#osha handbook

[suweeka]

Hand over your forklift certification

[thatsonehellofahabit]

Tommy is unironically such a badass.

[knight-in-sour-armor]

[onceandfutureoshainspector]

- OKAY. okay. we are BACK, BABEY! at long FUCKING last.

    - i have tried to come back to this blog so many times. so many. it’s been a long six months, fam, but now that my journey through the wasteland is officially one year old, i felt it’d be appropriate to get back to this thing.

        - how do you play this game again?

- SO to finally wrap up Far Harbor, i think i just have the one location before i start tying everything off and confronting people - Beaver Creek Lanes.

    - (i’ve decided the all caps thing might be getting a bit old, gonna try spicing up the post style a bit)

- i’m already glad i didn’t skip this place, these are gold.

- as it turns out, our friendly local sabateur Madison Young was far and away the worst bowler in the entire league, despite playing more games than almost anyone. i mean holy fuck, that woman could not bowl for love or money.

    - that makes it so much funnier that she invited her crush to witness her abysmal lack of skill. i’m picturing this badass professional mercenary watching this limp-wristed secretary get her ninth consecutive gutterball and thinking “oh god i can’t not fuck her” XD

- there's a bunch more computer entries, i'll summarise:

    - the Vim vending machines were being vandalised, we already know why and by whom.

    - the league champion (and also one of the bowling alley staff) Thomas Davis joined the military, was wounded in action, and was due to come home in a wheelchair in a couple of months if the world hadn't ended. i think this explains the handicap in the league scorings - they were trying to adjust to accommodate his disability (they were also putting in a wheelchair ramp for him). love to see it.

    - there was some kind of incident with one of the ball return machines that almost injured someone and did substantial structural damage to the building? about a week before the apocalypse the place had to be shut down for safety reasons. my o.s.h.a. senses are tingling...

        - it sounds like they were trying to figure out a way for their returning friend to bowl from a wheelchair, maybe? i can count on one hand how many times i've been bowling in the last decade and none of them were in the last four years, so i couldn't tell you if there's some kind of connection between that and the incident.

            - also, the building is in surprisingly good nick for a place that was deemed in danger of collapse two hundred years ago, so it can't have been that bad.

- What. The hell. Is that.

[lostmemory-zip]

"Make" it compliant? Tommy, are we bending rules here :eyes emoji: ? /lh

I have no- I don't know what you're talking about.

[stormofneurosis]

well yeah, none of them are wearing lifejackets!

[tvcore-productions]

When You Hyperfixate a little to much on the Worldbuilding

Adding to much for the backround of the world so my fanfic made sense, than fixation went to mlp, made so much ideas and fav ocs that I stopped and moved back to Pokemon with wanting to make a chapter and not an immediate hyperfixation on worldbuilding that I worked so hard with so much symbolism and attention. Lovely ♡

- - - - - other and about

My fixation started with Gengars. Planned to make 15 chapter fic, it started with... A lot of scrapped ideas and experimentation with how to introduce my character and which pokegods to have or those alien ones.

know I have 3 Gengars that pur outlined to make a fic about and two are ones ahd the most fun projecting onto. And one of them is basically a main protagonist in the sequel of my other Gengar self insert oc.

I put way to much thought in the backrounds that I never fully completed a draft to chapter 1- Aha! Oh I just have so many details and small information of backround characters.

(Pretty roses with complementary white mini puff flowers)

As plain as an isekai is, I think the fact that I'm happy is great and the fact I put so much thought into why and creating atleast a somewhat original yet chaotically inspired by other stuff into a pot that I'm happy with is great- For me!

Because I don't think anyone would understand it to them when I'm horrible at explaining it.

I just hope I finnish making the Osha Violations chapter it seems like so much fun. And I do already have the entire rulesbook and how ot would be made

[popatochisssp]

you said tank worked in construction so i was wondering if he was union? divided we fall and all that ^^

Oh, Tank (Underfell Fruition Papyrus) is a union’s dream, and a toxic boss’ nightmare—he knows all the regulations and industry standards and labor laws by jurisdiction, and will not accept violations of any of them without raising it to whatever governing body needs to hear about it.

He’s admittedly not a quick reader, and does find it difficult…but it’s very important to him to know what the rules are, especially when it comes to safety, so he always takes the extra time to work through every handbook and manual and list that he’s given. And from there, he has a mind like a steel-trap so once he’s got it, he’s got it and no amount of obfuscating language or brush-off justifications will make him drop it when there's a problem.

