to fuck his face. Vince ran his free hand down Rob’s abs as the thrusting increased in pace faster and faster until he pulled back just in time for Rob to splatter Vince’s face.

Both panting hot and sweaty. Neither noticed Melissa watching from the stairs. “Now it's time to get a boyfriend back.”

[sylas-the1st]

Hello! I love the way your blog hypes up posts and encourages people to create more; this is exactly what we need in this fandom. You have inspired me to express more of my excitement about the amazing things people share on here.

Wishing you a lovely day!

Aww you're so kind! I just can't resist celebrating those who put themselves out there! Just because (most of us) are adults doesn't mean we shouldn't feel good about being who we are. Kids get rewards like stickers, verbal praise, high fives, their drawings and creations hung around schools, their fridge at home, given as heartfelt gifts to family and friends; that end up kept for years like time capsules! We all should have such things our entire lives :)

[chiistarri]

what if instead of messaging me in the middle of the night about your stupid fucking girlfriend and your stupid fucking problems with her you actually act like my fucking friend and message me like how you message everyone else in our group

[forest-from-the-trees]

why are gifts so fucking difficult oh my godd. starting to look for anniversary gifts for my partner cause weve got about two months to go, and i swear to god anytime theres a holiday where we have to give gifts i panic.

its so difficult cause in theory i know what she likes but i dont feel like we spend enough time around each other to know what style of things she likes yknow? ill send her stuff occasionally that i like and i feel like she has a really good grasp on the things i enjoy cause i have such a distinct style. for her though like i know for a fact that she doesnt dress in the way she wants to, but if she was given the chance i dont know what she would choose to wear. like what she wears now is different than what she would wear if she had the choice to redo and choose her own wardrobe (her words). so like. i always freak out when buying jewelry and stuff like that cause i dont know if its a thing that she would like or not based on how weird that situation is right now.

[large-penises-sporting-goods]

Broke: going to a fancy restaurant with your bf on Valentine's Day

Woke: going to work with your bf (coworker) on Valentine's Day, and taking advantage of the lack of customers to team up and psychologically torment your other coworker with spongebob YTPs

[hollabastiongirl]

it's often crazy to me that the person I'm sharing my life with is the same person I went to Disney World with when we were in middle school. Who i "started a band" with on the elementary school playground. Who has seen me at my very worst and my very best and who knows me like literally no one else does. there's a special kind of intimacy from our bond that I really can't put into words, but it blows my mind all the time.

[kbwrites]

Heated Waters

synopsis: being married is hard, being married without seeing each other is even harder.

⚝ content: Hiromi Higuruma x F! Reader, nsfw, bathtub sex, fingering, Hiromi neglects his wife, but boy does he make up for it

⚝ wc: 1.9k

“Yeah we do it pretty much every day.”

Satoru said, taking a leisurely sip of his water. His pale face alight with mischief, a shit-eating grin across his lips. His three coworkers stared at him in (jealousy) disbelief.

Suguru was the first to break the silence, wanting to save face “Everyday is a bit much, isn’t it, Satoru?”

Satoru chuckled, his blue eyes glinting with amusement as he watched his friend squirm. "What about you guys? How often do our married friends get it in?" His gaze flickered to Nanami, who cleared his throat and adjusted his glasses, his eyes fixed on the steam rising from his coffee cup.

“Twice a week, I suppose…”

Satoru's smile widened, clearly entertained by the responses he was drawing out. He then turned his attention to the oldest among them, Hiromi Higuruma, who was carefully straightening his tie, a subtle attempt to avoid eye contact.

“What about you, Higuruma?”

“Your wife, (Y/N) is a little younger than you, right? C’mon Higuruma-San…She a total freak?” Satoru teased.

Hiromi's jaw tightened, a flicker of irritation crossing his features as his grip on his coffee cup tightened. He took a slow, measured breath, his voice strained but controlled when he finally spoke.

“Please don’t talk about my wife like that.”

But Satoru, ever the instigator, didn’t back down. “It’s just us guys riiggght? And I can’t lie Higuruma, you’re one lucky guy. (Y/N) is a catch.”

Nanami nodded in agreement, as did Suguru, though both seemed to sense the discomfort growing in Hiromi. The older man could only sigh, his shoulders sagging under the weight of the conversation.

It was true—you were everything he could have ever wanted in a partner. Beautiful, intelligent, kind-hearted—his perfect match. If heaven existed, Hiromi was certain you’d be the only one worthy of it.

But long nights in the office, and early mornings preparing for court would take a toll on any relationship. The truth was… Hiromi hadn’t touched you in over a month. By the time he came home—you were fast asleep, and weekends were spent running the mountain of errands you couldn’t get to during the week. You loved each other of course, but it was hard. A month without feeling the warmth of your husband's hands all over your skin was starting to weigh heavily on both of you.

“You don’t have to answer Higuruma-san..” Nanami chimed in, sensing his elder colleague’s discomfort.

“Over a month.” Hiromi exhaled, the truth slipping out before he could stop it.

The room fell silent, the weight of his words sinking in.

“WHAT?” Gojo audibly gasps. “Your wife looks like THAT and you haven’t f—”

Suguru swiftly cut him off with a well-placed elbow to the chest. “Satoru… leave Higuruma alone.” The long-haired male warns. “Still, that is surprising.”

“I know I know..” Higuruma pinches his bridge. He wanted nothing more than to have his wife under him… on top of him. But the endless stream of work kept him trapped in a cycle of exhaustion. “I’ve been so busy I can’t even remember the last time I actually spoke to her properly.”

Suguru offered an apologetic smile. “Sounds like you need a break.”

“Sounds like you need some puss—” Nanami quickly elbowed Satoru in the chest before he could finish his sentence.

Hiromi shook his head, letting out a dry chuckle as he ran a hand through his dark locks, clearly frustrated with himself. “I appreciate your concern, guys, but I don’t see how I can take a break right now. I have so much work to do, and I’m the only one who knows how to handle all of it.”

“Higuruma-San. Satoru will take care of the paperwork for you.” Nanami suggested with a deadpan expression.

“HUH?” Satoru blurted out, clearly caught off guard by the sudden assignment.

“Yeah,” Nanami continued, ignoring Satoru’s protest. “It’s not like he actually does any work around here anyway.”

Suguru smirked, nodding in agreement. “That’s true. You might as well make yourself useful, Satoru.”

Before Hiromi could protest, the trio moved in unison—Suguru grabbing Hiromi’s briefcase, Nanami steering him toward the door, and Satoru sighing dramatically as he resigned himself to the task.

“Are… are you boys sure about this? I don’t want to burden you–”

“Nonsense! Go home and take care of your wife!”

Hiromi placed his briefcase by the door, his tie feeling suddenly too tight around his neck. He loosened it with a sigh, running a hand through his hair as he glanced around. The familiar scent of home greeted him. It was comforting yet bittersweet, a reminder of all the moments he had missed. The living room was tidy, the soft hum of the dishwasher running in the kitchen. You had clearly been busy, taking care of the house as you always did, even when he wasn’t around.

“Honey?” Hiromi calls out to you, his voice echoing slightly in the stillness.

Frowning, he shrugged off his jacket and draped it over the back of a chair before making his way down the hall. As he approached the bathroom, he noticed a faint light seeping out from under the door, accompanied by the sound of water gently lapping against the tub.

He hesitated for a moment, then slowly opened the door.

The sight that greeted him made his breath catch in his throat. There you were, reclining in the bathtub, your eyes closed, head resting on the edge as steam rose around you. The soft glow of candles illuminated the room, casting a warm, serene light over your features.

You looked so peaceful, so beautiful—that it almost hurt to look at you. The tension in his shoulders eased slightly as he took in the sight, but the guilt and longing only deepened. How long had it been since he’d taken the time to appreciate you like this? Since he’d been able to just… be with you?

You opened your eyes, gaze meeting your husband as he leaned against the door frame.

“Hiromi?” you murmured, your voice soft, almost questioning, as if unsure whether he was really there or just a figment of your imagination.

“Hey Honey…” his voice equally soft, as he took a tentative step closer. The warmth of the room seemed to wrap around him, melting away some of the day’s stress.

“You’re home early.” You muse, looking at him as you rested your arms on the tub. He doesn’t respond, just walks towards you with purposeful steps.

Hiromi stares down at you with half-lidded eyes.“The guys decided I need a break.” He paused, his breath hitching slightly as he continued, “Can I join you?” A playful smirk tugged at the corner of your lips.

“Only if you take off your clothes this time.”

A dry chuckle escaped his lips as he unbuttons his dress shirt, letting each article of clothing fall to the tile floor. As he finally sheds his boxers before settling behind you. You exhaled softly, the tension you’d been holding onto for weeks dissipating as you sank into your husband’s embrace.

Hiromi didn’t waste a moment, his lips finding the sensitive skin of your neck, placing lazy, lingering kisses along the curve where your shoulder met your throat. His breath was warm against your skin, his kisses slow and unhurried, as if savoring every second, every inch of you.

His hands weren’t idle either, tracing gentle patterns along your stomach, moving upwards to cup your breasts with a tenderness that made your breath hitch. He nipped lightly at your earlobe, his voice a husky murmur, “I’ve missed you… more than you know.”

“Missed you too ‘Romi..” Your voice trembling as the almost foreign heat began to pool in your core.

Deft fingers teased your nipples, rolling and pinching—eliciting a soft moan from your lips as your body arched into his touch. Your hand reached back, tangling in his dark locks, pulling him closer as his lips traveled down to your shoulder, his other hand snaking under the water to your aching cunt.

“ahhhh… s-shitt..” You cry out as Hiromi’s fingers slowly circle your swollen bud. His touch light, teasing.

“Thirty-two days… I’m so sorry m’love.” He mumbles into your shoulder as he slips a slender digit into your entrance. Your walls flutter immediately around the intrusion, as he gently pumped into you.

He adds another finger, curling up to the spot he had neglected all those weeks. He extended his thumb to rub your clit. You arch your back against him, feeling his cock twitch against your ass.

“Hiro…” you moan, reaching behind for him, but he bites down lightly on your shoulder.

“Not yet, pretty girl, want you t’cum first okay?”

He whispers as he feels your gummy walls clench around him.

He speeds up his ministrations, digits stuffing your cunt as your pussy throbs and squelches. Your whimpers echo around the tiled walls, water lapping around your bodies.

You feel the pressure building as each thrust of his long fingers brush against your g-spot.

“g-gonna cum!”

“Cum f’me sweetheart please—god… need it so bad.” Hiromi mumbles as he pumps even faster.

“a-ahh!” you cry as you reach your high, walls clenching as you cum on your husband’s hand. He removes his fingers from you, moving to gently circle your clit as you come down from your orgasm.

