#otherwise this is gonna kill me | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

peribirb · 2 months ago

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i have to start looking faggier...

#seven months of estrogen and i still hate presenting myself in public #not like I'm even trying tbh but on my best days i look like a Kinda Fruity Cis Guy #i need to get out of here i need the wiggle room to actually learn who i am #otherwise this is gonna kill me #i need to be able to connect with other queers but i have a wardrobe that's barely changed since high school #I'm a GIRL now and I'm blowing my chances to actually appear as a girl #i don't even care how well i pass in detail i just want people to file me under the Girl category #hhhh. ugh. i was in public too much today and I'm gonna be in public too much tomorrow #so my brain is doing this to me tonight #delete later

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lockheed-martin-unofficial · 6 months ago

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After @randomationality mentioned Starscream getting thrown around often here, I remembered him being shiny for the first few episodes and decided to do some digging and figure out exactly when he lost the shine.

In Episode 1, while Megatron is still gone, Starscream’s chest has a very prominent shine.

Then again, Episode 2, Megatron returns and he is very shiny.

In Episode 3 he’s not as shiny as earlier (possibly due to the lighting, possibly due to offscreen Megatron) but we do see the glow of his weapon reflecting on his chest.

Same for Ep4, continuation of the Fowler scene. But at the end of Episode 4, Megatron beats Starscream on camera for the first time. And when you watch Episode 5,,,

You can clearly see he’s lost the shine. The same lighting is hitting both of them and while it reflects from Megatron, it doesn’t from Starscream.

Worth noting that Ep 6 does give him back a bit of shine, he never quite recovers to the same degree as the first few episodes. I stopped watching carefully after that point. Make of this what you will. The animators tweaking his design after the first few episodes, or an intentional change to show Megs’ abuse.

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jackass-jones · 1 year ago

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Akihiko becoming a cop is something that simply doesn’t happen in the coma route cuz Shinji would see that shit and be like Aki what the actual hell is wrong with you

#persona #persona 3 #akihiko sanada #shinjiro aragaki #akishinji #i guess #im making it that way lol #see if you know me you know i actively avoid p4 arena like the plague both cuz i hate p4 and cuz #i simply have no interest in how the p3 characters turn out if this is whats being done to them #i seen how akihiko and mitsuru look I HATE IT I HATE IT SO MUCH I WANNA EAT GRAVEL #the only character i care about is ken really i approve of him getting to be a funny teenager i love my baby boy so much #but i watched the akihiko social episodes for reload and he talks about becoming a cop and i was just like. of fucking course 😞#we just cant escape this shit huh theres always gotta be a cop character for some reason #i consider this a bad ending for him cuz even though atlus and their copaganda loving asses would probably looove to tell me otherwise #theres literally no way shinji would stand for that shit like my guy has beef with the kirijos and was a homeless addict #so you know cops wouldnt like him and hes seen some shit #they had to kill him cuz hed tell the truth sldjks #i definitely am gonna explore this dynamic in my fic but you know. no way in hell is aki gonna be a cop on my watch lol #maybe he can be like. a PE teacher or some shit akskkls

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xxplastic-cubexx · 2 months ago

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why is rivals Erik caked up

Whoever modeled rivals magneto has better self control than me i couldnt be trusted with modeling his proportions

#snap chats #looking at his model on the big screen again im gonna be sick #i woulda given him a bulge. sorry.#tuck king like ok …. thank you …. i wouldve been distracted the whole game otherwise #i fear having a huge dick and perfect ass wouldve been game breaking so fair move #his ass aint even that big its just Well Sculpted. sorry.#double sorry to my brother cause i keep Not Subtly looking at magnetos ass and verifying my statement #just one squeeze mr lehnsherr you may then kill me after the fact

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anakinstwinklebunny · 2 months ago

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I remember watching rots for the first time as a maybe 7-10 year old kid and being completely mad at Obi-Wan for chopping Anakin's limbs and letting him fry alive..I SWEAR I HATED HIM SO MUCH I CRIED BECAUSE IT WAS MY PRECIOUS ANI :(( i believed that he didn't deserve that.