Any workplace of Tank’s will be OSHA-compliant and treat its employees correctly, because he will make it so by his presence and action alone.

Not even the scariest and greediest of the corner-cutters and wage-thieves can intimidate someone of his size! 😩

[kingofthecrabs]

I only have two head cannons about epithet erased,

Howie Honeyglow has the entire OSHA handbook memorized and can recite with exact wording every infraction.

[knight-in-sour-armor]

[josiebelladonna]

not-at-all-friendly reminder that park slope cats is potentially breaking the law by having their employees/volunteers wear latex gloves during their rescues. i actually couldn’t find anything on a federal or state level but just looking over at what osha recommends, not only are they completely useless because they can very easily be torn (i’ve also seen alex do it bare-handed, which is a major violation of osha—never mind contracting things like cat scratch fever, tetanus, ringworm, distemper, all manner of parasites, even rabies, for a second. it just sounds illegal when i think about it), but they can give the cats an allergic reaction. they also shouldn’t be wearing their street clothes, either, especially when the cats they rescue are considered feral. they’re not “homeless”, they’re feral. unless they have those veterinary level vinyl or nitrile gloves on hand, it just blows my mind that no one’s caught this or said anything.

“oh, we put ourselves at risk every day.” no. NO.

fuck you, maddy. fuck you and the stupid architecture handbook you rode in on, it’s not “risk” at all. more like how fucking dumb do you have to be. more like “on a scale of careless self-absorbed self-victimizing misandrist asshole to fucking immature braindead idiot, how much more do you want me to smack the ever-loving shit out of you for possibly making alex sick with something horrible.”

really, don’t defend her. she’s violated osha at least twice that i know of, as well as the dress code for new york government buildings.

[fnafsbheadcanon]

Fazbear Entertainment has an entire section in their handbook specifically dedicated to the appropriate methods of killing OSHA inspectors, including how to get rid of the bodies, and what to do with their vehicle and belongings.

They also a inside spy Inside of OSHA to see what's there next move is and make sure they avoid Fazbear entertainment restaurants at cost and give OSHA false reports of the restaurant cleanness

[putting-mangle-everywhere]

Bookmark, OSHA Construction Safety Handbook

[the-arcade-doctor]

A line from my dream that could fit some member of this 'cade crew' perfectly.

"WELL, I WOULD COMMIT OSHA-COMPLIANT EVIL-DOOERY IF YOU AT LEAST GAVE ME THE HANDBOOK!"

jehehehe, nice

[an-aura-about-you]

I'm done with work and don't know what to do for dinner yet, so let's tackle another chapter of Handbook for Mortals why not?

jumping into Chapter 6 part 1:

when we last left our hero, Scheherazade just got asked to join Mac and the others on the next company camping trip. also there was a scene earlier with Sofia trying to flirt with Mac and I got very upset that this woman who had a nearly fatal accident at work just has no friends at all who give a shit about it and her boyfriend is also an asshole who doesn't care that she nearly died. seriously, what the fuck?

but let us press on anyway with Chapter 6: The Moon

-ngl I kinda wanna go camping. that's not related to anything that happens in this chapter, it's just something I've been thinking about all day. hell, I've even been looking at SUVs for whenever my car craps out because I wanna use it for van camping. (my car is perfectly fine btw, which shows you how wistful I'm being about this.)

-we start out on the camping trip itself. Zade spends all day swimming and has to put her tent up at night because she didn't think to do that first thing when she arrived. like, I've only been camping once on my own (or semi-on my own, camping where I was the one who had to put up my tent) and even I knew that's the first order of business. (it's also why I wanna switch to van camping. big tents are too unwieldy to put up by myself.)

-Zade is having trouble with it but refuses to ask for help because of her pride. Riley offers to help her, but she turns him down. but immediately after that, she's like, "I wish I was dating someone so they could help me put up the tent!" like, THAT'S the out she allows herself. it's not a pride thing if they have an obligation to do it on account of being your SO. but this is a company camping trip. why not share a tent with someone as friends? (oh wait, do you not have any friends? oh, that makes me sad.)

-Zade takes a moment to explain about light pollution in the city, which I wouldn't mind as much except she already talked about light pollution back in the chapter with Sofia's accident when she was sitting outside after all the action happened.

-actually I'm not sure why she goes on that tangent in the middle of setting up her tent. it doesn't turn into this thing of wanting to sleep under the stars, so it's just another one of her pointless rambles.

-she says she's happy that she feels like she belongs a little bit, but I'm not sure she actually does if she's not even sharing a tent with anyone. again, you can platonically share a tent. that's not weird at all. I've done it on pretty much every camping trip I've ever been on.