You both stay there for a moment, your heavy breathing the only sound occupying the space, mingling with the gentle slosh of water against the porcelain tub. Hiromi’s arms wrapped securely around your waist, pulling you closer.

Slowly, he lifted you, the warm water swirling around you both as he maneuvered you to face him, settling you on his lap. Your legs instinctively wrapped around his waist, your knees pressing against the cool sides of the tub.

You straddled Hiromi, your bodies now fully aligned, chest to chest. Your husband's dark, half-lidded eyes bore into yours, his expression a mixture of raw need and unspoken tenderness. He let his hands rest on your waist for a moment, thumbs tracing gentle circles against your damp skin as he took in the sight of you.

“I don’t know how I’ve stayed away from you for so long…” his voice breaking slightly as if the admission pained him.

Your breath hitched as you shifted slightly in his lap, feeling the tension between you intensify. Hiromi’s hands slid up your sides, his touch deliberate and slow, leaving a trail of heat in their wake as his lips finally found yours. The kiss was deep, full of hunger that had been simmering between you both for far too long.

His grip on your waist tightened as he deepened the kiss, his tongue sliding against yours in a dance that left you dizzy with need.

Breaking the kiss, Hiromi leaned his forehead against yours, his breath coming in shallow gasps.

“I won’t make that mistake again.”

Without a word, he rose from the tub, lifting you effortlessly into his arms. Water cascaded down your bodies, pooling at your feet as he carried you toward the bedroom, his lips trailing wet kisses down the side of your neck.

He laid you gently onto the bed, your back sinking into the soft silken sheets, but Hiromi didn’t waste any time. His gaze darkening as he climbed over you, his body hovering just above yours, his eyes drinking you in like a man starved.

“I’m going to make up for every second I’ve missed.”

[kthologue]

meet cute — dick grayson

synopsis. dick finally meets his match.

contents. fluff, meet cute, banter!!, dick found someone that matched his freak, matchmaker haley, established relationship

notes. quick drabble. there’s nothing i love more than writing banter for dick

The first thing Dick registers is the smell of coffee, its scent curling through the morning air. The second thing is the warmth pressed against his side, a familiar weight shifting slightly as the bed dips.

"You make the coffee, or am I dreaming?" he mumbles, cracking an eye open.

"Dreaming," you tease, brushing your fingers through his hair. "But I got up first, so I figured I'd be nice."

Dick hums, pulling you back down beside him. "Mm. Marry me."

"Already did, remember?"

"Best decision of my life." He presses a lazy kiss to your temple. Dick softly grips your chin before slotting his mouth against yours. Outside the bedroom, Haley lets out an impatient whine, toenails clicking against the hardwood.

A smile curves against your lips as Dick deepens the kiss, his free hand trailing down your back, holding you close like he never wants to let go. His grip is firm, his warmth intoxicating and you already know exactly where this morning is heading.

But the insistent scratching and pitiful whines from outside the door refuse to be ignored.

You pull away just as Dick leans in, earning yourself a dramatic whine of protest. His lips chase yours, his grip tightening. "Babe," he murmurs, a little breathless, "she can wait."

"She’s been waiting," you counter, amused. "And she’s missed you."

"Well, I missed you," he huffs, leaning in again, only for you to dodge him, fixing him with a knowing look.

He sighs, defeated. "Alright, alright. Duty calls."

Grumbling, he rolls out of bed, and you laugh, tossing a pillow at his back as he trudges to the door.

“Be nice,” you tease as he lets Haley in.

The second the door cracks open, she barrels into him, tail wagging so hard she practically vibrates. Dick catches her effortlessly, laughing as she smothers him in licks, all lingering traces of sleep and reluctance melting away.

“She’s our little matchmaker, after all,” you remind him, watching the way his face softens.

Dick looks up at you, a smile tugging at his lips between Haley’s eager kisses. His laugh fills the room, warm and familiar. Your favorite sound.

"How could I ever forget?"

Dick hadn’t expected anything unusual that day. It had been a normal walk. Until it wasn’t.

Haley was a good dog. A well-trained, even-tempered pitbull who never pulled on the leash, never bolted, never strayed. So when she suddenly yanked forward with enough force to nearly dislocate Dick’s shoulder, he barely had time to react before she took off.

"What the–" He staggered after her, half-jogging, half-stumbling as she dragged him down the street. "Haley, slow down! What has gotten into you?"

She wasn’t listening. Her ears were perked, tail wagging like she’d just spotted the world's biggest stash of treats. Dick barely had a second to brace himself before she barreled straight into a woman standing at the corner, nearly knocking her over.

"I'm so sorry–Haley!" Dick gasped, yanking the leash back.

The woman let out a startled laugh, catching herself just in time. "Wow, okay. Not how I expected to start my morning."

Dick winced. "Yeah, sorry about that. She doesn’t usually– uh– body-check people. Are you okay?"

"I think so. Can’t say the same for my dignity, though."

He chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck. "Well, if it helps, she only does this to people she likes. Which is a very exclusive club, by the way."

"Oh? So I should be honored?" you asked, arching a brow.

"Very." He smirked. "You’re in the same category as rotisserie chicken and that one mailman she has a crush on."

You snorted. "High praise. I’ll try to live up to it."

The two of you linger on the sidewalk, grinning at each other like idiots. The moment stretches just long enough for him to realize he had forgotten to introduce himself.

“Oh– uh, I’m Richard. But everyone calls me Dick.”

Your lips twitch as you nod slowly. “Nice to meet you, Dick.”

The way you say it is so smooth, effortless. It shouldn’t make his brain short-circuit, but damn if it doesn’t send a spark straight through him. He swears he can feel it in his fingertips.

Great. He’s a fully grown man, and somehow, you’ve got him feeling like a teenager with a crush.

Haley’s tail was going so fast her entire body wiggled with it, pure joy wrapped in fur. You crouched down, scratching behind her ears. “Well, aren’t you gorgeous?”

Dick cleared his throat, barely audible. “Yeah, you are.”

Your head snapped up. “What was that?”

“Must’ve been the wind.”

“Oh,” you mused, turning back to Haley. “Your dad’s got a pretty face, but I think he might be a little unhinged.” You don’t bother being discreet.

The pitbull tilted her head, eyes flicking between the two of you like she was weighing the evidence.

Dick huffed a laugh. “She’s deciding whether to defend my honor or side with you.”

“Smart girl, taking her time with the verdict.” You grinned, giving Haley an approving pat. “But seriously, I’ve never seen a dog so determined to tackle a stranger. Did you train her to be your wingman, or is she just naturally talented?"

Dick placed a hand over his heart. "I would never exploit my dog for romance."

"Uh-huh. So this is just a coincidence?"

"Purely."

"Right." You smirked. "And I’m supposed to believe this isn’t a well-rehearsed scheme?"

Dick grinned. "If it were, I’d like to think I’d have prepared better material. I’m usually much smoother."

"You’re really not."

"That’s the tragic part."

You laughed, standing up and dusting off your pants. "Well, Dick, I think your dog just got you a date."

He blinked. "Was that a yes? Or did Haley just finesse me into this?"

"Guess you’ll have to keep up and find out."

Dick opened his mouth, then paused, brow furrowing. "Wait, did I even get your name?"

You grinned. "Did I give it?"

"No, but I feel like I should have it before I let you con me into a date."

You tilted her head, considering. "I suppose that’s fair. But where’s the fun in just handing it over?"

Dick huffed a laugh. "So what, I have to earn it?"

"You’re catching on."

Haley barked once, tail thumping against the pavement like she was enjoying this far too much.

"Alright." Dick crouched, giving his dog a scratch behind the ears. "Haley, girl, looks like we’ve got a mystery to solve."

You laughed, shaking your head as you turned to walk away. "Try to keep up, Dick."

In that moment, he knew he was in trouble.

Dick didn’t have to be told twice.

comments n reblogs are appreciated!

[velourmobius]

Mutt

resume: f!reader matches caleb’s freak.

mdni. 18+ content!!!

tags: dirty talking, scent kink, usage of gege , plenty of good girls and good boys, praises, slight puppy play, squ1rting, feasting on the kitty, f1ngering, piss kink, multiple orgasms, needy caleb, caleb comes handsfree like a loser, slightly yanderes vibes from both characters

pairing: caleb x reader

word count : 4.3k words

a/n.: i was horny and inspired by a conversation with other lads player about our smut hc’s. it’s my first fic for caleb ❤️ next up should be sylus c:

It was so wrong of you to be doing this. You tried to convince yourself that you couldn’t help your actions, that your actions were caused by how much you love him. Still, it was hard to justify stealing his silk briefs from the hamper in the bathroom.

“Aah- fuck, gege.” Your whimpers were as quiet as you could muster yourself to be.

You barely knew how you ended up in the bedroom you had in Caleb’s house. You had no idea what had led you to get on your elbows and knees, his briefs tightly secured in your fist that you pressed against your nose and mouth. You inhaled his scent, filling your lungs with it while you rubbed your sensitive clit in tight circles with your other hand. It wasn’t the first time you’ve stolen briefs but it certainly was your first time touching yourself using one. It sickened your mind that the first thought you had was “Why didn’t I do this before?”.

When you and Caleb lived at grandma’s house, you’d occasionally steal his underwear. You’d use his shirts to rub one out once in a while, but you thought that going from his underwear. His soiled underwear might be going a little too far but man, did you feel stupid for not doing this before. His musk was making you much more wet than you’ve ever been. The moment you saw that pair of undies sitting on top of all the other clothes, it was almost like the damn thing was sparkling.

You began getting wet, at that moment, recalling your misdeeds of the past. Shuddering, you grabbed it and looked it over. It was light grey, the pouch of it slightly stretched out and well used. The thing that really caught your attention was the darker spot on it. The stain made your mouth water, your mind already wandering at the feasibility of it being either a cum or piss stain. Could Colonel Xia have gotten aroused at work, thinking about a certain someone and needing relief.

It didn’t matter much more now that you were smelling it. You felt yourself get high off of it, rapidly approaching your climax. “ G-gege, aah, fuck, I’m so close.” You gasp, shoving your hand slightly down and pressing your digit against your fluttering hole. Pushing inside, you sighed happily. Instead of moving your hand, you fucked back against your finger quickly. The squelching coming from your cunt was louder than you expected, sounding so perverse that you felt your face flushing a bit more than it already was. The coil that had built up in the pit of your stomach got tighter as the seconds passed, your pace only increasing until it finally snapped.

Pushing the bundled up briefs against your face, you gasped out a long drawn out moan while your entire body jerked. A gush of wetness sprayed out of you, wetting your fresh panties way quicker than usual. Still, you weren’t satisfied. You needed more. Panting, you continued to move your hips slower. Your essence was going down your thighs, as well as dripping down your hand. Your mind was hazy, your gege’s musk making you dumb and eager for more.

