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hollybell51 · 2 years ago

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Last night on Earth

^don't mind me going absolutely feral over this gif

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Cas x AFAB!fem!Reader

Supernatural (2005), s05e03 "free to be you and me"

Word count: 6.4K

Summary: following the hooker failure, you feel that sitting alone in a shitty abandoned house is not the best way to spend one's last night on Earth. Cas seems to agree with you.

Content: smut! Yay! First kisses, first time, making out, handjobs, hickeys, penetrative sex, safe sex (yay!), cowgirl, mutual masturbation, fingering, gags? if you squint? maybe? like a hand over the mouth. Discussions of sex work and sex workers (I'm not commenting on anything, it's just there as dialogue due to the nature of the episode, and all dialogue/internal monologue regarding the topic is purely for the furtherment of the plot). Talking during sex, Cas is loud. Sex on a couch, spooning, almost-love-confessions ("like-confessions"). Very light comment on body image, some very vague descriptions of scars (reader is a hunter). Cas is just Cas and I love him for it. He's also a virgin. Dean's probably a warning but I adore him.

Notes: Heyyyy how's it going? One day into my holidays and I churn out this bad boy. Couldn't get the idea out of my head, and hey, I'm a sucker for virgin angels. This show is rapidly taking over my whole life lmao.

It's also been a while so I just thought I'd remind people of the taglist form, and the existence of my AO3 (if you wanna read my stuff there for whatever reason). Anyways enjoy, stay safe out there xx

“That was quick,” you called as the door creaked open, Dean’s low chuckle echoing through the hallway. You closed the book you’d been reading – a shitty paperback you’d picked out of a bargain bin – and watched as the other hunter dropped his jacket onto a rusted dining chair. You’d expected them to be gone for a few hours, hence your foray into the realms of “downtime”, but it had barely been one since they’d left, Dean throwing an obscenely enthusiastic wink your way as he shoved an apprehensive looking Cas out to enjoy his last night on Earth.

“We had to wrap it up pretty fast.” Dean glanced over his shoulder at Cas, laughter still clinging to his face. You hadn’t seen him look that happy in ages, not for this long. Well, that was something at least.

You’d had your doubts about the whole idea from the moment Dean had mentioned it. Sure, sex was sex. It was something that could be pretty darn nice and that you were glad for in your life, but you weren’t sure if Dean fully grasped that it was never the same with a hooker. It would never feel as good, it would never be meaningful, it would be a service purchased from a provider. A business transaction. That wasn’t any way to experience it for the first time, in your opinion.

“Good time not a long time, then?” you asked mildly.

“Would you say that, Cas?”

The angel stiffened, hands shoved into the pockets of his trench coat.

You wrinkled your nose, suddenly wondering if you should feel bad. “Bad time?”

Dean snorted. “I’m turning in. You tell (Y/N) about it, she’ll give you a pat on the back and tell you it’s alright. And don’t look so… grief stricken.”

“G’night,” you waved to his retreating back, then turned back to Cas. “Really bad time?”

He really did look grief stricken, standing stock still in the dimness. Even his hair looked droopier than usual, and you almost got out of your seat just to push it off his face. You settled for putting your book down and leaning forward.

“She ran away,” he said after a moment. “I think I scared her.”

“Geez,” you frowned. “How’d you scare a hooker?”

He shrugged. “I told her it wasn’t her fault that her father Gene ran off.” Then, as if it explained everything; “He hated his job at the post office.”

You laughed, but stopped quickly. “Oh, Cas. You know the whole–”

“The whole industry is run on absent fathers, I know.” He sighed. “Dean found it hilarious.”

This time, you did get up, crossing the room to pat his shoulder. You knew Dean wouldn’t have meant anything by it, wouldn’t have been laughing at Cas. Still, a pang of what was almost pity shot through you. It wasn’t about the sex, not really, as much as Dean played that aspect up. It was more all the coulds that never would. Cas wasn’t human, as much as he could pass it off (mostly), but there were so many things that he wasn’t going to get to try now. You just didn’t understand how he could so casually volunteer to die at the drop of a hat. It was either incredibly selfless, or incredibly selfish. Or maybe just stupid.

But no, Cas wasn’t stupid. He was razor sharp, a soldier of God, even if you poked fun at him when he didn’t understand your and Dean’s pop-culture reference infused slang. It had only been the last time you’d seen him that you’d vowed to make him sit through all the Star Wars movies, something you hadn’t realised until afterwards had sounded a lot like a “movie and chill” proposal. Luckily, he wouldn’t have picked up on that. Just like he wouldn’t have picked up – like Dean had – the moments where you caught yourself watching him, or the smiles that were just too damned determined to break out on your face when he showed up – either in the real world or in your mind. And thank the heavens nobody but you noticed the tiny flurries of butterflies in your stomach you’d noticed increasingly often when he was around, the surges of warmth that would sneak up and rush over you unexpectedly when you thought of him, the tingles that flooded your skin when he stood that little bit too close to you.

Which, when you thought about it, was maybe contributing to the ounce of vindication you were feeling regarding the hooker failure. It wasn’t all the “I told you so” type of satisfaction, anyway, and you weren’t too proud to admit when you liked someone.

“Don’t worry about it,” you assured him now, giving his shoulder a gentle squeeze.

“You’re giving me a pat on the back and telling me it’s alright,” he sighed, almost mournfully. “Dean said–”

You reached up, pressing a finger to his lips and shaking your head. “You wanna know something?”

He nodded, brows furrowed. He hadn’t drawn back, you noticed.

“It doesn’t matter how much sex Dean has,” you whispered, hand still floating close by his face. “I wouldn’t take a damn letter of his advice in that department.”

“Why not?” His breath tickled your skin, and suddenly you realised just how close you were standing.

You shrugged, dispelling the shiver that had run up your spine. “I just know if a dude came onto me how he comes onto chicks, I’d kick him in the balls.”

“I’ll make a point to not come onto you like he does, in that case.”

It took a moment – past the words “like he does”, not that he wouldn’t come onto you full stop, but like Dean does – for the fact that it was a joke to sink in, then you smiled. Maybe there was, or had been, hope for him yet. You took a breath, turning the words over in your mind. It was now or never, you supposed.

“I want you to know,” you said carefully, “if you die–”

“When. Tomorrow, when I die.”

“Uh, yeah.” You swallowed. How could he be so matter of fact about it? How could he just say it like that? It didn’t matter, you supposed. Whether he said it or didn’t, it wasn’t going to change the fact that it was happening.

“When I die…” he prompted when you were silent.

“I want you to know that I liked you,” you said simply, then shrugged. “I think I was on the way to really liking you.”

He frowned, and for a moment you thought you’d made a massive mistake. “You don’t have to do that,” he said. “I don’t mind. I know I’m… a dick.”

“Jesus, Cas,” you snorted. “Guess we say that a bit too much, don’t we?”

“Maybe.”

“And we don’t say ‘thank you’ enough.”

He shook his head, still holding your hand. “You don’t have to do this,” he repeated.

“It’s not about that. Not all of it, anyway.” You smiled, glancing at your hand where it met his. It looked big, wrapped around your fingers, and it fitted painfully well. “But, you know, if it’s your last night on Earth…” You looked up, wiggling your eyebrows. You could play it off as a joke if you needed to, you weren’t too far in yet.

That familiar almost-smile you’d come to look for danced over his lips. “You pity me, dying a virgin? Dying,” he added. “A virgin.”

You laughed. “I don’t… pity you. Not exactly. Not because you’re gonna die a virgin, and definitely not because you’re a virgin.”

“Because I scared away a prostitute?”

“Her loss,” you laughed. “And anyway, if it’s your first and last time, it’d be nice to… y’know… feel good.”

He frowned. “Surely a prostitute would know how to do that?”

“Maybe the technicalities,” you shrugged, “but there’s more to it than that. There’s feelings, y’know?”

“Feelings?”

Again, you shrugged, suddenly self conscious. What were you doing? “Two way street kind of thing,” you explained lamely. “Not just someone you want, but someone who wants you. Not just your money.” You were acutely aware of the unspoken words floating beneath the casual sentence. I want you. It could be me.

A pause, where his eyes seemed to bore into your soul. He had a knack for that, you’d noticed. Sometimes you felt like he could see right to the very core of your being. In the dimness, they looked even more startlingly blue than usual. He was so close, you could almost count his eyelashes, almost feel the rise and fall of his chest beneath the coat, jacket, shirt, tie…

“When it’s…” He paused, his tongue darting over his lips. God, his lips. “Someone you want.”

“Mhm.”

“Someone who wants you.”

“Mhm.”

“Not just your money.”

You hadn’t taken your eyes off his mouth through the whole exchange, and your voice, when you asked, sounded softer than you’d meant it to, breathy and faint to your own ears. “Do you want me, Cas? Last night on Earth, and all.”

The corner of his mouth curled up, brows twitching into a thoughtful frown. No, you thought, not quite a frown. Something else, more curious than confused. Almost quizzical. “I think…” He paused, drawing breath. “I think I do.”

“Ok,” you smiled, ignoring the butterfly rampage taking place in your stomach. This kind of thing wasn’t supposed to happen in real life. Not your life, anyway, even if it was Cas’s last night on Earth. It didn’t exist outside the pages of those shitty paperbacks.

“Do you want me?” Cas asked.

“Mhm.” It was all you could manage, really. Then you were stretching up the last few inches between your face and his, pressing your lips gently against his own.

He was perfectly still for a heartbeat, two heartbeats, almost three. Then his hand tightened around yours and he pulled you closer, trench coat rustling where your chest met it. He kissed you the way you remembered the first boy who’d ever kissed you – a boy in your year level at school, at a party, playing spin the bottle no less – had kissed you. The want was all there, the enthusiasm and anticipation and the only half-conscious desire for more. His lips remained shut, but you could feel in it that he knew it wasn’t quite right.

You pulled away briefly, just enough to raise a hand to his mouth and run your thumb over his bottom lip. “Like this,” you murmured, pushing just enough to part his lips. Then your hands were in his hair and you were pulling him down to you, and this time it was perfect.

He made a little sound of pleasure as your tongue slipped beside his, stroking, caressing, gently as you could. Without any guidance, his hand had found the cloth-shielded contours of your breast, tracing the outline with a sort of awe. His fingers ran along the neckline of your top, dipping under the material, curving around your bare shoulder, exploratory and cautious.

You let him explore you, his hands mapping out every curve he could touch, tongue darting into every uncharted depth he could find, tasting and learning and discovering parts of you you hadn’t guessed could be felt like this through just a kiss. Your mind spiralled as his hand eased under your shirt, cool fingers tickling the skin of your hip. He squeezed gently, pulling you against him harder, and you gave in completely. You weren’t sure if it was what he had been going for, but when you pushed your pelvis against his he gasped; a quiet, shuddering little sound that went straight to your panties.

“Ok?” you breathed between kisses, then, at his nod, you did it again.

His voice was strangled when he said your name, the pads of his fingers digging into the soft flesh of your waist. Oh Cas, you thought. A rush of affection washed over you at how eager he was, where just an hour before he’d been being literally pushed out the door by Dean, looking as terrified as you’d ever seen him at the prospect of sex. Now he was kissing you hungrily, kneading at your skin, inching your shirt up off your torso, his feet at risk of tangling with yours as he walked you backwards. Not to mention the increasingly noticeable bulge pressed against you.

“Clothes off,” you breathed, already undoing his tie. “On the couch.”

He paused, then he was shrugging off the trench coat, the blazer following suit – no pun intended – and landing with a soft rustling thump on the floor. You stepped back, just a little, as he deftly unfastened the buttons of his shirt, drinking in every inch of skin like a kid in a lolly shop. Fuck, maybe you had the hots for him even worse than you’d thought.

“Are you going to undress too?” The question was mild, matter of fact, but something in the way Cas had paused midway through relieving himself of his pants and was watching you, hands still on the belt buckle, made you stomach flip.

You cleared your throat, but your voice still came out too low, too husky. “Sure.”