-she ends up using her magic to put the tent up. she's willing to risk using her magic in front of others to put her tent up but not to rescue Sofia from near death. no I am never going to shut up about this.

-after she gets her tent set up, she goes to the campfire where Jackson and Zeb are sitting. she takes the time to point out that Jackson looks ~angelic~ but Zeb looks a tad evil. why? because he doesn't care for your dumbassery?

-"Why does Zeb not like me?" ok, let's pretend I'm unaware that Zeb knows for real magic and is pissed at Zade carelessly flaunting it in front of everybody. his very first impression of you is your special snowflake audition that either you or Charles apparently thought required the entire theater company of 200 people who all had their own jobs they were supposed to be doing. THEN you nearly punched out Mac because he was rightfully concerned about OSHA compliance, something Zeb said he agrees with, only for the boss to effectively overrule the both of them. you've had no scenes where you try to talk to him and just before you joined the campfire you thought he looked evil. what reason have you given him TO like you? but also, you realize all of your coworkers don't have to like you, right? Zeb is not obligated to like you; no one is. add another tally to wanting friends as objects and not because Zade actually gives a shit about having a good working relationship with Zeb.

-hah! Jackson explains that the talent comes and goes at the theater and guesses that Zeb is being cold because he doesn't expect Zade to last. tbh that's fair, but also I do wonder if Zeb is aware of Zade being Spellman's daughter. like, ok, so it's not stated for like ages, but Spellman has some kind of magic taboo (presumably from Dela) that forbids him from being able to tell people Zade is his daughter? I don't know how it works, if it's going to actually get explained, or how he's able to break it later because I know he DOES break it later. BUT as far as I know that only limits Spellman from saying it. anyone else who knows already could theoretically say, which is what I basically guessed with Sofia earlier. I don't think Zeb is as likely to know because he doesn't seem the Facebook sort, but I also don't know when the taboo was placed on Spellman. we also know Zeb is around Spellman's age, so it's possible that Zeb learned by Spellman telling him before the taboo was put on him depending on how long they've worked together. no matter what, I'm certain I'm putting more thought into this whole matter than Sarem did.

-also I'm pretty sure the taboo only exists to preserve the stupid twist.

-Jackson asks if Zade is an outdoorsy sort and Zade thinks to herself that she is to a certain extent as witches often spend a lot of time outdoors, which is as good an opening as any for me to really vent about Zade and her witchcraft.

disclaimer: while I am indeed a witch, my practice is my own and ultimately I can only speak for myself and what I've learned.

okay. witches. we've got two kinds of witches in the book, but they are effectively the same the way Sarem is writing it: fantasy magic witches and real world witches. often real world witchcraft is tied to a religion, but it doesn't have to be. (for example, while I do have my own spiritual beliefs, I do not follow any particular religion regarding them, which means my witchcraft is technically separate from religion.) and honestly this kind of thing bothers me because it is so seldom done well. the only times I can really point out when I think a fictional work does this sort of thing in a good way are examples like the Lunar games or Rusty Quill Gaming.

it is established later that Zade and Dela's witchcraft is part of their religious practices. I've already said that it's going to be established that Zade is Jewish and I am not Jewish nor do I know enough to properly get into that. but I will look at the other elements given to us.

so, witches and the outdoors. that's... not necessarily untrue? but it is a narrow way to look at it. there are basically as many different ways to practice witchcraft as there are witches. there are witches who keep their grimoires and books of shadow on their smartphones for goodness sake. it is my understanding that the nature aspect, while not exclusive to these beliefs, is more closely tied to Wicca, and that IS something I've been noticing with the book in the little details like how Sarem insists on spelling it "magick" and the repeated use of the triple moon imagery. but. Zade's not Wiccan??

and I'm not gonna lie, I totally swipe things from my old religion to use in my own practice since it's just inescapably part of my family and my history. I'm all for mix and match diy religion and witchcraft. but I feel like with this book specifically it's falling into the trope a lot of media that touches on this does which is Wicca=Witchcraft and Witch=Wiccan. and that is simply not true. it is possible to be a witch without being a Wiccan. it is possible to be Wiccan without practicing witchcraft. and as far as the real world practices go, I don't care for the gatekeepy notion of being born a witch. obviously it's possible to be born to a family that practices witchcraft and grow up learning it, but the one hard rule in my head for a person to be a witch is they practice witchcraft. if you don't practice witchcraft, you are not a witch. simple as that.