And the reason behind all of your moans and squeals? He was standing by the door, having opened it slightly since he didn’t get an answer from you after he knocked on the door. Caleb was frozen in place, not budging. The moment he’d opened the door, he was greeted by the sight of you. You, with your hand shoved in your panties and fucking yourself?

That was too much, even for him. Caleb felt his brain short-circuiting, unable to believe at the sight before him. On the other hand, his dick immediately believed his sight and grew rock hard. His meimei. There she was, touching herself to him? His wildest dream was coming to life, in the most unexpected way.

The sexual tension between them had grown so strong that Caleb, certified master cuddler, had begun to refrain from indulging. He was constantly scared of popping off a boner whenever you pressed up against him for too long. There was nothing he wanted more than to be with you, but the possibility of messing up the relationship he had cultivated with you terrified him.

You’d come back to him after he made you wait, you’d forgiven him for his possessive behavior. You were almost like a saint to him. But this? Seeing you get yourself off while you moaned for him, that shattered the illusion he had of you being untouchable. You were more than a saint. You were his goddess and he was a simple humble servant.

“O-oh fuck.. Please, please, please, hah, m’cumming.”

Your moans began getting louder again, growing more desperate and needy. Caleb wasn’t faring any better than you, his hand having slipped down into his sweatpants and gripping his erection. He’d been leaking since he first caught sight of you so his strokes were quick and slick, light headed with pleasure. His strokes were growing quicker, his breathing growing heavier. He put his free hand against the door, clumsily pushing it slightly more open.

The creaking of the door was enough to get your attention, your head snapping to the source of the noise. Caleb slipped his hand out of his sweats seconds before your half lidded eyes widened, looking right into Caleb’s purple orbs and you gasped loudly, letting out a squeal.

Turning your back to him again, you buried your face in your pillow. Reaching back, you grabbed the blanket that had slid off your body. Not a word was said by neither of you, yet Caleb didn’t walk away. He stood there, looking at you unsure if walking away was the right thing to do now.

“Pips?” Caleb rasped, his voice wrecked. You swore this had to be a nightmare. It couldn’t be possible that he’d seen you? Why was he there? Why didn’t he knock on the door? Why didn’t he stop you once he saw what you were doing?! Did he hear you call out to him? Another question that you tried to bury in the layers of your complicated mind was simple and the only one who’s answer actually mattered to you - Did he enjoy watching you? - You shook your head, tightening your grip on your pillow. “Don’t say anything..” You whimpered.

“I know this is not one of the best moments, I’ll grant you that, but we hafta talk. This is..something we really need to discuss.” His voice was closer, the sound of his footsteps getting nearer. “I know you feel embarrassed. I just need to see your face and make sure you’re okay. Please, pipsqueak?” He wasn’t trying but he knew he sounded like he was begging. He needed you to look him in the eyes, so you could see all the love and desire that swirled within them. Just one glance and you’d know that if you let him, he’d be your everything. He’d be your sun and you’d be the moon he’d been chasing after for so long. “To say what, Caleb? You..This.. God, fuck me.” You grumbled, turning your head opposite of the side where he was standing.

“You have no idea how much I want to.” The words stumbled out of Caleb’s mouth, unable to hold back the retort. He watched your body tense up under your blanket, unmoving for a few seconds before you slowly peeled it back and glanced at him. “W-what..?” Now, you saw two things.

The first was Caleb looked down at you, his eyebrows furrowed slightly and his bottom lip tucked between his teeth. His cheeks were bright red, flushed like he was drunk. His eyes were looking right back into yours, a familiar emotion within them.

The second was his bulge. It was, err, larger than you’d imagined and obviously hard in his sweatpants that did absolutely nothing to hide. There was a wet patch on it and you really had to contain yourself from licking your lips. “That’s all your fault, (y/n).” Caleb’s eyes followed yours, a slightly smug look appearing in his eyes while a little grin curled his mouth up.

Rolling your eyes, you huffed at his suggestion and found it in you to pout at him. “I thought you said you just wanted to make sure I was okay.” You retorted back to him. “Yeah, I did.” Caleb sighed, sitting down at the edge of your bed. Raising an eyebrow, you looked at his broad muscular back ,then up to the nape of his neck. You wanted to muster the energy for one of your signature replies to his every action but this time, the words got stuck in your throat. “D’ya think we could’ve avoided this by being more..straight forward with each other?” Caleb asked. He did his best to suppress it, really he did, but you heard the tremor in his voice. It was like everything hung up on that single question of his.

“You mean,us being in love and skirting around it.” You threw out. Caleb’s body tensed up, watching and hearing him take a long deep shaky breath. “Yeah..Exactly that.” Even if he was facing away from you, you could see how red his ears had become. “You know.. Regardless of it all, I’ve considered myself to be yours. Only yours.” You mumbled, laying on your left side and holding your right arm out.

Your fingers reached their target once you felt the hem of Caleb’s white t-shirt, tugging on it slightly. A shuddering gasp escaped his mouth, rolling his shoulders as he took another deep breath but he didn’t budge. “Gege..” Licking your lips nervously, you grabbed the blanket that was on you and pushed it down slightly before getting on your knees. Feeling the mattress dipping behind him, Caleb couldn’t help but flinch.

He heaved a sigh, feeling your arms wrapping around his shoulders. Your breast pressed up against him, your stiffened buds flattened against his muscular back. “Fuck..” Caleb whimpered out, revealing in you pressing yourself all up on him. He immediately relaxed into your hold, groaning at you nuzzling your cheek against his hair. “ I’ll be yours. You’re the only person I’ve ever had eyes for, Caleb.” You purred, pressing a kiss on his red ear. “Be mine, gege.” This last word, the soft and suggestive tone you used, broke him entirely. He turned his head and you backed up a little, but he grabbed your chin and chased your lips.

The first kiss was chaste and soft, almost like he was afraid you’d break into a million pieces. The second though was full of yearning and lust, your hands finding the soft strands of Caleb’s hair. He smelled like home. He was your home. You bit his bottom lip gently, drinking in the gasp he let out. You took that opportunity to dip your tongue into his mouth, deepening the kiss further and feeling Caleb’s tongue against yours. A moan slipped out of you, making Caleb’s cock throb after he finally got to hear those sweet sounds from your mouth again.

“C-caleb..” You cooed, pressing your forehead against him. “Yeah..?” He nuzzled his nose against yours. “You…want to help me out? With what I was doing before you rudely interrupted me.” You chided, a light playful tone to your voice. You didn’t even finish your sentence and your very own puppy boy was nodding furiously, almost throwing himself on his knees and looking up to you eagerly.

All that missed was his furry ears and tail to complete the look. “Please..” He groaned, watching you move closer to the edge of the bed and sitting there with your legs spread. After a quick reflection, you placed one of your legs on his shoulder to give him more space for him to admire what was between your legs. Your panties, useless with how wet they’ve been, clung to your puffy pussy while you sensitive clit throbbed. Your poor empty hole was clenching around nothing, your walls dying to have something inside.

Caleb was staring at you, eyes boring into your panty clad cunt. Now that he was getting a closer look, he was mesmerized at how drenched and sloppy you’d been for him. “That’s all fo’ me, pips? I make you this wet without even touching you.” Caleb murmured, pressing a kiss on your thigh and falling in love all over again after your entire body shuddered.

His kisses only grew more greedy, sucking on your skin and leaving hickeys. He chased those with various bite marks, leaving a reminder of who you belonged to. “S’ all mine. You’re mine.” Caleb growled, nipping at your skin. You whimpered, moaning softly at his touches while you felt your core aching. “You’ve gotten so much more wet, pips. Do you like getting marked by your gege? People will know that you’re my possession, my precious girl.” Caleb’s darkened gaze was almost hypnotizing, making you feel you were falling into the abyss of them.

With glazed eyes, you watched him inch toward his target and stop once he was facing your pussy. You squirmed when you felt his warm breath fanning against your damp panties, making them slightly cooler against your burning core. Without a single word from him, you felt his tongue flattening against your leaking slit and he licked a broad strip, flicking the tip of his tongue against your sensitive swollen clit. The way you arched your back off the bed and moaned loudly had your new lover quivering with newfound pleasure. “You taste so good..” Caleb noted, grabbing the seat of your panties and pushing it to the side to give it a direct lick. A shuddering breath came out of your mouth, feeling Caleb lapping at your pussy greedily.

He wrapped his arm around the leg that was on his shoulder, tugging you closer to him. “G-gege, it feels so good. Ah, fuck, keep going, please..” You cried out, hips bucking onto his face. The coil in your abdomen was growing tighter with every lick and suck Caleb gave you. The moans that reverberted against your pussy made your eyes roll back and your jaw slack, gripping the sheets with one hand and the other buried in Caleb’s air. You did everything in your power to not break eye contact with him, his steady gaze on yours while he ate you out like a man starved. Your grip on his hair tightened after he moved back slightly, using his middle and ring finger to spread your lips. “So pretty f’me, sweets. I think your greedy little hole needs to be filled, am I wrong?”

Thinking has become too hard and formulating. Your mouth only opened to let out the softest coos and moans, exclusively for Caleb’s ears. “P-please, gege, m-more.” You rasped, feeling his nose bumping against your swollen clit while his tongue teased your entrance. “When you sound so sweet, I can’t possibly say no to you.” Your mouth dropped open in a silent cry, eyes wide open and inhaling sharply.

You were about to come apart on him, trying your best to hold on. Your efforts proved to be in vain when your vision went white, every muscle in your body tensing up once you felt Caleb’s press his tongue inside your clenching hole. Another squirt escaped your body, splashing on him and he greedily drank you up. You made a strangled noise, making your new lover look up to you and he took in the most beautiful sight of his life. “You came so good for me, baby. What a good girl you are.” Here you were, coming apart because of him. Your glassy eyes, mouth agape with a hint of drool spilling from it. “Aah..Haah..F-fuck.” You stuttered. Your body was shuddering, clenching hard around his tongue. You let out a soft sigh when you felt Caleb’s hand caressing your face, making you look at him.

His beautiful purple eyes were almost completely engulfed in black, gazing back at you with more desire than you’d ever seen from someone else. “I love you.” Caleb cooed, blinking slowly at you. As sweet and pure those words were, his actions were nothing but. Your gege began to fuck his tongue in and out of your hole, eating you out earnestly while you moaned up a storm, exclusively for his ears. His nose was pressing up against your puffy clit, sending sparks of pleasure up your spine. You bucked your hips against his face, tight grip on his soft hair while you grinded against him. You heard him hum and groan against your cunt, pulling his tongue out of your fluttering pussy and sucking your sensitive bud into his mouth instead.