His gaze didn’t leave you for an instant – apart from when he kicked his discarded trousers aside – as you pulled your shirt the rest of the way over your head, slid your jeans as gracefully as you could down your legs. You shivered slightly in the cool night air, acutely aware of your hunter’s body.

Cas’s eyes widened, scanning over you and taking in every inch of your skin. It wasn’t perfect, you were aware of that. It wasn’t like a hooker’s body, it carried you around as you fought monsters, and was littered with the proof of said monster fights. You wondered if Cas had seen other – normal – human bodies like this, if he’d find the painfully obvious reminders of your mortality somehow repellent. You suddenly felt very, very small and very, very human.

“Sorry about… y’know…” You shrugged, patting your thigh awkwardly. “The meatsack’s a little dinged up. Most people don’t look like this.”

“Don’t look like what?” he frowned, finally looking back at your face.

You shrugged again, poking a long white scar over your side. The first werewolf you’d ever come face to face with, and nearly the last. “Scarred. At least not as much as I am,” you added.

A shiver shot up your spine as Cas settled his hands on your bare waist, fingers running over the most noticeable marks. “Don’t apologise,” he said softly. “You’re human, and you spend your days killing monsters. It would be more disturbing if you were unblemished.”

You laughed at that, a small breathy sound. “You think I’m disturbing?”

He smiled faintly. “You’re not so bad.”

You felt your own mouth curve, matching his. “Neither are you.”

He leaned down, his lips meeting yours once more. This kiss was softer, more intimate, maybe a little too intimate. You were vaguely aware of the couch behind you. Before your knees knocked against its side, you broke away – a difficult task, given that Cas chased your lips like a lab rat after cheese – and spun, laying your hands firmly on his chest.

“Couch,” you muttered, giving a gentle push.

He pulled you with him as he sat down, his hands running down over your hips, your thighs, back up again to your waist. He watched you carefully as his touch slid up the centre of your torso, over your bra, lingering momentarily on the anti-possession sigil tattooed over your heart before he moved on, across the line of your ribs. Unbidden, the memory of the last time he’d touched you there sprang to mind; the sharp, burning pain and throbbing after-ache of the Enochian sigils being literally carved into your bones.

“I can see them,” he whispered, as if he’d read your mind. “The sigils.”

You raised an eyebrow. “How do they look?”

“Foreign,” he said after a moment. “They don’t belong.”

You shrugged, unsure how to respond to that. Sure, the sigils weren’t part of you, and you didn’t exactly know how you felt about angel writing being carved into your ribcage, but there was also something reassuring about knowing it was there, knowing you carried that kind of magic with you. In you.

Cas’s eyes lifted from your body, fixing on your own. “Can you feel them?” he inquired.

You shook your head. “Not really. Not physically. But I know they’re there.”

“Perhaps I should have asked,” he muttered, almost to himself. “It’s your body, after all.”

“No,” you smiled. “Don’t worry about it. I kinda like the idea of you scribbling on me. Bone graffiti.”

“Bone graffiti?”

You felt the smile grow, nodding. “Besides,” you added, “I’ll always have a little bit of you, even after you're gone. Like a… souvenir.”

“Oh,” was all he said. You supposed people were right about impending death making people sappier. But still, what you said was true. Your own ribs had become a kind of lucky charm, a talisman, a locket of sorts.

You dragged yourself out of that line of thinking before you went any further, turning your attention back to the angel currently underneath you on the couch. Underneath you and very shirtless. You’d placed your own hands on his chest in an attempt to not fall over on top of him, and now you let yourself touch him – really touch him. His chest heaved under your fingers as you swept over him, a tiny, strangled noise falling from his lips.

“Alright?” you asked, pausing for a moment.

He nodded, shifting slightly under you. “It’s good,” he said softly.

“Keep going?”

Again, a nod. Cautiously, gently, you spread your fingers over his chest. His heart beat fast, thudding frantically as you moved your other hand lower, down the centre of his torso, following the contours of his lithe muscles. You reached the waistband of his underpants, pausing.

“Can I?” you asked, your hand hovering over his barely concealed erection.

“Yes,” he whispered, tongue darting over his lips. His eyes flicked from your face to your hand, back to your face again.

You smiled as you slipped your fingers under the waistband of his underwear. His dick was hot to the touch, hard and already damp at the tip. “You ever touched yourself?” you asked as you withdrew your hand, spitting into your palm.

Cas’s breath hitched. “Once.”

“Yeah?”

He nodded, licking his lips again. “Dean said I wasn’t supposed to talk about it.”

“Yeah, well…” You smiled again, wrapping your fingers around his cock and stroking languidly. “You can tell me.”

He gave a sort of half gasp, half moan, his grip tightening on your thigh. “I found Dean’s magazine,” he confessed. “The one with the women, not the cars.”

“Mhm?” You kept your voice mild, focussing on the steady motion of your arm and wrist, your fingers sliding effortlessly over him. You could almost see Cas flipping through the pages of one of those god-awful porn mags Dean insisted on carting around, picture his confused little head-tilt and his frown as he looked through the pictures, his hand creeping to where yours was now, his much larger fingers circling–

“It was uncomfortable,” he continued, jerking you back to the present. “Too hot. I really just wanted it to go away.”

“And did it?”

“Not until I– oh!” He broke off as your thumb slid over the leaking head of his cock, fingers digging into your thigh.

You fought off the surge of heat the sound sent shooting through you, watching his slightly parted lips, his wide eyes. “Did you cum?” you asked evenly.

“Yes,” he panted, hips twitching up slightly. “Oh, (Y/N), yes–”

“Yes, you did cum?”

“Yes, yes I did.”

“Was it good?”

Another soft moan, then he smiled. “Not as good as this.”

Maybe it was the praise, maybe the moan, maybe the smile. Either way, the words went straight to your panties. You ignored it, stopping yourself from grinding against him with willpower that would have impressed Jesus. Although, you weren’t sure how he would have felt about you fucking a literal angel.

You leant forward, kissing his lips gently, then his jaw, then his neck, then his chest. You kept going, tracing a path inexorably downwards, shuffling backwards to straddle his thigh as he shifted with you, now splayed along the couch lengthways.

“Help me out,” you muttered, your hand moving beside your face as you attempted to pull his underwear off. Obediently, he lifted his hips and kicked them aside, the muscles of his stomach twitching as you placed a kiss on the junction of his hip. And holy shit, you could have just watched his torso moving like that forever. You kissed his hip again, sucking gently at the spot, licking over the mark you conjured. Then you added another beside it, and another, and another. A little belt of hickeys across his pelvis.

“Do you, hm, touch yourself too?” he asked, breathless and raw.

“Fuck, Cas.” You paused where you’d been about to kiss the base of his cock, raising your eyes to his. His chest rose and fell, rose and fell again, the skin almost glowing in the dim light.

He frowned. “Am I not supposed to ask that?”

“You can ask me anything you want,” you assured him, kissing the little trail of hair below his belly button. “And yeah, I do.”

“Does it feel good?”

You smiled. “Yeah.”

“Do you…” He paused, searching for the words. “Do you want to do it now?”

“This is about you,” you said softly, giving his cock a gentle squeeze. “Don’t worry about me.”

“I want you to feel good too.”

You sat up, studying him. There was nothing by sincerity in his eyes, the genuine desire – and desire there was – for you to enjoy yourself. And why shouldn’t you indulge that? You were having a great time as it was, and there was no denying the throbbing ache that had grown exponentially between your legs.

“You want me to touch myself?” you asked, double checking.

He nodded. “Yes, please.”

“Ok.” You shed your own underpants, shivering as the cool air came in contact with your wetness. Slowly, you reached down and ran your finger over your clit, your breath hitching in your chest. You repeated the action, your hand moving further down to circle your entrance, slick gathering on your fingers. You’d done this countless times before, and you weren’t ashamed of it. Masturbation was natural, it was a perfectly normal perfectly human thing to do. This, however was different. You’d never had an audience before, never had anyone watch you with such rapt wonder and awe.

Cas’s eyes flicked down to your bra, then back to your face. A question, almost a request.

“Off?” you asked, already reaching behind your back. He nodded, watching carefully as you shed the garment and cast it aside to join the pile of clothes on the floor. Slowly, reverently, he stretched up and kissed your breast, his hand leaving its place on your hip to trace over the other one.

A shiver ran down your spine and you bit down on your lip, attempting futilely to stifle your moan. Absently, your hand resumed its place between your thighs as Cas’s hand left your chest and found its way to his cock. You’d never in a million years have thought you’d be where you were now; touching yourself on top of an angel touching himself while he did his best to turn your chest into one giant hickey. You were hardly complaining.

Something rustled in the next room over, and you both froze. Fuck, you thought. Dean was still (hopefully) asleep, only the wall and the hastily closed door to that room barring him from hearing you. Cas seemed to have had exactly the same thought, his head tilted slightly as he listened, his breath raising goosebumps on the spit-damp skin of your chest. There was another rustle, then a quiet snort, then nothing. He hadn’t woken, then.

“We gotta be quiet,” you whispered. You shifted, biting back another moan. “Ok?”

“Ok,” Cas nodded. He pressed his lips firmly together, eyes flicking down to where your hand disappeared between your legs. You hissed as you resumed your movement, acutely aware of every possible sound you or Cas made, ears pricked for any other disturbance from nextdoor.

Cas’s free hand was still resting on your thigh, firmly holding you in place on top of himself. His wrist brushed your own with every stroke of his cock, the skin over his stomach and chest twitching ever so slightly. His own thigh tensed as he thrust into his hand, something that you could only describe as a whimper falling from his lips. Heat surged over you, your mind awash with desire. If only that hooker knew what she was missing.

“Sorry,” he muttered almost immediately, eyes darting towards the door.

“‘Salright,” you replied, swallowing hard. Being quiet was a much more difficult task than you’d anticipated, but you’d be lying if you said you didn’t enjoy the possibility of being caught just a little bit. You grunted softly as your finger brushed over a particularly sensitive spot, the familiar rhythm and movements working just as well as ever, and even better when you had Cas to look at. Not to mention the warmth of his mouth where it occasionally found your breasts again.

But you wanted more, you needed more. The same part of you that was electrified by your own touch craved his, especially when his beautiful hands were right there and his eyes were still fixed on you like you were the centre of the universe, his own movements becoming faster and more frantic, chest heaving.

You paused, much as it pained you. “Do you wanna go further?”

He frowned. “What do you mean?”

Gently, you laid your hand over his and peeled it away from his cock. Wriggling forwards a little, you finally – finally – rocked your hips over his, revelling in the hot hardness of him against your slick. His mouth fell open, fingers tightening on your own.

“Here, Cas. I want you inside me, wanna fuck you properly.”

“Oh, (Y/N),” he sighed, his own hips matching your movement.

“Will you let me? Let me fuck you?”

“Yes,” he nodded. “Yes, of course.”

You smiled. “Ok, one second.” You reached over the side of the couch, digging through the pockets of your jeans until you found your wallet – and the little foil package inside it.

“What are you doing?” Cas asked as you tore it open and set the latex atop his dick.

“It’s a condom,” you explained. “So I don’t get pregnant. No offence,” you grinned, “but I don’t really wanna have your babies any time soon.”

“Oh.” He swallowed, processing. “That’s… understandable.”

“All good?” At his nod, you slid the condom the rest of the way down, spitting into your hand once more and resuming your earlier ministrations. “It feels a little different, I know,” you whispered as you moved to grind against him once more.

“It’s still good,” he assured you, placing his hands gently on your hips.

You smiled. “Ready?”

“Yes.” The word was a breath, nothing more, but it was all you needed. Carefully, you lined him up and sank down, watching his face carefully. His eyes widened, his fingers digging into your flesh slightly as a deep groan reverberated through the space between you.

“Gotta be quiet,” you reminded him, your voice not half as steady as you’d have liked. “Don’t wanna wake Dean up, yeah?”

“Yeah,” he echoed, “quiet.”

You leaned forwards and placed a soft kiss on his lips, rocking your hips over his. He was everything you’d imagined and so much more. It was like he’d been made for you, the way his cock stroked every inch of your insides, sliding smoothly with how wet you were. You wanted to go back in time and kick your past self for having waited this long.