#bunny's talking #period.#none gonna tell me otherwise #i dont care he killed kids and betrayed everone #HE WAS MANIPULATED FROM THE DAMN BEGINNING AND IF YOU DONT UNDERSTAND IT THEN LEAVE #anakin skywalker #hayden christensen #i love my ani so much you dont understand #but baby aga was so mad #so much hatred for this beared man in this precious heart

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rustedleopard · 28 days ago

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If you have Clover living with their monster friends, you gotta play up the differences between their biologies and make Clover look like a genuine freak in their eyes. You just gotta.

Starlo thinks he knows humans soooooooo well because he's watched human movies, yet the split second he sees their nose bleeding from the dry air, he's like "Ah shit. Any sort of bleeding is bad. Is this a fatal amount of blood loss? What do I do??? It just keeps coming out!" Ceroba is like "There can't be that many differences between a monster kid and a human kid. I've already raised one, how hard can another one be?" And then they get the flu, and since disease isn't really a thing with monsters, she's concerned that they're starting to Fall Down (<- okay, this one isn't funny). Martlet finds out that humans need to supplement their diet with things like fiber and iron, but apparently you can't just feed them cut up pieces of cloth and iron filings, that'll kill them. They find out that humans have internal organs and are made of cells and they're be simultaneously disgusted and intrigued. Like, you're made of a bunch of little parts? And those parts make up flesh tubes in your body and stuff? And they're doing their own thing all the time?? Without your awareness??? Does it feel weird????

"Oh, Clover has a 105°F fever but that's only a few degrees higher than how warm they usually are, I'm sure they're fine." <- Deranged statement uttered by one of them at some point.

#i don't think that monsters get diseases/have biology like humans do so all of this stuff is completely foreign to them #for them it's all tied to stuff like mood and the health of their SOUL. a good meal + some love + healing magic will fix most ailments #gonna get super hc heavy here so bear with me.#i hc that monster magic can't fix diseases. only injuries.#also human medicine is toxic to monsters. partially bc they have less mass than a human their size but also bc their bodies #aren't made to process them. a dose of aspirin would make a monster very sick/kill them depending on their size and such.#also human food and monster food are very different. humans who eat monster food will never be sated. they won't feel hunger #pangs but they won't be full either. also it's good for healing injuries but it doesn't have the necessary calories/nutrients to #be sustainable. (i ignore this in instances where Clover stays Underground bc the story of Clover dying via wasting away/vitamin #deficiency is not something i wanna explore myself). meanwhile when monsters eat human food they find it very dense #it's packed with flavor. it doesn't have any magic in it so they can't live off it but they can learn how to eat it with enough time #though their portions are always gonna be a bit small.#it's all a bit dry but i find this stuff interesting.#their friends are so lucky that clover is so damn self-sufficient because oh my god it'd be a disaster otherwise #char: clover

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vikvampir3 · 5 months ago

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Tfw when I realize I’ve known this whole time my dazai and general bsd hyperfixation was self destructive and I kinda don’t care

#I saw dazai and went oh shit we are quite literally the same person #He’s just killed more people #But otherwise we’re the same #In the sense of like almost everything else #And yeah I’ll read angst fanfics because every little fucked up tell dazai has in those I have #And it’s like a little fucked up bouncing off of each other because I’m just like him and my headcanons of him reflect me #And I know it’s self destructive #I know I was doing better and now i can barely avoid the itch #But it’s fucking addictive #Just gonna drown myself in our matching sorrows #lol #bsd #bungo stray dogs #dazai kinnie #dazai osamu #osamu dazai #dazai bsd #bsd dazai #bungou stray dogs #bungou gay dogs #bungou sd #actually mentally ill #When I read no longer human I had to take a moment to process that other people feel that alienation he describes #Like I didn’t know how to explain that I don’t feel fucking human but irl dazai somehow managed to #And yeah he’s a horrible person and I’m no where near that horrible but it wouldn’t startle me to discover I have the potential to be

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drowningparty · 9 months ago

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I will stop creating elaborate aus when I'm dead

#arkayne #kayne #arthur lester #this one came to me in a dream #tldr azathoth happened #they're trying to stop him #somehow the most wholesome au has the highest body count #and it is. weirdly wholesome. I mean they kill some cultists #for enrichment but you have to give them that they would be so unhappy otherwise like a snow leopard w/o pine trees #malevolent #(sort of)#art #mine #life is short I am gonna keep making art nobody cares about sorry

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thearcadeattendant · 6 months ago

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Henry Emily time because hot damn the FNAF mood is strong.