Your free hand gripped the sheets, tightening your hold on Caleb. You repeated his name like it was prayer, mewling and moaning. He was rocketing you toward another powerful orgasm while he let two of his thick fingers play and tease your entrance. “ Come on, baby. You're gonna cum for me again, right? Be good for me and hold on, okay?” Caleb purred, dipping his digits inside of your tight cunt. He groaned, feeling your wet walls clinging and fluttering around his fingers. He watched how you threw your head back, exposing the column of his neck and reminding him that he’d have to mark that up too before sending you back to work. “Just like that!” You squealed, his fingers rubbing against the spongy spot inside of you.

“Aah.. This spot feels nice for you, doesn’t it?” Caleb teased, slowly fucking his fingers inside of you until he was knuckle deep. “More. I-I need more, please.” . You squirmed, feeling so much more full than you’d ever been with your own fingers. Instead of responding verbally, he opted for sucking your clit back into his mouth while he fucked his fingers into your pussy at his pace. He closed his eyes for a few moments, listening to how your pussy squelched whenever he shoved his fingers inside or feeling how your cunt was literally dripping so much that his hand was soaked all the way down to his wrist. Whenever your cunt would start pulsating around his fingers, he’d slow down and lessen the suction around your clit.

“Caleb!” You whined, trying to grind against his face. “Why are you edging me? I want to cum!” He opened his eyes and looked at you, a dark look that was unfamiliar swimming in his orbs and that scared you a little. “You’ve let other men touch you, haven’t you? You let them defile your perfect self. Now that I got you right here, I’m gonna make sure that the only man you’ll ever think about is gonna be me and me only.” His possessive tone sounded exhilarating to you, his eyes looked unfocused and crazy while he glanced at you. “So, you’ll be a good girl and you’ll wait until I’m done feasting. Your pussy is mine, like the rest of your body.” You nodded furiously at his words, your pussy fluttering around his fingers. He continued edging you, bringing you close to your breaking point while he bit your inner thighs, licking his bites lovingly after each one. Bruises were already starting to form while the ache between your legs only seemed to grow.

“You’re being so good for your gege. You’re soaked for me, so close to cumming, hmm?” He asked, already knowing the answer but feeling the need to tease you further. You let out a string of curse and mumbled words, trying your hardest to muster up your words. Sadly for you, each time you tried to speak, Caleb would scissor his fingers inside of you and make you lose your train of thoughts.

“Do you want to cum, baby? You wanna cum on gege’s fingers, don’t you?” He asked, blowing air on your clit and watching you jolt. You nodded rapidly, the arousal so heavy that you almost felt drunk on it. “ Words, love.” Caleb noted. You did your best to think words up, feeling like he’d taken everything from you while he was fucking his fingers, in and out, of you. “Need to cum, please, Caleb? Let me cum for you. I promise you'll be the single man, no, person, in my mind. I-I need it, please.” You begged, tears threatening to roll down your flushed cheeks. Your childhood friend felt all the moisture in his mouth dry up, feeling you tighten up around his digits.

He resumed the relaxed pace he was using earlier, slowly increasing his speed while you moaned up a storm. You’d let go of Caleb’s hair to grip your breasts with both of your hands, rolling up your shirt and rolling your nipples in your fingers. Caleb’s neglected throbbing cock was aching painfully against his sweats, twitching every few seconds while he touched you. The sight of you fondling your own nipples was hotter than he’d ever imagined, so lewd and perverse. “Alright, love. You wanna cum for me? Let it all out for me. I’ll take what you got for me.” Caleb whispered, flicking his tongue against your clit before giving it a final suck and a nibble of his teeth.

Your back arched off the bed, a scream ripped out of your throat while you squirted against his face. Your vision faded to white, your heart buzzing in your ears while he had your edged out release all over his face and tongue. Your entire body was sticky, covered in sweat while your pussy spasmed wildly. “Good girl, what a good girl you are.” Caleb cooed, his breath shaky as he felt his cock throbbing hard in his pants, right on the verge of cumming. He fucked you through your orgasm, watching the tremors of your body slow down while you slowly began relaxing until you were limp in his grasp. “You taste so f’ckin good, babe.” He growled, lapping at your pussy. “C-caleb, stop or.. I n-need to go use the..” You gasped, feeling the painful pang of your filled bladder.

You didn’t need to finish your sentence. Caleb’s lips curled up in a grin, pressing his mouth against your pussy while he pressed his hand down at the base of your abdomen . A shocked sob escaped your lips, a weak stream of piss shooting out of your urethra and into his waiting mouth. The stream quickly turned larger, filling his mouth with the bitter liquid that Caleb swallowed down greedily. You wanted to be grossed out, really you did, but there was something so arousing about him wanting everything that came out of you.

With a loud pop and soft kiss on your pussy, he placed his chin on your mound and looked at you with his mouth still slightly full. His glittering purple eyes ,satisfied and hazy, with everything he’d squeezed out of you. His mouth was still half-full, slowly drinking all of you. You couldn’t just let him have this, your competitive nature rearing its head because of the stupid smug grin on his handsome face. “Come on, puppy. Swallow it all up. I didn’t mark my territory on your face for you to not drink it all up.” You breathed, caressing Caleb’s cheek and dragging your manicured nails on it.

Never did he think those sick depraved words would be all he needed to be pushed toward his own release, painting the inside of his sweatpants with thick ropes of creamy cum while his dick jerked and throbbed handsfree. “Good boy. You’re such a good boy, Caleb.” A lazy grin plastered on your face, watching how your gege’s face was twisted up in pleasure, his mouth slightly opened, his eyes squeezed tight. He panted against your skin, trying to steady himself, his legs feeling like jello.

It took him a little while but soon enough, he climbed up in bed with you even if his nether’s felt uncomfortable with his cooling release. Laying on his back, you straddled his hips and caught the confused look on his face. “Give me your phone.” You asked quietly. He didn’t question and handed it to you, watching how you fiddled with it for several minutes before handing it back to him. “What did you do, pips?” He asked, not even bothering to check your handy work as it would take away from his time admiring you.

“ I installed a tracker on your phone and deleted every single contact that isn’t relevant to your job.” You said, a slightly wild look piercing through your calm gaze. “You’re mine, Caleb. You don’t need anybody else but me, right? You don’t need to talk to anyone, just me.” Your obsession looked back at you, his smile slowly growing. The implication of what you’d just done sinking into him rapidly and his only reaction was to give you the biggest grin he could muster.

“Alright, pipsqueak. That’s only fair since I spy on you. Later, I’ll delete all the male contacts you got. If you need help on missions, wait for me instead of that Xavier guy you told me about. I hate other men talking to you. They can’t help you like I can.” Caleb sat, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulled you closer to him. You buried your face in his muscular neck, licking a stripe of it before sucking at the hot skin and biting it harshly.

“Aah,so now it’s your turn? Go on ahead, baby, mark me up. People need to be aware that I’m your property.” He moaned, putting his hand against the back of your head, tangling his fingers in your hair ,and keeping you there. Needless to say, Caleb felt himself growing harder quickly with your actions. You didn’t stop until he was covered in red, purple and blue bruises all over his neck, chest and..other parts. Your puppy though, loved every single moment and was nothing but a very good boy.

tag: @mcdepressed290

[5sospenguinqueen]

Surprise! | Charles Leclerc x Haas! Reader

Summary: Surprise! Charles got married without any of the Grid knowing. Surely his new wife can’t be the one driver who practically ignores his existence. 

Warnings: fluff, an inability to fully understand black cat energy 

Requested: yes by anon. apologies but it wouldn’t let me view the pins so i hope this matches your vision

Faceclaim: Leah Halton, and some random pinterest pics

F1 Masterlist

━━━━ ༻𖥸༺ ━━━━

its_yn just posted

liked by kevinmagnussen, lance_stroll and others

its_yn belgium 2024

8,558 comments

charles_leclerc lovely necklace

→ its_yn thanks. 

→ user1 he tries to hard but she makes it clear that she does not like him

→ user2 can you blame her if that’s what he counts as flirting liked by arthur_leclerc 

user3 caption really gives us the bare minimum of her media contract

user4 love how we get the basics from her. like yes, honey, give us nothing

kevinmagnussen i play a mean harmonica

→ its_yn sure

→ alex_albon she told me her ears were bleeding

→ kevinmagnussen i’d say she hurt my feelings but what else is new?

→ user5 can’t even be nice to her teammate 

haasf1team our two favourite people

user6 she gives off such black cat energy 

user7 people think she’s rude but she’s actually really shy with a dry sense of humour

→ user8 this! when you meet her, she’s so lovely but she goes really red

user9 we stan a low energy girly 

charles_leclerc just posted

liked by carlossainz55, lewishamilton and others

charles_leclerc spa day before the summer break

9,660 comments

user10 not charles posting a pic of him puling the same pose he hit when yn ignored him at the driver’s parade

→ user11 we love a self aware king

→ user12 no because the ducked head and the hair fiddle is literally what he did when she turned her back on him

user13 the things i would do to be y/n. i don’t know how she can resist 

→ user14 it’s almost funny because he tries so hard to flirt with her and she just doesn’t respond

user15 i’m not being delusional but i don’t think y/n was ignoring him. i think he made her shy

→ user16 i support you 100% because he grinned at her, she immediately turned and it looked like she was trying not to smile liked by charles_leclerc

→ user17 charles is just as delulu as we are 

━━━━ ༻𖥸༺ ━━━━

its_yn just posted

liked by charles_leclerc, oscarpiastri and others

its_yn summer break

6,099 comments

landonorris a smile would be nice

→ its_yn nothing in my life to smile about

→ charles_leclerc could i change that?

user1 i love that charles always comments on her posts and she barely ever responds

→ user2 she never even likes his posts, aside from the monaco one 

→ user3 the only one that matters 

arthur_leclerc he’s too busy freaking out about the flower being red; his symbolic colour

→ scuderiaferrari yes, drag his ass

→ haasf1team we also have red fyi

→ scuderiaferrari don’t make this about you 

user4 max and y/n are literally the definition of giving only what their contract demands

user5 guys, she’s on a yacht. who is well known for their yacht? charles leclerc 

→ user6 they’re millionaires. they probably all have one

→ user7 she said in a recent interview that she didn’t

charles_leclerc just posted

liked by its_yn, maxverstappen1 and others 

charles_leclerc my summer break was one to remember 

16,334 comments

user8 why has he used y/n’s filter on these pictures?

→ user9 coincidence, i think not

→ user10 she doesn’t own the filter

→ user9 yes she does

user11 wait, y/n liked this? this is only the second post of his that she’s ever liked 

→ user12 this feels significant and i can’t quite tell why

carlossainz55 what is this? you did not tell me about this?

→ carlossainz55 charles, hello?

alex_albon so our sim racing together meant nothing to you??

georgerussell63 we milk goats together and you don’t tell me you’re engaged

→ charles_leclerc *married

→ landonorris and you were the goats !

pierregasly i get not telling the others but to not even tell me??