“God, Cas,” you sighed. “Oh God.”

His brows pinched together slightly, but he didn’t say anything. Instead, he stretched up and captured your lips with his, moving down over your jaw to your neck, sucking gently just as you’d done to the skin of his hip. Your fingers tangled in his hair, holding him close against you as you lifted and lowered your hips, a faint whine somehow slipping from your lips despite your best efforts.

“Is this, hm, ok?” he asked, his usually gravelly voice made even more so.

“Fuck,” you gasped as his hand came to rest on your ass, kneading at the soft flesh, moving up over the front of your hips where your leg met the rest of your body. “So good, Cas.”

“You’re so good,” he murmured, guiding your movements gently. He thrust into you, his hips meeting yours halfway, stomach muscles flexing.

“Let me,” you said, pushing him backwards into the couch cushions. “You relax, yeah? I’ve got it. I’ve got you.”

He nodded, head tipping back as you bounced on his dick, the rough fabric of the cushion beneath you scratching at your knees. Fumbling slightly, your hands found purchase on his chest and you locked your elbows in an odd sort of imitation of CPR. If CPR was done from the front rather than the side, you supposed, but you weren’t exactly doing any resuscitation.

His chest heaved under your touch, another low groan seeming to echo in the otherwise stillness of the night. The tiny part of your brain that wasn’t totally consumed with the wonderful pleasure-ache of his cock hitting deep inside you and the burn of your thighs was torn between telling him to be quiet and just listening to him, but then he was licking his lips again and his mouth was falling open and you were lost.

“(Y/N),” he panted, his eyes fixed on your face. “Oh, (Y/N), oh my–”

“Alright?” you asked, biting back a moan as you found a particularly good angle.

“Yes, yes, of course. It’s, hm, so good.” He glanced momentarily down at where your body met his, another groan rumbling in his chest.

“Sh–” you whispered, half tempted to press your hand over his mouth. Or maybe your own, given the struggle you were facing to remain quiet yourself.

“Sorry, sorry I–”

You cut him off quickly. “It’s alright Cas, you’re fine. Just, fuck–”

“(Y/N),” he panted, the muscles of his arms and stomach flexing as his fingers gripped the couch cushion, luminescent in the dimness. Again, his eyes flicked downwards, this time to the soft mound of flesh currently on display.

You smiled, reaching down to take his hand, drawing it up to rest over your pelvis. His skin was warmer than you’d ever felt it, faintly clammy and God his hand was big under your own. You couldn’t count the number of times you’d caught yourself picturing his hands in this kind of context, and you didn’t want to try. His fingers splayed over your skin, moving with you, covering the whole space below your naval.

“That’s where you are,” you panted. “That’s where I can feel you, Cas, right there.”

A small, strained noise you could only describe as a whine. “Is it, ah, good? Do you like it? Do you like feeling… me?”

“Fuck,” you sighed. “Yeah, sure do, Cas. Do you like feeling me?”

He smiled, biting down hard on his lower lip. “Of course. I like it immensely.”

You felt yourself clench at his words, and this time you were unable to restrain the downright pornographic moan that tore from your throat. Any other time, you might have been embarrassed, but Cas seemed to like it. Pressing your lips firmly together, you glanced hastily towards the other room, but as far as you could tell there was no disturbance.

“(Y/N), oh, (Y/N), I don’t think—” He swallowed hard, eyes wide and back on your face.

“Yeah? What’s wrong?”

“I can’t— I don’t think I can be quiet, (Y/N) I—”

Affection bloomed alongside the desire in your gut, and you had half a mind to tell him it was alright, he didn’t even have to worry about being quiet at all. It wasn’t like you didn’t love the noises he was making. But Dean was only one room over, and you didn’t want to wake him.

“You can, Cas,” you breathed, “you can. You’re doing so well already, we just gotta— fuck.”

He’d bucked his hips up into you, the movement jolting the steady knot of pleasure forming low in your stomach. He was close, you could see it as much as hear it, but the thought of the thin walls and your friend sleeping in the next room over had taken root more firmly in your mind now.

“It’s so much,” Cas gasped. “Oh, oh, (Y/N) it’s so much—”

You managed a smile, slowing down your movements a little. “I know,” you said softly. “You’re ok, yeah?”

He nodded frantically. “Hm, yes, yes. Please, don’t stop. Keep going, please—”

Another soft moan slipped from your mouth, Cas’s answering groan enough to make your legs shake. It was too loud, and any other time you’d have soaked up his praises and curses and everything, but not now. After a moment’s hesitation, you clamped your hand firmly over his mouth, sh-ing him gently. If possible, his eyes widened even further and he groaned against your skin.

“Alright?” you breathed.

Another frantic nod, an almost-whimper as your grip firmed up. Well I’ll be damned, you thought vaguely. Who’d have guessed he was into that?

You felt him shiver all over as you continued to rock your hips over his, his hand where it rested on your hip tightening. You wondered if you’d have finger-shaped bruises later. It didn’t matter, you told yourself as he moaned again, his stomach muscles tensing, something that could have been your name squashed under your hand.

“Sh, shh!” you gasped. Between holy shit I’m so close and holy shit he’s so close, the thought that Dean was right there and would hear you was still rooted in your mind. “Cas, sh, Dean’s right– ah, fuck, Dean’s–”

You broke off as Cas’s chest heaved, his hips bucking up into you once more. His mouth had fallen open under your hand and he was gasping something, angel curse-words, maybe? It didn’t matter, not when his eyes were screwed shut and his head was tipped back, your name sprinkled into the litany of foreign words like a prayer.

The sight was enough to make the bomb that had been building in your stomach explode, sparks of pleasure shooting through your aching legs right to your toes and back up again. You might have said Cas’s name, you weren’t sure, but the sentiment was there. You clamped a hand over your own mouth, nothing but the need to be quiet reverberating through your pleasure-blanked mind.

After what felt like an age, your brain managed to find its way back into your skull and the aftershocks of your orgasm faded from your body. Gently, you removed your hand from Cas’s mouth and looked down at him, smiling.

“Alright?” you asked.

His hair was a mess, his brow lightly beaded with sweat, cheeks flushed. There was even a slight red mark where your hand had been, which you stroked gently.

“I’m more than alright,” he smiled, turning to place a tiny kiss on your fingers. “Are you?”

“Good,” you nodded as you slid off him, mourning the sudden emptiness momentarily as you peeled off the condom, tying it in a neat knot to be disposed of later. Then he was lifting his arm, wriggling with you as if he could read your mind, and you were being cocooned against his body.

“I’m sorry,” he said after a moment, “if I was too loud.”

“You weren’t,” you assured him quickly. “Not at all. Sorry about… gagging you. I should’ve asked. That’s not what usually happens.”

He hesitated, turning to meet your eyes. “I… didn’t mind.”

“No?”

He shook his head, a small, nervous smile dancing across his lips. “No. In fact, I quite liked it.”

You felt your own smile widen as you placed a soft kiss on his cheek, taking his hand where it rested on his chest. “Good,” you said. “What about the rest? What do you think?”

He sighed, a beautifully satisfied noise that flooded you with warmth. “I think I should not have waited this long.”

You laughed, pressing closer. “Mhm?”

“Mhm. Thank you, (Y/N), truly.”

“Oh,” you said softly, turning away to hide the blood rushing to your face. “That’s ok, Cas. Thank you.”

He gave another little hum, shifting to drape his arm over your waist and pull you into him, fingers skimming your ribs. Getting spooned by a divine warrior of God, you thought with a thrill. Real life really was stranger than fiction.

“You’re tired,” he murmured, his voice seeming to rumble through you in the best way possible. “You should sleep.”

“Hold on,” you protested as you felt his arm withdrawing. You grabbed his hand, pulling it firmly back down to rest on your stomach, wiggling closer. “There was a blanket on the back, grab that. I’m staying here.”

You could almost feel him frowning when he replied. “You’d not rather a bed?”

You only hesitated a moment before bending to kiss his arm. “I’d rather you.”

He didn’t seem to know quite what to say to that, but after a beat something heavy and slightly scratchy was being draped over you, and Cas’s arm was tightening around your waist, and his lips were pressing against your shoulder.

“G’night,” you whispered.

“Good night, (Y/N).”

It was Dean who found his two friends curled together on the couch the next morning. He snorted, taking in the gentle rise and fall of your shoulders in tandem with Cas’s, his hand enveloping your smaller one where it rested just above the blanket, the assortment of what was very clearly Cas’s suit and your own clothes scattered over the floor. Well, he supposed, the night hadn’t been a complete failure. He had half a mind to throw something at you, the scene was so jarringly… sweet.

“Rise n’ shine lovebirds,” he called instead, “we’ve got shit to do.”

#supernatural #castiel #castiel x reader #castiel smut #castiel x you #supernatural fanfiction #shameless smut #supernatural smut #smut #fanfiction #fanfic #cas x reader #female reader #x reader #reader insert

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syscest · 3 months ago

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[not a confession] y'all mentioned sys4sys sex now i'm, curious about the intrasystem sex basics.... i don't even know where to begin looking for info on this, but i'd like to be more intimate with my headmates. can y'all talk a little bit more about that or share any tips. thanks a bunch (anyone can share tips btw)

hi ^^

so intrasystem sex ends up being a lot more complicated and individualized than intersystem stuff in our experience. a lot of it comes down to how your individual experience of systemhood works.

for folks with fully realised "headspaces" where it feels like headmates all hang out while not in front. headmates interacting with each other, or having fucked in headspace, is sometimes just like. a fact of life. or at least that's what I'm led to believe.

we personally don't have much of a headspace, and interactions seperate from the body tend to feel pretty floaty to us. it's good for flirting or bullying your headmates, but doesn't manage sex for us.

if you're capable of co-consciousness, or even just fairly rapid switches, we can definitely recommend masturbating together. mutual masturbation counts as sex for folks in different bodies, so why should the shared body experience be different.

getting off to smut that you can project a fantasy about you and your headmate onto and passing control of your body back and forth in the process, is probably our most common method here.

at the same time having a headmate instruct you how to get off, or order you to do particular things. is very hot. and once again a kind of kink/sex you can do with people in other bodies, that translates pretty easily to in-system sex if you're co-con.

if you have the ability to be co-con and also pass control of parts of the body back and forth, you can also sometimes get the sensation of another headmate touching you through the body (e.g. their use of a shared hand on your use of the shared face). or, if they can immobilise parts of your body for you, you can sometimes get a good approximation of what it might feel like having them pin those parts of you down.

even if you can't share bodily control, you can try things like having one headmate put the body in restraints (collar and a leash tied around a bedpost, cuffs around the ankles - normal kink precautions apply make sure it's something all ur headmates can undo in a pinch) and then switch out of front, leaving another headmate tied up in a compromising position. while it might not be a direct headmate on headmate interaction, you're still very much doing a kink scene with your headmate.

if you don't have the capacity to talk back and forth in your head or similar, things get a bit more difficult from here. sexting your headmates or leaving them slutty pics in a private chat for them to read later is always an option. as is just getting off thinking about them and seeing if they express opinions about that later.

our experience is a blend of a lot of the above, and we've found a solid horny rapport between headmates can be really positive. getting caught off guard by a headmate's horny thoughts and stumbling to catch your breath? having a headmate throw you onto your bed. grope you. tease you. push you around? getting collared and leashed to the bed and left to relax half naked and feeling very cute about it? finding porn that reminds you of another system member and masturbating furiously while you tell them what you'd do to them? being ordered to cum in a glass and then swallow your/your headmate's cum? well it all ends up a nice pleasant blur of experiences, at least for our own median-ish system.

if anyone else has tips or experiences feel free to chime in. again what works best for you will likely be very individual and require some trial and error to figure out ^^

#meta #mod ???#mod 🔮#intrasys #plural nsft #asks

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jealousmartini · 5 months ago

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hi! i saw ur post where u mention age change with loa and could u talk more about that? cause i just turned 20, but i wanna be 17 again just so i can experience teenage things (i had depression and extreme social anxiety my whole teenagehood). i wanna feel young and do things right, apply everything i know now to this time in my life cause i can't help but feeling so old speacially since i have zero "firsts", like i'm 20 and no first crush or first kiss (ik it's not the end of the world, but i want back the expirences i was stolen from). i don't wanna over-explain myself nor trauma dump on u, but basically i just wanna start over yk? i know nothing is impossible to loa, truly know, but this one wish makss me insecure cause that will mean i was born in 2007 instead of 2004 and my old classmates werent really my classmates which is okay cause i never liked them but instead i had different ones that i don't know? i don't know if i'm making sense here, sorry to be asking u these things but ur the only person i've seen talking about age change so i'll be very thankful to anything u have to say to me. hope u have a good day :)

This ask unironically made me frown, like so hard, knowing that manifesters like you have to ask if starting over is okay because of the heavy misrepresentation and misunderstanding of manifesters and shifters who age change.