#five nights at freddy's #fnaf fanart #henry emily #digital art #my art #for wiliam and michael i just went for genericly my type while henry emily is a callout on my boyfriend and his taste in men #he doesnt even go here but would 100% date henry emily #also had to rush this one because work week is gonna be hell and im gonna have zero free time this weekend due to renfaire #this is like the most I've rapid posted on this blog since I made it #i swear im going to do things with it eventually but like whenever i plan to work kills me #also henry emily would totally nerdily wear merch pins from freddys and no one can convince me otherwise #feel like hed also get a kick out of off brand merch and wear them around to bother william who absolutely hates them

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corpocyborg · 3 months ago

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(so... uh... how far into dai do you have to get before it starts being good?)

#i thought da2 was worse than dao in almost every way #repetitive undetailed environments boring combat less player influence over the story less customization of the player character etc.#but it had one shining redeeming quality #and that was the characters #who i actually cared about more than the characters in dao #and lucky for da2 characters are the most important aspect of a game (for me at least)#and good characters can carry an otherwise mediocre game pretty damn far #but i have yet to find the redeeming quality of dai #i mean... it's pretty i guess? though i still needed mods to make a character that looks decent bc the character creator was lacking #but the environment is pretty and detailed i will give it that #but i've been at this eight hours and almost every quest is just go get an item and then go bring it to someone?#there's really minimal story to these quests #and the characters seem interesting but i've barely had opportunities to talk to them #even the ambient party dialogue seems significantly rarer than it was in either dao or da2 #why should i care about people i'm not getting to know?#also do they really just go with 'templars and mages are both equally evil & crazy and we're gonna need to just kill all of them you see'#surely that can't be the whole conclusion to the templar-mage war?? there has to be more right??#i'll keep playing bc hopefully it gets better #to be fair i didn't actually like da2 until act 2 #i liked dao right away but it still took a bit to get really good #so i think there's still potential here #we will see i suppose #dragon age #dai #dragon age critical

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blackjackkent · 6 months ago

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Fresh Meat

Pairing: Karlach/Tav (at end of fic) Characters: Karlach, Florenta the Garroter, Custom Male Tav (Hector Carlisle) Rating: G Warnings: Dark Themes Descriptors: Flashback, Military Backstory, Dark, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Happy/Bittersweet Ending Chapter Word Count: 2.2k Chapter Setting: Ten years pre-game, then early Act 3

Summary:

Memories of a young Karlach's first days in Zariel's army.

This fic is a character study investigation of some of Karlach's experiences in Avernus, inspired by this gorgeous and devastating piece of art by @featherwurm. Please go check them out; their Karlach-related art is some of my favorite in the fandom. <3

The ending of the fic is also a response to a prompt from @astreamofstars from this ask meme.

read on ao3 | send me fic requests!

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Sweat trickles down her spine, pools at the base of her neck. It's so fucking hot in Avernus, like being buried in the depths of a coal fire. It matches the burning in her chest, the boiling in her guts. She fidgets her weight from one leg to the other, back and forth, as if that’d somehow ease the volcanic pressure behind each pneumatic pulse of molten blood in her veins.

“I said ATTENTION!” Legate Jastor pauses in his inspection of his troops and halts in front of her, bellowing in her face. The pit fiend’s pale red eyes are filled with disdainful loathing. “I don't care if you’re Zariel's new pet, Cliffgate; you'll hold still when you're told!” He lifts a hand and cuffs her in a vicious backhand slap across the face.

She squeezes her eyes shut, forcing herself not to react to the pain. Easier than it should be, really, because everything else hurts too. Her chest hurts and her head hurts. The exhaust vents along her shoulders burn with searing chemical heat. The bruising sting of the slap disappears, swallowed up by the inferno.

“Yes, sir,” she grinds out.

This isn't real, some part of her brain still stubbornly insists. No fucking way this is real. I'm dreaming. Gonna wake up any second and go see Gortash and laugh - hey, boss, you'll never guess the shit I dreamed you did to me!

It can't be real, that he betrayed her, after everything they've been through together. It can't be real that she’s on another plane in the fires of the Hells themselves. It can't be real that she met the Archdevil of Avernus, and the bitch cut out her heart.

It can't be real. It can't be real. It can't be real. It's not real.

She opens her eyes again and stares into Jastor's smirking, grotesque face. His breath stinks of brimstone as he laughs. “Fidgety little fuck, aren't you, Dart? We'll fix that soon enough.”

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