→ charles_leclerc you gossip!

→ pierregasly with you! 

━━━━ ༻𖥸༺ ━━━━

its_yn just posted

liked by pierregasly, landonorris and others

its_yn you 🖤

10,144 comments

user1 pardon?

user2 so we don’t even know the basic info about this lady but we now know she has a partner?

→ user3 must be serious if she’s willing to share it with us

user4 can’t even make a joke about charles leclerc crying in his room because he’s married??

user5 i genuinely deluded myself in thinking charles and y/n would end up together but now he’s eloped and she’s soft launching some rando

user6 i want to live in the multiverse where charles and y/n are together

user7 but charles and y/n were meant to become the manifestation of the sunshine/grumpy trope

user8 it's the fact that arthur isn't even commenting/teasing charles

→ user9 we've truly lost what could've been

user10 is that an engagement ring??

charles_leclerc just posted

liked by alex_albon, f1 and others 

charles_leclerc what’s better than one leclerc? two! now that the season is done, we can go on our honeymoon baby

18,147 comments

its_yn ❤️❤️

→ user11 oh so she is just like that

→ user12 had us convinced she didn’t like our boy but she was so in love with him that she couldn't speak to him in public without blushing 

→ user13 she used his colour for the hearts instead of hers! 

→ user14 she’s so down bad 

landonorris omg we have an actual smile from y/n? the world must be ending 

→ its_yn shut up. let me be happy 

→ kevinmagnussen didn’t know you knew how to be

→ its_yn this is why you weren’t invited 

lilymhe lost my girl to a man who goes vroom

→ alex_albon excuse me?

→ charles_leclerc excuse me?

→ its_yn @/lilymhe 💋

scuderiaferrari can we hire your wife to make us more of those jackets?

→ haasf1team she’s already hired as our driver??

→ sucderiaferrari i think we’ve already proven that we get access to all leclerc’s. we’ll build her a seat or something

user15 everyone say thank you charles because he’s actually giving us loads of content of our girl, who usually gives us nothing

→ user16 and he’s making her more sociable, look how many times she’s commented on this post alone 

pierregasly i wish i was surprised but i knew i caught you kissing months ago! i just didn’t think she would marry you

→ charles_leclerc you have hurt my feelings 

→ its_yn @/pierregasly count your days

→ pierregasly i miss when you didn’t talk 

━━━━ ༻𖥸༺ ━━━━

Requests open but slow

tag list

@peachiicherries @rosecentury @c-losur3 @heavy-vettel @evie-119 @raizelchrysanderoctavius @lilorose25 @sillyfreakfanparty @justaf1girl @piastri-fvx @teamnovalak

[pomegranatesarchive]

two people that matched each others freak | max verstappen

pairing: max verstappen x teammate!reader

summary: max verstappen and y/n l/n love to match each others freak.

liked by, carlossainz, maxverstappen1, redbullracing and 692,028 others!

yourusername: what an unfortunate series of events. first crash kinda nervous 🥰🥰@/carlossainz kill yourself for what you did to me.

view comments below!

user1: LMAO THE CASUAL SELFIE AFTER THAT BIG ASS CRASH ??

user2: carlos deserves way more then a 5 place penalty after that…

user3: no literally ??? y/n is literally BLEEDING !!

maxverstappen1: yeah @/carlossainz. KILL YOURSELF.

user4: you tell ‘em max 🗣️🗣️

user5: queens first crash and it’s not even her fault 😞😞

user6: queens first crash and she almost DIES

user7: carlos hate club reunite !!!

user8: oh let’s not…

user9: to quote y/n: “accidents happen. i know carlos didn’t get into his car with the intention of hurting me. there’s no hard feelings whatsoever.”

carlossainz: IM SO SORRY Y/N.

yourusername: i only take apologies in cash and gift cards xx.

maxverstappen: i only take apologies in cash.

carlossainz: why would i apologize to you?

maxverstappen1: because you almost killed my bestfriend.

carlossainz: do you accept venmo?

user8: max still calling y/n his bestfriend even tho they’ve been dating for two years now is so ??

user9: they were bestfriends for 6 years before that so..

charles_leclerc: give us a big scare there l/n 😬 happy you’re okay!

yourusername: thank you charles ❤️ but because you are carlos teammate, i feel like i am also owed compensation from you as well.

maxverstappen1: yeah leclerc! pay up!!

charles_leclerc: text me the amount 😞

user10: i love how max just goes along with everything y/n says???

user11: we love a man who matches his gfs freak ❤️❤️

liked by charles_leclerc, carlossainz, redbullracing, and 720,629 others!

maxverstappen1: thank you to @/charles_leclerc and @/carlossainz for funding our date night 💙

view comments below!

user12: NO WAY

user13: CARLOS AND CHARLES ACTUALLY SENT THEM THE MONEY ???

user14: this is so cute 🥹

user15: yns so pretty 🙁

maxverstappen1: the prettiest 💙💙

user16: i just looked at my bf and sighed

charles_leclerc: ofc!! cute couple 🥰🥰

user17: charles definitely has a favorite couple

user18: y/n, my favorite nerd

user19: max, my favorite nerd lover

user20: perfect couple

user21: i have a theory that y/n and max are so happy together because they genuinely compliment each other so well

user21: they literally clicked as soon as they met, and they have said that “they feel at home” with each other, they can be their true selves when they’re together

user21: conclusion; i’m lonely and i wish i had a relationship like this

carlossainz: you’re welcome ig. am i forgiven now?

yourusername: we’ll see!

liked by 284,029 others!

f1gossip: throwback thursday!!! throwback to when max and y/n broke the internet, by announcing they were both no longer virgins..through cake.

view comments below!

user22: oh yes the good old days

user23: been matching each others freak since DAY ONE

user24: back when ynstappen was still not OFFICIALLY confirmed

user25: you should throwback to when max refused to resign with red bull until they gave y/n a multi-year contract ☺️☺️

user26: this was a CRAZY day for f1

user27: this connected the dots for all the ynstappen shippers because they basically confirmed they lost their virginity to EACHOTHER!!

user28: did we ever find out who’s idea this was?

user29: a couple months ago it was brought up and max spoke: “i know lots of people think it was yns idea..but it was actually mine. i guess i was just tired to hiding our relationship, so i brought it up, and y/n thought it was hilarious.”

user30: my parents ☝️☝️

user31: from teammates, to friends, to bestfriends, to lovers. living my dream.

user32: them.

user33: if they breakup i will genuinely never believe in love ever again.

user34: them becoming bestfriends was so unexpected, but made so much sense.

user35: if it weren’t for the ice cream shop they never would have happened ☹️

user36: pls explain?

user35: this is when y/n and max had just started the season as teammates, max hadnt performed his best at one of the races, coming in at 6th with y/n behind in 7th

user35: after the race, y/n had unexpectedly asked max to go get ice cream with her at a ice cream shop nearby

user35: max, feeling like he didn’t deserve to celebrate in anyway, declined. but y/n persisted, basically pulling him into that ice cream shop

user35: that’s when max said he truly had the time of his life, he felt happy, even though his race went horrible, he said that he has so much fun with yn and that he has never laughed so hard; the start of ynstappen ☹️

liked by maxverstappen1, redbullracing, landonorris, and 729,624 others!

yourusername: siri, play nasty by tinahe.

view comments below!

maxverstappen1: listening to it right now!

maxverstappen1: oh wow

maxverstappen1: i like this liefde!! 💙💙

maxverstappen1: come to the room so we can listen together!!

yourusername: coming!! 💙💙

landonorris: you are aware you can text privately right?

user36: THE ICE CREAM SHOP PICTURE

user37: he looks so happy 😭😭😭😭

user38: sobs

user39: y/n healing maxs inner child is something i KNEW i needed.

user40: power couple !!!

danielricciardo: i been a nasty girl, i been a nasty girl

user41: i need someone to love me like max loves y/n

landonorris: whos gonna match my freak 😣

user58: ME I WILL PLS LANDO I WILL

user42: the first picture?? 😭😭

user43: omg the second picture. i’m going to throw up with joy. i love you guys.

user44: ynstappen ships used to PRAY for days like these.

liked by, yourusername, redbullracing, danielricciardo, and 829,924 others!

maxverstappen1: i’ll match her freak!!! i will !!!

view comments below!

user45: yes max, we know

user46: i just looked at my boyfriend and sighed

user47: the shirt???

maxverstappen1: @/danielricciardo thank you for the shirt :D i love it 💙

user48: i’m totally ready for max to wear that shirt on race day…

yourusername: the perfect photographer 🥰

maxverstappen1: it’s easy when my muse is perfect ☺️☺️

user49: that SHOULD BE ME.

user50: con🥹gra🥹tula🥹tions

user51: no one will ever understand how much i love this couple

user52: we love a man who matches his gfs energy ❗️❗️❗️

user53: so happy for you guys! haha. ha. ha. so happy.

charles_leclerc: beautiful shirt mate!

user54: the way charles and max still don’t follow each other but this is charles every time max post:

user55: oh! such a cute shirt! haha, ha, i’m so lonely.

user56: max could do better

maxverstappen1: kill yourself you worthless piece of garbage

user57: y’all saying you miss mad max but he makes an appearance every time someone says something negative about y/n 😭

. . .

notes: took a small break to enjoy my summer break start!! but i’m back, request are open !!

[checkeredflagggs]

Unsolved

Pairing: charles leclerc x podcaster!reader

summary: when charles admits to listening to unsolved, Ferrari take it upon themselves to play matchmaker

a/n: Hope everyone has a good 2025!

a/n2: I made up all of these murders and mysteries. My bad if they’re actually real

scuderiaferrari

liked by yourprivate, maxverstappen1, arthur_leclerc, and 3,138,723 others

scuderiaferrari: Carlos and Charles took the stage today to answer fans’ questions!

view all comments

user1: god do they look good

↳user2: i knnnnnoooowwwww

↳user1: gnawing at the bars of my enclosure right now ngl

user3: loved the little baking lesson that Carlos had going on there at one point

↳user4: god can we get charles to take notes???

↳arthur_leclerc: it wouldn’t help

↳charles_leclerc: stop lying! I can cook

↳arthur_leclerc: you can’t

↳user4: we saw that pasta video…unless you’ve gotten vastly better no you can’t

user5: my big surprise takeaway was that charles also listens to unsolved? He seems like that would be too scary for him tbh

↳user6: listen that man has been in Ferrari for years now

↳user6: listen to the horrors? No no no. He lives with them. He is them

↳user7: alrighty there Mr. Philosophy. Chill

user8: ok but did you see his blush when they asked why he liked unsolved?

↳user9: YES! I think the mans likes the podcaster, not the podcast!