My love, OF COURSE you can. I cannot believe we have come to the point, on the interent as a whole, that people feel that they need to ask permission on what to do with THEIR LIVES, because the all high and mighty LOA police feel like they have the right to dictate what others should and shouldn't do with their lives.

And God forbid you don't obey them because then they'll throw every derogatory name, they'll diagnose you with every mental illness they want to insult you with (that they don't even understand), they'll assume that utmost worst about you, and take to their side of the community to shame you infront of them all. It's genuinely appalling.

Which is why I finally reminded myself a couple years ago that these people are not my mum. I have free will to do what I want with MY LIFE and whatever they say are nothing more than opinions that I can literally choose to listen to or to ignore. I refuse to fall into the trap of giving power, MY power away to outsiders and let them control me because real talk now, what are they actually going to do? At the end of the day they can cry, shout, rip their hair out on camera an tell me how insne I am for not having the same views as them, but none of that's stopping me from sleeping with their mum AND dad in another reality

Long story short, my answer is yes, you can start over and change the year you were born hun. You can do whatever you want because this is your call. Do what YOU want, not whatever the LOA police deems acceptable by their beliefs

#had to get that off my chest yall #martini yaps!#anon ask #asks #shiftblr #desired reality #master manifestor #loa blog #law of assumption #4d reality #shifters #loa

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pinkyjulien · 9 months ago

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Informative post about what's currently going on involving Nexus Mods, Valerie Silverhand, Zwei/Rockergirlfriend, and others

I'll try to keep this as unbiased as possible Screenshots's source will stay anonym Feel free to ignore the post or to share it Most importantly, form your own opinions

▶ Links - Please read the post for context imgur album on current event | Zwei past behavior 2022 | Valerie's added context (available in the replies) | My own last conversation with Zwei

The post will link specific pictures from the linked imgur albums

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Last month, a Nexus User by the name AnciLove uploaded a V preset on Nexus Mods - now deleted

This preset share similarities with Zwei/Rockergirlfiend's V Whenever this was a bait or not doesn't really matter* (*see the 2022 album for why it doesn't matter)

Rockergirlfriend stepped in to call out the modder on their behavior Followed by MeltingAngels multiple comments on their mods and pictures

ValerieSilverhand decided to step in and report Rockergirlfriend's and MeltingAngels's harassements to NexusMods, using a throw away account

NexusMods are strictly against having multiple accounts; it backfired, resulting in a ban of her main account and the report being made public

ValerieSilverhand made a post on Twitter, sharing her stance against bullying

Multiple people are pointing out the public Nexus report, mentioning how Valerie herself was banned for harassement, which is technically false, the ban being for multiple accounts

Emmjay | Adshield | Lucent | BusyVampire | Sneaky

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Now for more context - Again, I will TRY to stay unbiased

I will start by sharing this imgur album, compiling posts from Idylla (@/IdillysSFW) who called out Zwei's behavior back in 2022

Zwei has been harassing people, either actively or passively, for the past 3 years; multiple proofs exist of this despite the fact that Zwei has the habit of deleting her DMs with people

⚠ Biased information / Personal experience Zwei and I used to interact back in 2022 and she often vented in our DMs about people's oc looking "too similar" to her own V for her comfort, often going into their DMs to "confront" them about the "copying" - Again, I do not have proof of it, the DMs being wiped on both sides

Back on topic with the current drama People who know the kind of person she is can be intimidated or scared of what she can do; even if the legal threats and laywers she use are fake, it can still affect someone's mental health greatly

Valerie Silverhand decided to create a throw away account to report Zwei's behavior to NexusMods, in the hope of staying anonymous

As mentioned in the begining of the post, it backfired In NexusMods's moderators eyes, Valerie had 4 accounts, which is strictly against the rules

In February 2024, Valerie created (and since deleted) an account to post this comment on one of BusyVampire mod BusyVampire reported the comment to Nexus In December 2023, her husband (who lives in the same house and share the same IP) posted this comment on one of Adshield mod Adshield reported the comment to Nexus I haven't found anything tied to the DawnJulio9403 account

NexusMods's Moderators, looking at Valerie's IP already being tied to two reported comments, banned her account(s) under the Multiple Accounts Abuse rule

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I am not involved in this situation but I choose to speak up about it, to write this post, for multiple reasons

The main reason being to educate/make people aware of Zwei's behavior before they choose to support her/side ""with her"" What is happening to Valerie Silverhand, this harassement from Zwei and her friends, isn't fair

It's easy to follow the loud crowd, especially when they are modders, virtual photographers that people look up to

But it's important to form your own opinion; and for that, it's necessary to know the full picture, to understand why something happened the way it did

We are all humans and we ALL make mistakes

I fully understand how frustrating it is to see someone, who did so much wrong to so many people, being praised, but creating side accounts to leave hateful comments on content you don't like isn't the way to go; use the block button, it's here to help you curate your space

Feeling icked or triggered by someone's OC doesn't give you any right to "claim" a look either; you can NOT harass people because their OC look "too similar" for your own comfort. Nobody owns vanilla CC options, nobody owns makeup or hair colors, and nobody other than Mike Pondsmith himself owns the terms "Rockerboy" and "Rockergirl"; once again, use the block button, curate your space

Despite my own stance and opinion on the matter, I'm not here to tell you who to """believe"""" / """"support"""" / whatever, take everything you see from anyone with a grain of salt

I simply hope this post can help those who are confused right now in what's going on, and to help y'all to form YOUR own opinion with all the informations I have available on the current situation (and I do not know/have access to everything either)

#cyberpunk 2077 #fandom drama #fandom wank #long post

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applestorms · 2 months ago

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where is the justice full lyrical analysis GO GO GO

TL;DR i'm of the opinion that many people give light a Lot more credit for being a Paragon of The People than he really deserves in this song, so i'd like to take a closer look at the (english) lyrics here-- not only to understand some of the deeper (highly questionable) ideas light is establishing/implying, but also why it may be especially easy to skip over those more dubious implications, unlike in other DN adaptations. see full analysis below the cut, this is Long.

[Light] Where is the justice When the guilty all go free? Why don’t we lock them up And throw away the key?

direct meaning: light begins this song questioning the effectiveness of the justice system. from these lines, it is clear he is questioning the fact that "the guilty" have the ability to "all go free," though it is unclear if he is criticizing the fact that some guilty parties are able to get away with their crimes or the simple fact that prisoners are free to return to society after serving their sentence.

while the first meaning seems potentially easier to assume, the next two lines perhaps point towards the second, implying that "the guilty," should be locked up forever-- typically, you don't throw away a key just to get it back later.

questionable implications: a couple things here. first, light has an underlying claim here that the meaning of "justice" is purely to punish the guilty, to quarantine them away from the rest of Good society. note that he is making this assumption without any clarification about who these "guilty" parties are, what crimes they have committed or otherwise. second, he is also setting up a kind of false dichotomy, saying that the guilty currently are free but the correct course of action is that they are instead locked away. again, no rehabilitation is possible under this view, and no nuance either.

[Light's Teacher] I see a young man’s anger Burning in your eyes;

direct meaning: light's teacher is pointing out light's naïveté ("young man"), though this criticism is softened somewhat by the fact that he also points out his passion for the subject. note that the light in light's eyes here is "anger," and the connotations associated with that emotion-- action, violence, a lack of clear logical thinking. light burns, quick and powerful, but with little discretion for the details.

implications: by describing light in this way, he is establishing light as a very emotionally-driven character, but also as one who has perhaps not had the time nor experience to fully think through his ideals. light's justice is a naïve retribution.

[Light] What you see is my impatience With your noble compromise;

direct meaning: light pushes back against his teacher's criticism, clarifying that his "anger" is more like "impatience," an annoyance with "your noble compromise." light is not stupid, according to himself, he understands the ways in which the legal system (which he sees his teacher as fully ascribing to) is supposed to work, but questions its effectiveness regardless.

to light, this legal system as it currents stands is a "noble compromise," something that people feel they Must stick to for the sake of upholding their noble character, but ends up leading to a questionable execution of justice, which compromises final judgements. i'm assuming this connects back to this page:

questionable implications: light's primary push in this song is towards a fully black and white justice system, wherein The Guilty are Punished and The Good receive Justice (the ability to see the guilty get punished). he is not willing to concede any gray morality here, no "compromise" ever. he is also very quick to write off the idea that he might be getting too caught up in his own emotions about injustice, ironically a bit of an emotional move.

[Light] Show me what’s right about the wrongs that we allow Real people need to feel protected here and now; This whole damn system’s broken way beyond repair It’s just law Not law and order; Not much good and seldom fair;

direct meaning: light continues to question why the legal system allows for what he sees to be compromises in the execution of justice, arguing that "real people," The Good, have the right to feel protected by such a system. he states his points overtly here: the legal system is broken, it is unordered, it is unfair. nothing good comes of it.

questionable implications: a few points. first, light is once again Very vague about what exactly these "wrongs," are that the legal system is allowing, which guilty are actually going free under which circumstances. second, light is assuming that "real people," which is itself quite frankly an incredibly loaded term when it comes to how dehumanized his view of The Guilty is, do not feel protected by the legal system, that The Good live in fear under a system that fails to guard them against evil.

i think people often get stuck on the line, "This whole damn system's broken way beyond repair," since it has the potential to greatly emotionally resonate, what with its underlying pessimism and cynical view about the world. even in my own views, there are plenty of systems that i think are plenty broken. where this line becomes questionable is again in how vague it is, allowing for many interpretations of exactly how the (legal) system is broken. take note of this not only in the context of how people interpret this song, but also for the next few lines in-context.

[Light's Classmate #1] Laws were made for everyone We’re treated all the same;

direct meaning: a classmate enters the conversation, stating a somewhat basic fact-- that the laws were created for everybody, and that everybody is all treated the same.

EDIT: actually, listening to this again, i genuinely can't tell if this is a classmate or light's teacher again?? regardless, i think my points still stand, just push the part about the other students being convinced by light to a bit later in the song.

(questionable) implications: a third party is now introduced with light's classmate here. this conversation between light and his teacher is not one-to-one-- there are other parties listening in the room who may be convinced one way or another depending on how the arguments go. thus, while this is a somewhat obvious statement on the surface, it is being stated in response to light to get him to expand on his claims.

i'd also like to bring up one point that i think may be relevant moving forward: the difference between normative and descriptive claims. in ethics, we typically use this to describe the difference between claims about how things should be versus how things already are.

light makes a lot of claims in this song that are presented as descriptive, implying that this is simply How The World/Legal System Already Is, that we are approaching a system that is already broken. he also makes a lot of claims about how the world should be, that justice should be this kind of starkly black and white Passing of Judgement-- these are the ones that he is less direct about, and that should be more closely questioned imo. don't mix em' up. anyways,

[Light] Till a lawyer’s tricks can fix the blame; What about the victims Waiting for some justice? How can we turn away And say that's just the way things are? What about the families Hiding in their houses All of them afraid to walk the street at night With all their doors locked tight Tell me where is the justice If there's any justice

direct meaning: light responds to his classmate's previous comment, arguing that the system is equal, but that stops once a lawyer can trick the system into allowing their client to go free. he continues, asking-- "What about the victims / Waiting for some justice?" once again painting The Good as pure, innocent victims, afraid to even walk along at night or leave their houses, living in Fear of evil that the legal system has so cruelly allowed to go free.

a very good couple lines in this section: "How can we turn away / And say that's just the way things are?" light wants change. he sees the system as "broken beyond repair," something that must be fully taken down and rebuilt into something better, to help people.

questionable implications: again, light is making the assumption that people already live in fear of Evil that lurks the streets, Good Families that need to be protected by the justice system. there is a non-zero number of universes where light fails to get the death note and ends up being a vigilante superhero, istg. he is also making the (descriptive) claim that victims do not receive the justice they deserve, presumably since The Guilty are Freed.

an interesting point there, actually-- justice for light is about the victims of crimes, not the perpetrators of them (who, as we already established, he doesn't actually see as "real people," not the "families" that need to be protected).

the one sympathetic point in all this that i find myself drifting back to is that big about actually wanting to change. he makes quite a good point about not assuming that this is how the world Must be-- i just find it unfortunate that his Ideal World is so horrendously flat.