I suppose all of this is a moot point because it's not like Zade is going to give us any true worldbuilding about how witchcraft works in her world. we're just hungry dogs fighting for scraps.

whew that was a lot to get off my chest.

-Jackson asks Zade where home is and her immediate answer is Tennessee. why did you leave if that's where home is for you? what is the purpose of your journey? you know you could have just. moved to another part of Tennessee if you didn't want to live with your mom anymore, right? this is the sort of thing that should ideally build to Zade realizing her home is with her friends, but in order for that to work she has to actually build those relationships.

-it has been a good few weeks and Zade has not made any contact with Dela since she left. *Dominic Noble Voice* Girl, it's your mother! Give her a damn update!

-no joke, Sarem spends more than a full fucking page describing the outfit Mac is wearing on the camping trip.

-also Zade doesn't like beards. I mean I guess that's an opinion a person can have but why would they? (I say this like I'm not dealing with my own hair sensory issues but c'mon beards look good.)

-oh. Zade straight up says, "It's nice to hang out with people and pretend as if I have friends." that's. really sad. you've known these people for a few weeks, let's just arbitrarily call it three months or so, and you don't have any friends? I know you haven't been trying, but due to your mary sue-ness, a LOT of people have been trying to be your friend. and that's how it happens sometimes, one person puts more effort in on the outset because maybe someone's shy or hurt or something. but it's months later and you're only pretending you have friends? is. is this just a reflection of Sarem's life?

I'm going to put something here from The Disaster Artist by Greg Sestero and Tom Bissell. this is a book about the making of Tommy Wiseau's film The Room, often said to be one of the worst films ever made. in this section, Tommy is looking over some footage of the movie in which a few characters, including his, are throwing a football around in an alley:

Tommy watched the footage of the scene with his headphones on. He was staring so intently at the monitor that some of us became certain that Tommy saw this scene, at last, as the pointless disaster it undeniably was. Sandy tried to comfort Tommy. "It's okay," he said, tapping him on the shoulder. "Forget this scene. Nothing happens in it anyway. Save your money. Let's move on and film the living room stuff." Tommy looked back at Sandy in shock. "No," he said, smiling. "This is good, fun scene. We have good chemistry. And look at this." He directed Sandy's attention to the monitor. "You see that? I look strong, like little eighteen-years-old kid." That's when I realized why the scene meant so much to him: In that monitor, at least, Tommy was young and had a fun life and many, many friends.

I don't know Lani Sarem. I know what she's done, obviously, and I think her attitude regarding that as well as some other subjects we've touched on is truly despicable. I have seen others who know her talk about how they do not like her and do not care for these antics of hers. I suppose this is what pity is for. Sarem has written a fantasy in which she gets everything she's ever wanted, explicitly wrote it so she could live vicariously through Zade, and even in her ideal life she has to pretend she has friends. I struggle to think of anything sadder than that.

I. I think I'm going to take a break on this chapter and get some dinner.

[strongermonster]

every once in a while i have to send safety emails to my american cohorts (updates mostly, but also when we've done something accidentally Bad, or, much more rarely, something accidentally Good), and it's my job to inform them of it + link to where it has relevant information in MY jurisdictions handbooks—which is the ontario occupational health and safety act, or ohsa, (¹) which you may or may not note is remarkably similar to osha (occupational safety and health administration), which is american only. there's lots of clauses and laws and paragraphs that are very similar, if not the same, but they are not the same governing body, at all, full stop.

from there, they're supposed to review whatever happened, find the corresponding laws from their own country/province/state/whatever, and decide if the bad thing that happened is worth correcting/the good thing that happened is worth implementing. it's a bit dry and time consuming work, but it's dead simple. google and government websites are free. the only possible way this could be easier is if i spoon-fed it to them.

and despite all of us present knowing how this works + there are multiple countries at play, i STILL get regular responses to emails that are like "sorry, you misspelled osha a bunch here", "i think your osha handbook is outdated? i can't find that information on that page." "oh your info is wrong, this links to a .ca domain, this should be for ohio."

you guys are killing me. i start off every email saying where i'm from. this ONLY happens with the americans. help me help you. please read the email. should i highlight/bold/italicize all the key information? should i send my emails as pdfs with custom backgrounds of the canadian flag and little dancing maple syrups?? what is it that i need to do for you Get it. the rest of canada has no problem finding their provincial version. the australians never complain. the ones who don't speak english as a first language do just fine. what is it that's not working here

¹ also ccohs/canadian centre for occupational health and safety, but i don't use that one even half as much for some reason?? i always forget it exists.