↳user8: can you blame him? They’re hot af

user10: ok but i feel like this is the start of a meet cute? liked by charles_leclerc, yourprivate

↳user10: did??? Did Charles just like my comment???

↳arthur_leclerc: 😆😆😆😆

unsolved

liked by charles_leclerc, pierregasly, maxverstappen1, and 724,293 others

unsolved: Let’s talk death and disappearances this month — three cases spread across 3 states and 3 decades that have never been solved that starts and ends in Boston! Lisa Miller, …more

view all comments

user11: chilling…

user12: ok but why do they match so well…did you just somehow connect these 3 murders?

user13: damn do the fbi need to hire you. liked by the fbi

↳user13: wait what???

maxverstappen1: good stuff 👍🏻

↳user14: what in the earth is this crossover???

↳user15: vroom vroom guys listen to murder mystery podcast??

↳charles_leclerc: NO. NO WE DONT

↳unsolved: shame 😞

↳charles_leclerc: no wait wait wait. I DO! They don’t.

↳pierregasly: 😂😂

↳user16: what in the world…

oscarpiastri: interesting, interesting…

↳charles_leclerc: SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP

↳oscarpiastri: that’s no way to speak to your son…

↳user17: what is going on in the House of Commons???

↳unsolved: that’s what we would like to know as well…

↳charles_leclerc: ABSOLUTELY NOTHING IS HAPPENIGN!!

Private Emails

scuderiaferrari

liked by charles_leclerc, carlossainz55, unsolved, and 2,133,464 others

tagged: unsolved

scuderiaferrari: COTA here we come…with a mysterious guest!

view all comments

user18: OH MY GOD did they really invite the unsolved podcaster Charles has been not so secretly thirsting over???

↳user19: they did! I bet it’s gonna be a really interesting race…

charles_leclerc: we look forward to seeing you!

↳user20: how long did it take you to type that out and not completely freak??

↳arthur_leclerc: longer than you think possible!

this comment was deleted

↳carlossainz55: his face was redder then our cars

this comment was deleted

↳pierregasly: I was fielding panicked calls all day. You have no idea

this comment was deleted

↳maxverstappen1: I just took his phone and did it for him 😂

this comment was deleted

user21: my fingers are crossed. I am sat. Please please please give us a good episode of unsolved with Charles and Carlos. You don’t understand my NEED for this to happen

↳user21: god I’m just imaging something like their prison episode from 2 years ago? Like spooky and creepy to the extreme!

↳user22: sorry but can you explain? I’m new to unsolved and am working backwards!

↳user21: of course! So about 2/2.5 years ago the unsolved crew camped out in a decommissioned prison with a ghost hunter group (I forgot their name sorry!)

↳user21: while the hunters were, you know, searching for ghosts, the unsolved crew were doing an in-depth study on all the creepy and dangerous murders that happened in the prison!

↳user21: it was a really fun crossover episode!

↳user22: oh! That’s so cool! And austion has some pretty haunted places — maybe they’ll do it again here!

unsolved has posted 3 stories

[COTA here I come!] [beautiful!] [The setting for tonight!]

user23 replied I’m so excited!

scuderiaferrari replied glad to see you on the way!

↳unsolved thanks for setting this up!

↳unsolved I’m very excited!

user24 replied oh my god that’s such a pretty photo!

user25 replied go get your man

↳unsolved whaat??

↳user25 oh my god you don’t know??

↳unsolved ???

↳user25 oh this is gonna be funny af

scuderiaferrari replied …you’ll have both our drivers back in one piece right??

↳unsolved of course!

charles_leclerc replied that’s…that’s where we are staying??

↳unsolved yup!

Bluesky

Bluesky

unsolved

liked by charles_leclerc, arthur_leclerc, sebastionvettel, maxverstappen1, and 1,231,122 others

tagged: charles_leclerc, carlossainz55, scuderiaferrar, spiritsleuths

unsolved: only 1 driver was hurt in the making of this video and his name was…Jasper White! Thanks to scuderiaferrari for loaning us their drivers to make this amazing video that took a long look at some of the most haunting deaths in this local Austin landmark! And thanks to the Spirit Sleuths for helping us out last night!

view all comments

user26: spooky…

↳user27: it feels unreal that there were so many deaths in one place in such quick succession…

oscarpiastri: glad to see you made it though the night

↳charles_leclerc: of course I did! There was no problems whatsoever

↳unsolved: I’m pretty sure I have a couple of hours of video that show you screaming and clutching at me to prove that wrong…

↳charles_leclerc: you don’t ☺️☺️☺️

↳maxverstappen1: ohhh share?

↳unsolved: that’s no footage I guess

↳pierregasly: shame

↳charles_leclerc: thank you 😊

↳user19: hmmmmm user53??

↳user53: i see it. I see it

arthur_leclerc: ok but how many drivers were screaming???

↳unsolved: all of them!

↳charles_leclerc: no! Just 1 🥹🥹

↳unsolved: sorry just one!

↳carlossainz55: compañero?

↳charles_leclerc: just 1!!!

↳unsolved: sorry 🤗

↳user19: hmmmmm

↳user53: adding it to the folder now

user28: that was such a fun episode!

↳spiritsleuths: just wait for our cut of the night!

↳user28: I’m sitting. I’m sat. I’m ready.

sebastionvettel: never thought I’d see the day after that incident in 2019

↳landonorris: share!

↳oscarpiastri: don’t you mean the inchident

↳maxverstappen1: another inchident??

↳carlossainz55: it was for a love interest

this comment was deleted

↳charles_leclerc: this time it won’t be just an inchident

scuderiaferrari

liked by yourprivate, charles_leclerc, arthur_leclerc, oscarpiastri, and 2,293,124 others

tagged: charles_leclerc

scuderiaferrari: And that’s our COTA winner Charles Leclerc!

view all comments

yourprivate: Where's the trophy? He just comes running over to me

↳charles_leclerc: who are we to fight the alchemy?

user29: man he moves fast

↳charles_leclerc: very fast!

↳charles_leclerc: not letting this chance escape me!

↳user29: oh my god im so jealous right now

↳yourprivate: 🤭🤭🤭

carlossainz55: congrats mate!

↳charles_leclerc: you too!

↳charles_leclerc: for both reasons!!

↳carlossainz55: shush!

↳user30: oh??? user19, user53???

↳user19: …I’m on it

↳user53: I’ll start the coffee

↳user31: COFFEE??!?? ARE YOU GUYS TOGETHER???????

↳user53:WHAT NO? AHAT? SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP

↳user19: I DONT KNOW AHAT YOURE TAKKING ABOU AHAHAHA

↳user32: user19 user53 act normal challenge — failed

pierregasly: thank god. Now stop texting me asking how to ask them out

↳charles_leclerc: stop. talking.

↳yourprivate: awww were you nervous?

↳pierregasly: if nervous includes texting me over 200 times in an hour with different pick up lines and selfies asking how his hair and outfit looked?

↳pierregasly: yes

↳charles_leclerc: im going to run you over 😄

↳scuderiaferrari: you can’t actually say that Charles!

↳charles_leclerc: for legal reasons this was (not) a joke

↳charles_leclerc: 😁😁😁

↳pierregasly: …I don’t like that emoji calmar

↳charles_leclerc: 😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁

user33: the way he sprinted over to her…

↳user34: I have NEVER been so jealous as I am right now

↳yourprivate: ehehehehehe

↳user34: ok no need to rub it our faces

↳yourprivate: why wouldn’t I?

↳charles_leclerc: 🥰🥰🥰🥰

↳yourprivate: 😘😘😘😘❤️❤️❤️❤️

↳user34: right in front of my salad???

user35: wow that highway is calling my name tonight…

↳user36: sleepover!

[beloveds-embrace]

Fuck it, we ball, I hope that disrespectful anon gets hemorrhoids and they can't get them removed until next year, AND that their insurance doesn't cover it. I'm here thinking about your Omega idea where omegas normally do the pursuing, but with a slight twist; the boys being the omegas. An alpha who is for sure down bad for the boys, but thinks "ah, theyre out of my league, I should be aiming lower, manage my expectations". Only 141 is just as down bad for them, and they're doing everything just short of screaming "PICK UP ON THE HINTS, COME INTO OUR HOUSE AND BEDS AND LIVES AND STAY FOREVER PLEASE"

Johnny is about to say fuck decorum and just show up in reader's house wearing nothing but a ribbon and a tag that says 'free to a good home' (your home is the good one, please keep him, there is no receipt so you can't return him).

Price has the brain cell normally in terms of trying to gently coax you into getting you to say you're into them, he has a 15 step plan that may or may not involve using his various contacts to get you spending more time in close proximity to them. Also he for some reason is always baking, he always comes over asking you for sugar? (He'll take any kind of 'sugar' you're willing to offer, he loves making a variety of cream pies)

Gaz is always gently inviting them to attend 'friend' things, things that could be a date but that he can excuse as 'well we're coworkers/friends/neighbors, we should get along :)'. It's just a coincidence that various other people seem to bail except for any of the other boys, now why don't you sit beside him so you guys can share popcorn at the movies (you both always seem to be reaching for it at the same time, if your fingers touched anymore you might as well be holding hands)

Simon is chasing off any omegas he thinks are a threat to them getting reader, that is THEIR alpha, paws OFF (rip to anyone reader was halfheartedly going on dates with, this man is gonna become those people's sleep paralysis demon)

Hope you enjoy!! :3 💕💕 i lovedddd writing this sm omg

See, the thing is, you’d always thought of yourself as a decent Alpha. Not overbearing, not egotistical, not a demanding freak- just capable and steady. But you weren’t extraordinary. Not the kind of Alpha Omegas like them would look at twice. And so, while you worked alongside the men of Task Force 141 you convinced yourself to be content with just admiring them from a distance.

You couldn’t help it. They were perfect, as far as you were concerned. Perfect, and fully out of your league.

Surely, Omegas like them would want someone better. Someone stronger. You’d told yourself that so many times it was practically your mantra, the only way you’d be able to stop yourself from pursuing them. They deserved someone more charismatic, more confident- an Alpha who could match their brilliance. Not someone like you, fumbling through conversations with them, struggling to keep your feelings in check.

But they’d already decided. They didn’t need a flashy Alpha or someone who tried too hard. What they wanted was you. The only problem? You didn’t seem to realize it, no matter how obvious they made it.

John took the lead, naturally. He knew you were cautious and perhaps a little insecure when it came to relationships (it was fucking visible in you, silly Alpha. He scoffs each time you draw back, frustrated), so he made it his mission to draw you in- slowly and subtly. His plan was meticulous: get you comfortable, build trust, and create opportunities for you to spend more time with them so you’d see that they only want you.

Maybe then you’d break out of that stupid shell you’ve put yourself in.