[Light's Teacher] Your simple arguments have all been made before The world's not black and white The choice not either, or

direct meaning: light's teacher once again criticizes light's arguments for being surface level and overly black and white. i also think his point about light's arguments having, "all been made before," can connect to his previous point about light being naïve, that he simply hasn't had the experience to recognize that his supposedly New, Improved ideas for how the system can be fixed have already been presented and argued against.

[Light] Perhaps it's time we drain the color from within Till we're back to seeing black and white And wrong and right again

direct meaning: light argues back, saying that his teacher's push to see the nuance is pushing the compromise too far, that we are losing sight of some kind of true morality, "wrong and right," by taking such an approach.

questionable implications: not just questionable tbh, these lines are the most terrifying thing light says in the entire song. it's not even an implication either, really, he just says it outright here-- light wants a black and white justice system. he thinks the only way in which true law and order can be established is by giving up on nuance entirely.

i'm reminded a bit of han feizi's approach to crafting ideal legal systems a bit here, like the extremes of Two Options: Punishment (Death) or Reward (Everything You Could Possibly Dream Of/Desire). wonder if light's a fan...

[Light's Teacher] Overwrought pronouncements won't improve the paradigm [Light] Till lawyers cutting deals becomes a crime;

direct meaning: another back and forth between light and his teacher, with light's teacher once again calling light out on his "overwrought pronouncements," his strong, but overly emotionally-driven claims while light points again back to his strawman of the Corrupt Lawyer cutting deals to let The Evil Guilty go free.

implications: it interests me that light's teacher doesn't really argue against light's claims here by saying this image of this Lawyer doesn't exist, but instead keeps pointing to light's emotional state, how he's pushing for this so passionately but not really thinking through any of the greater implications of his claims. you could maybe see this as what makes the teacher's rebuttals less strong, that he doesn't seem to be matching light's passion with the same Excitement to meaningfully combat any of his underlying points, but i actually think this is quite a measured and good response. light isn't thinking very deeply about this, he's pushing from anger and trying to get the class on his side. it's a bit reminiscent of far right strategies-- hitting emotional buttons, getting the Crowd on your side, giving people hard hitting lines with little substance but no time to think it through. light really would benefit from trying to understand his emotions but but, i mean. what else is new LOL

[Light and Ensemble] Let the corporations make the regulations And all go unaccountable when everything goes wrong; Let the rich and famous get away with murder; Every time a high-priced mouth piece starts to talk His client gets to walk; Tell me where is the justice? If there’s any justice;

direct meaning: the ensemble is officially on light's side now, singing behind him as he throws out his criticisms of "the corporations," of, "the rich and famous," who can apparently get away with murder. notably, light is making a Money point here-- it's the rich, the corporate, who are able to get away with crimes.

questionable implications: uhh source?? is light trying to say that O.J. getting away with it means that the legal system has to kill all criminals for justice to be served? (#joke, i know, i know, he's japanese.)

this is where the normative vs. descriptive claims thing becomes really relevant to me. light, on the surface, is making descriptive claims about how the world Is-- that corporations decide what is and isn't justice, that anybody rich enough can do whatever they want, so long as they have enough to pay off a lawyer. and he may not be entirely off about all of these claims!! the problem here is instead to be found in his underlying normative claims, that the way to fix this is through a purely black and white legal system.

light presents this argument like he only has to sell you on the first part, on the fact that the System Is Broken and people can get away with horrible acts if they have enough money. at least in this section, he does not clarify What his justice is, or any of the horrible implications his ideal system to "fix" all of this might have, though he bounds those two points up in such a way that it feels natural to accept both.

this is where i think some people get the idea that light is a Comrade fighting Capitalism or some shit. it's quite easy to see and get on board with his descriptive claims about how broken the world is (feels), but lose sight of his underlying normative claims about how this Should be fixed. light doesn't think the problem is capitalism here, that's something You have to bring to the table-- but he keeps his arguments vague enough here that it's really easy to do so.

[Light] Where is the justice [Students] Tell me where? [Light] For all the victims? [Students] Tell me where? [Light] Where is the justice? What good is law that can’t punish those who break it?

direct meaning: similar points from before. again, light describes justice as something that must be found and given to "the victims" (of what?), calling the law useless for its inability to enact (his view) of justice (or what light thinks justice should be).

[Light's Classmate #2] Politicians make their speeches all day long; While judges pushing pencils mostly get it wrong; [Ensemble] Mostly get it wrong!

direct meaning: same thing, but he adds politicians to the list of those corrupt. the only thing i wanna add here is that the bit about "pushing pencils," is quite a nice bit of foreshadowing. anyway,

[Light's Classmate #3] Instead of loopholes for the laws to fall between; Let some good old fashioned payback Grease the wheels of the machine; [Ensemble] Grease the wheels of the machine

direct meaning: another classmate again arguing in favor of light's ideas, saying that we should drop the loopholes and morally gray areas to get some "good old fashioned payback," instead.

questionable implications: the class is really getting on board with light by this point in the song. note the shift also in the ideas they're presenting-- while classmates #1 and #2 were still mostly focusing on descriptive claims earlier, here classmate #3 points more towards light's normative claims about how the legal system should be. "good old fashioned payback," indeed.

also interesting that the claim they reiterate here is light's point about how the Only way a "victim" of [crime] could ever be fully satisfied or happy again is through this kind of state-mandated Revenge, that The Guilty must suffer/die/be locked away forever in order for The Good to live well. there's a lot of arguments against capital punishment to bring up against this point, but considering the length of this post as is, i don't think i really have the space for that =3=" regardless, i think this says a lot about light's worldview as is.

ANYWAYS. the rest of the song is basically just reiterations of the exact same lines light said before, notably including the lines about "families in their houses," and lots and lots of questioning about where that goddamn justice is. so, to end this off, i suppose i'll interrogate those more general points just a little-- both the title of the song itself, and its core themes in the context of the full story.

"Where Is The Justice?" is such a fascinating way of kicking off this musical, particularly in how it characterizes Justice itself as this lost thing that must be Found, setting up the idea that light himself playing the role of KIRA manages to Become Justice (or, his view of it, anyway). it is also interesting in how it show's light's relationship with the people around him, not only in terms of how he gets the rest of the class on his side by the end of the song, but also how his teacher critiques him earlier on. it's kind of a minor point, but i think that back-and-forth alone really does a lot to set up the space that L's character will inevitably fill later in the story, how he matches light's underlying Passion and Temperament (and lack of any care for deeper morals) in such a way that would lead to their mutual demise.

for all my frustrations with how this song is often interpreted, i actually think this is a pretty decent depiction of pre-KIRA light, at least within this format. my main critique is that i think it may perhaps be truer to believe that light never really comes to these kinds of conclusions until after he gets the notebook, but, hey. you can only have so many songs, and you've gotta start somewhere.

that being said... why do so many people so easily accept this song as a Real and Good critique of the justice system, even going so far as to say that musical light is somehow more morally good or righteous than any other depiction? (a point that i certainly Do Not agree with, if this post has somehow not already made that clear).

i suppose, to me, it all comes back to that normative vs. descriptive claims distinction. people emotionally resonate with the problems that light brings up, the evil that he sees in the world, and in particular his pessimism about the structures around us and questions about whether or not they actually do what they should.

what they fail to see, and what he somehow manages to get away through how carefully his arguments are crafted here, is the deeper implications of his solution-- the dehumanization of The Guilty, his dubious claims about the necessity of such a violent and stark Revenge to make the Good, Pure Victims feel truly safe or satiated, and all the many greater harms that come from such a complete lack of any nuance.

i believe it was @moonlarked who also brought up the fact that, unlike most other adaptations, we don't hear light's internal monologue here, meaning that we're not privy to the same kinds of snark or casual cruelty that light has the sense not to say out loud. in that sense, perhaps this song is actually one of the better depictions to show how light Can actually be quite a charismatic and convincing speaker, so long as you don't think too hard about what he's not saying out loud. (maybe that's why L got so insane about him? lol)

#death note #astronaut rambles #a somewhat desperate attempt to combat some of the surface level takes about this song that drive me crazyyy #which will almost inevitably keep happening but. y'know #i want some arguments/analysis set up regardless #this was actually kinda fun though i love analyzing shit like this. a very high school english class post here #long post #under a cut but still LMFAO #wrote this all in one sitting on a whim lets gooooo we're so fuckin' back #only very lightly proofread rn but whatever i'll fix any major errors later #light yagami #where is the justice #death note musical

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siddyyyyyyyy · 9 months ago

Text

No, I didn't.

Pairing: Father figure!Price (x reader) (PLATONIC)

wc: 1.8 kwarnings: daddy issueswhat, military stuff but i dont have much knowledge, no y/n used, no angst, don't worry

Summary: Captain is similiar to being your father figure and you accidentally call him "dad"!!!!!!!!!!!

a/n: (this thing has been rotting in my notes app for a while) there's no romantic plot in this one, just some thoughts I've had about Price and him being the 'dad' figure or something, enjoy

Working with the TaskForce141 is definitely a lot of work and needs a lot of training, being able to cope and deal with high stress situations. It's all not a big deal for you, since you've been training for this a long time anyway and have probably seen it all by now. From a pile of dead bodies to difficult decision making in order to save people. All this doesn't exactly affect you, at least not as hard as the very first time you experienced these things. After years and years of experience it started to just be another day at work, which doesn't mean it got boring. It's definitely not boring, and if you were honest with yourself for once, it feels like the team you're in makes it easier to get along with missions and makes them less stressful.

Kyle 'Gaz' Garrick is about the same age as you, if not only a few months older. He's mostly calm and respectful but won't let anyone disrespect anyone else or himself, always making sure to get his opinion straight and be open-minded for anything. It's great to talk to him, him having a smooth voice and being one of the pretty faces you've seen around. Your other teammate, Johnny 'Soap' McTavish is a pretty interesting person himself. A loyal soldier and a strong one at that aswell, his arms looking like he could rip a tree in half if he wanted to. His scottish accent always comes out thicker whenever he's angry or got a beer too much. But besides that, he is also a pretty good person to talk to, especially when needing some advice for relationships and other topics.

Simon 'Ghost' Riley must be one of the most mysterious people you've seen around. You know pretty much nothing about him, besides him liking his earl grey tea and silly little army jokes. He holds a lot to himself and keeps quiet almost always and looks like he could tear you apart if you breath the wrong way. But he actually wouldn't, being his teammate is safer than to be his enemy. Besides his cold nature and brutal way of handling things, he actually tries to care for his team in his own way too. Checking up on you from time to time on a difficult mission, mostly just to make sure you don't fuck it up. You're not the type to have a favorite in a group, but if you needed to decide, it would probably be John Price. Your very own Captian. He's cold, if not the coldest person you know, always being fast in decision making and not letting anyone get in his way, no matter what. Price always makes sure to be there for his team too, cracking a few small 'dad jokes' then and there if the time is right.

Now, you're all waiting in the middle of a desert for a vehicle to pick you up after another successful mission. It was a mission that went on for several days but it was great, with minor difficulties. As your sitting on the sand, while making sure the sun doesn't give you a stroke, the others are talking about the mission. Well, just the few funny or minor mistakes they did while on mission. Soap is telling about how he accidentally let his magazine fall to the ground while reloading and almost slipped on a rock while doing so. But he got up and continued with the mission as usual, so it wasn't serious and just something to laugh about. After a few chuckles and jokes, Price spoke up and mentioned you, doing something similar.

»I saw you once throw a magazine out instead of a granade. Just giving out free ammunition like that.«

He teased you a little about it while mostly just Johnny and Kyle laughed about it with Price, lightheartedly teasing you about it some more. After another one of the Captains typical dad jokes, you finally speak up as you got enough of them.

»Okay, stop it dad.« You scoff lightly with a slight headshake, realizing only a few seconds later what you actually said. You're met with silence for a moment before Johnny cracks up and chuckles, not able to hold it back in.

»Did I hear you right, there? Did you just call him-«

»Enough. I didn't say anything.« You interrupt and stand up from your sitting spot on the sand, dusting your pants off. The truck arrives just in time, sparring you from any more embarrassing stuff happening to you for now. Price is genuinely suprised about you calling him that, not having thought anyone from his team could see him as something like a father figure. He doesn't mind that much anyway but also thinks he isn't that old. Eventually, he doesn't bring it up, not wanting to make you uncomfortable and he doesn't really think too much of it at the end of the day.

⋇⋆✦⋆⋇

　Something similar happens another time, two or three months after the first 'incident', how you call it. The moment since you accidentally called your Captain dad, you promised to focus way more on what you say as if you didn't already do that all the time.

Once in the mess hall to eat dinner, you couldn't help but feel more tired than usual. Probably because you didn't catch much sleep last night or maybe because you had a lot of paperwork that day, either way you felt rather tired but nothing too bad for you to handle. You're sitting at the right corner of the table while eating with the rest at one of the tables, eating peacefully while listening to the conversations around you. Sometimes listening to the small drama from a table across or just trying to see who else is eating dinner in the mess hall aswell. The food is nothing special, just the usual mashed potatoes, some sauce and meat to it. Salad is also there for everyone. Even though the food isn't bad, you can't help but want more salt in it, feeling like it hasn't got enough of it. Glancing up from your food, you see that Price is sitting closest to the salt shaker. Without much thinking you speak up, looking at him while asking.

»Dad, could you pass me the salt?« You ask casually and wait for him to hand you the salt shaker, not having realized yet what you really said for now. He shrugs and hands it over to you over the table, keeping a straight face as if nothing's wrong.

»Sure, kiddo.« It's a bit strange for him to call you 'kiddo' right now, but you don't question it and pour some salt into your food. Price continues to eat his own food, but you can't help but notice how silent it became around the table for some reason. Before you could look up again, Johnny chimes in.

»Didn't know you were his kid.« He nudges your shoulder softly and waits for your reaction, carefully watching how you react. You're a bit confused and look to him next to you, the gears in your head finally turning. Kyle can't help but smirk slightly at this whole thing as he tries to continue eating, turning his head away a bit.

»No- it's.... I didn't- what?« You stumble over your words while trying to explain this, eventually getting frustrated with yourself. Your back leans back against your chair while sighing out, being ready to gaslight them about this slip up. »It's alright. Happens.« Price reassures you even though he has a very faint smirk on his own lips about the situation, just not addressing it as much as Johnny.

»It's not the first time this happened, right?« Kyle's the one to tease you this time, looking over to you at the table all the while you're hiding your face a bit again.

»No, nothing never happened.« You shake your head and just continue eating your food more quickly, so you can escape this situation as fast as possible.

The conversations around the table return to its usual after a moment, no one addressing it anymore afterwards. Ghost was always just observing your reactions and the situation itself in both times it happened, having noticed a few things.

For example that it happened when you looked tired or when you were seemingly relaxed, speaking from your body language. Or how your ears become increasingly more red the moment you realise what happened, making it more amusing for him to watch your reaction. But of course he wouldn't mention any of those things, especially not to the whole group since it could come off a bit weird. He keeps it to himself but still can't help but tease you subtly about it during a round of joking in the team, mostly just addressing how easily something can embarrass you.

But to say he's the only who noticed that, is wrong. Price was probably the first person to notice those things about you, finding it also amusing in a way. He doesn't exactly mind you calling him 'dad' sometimes by accident but when it happens, he mostly thinks about why you do it. Probably having no proper father figure in your life or maybe he just reminds you of your own father. Maybe it's just the personality he gives off, making it seem like he's the fatherly one in the team. Either way, he finds it mostly wholesome, knowing he makes his team feel comfortable around him. But he keeps quiet about it, not wanting to embarass you even though he finds it oddly amusing to see how you act once something embarrassing or humbling happens to you.

But you on the other hand, you don't find it amusing at all. You're ready to launch at them the moment something remotely humbling happens in front of them, ready to gaslight them if it means they'll forget about one small thing. But you don't do it, considering they're your team mates and you're all almost equally strong. But even though they don't make seriously fun of you and tell you it's all jokes at the end of the day, you still can't help but feel even a little embarrassed about it. It's like having a small crisis to yourself, not sure what others think about you now or how you should act from now on around them. But that's just you being dramatic. Mostly.

#cod #cod mw2 #price cod #captian price #daddyissues?#wip #small story #maladaptive daydreaming #or something #i dont know if this is fluff or just cringe wattpad story level but here you go #someones gonna like it anyway (me)#john price #captain john price #price mw2

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ghostflowerhotpotch · 9 months ago

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How do you think the spider gang would react to Gwen coming out as trans? I think they'd all be supportive, but I'm curious if you have details

I am going to be honest with you anon, I had been looking at this question for weeks, thinking about it, and...I am not coming up with much.

I am trans, I don't have that much experience with people reacting to that- and I am not making any more comments about that.

Going back to the original question- I think all of them would be supportive; regardless of background or history, I feel doing anything else would be a disservice to the characters, and also, a type of story I really don't have interest entertaining, (Would Noir, being from 40s, be reasonable to have his apprehensions and need to overcome it? Yes, I am interested in seeing something like that? Personally, fuck no.)

Now, it doesn't mean there cannot be hiccups- all well intending, of course.

(Specific characters under the cut because, as always with me, it got long.)

Peter B I see going over the top; talking how brave Gwen is, and that he supports her no matter what, he also reads a book on trans people and tell hims about the people in his universe who are trans. Gwen appreciates it, but it can be uncomfortable at times.

Noir, regardless of time period, would be supportive, but mixes up terminology. The poor guy already struggles with the pop culture lingo, so throwing queer lingo into the mix can make things awkward; specially since, as a spider-man, he has defended the marginalized people of his dimension and is aware of the community, but- that community had its own terminology that may not be appreciated to day. Is a growing curve.

In my opinion, Ham is a much of a man as Bugs Bunny, meaning gender isn't as important as commitment to the bit; so I can see him busting a dress all of the sudden and saying "I get you sis." Accordingly, if asked about his own gender, he is pretty much "normally a guy, but in general whatever fits better with the scene."

Peni I headcanon as nonbinary, so I think she would be happy to meet another person who isn't cis. Definitely would have lots of talk about presentation, tricks for clothes a make up, the works.

Margo is cool about it, there isn't much to say there; she just tells Gwen that it doesn't change anything between them, and she is still invited to come for the slumber parties (Margo has thrown a bunch in the Spider-Society, because anything to spend as little time mentally at home as possible.)

Pavitr: "Oh so you are like a hijra? That's so cool!" (This is a term from a place I am not from, so I can't talk in length about it, feel free to look it up because it is indeed, very cool.) While not the same, he ends up telling more about how people in his dimension see transgender people, Gwen finds it overall really interesting.

Hobie is, of course, cool about it. He is a punk, noncomformist, and "hates labels," he could probably tell Gwen a stupid amount of things about queer history, intersectionally, so far and so forth. Despite using he/him pronouns, I believe with all my heart Hobie would not give a shit about gender roles and dress how he likes, and be okay with any pronouns. This has nothing to do with your question, but I headcanon that Hobie has been the queer awakening of many other teens of the Spider-Society as he strolls down in whatever outfit he feels like it.

Now Miles, is obviously supportive. I think he may be oblivious to many things (I headcanon him as bi for a long awhile, but I am not sure if that's something he knows already or has yet to discover,) so he asks questions, but is always respectful and has no trouble answering. Overall, Gwen thinks is cute how much Miles dotes on her, and reminding her that she will always be the prettiest girl alive to him.

Huh, I guess I had more to say that I expected, this was fun! Thanks for the question and sorry for the delay.

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jerich0two · 1 year ago

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Hi! I don't know if your ace or not, and if this question makes you uncomfortable ignore it, but is it possible for ace people to like, stop being ace if they find the right person? I just feel rlly guilty about reading alastor fics knowing that he's ace and ig this would make me have peace of mind or smth?

I am ace! But I can't speak on behalf of all aces, since everyone's experience is different. There aren't any “rules” to live by as an ace person. Honestly, you can do whatever you want and still be ace. You can also use the label and then find it doesn't fit you anymore, no harm done. That being said… the idea that asexual people will “stop being ace if they find the right person” is a very dodgy one. From what I've seen/read, it tends to be used to invalidate the ace identity. People on the asexual spectrum can and do take partners, and some people end up feeling sexual attraction (demisexuals and grey-aces, for example), but that doesn't make them any less ace.

(more thoughts below the cut-off)

I'll throw in my personal opinion here (since this is my blog!): with Alastor specifically, canonically he seems uninterested in sex at the very least, and maybe even sex-repulsed. I don't think the people writing Alastor fics or drawing ship art are being malicious, and the same goes for the people consuming that content. Go right ahead and read those Alastor fics if you want. Personally, I don't care. I've seen some posts on here from other (aro)ace people endorsing the writing and reading of that kinda thing! But IMO, it’s been disappointing to see Alastor's canon identity thrown out so frequently in favour of making shipping/sexual content. There are so many other characters you could be shipping! And I don't think the vast majority of people are thinking to themselves, “he's ace, but there are so many different ways to be ace, and I'd like to explore that for his character”, they're just using it as an excuse to ignore his identity and give him the same treatment as the rest of the cast. But again, I don't think (most) people are being malicious. Just (maybe wilfully) ignorant.

Anyway, sorry for the ramble! If you really feel guilty about reading Alastor fics, find fics with other characters you can comfortably enjoy. I reckon that'd be a better time for everyone haha /lh

(And do keep in mind that this is my personal opinion. Other aces might feel differently! If you think I've spoken out of turn here, feel free to let me know – I'm not used to talking about my identity online ^^”)

#asexual #asexuality #hazbin hotel alastor #alastor #sorry to the people who followed me for art and got this in their feed instead #jeri's ask tag

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mywitchyblog · 6 months ago

Text

@shiftmaxxer

masterlist

In response to your post:

Thank you for your thoughtful contribution. It’s refreshing to engage in a counter-argument and have meaningful discussions that don’t devolve into insults or death threats. This kind of respectful dialogue is what allows for growth and understanding, even when we don’t see eye to eye.

Part 1: Clarifying Intent and Addressing Misrepresentation

First and foremost, it seems there may have been some misunderstandings regarding the purpose of my original post and the intentions behind it. I understand that you’re critiquing my previous rant, which I admit was written in a heated moment. In hindsight, I recognize that I should have taken the time to calm down before writing, as it might have conveyed my thoughts more clearly and without the emotional charge.

You mentioned, and I quote: "Calling other people of color 'pathetic' for what I believe to be perfectly understandable reactions to race-changing is reductive." I want to clarify that this was not my intention at all. The individuals I labeled as "pathetic" were those who, unlike you, resort to insults and threats, using logical fallacies as their only arguments—arguments that aren’t even valid to begin with.

The only other instance where I used the word "pathetic" in that post was in reference to certain white individuals who oppose race-changing without providing proper arguments. Here’s the passage in question: "As a person of color, this issue is especially relevant to me, yet the opposition I see frequently comes from individuals who don’t share my lived experiences—often white people who have no stake in the matter, telling me what I should or shouldn’t do. They’ll throw around terms like 'DNI,' 'I don't wanna argue with you,' 'if you support race-changing, block me,' or brand me as a bad person without engaging in any meaningful dialogue. It proves that they are cowards, pathetic, and that their claims hold no weight and reek of insecurity."