He’d started baking regularly, a habit you hadn’t even known he had. At least once a week, he’d show up at your place with a tin of cookies, a loaf of fresh bread, or a perfectly golden pie. “Thought I’d share,” he’d say casually, though the slight smirk tugging at his lips told a different story. He peers at you, letting his scent coil just a bit more. “I hope you don’t mind the amount of cream. I happen to like cream pies a lot.”

The way to an Alpha’s heart is through their stomach, and all that.

If he wasn’t offering you baked goods, he was asking for your help to make said baked goods. “Ran out of sugar again,” he’d sigh, handing you an empty container. “Mind sparing a bit?”

It was ridiculous, downright unbelievable how often he supposedly ran out of baking supplies. But his visits became a highlight of your week, and the lingering looks he gave you left your heart pounding long after he was gone.

The one time he’d handfed you, watching you lick the syrup from his fingers with half-lidded eyes, still lives in your mind rent-free.

Kyle took a softer, more personal approach. He wasn’t above using the pretense of friendship to spend time with you, often inviting you to casual dates- grabbing coffee, going to the movies, or just walking through town and shopping. Every invitation was framed innocently, but there was always a little extra effort behind it. He’d pick a movie he knew you’d like, suggest places he knew you’d find interesting, and ensure that others you unfortunately knew joined just enough to make it seem less like a date.

Somehow, though, those other people always mysteriously canceled. It was never anything dramatic- just a sudden cold, a scheduling conflict, or a “something came up, sorry.” Eventually, it would be just you and a very smug Kyle, sitting close enough that your knees brushed or reaching for popcorn at the same time. Once, right as the bowl emptied and you both reached for it, Kyle simply thought fuck it and held your hand.

On one occasion, you both shared a bowl of spaghetti and ended up with the scene from the Lady and the Tramp.

It was so painfully obvious to everyone.

Except you.

“It’s not a coincidence,” Kyle muttered to Johnny one evening after you left, both of them sitting in the spot you were in, bathing in the leftover warmth and scent. “How can they not notice?”

Speaking of Johnny; he’s barely keeping himself together. Subtlety in missions are a must sometimes, but he doesn’t want to that with you anymore. He was just so, so, so frustrated with your obliviousness. What more does he need to do to show you that he- that they- want you?

He’s been dropping so many hints; half-jokes about Omegas waiting begging to be swept off their feet, suggestive winks when you compliment him in that lovely, adoring tone of yours. Once, while watching a romantic tv show, he’d sighed loudly and very pointedly said: “If only someone would claim me.”

“If ye don’t figure it out soon,” he growled at the others one night, pacing back and forth like a wild beast and probably on his way to leave a dent in the carpet, “I’m showin’ up at their doorstep with nothin’ but a red bow, like some bloody Christmas prezzie, I swear to god.”

John sighs, rolling his eyes. “You do that, and I’m leaving you on their porch.”

“That’s exactly what I’m askin’ for!”

Simon took the quietest but most direct approach. Just not exactly direct towards you. While the others worked to get closer to you, Simon focused on eliminating what he saw as obstacles: other Omegas who thought you were free for the taking. It didn’t matter if they were serious or just someone you’d gone on a casual date with- Simon saw them all as threats.

He didn’t have to say much to scare them off. A single cold glare from across the room, sharp bursts of his scent, or a low, menacing comment was usually enough to send them packing. He didn’t care if it was excessive.

You were his Alpha. You were their Alpha, and no one else had a right to you.

But even Simon softened when it came to you. He couldn’t put all his thoughts, all his feelings into words, so he did them with his actions. Quiet protectiveness, gentle, careful touches. Moments of fleeting vulnerabilities shared between you and him.

He was always there for you. Even if you didn’t know you need him with you.

Still, despite all their efforts, you remained convinced that they weren’t interested.

In the end, to no one’s surprise, it’s Johnny who snaps. Johnny, so close to his heat, so absolutely done with your obliviousness and the Omegas that aren’t them talking with you when you should be only focused on them.

He doesn’t care; leaves the carefully made nest with your stolen shirts and none of the others stop him when he just. Drags your surprised self to the nest.

“Johnny! You-“

“I want you.” He hisses, bares his teeth all sharp and desperate. “We want you. And damn it, we will have you.”

And well, who are you to even say no when this is all you have wanted?

[astonmartinii]

ice, ice baby (literally) | max verstappen social media au

pairing: max verstappen x raikkonen!reader

the ice man may have never spoken, but his daughter never shuts the fuck up

based on the request from @blue-skyandstars

MASTERLIST | TIP JAR

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, sebastianvettel and 783,409 others

yourusername: taking names and kicking asses (and getting all assignments in on time with an appropriate amount of ass licking)

view all comments

user1: i love how she is so clearly kimi's daughter

user2: the only two blondes that don't freak me out

user3: insert that paris hilton clip "can i have two more of these little blonde bitches?"

maxverstappen1: what's an appropriate amount of ass licking and can i demonstrate on you?

maxverstappen1: wait! who said that?

yourusername: in your dreams car boy

maxverstappen1: trust me i see you in my dreams all the time

yourusername: so that's why you're always in the shower when i call you in the morning....

user4: i'm new here, are they together?

yourusername: wouldn't you like to know weather boy

maxverstappen1: she's actually my sleep paralysis demon, sorry to say

user5: they're so unserious

kimiraikkonen: keep those studies up i'm paying the bills

yourusername: i promise to use my status as a nepo baby for good papa 🫡

kimiraikkonen: proud of you.

user6: we love a self aware girly

user7: the raikkonen household really is the best balance, a guy who acts like talking causes him physical pain and a girl who couldn't shut the fuck up if she tried

yourusername: no way i'd rather it be

charles_leclerc: how many versions of that shirt do you have?

yourusername: enough...

charles_leclerc: and i'm the one who is a threat to national security when i go shopping

yourusername: that trouser collection should get you on some sort of list

user8: all these f1 drivers in her likes and comments and she's not cuffed... why is she fumbling so bad

yourusername: am I fumbling or are THEY?

user9: expose the dms please

yourusername: that would not be pg13 soz!

maxverstappen1

liked by kimiraikkonen, landonorris and 1,094,556 others

tagged: yourusername

maxverstappen1: oh look who decided to come back

view all comments

user10: max is so annoyed that she decided to go to school in the us that he makes all american fans lives hell by winning all the races

user11: so true of him

landonorris: matching books? you're such a simp

maxverstappen1: is a man forbidden to be in a book club? who backwards of you lando

yourusername: just because you can't read, don't take it out on us

landonorris: i can read!

yourusername: name the last book you read

yourusername: and that doesn't include searching your name on twitter

landonorris: can you go back already, you're so mean

yourusername: don't come for our two man book club if you can't handle the smoke

maxverstappen1: what she said

user12: i love how spring break starts and y/n doesn't even go to see her dad, straight to max

maxverstappen1: kimi is coming! i am NOT a bad friend who deprives y/n of her dad

user12: you're also scared of kimi

maxverstappen1: i'm also scared of kimi

danielricciardo: you're in my building and i don't get any baked goods... i see how it is

yourusername: as if max is allowed to eat them anyway they're for dad

danielricciardo: i promptly take back anything i've ever said

user13: max has got to be down bad to have that much baking equipment in his house when it's canon he can barely cook eggs

yourusername: if he wanted to he would

user14: is this confirmation?

yourusername: i hope those are paper straws you're grasping at

maxverstappen1: why wouldn't i make sure i have the equipment to get my worker bee to make me sweet treats (don't read that rupert)

user15: i'm on to you two ... there's something shady going on here

sebastianvettel

liked by kimiraikkonen, maxverstappen1 and 1,209,409 others

tagged: yourusername

sebastianvettel: she's too old, i miss when she was a nice and polite child

view all comments

user19: annual god father seb appearance

user20: y/n please work your magic to get him to a race this weekend

yourusername: i'm working on it! watch out for suzuka

user21: the people's princess truly

yourusername: rude! i am a very polite young woman 🙁

sebastianvettel: yes you are, but also when you were ten you didn't bother me with your love life

sebastianvettel: and you weren't so fussy with food

yourusername: I AM NOT FUSSY I JUST HAVE AN ACQUIRED TASTE

sebastianvettel: you asked me to uninvite lewis to our dinner plans because you "hate that quinoa shit, i'm hungry enough to kill a horse with my bare hands"

yourusername: and i'd say it again!

lewishamilton: first of all: rude. second of all: i knew there was a reason you and max get on so well - BLAND

maxverstappen1: just because my food doesn't turn my shit green or couldn't accidentally be sold in the rabbit section of the pet store doesn't make me BLAND

yourusername: i don't trust a man who makes non-alocholic tequila THE FACT IT GETS YOU DRUNK IS THE BEST PART OF THE TEQUILA ONLY WEIRDOS DRINK TEQUILA FOR THE TASTE

lewishamilton: gasp! you said you liked it!

yourusername: i try to be supportive okay :(

user22: well that was something

user23: max always coming to the rescue ... makes you think

charles_leclerc: i am sensing some blatant favouritism here

mickschumacher: i never get invited on baking weekends :(

yourusername: snooze you lose ladies

sebastianvettel: this is exactly what i mean y/n

yourusername: my bad! i'm sorry my god father loves me more than you :p get well soon

sebastianvettel: that's not-

charles_leclerc: consider yourself in beef

yourusername: it's on babe

user24: gosh i'm so confused WHO THE FUCK DO I WANT TO GET WITH HER

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, kimiraikkonen and 809,445 others

yourusername: boy, oh, boy am i ready to finish this semester

view all comments

user26: i see tulips i do deduce that they are from max verstappen 🤓👆

user27: i hate you invasive leeches (i believe this and it is now my personal headcanon)

maxverstappen1: SEAT BELT PLEASE

yourusername: i swear i did 😫

maxverstappen1: you need to protect the precious goods

landonorris: you never tell me that 🙁

maxverstappen1: you're not precious goods, hope this helps x

landonorris: i see how it is

yourusername: don't hate the player, hate the game lando

user28: they've either got the single most flirtatious friendship ever to exist or they're together

user29: if they are just friends and those flowers are from her actual gf - i am not being dramatic but i would take a long walk off a short plank

user30: i feel like they'd be the ultimate cockblocks for each other 😭

kimiraikkonen: proud of you bub

yourusername: i am losing hair from academic stress i hope you're happy papa

kimiraikkonen: i am 👍🏻

yourusername: i am losing hair - LOSING HAIR THIS IS A BIG DEAL YOU PAY FOR MY APPOINTMENTS

kimiraikkonen: you need a college education so you're not wasting all of my money - i also pay your sorority dues so be nice to me

yourusername: i'm tired let me be the low effort nepo baby i am meant to be

user31: can kimi raikkonen pay for my hair appointments too?

jensonbutton: is that MY CAR?

yourusername: you put me on the insurance?

jensonbutton: yeah for when your car was in the shop - i thought shelby was still in my garage?

yourusername: not to victim blame but having so many cars you don't notice one is gone, that's on you

jensonbutton: @KIMIRAIKKONEN YOUR KID STOLE MY CAR

yourusername: britt gave me the keys !!!!!!

kimiraikkonen: you got duped by a 21 year old, that's not my fault

user32: kimi when y/n jokes about dropping out 🤨 kimi when y/n steals one of jenson's cars 🥹

maxverstappen1

liked by kimiraikkonen, landonorris and 2,305,689 others

tagged: yourusername

maxverstappen1: ice, ice baby (except you're smoking hot)

view all comments

user35: WHOOP WHOOP LET'S FUCKING GO

user36: max already having the approval of kimi, that's my king

maxverstappen1: make no mistake i went to the raikkonen household with many offerings before i asked for his permission

user37: and if he had said no?

maxverstappen1: i would've asked y/n regardless 🫡

kimiraikkonen: 🤨

maxverstappen1: uh? i'm digging my own grave but i love your daughter so that's all the matters right? RIGHT?

kimiraikkonen: 🙄

maxverstappen1: WOULD IT KILL YOU TO USE THE KEYBOARD I'M HAVING A NERVOUS BREAKDOWN HERE

user38: the way max got given approval on live tv with more words than we've heard from kimi at any point in his career and he's still a shaking mess

user39: anxious girl representation

yourusername: you melted this icicle

maxverstappen1: eh i think you've always been a softy

charles_leclerc: like softserve ice cream? shop @lec now!

maxverstappen1: do you fucking mind?

yourusername: really? on the post of my boyfriend professing his love?

charles_leclerc: god forbid a guy chases the bag (also he called you smoking hot, that's hardly a profession of love)

maxverstappen1: you little rat

yourusername: lifetime supply of lec and a flavour named after us and consider yourself forgiven

charles_leclerc: i don't need your approval that much

yourusername: @kimiraikkonen @sebastianvettel you seeing this shit?

charles_leclerc: fine... weaponising your dad and god father is a low blow

yourusername: also! i love you baby - thank you for putting up with my constant yapping xx

maxverstappen1: i love you even more, i can't wait for you to finish college so i never have to share you ever again

kimiraikkonen: 🤨

maxverstappen1: AND YOUR LOVELY FAMILY

yourusername: they love you really maxy don't worry

yourusername

liked by sebastianvettel, jensonbutton and 1.945,440 others

tagged: maxverstappen1

yourusername: i'm so talented, i brought three more championships to the family without even getting into the car

view all comments

user40: okay idk why yall were shipping anyone else, i've seen one picture of them being cute and am sold

user41: i'm so convinced this happened cause max saw people were convinced she was with other people on the grid and he had to mark his territory

maxverstappen1: yes i was jealous but can you blame me? prettiest girl in the world actually wanted me back. i will not fumble this

user42: i need my man to be this down bad for me

kimiraikkonen: cute.

yourusername: thank you papa xxx

maxverstappen1: THANK YOU KIMI, LOVE YOU KIMI

yourusername: i think he gets it babe...

maxverstappen1: first time i've got a non-emoji answer, i will savour it

user43: oh my i love them your honour

sebastianvettel: happy for you guys, see you guys soon

yourusername: love you seb!

maxverstappen1: thanks for the vote of confidence seb

sebastianvettel: you may be a literal nightmare child, but you're our nightmare child now

kimiraikkonen: what he said

maxverstappen1: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH (i am ignoring that you called me a nightmare child, i was 17 give me a break)

yourusername: you guys he's crying hahahahahah

maxverstappen1: i just love you guys (y/n more)

yourusername: i love you too xx

user44: so liked now we've got the relationship reveal... when do we get both y/n and kimi in the red bull garage

user45: lets up the stakes and get max, kimi and seb in the 24 hours of le mans

yourusername: oh now you've started it - he's already on the phone to adrian

maxverstappen1: am i the first nepotism boyfriend?

kimiraikkonen: you might be the favourite of the in-laws if you get me a le mans win

maxverstappen1: y/n is an only child? i'm the only in law?

kimiraikkonen: yes?

maxverstappen1: I'M ON THE PHONE TO ADRIAN

yourusername: did i just lose my boyf to my dad?

fin.

note: babe the writer's block is back. but i'm fighting it. hope yall enjoyed this!

[monzabee]

short n' sweet (social media au) - op81

masterlist ||

Summary: The one where in an attempt to figure out who Y/N is dating, the internet come up with theories only to realise she is dating none other than Oscar Piastri and chaos ensues.

Pairing: oscar piastri x pop star!reader (model used: sabrina carpenter) (and domingooo)

Warnings: cursing (i think), sabrina carpenter is horny but it's okay we ride with it, feat the internet being the internet, i have a big fat crush on mercello hernandez so you have been warned

Auhtor note: came all this way, had to explain, direct from @percervall; mar this one is for you, i haven't had this much fun in a long time so thank you for indulging my brainrot and excitement😭🫶

Please also note that all of my works are protected under copyright, and not available for reposting on other platforms.

yourusername

Liked by elleusa, taylorswift, gracieabrams and 3,255,376 others

yourusername: toto, i have a feeling we're not in kansas anymore. short'n sweet cumming to a city near you! first stop: columbus, ohio

user: bro just give me ONE chance

user: SHE'S GORGEOUS ❤️❤️❤️❤️

user: te amo diva

user: don't know if i wanna be with her or i wanna be her

view all 5,594 comments.

user: see you tomorrow pookie

user: cant wait to see u 🫶🏼✨🤍

user: she’s the sweetest & shortest 💋

user: it’s Y/N's world and we’re just living in it😭🤍🤍💋💋💋

user: is he talking about TOTO FUCKING WOLFF??

user: why is f1 everywhere, no she isn't😭

tiktokuser1

caption: bed chem from opening night!!

user: that mic is ON! ✨

user: I LOVE THIS DIVA!!

user: watching this isn’t enough, I have to be there

user: I need that bed.. NEOWWW

user: SHE BETTER BRING THE DAMN TOUR TO AUSTRALIA CAUSE THE FOMO IS CRAZY

user: oh i think she'll be bringing the tour to australia alright

user: what does that mean??

user: what do you know!!

tiktokuser2

caption: YO I DON'T KNOW WHAT IS HAPPENING BUT SHORT N' SWEET TOUR IS THAT GIRL!!

user: 'have you ever tried this one?' ugh her mind😭

user: IS THIS THE NEW NONESENSE OUTRO FOR THIS TOUR I NEED TO KNOW

user: i can't take my eyes off this, i've been staring at it for the past five minutes!

user: okay diva we see you👀

yourusername

Liked by madisonbeer, oscarpiastri, haileybieber and 4,182,928 others

yourusername: hello l.a., are you ready to wrap it up?

user: OSCAR JACK PIASTRI WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

user: okay who is he and why is he lurking in my diva's likes?

user: MY QUEEN (me typing this while listening to espresso 👀)

user: just a girl living life and making everyone fall in love with her

user: i’m 26 and AFRAID of Y/N Y/LN

view all 7,011 comments.

user: the caption and the last pic with the kittens the vibes don't match i love you😭

yourusername: stoppp, i diee

user: how is this tour like halfway over ????? second leg of tour maybe???? 😭

tiktokuser3

caption: have you ever tried this one?

user: i don't know how she keeps coming up with these

user: imagine having this much freak, i wouldn't be able to leave my house

user: am i the only one who is excited for the last three shows in la??

user: her boyfriend is one lucky guy that's for sure

user: she has a boyfriend??

user: girl who do you think the guy in the white jacket and the thick accent is?

tiktokuser4

caption: omg guys😭😭 domingo is here😭😭

user: CAME ALLL THIS WAAY HAD TO EXPLAAAIN

user: deerect from domingoo

user: okay hear me out... mercello and Y/N??

user: noooo, this crossover is actually too insane i can't handle it

user: look at how he's looking at her bro's down bad😭

tiktokuser5

caption: WE'VE LOST HER TO DOMINGO GUYS

user: somebody call kyle and tell him the good news😭

user: who's kyle?

user: omg do you live under a rock or something?

user: am i the only one who thinks they are not dating?

yourusername

Liked by tiktok, oscarpiastri, marcellohdz and 3,669,817 others

yourusername: LA night 2 ♥️💋 second locationnnn maybe he’s biiii!!! see you tonight for our last show of the US leg :’) how the hell

user: God bless your Dad’s genetics, Domingo

user: OMG DOMINGOOO… “NOW SHES WITH A HOT GUY BUT HE LOOKS GAY, HEARD HIS NAMES DOMINGO”

user: DOMINGO IS CHEATING ON KELSEY

user: no hate to domingo, but oscar jack piastri liked this post under 1 minute😭😭

user: i think we've established that she is probably dating marcello, please stop with the delulu

user: Y/N IM HERE👹

view all 5,179 comments.

user: marcelo hernandez had the opportunity to do the funniest thing ever… and he did

user: the budget for this tour is insane… feels like a literal broadway production

user: came all this way, let her explain deeerect from LA

yourusername

Liked by oscarpiastri, madisonbeer, marcellohdz and 4,928,234 others

yourusername: date night but make it our way tagged: oscarpiastri

user: i'm sorrryyyy, but the dress is giving andie andersonn

yourusername: princess sophia is having some fun tonightt

user: this is still the most mind boggling couple ever BUT YOU LOOK GOOD THO

user: i'm so normal about this, i am sooooo normal about this

user: it's giving ross from friends and i am here for it

user: the best hard launch in the history of hard launches

oscarpiastri: great show, even better after party

yourusername: why did i know you were going to comment this

oscarpiastri: i'm literally sitting right next to you and you saw me type it

user: unhinged gf x calm bf duo is superior and this is the biggest proof ever

view all 6,728 comments.

marcellohdz: but what about domingo...

yourusername: i'm sorry domingo...

user: but is mark webber still alive, MARK ARE YOU THERE

oscarpiastri

Liked by yourusername, landonorris, mclaren and 928,256 others

oscarpiastri: came all this way, had to explain... tagged: yourusername

yourusername: 100% recommend, 5-star service

oscarpiastri: 😐

yourusername: 🥰

user: mister oscar jack piastri god bless your dad's genetics indeed

user: world class driving, world class relationship reveal

landonorris: okay but do we get free concert tickets ooor?

oscarpiastri: 😐

yourusername: of course!

user: this is actually so cute i'm going to throw up

view all 3,156 comments.

user: have you ever tried this one just took a whole other meaning

user: wait, are we going to see them together in las vegas??

user: the hard launching is insaneee