This quote is crucial because it explains why I referred to these individuals as insecure and pathetic: they immediately resort to name-calling without providing proper explanations. The "bad person" I referenced is someone who attacks me with labels like "racist" or even "pedophile"—terms that have nothing to do with the actual debate at hand. This is an example of a Strawman Fallacy because it misrepresents my argument by suggesting I called all POC "pathetic," which wasn’t the case. My criticism was aimed specifically at those who rely on insults and threats rather than valid arguments.

Part 2: Addressing Claims of Hostility and Spite

You also pointed out that I "completely dismiss any opposing arguments, calling it 'close-minded.'" Yes, I agree—logical fallacies and insults are indeed close-minded arguments. The only counter-argument I had is the one I mentioned earlier; feel free to check it out. So yes, I called it close-minded because that’s exactly what it is. Furthermore, accusing me of writing with ChatGPT is an Ad Hominem Fallacy, which targets my character rather than engaging with the substance of my arguments.

Regarding your statement: "You've stated yourself that you argue in a way to 'spite' people who oppose your opinion." Let me clarify—spite plays a dual role in my approach. On one hand, I genuinely want to uplift and educate people, sharing knowledge and perspectives that can help others grow and expand their understanding. On the other hand, there’s a part of me that’s driven by a desire to challenge and provoke—to make people think harder and question the status quo. Sometimes, that means making people uncomfortable or challenging their deeply held beliefs, especially when those beliefs are rooted in ignorance or prejudice. It’s about making them confront their biases to the point where their limited thinking is forced to evolve—or at the very least, be exposed.

And yes, I will not budge on the point that ad hominem attacks, threats, and insults are not acceptable forms of argumentation. They don’t contribute to meaningful discourse, and they certainly don’t challenge or strengthen any position.

You mentioned that my tone "is hostile and full of what I see as 'conversation enders' (you argue in a way that shuts down discourse rather than encourages it)." I apologize if my tone came across that way; it was not intended to be hostile. In the future, I’ll make an effort to use better disclaimers and perhaps even include tone tags to ensure that my intent is clear. My aim was never to shut down conversation but to challenge the status quo and encourage intelligent debate, free of ad hominem attacks—much like the approach you’ve taken in your response.

Part 3: Hypocrisy and Nuance in Race-Changing Discussions

You also raised the point that I’m "hypocritical for disregarding the value of people's hurt and frustrations and calling it a desire to be 'empathetic.'" This is not the case. In my essay, I acknowledged that there’s a fine line between empathy and the potential for fetishization, romanticization, and even racism if not handled carefully. For example, I specifically stated that "race-changing in reality shifting can serve as a unique and valuable tool for promoting intercultural understanding, challenging racial prejudices, and fostering a more empathetic and inclusive society" when done thoughtfully and ethically (Essay, Part I). If I were truly disregarding these concerns, I wouldn’t have included the parts of my essay where I emphasized the importance of treading lightly and being considerate.

Initially, I planned to argue that race-changing was entirely okay and not disrespectful at all. However, as I continued writing, I recognized the need to include those critical nuances—because nothing in this world is black and white. Consequently, I changed the direction of my essay to reflect this, and I quote myself: "By maintaining this careful balance, race-changing in reality shifting can serve as a unique and valuable tool for promoting intercultural understanding, challenging racial prejudices, and fostering a more empathetic and inclusive society. As with any powerful tool, its value lies not in the practice itself, but in how we choose to use it."

Originally, I might have said something like "Race-changing is okay and a good thing," but instead, I concluded, "Race-changing can be a good thing, but we need to be careful not to be disrespectful, as we have a duty and responsibility."

Part 4: Loaded Questions and Hasty Generalizations

You asked: "You would rather shift to be another race to 'understand' a race than engage with their media, their lived, documented experiences, or talk to others about their experiences? Are others' experiences meaningless to you unless you physically ARE them? If you lack that amount of empathy that you have to become another race, I don't think empathy was ever in the cards for you." I’m not sure if you’re addressing me directly here, but I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt.

As for me, I never stated or implied that in my previous posts. Moreover, asserting that race-changers shift to another race because the experiences of POC are meaningless to them, ergo they never had any empathy to begin with, is a Hasty Generalization Fallacy. Additionally, the framing of the question is a Loaded Question Fallacy because it presumes a lot about my intentions without evidence, and frames the question in a way that makes any answer seem incriminating. It's an unfair setup.

In my essay, I made it clear that "shifting allows for experiencing life through different perspectives which can be enlightening as fuck" (Essay, Part I). The goal is not to dismiss or undermine anyone’s experiences but to gain a deeper understanding through direct experience in another reality, which is a legitimate and complex method of exploring identity and empathy.

Part 5: The Complexity of Reality Shifting and Allegory in Fiction

You also wrote: "For people from the racial identities being appropriated, witnessing individuals casually adopt and discard their race can be distressing. It can feel as though their experiences and struggles are being reduced to mere fantasy elements rather than being respected and understood. This disregard can contribute to feelings of marginalization and invalidate the real-life challenges faced by those of different races."

I completely agree with you that this can be distressing, and I cannot invalidate your feelings—you are entitled to them. However, I must disagree with the notion that race-changing "invalidates the real-life challenges" faced by those of different races, simply because in the context of reality shifting, the line between "real" and "fake" life blurs. If you meant "OR," then I retract my disagreement.

However, to suggest that some race-changers do this with the intention of causing this effect on POC is reductive. As a POC myself, if someone were to tell me they shifted to a reality where they are the same race as I am and then shared their experiences of discrimination, I would feel a sense of joy that they finally understand my pain—rather than dismissing it in this reality with statements like "Oh, come on, you’re exaggerating," or "It’s not so bad after all." Like, why don’t you walk in my shoes before saying that? Oh wait, they did, and now they get it.

You stated: "Being black and being a 'werewolf' aren't comparable in any version of reality. To trivialize a lived experience of an inconceivable number of people (because remember, this is the multiverse) is extremely bold." I have never trivialized or reduced the pain of other POC or marginalized communities. I merely pointed out that they share some similarities in that they are perceived as monstrous, discriminated against, and persecuted. The difference, of course, is that one is considered fictional in this reality, and the other is not.

It is you who is being bold by claiming they have nothing in common. Consider that some writers create fictional races as allegories for what marginalized communities face in our world. A prime example is the Na’vi from Avatar. James Cameron, the director of Avatar, explicitly stated: "Avatar very pointedly made reference to the colonial period in the Americas, with all its conflict and bloodshed between the military aggressors from Europe and the indigenous peoples. Europe equals Earth. The Native Americans are the Na'vi. It's not meant to be subtle."

In this context, someone shifting to be a Na’vi could be seen as analogous to race-changing to be a Native American, only with a superficial, fantastical layer added on top—a "pink bow" if you will. While the Na’vi might be fictional, their creation is deeply rooted in the real experiences and histories of Native Americans, particularly their suffering at the hands of colonial forces. The narratives of exploitation, resistance, and survival embodied by the Na’vi are direct reflections of those faced by Indigenous peoples.

Thus, shifting to become a Na’vi in a desired reality is not just adopting a fictional identity but engaging with the complex and painful history that the Na’vi represent. Whether or not the person shifting acknowledges this connection, the allegory remains. The act of shifting to a race that is explicitly crafted as a stand-in for a real marginalized group comes with inherent implications, making it far more than a mere fantasy element.

Therefore, equating the Na'vi with werewolves, and dismissing the deeper connections between these fictional and real marginalized groups, misses the point entirely. The comparison trivializes the intent behind these allegories, reducing complex social and historical narratives to mere fantasy. It's not bold to recognize these connections—it's simply understanding the truth of how fiction often reflects reality.

Part 6: Logical Fallacies and the Nature of Empathy

Regarding your statement: "Discrediting one's lived experiences (ergo, attacking their credibility) is not just questioning the validity of their personal story; it's denying the nuanced realities that intertwine us as people. If you can do that so easily, how can you become better and more understanding from rcta alone?" If I were discrediting my fellow POC’s experiences, I wouldn’t have brought a nuanced perspective to the subject. I acknowledged that it’s a topic that requires careful handling and that it’s not black and white, even though I tried to simplify it but couldn’t.

However, your assertion that "It won’t fix or better your empathy because you already lack it from the way you react to those who don’t agree with the practice" is an Ad Hominem Fallacy. You’re attacking my character without providing evidence to support your claim that I lack empathy.

In my essay, I discussed how "morals and ethics are not universal constants but are shaped by cultural, temporal, and situational factors" (Essay, Part I). This underscores the importance of understanding that empathy and moral considerations can vary greatly depending on the context and the reality in which they are applied.

Part 7: Nuanced Perspectives and False Dichotomy

Finally, I want to emphasize that it’s okay to feel offended by those who race-change. I won’t dictate your feelings—you are entitled to them. But you also need to acknowledge that not everything is black and white; not everyone who engages in race-changing does so to invalidate or trivialize the lives and experiences of other people of color.

You said: "But refusing to be accountable for the real reasons you race change (and why at least 50% of us shift) is disingenuous." If I were truly being disingenuous, as you claim, why would I have written in my essay that the issue is nuanced? By acknowledging the fact that we must tread lightly and be careful, I’ve already implicitly stated that those people exist. If I didn’t acknowledge that fact, I wouldn’t have discussed it at all.

You also mentioned: "There is no morality play. People don’t shift races to 'grow' or just because they're 'curious'. You make such an (understandably) loaded and controversial topic more innocent and sweet than it is." Let me stop you right there. I do not make a controversial topic more innocent and sweet than it is—I made it more nuanced.

Stating that race-changing is inherently bad is a False Dichotomy Fallacy; it reduces the topic to two simplistic notions when there are other perspectives. I acknowledge that some POC may be offended by it. But they must also acknowledge that not everyone who engages in race-changing does so to trivialize their experiences—quite the opposite.

How many POC (myself included) have been so sick and tired of having people dismiss our pain, wanting them to understand instead of diminishing it? I can’t recall the number of times I wanted those people to walk a mile in my shoes just to see what it feels like. And with shifting, they can.

Part 8: Conclusion and Invitation for Further Discussion

You concluded with: "It makes you someone who can't and won't make room for those who feel invalidated by those who race-change frivolously." So, what do you propose we should do? I specifically said in my post that we shouldn’t be frivolous about it—that we have a responsibility and a duty when engaging in such practices. And yes, I admit that saying "DNI," or "block me if you support race-changing," may have been too much, but when those same people are the ones who insult and threaten me, I cannot be blamed for making such assumptions about them.

To conclude, I really enjoyed your respectful perspective on the subject. However, stating that people who race-change immediately do it for disrespectful reasons is simply wrong. You should understand that nothing in Reality Shifting is purely good or bad, black or white; it is a spectrum of gray.

I’m also quite curious to hear your stance on bi/multiracial shifters who choose to change or "suppress" one of their races.

Ergo i have to refute those arguments, it was delightful to debate with you.

I wish you good luck and success in your shifting journey

Kind regards,

Luno

#reality shifting #shiftblr #desired reality #shifting #shifting community #shifting realities #shifters #reality shift #reality shifter #shifting antis dni

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astrojulia · 2 years ago

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Pluto transits in the Natal Chart

~ Pluto in the Houses

1ST HOUSE

You have the power to take control of your life and not let anyone else dictate it anymore. During this transit, things you've kept hidden may come to the surface, and you might find yourself throwing some tantrums without really knowing why. But don't worry, you'll also be able to see people for who they really are and understand what drives them. This is a great time for personal transformation, where you can change your image and yourself at a deeper level. However, you might experience some intense situations or people that could be a bit overwhelming. So, it's best to avoid anyone or anything that seems subtle and embrace the positive changes in your life..

When Pluto crosses your Ascendant, it's time to break free from traditional thought patterns and be a role model for others. To make the most of this, try to connect with the forces that shaped you and made you who you are, based on the sign that was on your first house at birth, and your Pluto sign at birth. This will help you to have more control over your unconscious motives that might have caused compulsions or irrational obsessions in the past..

You might feel a strong urge to control everything and everyone, which could create difficulties in your relationships. But remember, the key is to learn to control yourself and see yourself in a positive light. This is an opportunity to discover new resources and values within yourself. You might feel like you have too much power, which could push people away from you. But don't worry, this transit will bring about a huge change in your image and the way you express yourself..

2ND HOUSE

The key to success during this time is to be completely honest with yourself about what you want. If you know what you want, you'll be more likely to accomplish your goals. However, explanations will be necessary under certain circumstances, so don't be afraid to speak your mind. Your opinions and behavior regarding what you value and what matters to you will be influenced by outside forces. It's important to understand that nothing really belongs to you and everything you give or receive will come back to you in some way..

But let's be real, living in a materialistic society can make it hard to let go of the anxiety about social status and the benefits that come with wealth. During this period, you might be focused on increasing your income and raising your social and professional status. However, it's important to remember the philosophical lesson of this transit: understanding the place that money and position have in your life..

This transit marks the beginning of a metamorphosis that started when Pluto was in your first house. You might be going through a stage of collapse because what you once valued and appreciated about yourself and life no longer serves you. It's a time to learn to move forward with fewer resources and not hold on to any possessions or forms of income that you were once accustomed to..

It's important to efficiently manage all your possessions, including your ideas, principles, inherited values, and the money you earn. It's a challenge to review how you use these possessions or energies to achieve a spiritual ideal. If transiting Pluto makes oppositions or squares to personal planets, there might be economic and material losses. So, avoid any dishonest business practices. But don't worry, soon you will find a priceless inner wealth..

3RD HOUSE

When transiting Pluto is in your third house, you'll have a strong intuition that will make it hard for others to keep secrets from you. You might even go to extreme lengths to get the information you need, like snooping around or invading someone's privacy. Be careful though, because even if you succeed in getting the info you want, it could really damage your relationships with those people. During this time, it's important to take care of the small stuff, because neglecting even minor details could have serious consequences. Your ideas and way of communicating will become more serious and confident, and you'll start paying more attention to your immediate surroundings and the people you interact with on a daily basis. This is a time for personal growth and self-reflection, and you may find yourself questioning things that used to seem trivial or unimportant. Don't be afraid to speak your mind, even if it means offending people you see every day. It's also important to use your intelligence and really think through any important decisions or contracts before signing anything. If Pluto makes difficult aspects to other planets while it's transiting your third house, be extra careful during short trips or when you're on the road, as there could be a higher risk of accidents..

4TH HOUSE

Over the next few years, you're going to go through some major changes in your relationship with your parents. It might be time for you to break away from them if you've been relying on them too much. Don't be scared, because in the long run, you'll have the opportunity to express your individuality in new and exciting ways that you may not have even considered before. But let's be real, it's going to be tough. It might feel like the ground is shifting beneath your feet and everything you thought was stable is starting to crumble. This can be pretty daunting, especially if you're not someone who loves change. But on the flip side, this is an opportunity for growth and transformation..

During this period, you'll likely be experiencing a lot of intensity and excitement when it comes to your family and home life. Your family members might be going through some major changes, or you might even move house. It's important to take a deep dive into your personal life and be open to change on a deep level. You might not feel like the same person by the end of this period, but that's okay!.

It will bring up a lot of personal issues from your childhood, so get ready to do some self-reflection. This is the time to make sure you're staying true to yourself and being self-sufficient. You'll be faced with power struggles with your parents, and might feel like they're treating you like a kid when you're trying to be independent. But ultimately, this period will bring significant change that will help you grow and transform..

5TH HOUSE

This time can really mess with your gambling impulses, so don't go crazy with it or you'll risk losing big. Same goes for stocks – keep most of your retirement funds safe, especially if Pluto's making any stressful aspects while it's in this house. You might get obsessed with sports, games, or hobbies too, so have fun, but don't go overboard.If you're into art or something creative, you can make some amazing stuff during this transit. And when it comes to your relationships, they can be super therapeutic for you. Your connection with your kids will be intense, and everything you do with them will have a big impact on their future.Just be careful not to pressure your kids too much, or let them pressure you into doing things you're not comfortable with. And make sure to take care of their health..

When it comes to love, you might find yourself totally infatuated with someone who's totally wrong for you. It's like your subconscious is pushing you to do something you don't really want to do. Even if you're already in a relationship, things will get super intense and you'll go through a major transformation. If you and your partner can get through all the drama during this transit, your love will last forever!.

One thing to watch out for is letting your emotions run wild, especially in love, social life, or career. And if Pluto's making tough aspects to other planets, you might experience some occasional losses due to speculation..

6TH HOUSE

During this time, you might feel like improving your physical health and trying out some new ways of taking care of your body. Maybe you'll be interested in some alternative health methods, but don't go overboard and end up doing more harm than good. Your daily routine might go through some changes, whether it's something you initiate or others around you. If you've been thinking about getting a checkup, now might be a good time. You could also start a new diet or exercise routine if you want..

When Pluto transits your sixth house, it's time to focus on serving a noble cause and developing your endurance in the face of pain, disappointment, and personal failures. Be careful not to lose yourself in excessive self-sacrifice, though. Instead, aim for total dedication to a cause that helps you grow beyond just seeking ego gratification. Make sure to take care of yourself and your personal relationships along the way..

This is a good time for regenerative therapies, both physical and psychological. If you start taking care of your body now, you can regenerate it even if you haven't been paying attention to it in recent years. Just make sure to keep up with your diet too. And watch out - if Pluto makes difficult aspects, you might encounter some health problems..

7TH HOUSE

During this period you gotta be totally honest about what you want from others and what you expect from them. It's all or nothing! When Pluto is cruising through your seventh house, you might try to control or manipulate those around you, or someone more powerful might try to do that to you. The good news is that you can also build strong alliances that benefit everyone involved. There might even be some karmic connections happening, where you work together with others and let them work with you equally. But, you'll need to revise all your social connections, and some of them might crumble while new ones emerge. This isn't always easy and can be accompanied by some painful relationship revelations..

Pluto in your seventh house is a big deal when it comes to relationships. You'll need to release any hidden tensions and transform the way you approach relationships, whether they're intimate or professional. This period is all about finding balance in love and any connection between two people. You might even meet someone who will change your life forever, or lead to marriage. Keep in mind that whoever you meet during this time will have a strong impact on you, but it's because they're reflecting your innermost desires. So, don't blame others for what's going on inside you..

If Pluto is making some tough aspects, you might face conflicts over finances, alimony, or even sexual problems. But, with a positive attitude and an open mind, you can handle anything that comes your way..

8TH HOUSE

During this period, you'll be dealing with some pretty heavy transformation-related stuff. It could mean a major change in your life, like someone close to you passing away, or you facing a deeper aspect of your true self. When Pluto comes into play, it stirs up some intense emotions, and past issues might resurface. But hey, being honest and intense is where it's at! Just be aware that you might have to make some sacrifices to reach your goals, especially if Pluto is in your eighth house. It's like a death and rebirth kinda deal. You might find yourself getting into psychology, magic, or occult sciences during this time. Oh, and some secrets might be revealed too. If you're into that kind of stuff, you could even get an initiation in occult circles. The eighth house is all about new beginnings, and getting rid of the old. So, some outdated aspects of your life might disappear to make way for new things. But be careful with joint possessions and resources, you don't want to get into debt or let someone else control you. And watch out, if Pluto is making difficult aspects to other planets, it could put your life or someone close to you in danger. Natural disasters or big forces like politics, economics, or the military could also shake things up. But on the upside, this time could also stimulate some latent clairvoyant powers or sexual impulses, if that's your thing..

9TH HOUSE

When Pluto moves into your ninth house, things are going to get pretty interesting. You're going to feel the urge to expand your horizons and gain more knowledge, which will empower you like never before. You'll start taking a deeper interest in other cultures and if you travel abroad, you'll be totally transformed by the experience. You'll become much more interested in higher education, culture, and spiritual growth. If you weren't interested before, you'll definitely start feeling the urge to learn more and get some self-education. And if you're a communicator, your ideas will be taken much more seriously and you'll learn how to present them in a more compelling way..

But watch out, because there's a downside. You could become obsessed with gathering information and using it as a weapon to manipulate or control people. And if Pluto is in a difficult aspect with other planets, you might become fanatical about your beliefs and even get involved in foreign wars. So be careful and remember that everyone has their own beliefs that deserve respect..

If you're lucky, you might also get some financial aid or government scholarships for higher education, or get opportunities to travel for business or scientific purposes. And you might even have some mind-blowing experiences that cause you to rethink your entire worldview. So get ready for an exciting ride!.

10TH HOUSE

If you wanna make it big and succeed in life, you gotta have purpose and determination. Ain't nobody gonna control your future, so don't let 'em. Trust me, you'll regret it if you do. When transiting Pluto is in your 10th house, it's time to get serious about your life path. You can't just float along and expect things to fall into place. Nope, life will throw you some curveballs that will force you to make important decisions. Don't be scared though, this is your chance to transform yourself and your perspective on the future. Pluto in your 10th house makes you super ambitious and determined to succeed. But be careful, 'cause you might end up wanting to control and dominate everything and everyone. That's why you gotta be aware of authority figures trying to hold you back. Pluto challenges you to reach your life goals, so figure out what they are and go for it! Just make sure you stay true to yourself and don't get caught up in power struggles or political schemes. Remember, the key to success is honesty and integrity..

11TH HOUSE

This is a time when you gotta be real with yourself. No BS allowed. You need to figure out what makes you truly happy and go after it. As time goes on, you'll start taking your work and relationships more seriously. And let me tell you, when Pluto is in your 11th house, it's all about serving others and making connections with your homies and organizations. You might even form a strong bond with a kiddo who's not even related to you! Happiness during this phase is gonna come from the people around you and how you contribute to their lives. You might even start hanging out with a whole new group of peeps with similar interests. And who knows? You could even cross paths with someone pretty influential or powerful! (Maybe even a secret agent or a member of a secret society. Ooh la la!) Now, I gotta warn you, this is a time for transformation and change. You might end up saying bye-bye to old friends and groups that just don't vibe with you anymore. But don't worry, the new connections you make are gonna have a HUGE impact on your life. And hey, if you're lucky, you might even score a sweet scholarship or government grant for your scientific, artistic, or spiritual pursuits. Your beliefs and values are gonna shift too, and that's totally cool. But be careful not to get swept up in any impulses that don't align with your true desires. On the bright side, you could come across someone who'll be your mentor and show you the way to grow and flourish. So buckle up and get ready for a wild ride!.

12TH HOUSE

During this period, you'll be working on clearing out old and subconscious habits that might have been holding you back. It might feel like a psychological journey, as you'll be facing aspects of your psyche that you might have buried deep down. Be careful though, because sometimes your actions might be unconsciously motivated and could cause you problems, even if you had good intentions. If this happens, it's important to understand what's really going on inside and what parts of you might be in denial or disapproval. You might want to consider counseling to help you understand yourself better and overcome any obstacles that come up..

During this period, you'll have the opportunity to regenerate your subconscious and gain a deeper understanding of yourself. If Pluto is in sync with other aspects, this is a great time for intuitive exploration, meditation, and even discovering your clairvoyant abilities. The most important aspect of this Pluto transit is the psychological part, as it will bring up buried parts of your psyche that you'll need to confront..

It's important to note that you won't be able to hide any hidden characteristics during this time, as they'll come to the surface in destructive ways. You might also notice patterns of childish behavior that need to be corrected for you to become a mature adult. The key is to deal with these aspects of your life and past honestly and without guilt. You might even be surprised to find that when you're honest, your adversaries can change their opinion about you.

-> Back to the Pluto Transits

#astrojulia #astrology #astroblr #all about astrology #astro community #astro observations #astrology notes #witch community #witchblr #pluto #pluto transit #pluto transiting the houses

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